#i literally think about this so often. i have much to say. mostly because i think shockwave would look very very cute with a full tummy
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creakture · 22 hours ago
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sorry for being short and not explaining myself.
if you sufficiently don't look like a cop or like someone who would call the cops, and you spend much time in public, people will probably ask if you know where to buy drugs that are more illegal than T. sometimes they'll even ask if you wanna share drugs already have!
pople sus out their coworkers and ask them about drugs. people find drugs at school. people find drugs at church.
gym bros on gear who are otherwise friendly to you will often be so excited to hook you up. they're on gear because it's exciting to them! you're asking someone to share their hobby with you!! just don't be mega weird and it'll be fine.
you don't even need to say you're trans!!!
and when you're wrong, you're wrong. oh well. dudes who aren't on gear mostly don't care what other people do - they just don't do it that way.
literally this is what flagging is FOR - people with marginalized interests still need to find each other. we always have managed this.
I promise that if you go to the gym and observe and make friendly conversation with people and you try to figure it out that you'll eventually get there.
"uhm I'm sorry did you know that's ILLEGAL!?" Is not the helpful advice that you think it is. actually, you can do illegal things! it's very easy. often as easy as patiently observing people before deciding who to ask.
While I have thoughts about the election that I haven't quite been able to put into words yet, I've seen a lot of misconceptions that "if DIY HRT is so easy for gymbros to get, it must be easy for trans men too!" and "Just go up to a gymbro and ask for his T!"
As the "trans gym bro" blog, I feel like I have to be the one to say
NO. IT IS NOT THAT SIMPLE.
First of all, because T is a regulated substance, it is hard for gymbros to get as well. That means even if they DID use T, they would NOT be sharing.
Secondly, there's "natty" culture. For those who aren't in the know "natty" is short for "natural". Being "natty" means you got your gains without the use of testosterone or steroids. There are those of the mindset "if you're not natty whatever, just disclose", but there are also those who look down on the idea of not being natty. Not to mention a lot of these gymbros strongly discourage the use of T in their circles because of the negative effects (namely the aromatization of T into E) of too much T. Basically, not every gymbro uses T, many actively discourage it, and those that do use T are likely hiding it.
Third, very few people are going to just bring their T into a locker room. Partially because of the previous point, but also because the locker room is just unsanitary, often don't have a proper disposal bin for sharps, and/or because the gym bans the use of steroids (sometimes needles I think?) entirely (this may not stop everyone but it's at least a deterrent).
Fourth, and very importantly, a large number of gymbros are transphobic. This varies from ignorant to actively malicious, and you never know which one you're going to get. To be fair, not every single gymbro is transphobic, but there is a large enough portion of them that are, such that you would be at substantial risk if you outed yourself to one. No transmasc in their right mind is going to risk outing themselves to someone who hates you AND is jacked as fuck.
There are other things preventing those who want testosterone HRT from accessing it also, such as doctors refusing to prescribe it to an AFAB person because "you'll ruin your body" reasons, those gymbros being a big part of the reason why T is a controlled substance, as well as it just being unsafe to use someone else's vial of T.
The point is though, we DO need resources for DIY T, ESPECIALLY in the current political climate in the US. Do NOT fucking ignore us because you refuse to acknowledge that not every gymbro is going to fit whatever idea of them you have in your head.
Anyway. I have to hit legs now.
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lemotmo · 2 days ago
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hey so this has been rotting in my brain since yesterday and I'm going crazy so I need some outside perspective
im a buddie shipper and 100% believe they are perfect for each other, but sometimes it feels like buck is a better to friend to eddie than vice versa? like buck is there for eddie all the time and often goes above and beyond for him, buck gave eddie carla, was there for him during eddie/shannon troubles (s2 christmas ep), showed up to his probie ceremony in his cast, took care of him and chris during shooting, built chris a skateboard, literally saved him in the shooting, always gives him advice on relationships (told him to prioritise his happiness over chris during ana), showed him charlie at horse therapy, was there for him with his panic attacks, and then his eventual breakdown (repairing his wall), he was there at the diaz household when eddie went to texas, helped chris when eddie was at therpay, always babysists, was with eddie when the kim fiasco went down, never judged but gave good advice, he was there when chris left and even after (eg s8 chris bday zoom party)
if we compare this with the times eddie supports buck its not nearly as extensive, or oftentime his help/time comes with strings attached, eg tsunami (gave buck chris to cheer him up, but also got free childcare (twice)), with the poker (used his maths powers, but also helped cheer him up), he was just missing mostly from buck sperm donor storyline, he did help buck with donor baby trauma and all his relationship traumas, the thing is that whenever hes there for buck its often buck instigating it, he always akss for advice/help, its very rare that eddie does something completetly selfless for buck unprompted, whereas we have so many examples of buck doing that for eddie,
it rly funny when eddie complains of buck always thinking of himself/being selfish when hes consitently THE character who cares for others more than himself, im not saying buck is a perfect uwu little baby (the lawsuit for example, but even in this case the way it panned out buck took 100% of the blame, and no one even tried to understand where he was coming from except maybe Hen), or that eddie is the devil, i just want to acknowledge that buck similar to his childhood is always giving but never getting that same energy back, and that does make him a tragic character, because even in adulthood when he does have a found family he still sometimes faces the problems he did as a child, the show should actually acknowledge that buck is so used to being treated like shit he kinda takes it from everyone, and when they do get together maybe they have a conversation about this idk, sorry for the long ass rant and feel free to maybe add some counterpoints of eddie helping buck unconditionally, but this is all i could think of
Oh no no NO no NOOOO no NO no no no NO No NOOOOOOO no NO Nonny, just NO. 🤦‍♀️😬🤦‍♀️😬🤦‍♀️
Don’t drop this in my ask box Nonny. You need to back waaaaaaay up with this. You need to get rid of this bad take, because it’s absolute garbage. 😖
It seems to me that you fundamentally do not understand Eddie Diaz and how much he KNOWS and GETS Evan Buckley.
So buckle up Nonny, I’m about to take you on a walk down Eddie Diaz-lane:
Buck doesn’t need someone to feel sorry for him or to indulge him. Buck needs someone to tell him that enough is enough. That’s where Eddie comes in. He is the one who steps in and tells Buck to stop spiralling, because that’s canonically what he does. Remember how Maddie had Buck’s friends and family check up on him in shifts after the lightning strike? Eddie was the only one who said no. Why? Not because he didn’t want to, but because he knew exactly what Buck needed and it wasn’t to be pampered, but to be understood. And lo an behold, who shows up on Eddie’s doorstep at the end of the day? Buck. Ready to commit murder because he is tired of everyone walking on eggshells around him. And Eddie is the only one who knew Buck enough to know this wouldn’t end well. He knows exactly what makes Buck tick.
He knows what Buck needs or doesn’t need. He knows that Buck sometimes gets into his own head a little too much and that is when he acts and does something small and inconspicuous that will resolve the situation.
Often times Buck only sees the worst sides of a problem and he becomes blind to the good things in life. That’s when Eddie steps in and puts him firmly back on the ground again, reminding him that he is loved by his friends and family and he’ll be okay.
Do you remember whose voice Buck heard when he disassociated in the scene with Gerrard? Eddie’s was most prominent. Why? Because he knows he can always count on Eddie to get him out of his spirals. Eddie understands him on a fundamental level. Throughout the whole time that Gerrard was the Captain of the 118, Buck was struggling while Eddie kept his cool. We saw him hovering near Buck a lot of the time, trying to give him some advice, but mostly he offered him silent support.
It’s at these difficult times when Eddie comes in and NO Nonny, this does not come with any strings attached. Yes, Eddie barged in and told Buck to take care of Chris before the tsunami, but not to get free child care. That was just an excuse, a little white lie. No, this was because he knew that Buck was wallowing in self-pity and he wanted to get him out of that pit. He told him that Chris never ever feels sorry for himself and that Buck should take that as an example. And it's exactly what Buck needed as well. Bringing Chris was a very clever diversion to get Buck out of the house and start living again. (Of course then they got caught in a tsunami, but that’s not the point here.)
