#i mean of course not every crush is like that but the vast majority have been for me

[avatarmerida]

It’s been awhile since I’ve had something to share but this is the piece I wanted to have ready for Valentine’s Day but better late than never, right? No plot really, just cringe fluff 💛💚

———

Hunter had a very specific way of managing stress. If there was something he needed or wanted to do that was important and he found it was overwhelming him, he would simply plan a series of slightly smaller but equally important tasks ahead of it to make the original task seem less intimidating.

It worked wonders in the coven. When he tried to work up the nerve to ask his uncle something important, he prolonged it by setting goals for himself to run a certain distance in a certain amount of time or memorize portions of the handbook or to make a certain amount of arrests first. The lists grew longer and more elaborate and while he did end up doing some things that previously caused him a great deal of anxiety, he still found a way to put off the thing he truly needed to do.

And despite the progress he had made, old habits die hard.

So now, here he was in the middle of Grom supposed to be enjoying the fruits of his labor but all he could do was scream internally. He had done the impossible, he had asked Willow to Grom and yet he couldn’t enjoy it because there was more (or at least there was supposed to be). Normally, this would be the impossible task he aspired to accomplish but he had one more outlandish feat to reach for and he was having trouble finding a solid, logical reason to keep putting it off.

“Gus,” Hunter whispered nervously under the guise of coming up to his table to request a song . “Are we totally sure that Willow knows we’re here together like on a date?”

Gus’ smile faded as he lowered his glasses to give his friend a look. “Seriously dude?” said Gus with a familiar sigh, having been there at every step of Hunter’s doubt and anxiety regarding his feelings for their friend. “I was there: she said yes. She said yes and hugged you and like a billion flowers bloomed in her hair. She was obviously so beyond happy that you asked her, why are you so worried?”

“Because of how I said it,” groaned Hunter. “I said ‘do you want to go to Grom’ I didn’t say ‘with me’ or ‘as a date.’ I mean, of course she wanted to go!”

“Hunter, seriously?”

“Yes, seriously!”

With no impending doom or unrealistic and unhealthy expectations set for him, Hunter’s mind had more time and room to focus on more pleasant things. His feelings for Willow had been progressing slowly in the background but now that he was embracing what it meant to be a normal teenager, his feelings rose to the surface as soon as they could. Now there was no reason to feel guilty about getting distracted by the sound of her laughter or practicing jokes in the mirror before bed each night to try and impress her. No, guilt was not a feeling he associated with Willow but the feelings he did associate with the plant witch were unique and powerful and confusing.

Hunter’s friends had assured him this was a totally normal way to feel about a crush, but Hunter didn’t have much experience with normalcy and he highly doubted that he’d ever get used to the way his lungs stopped working when she stood near him. So when he had decided to do something about these feelings, he approached it with the extreme attention detail he had always approached everything.

The only difference was that unlike a vast majority of his other interests, Willow was real.

“Well usually when you do a gromposal it means you want to go as more than friends ,” said Gus. “Otherwise you say ‘hey since we don’t have dates let’s all go to Grom as friends.’ You usually don’t spend all night arranging her favorite flowers to spell ‘GROM?’ on the flyer derby field for someone you like as just a friend.”

Hunter blushed, rather pleased with how his efforts had turned out. He had aimed for something both grand and personal in hopes it would translate to romantic. It had been a unique challenge to get Willow to look down as she was so focused on winning their usual end of practice match (loser paid for the eyescream) but when she finally did, her expression was priceless.

They had flown back up so she could take a selfie with it in the background and he had made it his scroll’s wallpaper because he simply could not stop looking at it.

“But we had already agreed to go as a group so how can I be sure that she knows I asked her specifically because I like her as more than just a friend if we’re doing group things all night because I don’t know what to do on a date.”

“You can just be direct, dude,” said Gus. “Tell her you like her and you’re having a good time and stuff.”

Hunter had no problem doing that, he had done it plenty of times. Whenever Willow planned something or suggested they do something like that, he always made sure to tell her what a nice time he had. It was just proper manners. But complementing her in a way that voiced his constant thoughts was another thing. He could tell her the cafe she suggested was a great spot any day of the week, or that her plants were looking strong, but he wanted to tell her his admiration for her far surpassed anything she merely did , it encompassed everything she was . It was confusing because it seemed like something beyond mere words, he wanted to express his gratitude every time she messaged him or said his name or walked into a room.

For some reason he thought Grom would give him the courage to do it.

“It’s just that… there’s… more …”

“More?” Gus repeated, intrigued. “More how ?”

“It’s just… well Luz might have mentioned- and I’m not saying this is the only reason I asked Willow to come with me- that sometimes at Grom people who are more than friends have certain ways to… express that.”

Gus narrowed his eyes and offered Hunter a knowing smirk. “You wanna kiss her, don’t you?”

Hunter wrung his hands as his breathing became shallow, his eyes darting over to Willow laughing with Luz and Amity and Hunter felt a familiar lightheadedness that the event’s ambiance had been amplifying all night.

“Yes,” he said breathlessly, knowing he couldn’t and truthfully did not want to deny it. “Yeah. I do. Very much.”

“Dude!” Gus explained, playfully punching him in the arm. “That’s great! You should go for it!”

“I mean, there’s just one problem with that…”

“What? Bad breath?”

“No, I- wait,” Hunter quickly checked his breath to ensure he hadn’t neglected that detail. He had been chewing mints all day. “No, not that. It’s just that, well, uh,” he chuckled nervously as the words quickly spilled out of him. “Willow maaaay be under the impression that I don’twanttokissher.”

“And whyyy exactly would she think that?”

“Well…”

Three weeks earlier:

“Hunter!” Willow greeted him joyfully as she opened the door to find him waiting with an equally wide smile to hers. “Hi! You’re right on time!”

“Oh, that’s a relief, I timed my pace so I would be,” he said

“Did you bring the stuff?” Willow asked with a giggle.

He held up his book bag with pride. “Got it all right here, safe and sound.”

“Perfect!” said Willow, her voice low and mischievous. “Let’s go!”

“Perfect! Yeah, okay let’s go-woah!”

Willow excitedly reached out to take his wrist to pull him inside and Hunter happily trailed after her.

“Dad! Papa! Hunter is here and he says hi and we’re gonna be in my room!” she called as she ran up the stairs.

“Okay petal, sounds good! Hello Hunter!” called Harvey.

“Hello sirs!” Hunter called back as best he could.

“Have fun!” Gilbert added.

“We will!” Willow called back as they finally made it to her room and just as she was about to shut the door behind them, her fathers added in unison:

“And make sure the door stays open!”

Willow groaned in defeat as she obliged, as though she had been hoping to outrun the instruction.

“Why do they always say that?” Hunter asked as he unpacked his bag, a collection of threads and patches as they prepared for a long evening of uniform customization to surprise the Entrails for their upcoming game with personalized jackets. Darius was always asking him to close his door, mostly because of how loud he liked to play his music.

“Oh, you know how they get,” she said simply, rolling her eyes endearingly. “They’re just overprotective.”

“Are they… scared of me?” Hunter asked, his voice low and hurt and Willow jumped to address the misunderstanding.

“Oh, no! No, nothing like that I promise,” Willow assured him with a smile he knew could never be deceptive. “No, they love you, they really do. They wanna give us our space but they also wanna make sure we’re not up here kissing.”

Hunter completely stopped working.

"What?” he basically squeaked after a moment, certain he had misheard her somehow.

“Oh, well ya know if we keep the door open then they think we’ll be less likely to kiss because they can like walk by and see,” Willow explained casually as she went to help him unpack the bag.

“W-why would they think we would be up here k-kissing?” Hunter asked in a panicked chuckle before clearing his throat, he felt like he was on the surface of the sun. “Ya know, cause we’re totally not.”

“Well, yeah I know that but if we leave the door open they’ll know that too,” said Willow with a shrug. “Personally, I think they’re just nosey because of how they used to be when they played flyer derby.”

“How come they never say it when Gus is with us?’

“Uh, it’s just a dad thing I guess,” said Willow, as she sorted the supplies trying not to show the mild blush creeping on her face. She knew why but she didn’t know how to say how she knew why.

“Just a dad thing, sure,” Hunter repeated lightly. So her dads thought there was a possibility they would kiss? Cool, cool, cool, no biggie. He knew he had been the last one to arrive at the Park residence several times and opened the door to find her and Gus laughing on their scrolls, or Luz or Amity would be over when he came to pick her up to go train and often the door was even locked. No he was the common denominator. He suddenly recalled Camila had a similar rule for when Luz and Amity were left alone. His mind raced to connect the dots as he realized that the Parks thought that if the two of them were specially left unsupervised, that they would…

“Ha ha yeah! A dad thing, totally!” Hunter exclaimed with forced laughter. “So totally not based on anything! Haha, because that would never happen!”

“Um, okay?”

“Yeah because we don’t, I mean we’ve never, we would never… I mean, what?”

“Are you okay, Hunter?” asked Willow, sitting on the edge of her bed beside him. He suddenly was aware of how often they sat on her bed together. Why did that make him feel nervous?

“Yeah, I’m totally fine!” he said, very much aware of how much he was sweating. “I’m great! I’m totally not thinking about kissing you! Ya know, if you want I can run downstairs and let your dads know they don’t have to worry about the door because of how much I don’t think about it!”

“Um…”

“I mean, you and me? Us? Kissing? Pssh!” Hunter continued, unaware of how to stop talking. “Who even thinks about that sometimes? That’s, uh, woah that’s a good one!”

Willow’s fathers must have read his mind or his diary somehow because Hunter had definitely thought about it. Never on purpose, it’s just one of those random scenarios that your mind makes up every few days, right? He couldn’t help that one day he realized that Willow was the perfect height to kiss on the forehead. Like, it would take very little effort just to lean forward and gently press her lips below her hairline. It had been in the human realm, the first time he had helped her in the garden and had ended up being chased by a swarm of bees. When Clover stepped in to explain things, she pulled him into an embrace to ensure he hadn’t been hurt and to let him know how happy she was that he had come out with her. When he looked down to assure her that he was fine, the thought devoured every corner of his mind. The action would certainly convey his feelings, would summarize words he wasn’t sure had been invented yet. It would just be really nice actually.

Over time, that thought evolved. His daydreams wandered to fetch visions of some nicer timeline where they had met under different circumstances and he was the kind of bold who kissed her hand when they met or kissed her cheek when they parted ways. The first time his unconscious mind leapt to insert them in place of O’Bailey and Ivy in the famous scene under the endless moon of Jupiter 7 where they sealed their love for each other with a kiss, Hunter awoke in a cold sweat feeling like he had reached a point of no return. But it must not be okay because Willow’s dads were clearly taking actions to prevent it and Hunter felt he needed to deny these claims, lest the front door to the Park house be closed to him forever.

“I mean, w-why would I try to kiss you? That just seems so-.”

“I got it, Hunter,” said Willow sternly as she rose to move the supplies to her desk. She kept her back to him as she organized the needles and threads. Her voice lacked its usual spunk, it was a tone he was unfamiliar with. “Message received, you don’t wanna kiss me. I’ll let my dads know they have nothing to worry about.”

---

“Dude…” was all Gus could say as Hunter finished his retelling.

“I know, I know!” Hunter groaned as he covered his face with his hands. “It’s bad, right?”

“It’s…not great,” Gus couldn’t lie. “But hey, it didn’t stop her from saying yes! That’s good, right?”

“But her dads think there’s a possibility that I would want to kiss her so much that they keep the door open to prevent it,” Hunter was letting all his pent up worries spiral out of him while Willow was out of earshot, but luckily Gus had become a pro at reeling him back in.

“They probably just remember what it's like to be young and have a crush on someone.”

“How do her dads know I have a crush on her?”

Gus couldn’t help but roll his eyes a little. “I mean, did you ever consider that you weren’t the one they were worried about?”

“What do you mean? I was the only one there.”

“I just mean, they know Willow better than they know you…”

“I’m not following.”

Gus sighed, knowing that the sharing of Willow’s feelings was not his responsibility but he couldn’t help relating to her frustration with Hunter’s inability to pick up hints no matter how obvious.

“Hunter, you got this far, just be honest.” he said sincerely. “We both know you want to tell her you like her.”

“I mean is that too much for one night?” Hunter asked in a panicked whisper. “Should I tell her I like her first and then reschedule the ki- or, hold on it’s probably weird to schedule that, huh? I mean what if she doesn’t feel that way about me and then boom! I’ve ruined her night because she’ll always remember this Grom as the night she couldn’t enjoy herself because I don’t know how to tell her I think about kissing her without being weird. Titan, and she just looks so… gah, is it hot in here?”

“Hunter, I promise nothing could ruin this night for Willow,” Gus chuckled. “Do you remember how excited she was when you asked her? You barely finished the question before she tackled you, you guys nearly fell to your death because she was so happy. It’s all she’s been talking about all week, I promise that you telling her you think she’s awesome will not ruin her night.”

“You sure?”

“Positive,” Gus said confidently. “Just don’t get too in your head, you know? Willow cares about you, she wants you to have a good time too. She’s not gonna care if you’re a bad kisser.”

“Thanks Gus, you know I really-,” Hunter cut himself off and offered his friend a glare as his voice became low and menacing. “I didn’t say I was worried I’d be a bad kisser.”

As Gus continued to attempt giving his friend a pep talk, across the room Willow could not take her eyes off Hunter.

“Doesn’t he look so cute?” sighed Willow dreamily as she stood beside Luz at the punch bowl.

“Darius and I may have to disagree with you on that,” Amity laughed as she poured Luz some punch. “After all the hours we spent suit shopping and at the tailor, he comes down the stairs in another ensemble from 2008.”

“Well you said he couldn’t wear the Cosmic Frontier cosplay,” Luz reminded her girlfriend. “So he had to make an impression somehow , and you know how much he wants to impress Willow.”

“Did he really say that?” Willow took a break from her string to gleefully ask. She felt like she was going to leap out of her skin as she looked back at him knowing he had gone out of his way to put in so much effort for her sake yet again. “Well you can tell him it’s working.”

“Ew, tell him yourself,” Amity groaned playfully.

“Oof, believe me I’m trying,” Willow chuckled softly.

“Are you guys having fun on your daaaaate?” Luz asked with a raised eyebrow.

She waved at him from across the room and he bashfully waved back, straightening his spine when he saw he had her attention. Willow giggled, finding it charming and endearing. She had been looking forward to this moment for weeks, preparing to ask him before he had beaten her to it. She knew he wanted tonight to be special, he was going all out at every turn to make sure she was comfortable and having fun.

She couldn’t help but hope it was all leading to something more.

Two weeks ago:

They were walking down the sidewalk in the human realm, revisiting an ice cream shop they had grown fond of when they had been trapped in the human realm. They had made sure to get a pint of their newest flavor of the month for Gus who had stayed at the Noceda’s to help Camila set up her old projector for a special viewing of the Cosmic Frontier holiday special that had only aired once that she had recently found her old recording of on a device even Luz considered historic.

Willow had recently caught up with the reading required to understand the special, but Camila had informed her that it was not canon and rather controversial in the fandom. This excited Willow and so she was spending their walk back trying to guess the wildest thing that could happen as though composing a bingo list to enhance the experience.

“...I also think they’ll reveal Ivy has a twin and O’Bailey will go to confess his feelings and then you find out it’s her twin and so it won’t count,” Willow continued. “And I know no one knows O’Bailey’s secret and it feels like they definitely don’t find out until closer to the end but I feel like memory loss is gonna be a big part of-.”

“I would wanna kiss you!” he blurted, unable to hold it in anymore. It had been weighing on him all week and hearing her talk about his favorite thing while looking so stunning sent him over the edge.

“What?”

“Er not right now!” He said, realizing the volume of his admission made it seem like he intended to follow though at that very moment. “I mean well yes right now as in I still feel that way but I’m not saying it because that’s what I… I just, I mean last week when I said that I wouldn’t kiss you I wasn’t saying that because I thought it would be unlikeable or unpleasant.”

“Oh,” Willow said, shaking herself out of her daze as she made the connection. “Wait, is that why you’ve been acting so weird?”

“I’ve been acting weird?”

“No, well yes but no I mean,” Willow smiled as she swung the bag of treats, feeling giddy at his timing. “I could tell you’ve been worried about something, but have you been making yourself crazy just to tell me that kissing me wouldn’t be so bad?”

That was definitely part of the reason but a larger percentage was what he had planned for tomorrow after practice: a gromposal that had been in the works since he had learned the term. But he couldn't give that way, not just yet.

“I just wanted to make sure I hadn’t offended you.” Hunter said softly. “I didn't want you to think I didn't want to because it didn't sound appealing, I’m sure it would be… nice.”

“So then what's the real reason you don't wanna kiss me?” Willow asked with a sly smile that faltered when she saw the color leave Hunter’s face. “Oh no Hunter, I was only teasing! It’s fine, really! I know you didn’t mean anything by it! It’s okay, really!”

“I just meant that your dads wouldn’t need to worry because I would never kiss you unless you wanted me to,” Hunter clarified with a deep breath. There, perfect. Now they could continue their way back to the house in peace and there would be nothing more to worry about or-

“Okay what if I said I wanted you to,” she began, her voice dancing and spinning like a vine twisting its way to the top of a fence, eager to see the other side. “What if I said I wanted you to and you had no doubt that I was totally okay with it? Would you… do it then?

“Is that… what's happening right now?”

Willow bit her lip as she took in the sight of the tall, nervous boy in front of her. He cared about her so much, so much it made him nervous. She knew everything he cared about he cared about intensely and with unbreakable loyalty. But she had suspected for awhile that the way he cared about her was different. That was what made it so familiar to her.

“What would you say if it was?” She said, giving a non answer. Because it was one thing to say ‘I want to kiss you’ but somehow even harder to ask ‘Do you want to kiss me?’ because didn’t other conversations have to happen first? Surely he was holding back because of the feeling that needed to be attached. Willow was nearly positive they shared these feelings, she was so so certain that a mind reader would know they were on the same page but neither wanted to risk losing what they had built by adding something heavier on.

But actions were louder than words, and a little harder to misinterpret.

“I uh, well I guess I-I would say…” Hunter stuttered to try and give a response without giving too much away. He had no way to support his theory with experience, but he knew that kissing Willow would be pleasant, it would be warm and soft and safe. But he couldn’t speak to the experience she would have.

But Willow once again shared his thoughts.

When Willow had woken up that morning, she had not intended to kiss Hunter in the middle of the sidewalk forgetting the urgency of getting their icy treats home before they melted, but at this moment she couldn’t imagine continuing the day without doing so. So many times they had been on the brink and being more, of something slipping that platonic friends did not harbor for one another. It was small and dramatic and silly and confusing and always there like a snowball rolling down a hill growing faster and bigger with every inch. She had always been a fan of directness, of being open and honest but she didn’t know how to say she felt this way plainly. It could be done in three words, nothing crazy complicated about that, right?

But something always held her back.

As she tried to summon a response both clever and truthful to try and help him find his own, the sound of church bells reminded them they were on a timed limit. More specifically, they were supposed to be back at the house before four o clock, which the bells indicated it now was.

“Well, anyway, we should probably be getting back,” he said, releasing a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “I know Gus is probably jumping off the walls waiting for us and I really wanna hear more of your theories.”

“Yeah, right of course,” said Willow softly, as she tried to shake away the haze she had wandered into. “Besides, they won’t stay cold forever but also my fingers are starting to freeze.”

“Oh well here let me take it,” said Hunter, his nerves letting up when he saw an opportunity to help her. Before she could say anything, he maneuvered the bag from her grip. “The cold doesn’t bother me anyway, it’s a grimwalker thing.”

She knew even if it did he would endure it for her sake. It was an action so simple and small but it made her heart spin every time he leapt to her aide. It wasn’t because he thought she needed his help but because he enjoyed helping her, because maybe he was looking for any reason to be closer to her, even for a moment.

“Well aren’t you sweet,” she said. As Hunter readjusted his grip on the bags, she went onto her tip toes and placed a quick but purposeful kiss to his cheek and continued to walk as though it was no big deal. “Thanks Hunter.”

Hunter froze, trying to process and replay and stay conscious. It had been so swift and soft but it was as though the brush of her lips inspired the world to stop and adopt new colors. It was like something finally clicked in his mind, that he had thought it so impossible because he did not know how to take that step but he should have known he would once again follow Willow’s lead.

Willow smiled to herself, knowing in an instant that her risk had paid off. He quickly caught up her as she continued with her Cosmic Frontier theories, secretly delighted by the way his face was red the rest of the way home.

The ball was in his court.

-

“Do you guys think he asked me because he likes me or because he knows how much I’ve always wanted a gromposal?” Willow asked.

“Um… both?” said Amity as she and Luz shared a confused and slightly concerned look.

“Willow, are you seriously doubting that Hunter is crazy about you?” Luz asked sternly.

“Well, I mean he could still like me and still have asked me just as a friend,” said Willow. “He’s been doing a lot to try and be a normal teenager, what if he just thought that Gromposals were a part of that because of how much I was talking about them when I thought I was dropping hints?”

“Well in my experience, friends don’t normally practice in their bedroom mirror how they’re going to ask just friends to dance with them,” said Luz.

“Well, I’ll believe it when I see it,” Willow said with a smile, Hunter actually had managed that. He could spin and shuffle with the best of them, but every time the music started to slow down he made an excuse to leave for the duration of the song. He would dance beside her, and she could tell he had practiced a few moves to impress her, but they weren’t dancing together . But she had a feeling with how much he built up the gromposal that he wanted his dance ask to be equally special.

“I’m pretty sure he’s waiting for the right song,” said Amity. “There’s this one he found in the human realm that Darius said he’s been playing nonstop because it reminds him of you.”

“Really?”

Amity’s eyes widened. “And I’m just now realizing that that was supposed to be a secret,” she grimaced. “Please forget I said anything.”

Across the room, Gus and Hunter were also discussing the song.

“Hunter, being the Grom host I have an obligation to keep the evening to a certain flow,” said Gus. “I can’t keep pushing back your song, the music has to flow, bro.”

“I know, I know,” he said nervously swirling his punch. “It’s just… every time I know it’s coming up I get in my head.”

The first few notes would start to play and Hunter would instinctively run past the joining couples with envy in the pit of his stomach to tell Gus to wait a little longer. The crowd would quickly recover, as Gus always knew the perfect transition out, and Hunter would walk back to her no closer to his goal than he was before.

“Well I have it queued up to play after we take our photo, so its time to figure it out,” said Gus sternly. “The worst thing that could happen is she says no.”

But that wasn’t true. Because she could say yes, thinking him asking meant he knew what he was supposed to do, but he knew if he was meant to take Willow by the waist and pull her close to him he would be paralyzed. And even if he wasn’t, what if after all the extreme movement he smelled or was sweaty and Willow would regret being so close to him? What if he tripped and fell? What if he stepped on her toes?

What if he thought about kissing her again?

In his mind he thought about using the idea of asking her to dance to delay the higher issue but Gus was right; it was time to figure it it

He didn’t ask Willow to Grom so he could sit in the corner hyperventilating about how much he liked her, no he wanted her to have a good time, and that was the perfect goal to distract him.

“Gus, do you have the song Willow likes? The one from the shoe commercial?”

“I might have had Luz help me get it, why do you ask?” Gus asked with a smirk that said he already knew.

“Can you play it?”

Hunter knew it would get Willow back on the dance floor in an instant, and he intended to be there when she rushed on in excitement. The iconic notes echoed, and Hunter saw Willow’s ears perk up as she turned her head to see it was true. In the human realm, Willow had been obsessed with the cheesy shoe commercial that played nonstop. And thusly, Hunter had been obsessed with how obsessed with it she was. It was improbable, everyone dancing in the street uninterrupted by traffic just because of how comfortable their shoes were.

