#i love psychology lmfao

[chicago-geniza]

The human psyche is a fickle thing (many more nominally Significant events have transpired, many more frost heaves have erupted along the paved road of my life, I've gotten a LOT sicker in unanticipated ways with unanticipated consequences, and yet, my agenda for next neuropsych appointment is still "feeling betrayed by [redacted] for acting like the pandemic is over even though she herself is disabled; abiding by communist principles in theory, and very often in practice! but when push comes to shove the most painful part of this weird relationship has been acknowledging & accepting your mom's tongue-in-cheek nickname for her (Bougie [redacted]). Also how she responded to the situation with [nemesis] (doubt, disbelief, asking if you were drunk, if you might have just made a bad decision & be regretting it in the light of day). How if not the former, at least the latter can be legitimately & not-irrationally felt as some flavor of betrayal. The former -- irrationally. And in the future, on this, the centennial of one time history ended during the period we call modernity. How do we move forward (singular-we). How do we make it hurt less.")

[nuks]

Taking a wee break from commissions to ponder the oc orb… kinda wanting to make just. The most mean lady ever… let’s be real we all need more mean girls who are just morally bad LMAOO waiter waiter, more villainous women!!! inspired by bubblegum bitch by marina and cheerleader by ashnikko

[sadquickchristmassnowman]

for my abnormal psych final my professor was like “write a case study on a person you make up, then analyze their thoughts, feelings, etc, in relation to the DSM-5, and give any potential diagnoses”

anyway I just wrote mine on Jeff Winger (I changed his name in the paper but it’s him) I wrote 1600 words in an hour and got 100%

[tmos-time]

HAPPY HALLOWED WEEN‼️‼️‼️‼️ Any spooky HCS for the end of October spirit?

ohhh SPOOKY headcanons? 🤔

how about this one; eridan and sollux have different styles of stress dream imagery

for sollux, its generally a state of decay; abandoned places with long grass and various states of animal carcases, decapitated snakes, zombies that try to bite him awake, the apocalypse -- stuff that brings in a feeling of the doomed

for eridan, its a little more complex; hiding defenceless in a changing room at the mall while half-life style aliens start to fire guns, getting lost while trying to get somewhere or time going by too quickly trying to get some sleep before the next day, people that he knows not acting quite right while staring too long and too intensely-- a wider array of things that *usually* bring in a feeling of helplessness

sometimes, ESPECIALLY post-sprite, the themes overlap a little lmao. when they get stress dreams, sollux just Wakes Up for the night if he gets one, eridan at least Tries to settle back down to sleep if he wakes up too early

[angsty-prompt-hole]

9 for the whumpy ask game for Haven?

--@ceph-the-ghost-writer

How do they do while recovering after rescue/escape?

Oh this one is fun. Haven is not good at moving on, and she is not good at accepting things, so usually she gets angry. It's really, really hard to get her to sit still and actually heal and deal with things, especially since she's immortal and her body basically does a hard reset in regards to physical trauma every single time she dies. In the end, she really doesn't deal with anything that happens to her, but she pretends she's over it, even though she very obviously isn't.

It's even harder to prevent her from taking bloody, bloody revenge on whoever hurt her. When she was younger, she would often just run away and avoid whoever hurt her for as long as she could, but as she grew older and her sanity fractured further, she got far more violent because of how badly she needed a sense of control. And what better way to regain control than through extremely violent murder?

[orcelito]

New way to kill someone in a dream. Literally ripping their soul out of their body and crushing it in my fingers??? Like ok

[jongins-gf]

I fucking LOATHE the proliferation of pop psychology in our current zeitgeist that has watered down the understanding and meaning of these actual psychological terms, leading to their misuse and abuse. I hate how these concepts are reduced to simplistic and contextless definitions that can be applied to almost every NORMAL human interaction, in cutesy and digestible, short social media posts (Instagram, Tiktok, Twitter), in trendy sayings, etc. I especially fucking hate how this shallow understanding lets people weaponize "therapy speech" to use against others to label them as "abusers" and to armchair diagnose them, also as another weapon. Beyond people using pop psychology as an excuse/weapon to be shitty to each other, it also enables abusers by giving them another tool in their arsenal to use and help them gaslight their victims! (And SO much of this misunderstanding stems from huge accounts: not just unqualified normies but also psychologists/therapists who should know better, but I digress.)

For other people like me who have been (falsely) accused of being abusive/an abuser and were feeling bad about it, this post helped me see SO much in understanding actual abuse:

And a lot of these bastardized definitions are ableist and centered around neurotypical societal norms' definition of what is "acceptable"...which leads to even more shaming and ostracization of neurodivergent people and their behavior, like autists and ADHDers (e.x.: being direct and straightforward/blunt in your enthusiasm for someone in the beginning of a relationship is NOT LOVE BOMBING!). Check the replies of this post for the excellent discussion there.

Love bombing is not a euphemism for "too much affection too soon," or "high desire for contact."

"Love bombing" is a term originally used in the context of cults to describe a deliberate and coordinated recruitment method that involved feigning friendship and interest in a potential recruit, via flattery, flirtation, physical affection, and very directed positive attention to everything the recruit says in order to lure them into the cult.

