#i love to suffer ya feel me
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caughtshrimpin · 13 days ago
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wip hours
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hplonesomeart · 2 months ago
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Here you go fellow gays enjoy some tranquil scenery with the favorite fruity robot ever. Spend a late night chatting with him on a balcony as the laughter rings out in the air. Can’t quite get any better then this
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gxlden-angels · 3 months ago
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Shoutout to my therapist for now ending sessions with "We out here sinning! We out here suffering!" as a weirdly hopeful affirmation for me
#'We walk by faith and not by sight' is OUT#'We out here sinning and suffering' is IN#His whole thing is suffering sucks bootyass so we gotta learn how to tolerate it#You can express how much suffering sucks bootyass#and eventually you feel better. the sucking ass eventually runs out#you just gotta tolerate it in the least dangerous way you can#ideally it's have a cry and take care of yourself and rest up and so on and so forth#if it's self harm and drugs then so be it cause harm reduction#you probably aren't gonna focus on not smoking cigarettes if you're homeless and hungry#cause cigarettes make you feel less hungry and agitated#so once you get housing then we can worry about the smoking#you're probably not gonna stop self harming while in an abusive household so let's work on tolerating that while finding a way to get out#Once youre out and safe we can focus on moving from self harm to self care#ya know?#he says it's a tool. it's not the most handy tool but it is A Tool in your toolbox#you wanna add tools to your toolbox so you have more options. having no tools at all is the worst outcome#a broken hammer is better than no hammer when you need to deal with a nail right?#anyways that's it I just love my therapist I was homeless for like 2 months but I'm housed now so it's all good#he constantly reminds me of this concept but even more so until I got my temporary dorm#anyways again fuck Jesus I just moved into this dorm and I already might have to evacuate for Milton#you'll make my uncle a prophet but can't save my new mini fridge from a flood for me? fuck off dude#ex christian#religious trauma
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hungharrington · 2 years ago
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hi ..currently thinking abt writing this for my own but until I kick this writers block, i’m thinking maybe having a biting obsession with steve? like obviously not hard enough to hurt or leave a mark or anything, just being fixated on the idea of doing it as love language? it’s always at the most random times and always catches him off guard but he’s learned that’s just like affection overload for you so he doesn’t care and lets it happen !!!
YODELING anon you and me are ONE in the same!! and look like, you never think of yourself a biter or even consider yourself to be one, you get all the normal emotions when you gaze at your boyfriend— you want to kiss him, want to hold him n touch him and this feeling always feels like it comes left field. steve doesn't ask the first couple times, mainly because he's like :O..... did you just bite me? after you've gnawed on his finger for a moment, wrapped in his arms at a party together and you've just ducked your head and not said anything, clearly a bit embarrassed. and it just feels like an elephant is sitting on your chest, squishing out all your affection in every direction and you can't explain it to him— you're a little too embarrassed and also a little bit loves that he is surprised but doesn't tell you to stop :')
one time, you're just bundled up beside him in bed for an afternoon nap, legs tangled together, tucked into his chest but god you just want to give him a little nibble. you just love him so much. you check, pulling back an inch and glancing upwards and his eyes are shut, probably dozing sweetly so you just snuggle up him closer, arms squeezing around his middle as you sigh dreamily and try contain your affection. it won't do. his hand is on the pillow within reach and you plant a soft kiss on his palm, then just.. give it a little bite, in the pillowy bit of his palm— soft as you can. you don't even notice steve open one eye, spying your antics with a smile and he gives you a little fright when he speaks, "whatcha doing, honey?" and you shrink back, apologies falling off your tongue, "sorry- do you find it that weird? i can stop but-- it's not bad, i promise, i just, sometimes i just love you so much i feel like i can't contain it. guess it... comes out in the form of a bite?" and realisation breaks over steve so fondly, that you get the same surges as he does, that it's all love "s'okay," he whispers, tightening his hold with a smile, "if that's what it means, y'can bite me any time you wanna," and you do :) and steve loves it :)
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applecherry108 · 27 days ago
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My husband is so smart and kind, also I love that he’s just slowly conditioning the entire crew to come after him during WCI. “When a woman lies, a real man forgives her.” Yeah okay, you ain’t slick Mr. Princess. We all know you’ll be a fleeing damsel soon enough yourself.
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permanentreverie · 1 year ago
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so many classics i wanna tackle in 2024, my tbr is going to END me
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thesoupisburning · 11 months ago
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the prisoner
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago
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The annoying thing about releasing sanji from the cage inside my brain this week is that 1) I got stung by a wasp or yellowjacket on my dominant hand and it's so swollen there's tension when I grip a pencil and 2) I won't be around this weekend to draw him a million times in color 😭
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orcelito · 1 year ago
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read a fic earlier that's just like infiltrated my brain. i am thinking about it so fucking much. i keep remembering it and kicking my feet and giggling like an anime schoolgirl over some severely undernegotiated hardcore bdsm smut like MAN it was neither safe nor sane but it SURE WAS FUN.......................
