#i like tall freak duke

[iwantofall]

bros 6'0 what are you doing in the spartan order duke the lakers need you

[coconut530]

SISSY FIGHT

[motherraid]

I can’t find any rules so if your uncomfortable plz feel free to ignore this but I recently found out that when a afab person sits on someone else lap, they can feel the *throb™*

So I’m currently thinking what would Sebek do if during the Masquerade s/o fem!reader ended up sitting on his lap and he felt the throb. What would he do? Would he get hard or would he wonder what it is?

Can I be ✨🎀 anon plz? If you do those kinds of anon thingies lol

Omg of course???!?!?! It's been so long since I've taken an ask from a named anon what you're so nice 😭😭😭

AND YOU HAD TO PULL A SCENARIO FROM MY FAVORITE EVENT TOO ILY

((Grinding, manipulation/gaslighting(??), boners (lol), slight exhibitionism(?? If you squint i think) more big boy words and can't really think or anything else as a description, IM SORRYYY I NEED CHARACTER EXAGGERATION IT'S AN ADDICTION))

Well, well. Back to lap sitting. It seems you all have a certain taste.

Boring answer is he feels it, gets embarrassed, and asks you to get up before he even begins to feel anything. He'd probably offer you his seat and walk off to find another seat he can sit down in. He's red faced, but that's it.

Fun answer?

I believe that Sebek WILL know where it's coming from. I'm sure he has some knowledge in sex ed or smth and if he doesn't, he's still very smart. He can make the connection and what was causing it easily. And when he looks up at you in concealed confusion, he can tell by your nonchalant expression that you aren't doing it on purpose. He assumes it's a natural thing that you shouldn't be ashamed of. So, by that logic, if you feel something hardening under your ass, surely you can understand that it's just natural, right? It's nothing to freak out over, I mean, who wouldn't get hard when there's such a darling sitting in his lap?

And who could possibly have known that something as simple as a pulse could be so alluring?

I mean, if we're talking sweet ol classic Sebek, he'd probably be aaaaabsolutely mortified. His immediate reaction would be to politely tap you on the shoulder and ask you (in the quietest voice he's ever had in his life) to stand so he can use the restroom. He won't even make it to full erection by the time he's flown from the room lol. And as soon as he makes it into semi-privacy, you won't see him for a good while. Well, at least until he can either will his erection to die or pathetically rub one out in a restroom stall like a loser (lmao). Most likely the former. His pride wouldn't allow him to do something so humiliating. If someone heard or caught him whimpering while he spazzes with his dick in his hand mid orgasm he'd truly never show his face in public again.

If you two are in a relationship then maybe he won't be so quick to run away and pitifully consider jacking off to the feeling of you throbbing in his lap- wishing he could feel your throbbing while deliciously stretched around his dick and welcoming every inch deeper into your warm cunt until either he runs out of inches or you run out of space.

No, no. He may just steadily place both hands on each of your thighs and bury his face into the back of your shoulder. Or the crook of your neck depending on how tall you are.

("Please... Just stay here for a moment. I swear that I'll let you up soon.. But for now I need you to stay put... and try not to move too much." )

And uhm.. Mk so you know it's not a Duke post without some sort or freak in there, and I just can not write something without going feral about it and the only way I can go feral about it is if I exaggerate his character so PERVY SEBEK

So if you somehow had managed to sit down in his lap and he feels his zipper area becoming a bit uncomfortable, you'd better have a strong will. The absolute degrading filth this boy will spew into your ears will either have you grinding into his crotch and begging him for more or trying to muffle your hurt/confused sobs. Best believe he ain't going nowhere, and neither are you for your little stunt. Sure, you may not have been intentionally trying to arouse him, but you are the one who insisted on using him as a seat when there are plenty of places to rest. That must have been what you wanted, huh? To see him all red faced and bothered? You probably like seeing him breaking a sweat, lip between his teeth and digging his digits into the underside of the seat. You must loove making him horny. It's like you get a kick out of it. Is it funny for you? To see him in agony?

Well, two can play at that game. Don't even bother acting surprised when he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you tight to his chest. He might wait for a person or two to pass out of view before his tongue sneaks a quick swipe against your earlobe. His breath is heavy on your neck while he nuzzles his face into your hair. Thank the Seven for the loud(ish) music echoing off the walls, or else anyone a good few feet from you would be able to hear him groaning in your ear. All while one of his hands slowly slides towards the inside of your thigh and gives it a good squeeze.

And don't even think about saying anything. It's all your fault, you know. You just casually decide to sit in a guys lap and act surprised when he gets hard? Just like your enticing second heartbeat, an erection is something that can not be helped sometimes. They can happen anywhere, and every guy can agree to that. So what will it look like when you purposefully sit in his lap, throbbing against his thigh with your ass sat firmly against his crotch? Did you forget you're in a school of boys? They'd understand him in a heartbeat. Some may even say you did it on purpose. You'll only embarrass yourself. So stay still, stay inconspicuous, and stay silent.

Let's be honest, though. He's hanging on by a thread. He's just so embarrassed that you've managed to get him this vulnerable and he's taking that out on you. You feel so warm and smell soo good. It's taking every ounce of restraint to hide his gasps and grunts from the spread crowd around you both. Trust they can't be concealed from you, though. You can hear everything. Not to mention feel everything. It's impossible to ignore him spreading his legs a bit and slowly rolling his hips into you.

If he's miserable and desperate, he'll make you feel even worse. Unless you'd rather sneak away and give him the blow job he deserves for putting up with you. Lend him you pussy for a while and he might even spare you a lecture about public decency once this trip is over. (How hypocritical.)

And he's lying. Of course you'll be getting properly disciplined when this is all over. A hands-on lecture is a must. Best not to worry about that now, though. Just enjoy the moment. He sure is.

("I should have known better than to humor you. To think I actually believed you might have been behaving decently for once.")

[fryingpan1234567]

canonically Jason and Tim have motorcycles, right? and B and Duke too but the other two are more well known I think

ANYWAYS what if everyone in the batfam had one tho? because. the potential.

Dick takes his off of roofs sometimes, but it’s built for it. before all his modifications, it was just a blue and black chrome Yamaha sports bike, nothing special. he added a Nightwing sticker on each side, a bunch of weapons (mostly electricity based), grappling hooks, Nightwing things. there’s even a sidecar for Haley.

Babs (before the wheelchair days) had a purple and yellow one that matched her suit perfectly. it sort of meant she couldn’t use it during the day, but occasionally she rode it to work with extensive concealing of the random dangerous gadgets. hers was also a Yamaha (same model ^^)

Jason canonically has a black shapeshifting one like some maccadams shit but it’s fine— it’s loud as shit, so he doesn’t really use it for patrol, but he loves it during the day. because it’s just black, it’s pretty easy to take it out for completely non-suspicious speeding law breaking joyrides. no harm done!

Cass has a jet black Ninja, and her reputation on the streets is about the same as the nightfury’s at the beginning of the first httyd. dark, deadly, and it’s even quiet in Gotham’s busy streets. watch your back for her.

Tim’s got the BATCYCLE it’s CANON. it’s also canon that it’s got a liquid-cooling engine and a Robin-themed paint job, but fuck that, I say it’s dark red and electric and he rides it to work. so sometimes (most of the time) he pulls up with ruffled clothes and helmet hair, which Conner nearly fainted at the first time he saw it, but we don’t talk about that. he doesn’t use it for patrol because Kon said he’d carry him everywhere if Tim gave him rides in exchange. on the bike. he has said on more than one occasion “wear the helmet, ride a biker” and Tim punches him really hard

Steph’s bike is purple, and the wheels do the hover-shift-glowy thing like in Mario Kart (also purple). she’s not scared of you or anyone; she will ride that shit to school and use it on patrol with the hovering and distracting color and everything. fight me.

in canon, Duke’s bike is electric with a bunch of lights and black and yellow and lowkey built like a tank. I kinda like it! I think it’s a fabulous bike for a fabulous man so therefore he gets to keep it I won’t be taking criticism

Damian gets a green and red and black electric Ninja, plus a helmet that he painted with feathers and paw prints n shit. Jon likes the spare, which is just black but has a red mohawk. what more could you want? he could fly everywhere, but he also could just have his badass motorcycle bf drive him everywhere while he wears his dope ass helmet and vibes to whatever 2000s pop shit Damian lets him play. he’s a professional backpack.

did you think I’d stop at the Batkids? sorry imma keep going

I like the idea of Brucie having a black sports bike that’s 90% modifications like in the movie. no one remembers what it was before he took it all apart and added Bat-stuff, but it looks great now! it’s blown up more times than you can count, just because it’s a really good target for rogues.

Kate has one that’s almost exactly the same, except hers is maybe a little closer to what it was originally. she doesn’t quite have all the same stuff Bruce does, but they’re the same vibe!

anyways that’s the vigilante weirdos club, so like it’s expected that they’d all have a dangerous vehicle. slightly less expected— Alfred freaking Pennyworth has a Harley with tall handles and sparkly black paint, but nobody knew that for such a long time because he barely leaves the manor. all the kids lost their minds when they found out. what can I say

anyways some Bat-bike shenanigans that have ensued:

street races between all the Batkids at least once a week, whether that be on patrol or in civvy clothes

Jason obnoxiously revving really loud whenever he sees one of them in the street, on a date, when he’s picking them up from something, just as often as possible. obnoxious revving. old people hate him

cool lesbian aunt Kate picking up kids from school with her badass bike and epic helmet

sometimes Dick will be talking about “his child” or “his baby” and no one’s sure if he’s talking about his dog or his bike

bike-related thirst traps on social media

“race you to the next light”

not a single one of them has left a Gotham speeding law intact even once (not even Alfred, although he won’t admit it)

Wally likes to get Dick to race him on his bike even though he knows he’s going to win

both Jon and Conner have said something along the lines of “I bet I could pick up the bike with you on it” as a show-off attempt, but Damian and Tim love their paint jobs too much to permit them to try

Batfam on bikes❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[brokenstar28]

Incorrect Bat-Family Quotes 2

Damian: I don’t hate you. I hate everyone.

Jason: The feeling is mutual.

~~~

Jason: Would you rather kill Tim, or—

Damian: Yes, kill him.

Jason: I didn’t say the other—

Damian: I don’t need to hear it.

Tim: …I’m feeling a little unsafe.

~~~

Dick: I've never encountered a problem that can't be solved by a spontaneous musical number.

~~~

Damian: Would you take a bullet for me?

Dick: ...yes?

*Tim angrily burst into the room*

Damian: *running away* Great, thanks!

~~~

*the TV is freaking out*

Jason: Don’t worry, you have to treat an electronic like you treat a patient on life support.

*unplugs the TV, then plugs it back in again. nothing changes*

Jason: Yeah, that didn’t work with my grandma either.

~~~

Tim: Do you ever feel like exploding? Have you experienced the urge to enter the process of combustion? Has your mind created a logical idea, known as thought, to suddenly disperse your body into thousands of particles?

Jason: It’s 3 am, please go back to sleep.

~~~

Damian: I swear to god I'm the only one here with a braincell.

Dick, Jason, Steph, and Tim: ALL HAIL the keeper of the sacred braincell! Hail! Hail

~~~

Tim: I’m totally useless.

Damian: You’re not totally useless.

Damian: You can be used as a bad example.

~~~

Bruce: I’m telling you, my team is competent.

Dick, rushing in: Bruce! Tim tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!

~~~

Bruce: In your opinion, what is the height of stupidity?

Damian, turning to Tim: How tall are you?

~~~

Tim: All I did was kill Damian, is that really such a crime?

Dick: ...

Dick: Yes?!

~~~

Jason: I just wanted to say that over the years, I have come to regard you as… people I met.

~~~

Dick: Get in the Halloween spirit and make a ghost!

Tim: That’s called murder and I heard somewhere that it was illegal.

~~~

Jason: Hey, Dick. These candies you gave me? They sucked.

Dick: But you ate them all.

Jason: I had to make sure they all sucked.

~~~

Tim: I have a problem.