Since cults and abusive relationships operate in similar ways and use similar tactics, love bombing in an interpersonal relationship looks like manufacturing closeness in order to trap someone into a relationship in which the abuser has all the control.

And I know these days there's a million bullshit junky articles out there that make you think this is a symptom of cluster b personality disorders, but there is no way for you to be love bombing somebody without realizing it.

If you are an affectionate person and the level of affection and attention you give makes someone uncomfortable, you are not "accidentally" abusing them.

If you are uncomfortable with the level of affection and attention someone is paying you, they are not de facto abusing you.

Love bombing is about using someone's desire for human connection to fast track them into a situation you control and will feel disinclined to leave.

[falling-through-the-sea]

I love how great is psychology of likung fictional anything. Like. It's really simple. You like shooting pvps? Cool, you're probably really people oriented and extraverted and just have these social skills and everything. You like fairytales and simplistic stuff? A childlike and naīve and a bit stupid, in a cute and endearing way. You like horror? Cool, I feel like you want to stand out and dont mind, no - you WANT to be somethung that society doesnt accept. Or hates. Just reminds me of INFPs and ennea4s. You like fanfiction? Cool, theres a lot of forms and vibes to that, but the strongest I can think of is the want-to-feel closer to the internet and the cool people on it, so you start to have similiar interests and searxh all the crackships and who knows what. Thjs may be my projecting tho haha. You like romance? You"re the average stereotypical want-to-fit-in and like accept social norms person, gives me dreamy 2010s era ESFJ//ISFJ//INFJ//INTP girl vibes. You like fantasy? You're for sure controversial a bit and can be dislikeable and can have some very absurd opinions (imo) but i love them, for the record. Historical fiction? Well, this isnt psychology as much as my own experienves, but hella delusional. But love them. But delulu and wants/needs/has the sense that everything has to be their "real" way. Like if yoh argued over the color of the sky, they'd say purple and not even paid attention to the green that like five people would be telling them. Just. Very stubborn and sorta annoying in that way. I know only two people who love this, the third one is so unanalyzable i wont even mention their mindset. She"s great but yeah.

Also, jusf makrs me think of,,,

Enemies to lovers - accordung to some tiktok, wanting someone to acceot yoh even with the bad parts of you, meaning you feel unlovable if the person saw you at your worst, but, in my personal opinion, i think it's jusf that you have a hood sense of humor, great social perception and skills and have a lot of empathy, but also downplay it a lot and try to act tough, harsh or whatever the characters in your book shall decide to act like. 《Maybe im just projrctung here too...? 😏》

Basically, you have just something in common with the things you like. (I just realized I could just write this and you'd understand - 🥲 )

And it's really just an obvious thing but I love it so much haha. Also it took me an embarassing while to fully realize it. 🤣🫣

[echthr0s]

*grabs Can Calah* YOU

me: what if I changed my whole name again when we change our last names

Can Calah: don’t be an idiot and change your name to Mordred Deschain

me: *think emoji* well since you fucking brought it up

[insert-name-heres-things]

Happy Disability Pride Month!!!

Remember Folks:

- SELF CARE IS NUMBER ONE

- Use your spoons sparingly! Here’s some spoons to go: 🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄

- Clean your mobility aids! (Seriously dude when was the last time you wiped that shit down with an antibacterial?)

- Accommodate yourself, as others will follow.

- Make goals within your reach and abilities

- DO YOUR COPINGS SKILLS

- Remember to stay hydrated and take your meds!

- For my fellow heat sensitive homies, stay cool this summer! A cold rag draped behind your neck, airy clothing, a small portable hand fan, keeping ice packs ready, cold water and expecially cold electrolyte drinks, all do wonders!

- For my fellow autistic folks, don’t be afraid wear earmuffs, stim, use chew charms, whatever it is that helps you regulate. You don’t have to mask if it’s something that isn’t benefitting to your life.

- POTS havin mofos like me, salt the ever loving fuck out of your food. Try different foods with salt, such as fruits and vegetables! I’m currently eating a salty tomato. Drink lots of water, I’ve been aiding gateraid packets to my water and it’s made a HUGE difference, especially as someone who hates drinking water.

- Those with PTSD for whatever reason, I wish you safety and support as you learn to cope and hopefully heal.

- I don’t know exactly what to say to others with H-EDS, as I’m still understanding this disorder other then BE CAREFUL WITH YOURSELF THIS PRIDE MONTH. I swear to god we are the most accident prone mother fuckers lmfao-

- If your immune system is all fucky like mine, keep clean and be sanitary, communicate with others that if they’re sick you can’t be around them, and wear a mask if you feel like that’s the right option for you. In my hometown I’ve gotten yelled at more than once for wearing a mask post-covid, however you can’t let someone else’s ignorance result in your own suffering.

- Don’t forget to move around and stretch! A little movement can do a lot for your body.

- Check in with your disabled friends! Try and see if there’s any way you can help one another, see where both of your strengths and weaknesses lie, and swap some spoons!!

- Be aware of what triggers your disorders. Whether if it’s caffeine triggering bipolar episodes, the weather causing fibro flares, big changes causing meltdowns, overexerting your hypermobility, whatever it is, it matters. Listen to your body and mind.

