#i like that you think im positive cause id say im

[doctorwhoisadhd]

there's a certain quality the harmonies of like... early to mid 2000s alt rock has. which i am obsessed with... like i wanna do that. i NEED to figure out how to write harmonies that sound like that

[pintrestgrl]

hii bby💓 im so glad we became mutuals because you are my first mutual🥹

could i request kook!reader x rafe where reader always likes to talk right before the go to bed like for (ex. they could be laying in bed cuddled up trying to fall asleep but reader just talks about literally anything) thats how i was when i was a child id stay over my grandmas and just talk her head off at night😭

yesss ofc i’m exactly like this 😭 i cannot handle the silence omg

but omg i’m so glad too 🥹 ily ily and im honored to be ur first mutual 💕💘💞💖💓💝

also imagine this w like season4!rafe too. this was also not proofread and was a bit rushed.. tbh

okk anyways enjoy !!

bf!rafe cameron with sweetheart!kook!reader.

you had probably the longest day of your life today. rafe, too. you both had spent all day together, shopping on the mainland.

he had been following you around in every shop, watching you try on your every item with a smile on his face.

he paid for everything too, not really bothering to glance at the total of your many items.

he just wanted you to be happy. and he’d do his best job to make sure it was because of him.

but now, you had returned back to his house.

you both had a quickie quick shower together, and brushed your teeth.

it was safe to say, you both were exhausted. neither of you should have any trouble sleeping tonight, right?

wrong.

he had you laid up against his bare chest, your whole body smelling like vanilla lotion, and a hand resting against your back.

the only problem was that, you would not stop talking.

he thought you would pass out the second you entered the white sheets, but clearly you proved him wrong.

you were just constantly spewing out millions of random sentences.

“do you love me?”

“today was fun.”

“ooo, i wanna show my sister everything i got today!”

“do you think i’d survive in a zombie apocalypse?”

“what’s your favorite color?”

“my feet hurt.”

“my lotion smells good.”

“i hope my hair air dries good.”

“what’s your favorite animal?”

if he didn’t know you that well, he’d think you were joking with the way you were obnoxiously speaking right now.

he tried to ignore it and just drift to sleep, but he physically couldn’t keep his mouth shut anymore.

he spoke.

“okay, stop. yes to all your questions, now go to bed. please. okay?”

you frowned, a small pout forming on your pretty lips. you let out a small huff, rolling your body off of his and causing your back to face him.

he smirked, scoffing. his hand snaked to your waist, stroking the skin there as he spoke.

“no— baby, i didn’t mean it like that. c’mon, i’m sorry. okay?”

you didn’t answer him, opting for just staring at the wall in front of you.

he didn’t want you to be mad at him, that really was his last intention. he just wanted you to get some good rest.

he sighed, giving up. before he decided to fully pull your waist towards his body, him laughing as you tried to fight the smile coming to your face.

he turned your body over onto your back, hovering over you and planting multiple kisses on your face.

he spoke, finally pulling away from your skin.

“there. are you happy?”

you tried to contain the soft smile coming to your lips, but you couldn’t. you giggled, as his large hands stroked the skin of your hip.

you spoke.

“yeah, sure. maybe. whatever.”

he smirked, before speaking back to you.

“good. now cmon, go to bed. please?”

you nodded, going back to your original position of laying on top of his chest as he stroked your back.

you were finally quiet, finally resting. or so he thought.

he was about to succumb to a deep sleep, before he heard your soft voice whisper.

“do you love me?”

[sleepyangelkami]

Hello, I just wanted to say that I loved what you wrote about Dick Grayson, I hope you continue to write more about him, I love him so much.

CALLER ID d.grayson

 ☆ WORD COUNT - 3K

DICK GRAYSON X FEM!READER

 ☆ SUMMARY - when dick was on patrol, he got an unexpected message from you. however, no matter how hard you try to brush him off, your boyfriend always seems to know when there's a problem and what to do about it.

 ☆ WARNINGS - mentions of violence, jason's attitude problem, crying, reader has insomnia, petnames, use of 'good girl' (non-sexual), intended lower case, nothing i write is ever proofread 🩷

patrol was so slow tonight.

it was times like these where dick dazed off at something he couldn't quite make out, a far away building or even something in the sky. his thoughts drifted to you, his sweet girlfriend that had barely whined when he removed her arms from around him, stating that he just had to get to patrol. however, as soon as he was heading out the door, suited up, you'd rolled over and fell back to sleep.

dick loved everything about you, from your sweet personality down to the way you look in his shirts. and boy, did it take him a lot to be able to leave you alone when you looked so pretty in one of his white shirts.

he hadn't even realised that he'd been swinging his escrima sticks around, literally yawning while waiting for someone or something to come out. he was only itching for a fight. "chill out." came from the snappy jason who was leaning against the wall, a literal book in his hands. "you're gonna take someone's fuckin' eye out with that thing."

"are you reading, little wing?" a smirk quirked on his face even from behind the mask. he couldn't help but find it amusing that while waiting for someone to come along to bash their head into the concrete ground, jason had stopped for a little reading time.

but jason seemed in no mood for any games. "fuck off." it was apparent that he didn't want to be here from the start, grumpy as ever and losing enough sleep as it was but sheesh. dick had to roll his eyes, wondering if his brother should just get a lobotomy or something. he wondered if jason would be happier, less snippy. he wondered if jason would stare at him like a dead corpse walking, though he had to question was that better than the stinking attitude that he used now.

the sound of a ding! from his phone caused him to pull it out.

little love do you know what time you'll be home? read, just now.

dick glanced to the time on his phone, it read three thirty. one problem, you had work at six.

dickie!! i'm not sure darling everything okay? read, just now.

with nervousness seeping into his veins, he watched as your text message bubbles appeared, disappeared, appeared again, disappeared again and finally appeared again.

little love im okay be safe, love you read, just now.

but for dick, that simply wasn't enough.

he glanced to jason who didn't so much as look up from the cream coloured pages.

then, dick glanced out to the open streets of gotham, filled with... nothingness. it was one of those nights where nothing happened and they sat positioned on the rooftop of the tallest building in all of gotham. i mean, nothing had happened all night so surely, jason would be fine on his own, right?

before thinking, dick's fingers were pressing against the screen, typing up your contact and then pressing the phone to his ear. this caught jason's attention however dick merely walked further away so that he wouldn't be able to hear their conversation. although, he didn't seem too interested, rolling his eyes, presumedly of the fact that he was merely jealous that grayson had love and he was stuck reading a romance book, then looking back down at the pages and flicking one over.

it wasn't until the fourth ring that he heard the echo from your side. "hey, baby." he muttered tiredly, just knowing you were there was a kind of relief.

"hi." he heard your voice through the phone but you didn't seem as chirpy as normal. if anything, there was a slight sniffle to your tone, as though you'd been crying.

it didn't take a vigilante to figure that much out. he assumed that was why you'd taken so long to answer, trying to stop yourself from sounding all sniffly. but even if you had, dick still knew you better than anyone else in gotham. "it's late." he spoke, kicking a pebble against the ground. "why're you up?"

then he heard it, those dreadful two words that had you tearing up at the mere thought of it. "can't sleep." and dick knew that it wasn't just the type of 'can't sleep' due to the fact that you were on your phone or too engrossed in a book or tv show. it was the type that screamed at him right in the face.

your insomnia.

dick had found out about your insomnia before you were even officially together. he remembered seeing you all down so much, eyes half lidded as you stared at the glass of water in front of you, looking at it as though it were a science experiment. at first, when you walked in looking like that he assumed it was because you were upset about something. and dick being the respectful gentleman that he was, he chose not to ask about it as he didn't see it fit to be his place. however, when you came rubbing your temple, placing your head on the table he soon realised it was much more than that.

the insomnia you suffered with was enough to bring you to tears, as it was now.

"oh, baby." his tone turned soft, ready to comfort. "have you tried the weighted blanket, hm?" that always seemed to help when he wasn't there to wrap you up.

unfortunately, you only made a displeased sound. "mmh, too warm." where dick was standing, the heavy breeze on his shoulders, he wished it was he that was too warm rather than the cold that enveloped him now.

either way, he still pitied you, cooing softly. "i'll be right there." he spoke through the phone but before you could protest, he was speaking again. "I love you."

he couldn't see you, but he could imagine the soft look coming over your features. "I love you too but―"

"see you soon, m'love."

and you were cut off.

he turned to jason who was still with his back against the wall, stupid book in his hands. "the missus alright?" he spoke boredly, still flicking the page as though he had no actual interest in dick's love life.

but dick knew better than that. as disinterested as he may have liked to look, dick knew he secretly liked you, and that was a fact. jason never liked the girls dick dated, never liked much to do with dick but you, he knew you were good for him. "yes but i have a favour." and by the time he was looking up from the book, dick was already giving him them big begging eyes.

he rolled his eyes, turning over the corner of the page. many believe that turning the corners is destroying them, jason would have to beg to differ, it was loving them. "what is it?"

"patrol is slow tonight."

"it is."

"do me this one favour, little wing, please?"

"say it."

"you really like destroying my pride, don't you?"