Dick: If it's harder than 2+2, I can't help.

~~~

Damian: Could you guys at least try to see this from my perspective?

Tim: *crouches down*

Cass: *kneels down*

Dick: *sits on the floor*

Damian: ...

Damian: I hate all of you.

~~~

Dick: Is it still visible? Where Bruce slapped me?

Jason: Your face looks like a don't walk signal.

Duke: Your face looks like a photo negative for the hamburger helper box.

Damian: A palm reader could tell Bruce's future by looking at your face.

Tim: The phrase 'talk to the hand cause the face ain't listening' doesn't work for you, because the hand is your face.

Dick: ...A simple 'yes' would've sufficed.

~~~

Damian: I never understood why people cared so much about their dumb friends until I got a dumb friend myself.

Damian: *Picks up Jon*

Damian: I’ve only befriended Jon for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then my self.

Damian: And then burn the world.

~~~

Dick: Good morning!

Damian: Is it? Is it really?

[thiccpersonality]

B My Valentine: (aka) A brief love holiday interlude to Damian (Gremlin) Wayne and his even more gremlin-esque family

It was Valentine's Day at Wayne Manor. A usually peaceful and non destructive holiday. Usually you'd expect for a love filled holiday event to be filled with...well, love and affection for each other and remembering what makes you love each other.

But in Wayne Manor, Valentine's Day means more competition, for what you ask? Well, for more of Bruce's approval of course! Every night (actually weeks) before the big day Bruce's family spends the night(s) toiling away at handmade cards and ideas, each trying to outdo the other on their gifts and carefully crafted surprises for their dear dad.

But...they (Richard, Jason and Tim) have an issue. There's extra competition today, not only is that brat Damian (reluctantly admitted by the older boys to be) super talented, but those wenches Bruce (for some reason) adopted into the family suddenly flocked towards Wayne Manor with a competitive gleam in their eyes. The three eldest could practically smell the determination from Barbara, Stephanie and Cassandra.

Bruce's cousin Kate even came, but she said it was for the seasonal goodies and to watch the chaos unfold. Although, the boys and girls are weary about her...the woman can be surprisingly great at hiding her emotions, even to the point of confusing Cass sometimes.

Of course no one lets Bruce in on the fact his family are being competitive on such a loving day, they just are content on letting the man bask in the loudness of his large home. The man always brightens up in his own way when everyone (or almost everyone. Duke couldn't make it) manages to visit, the corners of his lips turn up slightly and everyone has come to notice a happy blush overtakes his usually pale cheeks.

Which brings everyone to now. January 14th: Valentine's Day on a Wednesday at 7am. Richard waking up at a horrid smell coming from what he assumes to be the kitchen, his jaw clenching when he goes to check his hidden camera in the kitchen only to find the device not working and showing a glitchy and static screen.

The acrobat creeps out of his bed and down the hallway and stairs towards his target, his ears honing in on the quiet curses from a woman. Richard slips into the kitchen to watch Stephanie freaking Brown trying to cook...whatever it is? The older can't actually tell with how charred the...pancake? Or some batter like texture is burned and others a mixture of charred and undercooked.

Stephanie gasps at a tall shadow being cast behind her the girl preparing to turn around only to be pressed into the counter as an all too familiar voice whispers softly and all too sweetly in her ear, "Do you need my help, traitor?"

Richard allows the blonde to turn around and smiles down at the flustered girl, "Traitor!? How am I a traitor? We never agreed to work together." Stephanie sputters and blows a strand of hair out of her face.

Richard narrows his eyes at the younger girl and pulls away, "I suppose so. But your actions these past few days were letting me know we had some sort of pact. How could you shut off my cameras like that?" Stephanie look at the taller confused, "You...put cameras up to watch us? What is wrong with this family!?"

From the doorway comes a deeper voice, Jason holding out his hands to show the covert listening devices-aka: bugs/wires that were put in his and everyone else's rooms-when the two turn to look at him.

"Then how do you explain THESE, Stephanie? I know you and Timbo were helping each other bug everyone's rooms. You two thought you could be sooo sneaky."

Stephanie opens her mouth to defend herself, but Tim suddenly appears from a cabinet, stepping in front of the now baffled girl. "Not another word Stephanie, he has no proof. As far as we know he could be accusing us of his own crimes."

A burst of laughter escapes Jason and he pulls out his phone to wave it around, "Are you sure about that? I wouldn't sound so confident talking like that to the person who has video evidence from A CERTAIN SOMEONE'S hidden cameras." Tim gasps and Stephanie curses, the two looking to a betrayed looking Richard who points at the skunk haired teen.

"I-It was you who shut off my cameras! You knew about them and were using them to get blackmail material!"

Tim crosses his arms and huffs, "Kind of sus that he knew about my bugs as well! Almost like he was spying on us the whole time!"

Richard gasps again and turns to Stephanie, "Or almost like he had help shutting things down and figuring things out so a CERTAIN GIRL could sneak her ass downstairs to make Bruce handmade food." Stephanie's eyes widen and she shakes her head, "I demand a lawyer. You can't pin all of this on me! We were helped by Barbara!"

At the confession a curse is heard from what sounds like a speaker, when Jason gets to searching he finds one behind the fridge, Barbara's voice bitter as it speaks. "I'll get you for this, Steph. So what if I helped them both? You both asked help from Cass to take those cameras down as well."

Jason and Steph curse while Tim sips at his suddenly materialized coffee, shaking his head disappointedly. "There's no loyalty in family anymore. Where did the trust go?"

Cassandra jump scares everyone by suddenly appearing on top of the fridge, her brown eyes staring down on them like a judgmental god, "No trust. Only war. You three let downs. Quiet agreement. You break truce-" brown eyes narrow accusingly at Jason and Stephanie-"Now my enemies. Free game."

Barbara suddenly appears from the doorway and immediately starts to pin blame on the two teens.

Chaos soon erupts and everyone is pinning blame on one another. The arguing group not noticing Damian listening from above the steps and smiling to himself at how everything worked out beautifully. He still finds it odd how a mysterious source left a note in his room about all the going ons of his enemies siblings...but he'll count his blessings one by one he supposes.

Damian excitedly rushes to Bruce's room and opens the door quietly, stilling at seeing his father up in bed with Alfred by his side. The two men holding bugging devices and watching videos of everything that happened the past few weeks, Bruce looks up in surprise at Damian before his brows furrow.

"What is all this?"

Damian opens and closes his mouth, too flustered at being caught to respond. At the silence Bruce just sighs and stands up, grabbing Damian's small hand in his and leading him back out of the room. "I assume your siblings are up as well? We need to have a talk about this right now."

Damian bows his head as he's led into the kitchen by Bruce, everyone quieting down at realizing they've been caught red-handed.

--A few minutes later--

"It's touching that you all want my affection...but if this is the only reason you celebrate Valentine's Day is to squabble and one up each other...then maybe don't. A-Am I really that bad at letting you guys know I love and appreciate you that you have to fight for me to notice you?"

Jason frowns at that and shakes his head, "You can be a bit emotionally constipated-" he grunts at the elbow in his side-"But we know you love us! It's more of like...your love is such a treasure we get greedy and want to eliminate any and all competition!"

Bruce looks up at the genuine smiles and nods of agreement from his children, the man sighing and shoulders slumping more. "But I want to love all of you-" Ice blue eyes turn to look at the mess in the kitchen curiously and hopefully-"Oh? W-Were you all trying to make me breakfast? Did you all come together to try and make me food?"

Everyone freezes and looks at each other before coming to a silent agreement, all the Wayne children smiling and nodding quickly, their voices meshing together to sound like a happy symphony.

"Of course! We only wanted you to be happy!"

Bruce's eyes widen in shock and awe, his cheeks flushing happily as he stands and starts directing his kids to do different tasks. "I used to cook with Alfred a lot as a kid! We can cook breakfast together!"

The family get so distracted cleaning up Stephanie's mess that they don't notice Kate and Alfred at the kitchen entrance. The former huffing a laugh and looking at the butler suspiciously, "So how did you do this?"

Alfred keeps his gaze forward and smirks the tiniest bit before patting the red head's arm and turning away. "I had no involvement my dear child, it must be cupid working their magic. You go join them and I'll be right back."

Kate tilts her head but quickly rushes into the chaos to join her cousin and his crazy kids.

Alfred smiles at hearing the laughter and noise coming from the kitchen as he heads up the stairs again. Damian's complaints being heard on Stephanie and Tim's mixing patterns, Richard fighting with Jason on who's going to lick the spoon and Cass and Barbara murmuring quietly on how they'll decorate Bruce's plate to look pretty.

After arriving to Bruce's bedroom again Alfred steps onto the balcony, clears his throat and looks towards the sky, "Master Kent." Only a millisecond passes before Clark-or he should say Superman-is hovering in front of him, deep blue eyes curious on the outcome of his mission.

"So how did everything go? Did you really need to do all this just for them to calm down enough to act...civilized?"

Alfred smiles and nods, "Of course! The one thing we all can agree on is Bruce's happiness, as soon as master Bruce was disheartened by their behaviors they immediately pulled their acts together and are now making breakfast with hi-"

"Alfred? Is everything alright up here? I just thought you'd be quick to come take pi-" Bruce pauses at seeing Clark hovering outside and makes his way over to the two men-"Clark? Is everything okay? You didn't get hit with Kryptonite did you!?" Alfred smirks softly as the final part of his plan is in motion, the older gentleman eyeing the Valentine's card poking out from Superman's red shorts, the butler whispering so only Clark can hear him as he excuses himself.

"I do believe you have something to give master Bruce?"

Clark looks down nervously as the door clicks shut and he hovers closer to the concerned man, taking a deep breath in and shoving the handmade card he crafted for Bruce into his chest. "Happy Valentine's Day!"

Bruce stumbles back just a little and looks at the card, smiling at the words 'B Mine' written on the admittedly gorgeously crafted card and blushing in a mixture of shyness and happiness. "A pun on my nickname? You even drew little bats."

Clark scratches his head and chuckles nervously, "I-I know it's cheesy bu-"

"I'll be your Valentine!"

Clark gasps softly and finally makes eye contact with Bruce, delighting in the pink blush spreading across his face and down to the elegant neck, the blush intensifying at Clark's intense stare. It's at the other man's silence that Bruce repeats himself.

"I-I said I'll be your Valentine...so come and make breakfast with us?"

Deep blue eyes adoringly stare at the endearing human being before him. Clark realizing that Alfred's right as he concedes under the hypnotizing ice blue eyes and the small tug on his cape, the man super speeding into his regular everyday clothes and coming back with a wide smile as he prepares himself for a breakfast with the Wayne's.

They all really would do anything for Bruce's happiness...even if that means sacrificing your safety for a day with your Valentine and his gremlin family.

(I don't know how or why I basically wrote a whole fanfiction for you all? It was supposed to be something shorter...but I obviously got carried away XD. Happy Valentine's Day everyone and I hope whoever reads this enjoys it and has a lovely day, week, month and year.

Please remember to stay safe, happy, healthy and of course lovely as always. 💛)

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

out of curiosity, do you have any preferred headcanons for how tall the members of the Batfam are? who's the tallest to shortest?

listen I don't have exact measurements but I do have vibes. I'm going to say right out of the gate that I simply do not hold with DC artists and their habit of Russian nesting dolling the Robins so they're each a little bit shorter with age, it's a useful visual shorthand but it's also not my truth even if I sometimes agree with portions.

for instance: I do have to concede that Bruce needs to be the tallest of the Batboys in order to enable a lot of his whole schtick, especially your modern era Batmans who are built to be tanks as opposed to the sleeker, more acrobatically-oriented Batman of earlier ages. Batfleck honestly had a great build for it, 6'4 and built to loom.

on the other hand, I Know what male gymnasts look like and Dick came from a whole family of them; he doesn't need to be SHORT short but brother he is not the tallest Robin by any stretch. he's 5'8 if he's Lucky, likely shorter. and he's fine with it! he isn't insecure about being a compact king!

I strongly dislike the recent development towards drawing adult Jason as a brute, but I have long enjoyed the headcanon that he would have had a hard growth spurt after Bruce took him in and he didn't have to worry about food insecurity. he is absolutely taller than Dick but, HOT TAKE, I don't think he's a Lot taller. as Red Hood he's definitely exaggerating the difference with chunky boots + his stupid full-face mask for extra height, + his jacket and all his gear make him look taller and broader than Nightwing in his little skintight getup. out of costume they physically look much more similar.