Hunter stood in the center of the floor, his eyes locked confidentiality on her as they both knew what they had to do. Hunter got a running start and slid on his knees to her and quickly leapt up and gave her a wink, just as the actors did. Willow nearly squealed in delight, recognizing the reference instantly. She quickly grabbed his hand to lead him onto the floor and he happily followed behind her, feeling as though they traveled in slow motion. They fell into a comfortable rhythm, spinning and singing along just as they often did in the Noceda living room. It was too silly to be scary as Hunter found himself seeing her under the reflection of the mirror ball, her eyes shining as everything else around her melted away.

“You’re a really good dancer,” Willow said, catching her breath as the song started to fade out.

“Thanks,” he said, equally breathless. “Y-you too. Not that I’m surprised! You’re good at everything.”

She bit her lip as she brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “Well, it helps to have a great partner,” she said shyly.

Hunter laughed nervously, becoming hyper aware of how close they were, how close they had been during the song. He saw her hand hovered beside his and he gently swung his own to knock into hers as though by accident. She inched closer.

“Well, just to be clear, you’re the great partner here,” Hunter said modestly, and Willow couldn’t help but blush, a string of small yellow flowers blooming in her hair. Something compelled him to take her hand, and he rubbed his fingers over her knuckle. He cleared his throat. “Willow, do you think-.”

“Willow! Hunter! C’mon! We’re next in line for the photo booth!” Gus called.

“We’ll be right there!” Willow called before turning back to him, giving his hand a small squeeze. “I’m sorry, what were you gonna say?”

He gulped, having the perfect chance to chicken out but knowing he didn’t want to. He pressed on right where he left off. “You think you might wanna dance some more after we take a photo? Like, just you and me? To like… a slower song?”

“Like a slower… romantic song?” Willow asked, testing the waters.

“Yeah, yeah t-the song could be romantic,” he gulped. “I-I-I’d prefer it to be romantic. With you.”

“Okay cool,” Willow said with a wide smile, sliding closer to him and lacing their fingers together. “Me too.”

“R-really?”

“Yeah,” she said brightly, absolutely smitten by the utterly adorable and shocked look he wore. “I’m having a really nice time with you, Hunter,”

He hadn’t messed it up. She was having a nice time, she was having a nice time with him. He took a deep breath and the words just started to pour out of him.

“Willow I just wanted to say that I’m having a great time with you too and that I always have a good time with you and when I asked you to Grom I didn’t ask you as a friend even though I really like being your friend but I asked you because I like you romantically and if you would prefer staying just friends I’m okay with that but I just wanted to thank you for agreeing to accompany me and express my admiration for you because I think you’re the coolest person I’ve ever met and also you look so pretty tonight it makes me feel dizzy.”

He leaned down and removed his hand from hers to cup her cheek as he quickly pressed a kiss to the other side before rushing to meet the others. His face was completely red and he fought through the lightheadedness to keep walking, stuffing his hands in his pockets to try and seem casual. He was too overwhelmed to wait to see her reaction.

He didn’t see that she was utterly enchanted as she watched him hurry with wide eyes as she touched the spot where he had kissed. A delighted smile overtook her face as she fluffed her dress and proceeded to float in the booth after him, her eyes fixated and determined. She was deaf to the chaos around her as the boy became surrounded by a vibrant, rosy frame. She had no doubt they were on the same page now, and the ball had returned to her court.

“Took you guys long enough! Tell Luz you vote for my pose first!” said Vee as Hunter was the first of the two to enter the booth, the rest of their friends in the middle of trying to agree on how to take the photo.

“Can we all even fit?” Amity asked as they tried to arrange themselves in frame.

“Yeah we just have to squeeze!” announced Luz. from beside her. “Gus, move over!”

“I will if Hunter does!” He replied as he turned to face his friend. “Hunter, dude, why-.”

Gus was greeted by Hunter wearing a face that he could only describe as seasick. His face was contorted like he wasn’t sure what to feel and as Willow entered his view just behind him wearing a soft, calm expression Gus knew why.

“You did it, didn’t you?” He whispered with a gasp and Hunter merely nodded, still feeling as though he could combust. Gus jumped up and gave his best friend a celebratory noogie.

“Willow, do you wanna stand by us or-.” Amity began to ask before catching sight of the dizzy expression her friend wore, an expression she knew all too well. She instantly knew the cause as she went to stand beside Hunter who was attempting to fix his hair. “No way,” she gasped as Willow wordlessly confirmed her thought by looking her focus on Hunter, shaking away the small flowers that had bloomed atop her head once again.

“Told you Amity!” Gus called victoriously before leaning down to whisper to Vee what had happened.

“Hunter, your bow tie is crooked,” called Luz as she pulled Vee back into the frame, too focused on preserving the memory to realize what was enfolding behind her.

“I’ll fix it,” said Willow with a dreamy smile as she reached out to adjust his tie. “I need to make sure my date looks his best for the photo, right?”

Hunter let out a high-pitched chuckle as Willow pulled him closer, and he didn’t really care that she technically wasn’t fixing his bow tie as her words echoed in his ears.

Date… date… date.

My date. She said he was her date. They were on a date, and they both knew it. She was his date and having a good time and it was all just so much that all he could do was give her a small nod of agreement.

“Hunter, put your arm around Willow.” Luz instructed as she looked at the positioning to try and get everyone in the shot.

“Yeah, Hunter put your arms around me,” Willow said dreamily as she used her hold on his bow tie to pull him even closer. Hunter felt transported, as though just being in her gaze made everything else around them melt. He had thought after his impulsive action she might look at him differently, but this was beyond his wildest dreams. Could it be that his impulsiveness was contagious? His hand cautiously hovered over her waist as he debated if he was indeed bold enough to put his arm around her. He felt like he was in a sauna as the sounds around them became muffled as he was overly aware of the sound of his heart beating. Or was it the sound of hers? He wasn’t sure if he technically had a heartbeat but whatever the case was as long as his eyes were on her everything was in slow motion again.

His eyes tried to spend equal time between her and the camera but there was a clear victor for his attention. “Have I told you how cute you look tonight?” Willow said with an airy giggle, deaf to the orders to smile and pay attention around her.

“Um hehe I-I don’t think so,” Hunter chuckled, his mouth dry.

“Well you do,” she giggled again, like it was some inside joke as she used her hold on his bowtie to keep him close. “Hunter, I wanted to tell you-.”

As Hunter turned his head to hear her better, he underestimated just how close they were and the movement caused their lips to touch unintentionally. Normally, that would be when Hunter melted into the floor or tried to vanish from existence, but even the small contact was enough to cause fireworks. That was when everything really stopped. It was nothing more than a peck, catching them both off guard, but there had never been a more happy accident.

She went down off her tiptoes slowly, both of them holding back any sign of a reaction until the other did. But there was no apology, nothing to be sorry for, nothing to regret, and once they both realized that they donned matching grins. They reentered reality together as the flash of the camera reminded them why they were here, and as their friends shouted their approval they also shouted out the themes of the poses they were supposed to be doing. Willow and Hunter got their bearings back and offered the camera a smile, which was not hard to do as they both couldn’t help but smile after what had just occurred. Another photo was taken and as the rest of the group moved and adjusted to do another pose, Hunter noticed his hand was still on Willow’s waist. Willow seemed to notice at the same time, and as her eyes found him again she was surprised to see he was already focused on her, or maybe he had never stopped.

Wordlessly they moved closer to each other until they realized they each possessed half of a magnet that was desperate to be kept together and found themselves in another kiss. This one was undoubtedly purposeful and not as sudden or quick as the first one. Willow’s arms went from holding his bow tie to drape around his shoulders taking a moment to plant lipstick marks all along his face. He saw the opportunity to use his hold on her waist to eagerly loft her off the ground, making a point to kiss her back. He wasn’t sure how he knew how, but he did and he felt like he could fly away as he felt her lips form a smile against his.

“Okay love birds, other people are waiting for the Photo Booth!”

It was like a record scratch as they stopped to remember where they were, eyes opening to come off whatever cloud they had been on as they faded back into reality once more. Willow leaned back to break the kiss, and Hunter couldn’t help but follow as though to savor the moment just a few moments more. She adjusted her glasses to better see the lipstick smudges she had left on his mouth and the side of his face paired with the goofy, awestruck look of disbelief.

“Sorry!” Willow giggled, as she looked around and realized the rest of their friends had left. “I guess we got carried away, huh?”

“Mhmhmhahaha,” Hunter squeaked in response, still trying to process that he was real and this was something that really happened to him in real life.

“Hunter, unless you wanna carry me out you’re gonna have to put me down,” Willow whispered.

“Oh yeah sorry yeah I can do that heh,” he said gently, setting her down. "We should uh, we should probably go.” He turned to leave but Willow caught his arm and pulled him out, so he left the correct way and didn’t re-enter the long line of other students waiting to take a photo.

“Well that’ll certainly be a photo for the scrapbook,” Willow laughed as she rested her head against his arm. They both felt that if they did not hold onto each other, they would float away. They knew the rest of the group was waiting for them by the bleachers ready to tease them, knowing from a distance they were at the ready with smirks of ‘About time’s and ‘I-told-you-so’s.

But Hunter was still lost in this impossible daydream beyond anything he thought possible. He couldn’t help but feel it had ended too soon, and now he truly had nothing standing in his way.

“Willow,” he began delicately as he cleared his throat, trying to seem calm and casual. “Would you want to uh, I-I mean if you could come with me, if you wanted to of course, outside where we could be alone, if you were okay with that, and I thought we could-.”

“Hunter and I are gonna go kiss in the hallway!” Willow announced giddily to the group as she redirected him to the door. His gaze darted between his friends and the wonderful girl who somehow read his mind, knowing thoughts he struggled to vocalize.

“Haha, whaaat? No, I mean that’s not.. I mean it’s not…” he realized it was pointless to try and hide his glee and as he allowed the dopey grin to overtake him as he embraced the moment and picked up the pace to follow her yet again and forever to no one’s surprise. “Heh, I’m Hunter.”

As they ran out the gym together, Hunter made sure to keep the door open behind them.

[sophieinwonderland]

Well, I went through all the trouble of typing a response and then they just block me before I can post... if only there was a tag I could post my response in... 🤔

You’re the ones who invaded our tags first,

That's pretty clearly not true if you've been paying attention to anything happening over the past several months on this site and anti-endos constantly posting hate in inclusive tags.

Not only do you take away system resources,

What resources? Be specific?

Terms? Because again, besides Plural as a term, fictives and factives were taken from the endogenic soulbonders. In reality, vast majority of system terms in circulation came from endogenic and pro-endo systems.

Maybe you mean resources like Pluralkit and Simply Plural. You know, that are made by the pro-endos. And get many of their donations from endogenic systems.

Or, I don't know... do you think the non-trauamgenic systems and non-disordered systems are seeking mental help from your trauma therapists? 🤣

Come on! Tell me the resources! Don't just use this as a buzzword!

Tell me, you have no actual medical professions claiming endogenics are real and we have many claiming they aren’t.

Oh? You do, do you? Can you name them? I can name mine!

Here's Dr. Eric Yarbrough...

That book, Transgender Mental Health, was actually reviewed and published by the American Psychiatric Association, by the way!

Of course, if you want the opinions of an expert in DID, there are these emails from Colin Ross!

Oh, but what does he know? He's just one of the foremost experts on DID with 40 years of experience.

How about brain scans? Here's Dr. Michael Lifshitz, psychiatry professor of McGill University discussing some of the findings from his $50,000 study into tulpa systems, sponsored by Stanford University, which showed neurological changes in tulpa systems while a tulpa was controlling their limbs.

To be fair, the results haven't been published yet, so maybe you can hold onto the hope that this professor with many published papers on his belt is lying about the results. That will be a fun hope to see crushed!

And I could go on... and on... I have a long list and this is just a taste of it.

But anyway, you were telling me how these "many" medical professionals are claiming endogenic systems aren't real. Can you name them for me? Even just one? Come on. If there are so many, it shouldn't be hard!

People like you groom actual systems into believing their trauma “wasn’t bad enough” so they think they’re endogenic

"Punk" to you is apparently using authoritarian right-wing queerphobic tactics of misusing the word "grooming" to make people associate the out group with child abusers. (See every right-winger accusing LGBT people of grooming kids to be gay or grooming them to be transgender.)

Not to mention you stole the term syshopping from RAMCOA survivors.

Nope. That's a lie.

System hopping, as a term for traveling between different bodied-systems, existed since at least as far back as 2005.

The RAMCOA association came from one RAMCOA system in 2021. The system who originally said that later said their words were taken out of context, deleted the original tweet, and condemned anti-endos for using their tweet to spread hate.

I've gone over this before with sources in the post below, thoroughly debunking this lie.

There is zero basis to this whatsoever.

Although you bringing this up and reminding me how anti-endos are trying to rewrite history to take this term too is only increasing my motivation for taking the systempunk and syspunk tags.

Not to fucking mention, you steal actual therapists from us by trying to make them believe in endogenic bullshit.

Wait!

I thought you said no medical professionals believed us!

Now we're stealing therapists by making them believe in endogenic systems?

Which is it??????

never touch the systempunk tag again

Nope! Sorry! Too late for that now!

Anti-science hate groups don't get safe spaces. And the fact that you've created an echo chamber where you can safely spread lies like the systemhopping libel above is only evidence that I need to make more of an effort to correct the lies of anti-endos at their source.

No Safe Space For Hate!

[thus-spoke-lo]

Are You Afraid of the Dark? // Usopp x gn!reader [feat. the Strawhat crew]

CW: none--just some silly, fluffy, mildly spooky fun with your crush Usopp WC: 2.4k // Fictober Masterlist

“It was a cold, dark night on a deserted island somewhere in the middle of uncharted ocean—an island that, come to think of it, was a lot like this one…”

And so begins a long and scary tale, told with boundless flourish and flawless acting by Usopp as you and the rest of the crew sit around the campfire, huddled close together in the chill night air. You had docked on the island with the intent to stay a night or two, hoping to explore the unknown topography and restock supplies with whatever you could find to tide you over until your next major stop; your task was to help Usopp identify some native flora and fauna that he could possibly use for his ammo. You were a little disappointed, however, when your attempts to cozy up with him and impress him with your extensive knowledge of poisonous plants (thanks to Chopper’s vast library) was met with only nervous chatter and him staying at least a few paces ahead of you at all times.

At least now, as he regales you all with another scary story of vengeful ghosts and spooky skeletons (much to Brook’s disapproval) you have an excuse to get close; it is awfully cold, after all, and Usopp just so happens to be sitting beside you—by your design. Every so often you scooch just a little closer, carefully avoiding his flailing arms as he lets out a monstrous growl, imitating the great beast that stalked him through the deep, dark woods, ducking as he mimes shooting at a looming specter with his slingshot to send it straight back to the hell from which it came.

It’s not until he finally takes what seems like his first breath of the evening between stories and reaches down to grab his canteen that he even notices you’re beside him, your thighs touching and your hand resting between your hips. Usopp’s eyes widen and he makes some babbled excuse that Luffy needs him to help with something (much to Luffy’s confusion) and quickly scrambles off, leaving you alone and a little bit confused.

“What was that about?” Sanji asks, sitting down next you and offering you a cup of something piping hot.

“I don’t know,” you shrug, sipping your beverage and settling your chin in your hand. “Guess something scared him.”

As the evening carries on and the fire begins to dwindle, you can’t help but still be crestfallen at Usopp’s rejection—you tried to be subtle, you tried to be sweet, you even tried to be a little bit snuggly, yet he still seemed shaken by the attention almost as much as you were by his tall tales. You start to clean up around the campfire, collecting errant cups and plates to bring to Sanji, when Nami taps your shoulder. “Hey, do you wanna go see if you can find some good branches and wood scraps? We could use some more to get us through ‘til morning.”

“Why can’t you send Zoro?” A chill runs down your spine at the thought of exploring the woods alone, and you feel pinpricks forming on your skin. “You know—since he has a sword?”

Nami gestures behind her; you glance over her shoulder to see Zoro reclining against a log, passed out and drooling, a few empty liquor bottles beside him and his swords nestled snugly in his arms. “That’s why.”

You shrug and let out a long, exaggerated sigh. “Fine. Can someone come with me though?”

“Why?” Nami’s eyes sparkle with a familiar deviousness you’ve come to fear. “Are you afraid of the dark or something?”

“No, of course not!” you quickly protest. You aren’t afraid of the dark—at least, not that afraid, you lie to yourself as you glance off into the inky blackness that surrounds the camp. It’s not your fault that some of Usopp’s stories were so vivid that they sent chills down your spine and goosebumps across your skin, no matter how much you were certain they were all just bluster. “It’s just, there could be anything out there! Besides, more hands mean I can carry more wood.”

“Honestly,” Nami says, rolling her eyes, “I don’t see why you can’t—”

“I’ll go with you!”

You both turn to see Usopp jogging towards you, bundled in a warm jacket, a lantern held in his hand.

“Oh, are you sure?” you ask hesitantly, recalling how distant he seemed earlier that day. “I wouldn’t want to burden you or anything. You know, since you were so busy helping Luffy with…whatever.”

“Of course I’m sure.” He places his hands on his hips and grins, ignoring your snide jab. “I mean, clearly my stories have you a little scared, the least I could do is accompany you.”

“I wasn’t scared of your goofy stories, Usopp,” you fib unconvincingly, trying to contain a shiver thinking about that one he told about the were-bears. “I could just use an extra hand is all.”

“Whatever you have to tell yourself, I guess,” he smirks.

You narrow your eyes—where did this brash Usopp suddenly come from, when only a short while ago he was slinking off into the dark corners of the camp, trotting away from your flirtatious gaze and your warm touch? Wherever he’d come from, you admittedly don’t mind—you’d rather not be alone in the darkness of the strange forest, and Nami seems insistent that you’re the only person deemed worthy of finding firewood. With a raise of your eyebrows and a shrug of your shoulders, you let Usopp take the lead and you traipse off past the clearing, into the darkened canopy just beyond.

It’s alarmingly hushed in the stillness of the forest, only the sounds of rustling leaves in the light breeze and the sound of your own heart pounding in your ears as you trudge through the undergrowth. Usopp silently holds up the lantern as you search for suitable sticks and twigs, tucking broken branches under your arm while he hums approvingly. As you bend down to pick up a particularly hefty piece of bark, a loud cracking noise from some distance away breaks the silence, and your head snaps to find the source of the sound.

“What was that?” The panic that immediately settles in your voice is almost palpable, and you chew on the side of your tongue trying to calm yourself.

Usopp turns and holds the light out in front of him, taking a few steps in either direction to peer through the trees. “Probably just a rabbit or something.”

Your back stiffens and you stand straight as another sound rings through the woods—heavy footfalls over crunching leaves, twigs snapping and vegetation being moved.

“Usopp, that sounds bigger than a rabbit,” you whisper through a shivering breath. There are certainly no were-bears—not to the best of your knowledge—but islands like these are notorious for being home to strange and unusual creatures of all shapes and sizes, and it seems as though one of them may have found you.

“Aw come on, I’m sure it’s nothing,” he teases, softly punching your upper arm. “Have you always been such a scaredy-cat?”

“What? I’m not a scaredy-cat!”

“Coulda fooled me.” He snickers and leans in close, holding the lantern up so you can see the smug grin that stretches across his lips. “What, are you afraid of the dark or something?”

“N-no, of course not!” you protest, your brow furrowed and your jaw jutting out. “I’m just trying to be careful, that’s all.”

“Well, no need to worry,” he says reassuringly, wrapping a hesitant arm around your shoulder. “You have the greatest sharpshooter in the world at your side to keep you safe. You just worry about finding firewood—I’ll take care of the rest.”

You feel assured, if only for the moment, and settle into the comfortable warmth of his arm around you, pulling you against him. The further you travel into the woods, the louder the sounds of something—or someone—following you grow louder and louder, and you cling to Usopp, dropping your armful of kindling altogether to grasp at the fabric of his jacket. Deep, guttural noises that sound like the call of something wild, something big, echo in the darkness, and a subtle green glow seems to illuminate the forest floor, dappled by the slivers of moonlight that manage to make it through the canopy.

Perhaps Usopp wasn’t lying about were-bears and other unsavory creatures after all, you think as a cacophony of thuds and bangs start to unnerve you, a crash and a boom like the felling of a tree—or two or three—hitting your ears. A low, haunting moan fills the air and suddenly it seems as though the whole forest is alive, creatures lurking just beyond the clearing where you and Usopp stand, a being that must be mystical or ghostly tinting the darkness in neon and calling out for something, a melancholy cry that chills you to the very marrow of your bones. Usopp keeps you close and hushes you, tells you to stay quiet, to keep your footfalls light—he would protect you, and the two of you would survive this hellish encounter to survive another day.

As you cling tightly to Usopp, arms wrapped around his firm torso, face buried in the fluffy collar of his jacket, you swear you hear a soft laugh that sounds familiar to you among the chaos and the terror that awaits you in the dense thicket. You still your quivering breaths and raise your head enough to hear more clearly, and lo and behold, there is it again: a telltale titter cutting through the discordance that can belong to only one person—or, sort-of person.

“I know that damned voice,” you murmur, breaking your embrace and walking towards the thick stand of trees as Usopp tugs at your wrist, his insistence to wait, to stay away from the trees lest a terrible tragedy occur falling on your disinterested ears. “Brook? Is that you?”

The booms and thuds come to an abrupt stop, and a soft “yo-ho” can be heard from just beyond the thick cluster of trees ahead. and Brook slowly pokes his head out from behind a large bush, waving weakly and mumbling “hey.”

You set your hands on your hips and shake your head, almost in tears from how utterly absurd you feel right now, having been bamboozled by your own friends. “Chopper, you can come out too. I know it’s you.”

“No, it’s not!” you hear in a small voice, quickly followed by “Aw, darn it.”

Brook and Chopper sheepishly walk into the clearing, both chuckling nervously as they start to talk over each other.

“It was Nami’s idea!” Chopper quickly blurts.

“It was his idea first!” Brook announces, pointing a long, bony finger in Usopp’s direction.

“Wow, selling me out that fast?” Usopp mutters under his breath, his eyes glued to the ground. “Thanks, guys, you’re real pals.”

You sigh and offer your crewmates a soft grin. “I’m not mad or anything—you both were very scary.”

“Really?” Chopper’s eyes light up and a blush dusts his furry cheeks. “Aw, come on, telling me that won’t make me happy or anything.”

“I think maybe it’s time you two went back to camp, don’t you think?” Usopp says through gritted teeth, glaring at them with raised eyebrows.

A chorus of “right” and “sure” and “of course” are nervously spoken into the air before the pair quickly scurry off back in the direction of your campsite. You dig the toe of your boot into the ground and sway back and forth, waiting for Usopp to say something, anything at all, but instead he stands with his hands in his pockets, seeming to find something very fascinating on the ground. He’s sweet like this, you think to yourself—brave, strong Usopp always seems to be reduced to awkward silence in your presence, whether you’re tagging along on a hike or stopping by his workshop to ask for help with a project of your own. It’s hard to be anything more than a little annoyed with him—there’s something he clearly wants from you, just as you do him, but he’s finding it impossible to say.

You walk towards him slowly, a pace fit to approach a nervous animal, acquiescing that perhaps it is you who needed to be the brave and strong one for a change. “Listen, Usopp, if you wanted to get close to me, you should’ve just said something.”

He crosses his arms over his chest and gives a small shrug. “I guess, I just didn’t know what to say.”

“Maybe something like ‘hey, do you wanna take a walk with me?’ Or ‘wow, look at this cool rock I found?’ Those would’ve totally worked.”

He quickly glances up at you. “Really?”

You smile and move closer, placing your hands on his arms. “Really. Try it.”

