#i love when musicals talk about divorce
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Jason at the beginning of his first therapy session with Mendel: I'm worried about how similar I am to my biological father, my mother's first husband
Jason at the end of his fifth and last therapy session with Mendel: are you going to marry my mom or what? And if so, what are your husbandly qualities?
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sometimes my bestfriend is like an angel in disguise istg
#i was justttttt thinking that aw it's so sad that navratri music is playling everywhere and i don't have friends to go with#like last year atleast i had tuition sorta friends but now ive isolated them too it sucks#but i was like well it's okay ill do it when i grow up celebrate every festival i didn't get to in my house because we just never do#and then she calls and she's like let's go this club jahan every year famous hota hai full celebration#and i was like ehh i don't want to i don't even know how to play and ill have to convince dad for raat can't we just#go to a cafe or something dopahar mein uske liye i don't even need permission#and she even agreed but she sounded sad and disappointed about it so i was like well fuck it you want to go club na#and she was like yeahhh so i was like aagh okay and i asked and we're going tomorrow!!!!!#and it's so ridiculous like i just say i don't want to go but it's actually so exciting to go someplace other than a cafe!!!!#and i was complaining to her ki okay ill go but i won't dress up and five mins later me and mumma are making full outfit with dupatta#style decided jewellery she has saved for years that are specifically navratri types and she's like we'll get my blouse altered it's fine#you know being sick has really given me perspective on my parents#im not going to hate my mom anymore i never used to growing up i always thought she was brave but helpless#but a stupid day in 12th i realised when we were talking that technically she COULF get divorced she just#doesn't want to because she'll be alone and she thinks we're growing up and leaving anyway so why should she let go of financial#stability for us. which is wild to me because girl you can't buy anything you want without his permission so i don't understand what's the#point if he's rich or poor but whatever whatever she's been raised this way etc etc#but anyway being sick really made me realise who the real monster is😭 all dad did was shout horribly at me all the time#and was like don't you dare take meds they're fake this is all just junk food stop eating it and you'll be fine. when i was literally#having 103 FEVER.#and mom was the one who was making me different drinks juices cutting up fruits staying with me as i get my blood drawn#checking my fever sote jaagte#like wow i literally wouldn't have gotten better if it wasn't for her and i couldn't believe how attentive and nice she was being#like yes i understand she just thinks this is her duty she's just playing her role a mother a housewife but still#idk i just realized that okay atleast she's good at being a mother dad isn't even that why am i feeling good about him when his love#not even love his politeness is so fucking conditional#and mom healed me even tho i told her about clubbing and drinking lots of alcohol she's kinda against it because she's seen#horrible things in life family yucky men but still she understands ans trusts my sister mostly and know we just do it for fun and she#wasn't even mad!!!!!!! like wow ooay#moms love is actually not conditional for the first time in my life i felt like if i fall maybe she could be there to catch me and dad wld
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The Weight of Choices
Pairing: Ex-husband!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Warnings: 18+ only. Smut. Unprotected sex, dirty talk, slight dom! Bucky. A little angst.
Summary: Torn between his instinct to protect his family and his desire to be a part of their lives, Bucky tries to deal with the reality of his ex-wife going on a date while he stays home caring for their son.
Word Count: About 8.9k.
He was late. If Y/n didn’t know better, she’d think he was doing it on purpose. Bucky had agreed to watch their son tonight so she could go on a date, the third one since their divorce two years ago. The last couple of times, she’d managed to find a friend to babysit, but Saturday nights were always tough. So in the end, she had no choice but to come clean and ask Bucky.
She could still hear his voice from that awkward phone call, his tone edged with surprise when she’d told him she had plans.
“A date?” he repeated, the edge of disbelief hard to miss.
"Yeah," she’d replied casually, but Bucky’s silence lingered longer than usual. He hated texting, so phone calls had become their norm, even for the smallest of things.
“With who?” His attempt to sound nonchalant fell flat, the tension threading through every word.
“Chris,” she said, keeping her tone light, “You know, the music teacher at the kindergarten where I work? Blonde, easy smile... we walked past him once when he was out with his dog, Dodger.”
Bucky scoffed, the bitterness in his voice unmistakable. “I knew it. I knew he had a thing for you.”
She rolled her eyes, exasperated. “Oh, please.”
“Every time I’d drop by the kindergarten, he’d just… linger. His eyes followed you the whole time like he couldn’t look away. People don’t stare like that unless they’re thinking something. And the way he’d smile, all soft and attentive, he was trying too hard to be just a ‘friendly co-worker.” His voice had dropped a notch, irritation creeping in.
“Are you serious?” she shot back, incredulous. But Bucky wasn’t done.
“How long’s this been going on?” The question came out more like an accusation.
“It’s our first date. You know I only recently started dating again,” she replied, her patience wearing thin.
He paused, clearly unsatisfied. “So what, he’s just been waiting for his chance, ready to pounce-”
“I’m going to stop you right there, James,” she interrupted, her tone firm. “You’re not entitled to know anything about my love life the moment you decided you wanted the divorce.”
There was an uncomfortable silence on the line. She could hear him breathing, the tension stretching between them, until finally, he sighed.
“You’re right,” he admitted quietly. “I’m sorry, that was out of line. I’ll take care of Benjamin on Saturday night.”
The recall of the conversation was interrupted by Ben, who wanted to show her what he did with his Legos.
Bucky had been sitting in front of the house for half an hour now. Sometimes, like tonight, he regretted what he’d done, but deep down, he knew it had been necessary. After the terrifying incident when Hydra agents attempted to kidnap their son, hoping to test if any of the serum’s powers had been passed down genetically, he realized that his past would eventually catch up with them. He had to make sure they were safe, even if it meant tearing apart everything they’d built.
He knew she wouldn’t understand if he told her the truth. If he had laid out his fears and his guilt and spiraled into a self-deprecating parade like he always did, she would have fought him and convinced him to stay. So he waited.
He knew the only way to make her believe it, was to weave in just enough truth to his argument, so, slowly he began pulling away, setting the stage for what would be his ultimate break. Late nights, distant conversations, an almost non-existent sexual life and missed moments with their son, all led to this. He needed her to see that the life they had wasn’t something he could carry anymore.
When the moment came, he didn’t hesitate. He told her he felt suffocated by their life together. That the roles of husband and father were more than he could bear after everything he had been through. She didn’t believe him at first, and he could see the determination in her eyes, the will to fight for what they had.
So, he played the card he knew would make her stop fighting him. He spoke of the years he’d spent as a puppet, how he had never truly known freedom, never had control over his life. He appreciated everything she had done for him, all the love and support she had given, but it wasn’t enough. He needed air, space to figure out who he was beyond the roles he had been forced into. He made it sound like staying with her, staying in the family they’d built, was just another form of captivity.
It crushed her. Bucky could see the moment her resistance faded. She believed him, not because she wanted to, but because he made it seem so real. So she stood there, heartbroken, but unable to argue against the logic he’d presented.
The first months after the divorce were hard on both parts. For her, that time was the hardest, filled with sleepless nights and the nagging feeling that Bucky had simply abandoned her, walked away from their life, their love, without a second thought. She wrestled with the confusion and the heartbreak, trying to piece together where things had gone wrong. For Bucky, it was a different kind of suffering. He bore the weight of his decision in silence, knowing he had walked away to protect them, but that didn’t ease the sting of loneliness or the guilt that gnawed at him.
Their lives moved on separately. They saw each other only in passing, and even that was rare. Bucky would pick up Benjamin directly from daycare once a week, dropping him off the next morning before heading back to his life, careful to avoid lingering long enough for awkward conversations. Sometimes he didn’t make it at all, missing his time with his son when missions pulled him away. Immersing himself in his work was easier than facing what he had left behind, the family he still wanted but couldn’t allow himself to have. Meanwhile, she did her best to create some normalcy for Benjamin, even as the space Bucky left behind echoed through their small home.
Even though their lives had drifted apart, Bucky never truly let go. He kept his distance, but never far enough to lose sight of them. Unbeknownst to her, he knew everything that went on in the household, the daily rhythms of their life, the way she struggled and adapted to her new normal without him. From the shadows, Bucky lurked unnoticed in the neighborhood, always keeping an eye on them. She never noticed, never had a clue that even when he was away on missions, he somehow knew when Benjamin caught a cold or when she had a rough day at work.
It was a secret vigil that gave him a twisted sense of comfort, knowing they were safe even if they no longer shared the same home. He would catch fleeting glimpses of her tucking their son into bed or hear his faint laughter playing in the yard. It was enough to remind him of what he’d lost, but not enough to bring him back to the life he believed he couldn’t have.
That was why Bucky was caught off guard when she mentioned her date with that guy, the music teacher. He never saw that coming. He had always known the man had a soft spot for her, could see it in the way he acted whenever she was around, how he lingered a little longer during pick-ups at the kindergarten, helping to manage the children even if it wasn’t his job, always with an excuse to retain her and talk. His body language was an open book. But back then, Bucky had dismissed him as harmless, barely giving him a second thought. To him, Chris had always been like a friendly Labrador: approachable, with no bite. A non-threat.
But now, that harmless Labrador had grown fangs. The guy wasn’t just hanging around the edges anymore; he was stepping in, taking her to dinner, moving into a space Bucky had once occupied. And he had no choice but to suck it up and watch it happen, watch her walk out the door with him. He could handle the distance, the brief moments of tension when they had to interact, but this? The idea of Chris sitting across from her at a candlelit table, making her laugh, holding her gaze... it twisted his guts.
And God knows what else would happen after dinner. Would Chris try to kiss her goodnight? Would she let him? Or worse, would they end up back at his place? His mind ran wild with the possibility of them taking things further, crossing a line he never wanted to imagine. Would she let him touch her in ways Bucky used to, let him see sides of her only he had known? He knew he had no right to feel this way, but it didn’t stop the thoughts from torturing him.
Eventually, he glanced at the clock and sighed, raking a hand through his hair. There was no point in torturing himself any further, he couldn’t postpone the inevitable any longer.
Reaching the front porch, Bucky hesitated for a moment. He straightened his posture adjusting his clothes, then knocked on the door. As he waited, he shifted his weight from one foot to the other, trying to shake off the tension.
When the door finally swung open, for a split second, neither of them spoke. Her eyes widened just a little, her lips parting as she took him in. It had been a long time since she’d seen him. His hair had grown back to shoulder length, a few strands falling loose across his forehead. A three-day stubble sharpened his jawline, in a way that made him look rugged and effortlessly handsome. And was he wearing that shirt? The red and black lumberjack one that used to drive her wild?
Bucky caught her reaction and hit him like a shot of adrenaline. When he exited the bathroom that night and picked what to wear, he told himself it was just practical, something comfortable to wear while watching and playing with Ben. The cologne? Just a habit. But deep down, a part of him knew the truth: he wanted her to notice, and that split-second when her eyes widened, scanning him from head to toe, told him everything. She noticed. She definitely noticed. And something about that felt like a victory, even though he wasn’t supposed to be playing that game anymore.
He stared at her longer than necessary, his blue gaze drifting over the black dress she wore. New, he realized. It hugged her body in all the right places, accentuating her curves in a way that was impossible to ignore. The hemline? Too short for his liking. He clenched his jaw slightly, knowing full well Chris would be thrilled to see her like this.
Forcing himself to snap out of it, Bucky cleared his throat and broke the silence. “Hey,” he said, his voice low and calm, though the tension still simmered beneath the surface. “You look... good.” He meant it, but the words tasted bitter.
"Thanks," she said, her tone polite but distant, deliberately choosing not to compliment him back. She lingered for a moment, then added, “You’re late.”
Bucky flinched inwardly at the remark, though he kept his expression neutral. "Traffic," he muttered, stepping inside as she moved aside to let him in. An awkward silence settled between them, the air thick with things left unsaid.
Her fingers toyed with the edge of her dress as she cleared her throat, trying to fill the silence. “Ben is in the bathroom,” she said, her voice casual, but there was a tension beneath it. “You can wait for him in the living room.”
“Right,” Bucky replied, nodding stiffly. He walked past her and into the living room, the space feeling both familiar and foreign at the same time. He took a seat, trying to shake off the strange energy between them, but his mind kept wandering back to the fact that she was dressed for someone else.
A moment later, the doorbell rang, and she turned toward the sound, visibly relieved. She opened the door, and Bucky heard Chris’s voice, a cheerful greeting that she surely responded to with a soft, warm smile. Bucky didn’t need to see it, her tone was different with him, softer, more open.
“Hey,” Chris said, his voice bright, though there was a subtle shift when he paused. There was a beat of silence before he added, “You look amazing.”
Bucky couldn’t help it. Something pulled him from the couch, and before he knew it, he was standing in the hall, watching the interaction from a few feet away. His eyes narrowed as he observed Chris, sizing him up instinctively. Chris was taller than he remembered, clean-cut in a casual but neat button-down shirt, his easy smile faltering just a fraction when his eyes darted past her, catching sight of Bucky standing there.
Chris’s brows furrowed, but he quickly masked his reaction, giving Bucky a curt nod. “Uh, hey,” he greeted awkwardly, glancing between them.
It was her turn to narrow her eyes. Glancing back over her shoulder, she saw him. Bucky stood at the edge of the hallway, staring directly at Chris, his expression unreadable. His eyes locked onto the man without blinking. He wasn’t moving, wasn’t saying anything, just staring.
Inwardly, she rolled her eyes. Really? A display of male dominance, here and now? After everything he’d put her through, the mess he’d made of their lives, he suddenly decided he had the right to act territorial? What exactly did he think he was entitled to? The nerve of it sent a wave of irritation through her, tightening her grip on her coat.
But what frustrated her even more -what really troubled her- was that a part of her didn’t mind. Beneath her annoyance, something stirred, deep and undeniable, lurking just beneath the surface. She hated to admit it, even to herself, but his presence still had a hold on her. Maybe it didn’t bother her as much as she wanted to believe. Maybe, despite everything, there was still a part of her that reacted to him, to the way he watched her, the way he used to make her feel like the center of his world.
Before those feelings could rise any further, before she could let herself dwell on what they meant, she quickly turned back to Chris. She forced a bright smile, pushing away the conflicted thoughts swirling in her mind.
“We should get going,” she said, her voice light, pretending not to notice the tension still hanging in the air. She stepped closer to Chris, signaling it was time to leave, hoping to put some distance between her and the weight of Bucky’s gaze.
As the door clicked shut behind them, Bucky stood frozen in place for a moment, the tension that had gripped him not easing, even with their absence. The quiet of the house felt heavier now, pressing down on him. His chest tightened as he stared at the closed door, half-expecting her to walk back in. Of course, she didn’t.
His hands clenched into fists at his sides as he replayed the scene in his head: her standing there, beautiful and confident, and Chris… that guy was so normal, so easygoing. Exactly what she deserved. Exactly what Bucky could never be. He raked a hand through his hair, frustration bubbling to the surface. What was he even doing? He had no right, he was the one who walked away. He was the one who made her believe she wasn’t enough to keep him, that he wanted out. And now, here he was, silently raging because she was moving on, exactly like he supposedly wanted.
Stupid. That was the only word he could come up with to describe how he felt. Stupid for showing up looking the way he did, stupid for thinking that maybe, just maybe, he could still affect her. But what for? His job was to protect her and their son from the shadows, not to stand in the doorway, playing the part of some jealous lover. But God, it hurt more than he expected.
He crossed the living room, his steps heavy against the floor, and slumped into the couch. The house was eerily quiet, save for the faint sound of the TV in the background. Ben was still in the bathroom, probably playing with the liquid soap and making a mess, unaware of the tangled web of emotions his father was caught in.
The hours slipped by, though Bucky barely noticed at first. Benjamin was beyond excited to have his dad all to himself for the evening. They played, joked, and built elaborate lego fortresses, the boy’s laughter filling the house with a warmth Bucky hadn’t realized he missed so much. For a little while, he was able to shove everything else to the back of his mind. Being a dad, just a dad, felt like a relief. But every now and then, his gaze would drift to the clock on the wall. He couldn’t help it. As much as he tried to stay in the moment with his son, there was a lingering pull, a constant, nagging thought of where she was.
After he’d put Ben to bed, Bucky’s mind wandered back to the date. The image of her in that black dress haunted him, the way Chris had looked at her, the possibility of what might have happened after dinner. His thoughts spiraled, even though he knew it was none of his business anymore. He poured himself a scotch, the amber liquid swirling in his glass as he tried -and failed- to push the thoughts aside.
Eventually, the sound of the front door opening cut through the quiet. The familiar click of her shoes against the entryway tile echoed through the house, sharp and distinct. She was home.
Bucky didn’t move. He stayed where he was, seated at the old teakwood table, nursing his scotch. The only light on in the house was the dim glow above the kitchen, so she’d find him.
The sound of her footsteps grew closer, and he listened intently, his heart beating just a little faster despite his best efforts to keep calm.
She entered the kitchen, her steps a little less steady than usual, mumbling a soft “Hi” as she made her way inside. Bucky glanced up, immediately sensing that she was a little tipsy. She didn’t meet his eyes, just plopped down in the chair next to him with a tired sigh. “God, my feet are killing me,” she muttered, kicking off her heels and wincing.
For a while, the silence stretched between them, broken only by the distant hum of the fridge. She sighed absentmindedly, then reached for his glass of scotch, taking a sip without asking. He was taken aback by the casual intimacy of the gesture, but he said nothing, just watched her as she leaned back in her chair.
Before he could stop himself, the words slipped out. “Want me to rub your feet?” He froze. He couldn’t believe he’d said it, half-expecting her to snap at him or give him one of her sharp retorts.
But instead, she surprised him. She looked over at him, her eyes tired but soft, and then shrugged. “Yeah...” she said, her voice a little more relaxed than he expected.
Bucky blinked, caught off guard by her response. His heart thudded against his ribcage as he moved toward her, kneeling down in front of her chair. His fingers hovered hesitantly over her ankle before gently wrapping around it, lifting her foot onto his knee.
As he began to knead his thumbs into her sore muscles, the tension that had been brewing in him all night seemed to ease, just a little. Her head lolled back against the chair, a soft sigh escaping her lips.
He couldn’t believe he was doing this, touching her again in this way, after everything. He shouldn’t, but she didn’t seem to mind. If anything, she seemed to relax more as the seconds passed, letting her guard down in a way that felt dangerously familiar.
“So... how was the date?” Bucky’s voice was quiet, almost too casual as he broke the silence.
Her eyes fluttered open at the question, and for a moment, he thought she might brush him off or remind him that it wasn’t his business. But instead, she gave a small shrug, her tone indifferent. “It was fine.”
Bucky frowned slightly, pressing his thumbs a little harder into the arch of her foot. He wasn’t sure if it was frustration or something else pushing his hands. “Fine?” he echoed, trying to keep his voice even.
“Yeah,” she murmured, closing her eyes. Her voice was soft, almost distracted. “Just... fine.”
He wasn’t satisfied with that. He couldn’t help himself, he pressed, his tone still light but with a thread of tension beneath it. “Only... fine?”
She sighed, her eyes still closed as if trying to keep the conversation from getting deeper. “What do you want me to say, Bucky?” Her voice wasn’t sharp, but there was a subtle edge in her words. “That it was amazing? That he swept me off my feet? Some dirty little details?”
Bucky’s fingers stilled for a moment, resting against her foot as he met her gaze. He didn’t respond right away, unsure if he even wanted to hear the truth, whatever it might be. “I don’t know,” he admitted quietly, his voice a little more vulnerable than he intended.
“It was just fine, nothing more, nothing less”
A silence settled between them, but he wasn’t ready to let it drop. “Are you going to see each other again outside work?” he ventured, his hands slowly moving up her shin, his touch hesitant but growing bolder. The fact that she didn’t push him away emboldened him further. “Did you enjoy yourself?”
Bucky’s hands continued their slow ascent, fingers brushing over her calf and then her knee, his touch firm but careful. When she didn’t pull away, he felt his pulse quicken. The silence stretched between them, thick with the weight of things unsaid.
“In a way,” she finally answered, her voice elusive, a touch distant. She shifted slightly in her chair, subtly parting her thighs as his hands wandered higher. The movement was small, but enough for him to catch it. His breath hitched, and his gaze flicked down to her legs before rising back up to her face, darkening with lust.
"Care to... elaborate?" he pressed again, his voice lower now, rougher. His fingers slid up to her inner thigh, lingering there with a possessive grip as if testing her reaction. Her legs instinctively spread wider beneath his touch, and that simple motion sent a rush of heat through him.
She shifted slightly, as if searching for the right words. "He’s... nice," she finally said, her voice a bit breathless under his touch. "He’s thoughtful, considerate, makes me laugh…” Her lips twitched in a small smile, but it quickly faded as she looked down at his hand resting on her thigh. “He’s... good.”
Bucky’s thumb paused, pressing a little harder, as he leaned in closer, his voice barely above a murmur. “…And?”
She sighed, her eyes opening again to meet his intense gaze. “And… he’s not you.”
His grip on her thigh tightened involuntarily, his breath catching in his throat. He’d pushed her away, done everything he could to sever the ties between them, convinced himself it was for her protection. But now, hearing her admit that, it sent his head spinning.
“He’s not you.”
The room seemed smaller, the air heavier, as the tension between them crackled like electricity. His hand inched higher, dangerously close to where he could feel the heat radiating off her body. Every instinct in him screamed to close the distance, to take what he wanted, to forget everything that had led them to this point. But he forced himself to stop, his gaze locking onto hers, searching her face for any sign that she would tell him to stop.
She didn’t. Instead, she held his gaze, her breathing shallow as if waiting to see what he would do next.
Bucky’s grip tightened again. Fuck it. He leaned forward, pressing his face against her other inner thigh, his stubble grazing her skin as he inhaled her scent deeply, a growl rumbling in his chest. She tensed, feeling him nip gently at her sensitive flesh, and then a slow, deliberate lick followed, sending a shiver through her.
"Did he behave, or..." he paused, his tongue teasing the same spot before he looked up at her, his lips brushing her thigh as he continued, "...things got handsy?"
A gasp escaped her when she felt his mouth so dangerously close to where she wanted it most. Her head tilted back just slightly, her body betraying her as desire pooled in her belly. His eyes flicked up, meeting hers, their blue depths darkened with lust, and something more. His lips remained pressed against her skin, refusing to budge until he had his answer.
"You let him touch you?" His voice was a husky whisper, laced with jealousy.
She exhaled slowly, her breath shaky as the memory flickered through her mind. "Yes," she admitted, her voice low, reluctant. "But just briefly, when we ki—"
Before she could finish, Bucky’s hand shifted, moving up to cup her mound, his fingers pressing firmly against the damp fabric of her underwear. Her words died in her throat, a sharp intake of breath replacing them as his touch ignited a fire that spread through her veins. His hand was deliberate, unapologetic in the way it claimed her, the heel of his palm pressing against her pussy as if he had every right to be there.
"And then?" His question hung in the air, but she couldn’t find the words immediately.
Her lips parted as she finally spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. "I wanted to feel something... but I didn’t. I just didn’t."
Her confession landed between them like a spark to dry wood, setting the tension ablaze. Bucky’s hand remained where it was, but his thumb stroked over the wet fabric, teasing her, testing her resolve as his gaze bore into hers. She had said what he needed to hear, what he craved to know, and now, there was no turning back.
Bucky’s thumb slid the fabric of her underwear aside, his fingers unhesitating as they slipped between her folds, finding her slick with need. He brushed upward, just barely grazing her clit, watching with dark, heavy-lidded eyes as she gasped at the contact. Her body arched involuntarily, but he didn’t relent, keeping his movements slow and deliberate, teasing her just enough to drive her crazy but not enough to give her what she craved.
“And…” his voice was low, rasping against the tension between them, “how long did it take you to realize you’d had enough? That it wasn’t going to work?”
His thumb circled lazily, making her hips shift forward, chasing the friction he barely offered. The question hung in the air, laced with his possessiveness, through every word. He didn’t wait for an answer, his fingers delving deeper inside her, coating themselves in her arousal before they moved back up, brushing over her clit again, this time with more pressure.
"One kiss?" His lips curled in a half-smirk as he watched her face contort with pleasure. He dipped his fingers inside her again, slow, dragging them out just as leisurely. "Two?"
She trembled, unable to form a coherent response, the sensation of his touch overwhelming her senses after so long. Her breath hitched as his fingers increased their pace, every stroke purposeful, designed to unravel her. Bucky leaned upward, his lips brushing the shell of her ear as he murmured, “How long, doll?” The way he said it, like a dare, made her heart race even faster.
Her head fell back, her body betraying any attempt at control as she whispered breathlessly, “One…”
A satisfied growl rumbled from him, his fingers rewarding her honesty with a firmer stroke, sending her spiraling closer to the edge.
It wasn’t fair. He had cast her aside, almost without looking back, tearing her world apart with his cold departure. And now here she was, grinding her pussy against his fingers like some desperate, needy whore, begging for more. A part of her wanted to slap him, to shove him away and scream at him for every sleepless night she spent wondering why she wasn’t enough, why he had thrown their life away so easily. She wanted to tell him how much she hated him for walking out on them.
But then, there was that traitorous side of her. The part that had never stopped hoping. The part that had always waited, held out some foolish, silent hope that he’d come back. That she’d see that flicker of warmth in his eyes again, the one that told her she was his entire world. And it wasn’t just her heart that longed for him, her body had missed him, too. She hated herself for it. For still thinking about him late at night when she touched herself, fingers slipping between her thighs as his name slipped from her lips in the darkness.
And that same traitorous side of her had ruined her date with Chris. She’d tried to be present, to laugh, to be charmed by his warm smile and thoughtful gestures. But all night, all she could think about was Bucky.
The way he’d looked at him, cold and assessing, as if he didn’t belong there, his presence filling the hallway like he still had some claim to it, to her. What was he trying to prove, anyway? That he was still the man of the house?
She hated how, even while Chris was talking, her mind drifted back to the feeling of Bucky’s fingers tracing his stupid shirt, her memory filling in the rough, familiar feel of his hands on her skin. And she knew, even if she couldn’t admit it aloud, that some part of her had wanted him to see her dressed up, to feel in some small way the longing and ache she’d carried in his absence.