"It's a little entertaining, yes."

and so that was how the man had rid himself of the nightly patrol. dick didn't like asking for favours nor did he do it often. perhaps that was why jason had let him off so easily this time. or perhaps it was because he knew that dick would soon owe him the same favour in response. 

whatever the case, dick still found himself jogging down the street, your guys’ shared home on wide display. he couldn’t help but smile at the mere sight of it. thinking about it just made his heart swell, you and him, in your very own home. dick didn’t particularly believe in fairytales but if he did, this was sure to be one of them.

he pushed open the front door, taking in the silence that hung heavy in the house but the various lights that you’d left on, a god awful habit. usually, he’d great you with that funny, playful “honey, i’m home!” holding his jacket and bag out, waiting for you to come running into his arms, wrapping your legs around him and holding onto him as though you would never let him go on patrol again.

sometimes, he wished he could give you that.

it was no surprise that you were innocent to the world. you hadn’t seen nor faced the dangers he had, you hadn’t looked death in the eye like him. and for that, he was glad. your soul was too pretty to get scarred. 

instead of the usual playfulness, he merely mulled his bag over towards the living room door, deciding to leave it there until morning. It was filled with his nightwing costume along with his weapons and so on. but dick didn’t believe in carrying that around you. more often than not, he’d leave it somewhere along the door so that he could hide it in the back of his wardrobe when you were busy.

of course, you knew he was nightwing but that didn’t mean he wanted to toss around that danger around you.

he shuffled the shoes off of his feet, now clad in a grey hoodie along with a black sweatpants. the person he was when he wasn’t dressing as a bird.

he was careful not to make too much noise along the stairs to scare you but enough that you could hear he was home, so you were prepared to face him. “baby?” he called out after making the stairs creak, just so you didn’t fear it was someone else out there and not your beloved boyfriend.

instead of a response, he heard a sniffle coming from the bedroom. 

peeling the door open, he stuck his head inside, fluffy black hair peeking in to see you sat atop the bed, grey sheets surrounding you as you sniffled, pathetically. but it didn’t make dick judgemental, when had dick ever been judgemental towards you? instead, his features turned soft.

“hey, hey.” barely in the door and he was already soothing you, though would he really have it any other way? “wh’s the matter?” though he already knew the matter, however that didn’t stop him from sitting himself on the bed, allowing you to wrap your legs around him, sitting atop his lap.

the temperature of the house and the hot skin of your legs was enough to tell him why you’d been so warm.

instead of responding, you sniffled and cried like the crybaby you were. but that was okay, dick didn’t mind having you as his personal crybaby as long as it was he who was wiping away your tears. 

his nose nudged your cheek, attempting to see your face but you only shoved it further into the crook of his neck, not truthfully wanting to face him though how badly you ached for his comfort. “c’mon, lemme see my pretty girl, hm? wanna see your pretty face.” 

the way his hands felt against your waist and your thighs, soothing the plush skin as if trying to coax you to look at him. and it worked, the tenderness that he used and the way everything seemed so… possible. you finally managed to pull your tear-stained face from the crook of his neck, looking at him with that pretty pout of yours.

and didn’t his heart just melt?

even when you were full of tears with a large pout implanted on your mouth, you were still the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. his thumbs were already making a move to soothe your under eyes, wiping away your pretty tears, like diamonds down your cheeks. “there she is, atta girl.” the way he praised you was enough to have your cheeks turning pink, even in your state. 

dick always knew how to fix every problem. 

he was like bob the builder only he was repairing your damaged feelings and little broken heart.

but as much as dick loved taking care of you, his heart did break a little at your tears. your cheeks were passed stained, tears collecting in your under eyes and trickling down your cheeks, softly yet the sniffles still emitted from you. you were his girl, he’d do just about anything to please you and truthfully, seeing you hurt… hurt.

“tell me what i can do.” he whispered against the warm air of the room. he wanted to fix this, he wanted to make sure you slept well but most importantly, he wanted to make sure you didn’t have to cry like this again. “did you take the melatonin?” you nodded your head. “will i make you some tea? run you a bath?” 

you’d been to hundreds of sleep specialists, doctors, so on.

everyone always gave you in around the same ideas. they’d tell you to work out before you went to bed but that was the thing they didn’t understand, it wasn’t because you weren’t physically tired that you couldn’t sleep, you were exhausted. yet it was your mind that couldn’t seem to rest. they’d tell you drink some camomile tea and you’d be on the mend, that was seven years ago.

you sniffled, looking at the one thing that had ever made it easy for you to sleep.

him. 

“jus’ want you.” you mumbled out, thinking you sounded rather selfish. I mean, would anyone disagree? it was unlikely. you’d pulled your boyfriend out of patrol in the middle of the night just so he could help you sleep. you felt downright awful.

but dick? no, his heart was only melting right in front of you, as though you’d just told him that you were adopting a bunny and naming it after him (that’d given you an idea for later). “I’m right here, honey.” he pulled you back towards him again, his hands rubbing up and down your back ever so gently, enough to have you turning to putty at the feeling of his finger tips. 

you sniffled, eventually pulling away and using your arm to wipe your face. “what time is it?” you questioned, now realising that you hadn’t so much as glanced towards a clock in… you weren’t sure how long, you kind of needed a clock to tell those kinds of things. 

his fingers were gently tracing across the softness of your cheek, brushing the loose strands of your hair behind your ear, like they did in those romantic movies. “‘s almost four, m’love.” 

you practically whined at that. “i have work soon.” in approximately two hours. you contemplated not sleeping at all. but you knew that whenever you did that, you surely regretted it sooner rather than later and you’d be taking naps anywhere, through paperwork and in one of those little uncomfortable office chairs.

dick wouldn’t have it. “you’re not going.” he stated briskly to which your brows furrowed. “angel, i’m not leaving you leave the house like this, alright? we both know i make more than enough to support us both until our old age and i know you want to work, that’s okay, but i’m not going to have you breaking your back for minimum wage, got it?” 

slowly, you nodded your head with your teeth wrapping over your bottom lip. “got it.” you mumbled, all flustered.

dick couldn’t help but grin. “good girl.” he then tapped the inside of your thigh. “come on, into bed.” 

and how could you refuse when he spoke to you in that tone that told you whatever he said, goes. whether he was telling you to get outside right now and fly a kite or suggesting bungee jumping in the morning, what did it matter? 

you nodded your head before climbing into the dark grey sheets. you and dick took turns picking the sheets. on his weeks, he’d choose those grey, dark coloured sheets, sometimes black, rarely blues. you always went with pale pink ones or those pretty white ones with little flowers, hearts or so on engraved in it.

you were sure that any pattern on white made your heart just swell.

dick climbed into the bed after you, switching off the lamp light on his way and laying across the comfortable mattress. he helped you move so that your head was positioned on his chest, listening to his lulling breaths and heartbeats, slowly rising and falling as your head moved along with it.

“I dragged you out of patrol.” you mumbled into the dark only moments after the light had been switched off.

dick brushed you off, though he knew that the worry could eat you from the inside and out, like a worm with an apple, rotting it the entire way through, never knowing when to stop. he never blamed you, of course, but sometimes he did curse that beautiful, intricate mind of yours, hoping one day it would decide to treat you a little better. “it was a slow night.” 

you could invision jason all alone, though when you tried to imagine it all you could think of was him either flirting or doing some kind of a ‘dirty talk’ with the enemy, unintentionally of course. everything he said had sort of a flirty tone to it, even with a blood covered face and uttering a death threat, perhaps it was because he’d still somehow manage to slip a petname in. “i’m sor―”

but before you could get the sentence out, his arms were wrapping around your own. “shh, shh.” mumbling as he shook you gently, as though you were a baby. “don’t apologise, princess.” 

you found yourself sighing, snuggling yourself into him as your eyes began to droop, feeling awful heavy, with a yawn, your mouth parted. “you know, i’ve been to so many doctors…” your voice extra low as he could tell the tiredness was taking over your feeble body. “‘n they give me the… worst ideas ever. one of them even told me i should get a treadmill and put it in my room.” he huffed out an airy chuckle. “think i finally found the medicine.” 

his brows furrowed. if you’d had a medicine, how come you weren’t taking it? how come you still lay awake at night when he wasn’t there? “what’s that?” 

poor, oblivious, stupid dick. 

“you.” 

main masterlist/dick's masterlist

[mangosrar]

call it what you want pt2

matt sturniolo x fem reader.

pt1

"i mean come on y/n, its a perfect chance for you to get back at your parents and a perfect chance for matt to get back at jess, how could you say no" nick stated.

"fuck no, jess can eat shit, and besides, id rather die lonely than have to ever be close to that loser" you replied, walking into the kitchen, with matt, nick and now chris who had walked in on you and matt screaming at each other just a few minutes before.

"shes right matt jess can eat shit" chris added, causing matt to glare at him and roll his eyes.

jess was matts bitchy, stuck up, brat of a girlfriend, well ex-girlfriend of 4 months. they had broken up about a month ago when she came to matt and told him she wasnt in the right place for a boyfriend, then posted a photo of her kissing jason atkins on her Instagram story. you honestly found the whole thing hilarious; she was some blonde bimbo who thought the sun shone out of her ass, and matt was the complete opposite, he was grumpy and dark, but someone how they ended up together.

"y/n your childish side is showing, i mean please do not fucking flatter yourself, i would rather gouge my own eyeballs out than have anyone think im with you, but i want my girlfriend back, i miss her" matt said, running a hand through his hair, leaning against the counter opposite you.

"aw are you gonna cry matty?" you mocked with a fake sad expression.

"y/n" nick said flatly. "you need this, come on" he continued.

you sighed, trying to really think this out. nick was right, but you also werent sure he would be so happy with this whole situation by the time you murdered his brother. there was a pause for a moment, all three of them staring at you, waiting for you to give in before you spoke up.

"how would it even work?" you asked.

"we post together, tell people were together, go to parties and shit with each other but in private i wanna stay as far away from your annoying ass as i can." matt said shrugging his shoulders while looking at you.

"what about school dumbass?" chris added.

"the same i guess, but dont be all up on me in the hallways i dont wanna be that annoying couple" matt grimaced.

"you and jess were that annoying couple, always making out in front of everyone and shit its gross, so just make sure you swap saliva in private" nick said, jabbing his hand out in front of him as he spoke to get his point across.

"this conversation is giving me literal back ache, im dipping, just figure it out and dont kill each other while you're at it." chris sighed, standing up and walking away.

"me too, just...no mean words towards each other, you're dating now remember" nick pleaded.