Usopp bristles at your touch, then stands up straight and puffs out his chest, taking a deep breath and clearing his throat. “So, uh…would you like to take a walk with me?”

“Why, how kind of you to ask.” You lean up and leave a chaste kiss on his cheek. “I would love to.”

A profound blush settles across his face and he grins so hard for a moment before composing himself that you think his jaw might be sore tomorrow. “Then let’s go.”

You take a few steps into the woods before you wrap your arm around his and pull yourself close, resting your face against his arm. He stiffens at first, a surprised noise pushing past his lips, but then settles, and he pulls you in close.

“Good thing you have me here to protect you, you know,” Usopp says, that familiar confident tone returning to his voice as the two of you saunter through the decaying leaves and soft moss beneath you. “These woods do seem like they’re pretty spooky.”

“Guess you better hold me close then,” you coo, and you can practically feel his body vibrating at your touch. “I am afraid of the dark, after all.”

[ask-artsy-oncie]

What’s Jules’ and Kit’s relationship from them first meeting onwards? Do they move in together at some point? How do they keep in contact? Stuff like that.

They exchange contact info after Jules is given a tour of the Sea Duck. I think it takes a little while for them to meet up, again, but they do. They're too fascinated by one another not to.

I think, though, if I want to explain how their relationship goes from one stage to the next, I ought to examine their social lives and how it impacts the development of their romance.

Kit's doing very good, now! In that, he has his family, he has Della (fuck canon, Kit and Della are childhood friends TO ME!!!), he has now former pirates he works with and can bond with, he goes out drinking every so often, like. I still consider him an introvert but he's got a pretty healthy social life and doesn't really struggle to have positive friendly interactions on the regular. He's just a generally good-natured guy like that.

HOWEVER, god, his romantic experience is weird. It's not like he never "noticed" girls or boys, but the vast majority of his focus growing up was on learning how to fly, getting into flight school, getting his pilot's license, etc. He just didn't have time for romance because he had other things at the forefront of his mind, and it took up a lot of his mind, too. I think it was something that gave Baloo great joy (in the sense that it meant that at least Kit "wasn't growing up too fast") and Rebecca a lot of anguish (in the sense that she had certain expectations for certain milestones at certain ages).

Into adulthood, maybe perhaps a little stunted from ignoring those kinds of feelings throughout his teen years, I don't think Kit really winds up in a serious relationship at any point prior to Jules. And I'm not even certain it's something he even cares to look for. He's very fulfilled by flying and cloudsurfing, among other things, yknow? I do think he ended up in short flings and even one-night-stands (he's still an adult with needs, and that's just how he went about dealing with it) throughout his 20's and early 30's, so he's not totally inexperienced in romantic endeavors, just not committed.

And he's also just fucking horrible at being self-aware about his attraction, as well. I've said this in a previous post but Kit develops crushes on pilots very easily. They don't last terribly long, but he's never aware of how obvious it is, or that much has even changed within him. Maybe after the fact, but rarely ever in the moment. His family absolutely teases him over it. Della is more exasperated by it.

Meanwhile, Jules has very little experience socializing outside their family. They'd always been the shy one among their siblings, and as they grew up they'd made one or two school friends (basically, they socialized just enough that their reclusive nature was never noticed, by their family or themself), but rarely ever got close enough to anyone like they were with their family.

They do, however, technically have a leg-up on Kit in that they did briefly date someone in a superficial high school sort of way. Lol.

Jules was just also pretty damn absorbed into their fixation on learning magic and magical history to really focus on maintaining friendships and other relationships after high school. Their siblings all grew up alongside them and got busy with their own lives. Jules gradually, without meaning to, became more and more reclusive. Stuck in their own head. Very painfully aware that they would like to form friendships and even romantic bonds at this point in their life, but totally intimidated by the process of doing so.

It's by chance that Kit makes the first move on that fateful day. And does so in a way that opens Jules up to him in a way they'd definitely struggle to without prompting. And they click pretty easily, it turns out.

Jules's proficiency is in magic, of course, but engineering and machinery really fascinates them. They genuinely were hanging off Kit's every word as he explained the mechanisms of the Sea Duck and compared them to those of other planes, what each part did and if and how it did it well. Meanwhile, Kit has had a pretty limited encounter with magic. In Talespin he's shown to be at least a little superstitious, and I, of course, have a very self-indulgent headcanon that he reads tarot, but he doesn't know the fine details, how or why things work the way they do. Actually seeing someone flying on an honest-to-god broomstick made his brain go "!!!!" and he absorbed Jule's long-winded, tangent-filled explanations with no complaints. Beyond just vibing with having related special interests, they're also both invested in the other's respected special interest.

It makes for a pretty great feedback loop, so when they do meet up, they tend to hit it off really well. Before Jules knows it, they've made their first friend in a long time. It happens without either of them really even noticing. It's suddenly just so normal to have one another in their lives. Suddenly, Jules is wedged into Kit's life, seamlessly, and Kit is wedged into Jules's. Kit is swinging by Jules's shop in his free time, just to see them, and hopefully goad them into having a conversation with him and giving him their attention, despite them being on the clock. Jules is starting to show up to Kit's shows when they can, and, with Molly's permission, ends up waiting backstage for him on the regular, hoping that they'll get to steal a moment or two of his time.

But Jules absolutely is having a very new experience after spending so long, alone. Whether they consciously realize it or not, they're pretty overwhelmed by this foreign feeling of having such a close companionship with someone, now. Not to mention that Kit is, physically, very attractive to Jules. What I'm saying is that Jules develops a crush on Kit pretty quickly. And once they notice they can't even bring themself to deny it when pried by one of their sisters.

They like Kit. A lot. But he's also the first friend they've had in so long, and the last thing they want to do is ruin that by letting romantic feelings get in the way. So they don't act on their feelings, which they feel is the smart, mature thing to do. They just want to be able to enjoy having a friend, right now (though it doesn't stop them from becoming a blushing, stuttering mess when Kit gets too close or grabs their hand and holds it, or, god forbid, some adventure perils cause Kit to pick them up. They have had to refrain from asking Kit to crush them SO MANY TIMES NOW--).

And Kit? Honestly was pretty smitten with them from the get-go, but again, he really isn't aware of it. He of course gets teased, he's so obvious about it, but he brushes it off with the same lighthearted comebacks as he always does with their teasing. Like he just does not make the connection. He just really, really, really enjoys being around Jules so he acts on those feelings and doesn't really put deeper thought into them...

... Until his crush ends up lasting so long that he inevitably comes to the realization that he has one, while he's still having one. Uh oh. Kit ends up entering a sort of crisis mode where he's suddenly hyper aware of his feelings for Jules and can't behave normally (or rather, calmly) around them anymore. He gets too jittery, too blushy, too dumb around them, now, and it's making him frustrated with himself. Meanwhile, Jules repressing their own attraction to Kit is starting to get kind of painful for them. There's romantic tension between the two of them that is just begging to pop at any given moment. Their loved ones are way too invested in this repressive disaster unfolding before them, btw. Things are super awkward between them now, despite their best efforts, but they're also attached enough to each other that it doesn't stop them from spending time with one another.

And, see, Jules has a pretty bad habit of talking aloud to themself. It's a holdover from only really having themself to talk to when there wasn't a customer to be helped. They're not loud about it, but they're definitely audible. And they're in turmoil at this moment, so they're definitely talking to themself every chance they get.

Despite their own self-awareness, Jules does not actually recognize that Kit reciprocates their feelings. They believe that things are getting more and more awkward because, in bottling up their feelings, they believe said feelings have gotten "worse" and are putting the strain on their friendship they feared it would. So their next step is just to convince themself to get over their feelings. To cross the peak of this awful mountain they've been climbing, already. That this isn't going to last much longer, that it's just their physical attraction to Kit messing with the rest of their feelings and it'll go away. That, sure, maybe right now they're in love with Kit and extremely attracted to Kit, and--

The door to their shop is open.

Kit is standing in their doorway.

As Kit still does, in order to suffer through incomprehensible sentences and blush so uncomfortably hot, just so he can hear Jules's voice and see their smile and be with them, with their attention on him.

He's probably heard to much.

He has heard to much.

The tension pops like a bubble.

And it really is such a drastic relief to the both of them that, all this time, they were just being idiots and there really wasn't much of anything to worry about. They're adults, dammit, they shouldn't have to dance around one another, if they both like each other romantically they should just give this dating thing a shot, right? The two of them think so.

And so they end up in a sort of honeymoon phase, where they're still extremely reactive towards one another. Blushing, stuttering, babbling, awkward messes. But it isn't painful for either of them, anymore. It just makes them feel warm and happy and giggly, until everything calms down properly and they settle back into their familiar familiarity. They're just both friends AND lovers, now.

I'm gonna stop it there because it's past 1AM and I am extremely tired, but this is them going from acquaintances to friends to a couple, at least. If I was more coherent I'd probably have a better narrative structure to this? But maybe I'm just being too harsh on myself. If this satisfies you, anon, then I'm very happy :)

[mnstcrbnll]

"ONE LAST TIME, WELCOME BACK TO SECRETS FROM THE STARS!!

Eleven stellar contestants wanted to give it another shot and discover the secrets remaining... and while some did amazing, some others... not so much~!

Now, first of all, time to spoil who sent those last few secrets... and then we'll go ahead and see who got the golden star... and who ended up at rock bottom!

" i still like a guy who cheated on me and broke my heart and idk what to do about it. i know i shouldn't be. i think i need some advice." was STRELITZIA'S SECRET, and half of our contestants guessed correctly! Let's hope someone will give her some advice after all!

"killed a man by adding 4x the spice to a chili. he never recovered." was BRUTO'S SECRET, and while the majority guessed right, plenty thought it could've been Anzu's, Lyra's or Molayne's secret as well. Guess nobody is a good cook, here!

"I ACCIDENTALLY CAUSED THE GREAT SUNNYSHORE CITY BLACKOUT AND NOBODY KNOWS. I CRASHED MY BIKE AGAINST A BIG ELECTRIC PANNEL AND RAN AWAY." was WILLOW'S SECRET, and with my surprise a vast majority thought it belonged to Mable! And while I'm at it, I want to remind our stellar audience to go visit Eternara's Rickshaw & Daughter's for all your biking needs!

" I once broke a thunderstone earing my classmate lent to me by chewing on it." was LYRA'S SECRET, and people equally guessed her and Molayne! We'll have to gift them both some high quality earrings!

" I have had done something naughty in the break room or my place of work " was MOLAYNE'S SECRET, but the majority guessed Bruto! My oh my, sooo spicy~!

"I have horrible Phasmophobia, but ghosts seem to love me anyway." was RIKA'S SECRET! She got the majority of votes, but that seemed to throw off a lot of people too!

"I've been trying to get back into drawing fanart of my favorite childhood book series, PokeMorphs. I even had a PokeMorph-sona back then, who was a Stantler, and I'm trying to redraw her. Who knows, maybe I'll have her evolve into a Wydeer or something" was MABLE'S SECRET, and much to my surprise, while the majority guessed her, just as many people thought it was Rika's secret! Maybe you too should meet for some fanfiction ideas!

Now now now, the moment you've been waiting for! Last time, Riley ( @auraguardians ) was on top... but this test put everyone in a very rough spot, making someone even go under ZERO STARS! In fact, at the very last place, with MINUS THREE AND A HALF STARS, Volkner ( @low-charge )!! But fear not, someone did way worse: in fact, GRUSHA ( @crushed-ice ) he decided to go ahead and threaten your galactic host on camera and we decided to give a little malus ♥ This means that, at the end of the day, with MINUS FOUR, Grusha loses! ♥

But, now, to see who became our new STELLAR GOSSIPER... with NINE STARS after she guessed every single secret of round 2 correctly, and after she oh-so-boldly went ahead and sent her guess for the first one barely five minutes after the start of our show

WILLOW ( @soardived ) IS THE WINNER OF THIS ROUND OF SECRETS FROM THE STARS!!!

For that, she's allowed to recieve... ONE WISH! Nothing too big, of course, we don't give out Mythical Pokèmon and potions of eternal youth... but after spreading your dirty laundry, the least you could ask for in return is a first class ticket, right?"

cue canned laugh

"Congratulations to all partecipants, and I wish you all a STELLAR EVENING!"

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

"Truth crushed to the ground will rise again." April 11, 2023

Robert B. Hubbell

         The Nashville City Council voted to re-appoint Justin Jones to the Tennessee legislature after Republicans expelled Jones and Justin Pearson for demonstrating in the well of the assembly. The victory is a small but significant sign that MAGA extremism has crested because of its self-limiting flaw: A political philosophy based on hate, exclusion, and vilification of "others" will drive away people of goodwill who seek to live in peace, security, and safety—the vast majority of Americans. Although we cannot relent in our resistance to MAGA extremism, we can take hope from the fact that the disease is following the natural course of all infections. It is diminishing, slowly and incrementally, but diminishing, nonetheless.  

         Although Tennessee Republicans could have refused to seat Justin Jones when he walked triumphantly into the Tennessee assembly on Monday afternoon, they dared not compound their earlier mistake. They were chastened and defeated, embarrassed (silently) that their condescension and hateful words lecturing two Black leaders were seen across the world. Legislators who were recognizable only in small parts of Tennessee before last week are now recognized by hundreds of millions across the globe as the face of the old South—and the ugliness it stands for. Justin Jones was triumphant. The people were triumphant. Democracy was triumphant.

         We should savor the joy of Jones's victory, but we cannot deceive ourselves about the path ahead. Tennessee Republicans have learned a lesson—they cannot be explicit in exercising racial animus to achieve anti-democratic means. They will return to the shadows of backrooms and private clubs, but it is too late. They have been exposed, and the eyes of the world are upon them.

         When Justin Jones returned to the Tennessee assembly floor, he delivered an uplifting speech in which he thanked Republicans in the chamber for reminding his generation of fundamental truths:

I want to thank you all for awakening the people of this state . . . particularly the young people. For reminding us that truth crushed to the ground will rise again. That what you intend for evil can be used for good. That the abuse of this body will not happen in the comfort of silence. That the struggle for justice is fought and won in every generation.

         A national leader has emerged from a failed attack on democracy in Tennessee. Jones's speech upon his re-admittance to the assembly is here (Justin Jones 4/10/23 speech starting at the 45 second mark). Jones's speech is well worth watching in its entirety and will bolster your confidence about the future of our democracy—if it is in the hands of young leaders like Justin Jones.

Tampa Bay Times publishes a damning report saying that Florida omitted important data from report on the risk of myocarditis.

         What I am about to relate is an important story that deserves far more attention than it is getting in the popular press. The story requires moderate attention to detail—which I hope you will give it. In the end, it shows that Ron DeSantis issued reckless advice to young men to avoid taking the mRNA vaccine because of an alleged heightened risk of a heart infection (myocarditis). It turns out that the report issued by DeSantis's hand-picked Surgeon General failed to include data and findings that flatly contradicted the guidance issued by DeSantis. Now that the report has been discredited, DeSantis has done nothing to reverse his prior erroneous guidance.

         DeSantis appointed Joseph Ladapo as Florida Surgeon General. It was a curious choice during a pandemic because Ladapo was an anti-masker who wouldn't say in his confirmation hearings if he had received a Covid vaccine. Months after his confirmation, Ladapo produced a non-peer-reviewed report that listed no authors that came to the startling conclusion that the mRNA vaccine caused a significant increase in the risk of myocarditis in young men. DeSantis brandished the report as vindication for his evolving anti-vaccine stance and urged young men not to get vaccinated.

         The report was widely criticized at the time it was published because it did not provide critical information about the details of the study. In the absence of those details, it was impossible for other scientists to evaluate the validity of the report's conclusions. Although it took a while, the Tampa Bay Times obtained the underlying information and drafts of the report before its final publication.

         In short, the Tampa Bay Times discovered that the report omitted significant data that completely contradicted the finding of the study as represented by Ladapo. See Tampa Bay Times, Florida health officials removed key data from COVID vaccine report.

         The Tampa Bay Times described the significance of the omitted data as follows:

[T]he data on the risk of infection omitted from the published report shows that catching COVID presents a far greater risk for that same age group.

For Floridians ages 18 to 24, the incidence of cardiac-related deaths from infection was more than ten times higher than from the vaccine and more than five times higher for ages 25 to 39. That data was not broken down by sex.

The state epidemiologists who worked on the report also arrived at a different conclusion than Ladapo, the drafts suggest.

"The risk associated with COVID-19 infection clearly outweighs any potential risks associated with mRNA vaccination," one version states.

"The small risk associated with mRNA vaccination should be balanced against the much larger risk associated with COVID-19 infection," another version says.

         If the information in the Tampa Bay Times is correct, it suggests potential scientific fraud that would alarm any normal governor who urged his constituents not be vaccinated against a deadly disease. But DeSantis hasn't addressed the issue and won't unless he is pressed by reporters. If it is true that Florida purposefully omitted critical information that contradicted DeSantis's political narrative and medical guidance to Floridians, someone should be conducting a criminal investigation. Tell a friend.

The mass shooting in Louisville, Kentucky.        

         A mass killer assaulted and killed former co-workers in Louisville, Kentucky on Monday. Four employees were killed and eight were injured (including one Louisville police officer). See WaPo, Louisville bank shooting leaves 5 dead, 8 wounded. Like the recent shooting in Nashville, the state's governor was close friends with one of those killed in the shooting. Governor Andy Beshear held back tears as he described the death of a life-long mentor and confidant. In Tennessee, Governor Bill Lee's wife was scheduled to have dinner with a teacher on the day she was killed in the Nashville mass shooting.

         There are more than 400 million firearms in America, and they are being freed of regulation at a rapid pace. Although I am not a statistician, it seems inevitable that more guns plus less regulation will result in more gun crime and more gun deaths. And, statistically, those gun deaths will touch the lives of political leaders who spend most of their time engaged in policy debates about gun policy. But losing a friend, mentor, confidant, or child is not about policy. It is personal.

         It seems incontestable that there is some level of death in a mass killing that would coalesce the competing parties to set aside their policy differences and act to protect Americans. Let's hope that we do not need to wait for an event so horrific that overwhelms the deaths of innocents we witness on a regular basis. Republican Governor Bill Lee and Democratic Governor Andy Beshear now share an uncommon bond: they have lost close friends in mass killings. Perhaps they can find a way to start a conversation around their shared grief.

Drug companies enter the debate on mifepristone.  

         The ruling of Judge Kacsmaryk repealing FDA approval of mifepristone was a legal first. A single judge overruled the scientific conclusions of the FDA regarding the safety and effectiveness of an FDA-approved drug. The record before Judge Kacsmaryk consisted of junk science peddled by religious zealots and provided no valid basis for second-guessing the FDA's conclusions. But Kacsmaryk didn't care; he just needed a record, no matter how sloppy or outlandish or falsified upon which to base his order banning mifepristone. He is betting that it will take years to unwind his ruling and cull through the scientific garbage on which it stands.

         The ability of the single federal judge to overrule the FDA's conclusions regarding the safety and efficacy of an approved drug grabbed the attention of the pharmaceutical manufacturers. They invest billions in research, development, and marketing, all predicated on the assumption that FDA approval will mark the end of the drug approval process—not mark the start a campaign of religiously motivated litigation before a captive judge in Texas.

More than 400 representatives of drug manufacturers have signed a letter protesting Judge Kacsmayrk’s decision. The remarkable letter is here: In support of FDA's authority to regulate drugs. It deserves to be read in full, although it says in part:

On Friday, April 7, a judge with no scientific training fundamentally undermined the bipartisan authority granted by Congress to the Food & Drug Administration to approve and regulate safe, effective medicines for all Americans.

If courts can overturn drug approvals without regard for science or evidence, or for the complexity required to fully vet the safety and efficacy of new drugs, any medicine is at risk for the same outcome as mifepristone.

         Kacsmaryk's ruling is equally atrocious on questions of law. On that front, I again recommend the analysis of Mark Joseph Stern in Slate, The Lawless Ruling Against the Abortion Pill Has Already Prompted a Constitutional Crisis. More on that topic in future editions of the newsletter.

Robert B. Hubbell Newsletter

[smile-files]

clover is ace, full stop. i think she's then arospec in some way, like i see it that she has minor crushes on people but has no desire to date said people. like clover's the kind of person to get a crush on some random person they meet once or somebody they see on the subway and they'll think about that person a lot - like oh this person is so cool and pretty and golly gee whiz! - but only briefly. she likes the feeling of having a crush on somebody but can just turn it off like a light switch if she feels like it

[hmslusitania]

“Wait, wait, what?” Buck asks, jaw falling loose over the green beans.

“Oh, yeah, no it was bad,” Ravi says.

“I’m — I threatened you with a chainsaw!” Buck says.

“I mean it started before that,” Ravi says. Beside them at the table, Hen is snickering into her glass of wine, apparently already well aware of Ravi’s former crush on Buck.

Across from her, directly beside Buck, Eddie’s grip on his silverware is getting tighter, and he’s cutting the turkey of Bobby and Athena’s thanksgiving dinner into smaller and smaller pieces without unclenching his jaw enough to take a bite.

“I’m — why?” Buck demands.

“I dunno,” Ravi says with a shrug, eating another Brussels sprout. “You’re hot and competent, and like, maybe you weren’t always super nice to me but you were always so kind, especially to patients on calls.”

Ravi shrugs again.

“You’re easy to love, Buck,” Eddie says, terse and pointed at the cranberry sauce.

“Whoa, hey, no, I didn’t say anything about love,” Ravi says. “It was just a crush.”

“No, for sure, obviously,” Buck says. He clears his throat, a little pink around the ears. “And that is — very reasonable and flattering of you.”

“You’re kind and generous and your heart is solid gold,” Eddie continues like neither Ravi nor Buck had said anything else. He punctuates each description with a fork stab to a vegetable on his plate. “And this is thanksgiving, right, you’re supposed to say what you’re thankful for? I’m thankful for you every single day I’m still breathing.”

Ravi and Hen stare at him, silent in shock. Eddie stabs and then mushes a roast potato. Buck blinks at him in utter and complete incomprehension.

“What,” Buck says finally.

“Crushes are fine and fun and whatever but Ive been in love with you for years and I’m so tired of pretending not to be,” Eddie says, finally dropping his fork and picking up his wine glass. He doesn’t take a sip, he just holds it.

“I’m — Eddie, I — of course I love you too,” Buck says. He beams, and Eddie’s hand relaxes on his glass, the tension seeping out of his jaw.

“You do?” Eddie asks quietly.

“Yes, Eddie, oh my god, yes, I love you so much,” Buck says, and Eddie smiles for the first time since this conversation took this turn.

Beside him, Hen squeezes Ravi’s arm in clear delight. Buck and Eddie have eyes only for each other.

“So, does this mean you guys are gonna renew your vows?” Ravi asks, mostly to keep them from making out at the dinner table while the vast majority of their department is in attendance. “I suppose you’d probably want to get new rings, right, since the old ones would be a reminder of the time your marriage didn’t work out.”

That statement snaps Buck and Eddie out of their soul-gazing, and then draws Hen’s attention to him as well.

As one, the three of them stare at Ravi and ask, “what?”

[sinnersandsaints-linwrites]

A little crossover between Sage & Morien (from @the-kingshound ) because I couldn't resist <3

They observed the physician for a while, now. Blended into the background, away from prying eyes, they slowly got to know them. Learned how they breathe, how their expression changes, and how their gaze becomes hollow when the painful memories start to crawl back onto the surface of their mind.

They felt a string of familiarity—understanding—between themself and Morien. The need to be burned alive, inside out, the crushing weight of the sins on their shoulders, and the ghosts bleeding from the past into the present.

They revealed themself, of course. ‘Sage’ is the name they gave to Morien; Sage from Nowhere, subordinate of No One, a shadow with no history. 