- Don’t be afraid to call out that doctor who isn’t listening, dismissing your symptoms and medically gaslighting you.

- While it may not seem like a big difference for some, trust me when I say your appetite is so important! Remember if it comes down to it, that it’s better to eat something, ANYTHING, than nothing at all. 

- To that person who might be hesitant, ashamed or might be questioning wether or not they should use a mobility aid, if it’s the difference between you being stuck at home vs going out and living some life… USE THAT MOBILITY AID!!! Same goes for braces and any other tool that may help you live a better quality of life.

- Be accepting towards those with disabilities different then your own- remember this month isn’t a competition about who’s struggling the most, rather to understand that people of physical, psychological, sensory, neurodivergence, and even undiagnosed disabilities all share one thing in common.. WHICH IS BEING DISABLED!

- Doesn’t matter who you are, how young or old, black or white, thick or thin - the disabled minority is one you can end up becoming a part of at any time, and likely will if you live long enough. Disability doesn’t discriminate, so EVERYONE should be advocating for disabled people’s rights.

- And of course, have pride in being disabled. This shit is fucking hard, but if you’re reading this, you’re doing it. Just being here today and doing what you can handle or manage, is doing your best, and that’s enough. You don’t have to push yourselves to impossible lengths to be proud of yourself.

Here, have the disability pride flag:

[cc-kote]

Nine people I'd like to get to know better

WOOPS I did not have time to do this for the past like, week but I've been wanting to bc I love silly little memes like this. Tytyty @ithillia for the tag :3

Last song: All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks by La Dispute (It makes me think about Fives and it hurts so fucking much) 

Favorite colour: GREEN!! and also blue 

Last movie/TV Show: TCW of course, I had a Bad Autism Time™️ and my gf put on the fucking Umbara Arc to calm me down. It worked like a charm what the fuck is wrong w me lmfaooo. 

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: All of the above but spice hurts me. I do it anyway tho, mama raised a little bitch but she didn't raise a quitter lmfaoo. 

Relationship status: So fuckin down bad for my girlfriend hhh 

Last thing you googled: fuckjgn AO3 LMAOOO 

Current obsession: clonesclonesclonesclones forever. I haven't had a special interest/hyperfixation this deep since I was like 12-14 so like this is one of the most important things in my life tbh. Specifically like thinking about how their culture would work, and their solidarity, internal conflicts, shared trauma and how that would relate to those things. Their ideas about personal and cultural identity and how that would vary individually. Things like how their upbringing must have felt, how that affected them and who they became later in life, the things they're taught vs what they truly come to believe once they're out on the field, the psychological effects of O66 on the clones who survived and the devastating impact it must have had- Bro stop me or I'll keep going forever like. I'm in deep and tbh? I wouldn't change it for the world. 

NPT: LMFAO bold of this title to assume that I know 9 people on this site, or am brave enough to tag ppl I haven't talked to often fhsjdmksmf SO if you see this consider yourself tagged. Yes, You. idc if we've never talked It's probably bc I'm too baby, so (unless u don't feel like it) do it 👀 also @mamuzzy and @whatislifewithoutangst if y'all haven't already and wanna do this here u go! 

[starry-bi-sky]

DPxDC Masterpost

Almost all of my DPDC posts have the #Danny Fenton is Not the Ghost King tags, barring perhaps my earliest aus like my Thomas Wayne Au (which will be included in the post). This tag includes art i've made, asks i've answered, and non-fic au posts I've created. This is my main tag!

DPxDC posts under the main tag that don't have their own tag: Danny's Life-Changing Cross-Dimensional Roadtrip with A De-Aged Batman Danny is also Bruce Wayne (Starry goes back to their middle school roots) Danny being the first batkid (if i can get the creative juices flowing I will expand on this. mark my words) There is a Damian clone LOOSE in Amity Park. Oh wait, Danny's got him.

My Biggest DPxDC Aus #Danny Fenton is a Clone: all my posts talking about clone!Danny.

Clone Danny Masterpost: previously my pinned post. A no-powers au where Danny is also a clone of Bruce Wayne, also includes some clone^2

#Clone^2: Clone Damian + Clone Danny au combined, explores themes like identity, found family, and growing into your own as a person. Starting post Here.

#Childhood Friends Au or #Cfau: A childhood friends dead on main au that explores grief, how it may change a person, and how growing up in Crime Alley changed Danny. Contains heavier themes like smoking and mild violence.

#Danyal Al Ghul Au: Mostly contains my au where Danny is not Damian's twin, but his older brother! An excuse for me to delve into the psychological effects that growing up in the League would have on Danny that I don't really see in other DAG aus. Putting the 'assassin' in 'raised by assassins'.

My Minor DPxDC Aus Danny Fenton is Thomas Wayne: an oldie but a goodie! An reveal gone wrong au where Danny decides to go by his middle name 'Thomas' shortly after the events of TUE, and leaves Amity Park two years later. He finds out that Vlad cloned him again and finds an infant in the lab. Danny takes the baby, names him Bruce, and ends up adopted by the Waynes.

#Danny Fenton is Jason Todd au: An au where Danny is Jason Todd! He was adopted by the Fentons shortly after the events of the carjacking.