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tittysuckersworld · 2 months ago
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vent tw, if you have depression please please just dont interact-
#ok so. to preface this for anyone with depression going past this point. im not gonna be nice. this isnt about you#this isnt about you in particular or how your secretly constantly a burden to everyone you love or how you just cant get it right#its not about having to deal with a person with depression but more how the social climate has made it so its so hard to deal with every#thing. thats all. if you read more do not blame me for feeling bad.#that was your only and last warning#okay so! now that hopefully all my homies with depression out there are ok- it is hard being surrounded by people with depression#sorry like. i am the only one in my imediate family without depression. and its. its hard a lot#like i care so much about these people and yet i cant help them because their either sad or tired or angry or numb most of the time#and i cant do anything. i cant do anything at all. and thats fucked!!!!! i think. sorry i am not one for curing mental illness but i really#really wish there was just a cure for depression so the people i care about could be happy and have energy and be ok#i dont want to constantly worry in the back of my head if what ill say next will lead them to going quiet and sad#or worry about how a few too many wrong moves and a hard time could push them off the edge. i know it wont happen.#but i worry about it constantly especially with the political climate#and i care for them so much and i just wish they could feel happy most of the time. just more than half is enough. more than half#gosh its gotten to the point a sertain tone of voice or someone saying their tired can make me feel bad#like bad enough i need to leave the room and go cry. everyone is alwase tired and i dont know what to do#i feel like a little kid being so sensitive by others emotions- but i cant help it. i cant help it when im surrounded#again this isnt a bash against anyone with depression. this is a bash against depression because of all the pain its given my loved ones#if i could fight depression as a just. thing i would mawl it alive. tooth and nail til all that was left was either bones. cartalige.#blood and flesh that hadent somehow made it into my stomach. and id keep it alive for a long as i could as i killed it#it would suffer 10 times the amount its made others suffer if i could. i can be a cruel bitch and i will if i ever got the chance.#and u h ya! sorry lil bit of silly moment i am just. sick of the tired. if i could id honestly never hear the phrase im tired again
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mayordeas-clone · 4 months ago
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whenever im looking for USTs for song covers i wanna do quick i've come to find three types
has all the words in the right places, untuned blank slate that (imo) did all the hard stuff for you and now you get to have fun tuning it yourself
an intricately tuned file that's pretty much plug-and-play (unless i feel like modifying it to be in english)
the most inexplicable and user-unfriendly setup ever that modifying it to be singable for your voicebank and language is a challenge to do on its own
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aria0fgold · 5 months ago
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google how to explode rats with my mind
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katsukikitten · 2 months ago
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Retired pro hero Bakugou buying a really old abandoned home in Japan and restoring it while living in it.
It's all he's got, a lot of his friends have wives, families, kids, some of them even expecting a first grandkid and Bakugou in his 40s has nothing of his life to show for aside from the undisputed number one spot on the hero charts for 20 years straight and more scars than he can count.
He feels he relates to the house, old, once adored but now empty.
He wants to change that, wants to be more than an idea or idol, wants to disassociate from Dynamight and just be Bakugou Katsuki but he isn't sure he knows who that is. Dynamight is still parts of him yes but exaggerated, in all his years Katsuki knows he can soften he just doesn't know where.
Although he's ready to find out. Sadly or maybe fortunately, he's the type of man who has to find out through action and hard work. He bought the house site unseen, didn't even Google what the front of the home looked like he didn't care.
Standing in front of his mostly dilapidated home he feels good, crossing his arms over his chest as he lets his mind wander on where to start. Eyes sharp, cutting into the features of the home as he assesses just like he would any villain situation.
"Excuse me Dyna-" You clear your throat before he looks at you, as you remember his retiring announcement of him saying Dynamight can go fuck himself. I'm Bakugou Katsuki now.
"Excuse me Bakugou. I brought you a little welcome gift. I'm your neighbor." You don't flinch when his heavy gaze flicks to you, don't shy away from his snarl and if anything your smile grows as you offer up the bento and plate of cookies.
He doesn't take them and you don't take offense, just gently pull them back to yourself as you look at the home
"I'm so happy you bought the Sato house. They were good neighbors. They lived here when I was younger by both passed suddenly. Old age does that ya know? They didn't have any children but Mrs. Sato taught me her special rice for bentos."
You're rambling but you don't care, you'd just bought your childhood home from your parents a month prior. Fearful your home would suffer the same fate as the Satos. That the love and memories would be washed away by the rain and neglect. That the air around the home would worsen each year it went unaccompanied until it became so stagnant with neglect it became a miasma that not even the toughest soul could stomach.