Slowly, a relationship formed. A peculiar one, based on quick-witted banter; every conversation between them was a dance around double-meanings and carefully chosen words, with occasional boldness from Morien.

Sage found themself addicted to this, very quickly.

“There are more creative ways to self-destruct, I’m sure you’re aware,” their voice echoed in the chambers, sweet like honey. “Alcohol is the most boring of all, truly. You could be more creative,” they note, looking down at the drinking physician. 

They did not judge, of course. They never did, despite the evidence to the contrary. Hell knows Sage made worse decisions, that would warrant disappointed glares and judgemental stares. 

Morien didn’t seem too keen on Sage’s company, however. Granted, they were drinking. It was hard to take anything they’ve said to heart.

“You are worse than the castle rats, coming back in the worst moments to bite my ankles.” Sage chuckled at that. The vast majority of people feared them. They felt the primal urge to run away from Sage, like a mouse eyed by a hungry snake. Not Morien, though. Sage didn’t know if it’s a sign of bravery, stupidity, or both. 

Or perhaps, they did not care. Perhaps danger felt more comfortable than peace—maybe the familiarity of it was a refreshing change for them. 

Sage tilted their head. “Ah, but if I stopped coming back, would you not miss me?” Their lips curled into a smile. There was a note of danger behind it, so subtle most people wouldn’t notice it. 

Morien laughed, surprising them once again. “I would. It’s what scares me. I’m becoming dependant on your visits.” Sage’s heart shudders in their chest—something they have not felt in a long time. It was invigorating to feel such power, to have someone admit that they have it. It was a drug like no other.

Then again, did were they not the same? Longing for the next conversation with the King’s physician, the subtle intimacy between them as Sage fixed Morien’s collar, moved a stray, auburn hair from their face. Morien made them weak and starved for something so mundane—it was terrifying and exciting at the same time.

Sage moved towards Morien like a cat, light on their feet, the phantom pain buried underneath the avalanche of emotions that fought inside them.

Keeping their face mere inches away from Morien’s, their piercing gaze studied the smallest details of the physician’s expression. 

“You make the worst choices, my dear songbird,” they purred, “I think I might keep you.”

[xaibaugrove]

Addressing the Casual (and Direct) Biphobia in the Korrasami Community

So this will either get a lot of flak or fade into obscurity. I am a member of the Korrasami community who has not been here for nearly as long as the more notable members and I am not very active to say the least. But this platform gives me the ability to speak my mind and after letting this topic fester within me for as long as I’ve been in this community, I am going to speak my damn mind because this shit needs to be said.

The Backstory

I won’t bore anyone with my whole confused bisexual life story, because this isn’t about me. But just for some background here, I was a confused bisexual for my entire life until Korra and Asami basking in the light of the Spirit Portal made me see the actual light and recognize my sexuality. Which was a little crazy for me to realize that, yeah, there is a way to be attracted to men and still be attracted to women.

I saw so much of myself in Korra. She was super awkward around guys she thought were cute, she was buff, she was tough and sometimes she just blurted out all her deep seated feelings towards guys she just met and you know, I felt that. She also fell in love with her female best friend and I felt that, too. Naturally after rewatching the series as an adult, I wanted to see if there were others out there who appreciated this couple as much as I did.

The Issue

While I found a vast online community that had as much love for Korrasami as I did, I quickly found that there were a large majority of lesbian/WLW fans who didn’t have as much love for Korra and Asami’s very real attraction to Mako. 

Take a look at the Korrasami AO3 tag. I’ve actually had someone tell me that no one who reads Korrasami fanfic wants to read anything featuring Korra or Asami with Mako. I’ve seen fics that have a timeline that starts with both women being toddlers growing up into adults without one single mention of them being attracted to boys or men at all, nonetheless attracted to Mako. And in the rare scenario that a relationship with Mako or any male is mentioned, then comes the frustrating storybeat that they either dated men because they were too shy/scared to approach each other (thus rendering the men as just things to do in the meantime) or worse yet, because they were CONFUSED OR CONFORMING TO SOCIAL/GENDER NORMS.

In the 3 or 4 years I’ve been part of the fandom, I’ve had actual conversations with lesbian friends who have found every way possible to wave away Korra and Asami’s attraction to Mako. Or even reacting in disgust to Makorra or Masami at every mention of it. Which is fair, if you’re a KA fan of course that’s an expected reaction to another ship involving your OTP but, to completely dismiss the importance of it...? There are those who would call those parts of the series “pointless” or “ridiculous”. It’s really disheartening to know that a lot of lesbian KA fans consider the queer rep in the series soured by the 2 seasons where they had to watch Korra and Asami, two bi women, be attracted to a man.

It was jarring to say the least, to have conversations with friends where I couldn’t bring up Korra or Asami’s relationships with Mako during discussions about their development without being shot down and having the relationships be dismissed. The reaction to Korra and Asami’s attraction to men was so strong that I even started to feel ashamed about how “frivolous” or “trivial” my own attraction to men was perceived. 

Not too long ago, I saw a meme on Reddit that sent me over the edge and inspired me to write this post. The user has since deleted the post, but I remember it very vividly, only because I’ve seen some version of it many times before. The meme basically referred to how frustrated the viewer had been after being told that TLOK had great queer rep, but feeling as though they were cheated having to watch them “fuck around with guys for 2 seasons” (their words), only to be saved at the end, when Korra and Asami finally get together.

When I saw it, I was immediately fuming. Because at that point, I had seen this shit so much, it hurt more than anything else. And the pain mixed with the rage but...I think the pain still comes through in my reply to the post. 

I’ve seen sooo much content and sooo many posts or comments where a user asks whether TLOK has good LGBTQ+ rep, only to have someone reply that it’s a letdown because the queer rep doesn’t happen until the finale. Another all too common discussion I’ve seen is where fans call Korra and Asam’s bisexuality into question. One example 

I understand that it sucks that we didn’t get more romantic interactions between the two women during the show for external reasons outside the creators’ control. I wish there had been a kiss here, more blushes there. But the crushes on Mako were real. And their interest in each other, albeit all too short in its depiction, is also real. And that means something to me, a bisexual woman. To say the rep is a letdown is...sad. Because Korra is featured in every episode starting from the first and Asami is featured in every ep from the 4th or 5th episode. And they’re both wonderfully, beautifully bisexual. Seeing that mattered to me. 

So, to anyone who is a lesbian or WLW and a Korrasami fan and you’re reading this post and feel attacked, just stop instead to examine your language within the fandom. I understand you want “pure” WLW content or whatever... but just stop making me feel ashamed for being a wlw who is also attracted to men... and please stop erasing that attraction from two of the few bisexual characters I have that are like me... I’m tired, so tired of having to defend my attraction to both sexes with people outside the LGBTQ+ community and those within it. 

[lilliagradiewrites]

surprise? (jj maybank)

Summary: You’re John B’s sister, and you’ve been dating JJ in secret for months. What happens when John B sees a hickey on your neck, and realizes his best friend has been making on his little sister?

WC: 2.7k

WARNINGS: Hickey/ mentions of sexy time, cursing, mentions of violence

A/N: Another JJ one shot! This one has been sitting half-finished in my collection for a while now, so tonight I decided to complete it! I’m such a sucker for a brother’s best friend moment, so I knew I had to write a JJ x Routledge! reader fic. i hope you all like it!

PS: Thank you so much for all the love on evermore, my last fic!! It was so well received, and has gotten more recognition than anything else I've ever uploaded. I’m so thankful!!

I love you all so so much, and I hope you enjoy!!

LET’S DO IT!

~~~~~~

Neither you nor JJ could pinpoint the exact moment it began.

Being John B’s younger sister, you had known the blonde boy for basically your entire life. In seventh grade, you had developed a slight crush on JJ. He was the older, popular boy that cracked funny jokes; how could you not like him? You had always thought he was cute, but you started seeing him in a different light around the age of twelve.

The crush quickly faded away, and you found yourself with many boyfriends and flings over the years. Looking back on it now, you don’t think your feelings JJ ever truly went away… you had just forced yourself to forget them.

For JJ, the feelings developed around his sophomore year, when you were a freshman. For the vast majority of his life, he’d seen you every day when he inevitably made his way to the chateau. He’d cared about you, of course, but no more than a ‘I care about her because she’s my best friends little sister’ kind of way.

He has a vivid memory of you, the morning after he’d had a sleepover with your brother. He was sitting on the couch with John B, having a conversation about some stupid guy thing he couldn’t even recall now. He remembers seeing you walk out of your room, having just woken up, wearing an oversized t-shirt. Your hair was in a messy bun, and you didn��t have on any makeup.

He couldn’t explain why, but you looked so damn beautiful to him that day. You never noticed him staring at you, but John B did. JJ remembers his friend’s brows furrowing.

“What the hell are you staring at?” After following JJ’s gaze, his eyes widened. “Are you looking at my sister, man? Cut that shit out.”

“No, of course I wasn’t. I was looking out the window. Chill, bro.” JJ had quickly denied the claims of his friend, who didn’t entirely believe him but chose not to say anything else on the topic. After that day, JJ tried his best to avoid staring at you, but it was always hard for him.

Within a month after that incident, you began hanging out with the Pogues more and more. They quickly became your best friends, and you loved them all more than anything. They all helped you and John B through the disappearance of your father, and you were eternally grateful.

Naturally, you found yourself growing the closest with Kie. Being the only two girls, it made the most sense for the two of you to be very close. Kiara was like a sister and a best friend all in one, and you loved her very much.

Pope was always great. He kept you and the rest of the pogues in check, making sure you remained safe and made smart decisions. John B, of course, was your older brother, and you were very close with him. You had your frustrations with the brunette, however. One thing that always pissed you off about John B was how insanely protective he was. He would threaten any guy whose eyes lingered too long on you at a party, and it took years of convincing to allow him to let you go on a date. You loved him, of course, and knew he was always trying to keep you safe, but you couldn’t help but be frustrated with him sometimes.

And then there was JJ. You didn’t even know what to think when it comes to the blonde boy. You had always noticed something special about him, and felt slightly different towards JJ then all the other boys. For some reason, the both of you kept your distance from each other. Maybe, you both knew in the back of your mind that if you got too close, there’d be no pulling you apart.

One night at a party, you had gotten absolutely wasted. Kiara had gone home with some girl, Pope’s dad didn’t let him come, and John B was nowhere in sight, meaning it was up to JJ to take care of you. He brought you home, cleaned you up, and put you into bed. In your intoxicated state, you let your walls fall down. You told Jj how you felt about him, too drunk to worry about the consequences.

Fortunately for you, the feelings were reciprocated. JJ said that he felt the same way, and he’d been keeping his distance from you because of strict commands from John B. “Anytime I’d get close to you, or even be ‘too friendly’ towards you, I’d get the whole ‘my sister is off limits’ lecture, I was tired of hearing it, and I didn’t think you felt the same anyways.”

That night was the beginning of a long journey. He kissed you, and you were happier than you’d ever been. He ask you to be his girlfriend, and you happily said yes. There was only one issue with the whole situation.

Your stupid, overdramatic, overprotective brother.

“Maybe we shouldn’t tell him for a while?” Jj suggested after much contemplation on both of your parts. “See where this goes. If it gets super serious, we’ll obviously tell him, but it’s probably best to keep it on the down low for now.”

Though hesitant, you eventually agreed, deciding it was the best decision for now. You hated lying to your brother, but it’s not like you had any other choice.

Six months passed after that night. You and JJ’s relationship grew stronger and more serious with each passing day, but neither of you had the guts to tell your brother. So, you kept dating in secret, the relationship only between the two of you.

Oh, right. And Kie.

JJ had gotten into a habit of sneaking into your bedroom window late at night. He rarely got any time with just the two of you, and even when you hung out with your friends, he wasn’t able to be as affectionate as he wished he could be. One morning, Kiara arrived at the chateau earlier than usual, bursting into your room to find you asleep, wrapped in your boyfriend's arms.

The brunette woke the two of you up with a loud exclamation of “What the fuck?”

JJ kissed you goodbye and scrambled out the window before John B heard anything, and you sat Kie down and explained the whole situation, making her promise not to tell anyone.

Especially not John B.

Kiara, being the amazing person she is, swore secrecy and squealed about how happy she was for the two of you.

Kie’s knowledge of the relationship is part of the reason she insists on waking you up one morning at the chateau. She and Pope had stayed the night, as well as JJ. JJ was nowhere to be found, but the group just assumed that he had run home to grab spare clothes or something.

Well, the boys assumed that.

Kie knew better.

Her suspicions were completely confirmed when she entered your room to find you and JJ cuddled together, just like all those months ago when she had first found out.

“Wake up, guys! JB and Pope are awake. JJ, hop out the window and pretend you went to get clothes from your house. You don’t have a lot of time.”

Immediately, you and your boyfriend were launching up out of the bed. He followed his usual routine of kissing you goodbye and then jumping out of the window. You thanked Kie before beginning to search for your swimsuit.

“You’re welcome, babes. And by the way, I’d make sure to cover up that fatass hickey on your neck before walking out of this room.”

Kie gives you a wink before walking out of the room and closing the door, leaving you there with red cheeks and wide eyes.

You moved immediately to your mirror, and examined the left side of your neck. Sure enough, there it was: a large bruise that JJ had taken his sweet time on the night before. You huffed, recalling when he was giving it to you.

“JJ, don’t.” You breathed, lightly pushing him off you. “You can’t leave marks, everyone will see.”

“Let them see.” He lifted his lips off your neck to look you in the eyes. “I’m tired of hiding that you’re mine. I want everyone to know that you’re taken, by me. Let them see, babe, I don’t care.”

For a moment, he had you agreeing with him. Who cares if everyone finds out? They’d just find out eventually anyways. What’s the difference if they find out sooner rather than later?

But, you eventually cam to your senses. “I’m tired of hiding too, J. We’ll tell them soon, but I don’t want my brother to find out I’m with his best friend by seeing the hickey his best friend gave me.”

JJ paused his movements for the second time, breathing and thinking for a moment. “Yeah, I guess you're right.” He bites your earlobe, then leans in to whisper in your ear.

“I’ll make it small. I still want my mark on you.”

Clearly, JJ had lied. The bruise on your neck was absolutely massive, and you’d have your work cut out for you when it came to covering it up. Sighing, you reached for your makeup bag, pulling out some color corrector and concealer.

A good thirty minutes later, the bruise was covered enough to go unnoticed, and you were outside on the dock, dressed in a pink swimsuit and a pair of shorts. John B and Pope were on the boat, preparing it for you day on the water. Kie was inside shoving snacks, water bottles, and beer into a small cooler. JJ, who had just finished rolling a few blunts, came walking out of the house. You heard him approaching behind you, and whipped around to face him.

“I have a bone to pick with you, Maybank.” You glared, crossing your arms over your chest. Your boyfriend looked nervous, his smiling face immediately shifting to a concerned one.

“What’s wrong, babe?” He said quietly, making sure that the other pogues were out of earshot before using the nickname. JJ knew you well, and any term of endearment made you melt for him. He always used them, but was particularly heavy on the nicknames when you were upset with him.

“Last night, I told you not to leave marks. But you insisted, and you told me you’d leave a small one.”

“Yes, that happened. So why are you upset with me?”

“Because the hickey I woke up to this morning was anything but small. It took me twenty minutes and half my concealer to cover that shit up! Are you fucking crazy? Are you trying to get us caught?”

JJ moved towards you, probably to take you in his arms, but caught himself just before he did it, glancing up at the boys on the boat.

“I’m sorry, love. I couldn’t help myself. You look so fucking hot with my marks on your neck. It’s too hard to resist. Believe me, I tried.”

“Then try fucking harder, Maybank! Do I need to remind you that your ass is on the line here, way more than mine? Birdie’s not gonna beat my ass if he finds a hickey on my neck, he’s gonna beat yours! And then I get to have a screaming match with my brother after patching you up in the bathroom. I don’t know about you, but that is not the way I want anybody to find out about our relationship.”

JJ opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again with a sigh. He knew you were right.

“You’re right, baby. I’m sorry. I need to gain better self control. It won’t happen again, I’ll listen to you next time. I’m sorry angel, really. Forgive me?”

He was giving you those puppy dog eyes that he knew you couldn’t resist. After a moment of staring into them, you finally gave in. “yes, bebs, I forgive you. But don’t do that shit again, or so help me God…”

Your boyfriend broke out in an ear to ear grin. You could tell that he wanted nothing more than to kiss you and take you in his arms, but he obviously couldn’t. “Thank you! I love you, angel.”

You rolled your eyes playfully, allowing a smile to creep onto your face. “You’re lucky I love you, too. Now come on, I think they have the boat ready to go.”

------

A few hours later, everyone is lounging on the boat. You’d been out on the marsh for a good four hours, and the whole group was beginning to grow tired. The late afternoon sun bared down relentlessly on you, warming your skin and causing your body to overheat, despite the fact that you’d been swimming in the cool water for the past hour.

“God, it’s so damn hot out here. Can the sun chill the hell out for a second?” You complained, taking a swig of your beer.

The rest of the group murmured their agreement from various places on the boat. Absentmindedly, you gather your wet hair in your hand, holding it up on the back of your head to try and relieve the heat on your neck.

Big, big mistake.

Unknowingly, you’d exposed the massive hickey on the side of your neck for the entire boat to see.

The makeup you’d piled on that morning had apparently faded while you swam. Your hair covering it was the only thing keeping you from exposing yourself, and now it was revealed.

“What the HELL is that, Y/N?” Your brother was speaking, pointing at your now exposed hickey.

You looked immediately at JJ, whose eyes had gone wide and cheeks were pink.

“Um, I don’t know what you’re talking about, Birdie.” You replied quickly, not knowing what else to do.

“Is that a fucking hickey?” John B was walking towards you now, and your eyes were wide. You backed away from him, but you could only go so far on the small boat. He reached you eventually, pushing the hair from the side of your neck to reveal the bruise once again.

For a moment, your brother was silent. Strangely, this made you even more nervous then if he was screaming and shouting. You knew your brother well enough to know he was composing himself.

So that he wouldn’t strangle somebody.

“Who did it?” he said quietly. His voice was shaking with anger.

“Did what?” Your voice was shaking as well, but with fear for your boyfriend’s life instead.

“Who gave you the fucking hickey, Y/N! Stop playing dumb! Who did that to your neck.”

Panicking, you glanced over at JJ.

Yet another big, big mistake.

This glance was enough for John B to realize what the answer to his question was. You watched the pieces slowly connect in his mind, and then he was speaking again.

“It was YOU?” He rounded on the blonde boy near the edge of the boat. “You’re messing with my baby sister? Are you fucking kidding me, JJ?”

“Calm down, bird! It’s not what you think.” You were immediately at your brother’s side, trying to calm him down before your boyfriend’s body ended up at the bottom of marsh.

“Don’t tell me to calm down, Y/N! I think this is exactly what it looks like! It looks like this dickhead has a screwing around with my sister when I specifically told him not to!”

“We’re not just screwing around, John B!” JJ said in defense.

“Really? What the fuck else are you doing that would end with my baby sister having a hickey on her neck?”

“We’re dating!” You burst out. “We’ve been dating. For six months now.”

John B turned towards you immediately after your statement. He looked completely dumbfounded, as if he couldn’t possibly process the information he had just been given.

“Six months?” he echoed, and you nodded.

John B turned back to JJ.

“Surprise?” The blonde boy, hoping to lighten the mood.

Obviously, he was unsuccessful.

“You’ve been messing with my sister for SIX MONTHS, and I’m JUST NOW finding out? What the hell is wrong with you? I’m gonna fucking kill you!”

Before anyone could do anything to stop him, John B was lunging at JJ.

As if he’d been preparing to do so, JJ jumped off the side of the boat, landing cleanly in the water.

John B stood over the side of the boat screaming at him.

You mad eye contact with Kie,who was giggling slightly at the whole situation. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

This was going to be a long night.

~~~~~ A/N: Anddddd there’s the end! I really hope you guys liked this!

All notes and reblogs are highly appreciated!

ALSO: SEND REQUESTS!!

I love you guys so much,and Happy Holidays!!!!!

[phoenixblack89]

Secret Crushes

My second one shot is pure filth. Gotta warn ya. Might make a sequel... Dunno... But the lovely Travis is getting one next.... Then that amazing bad boy Mac.

@lilythemadqueen @fandomsaremykryponite enjoy sweeties!

Warning: Pure smut. Feels. Arsehole sibling. Underage drinking.

Fuck knows how many words this is cos ain't got a clue.

Edit: I've fixed the fucking errors I saw and added some to it. And got the read more to work! Yus! Enjoy sweetums

PART 2 Part 3

The party was in full swing and you hated it. Why your older sister had insisted on throwing a wild party while your parents were away was beyond your understanding. Must be a cool girl thing you thought as you wandered down the stairs to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. The house was packed to bursting with her friends and their friends. Hell, you're sure some of the teenagers weren't even from your town, not recognising the vast majority. Word of mouth had turned it from a small party for her classmates into a full on rave.

Sighing you pushed your way through to the kitchen your mother would no doubt be dismayed at seeing at the moment. Your mother was somewhat house proud and the kitchen was her pride and joy. Never ever letting dishes pile up in the sink, the shiny chrome polished within an inch of its life. You secretly couldn't wait for the fallout in the morning when they got back and saw the spilled alcohol, cigarette butt's and various other less savoury things spread from the party. Your sister was in soooo much trouble.

"Watch it fat bitch!"

You grit your teeth at the oh so creative insult as you shoved the jerk away from you. He glared down at you from his 6 foot height.

"What's an ugly fuck like ye even doing here?"

"I live here arsehole." You spat back, shouldering your way past and out the back door. Taking a deep breath you wandered the gravel path down to your secret escape at the bottom of the garden, hoping no one had tried to get in. Smiling as the old barn came into sight you felt the tension ease. As you neared you slowed, hearing two distinct and familiar voices. Your mouth suddenly felt drier as your heart pounded.

"Oh Connor!" Your sister moaned and you froze. 

She wouldn't... Would she? 

She knew you had a somewhat strong crush on the elder MacManus brother. His blue eyes and kind smile making butterflies in your stomach every time you saw him. Tears sprang to your eyes at her betrayal and you hurried your steps past the barn, hearing her shriek in shock. Connor and her eyes following you as you stormed past.

"Sis!"

"Fuck off Sara! Get back to the party!" You called after her, as you broke the treeline at the edge of the property. Tears fell slowly and silently as you pulled out a crumpled and almost empty packet of cigarettes. You slipped suddenly and fell head first down the bank to the stream running at the bottom of the hill. A shriek escaped as you braced for the very cold and surely sudden dip. You stopped quickly and waited for the impact against the icy water but it didn't come. Opening one eye you realised you were being held up by a pair of strong arms. A deep breath of relief came from you as the arms set you down on the ground gently.

"Ye alright?"

Your head turned and you gave a weak smile. Murphy's eyes were lined in pink hues, almost as if he, himself, had been crying like you.

"Could ask you the same."

"Aye... Just... Connor ye know."

"Yea... Sara."

He bit his lip and offered you a cigarette. You took it and shuffled to sit beside him. You both smoked and cried silently together. Both content to not mention the fact you were crying to the other, taking the comfort from each others pain and not judging.

"Older siblings, am I right?" You tried to joke, wiping at your eyes. "They sure know how to hit a sore spot."

"Connor's younger than me." Murphy laughed, wiping at his own cheeks. You smiled weakly and shrugged.

"Here's me thinking ya were twins."

"Aye... But I'm older. Fuckin' bastard knew I liked her as well." He sighed and ran his hand through his shaggy dark hair. You nodded and flicked your cigarette into the water, watching silently as it floated away.

"Yea... My sister she... Erm... She knew I liked Connor. Well... Was..... Damn... That I had a bit of a crush on him... Sorry."