I also super hate when Tim is drawn as a skinny short little waif, genuinely there's no reason for that. that's a little American rich boy who grew up on milk and white bread, there's no reason for him to look like he has Victorian urchin wasting disease. fuck this, Tim is taller than both Dick and Jason. same energy as the improv kid I went to high school with who was 5'11 but cool about it.

completing the circle and fully reversing the Robins, I know that other fans have pointed out that Damian's Asian heritage conspires against him being hugelarge as an adult, but genetics are a grab bag and I think he deserves to be Bruce-sized. adult Damian can pick Dick up and put him in the fridge if he wants. at present though his growth spurt is really taking its sweet time and he's hovering around Cass-height (see below).

Duke is hovering in a zone right between Jason and Tim but everyone forgets that and imagines him being taller because the little bat ears on his helmet give him a couple extra inches.

a lot of older comics, especially the Dixon run, frequently have Selina drawn like she's tall as all hell, and I honestly love that for her. 5'11, Megan Thee Stallion kind of build for her.

Cass is frequently drawn as tiny to an extent that is, frankly, implausible and borderline upsetting (if memory serves she literally got folded up and carried in a backpack once?) but listen: she's certainly not tall. I'm willing to offer her 5'3 as an absolute maximum. also literally no one asked but Michelle Yeoh is the Lady Shiva of my heart and shes 5'4, so that's canon To Me.

however tall Dick is in your head I want you to add one (1) inch and that's Barbara. this is so crucial to me.

Steph is like a deeply average 5'4 and a half, and I realize this Does mean that I've Russian nesting dolled the Batgirls (at least in order of appearance in comics, not the actual order they Batgirls) and I am Fine with that. throw Harper Row in here too, she and Steph are just chilling being average height gal pals.

Helena is freakishly tall by Italian woman standards, by which I mean like 5'7.

this is vile and I'm sorry to the Robins but unfortunately Jean Paul is a genetically engineered freak bred to kill so he's probably taller than all of them save for an adult Damian. 6'2 to my miserable boy. beginning to think I was lying when I said I didn't have exact numbers.

so I think in descending order the lineup I've created is Bruce, JP, Selina and Tim, Duke, Jason and Babs, Dick, Helena, Steph and Harper, Damian, Cass.

did I skip anyone vital you want to know about?

[agomeangelcat]

Trigun Troupe with a Isekaid Reader who generally sings earth songs!

-GROUP BEING CHASED-

Y/N: RUN DEVIL RUN RUN DEVIL RUN RUN!!! 

Wolfwood: STOP SINGING AND RUN!!!

___

Y/N: Your are an angel with a shotgun!

Vash: ??? -eating pizza rolls-  

___

Y/N: A seven nation army couldn't hold me back!!!  -Y/N with Wolfood glasses and punisher in hand-

Wolfwood: Y/N U FREAK, I WILL KILL YOU!!!

Vash: NO!

__

Y/N: Six feet tall and super strong!  we always get along! 

- points Vash with finger guns-

Vash: -laughs putting his hands up-

_

-All sitting around a bonfire but Y/N its a little faraway looking at the night sky

Y/N: I don't know if you can hear me or if you're even thereI don't know if you would listen to a my people's prayer

Wolfwood: - thought it was a prayer instead of a song-

Y/N: Yes, I know I'm just an outcast I shouldn't speak to you Still I see your face and wonder Were you once an outcast too?

Meryl and Roberto: -were too stunned too speak-

Vash: i like that one.

__

Y/N points at Roberto.

Y/N: Your my dad bogieogie ogie!

Roberto: ...sure kid.

___

Y/N leans into Meryl's back with a distress face. 

Y/N: I kissed a girl and I liked it the taste of her cherry chapstick-

Meryl: Y/N!?

___

Vash, Wolfwood and Y/N trapped upside down after being chased and captured.

Y/N: i have a song for this!

Wolfwood: NO-

Y/n: Oh, the misery Everybody wants to be my enemy Spare the sympathy Everybody wants to be my enemy-OW WOLFWOOD!

Vash: please dont fight you two.

__

Y/N: WOLFIE I HAVE A SONG FOR YOU!!! 

Wolfwood: JESUS ​​NO-

Y/N: Mummy don't know daddy's getting hot!!!  -Y/N jump on top of the car doing the clip-dance-

Wolfwood blushes.

Y/N: At the body shop, doing something unholy -makes the sign of the cross-

Meryl was holding back her laughter at the absurd scene. 

Roberto: I need a drink. 

Wolfwood was too shocked to speak and too embarrassed to ask the rest of the lyrics, he didn't want to appear interested in Y/N's nonsense. 

Vash: ...what's the rest of the lyrics? 

Wolfwood: NO!

___

Y/N pulls Vash away from the group in the desert. 

Vash: Show me your Moves!

Y/N: ! Hohoho...California girls We're unforgettable Daisy dukes, Bikinis on top!

Vash and Y/N start doing Power and Denji's dance.

Y/N: Sun-kissed skin So hot We'll melt your popsicle!!! 

Wolfwood: -Inhales-

(Wolfwood is Aki.)

[stuffedwalrus]

Little damian and duke bonding thing

TW: Internalized transphobia

“I..” Damian hesitates, something that makes Duke's mouth snap shut with an audible click. “I am not who you believe me to be. I..have deceived you all.” 

“What?” Duke breathes out, intending to stop at that one word. He didn’t, however, instead continuing with a slight tilt of his head. “You get a new cat? A new secret identity? Wait, no, don’t tell me! You’re a clone.”

Damian, much to Duke's relief, rolls his eyes so hard it looks like it’d hurt on anyone else and scoffs at him. “Don’t be ridiculous, Thomas. This is serious.”

“Right, yeah, sorry. Keep going.”

“Tt” Damian sends another quick glance towards the exit, most likely assuring that no one was around to hear what he clearly needed to say and, frankly, it’s highly unlikely anyone would be. Damian had found him in a corner of the mansion not even Alfred frequented more than a handful of times throughout the months. A quiet, secluded, area towards the back of the manor with tall windows that overlooked the backyard and all the eerie land around the manor. The doors, made of large solid slabs of mahogany and forged years before even Bruce was a thought help in keeping the room hauntingly silent, allowing it to go relatively unnoticed. 

Duke is starting to think that finding his shoes in here was a lot more deliberate than before, as Damians eyes slowly did another sweep across the sitting room.  

“Hey, I really am sorry…about making it silly. Whatever this is seems important to you and I—”

“Shut up, Thomas. You're making me regret this.”

“Right, right. Carry on.”

Damian takes one more glance around the room before leaning his upper body closer towards Duke, a grave expression on his face. 

“I am…not a boy.”

“Oh.” Duke pauses, whole body going still while he processes the new information. “You’re…not a boy?”

“No.” Da-they mutter, looking away. Duke hums, shifting his body weight from where it had settled at the tips of his fingers. He wills a few shadows away, the one he naturally creates when he gets the urge to hide, and looks to his…younger sibling with something he hopes looks like empathy. 

“Okay, not a boy. Cool, that’s cool. I’m not, either.”

“What.” Dami(?) says flatly, looking at Duke with a mix of emotions that he cannot pinpoint. He thinks he sees contempt somewhere in there, though. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I-” Duke cuts himself off, looking back and forth between D and the door. “I mean I’m not a boy either. I haven’t really told anyone in the family, kinda wanted to feel stuff out first, y'know but. Yeah.” He finishes lamely. It’s clear D is not impressed if the look on her(?) face is anything to go by. They don't say anything immediately, which causes a swirl of emotions to fill Duke's chest but finally, after a few tense minutes, D speaks. 

“I refuse to sit here and be mocked by you, you insolent-”

“Whoa, whoa. Who’s mocking you?” Duke asks, genuine confusion flooding his brain. He thinks back on his words, wondering what it is that possibly could’ve been misconstrued. “I’m not mocking you?”

“Then what are you doing?” D hisses, shoulder tight with something a little too closed in to be anger. 

“I’m…trying to relate?” He says like a question which makes D curl up tighter. “I just- I’m not a boy. You said you weren’t and I…thought it’d make you feel better if you knew I wasn’t fully one either?”

“You were born a girl too?”

“I-what.” Duke blinks, eyes widening as he looks to D with scrunched up brows. “No? I was assigned male at birth…were you not?”

Suddenly D…Damians(?) face heats up as he(?) averts his eyes from Duke. It’s the first time he’s ever seen Damian do that and it’s kind of freaking him out. “Did I not just tell you such?”

“I..I thought…wait so are you trans or not?”

“What’s trans?”

Duke blinks at the kid. Once. Twice. Realizes they’re fully serious. He suddenly rises from his seat, feeling the need to pace around while he tries to process what it is exactly that he’s missing. 

“Okay…okay. You said you aren’t a boy-”

“Correct.” Damian murmurs, looking to Duke with open weariness and a little bit of annoyance.

“That you were assigned female at birth-”

“Yes, Thomas we’ve established.”

“But…we all know you as a boy.”

Damian physically curls up on himself now, bringing his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He rests his head on his knees but doesn’t look anywhere near Duke.

 “I…I was told to, by mother, when I first got here.” He explains but not really because that is, in no way, shape or form, an acceptable explanation. Luckily he continues. “I was told it’d be better to tell father I was a boy, in case there may be any issues with me being heir due to my gender. After I cut off all connections to mother and the league I...remained a boy. I feared revealing such information may cause my path to redemption to suffer…”

“But?” Duke prods, gently, brain making connections seconds ago but needing the words straight from Damian himself.

“But..” Damian does finally look at him now, though it's brief and filled with something so so heartbreaking before it’s immediately covered up by that classic Wayne Family Wall Building. “But…I…had grown quite comfortable portraying myself as male. It was…nice. I had never given much thought to who I was before I came here but…if I had had a choice…I believe I would have chosen to be a male from the very beginning.”

He shoots another glance at Duke, immediately averting his eyes down to the bright green fuzzy socks he adorned. “Though I am aware that is a foolish desire. I am a girl…I cannot escape that.”

Duke thinks he hears Damian mutter a small “no matter how hard I try” under his breath but doesn't think too hard about it because he's far too busy taking in a big breath. Letting it out. Doing it another time for good luck and sanity. 

“Okay…can I tell you what I thought was going on?”

Damian raises a brow but gestures at him to continue. 

“I thought…that when you told me that…I was gonna have a new sister or something.”

“I am not new. I was always your sister.”

“You’ve never been my sister, Dami. I thought you were trans but, like, the other way at first. “

“ I..still don’t know what that means.” Damian mutters, still clearly upset by his lack of knowledge about something. Anything, really. 

“It's..it's you, I guess. It's when someone is born as one gender but realizes they're actually another gender. Or no gender, that works too. Or both genders. Or, really anything. Like, all the genders but not all the time? I'm that, I think? Look-” He cuts himself off, finally sitting back down on the couch next to Damian. “If you were technically born a girl but you're a lot more comfortable and happier being a boy then…well no one's gonna tell you to go back to being a girl.”

Damian looks at him suspiciously, eyebrow raised to the high heavens. 

“You're pulling my leg.”

“I'm not. I wouldn't. Not about this.” Duke reassured, placing a hand in the space between him and Damian. It doesn't quite reach the other boy but it's there if he wants it. Needs it. 

“You are.” Damian insists, sitting up straighter and shooting a disapproving look at the hand. “Grandfather would never allow such a…a delusional existence.” 

“It's not delusional. It's real and it's completely valid and…and super cool and…shit I am not made for these speeches.” 

“I'll say,” Damian snorts, hands crossing over his chest.

“What I'm saying is you don't have to be a girl if you don't want to. If you want to keep being a boy then be a boy. We'll all accept you, dude. It's all good.”  

Damian doesn't say anything, instead sitting almost completely still and silent for a good five minutes. Duke was about to shake him before his head suddenly snapped up, looking towards Duke's direction. 