#Older Brother Danny: contains all of my aus where Danny is an Older Brother. This currently includes only my DAG posts but it's not limited to Danyal Al Ghul.

#Changeling Danny: a half-ghost? oh, wait, no. that's a changeling. even worse! Danny's got latent fey blood from a Fenton getting freaky with a faerie some dozen generations ago, and it reactivated with a fervor when he had his accident! Instead of a halfa, he became one of the Fair Folk.

#Blood blossom au: currently the name for the time being. A Nightingale/First Batkid au where Vlad poisons Danny with blood blossom extract, and it results in Danny running to Batman! Currently only one post, but it has a lot of branching pathways in the reblogs. Batdad centered! Now comes with its own fanfic!

#tales of the passerine: the official au name for my "Danny being the first batkid" post! This au is what inspired changeling Danny. It's the idea that Danny was the first to be adopted by Bruce, and features me favoring batdad over "lmfao Danny goes fuck you bruce and adopts the other kids" au. Because I want batdad.

(Nightingale is, so far, the official vigilante name for the Eldest Batkid Danny concept on my blog.)

#mother of monsters danny: specifically its mother of monsters dan but i digress. I was messing around with my fem!Danyal au and boom! Her evil timeline self is Layal, the terrifying Mother of Monsters who raises any manner of monstrous beasts. I love her <3

#martha knight au same song, different dance! This is a fem danny version of my aforementioned "Danny is Thomas Wayne" au. Except this time around, Danny is Martha! Arguably my favorite between the two, I feel like I'm able to do more with her than Thomas. Her au's vibe is After All by Christine Ebersole

Bonus Excerpt: a ficlet I made in response to a DPxDC Dead on Main prompt! It's not under the main tag as I didn't make the post, however it can be found if you search #fem danny fenton on my blog. I actually really love this idea so I may make it its own tag in the future.

[psychiatricwarfare]

in all my effort to find resources for my friend it has been made apparent to me that 99% of my disorders can be explained away with npd and my therapist may have been correct when she said i was overdiagnosed and having this many diagnoses usually means theres a different underlying cause for them

difficulty focusing? a sign of npd

trouble getting anything done? caused by thinking of myself as innately lower than everyone else and believing ill fail anyway? - a sign of npd

severe dissociation? - a sign of npd

feeling separated from everyone else and inherently different in some way? - a sign of npd

emotional dysregulation - a sign of npd

literally every symptom of adhd, dpdr, depression, anxiety, AND ocd that i experience are also symptoms of npd, the only ones that cant be explained with npd is autism and ptsd, which im not professionally diagnosed with

ill be doing more research to confirm or deny this but i matched up with the diagnostic criteria perfectly, including when reading narcissus and the daffodils, but as of right now it appears i have been overdiagnosed & might not have any of the disorders that ive actually been diagnosed with and its probably Just npd, autism & ptsd

hey yall, this ones for the narcissists- my friend thinks she has npd (and quite frankly so do i) and she's really distraught about it because she's still under the belief that having npd automatically makes you a bad person and im trying to help her get out of that mindset. can any of yall share some things that helped you when you first learned you have npd? i wanna prove to her that she's still a good person & find (actually helpful - not the bs you find on google) resources to help her cope with some of the harder symptoms.

thank you all, and much love to all narcissists, especially those who think your diagnosis makes you bad automatically - it doesn't i promise 🤍

[the-bloody-sadist]

in case no one else has asked, please list your top 10 BL manga/manwha? 👀

i am. very interested in what other media you enjoy, especially BL

Combining these two bc I didn't wanna leave the second out!

(I wasn't a big fan of Blood Bank personally but I'm so glad it helped you with your world building Lil Whale!!)

I'm hoping some of these are unheard of for you guys because THERE ARE SO MANY BL/YAOI AND I READ THEM CONSTANTLY BUT NOT SO MANY ARE FANTASTIC AND MIND-BLOWING AND SPECTACULAR AND DEEPLY PSYCHOLOGICAL! I'm pretty sure I'll end up listing WAY more than 10, mainly because I want to highlight ones I feel like a lot of people haven't read. ALSO because I read so fucking many of them that I've collected a stash and NOW IS MY CHANCE TO YELL ABOUT THEM.

Just a disclaimer, these are not in any sort of order, as they're all about the same level in my head, just grouped. I'll list the "big name" BLs that I adore after these! First up are the ones that either have a quiet fandom or aren't well known! Since there'll be so many, I'm not going to say much about them, just know that usually no BL/Yaoi is perfect to me, since there are many bad psychology tropes here and there or unnecessary cruelties that aren't exactly realistic etc., but overall, I like the way that the story and characters are handled and/or love the art.