The poker date had NOTHING to do with Eddie wanting to USE Buck’s math powers. I assure you, Buck is a grown man. If he hadn’t wanted to go on that poker date he wouldn’t have gone and if he hadn’t wanted to stay there, he could have just gotten up and left. Eddie wouldn’t have held it against him either, because that’s the kind of friend he is… selfless. In that episode we see that Eddie was bang on again. Buck thrived during that poker game. He had fun being the best and Eddie indulged him, keeping a close eye on him at all times. He knew exactly how to get Buck out of his funk and his spiral of self-pity.
When has Eddie ever been selfish in all of these scenarios? I’ll tell you… NEVER.
Another example: After Eddie got shot, Buck sat in that hospital chair, telling Eddie it should have been him that was shot. Eddie immediately said: OH HELL NO! He then revealed he had put in his will that Chris would go to Buck if anything ever happened to Eddie. And not just to the benefit of Chris, because we all know that boy would thrive with a caretaker like Buck, but also for Buck himself. Eddie knows that if anything were to happen to him, there wouldn’t be anyone there who understands him enough to get him out of that slump and that spiral of blaming himself. So he gave Buck a task and a goal, something to do to keep him focused and sharp. Buck would never give into self-blame if he had to take care of Chris.
Eddie has consistently been shown to be willing to step in to Buck’s messes, sitting down next to him and listening to his plight. The hospital talk after Chimney got stabbed and Buck decided it was a great idea to illegally get into Chim’s phone? Eddie sat next to him and really listened, told him that he understood, but that he was still in the wrong. Buck needed to hear that, as he was increasingly getting more and more anxious about Maddie. He needed the voice of reason.
The balcony talk, after Chim had given Buck the black eye, where Eddie reassured him that Chimney would forgive him. Sure, he did it with a joke, but again that was what was needed. That joke provided some levity to the situation. Something Buck absolutely appreciated in that moment.
Even that last scene in 8x06. Eddie had just danced in joy (and in his underwear), the bell rings and who's there? Buck, looking miserable. Eddie could have turned him away, unwilling to deal with his obvious bad mood. Instead he just welcomed him in and no words needed to be spoken. His quiet acceptance was enough to let Buck know that he would be there for him, no matter what.
Point is, Eddie Diaz KNOWS Evan Buckley to the core and there isn’t anything he isn’t willing to do for him. Nothing he has ever done for Buck came with strings attached.
And as for Buck helping Eddie out and doing all of the things you listed? That’s just the way Buck loves. He loves completely and wholly. Once you are a part of his family, he will go above and beyond for you, no questions asked. He goes to bat for Eddie again and again. Him and Chris are two of the most important people in his life and Buck loves to give selflessly to the people he loves.
So taking care of Chris, babysitting him? That’s not a hardship for him. He does it with love and joy. Showing up for Eddie with his leg in a cast? Eddie never asked him to do that. He decided to do this because of love. Helping Eddie out during and after the breakdown? He willingly stepped into Eddie’s mess because that is the way Buck loves.
I could go on and on about this, but I’ll end it here.
Bottom line is this Nonny…
NO! Eddie doesn’t wait until Buck comes to him to ask for help. He gives him some time, yes. But then, when he sees him struggling? That’s when he steps in to help him out, to care for him, to love him the way Buck deserves to be loved. The only selfishness Eddie indulges in is that he WANTS and NEEDS to see Buck happy again. Because seeing Buck happy? That is what makes Eddie happy.
So NO, he has never treated Buck like shit and he never will. Neither has anyone else on the 118 by the way. Buck was treated like shit by his parents, that’s true, but the moment he stepped into the 118 he found his family. And they always treat him with the respect and love he deserves.
I’m not going to get too deep into the lawsuit arc, because I think both Buck and the 118 made some mistakes there, but in the end they got through it, which is what a good family does. Eddie was a little prickly in the beginning sure, but he had good reason for that. Buck had hung out all of his dirty laundry to that stupid lawyer. But they got through it and their bond became even stronger. At the end of that arc I do feel like everyone in the 118 understood Buck a little better than before. So did Eddie.
So NO. They don’t need to have some kind of conversation about this ‘imaginary’ problem you think they have Nonny. They do however, need to sit down and have a conversation about what they want out of life and how to go on from there. Them having been friends for so long, the switch to become more than friends is huge. They definitely need to talk about that and about Chris’s part in that as well. Whatever decision they make and take in life, Chris will be a part of it.
*deep breath*
Okay, I feel like I got out of my system what I needed to get out.
Listen Nonny, I appreciate you taking the time to drop something in my ask box and asking for some outside perspective, but in the future? Maybe keep these very bad and wrong takes about Eddie Diaz out of my ask box and just post them on your own blog? I’m sure you’ll find people out there who will agree with you, but I am decidedly NOT that person.
Thank you kindly. 😌
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solplease · 2 days ago
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i've been very excited to post this but here are my ocs haha!! meet lune, cecilia, nox, and aster!
close ups, more info, and a more detailed relationship chart under the cut! this is gonna be a long post haha. there's also some more info about rowan!
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cecilia's twin (he's the older twin) ((by two minutes. lol))
the type to go “here to here, i’ll buy it all”
he's got a temper
possessive, devoted, and jealous yandere
people think he's a tad bit insane (and he's self aware mostly,,)
gets into fights often
“want me to kill that guy for you?” (he’s serious btw)
he’s not nice lmao, but to you he is (in his own special way of course..!)
kind of like a cat who will proudly leave dead rats and leaves on your doorstep as a gift bc it thinks you can’t hunt for yourself
hates nox LMFAO
difficult to approach at first but once you get close he won’t ever let you go.
extroverted
LOUD. someone shut him up, this mf does NOT stop yapping bro
annoying as hell and he doesn’t know that lmao
if he absolutely has to, he’ll behave. but it's... odd
constantly needs to be doing something or he’ll get bored lol
has a bit of a sweet tooth (typical)
Bastard (not literally)
played the piano when he was younger with his sister, but he hated playing it
bad terms with his family except for cecilia
huge rebellious streak
shockingly will not kidnap you! everyone already knows you’re his, and he’s yours. and he won’t let anyone get in between you two. yay..!
hates it when you don’t pay attention to him (will absolutely start sulking too)
he’s impulsive but he’s not completely reckless
you probs shouldn’t trust him too much though he has good (????) intentions lol
seems silly (debatable really) but he’s dangerous.
half of the things he says sound like jokes but trust me, he means it. he’d do anything and everything for you, don’t forget!
shockingly pouty and whiny, only in front of you though
him and cecilia have matching bracelets from when they were younger which they both wear to this day
he’s oblivious as fuck, and an idiot
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lune's twin (she's younger)
normal (somewhat) ((not really))
sweet and friendly
really likes giving gifts to people she cares about
jumps to conclusion and freaks out easily, but she’s subtle about it
constantly stressed (lune is her brother, so… i get it)
introverted (runs on a social battery)
says things without thinking sometimes
people pleaser
awkward as hell tbh, but it’s really not obvious because she’s good at putting on a front 
kinda has the ”””””princely””””” persona (i didnt know how to describe that better lmao
has abandonment issues
girlfail tbh
hardworking
shes really protective of her loved ones
likes cute things
has issues with her family but still talks to them (lune does NOT)
on really good terms with lune, they’re very close (even though he’s a huge troublemaker that stresses the shit out of her) ((if he fucks around too much she’ll give him a good smack))
packs a good punch
SENSITIVE…
potential yandere? still not too sure if i’ll make her a fully fledged yan but she def has some of the traits lol
her and lune have matching bracelets from when they were younger! (she wears it everyday!)
she doesn’t mean to put on a front it just kinda happens automatically lmao
could kill someone... probably wouldnt tho
used to play the piano with lune, she still plays it now too (as a hobby)
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cunning and annoying
def the type to kidnap you
oddly sweet (???)
but also ominous as hell
docile with the one he loves
isolating and manipulative yandere
dislikes lune
nice but you can tell he’s putting up a wall (with strangers and friends)
introverted
wouldn’t put stalking past him tbh
he’s the type that wants to know everything about you.
he has a tough time interacting with others. he feels awkward in social situations
the type to go to a party and spend the whole time petting the cat in the corner (he would not go to the party in the first place tho lmao)
he’s not misunderstood tho, he just can’t socialize and doesn’t really want to
grabs the end of your shirt in an awkward situation (its kinda cute)
takes time to open up, but when he falls for you, his love is so strong, it’s almost overwhelming. so just accept him, alright?
shittiest sleep schedule known to man, like srsly, what is bro doing
this man’s brain probs short circuits every 5 minutes LMFAO go to bed you idiot
really good with his words, very convincing
loves cats
hidden piercings
careful and patient
is really good at taking care of others (but he would only wanna take care of you) you’ll let him, won’t you?
startles easily lol
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elf oc
ditzy and kind (to you)
bit of a mean streak (not to you!) 
wants to appear princely in front of you
kinda stupid (a farce but not completely lol)
has a bit of a temper, but nothing too bad
clingy and cunning yandere
two faced
struggles with empathy (he tries, he’s not human, what’s he supposed to do!)
extroverted (?)
he’s really lonely
when he met you for the first time he was absolutely fascinated as he’s never interacted with a human being before!