Yet here stood Bakugou strong and tall outside a broken home.
"I don't think it's anything special by the way. Just a bit more soy sauce or sesame seed oil, I think she was what made it special."
Katsuki looks down at you for a long time, sees your fingers twitch against the fabric of the neatly wrapped bento, watches you swallow thickly and lashes flutter to combat the burn in your eyes as you stare at the home. You turn to face him, give a polite smile and nod of your head in a brief good bye before his voice stops you.
"I'll be the judge of that." You furrow your brows in confusion, looking up at him before his big warm palm comes under the bento to lift from your hands, "If the rice is special or not."
He watches your face light up, a true genuine smile that could compete with the sun and he feels something deep in his chest ache. Feels it yearn to reach out to you but he stands firm in his spot as he watches you disappear down the short overgrown walk way back to your home.
He doesn't even need to try the fucking rice to know the answer.
The rice was going to be special because you made it, Katsuki's sure of it.
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gurorori · 1 year ago
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continuin the prev post here cuz i feel comfy hidin my talks in tags but i always near the tag limit
#as i was sayin#im really proud of myself 4 progressin in the way i have i think its a part of healin 4 me but also is jus way of expression#i still feel like a freak a lot but.. less than before#especially now dat i been findin more ppl who share my interests n views 🥺🫶🏼#it has genuinely helped so immensely#i love ppl who r jus. normal. n have realisitc views. naw black n white thinkin. naw extremes#n i have 2 say ppl gawta get more comfortable w jus.. sayin they don lik Smth#dat its outta their comfort zone dat it doesn float theit boat#instead of harrassin ppl n assignin morals 2 things dat never involved em. 2 things dat r far removed from reality & don affect it unless ya#let em affect it#like w how anti-prоshiр sum ppl r. ya wudn expect em 2 b so obsessed w clockin others n sendin hate. SAME for the other way round. leave#each other alone? peace n lovr on planet earth?#but yea im happy 2 jus b. b my own thing. n do my own thing#nevertheless i still believe thers a conversation 2b had abt the experiences of those whose trauma Do make em like fucked up related things#n gravitate towards those things n see it in eveyrthin n wanna re enact em in sum way#'healthy' (fiction. roleplay. kink) or 'unhealthy' (seekin out those things irl w real danger of harm)#like which one do ya think is better. hm?#cuz personally id rather let ppl do watever they want in their own time as long as they r unhurt & don hurt anyone else.#the moment ya assign morality 2 things like kink n fiction. ya other ppl who r not like ya & don deal w things like ya & WILL most likely#suffer w consequences (cause i have. self doubt & hate. guilt. alienation)#it can b a healthy outlet as long as ya r mindful. 100%#ill b upfront tho. it does strike me as weird when someone who has naw history of X is straight up obsessed w it in dat sense. but also like#they can do watever they want forever anyway. my personal feelings r irrelevant cuz okay. then their spaces r nawt 4 me!#like sadly im nawt livin the timeline where m unaffected by the trauma we have so i cant understan wat else is in sm1 head dat might make em#drawn 2 those things. but it also none of my business. so!
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sttoru · 1 year ago
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satoru loves loving you.
he loves taking care of you; giving you random gifts you don’t necessarily need; cooking you (half-burnt) food to make sure you eat at least a little something; hugging you when you least expect it, but need it most; reassuring you every time you’re anxious about something — even with the smallest of things that others would brush off and probably tell you ‘it’s fine’ or that ‘it isn’t that big of a deal’.
satoru also takes loving you quite seriously. he isn’t ashamed to admit how much he likes his lover nor does he care about what people think of you two as a couple. you’re the apple of his eyes; the love of his life. the only one who matters. therefore, it’s only natural for him to be a bit too. . . dramatic when it comes to showing you that he cares for you.
“satoru — love — i’m not dying. it’s just the flu.”
especially when you’re feeling under the weather: you’re sick? he’s double as sick.
“oh, my baby. my sweet, sweet babyyyy,” satoru sniffles as he cradles your tired body to his chest, his chin resting on top of your head. the devastation in his voice sounded like you were at war and had suffered a fatal gunshot to the chest.
it was nice to know that satoru truly cared that much about your wellbeing. also, kind of funny. it’s like he was (unintentionally) attempting to make you feel better about your situation — almost like he was trying to take your mind off the throbbing headache you were experiencing.