“I want to be a boy. If I am truly allowed to choose…I choose this. I choose to be Damian.”

“Cool.” Duke nods, smiling. “That's cool, dude. Glad you're learning new things about yourself.”

“Yes. It is...good. And you're sure father will not be upset?” 

“Nah. When Tim came out as bi Bruce went on a whole deep dive learning all about the community and making sure he was super inclusive. If anything he might be too supportive.” 

Damian snorts and Duke silently pats himself on the back for this big bro moment of his.

“Though, quick question.” Duke says, mind raking through every bit extra thought in his mind.  “Why...did you tell me? Before anyone else? Before Bruce or Dick?” 

“Well…” Damian hesitates. He's been doing that a lot these past few minutes. It should freak Duke out but right now his brain is fried and stuck in protective older brother mode. Every hesitance is just an added weight to his already cracking heart. “You're the most accepting of strange situations and people and I assumed you'd be the most…okay with my lies. Nor would you use it as blackmail against father or Grayson. You're good, Thomas. I….I needed good.”

“None of the others would do that to you.” Thomas says first, placing a hand on Damians shoulder. “They're jerks sometimes but they're not monsters. They're yo-our siblings. They'd let you come out on your own time.” 

Damian doesn't say anything and Duke doesn't make him. They sit in silence for a few minutes before Damian's body slowly starts to tilt to the side. He lands, gently, onto Duke's shoulders, his head resting perfectly on top. 

“I'll have to let them know eventually. They'll want to let the public know and I'll need a good cover story to hide why they were unaware of the truth.” 

“You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. For however long you don't want to do it. This is your thing, not theirs. You can tell them and we'll never tell the press or Gotham and you'll go on just like how you are. All your shit says male, anyway. Not like we'd have to change anything there.” 

“I guess.” 

“And medically everything can be covered. Bruce can make, like, a thousand NDA’s. You might get some pills or some shots or some other stuff. Nothing crazy. Nothing anyone will look down on you for.” 

Damian hums, mouth pressed shut. 

“And, hey,” he nudges Damian to look up at him, making sure their eyes meet. “I'll be right there with you if you want. No matter what anyone says or how anyone reacts, I'll always be in your corner, okay? Always.” 

“I—” he cuts himself off with a quick yank of his head and a hidden sniff. “Thank you, Th—...Duke. Thank you, Duke. I appreciate it.” 

“Anytime, Dami. Anytime.”

[victorianprincesskitkat]

A (not-so) comprehensive list of antagonists/villains who would do "The Necklace Thing." This does not count antagonists/villains we Do Not Like (Like Cal in Titanic or The Duke in Moulin Rouge) who have done The Necklace ThingTM. MCU Loki: would make a necklace out of ice probably too. Would definitely stand behind someone, rest his hands on their shoulders, and then skillfully clasp a necklace around their neck. Probably would rest his hands on their neck too. His touch is cold, but surprisingly gentle. There is no fear as he brushes his finger over the neck.

Jareth: oh, come on. The man is a fae king. He's bringing up a crystal ball, transforming it into a necklace, and clasping it on while singing. Probably fixes the hair a bit. Glitter is everywhere. It might be a magic necklace that has a Faerie Price to pay. But honestly? Worth it.

Erik, the Phantom of the Opera: Has canonically done "The Necklace ThingTM in Love Never Dies. Love Never Dies sucks though. But for anything, we count The Necklace Thing. Night time may sharpen and heighten each sensation, and the actual *shivers* from him doing The Necklace ThingTM with his organ playing fingers would be intense. That sounds like a euphemism for something else. It's not. Also, he probably learned to do this from seeing it in a scene in an opera. (I will have you know that searching for a Phantom gif brought up a lot of Hadley Fraser as Raoul and honestly. Mood.)

Norman Osborn: hot take. I've been thinking about this one a lot. (Too much.) But I fully believe that Norman Osborn, specifically from Earth 11714, would DEFINITELY do The Necklace ThingTM before some sort of work party/event to Emily Osborn. I mean, it's just in that Southern Gentleman Charm that he has. Oh! Just think about that Oscorp party where there's a baby grand piano and slinky silk dresses and he grabs her shoulder and says "Wait a minute, darling," dipping into that lower voice when he turns into Goblin, and takes a necklace from a black velvet box and just mmMMM it's so nice to think about. Is this purely self-indulgent to think of and is this list hinging on this one character? Yes, but it's a whole Necklace ThingTM post and a freak like me needs company so.... (also, I do think this works for the Raimi Osborn too, so feel free to picture Willem Dafoe. But this was mostly inspired by Turn Off the Dark.) I think I operate under the principle of "If he wears suspenders, he's probably going to do The Necklace ThingTM."

Preminger: Yeah, Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper. That guy. The man wears rings on most of his fingers. You think he *isn't?* about to do The Necklace ThingTM? He'd do it quickly and laugh while clasping it. Probably make it about himself. However, I think he does have the capability to be more romantic, than say Wenlock, who I don't actually think would do the thing. Wenlock would fall under the Cal and Duke list, honestly, if he were to clasp a necklace on someone. Preminger, however, and maybe this is my own bias talking (it is) would probably unironically do the necklace thing, and surprisingly well. It also probably makes him feel tall because whoever is obtaining the necklace would definitely be sitting in front of a vanity as opposed to say Norman Osborn who would clasp on a necklace while he and Emily are standing. (Somehow this turned back around to Norman...) anyway. Preminger for the Necklace List? I think so.

Dr. Henry Jekyll: Mmm, so I realize that adding Jekyll to this list may seem antithetical to the whole point of this post being about antagonists/villains, but ah. Jekyll actually probably should be on the list. But I'm not about to delve into the "Dr. Jekyll is actually an antagonist" though one could make a very strong case in any of the adaptations that he is some sort of antagonist for somebody. So, take your pick of the adaptation, be it "book accurate" or Wildhorn Musical. (Take a guess which adaptation for which I'm about to find a gif.) I think he makes the list. However, I think he's rather shy about it. He'd take his fiancée aside right before a party, then quietly reveal the necklace, and motion to put it on. It's clandestine, and peaceful, and very much a "Take me as I Am" sort of moment. A brief moment of curling a finger around a lock of hair. The gentle furtive glances from the repressed Late Victorian Era. Oh, it's more scandalous to think of when you realize how tantalizing the touch of his bare fingers over a collarbone is in 1885. (I had to SCROLLLLLL To find a gif I thought would work... and it was worth it. I have 0.2 regrets. It was between this gif and one of Frederick March.)

Captain Hook: No. Not from OUAT. (I'm not a fan of that show. I know sacrilegious.) I'm talking about the 2003 movie Captain Hook because oh, come on. Look at him. He's found a mermaid treasure trove, plundered it, then is clasping that necklace around a neck while reciting some shanty or poem. I fully believe there is textual evidence within the book that would back these claims. But most definitely 2003 James Hook is doing The Necklace ThingTM. He's probably more genteel than you'd give him credit for, ya know, being a pirate and all of that who won't hesitate to keelhaul. (Probably wouldn't keelhaul the person he's clasping a necklace on, but the night is young, I guess.) Though, I fully stand by the fact that this particular character is because of 2003 Captain Hook, I do also think that you could imagine OUAT Hook or even 1990s Hook's Hook. (how many hooks could Hook hook if Hook's hook could hook hooks.) Either would translate well, but more Captain Hook in the movie Hook, because I believe that Dustin Hoffman's Hook is a natural progression of Jason Isaac's Hook. (Or if you want a Hiddleston Hook, you can imagine the Fairy Princess's James doing this. But you know he's reciting Shakespeare because he took one {1} class at Eton.)

Austria: (case for antagonist: Chibitalia segments. I'm bending the rules slightly, but I think I can make a case enough.) A nation? Oh, forgive me for going back to my most cringe of roots, but this is Tumblr and Hetalia had to be mentioned. The man is an aristocrat. But of course Roderich's sitting down Elizaveta and combing his musician's fingers through her hair before he clasps a necklace on. (Bonus points if Prussia is mocking him through a window.) He's pragmatic, and clandestine, almost like Henry Jekyll, but where Jekyll is restrained due to Victorian repression, Austria is just that sort of Young Master type to be high and mighty about clasping a necklace on someone. However, his musician's fingers are nimble, and he's tailing them over shoulders and collars.

Edward Hyde: I think I'll end the list with Edward Hyde. In all honestly, I don't know how long he's around to be able to do The Necklace ThingTM, as he mostly prowls at night. But if Jekyll would, Hyde would. It's harried and messy, and he's grabbing (probably Lucy) and pulling laughing with That LookTM in his eyes. Is it a necklace that's already being worn? Or is it one he's stolen? But either way his hands are around a neck and he's leaning in close, his cheek nearly pressing against hers, whispering that he's always near. His fingers are cold on the shoulder... it's overwhelming and intoxicating. There are no repressions with Hyde. (Also, I'm not sure if TGS, Hyde would do the Necklace ThingTM. I have read I think all of the webcomic, but I've not made up my mind about the thing.) I believe MazM's Hyde would, and he's getting a separate mini mention. He's clasping a necklace on while the other is seated, because like Preminger, he's a short king. No matter the adaptation (not March and I don't know Tracey's well enough) there is the distinct element of danger. If one is afraid of Hook keelhauling, then one would be doubly afraid of the cane that Edward carries. Just don't be a hypocrite in his eyes. (You're getting a gif from the NBA I Love this Game commercial because there were far too many gifs of Hasselhoff. Also, if somebody has a clear gifset from the 1995/96, Pre-Broadway Tour, I'd love you forever and make you mac n cheese.)

Those who didn't make the list, but deserve a little shout out:

Paxton, from the episode of Sliders called Heavy Metal (I don't make the rules. Pirates almost always get a Necklace ThingTM pass. (And you know, he *starts* as an antagonist in the episode. I am bending the rules for him and his swooshy hair.)

Lucius Malfoy. Aristocratic and old fashioned. I debated adding him to the main list, but I didn't know if it was too much tbh. You'd find this in fanfic for sure, but I'm not so sure if I can warrant him being on this main list.

Jel Omiata. He's not an antagonist and I had to take him off the list. I had a full write-up for him and everything. (Even if you believe he's the Bahari Bay Ripper, that's still head canon and definitely not enough to warrant him making an antagonist list. Sorry. I know.)

I think this is about all I can think of currently. If I think of more, I'll make a second post

[rarespawnwrites]

Hey, WIP Wednesday is a thing, right?

Maybe I can make it my thing? Let's find out.

Red Hood Steph, anyone?

~

Age 20

One moment, Stephanie Brown slept, sprawled out like a starfish in her underwear on a hotel boxspring mattress. The next, the bed vanished from beneath her and she thumped gracelessly to the floor with a startled yelp.

Her eyes opened to find themselves looking once more through her helmet’s display, and she didn’t need to look to know she was once again in full Red Hood get-up. She could hear the wind and the uncomfortably close pattering of raindrops. She sighed deeply, staring at the ceiling of the now empty, decrepit room, then tilted her head to see the wall to the outside missing. Old scorch marks and a wrecked exterior revealed the location to have been victim to explosive force at some point.

The air was damp. It was raining. It was always raining in Gotham.

Stephanie lay where she’d fallen, unmoving on the dirty floor of what was now an abandoned hotel. “Good morning to you too, universe,” she drawled.

She should get up, figure out the lay of the land of this new Gotham. Hide from whatever version of the bats existed here before the energy spike from the dimension shift lured them over. With her luck, they’d be vampires again. She’d just finished decapitating her evil vampire self.

‘...Five more minutes,’ she decided, and closed her eyes.

Exhaustion pulled her back into a fitful doze and she drifted. The sensation of being exposed kept her jerking back to awareness every few minutes, but her hyper-vigilance frequently kept her in this cycle, so she’d take what she could get.

The uncomfortable half-sleep seemed to drag on for an eternity, and yet it still wasn’t long enough before it was interrupted.

Adrenaline spiked and her eyes shot open just before thuds to her left signaled the impact of feet onto the nearby floor. Two figures stood at the wrecked entrance of the room, the low light giving her minimal details without turning her night vision on. Not worth the glow that would give away her state of consciousness. Both newcomers were capes, though only the shorter one was actually wearing a cape. Stephanie’s armor hid her sudden tension, so she kept her breathing deep and slow.