"no promises" matt muttered, watching nick walk out of the room, leaving you and matt in awkward silence.

neither of you really wanted to do this, but it was ideal, it was just annoying that you had to be so fucking rude and stubborn and attractive and smell so good. and it was infuriating that matt had to be so mean and punchable, and so sexy with a face that was so sittable. the two of you really couldnt resist stand eachother.

neither of you wanted to make eye contact, both just looking around before you broke the silence.

"do you really wanna do this?" you asked.

"no but its my only option" matt replied, still staring at you, sitting on the counter, from his position, leaning on the opposite side.

"so were really doing this?" you stated.

"i guess we are" he whispered, looking down at his feet.

"no kissing or anything though" you squinted at him. matt just hung his head and laughed before pushing himself off the counter and sauntering towards you, stopping when your knees met his stomach.

matt placed his hands on the counter, next to each one of your thighs and leaned his face closer to yours, making you suck in a breath from the closeness. "why baby? scared you'll like it?"

you couldnt deny the insatiable heat that was now blooming between your legs, he smelt so goo, his eyes looked hungry and the heat radiating off of his body onto yours made you dizzy. you swallowed thickly, desperately trying to regain your composure. there was no way in hell that he was going to get you that easily.

"i dont know where that mouth has been baby" you replied with a sickly-sweet smile, before pushing him back by his shoulders and hopping off the counter, making quick progress out of the kitchen and as far away from him as possible.

you heard him chuckle before he shouted.

"see you on Monday girlfriend" you could hear the smirk in his voice, and it only made you wanna turn around and slap the shit out of him more, but you just rolled your eyes and continued your decent from the kitchen.

god this was going to be torture.

——————————————————————————

taglist: @christinarowie332 @biimpanicking @chrisenthusiast @st4rswrld @mattslolita @flowerxbunnie @lovingsturniolo @its-jennarose @ermdontmindthisaccount @secret-sturniolo @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @justaslvttygirl @urfavstromboli @recklesssturniolo @delimeats-000 @gloomymatt @gwenlore @nickdevora @sturnioloenthusiast @savageking3 @iloveneilperry @ifilwtmfc @savageking3 @iammattsturniolo @sturniolos4lifee @honestlybabymiracle

[slxtarchive]

𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐞 ✦ 𝐬𝐚𝐦 𝐠𝐨𝐥𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐡

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬. where sam was there to help y/n when she had a rough day and resorted to unwinding in a not-so-healthy way.

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭. okay so i was just thinking for a sam golbach fic reader relapses (self harm) cuz their mind has been getting too much lately, and maybe sam helps them clean up and then helps take care of them and makes them feel loved nd just like lets them know that they don't need to do that because he's there from now on?? if that makes sense. also maybe not an established romantic relationship but maybe it ends up that way? like sam tells reader he doesn't know what he'd do with himself if anything happened to them he just cares a lot about them and yeah

𝐰𝐚𝐫���𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬. ANGST ! third person pov, talks of self harm, relapsing, descriptive literature, friend!sam, friends to lovers.

𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬. if anybody needs anyone to talk to i’m here! 🤍 sorry this took so long to post & write! this one hit really personal for me but id okay to say ive healed & im continuing to heal from my past. if anyone is going through similar hardships, you can get through it! i believe, love, & support you always.

y/n told herself she wouldn’t put herself in this position again. she wouldn’t.. but sometimes things don’t go as planned.

she had tried to stay strong, to stop letting her mind control every action she took; it just became too much. she sat on the cold tile floor of her bathroom, tears making their way down her flushed face. she gripped the item as she took the first swipe, lightly but firm enough.

just stop. she told herself. her hand shook as she went to repeat the action. she looked at her skin i just need to feel something, she thought. something other than what im feeling now.

she had been doing so good but somehow found herself back at square one. all that work that she had done was all gone. she felt hopeless, as if this never ending black hole of despair would stay with her for the rest of her life.

she took a minute to think on her life and what could have went wrong to cause her to relapse. all those thoughts had no specific effect on relapsing, its just her brain had begun to spin a web that caused her to get stuck in her head all day. what else can i do? she thought as she took another swipe at her skin. she planned on continuing until she heard her bedroom door open.

her heart dropped to her ass. “y/n..?” the voice had confusion laced in their voice.

sam.

it was sam.

the blonde boy was one of the things that y/n had in her life that truly made her happy. he was her best friend. she never told him that but she truly meant that with every fiber of her being.

y/n quickly wiped her tears when she heard the footsteps come closer to the bathroom. wiping the tears would make the tear stains disappear but the thing about breaking down, you’re left with that struggle of trying to catch your breath.

she couldn’t stop gasping, trying to breathe calm and collectively. that’s why as sam stopped right beside the bathroom. he heard a small gasp escape her lips that caught his attention.

his eyebrows raised in confusion. he put his head beside the door trying to hear something else. “uh.. y/n? you in there?” he knocked. he received no answer. multiple questions and thoughts ran through his mind before he opened the door.

sam had seen many things in his life, traumatic even, but this — it was like his heart had jumped, dropped, did a tumble, and self destructed all in the span of 3 seconds. he instantly became nauseous at the sight of y/n holding a blade to her forearm. the small cuts that had caught his eye before she covered her arm and hid the blade had his blood run cold.!

the second y/n had been caught she felt guilty and embarrassed. she felt pathetic, like she wasn’t strong enough to handle the hard reality of the real world. immediately, she stood up and faced sam. “i-im sorry you weren’t supposed to see that.. it’s not what it looks like.” she sniffled trying to contain her tears. “i… it just, lately everything has been so crazy and i haven’t … i haven’t done this in a while but… but everything has just been… too much.” she rambled out, trying to explain herself.

sam’s face of confusion faltered. he thought about her words. the way she mentioned in a while had him wondering what caused her to relapse and fall back into this situation. he scanned her face. she’s too pure to be suffering like this. he paused thinking of what to say but truly all that he wanted to do was give her a hug. so that’s what he did.

he pulled her in, wrapping his arms around her protectively. she melted into his touch. her lip quivered as she wrapped her own arms around him. her body shook as more tears cascaded down her face.

sam felt his own eyes sting with tears. “i’m sorry.” he choked up. “i’m sorry you’ve been going through all of this alone.” he rested his cheek on her head closing his eyes trying to stay strong for her.

y/n hasn’t said anything, still feeling guilty. sam pulled away and looked down at the floor seeing the blade and a tissue beside it. he picked them up and threw both away.

he turned back to y/n who had a tired look on her face. “as long as i’m here nothing will hurt you, okay? i will be here for you. you can depend on me. you don’t need to do this anymore to yourself y/n, i won’t let you.” he took her face into his hands. “i promise, i love you and im always here for you no matter what.”

y/n’s heart raced as sam’s words really effected her. she nodded pursing her lips and biting her cheek.

he brought her head to his mouth and pressed a light kiss on her forehead. “i mean it y/n. i don’t know what i’d do with myself without you. you complete me.”

y/n’s eyes scanned sam’s face noticing how his own eyes began to water and become puffy. the scene before her causing her throat to close. “m’sorry i promise i wont do it anymore. i love you sam and… fuck — i know i shouldn’t be doing that. i just didn’t know what else to do.” she leaned against his chest.

“i know, i know baby but from now on you can talk to me about it. about anything. i care so much about you. you truly have no idea how much i…” he stopped himself not wanting to overwhelm her. “just know you mean the world to me. you are and have been my priority since we met and that’s never going to change.” the reassuring words causing y/n to relax.

y/n started to get inside her head, wondering what if he got tired of her, if he’d leave her, what she’d do or how she’d feel if that happened — or even worse; if she would be a burden to sam.

sam noticed y/n zoning out. “hey, tell me what you’re thinking please.” his hands reached down to grab her own.

she took a deep breath. c’mon y/n. she blinked a couple times trying to sort her thoughts. “don’t wanna be a burden to you.” she admitted to which sam immediately shook his head.

sam brought her hands to his mouth kissing her knuckles. “you could never ever be a burden to me. you keep me pushing through every day because i want to be the best for you. to be the best friend you deserve and… and whatever the future may hold for us — i want you there always, okay? don’t ever forget that.”

his words wavered through the air and stood there so you could process what he truly meant. you thought on it, picking up some hidden message that you’d both communicate about later but as of now, he truly helped you feel understood and seen. as long as you had him you’d feel physically, mentally, and emotionally secure and protected.

© slxtarchive

[bratphilia]

would it be a bother to ask for a fic w a tomboy reader and william afton? ive been on such a kick w william afton x reader fics here since i watched the movie and i love all of them but i am not feminine in the slightest so if you could write one id be so grateful!! and age gap and size difference too would also be sooo 👌👌👌. thank you so much!!!

note ✧.*‎ this was a lil hard for me to write considering im on the girly-er side so if anything looks weird in relation to the premise i apologize in advance!! also so sorry for getting this out a lil later than promised.

pairing ✧.*‎ steve raglan / william afton x reader

cw ✧.*‎ age difference (reader is 18-21, william is 45-50), degrading, spanking, approximately two slaps to the face, blow jobs, rubbing through jeans? idk what to call that, coming in pants (fem)

taglist ✧.*‎ @dilfity

synopsis ✧.*‎ while attending yet another meeting with your career counsellor, he has a few choice of words for you.

jeans (w. afton x reader)

you sit in mr. raglan's office, trying to sit straight up, legs crossed, not bouncing. he slightly shifts in his chair as he reads your file, moving his spinning chair from side to side, as he mentally scrutinizes your report. it's nerve-wracking. anyone in your shoes would feel this way, but the way he's intently reading over every little detail makes you squirm.

the worst part is, this isn't even the first time you've been in this exact position. it wouldn't be so bad if mr. raglan wasn't such a hard ass on you. always practically demanding answers of why you keep getting let go from the jobs he gives you, criticizing the tiniest details. nothing gets passed this guy, and yet here you are.