BLUNT. he’s not used to convos… just give him some time!
at first it was simple curiosity, but that curiosity turned into something… deeper
he was completely alone before this, but now you’re here, and you’re going to stay, right? 
is obsessed with the idea of you staying here with him forever, so why do you keep talking about going home? can’t you stay here? 
but then you bring up the idea of him coming with you, well why didn’t you say that earlier! he's happy to come with you
It takes him some time to grasp certain concepts so please be patient with him, he’s not used to humans
he’s paranoid and hostile to other humans. it’s not fair, he wants all of your attention, so why is everyone trying to take you from him? he doesn’t like that everyone is getting in his way… 
he’s terrified of bugs. will scream incredibly loudly if he sees one lol
he pulled you through a mirror, that’s how you ended up in his land
so if you wanna go back, just ask and he’ll take you! 
gives you jewelry, expensive jewelry. (maybe he’s slipped on a ring before. haha. jk… unless..?)
prefers to stay inside your place because he really doesn’t like people who aren’t you lmao
don’t stray too far from him, okay? he’s always waiting for you
rowan (who i don't have a new drawing of rn </3 sorry!):
he absolutely hates not being a priority, so please don’t ignore him. please? he just wants you to love him.
clingy, devoted, and obsessive yandere
if you don’t reciprocate he might (unknowingly) try to guilt you into liking him back. will appear like a kicked puppy to really sell it (but it’s not an act lol he’s just like this)
at least his intentions are pure! (?????????) but is that better..?
if when (it will happen) you two end up together, he’ll give you the world if you’d asked for it
used to cut his own hair! :D (not great at it tho tbh)
very attentive and will work hard to keep you happy! just don’t forget that you’ll love only each other for the rest of your life. please don’t leave.
has tripped over nothing, will definitely happen again
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here's the shitty relationship chart that i rushed </3 its very ugly im sorry HAHA
i really want to clarify that NONE of them will ever hurt you physically on purpose (they might have to pay up for emotional damages tho. they have your best interest in mind ig)
also i would say that they all share some traits like being clingy, devoted, possessive, obsessive, jealous, protective, and loyal. but if i specifically wrote it, it's probs just a bit more intense... just a bit,,, haha...
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nakedmonkey · 2 days ago
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I'm gonna say something about Gavin Newsom, since at the moment he's being passed around the internet like jack antanoff at a Grammy's after party. He's probably going to run for president in the near future, and he's probably going to win.
The narrative around this dude right now is, he's trying to protect the state, wow he loves his constituents so much, he cares about lgbtq issues etc etc., but I'm gonna BEG you to look at the people passing around this info. it's mostly white Californians, and it's mostly rich white Californians. POC in California are struggling. Unhoused people are struggling. Music venues and sports stadiums are being built in low-income neighborhoods primarily populated by brown and black folks, which means they are being pushed out. It's happened before. Neighborhoods in LA like Echo park and Silverlake, formerly largely inahabited by Mexican and Black residents, are maybe 90% rich hipster transplants now. It's happening to Frogtown, Boyle Heights, Korea Town, and slowly but surely, the san fernando valley, which was not very long ago, the most uncool place to live in LA, according to many many people. Gavin Newsom has gone out of his way to displace entire communities of unhoused people with infamous "sweeps". He has been on a rampage since it was announced the olympics would take place here. Unhoused people have been pushed out of "up and coming" neighborhoods, and into the deep valley. The LAPD is in local news CONSTANTLY because they've murdered some poor innocent person, and yet their funding gets more and more generous every year. San Francisco is basically unaffordable...
I guess it's early to start thinking about it, but maybe you should look into him and how the way he's been running things is affecting non-white, non-industry, non-rich people in the state of california. Also maybe look into the 1976 Chowchilla kidnapping because his relatives were involved and you should have a clear idea of the privilege he comes from and so we're all prepared to make demands for those who are often overlooked and who need the most help.
I guess I'm also saying that this trend of turning politicians into memes and social media stars is fucking weird, dangerous, and counterproductive. These people literally have our lives in their hands and we forget we call the shots. Research your local politicians and make sure they're doing their job right, ask what their plans are for the next administration, ask how they're gonna do right by you and your neighbors.
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cybertron-smash-or-pass · 2 months ago
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I need tfa shockwave to become bloated and to make him gain weight. Imagining him moping and eating energon ice cream
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I can totally imagine him spending those 50 years stranded with Autobots, under the impression that Megatron's dead, overeating to get through the grief and try to keep himself sane.
I'm not personally all that into sad weight gain myself, but the idea of characters feeling guilty or conflicted about it has always kind of struck a chord with me. Whenever I think about shockwave stuffing or weight gain stuff, it's usually in the context of when he first starts climbing the ranks and gets access to better and more decadent fuel with higher pay and with him getting invited to Upper Class Social Functions™️.
On the one hand it's Good Fucking Energon, better than anything he's ever been able to get when they knew he was a warframe, not before the war (lower class, not financially secure enough to blow that much on fancy fuel), not during (gotta ration this stuff), not after (the cons had been just barely scraping by on the outskirts of the galaxy, the energon's mid at best). Its a chance to enjoy something he's been denied all his life. On the other hand he is filled with so much fucking rage that the Autobots bask in luxury while he and his kind have been left with the scraps, and something about indulging in that same luxury while it's kept so exclusive feels like a betrayal of his people and his principles.
Buuuuuut principles and rationality can only hold up for so long against the desire for a Little Treat. Or two. Or seven. Or, uh.... He lost count. Dammit...