"Yea? Bitch. Ain't a good sister doing that when she knew ye liked him" Murphy said, wrapping his arm around your bare shoulders at the shiver that ran you with the cold. He smiled as you wrapped yours around his lower back. "What a pair we make, eh? Our siblings are over there fuckin' like rabbits and here we are wishing it was us instead"

"Nah. We know better... Sara is just a bitch and Connor... He'll soon learn she's one too."

"Yea? What about you? Don't think I caught ya name lass?"

"Y/N. Everyone called me other things though." You gulped, biting your lip and giving a shaky sigh.

"Oh aye? What's that then?" He smirked at you, thinking it was some cute nickname.

"Mostly fatty, bitch, ugly... I'm not pretty or slim like Sara and I get why Connor would see her before me. She's everything I'm not."

"I... I don't... You are pretty. And so what if ye not some skinny bitch... I like ye and any one who can't see how amazing ye fuckin' are don't deserve ye time." He smiled sweetly down at you, his fingers grazing under your chin to make you look at him as you ducked your head.

"Thanks. But that's not true."

"Course it is! I say it is! And I always, always tell t' truth." He smirked, puffing out his chest. You giggled and shook your head. You leaned your head against his shoulder and sighed.

"I just wish someone would see me for me... And not what they always see. Fat ugly little bitch... Wish he'd of seen me..."

"He ain't worth ye time."

"She's not worth yours..."

"Aye. I see that now." He shuffled down to lay on his back, pulling you with him and smiled.

You lay in quiet contemplation for a while, the distant sounds of creaking wood and stifled moans making both your hearts ache.

"We should go get a drink! Drown our sorrows." You suggest, despite being not keen on alcohol. Murphy laughs and sits up, reaching into the pocket of his coat and pulling out one of your dad's whiskey bottles.

"Damn. Read my mind lass." He smiled and opened the bottle, gulping it down without a grimace before handing it to you. You choked down a mouthful and smacked his chest lightly as he snorted at you.

"I'm not a big drinker like you MacManus!"

He smirked and leaned over you so your faces were mere inches apart, a smirk curving the right side of his lips upwards.

"Aye... What else ain't ye big on then?"

"What?! What the fuck does that mean?" You feel your cheeks burning in embarrassing red.

"Well... I'm here and ye here.... Thought we could forget our sorrows another way... If ye up fer it?"

"You mean... In.... What way? I mean... I... Fuck" 

You sound like a fucking fool, stumbling over your words as his hand draws patterns along your waist slowly. Biting his lip he closes the distance between you and his lips meet yours. It's different to how you imagined your first kiss to be. You always imagined it to be a burning passionate, uncontrolled thing but this was soft, unurgent and gentle, sending a thrill of something to your core.

"How old are ye anyway, lass?" He asked, pulling away suddenly. You bit your lip and avoided his eyes until his finger brought your face to his once more. "I don't wanna get in trouble..."

"I just turned 18... You?"

"19... You... Have ye ever done this before?" His blue eyes searched yours for a moment before he sighed.

"No... But... I... I... Want to... If... If you want to leave you can. I won't stop you. I get most guys don't want someone so inexperienced."

Murphy glanced around for a moment, seeming to decide on the right course of action before slugged his long leather jacket off and laying on the ground beside you. He nudged his head to the side, your eyebrows creasing in confusion. He gave a smile and a chuckle before lifting your hips and sliding you on top of his jacket. His lips find yours again as soon as you shift yourself over on to his jacket fully and you wrap your arms around his neck. Gasping slightly as his hand drifts under your shirt and traces along your ribs. Pulling back slightly you take in his eyes, now darken with needful desire. He kisses your cheek softly and runs his palm upwards slowly and bits his lip, his white teeth shining brightly against their rose hue.

He licks his bottom lip as he tugs your shirt upwards and lowers his head to kiss along your stomach, you squirm in embarrassment. You hate the extra fat that gathered along your stomach and hips. His head raised to your face and he sighed.

"Ye beautiful lass. Every single inch..."

"Don't... I know its not true." You reply, tears coming to your eyes again in frustration. Anger at yourself for the lack of control you have over your own eating habits. You comfort ate, it was a habit nothing seemed to break you of. Murphy kissed you gently again and gazed down into Y/E/C eyes softly. His thumb running along your cheek softly.

"Told ye. Always tell t' truth. Believe me... Ye beautiful... Absolutely... Beautiful." He whispered between giving you soft kisses along you jawline and down your neck. You moaned as he kissed a sensitive spot. He smirked against your skin and focused on that one spot, sucking, licking and grazing it with his teeth. His hand reached under your shirt and stroked gently over the chubby plains of your torso to your chest.

A sharp gasp released from your mouth as his fingers ran along the edge of the unattractive sports bra you wore. Smirking against your collarbone he slipped his fingers inside and tweaked your nipple. A flood of arousal dropped into your panties and you moaned, arching upwards into his touch.

"Ye like that lass? Feel good, aye?"

You nodded and pulled his lips to yours. He groaned, your hips bucking upwards into his at the sensations he was causing to rush through you.

He pulled away and leaned back onto his knees, his hand running down your body to your covered core. He licked his lips and glanced at you as he ran a finger along your jeans button. Nodding at him, he smiled and flicked it open before dragging the zipper down slowly. His hands slipped inside and tugged them down over your hips as you bit your lip in nervousness.

You sat up slightly and reached for his belt, eyes boring into his blue ones as you pulled his belt from his jeans, tossing it to the side carelessly and reaching for the waistband. Shuffling slightly he helped you ease them down over his hips before laying you both down again. Only your underwear separating the heat of your bodies as he kissed you passionately, his hips rocking slowly into yours. Your hands found their way into his hair and tugged slightly as you both began panting at the friction of your hips. Your underwear was damp with your slick.

"Are ye sure ye want this lass?" Murphy panted into your mouth as his hand reached between you to cup your wet core, rubbing it hard causing you to gasp and squirm under him to get more pressure, more friction, more... Something, you didn't know.

"Please... Murphy..."

"I got ye lass." He whispered as his finger reaching under the elastic of your plain cotton underwear and ran through the folds of your dripping core. His fingers slid into you as his thumb found the bundle of nerves at the centre of your thighs. Rubbing his thumb in smooth, lazy circles he kissed against the spot he'd sucked a dark mark onto on your neck. His pants and moans echoing loudly in your ear as his fingers thrust in and out of you in time of his circling thumb. Your heart sped up and pounded against your ribs as a totally new sensation began building in your gut. "Cum fer me beautiful."

It felt like something inside had snapped and your body tensed all over, your legs shaking around Murphy's strong arm, your breath caught in your throat and as sudden as it began, it ended and you felt yourself more relaxed than you could ever remember being before. 

"Good girl."

"Fuck... Murphy..."

He raised his head and smiled cockily down at you. He bought his hand out of your underwear and raised it to his mouth. You could see the glint of your moisture coating his long, graceful fingers in the weak starlight as he began to lick and suck his fingers clean. Your jaw​ fell open at that sight. You had heard of people doing it but to see someone do that, and with your juices no less, caused a rush of shame and desire to course through you.

His face lowered to yours once more and he smirked against your ear.

"Maybe next time... I'll lick this delicious pussy out..."

"Murphy..." You gasped, feeling slick pooling once more.

"Aye lass?"

"Please..."

He kissed you once more, hands finding the waistband of your underwear and gently lowering them down and gazing down at your core. Your legs closed in shame as your cheeks heated. He chuckled and pushed them apart again and studied you intensely.

"Fuckin' perfection."

He reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out his wallet, fishing out a condom and ripping it open with his teeth. His eyes found yours as he shuffled out of his boxers and grasped his hard thick cock in one hand, pumping it up and down for several moments, his eyes never leaving the sight of your bared core. He rolled the condom down his cock and leaned over you once more.

"Are ye absolutely sure beautiful?"

"I'm sure Murphy." Your voice replied, an edge of nervousness obvious in the way your voice sounded so quiet and wavered slightly. He smiled and kissed you, his tongue slipping into your mouth as you felt his cock brush against your mound as he positioned himself between your thighs.

His tip ran along your slit as he guided it and you gasped at the foreign feeling. His eyes held yours as he slowly pushed into you. A sharp cry of pain came from you and your body tensed under him. He reached for your hand, which was clawing at the fabric of his coat and grasped it in his own. Holding himself still and steady until you adjusted. You nodded slightly as his lips ran along your cheek, kissing away the tears that had slipped from your eyes. His cock inched slowly deeper into your unexplored pussy and he paused again to look you in the eye, making sure you were okay with each slow thrust.

"Ye alright?"

"Hmmhummm." You replied, gritting your teeth as you felt the burning grow sharper as he inched forward more. He gave a groan and shook with restraint. His heart was pounding in his ears at the feeling of your tight cunt squeezing his cock. He had never been with a virgin and but knew from Connor's numerous boasts that they felt tighter than anything else. He was by no means a virgin himself and was determined to make this a pleasurable experience for you. 

Even if it killed him.

He gave a loud moan as he finally bottomed out inside you and kissed you passionately allowing you a moment or two of adjustment. You ran your fingers through his hair over and over as your tongues battled. You felt his cock twitch deep inside you and gasped into his mouth as his thumb once more began circling your clit.

"Murphy please..." You moaned, twitching your hips to encourage him to begin moving. His thrusts were slow and steady against you, taking his time to build until you both were absolutely sure you felt no pain anymore. His hand held one of your thighs around his hip and the other circling your clit, pleasure building slowly for the both of you. Sweet kisses left against each others necks as he began thrusting a little faster with each thrust.

Your back ached up to his chest as he hit a spot inside you that made you feel a sharp jolt of pure bliss.

"Ohhh... Fuckkkk.... Murphy..." You gasped into his mouth as he began aiming for that spot over and over, increasing his circling thumb's speed and pressure. Your toes curled in your boots as you suddenly were blinded by white light and your orgasm ripped through you. A loud shriek of unadulterated pleasure ripped from your throat. Murphy smirked and thrust harder, chasing his own release now he'd made you have a chance to cum over his cock. The walls of your pussy fluttering around his cock and your clit twitching under his thumb. His hair hung around his face in sweat soaked strands and you brushed them away to kiss him, still shaking in post orgasmic bliss. His body tensed against yours and he came, a guttural moan echoing loudly around you. His breaths coming sharp against your neck as he slumped over you and gave a little huff of pleasure.

"Fuck lass. I've never had one like that before."

"Huh... Guess that means it was okay?" You panted, suddenly nervous again. Would he feel satisfied? Did he really enjoy it? Was it good? Were you good?

He pushed himself onto his elbows and kissed you deeply, fucking your mouth with his tongue.

"Beautiful, I ain't ever lettin' ye go! Not after that."

You smiled as you kissed again with a laugh.

"MURPH! WHERE ARE YE?!"

You both froze and looked at each other. Murphy quickly pulled his cock from you, grimacing at the slight splattering of blood on the condom as he pulled it off and pulled his boxers and jeans on as you, too quickly dressed once more. Footsteps and the sounds of snapping twigs coming closer.

"Murph?!"

"Aye! I'm 'ere!" He yelled back as you stood and dusted down his jacket, handing it to him so he could swing it back onto his body. He grabbed your face and planted a sweet kiss on your lips quickly and smoothed down your hair as he gave your cheek a sweet kiss.

"There ye are! Oh..."

Connor paused and glanced between you two with an eyebrow raised.

"What’s going on here then, Murph?" He smirked. Murphy pushed his brother back in the direction of the house.

"I was helping her. She seemed upset. Dunno why though." He glanced over his shoulder at you and winked cheekily. "Kid needed a shoulder t' cry on. That's all."

"That right... Well come on. We best get home before Ma sends t' alarm out. Ye know how Uncle Silas is."

"Aye."

The brothers walked away and you followed slowly, Murphy glancing back over his shoulder at you with a happy but shy smile ghosting his face every now and then. Connor waved goodbye at the door to Sara and blew her a kiss in return to the one she'd blown and you rolled your eyes at the pair. Sara tried to grab your arm as you passed and you shrugged her off, rushing upstairs to your room and locking the door. You went to the window and watched as the twins walked down the drive.

Murphy paused before he left the gate, looked up and smiled widely at you and raised his hand. The streetlight lit his face up and you smiled, giving a small laugh as Connor shoved him ahead with a laugh and a glance upwards. You ducked away from the window quickly and lay on your bed, a ridiculously wide smile bracing your own face as you bit your lip and gave a small laugh.

Maybe tomorrow at school wouldn't be so bad. Not now you had a secret thing going on the darker haired MacManus.

[fedonciadale]

Hello, could you give your opinions about the Marauders, specifically about Sirius and Remus as characters? I am one of the very few people who doesn’t ship Wolfstar and doesn’t see Remus as the stereotypical nice, fluffy, shy gay man with no flaws or nuances, nor Sirius as the flamboyant and extremely eccentric guy. It actually baffles me how Wolfstar is so widely accepted as canon, even when canon establishes that those two distrusted each other (Sirius believed Remus to be the spy, and Remus started to doubt Sirius’ innocence only when he saw Peter’s name on the Map), not to mention the Prank and the fact that Sirius explicitly says that he doesn’t regret it (“...you see, Sirius here played a trick on him which nearly killed him, a trick which involved me —”Black made a derisive noise. “It served him right,” he sneered. “Sneaking around, trying to find out what we were up to...hoping he could get us expelled...”. Remus could have become a murderer thanks to him) and Sirius’ insensitivity towards Remus’ problem (“I’m bored,” said Sirius. “Wish it was full moon.” “You might,” said Lupin darkly from behind his book.). I don’t know about you, but this doesn’t scream romance to me. If anything, I believe Sirius could have had a crush on James, not Remus. How is it that the vast majority of the fandom ships them, going as far as believing it to be indisputably canon, and accuses everyone who doesn’t of homophobia? Sometimes, I think that Rowling’s black-and-white view applies to almost every fan. Not everyone of course, but so many are either Romione or anti Ron, either pro Marauders and vehemently anti Snape or vice versa, and the grey areas are never recognized. It’s frustrating! Sorry for the rant, hahah.

Hi there!

I certainly agree about the tendency of the fandom to overlook the grey areas or if you point them out you are accused of either whitewashing the villains or blemishing the heroes. It can be somewhat exhausting....

Anyway. The marauders. I realize that your question probably means that I walk on thin ice given how popular the marauders are.

A part of me gets it. When I first read the books and just gobbled up Harry’s PoV I really liked Sirius. What a cool godfather! Handsome, a motor bike, the opposite of the stuffy Dursleys, etc. And by book 3 we only learn that Severus Snape almost walked in on a newly changed WolfRemus and that James saved him in the very last minute. I really changed my opinion on Sirius later.

In contrast to Sirius, I still like Remus Lupin. I think he was the responsible one and should have detained his friends far more often, but I think in general he has matured well. I like the scene where he tells Harry that he should be careful with his life because his parents died for him. Also you can see, that he actually reaches out to Harry and he seems to be a good teacher and is one of the few adults in HP that is actually helpful. Remus is by far my most fav marauder.

We only learn more about the marauders with time. And the more I thought about the marauders the more I realized that I would absolutely have hated them if I had been at school with them. Irresponsible, bullying  (four against one), pranking, arrogant, probably never doing their homeworks and still getting good grades, carrying their ‘being gifted and rich’ on their sleeves, never adhering to rules, never getting into trouble because of it etc.

And in regard to how the marauders behave to Harry, I tend to side-eye them as well. I think Hermione is right when she accuses Sirius of mistaking Harry for James and I think Harry is right when he chastises Remus for trying to join the Horcrcux hunt when his wife is pregnant.

So, that being said, the one thing we know about the marauders which is good is that they joined the Order and fought against Voldemort. And they are ready to do quite a lot. Remus infiltrates the werewolves (can’t be that nice to hang around with Greyback) and Sirius is ready to fight for the order, he even swallows the fact that Snape is part of the order. He is not the best at hiding his contempt but neither is Snape. And in this situation they are both grown men and it’s one against one. So I don’t dislike their fights in TOotP as much as I dislike the bullying in school. And with their history it is almost impossible that they get along.

While I can’t see anything nice about the marauders as students Sirius and Remus do have redeeming qualities in the books and unlike James whose turn for the better we never get to see, we see both actually caring for people. And I wouldn’t even blame them for not caring about everyone, because we humans usually don’t manage that. Sirius is horrible to Kreacher but he is nice to Harry and I think that he actually has layers far beyond the ‘cool godfather’.

So, when I had finished the books, I saw Sirius as a grey character. And thinking about the whole betrayal of the Potters I had come to the following conclusion: Sirius was gay and in love with James (and unlike other things I did not blame JKR for not writing that openly, because at the time HP was written, children’s books couldn’t have homosexual relationships). While James might have been oblivious to the depth of Sirius’ feelings, Remus was not and neither was Dumbledore. Remus sort of knew that for Sirius, James would always come first, and Dumbledore had been in that place, so to say. When the Potters died and nobody but Sirius, James, Lily and Peter had been in the know about the switch of the secret keeper, everybody jumped to the conclusion that Sirius was indeed the traitor. Why? Well, Sirius had been the member of a family connected to Voldemort, but he had left this family behind and it made no sense that he suddenly would embrace his family’s legacy. I think Remus believed that Sirius had been the traitor because he finally snapped because of his unrequited love, and that is why he only believed that Sirius might be innocent when he saw Peter Pettigrew. Before that, he was extremely frightened for Harry and actually thought Sirius would kill Harry if given the chance.

So, that is obviously not in the text but has been my interpretation for quite some time. So, I agree that Sirius loved James.

That leads me to your question about WolfStar. Since I’m not a Remadora shipper, I’m sort of neutral towards the ship. The only basis in canon I see is their emotional reunion after it becomes clear that Peter was the traitor and not Sirius. And I sort of get why people take this and run from there.

I would argue though that canon hands us rather a few arguments why the ship doesn’t make sense. That Remus gets with Tonks in canon is not really an argument, because he could always have been with Sirius before that. Canon evidence against this is rather that for Sirius it was always James who was the most important member of the marauders. And while I can sort of buy that Remus as a teenager did not see how extremely dangerous the ‘prank’ Sirius played on Snape was, I think that the mature person we see in PoA would really, really hate that ‘prank’. Sirius basically tried to trick Remus into killing Snape or transforming him into a werewolf, when Remus himself was probably deeply traumatized by his own experience. It is quite clear that Remus hates being a werewolf - you could argue even up to a point where he forgets to take the drug that will make him harmless.

So, I don’t really vibe with the ship, like not at all, and I don’t think they make sense, not to me, not with how the characters are by the time of canon, but that is obviously irrelevant for fanon. People can twist canon, run with it, invent deleted scenes and that is all no problem for me.

There are so many things in canon HP that are a problem that I actually think we should be careful with using the argument ‘it is not canon’, because it is also canon that the elves are happy to be slaves, that squibs are discriminated against, that werewolves do not get the medicine they need, and that everyone is o.k. with it.

TLDR: I dislike the marauders and I don’t really vibe with WolfStar. I think Sirius was in love with James and didn’t actually care that much for Remus. But this is my interpretation. As for fanon Wolfstar: I just ignore it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thanks for the ask!

[lucky-sevens]

mechanisms fanfiction recommendations

this began as a compilation of my own works for my about, but i decided to recommend some others as well!

i have kept this list to 20 of other people’s + all of my own, because i have a lot of mechanisms fanfiction saved and didn’t want to go overboard! in addition, i’ve made sure that everyone i draw from is a different author, vs. several by the same person, for the sake of variation and giving more people a spotlight! i’ve also made sure everything is complete, which sadly means i’ve left out a few of my favorite longfics. i’ve also tried to have a decent balance of album-focused things vs crew-focused things.

a note; i’ve tried to have a variety (of both genre and length), but my tastes skew towards angst and longer oneshots, so that’ll be a lot of that sort of thing. (please mind the tags on some of these fics!) this is also all sfw, as i’m a minor, but it’s not all gen.

edit: i copy-pasted the summary from each of these works over to this post!

no matter what you do it won’t go away by AssyEr

Brian coming to terms with being made of metal.

Hatter and Hare Top 5 Gay Moments!! [NOT CLICKBAIT!!!] by shella688

Majors Hatter and Hare grinned at each other as they shook hands.

Then, all of a sudden, the grins faltered slightly as a realisation went through both their heads.

Oh no, the realisation went. He's cute.

Date Night: New Midgardian Prison Edition by OnceAndFloral

The Mechs cordially invite Lyfrassir to date night in their prison cell. And by "cordially invite" I mean "orchestrate an elaborate scheme".

eternity will see her dead by Garecc

Rose Reds are made to die, and eternity will see them dead, sent off to another bitter end.

cold as numbers by alderations

Ivy starts at the beginning.

Every morning, Ivy starts at the beginning. Rubbing alcohol, scalpel blades, sensations that should be twisting and cutting and crushing, if the words could coalesce into feelings. A subdued voice, a cool hand on her forehead. She is Ivy Alexandria. She starts at the beginning.

beat inside your heart by zinabug

Jonny and Nastya sibling oneshots part two. (Note from @lucky-sevens- they all function on their own.)

And Sew by fracnkie

The benefits of teaching your Toy Soldier to do the following: sew, do makeup, how to cure a sore throat, and how to shoot a plasma blaster.

Ashes To Ashes, Dust To Dust by CloudDreamer

It was the two of them against the world. But then the two of them against each other, and that seemed so much harder than fighting all the worlds combined.

Wayfarers by Oblivion_Wanderer

Nastya and Lyf meet in the cold of space; Nastya adrift after leaving the Mechanisms and Lyf fleeing from the destruction of the Yggdrasil system. Each feeling lost in their own way, they decide to travel together.

No Heart To Break by meteornight

The Toy Soldier was not real. It could never be real, not if it had any say in the matter. The widow had said that the toy was real, that it had once been a real man with a real heart. The toy knew that was a lie, for if it was a man, why would she treat it like a toy?

is it piety is it purity is it virtue by consumptive_sphinx

“Percy’s blunt, not stupid,“ Mordred says when Kay asks why they’re even friends, “and anyway she’s great, she never calculates anything, she just says stuff and makes everyone else deal with it. I could never be brave enough.”

This is because Mordred absolutely does calculate every word that comes out of his mouth, except sometimes when it’s two in the morning and everyone except him and Galahad and Percival has gone to sleep and he can argue as passionately in favor of peace as he wants with the only two people who won’t call him a traitor for it, and while he doesn’t not appreciate this trait of Percival’s, like hell is he going to admit to his real reason.

orpheus, the soldier, and the short-billed dowitchers by alexsandr

orpheus finds rest with an unexpected friend.

No Violins Allowed by Alienea

Lyf had been having a very peaceful and fulfilling few decades, at least in terms of work fulfillment and being able to afford to bail out of the system at the very first moment anything happened.

So of course that was when the Mechanisms appeared over the horizon.

Labyrinthine by DuskDragon39

Your story is a labyrinth.

Your story is built along wandering lines and windings so vague that you, its architect, cannot trace your way out. It is your scream at its center, your pain that fuels it.

(Or: Daedalus and the stories they tell about him.)

Baking With Goggles (Safety First!) by eminorseven

Marius tries to justify bringing Jonny and Tim to the kitchen. Brian daydreams. Jonny stabs many walnuts. Tim gets locked out and explodes things.

Typical baking stuff.

Surprising Salvage by OddmentsAndTweaks

A normal boring morning is made infinitely more exciting by the prospect of a ship boarding. The Mechanisms prepare for chaos and murder and some really good violence. What they get is one very defiantly defended ruined vessel and a morning no one expected at all.

I wanna stay here with you by SnailArmy 

Loki and Sigyn get to be wives, in stolen moments. 

As It Was by i_am_made_of_memoriies

Jonny walked down the corridor, his steps burdened by an invisible force. His face was passive, and where there was usually manic glee, there was only a hint of curiosity–someone was trying to enter through the airlocks, and he was going to kill them.