(there's something that almost riles you up about the way he talks to you, though. he has a habit of talking with those big hands of his in a way that makes your insides twist.)

"so you sit here in front of me..." he pipes up suddenly, looking at you then lifting a brow, "wearing jeans to a meeting, for christ sake, asking for yet another job, so what? you can get 'let go' again?"

"well, yes," you say, a little dumbstruck at his comment on your attire.

mr. raglan laughs shortly. "i got news for you, kid. people with your kinda track record don't exactly find jobs as easy as you think they do."

you hold back from rolling your eyes. your fists clench at your side angrily. you speak through gritted teeth, "look, i just need a job. i'll take anything, i'm desperate."

"hate to break it to you, but things just don't work like that—"

you've had it. "will you just stop being such an asshole and give me my damn options already?! i didn't come here to be lectured."

you're seething, breathless from your outburst. your heart is pounding but nothing can beat the jaw-slacked look on his face. there's a deafening silence that has you on the edge of your seat. then, shortly, "you come here for advice, and i'm giving it to you."

you want to say something again, you open your mouth to do so, but he raises a hand to silence you promptly. "you said you're desperate, hm? want my real, useful advice?"

you stare at him, not liking the direction of this conversation or his weirdly tone of dripping malice. "get the fuck on your knees then."

it's hot, you'll admit it. and he's the whole package too, total dad-i'd-like-to-fuck and all. this isn't your type of deal, but if he's gonna offer it to you, fuck it, you'll take it. you'll take everything this man gives you. "mr. raglan—" you say, purposefully furrowing your brows, trying to act scandalized for godsake—

"get your ass over here," he scoffs with a roll of his eyes.

you shut up, perking up at that, and make way to the open space between his legs. "look at you, you degenerate thing. on your knees for such a cause."

your head swims and the buzzing between your thighs becomes far too apparent to be ignored. but you're willing to wait for that relief. you part your lips expectantly, hoping he'd get the message to undo his pants and he just laughs at you. "filthy fucking thing wants my cock in her mouth so bad."

"uh-huh," you say, mouth still open.

he does away with all the restraints and guides his cock into your mouth. eagerly, you take him and lick up the underside of his dick, eliciting a groan from him. he makes a fist around your hair and guides your mouth up and down his cock, not caring about what you can and can't take and you fucking love it.

the noises of him hitting your gag reflex is music to the mouth of your ears. the way you push him out only for him to slide back in is truly a marvel. and the grunts, groaning, and degradations that come from him makes you want to take him even faster, more than what your body can handle, and he just laughs it off, commenting on much of an "eager, filthy thing" you are.

when you feel his helping hands thrust your mouth more erratically is when he decides to pull you off. he uses your hair to stand you up and practically shove you against the desk, back facing towards him. you yelp in pain, only adding to the ache in your stomach. he stands to his full height and you gulp. fuck, he's so much bigger than you, of course he can just throw you around like that. when you ask him if you should remove your clothes, he pauses for a moment, thinking. then, mischievously, "no, i want to make good use of those jeans."

curiously, you look back at him, but his fingers are pressing against your clothed pussy. he presses hard, letting the fabric grind on you. "oh, fuck," you moan.

"yeah? you like that?" he asks gruffly, rubbing your clit through your pants from side to side. usually this stimulation wouldn't be enough, but fuck you were so hot for him that you didn't care. "fuckin' dressed like a boy," he scoffs.

tears burn in your eyes, partly from his words, the other part from the stimulation. then he slaps you across the face. "i asked you a fucking question."

"yes!" you cry, moving a hand to rub at your stinging cheek. he grabs your hand and then slaps the other side of your face, just for fun. a few tears slip down your face at his physicality, but doesn't change that fact that you, "love it so much!"

"think you deserve to come?" he asks. "after that shit you pulled. you think you deserve it?"

you sniffle, knowing damn well what his answer's going to be. "well, i don't."

he removes his hands then promptly wipes them on his pants. you sob out, grasping for his hands but he pushes off of you. "you better come back with a better attitude if you expect anything more than what i gave you."

[rdiowx]

Kinktober day one

Kidnapping with Gideon graves.

Warnings!: Kidnapping obviously, reluctant to needy reader, reader is kind of a whore, Gideon is unstable (as if he wasnt a Little already..) and literally obsessed with you, restraints, use of derogatory names, hickeys and bite marks, nipple sucking, yea dubcon

Readers gender or parts aren’t mentioned like at all.

Opening your eyes you were met with a concrete wall, a basement wall. Trying to stretch, you were stopped by the rough rope rubbing against your wrists and ankles. Trying not to freak out, but utterly failing when a slight startled noise left your mouth as the metal door opened. Your eyes needed adjusting to the bright light that flooded into the dark space, finally focusing you were met with none other than Gideon graves. “I see you’re awake, how’d you sleep?” He smirked slightly, it was a bit off putting of course not as off putting as the fact you were tied to a chair in his basement.

“What are you doing?” You spoke up suddenly as he made his way towards you, he couldn’t help but notice the crack in your voice. You struggled against the rope but to no avail, he just laughed at your stupid attempt. “Don’t worry about getting out of thoes, you won’t need to, not for what i have planned.” He whispered into your ear, causing you to jump at the sensation of his breath against your face. You could see his smile from the corner of your eye, the light bouncing off his glasses obscured his from your view.

It didn’t take long for you to end up on your face, cheek smashed against the cold concrete before your hands were restrained once again. You made a noise of disagreement as you felt his cold hands on the exposed part of your hips, your shirt having slid up from the movement in position. “Hey don’t worry, im gonna take really good care of you.” He reassured leaning over your form from behind,his hips pressing against you. You couldn’t even deny how turned on you were, having to stop yourself from whining from the lack of touch as he moved back and took his hands away.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You whimpered from your place on the ground, you could feel him remove your restraints from the bottom of the chair just to redo them. He chuckled grabbing your cheeks to face him before teasing you “don’t act like i can’t tell how turned on you are honey, you’ve been squirming so much id think you’re starting to like this..” you ripped your face out of his hand, refusing eye contact with him, cause you knew he was right. “Don’t get all shy on me now, it’s okay that you like this..just didn’t take you for a slut i guess.” He teased, leaning down to kiss your neck.

“Fuck you.” You spat, before getting your cheek smashed into the concrete floor again. “Honey im trying, but you can’t keep your slutty little mouth shut can you?” He spoke between clenched teeth, you tried to move away from him but he was too strong and you were still weak from having been knocked out. He used handcuffs instead of rope this thme so you couldn’t use your mouth to get the knot of the rope undone since your hands were in front of you once again. You didn’t have time to observe for much longer before you were flipped over on your back by Gideon’s hands on your hips. He sat up on his knees, he seemed to be admiring you. “I love the view but, i think it would be so much better if we got rid of thoes clothes don’t you think?”

“Don’t fucking touch me!” You yelled, scooting back only for Gideon to pull you back by your ankles. “Well, you can’t exactly do it yourself now can you?” He laughed at you as if you were the stupidest person alive. It didnt take him long to get rid of your shirt, your back now exposed against the cold concrete causing you to whimper at the feeling. You could tell Gideon wanted to say something. “If you have something to say spit it out.” You mumbled. Gideon laughed “i was gonna make fun of you for whimpering and i havent even touched you yet.” He said while making quick work of your pants, deciding to leave your underwear on for now.

“You’re such an asshole.” You complained, glaring at him from your spot on the ground. He grabbed your face pulling you up once again, squishing your cheeks together. “and you’re such a slut, arent you?” He growled pushing your head back. Before you knew it he was teasing your chest, catching you completely off guard causing you to let out a small whine. He smiled in response, playing with your nipples, you could tell he was set on making you squirm. Didn’t take him long to start trailing his hands down your sides, however you were starting to get impatient.

“God If You’re gonna fuck me just do it!” You moaned before he started teasing you through your underwear, making fun of how turned on you were to himself. “You know, for someone who didn’t want me to touch them you sure are impatient, or have i just gotten you that worked up?” He laughed and slipped his hand into your underwear causing you to groan. Considering your legs were still tied your pants just sat at your ankles, your underwear now joining them as Gideon got bored with teasing. You’re not sure when Gideons shirt came off let alone when he took his pants off but he was now almost in your situation, however what made him lucky in this is that he wasn’t tied up like you were.

“Don’t look so miserable i’ll make sure im inside of you soon.” He spoke, leaning between your thighs leaving bites on your chest. After a bit, Gideon looked as if he had the greatest idea in the world, you didnt have the chance to ask as he pulled you on his lap your legs behind him, your restraints and pants making it so you couldn’t get off if even you tried. “Jesus christ!” You exclaimed, a little relieved you couldn’t fall right now considering he decided to sit back up on the chair. Gideon wrapped his hands around your hips before moving them to grind against him pulling a groan out of him and a whine out of yourself. “You gonna make thoes slutty noises for me when im inside of you?” He whispered against your neck before leaving a mark there.

He moved his hips up to take his boxers off, his cock now against you making you squirm pulling a strangled noise out of him. You could tell he was getting impatient, especially as he shoved your hips down on his cock letting out a groan as you moaned rather loudly. You couldn’t help but start to move your hips as you grew impatient as well, hinting to Gideon that you wanted him to move. He simply groaned and grabbed your hips before moving them so his cock was sliding in and out of you. He pulled you into a kiss to swallow your noises before moving his face to your chest to suck marks into it, leaving teeth marks as he made his way down.

“Oh fuck, you feel so good, im never gonna let you leave me.” He whispered it didn’t sound very stable, like he was gonna flip you over and start fucking your brains out, but it just added to the arousal you were feeling. “Im gonna make you love me, and i won’t even have to brain wash you.” His voice getting lower as he went on. You put your palm over his mouth before speaking, “you- talk too damn much.” Your voice cracking after your first word. Gideon only rolled his eyes a bit but you could feel his smirk from behind your hand. You could feel his mouth open as you clenched around him and he let out a muffled whine as you did so.