And maybe that’s why she’d felt nothing when Chris had leaned in for a kiss, why his gentle smile and soft touches had felt hollow. Even his laugh, light and kind, hadn’t stirred her because it wasn't Bucky’s rough, rumbling chuckle or his stupidly confident grin. Bucky, in all his infuriating ways, still occupied every corner of her mind.
Her breath came in shallow gasps, her chest rising and falling rapidly as his fingers worked her closer to the edge. She wanted to be angry, to let that rage consume her, but every time she opened her mouth to say something hurtful, to lash out at him, her body betrayed her. Every roll of her hips against his hand, every needy whimper that slipped from her throat, reminded her of just how much she had missed this.
It wasn’t fair. But she couldn’t stop.
With a light pinch on her swollen clit, the tension snapped, and she came hard on his fingers. Her mouth fell open, a moan escaping as her body convulsed, riding the wave of pleasure that coursed through her. The world blurred around her as her climax took over, her hips grinding against his hand, chasing every last second of the release.
Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes, a mix of the overwhelming pleasure and the emotional storm swirling inside her. A few finally escaped, rolling silently down her cheeks, but before she could turn away, Bucky was there, his lips brushing them away with surprising tenderness. His breath ghosted over her skin as he whispered soft, comforting words she could barely make out, something about how beautiful she was, how good she had been for him, as if they hadn’t been tangled up in all this pain and heartache.
His touch was almost reverent as he slowly withdrew his fingers, slick and glistening from her release. Their gazes met, and he didn’t break eye contact as he brought those same fingers to his mouth, licking them clean with deliberate, agonizing slowness. He stood up in one fluid motion, effortlessly lifting her from the chair by the waist as if she weighed nothing, and in a swift, controlled movement, he placed her on top of the table, positioning himself between her legs.
Before she could even process it, his arms were around her, pulling her into a bear hug that was both tight and needy. His face buried itself in the crook of her neck, his breath warm against her skin as he inhaled deeply, taking her in.
He held her as if letting go was not an option, his grip firm yet strangely vulnerable. The way he clung to her felt like both a claim and an apology, urgent -almost broken- like he was holding onto her not just physically, but emotionally, too.
“Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll leave,” he murmured against her skin, his voice rough and low, the words vibrating against her neck. He didn’t dare look at her, not yet, because if he did, if he saw doubt or rejection in her eyes, it would break him.
Silence stretched between them, thick and heavy. Each second felt like an eternity. His breath was uneven, ragged, as he waited for her to say something, anything. Another moment passed, tension coiling tighter in his chest until he couldn’t stand it anymore. He lifted his head, his gaze searching hers, bracing himself for the worst. But instead of the words that would send him away, he saw her eyes flicker downward to his lips. It was brief, a split-second decision, but it was enough.
So he leaned in, cautiously at first, like he was testing the waters after years of distance. His lips brushed against hers softly, almost hesitant, as if afraid this fragile moment would break apart. But the second she responded, it was like a dam broke. His hands cradled her face, deepening the kiss with desperation. It was messy, all-consuming, there was no gentleness, no tenderness. This was not the careful, delicate dance of two people testing the waters. This was hunger, a ravenous need to reclaim what had been lost. His lips moved down to her jaw, her neck, leaving a trail of open-mouthed kisses, and she moaned softly, her fingers tightening in his hair as he sucked on the sensitive skin below her ear.
His hands gripped her waist, strong and possessive, pulling her closer until her body was flush against his. The need to feel her, to claim her, was overwhelming. It was like two years of silence, longing, and frustration had ignited in an instant, everything that had been pushed down now surging forward, unstoppable.
“I’ll ask you again, babydoll. Are you sure you want this?” Bucky’s voice was thick with restraint, the tension in his muscles barely contained as he hovered over her, his breath hot against her neck. He was giving her one last chance to stop this, to pull away, even though every fiber of his being was screaming for her. But instead of words, her answer was a quiet, deliberate motion. Her hand slid between them, deftly unbuttoning his jeans, her fingers brushing against the outline of his erection.
A low growl escaped him, and his hand shot down to catch her wrist, halting her movements. His gaze met hers, dark and intense, his chest heaving with barely restrained desire. “I need you to say it,” he murmured, voice rough, on the edge of control.
“Yes,” she whispered.
That was all he needed.
Without hesitation, he pulled his shirt over his head in one swift motion, not bothering with the buttons, his muscles flexing as the fabric slid off. The moment his skin was free, he didn’t give himself time to think. His eyes locked on hers as he grabbed the neckline of her dress. With a sharp tug, the fabric tore easily under his grip, the sound of it ripping filling the air. The dress fell to her waist, exposing her bare breasts to his gaze.
“Hey! It was brand new, you know?” she protested.
“I noticed,” he replied, his fingers grazing the tattered edge of her dress. “But you didn’t buy it to wear it for me, did you?” His voice dropped, thick with jealousy as he alluded to her date with Chris. He dipped his head, his lips hovering just above her exposed skin, his breath warm against her chest. “I don’t want it on you”. He latched his lips onto her nipple, his tongue swirling with a hungry need, while his vibranium fingers pinched and teased her other breast. His breath was hot against her chest as he whispered between kisses, “You have no idea how much I’ve missed this... missed you.” His words came out rough, full of longing that he couldn’t hold back any longer. “Every night... thinking about touching you again. Tasting you. Making you come over my cock.”
Her body responded, arching into him. She bit her lip, trying to stifle a moan, afraid that maybe Ben could hear her, but it slipped out anyway.
His hands moved to her thighs, gripping them firmly as he let out a low growl. “I thought about this, over and over... how you’d feel under me, how you’d sound when I made you scream my name again.” His voice was thick, hoarse, as he tugged at her dress, tearing the fabric completely until it was nothing but rags on the floor. He didn’t stop there, his thumbs slipping under the waistband of her flimsy panties. With a swift tug, the seams gave way, tearing effortlessly in his hands. He brought the soaked cloth to his nose, inhaling deeply, groaning as if the scent alone was enough to drive him insane. “God, I’ve missed this,” he muttered, his eyes never leaving hers. He flicked his tongue against the ruined cloth, savoring the taste with a low, hungry growl.
Without warning, he tossed the panties aside. His hands moved quickly, unbuttoning what remained of his jeans and kicking off his shoes before sliding the denim and underwear down in one fluid motion. They hit the floor with a soft thud as he stepped toward her. “Tell me how much you missed me,” he demanded softly.
She stared at him, drinking him in. He looked leaner, his body sculpted in sharp lines of muscle. He’d lost weight, surely by going mission after mission mixed with his poor eating habits. He was never good at taking care of himself. She almost missed the small paunch he used to have these last years, the one he hated, but she’d loved to bite. There was something comforting about that softness, but now he was the embodiment of raw strength.
Her gaze drifted lower, lingering on the sight of his cock, standing at full attention. She swallowed. Apparently, her memories failed to measure up to reality. He was big, sure, she’d always known that, but this big? Her core tightened with need, clenching in raw anticipation.
"I missed you,” she breathed, her voice barely a whisper, laced with longing as her eyes lifted to meet his. “So much… you have no idea. God, you’ve ruined me.”
Her words shattered whatever restraint he had left. He’d imagined, countless times, that if this moment ever came, he’d take his time, savor her, and make it last. But now, faced with her beneath him, so close and so ready, patience was a luxury he no longer possessed.
Without a second thought, he gripped her thighs and spread her wide on the table, lining himself up as he dragged the head of his cock along her entrance, coating himself in her slick heat. In a swift, desperate thrust, he drove into her, hard and deep, filling her completely as a ragged groan escaped his lips.
She cried out, her body responding immediately, arching into him as he slammed into her again. His hands gripped her hips with bruising force, and his own moved in a relentless rhythm, every thrust driving him deeper. He couldn’t stop. Her moans spurred him on, her words circling in his head like a drug.
“Ruined you, huh?” His breath was ragged as he pulled almost all the way out, teasing her with the loss, before slamming back in. “Let me remind you how much.” With a raw hunger that had been bottled up far too long, Bucky's thrusts became brutal, each one driving her back along the table, her nails scraping against the wood as he took her over and over. The grip on her hips was iron-hard, pinning her down so she could do nothing but take everything he gave her. He leaned in close, his breath hot against her ear. “Think anyone else could ever do this?” he murmured, his voice dark and rough, each word punctuated by a powerful thrust. His lips ghosted along her jaw, and he pushed her to answer, knowing the effect he was having on her. “Tell me,” he demanded softly “Could anyone else make you feel like this?” He wanted her to say it, to make her admit that no one else would ever satisfy her the way he could.
She whimpered, clutching at his shoulders as he pounded into her, her nails digging into his skin as he pushed her higher and higher. “No… no one else.” Her words were broken, barely audible over her moans, but it was all he needed to hear.
“That’s right” he murmured against her lips, his voice low and rough, “No one else gets to touch you like this,” he breathed, each word laced with raw possession as he thrust deeper. “Only me,” he rasped. “Only I get to make you feel this way.”
He growled, one hand leaving her hip to slide between them, his fingers pressing down on her clit in quick, merciless circles. “This is mine,” he hissed, metal fingers working just enough to bring her close before pulling away, only to return just as she thought she couldn’t take any more.
She cried out, her body writhing beneath him as he drove her to the edge. His pace never faltered, his hips grinding against hers with a relentless rhythm, and his grip on her only tightened as she arched off the table, his name spilling from her lips like a prayer.
"Say it," he demanded, his voice thick with lust and something darker, something possessive. His hands slid down the back of her thighs, pushing her legs up against her torso as he plunged deeper, she could barely breathe every time he bottomed out. The way he hit her, the pressure at her cervix, sent shockwaves of pleasure-pain coursing through her, each one making her mewl helplessly. Her thighs shook against his chest, her hands desperately clutching at his forearms, fingers digging into his skin.
He leaned in closer again, his face inches from hers, his lips brushing her ears as he growled, “Tell me you’re mine.”
"I’m yours… fuck, Bucky!" she complied, her voice breaking between her panting breaths.
"Again," he ordered, his hips slamming into hers, the table creaking under the force of his movements. He could feel her walls clenching around him, so tight, so wet, he almost lost control then and there.
“I’m yours,” she whimpered again, her voice shaky, breathless.
“Chris will be so disappointed to hear that” he growled. “Let’s make sure you stay ruined, just in case.” He was relentless now, fucking her hard, deep, his body pressing hers further into the table as he pushed her thighs harder against her body giving him even better access, hitting that sensitive spot that left her gasping, his grip and the relentless pace leaving no room for anything but the sensation of him filling her completely, over and over.
She whimpered in response, too overwhelmed to speak, her entire body tensing as the pleasure became almost unbearable. His thumb moved between them again pressing against her clit, rubbing circles that sent sparks of heat shooting through her. She gasped, her eyes squeezing shut as her orgasm built rapidly, her body teetering on the edge.
“Milk my cock.” he ordered, his voice harsh, primal. His words pushed her over the edge and then she was gone, her body shivering violently as she clenched around him, her thighs tightening around him as her hands fisted in his hair, pulling him closer. The sound of his name fell from her lips, half-whisper, half-cry as the climax gripped her, intense and all-consuming, leaving her a trembling, breathless mess.
“I’m gonna fill you up,” he growled through gritted teeth, his hips snapping into hers with bruising force. “And then some more,” he rasped, his voice thick with raw need. “You won’t even be able to keep it all in, babydoll.”
With a final thrust, Bucky’s head fell back, a deep groan rumbling from his chest as he reached his climax. His body trembled, muscles tensing as he spilled himself inside her, a heated wave of release filling her completely. He held her there, his cock kept pulsing until his release overflowed, warm and thick, beginning to trickle down, pooling beneath them.
Still buried inside her, Bucky loosened his grip on her thighs, hands sliding down to cradle her waist as he leaned forward, his forehead resting gently against her shoulder. He nuzzled into the curve of her neck, breathing in her scent, grounding himself as the heat of their union slowly ebbed, replaced by a quiet intimacy that neither of them seemed prepared for.
After a moment, he gently eased himself away, untangling their bodies but letting his hands linger at her hips, as though afraid to lose the connection. He took a step back, his gaze dropping for a moment before lifting to meet hers, hoping she’d break the silence but she didn’t look at him, her teeth worrying her bottom lip.
Bucky’s chest tightened, a familiar pang surfacing as he watched her withdraw inward, her mind elsewhere despite the intimacy they’d just shared. Finally, she spoke, her voice low, tentative. “So… what now, Bucky?”
He took a deep breath, searching for the right words. “I don’t… I didn’t plan for this to happen,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper as he forced himself to hold her gaze. “I know I shouldn’t have done this. Not after…” He hesitated, but the truth slipped out anyway. “Not after what I put you through.”
Her eyes narrowed, suspicion clouding her expression, old wounds resurfacing. “Then why did you put me through this, Bucky?” she asked, her voice soft but laced with pain. “You said you couldn’t do this. That you needed space, that we were holding you back.” Her words hung heavy in the air, each one a quiet accusation tinged with vulnerability. “And now, you’re here, acting like…” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “…acting like you never left.”
He hesitated, knowing this was his chance to finally tell her the truth or let her keep believing the lie he’d used to protect them. He rubbed a hand over his face, then lowered it, meeting her gaze with raw honesty. “I didn’t leave because I didn’t want you,” he murmured, his voice trembling. “I left because I was afraid that my past... everything I tried to bury might come back to hurt you. Hurt him.” His voice softened. “I thought if you believed I didn’t want this life, it would keep you safe.”
He glanced down, his hand twitching at his side before he looked up again, his voice hushed but resolute. "But… I want to come back,” he admitted, the words raw, like they’d been buried deep for too long. “To the house. To you, and Benjamin.”
A chill lingered in the air, and she wrapped her arms around herself, gaze flicking over their scattered clothes still strewn across the kitchen floor. She looked away, her shoulders tense as she rubbed her temples. "So, what’s changed, Bucky? The risks are still there, the same threats, the same fears..."
Bucky’s gaze didn’t waver, his hand reaching out as though to touch her, but he stopped short, fingers brushing the edge of the table instead. "What’s different is me. I’ve had time to face what I couldn’t before. Stepping aside didn’t keep you safer; it just kept me away. I don’t want Ben growing up with a dad who keeps him and his mom at arm’s length. Almost a stranger.” His voice softened, the vulnerability seeping through. “Being apart from you doesn’t make things better. I miss you, doll. I miss us.”
“You can’t just leave and come back like nothing happened, Bucky.” Her voice was softer this time, almost breaking. “I wanted you here… every day, every night. Not just for me, but for Benjamin.” Her voice trembled with raw vulnerability.
He took a step closer, his hand hovering near hers, unsure if she’d pull away. “I know, and I hate that I ever thought leaving was the answer.” His tone was low, his gaze steady on her.
She looked down, her throat bobbing as she swallowed, emotions tightening her expression. “If you come back, I need to know you’re here to stay,” she whispered, the words more for herself than for him. “Because I don’t think I can go through this again… and I won’t let him either.” Her voice cracked on the last word, her hands gripping the table harder as if to keep herself grounded.
Her words shattered the last remnants of his restraint. Without another thought, Bucky dropped to his knees in front of her, the hard tile digging into him as he pressed his forehead against her thigh. She sucked in a breath, her hand instinctively moving to his hair, fingers trembling as they brushed against him. He could feel her hesitation, the walls she’d built so carefully to guard herself from the ache he’d left behind.
“Say yes,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper, thick with the vulnerability he could no longer hide. “Say yes, doll. I know I don’t deserve it.” His hands gripped her hips, anchoring him as if she were the only thing keeping him steady. “But I swear,” His voice cracked, raw and pleading. “I swear, I’ll never walk away again. Not from you, not from Benjamin.”
She looked down, a mix of shock and pain written on her face as she saw him there, broken, open, begging her for something she’d once offered so freely. Her hand gently settled on his cheek, and he leaned into the warmth of her touch, feeling the softness of her fingers against the rough stubble of his jaw. The ache in her eyes nearly undid him, but he stayed there, his forehead still pressed to her thigh, his breath heavy, waiting.
Her eyes searched his, and slowly, her resolve began to waver, the smallest flicker of trust finding its way back into her gaze. "Then prove it," she whispered, barely trusting herself as her hand lingered against his cheek, the warmth of her palm seeping into him. "Show me you’re here to stay."
After her words hung in the air, a fragile silence between them, Bucky’s gaze dropped. He swallowed, his hand reaching for something inside the scattered clothes on the floor.
From his back pocket, he drew out a small, well-worn leather charm, a little star-shaped pendant, its edges smoothened from years of handling. She recognized it immediately. It was something she’d passed on to him when he left for his first mission after they married, a symbol she hoped would keep him safe. She thought it had been lost long ago, like so many pieces of them.
He held it out to her, and the look on his face was raw, vulnerable in a way she hadn’t seen since the early days. “I never stopped carrying this,” he murmured, his voice rough and thick. “Even when I tried to convince myself I was doing the right thing by staying away. I couldn’t let go of you…of us. I kept it close, hoping… hoping someday I could come back and give it back to you. I know it doesn’t make up for the time I lost, but…” His voice faltered, the sincerity there unmistakable.
She stared at the pendant, her hand shaking slightly as she reached out, fingers grazing the familiar leather. All the memories it held, the late-night goodbyes, the whispered promises, the hope she’d once tied to it, all of it rushed back, filling the space between them.
She looked down at him, seeing in his eyes the weight of the years, the regrets, but also the glimmer of the man she’d fallen in love with.
Taking a shaky breath, she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. “This… this was supposed to keep you safe, Bucky. Keep us safe.”
“And it did,” he replied softly, his hand covering hers over the charm. “It kept you here.” He paused, his voice barely a murmur. “And maybe now… it can bring me back home.”
The last of her defenses wavered, and she felt herself letting go of the anger, the hurt, all the pieces that had kept them apart. “Maybe… maybe it was always meant to guide you back here,” she said softly, her eyes meeting his with a warmth he hadn’t seen in years. “So if you’re really here to stay… then welcome home, Bucky.”
Dividers by: @strangergraphics
#bucky barnes x curvy!reader#bucky x curvy!reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky smut#bucky barnes fic#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes#fatws bucky#bucky barnes fanfic#the winter soldier x reader#winter soldier x female reader#winter soldier fanfiction#Ex-husband!Bucky
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Bed Chem | Oscar Piastri x Singer! Reader
summary: when rumors build up calming that the couple had broken up, they decided to break the internet with a new music video
faceclaim: Sabrina Carpenter
pairings: oscar piastri x gf!singer!reader
a/n: Excuse any errors english isn’t my main language
oscxy/n via instagram !
liked by user167, user189 and 1,560 other.
oscxy/n been missing them more than usual!
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user14 they usually give us nothing but i honestly prefer the “soft” launching then having nothing
-> user189 soft launching?! they’ve been doing that for like five years now. Do they know we know they are dating each other or do we still need to act ?
user17 i know they don’t owe us anything but what if they broke up? Oscar hasn’t been liking y/n’s post since january
user34 i just want what they have!!!
user67 okay but when are we getting popstar x f1 book?
user902 what y/n should do is realease “gross”!!! A instagram post is not enough
user98 let them breathe please!!!!
f1.gossip via instagram !
liked by landonorris, user15 and 12,000 others.
f1.gossip a close source to the australian F1 driver, Oscar Piastri confirms that he and popstar, Y/n L/n are no longer together after five years of dating. Source claims that the “please please please” singer was found getting extra cozy with her music video love interest for the “Feather” music video.
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user167 this is a lie, they told me personally that they are still together!
user51 can you guys please keep their private life private
user091 gossip pages try not to invade peoples privacy, level 100
user17 why is lando lurking in the likes?
user78 please don’t tell me lando is the “close source”
user51 they have to be together!!! no one is separating my parents
user578 please!!! i know they rarely post each other but let’s make it know that they are still together
user479 guys guys guys!!! this means we are getting a new album
y/n via instagram!
liked by logansargent, lilymhe and 2,478,892 others.
y/n well, i guess it’s time to write new music again
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user16 omg it is real.
user78 y/n unfollowed oscar!!
user89 guys! guys! guys! i need someone to talk about this!!
user57 i’m sorry but this is insane
logansargent super proud of the new music!
-> user89 now we know who got logan in the divorce
user71 are we finally getting an angsty heartbreak album?!
y/n via instagram stories
oscarandy/n updates via instagram!
liked by user17, user67 and 1,493 others
oscarandy/nupdates Oscar in Y/n's album release party?! OMG
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user72 guys? are we all seeing the same thing? the is not Oscar in the first pic
user57 don't be dell they are literally in two different places
user28 guys, let stop this. They clearly broke up. There is no point of digging more into this
user32 well, guess it's time to say goodbye to our Lover
user98 pretty sure we are finally getting a sad album
y/nhq via instagram!
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 2,891,298 others
y/nhq the music video for "Bed Chem" is out right now!! feat. Oscar Piastri
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user18 I thought we were getting a heartbreak album but this is going to be the ovulation album of the century
user71 bed chem is amazing!!!
user910 guys guys guys who can I tell this too
user280 okay but the two of them making out on top of the mclaren was crazyyyy
user18 I didn't know they had it in them
user52 and we thought they broke up, those two were just rehearsing for this damn video
y/n updates via instagram!
liked by y/n, oscarpiastri and 1,567 others.
y/nupdates Y/n got asked how was filming "Bed Chem" with Oscar.
"Honestly, we were so shy about it at first. Like we usually are really shy when it comes to out relationship and being public about it. Now, by doing this everyone was going to see a part we see behind close doors"
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user19 guys this is crazyyyyy
user28 they are so cute I love them!!
user51 shy? Oscar's hand placement was everything but shy
user28 I know they were obsessed with eachother
user539 she was such a blushing mess in this interview
user78 I love seeing this side of our girl
y/n via insta stories! oscarpiatri via insta!
oscarpiastri via instagram!
liked by landonorris, logansargent and 832,902 others.
oscarpiastri so happy to finally be my lovers, love interest. Guess I'll switch professions! (by the way, yes I'm the cute boy with the white jacket and the cute accent!)
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user17 Oscah, you little slut
user78 omg omg we finally get a post of them together
mclaren please don't
user24 they are so cute
user28 Oscar, can you fight?
y/n I love you so so much! My forever love interest
user27 Oscar, we heard bed chem...didn't imagine you as the kinky type
landonorris honestly need to get that song out of my head because I can't imagine you like that
#imagines#imagine#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 x you#oscar pastri smau#oscar pastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri#oscar piastri x reader#formula 1#f1 2024#sabrina carpenter
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ROUGH SEX WITH YOUR CO-STAR! ⸻ jensen ackles
content / jensen ackles x fem!reader, actor!jensen, actress!reader, age gap, 18+, mdni, dom!jensen, sub!reader, oral (male receiving), forced blow job, hair pulling, choking, p in v (unprotected), praise kink, just jensen being freaky asf, 3.8k words
summary / when the mixture of alcohol and forbidden attraction hits you, you are no longer sure how long you can deny the growing desire between you and Jensen
The sound of laughter and music filled the bar as you and cast of The Boys gathered around the table, enjoying a rare evening off after a whirlwind of interviews, conventions, and press events promoting the new season.
You sat near the edge of the group, a glass of wine in your hand as you watched the scene unfold. You’d been on the road with them for two weeks now, traveling from state to state to promote the show, and despite the exhausting schedule, nights like this made it all worth it.
Especially with your costar Jensen sitting just across the table, his smile lighting up the room, making everyone around him feel at ease. And despite your usual calm aura, he could tell you were taking it all in, probably still adjusting to the chaotic rhythm of show business.
You had joined the cast as the newest love interest for Soldier Boy, Jensen's character, and while you’d been nervous about working with such an established actor— he quickly made you feel comfortable. He was kind, funny, and despite being almost fifteen years older than you, he never treated you like the "new girl."
When you’d first started working together, Jensen was like a mentor to you but soon enough,m he found himself noticing more than just your talent. While you also found yourself noticing things about him—like the way he smiled at you when you two ran lines together or how his hand would linger just a little longer on your arm when you wrapped a scene.
And then, of course, there was the fact that you found him undeniably attractive. Everyone knew Jensen was good-looking, but up close? It was something else entirely. You’d kept it professional, though. He'd just come off a divorce, and the last thing you wanted was to complicate things for him or yourself.
Still, there was no denying the chemistry between you two, both on-screen and off. And Jensen wasn't oblivious to the tension that had developed between you over the last few weeks either..
"Hey, y/n," Jensen called from across the table, snapping you out of your thoughts. He was leaning forward, his voice cutting through the laughters around you. "You've been quiet tonight. Everything okay?"
You smiled, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. "Yeah, just still getting used to it."
Jensen grinned, his eyes glistening in the dim light. "You sure? We've got drinks, great company. Seems like a perfect night to me."
You chuckled, sipping your wine to hide the fact that your heart had started beating just a little faster.
He'd been like this all night—talkative, laughing easily, and more physical than usual. His hand had brushed your arm more than once when you talked, and every time, your skin began to burn—in a good way.
As the night wore on, the group started to thin out. Some of the cast heading back to the hotel, but you, Jensen, and a few others stuck around, ordering another round of drinks. The bar was cozier now, quieter, and the low lighting gave it an intimate atmosphere.
So Jensen found himself talking to you more closely, the casual distance between you shrinking without you even realizing it.
"So, how are you feeling about everything?" He asked, his voice low as he swirled the amber liquid in his glass. "The show, all this traveling. It's a lot, huh?"
"Yeah," you admitted, meeting his gaze. "It's been amazing, though. A little surreal, honestly. Sometimes I still can't believe I'm here, working with you guys."
"Well, you're killing it," Jensen said, his eyes locking onto yours. "I mean it, y/n. You've been great this season."
Your cheeks flushed, and you looked down, trying to compose yourself. "Thanks. That means a lot, coming from you."
"Don't downplay it. You're talented as hell. And...you're fun to work with. Really fun,"
he added, letting his words hang in the air. He hadn't meant for them to sound as loaded as they did, but now that he'd said it, he found himself holding your gaze a little longer, wondering if you’d caught the shift in his tone.