Here's the top five of my top ten that's not a top ten bc there are so many (I just said I wouldn't group them but I lied my ass off apparently):

Jealousy [Scarlet Beriko]: This is one of those that emotionally hits so hard that it will stick with me forever and I will usually tear up just a tiny bit when I think back to the moments that made this one so beautiful. A lot of times a story with major hurt, angst, and tragedy won't wrap up with enough to make me scream and cheer at the end. But THIS ONE DID. And I stopped reading for a while when a big event happened because I thought it would end horribly and I'd have to suffer three weeks of fiction-induced depression for a man who wasn't even real. BUT NAY. The themes you get in this one revolve around loneliness (huge draw for me, it always hits), mafia-connected characters and the rivalries from that, self-destructive prostitution, and characters who have difficulty receiving love without freaking out. Are those even themes idk. OH WELL. YOU GET THE POINT. I want this one on my shelf. You might've heard of it, but the fandom is silent so I never did. T_T OH ALSO THE ART ON THIS ONE IS GORGEOUS I FUCKING LOVE IT.

Hitori to Hitori no 3650nichi [Hitomi]: First of all, favorite manga artist. FAVORITE MANGA ARTIST. I'm never exactly sure if the artist is also the writer or if the writer is never the artist or...BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER. Anyway! I listed this particular title because it was the first that I found by this person - but then I discovered it was a part of a bigger series, and there are like I DON'T KNOW FIVE DIFFERENT MANGA?? OR SOMETHING??? Related to this one. I don't know which order, I just know that I read them all in a frenzy. THE CHARACTERS. OH! OH THE CHARACTERS! Oh my gods, it's so good. LMFAO. The arcs these characters have are fantastic, and I loved the fact that the abuser in one is shown to be the victim of abuse in a prequel story, and that his anger issues and other elements of his personality came about to affect him and destroy him. Just...I don't recall the details, READ IT. That's all. Spectacular depictions of nuanced trauma within abusive relationships.

The Beast Must Die [Lee Hyeon Sook]: This remains one of my favorite depictions IN ANY MEDIA of a psychopath, because it's SO accurate and I'm SO fucking proud of the author for doing their research and OH MY GODS YOU GUYS IT'S ABOUT TO GET A DRAMA CD LET'S FUCKING GO! This story is so good. It's so evil. It's so psycho-thriller. It's so WELL DONE. It features a dark academia-ish secret society within a college setting who hunt people for sport, sometimes. LIKE. Come on. And the psychopath (dark hair) IS THE MAIN LOVE INTEREST! You could literally hear the summary and go "oh this is for Sadist". And I don't get a lot of those that deliver this well. SOMETIMES the art makes me twist my head a little but YOU KNOW WHAT I DO NOT CARE OKAY? It's just SO good. There's murder, there's kidnapping, and - most importantly - a main character who doesn't just DEAL with whatever the psychopath does. He's smart, he fights back, he learns to understand psychopathy to determine if he should remain with the love interest...it's fantastic. That's all. I will stop. *BANGS THE WALL*

Aporia [Seontae]: ALL HAIL THE HEALTHY BDSM RELATIONSHIPS THAT STILL HOLD TENSION AND EMOTIONAL WEIGHT AND SPEAK TO ME!!!!!!! HELLO!!!!! This is my favorite BDSM-themed story. Everything is consensual, but is everything safe??? Not when it comes to the main character's emotions and tendency to sacrifice his wellbeing for a partner. BUT NOT TO WORRY, HIS SADISTIC LOVE INTEREST IS CONSIDERATE AND ATTENTIVE AND CARES ABOUT HIS FEELINGS!! This is, perhaps, one of my favorite depictions of a REAL sadist. A real one as in a realistic, irl BDSM-relationship sadist. Someone who is just as worried about taking care of his partner as he is about hurting him JUUUUST right. ANYWAY! THAT'S ALL! READ IT! HE'S LITERALLY ME!

Royal Servant [MasterGin, Chungnyun]: Okay, we were talking about healthy BDSM in the previous one, now let's talk about TOXIC BDSM-THEMES THAT I LOVE. Lmao. DO YOU LIKE MASTER/SLAVE DYNAMICS? DO YOU LIKE STORIES WHERE THE ARC LEADS TO THE ABUSIVE MASTER EVENTUALLY LEARNING TO NOT BE ABUSIVE AND LOVE THE SLAVE? YEAH ME TOO. I DON'T NEED TO DESCRIBE THIS ANY FURTHER. AUTHOR OF ANGEL BUDDY, THIS IS THE ONE THAT I KNEW HER FOR FIRST.

A bunch of other good ones you may or may not have heard of (I won't describe every one of these unless I have something particular to say, so enjoy the pictures from them that I snatched):

Love me in the Wilderness [Wang Tao]

Neon Sign Amber [Ogeretsu Tanaka]

Zetsubou ni Nake [Shinou Ryo]: Guys. This story is UNIQUE AS HELL. I had to say something about it. The premise is that a man who was raped turns around and goes back after his rapist and rapes him back, and then they fall in love. IT'S....the amount of times my jaw dropped was insane on this one. SOMEHOW IT'S WRITTEN SO WELL. SOMEHOW THEY NAILED THE STRANGE REALISM OF IT AND HAD ME TEARING UP OVER THE INTENSITY OF THE RAPE SCENES. VERY WELL-PACED, VERY TRAUMATIC IN A GOOD WAY. HIGHLY RECOMMEND. The way they come to love each other after this crazy foundation of mutual rape is IMPRESSIVE. Kudos to the writer.