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mellotronmkll · 2 days ago
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i love apollo 18 but i have a few problems with it and one of the biggest ones is that i can never just listen to the fucking album because its impossible for me to hear this song without repeating it at least like 4 or 5 times
#I think in some ways this is literally like the best song he's ever written <- not a hot take at all i know but man#it really is like it kind of perfectly encapsulates everything i love about his songwriting at least lyrically#okay musically its amazing too i like the way it goes to the bVI in the verse he does this thing a lot in his chord progressions where the#verse chords are usually straight forward some variation in like I IV V I maybe with a ii an vi nothing too crazy and then he puts in#something like that or like often it's a II that is at this pivotal moment and its like idk like . he usually shows restraint like that in#the verse and chorus and then does something really complex/interesting in the bridge#not always but theres a lot of songs like that in this case oh my god i love that bridge#hes got the ascending line cliche thing and it keeps climbing and climbing towards the climax of the last verse and its sooooo GOOOOOOOOD#and its got suchhhh a classic linnellian melody insanely catchy like this is just such a perfect fucking song#i just feel like this is like. the archetypical john linnell song. platonic ideal of a john linnell penned pop song perfect example#lyrically obviously too its just soooo him nobody else could have written it. okay he got the title from flans though credit where its due#but yeah. perfect pop song lyrically complex and clever funny and recursive and circular and dark and morbid and just like. its so. perfect#ALSO THE ARRANGEMENT....................... i love the organ on it so much i love the guitars i love the way its mixed#yeah anyway if i wrote a song like this. id retire afterwards . he says hes still chasing trying to write the perfect pop song but i think#this would be my contender for like. number 1#anyway i love this song but EVERYONE loves this fucking song so i forget how much i love this song sometimes. but i love it#this also was my favorite they might be giants song as a kid mostly because i really liked hearing him swear . lol#but because of that like birdhouse im like ive probably heard this song more than most any other song in my life so thats a factor
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pantestudines · 1 year ago
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having a "former gifted kid" type mental spiral
#i say this because the spiral is actually about how much i hate the word and the general culture around giftedness#mostly because its incredibly inconsistent between schools so people often mean different things when they say it#but also because in my specific case its certainly not a gift but like. what am i supposed to call it.#its literally a neurodivergence in my case that has had many effect postive and negative on my life. but its also a school club.#and its also nothing! before the advent of like modern standardized public education i wouldve just been a curious kid#Without modern public education im not sure i wouldve even been different from other kids. maybe a little socially awkward still but idk#and like. Am i really different from other kids? am I now as an adult different from my peers? Occasionally i will get told as such#how the fuck am i suppose to talk about how much being seperated from my peers and held to higher standards sucked#when the name of the reason why this happened might as well be 'gods specialist little boy'#none of the things that make people think im smarter are really all that useful day to day. and most non-gifted people are like. still smar#i happen to be good at memorizing the kind of facts schools test you on as children#but is that just because i was told as a kid to be good at school and so i tried hard to do that?#even if I am uniquely good at that#does that really make me more intelligent than the high school dropouts who can fix cars like its nothing?#in fact i would say they are at least wiser than me for picking something practical to be smart at#at my school being gifted usually implied you were a little neurodivergent and bad at socializing#often our gifted kids were actually failing classes because they were smart enough to realize they didnt matter#(not me but still)#but at some schools being gifted just means you were an avid reader or were pressured by your parents to maintain perfect As at all times#so if i say. wanted to talk about how being 'gifted' has often made some aspects of academia like hating emails and having time blindness#and not having a good friend network and having many unadressed issues around not really knowing how to make friends#if i wanted to talk about that. and i say 'I was gifted growing up and this sucked'#the person on the other end might hear 'oh woe is me im so smart and this makes my life so hard'#AND FURTHER STILL#on tumblr especially 'former gifted kid' has kindve become parlance for 'guy whining about nothing'#or even 'person who they were told was smart but is actually kinda dumb'#which... yeah! theres a reason many former gifted kids are like that! thats kindve my issue with the program in the first place!#it takes otherwise relatively normal if well achieving kids and tells them they are gods specialist little children.#THIS CANNOT BE HELPFUL TO ANYONE? like whatever chance the kids had at seeming normal has been stripped away#and they now also think they are the smartest person in the room in every situation
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medicinemane · 2 months ago
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I don't know, I get tired of a lot of positivity
Like yes yes, the world's wonderful and I'm so strong or whatever generic thing is being said (because it's always so generalized to the point of meaningless), but you know shit is what it is, and the only way forward is with changes I manage to make... which you're not helping with at all
And as for like... my internal mood, I'm deeply isolated, sorry if hollow platitudes don't sooth the gaping maw inside me
It is what it is, and I probably get my shit together enough to do stuff like teach out of my basement like I'd like, it's just I believe that I'll be alone in a crowd like I've always been
But positivity... I just... I kinda get sick of it. There's this guy on youtube I watch who talks about economics stuff, he's recently started doing positivity and... I just fucking know his personality enough where it's like sorry mate but I'm not interested in hearing you spout Secret light kinds off drivel
...I don't know, I suppose it boils down to this
One, I can barely fucking take in positive things said directly to me, about me. Generalizations don't help even a little... I'm a mess, I'd really like someone to toss me a life preserver instead of always tossing confetti at me while I struggle to stay afloat... doesn't help
Two, the world is a terribly imperfect place, and rather than taking a mentality of "everything will work out", I think it's important to acknowledge that sometimes good people live alone, die alone, and they never got the break they needed and slowly bled out
I think it's worth knowing that if you can't step in and help yourself, then maybe no help'll come at all
...I don't know, I suppose in the end the core of what I'm saying is a lot of positivity seems like self help tier stuff and... I get tired of that, and I see so many good people struggling and... eh... either I can at least come in and say something positive custom fit to them, or I can keep my mouth shut
Just fucking let me rot. Help or let me fester on my own, you know?
I got rid of the trailer, I maybe did something like cleaning though I can't tell... at what point will my pace on trying to make things better be good enough for people, and I'll be able to stop having people tell me to fix my life... as if I hadn't thought of that already
...everyone means well, it's just tiring
#it's like when people make you being suicidally depressed about them#I... don't really want to say some more specific details cause they might be able to pick themselves out of a line up#but it's just like... man... is this more about trying to get me in a better place; or about making you feel better#wears me out#mm tag so i can find things later#just seems impossible for people to not offer advice on things#the thing people never think of with advice; is that people living a situation often have thought about that situation a whole lot#it's like why... with my friend that's looking for theatre jobs; I don't offer a lot of advice because I figure they've done quite a bit#just kinda... offer to help the best I can and ask what they need; and then mostly just listen#it's not like I never ever say anything; it's just I try to back up advice with something concrete#like... for instance if I wanted to suggest someone do therapy; then I'm gonna be offering to help them find a therapist as best I can#cause I get that it's not like you just 'go to therapy'... getting started on things is often the hardest part#eh... keeping this as vague as possible cause I want the actions I took not the details#but when I had a friend who was someone who didn't treat them at all well#I didn't directly try to get them to leave cause I know that... it's hard; they were in deep#instead I just made sure to validate their perception of reality a whole lot#counter the literal gaslighting by just pointing out that they made sense and questioning how reasonable their partner was#and then I attempted to get them in touch with some other people so they were less isolated and had other people to validate them#and thankfully they're not with that person anymore; they're doing a great job at life and are much healthier now#...but advice... honestly I don't think I gave them much#I more asked leading questions to try and shine a light on things; or would brainstorm about what to do with various stuff#they were real stuck; and it was painful to see them stuck in such a bad situation; but... better to sit with them than push push push#it felt like if I gave them my actual advice; dump that abusive freak; they couldn't have heard me#it was easy for me to tell them the solution; but that didn't account for all the barriers to implementing that solution#in this case; many of the barriers were internal; but internal or external; barriers are barriers#I don't know... I just think sometimes you gotta be comfortable sitting with discomfort along side someone#unless you got an actual fix; and you're willing to put in the work to fix it... shut up about fixing and just be there for them#mhh... we'll take one of the only things I'm actually capable of doing instead of something more serious#if someone wants a minecraft server; I can either fucking help them set it up; or I can kinda keep my mouth shut#if I'm not helping them set it up; I can give them shit like 'that sounds cool; I bet you could do it'
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sylveriasarcana · 3 months ago