Your heart raced as you glanced up at him, trying to read his expression. Was he just being friendly? Or was there something more behind his words?
"I—" you started, but the words caught in your throat. You weren’t sure what you were supposed to say, or even if you should say anything at all. But it was hard to ignore the way he was looking at you, the warmth in his eyes, the subtle way his knee brushed against yours under the table.
"You know," he said, his tone lighter now, though his eyes never left yours, "I think we've spent more time together on this road trip than we did shooting the season."
You laughed softly, grateful for the slight change in topic. "Yeah, but the road trip's been fun. It's nice getting to see different places, meet fans, and, you know, bond with the cast."
Jensen's grin widened. "Bond, huh? Is that what we're calling it?"
You laughed, clearly trying to brush off the tension. "What else would you call it?"
"Something else entirely," he said, his voice low, a hint of challenge that sent a shiver through you.
Before you could respond though, Karl called over from the bar, breaking the moment. Jensen leaned back, laughing at something the others were saying, but his hand lingered on your lower arm, his thumb tracing a small, almost absent-minded circle against your skin. It was such a subtle gesture, but it sent a thrill through you.
You couldn't shake the feeling that there was more going on here than just casual flirting. There was tension between the two of you, a pull you couldn't ignore, and you were certain he felt it too.
But as much as you wanted to explore whatever this was, you knew you had to be careful. Still, you couldn't deny the way your heart fluttered every time he looked at you.
For now, you’d play it cool. But something told you that whatever was happening between you wasn't going away anytime soon.
Eventually, even the most fun nights had to end. The bar's lights dimmed and everyone decided it was time to call it a night. You all made your way back to the hotel, the cool night air helping to clear your mind, which had been buzzing with thoughts of Jensen all night.
When you finally reached your room, you kicked off your shoes and put on your silk pyjamas before flopping onto the bed with a long sigh. The events of the night played in your head—Jensen's teasing remarks, the way he'd stayed close to you, how his touch lingered just a bit too long. There was definitely something there, you could feel it.
But as your thoughts swirled, you suddenly realized something. Your phone. Where was your phone? You shot up, mentally retracing your steps. Then it hit you—you’d given it to Jensen earlier in the night to hold onto because you hadn't brought a purse with you.
"Dammit," you muttered, cursing yourself for forgetting. Now you’d have to go to his room and get it back. You groaned inwardly, knowing it would feel awkward after the way you’d been acting all night. But there was no way you could go to bed without your phone.
Reluctantly, you got up, slipped your shoes back on, and headed out of your room. You walked down the hallway, heart thumping a little faster than it should have. You told yourself it was just because you didn't want to bother him this late, but you knew the truth.
It was Jensen.
And the way he made you feel, had you on edge.
When you reached his door, you took a deep breath and knocked. No response. You frowned and knocked again, a little louder this time. Still nothing. You were just about to turn and head back to your room when the door swung open.
And there stood Jensen, a towel wrapped loosely around his hips, his hair wet and dripping from the shower. He looked at you with those piercing eyes, a playful smirk on his lips, completely unfazed by the fact that he was half-naked in front of you.
Your breath caught in your throat. God, he looked unbelievably sexy. His broad chest was still glistening with water, and your eyes instinctively trailed down over his abs to the towel hanging low on his hips.
You were completely overwhelmed, mind scrambling to find words, but all you could do was stand there, staring like a deer caught in the headlights.
"Uh... I—" you stammered, trying to get rid of any filthy thoughts that were coming to you. "I need my phone... I think you have it? I gave it to you earlier at the bar."
Jensen raised an eyebrow, amused by the way your cheeks flushed as he smirked. "Oh, yeah. I forgot about that," he said, his voice playful. "Come on in. I think I put it on the nightstand."
You hesitated for a split second, heart hammering in your chest, but you forced yourself to move, stepping inside. The room was dimly lit, cozy, and the scent of his sweet body wash hung in the air. You tried not to focus on how close he was standing to you as you made your way to the nightstand where your phone sat.
As you reached for it, you could feel his eyes on you, the tension between you almost palpable. You picked up the phone, your hand trembling slightly, and turned to face him.
He was leaning casually against the wall now, arms crossed, still wearing nothing but that damn towel. His demeanor was teasing, but there was something else in his gaze too—something that made your pulse race even faster.
"You know," Jensen said, his voice low and smooth, "you could've just called for it. Oh wait," he added with a smirk, "you didn't have your phone."
You rolled your eyes, laughing softly. "Yeah, a little hard to call without it," you replied, attempting to sound nonchalant but clearly nervous.
Jensen chuckled softly, pushing off the wall and walking toward you, stopping just a few feet away. He looked down at you with that same playful glint in his eyes, the air between you thick with something unspoken.
"You sure that's all you came for?" he asked, his voice dropping lower. He saw the hesitation in your eyes, the flicker of doubt, but also curiosity, maybe even a hint of longing.
Your breath hitched. You could feel the tension between you two, the way his gaze held yours, and for a brief second, you wondered what would happen if you just... leaned in.
But then reality came crashing back. Jensen had just gone through a divorce. He was vulnerable, and you didn't want to complicate things, not like this. Not now.
You forced yourself to smile, though your heart was still racing. "Yeah," you said, holding up your phone as if to prove your point. "Just needed this."
Jensen's eyes lingered on you for a moment longer before he stepped back a little, his smirk softening. "Well, you've got it now."
"Thanks," you said quickly, eyes dropping down to the floor as you couldn't bare to look into his piercing green eyes, yet the pull too was strong, so that you raised your head again just seconds later.
His eyes flickered with something unreadable as he watched you standing there, still holding onto your phone like a lifeline. The playful smirk never leaving his face, his voice low and laced with a teasing challenge.
"Yet you're still here."
The words hung in the air between you, thick with tension. You froze, the grip on your phone tightening.
Were you imagining things? Misreading him?
The way he had been so flirtatious all night, the casual touches, the lingering glances-it couldn't be nothing, could it?
Your mind was spinning, trying to make sense of the situation. You weren’t sure if you were overthinking or if you were too tipsy to trust your own judgment. But the way he looked at you now, like he was daring you to stay, made your pulse race.
He must have noticed the hesitation in your eyes because his expression shifted. He moved toward you, closing the distance, his hand finding your waist with an almost deliberate slowness. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver through you, and before you could process what was happening, he pulled you just a bit closer.
It was a bold move, one that made your heart skip a beat. You were taken aback, breath hitching in your chest as you looked up at him. His face was inches from yours now, and the tension was so thick it was hard to breathe.
For a moment, your mind raced with mixed emotions. You knew this could complicate everything. And yet, the pull between you was undeniable.
Jensen's thumb gently brushed your side, his touch grounding you as the intensity of the moment swirled around you.
His green eyes bore into yours, and for a split second, you were unsure of what to do. But then, in the next heartbeat, your hesitation melted away. Without thinking, you leaned in, your lips meeting his in a rush of heat and urgency.
The second your mouths touched, it was like a dam had broken. The tension that had been simmering between you all night finally erupted into something raw and electric.
Jensen responded immediately, his grip on your waist tightening as he pulled you fully against him, eager to finally feel you, his lips moving hungrily against yours.
Your mind blurred with a heady mix of desire and disbelief, your hands instinctively finding their way to his bare chest, your fingers grazing his muscles still damp from the shower. You could taste the faint bitterness of alcohol on his lips, and the fact that you were both a little tipsy only seemed to add to the intensity of the moment.
His hands roamed up your sides, one slipping into your hair as the kiss deepened, his body pressing you gently but firmly against the edge of the bed. Your heart raced, pulse pounding in your ears as you softly plunged onto the soft mattress.
You unconsciously bit onto your lower lip as you looked up at him, unholy images replaying in your mind as your gaze fell onto his happy trail, wanting nothing more than to rip that damn towel off of him.
Jensen noticed how your eyes stuck to his body just a little too long, eliciting a chuckle out of him, "Go ahead, no need to be all shy now."
For a second, a small ounce of doubt crept into your mind—this was risky, so risky. You two were co-stars, and if anyone found out, it could lead to complications neither of you were ready for. But as Jensen's hand reached down to your chin, grabbing it with his big palm, that doubt vanished, replaced by desire.
You couldn't bare the need for him any longer, immediately getting to work by dropping onto your knees, the anticipation almost killing you as Jensen teasingly began to remove the towel from his hips.
His eyes never left yours as he pulled down the white cloth, revealing his already hard cock. The sight of him, made your breath catch in your throat, gulping as you saw how big he actually was.
You came face to face with his length, looking up at him through hooded eyes, "Come on, show me what that pretty mouth can do." He groaned, immediately sending tingles to your core, desperately pressing your thighs together.
With easy hands you held him in your soft palms, running your thumb over his tip and spreading the already leaking precum over it.
Pressing your lips together you gathered all your courage and inched closer, sticking out your tongue and licking a stripe all the way from his base to the tip. You repeated this action a few more times, then fully taking him in your mouth as far as you could go.
"Holy fuck, baby." Jensen growled, his head thrown back in pleasure as he couldn't believe how good your wet and warm mouth felt around him, only having imagined it before.
You began to swirl your tongue around his cock, jerking off what you couldn't get in your mouth, as he reached to grab a fist full of your hair, yanking you back a little so he could grab at your neck with his other hand.
"You wanna be a good girl for me, right?" He mumbled in between grunts, admiring your plump lips that were so desperately trying to get back to sucking him off. You nodded hastily, this man could literally do anything to you and you’d thank him after.
"Good then, open up wide, baby."
He instantly took advantage of your parted lips and plunged himself down your throat in a swift motion, your eyes widening as you had to gag at the force.
"Shhh, relax." Jensen cooed, his voice now softer as he gave you some time to get used to your mouth being full of him.
Once you gave him a small nod he began rolling his hips slowly into your mouth, your hands grabbing at his thighs to steady yourself. It was a weird feeling to have him down your throat so deep but as he continued his movements you began to like it, wanting him to go even harder.
You jerked your face closer to his abdomen, earning a deep and breathless chuckle from him. Realizing how eager you were lapping at his dick he picked up his pace, his tip hitting the back of your throat over and over again, driving you crazy.
The built up of saliva and precum that was dripping from the corner of your lips, helped Jensen even more to slide his cock in and out of your warm mouth.
His grunts became louder and his hands were gripping the back of your head as he fucked your throat, your moans sending vibrations throughout his body, and he knew that if he continued he wouldn't last any longer.
But cuming just in your mouth tonight wouldn't satisfy him, he needed more.
Pulling you off him by your hair you shot him a confused look, scared that he might've changed his mind and didn't want any of this, that it was just the alcohol on which behalf he was acting out, but his words quickly made all your doubts vanish.
"Need to finish inside you, y/n." He said, before pulling you back onto your feet and yanking your small frame onto the silky sheets.
Towering over you he ran his hands along the soft fabric of your pyjama shorts, pulling them down harshly as you freed yourself from the little top that was just barely covering your tits anyway.
By the way his eyes widened and the way he pulled some air in sharply, you could tell that he took notice of your dripping wet cunt, already leaking onto the sheets. "Jensen.." you whined, the urge to finally feel him inside taking over you.
"Patience, baby." He smirked up at you, eyes full of lust as he placed some teasing kisses onto the insides of your soft thighs, making you squirm in desperation.
Jensen jerked his still glistening cock for a few times, his one hand stayed at your chest, playing with your tit, as he lined himself up with your entrance.
Looking up at you for approval, you nodded which gave him the sign to proceed, his tip brushing over your clit and through your slick folds to lube himself up, before pushing into your needy cunt fast.
You gasped at the sudden fullness, his cock stretching out your walls so perfectly, making Jensen grunt as he burried himself completely inside you, as if you were made for him.
"Gosh, look how perfect your pretty cunt is sucking me in. Really needed me that bad, huh?"
Your eyes scrunched together, feeling yourself get wetter from his words alone. You rapidly nodded, breathing out a soft "mhm..shit..yes" as he chuckled, leaning down to press open mouthed kisses to your neck.
He was quick to go back to his previous action, rolling his hips smoothly against yours as he picked up his pace, soon slamming into you at an ungodly speed. The almost pornografic noises that came out of your mouth made him chuckle, clearly knowing that there might be some complaints by the morning, but he didn't care.
He kept on pounding into your eager pussy, your legs wrapped around his hips by now, making him hit much deeper, if that was even humanly possible.
"Fuck.. I'm gonna.." you cursed underneath your breath, feeling the familiar knot in your lower stomach screaming for release.
"Cum all over me, sweetheart." Jensen groaned into your ear, his hot breath making your skin prickle. His hand crept down, two of his digits rubbing circles at your clit, causing you to let out a loud, almost scream-like, moan as you released all over him, creaming his cock.
"Fucking shit.." he grunted, teeth pressing into his lower lip as he gave you a few more hard thrusts, pearls of sweat forming on his forehead as he chased his own high.
Groaning out loud you felt him twitch inside of you, cuming deep in your cunt, painting your slick walls white.
As both of you calmed down you still couldn't believe that this was actually real, even as Jensen pulled out of you and plopped onto the bed beside you.
"Shit y/n, that shower was hella pointless..definitely not complaining though." He laughed, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine as he wrapped one of his big arms around your waist, pulling you close.
"Well, screams for a round two then." You replied, stroking his muscular chest.
"You mean this or the shower?" He eyed you down, a smirk plastered on his face as he pointed in between you two.
You just shrugged, yet the devilish smile plastered on your lips gave it away.
wow this was a wild ride, and i am actually kinda proud of this one !!
feedback and requests are greatly appreciated !!
tags 🏷️ @gibson-g1rl @beausling @angelicjackles @nuemanfilms @hischrrypie @seasons-of-death @starkeysprincess @drewsarms @rubyvhs @deansenvy @supernatural-wolfie @sammyluvr @nxptvn @rafecameroninterlude @deansbite
#writers on tumblr#spnfandom#supernatural#jensen ackles#oneshot#jensen fucking ackles#jensen ackles x you#jensen ackles x reader#jensen ackles smut#jensen x reader#jensen x fem!reader#smut#the boys#soldier boy
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every insane thing in arcane s2 act 1 in no particular order (spoilers)
CAITVI KISS (they're actually all i think about your honour)
that HUG (i SCREAMED oh my GODDDD)
bro s2 jinx lowk has a different flavour and i'm loving it
jinx and sevika dynamic is actually really funny LMFAO
when sevika's new arm started playing music and jinx was just enjoying herself (HELP she's so unserious)
viktor in his jesus era??? i KNEW i wasn't projecting the religious undertones
mel is going THROUGH IT
ambessa what's goin on
bro...the kid...she's gonna die isn't she
the jinx and vi fight scene took me out actually like bro why r the girls fighting
viktor and jayce divorced (not even that big of a jayvik shipper but i felt this one...the affection that held them together...yeah)
VI you will ALWAYS be my favourite idgaf what the fandom says or thinks about you i LOVE YOU ALWAYS
cait said "i won't change" but she already has GOD TELL THE SAPPHICS TO LEAVE ME ALONE
on that note i WILL be defending caitlyn for everything she does she has so much flavour oh my god
ekko and heimerdinger most unserious characters ever
on a more serious note tho i love ekko i'm soooo interested to see what he gets up to this season
lowk i think jinx is likely to be more favourable towards vi from here on out given how their fight ended and since vi's probably gonna enter her emo pitfighter era post-caitvi breakup and since we saw her betting on vi PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE JUST MAKE UP AND HUG OR SOMETHING
caitvi breakup that no one is allowed to talk about or i'll crash out
bro the way the season started too...that was HEAVY
i lowk like the faster pace this season last season felt like a lot of buildup imo
what is this shady black rose shit
tf actually is the arcane bro
jayce and vik girlbossed a bit too close to the sun and might've woken up some ancient uncontrollable power haha
GIVE ME ACT 2 NOW I'M FOAMING AT THE MOUTH
#yeah so#zoe yaps#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane s2#vi arcane#caitlyn kiramman#caitvi#jinx arcane#sevika#jayce talis#viktor arcane#jayvik#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#ekko arcane
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MOUTHWASHING CHARACTERS HEADCANONS!
under the cut!
Captain, Grant Curly.
Nationality : His mother is Half Australian/Canadian. And his father is Half British/American.
Age: 36
Height: 193 cm ( 6'4 )
Sexuality: he is questioning,but he definitely ain't straight.
Comes from a very big and happy family,is the 3rd oldest brother to 2 sisters and 1 brother. And has 2 older brothers.
His parents are very happily married.
He is the tallest out of his siblings.
His family is the type to host dinner parties every now and then and invite the entire neighborhood over for barbeques.
has a reputation of being 'the picture perfect family'.
Got his driver's license first.
Is very protective of all of his siblings,even the older ones.
Valedictorian.
Was the sports team's captain for 3 years running.
Extremely well liked at the gym,lots of newcomers look up to him.
Can play the violin, effortlessly.
Can also play the guitar very well.
His family had a Rottweiler for 17 years.
All of his siblings have moved out.
Was a very popular jock in high school,but so kind that students and teachers alike loved him.
Met Jimmy in middle school,and for some reason became joint at the hip with him. His fellow peers didn't understand why he liked jimmy so much.
Has had a fuckton of girlfriends all throughout highschool and college.
Only drinks beer,does not smoke.
Is kind of a country bumpkin.
Co-Pilot, Jimmy "Jim" Zare.
Nationality: American. ( Mom is from Louisiana,Dad is from Florida ) Born and brought up in Texas.
Age: 34
Height: 180 cm ( 5'11 )
Sexuality: Closeted gay with internalised homophobia.
Comes from a nuclear family consisting of him and his parents.
Did not have a happy home life growing up.
His parents did not have a happy marriage and were constantly fighting.
M O M M Y I S S U E S
his mother didn't like him from the get go,he was very close with his father up until his death.
His mysogynistic behaviour comes from the pent up hatred towards his mother.
Used to be a kleptomaniac.
Contrary to popular belief,he takes good care of his hygiene.
tw. ( used to self harm,but hated his scars,hence he always wears full sleeved clothes )
When he met curly,he wanted so badly to be friends with him because he thought he was so cool.
Had no friends other then curly growing up.
Picked up a smoking habit at the age of 14.
Heavy drinker.
Although he is quite lanky,his agility is shit.
Might be ooc for him,but he's an incredibly talented chef. But hates talking about it.
His grades were average at best growing up.
Was a great swimmer.
After his mother's death,his grandparents took him in.
Has a huge ass crush on curly but feels so disgusted with himself that he passes homophobic comments in front of curly to erase any suspicions.
This pent up crush slowly started building up into hatred.
The school counselor did try to look out for him,but he just never cared.
Never been in a relationship.
Nurse,Anya Marinova
Nationality: American/Russian.
Age: 29
Height: 175 cm ( 5'9 )
Sexuality: Closeted Lesbian.
Her parents divorced shortly after she was born,she never really saw her father because her mother moved to America soon after the divorce.
Her father did help out with her education.
She has a half-sister. ( Same mother different father )
Is very close to her half-sister.
Her sister was diagnosed with stage 2 cancer at the age of 7,it's where she got her dream to be a nurse from.
Loves listening to music when she goes out for walks.
Is a skilled scuba diver.
The only makeup she wears is mascara.
Isn't really all that close with her mother.
Her grades were very very impressive up until college,where she slipped due to feeling burnt out.
Jollibee > Kfc
She has visited russia once when she was 8
Used to have a pet snake.
Has lots and lots and lots of friends from high school and college that she still hangs out with.
Doesn't drink but occasionally smokes due to stress. ( She has never told a single soul this )
Prior to boarding the tulpar she had heard about curly. ( Due to his popularity )
Loves sweet things.
Wanted to be a vet originally.
Mechanic,Swansea Harold.
Nationality: American.
Age: 58
Height: 172 cm ( 5'8 )
Sexuality: Straight.
Used to slack off in college.
His father passed away without having seen his son's sobriety.
His mother was heavily disappointed in him,up until he decided to get sober.
Is the middle child of 7 siblings.
His older brothers helped him out financially throught out his struggling years.
He met his wife when he was in his mid to late thirties,his wife had already been divorced with a son.
After his marriage he had a daughter with her.
Drinks root beer a lot.
His sneaker collection is no joke,he has a closet dedicated to them.
Curly was an intern of his,and he is incredibly proud of him.
He actually had given his paella recipe to jimmy.
Snores very loud.
Dislikes sweet and heavily spicy things.
'who the fuck messed with the thermostat?' kind of a dad.
Has showed up to every single one of his kid's school events.
Is quite scared of his father in law.
Whenever Daisuke would fall asleep,he would sometimes sneakily play on his game boy kid.
Mechanic Intern,Daisuke Juanez
Nationality: Half Japanese/ Half Mexican.
Age: 20
Height: 177 cm ( 5'10 )
Sexuality: Questioning.
has 3 older sisters.
His parents relationship was quite tumultuous but they always managed to work it out.
Comes from wealth.
His three sisters are already well settled in different countries.
Was very popular back in high school and college.
Although his grades weren't the brightest,his charismatic personality is what drew people to him.
Runs very fast.
Although he was popular, he's only been in a relationship twice.
The arcade which he frequents has kids waiting for him to show up,to teach them how to win.
Loves to eat different cuisines. ( Indian and Mexican are his top ones! )
Loves eating spicy food.
Had a weeb phase.
Used to be in the theatre club in school.
His family loves animals.
Has 7 cats.
He got his left ear pierced at 16. His mom whooped the shit out of him.
Very clumsy,has random ass bruises all over his body.
#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing wrong organ#wrong organ#mouthwash#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing jimmy#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing curly#grant curly#captain curly#curly#jimmy#mouthwashing anya#anya mouthwashing#mechanic swansea#mouthwashing swansea#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke#mouthwashing daisuke#daisuke mouthwashing#mouthwashing analysis#mouthwashing headcanon#mouthwashing headcanons#headcanons
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Down Bad
Coach Negan x F!Reader
Song inspo: Down Bad by Taylor Swift 🤍
Summary: You confess your feelings to your gym coach and he shows you how he feels in return. Warnings: 18+, smut, p in v, slight choking, praise kink, age-gap (reader is 18, Negan is in his 40's)
You had stopped dressing out, stopped walking laps, and stopped giving a damn in general. You were graduating high school in a couple of weeks and that meant that you wouldn't see him again. Coach Negan had been your favorite teacher over the past four years, letting you get by doing the bare minimum while still giving you an A+ each semester.
He's been there for you through it all - Your major breakups, the start of your womanhood, even your parents divorce. When you told Negan about your dad leaving during your sophomore year, he became overly protective over you, like he was trying to fill that void in your life. It was clear to everyone that you were his favorite, and that didn't seem to bother Negan. But you wanted him in a deeper way, and it was starting to become more and more obvious to both of you.
You turned down the volume on your earbuds when Negan sat next to you on the bleachers. The two of you watched the other students walking laps around the gym silently for a few moments before he spoke.
"You know I can't keep letting you get away with doing nothing, doll. It looks like favoritism."
"Isn't it, though?" You grinned, glancing at him with your arms crossed. He copied your body language, leaning back on the bleachers.
"That's beside the point." His jean covered knee rubbed against yours as he smirked. You sighed and his gaze softened. "Seriously, kid. What's up with you lately?"
You could feel your cheeks turning pink as you looked down at your phone, changing the song. Negan took an earbud out of your ear and held it up to his own, curious as to what you were listening to.
"No wonder you're so down. This music is depressing as shit." He laughed before putting it back in your ear.
"Maybe that's part of it." I shrugged.
"Yeah? What's the other part?" He asked, resting his arm on the bleacher behind you and running his thumb over the back of your arm. Chills instantly spread over your skin and your legs discretely pressed together. At least, you thought you were discrete, but the smirk on his face and the way his eyes dropped to your thighs said otherwise.
"You know where to find me if you want to talk." He said, leaving you and heading to his office.
You sighed louder, dropping your head back after watching him disappear. The cologne trail he left behind filled your lungs and broke you at the same time. The thought of never seeing him again made you want to drop from the face of the earth.
You were in love with him. And you had been for awhile now, which would explain the crippling depression and lack of motivation. There was no way it could ever work between the two of you. He was old enough to be your father. He probably wasn't even attracted to you in that way, but you had built this fantasy world in your mind where the two of you could be together. You spent more time in that world than in reality, and music helped you get there.
The bell rang moments later, dismissing school for the day. You sat still, watching the others file out of the gym like they couldn't wait to leave. And here you were, glued to the bleachers like you wanted to stay forever.
Before you could talk yourself out of it, you gathered your things and went to Negan's office. You'd been there numerous times throughout the past four years. He kept it unlocked and stayed at least an hour after dismissal. You knocked lightly, waiting for his permission before entering.
"Well, that was quick." Negan smiled, showing his pretty teeth while motioning for you to sit in the chair in front of his desk. His arms crossed as he leaned back in his chair and studied you, completely ignoring whatever he was busy with before.
"Sorry, I know you're busy.." You began.
"Never too busy for you, sweetheart. You ready to talk about what's been on your mind?
"Maybe." You began, sounding unsure and feeling sick. This was a bad idea.
"Maybe? We talk all the damn time, kid. What's different this time?"
"I think I'm.. in love with this guy.. who probably has no clue. It's embarrassing."
"You told me about the time you lost your virginity for fuck's sake. We've had these talks before. Why is it embarrassing?"
You felt your cheeks burning, remembering how you sobbed in this same chair a year ago when your first love broke your heart.
"Because if you knew who, you'd probably never speak to me again."��You said, unable to look at him.
Negan tilted his head curiously, holding back a grin. "Doubt it, kid. Try me."
"Okay, well, he's older. A lot older." You glanced at him.
"Okay." Negan nodded. "So he doesn't go here."
"Well, he sort of does.. He's um, not a student though." You felt lightheaded like you could faint any second.
He sighed. "A teacher?"
"Is.. that.. awful?" You asked, cringing at how ridiculous you must sound.
"It will be... if it's not me." He stood, walking around his desk and leaning against it when he stopped in front of you.
"And if it is?" You asked, looking up at him.
"It fucking better be. Come here." He said in almost a whisper. You stood instantly and he moved out of the way, nodding his head towards the desk that he was just leaning on, silently telling you to sit.