Love or Hate [Yeongha]: This is a very well-known one but there's like zero fandom so I think it fits here. Also a lot of hate going around for it? Which I never understood, fuck those guys. This remains one of the most beautifully-written that I've ever read, and I mean that purely in like...the ACTUAL writing on the page. I'm talking poetry, purple prose. I just recall being blown away by that, and no manga before or since has ever reached its level. For once I felt like the writer was also a novelist because of the way that they put things, and had a clear voice in the style. Did the main boy end up with someone I didn't want him to end up with at the end? Yes. But I felt like it fit pretty well, and it was sort of a tragedy, and it was supposed to hit you painfully in the gut. A lot of people were mad at the main character for that and I don't really think it's fair. In any case! A beautiful story with complex characters and intriguing dilemmas. Highly recommend it.

Shangri La no Tori (Birds of Shangri La) [Ranmaru Zariya]

Two in Six Billion [Denzou]

The Pizza Delivery Man and The Gold Palace [Upi]: Great story and character-building so far! I will say that once it became porn, it dove a little too heavily into it for me. Like I only needed one scene of the porn, I was enjoying the panic attack scenes much more. BUT YEAH, IT'S ONGOING, SO WE'LL SEE WHERE IT GOES! But the panic attack scenes were the reason I read it and yes, I did tear up.

Sleeping Dead and Living Dead [Asada Nemui]: I RECENTLY FOUND THIS ONE AND ADOOOOOOREEE IT SO MUCH. I DO NOT CARE THAT IT'S AN OLD SCIENTIST AND HIS ZOMBIE PATIENT. NORMALLY THAT WOULD HOLD NO SWAY OVER ME, BUT OH GODS, THE ART IS SO PRETTY AND THE STORY IS SO GOOD. I LOVE THE LITTLE ZOMBIE MAN! I LOVE THE LITTLE ROMANCE THEY'VE GOT!

Private Lessons [ANCO, Mongya]: It's cuuuuute what can I saayyyyy it has BDSM and threesomes and I liked it. Very entertaining. Scratches the BDSM itch and the little SUB WAS SO CUTE. Anyway.

Kingyo no Ubugoe [Gontaku Nido]

From Points of Three [White Eared]: Threesome dynamics!!

Silent Lover [Qiang Tang, Bai Li Jun Xi]: I STOPPED THIS ONE AT A CERTAIN POINT BECAUSE IT DIPPED INTO WEIRD M-PREG AND STUFF I CANNOT READ. But BEFORE all that, I was deeply ingrained in this one. It has a main character who can't speak (a particular weakness of mine) and he's OH SO CUTE and he's given as a sex slave basically to the emperor (emperor? idk he's a kingly man, something like that), and the emperor is evil but learns to be soft and yet it takes a LONG TIME SO I WAS BAWLING HYSTERICALLY OVER SOME OF THE HEARTWRENCHINGLY PAINFUL SCENES IN THIS FOR THE POOR YUU-ER. A good read until it decided to go the omegaverse-by-magic-potions route. I didn't stay to figure out where it actually ended up.

Yoru wa Tomodachi [Ido Gihou]

Toumei na Ai no Utsuwa [Hitomi]

Re:Birth [Misuaki Asou]: The singular omegaverse story in existence that I actually liked. Hopefully that says a lot. Mostly because it's about the omegaverse elements NOT being present for the main character and him trying to fake it because he's lonely and afraid that his partner (an alpha *shakes off the disgusting label because who the fuck thought alpha was a cool word*) will leave him if he finds out he's just a regular guy (aka beta I guess? ABO is weird idc).

Sahara no Kuro Washi [Soutome Emu]: MASTER SLAVE MASTER SLAVE---

Haru ni Kaeru [Kunieda Saika]

Incorrigible [Bbong]

Well Done! [ANCO, Mongya]

Nemuri Otoko to Koi Otoko [Zariya Ranmaru]

Even If You Don't Love Me [Pando]: It dropped off SUPER hard (it's ongoing still) but damn was it good in the beginning. I am sick and tired of where it's at currently but the psychological manipulation and the horror of a certain twist in the storyline was CRUSHING to me. I only wish that it would have gone a better way after it happened, because it slowly destroyed itself and became like a lot of tropey rape stories. The asshole just keeps being an asshole and it's not really where the story seemed to want to go with that. But otherwise, it started off strong and I'll give it kudos for that.

Bigger titles I'm pretty sure everyone has heard of that I enjoy:

Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai [Yoneda Kou]: Is it a little unrealistic that literally everyone in this story is gay apparently and wants to fuck one man apparently and/or rape him? Yes, absolutely. Does that matter once you're in the story and it's so good and all these unrealistic cruelties make a really strong bond between the main love interest and this self-destructive masochist who's probably not really a masochist but only interested in hurting himself because he doesn't know how else to handle his trauma from childhood? Ummmm yeah. Anyway! This one had a lot of inspiration and a lot of tears and a lot of obsession from me. I re-read it all the time, I watch the movie over and over, I listen to the audio drama and cry at my favorite scenes. Do I care in the end that it's a little unrealistic at times? No but I do laugh sometimes when I'm about to share it with a new person. Because BL is just like that generally and you've got to put up with a little of those tropes to find your favorite stories. THIS IS ONE OF THE TOP FAVORITES OF ALL TIME FOR ME BTW, IT'S ONLY SO LOW DOWN HERE BECAUSE PRETTY MUCH EVERYONE IN YAOI KNOWS ABOUT THIS ONE ALREADY, AND WE'RE ALL AWARE OF HOW GOOD IT IS.