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#hey dude. words are going better today#i'm trying to be more sincere about how i feel and not cover everything up with jokes#idk if you remember how often i do that. i hope you don't. i like to think you mostly remember me for my horror movie thing#there are things i wanted to tell you but i was too busy hiding all my emotions. anyway. you know now. i tell you all the time#like that friend I really like? the one you met last week?#i always get so sad when she talks badly about herself#and i never tell her that. i just fake laugh at her self deprecating jokes#i stopped doing that#it felt... really intense. more than it should have#i'm just so not used to doing that#she said “you can be a dick to me anytime man lmao i can take it”#and i just said “I could never be horrible to you.” and i wasn't covering it with a laugh or anything like i usually do#i don't know how she reacted because i wasn't looking at her#but i said something that i really meant. no bullshit#the rush was fucking incredible#and i did it again today#she was saying how she was shit at something and i just said. i didn't agree that she was shit at things#i don't think she sees me as anything other than a friend but#i'd still like her to see the real me. not the bullshitter that turns everything into a big joke#i don't know many people i want to be real with. it never feels safe#i want to hold onto this one#i like being myself with her#anyway sorry if tonight's movie wasn't up your street. especially since it was an audio commentary#or maybe it was? you loved behind the scenes stuff. just not sure how much you're into behind the scenes stuff for Saw#oh my god!!! i just remembered!!!!! we literally had a conversation about Saw when you were still here!!!!!!!#holy shit dude i continue to annoy you with my Saw agenda from beyond the grave#this is fucking hilarious#tw death#own post#big stupid crush
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autisticlee · 4 months ago
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I don't understand why so many religious weirdos claim dinosaurs never existed and the bones/fossils dug out of the ground were buried under rock by scientists and then dug back out. it makes no sense at all. does their religion book tell them they were fake? is that what it is? because they seem to love letting some old mistranslated book dictate their entire life, thoughts, feelings, actions, etc. they even make up stuff the book supposedly says to excuse their behavior and justify horrible things, which makes them hypocrites for not actually following their book they claim tells them exactly how to live their lives that they must follow exactly or they will go to hell. but they sure like to pick and choose what they follow and make up new rules. but anyway, why do they hate dinosaurs lmao
#rhetorical question. i dont actually care about their weird excuses. i know its probably weird anti evolution nonsense again#it's more of a why do they have the audacity to hate and deny dinosaurs and make up such ridiculous nonsense thats more unbelievable!#also by “religious weirdos” i mean mostly christians. its where i mostly see/hear this rhetoric. and the christian umbrella is large#but im sure other non christian religions have some book they follow that says dinos are fake or something so its#about them too#lee rambles#religion#people can believe in religion all they want if they arent harming others or forcing it on others#but i also think they shouldnt be allowed to deny reality and truth. some of them believe absolute fantasy and deny reality. its sad#and they often are the ones forcing it on others and harming others. because theyre so removed from reality they think#reality is an attack on their beliefs and think their beliefs are their life so they think we are trying to take their lives???? idk#do your thing but stop denying reality even if it contradicts your religion stuff. learn the difference between metaphors for#your religion and reality. maybe the book is fantasy that tells you stories with a moral lesson and arent meant to be taken literally#maybe they were never meant to replace reality and be seen as a real thing that happened#but no one who follows religion closely wants to criticize it by questioning things with logic#i guess it doesnt help we are taught to NOT question things of you go to hell. but i questioned anyway because my life is alreadg hell#and im doing way better now that i realized reality is better than a religion about sky daddy and his magic son#and following some outdated book about stuff that doesnt translate well to english or reality.#i rather feel like everything has its own energy/soul and we are all connected to the earth energy and a part of it because it feels nice#but i dont have to deny reality and force thst on others. you can think or do a thing that makes you feel better#but do it without denying reality or treating science and facts like an enemy religion or an opponent to take down#ah i could go on but this is getting long and rambly and off topic from main original topic. have many feelings about this#im glad at least my shoer religious family arent dino deniers. i grew up loving dinos so much and they let me love them#super* what is shoer 🤣
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burningcomputerpersona · 7 months ago
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also how is it that spanish love songs has such good merch??? i don't think I've ever been to a show before where I had to struggle so hard to pick just one thing, like in a lot of cases there's only really one thing that appeals to me or I just get something bc i love the band and need to have them on me regardless of what the design looks like. but i was spending ages just staring at the merch stand trying to pick one out of alllll the things i wanted
#i got one shirt with 'stay alive out of spite' on the back and i love it#i thougt super long and hard about the brave faces everyone shirt because it is literally one of my favorite songs#but i decided not to go for it bc i have their baseball hat with the exact same words on it anyway#also they had this really awesome zip up hoodie that I was staring at for ages#but alas it was 60 bucks and i do not have that kind of money lol#at first i was looking through their merch like omg theres so much good stuff i need to get this shirt and that shirt and that hoodie and#then i saw the prices and remembered I'd probably have to narrow it down to just one shirt lol#I'm not actually really about it though i freaking love this shirt im actually wearing it right now lol#it's definitely gonna be one of my favorite shirts to wear#also i need to do a revamp of my wardrobe#all my tops are black band tees which is fine but most of them are from hot topic and of mostly big bands that i don't listen to super often#and like that was fine when i first got them#but it is not enough now i I need several shirts for the same bands that i am Obsessed with bc one shirt per band is not enough#i am a very normal person with very normal ideas about clothes and music and a very regular amount of interest in bands#anyway all this to say i might end up getting a bunch of sls merch anyway in the future#just so i can wear them while also listening to them which would be all the time#anyway i think this shirt is gonna be super good for my mental health bc every time i wear it im gonna be thinking of the lyrics on the back#also im definitely washing this (and my whole outfit) tomorrow morning so i can wear it again right away and show it off to everyone#if ur wondering about the washing part its bc i have a general routine when it comes to getting merch at shows#where i go to the merch stand right away so i can get a good size before its sold out#and i put it on over my t shirt so i don't have to worry about carrying it#and its also the outermost layer so the band gets to see me wearing it like hiii i love ur stuff so much i got it and wore it to see you#now this does have the unfortunate side effect of getting absolutely drenched in sweat after the show#one time i was wearing three shirts at once along with a hoodie tied to my waist bc i got a bunch of merch and it was sooo warm#i have no intentions of changing this routine though i like how efficient it is#oh also the shirt is green!! another thing that made me choose it over the others#i literally do not own any green shirts#so i am very happy that i have a very nice shirt that i like in a new color#mine#my shows
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starlostseungmin · 7 months ago
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husband!seungmin
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✰ notes: my brain is not working properly and idk if i could write any lengthy fics as of the moment but here’s husband seungmin because i’m bored and i love our puppy so much. not proofread. DO NOT FORGET TO REBLOG, COMMENT AND LEAVE TAGS! thank you <33
( seungmin )chan , lee know , jeongin , han , changbin , felix , hyunjin.
Husband Seungmin who cried when he saw you walking down the aisle with a big smile on his face thinking that he’s the luckiest man on earth to marry you. He couldn’t wait for the priest to finally announce you as husband and wife then kisses you in front of your friends and family. 
Husband Seungmin whose love language is act of service and words of affirmation with a little bit of gift-giving. 
Husband Seungmin who is still shy about engaging in physical touch. But when he does, he gets really clingy and refuses to let you go. You never complain. He also loves looking at you dreamingly while you sleepーwhispering how much he loves you and kisses your forehead before going to sleep, hugging you tightly. 
Husband Seungmin who cooks every morning before going to workーsometimes at nightーand holds your hand while brewing coffee as he steals kisses whenever you aren’t looking. 
Husband Seungmin who would take the day off from work just to stay home and take care of you when you’re sick. He won’t allow you to move and insist that he’ll do everything you ask for. 
Husband Seungmin who gets a bit possessive when someone who seems interested in you makes a conversation so he’d kiss your lips out of the blue and say, “We’re married.” then show off your wedding rings. 
Husband Seungmin who doesn’t pressure you to have kids with him since he respects whatever decision you make. It doesn’t matter anyway, as long as the two of you are together, that’s enough for him. 
Husband Seungmin who is still feeling nervous when he asks you out on a date. It would always feel like the first timeーhis heart racing, cheeks red as a tomato, the giddiness and sparks, everything goes in slow-motion. He would take you to your favorite places and have the best time. 
Husband Seungmin who loves tea time and is literally serving you hot gossip from workーlaughing at how everyone was so dumb and problematic in the industry. 
Husband Seungmin who used to prefer texts over calls but now he tends to call you often because he misses you. He would also wait for you to hang up first.
Husband Seungmin who would hug you tightly while kissing the crown of your head and whisper words that might comfort you when you’re breaking down and vulnerable in front of him. He would refuse to leave until you feel better. 
Husband Seungmin who makes weird noises and funny faces just to make you laugh. 
Husband Seungmin who acts like a puppy when he wants to be babied and asks for a kiss. 
Husband Seungmin who treats you like royalty. 
Husband Seungmin who gets over the moon when you surprise him with lots of (useful) Sanrio-related gifts. Mostly Pochacco and Pompompurin with a little bit of Cinnamon Roll. 
Husband Seungmin who loves to take A LOT of pictures of you with his phone or camera. You’d complain (playfully) about his storage getting full but he doesn’t mind because you are his muse. 
Husband Seungmin who brings you flowers on random days because they remind him of you. 
Husband Seungmin who kisses your lips intimately because he wants to. It could happen multiple times a day which could lead to something moreーmost of the time. 
Husband Seungmin who would walk away after an argument and come back hours later to apologize. 
Husband Seungmin who doesn’t want you to see him cry but gives in when you hug him. 
Husband Seungmin who gets brutally honest, cries over silly things, and does his little twerk when drunk but still cute as hell. 
Husband Seungmin who always scores 98-100 on coin karaoke and gets cocky. He knows you love listening to him when he sings and gladly does the favor when you ask him to—wherever, whenever. 
Husband Seungmin who is always good at everything. 
Husband Seungmin who doesn’t say “I love you,” most of the time but expresses it in different ways or says it with the things he feels about you. 
Husband Seungmin whose smile is the most precious in the world. You promised not to take it away and never make him cry. 