He stepped between your legs, lifting them slightly as he pulled you forward to the very edge of the desk. Your clothed pussy was pressed against the bulge in his jeans and the friction made you wetter by the second. You tried to control your visible shaking.
"Since we're confessing things now, there's something you should know too." He said, thrusting forward. "I've thought about fucking your little pussy every day since you turned 18. How it would taste, how it would feel wrapped around my cock, how you would sound screaming my name. Is that awful?"
"Negan.."
"Oh and, if if wasn't obvious already.. I'm fuckin' crazy about you, too." He grinned.
You pressed your lips to his and felt his smile widen as he kissed you back. He took the lead, deepening the kiss as his hands explored you further. He lifted your shirt over your head and tossed it to the side while his gaze lingered over your chest. His fingers fumbled with the clasp of your bra before sliding it off your arms.
"So fucking perfect." He practically moaned before dipping down and wrapping his mouth around your perky nipple. He teased the other one too before coming back up to capture your lips again. His movements became quicker, and you became more confident, running your hands up his back underneath his shirt. He stood back just enough to take off his shirt and you admired his hairy, tattooed chest, seeing it for the first time. Your gaze followed the happy trail under his belly button to the hair peeking out of his low-hanging jeans.
"If this it too fast, you can tell me, baby. We don't have to rush."
"No." You said too quickly. "...I want this."
"Good." He grinned, kissing you again as he began unbuttoning your jeans. You couldn't believe this was happening. You were so lost in the moment when a knock on the door made you both freeze. Negan dropped his head, clearly annoyed. "Yeah?!"
"Coach, can I -"
The door opened and you covered yourself with your hands as well as you could, although Negan's body blocked most of yours. Negan didn't flinch. Instead, he calmly turned his head and stared at the student at the door. "Did I fucking say you could come in?"
"N-no sir." He stuttered nervously before leaving and closing the door behind him.
"Negan!" You said panicked. "He could tell someone. You could lose your job."
"So be it, doll. Nothing is getting in my way of this." He said softly, lifting you slightly to remove your jeans and panties. He slipped them off your ankles and spread your legs, admiring your glistening lips.
"Goddamn girl, you are perfect." He leaned down to lick you once and you whimpered at the quick loss of his tongue.
"Don't worry baby, we have all the time in the world for that. Right now? I need to be buried inside you. That okay?" He asked, unzipping his jeans and pulling out his completely hard cock. He was long, thick and much bigger than your previous boyfriend.
You nodded desperately. "Yes, yes, Negan, please."
He slid into you with one deep motion, doing just as he said - burying himself inside you. It was so deep it made your jaw drop slightly.
"Fuuuuuck sweetheart. You feel fucking incredible." His forehead pressed against yours and he began thrusting into you at a steady pace. Blood rushed to your cheeks at how amazing it felt.
"Lay back for me." He said, lightly pushing you to lay flat on your back on the desk. He remained inside of you and pulled you closer until your ass was just hanging off the edge. He placed your ankles on his shoulders as he plowed into you, hitting an even deeper spot than before. Tears filled your eyes at the sensation and you covered your mouth, trying not to scream.
"Uncover that pretty mouth, baby. I want everyone in this goddamn school to hear how good I'm making you feel." Your hands dropped to your sides and you let go, moaning loudly without caring.
"Fuck baby. Look at that." He said, looking down at your body. You lifted your head to look down and your eyes widened at the sight of his cock repeatedly protruding your stomach. You both watched in awe, breathing heavily as his thrusts became faster. His large hands gripped your waist, rubbing his thumbs over the bulge in your belly.
"Negan! Feels so good." You cried.
"I know baby, I know. Fuck." He groaned, pulling out of you, only to flip you over. You turned your head to the side, laying your cheek on the cold desk as he pulled your hips closer to him. He helped you wrap your legs around his waist as he pushed himself back into you, pulling on your thighs as he fucked you harder than before. Your chest pressed painfully against the desk but the sensation didn't compare to the bruising he was giving your cervix.
He allowed your legs to drop to the floor, leaving you in a position bent over his desk. Gripping your hair, he pulled you back and leaned over to meet you until his mouth attached to your neck. He bit down on the sensitive skin next to your shoulder while fucked you.
"This little pussy is mine now. Say it." He demanded, his voice in your ear sending chills through your body.
"It's yours, Negan! Only yours."
He chuckled, reaching around and instantly finding your clit. He rubbed his middle finger over it in circles while his other hand wrapped around your throat with the perfect amount of pressure. You tried to moan when you felt your orgasm approaching, but his hand around your throat stopped them from escaping and left your mouth silently gaping open.
Your eyes fluttered shut and your ears started to ring when it hit you - warm juices flooded his cock and dripped down your inner thighs as you moaned his name over and over.
"Thaaaaat's it, y/n. Good girl." He said the last part with a growl, letting go of your throat and turning you quickly. "Knees, now."
You eagerly obeyed him, dropping down and sticking out your tongue to catch his load. He looked down at you while stroking his cock and you closed your eyes, feeling it shoot across your face in warm, pulsating waves. He grunted louder with each one, until every drop was out of him and on your face.
"And here I thought you couldn't get any prettier, baby." He said, cupping your face and admiring you. You both cleaned up, using the tissue on his desk.
"Negan.. that was.. everything. But seriously, I'm worried about him someone finding out."
"Don't, it doesn't matter, doll. I already gave them my notice."
"Wh-what do you mean?" You asked, pulling your pants up.
"It's my last year here. I got an offer to coach basketball at UGA." He said proudly, smiling at you while pulled his shirt back over his head.
You were speechless for a moment. "Negan.. are you serious?! That's where I'm going."
He walked over, pulling you in for a kiss. "Exactly."
ily: @loganlostitall @chaospossum @negansbabydoll66 @redqueenphoenix @n3g5nx @crustyweirdo @youngpersonaathletebear @sadgirlzluvdilfs @ilovebill-and-gustav @neganscumbucket @manipulatorpoem @im-a-goddamn-cat @raininhell @mahogany-cherry-wine @daryldixmedown @munsonslovergirl @sanctuaryforthelost @thelauraborealis @carlgrimesbbg @c3linesworld @blueheisenbergtragedy @startwinklekitty @darlingmadelinee @oceandeepthirst @jschlattsqtip @lavenderchai @sweetbutpsychobutsweet @neganswoman @n7crophiliac @cats-writing @alldevilsarehere90 @natykacenka @queermilfs @stasiaangelsinner @lupa-03 @sadgirlzluvdilfs @pamago-bb @javier-penas-wifexx420 @motelprincess444 @thatonefroggirl @myhappyplaceofstuff @darlingmadelinee @used2beee @easystreet07 @princess-23-xoxo @twdxtrevor @dilfsandmartinis @sarahhxx03 @minaxcarter @kukka-roo @rinsdesires @6kaja9 @sasiiik9174 @fanficwriter5 @theoraekenslover @lunajay33
#jeffrey dean morgan#negan#negan fanfiction#jdmorgan#jdm fanfiction#negan smith#jdm x reader#twd negan#jeffrey dean morgan x reader#jdmfanfiction#negan smith x you#negan smith x reader#negan smut#negan smith smut#negan smith fanfiction#negan x reader#negan x you#negan twd#negan imagine#dead city negan#the walking dead negan#twd fanfiction#twd smut#jdm fanfic#jdm smut#jdm imagine#jeffrey dean morgan x you#jeffrey dean morgan smut#jeffrey dean morgan fanfiction#negan smith x y/n
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Hi dear! I would like to appreciate your works. I really enjoy everything you wrote, Wish you have a great day! 💗
Since you're taking requests, could you please write Wade with a polite, sweet and delicate partners. He's with a person who's the definition of "Too pure for this world and MUST be PROTECTED at all cost" His partner showers him with love and validation, and always love to listen to him! Thanks! 💓
possibly based on real life events.
Wade Wilson is so in love, it must be sickening to everyone around him.
In fact he knows it is and he does not care. He’ll say “look at this meme the love of my life sent me!” and the person who he shows will roll their eyes, as if you don’t have incredible taste in cat pictures. He’ll monologue constantly about how cute you are and how much he loves that scrunchy thing you do with your nose. He’s recited committed-to-memory facts about you so many times that his friends can parrot them too.
“Yes, I know what their favourite film is, I know you took them to a special viewing of it for their birthday. It’s cute, Wade,” says Laura, patting him on the arm condescendingly. Well, it’s not his fault you’re so wonderful! There isn’t a single thing about you that’s not perfect. He’s constantly bowled over about just how much affection he can fit in his body for you. The other night he was going on about something stupid - he can’t even remember what now, maybe it was about the new Taco Bell menu? - and then realised you hadn’t interrupted him once to shut him up like most people would.
You’d looked over the top of your magazine at him when he’d pointed this out, brow cocked.
“Why would I want you to shut up? I like listening to you talk, Wade.”
Marry you. He’s going to marry you. Every day, then divorce you every day too so he can marry you again.
You are probably too good for him. Most of his social circle thinks so. You’re patient and kind, when you’re not at your job - where you work at a charity adopting out senior animals, as if you could be any more of a fucking angel - you like to spend your time in his shitty little kitchen, baking desserts for him to get home to. He’ll find you getting Al to taste test for you and his apartment full of laughter and joy.
Man, he’s definitely put on like, six pounds since the two of you started dating. He needs to be stronger in the face of your cupcakes.
They are really fucking good though.
He walks in that night with a plushie under his arm. It’s a cow. He remembers you mentioning offhand how cute you thought cows were, so he decided to grab the biggest one the toy store one the way home had just because he knows it’ll make you smile. You don’t need any more stuffed toys; you sleep with them all in the bed and they’re pushing him off the side at this point because of their sheer number but, well, he likes seeing you happy.
And then he hears sobbing.
“Sweetheart?” he asks, immediately panicked. Are you injured? Has someone come to hurt you - has he painted a target on your back because of his job? Bile fills his throat as he stumbles forward…
…and there you are, sitting in front of the TV, PlayStation controller in your lap as tears run down your face while the end of the game plays out. Wade has never felt such relief in his life, laughing as the ache of it is taken from his chest. You turn to him with wide, watery eyes.
“Don’t you laugh at me, Wade Wilson!”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But babe… are you crying at the end of Kingdom Hearts?”
“No!” you lie, trying to mop your face off with your sleeve. Then the music hits its crescendo from the crappy speakers and you start wailing all over again.
He loves you. He’d kill a million billion people for you. It would take a hell of a long time but hey, one word and he’d do it. If anyone even lifted a finger to hurt you he’d execute them so thoroughly that every generation of their family would be wiped out of existence too.
To put it in terms you’d approve of, he’d do anything for you. But he also knows you’d never ask him to. You’re just that wonderful.
“… would it help if I got us take-out and you started playing the second one?”
“Uh-huh,” you manage to confirm.
“I could be in this fucking game, beat Donald Duck’s little feathery ass. Disney, make it happen.”
“What?”
“Don’t worry about it. Pizza or Chinese?”
Taglist: @falsewordz @malfoys-demigod @belilwen @mildly-salted @tvwebs @childeslegstrap @getmeoutofhell @s1eep-o @just-a-beatlemaniac69 @yrthr @momopad @sugarplumz100 @captainjinkx @madspads @acrosstheunivcrse @yeethaw13 @na-is-salty @florduarte @hunterispunk
#My writing#mcu x you#mcu x reader#mcu imagines#mcu x y/n#mcu imagine#marvel x you#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#marvel x y/n#deadpool x you#deadpool imagine#deadpool x reader#wade wilson x reader#wade wilson imagine
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Make her happy-Wanda Maximoff
★Pairing: StepMom! Wanda x f!reader
Summary: one day your father brings home a new woman, and then that woman brings you home. drunk. and you're in love with her.
★Warning: NSFW 18+, stepcest, age gap (all legal), mommy kink, praise kink, masturbation, smoking, alcohol, forbidden relationship, mentions of violence, little fluff at the end off course
★Word count: 3k
★AN: there are a few set expressions that are in my native language, but I don’t know how it sounds in English, so I translated it verbatim
There was a crowd of people around. A lot of young people like you, who came here with the same goals: to drink, have fun, maybe find someone for the night, as is usually the case. You never needed a lot of alcohol to start feeling drunk, and after a bottle of beer you were already in high spirits and holding the second one in your hands. Your friends went into pairs and danced together, you looked around: some were kissing as if they were ready to eat each other, some were simply jumping in the music like you, some had already begun to go to separate rooms or to their homes for more private relationships . As always, the student party smelled of alcohol and debauchery. A girl was dancing across from you; you were clearly having fun, even if you didn’t know each other’s names.
You've always had a taste for older women, so it wasn't a surprise when you realized you liked your stepmom. Your parents divorced when you were 11 and immediately after that your mother left for oblivion in another city. At first, out of childish naivety, you tried to call her or write, but as you got older, you realized that your life was no longer her concern. When this realization came to you, there was an unpleasant pang somewhere in your heart; for the first time you realized that there was no such person who didn’t care about you. Even your father, with whom you stayed to live in your hometown, seemed in no hurry to provide you with parental support and care, you just saw each other at home, as if you were neighbors, but were not close. And then Wanda appeared.
Your father chose not to tell the details of their acquaintance and at first, of course, did not bring her to your house. You just knew that somewhere out there there was another woman named Wanda, who, according to your father, was a real angel and you would definitely make friends with her. Of course, you were overcome by skepticism about this. He said this about Jessica and about Emma and about... and you no longer remembered the names of all his ex-women with whom he tried to start an affair after your mother left. Generally speaking, you didn't expect anything. But when their relationship (as your father thought) reached a new level, Wanda showed up at your house. You were a little over 19 at that time and you were studying at college not far from home, God knows why, but you didn’t want to go somewhere else to a life full of uncertainty and doubt. Of course, the factor that living with your father was easier financially and domestically also played a role; you knew that your small salary as a salesperson and an even more meager stipend would not be enough for the same comfortable life as you had now.
As you walked out of your room to the sound of the door opening and two people talking, Wanda greeted you with the most beautiful smile you had ever seen. You just stood there in your pajamas and stupid bunny slippers and stared unblinkingly at the woman with the big green eyes. The thought “what someone like Wanda saw in your father” even flashed through your head, even if it was wrong to think so. From that day on, the woman became a frequent guest in your home, and gradually in your thoughts.
One day, walking past a room that belonged to your father, who was not at home at that moment, you looked into a small gap from the door that was not completely closed and stood in place, as if stuck to the floor. Wanda stood with her back to the door and pulled the straps of a lacy black frameless bra over her shoulders. In the mirror that was a little to the side, you saw the reflection of her full breasts, the barely visible outlines of her nipples and her soft, toned stomach. You knew that you shouldn’t do this, at least for reasons of personal space, and at most for moral reasons, but you couldn’t help yourself, this sight fascinated you so much. Your mouth watered and your breath caught in your throat as you watched the woman who was your stepmom. When Wanda started to turn around to take a red knitted sweater from the bed, you jumped away from the door as if struck by an electric shock and quickly went to the kitchen, turning on the kettle and carefully pretending to choose between several types of coffee. A minute later, the older woman joined you, making her presence known with her hands sliding softly over your waist. Of course, your trembling at this action did not escape her attention.
In the end, Wanda finally settled in your house and with each passing month her presence drove you more and more crazy. It seemed like she deliberately didn’t close the door all the way when she went to change clothes or take a shower, putting on a little show for you. Her touches, which were unusual for you, gave you goosebumps, but due to the lack of warm relationships in the family, you thought that all “parents” do this: they hug you from behind and leave soft kisses at the base of your neck. One small incident became the point of no return for you personally.
You have never been a morning person, if in the morning and during the day all you dreamed of was a sound sleep, invariably with the onset of night a small hyperactive motor would start up inside, but perhaps your insomnia was also to blame. The clock showed 2:34 when your eyes scanned the Tik Tok feed and you giggled at stupid videos with animals, before having managed to take turns drawing, then reading, and so on in a circle. The apartment was quiet, only the sound of the clock ticking away the seconds, disturbing the peace of the heated spring air. You took off your massive headphones and pressed the off button when you heard some strange sounds somewhere behind the wall in the back where your father's room was and... oh. You held your breath and listened more closely, but there was no need because Wanda didn’t seem to be trying very hard to control herself. Every second, the woman’s screams of pleasure were muffled to your ears and an insistent pulsation settled between your thighs. With every sound coming from her mouth, a hot wave appears in the bottom of your stomach and the desire to relieve it was driving you crazy. Then for the first time you did THIS with thoughts about your stepmom.
The hand pulled the pajama pants down your legs along with ruined panties. When you pushed two fingers inside, your pussy was already wet and ready for invasion. You focused your mind on the image of the woman behind the wall and your own moans were drowned in the pillow. You imagined how her hips were rolling now, how her breasts were bouncing, her soft tender skin, in your mind there was only Wanda.
You look in prostration at the boiling kettle when a familiar hand strokes your lower back. "Good morning, my dear." You don't look at her, cheeks turning red from the events of this night. "Good morning." You drink your coffee in silence, you avoid her gaze. The click of a lighter breaks the ringing emptiness between you. A woman lights a cigarette and the smell of tobacco reaches you; a hand with a red manicure hands you a pack. It’s not that you hid your bad habits, but you didn’t allow yourself to do it in front of your father. A sigh leaves your lips and you take one, Wanda strikes the lighter and brings the fire to the tip of the cigarette between your lips. Nicotine hits your head and everyone is dizzy from harmful pleasure. "How did you sleep?" She asks as if she's mocking you. Only now did you notice that she was wearing a light night dress, which did not hide her breasts too much. You try your best not to look there, your gaze runs from her face to her chest several times and she sees it perfectly. “Like dead.”
The party was in full swing, the second bottle of beer was finished and thrown into the trash. It was your friend's friend's house or something like that. You stood in the kitchen and poured yourself some water, hoping that there would be lemon in the refrigerator. Someone’s arms wrapped around your waist from behind and you were scared because the body pressed against your back was clearly taller and larger than you. “Baby, do you want to go upstairs?” You immediately disentangled yourself from the unwanted hug and looked at the guy you saw a couple of times in college, but didn’t even know his name or what year he was in. “Who are you anyway?!” He made another attempt to come closer, but you had already jumped away towards the living room with a crowd of people. “Come on, don’t pretend, that’s how you look at me in college.” You were confused. “What are you talking about? I don't even know who the hell you are." You turned and started to leave, but his strong hand grabbed you, holding you in place. “No, I didn’t finish.” His grip was strong and you had already imagined all the worst possible scenarios, but like a blessing from above, your friend appeared. “Dude, haven’t you mixed up anything? Do you want us to go out now and I’ll put your brains back in place a couple of times?” You were immediately free. The guy raised his hands in surrender. “Okay okay, take it easy man.” He retreated as quickly as he appeared. You were shaking a little from the situation and you immediately took out your phone, finding Wanda’s contact.
“Y/N how are you? I don’t know who called him here, do you want to go outside?” You shook your head in reluctance. “Everything is okay, I’m drunk and I’ll probably go home. Wanda will pick me up." Your father was not in the city; in truth, he began to go on business trips too often, which aroused certain suspicions. Wanda saw this too and began to understand where everything was going. The answer came immediately, as if she had been waiting for this message. “I’ll be there in 20 minutes.” Her text message said.
After saying goodbye to your friends in the driveway, you got into Wanda's red Volvo, where the woman interrogate you about what had happened. “What an asshole.” You were already at home in the kitchen and the woman was swearing under her breath while she made you both hot tea. She changed into her home clothes, back into one of her light night dresses. Your alcohol-fogged brain was screaming to touch her. You watched her body move under the thin silk fabric and legs themselves carried you in the right direction. Wanda was stirring sugar in her tea when your arms grabbed hers and you pressed your body against her back, burying your face in her hair, inhaling the aroma of shampoo. The woman mentally smiled at your gesture of tenderness. "What is a cute girl?" She reached out her hand and slide it in your disheveled hair, slightly pulling back the tufts of hair. The little whine escaped you and you pressed yourself closer to her, as if you were trying to become one with her. “You smell like beer and cigarettes Y/N.” Well, it was a statement of fact, so it’s not offensive. You nuzzled her neck and Wanda turned in your arms. Now was, if not ideal, then a great moment to lay all the cards on the table. “How dare this bastard touch what’s mine.” She whispered it on your lips and your heart sank. “Wanda...you...” The words died between your lips as the older woman pulled you into a kiss. Out of shock, you didn’t immediately answer her, but quickly relaxed and attacked her lips, pressing the woman into the kitchen counter.
“Wanda...I...” You tried to convey your thoughts about your feelings for her between kisses. “Hush, pretty girl...I know everything.” You stopped and looked at her with wide eyes. The older woman laughed and took your face in her hands. “Did you really think that I wouldn’t notice anything? Oh what a sweet little thing." Everything seemed too good a dream, the woman was about to take you to her room, but you stood on the threshold, refusing to go there. “No, come to me.” You clearly didn't like the idea of doing this with Wanda in the bed where she slept with your father. Then you remembered who she is to you and how you both act towards him. “Wait, but my father...You are his wife.” “And it only started to bother you now? Oh don't worry about it baby, he's been cheating on me for a long time and I want to file for divorce. Just don’t tell him.” She winked and closed your bedroom door behind her. She didn't seem upset about it.
Wanda was lying on your big soft bed, surrounded by plush animals, her housedress riding up to her hips and it was too good to be true. It seemed that you would wake up and everything would be over. You didn't care about taking off your dirty street clothes, all that mattered now was the woman underneath you. “Come on baby, make mommy happy, make me cum.” The title that Wanda gave herself completely drove you insane and you tore the silk from her body, leaving only panties decorated with lace. Even though you were on top, Wanda controlled the situation. Her skillful hands and voice guided you on how to do better.
Your knee put pressure between the older woman's thighs, which you held with your hands so tightly that they would leave bruises later. Her skin was as soft as you imagined and Wanda held your hair and guided you to her breasts, encouraging you to play with her nipples. You were ready to suffocate between her breasts, you liked them so much. Your lips wrapped around her nipple and grip on your hair tightened. “That's such a good girl, now give me your hand.” She guided you between your legs where underwear was soaked with arousal. When your finger brushed over her swollen clit, she flexed and grabbed your hair tighter. “You’re so wet, I need to try it, can I?” You whined, desperate to please.
She was completely naked in front of you and your mouth was watering at the sight. “You are even more beautiful than I imagined.” Your lips peppered her stomach with small kisses. “Did you imagine me naked, baby? Mmm I bet you were touching yourself when you thought about it.” She again directed your head, but this time to her pulsating center, and before diving between her folds, you decided to add fuel to the fire. “To be honest, I heard you scream while you were fucking with my father and while listening I touched myself right here on this bed.” You said this and your lips wrapped around her swollen bud, causing Wanda to arch her back. She squeezed around nothing and you put three fingers into her at once, twist them so that each time they hit her sensitive spot. "Yes Yes! That’s my good girl, you make mommy feel so good!” She screamed into the emptiness of the apartment and fidgeted all over your face. You pounded into her at a fast pace and added a fourth finger. After a few minutes, her walls began to tighten around you and she came, squeezing your head with her thighs as if she were going to crush you.
When she relaxed, you rose to her lips and brought you together. “Did I do good mommy?” You whispered in her ear, biting her earlobe. "Yeah baby." You lay under her side playing with her tits, sometimes kissing her shoulder. The woman stroked your cheek and lifted your face, urging you to look into her eyes. "Do you want to be with me?" The question took you by surprise and you remained silent. Wanda took this as a refusal and turned to the other side, covering her naked body with a blanket. "I understand." It came muffled from her. The last thing you wanted to do was upset her, especially since you wanted to be her girlfriend more than anything.
You got up from the bed and the older woman thought that you were leaving, but you walked around the bed and sat down in front of her so that you could see her face. "Yes, I want to be with you. I think I love you Wanda." After these words, she crawled out of her homemade cocoon and extended her hands to you. You crawled into her arms.
"What will happen next?" Your question hung in the air. More than anything, you hated uncertainty. Wanda turned to look at you. “I will divorce with your father and move into my old apartment. We can see each other without hiding it, he’s unlikely to mind.” You nodded but remained silent, encouraging her to continue. “I don’t think he should know about our new type of relationship, of course, but that’s just for him.” You nodded again. It was like something self-explanatory. In your dreams, you had already moved into Wanda’s apartment, but you didn’t tell her.
"So what is next?" A grin settled on her face. “And then baby, I’d like to think about your satisfaction.” She said as she pulled your clothes off.
#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda fanfic#wanda maximoff imagine#wandanat#wandanat x reader#wanda x you#wanda maximoff smut#wanda x reader#mommy wanda#wanda marvel
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MASTERLIST
>> Learn a little about me and my writing here <<
Everything is in order from oldest to newest. Unfortunately, all of my 2015 blurbs and one-shots got deleted from Wattpad, and I didn't have them saved anywhere else, so we begin with 2016.
The 2016 Blurbs
Taboo You and Harry have a little fun in the bathroom during a party.
Victoria's Secret Harry meets Victoria, a beautiful plus-size woman, at a party and is quite smitten with her.
The One Where Harry Tries to Win You Back When Harry cancels your date again, you decide to go out alone.
Drunk Me Is Like Regular Me You and Harry have a cute and silly evening together. AKA, Harry can’t help being cute, even when he’s drunk.
Happy Place While staying at a cabin with friends, Harry comforts you when you’re feeling down.
You're Never This Quiet Harry has been quiet all evening and you wonder why.
You Said You'd Never Leave You worry that you can no longer handle being Harry’s girlfriend.
Show Me Your Texts, or It's Over Harry finds out you've been in contact with your ex and gives you an ultimatum.
Just for the Record After returning home from a concert with Harry, you share a smoke and a bed.
Scars You have scars and are hesitant about letting Harry see you naked for the first time.
I Miss You You’ve grown frustrated and lonely because Harry is always busy.
Best Friends You and Harry are best friends, but he would love for it be more.
Rooms On Fire (The Morning After) You meet Harry Styles at a party and have an amazing night.