“God You’re so much hotter when you dont talk.” You teased, grinding against him. He groaned before taking your wrists and moving your hand away from his mouth. He slid off the chair and laid you on your back and started to fuck you himself, your hands going to push against where your hips met, feeling the pressure of him speeding up inside of you. “God..You’re gonna cum soon, i can tell.” He was right, you were but you could barley form a sentence anymore to tell him. Cursing as he played with your chest once more causing you to get closer to your release. It didn’t take but a few more. thrusts for you to let go around him, the tightening causing him to pull out and cum on your stomach and chest.

“Jesus fuck…” Gideon panted, running a hand through his hair to get it out of his face. “You are never, ever leaving me.”

[istherewifiinhell]

scheduled hopefully for appropriate insanity causing hours

304 cant believe everyone in gin.tama just lives like this. the. speech convictions dramatic childhood flashbacks promises lifestyle. not just for main characters i guess (is this guy the shogun.....)

yay yay yippppppe the guys. yay ayay yippeee flashbacks. DONT DIE.

kaaaaaaruga. always suspected. if i understood her more id be obsessed. Confirmed. 2 second in pulling that. i was waiting for ur weakness bullshit. BEAT UP UR OLDER BROTHER. (<- comma. gay? ) kagura born on this planet.... half a second of taka.gin grappling could sustain me for a life time (gin puts his hands on him to throw him) hey fellas i know this is the Sword Penis show but have u considered going at it meg.op. style. for me?

omg baby flashback leftest infighting. sugi ur not the most oppressed person in the world u know. well u would say that scholarship baby zura. diddddddd they shape each others ideologies like that. where they reading theory together as shitty little kids -> well prob not this show but lets indulge

oh right gin former. ghost eating thing. showing up to the school yard beef with a real sword.

HI SHOU.YOU. HI. his little pogchamps

loveeee how they do the blood in this show looks like velvet, alll dark shimmery. also the editing. wooooo.

bushido speech. this shit is cool actually. also leon.ardo the ninja turtle would love it (03)

zura giving him fooooood oh no. little. verbal redirects of kindness transparency

NOOOO SUGI beats gin for the first time clip NO NONO SUGI LAUGHING SLOW MO CLIP (already tearing up)

ahhhh the position of the school and the attitudes of the backgrounder kids actually very affecting and interesting isnt it.... shou.youuuuuuuu the man(thing) that u are....

ep. 305

theeeeee babies. the babies.... the babiest guys. so so charmedddd by them charmeddd again by how. unexpected? maybe. sugi and zura stick together.... the remainers..... kidtoki why are uuuu such a perfectly cromulent. thing. little. video game character ass look. perfect. shitty cool affect. wanna pinch his little cheeks 10/10 letting this kid be the leader of the playground gang.

shou.youuuuuu shou.youuuuuu. such a. believably. man with his complexities but hes being around children so (friendly voice) 'thats right. what do you think' sooooo. yeah immediately believes 100 thousand percent he means everything he says so truly yeah i probably would get. horrible weird trauma give the givens too

THROW THE SWORDS AWAY YAYYYYYY. flashback. ohhhhhhh sugi. i little. weird bitch (said in. desperate scrambling fondness. i love the things that are wrong with him)

gin boots are so hot...

SOMEONE INTIMATE TO CUT AND CURSE!!!!!!! ohhhhh babes (what could i possible say abt it that hasnt been said) well i hope they fuck themselves to death about it

fightscene styles gt vs tf <- place holder i left for myself. that will be extricated to a diff post.

gin scrambling in the blood and dirt under all the promises he has given his loved one. YES BABE. thats exactly what ur supposed to be going

ohhhhhh godddddddd the fucking beheading scene back to back from both of their perspectives oh jesus fuck oh hell. im going to. cut and curse at someone else. i guess. THANKS HIM. THANKS HIM FOR IT. (crying) cool. thats normal. i feel normal about the man (shou.you)(gin)

what the fuck. oboro real? thats fucked up. THATS WHO TAKES THE EYE? (knew this techincally) WHO THE FUCK IS OBORO. (am seeing him) why is he a grown ass man i thought he was a kicked dog of a boy.

SUGI. SUGI YOU DUMB BITCH (loves him)(loves intractable positions)(loves the emotional incommunicability of reality)(loves an emotional confliction you can never resolve and just have to die about) he did it to save u fucking losers. cause his fucking teacher dad man asked him too. and thanked him for the service. ohhhhh u miserable fucks

why did you SAVE US. say it like that. damn.

oh youd do anything. youd kill shou.you. youd kill sugi himself. just to save the student your teacher loved. okay. okay. jesus. so you are the same. so your exactly the same person. your saying things that dont even make sense youve both lost any plane of reality cause you cant separate the things youve lost from the things you have. the very people youve saved are now reflected in those youve lost and youll both kill them to keep them alive. okay. no yeah thats fine cool lol.

(i guess sugis version would technically be said in reverse, you cant separate what youve have from what youve lost and the very person you lost are reflect in the one who saved you. and to keep him alive (crying gin.toki) youd kill him)

and MOST IMPORTANTLY. because you are the same person. you see yourself in him and him in yourself and u cant figure out where you end and he begins and your diametric opposed mirror reflection goals that lead you to taking. the exact same actions. okay. lol. OKAY. lol.

WHO THE FUCK IS OBORO. GET OUT OF HERE FREAK. i was talking.

id alt. im always saying this. or even just. Why is Oboro.

ep 306

heyyyyyy kagura! hiiiiii. youre not dead yay! hi. older brother. youre still here.

squints ohhhh these are. the cops? mayo man and. is this the other canonical gay sex haver or. (only has the normalest of second hand knowledge)

'if im just gonna end up as fertilizer anyway, i dont care if my path there is paved by roses or thorns.' damn dude. get out of the fucking. whatever ur in. and go become a metal music lyricist. what the fuck

oh shin.pachi. ur in this show.

googling. cant figure it out. whoever this green zombie bitch is sounds familiar. wish he had a name or smth.

damn there really is space in this show huh. thats crazy thats crazy. planet of the big hats vs planet of. umbrellas? anyone wanna watch space military anime.....

shogun 'i will protect the country were my friends live' what kagura said abt the planet. 'and to fulfill that goal, you'll even endure the deaths of your friends here?' gestures at the shou.you trolley problem. wow. that is tidy. good job recursive gin.tama

why do you grip that broken sword. you killed your teacher. you battled your friend. - my enemy is right here. WEVE NEVER CHANGED. weve all been fighting our own selves. ill stop him. even if it means having to kill him. but im also the one who understands how he feels better than anyone else

ohhhhhh gin. tama. ohhhhh gin. toki. i love u. i love u so much for just. saying insane thesis shit. like. yeah! YEAH OKAY! yeah thats. making out sloppy style with the narrative theming <- what do i mean by that.

be it killing him or protecting him. their both my job (gets so hard i pass out)

gin: says the most homoerotic twisted identity shit ive ever heard in my life that rests solely on. how unextractable gin. and sugi both are from each other due to. their love of shou.you. and thus. reflectionally. each other. oboro: his students are burning with hatred. <- IS HE STUPID?

and second question. upon reflection, looking at this grown ass man thing. do we have a classic ninja turtles adult beefing with teenagers situation. please tell me yes i will roast this man to shit.

(sugi also say gay twisted identity shit) [impact image font] we are. we are going to beat you to death.

[ending bumper comedy thing] u cannot deny their commitment to the bittism. need this shit for my annoying nitpick continuity fandoms. yeah no it was cause he pooped his pants. he shitted and farted.

[miiilowo]

i feel like theres not a lot of great resources out there so i figured id just ask -- how would you recommend ways of living with/helping out someone else with npd? :)

youre right! most of the time when u look up NPD stuff its "THE ABUSER DISORDER: KNOW HOW TO RECOGNIZE IT AND DISABLE NARC DEFENSES SO THEY CANT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU" which isnt. Great

all it really comes down to is listening to them n addressing their needs if they've communicated them to you. ill try to simplify it so i dont get too into details, though i will likely fail, and most of this advice will be based off my experiences, so idk how much itll apply to whoever ur talking about BUT:

generally (and w me especially) you can safely say that NPD mostly has to do with ego dysregulation. Our [as in myself and people w npd] mental health and general happiness tends to rely on how people perceive us, and if that perception is anything but positive, we feel like poopy doo doo dogshit. we kinda need to be paid attention to in a way that feels meaningful, yknow? compliment them, make sure theyre included in conversations (esp group ones), and try not to ignore em in any way. if youre talking to them and youre busy, for example, make sure you include that detail so they don't feel like youre brushing them aside. stuff like that. if they make art, and you genuinely like it, try going into detail as to why, whether its the colors or linework or what have you. if they write, tell them what you liked about the story or poem, etcetera. Tag them in stuff that reminds you of them if you have their socials, or send them things, show it to them, whatever.

lots of us tend to actually be very insecure, even if it doesn't seem that way, which might be important to keep in mind. sometimes we can get whats referred to as "narc crashes" (im not particularly a fan of the term narc, though theres nothing actually wrong with it, so ill just call it an NPD crash) where for whatever reason, we go from feeling great and secure in our egos and our stability and happiness and security to falling 600 feet down directly into hell no recovery absolutely awful 0% joy 0% light 100% agony. dogs with human teeth screaming at you and shit its really just no good. calling you a dunderhead

they usually (though not always!) come after a high where we feel fantastic, and most commonly the cause of a crash is we get hurt by someone, humiliated, or made to feel lesser in some significant way. for me, they're the worst when i no longer feel confident that people like me, and i become incredibly worried everybody secretly hates me. which is a very very very awful train of thought to be experiencing when you have the "EVERYBODY NEEDS TO LIKE ME NOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW" disorder. so if ur friend seems depressed or upset make sure to ask whats going on and bump up the praise and stuff up a notch. its the best way to recover for Me, at least. crashes dont have a consistent like. timeframe? i think it highly depends on the severity of what happened and whats being done to fix it, though im certainly no psychologist lmao

i feel like when folks w npd Are mean or unfair its because their needs arent being met, theyre doing awful, and they need support so they dont desperately lash out for it. god knows thats the case for me. thats another thing thats important to keep in mind i think

a lot of traits of NPD aren't pretty, and thats just a fact of the matter. its a disorder for a reason and all. even if we dont express the almost inherently negative traits all the time (usually because we are aware they are unfair to other people), its very likely that we are feeling them, and it does erode your brain after a while. The DSM-5 list of traits is probably the best way to go for this, as per this government website:

"A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and with lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood, as indicated by at least five of the following:

Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements, expects to be recognized as superior without actually completing the achievements)

Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, brilliance, beauty, or perfect love.