‘If I stay reeeal still, maybe they won’t see me,’ she thought wryly.

“Is that—” there was a choked-off noise from the taller figure. “Why does he have...?!” The sputtering voice was only vaguely familiar. His outline was too slim to be Damian, but too tall and well-built to be the rich kid. The timbre of his voice was an adult’s, anyway. Not Duke’s, though. One of the extended family?

Oh, wait. If she was picking up on the subtext of this guy’s freak-out correctly, they’d expected the Red Hood to be a guy. That meant gender swap or a sidekick remix.

“Might be an imitator,” another voice suggested, “but no one’s had eyes on Red Hood all night.” That voice she recognized. Teenaged. Wiz kid vibe. Sharp enunciation.

‘Ugh,’ she thought. ‘The rich kid.’ No matter how mixed up or messed up the universe, there he was: the Bat’s third Shadow. She could only see him in her periphery, but it looked like he was fiddling with something in his hands. Probably getting readings off the residual energy in the area.

“Magic transformation?” he theorized. “Time-traveling successor?” His fidgeting paused as he eyed her still form. “Hey, is she dead?”

The other one stepped closer and dropped to a knee, giving her a clearer view of him. Shaggy dark hair; movie star cheekbones; domino; minimal armor on a striped bodysuit. ‘Nightnight or something. Night Knight?’ She hadn’t really interacted with him in the one version of Gotham she’d seen him in. She wasn’t sure he even existed in her home dimension.

“No,” he called out. “She’s breathing. Just unconscious. And my money’s on ‘brainwashed into thinking she’s the real one.’” His hand went to his utility belt.

Bats were predictable. Even a bat Stephanie was only vaguely aware existed. That’s why she was ready when Nightguy came at her with a syringe filled with what she presumed was a sedative so she could be moved to a secure location.

The lenses on her helmet blinked on, startling him while the hand closest to him snapped up and gripped the side of his hand. In the same movement, she twisted to pull herself up and into his space before shoving his neck with her other forearm, using his resistance to get her feet under her. With a slide and a shift, she got a good angle to push his head down and hopped over him, giving him a good kick as she passed to give herself momentum.

“Nice to meet you too, pretty-boy,” she called over her shoulder as she fled. Her voice came out monotone and tinny through the modulation of her helmet, but she liked to think it added personality.

After the last couple months of world-hopping, Stephanie had learned to infer what relationship the bats had with their local Red Hood based on their reception toward a new one showing up. This group had thought there was a possibility she was a magically transformed version of their original. Immediately trying to ensure she stayed unconscious while they moved her… well, that was a pretty blatant hint this world’s Red Hood wasn’t in on like… family dinners or game nights. Whatever the good little boys and girls did when they didn’t have the kind of “troubled history” that put them on the outs with Bruce.

Nah, he was like her. Guilty until proven innocent.

She tried not to take this Nightguy’s approach personally, even if she definitely took it extremely personally.

‘Wow, Bruce raises ONE murderous assassin child, and suddenly every kid with a shady background is a potential villain.’ To be fair, both Damian and Stephanie were, in fact, categorized as villains. And these days, Stephanie could also be categorized as a murderous assassin.It was possible Bruce had a point. But Stephanie was pretty sure it never paid to be fair to a billionaire, much less Bruce Wayne.

Fuck that guy.

[casualmelody]

Spider Demon Headcanons

So I don’t like how spider demons of LMK got thrown to the side and I am here to make headcanons on how I believe they work: - Slightly acidic saliva to help break down food faster - Hybrid Spider Demons have all-sharp teeth (Syntax) - Might have a paralysis venom similar to Komodo Dragons (the longer they bite the more the effects. A few seconds = paralysis, a few more = transformation, but too long and the body gets overloaded with venom and begins to freak out and eventually die) - Spiders have a specific language consisting of clicks and chirps that no one but them understands - Spiderlings exclusively speak in chirps, coos, and clicks because they're too widdle to be able to speak mortal words so this is more effective, though if translated it would be simple phrases like 'I want food' 'Don't like that' 'Want that' etc -Baby spiders are called spoods as an affectionate nickname. I don't make the rules - Spiderling venom can be more fatal since they don't have regulation on the venom output of their bites - Venom does not affect fellow spider demons - They can climb walls/ceilings easily and webbing is about as effective as Spider Man's, though if it's shot out like Spider Man's I'm not sure (not sure I want to know) - Spiderlings have the ability to purr, and no one's gotten brave enough to try petting an adult spider demon to see if they purr as well - High likelihood they can withstand raw meat, though it's not advised - The eyes glow in the dark in the same way colors appear in UV lighting, meaning they can see in the dark - Spiders are very stealthy - Though they can sleep in human beds, most spider demons prefer to use the pillows and blankets to make a sort of nest to sleep in, especially if they're ill - A heavily matriarchal society - Very tight-knit community, the colony is one massive family and everyone has tabs on each other - Though we only see one colony, it's very likely that high-ranking nobles (Princes, Dukes) would head other colonies in the Queen's stead since she can't be everywhere at once - There's likely a Daycare area for the spiderlings, while the spider demons aren't an R-Species the very energetic and agile spiderlings need constant monitoring to make sure they don't get up to shenanigans. What year they get their own room is prooobably about six years old? Or so? Whenever they learn not to chew on furniture. - AFAB spiders have fangs, AMAB spiders have lower tusks. Spiders who want to transition can theoretically get their fangs/tusks removed, but some keep the teeth anyway - Based on the species of the spider they can have certain markings across their bodies, as well as their skin being varying shades of purple - Purebred spider demons have multiple limbs, most likely six arms? Retractable like Stitch's from Lilo & Stitch - Purebred spiders are Really Fucking Tall (7 ft tall being the norm for them) - Purebreds also have six eyes - The artificially created spider demons (Huntsman and Goliath) theoretically could look just like purebreds, but with the Queen having very limited resources the two look ended up looking rather malnourished in comparison, even the Warrior Spider

[anitaaro04]

Larry Oneshot???

This is my first time finishing and publishing one of this “stories” sooo i’m giving this a chance.

Enjoy! :)

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

"Harry?" The voice, eerily familiar to Louis, echoed in his head. "Harry!”

Harry jumped from his seat on the velvet-draped couch, a furious blush darting across his cheeks as he realized what he had been doing. Holy shit he thought, his eyes widening as he stared at his best friend's dressed-up form. The attire suited him too perfectly. The dark material of the shirt hugged every muscle of his arms, while the shoulder pads gleamed in the faint light from the window. The white pants fit his thighs and arse nicely. Harry simply couldn’t look away. Which…

What the fuck.

He let out a gasp, covering his eyes with his hands. A crimson red coated the entirety of his face and neck at this point. Summoning courage, he peeked between his fingers. The bewildered look on his best mate's face, glancing from his pedestal where the tailor took the suit measurements, would have been the funniest thing Harry had ever seen. He would've laughed, but too fucking confused and embarrassed.

He had been checking his best friend out.

"What the fuck," Harry whispered, he had never done that before. Harry and Louis had been friends since they were three and five. They grew up together, Louis being the crown prince of Estibria and Harry being the son of the King’s right-hand man, the duke of Ivena. Queen Johanna was more than enchanted that Louis could have a friend close to his age, especially since his sister, Charlotte, was just a babe so they couldn’t play together. ("No, mamma, I will not play with my baby sister because she is a baby.”) They were partners in crime, creating havoc in the hallways and chaos in the kitchen and library. Louis was the troublemaker of the two, always involving innocent Harry in his shenanigans, not that Harry was as innocent as he claimed himself to be. A menace, they were. Inseparable, like salt and pepper, the perfect combo, the dream team.

"Haz, mate, you’re worrying me," Louis's voice cut through his train of thought. Harry blinked himself awake. The couturier was removing the small sewing pins from the prince’s body so he could change. Harry cleared his suddenly dry throat.

"I’m fine, just peachy," He choked. He was freaking out on the inside. How could he explain to his best friend that he had been ogling him? Louis let out a small chuckle, lowering himself from the pedestal once the couturier was done, adjusting his cuffs now that the fitting process was over. Harry followed Louis with his eyes as he walked across the room and settled on the couch next to him, swallowing nervously at the proximity. He met Louis's curious, piercing blue eyes with unease. A spark of amusement danced across them.

"Who’s the lucky girl?" Louis asked, stunning Harry's racing mind, probably trying to guess friend’s nervous breakdown. Louis rested his face on his palm, looking through his lashes. Harry realized with a start that Louis did this often, looking through his lashes, perhaps subconsciously.

"No one," Harry choked again, unable to maintain eye contact. Instead, his eyes darted around the room, searching for an excuse to change the subject. The resting room was impecable as always. The white, tall walls with gold trims. Paintings portraits of past royals, and hanging candles filled the spaces in them. The high ceiling and golden chandelier that lit up the center of the room, with equal golden trims with beautiful designs. The tall windows were covered in golden curtains that let the natural sunlight sip through, illuminating most of the room. In the center of the room, an old rug filled most of the room’s floor, a monogamy table filled with Louis books and forgotten papers stood on top of it. Besides the door sat a tall grandfather clock, a relic Louis insists he despises, but Harry knew the boy loved secretly.

Before Louis could answer, his mouth hanging open, the wooden doors of the room opened, revealing Queen Jay and her best friend Lady Anne (Harry’s mamma) laughing between themselves. Both boys stood from the couch and bowed to the royal. It was a tradition they grew up with, it didn’t matter who the royal was related to they always needed to be bowed to. Louis did it with his parents but with no one else. Anne tried to inculcate Harry to bow even to Louis, but it was in vane when Louis insisted countless times for Harry not to bow to him. They fell back into the couch with a sigh when they saw both women turn back to their conversation. They looked at each other before bursting out laughing. Harry saw Louis’s corners of the eyes crinkle, blushing lightly. He was beautiful.

“Harry, dear, did you decide what to do for your twentieth birthday?” the Queen’s voice snapped Harry out of his daze. He blushed again, this time a little mortified, when his mum looked at him with knowing eyes and a subtle smile. He shook his head at Jay’s question. He opened his mouth to answer but Louis cut him off.

“Haz here said he wanted to spend it with just close friends and family, which boring” Harry snorted, rolling his eyes at his friend’s antics. Jay let out a sigh, a small chuckle escaping her lips.

“Boo bear, stop bothering poor Harry.” a small grumble sounded in Harry’s right at the nickname, it made Harry snicker. “If he wants a small thing he shall have it. However, I must agree with my son on this. This is your first official exposure to society as a man of your class and future duke of Ivena. You need to start getting more serious on what you want and who you will marry, son. We also need a bit more fun around here. Since Louis’ twentieth second birthday, the castle has felt a bit grey.”

Harry felt a shiver run up his back. Marriage has always been a topic nobody chose to discuss so outwardly. Louis always complained about his mother’s insistence for him to marry a girl someday, but no one has asked Harry anything about marriage being in his cards. He always assumed that when the time came, his mum or the Queen would have the lucky girl waiting for him. He had never thought that he had to chose someone one day. To be fair, now that he thought about it, he never even pictured himself with a girl by his side. When he thought of spending the rest of his life with someone, he thought of Louis. Harry felt himself blush once again.

“He’s been doing this all afternoon. Honestly, it’s starting to get really annoying.” Harry felt pairs of eyes on him when he blinked himself away. He cleared his throat, then he realized what his friend said. Swallowing the small pang of hurt, he pushed his friend aside, standing up upon telling the time from the grandfather clock.

“Ladies, I must excuse myself from the room. Annieth must be waiting for me in my room and I cannot leave my lady hanging.” Harry bowed to them, ignoring Louis’ protests. He walked towards the door, not before hearing his friend huff.

“A cat is not a lady, you moron. You barely even are.” Harry turned around to find him rolling his eyes, a playful smirk adorning his pink lips. For the nth time of the day, Harry felt himself blushing. He rolled his eyes back, turning back around and showing the finger in his friend’s general direction. He heard his mum and Jay protest and Louis cackle behind him as he left the door.