Slave 4 U 2 Harry is ready to take you home for a little role play.
The Opera You and Harry can’t keep your hands off each other at the opera.
My Home You and Harry visit his family, but you have to stay in Gemma’s room.
A Night Out with Harry You take care of Harry after a drunken night out.
Back For You Harry is in town, and you go visit him at the hotel.
Melt A sexy evening with Harry.
Heartstrings You become One Direction’s new guitarist and you and your best friend Harry realize you have feelings for each other.
What's It Like You can’t sleep and decide to pay Harry a visit in the next room.
The Lucky One Harry is not too pleased when you run into your old high school crush at a restaurant.
Too Long It’s been too long since you and Harry have had sex.
Anniversary Pancakes Harry and his daughter make breakfast for his wife on their anniversary
We're Gonna Have a Baby Telling Harry he’s gonna be a dad.
Lyrics and Melodies: AM A very smitten Harry takes Julia back to his place for drinks and more music.
Claiming His Territory Harry gets jealous when he thinks another guy fancies you, and he decides to claim his territory.
This Is Me You're Talking To You and Harry are divorced, but you both still have feelings for each other.
Meeting Harry Styles After actress Mia Tangelo meets Harry Styles at a One Direction concert, he surprises her by showing up at her film premiere.
What Are You Doing New Year's Eve? Harry invites Rebecca to his Christmas party, but she overthinks too much, misinterpreting his intentions and nearly missing out on her chance to be with him on New Year’s Eve.
Kiss Me Kiss Me Samantha and Harry’s story of young romance and a first kiss.
Sweat Some post-workout sex.
Saturday Night Harry needs comforting after his performance on SNL.
Live From New York Harry’s on SNL and he gets a little jealous when he thinks you’re not there for him.
Leather and Lace The night Harry sang with Stevie at the Troubadour.
I Wish That It Could Be Like That An affair with Harry has taken its toll and is no longer enough.
Faithfully Harry shares the story of how you two met and fell in love.
Running On Empty An unfortunate incident at the gym.
Sometimes It Be That Way Soon after a breakup, Lilliana met Harry…but their relationship may have been doomed from the start.
Stones T-Shirt Commenting on Harry’s Rolling Stones shirt at a party leads to going to a concert with him.
Carrot Cake Harry has something he’s been wanting to ask Y/N, but the timing is never right.
Kinda Perfect It’s a girls’ night out and Harry shows up, but you decide not to let your new friend Tiffany know that Harry is your boyfriend.
What Happens In Vegas... Your Vegas trip to celebrate your friend’s birthday turns into a night you hadn’t expected when you meet Harry Styles in the casino.
Easy Like Sunday Morning It's your last day with Harry before he leaves.
Connect Not wanting to lose their connection, Lily takes a surprise trip to see Harry.
Comfort Food Jessica, a self-proclaimed foodie, helps her classmate Harry study for their Biology test.
Her Album Harry has finished recording his album, and he wants her to hear it. [in Harry's POV]
Ruin the Friendship It’s Ella’s birthday, and her best friend Harry plans to tell her how he feels about her.
You and I Alyssa always wanted Harry, so every time he called, she was there waiting for him at the bar. But one night, things shifted between them.
Rain Rain Lexie is on her way to visit her sister, and she’s taking Harry on the road trip with her, planning to drop him off at his friend’s house for a wedding. But the weather has other plans.
That Sunday, That Summer Kelly’s roommate Bianca talks her into participating in a celebrity charity scavenger hunt that Harry Styles surprisingly attends.
Friends Don't Harry and Gabriella have been good friends for a few years. But neither of them knows the feelings the other has.
Mistletoe & Holly Harry finally reveals to his friend Holly how he feels about her on her birthday…which just happens to be Christmas.
Dressing For Revenge // Part 2 Still heartbroken from finding your ex cheating on you, you go to a nightclub with your friend Kelsie, where not only do you run into your ex, but also a handsome gentleman who’s willing to help you get over him.
Kiss Me Deadly The annual Halloween party at the local pub has Y/N excited when she decides to invite her boss at the University, Mr. Styles. But she soon begins to second guess her decision when Harry starts acting odd. Is Harry Styles really who she thinks he is? Will this Halloween be a fantasy come true…or the kiss of death?
Through the Wall Harry is your handsome neighbour, and you keep hearing him through the wall.
bad idea harry styles is back from uni and he looks better than you remember. problem is, he's your ex's brother.
break up with your girlfriend, i'm bored part 2 of bad idea - after that one night with harry, you can't stop thinking about him...but things don't exactly turn out like you'd hoped.
Touch You’ve been having a hard time getting yourself off, so your roommate Harry offers a hand.
Filthy Cute You and Harry are in a secret relationship, and you get a little jealous when you think he’s flirting with your friend.
Out of Bounds After a few years of being a housewife, Tisa Jordan decided to go back to school. Hoping to find inspiration and a new direction in life, she didn’t expect to meet Harry Styles, a handsome British twenty-year-old. [39 chapters]
Cubicle I’m Harry. I have a mundane job where I sit in a cubicle all day. But things just got better because the hottest babe just started working here. And I’m determined to make her mine, even if just for one night. I’m Roni. I just started this new job, but all I can think about is the hottie in the corner cubicle. I think he likes me too. [22 chapters]
Fratboy Harry Harry Styles was a boy with a reputation, one that you couldn’t care less about. Yet one night at a frat party changed everything. [10 parts]
The Entertainer Set in the 70s, Sky Jones, a young woman from L.A., meets Harry Styles, an up-and-coming musician and frontman for the band Wildfire. Told in first person from Sky’s point of view, she shares her journey and what it’s like to fall for a rockstar. [10 parts]
Too Far From Texas Stacey Barnett is a writer and a single mother. Her hands full with two daughters (one with special needs), a newly published novel, an extroverted best friend and a controlling ex-husband, the last thing she expects is to meet an international pop star. [33 chapters]
Seven Six Five They met once seven years ago. Now music has made them cross paths again. (Real Harry x Plus Size OC, enemies to lovers) [6 parts]
Tattooed Heart You are a cocktail waitress at a swanky lounge. Harry comes in one night, and you instantly dislike him. But another encounter eventually changes your opinion. (Tattoo artist!harry x waitress y/n, enemies to lovers) [6 parts]
The Entertainer II * Updates will be sporadic * What if it wasn’t the end? What if Sky did actually see Harry at the Forum in the early 80s, and he saw her too? What if fate took hold of them both, and they realized their journey was not over? Set in 1981, Harry and Sky’s story continues with more music, more romance, and a few more twists and turns.
Wild Horses * Updates will be sporadic * Amber Crosby didn’t end up with the life she’d expected, but that didn’t keep her from following her dream. A young, up and coming country recording artist, she and her band set out to do just that. Trying to leave her past behind, it wasn’t until meeting Harry Styles that she realized just how her life could take a turn and alter her future forever.
Ko-fi (if you're feeling generous and would like to support me)
Inbox (for requests, feedback or general chat)
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#harry styles#masterlist#harry styles masterlist#lemoncrushh#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fan fiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fic#harry styles smut#harry styles one shot#harry styles blurb#harry styles imagine#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles writing#harry styles x yn#harry fic#harry fanfic#harry fanfiction#harry fan fic#harry fan fiction#harry smut#harry angst#slow burn#enemies to lovers#friends to lovers#rockstar!harry#artist!harry#tattoo artist!harry#harry styles fan fic
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hi i love your writing unfortunately there aren't many fics for the iwtv so tysm!!
i was wondering if you could write something about louis lestat and claudia with a (vamp?) reader that accidently timetraveld
Back In My Arms | Lestat x Reader x Louis
ෆ time traveling accidentally and you're able to relive bittersweet memories.
thank you and I agree, especially the amc version compared to the movie. The other posts are coming, but I had to rush and get this one out because it was so gut wrenching for me 😭 LOL
“What do you think? The blue or the purple,” you held the dresses to your body.
“I prefer your birthday suit,” Lestat said over the classical music, making you roll your eyes at him. Could he ever be serious when you needed him to be?
“Louis,” you called out, wanting a real opinion.
“Hm? Oh, the purple” he was hardly listening, more focused on the pages of the book.
“So the blue, got it,” you grumbled, storming away, to finish packing your things.
“Ma chèrie, why are you leaving again? It truly makes no sense to me why you remain friends with this mortal,” Lestat said.
“I don't see why you care, it's not like either of you will notice I’m away,” you said, as you closed the bag.
“Don't say that, we do notice,” Louis said, defensively.
“I'll only be away for a night,” you mumbled, checking your appearance in the mirror, and slinging the bag over your shoulder.
“Stay, you can give us a more detailed visual representation of the dresses,” Lestat said, straightening his posture when you scoffed.
“Sex doesn't fix everything”
“It is a start”
“And maybe that's why we’re in the situation we’re in, now, if you'll excuse me, I’m going hang with my mortal friend, who communicates with me and doesn't want to block out our problems with Mozart, books, and sex,” you said, storming out of the townhouse, making sure to slam the door.
Getting into your car, you began to drive to your close friend, George, or Georgie, you called him both. He was middle-aged, although he was closing in on becoming elderly. He'd oftentimes been told he resembled Bill Nye, but those comments usually only made him red in the face, before he sent a storm of swear words at the person, in his thick Cajun accent. Divorced and cut out of his kid's lives, he was lonely, but so were you. Georgie was the only mortal to ever know that you were a vampire, and he made you feel normal.
Although having a few questions at first, he eventually let the matter go, and hardly ever brought it up. The two of you had been friends for nearly a decade now, and you planned to hold on until the bitter end. He wasn't too keen on being turned, scorned by his wife leaving him and his children siding with her. Lestat and Louis weren't comfortable with your friendship at all, but after realizing your relationship was completely platonic and you weren't cutting him out of your life, they grungily accepted him.
As you finally parked in front of Georgie’s house, approaching the door, you shook your head, discovering it was unlocked. Letting yourself in, you locked the door, going to where you'd both hang out for hours, his basement.
“You need to keep your door locked old man, anyone could just walk in here,” you said, going down the stairs. Tossing your bag onto the couch you'd usually sleep on, in the windowless room.
“Nobody comes here but you,” he said, making you laugh.
“So how is it going?” you asked, sitting in a nearby chair.
“A little more progress than last time, how are things at home?”
“Lestat is…well Lestat and Louis will always act like our issues aren't there,” you shrugged.
“Have you tried talking to them?”
“Of course, Lestat doesn't take anything seriously enough, and Louis wants to brush over it all,” you said.
“Hopefully, this is a success, because then we can fix everything,” Georgie smiled.
“Maybe you, but I don't see my problems being fixed”
“Don't underestimate science,” he told you.
Georgie had been working on an actual time-machine portal. He believed if he could go back in time, undo his mistakes, could prioritize his family over work, maybe that would stop his wife from having an affair with the neighbor, from leaving him and draining his wallet, and taking his children who he couldn't even get a happy birthday from.
He insisted that you would be able to use it, to repair your companionship. A long time had passed since 1910 and much tragedy and heartbreak happened. Separating from each other and eventually reconnecting, recently everything had been so stagnant and bland. No energy to argue about obvious conflicts, but unwilling to leave each other again and be forced to deal with the pain.
“Oh, my goodness,” Georgie stood up, his hand going to his chest. Your eyes widened, worried that he would croak.
“What is it?” you asked, you couldn't sense any internal issues, noticing his thoughts were jumping for joy.
“I think…I think it works,” he said, as he began to type on the nearby computer. The pod he'd spent years building, lit up, the white light faint.
“It turns on, how will you know if it works for real?” you asked.
“Could you maybe catch a few raccoons, rats, birds, anything, we can try on them,” he asked. Standing up, you went outside, quickly grabbing a rat from near the drainage, bringing it to him.
“Done,” you smiled, holding it firm, tossing it in the pod, as he opened the door. The rat squeaked a bit, running in circles, as Georgie typed.
The machine began to make a noise before the rat burst. It’s guts splattering on the door.
“Ew, what happened?” you asked him, pressing against the door, to look inside in disgust.
“It seems like it is releasing some sort of radiation, too strong for animals and people, I'll have to keep working on it,” he grumbled disappointedly.
“I could try it if you want,” you offered.
“The radiation will be damaging-
“In case you forgot, I’m hardly human anymore, I am a bit intrigued, the worst thing that could honesty happen is I get burned up, and I’ll heal,” you said, as he faced you.
“Are you sure? I don't want you to feel like you have to do this, Y/n,” he said, but you brushed him off.
“Trust me, I don't, but you've put so much time into this, almost as long as I've known you, I want this to work out for you,” you said.
“Okay, let me get suited up, to clean it first,” he said, changing into the nbc suit to clean the inside of the pod. While waiting for him, you checked your phone, seeing a message from Louis.
“Sending a picture of the dress, I’m sure you look beautiful as always”
Smiling softly, you set your phone on the counter, taking your shoes off, watching as Georgie scrubbed the blood away. Little did Louis know, you wouldn't be wearing the dress to go hunting tonight. As soon as he finished cleaning, he was back at your side, typing on the monitor.
“We’ll do, let's say 5 minutes into the future, I’ll think of a number and when you come back, tell me the number, and time it to see if there is a significant change in time,” he said, as you nodded in agreement, accepting the small stopwatch, stepping into the pod.
Your arms at your sides, you briefly gave him a thumbs up, hoping to reassure his anxious thoughts. Typing on the computer, the pod began to light up again, the noise leaking out before it started to shake. Standing up, Georgie stood with his eyes wide, his jaw dropping as you vanished.
“Oh my Lord, it's working,” he said, his hand shakily went to his mouth.
Back at home, Louis and Lestat were relaxing, leisurely lounging around when it happened. A sudden feeling of dread washed over them as if you were gone. Glancing at each other, both of them stood up, rushing from the house to your friend, George's home. Bursting through the door, they went downstairs.
George looked back, gasping, surprised to see the elder vampires. However, before he could say anything or move, Lestat had him pressed against the wall, his hand around his neck.
“What did you do?”
“M-machine,” he choked out, looking over at the pod.
“Lestat, look,” Louis said, staring at the pod, fog seeping from the bottom.
“What is this?” he continued, looking to George.
“Time machine,” he struggled to say, before Lestat dropped him.
“You didn't put her into your experiment,” Louis said out loud, shaking his head, already pacing the floor.
“She offered, and it was only five minutes into the fut-
Suddenly, within the fog, you could be seen, smiling in excitement from the exhilaration of the atoms passing through your body. Your smile quickly faltered, seeing your lovers and a nervous Georgie.
“What are you doing here?” you asked.
“Get her out of it, now,” Lestat told Georgie.
“Leave him alone,” you argued.
“This isn't safe, Y/n, we thought you were gone,” Louis told you.
“Don't parent me, Louis”
“Get her out of it now, or it will be destroyed,” Lestat said, shoving George into the computer, his hands smashing against the keyboard.
“Stop it, Lestat,” you yelled.
“What did you do?” George stressed, as the machine lit up. Typing as quickly as possible, he couldn't see the results that he needed.
“Y/n, he made me press a few buttons, it is going to the past, I don't know how far, but I’m going to fix it,” Georgie said apologetic.
“What?” Lestat and Louis said at the same time.
“Do not kill him, fucking asshole,” you said before vanishing.
“Can you bring her right back?” Louis asked.
“I don't even know how far it has brought her”
“Well figure it out,” Lestat snapped.
“This is your fault, she told me all about you and your ugly ways,” George said. Tilting his head, Lestat was about to reach for him, but Louis grabbed his arm.
“He has to bring her back to us,” he reminded him.
“She is going somewhere in the 19th century, I can't pinpoint where and when. Time should be a little longer through the pod, so I’d estimate a few hours for us if it is a success”
“For us?” Louis asked.
“IF it is a success?” Lestat screamed at the same time as him. George truly didn't understand what you saw in the dramatic man, other than his good looks.
“I've been studying this for some time now and with time travel, it could feel like days, or even longer, but in reality, it should only be a few hours, and I say if because we haven't tried going to the past. The pod isn't sustainable for the undead and Y/n getting in was the first actual progress of real-time travel,” he explained.
“Maybe one of us could go in and-
“No, that is the worst solution, we don't know where she went, so I wouldn't know where to send you and it is only one pod, and overloading the database is the last thing that needs to happen, we’ll give it a few hours,” George said, standing.
“Where are you going?” Lestat asked him.
“Have a glass of wine, if it could take a few hours, I’m going to relax for a while, you're free to make yourselves comfortable,” he said, stepping out of the NBC suit, before going up the stairs.
“We just have to wait,” Louis reassured Lestat, who stood staring at the pod, unable to believe this was happening.
As the pod finally stopped shaking, you peered outside at the change of setting. You were outside, Georgie nowhere to be seen. Turning on the stopwatch, you muttered an apology to him, before punching the thick glass and pushing the door open. Immediately, you recognized the familiarly different environment.
Your bare feet touching the dirt, you recognized the small, poorly built houses. You hadn't seen these houses in ages after Katrina wiped the remaining pieces away.
“Hey, what are you doing-
“You saw no one here, and you won't let anyone get near this precious contraption, now go on inside,” you glamoured the man, watching as he went back up the stairs, into the house.
Sighing, you began to leave the area, ignoring the strange stares. From the way everyone dressed, you were somewhere between the first three decades of the 19th century, and you were sticking out like a sore wearing the knee-length sundress. There was only one place you knew to go, to be sure of the date.
Coming to a complete stop in front of your home, you could see the lights on. Taking a deep breath, you reminded yourself that if they were here, this wasn't the same Louis and Lestat you were having issues with, and so you'd have to act accordingly.
Opening the door, you could hear the shuffling of feet and the sound of furniture being torn apart. Furrowing your eyebrows, you went upstairs, surprised to see them in that room. Making eye contact with Louis, he did a double take.
“Y/n,” he said, taken away by your beautiful, he hadn't seen a dress made in such a way before, shorter than average, but still classy.
Hearing your name, Lestat opened that lovely pink coffin, climbing out, and tossing the diary to the side.
“Ma chérie, you stopped for shopping?” he asked, a small smirk in place.
“Did you see her?” Louis finally asked. At a loss of words, you struggled to speak for a moment.
“I'm sorry, I'm not feeling like myself, what year is it?” you asked.
“1920, you alright?” Louis asked, approaching you.
“Look who finally decided to crawl home to her coffin and write about her psychosexual behavior,” Lestat spat.
“You read my diary?” hearing that beloved voice, your eyes began to sting.
“Only a little bit,” Louis confessed.
“I read all of it and you are a little deviant brat,” Lestat said, as you slowly turned around. The bloody tears began trickling down your cheeks, as you stared into her eyes. She was real, in the flesh, not a figment from your dreams or old photos, but was here in front of you.
“Claudia,” you said, her name flowing from your lips caused you to visibly tremble.
“Mama,” she started, concerned, her eyes widening as you rushed over, pulling her into a bone-crushing hug.
Weeping bitterly, you held her close, unwilling to let her slip away this time, whispering sweet words of love to her. Confusedly, she hugged you back, as you both sat on the floor, holding her in your arms.
While the two men were originally set on disciplining their wild daughter, their concern now shifted to you.
“Claudia, you've been reckless-
“They're buried in Chalmette,” you interrupted, Lestat, your hand comfortingly brushing over her curls.
“How do you know that?” Louis asked, but you ignored him.
“My beautiful girl,” you whispered, hugging her one last time tightly, before letting her go.
“Are you okay, mama?”
“I couldn't be better at this moment,” you reassured her, kissing her forehead.
“Let her off this time, please, for me, she's still a child, and there will be a time when we wish we still had our beautiful girl staying here with us,” you said, facing them, seeing your blood-stained face, they were beyond concerned.
“It's still a little early for bed, perhaps you'd like to play a game of chess?” you asked her, wiping your eyes and accepting her hand, as she stood up.
Going into the living room, Claudia couldn't help but think about how unusually attentive you were being. Sure, she was just as spoiled as other children, but you never stopped her from being disciplined when you all agreed she needed to be.
“Claudia, you know I love you, right?” you asked her, watching as she set up the game.
“Yes,” she nodded.
“Without you, an eternity isn't the same,” you admitted, as Lestat and Louis came downstairs, joining the two of you.
Your lovers watched you intentively, as you played the game with Claudia. Lestat noticed how you were letting her win, purposely moving to the wrong places, as she took your pieces while showering her with praises.
He couldn't put his finger on it, but something about the interaction seemed different. Any other time you played chess with her, you gave her a challenge, expressing where she was improving or where she needed work. This time, you were treating her like a little child, like you hadn't seen her in forever, or would never see her again.
Time flew and after two long rounds, Louis stood, announcing Claudia needed to go to bed. Groaning, she stood, wanting to stay longer, but you shook your head.
“It's okay, you need your beauty rest, I love you so much, sleep well,” you told her, hugging her firmly once more.
“Love you too,” she mumbled before she was stomping up the stairs.
“Are you sure you are okay, ma chérie?” Lestat asked, as soon as her bedroom door shut.
“I am, I just, the thought of one day losing her, or being apart hurts my soul, our relationship would probably never be the same,” you said, smiling sadly at him.
“Why would we never be the same?”
“Because she's our daughter, and it would take losing her to see how much she is loved, even you, she's so much like you and that's why you clash so much,” you laughed.
“Wouldn't that make us stronger?”
“I wish that was the case, but holding onto the past makes you unable to communicate like you're supposed to-
“Where is all this coming from? Talk to us, what's on your heart?” Louis asked.
“Please don't question me, but there will be a time when we are so weirdly uninterested in each other, and we try to block out our issues with reading, music, and sex,” you said.
“Why though?”
“Holding onto the past”
“Then you'd have to remind us of what is ahead and not behind,” Lestat said, leaning down, pecking your lips.
Feeling your face burn from the passionate kiss, you looked down, your eyes widening noticing your fingers faded. You have watched enough sci-fi movies with Georgie to know it was time for you to leave.
“I need to make a quick run-
“The sun will be up in another hour,” Louis told you.
“I know, I won't be long, love you both,” you said, pecking both of their lips, before running out of the house.
As you ran back to the backyard, you were surprised to see the man back outside.
“What are you doing?” you asked him, seeing as he sat on the steps, watching the pod.
“I saw some kids run back here, so I’m just watching this contraption,” he shrugged. Staring at the man, you recognized him, Georgie’s grandfather, but much younger. You had seen the few photos hanging up on the house and you identified the face quickly.
“If you had advice for a future relative, a son or grandson, what would you tell him?”
“Life gets hard, we make mistakes, and we lose people, but we have to hold onto the better part of things. I get divorced, but I was able to experience a beautiful marriage, same with children, I was fortunate to experience fatherhood”
“Beautifully said, go get some rest,” you said, glamouring him, watching as he nodded, going inside.
Carefully stepping over the broken glass, you cautiously stepped inside, shutting the door, as the fog came back, the machine lighting up, before you were gone.
“Anything?”
“You just asked me that a few minutes ago, please, have some damn patience,” George said to Lestat, who was pestering him about you. The man was trying as hard as he could and Lestat did not care one bit.
Suddenly, the pod lit up, the fog coming back. Typing on the computer the door opened, before you stepped out, your feet dirty.
“I was away 6 hours and 40 minutes, how long has it been?” you asked, tossing Georgie the stopwatch.
“2 long hours, you've been crying,” Louis said, going to pull you into a hug.
“I saw her, our girl, she was perfect,” you said, feeling him stiffen in your arms before his shoulders shuttered from crying.
“What was she doing?” he asked.
“She had gotten in trouble, but I convinced you both to let it go, and we spent time together,” you said, as he smiled, nodding.
“You told her you loved her?” he asked, hopeful.
“Yes,” you nodded, as the hug tightened before he pulled away.
“And you told me something, so valuable,” you said, shifting to Lestat.
“Of course I did,” he smirked.
“You told me to remind you both of what is ahead of us and not our past,” you said, watching as he dabbed his eyes, stopping any tears on his part.
“Sounds like something I’d say, I guess,” he grinned.
“Are you ready to come home? I know you're probably exhausted from all of this?” Louis asked, grabbing your bag when you nodded.
Glancing at Georgie, who stood awkwardly waiting for you to finish with your reunion. Moving away from Lestat, you stood in front of your good friend, before pulling into a hug.
“Someone dear to you told me some valuable advice I want to share with you,” you smiled.
“Okay”
“Life gets hard, we make mistakes, and we lose people, but we have to hold onto the better part of things. Our past isn't meant to be changed, but rather we embrace the experience, both good and bad, because it shapes us into who we are. You might not be able to get your marriage back, but you could try to reach out to your children, Georgie,” you said, smiling as he teared up, agreeing with you.
“We have our own affairs to handle,” Lestat groaned, ready to leave the tiny basement.
“Shh,” Louis nudged him before you followed the two out of the house.
“Now that I think about Lestat was more charming back then, but now it's you, Louis,” you said, both of you laughing as Lestat scoffed, going on a rant about his greatness.
You missed Claudia greatly, but you had to keep moving, you all did. You still had an eternity of life, but maybe one day, just maybe, when you're reunited, she'll be where she belongs, back in your arms.
#lestat de lioncourt x reader#lestat x reader#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac x reader#louis x reader#interview with the vampire#amc iwtv
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Yuri Manga for New (AND Not-So-New) Readers
I was talking on discord about some good yuri for beginners, and figured I'd repost here.
I get way more detailed some of these recommendations in this post, and there's great recs from another person too! Check it out!
I'm doing this accounting to various tones and tastes, so what works as a beginner yuri for one person might not for another, just read the info to figure out what your jam is.
I'll put a star by the ones about adults (which is the majority of them) since I've found that's always something people want.
Goodbye my Rose Garden (Victorian yuri w/ beautiful art, just beautiful all around)*
How Do We Relationship? (messy adult relationships and lots of actually realistic intimacy)*
She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat- (A woman loves to cook but doesn’t have a huge appetite, only to find the woman next door to her does! She cooks for her and they really start to bond over food and the trials of being working adults. Yes, this is the one where the woman googles lesbian. It's really good)*
Bloom into You- a common go-to yuri for beginners for a reason, about a girl who believes she can't fall in love meeting a girl who wants to date her specifically BECAUSE she can't fall in love. Find out more about it and hear my thoughts here. It has a gorgeous anime that doesn't cover the complete story.