Husband Seungmin who loves you so much, makes you happy, never fails to make your heart beat, makes you feel loved and accepts you no matter what your flaws are. 
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✰ taglist: @notastraykid , @ameliesaysshoo , @l3visbby , @reignessance , @lix-ables , @skzfelixlove , @rachabreathing , @hyunverse , @minluvly , @sleepyleeji , @starseungs , @midsoulz , @oddracha , @armystay89
©️ 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍 , 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒.
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redr0sewrites · 6 months ago
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Viktor general romance hcs!
🥀A/n: HES SO POOKIE I LOVE HIM‼️
🥀Cw: fluff, smut, slight angst if u squint, switch!viktor
🥀minors dni with the nsfw portion
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sfw:
this man is such a workaholic, he genuinely never thought that he would fall in love
viktor is very inexperienced in the romance department, so he's definitely a little awkward at first
once he's close with someone, he definitely starts to open up to them a lot more! he'd really appreciate a partner that he can have deep, philosophical conversations with and definitely asks for your opinion on a lot of things
your a very valuable person in his life, and viktor makes sure that you know that. while he may not be great with words, his actions show that he truly cares for you
while he may not admit it, viktor loves when you complete acts of service for him or help him at all. he loves when you visit him in the lab and bring him some coffee, it always makes his day
because he works so much and spends so much time in the lab, viktor will often invite you to join him there. you two often spend hours together, just sitting in near-silence and working in tandem. viktor would love it if you got along well with jayce (and sky too but mostly jayce), you are his favorite people and he would love it if you all got along
viktor isn't the most cuddly person in the world, but he makes some exceptions for you! after a long day, he loves just melting into your embrace and having you play with his hair. viktor would spend hours just laying in your lap and rambling about hextech if he could
he's not big on pda, but he loves holding your hand. viktor holds your hand anywhere and everywhere, he always wants you as close to him as possible and he'll sometimes trace words into the back of your hand with his thumb when you are asleep. before he said "i love you" out loud, viktor probably traced it against your skin at least a million times.
viktor prefers to stay in for dates, and definitely enjoys staying up late with you. idk if they have television in the world of arcane, but it seems a little shocking that they can have giant magical teleportation portals and literal magic orbs and magic flying blimps and body enhancing drugs but haven't created a tv. so like. lets just pretend they do have television. cuz if they do, than you and viktor DEFINITELY have movie marathons and movie nights together
he loves making you little trinkets and gifts!!! whenever there is extra material leftover at the lab, viktor's first thought is to make something for you! he once made you an entire bouquet of fake flowers out of scrap metal, and told you that he would love you until the flowers withered (it would never wither cuz its made of metal ☹️). your home is practically overflowing with these little trinkets, but you REFUSE to get rid of any of them (i think i saw the flower scenario on a tiktok, but URGRHRHRH i wanna write it so... if anyone is interested... 😇)
honestly, the best time spent with viktor is in the comfort of your own home. you have a very domestic relationship, and he likes sitting with you in comfortable silence.
he'll call you pet names in zaun, even before you two are together😭
overall, viktor is genuinely such a sweetheart once he trusts you and will stay by your side no matter what
nsfw:
SWITCH LEANING SUB 🫵🫵🫵
because of his leg and overall sickness, viktor definitely prefers simpler positions that don't require a lot of physical stress
he likes having you on top of him so that he doesn't have to put pressure on his knee, and he definitely prefers not having to push himself too hard
i'd say his favorite positions would probably be you riding him, sitting on his face, lotus position, and maybe 69 or missionary too (but the last two are only on good days when he isn't in too much pain)
at first, viktor was insecure about sleeping with you because he genuinely does not think very highly of himself and didn't want you to think that he was weak or ugly :( please reassure him
ON THAT TOPIC!!! PRAISE!!!!!!
praise is literally SO important to him, while it is one of his kinks i genuinely think he appreciates it outside of the bedroom as well.
lots and lots of communication. "is this ok", "can i touch you here", type of stuff. he's very gentle with you, and obviously you are with him as well
because he wears his leg brace literally all the time, viktor has a handful of bruises and scars from the brace rubbing against his skin 24/7 (idk if he sleeps w it on tbh- im assuming not but u get the point) and he can be a little insecure about them. PLEASE kiss them and show his body a lot of affection in general
viktor isn't super vocal at first, but once he trusts you he lets out the neediest whines and moans. he curses a lot under his breath, and he has a verrryyyyy pretty fucked-out expression.
this man is a switch 100%. most of the time he subs and bottoms, but sometimes he'll dom from the bottom and very occasionally he'll dom from on top. when he's a sub i definitely see him as, like, the male version of a pillow princess. he definitely just wants to lay back and get taken care of, and will get very pouty if you do not do so. he loves being pampered and praised and he's SOOO sensitive when he's subbing. when he's in a more dominant mood, i see him getting off on your pleasure a lot more than his own. he loves fingering you, and definitely loves overstimulating you
viktor loves being marked and also marking you. he bites down on your shoulder a lot to muffle his moans, and he loves giving you hickeys. i genuinely think that's another one of his kinks as well
TOYS!!! im sorry but this man definitely has an extensive collection of sex toys you can't tell me im wrong bc im not. he isn't inexperienced by any means, but he probably got a lot of toys over the years because he just didn't really have that many partners and just wanted to try a bunch of things on his own yk? anyways, he fucking LOVES using them on you and teasing you mercilessly is definitely part of your guys' foreplay
this man has the most gorgeous hands and definitely puts them to good use‼️ you cannot tell me viktor does not have amazingly skilled hands bc your wrong. he literally does jayce told me
i don't think he's super vanilla but i also don't think he's into like SUPER hardcore bdsm? i think it would intrigue him but he's probably the type to be into what you are into and if you want to try something new, he's more than willing (as long as its safe. either of you getting seriously hurt is a major nono for him). that being said, i don't think he'd mind being handcuffed or experimenting a bit with shibari, but you guys DEFINITELY have a safeword. like even if you have 100% vanilla soft sex he still establishes a safeword with u and makes sure your comfortable.
overall, his kinks include: praise (giving and receiving), little bit of edging (receiving), overstimulation (only giving), marking, and kind of a wildcard but also maybe somnophilia. like he would NOT complain about waking up to head lmao- he's def the type to have wet dreams i want to write this omg
i am so! tired!!! still feeling very crappy but i am pushing through my classes until the end of the year 😭 i am so close and yet so far 🙂‍↕️
ANYWAYS HOPE U ENJOYED!!! FEEL FREE TO SEND IN ARCANE REQUESTS!!! ive also been on a huge jayce x viktor streak lately? im not usually a big shipper but their dynamic intrigues me. i want to put them in a jar together and shake them around a bit. but yea i love them both!!!
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uyuforu · 27 days ago
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Your Love Story based on your Juno Persona Chart
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All pictures were found on Pinterest
Other posts you could like:
જ⁀➴ Juno, Groom, Briede PC Observations I
જ⁀➴ Groom & Briede PC Observations III
જ⁀➴ Groom/ Briede/ Juno aspects in Natal Chart
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READINGS BOOKING OPEN
email adress: [email protected]
Soft To You presentation and Q&A ᡣ𐭩 rules ᡣ𐭩 private readings reviews
astrology menu ᡣ𐭩 tarot menu ᡣ𐭩 special astrology & tarot readings
support the creator: paypal ⟡ buy me a coffee (tip) ⟡ tipeee
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Why Juno Persona Chart?
‧₊˚✩彡 The Juno Persona Chart is a Persona Chart based on the asteroid Juno (3). This asteroid represents our destined love, our future spouse.
‧₊˚✩彡 In the Natal Chart, Juno usually represents our destined love and also FS, and how they play in our life. But sometimes, we just want to know more. In this case, our Juno Persona Chart will be calculated based on the position of Juno in our Natal Chart. And so our Juno PC will be our Juno in Natal Chart but in a more detailed Chart.
‧₊˚✩彡 In this case, we can literally know more with our Juno PC. The most famous signification of a Juno PC is to know more about your Future Spouse, mostly considered as our destined love.
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The two sides of Juno Persona Chart
‧₊˚✩彡 As I said, Juno PC will usually say about our Future Spouse, but, as it represents our destined love, this can actually also represent the way we are going to be with our Future Spouse.