Shit he needed to find a solution to his Louis problem and quick.

[wonderlandleighleigh]

77 Thoughts While Rewatching Supernatural 11x04: Baby

Let’s gooooooo!

1. There are, thankfully, behind the scenes photos of Jensen in those shorts. But we were robbed of Dean in his “It’s a free bunker” daisy dukes.

2. But the conceit of this episode is so great. I remember watching it for the first time and being floored and how personal it felt.

3.And the little details we see in the car that we know are there. The army man. The initials and the leggos. Just. Ugh. The great thing about having a show run this long is that there’s so much history to draw from.

4. Guitar Man playin.

5. I love that Sam just pitches in with washing Baby. Like it’s a normal thing they do together. Maybe Cas helps sometimes too.

6. And the transition from Dean spraying down the car to the rain. So good. Dangit.

7. It’s 21 hours from Lebanon, Kansas to Oregon. I always forget how long the distances they go are, because the show condenses the drives. But holy fuck that is so long.

8. LOL Sam and his smoothies. “Where’s the rest of the beer?!” Hahahaha it’s such a typical little brother move, and even Sam’s face reads “oh shit big brother mad.”

9. I love how protective they are of Cas. They really do both love him. They want him to heal.

10. Cas just cruising through Netflix. You know that at some point Dean snuck into Sam’s room and fucked with his Netflix algorithm.

11. I love this scene at the Roadhouse. “Actually she never texted me back.” For as handsome and adorable as Dean is, he’s still such a doof, and you know what? Sometimes potential romantic interests just ghost him.

12. The time lapse here is brilliant. It keeps us in the car, but also, like... we don’t need to see them hookin’ up. That’s personal.

13. “Mistakes were made. Mhm.”

14. HOW DID SAM FIT IN THE BACK SEAT WITH THAT WOMAN?! HE IS SO TALL! SHE DOES NOT LOOK SHORT! WHAT THE FUCK IS THE IMPALA A SEX TARDIS?

15. “Don’t Night Moves me.” I love this part. And! Night Moves appears in two of my favorite shows: This, and The OC.

16. And any time we get to hear Dean sing is a great time. He CAN sing. He pretends he can’t for various reasons, but he so can.

17. The montage is great, too, of them in the car. Just livin.

18. Again, having such a long run means we get to see these life moments that are just wonderful. Between the blood and the tragedy. They eat burgers in teh car and sing songs. They drive. 

19. “We got tonight, who needs tomorrow?” I feel like Dean would make a great D and D bard, you know?

20. And this conversation they have about that Apple Pie life is good, too. That Sam would still like it. That’s Dean’s...just not sure it’s for him. He tried it once, and it blew up in his face. Add to that that he has Cas now. So...

21. I need to talk to you about this Judy Collins song. It was, according to Dream!John, one of Mary’s favorite songs, and it just...feels right. One of the only things that bummed me out about The Winchesters was that we didn’t get a callback to this song in the show.

“I would follow him right down The toughest road I know  Someday soon Goin’ with him someday”

22. It’s such a great departure from the harder classic rock that winds up in the show as being very much John’s music. We get something softer that’s Mary’s. Something that maybe the boys took comfort in when their father would put it on, knowing it was something she loved.

23. ROBBIE JUDY COLLINS CALLBACK WHEN! ROBBIE! ROBBIE PLEASE!

24. But also Matt Cohen really is amazing as a younger John Winchester. He really channels Jeffrey Dean Morgan in a tender way here. I love it.

25. Sam’s face. He’s so freaked out. Like.

26. Hey season 11! Before Jared stopped trying and started phoning it in! We love to see it.

27. “When has death ever stopped a Winchester.” oh John. You have no idea.

28. “You played your part.” Poor Sam. John was so checked out. The level of neglect both Sam and Dean suffered is really extreme.

29.The lack of music here with just the sounds of the road and the car is really great here. So tense.

30. Another great conversation between these two. I think because Dean is such a goof sometimes, it’s easy to discount his big brotherness. Sam is constantly playing the straight man. Here, we get to see Dean do some big time big brothering.

31. I love the lighting, here too. It would be easy to have it be super dark, but it’s great that they use street lights to illuminate everything.

32. LOL Dean and Sam keeping secrets. after a while, that was kind of the whole show, wasn’t it? Just Dean and Sam not telling each other shit and hurting each other like dummies.

33. “I read.” HE DOES! Way back in season 4, Sam found a Vonnegut in his bag.

34. There’s a SPN official novel called Nevermore where Dean does not know who Edgar Allen Poe is, and upon reading that I was so much, I never tried to read it again. Fuck you, Dean knows his lit. He plays dumb, he’s not actually dumb.

35. Dean’s dream about John hits me hard now, after The Winchesters season 1 finale, because in that universe that Dean futzed with? That dream could now be a reality.

36. “Perfect landing, Son.”

37. Sam dreaming about Mary is a whole thing, too. Of that person he can’t remember. Ouch.

38. That overhead shot of them is so great. Love it.

39. Werepire! oh Dean.

40. Meatman cometh.

41. The minor freakout over valet parking lol.

42. But with good reason.

43. But also girl me too. Let’s be real, who wouldn’t? It’s a great car. And this is a great moment.

44. She was definitely doing donuts. I love it.

45. Dean would shit himself if he knew.

46. This entire scene is so good. But also, I love Dean and Cas here.

47. LOL step away from the Netflix.

48. Dean, stop trying to make fetch happen, bud.

49. Poor Cas, talking to himself, thinking he’s helping. But again, it keeps us in the car.

50. But this whole scene is so great.

51. Poor Dean missed him saying werepire.

52. I love this fight scene so much. It’s played for laughs and it works so well. It is so gory.

53. “It turns out I did shoot the deputy.” I need you to know that I SCREAMED when he said this, because it’s an add-on from a joke made in SEASON 3. 3! THEY WRAPPED THAT JOKE EIGHT YEARS LATER! Again, it’s the benefits of a show that goes this long.

54. Poor Cas. Just...having to sit on the phone while carnage happens on the other end.

55. The windshield wiper. Dean is so unfazed.

56. Poor cooler. It went from beer and smoothies to a monster head.

57. Again, Dean is so not bothered by any of this. It’s just another day, and it makes it so much funnier. Like he knows it’s gross, but like. It’s just another workday.

58. I’m not sure about these extreme closeups. It’s a lot.

59. “What bench?” oh Cas. <3

60. Sam getting distracted with the fiirty and Dean getting jumped. Again.

61. HEAD IN A BOX.

62. They just left that head in the backseat with a woman he thought was like a full blown human. Because they’re that desensitized. Head in a box. “Yeah? And?”

63. “You do anything for your family.” Oh boy.

64. Sam just not noticing a damn thing.

65. Dean face down in the back seat, sees the Hello Kitty bag: “How did...I don’t wanna know.”

66. The monsters are scared.

67. Dean’s in a tough spot here, and he’s just rolling his eyes at this monster monologueing. It’s part “Are you fucking kidding me with this shit? I can’t believe I let this happen, why am I so dumb?” and part “Bitch do you know what I am? Get wrecked.”

68. Poor Baby. God she is beat up.

69. this inside/outside the car fight is great too. I love that we don’t need to see like a big full fight scene. It’s so cramped and so cool.

70. Fucking decapitated with the car door that is fucking brutal.

71. “Oh baby I’m so sorry.” Yeah dude your car is fucked.

72. Both Dean and Baby. So fucked up.

73. Jensen learned that car move on his lunch break. Talented bastard.

74. Sam also looking messed up.

75. “Would you mind starting tomorrow?” Oh Sam.

76. And we end on Night Moves as the boys and Baby limp on home.

77. Truly, one of my all time favorite episodes of this show. Shot so cleverly, with great character moments and glimpse at what’s going on with the larger season-long plot. Love it.

[baekhvuns]

OMG HELLO BAEKSSS!!!

It has been such a long time 😭

I have SAUR much to tell you!

Ok first of all let's start with how I got a part time job as a second year student and 😭 THERE'S THIS GUY THERE AND MY FREAKING MIND CANNOT COMPREHEND HIS BEAUTY! Like istg he looks like a mix of yunho and soobin?? His lips are an exact copy of soobin's! (Don't ask why il abt his lips-) And obviously he's so tall. (The part-time job is at a restaurant btw) and when I tell you he's probably the reason so many people even come to that restaurant like I'm not saying all of them but I'm sure half the portion of them high school girls 😭 but I kinda feel lonely there since I'm bad at socialising but dw I'm working on that.

My phone just acted up- anyways, it acted up again 😭 so I was saying i read those asks regarding the whole ff thing. And y'all aren't wrong, Bcz these days the plot is porn 😃. I mean have you seen those fic with tons of warning at hand that's just a collection of kinks 😭 and the whole bsf's dad trope??? Like atp y'all require grass! Or maybe a whole dang rainforest!

But other than that I reread your fics just to feel something 🥹 and yes I'm positive I felt something Bcz now I'm lovesick. Someone send me my Mr Park, my bg, MY DUKEEE 😭 oh I also dedicated one song to each of the hwa fics, (even tho I've read the other members fics, ...hwa just hits diff.) Okokok! Pls don't judge my music taste tho 😩 [the way I said one nd gv out a whole playlist smh]

Rewrite the stars- if I didn't put rewrite the stars, the greatest showman I'd be considered a criminal! You belong with me too!!

The trouble with hating you- ok ok so Polaroid love for the whole happy moments but then she's in the rain by The Rose for when hwa breaks yn's heart and aurora (Ateez)

Mr and Mrs park- MAMA IM IN LOVE WITH A CRIMINAL 😩 Britney spearsss and i discovered a new song that's called "old love" by Yuji and boi, i get flashbacks to that confession scene! Bambi (baekhyun), mhm (kai) and peaches were made for this, OK HEAR ME OUT FILTER BY JIMIN-

Duke and the general- I GOT SO MANY!!

- day and night (Jung seung hwan)

-But it's destiny (10cm)

-breaking down (Ailee)

-lover (TS)

-My everything (Ariana Grande)

I could go on-

Khronos- Tears, trauma o wait one last time by Ariana, young and beautiful Lana del rey, stay with me (chanyeol and punch) all about you (Ateez) euphoria too

Just friends- ohhh lemme whip my nsfw song playli-

-circus (Britney mother spears)

-Angel eyes (ABBA)

-into you (Ariana)

- they don't know about us (1D)

- luxurious (Gwen Stefani)

- pillow talk (Zayn) AHEM-

- love talk (wayv) AHEEMMM

-cream soda (exo) aiahwjahsjsj

-Candy (baekhyun) AGH-

Ok but in the end we never knew if yn and hwa got married but like imagine if they had decided to and they hv their kids! Like the leading models get married and just think THE VISUAL hwayoung would hv (I mean I obv don't mean I'm the yn 😭) and then yn takes her for a red carpet or something when she's like 9 or 10 and then we see hwayoung directly after like 10 yrs and everyone is shocked Bcz she has the genes of her mother with the personality of her father THAT'D BE SO DOPE!

Let's not fall in love again- OK GET READY FOR THIS!

-Everytime (chen, punch)

-love sight (TXT)

-I think I'm in love again (kat dahlia) I love the irony, Bcz I also know this is what went thru hwa's brain

- I will go to you like the first snow (Ailee)

- love me like that (Sam Kim)

Bodyguard- but idk why I'd like to put some 00's nd 10s songs here bcz....it's just the vibe!

-OMG I WANT IT THT WAY 😭😭 idkw but it fits acc to me

- you drive me crazy (Britney again...I luv her sm :') )

- all of me (John legend)

- dandelions (ruth b)

- serendipity (jimin)

-a lot like love (baek a yoon)

Somehow bg's ones are kinda soft? Idk 😭but yeah this was fun to do! I love doing these things for ffs, like you'd do with movies or novels! And i hope you enjoy these too 😩🤧 anyways it's like 1:00 AM, and my phone screen feels a little too bright for my eyes 😭 gnn and bye hope you're taking care of yourselves! 💕💕💕

HELLO t’s been a while!!

omg???? a part time AND at a restaurant as a second year student?? swap places right now idc idc idc & OH??? that’s a very interesting thing u shared, when r we making the moves 🔫 chaerss u have a very y/n job, you gotta bring out your y/n-ness in these situations like ITS NEARING THE HOLIDAYS U NEVER KNOW

ur correct, i was scrolling thru some atz fics yesterday to see abt to read and all the disclaimers were: angry, handcuffs, pissed off reader x pissed off member or name calling or every kink in existence what happened to HI?? HELLO??? A RAINFOREST LMFAOOO,,, crying u guys r so nice it makes me so happy to see that u guys really enjoy the fics to the whole 😭😭 i will be back pls im defrosting!!