Believes that they are "special" and can only be understood by or should only associate with other special people (or institutions).[milo note: its hard for me to find something specific to make bold in this definition, but generally, i do not express that i think that i am better than other people even if i think it]

Requires excessive admiration.

Has a sense of entitlement, such as an unreasonable expectation of favorable treatment or compliance with his or her expectations.

Is exploitative and takes advantage of others to achieve their own ends.

Lacks empathy and is unwilling to identify with the needs of others.

Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of them.

Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors and attitudes."

Ive bolded the ones that would negatively affect people that, I, at least, try not to express but still feel, or feel the desire to do, near constantly.

As you can see, thats a pretty hefty chunk of them! I'm sure some people could take problem with every trait listed here, in which case they can suck my whole dick, but those are the ones I've noticed upset people the most, or make relationships the most difficult. I bring these up because if someone does express these, you need to keep in mind it is because of a personality disorder. That doesn't always make them acceptable, and if they are really upsetting, you should talk to them about it, but thats just like. basic relationship shit lmao. just try to be an eensy bit forgiving

Though the MAIN reason I wanted to bring up the traits is due to the 'entitlement/unreasonable expectation of favorable treatment/compliance' one. This can manifest in a whole lot of ways, but it is genuinely infuriating when someone ignores what i want them to do/what ive asked them to do/etc, especially if its for a reason that doesnt 'feel' solid enough, like them just not wanting to do it. it can be incredibly frustrating if someone with npd says they need something from you or want you to do xyz and it doesnt happen, so try your best to listen to them. if you cant do what they desire for whatever reason, make sure thats clear, and why. Most of us will recognize we're being unfair, but will still be mad; Just know its not because of you, its because of the disorder, and most people will not hold it against you because they're aware its unreasonable in some fashion.

i think thats like. the main things when it comes to meeting the needs of someone w NPD. to summarize and dumb it down:

make sure to compliment them in meaningful ways, especially when you really mean it

pay attention to them; try to prioritize them in conversation and such. it feels very nice. dont ignore them for the love of god

keep the crashes in mind, and try to uplift your friend as much as you can. reassure them you care about them, maybe not directly by saying "i care about you" but with your actions in general

listen to them and adapt to their needs as best as you can

remember that if they are being unpleasant its probably because of The Disorder and they are not doing well. dont let anyone be a prick to you but try to be kind. everybody goes through shit

if anyone has anything to add, or if you have any followup questions, feel free to ask ^_^ i very much didn't cover everything here, and again, this is mostly based off of my experience as someone w NPD, and everyone is different to some degree. The most important thing to do is ask about their needs, and try to adapt to them the best you can.

i think thats all i have to say for now tho so. sayanora. if i come up w anything else ill add it in an edit

[pr33tylul]

Can u do a Harry x reader where the reader is going through a hard pregnancy and harry is just the cutest person ever?

Sorry this took so long to post!!

Harry potter x pregnant!reader

Year: after the battle of hogwarts

Warninngs: none

Ps: taylor swift is bae

8 months along and my son was already causing trouble, Laying in bed while pregnant trying to get into a comfortable position was harder than it sounds. Tossing and turning constantly trying not to wake up my husband was also impossible. "Gosh, will you stop moving! All i wanna do is sleep!" I whisper shouted. "Whats wrong love?" Harry yawned facing me "Sorry for waking you, i just cant get comfortable" he sighed rubbing his eyes still clearly tired. He pulled me into his chest and lifted up my shirt, carefully rubbing my baby bump. "Better love?" He whispered in my ear as I relaxed. "Much better." I sighed falling asleep.

♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆

Waking up to mild pain in my lower belly, not having harry by my side I figured he let me sleep. "Ahh!" I held my stomach, now rubbing the tightened muscle in my lower belly. Harry rushed in right by my side "Everything okay?! Is the baby coming?!" He must of heard me cry out.

"Fine, just contractions" I start to breath in and out as he held my hand. "Did you want anything? you havent been resting like you should be" his face was filled with worry and concern "i cant rest, theres some stuff i need to do" I said pulling off the covers trying to stand up. "No i dont think so mrs potter, rest ill do all the things you need to do, now what things did you want me to get you?" I huffed as I layed back down. "Just get me some snacks and some coffee oh and the TV remote." Starting to get a little bit comfy, I might actually like this. "Okay, ill be a second" he kissed my lips and attempted to walk off. "No forget the snacks, i want you" I kissed him again pulling him forward. "As much as id like that theres stuff what needs to be done around the house and also teddy is downstairs so i cant leave him unoccupied. " he said kissing me again "oh okay" he smiled then before leaving he kissed my stomach.

*month later*

Now sitting in the hospital bed in labour was not fun at all. Hermione had packed me an already made bag with everything I would need and the baby. “You comfortable?” Harry tucked me in with the blanket. “Yes I’m comfortable stop panicking” i say a bit tired I would be pushing out a baby so I had to work up my strength. “If you feel any pain im here and just wake me up okay” nodding as I fall to sleep.

*The next day*

“Just one more big push! Mrs potter you can do it he’s almost out” the nurse said as I pushed. “Come in y/n, your doing so well” Harry held your hand tightly. Not even 10 seconds after the room was filled with little screams from your baby boy. The nurse checks if everything is ok with the baby. “. You have one healthy little baby boy, congratulations” the nurse smiled as Harry cut be cord, putting me in my arms so I can feed him. “Name of the baby?” The nurse looked at the both of you

“James. James Sirius potter” Harry said as he looked at you. “I love it, I think it’s a nice name” smiling through tears you look down at your baby. “I’m so proud of you”Harry kisses you lovingly. “Honestly I couldn’t of done it without you”

You both looked down at James, slightly he opened his eyes looking at his parents l. Both of you smiled as you covered him in kisses, letting Harry hold his son.

A/n

MERRY CHRISTMAS, I hope you lot had a fantastic day! Sorry that I’m a bit slow on posting! I’ll try fix that.

[k0yaz]

Alright, how about some DRV3 smut/light-fluff headcanons for Kaede, Miu, and Tsumugi (separately) having a mutual masturbation session with their male s/o

drv3 mutual masturbation hcs

Pairings: kaede akamatsu, miu iruma, tsumugi shirogane x male!reader

CW: nsfw, amab reader, mutual masturbation (OBVIOUSLY), miu iruma (yes, she is a content warning atp.), FREAKY ASS SHIIII, very heavy nsfw like very, inventions for horny purposes, passing out, praise

A/N: IM GONNA BE SO FR I WAS SCARED TO WRITE THIS BC I THOOGHT ID FUCK IT UP BUT IM NOT A PUSSY SO YAYAYSYS

At first, Kaede would be slightly nervous to indulge in something like this with you. Mostly embarrassed.

You’d have to reassure her that you wouldn’t judge and that the two of you were just experimenting. You let her know that she didn’t have to do this if she didn’t want. Eventually, she works up the courage to agree doing this with you.

During these sessions, Kaede enjoys it when the two of you face each other. There was something intimate about way both of you heaved heavy breaths while pleasuring yourselves. It usually brought the feeling that the two of you were doing this to each other instead.

Her breaths slow and labored as her hand dips between her parted thighs, circling her clit slowly. Kaede’s head is slightly tilted back as she squeezes her eyes shut, beads of sweat piling against her forehead.

If you gently gesture her to open her eyes, they’d soften slightly upon seeing your own heavy lidded expression as your hand pumped your cock.

Often times, her eyes would dart between your legs to help herself out.

She’s the type to ask you if the two of you could finish at the same time, holding herself back if you weren’t about to come just yet.

When you two are done, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE praise her and tell her she did good

Cuddle my sweet girl or smth please ‼️

On the other hand, Miu is absolutely bratty and insufferable during your sesh.

Constant. CONSTANT teasing when you bring it up.

Or maybe she’d bring it up first. This woman’s a freak fr so we’d never know who asked first.

Well obviously she’d agree almost immediately

Would definitely try and bring one of her inventions into bed. Probably an abnormally fast mechanical cockring to help you get off. Or maybe even an…oddly shaped vibrator (COUGH COUGH THAT ONE SPRITE OF HER.)

Once you two are finally in bed, Miu is absolutely a moaning mess, it almost sounds fake. She’d sneak glances at you as she’s fingers deep inside her own cunt, and snap at you if your eyes are closed—insisting that you have the honor of looking at her “goddess body.”

Any position is good with her, but on the condition that you have to have a perfect view of her legs parted and her sopping pussy.

She ends up bringing atleast one of her inventions regardless of what you say.

Definitely contemplating reaching over and jacking you off herself once you start getting tired, but held herself back.

Does not stop after just one orgasm. Makes you go for atleast 3-4 rounds of getting yourself off. This freak is drooling while you do this too.

After she’s done…you have to cuddle her cause she’s passed out from the fact that she brought her own demise with her inventions.