Nastya returns to the ship formerly known as the Aurora to find the mechanisms at the end of their time.

burned out from a joyride by spiralingcosmos

ashes has a nightmare; as a result, they make a new friend.

In Which Nastya Is The Narrator Of The Deaths by nonbinary_frog

(Note from @lucky-sevens: There is no summary included, but I feel like the title works well enough.)

---

my heart in your hands

How Jonny d'Ville's mechanization came about.

i’ve got a map of your eyes (but i’ve never seen your face)

That’s not the real Rose. All the memories and feelings were merely planted in her head.”

 “Very true.”

 “And given the effective age difference, it’s unlikely they’ll have much of a life together, not to mention the massive amount of trauma they’ve both endured.”

 “Absolutely.”

 “Not only that, but everyone else they’ve ever known or loved is dead and they’re trapped on a planet full of corpses in a vast interstellar empire that is going to suffer the most horrendous power vacuum and associated bloodshed the galaxy has ever seen. Oh, and they’re both known war criminals and will likely be on the run for the rest of their lives.”

“Like I said. I love a happy ending.”

-Ever After

the death of a phoenix

You are Ashes O'Reilly, and you are twenty-three, and you are dying.

an exercise in futility

Post-Lashings.

ballast

The Aurora doesn't have a daemon, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have a soul.

marching ever through the black

Whoever’s uniform you wear No loyalties to hold or share No burning hate, no bitter fear No heart to break, so shed no tear

TMA Is The Mechanisms’ Podcast (series)

The Magnus Archives is a podcast distributed by the Mechanisms, a crew of immortal space pirates roaming through the galaxy having fun, violence, violence, and violence. They have an inane distaste for laws, and so refuse to put their podcast under any kind of copyright law whatsoever. Today's episode was cowritten by Ivy Alexandria and Nastya Rasputina and performed by Jonny d'Ville. It was produced by the SS Aurora and directed by Jonny d'Ville- well, no, but sometimes he wants to be in charge of things and the other Mechanisms don't find it worth arguing about. To comment on episodes, make donations, and view links, images, and show notes, simply throw yourself into space and the Mechanisms may or may not find you. Probably best if they don't. Thank you for listening, though why you choose to spend your time like this is beyond the Blogbot's understanding.

thank you for reading! i’d highly suggest trying these!

[girlboss-molina]

Be Who You Are (No Compromise)

A Julie and the Phantoms Modern Royalty AU

Chapter 3: A Demonstrative Lesson in Simping

AO3 Link

Words: 12.8k

-----

Alex POV

...

It had been a week, and Alex hadn’t seen Willie since that fateful night when he’d earned the nickname “your royal pancakeness.” It was probably better that way, to be honest. The way Willie moved, everything about him, the energy that surrounded him, it made Alex feel weird and fluttery. If his anxious reading through the random romance novels on the bookshelf in his room, plus his constant googling of “do I have a crush” quizzes (on incognito tabs, obviously; treason wasn’t very high on his bucket list) said anything about his current situation, though, he was royally screwed. 

No pun intended.

It didn’t help, either, that every time he thought about the baker’s smile, his long hair, the way his dark eyes crinkled at the edges when he laughed, a shiver ran down Alex’s spine. It was so confusing. How the hell could he have a crush on someone he barely knew?

He dragged a hand down his face, staring at the ceiling. Laying on the floor and questioning his existence had become a daily occurrence, oftentimes - like today - with Luke by his side. 

“Emotions are the bane of my existence,” he said plaintively, not bothering to look away from the high ceilings, letting the flecks of dust in the air blend in with the tiny spots in his vision after not blinking for so long. “Like,” he continued, “how is it logical that a couple little zaps to the brain can make your stomach drop, or make your palms sweat, or even a week after something happened, still make you feel cold and warm at the same time?”

He wasn’t sure if the question was meant to be rhetorical, but he was still grateful for Luke’s reply, however unhelpful it may turn out to be.

“Bro, I don’t know,” he agreed. “Like, one minute you’re fine, and the next you’re about to accidentally commit treason.” Alex let out a dry laugh.

“Tell me about it.” A few moments passed, and he blinked, finally letting new moisture clear his vision. “Also, called it.”

“Wh-” Luke started, clearing his throat. “What do you mean, ‘called it?’”

“You like Julie?” Alex assumed, ignoring the swelling bubble of treasonous worry in his stomach. “I might’ve overthought every possible aspect of this, and your comment about accidental treason confirmed what I already thought.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Luke drag a hand down his face, heard him groan.

“I barely know her,” he started, “but I’m already so… I don’t even know the word. Intrigued? Infatuated? In-something.” Alex nodded, letting his head smack back down on the carpet. “I’m sorry,” he added. 

“Why?”

“I can only imagine how much this must be on your anxiety, and this doesn’t help.”

“It doesn’t, but it’s not the first bit of accidental treason.” His eyes finally flicked away from their spot on the ceiling as Luke bolted upright. 

“No way,” he said. “Who?” Alex’s cheeks flushed. Before he could respond, though, Luke spoke again. “Wait, let me get this straight. Well, gay. You’ve liked a guy for an entire week, and you didn’t tell me? This is a betrayal of our friendship!” Alex knew he was being dramatic.

“You say that as if you didn’t do the exact same thing,” he countered. Luke considered that for a moment. 

“Whatever. Okay, details.”

“His name’s Willie,” he said. “He’s a baker down at the kitchens behind the grand hall.” Alex saw a huge grin spread on Luke’s face, but couldn’t bring himself to share his friend’s ever-blooming optimism. He sighed. “Do you think there’s a way to go through with the marriage but like, platonically? Like, just tell the people ‘yeah we’re getting married, just not romantically.’ I just think that would work out better for everybody.”

“Couldn’t agree more,” Luke said. “Not sure how it would work out, but I agree.”

“On the plus side, being criminals automatically makes us at least 50% cooler.”

“Dude, aren’t you the one with anxiety?”

“I have my moments.”

A familiar knock rang on the door. How, in one week, it had become so familiar, they would never know. But as Alex told Reggie to come in, his infectious smile permeated through the room like the smell of vanilla on a cold day. 

“Did I hear something about treason?” he asked excitedly. “Because I am always down. Tell your friends; you need a treason buddy, I’m your guy. But of course, for legal reasons, that’s a joke.” Alex snorted. 

Reggie had managed to weasel his way into both his and Luke’s hearts in a matter of days. He was so sweet, so loving, and such a dork, how could he not? Luke’s interactions with Reggie reminded Alex of two best friends who supported each other unconditionally. Alex’s own interactions with the princess’s brother? They were more like bantering siblings who loved each other so much, but were not above toilet-papering the other’s room. 

“Well,” Luke began, “the arranged marriage was already a major fuck-up on the council’s decision. We could add in some treason to the mix. Just for funsies.”

“You just want to hang out with Julie, don’t you?” Alex prodded. Luke flushed, and Reggie grinned. 

“Called it.”

“Oh come on, you too?”

“Dude,” Reggie said. “I love you, but you’re not exactly subtle.” Luke pouted, and Alex cracked up. “You, on the other hand,” Reggie added, “I’m not sure who your treasonous crush is.”

“A baker named Willie,” Luke interjected before Alex could reply. “And I still haven’t heard the story of how you met, I might add.” Alex groaned.

“I assume there’s no way I’m getting out of this?”

“Not a chance,” Luke and Reggie replied in unison.

This was going to be a disaster.

…

After explaining the details of how he met Willie, and enduring multiple agonizing minutes of Reggie and Luke gushing about an “adorable, treasonous meet-cute,” Alex finally prodded Luke for details about his feelings for Julie. 

“Uh, well, it’s not really feelings, plus, I doubt Reggie wants to hear about hypothetical feelings someone might have for his sister.”

“Wrong,” Reggie said. “I want to know everything.” Alex laughed. 

“See, I would explain, but the self-defense class starts in a minute-”

“Thirty,” Reggie corrected.

“Like I said, it starts in a minute, so I’d better run.” Without another word, he bolted out the door.

“You can’t keep running from your feelings forever,” Alex called to Luke.

“No, but I can run from you two goons!” Alex and Reggie couldn’t contain their laughter by that point, so they let that simp of a man get out of it for a little while. 

…

After hanging out with Reggie in the recording studio, Alex was walking down the corridor behind the great hall, for old time’s (a week ago) sake, pacing back and forth. He didn’t actually know what he would do if someone asked why the prince was pacing the hallway near the kitchens for no apparent reason, but what happened was simultaneously both better and worse, because who would he run into (thankfully not literally this time) but a familiar brown-eyed man with a crooked smile. 

“Hey there, your royal pancakeness!” He called, and oh, how Alex wished Willie didn’t have such an endearing smile.

“Hey, Willie!” He ignored the butterflies rising in his stomach. “How’s it going?”

“Pretty good! Just got on break. You okay?” He asked, a flicker of concern in his eyes.

“Oh, yeah,” Alex assured him. “Just walking.”

“Cool.” 

Alex tried not to stare, but Willie made it impossible. The way he flipped his long hair, the way his dark eyes sparkled with flecks of gold in the light, how his smile lit up every time he spoke. The adorable smudge of flour on his nose didn’t help, either. 

“You sure?” Willie asked, the faint flicker of concern right back to the furrow in his eyebrows. “You look a little dazed.”

Yeah, that’s because you’re gorgeous and I already have a crush on you despite only meeting you once. 

“Just a little tired, I guess.” The lie was a classic one, and Willie could surely see through the bullshit, but if he did, he didn’t prod. 

“Well, make sure you get some sleep tonight. In the meantime, I’m off to skate a little. You wanna come?”

Skating? There was a 100% chance that Alex would fall flat on his ass and humiliate himself. He’d never once been on a skateboard, at least, not since he’d sprained his wrist when he was seven, and his mother had banned all skateboards from the palace. And yet, the adorable look in Willie’s eyes still had Alex saying, “I’d love too.” He mentally kicked himself, but that annoyance was quickly replaced with another swarm of butterflies when Willie’s smile lit up even brighter than before. 

“Sick! Follow me.”

…

The skate park wasn’t technically a skate park by any means. It was an actual park, hidden away in the vast garden grounds of Dahlia, and it really said something about the size of the palace grounds that Alex didn’t even know it was there. 

Concrete sidewalks lined the perimeter, with swirling roundabouts at the corners, plus unoccupied metal benches and sliding railings that Willie didn’t hesitate to jump over. He even did a move where he jumped and the skateboard did a flip, before landing right back on it, steady as ever. But when Alex watched him let out a whoop and skate quickly around the roundabout as it sloped, not losing his balance once, he was sure Willie was just showing off. 

Alex did his best to cool his blushing face as Willie made his way back. 

“Want to try?” He asked.

“Oh, no,” he deflected. “I’ve never actually skateboarded before, and I’m pretty sure I’d just look stupid.”

“You’ve never skated before?”

“Not once.” He knew it was technically a lie, because he’d skated once when he was seven but that didn’t really count, but it still wasn’t true and what if Willie found out about the lie and hated him for being dishonest and what if he seemed like a bitch for lying about something so miniscule and-

“Well, there’s an easy way to fix that,” Willie said with a grin, making all of Alex’s previous anxieties melt away. They were, of course, quickly replaced with new ones because cute boy, but still. 

Before Alex knew it, Willie was extending his hand and stepping off the skateboard, that beautiful, crooked smile still plastered on his gorgeous face. And then, despite the voice in the back of his head, screaming to play it safe, he listened to the whisper, barely audible, telling him to go for it. So, before he could change his mind, he took Willie’s hand. It was rough and calloused, with a few scars peppered on his fingers, but it was perfect. Slowly, tentatively, he stepped onto the skateboard, and…

Immediately fell flat on his ass. Or, he would have, had Willie not been quicker and run behind him, catching him by the shoulders with a laugh. Alex’s cheeks did their best to catch fire, and he immediately apologized.

“No, bro, you’re good! Just glad I caught you,” Willie said. “You okay?” 

“Yeah,” Alex replied, only just noticing how long Willie’s eyelashes were. He wasn't sure if he imagined it when Willie’s cheeks looked darker the longer he stared. Alex cleared his throat. 

“Okay, let’s try this again.” Willie outstretched his hand again, and this time, Alex didn’t hesitate before taking it. He took a deep breath, grounding himself before stepping onto the skateboard, squeezing the other man’s hand and using him for support.

“I did it!” he exclaimed, very excitedly, considering all he’d done was step onto an immobile skateboard. But Willie shared his excitement. 

“Hell yeah, dude! Want me to push you so you move?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Understandable, have a nice day.” Alex and Willie stared at each other, deadpan, before bursting out laughing. But, because the universe hated him, Alex fell forwards, right on top of Willie, chests pressed together and noses barely apart.

He tried to move, but he was too caught up in how fucking close they were. Willie had caught himself, leaning backwards but standing, and somehow his arms had gotten wrapped around Alex’s waist, holding him tight. It was clearly just to make sure neither of them fell, but Alex couldn’t shake the feeling in his gut. 

Neither of them moved. Alex took a steadying breath, not looking away from Willie’s beautiful eyes. He cursed his stupid heart for fluttering, for suggesting treason because of a guy he’d just met, a guy with eyes so beautiful it should’ve been illegal, a guy with a perfect sense of humor, a guy who was so energetic and kind but also understanding, a guy who was now standing upright and steady, as was Alex, but who was still holding him close, arms wrapped around his waist. A guy who was surely just making sure he was still steady, but who looked at him with such intensity that it made him weak in the knees. 

Finally, he cleared his throat and stepped back. 

“Sorry, I kinda… Fell.” Willie gave that perfect laugh, and oh, if Alex wasn’t already smitten, he was now.

“Yeah, I caught that. No pun intended.” Alex let out an extremely undignified snort. 

“That,” he said through giggles, “was so bad.” When he looked up, Willie’s cheeks were red but he laughed too. 

Maybe treasonous feelings weren’t so bad. 

…

As he made his way up to his quarters, Alex flopped on his bed, a giddy grin still over his face. His cheeks hurt from smiling, but he just couldn’t stop. Willie was so… he didn’t even have the words. His laugh was like sunshine in the Summer, warm and bright and the source of all life in the world. His eyes were dark but somehow bright as well, and in the light they looked like bowls of honey as they twinkled. Everything about him was so ethereal, and Alex was completely gone on him. Which was, of course, extremely illegal, but he somehow couldn’t bring himself to care. 

As Luke walked in, the aroma of shampoo floating with him and giving away the fact that he’d just showered, he heard a laugh.

“How was your date?” Alex didn’t bother denying it.

“He tried to teach me how to skateboard,” he said, eyes dreamy as he remembered the fond look in Willie’s eyes as he’d fallen. “I almost fell but he-”

“No way. Did he catch you?”

“Twice.” Alex laughed when Luke squealed. 

“Well, dude, you know it’s your turn to ask him out, right?”

What?

Alex bolted upright. “What do you mean?”

“I know you weren’t the one to ask him out today. That means it’s your turn to find him and ask him out for another little outing.”

“Fuck.” How the hell was he supposed to do that? He couldn’t just keep wandering the halls behind the kitchens, people would get suspicious. But… maybe he could find Willie again at the park. He’d seemed to know it well.

But what if that made him look creepy? That was Willie’s area that he’d brought Alex to, Alex was merely a guest in Willie’s beautiful domain, even if it was part of the palace. He still felt like he would be intruding. 

“I’ll let you deal with that,” Luke said with a laugh.

“Yeah. In the meantime, though, how was self-defense?” Luke had a dopey grin as soon as he thought. 

“Amazing.”

Alex listened to his best friend ramble on and on about how incredible it was, or rather, she was. Apparently, Julie had been instructed to go early, so Luke wasn’t able to avoid her. But it didn’t matter, because Alex got to hear his lovestruck best friend rant about how badass she was and how incredible their fights were when they sparred. 

A knock rang on the door. Alex cleared his throat, standing up. Luke straightened his back. When he shot Alex a look, Alex nodded.

“Come in.” As the handle turned, a pit in Alex’s stomach formed as King Ray Molina stepped through. He scrambled into a bow, as did Luke.

“Your majesty, is everything alright?”

“It’s okay, mijos, there’s no need to bow.” Alex stood straight again. “You are needed in the royal office. Well, technically only Alex, but Luke should come too. And put on something respectable but comfortable. It might be a long night.” With that, Ray left, leaving the two of them there.

A sinking pit in Alex’s stomach told him that something was very, very wrong. 

-----

Luke POV

...

Laying on the floor with Alex was a daily occurrence. It truly was the best spot to have a crisis.

“Emotions are the bane of my existence,” Alex declared. Luke had to agree. “Like,” he continued, “how is it logical that a couple little zaps to the brain can make your stomach drop, or make your palms sweat, or even a week after something happened, still make you feel cold and warm at the same time?”

“Bro, I don’t know,” he agreed. “Like, one minute you’re fine, and the next you’re about to accidentally commit treason.” Alex let out a dry laugh.

“Tell me about it.” A few moments passed, and Luke stared at the ceiling. There were small knots in the gently stained wood planks, with no particular rhyme or reason. “Also, called it.”

“Wh-” Luke started, clearing his throat. “What do you mean, ‘called it?’”

“You like Julie?” Alex assumed. Luke fumbled for an answer that wouldn’t be treasonous. “I might’ve overthought every possible aspect of this, and your comment about accidental treason confirmed what I already thought.” Luke dragged a hand down his face and groaned. How obvious was he? 

“I barely know her,” he started, “but I’m already so… I don’t even know the word. Intrigued? Infatuated? In-something.” In love, maybe. 

“I’m sorry,” he added after a moment.

“Why?”

“I can only imagine how much this must be on your anxiety, and this doesn’t help.” Luke mentally kicked himself for adding another worry onto his best friend’s anxiety.

“It doesn’t, but it’s not the first bit of accidental treason.” Luke took a moment to process that before bolting upright.

“No way,” he said. “Who?” He ignored Alex’s blush. “Wait, let me get this straight. Well, gay. You’ve liked a guy for an entire week, and you didn’t tell me? This is a betrayal of our friendship!” How dare he? That was cruel. Luke could’ve been teasing him for seven fucking days and Alex had the gall to hide it?

The lion, the witch, and the audacity of this bitch.

“You say that as if you didn’t do the exact same thing,” Alex countered. Luke considered that for a moment. 

“Whatever. Okay, details.”

…

After hearing the adorable details of Alex’s meet-cute with Willie, Luke had officially decided he would be officiating their wedding. He could already see it. Of course, he didn’t have much time to imagine his best friend’s future husband, because soon Alex and Reggie were giving him shit for his “crush” on Julie, and he hightailed it out of there, deciding to go to self-defense early. He could just sit on the bench and wait, be free of anybody who would make his thoughts race-

But of course he couldn’t, because right there was Julie, walking into the arena. 

"Hey Luke!" She called with a wave.

"Hey, Julie, what’s up?” He dearly hoped he wasn't blushing.

“Not much,” she replied. “Just came early because Lady Athena wanted me to show the trainees my upside-down move.” She tightened her ponytail. “Why are you here? The main session doesn’t start for another thirty minutes.” Luke blushed, his stomach flipping. What if she thought he was annoying?

“Oh,” he said with a shy laugh. “Alex and Reggie were giving me shit for… something,” he explained, hoping she didn’t catch his slip, “and I decided to escape.” Julie nodded.

“That’s valid.” 

“Julie?” called Lady Athena. “You ready?”

“That's my cue,” she said with a smirk, hopping away and over to stand next to the coach. Luke couldn’t keep his eyes off her. The way she moved was ethereal, like a butterfly given human form. 

She began explaining her move to the trainees, who were all looking very confused, which Luke understood. It looked super complicated, and you would need some serious core strength to pull it off. But somehow she did it in slow fucking motion. 

He found himself migrating towards Julie’s friends, who thankfully greeted him with a smile.

Whispering introductions between them, he met Flynn (the girl with the braids), Carrie (Flynn’s girlfriend), and Mira (Julie’s lady-in-waiting). And as if Luke didn’t already have a healthy amount of fear and respect for the princess, she happened to surround herself with other badasses. 

Flynn had an air of confidence around her. The way she squared her shoulders as she walked made her long, dark braids sway behind her back, and the bold style she always had just added to the effect. Carrie, Flynn’s girlfriend, was proof that some people were born to be royal. Everything Carrie did and wore, no matter how simple - like her current athletic clothes - screamed royalty, even though she wasn’t technically royal. And Mira was kind and confident, but there was an air about her that told Luke, this is a powerful woman. Not that he was surprised; He’d seen her fights against Julie. 

But he just couldn’t take his eyes off of Julie. She moved so cleanly, never stumbling no matter how difficult the position must’ve been, and even as she held herself sideways on one arm and spun, she landed with uncanny grace. 

“Okay, Julie, why don’t you get some water, and we’ll do the demonstrations with opponents?” Lady Athena’s long ponytail swished as she walked towards her, and Luke blushed when Julie smiled. 

“Sounds good.” She spun on her heel, jogging to the group and catching Luke’s eye. He could’ve sworn her cheeks darkened, but then again, that move made for an intense workout. 

“Dude, I don’t know how you managed to do that spin in slow motion,” Mira told her. Julie laughed, and Luke had never heard a sound so beautiful.

“Practice and good core strength.” She sat down on the bench, Mira by her side. So he was right; core strength was a necessity. 

“Hey, uh, Julie?” asked Luke shyly. She was drinking water, so she hummed a questioning tone. Luke cleared his throat. “Would it be okay if I joined them and tried to learn the move?” he asked, gesturing his head to the group of preparing trainees. Julie put down her water bottle, smirking, and Luke felt his own smile rising, though he was also nervous. He wasn’t sure why. 

“Technically, you’re not a trainee.” Oh. That was why. Luke opened his mouth to apologize, before Julie cut him off. “But, you could be one of the demonstrative opponents if you want to,” she offered. “I’m supposed to show how the move works against different fighting styles, and I think a Tamborian fighting style would add some variety.” Luke grinned and nodded, hoping his cheeks weren’t as red as they felt. 

“Sounds good, boss.” That time he did see Julie blush, and couldn’t help but feel proud of himself. 

As Julie made her way over to the front of the mats, with Carrie by her side, he sat on the bench next to Mira, enchanted. Before they started their fight, though, Mira elbowed him in the ribs. When he glanced over, she didn’t say anything, but gave him a knowing smirk that made him flush. Was he really that obvious?

“What?”

“You’re not as subtle as you think,” she said. Luke stammered, trying to find an excuse. Mira laughed. 

“Don’t worry, dude. I’m not sure if they would exile me for saying this, but you guys would be cute together. Might be illegal, but then again, I’m always down for some treason.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said, but he knew he was joking. Evidently, Mira did as well, because she snorted and went back to watching Julie and Carrie. 

Luke eagerly did the same, watching as Julie made the first move. Carrie hopped out of the way, striking and giving Julie and opportunity to lean forwards. The princess hopped and landed on her right hand, spinning and tripping Carrie. Luke didn’t pay attention to what she said, but was entranced by how she moved. He vaguely remembered something about a dancer. 

“That’s my cue,” Mira told him as Julie finished the round against Carrie. “See you later, lover boy.” Before Luke could come up with a comeback for Julie’s kind but blunt friend, she winked and walked away. 

As Julie fought Mira, she mentioned something about a ninja, as well as the way the word “lithe” sounded on her tongue. He watched as she danced around the other girl, twisting and tripping her before winning the fight. 

Flynn strutted over to Julie, a confident smirk on her face. She was catlike when she fought, something both Luke and Julie noticed, and he was very proud of himself for thinking of it as she pointed it out. 

“However,” Julie said as she made the final spin, pinning Flynn and grabbing her collar, “it turns out, cats don’t always land on their feet.”