Doughnuts Under the Crescent Moon (sweet office lady romance, ace rep) *
Catch These Hands! (These two women were delinquents and rivals in high school, they meet up again, one reveals she was always into the other, she challenges her to a fight on the condition that if the other woman loses she'll date her. Lots of slapsticky fun and great for any lover of girl delinquents)*
Run away with me, Girl (there's some abuse shown in this one, but it's a story about healing, the premise is these girls dated in high school, but one of the pressured herself "normal" and marry a man, that man turns out to be abusive, so when the former lovers reunite, they decide to run away together. It's got beautiful art and a well done story)*
The Moon on a Rainy Night (absolutely spectacular, explores the relationship between a hard of hearing girl and her closeted classmate, the characters are complex and the writing is so good!)
Kase-san And...- Starting with Kase-san and the Morning Glories, this is a very fluffy and sweet high school romance. It also has a short movie. (as the manga goes on they become college students, too)
The Two of Them Are Pretty Much Like This (slice of life about a voice actress and anime screenwriter who live together as a couple. Unfortunately the ending is a bit abrupt (and likely premature) but I love their relationship)*
My fave Otherside Picnic is great for scifi and (mild) horror lovers. It's Scifi creepypasta adventure yuri. It's a slow burn but does truly spectacularly deliver on the gay. Has an anime, it's not great, you should start with the novels. Wrote an article here. https://www.animefeminist.com/how-otherside-picnic-masterfully-uses-horror-to-explore-abuse-and-show-healing-queer-love/ *(v young adults, college students)
The Guy She was Interested in Wasn't a Guy at All: (A web manga about a girl who works at a record shop. Her classmate , Aya, wanders in but doesn't recognize her because she has her hair hidden with a hat and is wearing a face mask, and Aya assumes she's a guy. They bond over music and slowly start to get closer...and Aya's finds her heart is fluttering not only over this mysterious boy, but her female classmate that seems a lot like him...) It's going to get a physical release soon.
I Married my Best Friend to Shut My Parents Up (girl and her friend get married simply so her parents will stop bugging her about being single. You can probably guess where it goes from there) *
I Married my Female Friend (similar premise, except no parents involved, it's a platonic marriage they both agreed to with the promise they'll divorce if one of them falls in love. But one woman has decidedly not platonic feeling for the other that she's hiding from her, so It will likely turn romantic, it hasn't all come out here yet so I haven't finished it)*
Monthly in the Garden with my Landlord* (it didn't really hit with me but I might give it a shot again, it's solid despite the terrible title, a woman moves into a house and finds she'll be cohabitating with an idol) (Some more titles I haven't fully read that could appeal: After Hours*, Still Sick*, Cheerful Amnesia*)
My Cute Little Kitten (two roommates adopt a cat...and maybe fall in love?)*
I think all of those work as solid intro- though it does depend on what flavor you're looking for!
This article also covers some of these recs and some manga I didn't mention due to not having completely read it. so check it out: The Beginners Guide to Yuri Manga.
Here's some titles to try when you're a little more familiar with yuri (or you can try them now! I'm not your boss!)
SHWD (action yuri that's taking forever to come out over here physically, featuring extremely muscular women fighting monsters. I think it was forced to end prematurely too)*
Kiss and White Lily for my Dearest Girl: (I'm only three volumes in, but it's really enjoyable. The main storyline is about two academic rivals, where one is determined to rank first in class, and the other is an effortless genius who becomes intrigued at the possibility of someone beating her. Honestly they have the kind of messy combative sexual tension I wish we'd see more often in yuri because it's so good. The story follows other couples too. However, big warning for some nonconsensual kisses in the first volume at least).
Sweet Blue Flowers/Aoi Hana- (This one is a little bit dated, and boy is the ending weirdly paced, but a lot still holds up imo. A painful and sweet coming of age tale, it also has an anime that's good but ends too soon.
One teenage characters backstory involves incestuous (older cousin) the perpetrator of which pulls the "oh no did I turn you gay? thing" but it's definitely framed as a bad thing. )
Yuri is My Job- a story about messy lesbians in a yuri-themed cafe, and how their real relationships differ from the personas they put on. Read more about it here. Big warning for sexual assault of a minor (by an adult villain) in volume 12. Has an anime covering early material.
#yuri#yuri recs#pride month#pride 2024#pride#manga#bloom into you#goodbye my rose garden#doughnuts under a crescent moon#yuri is my job#shwd#how do we relationship#run away with me girl#the guy she was interested in wasn't a guy at all#kiss and white lily for my dearest girl#aoi hana#kase san#the two of them are pretty much like this#I married my female friend#she loves to cook and she loves to eat#my recs
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hey love, could you please write a eminem x female reader where it takes place in 2001, just a few months after he and kim got divorced. the reader is a victoria secret model (she is like 24) and she and eminem start casually hooking up. it wasn't supposed to be anything serious since they both weren't looking for it. after a while, they start developing feelings but neither of them says anything about it. then the reader finds out she is pregnant with his baby, which obviously changes everything. when she first tells him she is pregnant, he doesn't believe it's his, saying she must have go around or something and it's leads to a fight.
2000s Eminem x Victoria secrets model!reader
caution:sexual content<3
The bar was alive with pulsing energy, music blaring and bodies moving. Marshall leaned against the counter, half-hidden beneath the brim of his cap, jaw tight. He wasn’t in the mood for small talk or smiles tonight, but being here was better than being stuck alone with his thoughts.
He took a slow sip of his drink, eyes scanning the room without interest—until they landed on her. You. You were perched at the far end of the bar, effortlessly magnetic. Your laughter carried through the noise, your smile lighting up the dim space. He tried to look away, but when your eyes met his, a challenge sparked between you.
You cocked your head slightly, amused by his attention. Deciding not to waste a moment, you sauntered over, weaving through the crowd like you owned the place. You stopped in front of him, the faintest smirk playing on your lips.
“Enjoying the view?” you teased.
He leaned back, raising an eyebrow. “You always fish for compliments, or just when it’s this easy?”
You blinked, momentarily thrown off. His tone was sharp, but there was a hint of a smile lurking beneath the surface. Intrigued, you crossed your arms. “Not my fault you’re staring.”
“Yeah?” He took another sip, eyes never leaving yours. “Must be my lucky night.”
You laughed, a low, genuine sound. “Is that your idea of flirting? No wonder you’re standing here alone.”
“Oh, I’m not alone.” He gestured vaguely at the crowd. “I’ve got all these people I don’t care about to keep me company.”
“Charming.” You rolled your eyes but didn’t move away. Something about his attitude was infuriating and intriguing all at once. “So, what’s your excuse tonight?”
“For what? Brooding in the corner?” He tilted his head, a flash of something darker crossing his eyes. “Maybe I like it here. Low expectations, fake smiles. Suits me.”
You studied him for a moment, catching the bitterness beneath the bravado. “You really do like pushing people away, don’t you?”
“Only when they get too close,” he shot back, but there was a glimmer of intrigue in his eyes. He leaned in, voice dropping. “Why? Planning to get close?”
“Depends,” you said, matching his intensity. “You gonna keep being an ass, or are you capable of real conversation?”
He chuckled, a mix of surprise and amusement. “You got guts, I’ll give you that.” For a moment, the mask slipped, and something genuine shone through. “What’s a model doing in a place like this anyway?”
“Looking for a real night.” Your gaze didn’t waver. “Not that you care.”
“Maybe I do.” He set his drink down and stepped closer, the space between you shrinking. His voice softened, but there was a rough edge to it. “Or maybe you’re just another pretty face looking for a story.”
“Maybe.” You smiled, defiant. “And maybe you’re just another angry guy with a chip on his shoulder.”
He paused, then nodded, an almost imperceptible smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Touché.”
For a beat, neither of you spoke, tension crackling in the air. Then he broke it. “You wanna get outta here?”
“Is that your idea of an invitation?” you asked, arching an eyebrow.
“Take it or leave it,” he replied, already turning toward the door.
You followed, heart pounding. Whatever this was, it wasn’t ordinary—and that’s exactly what you both needed. No promises, no strings—just two people escaping for a night.
Marshall led you through the back door into the cool night air, the music’s pulse fading into the distance. His house was a short walk away, nestled between the shadows of the city’s skyscrapers. The silence between you was charged, a dance of anticipation that neither of you had the will to break.
Inside, the space was surprisingly neat, a stark contrast to the chaos of the bar. The only light came from a flickering neon sign in the window, casting an eerie glow on his face. You kicked off your heels, the click-clack of them hitting the floor echoing in the quiet. He offered you a seat on the couch, the leather cool against your bare legs.
Marshall took his time getting you a drink, the clink of ice and the soft splash of whiskey punctuating the silence. He handed it to you without looking, his gaze lingering on the way your fingers wrapped around the glass. You took a sip, the fiery liquid doing little to soothe the storm brewing in your stomach.
You set the drink down and met his gaze, the air thick with something unspoken. In a single fluid motion, he closed the gap between you, his hands sliding around your waist, pulling you into him. Your breath hitched, your heart racing as his eyes searched yours for permission. You didn’t need to say a word—your body spoke for you.
Marshall’s lips found yours in a kiss that was as intense as it was unexpected, his touch gentle yet demanding. The taste of whiskey lingered on his tongue as you explored the contours of his mouth, the roughness of his stubble against your skin. You wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling the tension in his muscles, the rapid beat of his heart.
Without breaking the kiss, he lifted you off the couch and carried you to his bedroom, the world outside fading away as the door clicked shut behind you. The room was simple, the bed unmade—a stark reflection of his tumultuous mind. He set you down on the bed, and the softness of the mattress gave way beneath you, the smell of his cologne enveloping you as you fell back.
"Marshall—" You breathed his name, but he silenced you with another kiss, his hands roaming over your body, learning every curve and contour.
"Don't talk," he murmured against your skin. "You're too good at it."
You giggled despite the heat of the moment, pushing him away playfully. "You're an ass, you know that?"
"But you like it." He smirked, his eyes dark and gleaming.
You rolled your eyes, but the truth was, you did. There was something about his brusque demeanor that was oddly refreshing. "Keep telling yourself that."
"I don't need to tell myself anything. Your body's doing all the talking for you." His hand traced the line of your jaw, then down your neck, sending shivers down your spine.
"Is that your usual pick-up line?" You teased, trying to keep your voice light despite the growing heaviness in your chest.
"Don't need lines." He leaned in, his breath hot on your ear. "Just the truth."
You felt a thrill at his words, a delicious blend of excitement and annoyance. "And what's that?"
He whispered, "That you want this as much as I do."
And it was true. The way he held you, the way his eyes searched yours—there was something raw and vulnerable in his touch that you hadn't expected. You reached up, your hands tangling in his hair, pulling him closer.
"Prove it," you whispered, your voice a challenge.
Marshall's expression grew more intense, his eyes searching yours. He kissed you again, deeper this time, his hand sliding up your thigh, his thumb tracing circles that made you gasp into his mouth. You could feel the tension in his body, the need, the hunger—and it mirrored your own.
"I'm not playing games," he growled, his teeth grazing your lower lip.
"Neither am I." You met his gaze, unflinching. "But if you want this, you can't just take. You've got to give, too."
He paused, his hand stilling. For a moment, you saw a flicker of doubt in his eyes, but then he leaned back, his fingers tracing your cheek. "Fine," he said, his voice a gruff whisper. "But don't say I didn't warn you."
The next kiss was softer, more tender. He broke it to peel away your dress, revealing the lacy lingerie beneath. "Beautiful," he murmured, his eyes dark with appreciation.
You didn’t bother with his shirt. Instead, you slid your hands under the fabric, feeling the heat of his body and the ripple of his muscles. He groaned, the sound sending a thrill through you, urging you on. You kissed him again, his tongue dancing with yours, as you both fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. When it finally fell open, you ran your hands over his chest, feeling the beat of his heart, the rise and fall of his chest with every breath he took.
Marshall’s hands moved to the back of your bra, deftly unhooking it. He broke the kiss to pull the straps down your arms, leaving your breasts exposed to the cool air. He took one in his hand, his thumb brushing over the peak. You gasped, arching into his touch.
"You're perfect," he murmured, his eyes raking over you.
The words were simple, but the way he said them, like he truly meant them, made your stomach flip. You didn’t feel perfect, not after the day you’d had, but here, with him, you felt alive. You reached down to unbuckle his belt, the sound echoing through the quiet room. He watched you, his eyes never leaving yours, as you unzipped his jeans and slid them down his hips.
He was already hard, the evidence of his desire for you straining against his boxers. You reached down to touch him, feeling the heat and the power of him in your hand. He groaned, his eyes closing for a moment before snapping open again, a silent demand in them.
"Take them off," he said, his voice low and rough.
You smirked, enjoying the power you had over him, and slid his boxers down. He stepped out of them, his erection springing free. You took him in your hand again, stroking gently. He hissed, his eyes going half-lidded with pleasure.
"You're sure you want this?" he asked, his voice thick with desire.
"More than I've ever been," you assured him.
Marshall leaned in to kiss you again, his hand moving between your legs, finding you wet and ready. He stroked you through the fabric of your panties, the pressure building. You moaned into his mouth, your hips rocking against his hand.
You pulled away, panting. "Take these off," you demanded, hooking your thumbs into the waistband.
He smirked, enjoying your urgency. He slid your panties down, taking his time to kiss and nip at your thighs as he did. You kicked them off, eager to feel his bare skin against yours.
Marshall hovered over you, his eyes searching yours one last time. He positioned himself at your entrance, his hand still on your cheek, his thumb stroking your skin. You nodded, your eyes never leaving his.
He pushed into you, slow and steady, filling you completely. You gasped, your nails digging into his back. He paused, giving you a moment to adjust to his size, then began to move, his strokes long and deep.
You wrapped your legs around him, urging him deeper, your hips rising to meet each thrust. The pleasure was intense, a crescendo building inside you. He kissed your neck, his teeth scraping gently against your skin, his breath hot in your ear as he whispered, "You feel so good."
You moaned in response, the words lost in the symphony of sensations. Your hands roamed his back, your nails scoring his skin, urging him on.
Marshall’s pace quickened, his breathing ragged. You could feel him getting closer, his muscles tensing. "Come for me," he murmured.
And you did, the orgasm hitting you like a wave, crashing over you and pulling him under with you. He followed, his body tensing before he released with a guttural groan.
After, he collapsed on top of you, both of you panting and sweaty. The room was still, the only sound the distant hum of the city outside. You stared up at the ceiling, trying to catch your breath.
"You okay?" he asked after a moment, his voice gruff with satisfaction.
You nodded, still trying to catch your breath. "Yeah."
Marshall rolled onto his side, taking you with him so you were both lying face-to-face. His hand trailed down your spine, coming to rest on the curve of your ass. He squeezed gently, and you felt a new thrill run through you.
"Ready for round two?" he asked, his voice a low rumble that you felt in your core.
This pattern became our routine for weeks. We’d hook up, share nights of raw intensity and fleeting vulnerability, only to pull away and go silent afterward. Neither of us reached out; neither of us tried to bridge the gap. It was easier that way, or so we told ourselves. The walls we built kept things uncomplicated, even if the distance stung more than either of us would admit.
Then, one morning, as you prepared for a photoshoot for Victoria’s Secret’s new lingerie collection, a wave of nausea hit you out of nowhere. You tried to shake it off, blaming it on nerves or exhaustion, but your body had other plans. Within minutes, you found yourself rushing to the nearest bathroom, retching until there was nothing left. The sickness didn’t stop there. You steadied yourself against the sink, splashing cold water on your face, willing the dizziness to pass, but the nausea kept clawing at you.
Your team knocked on the door, concerned, but you assured them it was just a bug—something you’d shake off in time for the shoot. Deep down, though, a knot of worry twisted in your stomach. This wasn’t like you. As you tried to gather yourself, your mind raced, unwilling to confront the possibility that lingered at the edges of your thoughts. The routine you and Marshall had built—the one that kept feelings at bay—suddenly felt fragile, as if everything was about to change.
Your team, noticing how pale and unsteady you were, decided to cut you some slack and let you leave the shoot early. They offered sympathetic smiles and reassurances as you gathered your things, insisting you take care of yourself. The drive home was a blur; you couldn’t shake the nausea or the gnawing feeling that something bigger was happening. Once you stepped inside your apartment, the quiet only amplified your racing thoughts.
After pacing the living room for what felt like an eternity, you finally made a decision. You slipped on a hoodie and sunglasses, heading to the nearest pharmacy. Every step felt heavier than the last. Back home, with the pregnancy test in your hand, you locked yourself in the bathroom. The minutes ticked by with excruciating slowness as you waited for the results, your heart pounding in your chest.
When the test finally showed positive, you stared at it, unblinking. The truth hit you like a punch to the gut—you were pregnant. And it wasn’t just anyone’s baby; it was Marshall Mathers’. You sank onto the edge of the bathtub, the implications crashing down on you. This wasn’t what either of you had planned. The casual hookups, the silent stretches of avoidance, the unspoken boundaries—it all seemed to shatter under the weight of this reality. Whatever happened next, everything was about to change.
You decided you needed clarity, so you booked an appointment with your doctor to confirm what you already knew in your heart. Sitting in the sterile, quiet office, you felt a mixture of nerves and dread. When the doctor confirmed you were a few weeks pregnant, it made everything real in a way that no test could. You were carrying Marshall’s baby. You spent the rest of the day processing the news, your mind racing with questions and fears. What would this mean for you? For him? For the strange, fragile connection you both shared?
As days passed, you wrestled with when—or even how—you would tell him. But the longer you waited, the heavier the secret felt. Finally, you decided it was time. That evening, you found yourself standing outside Marshall’s house, nerves taut. The air was chilly, and you wrapped your arms around yourself for warmth. For a long moment, you just stood there, staring at the door, memories of all your past encounters flashing through your mind. Would this be the end of whatever unspoken bond you had? Or the beginning of something neither of you were ready for?
Steeling yourself, you knocked on the door. Each second that passed without an answer felt like an eternity. Just as you were about to reconsider, the door swung open. Marshall stood there, eyes shadowed with curiosity—and something else you couldn’t quite place. He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, his usual guarded expression in place.
“Hey,” he said, the word heavy with unspoken questions.
“Hey,” you replied, your voice steady despite the storm of emotions inside. “We need to talk.”
Marshall stepped aside, his eyes narrowing as he took in your expression. Without a word, he led you inside, shutting the door firmly behind you. The air was thick with tension as he gestured toward the couch. You sat down, hands clasped tightly in your lap, feeling the weight of what you were about to say pressing down on your chest.
He stayed standing for a moment, studying you with a mix of impatience and concern. Finally, he moved to sit across from you, elbows resting on his knees, his gaze unrelenting. “Alright,” he said, his voice low and stern. “What’s this about?”
His reaction was instant, almost volcanic. “What?! You can’t be serious! This isn’t happening!” His voice rose, the familiar ferocity of the rapper spilling over, amplifying the tension in the room.
“I am serious, Marshall! I didn’t plan this—” you exclaimed, your heart racing.
“So, what, you think I’m just gonna believe you? You've been with other guys, right?” He paced the room, running a hand through his messy blond hair. “I can’t—no. This isn’t mine. It can’t be mine!”
You think I’m a whore?” your heart pounded as the hurt reverberated through your chest. “You’re the one who can’t commit to anything or anyone since Kim,” you shot back, the defensiveness bitter on your tongue.
“That's not fair! I'm not the one who’s out there in front of all those guys, flaunting myself in lingerie! What do you expect me to think?” he yelled, pacing the small space as if it would somehow help.
“I’m a model, Marshall! It’s my job! But that doesn’t mean I’m sleeping with every guy who looks my way,” you retorted, your own anger boiling over. You rose from your seat, your body instinctively wanting to challenge his accusations, but deep down, you felt the crack forming between you two.
“Then why the hell am I supposed to believe that this baby is mine?” he spat, his eyes narrowing. It was as if the atmosphere thickened with every accusatory word. “You think I don’t know what these kinds of girls do? You think I don’t see what guys have to say about you? Them drooling all over you!”
“Don’t you dare reduce me to a stereotype, Marshall!” you shouted back. “This isn’t about some random guys! I’ve spent months with you, not them! I thought we had something real, but clearly, it was just me!” The vulnerability you felt clashed against the fierce independence you’d cultivated, and the contrast was almost suffocating.
“Maybe you should have thought about that before playing house with me when you had God knows who else around you!” His words sliced through the air, leaving you stunned into silence. The pain of betrayal washed over you, mingling with the looming fear of the unknown.
The tension in the room was suffocating. You could feel it in every taut muscle, every word spoken through clenched teeth. Marshall’s disbelief had shifted into anger, and your patience was wearing thin. Neither of you seemed willing to back down, both too raw and vulnerable to soften the blows.
“So, that’s it?” Marshall spat, rising from the couch abruptly. “You just come in here, drop this on me, and expect me to what—roll over and be okay with it?”
“Of course not!” you shot back, standing too. “But I expected you to at least listen to me without jumping to the worst conclusions.”
“Yeah?” He laughed bitterly, a harsh, hollow sound. “And what am I supposed to think? You show up after weeks, out of nowhere, and tell me you’re pregnant—and I’m just supposed to take your word for it?”
You felt a sharp sting at his words, but you refused to back down. “You know damn well you’re the only one I’ve been with.”
“Do I?” He sneered, stepping closer, eyes blazing. “Or do you think I’m just some idiot who believes every word that comes out of your mouth?”
“Why are you doing this?” you demanded, voice cracking. “Why are you trying to push me away?”
“Maybe because this all feels like a setup!” he shouted, his voice echoing off the walls. “Like some sick game you’re playing!”
“Wow,” you whispered, blinking back tears. “I knew you were scared, but I didn’t think you’d go this far.”
“Don’t put this on me!” His anger flared, and his words came out harsher than he intended. “What, you think I’m supposed to just trust you? You’re a model—you’re used to attention, right? Maybe this is just another way to get it.”
You stared at him, stunned. “Do you even hear yourself right now? That’s not who I am, and you know it.”
He glared at you, the hurt in his eyes masked by cold fury. “Get out.”
“What?”
“I said, get out!” His voice dropped to a dangerous calm, but his words hit like a slap. “I don’t need this. I don’t need you. Go find someone else to play your games with.”
You stood frozen for a moment, disbelief and pain coursing through you. When you didn’t move, he took another step forward, voice dripping with venom. “What part of ‘get out’ didn’t you understand?”
“Fine,” you managed, choking back tears. “If this is how you want it…”
“Yeah, it is,” he said, turning his back to you. “Good luck with whatever story you’re trying to sell.”
With shaking hands, you grabbed your bag and walked to the door, your footsteps heavy. You paused, looking back one last time, hoping to see any sign of the man you thought you knew beneath the rage. But he refused to turn around, his shoulders rigid, a wall between you. Without another word, you walked out, the door closing behind you with a finality that echoed through the empty house.
You arrived at your house late that night, the driveway long and quiet, the grand, empty space feeling cold and foreign. The house was large—too large for one person, too empty without the laughter and conversation you once imagined filling its walls. You barely noticed the soft glow of the lights as you passed through the foyer, your mind consumed with the events of the evening. Marshall’s angry words echoed relentlessly in your mind as you climbed the staircase, your legs heavy, each step feeling like a small betrayal to your own body.
Once in your bedroom, you sank onto the edge of the bed, tears spilling down your face before you even knew what was happening. You tried to steady your breath, but it felt impossible. The pain of it all—the heartbreak, the confusion, the loneliness—was suffocating. Your mind kept replaying his words: *“Get out.”* His cold dismissal. The way he'd accused you, as if you were nothing more than a liar trying to trap him. You hugged your knees to your chest, curling into the quiet darkness of your room, wishing you could make it all go away.
The house, once so full of potential, felt enormous and alien now. Every empty hallway seemed to stretch farther than it should, and the silence was almost deafening. You should’ve been used to it—this house was a reminder of everything you’d worked for, everything you’d built—but tonight, it felt like a cage.
You moved through the spaces, your footsteps echoing through the empty halls. The grand living room with its towering windows, the kitchen with its marble countertops, the sleek, sterile bedrooms you’d never truly filled with warmth—none of it mattered now. You weren’t supposed to be here alone. The thought of raising a child, of carrying this responsibility by yourself, felt like too much. The realization hit hard: You were pregnant. And, somehow, you were going to have to face this alone. The weight of it pressed against your chest, stealing the air from your lungs.
Sitting by the large windows in the living room, you stared out at the dark expanse of the yard. The lights from the city flickered in the distance, but all you could focus on was the reflection of yourself in the glass—small, fragile, and lost. How had everything gotten so complicated? How had something that should’ve been beautiful become a mess of hurt and confusion?
You placed a hand over your stomach, the warmth of your palm the only comfort you had. There was a life growing inside you—his life, your life, their life. But it was yours to protect, and in that moment, as you whispered softly to the quiet house, you realized something: You might be alone in this, but you weren’t giving up.
“I’ll take care of you,” you murmured, the words soft and shaky. “I’ll figure this out. Even if it means doing it on my own.”
The silence in the house lingered, but it wasn’t as suffocating now. You had made a promise—to yourself and to the little one growing inside. Whatever this journey held, you would walk it, even if you had to walk it alone.
Months passed, and as time went on, your pregnancy became impossible to hide. Your belly grew rounder, each day a visible reminder of the life—and turmoil—inside you. The once casual glances of curious strangers transformed into pointed stares, whispers trailing behind you wherever you went. Every time you appeared in public, whether for work commitments or just living your life, the attention was unavoidable.
Interviewers asked about the father with veiled curiosity and prying persistence, hoping to dig up a story that wasn’t theirs to tell. You always deflected, keeping your answers vague, your composure as unwavering as you could manage. But behind the facade, their insinuations cut deep. The tabloids spun stories, headlines screaming speculation about your child’s paternity, painting you as a scandal, a figure of intrigue—and worse. The judgment was relentless, the whispering voices growing louder. To them, your silence was confirmation of every cruel assumption they made: that you were reckless, unworthy.