ENNEAD [Mojito]: I will say that this is basically the best manga/comic/manhua...what's the Chinese word idk ANYTHING OF THIS MEDIA TYPE that I have ever read. It's not done, and people have been complaining that it's starting to fall into the common BL tropes but you know what I do NOT care. Mojito is a genius, Mojito is a master storyteller, Mojito is beautiful, Mojito is strong - I just love Mojito and this work. So much. The action, the horror of rape, the deep-set character conflicts and dilemmas and internal turmoils. Everything, nailed it. Nailed it. And not to mention it's set in FUCKING EGYPTIAN MYTHOLOGY AND THEY'RE ALL GODS AND THEY HAVE SUCH COOL BATTLES AND COSTUMES AND DUDE???? I'm so hooked. That's all.

Killing Stalking [Koogi]: OBVIOUSLY. I don't really need to say anything about this one except that yeah, some of the psychology is a little off and some of it is just super shallow. But I loved the characters and that's what mattered in the end. I fell in love with Sangwoo too and it ripped my heart out when I read the ending. I was depressed for like two weeks and it was the first story that had ever affected me that way, but I was also younger and this was one of my first yaoi/BLs and yeah. GREAT story though, fantastic storytelling, very lovable characters. Sangwoo was handled so much better than most "asshole/kidnapper/rapist" characters and I will never stop appreciating that, because a lot of writers tend to forget that your villains have to have redeeming qualities if you want us to like them (????). Jinx, I'm fucking coming for you. Suck my dick. KOOGI FTW.

Missing Love/A Married Man [In Hyerin]: Some of the DESCRIPTIONS of how trauma works especially of the sexual nature in this story are SO. SO. GOOD. However, I am beginning to grow VERY ANNOYED at where it decided to go with the most current updates of the story. The author did enough trauma to the main boy, now it's getting so incredibly excessive that it's overdoing it and the author's kinks are showing through. LIKE I GET IT. Okay? I do. But this one became too much and I need him to return to the actual story arc of going through that trauma so he can HEAL with the right person taking care of him.

MadK [Ryo Sumiyoshi]: I am into NONE of the kinks that would lead to me picking up this manga. I hate demons, I'm not a monsterfucker, I can't do extreme guro, and yet I SAW CANNIBALISM. THAT WAS THE ONE THING THAT I THOUGHT I'D GIVE IT A TRY FOR. And then accidentally I got obsessed because the plot is AMAZING and the writing is SO GOOD and who cares if I hate demons and monsters ALL OF THEM ARE BADASS AND HOT (??) AND IT CEASES TO MATTER. Good on the writer for making them appeal by personality alone and expressions and whatever else you signed a deal with the devil to make me like because it worked. Also the guro is beautiful, so it doesn't even matter. Hannibal levels.

Warehouse [Killerwhale]

Painter of the Night [Byeonduck]

Viewfinder/Finder [Yamane Ayano]

Given [Kizu Natsuki, Gusari]

Nii-Chan [Harada] (and basically every other work by Harada)

Sadistic Beauty Side Story [Geumsan Lee, Woo Yeonhui]

Dine With a Vampire [Pangin, Pinko]

Angel Buddy [Mastergin, Chungnyun]

My Partner's Tastes and Fetishes [Deok Hwa]

Interview with a Murderer [KJK]

On or Off [A1]

Steel Under Silk [Snob]

The Pawn's Revenge [Evy]: It was going to be SO GOOD! And then it dropped off harder than a boulder from a balcony and I have absolutely no idea why the author took it the way that they took it, but go off I guess. It's boring as hell now but it started off with promise and I enjoyed the art and character designs. Too bad, I suppose.

Caste Heaven [Ogawa Chise]: An old classic with all the sticky sometimes icky mostly ridiculous BL tropes but hey, it's cute. It's sexy. It's fun. I don't care.

Wet Sand [Doyak]: We're still in the beginning stage of this one but I'm excited to see where it goes! Plus the art SLAPS ASS like nobody's business.

19 Days [Old Xian]: I hate comedy, I hate fluff, I hate buddies that never become lovers, but none of that mattered when I picked this one up. The duality of man. Bite-sized chapters and ACTUALLY AN EVENTUAL ROMANCE that none of us thought we'd ever get.

Legs That Won't Walk [Black Apricot]: Although this one dropped off hard for me and I'm really just following it to see if it picks up again and does something interesting (it probably won't) I did enjoy it in the beginning. I just get tired of the "asshole just keeps being an asshole and nothing else but woobified slut keeps coming back to him??" without the strong and realistic undercurrent of Reasons Why Someone Would Come Back such as manipulation or threats or unhealthy attachment. Perhaps it was sorta there in the beginning with them but now I'm just like why are we still continuing this story.