Whoa. 

Not only was she a complete and utter badass, but she was good at bantering with her friends. Luke wasn’t sure why he loved that so much, but a grin broke out on his face, blushing as he caught Julie’s gaze. 

"Next,” Julie said, snapping Luke back to the present, “I'm going to fight with Luke. He's from Tambor, so this will be new." She nodded, and he obeyed, practically floating over to her. 

As Julie stepped into fighting position, Luke winked, quite pleased with himself for flustering her, then struck. Unfortunately, he wasn’t able to get the upper hand. Julie took advantage of his opportunistic nature, when he left himself vulnerable as he attacked, she struck back with twice the confidence.

Soon, though, he tripped. As he lost his balance, Julie spun upside down and tripped him. Luke’s back hit the ground and he let out a gentle “oof,” but couldn’t recover before Julie was on top of him. Luke was extremely aware of the way her leg pinned his hips down to the mat, the way her shoulders moved as she breathed evenly but quickly, the way her hand curled into a fist as she grabbed his collar and pulled her other arm backwards to finish. He tried to move his arms, but the way she’d positioned her torso made it impossible for him to defend his head from her possible blow. He was completely at the mercy of this girl, trusting her not to strike with finality, but not trusting his own unruly heart to steady as he found himself lost in her eyes.

But then, because the universe hated him, Julie winked. His breath caught in his throat and he flushed bright red.

For a moment, the world seemed to still. Luke was acutely aware of the shine of her dark skin, the single loose curl by her ear, the confident smirk on her face. But just as quickly as it had happened, it was over. Julie got up, extending her arm, which Luke took. Everywhere her hand touched left tingles on his forearm.

“Nice job!” she told him. He rolled his eyes.

“Oh, please, I just got my ass kicked and you didn’t even break a sweat.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I knew you were awesome, but I didn’t know you were a human wrecking ball.” Of course, when Julie blushed, he felt a surge of confidence and accomplishment.

“I- well, I don’t-”

“He’s right,” Carrie insisted. You were awesome.” Luke grinned and nodded, reaching over to high-five her. 

“Okay, trainees,” called Lady Athena. “Pair up and spar. If you want, spot the other and try the move. I’ll be hovering to make sure nobody gets hurt.” She clapped her hands with finality, and the trainees did as they were told. “The rest of you,” she added, directed at Luke and the Badasses, “practice while you can. Oh, Julie, I want you to practice with Luke today. See if you can work out some similarities and differences between Dahlian and Tamborian fighting styles.”

Oh.

Fuck.

How the hell was Luke going to survive sparring with Julie multiple times, purely for practice and not staged? He wouldn’t be able to go one minute without completely losing it every time she looked at him. 

Luke noticed Carrie, Mira, and Flynn all giving him a look that made him fidget. It turned out he was the opposite of subtle. And as Reggie walked towards them, a knowing smirk on his face as well, Luke knew he was dead. He quickly tried to compose himself.

“Alright, boss,” he said after a moment. “Ready to kick my ass?” Julie laughed, and Luke could’ve listened to that sound for the rest of his life.

“Let’s do it.”

Luke struck first, a playful grin on his face. Julie quickly deflected, twisting his arm and twirling behind him, causing Luke’s heart to flutter. It didn’t last long, though, because then she was shoving the backs of his knees and pinning him as he fell down, kneeling hunched over with her holding his wrists behind his back. 

“That’s one for me!” She laughed as he groaned. Way to humiliate yourself, Patterson.

“Damn, and to think I ever thought I was good at hand-to-hand.” Luke took her arm, letting her help him up. An idea formed in his head, a cruel one, but it would work. He had to quickly hide the grin on his face. “Wait, I want to try that spinny move thing.” As Julie stepped back. Luke smirked to himself, hopping forward and purposely falling during the spin. It wasn’t like he needed to try to fall, though; that move was impossible.

“Gah, my wrist!” He feigned injury, but his heart still fluttered as Julie rushed over to him. She cared. 

But, he couldn’t play nice. He grinned and quickly took her arm, pulling her down to the ground and flipping on top of her. Luke pinned her shoulders, shooting her a cocky grin, but ignoring the look on her face. It was so soft and surprised, but playful and… he daresay impressed. 

“And that’s one for me.” 

“That wouldn’t work in a real fight, you know,” she informed Luke as she rolled out from under him. She wasn’t humiliated, as far as he could tell, which was probably a good thing. Humiliating the heiress to the Dahlian throne wasn’t a great idea. But her cheeks were darkened with a blush, and she was certainly flustered. Luke patted himself on the back.

“Oh, I know,” he said calmly. “It’s just fun to annoy you.” He could’ve sworn she blushed even more, but she looked away too quickly for him to confirm.

“Alright, rematch,” she decided, her voice confident. Luke nodded, and Julie hopped into fighting position. Luke did the same, noting how adorable it was as she bounced on the balls of her feet, before striking. She moved quickly and unpredictably, but when Luke dodged a hit to his shoulder and she hopped forward, he knew what was coming. He leaned backwards and, as her legs swept underneath his ankles, he jumped and avoided the killer move. 

As he avoided her spin, he noticed Julie trying to recover as quickly as she could, but she stumbled, and Luke quickly took advantage of that. He grabbed her arm, spinning her around almost like a ballroom dance, and then holding her back against his chest, his arm pinning her shoulders. He felt his own heartbeat against her back, her rapid breathing making her shoulder blades prick his stomach. 

“I win,” he whispered, a grin on his face- one that was quickly replaced with a look of shock when Julie reached up and grabbed his wrist, leaning forwards and throwing him to the floor upside down. As his back hit the ground, he let out a soft “oof” and didn’t get the chance to move before Julie was on top of him, flattening her body over his to make sure he couldn’t move and pinning his shoulders with her forearm. He knew he’d lost the fight, but currently he was more interested in the quirked eyebrow on her face, the shine of sweat on her forehead, and how very close they were.

“Actually, I win.” 

… 

Luke stood in the shower, letting the cool water wash over him. He normally took warm showers, even after working out, but today he needed the familiar feeling of cold shivers down his spine. There was something about Julie that made him so warm, like he’d known her his whole life. Julie was like the feeling of a sip of warm cocoa on a winter day, like sunlight peeking over the mountaintops. She was intriguing, so complicated and layered, like a mystery that he desperately wanted to solve. Luke couldn’t piece together just why she had that effect on him, though he had a few ideas. 

Quickly drying himself off, he changed into a lightweight guard uniform. It was more of a casual suit than a uniform; the guardsmen dress codes in Dahlia weren’t nearly as strict as they were in Tambor. They were more focused on abilities rather than looking like guards. So long as you looked respectable, that was enough. 

The cool fabric of the white dress shirt felt good against his skin, and the heather grey vest was a light pressure, keeping him secure. The matching jacket was tailored to a slim fit, but, given that he was a guard, there were also sheaths built into the inside, with simple but deadly daggers within them. 

If he was being honest, Luke hated carrying weapons. He felt cool, sure, but he still hated it. No matter how well they were hidden - and well hidden they were; not even the outlines were visible from the outside - he always knew they were there. That, even though they should be safe, there was always a possibility. A possibility that he might end up using one of the cruel blades strapped to his chest.

…

When he walked into Alex’s room from his quarters across the hall, his best friend was sprawled out on his bed, a dopey grin spread across his face. Luke immediately knew he’d been with Willie. 

“How was your date?”

“He tried to teach me how to skateboard,” he said. Luke grinned to himself. That was the cutest thing ever. “I almost fell but he-” Luke gasped, knowing his best friend’s disaster-gay-levels well enough to know where this was going.

“No way. Did he catch you?”

“Twice.” Luke squealed, bringing his hands to his cheeks. Alex was getting a classic boyfriend meet-cute and pining stage. It was like something out of a romance novel.

“Well, dude, you know it’s your turn to ask him out, right?” Luke laughed, practically feeling Alex’s nervousness, which was confirmed when Alex bolted upright. 

“What do you mean?” Luke snorted. Dumbass.

“I know you weren’t the one to ask him out today. That means it’s your turn to find him and ask him out for another little outing.”

“Fuck.” Luke could see the thoughts running a million miles an hour in his friend’s head, and soon he would be spiraling into gay panic and anxiety.

“I’ll let you deal with that,” Luke said with a laugh.

“Yeah. In the meantime, though, how was self-defense?” Luke didn’t bother hiding the huge grin that spread across his face as he remembered his time with Julie.

“Amazing. I got there early since you and Reggie were being assholes-”

“Love you too.”

“-But it turned out she was there early as well. Well, her and her friends. She has this super badass move where she jumps and lands on one fucking hand and spins twice, tripping you backwards and then pinning you, and she was teaching it to the trainees. Holy fuck, Alex, I don’t know how she does it. And she did it in slow motion!” He raked a hand through his hair. “She was going to demonstrate the move in fights with Mira, Flynn, and Carrie, and I asked if I could join the trainees to learn the move, because of course I did, and then she said that I ‘technically wasn’t a trainee,’ but then offered to let me be one of the demonstrative opponents.”

“And I’m guessing that went well?”

“Yeah,” he said with a grin. “And then, when the trainees were practicing, Lady Athena paired us for the rest of the session, so I got to spar with her.”

“Oooooh!” Luke gave a light punch in mock offense, but he was still glowing. 

“Bro, she’s amazing.” 

“I can see that.” Luke ignored the shit-eating grin on Alex’s face.

A knock rang on the door, and Luke straightened, looking at Alex as he stood up.

“Come in.” When King Ray walked in, Luke hastily bowed.

“Your majesty, is everything alright?” Alex asked.

“It’s okay, mijos, there’s no need to bow. You are needed in the royal office. Well, technically only Alex, but Luke should come too.” Luke nodded as Ray looked at him. “And put on something respectable but comfortable. It might be a long night.” With that, Ray left, leaving the two of them there.

Something was wrong.

-----

Reggie POV

...

Suit vest long abandoned, sleeves messily rolled up, Reggie fiddled with the stim toy in his pocket, humming to himself as he wandered the long expanse of the Dahlian palace gardens, letting the different scents envelop him. Sometimes this would’ve pushed him into sensory overload, with all of the overlapping smells from the flowers, the sound of chirping birds, bright sunlight, breeze and stim toy, but today it just felt right. He hummed a familiar melody to himself, trying to place it as he wandered, spinning around and occasionally dancing with his steps.

His lips moved to words before he knew it, and he was finally able to place the song: Wake Up. Julie had written it with Rose before she passed away. A sad smile quirked the corners of her mouth. It had been a few years since it happened, but a pang of grief still struck Reggie’s heart. He’d lived at the palace since he was nine, and Rose had become like a mother to him. For seven years she’d raised him like one of her own, a kind, gentle woman. She was the one who taught him to play the bass, too. 

Reggie missed her. But Julie looked just like her, and she was so strong, his chest still swelled with pride every time he looked at her. And her voice, her music, it was like Rose in every way, and yet so uniquely Julie. 

The lyrics to Wake Up were so inspirational that, even when humming to himself in the gardens, they still brought the familiar prickle of tears to his eyes.

Better wake those demons // Just look them in the eye // No reason not to try

Those lines in particular were the most powerful to him. They were the lines that helped him confront his grief after Rose had passed away, and the ones that made his heart grow and ache every time Julie sang them. 

Reggie sighed, letting the memory of Rose wash over him, both melancholy and bright. Every step was filled with happiness and longing, but he knew that if it weren’t for her, he wouldn’t be the person he was today. He might’ve still lived in the palace with Julie, sure; it was Ray who had found him and taken him in. But Rose had guided his love for music with Julie. 

As he danced around the garden, a strong breeze whipped his hair. He noticed something flying towards him - a leaf, probably. But as he saw it flutter against the wind, he realized that it was a butterfly. 

Without thinking, he reached up, letting the butterfly stop against his palm. He shielded it from the wind with his other hand, letting it regain its balance. He giggled as it crawled across his finger, the faint tickling sensation like dandelion wisps on his nose in the Summer. Then, the butterfly took flight against the wind, this time able to push back and fly. 

…

Reggie, after finding his suit vest draped across a rosebush, wandered through the corridor to Alex’s room. He, Alex, and Luke had become close friends in the past week. Something about the three of them just clicked. 

He knocked on the door in a rhythmic pattern that matched with the song stuck in his head, sauntering in, the word treason filling his ears. A grin spread across his face; he knew exactly what the treason was.

“Did I hear something about treason?” he asked excitedly. “Because I am always down. Tell your friends; you need a treason buddy, I’m your guy. But of course, for legal reasons, that’s a joke.” He gave some finger guns when Alex snorted.

“Well,” Luke began, “the arranged marriage was already a major fuck-up on the council’s decision. We could add in some treason to the mix. Just for funsies.” Reggie nodded. He might’ve been seen as a goody-two-shoes to some people, but he wasn’t opposed to breaking some rules. 

“You just want to hang out with Julie, don’t you?” Alex asked. Luke flushed, and Reggie grinned. 

“Called it,” he said.

“Oh come on, you too?”

“Dude,” Reggie began. “I love you, but you’re not exactly subtle.” Luke pouted, and Alex cracked up. “You, on the other hand,” Reggie added, “I’m not sure who your treasonous crush is.” He knew Alex was gay, but there weren’t any guys he knew of that he would like. 

“A baker named Willie,” Luke interjected before Alex could reply. “And I still haven’t heard the story of how you met, I might add.” Alex groaned, and Reggie clapped. A baker. That was so cliche, but so adorable. He could already see the wedding.

“I assume there’s no way I’m getting out of this?”

“Not a chance,” Luke and Reggie replied in unison, and Reggie high-fived him without looking. Alex groaned.

“So, you remember the feast the night I got here? I was kinda overwhelmed so I stepped out the back door, and this guy just fuckin… Ran me over.” Reggie laughed. 

“He pancaked you!” 

“Exactly that. Anyway, that happened and I kinda froze because he was really cute. And eventually we were just… Chatting. And I can’t fucking get him out of my mind and now I’m royally fucked because this is treason.”

“Well, like I said, I’m always down for a little treason,” Reggie repeated. “And might I add, that is adorable!!!” 

“I know, right?” Luke asked, grinning at Reggie. He nodded enthusiastically. 

“It’s an adorable, treasonous meet-cute!!! I swear, this is like something out of a romance novel.”

“That’s what I thought!!!”

“You two are the worst,” Alex informed them.

“You love us,” Reggie said with a grin.

“Unfortunately.”

“Now, Luke. What’s this I hear about some more treasonous feelings for a certain Princess Julie Molina?” Reggie poked his friend in the ribs, laughing when his blush went all the way to his ears. 

“Uh, well, it’s not really feelings, plus, I doubt Reggie wants to hear about hypothetical feelings someone might have for his sister.”

“Wrong,” Reggie said. “I want to know everything.” There was no way he was getting away with crushing on his sister without Reggie doing some well-meaning meddling. He didn’t mind that Luke liked Julie, of course. He was a nice guy, and Julie clearly liked him as well. But, Luke was also one of his best friends, and therefore required to spill.

“See, I would explain, but the self-defense class starts in a minute-”

“Thirty,” Reggie corrected.

“Like I said, it starts in a minute, so I’d better run.” Without another word, he bolted out the door.

“You can’t keep running from your feelings forever,” Alex called to Luke.

“No, but I can run from you two goons!” Reggie cracked up, along with Alex. 

“Simp,” Reggie declared.

“Definitely.”

“Hey, you mentioned you play drums, right?”

“Yeah,” Alex said with a smile. “And you play… bass?”

“Yep! There’s a recording studio in the basement, you want to go play?”

“I’d love to! Luke keeps getting on my case because I tap on the desk when I’m working through sim files.” Reggie nodded. It was understandable for him as well; even though he wasn’t a drummer, he had ADHD, and sim files were such a pain. They were cool, sure; they were files in which you developed a country similar to Dahlia, and there were social issues, economic questions, political queries, all of which would affect how your practice country developed, even with the details of foreign relations. Reggie wasn’t bad at them, per se, but it was probably a good thing that he wasn’t becoming king. He always got distracted, and while he was quite good at it, especially diplomacy, it just wasn’t what he wanted to do. And it wasn’t a matter of ADHD, either. Julie had ADD. She was just better at it, maybe because she’d been raised for it since birth, and Reggie had lived here for a considerably short time compared to her. 

His most recent sim file was on economic development, concerning poverty, disproportionate wealth, and tax rates. Dahlian wealth was relatively evenly distributed; much better than some countries. But he just didn’t like the way the sim files were set up. 

…

“Dude, this is sick!” Alex’s enthusiasm was practically tangible, and Reggie smiled.

“I know, right? Just be careful not to touch the handshake prank things on the shelf,” he added, pointing to a small stash. “They’re Carlos’s. One time he added some static electricity and zapped me, and it felt just like the time I was fixing my amp in the rain.”

“You shouldn’t… Okay.” 

“Anyway, how do you like the drums?” Alex played a rhythm on the bass, snare, and hi-hat, grinning. 

“They’re awesome,” he decided. “In a lot better shape than my set back in Tambor. I’ve had them since I was seven, and they’re pretty beat-up.”

“Oof,” Reggie said. “These are a bit old, but none of us are any good at playing, so they’re just like new!” 

Reggie hopped across the room to grab his bass, strapping it around his shoulders and playing a riff. It started with a slide down the A string, and when he began adding more notes, Alex joined in with a rhythm. Reggie gasped.

“Alex, that sounds perfect!” When Alex gave him a confused look, Reggie realized he hadn’t given context. “Julie and I have been writing a song called Icarus, and trying to learn the drums to add in a beat, but that riff I was playing was the baseline for it, right? That beat you were just playing sounded perfect. Dude, we gotta get Jules in here later. She’s gonna be pumped.” Alex grinned.

“That sounds awesome, dude! What’s the song like?”

“It’s pretty upbeat,” Reggie started. “It’s got a sort of inspirational vibe to it. The guitar we’re trying to add has kind of a rock and roll sound, but not metal. I’m trying to figure out how to play it, but I always strum wrong since I’m so used to bass.” He laughed, remembering how he’d tried to strum with the outside of his index finger. 

“No way,” Alex said. Reggie gave him a confused look. “Luke plays guitar. He’s insane at it, too. What if the four of us played it? You on the bass, me on drums, Luke on guitar, and Julie on piano and vocals?”

“And you, Luke and I could be backup vocals! Alex, you’re a genius. We’ll be Julie’s Beyonce girls.”

“Yeah, okay.” Reggie grinned. This would be perfect. He just needed to get Julie and Julie’s Future Treasonous Boyfriend (Luke) to join them in the studio later. 

…

Self-defense was interesting to say the least. Reggie had the honor of watching his little sister teach a bunch of nervous trainees a move that, if he was being honest, was impossible to do for anybody but Julie. He only caught the last demonstrative round, though, which proved to be just as entertaining as watching her whole teaching session would be. 

Why? Well, because she was sparring with Luke. The tension was tangible as they ducked and dodged and struck, and as Julie ended up on top of him, his collar in her fist, a confident smirk on her face, Reggie grinned to himself at how oblivious they both were. They oozed chemistry. 

He approached as Lady Athena instructed the trainees to pair up and practice, and luckily caught the flustered and excited look on both Luke’s and Julie’s faces when Lady Athena paired them for sparring. He shot a knowing look at them as he paired with Mira to spar. 

They made idle conversation as they practiced, occasionally interrupted by a quick “duck” as the other sent a strike their way. 

“Did you know your sister was this oblivious?” Mira asked him. Reggie laughed. 

“Nope, though I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. She has a habit of ignoring things she doesn’t like, which probably includes treasonous emotions.” Mira laughed, and Reggie took advantage of it, flipping her over and pinning her, winning the match, laughing as she rolled her eyes but took his hand, pulling her up. 

“Believe me, I know,” Mira said. “She once got a sim file from a nearby sim country in her foreign relations packet that was questioning the ethics of her country on LGBTQ matters, and she just ignored it because it annoyed her.” Reggie snorted. That did sound like Julie. 

Twisting around Mira’s next attack, but quickly regretting it as she hooked her ankle around his knee, knocking him over and winning, Reggie wondered if he could somehow set them up.

“Hey, Mira?”

“Mhm?”

“You know how one of your jobs as Julie’s lady-in-waiting is to help arrange her outfits?” Mira nodded, a smirk growing on her face. 

“Say no more.” Reggie grinned. Reggie was his name, and meddling was his game. 

…

Reggie was working on a new riff for the bridge of Icarus when someone knocked on his door.

“Come in,” he called, still bent over his notebook, scrawling down notes as he hummed. 

“Hey, mijo?” Reggie whirled around to see Ray. He smiled. 

“Hi Ray! Everything okay?”

“Not exactly, but I’ll explain that later. We need you in the royal office. I’ve already been to see Julie, Luke, and Alex, they’re coming as well. Just… It might be a long night, so put on something respectable but comfortable.”

“Okay,” Reggie agreed, concerned. “Did something happen?” Ray bit his lip nervously and nodded, walking away without another word. 

----- 

Willie POV

...

“Hey, Alyssa, how’s that dough looking?” Willie asked from across the kitchen, where he was gathering ingredients for the Hawaiian style shredded chicken. 

“Almost done rising,” she called back. “Probably needs about five more minutes.”

“Awesome, thanks!”

“Yep!”

Willie gathered the ingredients in his arms, doing his best not to poke his eye out with the leaves of the pineapple. As he reached his counter, he set down the huge fruit, spreading out the other ingredients, many of them spices. He grabbed a knife from the block behind him, chopping the leaves off of the pineapple, then spinning it as he scalped the rough, pointy skin off as well. He chopped the rest into small pieces and brought them to Alyssa, who was in front of a large slow cooker with chicken inside. He set the bowl down on the counter, nodding from her thanks and running back to the dough, separating and rolling it to create rolls, sticking them in the oven. 

“Willie, why don’t you go on break,” Lilian suggested. Willie jumped; Lilian walked silently, and she’d appeared right behind him. 

“You’ve been working really hard today,” she added. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good! Thanks.” It was the truth, he was fine. But he was working extra hard today because, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t keep Alex off his mind. He always worked best when he had something else to think about; the actions practically did themselves. He hadn’t even realized how much he was doing.

“I think I’ll take you up on that break,” he decided. “Be back in an hour or so?” Lilian nodded, patting his shoulder. 

“Relax, child.”

“Who are you calling ‘child?’” he asked. “You’re only twenty-five.” 

“And you’re nineteen. You’re a child.” Willie rolled his eyes but laughed. 

“See you later!”

… 

As he ran out the door, leaving his apron swinging on a hook, who would he see but Alex? A grin broke out on his face and, despite his better judgement, he called out to him (after he’d settled his blush, of course).

“Hey there, your royal pancakeness!” He called, butterflies rising in his stomach as Alex looked his way.

“Hey, Willie! How’s it going?”

“Pretty good! Just got on break. You okay?” He asked, noticing the nervousness in Alex’s (beautiful) eyes.

“Oh, yeah,” Alex assured him. “Just walking.”

“Cool.” He fixed his hair, flipping it away from his shoulders. “You sure? You look a little dazed.”

I am too, but that’s just because you’re adorable.

“Just a little tired, I guess.” The lie was a classic one, and Willie saw right through it. He could tell that Alex didn’t want to talk about it, though so he left it alone. He always hated having people up in his business.

“Well, make sure you get some sleep tonight,” he told him. “In the meantime, I’m off to skate a little. You wanna come?” 

Willie wasn’t sure if Alex would say yes, no, or just walk away laughing. Skateboarding wasn’t something you would expect a prince to do. 

But then, Alex replied, “I’d love to,” and Willie’s grin stretched even wider, dearly hoping his cheeks weren’t as red as they felt.

“Sick! Follow me.”