‧₊˚✩彡 Of course, this post will be based on my personal observations with people around me. But this is still a theory, and something im still studying.
‧₊˚✩彡 But in most of cases, Juno PC actually express the love story between you and your FS as well. It's going to give you hint about where you will meet and what could happen, and how you will come to Union with your FS.
This post is a theory mostly, and observations based. If the theory happens to be verified often, I'll post a more detailed post with signs, houses and degrees.
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╰┈➤ Get your own Juno/ Groom/ Briede Persona Chart, from 20€ to 60€ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪
‧₊˚✩彡 Sun in the Juno PC could represent your first impression of your Future Spouse.
‧₊˚ Examples ‧₊˚
✩ Sun 1H: You could have love at first sight for your FS. You could find them very handsome/ pretty when you first see them. You could also find them very passionate, extrovert. ✩ Sun 9H: You could find your FS really smart when you first meet. You could look at them as older than you, or as a mentor, or they could be in an upper position for you if you work or in school. They could have a lot to teach you, and you could admire them somehow. They could also be a foreigner, and you could see them this way. ✩ Sun 4H: Sun here could mean you could feel like your FS is familiar, or they could feel like your home. You could eventually live with your FS. You could think your FS reminds you of a sibling or of a parent, you could also feel incredibly safe with your FS. ✩ Sun 10H: In this position, you could think your FS is someone you respect a lot, someone who works hard, you could also see them as a coworker, or someone well known around you. Your FS could also have a position well know or respected in society, for example, they can be married, so everyone knows their marital status. ✩ Sun 5H: You will feel like your FS is very fun, someone you will have so much fun and laugh with, you'll love their presence, you'll feel like it's easy to feel good with them. You could feel like they are quite popular, and flirty, there is something about them that just draws you to them. You feel like life is good with them, and you may want to spend a lot of time with them.
‧₊˚✩彡 Chiron 4H could mean you'll have a lot of troubles or arguments with your family because of your relationship with your FS. Or at least, there will be a problem with your relationship and your family.
‧₊˚✩彡 It's true that your Rising Sign will tell how you will meet them. It can tell the place but also the circumstances. Ruler of your Rising can say more (Sign & House of the ruler).
‧₊˚ Examples ‧₊˚
✩ Sagittarius Rising: You could meet them in college, or when you are in college. You could also meet them in school or when learning something. My Uncle has this placement, he met his FS when both of them were in College. The Ruler of the Rising is Jupiter, and it falls in the 2H in Aquarius. His FS was one of my mother's best friend, and she become close to their family and he met her in his family. The 2H represents family, and Aquarius represents friendship. ✩ Aquarius Rising: You can meet them online, one dating app, on the internet, you can receive a DM from them. You can meet them in foreign lands, in an airport, or with friends, because of friends. ✩ Virgo Rising: You can meet them at work, while working, they can be a coworker, your boss, or someone you meet at work, so could even be a client. You could meet during a random day, or when taking care of your health. ✩ Gemini Rising: You could meet them online, at school, college, when learning something, library, with friends, in a social circle, in your neighborhood, because of your family, because of your siblings, at a concert, etc.
‧₊˚✩彡 The degree on your Rising can also add details on this first meeting.
‧₊˚✩彡 Uranus can represent what will change in your life after meeting your FS.
‧₊˚ Examples ‧₊˚
✩ Uranus 4H: You could see the idea of family different after meeting your FS, or your idea of home could change. You could also have to change your family situation after meeting your FS, or your home situation. ✩ Uranus 5H: You could change your point of view about children after meeting your FS, you could also change your love life's situation after meeting them. You could end a relationship after meeting them, or you could want to be more serious. Or if you aren't dating anyone, you could want to become more romantic. ✩ Uranus 8H: Your idea of intimacy can change after meeting your FS. You could have had the idea that no one could enter in that zone before, and after meeting them, you could def feel like finally you met someone who understands on another level, and you want to make them enter in your secret world. You could finally see love in sex, without thinking of the act itself. You could want to share secrets with them. ✩ Uranus 12H: You could have a spiritual awakening after meeting your FS, or your beliefs could change after meeting them. You could feel like a cycle ended, and you can also feel more lonely after meeting them, feeling like you are very much attached to them already.
‧₊˚✩彡 Saturn could represent the possible obstacle between you and your FS.
‧₊˚ Examples ‧₊˚
✩ Saturn 5H: If you have children already, you could think this would be a complicated situation, or you could have difficulties to conceive when you meet them. You could also not want children, or you could be too childish when you meet them. One of you could already be in a relationship when you meet. ✩ Saturn 2H: Your ethic could go against this relationship, your values, etc. You could also think one person in the connection doesn't have enough money, or money could be a problem. There is a problem of stability here. You could think one of you is also not stable in their life to be together. This could also translates to not being the right moment when you meet. ✩ Saturn 10H: You could have a reputation problem when you meet your FS, you could been seen in a certain way that doesn't go well with your relationship. You could also be too busy with work. You could feel like your relationships is complicated due to your position in society or at work. You could also have a certain reputation around you that can makes things harder for your FS and you.
‧₊˚✩彡 Union in Scorpio/ 8H could mean you'll be in a secret relationship first.
‧₊˚✩彡 Mars 3H means eventually you'll have miscommunication problems.
‧₊˚✩彡 Mars Aries can mean arguments or fights, or you'll feel angry because of this connection (house could say why).
‧₊˚✩彡 Uranus conjunct Neptune could mean some illusions you had about your life before could suddenly change when you'll meet your FS.
‧₊˚✩彡 Angles seem to be quite important about your first meetings. It can represents different point of view. I'm not exactly sure of what is what right now.
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‧₊˚✩彡 Jupiter could represent what you will gain from this relationship.
‧₊˚ Examples ‧₊˚
✩ Jupiter 2H: You could gain a lot of stability from your relationship with your FS, you could gain money too, success, you could feel prettier or more good looking when being with them. You could gain status, possessions, wealth. This can be a sign of a long term relationship here. ✩ Jupiter 6H: You could gain stability, you could care more about your health, mental health as well. You can feel safe with your FS, you can also be more serious in general in your life. You could become more busy, but you could just be more responsible. This can be a sign of a long term relationship as well.
‧₊˚✩彡 Venus or Juno conjunct North Node there could mean meeting your FS will both help you fulfill your purpose, and this could be destiny.
‧₊˚✩彡 8H Venus could mean you'll have a secret crush, or you'll be secretly in love, trying to hide your feelings to this person.
‧₊˚✩彡 9H/ 12H stelliums can mean most of your story can happen in foreign lands.
‧₊˚✩彡 4H/ 6H stelliums can mean you'll feel the most comfortable with this person, you'll never want to leave their side.
‧₊˚✩彡 Groom/ Briede in this chart can tell us what each person of the couples do when you meet each other.
For example, I have Briede 12H in this chart, and I traveled when I met my FS. My Briede conjunct my Uranus and we met online first. My Groom is in my 7H, and ruler of the 7H is in 9H, my FS traveled as well in the same place to attend a wedding.
‧₊˚✩彡 Sun can also give us more hints about how you meet, sign and house of course.
‧₊˚✩彡 Juno on the contrary can tell us how you begin your romantic relationship.
‧₊˚✩彡 Juno conjunct Pluto can mean you'll take a long time, or longer than what you thought, to enter in a relationship.
‧₊˚✩彡 Juno conjunct/ sextile/ trine Jupiter can mean you'll recognize your FS as your future spouse when you'll meet. You'll sense or just totally know you'll marry them even on the 1st meeting.
‧₊˚✩彡 Venus could say what are your feelings towards your FS when you meet them, or what you like about them when you meet.
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actiniumwrites · 26 days ago
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the perfect pair [part two]
synopsis: their reaction to finding out you have a tcg card of them
characters: scaramouche, alhaitham, arlecchino, childe, and kinich x gn!reader (separately)
warnings: mostly fluff with like a pinch of angst in alhaitham’s. i also didn’t proofread these :(
notes: part one got so much love and so many of you asked me to make a part two with more characters so here you guys go <3
part one
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Scaramouche:
Scaramouche sees it one day while you’re both cleaning up your shared house and you accidentally knocked over your deck, scattering the cards on the floor
The card you have of him just so happens to end up right next to his foot
He’s only ever heard of TCG in passing from other people or when Cyno was talking about it back in the tournament ages ago, but he never really cared to look into what it was
He’s immensely confused because what the fuck is his face doing on a playing card
You embarrassedly try to explain it to him, but he just glares at it for a second before raising his brows and looking at you
“This is really weird,” he says bluntly and flips it over in his hands while mumbling to himself, “at least they made me look cool.”