There were nights when the weight of it all bore down on you like a suffocating blanket. Alone in your large, quiet house, you would sit with your hands on your swollen belly, feeling the movement of life within you and reminding yourself why you endured it all. This wasn’t about anyone else; it was about you and your children. It was about giving them a life worth living, even if you had to stand against the tide of judgment alone.
The months rolled on, and your strength became something of a shield. By the time you reached the end of your pregnancy, you had learned to drown out the noise, to focus solely on what mattered. One quiet evening, under the soft glow of dimmed lights in a hospital room, all the fear, pain, and loneliness gave way to something indescribable. The cries of two newborns pierced the air, and suddenly, the world faded away.
They were perfect—tiny, fragile, and already so loved. Twin boys with the faintest tufts of hair and curious eyes that stole your breath the moment you held them. Tears streamed down your face as you cradled them, their warmth against your chest grounding you in a way nothing else ever had. In that moment, the noise of the outside world disappeared. None of the cruel whispers or speculation mattered anymore. This was your reality now—your beautiful sons, your purpose.
You whispered their names softly, pressing gentle kisses to their foreheads, promising to be everything they would ever need. You knew the road ahead would be difficult; you knew the questions wouldn’t stop. But as you held your boys close, you realized you were ready. Whatever it took, you would protect them, love them fiercely, and give them the life they deserved.
The relentless attention never seemed to let up. Since the birth of your sons, the media frenzy had only intensified. Interviewers clamored for a glimpse of the twins, desperate to capture the first exclusive photo. Paparazzi camped outside your house, their questions growing more invasive by the day. And at the heart of it all was the burning question they wouldn’t stop asking: “Who is the father?” You deflected, you ignored, but each passing day it became more exhausting. Every attempt to protect your sons felt like an uphill battle.
One afternoon, you were at home, cradling your boys against your chest as you nursed them. The room was peaceful, a soft light filtering through the curtains. For a few precious moments, the world fell away, leaving only you and your sons—their small hands grasping, their contented sighs a balm to your weary soul. But that peace shattered with a sudden knock at the door.
Startled, you carefully adjusted, making sure your babies were settled before wrapping yourself in a loose robe. Your heart pounded as you approached the door. Another journalist, perhaps? Another intrusion? You steeled yourself, ready to dismiss whoever it was. But when you opened the door, the words caught in your throat.
“Marshall?”
There he stood, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his jacket, his eyes shadowed and wary. Time seemed to freeze as you took in the sight of him. He looked older, wearier—like he had been fighting his own battles. You couldn’t tell if it had been minutes or seconds before he spoke, his voice low and uncertain.
You stepped back, crossing your arms tightly over your chest. The sight of him there, in the house you had built for yourself and your sons, sent a wave of conflicting emotions crashing through you. Anger, hurt, confusion—all of it boiled over.
“What are you even doing here, Marshall?” you demanded, your voice sharp and laced with bitterness. “Haven’t you done enough?”
He paused in the doorway, eyes flicking around as if trying to take it all in. “Nice to see you too,” he shot back, a hint of defensiveness in his tone. “I thought maybe you’d be a little more… I don’t know… civil?”
You laughed, a hollow, humorless sound. “Civil? Really? You think you can just show up here after months of nothing and expect civility?”
He shifted uncomfortably, jaw tightening. “I know I screwed up, alright? I’m not here to pretend I didn’t. But I needed to come. I needed to see you.”
“Oh, now you need to see me?” You scoffed, feeling the anger bubble up again. “Funny how that works. I was on my own through all of it, Marshall. Every sleepless night, every doctor’s appointment, every time the world wouldn’t stop asking me who the father was.”
His eyes darkened, and he took a step closer. “You think it was easy for me? You think I just walked away without—”
“Yes!” you snapped, cutting him off. “That’s exactly what you did. You left, Marshall. You called me a liar, a whore, and then you told me to get out. Do you have any idea what that did to me?”
He flinched, his expression hardening before it softened with something like guilt. “I know I messed up,” he said, his voice low. “I was angry, confused—”
“Spare me the excuses,” you interrupted, voice trembling. “You don’t get to show up now and act like saying ‘sorry’ will fix it.”
He ran a hand through his hair, frustration evident. “Damn it, I’m not here to play hero, okay? I’m here because I can’t stop thinking about it. About you. About…” His gaze dropped to your stomach, then back up to your eyes. “About them.”
You swallowed hard, the walls you’d built around yourself trembling. “Them?”
“Yeah.” He nodded, his voice softer now, almost hesitant. “The twins. My—our kids. I want… I need to see them.”
Silence hung between you, thick and heavy. Part of you wanted to shut the door in his face, to protect yourself and your boys from any more pain. But another part of you, the one that still remembered the good moments before everything fell apart, wondered if this was a chance you needed to take.
“They’re asleep,” you said, your voice quieter now, the anger giving way to exhaustion.
You led Marshall down the hallway, each step heavy with tension, until you reached the nursery. The room was warm and softly lit, with a serene quiet that only came when your boys were deeply asleep. You paused just inside the doorway, watching as Marshall took in the space—the cribs, the hand-stitched blankets, the tiny toys carefully arranged. His eyes softened, and for a moment, the hardened exterior you’d come to expect seemed to melt away.
You nodded toward the cribs, silently giving him permission. Marshall approached one of the sleeping babies cautiously, as if afraid to disturb the delicate peace. He hesitated for a moment, then reached down, gently cradling his son in his arms. The baby stirred slightly, but Marshall held him close, lifting him to rest on his shoulder with surprising tenderness. His large hands rubbed slow, soothing circles on the tiny back, and the baby settled again, nuzzling into the warmth of his father’s touch.He carefully kissed the baby’s head and layer it back down on the crib.
Marshall turned his gaze back to you, his eyes full of a mix of emotions—regret, hope, and something that felt dangerously close to longing. For a long moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of everything unsaid filling the silence. Then, slowly, he reached out and took your hands in his, his touch gentle but firm. He lifted them to his lips, pressing a tender kiss to each knuckle, his breath warm against your skin.
“I swear,” he murmured, his voice low but unwavering, “I’m not leaving again. I’m here for you. For them. No more running.”
The sincerity in his words made your throat tighten. You wanted to believe him—desperately. But the fear of being hurt again was a barrier you couldn’t ignore. He must have seen the hesitation in your eyes, because his grip on your hands tightened just a little, as if silently urging you to trust him. The room was quiet except for the soft breaths of your sleeping children, the world beyond these walls momentarily forgotten.
Marshall stepped closer, his movements unhurried, giving you every chance to pull away. When you didn’t, he lifted a hand and cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing softly against your skin. The touch sent a shiver down your spine, a mix of old memories and new possibilities. He leaned in, pausing just a breath away, his eyes searching yours for any sign of resistance. When he found none, he closed the distance, his lips meeting yours in a slow, tender kiss.
It wasn’t like before—rushed, fueled by passion without direction. This kiss was different. It was a quiet promise, a tentative step toward something you both knew would be complicated but worth fighting for. You kissed him back, allowing yourself to feel the warmth, the sincerity, even as your mind reminded you to stay cautious. When you finally pulled apart, his forehead rested gently against yours, both of you catching your breath.
“I’m not perfect,” he whispered, his voice raw. “But I want to try. For you. For them.”
You nodded slowly, your hands still entwined. “It won’t be easy.”
“I know,” he said, a hint of a sad smile touching his lips. “But I’m willing to do whatever it takes.”
In that moment, you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, things could be different. It was only a beginning, but it was a start. And for now, that was enough. <3
#eminem x reader#marshall mathers x reader#eminem#eminem imagine#marshall mathers imagine#marshall mathers#slim shady#famous!reader#model!reader
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wildfire (cs) | five.
—spotify playlist | series masterlist
—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.
—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader
—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut
—word count: 7k
—chapter content/warnings: cussing, mature language/sexually implied content, alcohol consumption and intoxication, drunk texts, mingi's plan is 100% nawttt working lol, mcdonalds for the drunchies!!, san opens up a bit about the whole iseul x yunho thing, making out, some lil neck kisses, sprinkle of dry humping, the talk happens 😀
"Last one!" Felix yells in the dining area of his shared apartment. You, Jiung, Felix, their roommates, Eunchae, Jurin and a bunch of other people decided to pre-game at the apartment before heading over to the bar for the 'welcome to the new quarter' happy hour event. You all take one last shot before heading out as a group, their building on campus being the closest to the downtown scene.
On the way over, there's groups on groups of students and other guests flowing through the streets— the loud roars and chatter echoing throughout the area. It's nice to see everyone excited for the event, keeping everyone in good spirits and in good morale for the quarter.
You cling onto Jiung as you find the alcohol quickly running through your system. Your cheeks feel hot; body all tingly, the world spinning a little more than usual. When you finally arrive to the bar, you flash your student badges and ID to the security before walking in. The music is blaring through the bar, the bass causing the walls to vibrate. The bar has enough space to accommodate all the heads walking in— a huge area to hang out, drink and vibe near the dj and bar on the main floor that opens up to the back patio. There's also a loft area for people to hang out at, a few arcade games lining the walls along with high tables and seats.
The group walks in, greeting a bunch of other friends and familiar faces as everyone settles at tables near the back patio; the air feeling nice amongst the stuffiness in the bar. Felix and Jiung start ordering a bunch of shareable appetizers, while you slip away to head to the bar and skim through the limited cocktail menu for tonight's happy hour event. You bounce along to the music while debating between two options, finally making your decision just as more people pour in and the crowd cheers at the song that comes blasting through the speakers. You turn to give the bartender your order, slipping him one of the free drink vouchers you were given at the door. Suddenly, Eunchae comes to your side, drunkly squealing and squeezing your arm.
"Girl, the party has officially started." You furrow your brows as she steps aside and nods towards the door. In walks in San, Chris, Jongho, Mingi, Yeosang and Namjoon. You could feel your heart beating against your chest, and you're not sure why. You could be a 'lil excited he's here even though you would never do anything so bold, so daring, in front of everyone else.
But, he's here. He'll see you, and you'll see him.
"I definitely wasn't expecting them to come."
"Why not?! You know how Namjoon is. He loves his social events." She smirks. "Time to show off the goods!" She squeezes your ass just as she places a quick order with the same bartender.
"Eunchae!" You squeal, grabbing your drink from the bartender after getting yourself together. "They'll do their own thing and we'll do our own thing. No goods need to be shown." You playfully tap the tip of her nose, making her giggle.
"I mean, I dunno. Eyes could always wander, ya know?"
"Let's not get our hopes up, shall we? I'm sure they don't wanna be around obnoxious loud ass drunk students right now. All thanks to Professor Kim for being a social butterfly!"
"Thanks to him indeed, or else this happy hour probably would've been a shitshow without them." She smirks and bites her bottom lip, grabbing her drink. She then grabs your hand to bring you back towards your friends while you sip on your drink. Jurin is already sipping on something, while eating away at some of the nachos placed in the center of the table.
"Got you guys some shots." Felix says, slipping them onto the surface of the table.
"Lix! We just—"
"Ah, ah, ah! I paid a hefty tip for these so drink up, my favorite ladies." He clinks his shot glass against yours, Jurin's and Eunchae's before you take the shot to the neck, wincing as soon as the liquid burns and travels down your throat. You all chase with your cocktails [def not the best idea], hurriedly trying to wash away the tequila aftertaste.
"Gross." Eunchae shakes her head, grabbing more nachos to snack on.
"Good gawd, have you ever seen a better group of professors?" Jurin says as you and the girlies scan the high tables pressed closer towards the wall on the main floor. Mingi, Yeosang, Jongho, San, Chris and Namjoon are now huddled around watching the crowd with glasses of beer sitting on the table, all in casual clothing.
A group of handsome intellectuals. We're here for it.
"Professor Bahng me so—" Eunchae says in your ear.
"Don't you dare finish that sentence!"
"The new professor wants her some Choi San." Jurin smirks as she drinks her cocktail, eyes still glued on their group. You shift your attention back to them, watching as Professor Cho talks to Professor Choi. She's a cutie, you can't even lie— she's got on a simple white tee, black flare jeans and boots on and it works well with her figure. She sticks herself right next to him, smiling and laughing as they continue to talk, joke around, whatever it is. Professor Song's got a shit-eating smirk on while he's sipping his beer, so it's pretty obvious he's trying to set them up. You don't know if it's the alcohol or if you're actually feeling disappointed for god knows why, but it sucks. It makes you pout a little when the reality settles, knowing Professor Choi should definitely be entertaining someone like Professor Cho;
Not you, a grad student.
So maybe all those subtle moments were just merely subtle moments. Maybe Professor Choi was just that charming, that enticing, that everybody experiences the same subtle moments as you. It was never meant to be a thing.
"That's Y/N's man, though."
"Excuse me, since when?" You look at Eunchae.
"Since he went all prince charming on you and saved you in the basement."
"Please, he had no other choice." You frown.
"He could've grabbed Sunwoo or a facilities person to come and fix that door knob at the same time, but he didn't." She puckers her lips. "I'm gonna say he's got the hots for you."
"Do you hear her?" You laugh and look at Jurin before your eyes are back to [subtly] scanning the high tables. San is deep in conversation with his people, but it's almost like a radar goes off for him because his eyes instantly meet yours. He doesn't necessarily break away, even as he sips his beer and listens to Namjoon entertain the table.
His eyes are on you.
He'll see you, and you'll see him.
The DJ starts playing a mix that causes the crowd to roar and get more hyped, your friends pulling you onto the dance floor. You carefully let them drag you along— your glass in one hand while you start to sing and bounce along to the song. Of course, your friends drag you right in San's view, and he's not complaining one bit. He continues to keep it subtle, though. Still engaging in conversation as much as possible, but he's not even gonna lie, his attention is elsewhere. He can barely even focus on Zara next to him.
"I didn't think you'd actually come tonight." She says, coming back to his side after grabbing a soda to sip on.
"Why not?" He pries his eyes off of you to shift to her. "Namjoon's a real stickler when it comes to these things. Wants us to be present at most student events to show face." She giggles and nods.
"I see that. Well, you do enjoy it, don't you?"
"I do. It's fun to see everyone enjoy themselves. Reminds me of the good times. Back in the days." She laughs.
"Okay, old man." She teases and he playfully rolls his eyes, now returning his attention back to you. You're dancing and singing along happily, even doing those cute little dance challenges with your friends and San has to prevent himself from smiling too big or keeping his obvious attention on you for too long. At this moment, Yunho and Iseul walk in, passing the high table with curt nods and short greetings, the two barely paying any attention to San and vice versa. San continues to sip his beer, pursing his lips as he hears Yunho and Iseul happily greeting the other professors next to them. It's probably the beer [most likely], but he finds himself getting a little more irritated than usual seeing them around. And Mingi might've realized first, except his plan to distract him isn't necessarily gonna work—
"Why don't you spend some alone time with her or something? You know, doesn't have to be much." Mingi adds nonchalantly as he sips on his beer and watches the crowd, coming around to his other side.
"I'm good." San looks at him before shaking his head. His eyes land back on you over the edge of his glass and he finds that you're looking, too. You're being a tease, especially with the way that mini dress hugs you perfectly. The way you move your body. The way you try so hard but equally not as hard to make sure he's paying attention.
He knows the game. He knows the way it goes.
And San finds his hunger for you growing by the minute. Ain't no way you're looking that good in front of him without having a clue what it does to him. You know damn well— very, very well.
He wishes he could do something about it, and you love every second of it. You subtly bite your lip before turning to face Eunchae, Felix, Jiung and Jurin, continuing to dance along to the Iamsu! track that's currently on rotation. The boys are snapping videos and photos, being the hype men they should for you and the girlies. San finds himself silently chuckling from time to time, hearing your screams and giggles just feet away.
"You couldn't be any more obvious." Jongho giggles as he comes to his free side, Mingi, Zara and Yeosang heading over to the back patio to play cornhole.
"It's just nice to see them having fun."
"Mhm." Jongho hums, sliding his glass onto the table. "Anyway, wanna go head to head on one of the arcade games?" Jongho points to the loft. San nods, setting his empty glass aside before following Jongho up the steps to play a few of the arcade games. On their way over, they engage in a few friendly conversations before going head-to-head in air hockey, basketball and skee ball. Eventually, you, Jurin and Eunchae also find your way upstairs having spent some time getting air in the back patio, loudly enjoying the arcade games just a few feet away from Jongho, San and now, Yeosang. Amidst all the fun you and your girls are having, you don't realize you almost crash [yet again] into your professor as you step back and cheer just when he's about to pass.
"Woah there." Professor Choi has his hand hovering near the small of your back.
"Woah— sorry. Hi." You look behind in a drunk haze, greeting your attractive professor as you try to create some space. "Hi Professor Choi."
"Hey. You good?" He smiles at you as you nod, cheeks hot from the alcohol, palms definitely clammy.
"Yeah, I think so."
"Yeah? Be safe for me."
"Mmkay. Only for you." You tilt your head to the side and San cocks a brow in amusement. He subtly bites his lip before nodding.
"That's all I want." He plays along, watching as you obviously become affected by the unexpected response. You maintain eye contact with him, giving him that innocent, angelic smile you always give him. "Have a good rest of your night, Y/N." He says near your ear before giving you a small smile and heading back down the steps.
"Jesus fucking christ." Jurin teases before giggling and tugging your hand, pulling you back towards the games. As the night continues on, you, Jurin and Eunchae continue to play the rest of the arcade games before heading back down to play the giant Jenga and cornhole in between dancing with the boys. Hours easily slip on by, and by the time it hits close to 11pm, you're being asked to take the drunk-tivities to another bar.
"We're about to bar hop. Coming along?" One of your classmates ask.
"Um no, I'm drunk enough and want my bed. Thank you!" Eunchae responds. You, Eunchae and Jurin continue to signal 'no' to the others in many variations, slowly splitting and walking off back towards campus. You realize you didn't get a chance to say bye to Felix, Jiung and the rest of the boys before you three slipped away, so you grab your phone and try to text him to at least let him know you're alive and well.
"Shit, I just realized we never tried to catch Jiung or Felix."
"I'm sure they're fine! They know we'll get home safely together."
"Let me text them really quickly."
you: thosee last shots were lethal and I'm still dRINK !! hope u guys bcarefl
you: becarfil
you: becareful!!!! fuck!!!
You continue to walk alongside of Eunchae and Jurin as you walk back to your apartments from the bar, clenching your phone in your hand while you wait for a text back from Jiung.
Ding.
"Jiung texted back!" You look at your phone and you swear, at this moment, all the alcohol might've drained from your system. To your horror, Jiung isn't the one texting you back.
prof. choi: doing okay there, y/n?
"FUCK!"
"What!" Eunchae yelps, surprised by your sudden reaction.
"Oh my fucking god! I accidentally texted Professor Choi, not Jiung!"
"Oh shit." She laughs loudly. "Girl, it's fine! That man knows how it is, he probably doesn't even care!"
"No, Eunchae! This is so bad! He's gonna kick me out of rotation—"
"He won't! He was at the bar, I'm sure he understands. Just apologize." Jurin laughs. "You're fine, babe! Professor Choi looks so laid back. He's probably the last person you even have to worry about."
"Ugh, my god." You whine. "How embarrassing." You hesitantly [but quickly] text back to apologize.
you: omg i'm so sorry, professor choi! that was ment for jsunf
you: meant for jiung*
you: ah, sorry!!
San laughs at the text come through, incredibly endeared by the way you're trying really hard to apologize though drunk. He honestly doesn't care; he knows how this goes, he's been here before. He's glad you can have fun in between working and studying hard.
prof. choi: no need to apologize, i know how it is! been there before. can you please let me know when you get home safely at least?
you: okay, i will.
You bite onto your bottom lip just as the three of you finally reach the King Residence Halls, still intoxicated but reaching the phase of sleepy drunk at this point.
"Okay ladies, I'm off to my humble abode. Get up there safely!" Jurin salutes as all of you walk into the main entrance, turning to her right to head down to her unit located here on the first floor. You and Eunchae wave before the both of you are retreating to your own studios for the night; feet hurting, body slowly breaking down, thirsty as hell for some water while you ride the elevator up to your places.
When you get back into the room, you quickly shower and get ready for bed. It's just about to hit close to midnight, and you know the bar hopping has barely reached its peak. You remember to finally text Jiung to be careful and to be safe, all while remembering to text Professor Choi back to let him know you made it home safely.
you: sorry, i got home safely a bit ago!
You set your phone aside as you plop onto your bed, somehow nervous for texting him a little later than usual. You do remember him and the rest of the professors were still lingering around when you, Eunchae and Jurin decided to head back. Maybe he was still there? Maybe he left and is already snuggled in his covers—
Ding.
prof. choi: good to know.
you: you're still awake?
You're not even sure why you were prompted to keep the conversation going, but something within you felt comfortable enough to do so.
prof. choi: i'm barely leaving the bar with the rest of the guys.
you: oh, i see. be safe!
prof. choi: will be. make sure you and your roommates get lots of water.
you: roommates? i live alone. lol but i definitely just chugged a bunch of water.
He doesn't respond after that text, and you wonder if he's driving or if he's just cutting the conversation there. You let out a small sigh, setting your phone aside to keep your hopes down and start settling in bed. Just as you pull the sheets back and prepare to hop in, your phone starts going off; vibrating on your nightstand and causing a loud rumble.
You were not expecting him to call you.
You take a moment before sliding right to answer his call, licking your lips and swallowing the lump that has formed in your throat.
"Hi." You shyly say.
"I'm sorry to call randomly. Just wanted to make sure you were okay."
"You don't have to apologize, it wasn't random. But, I'm okay. Thank you, Professor Choi."
"San." He chuckles a bit.
"Hm?"
"You can call me San."
"Thank you, San." There's a slight pause that makes you feel like San is trying to say something, ask something in particular, especially since he called you instead of texting you back. But, part of you also feels like you could be looking too into the night and reading too much into every little detail.
Maybe it was more convenient for him, right?
He was eyeing you at the bar, though. Heavy. And San knows it. He wanted you to know it.
"Are you tired?" You ask softly as you sit up and sit criss-crossed on your bed.
"I was, but I think I'm a little more awake now. How are you feeling, still drunk?"
"Mm, not as drunk as I was after I found out I sent the text to you and not Jiung." He laughs. "Water is definitely helping, too. Are you okay to drive?"
"Yeah, I am. Only had that beer." Another small pause. "I'm gonna grab some food."
"Oh, but you aren't going to the other bars?"
"Jesus, no." San laughs. "They are, but not me. It took me a lot to come out tonight and it's only cause Namjoon wanted us to show face." You chuckle.
"I get it." You fiddle with the fabric of your sheets. "Do you.. want some company while you get food?" You boldly ask, heavily relying on the fact that San must have called you for a reason besides to check in. If worst comes to worst, he can just say no.
You'd understand. It's all harmless anyway.
"Sure." He says. "You're not too tired?"
"No."
"Where are you?" He asks softly.
"King Residence Halls. There's a side door on the left that I can meet you at."
"Be there in about 5 minutes?"
"Sounds good. I'll be down by then." And with that, the call ends and you sit on your bed for a good minute, trying to make sense of what just happened on the call. All of this was harmless, right? All the looks and the tension you had been feeling were harmless.
Right?
You hoped everyone was still busy being drunk or at the bar, knowing it'd def cause a stir seeing you get into Professor Choi's car. All of this on the surface level seemed so wrong and so out of place, yet here you were— throwing on some sweats and a hoodie to go on a ride with him. You grab your keys and your phone before heading down towards the side door. To your luck, the residence hall is the quietest it's been in awhile, and there aren't any people lingering around. By the time you walk through the door, there's an all black Toyota GR86 sitting idle. San lowers his passenger window just enough for you to see his eyes, a small smile on his face as you approach his car.
"Hi." He says as you plop in and awkwardly fiddle for the seatbelt.
"Hi Prof— San." You catch yourself [especially in these circumstances] as you settle into the seat and look at him. He lets out a small chuckle before driving off one-handed, his other arm resting on the middle console. "Where are you gonna get food?" Your eyes scan the way he's sat in the driver's seat; manspreading as he drives flawlessly with one hand. You can't help but find him incredibly attractive, and you shouldn't be fucking feeling this way.
It's the alcohol.
"Uh. That's a good question." His eyes dart to the time on his car's navigation screen. "McDonalds, probably."
"Great choice after drinking."
"Want anything?"
"I think I'm okay."
"You sure?"
"Maybe." He chuckles.
"Let me know. I got you." You look at him as you play around with your hoodie strings. "Thanks for coming along on the ride. How'd you know I wanted company?"
"I dunno, really. Just a feeling."
"You looked like you had a lot of fun earlier."
"I did. It was fun. I just wasn't down to walk to more bars."
"Your friends still over there?"
"The boys. Eunchae and Jurin are probably sound asleep in their apartments." San nods.
"It's good you guys came out. I always try to get people in the lab to come out to events and take a break from school and work."
"It is. It's easy to get yourself way too wrapped up in everything."
"Mhm. And that's why I try to push for a good balance. Don't want you guys to get burned out."
"Did you go out a lot while you were in school? During your postdoc?"
"Um, yeah. Kinda? I wouldn't do anything too crazy, though. I was also with Iseul for a lot of it."
"Oh." You look down at your lap. "Right, sorry."
"Don't be." He laughs. "I don't mind talking about it every now and then. It's not necessarily a secret."
"Mm, still. I didn't mean to pry."
"You didn't." He smiles, dimples on full show when he looks at you then turns back to the road. "But glad you enjoyed yourself. Saw you and your friends doing the little dances." You cover your face in embarrassment and it makes San laugh. "Why? It was cute."
"We were just drunk."
"And having fun!" He reassures you just as he turns onto the street and into the McDonald's lot. "It was nice to see."
"So, you were watching?" You look at him with a tiny smirk, hoping, praying to fucking God you weren't reading into everything incorrectly.
"How couldn't I?" He runs his finger down his bottom lip as he brakes and waits behind the car ahead. He shifts his eyes towards you, subtly eyeing you up and down from where he's sitting. You shake your head and look out the window without verbally responding, biting onto your bottom lip to prevent yourself from saying anything wrong. From smiling too big.