Miu is such an ass tho I love her sm

Surprisingly, Tsumugi is the most “unsure in how she’s doing” one?? Like more than Kaede- Okay that might have been a shitty headcanon but that’s how I feel so ha

I genuinely think this woman can’t do a full masturbation sesh yk? I’ll elaborate what that means later but she doesn’t hesitate or contemplate further on it when you ask. In fact, I feel like she COULD bring it up herself, but not likely.

Strangely enough, she’d sit between your legs facing away, so that her back is flush against your chest. It provides a strange sense of security to her.

She’d sigh softly as she noticed your hand stroking your own cock in the corner of her eye as she slipped her middle finger into her pussy, eyes heavy lidded and mouth hung open.

She would grind her hips back to meet yours, hoping for a feel of your dick as she fingered herself. You on the other hand can’t help yourself, and buck your hips forward as your hand works along your cock.

As your tip brushes against her back, she’d breathe out shakily out of enjoyment.

Remember when I said she couldn’t do a full masturbation sesh? Well that’s cause you two end up having full on sex. She ends up not being able to hold back and straddles your waist, slipping herself onto your cock.

After you two are done, she falls asleep on your chest, breathing ragged and uneven.

Hey bonus points if she keeps her glasses on lol

A/N: mr requester person don’t get mad if I admit this and I mean no shade towards the request but if I’m being fr I didn’t enjoy writing this request as much but I don’t hate it like I was okay with writing it but I didn’t enjoy it iykwim sorry 😞😞

But there’s nothing wrong with this req so no worries it just felt weird to write cause yk I’m a skittle squad member so writing for male reader especially smut is awkward 😭😭

OK HAVE A GOOD DAYYY HOPE U LIKED IT

[minheelovelee]

lovelovelove ur works ! would u mind doing a harua nsfw a-z? thank uuu

thank you for requesting!!!! 6 months later i actually wrote this piece… BUT. i wrote it yaaayyy. anon this gave me horrible horrible rua brain rot. i want a pretty boy with a little waist and long eyelashes. :(((

side note: i’m sooo so scared of switch/dom harua??? i’ve seen some discourse, but im not convinced. if anyone has anything to say about dom rua, id love to hear it :)))

harua nsfw a-z

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

- being dirty and sticky is a big no for rua. he likes to shower or take a bath after sex, no exceptions. wash his hair for him, please. he gets so clingy after sex. he likes to be babied, just for a little bit. </3

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

- he likes when his waist and tummy are touched. slipping your hands under his shirt is a guaranteed way to hear some of his pretty sounds.

- arms are kind of his thing. he likes to link arms throughout the day and grab onto your biceps when getting ridden. arms also give hugs. he likes hugs.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

- he cums so fast. he is so sensitive.

- usually he’ll finish on his tummy or chest. he doesn’t cum inside without a condom, but hates wearing condoms. :|

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

- he wants to get pegged. tied up and forced to take cock until he cries. :) he wouldn’t tell anyone that. obviously.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

- no experience. he’s a real virgin and doesn’t know what he’s doing. he just tries to go use on your reactions. what actions cause this. and what actions cause that.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

- cowgirl. he loves being ridden. especially if he can get tits in his mouth. he holds on really tight when u ride him, so it’s hard to move up and down. moving forward and back does the same for him. so sensitive :(((

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

- it took a while for him to warm up to sexual stuff. he liked to goof around at first, so he could get comfortable. now that he’s okay with different situations, he can focus more on the task at hand rather than his anxiety or awkwardness.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

- i think he shaves well. he leaves a little something to look at. otherwise, he likes it mostly bare.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

- he likes to be roughed up during sex, so intimacy isn’t the first thing on his mind during the actual deed. some days he likes to be wined and dined before sex, other days he wants to be choked against the wall. romantic aftercare is preferred, though :)))

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

- he doesn’t jerk off often. he saves himself for the actual deed. he cums buckets and it makes him sooo much more sensitive.

- if u bought him toys or told him to play with himself, he would. but on his own accord, probably not.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

- choking. he likes the pressure mixed with the mindless feeling he gets. brain tingle. feel good. he’ll scratch your arm and shove you away, then ask for more.

- power play. playing hard to get is his specialty. he can be so, so easy sometimes. it’s cute. other times, he is such a pain in the ass. overstimulating him until he cries usually does the trick. then he’s putty in your hands once more.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

- the couch is a favorite for him. it’s risky and gets his little heart pumping. he loves to act like he doesn’t want your hand down his pants.

- the bedroom is another fav. when he wants to put more effort in. especially if ur gonna overstimulate him. get some privacy, he’s so loud.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

- the word “no”

- threats and talk of punishment. dont tempt him with a good time.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

- absolutely no armpits. he’s so ticklish. please don’t tickle him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

- he’s not very experienced with oral, so it’s hard to judge his skills. he does a nice job for a beginner. he would 10/10 suck the strap.

- receiving head is one of his favorite things ever. anywhere and anytime. he would give up a lot for a single blowjob.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

- he likes things slow. the build up really gets him going. sex with him consists of a lot of sloppy groping and messy kissing.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

- he’s so down. he’d be fine having quickies often. after a few too many, he’d be pretty desperate for the real deal.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

- he would be okay experimenting. he wants to learn from his partners and try new things. there’s a lot to be said about his interest in the human body.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

- he can go two rounds typically. he’s wiped after one, so he needs recovery time. after morning sex, he’s ready by mid-afternoon for round two.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

- he’d be open to using toys. but he’s not the type to buy them for himself. he is very interested in different types of toys, he might ask for a certain one to try out.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

- rua only strikes when provoked. he’s very gentle and receptive to feedback. after being teased a bit by his partner, you won’t be surprised to see him acting like he’s clueless. suddenly he’s too tired to be on top and he doesn’t know where the clit is. top-tier actor.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

- he’s soooo whiny. if one hand is on his cock, the other better be over his mouth. he can’t help but be loud when he feels good.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

- rua is so inquisitive. he’s constantly asking questions.

- “did i do a good job?”

- “i need more. can i have more?”

- “can i taste you, please?”

- “i was so close. why did you stop?”

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

- average or slightly below. maybe 5 inches? he’s a small guy in general.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

- his sex drive is a bit higher than you’d expect. he’s often finding ways to get home faster so he can indulge himself in his partner. he feels guilty for all of two minutes before he remembers why he craved this so bad.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

- out like a light. if he’s worn out, he’s going right to sleep. if he’s hugged tight enough, he could sleep anywhere.

- but before he falls asleep, he likes to talk about little things. “i saw a cloud that looked like an elephant today.” “would you still love me if i was a worm?” “why do our feet smell and our noses run?”

[wolfisland]

ill admit i do at times almost miss being one of the most insufferable bisexuals on this site. like its terrible for your mental health arguing for sport and having people treat you like a legitimate public figure when youre just a dog with a blog, but im a deeply egotistical creature and all press is good press and such and such. i think i wouldve been an incredible troll if i were a worse person with a weaker moral compass.

like who needs fame when you have thousands of tumblrinas following you completely ready to skewer you at any given moment or treat you like a prophet for having common sense.

but then you also have people blatantly lying about you and taking you in such bad faith itd be almost comical if i werent so prone to cracking under pressure. like i backed up all of my old blogs so im sure i could dig around somewhere for the asks id get regularly.

i wouldnt say i regretted my old blogs either though. i regretted some things i said and did, as i do with every blog i make and every day of my life. obviously. but i do still think a lot about how special it was to get asks from people about how they learned to be more comfortable and confident in their bisexuality, or that they realised they were bisexual (or bigender) through me posting about it.

its less the sense of "haha wow im so influential" and more "im genuinely touched that i got to be part of someones journey like that when i consider my presence largely inconsequential outside of me being kind of a menace" like thats very dear to me. it makes me happy to this very day that people resonated so strongly with my disorganized ramblings.

i think its very easy to dismiss the things you say or do as having no real impact (or, if youre me, assuming all youre capable of in the long run is causing harm) but its a little more real to hear it directly from someone that something you said meant something to them in a positive way. i miss that part. i do miss hearing peoples experiences and journeys with their sexuality and gender. in the scheme of it we're lucky we even have internet access to share these things with each other. its nice to be part of something positive for once.

[meatsex]

hi im sorry if this is weird to ask and you definately dont have to answer, but how did you start transitioning? im sure its different outside the us, but i guess i mean like more how did you get the "courage" to ig? im just now in my early 20s and i want to start before its "too late", but im just worried abt so much shit surrouding it (family, my job, school, etc) and it stops me everytime i get close to trying to

im sorry, idk i just remeber seein your top surgery pics a while back and thought abt asking for a bit cause im kinda alone in this. its okay if you dont respond, ik this might be like a hard subject

hello, this isnt a weird question at all, especially if you find yourself in a situation where you feel alone about this matter.