LMFAOOOO OKAY IM READY BC I ALSO HAD MY LISTS FROM WHEN I WROTE THESE FICS!! omg the rewrite the stars one is absolutely correct, it’s what i listened to every time i wrote that fic!

omg wait ur kinda right that fits the trouble w hating u,, i used classic by mkto for the funsies! WAIT FUCK THAT CRIMINAL FITS MR AND MRS PARK SO WELL FHWKDHWKHDKW I ALSO USED HIM & I BY HALSEY AND GEASY & IM YOURS BY ISABEL LAROSA!! duke and his general never had a song lost but i agree with everything up there 🤚🏻

omg khronus??? i used moon lovers ost the most, my love my lee hi and davichi’s songs, insterstellar BUT YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL??? KILL ME RIVHT NOW FJWKFHEK this was my playlist for khronus

WAIT THEY DONT KNOW ABOUT US WAS A BODYGUARD HWA SONG + you & i FBWKDHK,,, just friends had the most fashion and nsfw songs, the weeknd, just friends by virginia to vegas, say it right nelly furtado, rich girl by gwen stefani, i like me better lauv, OH PILLOW TALK??? 👀 omg no bc i have a whole universe for them and ur right on track no bc imagine the two top models of the industry getting married like??? crazy i know the kids would be crazy tall too and the GENES??? wow i will draft a fic just u wait

STOP THAT LETS NOT FALL IN LOVE IS SO ACCURATE STOP IT FBKWBDKS IM IN LOVE AGAIN WAS MY SHIT!

omg no i love these i love hearing the thoughts on the different stories & what ppl think their future would be like esp for just friends, the entire industry at their wedding??? iM THERE hope u had a good sleep!! thank u for sending this in 💓

[hollyoongs]

𝐇𝐄𝐄-𝐏𝐎𝐎𝐋'𝐒 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐈𝐓 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍! || (𝗲𝗻- 𝗰𝘂 𝘀𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀)

"Tell me where your fucking boss is or you're going to die! In five minutes!"

SYNOPSIS: 7 guys that have the power to change the world for good in a unique way, sure they can mess the whole city they are battling or end in another universe, but one thing is sure, they will always comeback home for some love.

PAIRING: Deadpool!Heeseung x Computer Science Worker!reader (the reader is fem bodied) || GENRE: smut, crack || W.C: +4.2k || TRIGGER WARNING: lots of cursing, Heeseung is a menace but he's in love, is somebody gonna match their freak fr, Hee gets fucked with his masked on, oral (f), knife play, blood play (but it's like for a second), dark humour, knife licking, dirty talk, petnames (slut), bratty reader, dom Heeseung, slapping, cowgirl, unprotect sex (there's no party without a birthday hat)

Once upon a time, there was this asian young adult called Heeseung, who saves those in need and rescued cats on tall trees...

Yeah, I'm breaking your bubble right now because we are not starting like that.

Heeseung sat on his favorite bar stool, nursing ramen and whiskey with delight. The bar was as lively as ever, filled with mercenaries and ne'er-do-wells. But tonight, Heeseung felt particularly chatty, and his friend, Jake, had to pay for it.

"Hey, Jake," Heeseung called to the bartender. "You ever wonder why ramen is so darn delicious?"

Jake, used to his friend's random musings, didn't even look up. "Nope. Just you, buddy."

Heeseung took a dramatic bite at his plate. "You sound like my girl so much, but hear me out. It's the perfect balance of sticky, cheesy, and spicy, my friend. It's like a symphony in my mouth, with a full brass section and everything."

Jake rolled his eyes. "You know, some people come here to forget their problems, not to hear about yours."

"Touché, mon frère," Heeseung said, tipping an imaginary hat. "But speaking of problems, did I ever tell you about the time I had to fight a gang of mutant chickens?"

Before Shim could respond, the bar door swung open, and a man in a suit walked in, looking around nervously. He spotted Heeseung and made a beeline for him.

"Deadpool?" the man asked, his voice trembling slightly.

Heeseung turned, his eyes lighting up behind his mask. He recognized the man by heart; it was your caring boss, the father figure you never had, and his white shirt covered with blood and his injuries made everybody in that bar turn their heads around. "Why yes, it is I, the Merc with a Mouth, the Sultan of Sarcasm, the Duke of Deadliness. How can I help you, my good man?"

The man fidgeted, clearly out of his element. "I need your help. I was working, and a gang of thugs kidnapped people from the computer science team of my company. They’re demanding a ransom I can’t afford, and the police think it's a fucking joke because of all the prank calls similar to this situations."

Heeseung's playful demeanor instantly shifted to serious. "Alright, buddy. Give me the details. You have names?"

"Yes, I do." The man was so nervous that Heeseung had to take off his hands the two small pieces of paper, both of which crumpled, one with an address and another with the names of the people they took. His eyes widen when he sees your pretty name in the bloody paper, anger boiling in his body. "Please, help me."

Heeseung nodded, his tone now deadly calm despite how he was feeling. "Don't worry. Deadpool's on the case. And hey, if we save them before bedtime, I'll throw in a free ramen cup."

The man looked confused but grateful. "Thank you, Deadpool. I don't know how to repay you."

Wade patted him on the shoulder. "Just tell everyone you meet about the amazing exploits of Deadpool. And maybe buy my action figure. It's got twelve points of articulation!"

Heeseung finished his whiskey in one swift gulp, then hopped off the barstool with a theatrical flourish. "Jake, keep my seat warm. I'll be back with a side of justice."

Jake smirked, shaking his head. "Try not to burn down the city this time."

"No promises," Heeseung quipped, grabbing his katanas from behind the bar. With a dramatic spin, he headed out the door, the man in the suit trailing nervously behind him.

The address led them to an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of town, the kind of place where bad things happened in every action movie ever made. Heeseung crouched behind a rusty dumpster, peeking around the corner.

"Stay here," he whispered to the man, who nodded vigorously.

Heeseung crept closer to the building, his senses on high alert. The sound of muffled voices and the flicker of dim lights guided him to a side entrance. He slipped inside, moving like a shadow through the darkened corridors.

As he approached a large room, he could hear the thugs laughing and taunting their captives. Heeseung's grip tightened on his katanas. He peeked around the corner and saw the gang—a motley crew of heavily armed goons. And there, tied to chairs in the center of the room, were the kidnapped employees, including you.

Heeseung's heart skipped a beat when he saw you, bruised but defiant, your eyes meeting his with a mixture of relief and determination as he saw you completely tied up from head to toe. He gave you a reassuring nod before stepping into the room with a dramatic flair.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!" Heeseung announced, his voice echoing through the warehouse. "The entertainment has arrived!"

The thugs turned, confusion turning to anger as they recognized the masked intruder. "Who the hell are you?" one of them growled, raising his gun.

"Deadpool," Heeseung said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "But you can call me friendly neighborhood Deadpool. And I'm here to kick ass and eat ramen—and I'm all out of ramen."

With a blur of motion, Heeseung launched himself at the nearest thug, his katanas slicing through the air with deadly precision. Chaos erupted as the gang members scrambled to respond, but Heeseung was a whirlwind of steel and fury, taking them down one by one.

Heeseung was in front of you fighting for his life. You turned your head and shut your eyes when you saw the katana going directly to one of the thugs head and felt the blood splash on you. Heeseung turned around, and you could see his eyes moving up and down on you.

"Damn, your tits look awesome when you get tied up."

Your eyes widened at your boyfriend's unexpected (but pretty normal at this point) comment, but before you could react, he was back to fighting, his katanas flashing in the dim light. In the midst of the melee, your boss managed to free you from the ropes, taking you to a safe place with the rest of your coworkers. The remaining thugs, realizing they were outmatched, tried to flee, but Heeseung was faster. In a matter of minutes, the warehouse was silent, except for the groans of the defeated gang members.

Heeseung wiped his katanas clean on one of the thug's jackets, then sheathed them with a flourish. He turned to you, a wide grin visible even under his mask. "Well, that was fun. How's everyone holding up?"

Your boss stumbled forward, looking both terrified and amazed. "I… I can't believe you did it. Thank you, Deadpool."

"Ah, just another day at the office," Heeseung said, waving off his gratitude as all of you heard the police sirens. When the police entered, they were shocked to see every thug down and bleeding. A police officer saw Heeseung and pointed him with the gun, him still walking to the entrance.

"What the fuck have you done?!"

"Your job."

The officer's face twisted in frustration, but he lowered his gun. Heeseung, ever the showman, gave a mocking salute before heading out of the warehouse. You followed closely behind, your heart still pounding from the adrenaline, and for an interogation of them, taking two hours of it and Heeseung waiting in the darkness.

Outside of the police department, the night air felt cool against your skin, a stark contrast to the chaos inside. You found Heeseung without his suit. He turned to you, his eyes softening. "Are you okay?" he asked, his voice gentler than you'd ever heard it.

You nodded, still trying to process everything. "Yeah, thanks to you."

Heeseung chuckled, his playful demeanor returning. "Well, you know me. I can't resist a damsel in distress. Or, in your case, a badass who just happened to get kidnapped."

You rolled your eyes but couldn't help the smile that tugged at your lips. "You have the worst timing with compliments, you know that? But yeah, Heepool's did it again."

Heeseung shrugged with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "It's part of my charm."

The man in the suit approached you two, looking immensely relieved and frowining at the view of the couple. "Someone saw Deadpool?"

"Ah, no." Heeseung replied. "But he told me to tell you to remember to buy his action figure. And maybe a ramen cup or two."

"You bet my future action figure that I'll. Also, take the week off, don't go to work." The man gave a shaky laugh when he saw your happy face after the news of your free week, then hurried back to check on the other employees. Heeseung turned back to you, his expression more serious now.

"Let's get you home," he said, slipping an arm around your shoulders. "I think we've both had enough excitement for one night."

Heeseung led you through the darkened streets, his arm a reassuring presence around your shoulders. The adrenaline from the night's events was starting to wear off, leaving you feeling drained and vulnerable. Heeseung seemed to sense this; his usual playful banter toned down to a comforting silence.

When you finally reached your apartment, he paused at the door, his eyes searching yours. "Are you sure you're okay?" he asked again, his concern evident.

You managed a small smile, appreciating his worry. "Yeah, I'm okay. I just need to process everything."

Heeseung nodded, then surprised you by leaning in and kissing your forehead. "If you need anything, I'm just a call away. Or a text. Or a smoke signal. You know, whatever works."

You laughed softly, the tension easing just a bit. "Thanks, Heeseung."

Heeseung went to his room, and you looked at his suit on top of the table. You took the mask to give it a look, and you put it on.

You took a moment to adjust the mask, its familiar texture pressing against your face. You felt an odd sense of comfort and security, as if channeling Heeseung's confidence through the simple act of wearing it.

Just then, Heeseung emerged from the bedroom, his eyes immediately locking on you, completly lying down on the sofa in a cocky pose. He stopped in his tracks, a slow grin spreading across his face. "Well, look at you, trying to steal my thunder," he teased, his tone playful.

You laughed, feeling a bit silly but also empowered. "Just seeing what it's like to be the hero for a change."

Heeseung stepped closer, his gaze intense as he took in the sight of you in his mask. "You wear it well," he said, his voice dropping to a husky whisper. "But there's one more thing you need to complete the look."

"And what's that supposed to be, Heeseung?"

With a swift, fluid motion, Heeseung pulled you into his arms, his hand uncovering your lips and his lips capturing yours in a passionate kiss. The intensity of his embrace took your breath away, his hands roaming possessively over your body. You melted into him, your own hands finding their way to the back of his neck and pulling him closer.