He led Alex down the back of the corridor, thankful that Alex was behind him, because that meant he could let his gay panic show on his face without letting the person causing it know. His long hair blocked his jaw from view, as well, so he was confident that Alex was oblivious to the fact that Willie was currently aggressively mouthing cute boy cute boy cute boy. 

Willie took Alex’s hand, grinning when Alex smiled. He brought him out the back door, into the streaming sunlight and to the park in the gardens. Hardly anybody knew of its existence, which was just how Willie liked it. He’d been given permission to skate there, and never once had he seen another person there. Bringing Alex there felt strange, but right. This had become Willie’s area, where he would go to get away from people when he needed to, and now he was letting Alex in. He wasn’t quite sure what compelled him to do it, but he was glad he did. 

Willie shot him a glance, getting on the skateboard and flying down the sidewalks, jumping over metal rails and benches. He did a quick kickflip after he landed, skating back around the roundabout, his grin wide as ever as he made his way back to Alex.

“Want to try?”

“Oh, no,” Alex replied, “I’ve never actually skateboarded before, and I’m pretty sure I’d just look stupid.”

“You’ve never skated before?” Willie’s eyebrows knit together. He wasn’t necessarily surprised, given that Alex was a prince, but still, every boy he’d ever met had skateboarded. 

“Not once.” 

“Well, there’s an easy way to fix that,” Willie said with a grin, extending his hand as he stepped off the skateboard. His heart fluttered as Alex reluctantly took it, his hand cold but soft as he held on, stepping on. 

But before he could say anything, Alex was stepping onto it lopsidedly, and Willie instinctively ran around behind him, his hands bracing Alex’s shoulders as he fell. Willie had rather large hands, and as his thumbs stretched to his back, he felt Alex’s racing heartbeat. He knew it was because he’d almost fallen off of a skateboard, but he couldn’t help but grin.

“Oh, God, I’m so sorry,” Alex said. “I-

“No, bro, you’re good! Just glad I caught you,” Willie said. “You okay?” 

“Yeah,” Alex replied, and Willie tried (and failed) to calm his blush. He noticed a few freckles across Alex’s nose, barely there, like stars in the sky just after sunset. 

“Okay, let’s try this again.” Willie outstretched his hand again, and grinned when Alex took it, stepping on steadily, squeezing his hand. 

He liked this, holding hands with Alex. He could imagine doing this every day, casual affection, maybe playing with his hair- 

No. He shoved those thoughts out of his head. Alex was in an arranged marriage. To get in the way of that would be treason. Plus, Willie didn’t even know if Alex liked guys. 

“I did it!” Alex exclaimed, a grin on his face as he stood on the skateboard. Willie broke out into a huge smile, his chest swelling with pride. Alex was a nerd, but he was his nerd. 

“Hell yeah, dude! Want me to push you so you move?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Understandable, have a nice day.” Willie and Alex both cracked up, tears in his eyes. But he heard wobbling, and soon he was catching Alex right in front of him as he fell. Willie leaned back, stopping himself from falling on his back, but the main thing on his mind was how close he and Alex were. Their chests were pressed together, and Willie could barely tell whose racing heartbeat was his. He was close enough to count Alex’s long eyelashes, close enough to...

It was a nice thought, but it would never happen. 

Willie’s arms were wrapped around Alex’s waist, holding him steady as he stood up straighter, but not letting go. He held his gaze, steadying his breath, lost in Alex’s eyes. They were a mixture of blue, green, and grey, light but mysterious and beautiful, like frost on a garden, twinkling in moonlight. Without meaning to, his eyes flicked to Alex’s lips for a split second, and Willie could’ve sworn Alex’s did the same. 

Finally, Alex cleared his throat and stepped back. Willie wasn’t surprised, but he was disappointed. He liked holding Alex like that.

“Sorry, I kinda… Fell.” Willie cracked up at the bluntness.

“Yeah, I caught that. No pun intended.” He hated himself for the pun, but all of the hate was replaced with love when Alex let out a snort.

“That,” he said through giggles, “was so bad.” Willie blushed but laughed too, caught up in the mirth in Alex's eyes. He looked so young, laughing like this, free and happy. And when he’d finally composed himself, his cheeks were rosy from laughter, small lines around his eyes. 

It was official: Willie was smitten. 

-----

Julie POV

...

Julie groaned. 

It had been an entire week, and all of her interactions with Luke were minimal and cordial, but there was something in his eyes that she couldn’t shake. Every time he bowed, his eyes would flick up to meet hers, every time he smiled, they would crinkle and smile with his lips. Julie couldn’t get rid of these stupid feelings, no matter how hard she tried, no matter how many times she told herself that she was literally about to commit treason every time she was tempted to act. 

“That’s the fourth time you’ve groaned in the past ten minutes,” Flynn pointed out. “Care to tell us what’s going on?”

“Jules, we know something’s wrong. You can try to hide it all you want, but that won’t change it.” Carrie examined her perfect nails, which were painted gold and shimmered in the light. 

“I don’t know,” she lied. Flynn and Carrie shared a look. 

“Alright, what’s his name?” Julie bolted upright from her spot on her bed, flushed.

“What do you mean?” Her two friends shared another look and laughed. 

“You’re a horrible liar,” Carrie told her, “you know that?” Julie groaned a fifth time.

“So I’ll ask again,” Flynn decided. “What’s his name?” When Julie stayed silent, she added, “dude. You know that if anyone’s down for a little treason, it’s us.” She wasn’t wrong, and Julie knew that. Flynn was ride-or-die, Carrie too. Neither of them would hesitate before committing war crimes if it meant helping Julie, and she didn’t take that for granted. She was still emotional about it, though.

“You know Alex’s guard, Luke?”

“The one who was showering you in compliments at self-defense last week?” Flynn asked, a shit-eating grin on her face. 

“He complimented me once, Flynn.” 

“Tell yourself whatever you need to.”

“I think I will.”

Carrie snorted. “Jules, you clearly like him. Make a move!”

“Carrie,” Julie said calmly. “I say this with love. Are you out of your mind?” 

“I mean, probably.” Flynn cracked up and Carrie’s perfect face had a smug little smile that pissed Julie off. She flopped back down. 

“This whole thing sucks.”

“You’re not wrong,” Flynn agreed, though she still had a grin on her face. “You know what would help?”

“Treason?” Carrie suggested. 

“Nope! Well, yes, but I was going to say getting ready for self-defense. Lady Athena wanted us to go early today, remember?” 

Unfortunately, Julie did remember, and she was dreading it. Lady Athena had asked if she could practice her upside-down move some more, and then show it to the training guards, plus a demonstrative spar with each of the other three girls to show how to use it against different fighting styles. 

Before she could respond, Mira walked in, piles of fabric in her arms. 

“Who’s ready to go?” She asked enthusiastically. “I just had these tailored,” she said, putting down the fabric, which turned out to be matching athletic clothes. Soft, high-waisted capris leggings, with matching tops that were slim-fitting and cropped at the ribs. The halter neckline was gentle and hemmed, nothing fancy or tied. 

“They should be nice and cool so you don’t get too sweaty,” Mira explained, “and they’re form-fitting to make movement easier.” She handed a set to Julie, violet in color. Carrie’s was hot pink, and Flynn’s was jade green. Mira wore a sky blue set. 

“Mira, have I mentioned that you’re the best lady-in-waiting ever?” Julie asked, a huge grin spreading on her face. 

“Not in the last five minutes.” 

…

As she walked into the training arena, flanked by Flynn, Mira, and Carrie, Julie pulled her hair into a ponytail, giving Lady Athena a grin. 

“Alright, ready to show these guys how it’s done?” she asked confidently, her bronze skin shimmering in the light. Julie nodded. Lady Athena patted Julie’s shoulder and turned back to the group of about twenty young people, ranging from about thirteen to twenty, of all genders. She scanned the eyes, recognizing some of them from her previous self-defense classes, before she stopped on a pair of hazel ones. 

Luke wasn’t with the group of trainees, rather standing on the sidelines. Without thinking, Julie approached him. 

“Hey Luke!” His cheeks flushed. 

“Hey, Julie, what’s up?”

“Not much,” she replied. “Just came early because Lady Athena wanted me to show the trainees my upside-down move.” She fidgeted, tightening her ponytail. “Why are you here? The main session doesn’t start for another thirty minutes.”

“Oh,” he said with a shy laugh. “Alex and Reggie were giving me shit for… something, and I decided to escape.” Julie caught his slip, but didn’t say anything.

“That’s valid.” 

“Julie?” Called Lady Athena. “You ready?”

“That’s my cue,” she said, hopping away and over to stand next to the coach. Her eyes travelled to Flynn, Carrie, and Mira, who were standing behind the eager trainees, all giving her The Look and glancing at Luke. Julie gave them a quick death stare, before going back to smiling at the trainees. 

“Okay, everyone,” Lady Athena called, quieting the chatter amongst the group. “Princess Julie is here to show us a new move she came up with. We haven’t come up for it yet, have we?”

“No, not yet,” Julie responded. “But I’m working on it. Oh, and you can all call me Julie.” 

“Right. So, Julie here is going to demonstrate the move, first on her own, then with a few other people she’s brought, to show how it works against different fighting styles. Julie?”

“Okay,” she said, clapping her hands nervously. “So, the first thing is knowing when to do it. You generally do it when your opponent has you in a position where you have to lean forward.” She demonstrated, bending a bit forward. “Then, you jump, land on your hand - and it’s important that it’s the hand that matches the direction you’re facing. If you lean forward to the right, your opponent’s left, you jump on your right hand, and vice versa. Then, you spin by using momentum in your hips. This is mostly to distract them. Then, after the initial spin, you spin again, but rather than upright, you bend your elbow, lean like this-” she went through the previous moves then leaned to the side, putting down her leg to hold herself in the same position- “and spin, swinging your legs behind your opponent’s ankles to trip them backwards.” She demonstrated that bit as well, as slow as she could while still doing it correctly. “Then once they’re down, you use your spinning momentum to get on top of them and finish the fight.”

As she stood back up, she noted the confused or scared looks on the trainees’ faces, as well as an approving smile from Lady Athena and silent applause from Flynn, Mira, and Carrie- and Luke. At some point during her demonstration, he’d made his way over to her friends, and they were quietly chatting as she moved. 

“That looks really hard,” one of the trainees piped up, “but super badass.” If there was a way to verbally keysmash, Julie did it.

“Thanks so much!!! Though I should tell you, the first time I did it was completely by accident, and I sprained my wrist doing the initial spin. Afterwards, the only reason I tried it again was because Flynn bet me I couldn’t.” She shot a glance at her best friend, and her smirk and nod make her laugh. “But eventually,” she continued, “Lady Athena saw me trying to do it and gave me some tips, and one thing led to another, and here we are.” 

After a few moments of stunned silence, Lady Athena spoke. 

“Okay, Julie, why don’t you get some water, and we’ll do the demonstrations with opponents?”

“Sounds good.” She spun on her heel, jogging over to her friends, ignoring the butterflies as she caught Luke’s eye. 

“Dude, I don’t know how you managed to do that spin in slow motion,” Mira told her. Julie laughed.

“Practice and good core strength.” She sat down on the bench, Mira by her side. 

“Hey, uh, Julie?” asked Luke. She was guzzling water, so she hummed a questioning tone. “Would it be okay if I joined them and tried to learn the move?” he asked, gesturing his head to the group of preparing trainees. Julie put down her water bottle, smirking, a sudden bubble of confidence welling up inside her.

“Technically, you’re not a trainee. But, you could be one of the demonstrative opponents if you want to,” she offered. “I’m supposed to show how the move works against different fighting styles, and I think a Tamborian fighting style would add some variety,” she reasoned, ignoring Carrie’s eyebrow wiggle from behind Luke. 

His cheeks flushed, but he nodded with a grin.

“Sounds good, boss.” Julie flushed at the nickname. 

…

As she sparred with Carrie, she spoke between her moves.

"See, Carrie fights like a dancer. She's graceful and quick-" she dodged a blow from the girl, taking the opportunity to jump on her hand and twist, spinning and quickly tripping Carrie- "but not quick enough. No opponent is going to expect you to pull a breakdancing move on them." As she got on top of Carrie, pressing her elbow across her shoulders and pinning her down, a grin spread across her face. 

Julie got up and extended her hand to Carrie, who took her forearm and Julie took hers, pulling her up. 

Mira was up next. She jumped into a fighting position, her flaming red hair swinging behind her. Julie smirked, making the first blow.

"Mira, on the other hand, fights like a ninja. She's lithe and graceful, but deadly." Julie leaned forward, spinning on her hand and tripping Mira, quickly pouncing over her to win, before helping her up again. Next, Flynn.

Flynn made the first move, striking near Julie's shoulder, she bolted out of the way, turning to strike back. 

"Flynn is catlike when she fights," Julie explained, dodging another blow. "She's light on her feet and quick, with amazing reflexes. However-" she jumped and spun on her hand, tripping Flynn and ending the fight- "it turns out, cats don't always land on their feet." She shot Flynn a wink. 

She glanced at Luke, whose cheeks were bright red, but he had a confident smile on his face. Julie grinned.

"Next I'm going to fight with Luke. He's from Tambor, so this will be new." She gestured with a quick nod for him to come over.

As Julie stepped into fighting position, Luke winked. Julie ignored the butterflies in her stomach, overwhelmed with confidence as Luke struck. She dodged and blocked, striking back any chance she had. 

Luke was surprisingly competent, but very opportunistic, which Julie took advantage of. As he lost his balance, she spun upside down and tripped him, quickly using her momentum to get on top of him, pinning his hips with her leg. She grabbed his collar and pulled her fist back in a final move, but froze. It was just training, after all. 

Now it was Julie's turn to wink, which seemed to fluster Luke even more. 

They stayed like that for a few seconds before Julie got up, outstretching her hand to Luke. He took her forearm and she took his, pulling him up. 

“Nice job!” she told him. 

“Oh, please, I just got my ass kicked and you didn’t even break a sweat.” Luke rubbed the back of his neck. “I knew you were awesome, but I didn’t know you were a human wrecking ball.” Julie flushed, stammering. 

“I- well, I don’t-”

“He’s right,” Carrie insisted. You were awesome.” And God, Julie wished Luke hadn’t grinned at Carrie’s agreement, because he had the cutest eyes ever. Honestly, it should’ve been illegal. Her first order of business when she was crowned queen would be to make it illegal to fluster her. 

“Okay, trainees,” called Lady Athena. “Pair up and spar. If you want, spot the other and try the move. I’ll be hovering to make sure nobody gets hurt.” She clapped her hands with finality, and the trainees did as they were told. “The rest of you,” she added, directed at Julie and her group, “practice while you can. Oh, Julie, I want you to practice with Luke today. See if you can work out some similarities and differences between Dahlian and Tamborian fighting styles.”

Julie nodded, ignoring the way her heart pounded, ignoring how Luke started fidgeting, and especially ignoring the incredibly annoying looks from Mira, Flynn, Carrie, and Reggie, who had just popped in to join. 

Digest those butterflies, Molina. D i g e s t  t h e m. 

“Alright, boss,” Luke said after a moment. “Ready to kick my ass?” Julie laughed. 

“Let’s do it.”

Luke struck first, a playful grin on his face. Julie quickly deflected, twisting his arm and twirling behind him, gently (since it was training, and he was cute) shoving the backs of his knees and pinning him as he fell down, kneeling hunched over with Julie holding his wrists behind his back. 

“That’s one for me!” She laughed as he groaned. 

“Damn, and to think I ever thought I was good at hand-to-hand,” he said with a grin. Julie blushed and helped him up. “Wait, I want to try that spinny move thing.” Julie stepped back, letting Luke jump onto his hand, but as soon as he spun, he fell.

“Gah, my wrist!” Julie rushed over to where Luke was now sitting, reaching out to help him-

Then, that little shit grinned and grabbed her arm, pulling her down and spinning on top of her, pinning her shoulders.

He shot her a cocky grin. “And that’s one for me.” Julie rolled her eyes, hating the way her heart was fluttering. 

“That wouldn’t work in a real fight, you know.” She rolled out from under him, fixing her hair. 

“Oh, I know,” he said in a relaxed manner. “It’s just fun to annoy you.” Julie’s stupid heart fluttered again, and she looked away, sure her face was on fire.

“Alright, rematch.” Luke nodded, and Julie hopped into fighting position. Luke did the same, and Julie didn’t hesitate to strike. She moved quickly, remembering her forms and the movements that Lady Athena had drilled into her since she could walk. She spun, aiming for Luke’s shoulder. When he leaned to the side to dodge, she jumped onto her hand, twirling and tripping him- 

Or, she tried to. 

Luke had completely jumped over her legs, anticipating the move. She really shouldn’t have been surprised, but it caught her off guard. She tried to recompose herself, but Luke was quicker than he looked, and had grabbed her arm, spinning her with her back against his chest and his forearm across her shoulders, pressing tight enough to prove that he’d won, but not as hard as he would’ve if it were a real fight. If it had been real, his arm would’ve been over her throat, anyways. Julie could feel his heartbeat between her shoulder blades, and it sent a shiver down her spine. 

“I win,” he said softly, but Julie could hear the shit-eating grin behind the words. She smirked to herself. No way was she going down that easy. 

Before Luke could move, she reached with her arm and grabbed his wrist from its place near her collarbone, bending forwards and throwing him over her shoulder. As his back hit the ground, she spun, pressing her forearm against his shoulders and flattening herself over him so he couldn’t move. 

“Actually, I win.” 

…

“Okay,” Flynn said after everyone had changed and gathered back in Julie’s room. “If you can’t tell by now that Luke is in love with you, I don’t know what else to do.”

“Flynn. He’s not in love with me, nor am I in love with him.” Flynn, Carrie, and Mira all shared a look and laughed. But before Julie could respond, a knock echoed on her door.

“Come in.” Julie smiled as her dad walked into her room. “Hey dad! Everything okay?” she asked when she noticed the crease between his eyebrows.

“Not exactly.” 

“Uh oh,” she replied, standing up. 

“We need you in the royal office.” Julie’s stomach dropped. “Your friends can come if they would like,” he added, shooting a kind but worried glance at Flynn, Mira, and Carrie, “but this is a tense situation, and they would be required to keep it all classified.”

“We can do that,” Carrie said, a single crease between her brows. Mira and Flynn nodded. Julie couldn’t shake the nervousness in her stomach.

“Did I do something?”

“No, no, don’t worry, mija. Está bien, it’s nothing that you did. But it’s not good. Just… put on something respectable but comfortable. It might be a long night.” He turned to walk out the door, but Julie grabbed his sleeve. 

“Papá, ¿qué pasó?” Ray sighed. 

“Do you remember Caleb Covington? He’s the king of Krypto.”

“Yeah, but it’s been awhile.” Ray sighed again, the crease between his eyebrows deepening.

“The kingdom of Krypto has declared war on Dahlia.”

[st-just]

Semi-coherent Queen’s Gambit thoughts

Overall I really did enjoy the show, even if it might be a bit shallow, once you dig into it. Or, well,, having thought about it I could write a damning denunciation on request, anyway (but that’s true of basically everything I watch, so). Aesthetically gorgeous, of course. But honestly, what’s most interesting to me is how, like, deceptively upbeat and optimistic and generally joyful show it is?

Okay, so firstly – I really do mean it when I say it’s aesthetically beautiful. This show has singlehandidly convinced me that every change in fashion since the ‘60s has been a strict downgrade. The soundtrack’s absolutely sublime as well, both the licensed tracks and just the score – I’m almost certainly going to just be listening to the soundtrack as walking around music for quite a while. I’m no expert on cinematography, but there were a few scenes that were absolutely just showing off, and I sure as hell enjoyed the show (the American championship montage, obviously, and the pull-out in the Moscow hotel. And, well, pretty much every important chess game/tournament). Anna Taylor-Joy absolutely makes the show, and literally anyone whose watched more than two minutes of it probably agrees. Has one of those faces that is just amazing at getting across emotions and ideas without actually saying anything (and without looking like an idiot trying to do so). Really, the comparison that springs to mind is Mathew Rhys and Kerri Russel in The Americans, which is just about the highest praise I, personally, can give. So, yeah, give her and the people in costuming and set design Emmys, at a minimum.

And – getting critiques out of the way, in descending order of how much I care. Jolene is absolutely the most stereotypically Black Best Friend sort of character imaginable, and the conversation where she basically looks at the camera and says she doesn’t just exist to be Beth’s guardian angel doesn’t actually help that much. Beth finally summoning up the self belief and willpower to flush away her lifelong pill habit in the middle of a tournament and playing the next day without any sort of problems was a bit twee. Between the show’s utterly despair inducing vision of the life the women Beth went to school with have and Julie’s whole vitriolic anti-model spiel the show can come off a bit #notlikeothergirls (incidentally, whoever got the French a national stereotype of being sexy, well-dressed and sophisticated deserves a bigger statue in Paris). And, yeah, it’s not unjustifiable or even, like, unusually bad, but Beth hitting rock bottom does end up looking a lot like a playboy spread.

But, okay – when I say the series is remarkably upbeat what I mostly (magical addiction-curing character development aside) mean is that the world (or at last, the world of chess) is shown as fundamentally uplifting, kind, and pure. The conflict of the show is either the result of forced interactions with the rest of society, or Beth struggling with her own damage. Her birth mother and father, the orphanage, her utter piece-of-shit of an adoptive father, the other girls at school – these are all, broadly, terrible. But chess itself is an entirely positive part of her life, and while some of the people she meets through it are rude or condescending at first, they basically all very quickly grow to respect her and become extremely invested in her well-being and success (her relationship with her adoptive mother also becomes more positive and loving basically entirely in proportion to how supportive she is of Beth’s chess career). All of her rivals turn out to be gracious losers and perfect gentleman, and also usually fall in love with her (which, well, fair), and the closest things the series has to a defined, hateable villain (beyond Beth’s self-destructive tendencies) is her adoptive father,  not anyone in the chess world that consumes the vast majority of the plot.

The show’s take on gender roles and period-appropriate patriarchy. There is, to borrow and probably butcher (I believe) Kate Manne’s there is quite a lot of sexism in the show, but almost no misogyny. Which is to say, Beth has to deal with plenty of condescension, double-standards, suffocating expectations, and generally being being looked at askance, and the show is absolutely crystal clear that actually living up to those expectations is a miserable, soul-crushing, dream-killing husk of a life. But when she ignores them and demands to be accepted as a serious chess-player, once she shows that she’s as good as she acts like she is, everyone just, well, lets her. There’s no enforcement mechanism to the patriarchy, or if there is Beth is too exceptional to ever even see it. And no one ever becomes hateful or violently insecure when shown up by her – quite the opposite, really.

Semi-related, but for a show set during the Cold War it’s got an oddly positive view of the Soviet Union. Benny’s rant about how people actually care about chess and give it prestige, and how chess players there actually work together and cooperate instead of being obsessed with individual achievement (which the rest of the show goes on to make very clear is a virtue and something worth copying). There was a bit in the last episode along the same lines that actually made me smile – when the State Department/CIA goon asks Beth to tell the reporters how being in Moscow has made her proud to be an American, when she clearly (imo) is rather fond of the sudden adoring crowds and the reverence her sport is treated with.

Beyond jokes about the there being another universe 10 degrees off from this one where the whole thing is a VN where you beat each potential love interest in chess to unlock them, the comparison that comes to mind is honestly Among Others by Jo Walton. Not for, like, tone or subject matter or anything, but just for the general arc of ‘Weird Girl in mid 20th century deals with horrifying childhood trauma and alienation from the social life expected of her by diving headfirst into nerdy/esoteric subculture”.

But yeah, anyway, gorgeous, enjoyable show. Would watch again. Give Taylor-Joy an Emmy. Thank you again to @triviallytrue and @rox-and-prose for the recommendation.