before i begin, obviously none of the things i say are a guide or should be taken as exact reference, they are just my experience, precautions i took and things i realized/explored; this will also be LONG

i began transitioning around 2016 (i was 19-20 iirc), this is when i began to reconsider my gender and how i saw myself, i wasnt sure about my stance on myself so i used the label genderfluid as that was what felt right atm, i wasnt sure if i really wanted to be a guy or just felt like it every so often; back then i only confided this information to my then boyfriend

i began using a different name online, tried different clothing and also got my hair cut way short for the first time, basically tried and experienced, i was also used to crossplaying often (cosplaying male characters)

in 2018 i was fully set with the idea i wanted to be a man, id fully take on the role of one online and i had already told other friends i trusted about this

i stopped using the label of genderfluid by this time as well, i also tried binding a bit but it was complicated for me so it wasnt long lived but definitely helped in settling the idea of what i wanted

in 2020-2021 i came out to my parents, i tested the waters *a lot* first, i brought up topics like having transgender friends or similar too see how they would react, luckily they both did positively. after this i felt confident in telling everyone else irl

in 2022 i got my legal name change (the process in Argentina is basically a re-enacment of your birth certification with your preferred name and gender, i dont know if this is different or the same elsewhere), and in 2023 i got top surgery, the overall healing process was around 6 months, i did require aid for things like getting up from bed and eating

i was freshly 26 for my surgery by 2023, what im trying to say is for some people its something that could take a lot of time while others might find instantly this is their correct way to feel and be, but its also never too late or never too early and its also okay to change your mind and go back on how you felt, utimately its your decision to take

truthfully you will have to think and consider hard in which areas and with which people you feel safe sharing your gender, some people might not be open to the idea and depending on the circumstances it might not be worth the risk (like at a job or school) unless you have a backup plan to fall onto if it comes to a worst case scenario; i hid these things from my family for a lot of time (especially my internet-disconnected, right-leaning dad)

i think "closet" transitioning or just taking small steps that can be subtle to others is a good idea if you are still unsure about your situation and/or environment, in the sense of exploring ideas, terms, feelings, and with things like trying on different clothes or changing the way you present yourself in a smaller scale (like friends you trust or online presence)

i think its also important i was an adult by this time, therefore (as stupid as this sounds because it is) i had more credibility in the eyes of others to my emotions and how i felt, but this is something that depends and varies with the environment you are in and the people that surround you

ultimately it truly never is late or early, its okay if you try it and change your mind, no one is going to punish you for it and no one is entitled to how you feel about yourself other than you; i hope this helped in any way and if not feel free to ask again about more specific ideas or topics regarding this

[changbinsboobs]

id also like to know changbins opinions or thoughts on idols who have lazy scandals ie: they might be more hard working for their own solo projects but in their group they look like they dont even want to be there or arent always putting in enough efforts cause these days they can kinda half ass it if they want too with the whole lipsynching debacles that occur so yh id love to know his thoughts on these sorts of topics cause hes been an idol for so long he must have many feelings bottled up

cause i think hes one of the hard working ones who always want to improve or maybe do something entirely different with the groups direction cause i think skz have a habit of always playing safe and going with whats familiar to them and their fans how does he feel about skz direction and what more does he want to add or do in the near future or does he see himself going into acting and venturing out of the idol image or away from the group?

oh and how does he feel about the complexity of idol performances does he want it to slow down or remain the same? does he feel he gets enough freedom or not enough? what else do i want to know from changbin?

U don't know how happy i am to finally see a Changbin request😍😮‍💨 THANK YOU!!!

Changbins thoughts about idols with lazy scandals?

He's thought about that and thinks thats an issue that should be observed from multiple perspectives before making a judgement and he thinks a "scandal"/ situation like that has multiple sides to the story and he refrains from making any judgements if he doesn't know the situation himself. Also he thinks thats hardly a scandal and people should revise their (omg his articulation is so specific im cant even keep up, he wants to use words i don't even know, help😭) view of what components make up a scandal (i literary had to go to chatgpt to help me find the right words/expression. Still not satisfied tho, but its better than nothing). If tho it is proven that the idol is lazy performing for solely unprofessional reasons he's not really bothered by it as it doesn't affect him in any way. And if then it has a positive effect on him cuz people who appreciate effort can clearly see the comparison and appreciate his effort even more. He knows he's kept his dignity and pride towards himself and doesn't really care what other people do with themselves.

4oC, The Hermit

How does he feel about skz direction?

He does agree that they stick to whats familiar but he doesn't think thats necessarily a bad thing because that has brought them the success and bag they have today. Which is wonderful! He does wish though, to mix things up every once in a while but i think he wants to talk more about that later on in the reading. He wants to have a bit of darkness and a shocking element to his/their performances and songs, like the sound of the beat, the arrangement and melody, he wants the lyrics to shock and get gasps out of peoples moths. He wants a big reaction out of people that don't even know how to react to what they just heard/saw because its THAT good and THAT different and THAT weird! But more on that later (he keeps saying that and then he keeps on talking😂, i think he's excited)

(Also while he was talking i caught glimpses of his ideas/what he means and i really do hope he gets the opportunity to do something like that either solo or with the group or with other artists but i think we all will need that to come out and will EAT IT UP!!!)

(There's much more hiding in the Card but i feel like if i listen to it all, i'll write this post until tomorrow and won't even come to the rest so for now I'll leave it at that and see what more he has to add in the next questions.)

4oP, WOF, AoS

What does he want to do in the future?

He is actually thinking about it even now in the presence. He's evaluating multiple options and thinking about which one suits him best and will bring him most fulfillment. His focus is for it to bring him inspiration. Meaning he wants to be passionate and burn for his craft, he wants to go inspired to work every day and do something useful and meaningful. He also wants to be authentic, to be himself, to be free and have power in himself. Like have authority over himself? He can choose what he does, how he does it, etc.

2oW, 7oC, THP, PoS

His feelings on the complexity of idol performances

That they take lots of effort and skill. This also means u have to have discipline, u have to invest time, blood, sweat, tears even more, into it. You have to burn for the stage, and when you do you get rewarded. The stage rewards you. The screams rewards you. The praise rewards you. You feel loved and you feel like you did well. You grow and your confidence grows. I don't think he wants performances to get easier, he likes a got challenge and he like a good opportunity to prove himself and his abundant abilities.

The Chariot

Is he satisfied with the amount of freedom he has?

"What freedom?" Ugh😅 i was hoping for something more positive. But to be fair, he explains that even tho he doesn't have freedom he'd like to have thats what "pays the bills" for now - and i actually feel like a more accurate expression would be - serves the wine - cuz the money they get ain't just for bills its for buying cars and purchasing mansions. (I think he's someone that really appreciates money, idk how to explain it but i don't see a shame or something in him abut money like there is with lots of people, for example he has mentioned money several times in the entire reading, he's not focused on it tho, like its not all there is in his mind, but he also doesn't completely shut its existence or importance in certain matters and just makes sure to involve it as it is - a main piece of the picture). Back to the reading - he has much more to show, to offer, to create but the boundaries he finds himself within don't allow him to. I feel like mostly the beautiful and the light and the vanilla is allowed. Only thats approved. And i think he has tried to push (expand is a word he likes the sound more of🌝) the boundaries a bit but he was almost always met with a decline and until now things have been always kept in a pretty aesthetic package. So i wouldn't say he lacks complete freedom like he said in the beginning, he does have certain boundaries within he has freedom of creation but those boundaries have become way too small a long time ago and have begun to even feel suffocating, to the point he often loses his inspiration or desire to work on pieces or projects - as I've read in previous readings. But nonetheless - it pays WELL🌝

Death, 9oP, The World

Anything else he wants to add?

Yes!!! Stay tuned for my boys upcoming projects and look forward to him in the future he's gonna bring something new and fresh to the table and feed the innovation & diversity-starved!!! Basically - i believe he's already making place for something in the future, probably a solo or mixtape or something where he'll blow out mind. I suppose with their new contracts maybe he has negotiated more freedom to himself and his creative endeavors and is excited about the new creational power he now has/will soon have and what he'll do with it.

8oW, The Magician, 5oP, The Emperor

Also a quick disclaimer - the reading became more a channeled reading than a tarot reading so i hope it was still understandable and coherent.

[olderthannetfic]

Re: Hypertagging characters/ships for triggers, yeah as someone whos insane ass has a very serious trigger for a specific fictional character -particularly if they are portrayed in a positive light- I just Do Not Read Fic in that fandom by and large and blacklist it pretty hard.

It sucks I had to divorce myself from the fandom because I LIKED the earlier seasons and sometimes the fic was cute and good, but I simply cannot reasonably ask anyone to tag every mention of that character so I blacklist it all.

Its a me issue, NOT a them issue, so its my job to manage it and actually put effort into that.

That means blacklisting the show on every platform that is possible that I use, not following people who are likely to post that character, not consuming the new canon content of the show in case I get jumpscared with the character, and only ever intentionally looking for content if im in the right frame of mind to be able to stand simply seeing the name somewhere while I control+f a fic to see if they show up. I even sometimes ask friends to prescreen fics sometimes if I REALLY want to read something.

I make my own content if I want to engage with that media and I avoid the fandom. Its... I wont say its easy because it really sucks actually, but the world cannot and should not cater to me in that way. Its a competing access need and unreasonable to ask.

Its reasonable to ask a friend to warn/not deliberately show me that character- not NOT reasonable to ask a rando to do that.

Id even try to desensitize the trigger if I was in a good place for doing it but I am the wrong kind of insane to be doing that any time soon lol. Trauma work lays you right out.

To people wondering how anyone could be so fragile as to need something like that tagged; PTSD and other mental illnesses that cause serious triggers often latch onto innocuous things. Do you think I want to have such a 'cringe' trigger that causes me to [redacted] at best and have a dissociative panic attack-flashback combo AND [redacted] at worse? No its dumb as hell and I hate that there is very little to do to suppress it. Does that make the trigger go away? Also no. Its not like this is just me not liking or being uncomfortable with the character, this is an involuntary serious-hazard-to-health negative reaction I shant detail that sucks ass.

Yes us crazies do deserve to participate in fandom spaces too, we arent too broken to be barred from playing with everyone else- we just have to understand where the reasonable line is on accommodations for tagging, understand that competing access needs are a thing, and do the rest of the work ourselves.

Its not perfect but its the most good for the most people.

Id invite anyone who has a character/ship/etc trigger to seriously just blacklist the media and do what I do or even be more strict about it. You will feel so much better and more stable im not kidding. It sucks to lose a beloved fandom but you will feel so much better.

For everyone else- dont feel you need to tag every last mention on something. If you really want to be trigger friendly for some reason, you can put in the chapter notes all the minor mentions of stuff or w/e. Please Do Not put it in the proper tags.

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Sadly, "dumb as hell" is a pretty default setting for triggers. If only brains were logical and behaved themselves! But one has to work with what one's got.