Heeseung's touch was electrifying, his fingers deftly exploring every inch of your skin. You could feel the heat radiating from him, his desire matching your own, as the kiss deepened, growing more urgent. He finally took your mask off your pretty face as he backed you towards the bed, his movements sure and determined. You stopped for a moment when you sensed his intent on leaving the mask in the living room.

"Take it. I've always wanted to be fucked by a super."

"Fucking hell, you're so done." He again attacked your lips with his messier and more passionate hands. Heeseung's hands slipped under your shirt, the feel of his skin against yours sending shivers down your spine. He broke the kiss just long enough to pull your shirt over your head, his eyes dark with lust as he took in the sight of you. "God, you're beautiful," he murmured, his voice rough with need.

You reached for him, pulling him back to you, your lips crashing together once more. His hands were everywhere, igniting a fire within you that demanded to be quenched. You could feel his hard muscles beneath your fingers; the raw strength of his body was a stark contrast to the tenderness in his touch.

With a growl of frustration, Heeseung tore his own shirt off when he threw you into his bed, his eyes never leaving yours. The sight of his bare chest and the defined lines of his muscles only fueled your desire. You reached for him, your hands tracing the contours of his body, feeling the heat and power that radiated from him.

Heeseung's hands moved to your jeans, deftly unbuttoning and sliding them down your legs. You kicked them off, your breath coming in ragged gasps as he pressed you back onto the bed. His lips followed, trailing hot kisses down your neck, your collarbone, and your stomach.

You arched into his touch, your body aching for his. Heeseung's fingers found their way to your pants, teasing and tormenting you until you were begging for him. With a wicked grin, he finally slid them off, leaving you completely exposed beneath him.

Heeseung took a moment to drink in the sight of you, his eyes filled with a mix of awe and desire. "You're perfect," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. You saw between your legs, thinking he told that to you, but he was looking at your pussy with love eyes and directly to your cunt.

He was talking to your pussy.

"Heeseung, for fuck sake."

"Silence; she likes when I praise her for being so wet for me." He was now lying in his stomach with his feet up, the palms of his hands being a support for his chin, while he looked at your throbbing cunt.

"I swear to God, Heeseung, if you don't do something, I'm leaving."

"God, you're so fucking needy. I love it." He took the back of your throat and pushed you to him, your lips attaching to your pussy in a way that made you scream like a pornstar.

Lee Heeseung was such a character, but you've been in love with him for two years and you still can't get used to his actions, but God, you were so into it.

He was eating you out with so much enthusiasm. You gripped the sheets beneath you while biting your lower lip, trying to control your volume, but Heeseung was making wonders with you. You could feel that familiar knot creating, and your back arched in pleasure, your eyes shutting down because of the overwhelming sensation.

"Fuck, Heeseung…"

"My pretty slut is going to cum?" You moaned in response. He slapped your tights, making you jump a little as he stood up. Finally,  taking the rest of his clothes off him and taking a small knife from his drawer, he took his mask and put it on, your eyes shinning in anticipation. 

"What are you doing now?"

"You said you wanted to get fucked by a super. I'm fucking you the Deadpool way." He went back to the bed, the blade of his knife on your chin as he raised your head with it, your eyes looking right at his through the mask. He knew by heart that he wouldn't even try to cut you, and he was actually a little doubtful if you would like it.

So what you did actually made him lose his mind.

You took his wrist, the one that held the knife, as you stuck out your tongue, licking the blade and making his breath get stuck in his throat as he watched your tongue going around the knife.

"Holy mother of God," you said with a silent laugh. "You're one hell of a surprise, aren't you?" He growled, his voice low and gravelly, the knife trembling slightly in his grip. He leaned closer, the heat of his body radiating against yours as he pressed the blade gently against your skin—a deliciously dangerous sensation that sent shivers down your spine.

"Deadpool way, huh?" You teased, your voice a sultry whisper. "Let's see if you can keep up."

He chuckled darkly, his free hand trailing down your body, his fingertips grazing your skin, and leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. "Oh, I can keep up," he murmured, his voice dripping with wicked promise. "But the question is, can you handle it?"

You bit your lip, the anticipation making your heart race. "Why don't you find out?" you challenged, your eyes sparkling with a mix of defiance and desire.

He growled, a primal sound that sent shivers down your spine. He pushed you back onto the bed; the knife roamed over your body, claiming you with an urgency that made your heart race. The mask added an element of anonymity, a thrill that neither of you could deny.

"Answer me, not with another question." His voice was a dark promise, his right hand gripping your hips as he positioned himself between your legs.

"I can handle anything you throw at me," you challenged, your breath coming in short, excited gasps as you felt the cold of the blade, your kin burning with desire.

His eyes behind the mask bore into yours, filled with an intensity that made you shiver. "Then let’s see if my bratty slut is saying the truth."

Without another word, he thrust into you a raw, powerful movement that made you cry out. He moved with a rhythm that was both punishing and exhilarating, pushing you to the edge and then pulling you back, over and over again. 

"Look at you," he panted, his voice a mixture of amusement and desire. "My pretty slut, taking it so well."

You could barely respond, your mind a haze of pleasure and sensation. All you could do was hold on and ride the wave of ecstasy that he was creating.

Heeseung's grip on the knife tightened momentarily, his lips ghosting over your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.

"What happened? Is it too much?" He was teasing you; you were 100% sure that he was smiling behind the mask while seeing you as such a mess below him. Your eyes are teary, your pretty lips are parted, and your eyes are rolling at the back of your head due to his movements.

That's like an ego boost for him.

In one swift motion, you pinned him beneath you, his hands roaming possessively over your body in surprise. His touch was rough and demanding, yet laced with a gentleness that made your head spin. The mask he wore only added to the intoxicating allure, his eyes piercing through the fabric with an intensity that made your breath hitch.

"I'm taking this." He growled when the knife wasn't on his hand anymore but on yours, moving to his jawline and pecs as you put his dick inside you once again. Heeseung lost his mind because, no matter how much he fucked the living shit out of you, you'll always be tight.

You started in his favorite position, cowgirl.

The room was filled with the sounds of your shared passion, the rhythm of your movements matching the beat of your racing hearts. Heeseung's hands found your hips, guiding you with a mixture of dominance and encouragement.

"You like this, don't you?" He taunted, his voice rough with desire. "My pretty slut is riding me so well."

You couldn't help but moan in response, the sensation of him filling you completely overwhelming your senses. Each thrust brought you closer to the edge, your body trembling with the intensity of your pleasure.

Heeseung's eyes never left yours. You could feel his gaze burning into you, fueling the fire that raged between you.

With a sudden, powerful thrust, he took control once more, flipping you onto your back with a predatory growl. His movements were relentless, his hands pinning you down as he drove into you with a force that left you breathless.

"You're mine," he whispered harshly, his breath hot against your ear. "Don't forget that."

"I fucking won't. I swear." You were a moaning disaster, your body arching beneath him as he pushed you to the brink. The world around you blurred; the only thing that mattered was the intense connection you shared with him in that moment.

Heeseung's pace quickened, his grip on you tightening as he brought you both closer to the peak, his hand slapping to your tits and thights. The pleasure built to an almost unbearable crescendo, your cries of ecstasy mingling with his low, primal groans.

"Fuck! Don't stop."

"I wasn't even thinking about it- Fuck. You're such a slut for me."

"Fuck! Yes, I am. I'm your cum-slut." Now you were sure the bed was about to break anytime soon. The speed was inhumane.

Finally, with a shuddering thrust, he sent you both over the edge, the wave of pleasure crashing over you in a blinding, all-consuming surge. You clung to each other, riding out the intense high together, your bodies trembling with the aftershocks.

As the world slowly came back into focus, Heeseung took off his mask, his appearance being hotter than it was before as he kept on shooting all his sperm over your legs, his cum being unstoppable. You saw the knife on your hand, and you kneeled in front of him, some of his cum attacking your face. 

You passed the blade of the knife over his dick, collecting his cum, and the knife was coated in white in no time. He moaned at the look of you taking all the blade in your mouth and licking it like it was his dick in a gentle manner.

"Stop. I don't want to appear in those "He died because his girl just made his sexual fantasy a reality." ,stop making me horny." He took off the knife from your hand after that sinful sight and laid you down in bed again, your legs opening as he took a look at your lovely cunt.

He now passed the blade with care all over your cum mixed with his; he copied your action a little too eager, cutting himself in the tongue and his face crunched due to the pain.

"Fuck, that hurt."

"No shit, Sherlock." You sat on the bed with him as you told him off and looked at his tongue. Blood was starting to spread, but it was a small cut, but not too small to say it was superficial.

"Who cares? I got used to the taste of blood in my mouth." You put your index finger in his wound, making him hiss. Curiosity struck again, and you insert your finger to your mouth, licking his blood. "Fuck you, actually."

"I was curious."

"It tastes better with my lips on yours; let me give you a taste." His hand went to the back of your neck, welcoming you in a hot kiss once again, his lips urgent against yours as he pulled you closer. The taste of blood mingled with the remnants of your shared pleasure, creating a heady mix that left you both breathless. Heeseung's tongue danced with yours, the slight sting adding an edge to the already electric connection between you.

His hands roamed your body, exploring every curve and dipping with renewed fervor again. Each touch sent shivers down your spine, the intensity of his desire igniting your own. You could feel his heartbeat pounding against your chest, the rhythm matching the wild thrum of your own pulse.

Breaking the kiss, Heeseung's eyes locked onto yours, dark and filled with a primal hunger. "You're perfect," he murmured, his voice rough with emotion. "Every inch of you."

His words sent a flush of heat through you, and you arched into his touch, craving more, wanting another orgasm. Heeseung responded instantly, his fingers trailing down your body to explore the slick heat between your thighs. The sensation was overwhelming, and you moaned, your body trembling with anticipation.

"I want you to feel everything," he whispered, his breath hot against your skin. "Every touch, every kiss, every thrust. I want you to remember this moment forever."

With that, he began to move again, his touch gentle but insistent. The pleasure built slowly this time—a steady, relentless climb that left you gasping for breath. Heeseung's eyes never left yours, the connection between you deepening with every shared gasp and moan.

As the intensity mounted, you felt yourself slipping over the edge once more, your body surrendering completely to the waves of ecstasy that crashed over you. Heeseung followed you into the abyss, his release mingling with yours in a final, shattering moment of bliss.

When the world finally settled around you, you lay in each other's arms, the afterglow wrapping you both in a warm, comforting embrace. Heeseung's fingers traced lazy patterns on your skin; his touch was a gentle reminder of the connection you shared.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly, his eyes filled with concern.

You smiled, your heart swelling with love for him. "More than okay," you whispered. "I'm perfect."

Heeseung's smile mirrored yours as he pulled you closer, his arms wrapping around you protectively. "Good," he said, his voice filled with contentment. "Because I don't plan on letting you go anytime soon."

"Me neither." You both stay that way, wrapped up in each other's warmth. As you both basked in the afterglow, Heeseung suddenly chuckled, breaking the comfortable silence.

"What?" you asked, a curious smile playing on your lips.

He grinned mischievously. "I was just thinking, if this was a movie, this would be the part where the credits roll and the audience gets all teary-eyed."

"You really think they will get teary-eyed after the porn movie we just created?"

Heeseung laughed; the sound was warm and infectious. "Hey, even the steamiest movies need a good love story. And ours is the best kind."

You rolled your eyes playfully, but you couldn't help the smile that spread across your face. "I guess you're right. We should get awards for our performance."

Heeseung's eyes twinkled with amusement. "Absolutely. Best Actor and Best Actress, no doubt."

You laughed, feeling a lightness in your chest that was all thanks to him. "Then let's give them a show worth remembering."

Heeseung leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. "Always," he murmured against your skin. "But first, I want three bowls of ramen."

"Heeseung. Fuck off, for real."

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↷ 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚢'𝚜 note: And we start! Also, this is also a VERY belate birthday gift for my wife @dollyyun ilysm pookie, happy birtday 💞. And shout out to Kayla for the tips for the knife play scene 🦋