Pearl Boy [Inking, Zoy]: *Awkwardly scratches neck* It's not the best okay? It's not. It's really not. I don't like half of the things that occur in this one, but the ART, bro. THE ART, BRO? That's what got me into it and what kept me into it, PLUS I do like little Jooha. I stayed for Jooha, too. Dooshik drives me a little batty most of the time and looks ugly for half the story to me, but when he's badass, he's pretty badass, so I can forgive him. I really don't know why he has such drastically changing appearances because I thought he was someone completely different for a bit LMAO. In any case, I have to admit I like the uhhhhh danger that Jooha gets himself into and the crazy things that make no sense but you know what he gets hurt and then there's comfort and rescue and they cry and I cease to care that it makes no sense. (Sorta, I don't actually cease to care I just laugh awkwardly and go okay sure that's how it works because it's so hard to find stories that don't do this LOL I'm beating a dead horse) BUT WHY DOES HE CUM PEARLS? WILL WE EVER KNOW? WHO THE HELL THOUGHT OF THAT AND WITHOUT A SUPPORTING MAGIC SYSTEM IN THE WORLD TO MAKE THAT MAKE SENSE? IT WENT DOWNHILL SO FAST AND THE ENDING IS TERRIBLE BTW. THE VILLAIN SUCKS.

That's it. I can't talk to much or I'll run out of words but HOPE YOU GUYS FIND SOME NEW READS!!

[tf2heritageposts]

i think i am way too enthusiastic about psychology for this community college. we were going over more psych today and we kept touching on subjects i know VERY well, and i wanted to bring my own commetary and things the prof didnt mention but i didnt get picked because i was doing too much of it plus asking too many questions. loved the subject too much i guess LMFAO

[grassoftunnel]

On Genji…

The way its phrased in the ps3 Witch Hunt translation Genji says “I am a native of Taiwan”and let me tell you…the way my face CRACKED as an asian to read that and realise how hes so happily subservient as a BUTLER to this proud japanese fascist!

But then looking at the wiki it seems more unclear whether he said that because hes ethnic japanese who was born and raised there (as opposed to ethnic taiwanese who assimilated) vs kinzo who migrated with his family as a child.

I then looked it up and found the history of taiwan and its occupation by japan and how that affects its peoples identity, and for many people who lived through that generation, the memory of that time is complex and radically different from most other parts of asia (THOUGH DISCLAIMER IM BY NO MEANS AN EXPERT IM JUST SOME IDIOT WHO READ EXTREMELY SHALLOWLY AND BRIEFLY TO GET A ROUGH OVERVIEW). And ethnic japanese or not, his family were unambiguous shameless (proud, even) imperial collaborators and profiteers. Who were clearly embodying japanese ideals, culture, etc. even if they weren’t ethnically japanese, they had totally assimilated. Then after japanese surrender, Taiwan is plunged into political turmoil with the economic and political elites of which Genji was a part, being made to bleed and starve just like everyone else. Which is probably why in the manga, Genji is all disheveled and in a bad way when Kinzo finds him. Kinzo really did rescue Genji from having to continue to live through that.

Also…as a young master in Taiwan, of a family making their fortune off of imperial collaboration, Genji has spent his entire life turning away from difficult things and benefitting from a way of life built on the suffering of others. < edited to remove a line indicating that ryukishi deliberately named the ushiromiya siblings after nazis, this is pure speculation, as well as more lines of speculation about the intentionality, originally I firmly leaned toward it being unintentional, of Ryukishis critical portrayal of fascism in Umineko, I’ve since been told more about its portrayal in his other works and it’s changed my mind, see the replies if you’re interested!), but it goes to show Genji is a seasoned doublethinker…

It almost makes me laugh seeing him apologise to Sayo after everything, when really imo it only served to muddle up the painful feelings tearing apart her heart even more. It’s really incredible how he’s able to genuinely feel that pain for her while not regretting loving and serving Kinzo and really doing all of this for his sake. Sayo’s entire life was a pet project of his for Kinzo’s sake, or imo for Genji’s sake, since it’s very explicitly his way of “saving” Kinzo from himself. If it was really for her sake and not Kinzo’s he would have made it so she would live a life far away from Rokkenjima and never have to be burdened by this awful truth. While he cared for Sayo in his own way, she was ultimately a prop in Kinzo’s life, in Genji’s mind. Anything and everything to care for and protect and provide for this man who he loved so much...

Genji is such an absolutely evil bastard who ruined Sayo’s life (with not one waver in regards to his purpose for raising her like he did) and was an accessory to the almost unthinkably horrific life ruining of her mother. And not even for money like Kumasawa and Nanjo (who had his friendship with Kinzo but nothing approaching Genji’s Everything..). but out of an unmatched passion and almost fanatical identity revolving around servility to Him…

Theres really nowhere else hes happier or more fulfilled, than by his Master’s side. Double crunchy because Kinzo first loved him as his peer, and after rescuing him from Taiwan, Genji, as a point of principle, refuses to meet him as anything but his loyal servant.

Mrs Danvers and Max von Mayerling are actually individuals with normal psychological profiles compared to Genji Ronoue ahahaha. And if anything lmfao at least Mrs Danvers and Max von Mayerling got to hit! Genji the eternal service top in body and spirit but crucially not in practice….