“sato—” “i know, i know—no need to talk. we’re gonna get ya fixed up, all right? hold on.”
your eyes followed satoru’s slender hands as they swiftly search the plastic bag he had bought home from the store a few minutes ago. he picks out a bottle which contains your usual painkillers and quickly takes out the recommended dose.
satoru pouts whilst grabbing a cup of water, though doesn’t directly hand you it over, “open up, princess. you’ll feel better after ya take this. trust me.”
all you can do is accept it. satoru’s going to baby you throughout your entire sickness, whether you liked it or not.
you part your lips and allow your lover to put the small pill on your tongue. he gently places the rim of the cup by your mouth and helps you swallow the medicine — praising you afterwards with a quick ‘that’s my girl’ — before helping you rest your head back on the pillow.
satoru does not allow you to move a single muscle when he’s around and you’re unwell. he insists to take care of you and to nurse you back to health — even if he has to skip on important meetings or missions. the entire world could be burning down and he’d still only think of your safety and health.
nothing in the world compares to you. no one and nothing ever will.
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backwzzds · 1 year ago
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ೃ⁀➷ spoil you, plug!eren
eren hated when you spent your own money, but you don’t listen.
thinking about the way plug!eren would take you on his drops with him. you were so quiet and in your own world, he never minded the fact that you had your freshly white painted toes resting against the dash of his mercedes AMG coupe. the entire car was blacked out with expensive ceramic tints, protecting you both from your usual…late night activities.
your glasses rested on the cute bridge of your nose as your left leg was sat in eren’s lap while your right rested against the dashboard. eren was lucky that he fucked with most of his customers heavy…you two had been waiting for the dude to meet y’all for nearly thirty minutes now, and had it been someone else, eren would have sped away long time ago.
eren comfortingly rubbed your baby soft feet in the grasp of his tattooed hand, one with beautiful realism art of your own eye. with a turn of his head, he could see you practically nose deep in the bright screen of your phone illuminating through the car. “you growing bored mama?” his voice is concerned. “ian think we was gonna be waiting this long on dude…my bad baby.”
you hadn’t said much since you’d gotten in the car, just wanting to hurry and add all of your things to your shopping cart on the skims website. “nah, ‘m just…trying…to do somethin’ real quick,” you bite your lip as you tap away on your phone. you were trying to add as many things to your cart before it was gone. “before this shit sell out.”
eren being the nosy boy he is leans against your shoulder to see what you were doing. but the moment he’d seen you type in numbers that belonged to what he knew as your own debit card, he kissed his teeth in annoyance. “man how many times i gotta tell you to stop using your card to go shopping bae?” you roll your eyes at his words. “i’m serious, you got all three of my cards on ya phone for a reason. fuck is you typing in your info for?”
don’t get him wrong, eren loved the fact that you were independent and knew how to handle money almost perfectly now that you were in your twenties. but being together with you for so long, he continued to step up with his provider capabilities by always taking care of you. whether it was paying your bills, rent—everything in between.
but of course it was a struggle when ms. i can do it all by myself meets mr. i know you can but let me do it for you
“because i’m spending like 600 dollars,” you point out to his previous question with an obvious scoff. “i’m not asking you for that.” eren mirrors your actions and rolls his eyes again.
eren looks at you as if you’re insane and suffered memory loss for the past four years you’ve been together. “babe…i make that shit in one night. actually—fuck a night—i make that shit in two hours!”
it wasn’t like he was lying either, with the way that eren was one of the only trusted plugs in town, it was very easy that he’d bring at least a band a night on a consistent basis. selling for almost six years was finally paying off.
you two hardly ever fought, but if you did, it was always about money. eren knew how long you’ve had to do things on your own physically and financially. you couldn’t go to your mom for help, you didn’t have a dad to beg, so it was all on you since you’d been 16. but now that he had eren, he’d just wish you’d let him take the burden of money of your shoulders and take care of you the way you take care of him.
after a few minutes, your boyfriend holds his hand out. you give him crazy eyes, but eventually follow orders by putting your phone in his hand. “don’t know how many times i gotta tell yo stubborn ass, forreal,” he grunted. “‘s never a problem spoiling my baby. you don’t ever ask me for nothing. let me feel useful and get you stuff, mama.”
with a sigh, you nod your head, like you always did. there was no way eren was gonna take no for an answer when it came to spoiling his wife.
in response, eren uses his free hand to delete your information and instead place the correct numbers—the information to his amex black card. all the money he has, he sits and does nothing with it, so why not buy you all the things you’ve never had before?
when you hear the chime of your phone confirming your order, eren hands you the phone back and goes to look out his dark window.
with your acrylics, you grab eren by the neck and slowly turn him back to face you. “thanks papa,” you gave him genuine eyes.
eren leans forward and pecks your lips. with a serious face, he pecks you one more time before wrapping his tatted fingers around your neck erotically. with a look in your eyes he tells you, “always tell me what you want, no matter how much, mama. you know daddy gonna get that shit for you one way or another, regardless.”
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