This shit can't be real.
"What's wrong?"
"Hm." You hum, tugging your hoodie up a bit. "You're just making me shy."
"Nothing to be shy about. I just liked watching you have fun. Should I not?"
"No, no one said you shouldn't." San chuckles, his turn to bite onto his bottom lip knowing full well where the rest of this can go. He's just not sure who will make the first move— you or him. Either way, he isn't complaining and he'll take what he gets. Call him selfish, but he thinks he deserves this after everything he's been through. He deserves to be happy, too.
"Sure you don't want anything?" He asks softly as he approaches the drive-thru speaker.
"Ice cream cone?" He nods.
"I got you." You sit quietly in the passenger's seat while he relays the order, pulling through to the last window as instructed. He pays and carefully hands you the ice cream cone before grabbing his small bag of food. You slowly eat away at your ice cream cone, preventing it from dripping all over the place while San drives off to a view nearby. It doesn't take long. In fact, you're just about to dive deep with your cone when San pulls off to a side lot and backs his car right near the edge of the small overlook he's at. There's better views, but this was the closest and it's a decent view— decent enough to help clear your mind, bring you back to reality and remind you of life's little blessings.
"Wanna hang out in the back for a bit? Let you eat that ice cream one in peace?" You chuckle and nod, watching as San hops out to open your door. You slowly walk towards his trunk, letting him clean it up a bit before plopping down to take a seat. You sit next to him, leaving a bit of room in between you two to make sure you don't make him uncomfortable.
"Do you come here a lot?"
"I used to, yeah. Helped me sit in peace for a bit when everything else around me felt too loud and chaotic." He says as he begins to eat away at his snack.
"It's pretty."
"It is, isn't it?"
"You don't come here anymore?"
"Only if I'm really stressed. Like lately, I guess." You smile a bit.
"You know, I would have never known you were stressing. I know you've got a busy schedule and a lot on your plate, but you never let it show."
"Years of practice." He smirks. "Trust me, it took a long time to get it under control. Probably one of the things Iseul couldn't stand about me." You eat away at the last bits of your ice cream before you look at the end of the cone in your hand.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Anything."
"How did you get past all of that?"
"Coming here." He laughs. "Nah, but Jongho, too. He's been there with me through everything. I honestly don't know if I'd be here, the way I am, without him."
"That's good that he's been there for you. I can tell you two are really close."
"Yeah. It took me a long time, too." San laughs. "Which goes to say, I had a lot to work on. When that whole thing happened, I was always angry and questioning everything, down to my friends cause of Yunho. I felt so.. low about myself despite everything else I had."
"Understandably so. It was only valid to feel that way after everything you've been through." You pop the end of the cone into your mouth and chew away, causing your cheek to puff out at the size of it. San smiles when he turns to look at you, also popping in the last bits of his sandwich before taking a huge swig of his water bottle to wash it down. "So. You and Yunho were friends?" You pretend to act like you don't know because you don't want San to think it's weird that you know some of the details before you even talked about it. It's his story to tell, anyway.
"He was uh, my bestfriend. Actually."
"Oh. I'm sorry, San."
"It's okay." He chuckles. "Promise. But uh, yeah. Maybe not gonna go down this lane tonight."
"That's okay. You don't need to." You look at him with those sweet, angelic eyes and he almost can't help himself. Well, he finds that he actually can't when his eyes fix on the ice cream at the corner of your lip.
"Wait." He says, taking his thumb to the corner of your lip, wiping off the small ice cream residue.
"Oops." You shyly giggle. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." He's doing the look again. He's doing that damn thing where he looks at you with his head slightly tilted to the side, a very tiny, subtle smirk at the corner of his lips. He's so fucking charming, so, so fucking attractive. He's so irresistible, especially when his eyes move from yours, down to your lips and back up to your eyes.
Maybe he's not the only one who can't help themselves.
Because the moment the silence feels a little different between you two, the moment the look feels a little more different, you find your lips crashing onto his in a quick, heated kiss. Everything about this moment is clouding your judgment, and you don't find yourself wanting to pull away. He takes the kiss, and he doesn't waste a moment of it. He feels his urge growing by the second, and feels the need to push this on and on;
And on.
He's wanted you, and he can't even tell you how relieved he is knowing you want him, too.
You straddle his lap and the kiss continues to intensify, becoming more heated and sloppier by the minute. He gives your waist a hard squeeze, a signal begging for you to slowly work your hips against him. Your tongue fights for dominance against his, San letting out a shaky sigh in between when you bite his bottom lip and suck on it.
"Fuck." He groans against your lips before devouring you some more, his hands slowly roaming up your sides. San sees how much your dress has ridden up, doing little to no justice hiding your beautiful thighs; barely covering your pretty parts. His left hand comes right below your breast, giving it a gentle squeeze to test the waters. You let out a small, breathy moan when he starts to leave a trail of kisses against your jaw, your neck. He starts to lick and nip at your favorite sweet spot, causing you to bite your lip and tilt your head back at the growing pleasure building at your core. You move your hips a little quicker, enjoying all of this and being in San's hold a little too much.
Until, the universe decides this is the right time to bring you back down to reality. A loud roar from a car zooming past on the hillside startles you, making you re-evaluate the compromising composition you're in with your professor.
"Oh shit, oh my god—I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get carried away like that." You abruptly pull back and hop off of his lap when the reality of what the fuck you're doing hits you.
"What, no? Y/N, it's fine. I—" He tries to reach for your hand but you back away. You're not sure what this means, or what the hell you've done— but you sure as hell just wanna get out of here and be in your own peace while you figure this out.
"God, I'm sorry, I really didn't mean it, San." You look at him and he can't help but knit his brows together in confusion. He wanted this, and he was so fucking happy to see things moving forward between you two; all he sees is fear, confusion and even a lace of guilt in your eyes, and he can't help but feel the same way, too. "Just got carried away, it should've never happened." You add.
"I— yeah." San lets it go, even though he's defeated. This is not what he wanted out of tonight. He didn't expect anything to happen whatsoever, but if it did, this is not how he wanted it to turn out.
This is not how he wanted tonight to end.
You don't really know when the embarrassment will die down, but it clearly hasn't on your end, and you've been avoiding San like the plague. It's not as hard as you thought it'd be, especially when San hadn't been around much due to his packed schedule and classes. The rare times you did see him, he was always with someone— bringing them down to his office for a meeting. You'd glance over and he'd quickly meet your eyes, but you'd break first and shuffle away to the behavior room.
Why on earth did you think it was okay to kiss him?
Him, a fucking professor. Let alone the professor you're currently rotating for.
How fucking reckless, Y/N.
Oh so reckless and careless.
—FLASHBACK
San doesn't get back into the car as fast as you do.
He actually lingers outside a little longer, cursing to himself. Hoping this didn't fuck up anything that could have possibility built between you two. Hoping this didn't fuck up anything that could have continued to grow, blossom.
When he finally gets back into the car, it's silent. But, it's an awkward silence. You aren't sure what to say to break the silence, and you aren't even sure what the proper thing to say is. You just know that you can't wait to be home, covering your entire body under the sheets— no longer having to face the world for the night.
"Cold?"
"I'm okay." He leaves it at that. The music is softly playing in the car, thankfully filling some of the void, the awkwardness. You scroll through your phone for the remainder of the ride, texting the boys back as you peep the pictures they sent from bar hopping, telling them to get home safely.
Hopefully, you don't run into them. That'll be a whole other beast to tackle right now, and you almost feel queasy thinking about it.
"You can just pull up there and I can walk." You tell him as he pulls into the familiar grounds of campus, the graduate residence halls passing you by.
"But, it's late. It's not safe—"
"San, it's fine. I've done this walk a million times because of the boys."
"There are no boys to walk you back, though."
"It's fine. I promise." He lets out a sigh. You unbuckle your seatbelt before giving him one last, shy look over your shoulder. "Thanks for the ice cream and for letting me tag along."
"Course." He says, letting out yet another disappointed breath as he watches you hurriedly climb out and rush down the street towards your building. He doesn't pull away, slightly drives up to make sure you do make it to your building and are safe inside. He lets out another 'fuck' before driving off to his house, afraid and slightly upset at how things turned out. Not out of selfishness, no. But, San finds himself caring about you more than expected.
He didn't want to let you go, and he's hoping he doesn't have to.
—END
You think you're saved, for the most part, until you receive a text from San on a random Wednesday afternoon. You've just gotten back from having a late lunch with your friends, making your way down to the basement to finish up your work for the rest of the afternoon.
san: can you come to my office?
You don't respond right away, and it's almost like San knew you were staring at your phone, waiting for the right time to text him back.
san: please? it's important.
you: i'm heading down to the basement, i'll be there in about 5 minutes. is that okay?
san: more than okay.
You let out a sigh just as you tuck your phone away, taking your steps a little slower than usual to buy yourself some time. When you finally get to the basement, you set your things down on your desk and slip your laptop out. You make your way to his office with your laptop and notebook pressed to your chest, giving his door a few soft knocks before you hear his 'come in' from the other side.
"Hey." He says, meeting you right by the door. You hear him silently lock the door shut behind him before plopping onto his couch with a loud sigh.
"Hi."
"Can you come here?"
"San, we're in your office—" He chuckles and pulls you down onto the couch next to him.
"I know. Door is locked. Don't worry." You let out a sigh with a small pout and he finds it adorable. "Y/N, I promise it's fine." You ease a little feeling his arm pressed against yours, body heat providing some kind of comfort.
"So, what did you wanna talk about?"
"Why have you been avoiding me?"
"Who said I was?" He cocks his head to the side before giving you a little smirk.
"You don't think I can pick up on how different you've been acting?"
"Well, San. I don't know?" You shrug. "That whole thing that happened shouldn't have happened and I'm still trying to figure out how to move past it because—"
"Who says it shouldn't have happened?" It's your turn to give him a look. You pause and try to read his body language, but nothing about him is defensive. Hostile. Regretful.
None of the above.
"San." You call him, almost defeatedly. "You and I both know we shouldn't have done that. I'm rotating in your lab."
"I know, the surface of it is terrible. It's wrong by the university's code and policies. But, I'm asking you."
"Asking me what exactly?"
"Do you think it shouldn't have happened?" Well, no, you think. If you were being completely and utterly honest, you would say no. You would say you wanted it because you thought he felt the same. You would say you wanted him so badly; fuck the rules in the book! But, you don't say anything, and it's enough for San to know exactly what you wanted without you having to say it out loud. "Y/N." He says softly before lifting your chin with his free hand. You don't even realize you've been playing with his other hand, fingers softly intertwining with his as you ponder on the question. "Have dinner with me. Let me take you out on a date."
"San." You slightly frown. Not because of him, but because of the entire situation as a whole. It's still all so much and so, so confusing. You've never had to navigate through treacherous waters like this.
"What's wrong, hm? You can tell me anything, remember?"
"I'm just scared."
"About what?"
"This, whatever this is. I don't even know what to call it, we shouldn't even be doing this. If anyone finds out, it could ruin you. It could ruin everything you've worked so hard for." He shakes his head.
"This is not gonna ruin anything. I—" He pauses, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "I want you, Y/N. I wanna explore this with you. It's been confusing and it's been difficult to navigate my feelings because I didn't know if you felt the same, but the other night—" He lets out a small breath. "You really do make me feel some type of way that no one else does. I haven't been able to get my mind off of it." His eyes roam your features. "Off of you." You sit next to him silently, trying to debate between right and wrong, between yes and no, between needs and wants; still, your answer comes to San. Even if it is terrifying. "Let me take you to dinner. Or not, it's up to you. But, I wanna at least show you I mean it."
"Can I think about this?" You keep your eyes on him, still a bit anxious and scared about all of this blowing up in your faces. It was so risky, so dangerous, so.. thrilling. Because Choi San is asking you to dinner. He wants your attention, and he wants to take you out. How in the hell did you get here weeks after the quarter just started?
"Of course you can."
"If I go, I should probably drive this once, though. I just don't want anyone catching on." And this was probably helping you relieve the pressure of going on this date with him; you wouldn't have to be tied down from the car ride, to dinner— to your trek back home. It's not that you didn't want to either, but it seemed safer this way. It seemed less stressful this way. You could give yourself some breathing room in between the dinner itself.
Because these were treacherous waters.
"Are you sure? We can always meet somewhere else."
"San. There's eyes everywhere on campus and nearby, you know that."
"But, I did plan to pick you up and drive you, do all the work for you so you don't have to lift a finger." He pouts a bit and you giggle.
"And I love that. Thank you. I'm just trying to figure out how to keep a good balance for us right now. I'll think about it, okay?" He sighs and nods in slight defeat because as much as he wants to spoil you right away, you do have to be careful about your movements, actions. There are eyes everywhere on campus and people do question everything. Speaking from his own experience, word gets around quick.
He hates this. He knows he's putting you in a tough position, but god, he loves the way you make him feel. He feels giddy, like a lovesick teenage boy who is chasing after his long-time crush. He feels things when he sees you, feels his knees get a little weaker when he hears your laugh or sees you smile. He feels butterflies when you brush past him and give him that cute little subtle smirk. He feels the need to hold you close, to kiss you. Hold your hand and keep you safe. Wants to get to know every thing about you: your pet peeves, your hobbies, your family, what makes you happy. Do many, many other things to show you how attracted he is to you. How you make him feel.
He hasn't felt this in a long, long time— hasn't felt genuine happiness like this in a long, long time.
He deserves to be happy, too. Especially after thinking for so long that he wasn't cut to be happy, wasn't meant to feel genuine connections and real relationships after his marriage fell through the way it did.
But, you're here and he refuses to let you get away.
—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thespiffynerd @vixensss @santineez @nopension
#san fanfic#san series#choi san series#choi san fanfic#san#ateez#choi san#san x reader#choi san x reader#ateez fanfic#kpop imagines#kpop#san x y/n#choi san x y/n#san angst#san fluff#san smut#choi san fluff#choi san angst#choi san smut#hwaslayer: wildfire
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𝑻𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑲 𝑻𝑯𝑹𝑬𝑬 💿 — 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒂
jj maybank x fem!reader | fluff | (reader has hair, a fight, mentions of sex, kissing.)
masterlist.
︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶
JJ Maybank’s type was simple; girls that he never had to see again. It didn’t matter what colour hair they had, their height or personality, all he cared about was the sex and the lack of them the next morning. It was a running theme though that the majority of the girls he went for were Pogues, loud, reckless and naughty.
He was a man whore, all his friends loved to tease him about it but in reality it was deeper than that. It wasn’t that he’d never thought about falling in love like they did in the movies Sarah watched, it was the fear he felt when he’d think of that. The idea of being stuck with someone, giving them all of your trust when they could so easily walk away, he didn’t like the thought.
Not to mention, he’s not the ideal boyfriend. He’s been locked up more times than he could count, he smoked weed like he was drinking water and he was easily angered which always ended with his fist in another man’s face.
He didn’t want to be at the bar alone, but non of his friends would go with him. John B and Sarah were staying in, Sarah couldn’t drink due to the pregnancy and John B felt bad to go out without her, Cleo and Pope were having a movie night and he didn’t feel like listening to them bicker about morality and shit, Kiara was on a date with her new girlfriend and he definitely wasn’t invited to that. So, that lead to him stepping into the bar by himself ready to drink himself to death.
JJ was a regular at the Tangled Line, a bar on the edge of the pier which he’d been going to since he was fifteen. He knew everyone in there, the regular old men that sit in the corner, the owners who should be divorced but aren’t and the staff. That’s why he’s shocked when he takes a seat at the sticky bar and comes face to face with you.
“What can I get for you?” Your voice is sweet but professional, something he doesn’t hear a lot in this kind of place.
You don’t look like you belong here, a ropey bar full of old men that are sure to spend their night shamelessly flirting with you. You look too sweet. Too good. You may be the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid his eyes on, and for the first time maybe ever he’s at a loss for words.
“Um, yeah, just a lager,” he mumbled, eyes stuck on the kind smile you shoot him as you turn to grab a glass to make his drink.
“Five dollars, please,” you request, placing the drink in front of him.
He rummages through his jean pockets to find the loose cash he’d grabbed from Pope’s wallet — Pope wouldn’t mind — and placed a few notes down. You put the cash in the register and went back to standing, no other customers around. It was nine pm on a Tuesday, so that wasn’t much of a surprise.
“So, what’s your name?” JJ asked, after taking a few sips of his drink. You looked over at him, as if checking he was talking to you. “I just haven’t seen you around here before.” You introduce yourself, giving him a shy smile. It was obvious you hadn’t expected him to take any notice of you, and that made his confidence grow. “You just moved here?”
“Yeah, uh, my nan lives here,” you explained. “She offered for me to come stay with her for a bit, see if I like the change.”
“And do you?” He smirked, sipping his drink once again.
“Haven’t decided yet,” you shrugged sheepishly, fiddling with a charm bracelet on your wrist. “It’s only been a couple weeks, and I haven’t had the chance to meet anyone yet.”
“Yeah, this place ain’t exactly huge with the young folk,” JJ responded.
You let out a giggle and it’s like music to his ears, he grins back at you. “I’ve noticed, yeah. You’re probably the first person in here that’s not over forty.”
“Maybe I just look really good for my age,” he smirked.
“Maybe,” you giggle again, before an older man comes over for a refill and you walk to the other side of the bar.
JJ can’t take his eyes off of you as you work, and when you notice your cheeks heat up with a pink tint. He’s not sure what’s wrong with him, he has an urge to jump over the bar and kiss your glossy lips until you’re putty in his hands. It’s not the same feeling he gets with hookups, though, with them it’s all lust for his own pleasure; he feels like he wants to put you in his pocket and never let you out.
“So, what made you want to make the change?” He carried on the conversation when you walked back over towards him, not giving you a chance to go too far away.
“Uh, I don’t know,” you shrugged. “My nana said I needed to let loose, stop being so uptight. My mom wasn’t happy with me moving but she agreed in the end.”
“Let loose, huh?” He smirked, downing the rest of his beer before leaning forward towards you. “What time do you get off?”
︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶
When you’d moved to the Outerbanks, you never expected to meet someone like JJ. Someone that actually paid so much attention to you that you usually felt yourself blushing, someone who lives life in such a peculiar way.
He lives with all of his friends, and he works for their own business in a building that they built. You figured he’d only pay attention to you for a couple days, he already had a life here, but it had been over a month and you were still waking up with texts from him.
“Havin’ fun?” Kiara sat next to you, a smirk on her lips as she took in the sight of you. She’s never seen someone go to a party and read, but there’s a first time for everything.
“Yeah,” you smiled, looking over at her. She gave you a look, as if to say really? You sighed, smile still on your face. “Parties aren’t really my kind of thing, but JJ wanted me to come.”
“It’ll probably take awhile to find him, he gets easily distracted,” Kie joked, making you giggle.
“I don’t mind waiting,” you shrugged, nodding to the book that laid open in your lap.
“It’s nice, seeing JJ like this. He isn’t normally one to keep girls around.” Kiara was clearly tipsy, ready to reveal every secret about JJ she could think of. You couldn’t help but furrow your brows, looking at her as she carried on speaking. “He seems to really like you.”
“You think so?” You asked softly, hopefully.
She nodded her head, giving you a drunken smile. “I hope it works out. You’re fun, for someone that sits and reads books at parties. And I think you’d be really good for him.”
Before you can ask her what she means, her girlfriend calls for her and she goes stumbling away. You look around until your eyes land on JJ, he’s already looking at you.
︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶
JJ had become a regular at the Tangled Line, not for the booze but for you. He’d sit at the bar and chat to you throughout your shift, and then he’d drive you back to your nana’s house afterwards. Tonight, he’d shown up and had a couple beers, which then turned into vodkas.
You only had an hour left, most of the time you were just wiping down the bar to give you something to do so you weren’t just staring at the clock. You were halfway through a conversation with JJ, giggling at one of his flirty jokes, when you got interrupted.
“Oi!” Your head swivelled at the sound of an annoyed voice, an older man who you’d served earlier on stood there. “Gonna do your fuckin’ job or what?”
“I’m sorry—” you went to apologise, but JJ beat you to it.
“Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” JJ was standing now, walking towards the man who had a scowl on his face.
“Not you,” he argued. “Get me a—”
“Nah, don’t talk to her. I’m talkin’ now,” JJ interrupted, once again. They were chest to chest now, and you were just watching with wide eyes. You’d never seen him like this, eyes narrowed and face red in anger. “Now, why don’t you try and ask nicely, huh? She don’t owe you shit.”
“It’s her damn job. Ain’t my fault she’s too busy whorin’ herself out to you to do her job—” he was cut off with JJ’s fist connecting with his cheek, sending her head to the side.
“JJ!” You exclaimed, covering your mouth in shock as the two of them started to fight.
JJ had the upper-hand the majority of the time, but the older man managed to get a few good hits in. By the time they were being dragged apart, JJ was spitting blood and the other was almost entirely unconscious.
“You need to get out of here!” You exclaimed to him, watching someone pull out their phone to call the cops.
“Fuck, no!” JJ argued.
“JJ,” you plead, trying to push him out the door.
“You comin’ with me?” He asked, looking down at you. His eye was starting to swell and blood stained his nose and lips.
“I’m gonna have to go grovel for my job—” you began to argue. He grabbed ahold of your waist, shaking his head.
“You hate this job. And I don’t want you workin’ here, servin’ other people that talk to you like that jackass. I’ll help you find another job, okay? I promise. Just come with me,” he begged.
You hesitated, looking back at where the man JJ had hit was slowly coming back to it, being held back by another man as he tried to get at JJ. You could see your boss coming out from the back, looking around in confusion. Your eyes landed on JJ, the determination in his eyes that he wasn’t going to leave without you.
“Fine, come on,” you sighed, ignoring the smirk that played on his bloody lips.
His fingers laced through yours and the two of you made a run for it out the building and down the road, he was chuckling but you didn’t find any of this amusing. You shoved at his arm once the two of you were far enough away.
“What?” He laughed.
“It’s not funny, JJ! You’re bleeding,” you argued, finally taking a proper look at the damage. He didn’t look that bad, once the blood was washed away there would probably only be a few bruises, but the sight still made your stomach churn.
“C’mon, baby, he deserved it,” JJ murmured, leaning down towards your face.
You sighed, pulling your hair from ponytail it was in to run your fingers through it. He reached for your waist, wrapping his arm around your back to hold you close to him.
“You’re an idiot,” you huffed, resting your face in his chest for a moment. “I can’t afford not to have a job.”
“We’ll get you a new one, one without old pricks who think they can talk to you like that,” JJ reassured, pressing a soothing kiss to your temple.
You wanted to shout at him, maybe even walk away and just go home. You’d never seen JJ like that before, John B had mentioned a few stories of JJ being in fights but you didn’t realise it could get that bad. You’d been a bit afraid at all the yelling and the blood splatters, but you couldn’t help the smugness you felt; he’d fought for you.
︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶
As promised, JJ got you a new job at the Wreck where Kiara and her family worked. He’d had to beg her to do him this favour, but luckily for both him and you, Kiara had become fond of you and she didn’t hate the idea of working with you.
You were locking up the restaurant, it was your turn to stay late and lock up, when you stepped outside you were met with a familiar camper-van and an even more familiar blonde leaning against it.
“I thought John B banned you from borrowing the Twinkie?” You teased, walking towards him.
He smirked back at you, shaking his head. “Sarah was bein’ sick so he was too busy to notice me take the keys.”
“Naughty,” you giggled, letting him open the passenger door for you. “I didn’t know you were pickin’ me up.”
“You haven’t got plans, right?” He checked, ignoring your statement.
You shook your head and he grinned, closing your door before jogging around to get in the drivers seat. You asked countless times where you were going, but each time he’d just give your knee a squeeze and turn the radio up higher. He pulled up at the beach, but an area you hadn’t seen before. It was secluded behind some rocks, just a small area of sand and the sea.
“What’s this?” You asked as he helped you step over the rocks.
“It’s my place,” he shrugged, sitting down on the sand. You sat next to him and his arm gravitated to wrap around your waist, a gentle kiss pressed to your cheek. “I— I wanna talk to you, ‘bout somethin’, guess I’ve been too afraid to do it.”
“Afraid? Of what?” You looked at him worriedly, resting your hand on his bicep comfortingly.
He gulped, giving you an anxious smile. “Y’don’t know much about how I was before you moved here, don’t really like talkin’ about it. I don’t want you to think of me like that, how everyone else does.”
“What do you mean, Jayj?” You asked gently.
“I’m not a good guy,” he murmured, looking out to the ocean. “And I don’t mean that in a self-pity way, it’s just a fact, y’know? I sleep with loads of girls and never call them back, I get in fights and end up locked up, literally every cop on this damn island knows me by name.”
“Really?” You didn’t sound judgmental, just surprised, and that’s what gave him the strength to keep going.
“My old man’s not a good guy either, guess I just grew up thinkin’ all this shit was right and now I’m older I know it’s not, but I could never get out of the habit of treatin’ everyone like shit. But then… well, then you came along,” he explained, voice softening at the end as he turned to look at you.
“Me?” It had been impossible to work out what you and JJ were. He flirted, sure, he’d hold your hand and kiss your forehead and beg for you to hangout with him, but he hadn’t outright said how he felt. You knew how you felt, though. You knew that whenever his eyes met yours your stomach would flutter, you knew that your waist would burn from his touch and you’d stay up late thinking of him when you couldn’t sleep.
“Yeah, baby, you,” he confirmed, a teasing tone. “I ain’t ever had proper feelings for a girl, guess that’s why it’s taken me so damn long to admit it to you.”
“Still haven’t,” you beamed, cheeks flushed and eyes excited.
He chuckled, turning his full body to face you. His hands cupped your cheeks and he leant forward so your breath was mingling with his. “I love you.” Your eyes widened, you hadn’t been expecting that. “That okay?”
“Yeah, definitely okay,” you whispered back. “I love you, too.”
He leant in and his lips touched yours, moving gently against your own. His hands were cold against your skin, but you never wanted him to let go. You brain went fuzzy and you pulled away slightly, breathing hard.
“You remind me of home,” you murmured softly, running your fingers through his hair.
“You are home.”
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