You just snatch it back from him and scoff as you put it away in your deck holder, explaining that you were going to show it to him later
“Yeah, whatever, I better be the strongest card in there.”
Alhaitham:
Very unamused
Although he plays with you and the rest of the group, it isn’t very often and he doesn’t care about it as much as the rest of you do
You pull it out from behind your back one day as you’re both walking home from the Akademiya
“Surprise! Look what I got, isn’t it so cool?” you beam at him, shoving the card in his face
He takes the card from your hand, his reaction not changing from his normal face as he does. He inspects it before giving it back to you, “Seriously? You got a card of me?”
It upsets you because you were really happy and it took nearly a month for the guy to make it for you
So the literal second your face falls and you start to get embarrassed, he backtracks completely
“No, it’s fine. I think it’s really cool,” Alhaitham says almost instantly.
And he isn’t lying either. Is it a little cheesy? Yes. However, Alhaitham secretly does like that you have it and care so much about him that you want to have him in your playing deck
So he grabs your hand and holds it tightly in his, knowing he now has another way of subtly bragging to everyone that he’s dating you
Arlecchino:
“I’m afraid I don’t understand,” she’ll say when you pull out the card to show her, “What is this? A children’s game? Did one of the children put you up to this?”
You take the card back from across the table and pout at her, “No, it’s mine. I got it because we’re dating and I wanted to have a card of you.”
Arlecchino never really understood the point of games, no less TCG of all things. So she’s understandably confused when you start talking about it
It takes you rambling about the games rules and all the little details for her to finally believe that it really wasn’t one of the kids trying to pull a prank on her or something
And she finds it endearing in a way, although she doesn’t let you know that
You notice her looking a little lost and slide the card under the table and back into the rest of the deck sitting in your hands, “Sorry, I can get rid of it if you want.”
“No, there’s no need for that. I think it’s..cute.”
Kinich:
In the nicest way possible, he doesn’t really care
You show him immediately when you get it and Mualani and Kachina totally freak out
“No way! Do they have other ones too?” they’re both more excited than he is and ask if there were any of them since they were made after the competition
Don’t get me wrong though, it isn’t that he doesn’t care, but more specifically, he doesn’t really care about the card
He’s more happy to see that you’re excited about it and that makes his heart swell
And if Ajaw tries to say anything about it, well he wouldn’t even get the chance too because Kinich doesn’t want your moment being spoiled
He’s also very secretly a little giddy over the fact that you love him so much you want to have a card of him
Childe:
The biggest tease ever
Like he literally will never let it go once he finds the card left out on your dinner table from when you were playing with a friend the night before
“Oh wow, you have a card of me? That’s so adorable. I hope you’re destroying all your enemies with my card,” he’ll say arrogantly.
Unimpressed, you take the card from his hands while he’s laughing and shove it back in the deck
“No,” you scoff and decide to tease him back, “you normally die first, matter of fact. I’ve actually been meaning to find a replacement card.”
His jaw drops and he looks at you with the biggest pout, “Hey! That’s not very nice. Who would you even replace me with anyway? There’s no way there’s a stronger card out there than me.”
“Believe me, I could definitely find one,” you smirk at him and wait as he begins to nearly throw a fit. When he really starts to believe you, you laugh and hug him tightly, “Ha! you should’ve seen your face! I’m only joking, you know. Your card is my favorite.”
He stares down at you with his blue eyes and presses a kiss to your lips, “Yeah, that’s more like it.”
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astrobydalia · 1 month ago
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Numerology observations
I've genuinely learned a lot from @novy2sirius when it comes to numerology so much so that it has helped me make so much sense out of many experience in my life. Therefore I wanted to share some numerology observations with all of you.
astrobydalia
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People with 9 energy are so deceitful, they are easily seen as innocent. On the contrary people can see 9s as someone pretty suspicious because they have an air of mystery to them and are the kind of person who you think you know but actually you don't like at all. They always hide the most BIZARRE shit, I'm telling you their life is SO weird. This is how I see 9 people tbh lmao
I've never met a 11 life path person that was emotionally okay, but the weird thing is that they tend to want to lie to themselves and pretend they are okay all the time. All the ones that've met had diagnosed depression and spent big chunks of their lives in very VERY low lows like it's truly hard to watch. Also, random note but I've seen that they are secretly very resentful too and have a hard time letting go of things and moving on. Most of the 11 people I've met had Earth Moon or strong Saturn influence in their moon
Also, I met a 11 guy once who would often say "I have no doubt in my mind that I will be famous" lol (11 is rated to fame)
22 is a more chill number. I've seen more developed 22s than developed 11s. 22 people are very mature and level-headed, tend to have very balanced mindset for most things. However they tend to think they're the only ones who know best, they give good advice but suck at taking any.
So one of the things Novy said is that the date you meet someone in will be a significant energy in the relationship you have with them. Every person I've met on a 5 day are people I travel a lot with or people I've had long-distance relationships with (5 is related travel)
I don't have much experience with 2 energy but from what I've seen it is pretty mellow energy. The people with 2 energy are pretty harmless individuals even when they have other intense energies going on
I get along with 7 life path people cause I'm a 5 but something I've noticed about these people is that they really do struggle making genuine connections "from the heart" if that makes sense. They always rationalize getting in and out of a relationship giving more importance to practical/beneficial reasons rather than emotional ones. When they do try to follow their heart they fail miserably cause they confuse making decisions from their heart with total recklessness
Life path 1 people are so.... immature. And have very obvious anger issues. They have the patience and emotional regulation of a toddler, really do embody the Aries stereotype. At their worst they can be pretty intolerant towards other's pov. Yeah life path 1 is very passionate and driven and all and I do get along with them but I also tend to keep at arms length a little cause they're energy is very chaotic and destructive tbh
Let me tell you too that unhealthy life path 1 people are one of the most CRUEL and mean people I've ever seen like... it's giving blood lust (not literally but you know what I mean)
Life path 6 can indeed be caring and generous but I've met a lot of them who are actually very selfish, greedy and materialistic. It's like they see life mostly through the lens of material gain. They literally remind me of this clip fr.
I have good experience with 6 people tho. My manager for example is a 6 life path and I literally don't know what I'd do without him, he's so patient, always there when I need him and is always on my side even when I mess up. 6 people are also very good at setting healthy boundaries too
A lot of the life path 6 I've met had taurus placements or where earth doms astrologically
The number I struggle getting along with the most is 4 tbh. They are huge party poppers even when they're healthy and have more need for control than 8s imo. A lot of 4 people I know are the type to rain on your parade for no reason in the name of being "realistic" but really they're just being bitter imo. I know 4 people have a hard life but I've noticed they tend to often have this attitude of "if I couldn't be happy then you can't either"
What I've noticed with 8 people is that yes they can be controlling but it's not like they go around policing others like 4s do. 8s control in a very subtle and indirect way, it really reminds me a lot of scorpio energy/8th house placements. It's more like they keep in control in any situation by staying low-key and are the kind of people that is hard to knock down, yet they know how to get under other's skin
I'd describe 8s as more domineering. They can be pretty chill, fun and won't mess with anyone as long as they feel like they have the upper hand in situations. That's why they are stubborn af and refuse to be wrong and why they do not react well AT ALL to animosity. This also means that at their worst tend to have HUGE superiority complex and will minimize others and be condescending just to feel superior
One time I witnessed an argument between a 1 and an 8 (it was messy) and even tho the 8 person was wrong imo they made the 1 person back down eventually (which, if you know how 1s are, that's a huge thing) and from that experience I learned that you're better off disagreeing with a 1 than disagreeing with an 8
People with 3 energy have such a refreshing energy I love them!!!! The type to keep a young spirit regardless of their age but like in a good way. Their sense of hope and optimism can't be crushed, all the ones I've met were the kind of people who always knew how to bounce back from difficult situations.
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astrobydalia
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