#i know it's not march 3 yet i dont care i just finished it and i like it

[mar64ds]

happy birthday, sam!

[hhoneycloves]

you should infod- ahem EXPOSIT about your writing.

OH DONT GET ME STARTED

So basically I had an AU idea towards the beginning of this delicious month of March. As a precursor, I personally subscribe to the idea that Soul's reactions to stress are "mental breakdown" and "kill them all and let god [harmonia] sort out the rest"

in this particular AU that im writing, [and i havent quite decided if the events take place Before or After RoE but I'm kinda leaning towards After with a subtle rewrite of events,] Soul picks the Mysterious Third Option of Disappear And Never Return.

Not without leaving behind a bunch of silly clues [on accident] and being scary and seeding doubt between the other two though :3

I will not spoil any of Soul's motives or methods or thoughts or Anything, but basically he leaves behind nothing [surface level or obvious] except for a note from his personal diary with a Strange Truth that the others have to figure out the meaning behind.

Oh and they also have to Not Kill Each Other.

They definitely still fight. They TOTALLY still fight. But now they both have the added factors of "I think I care about Soul more than the other one does" and "I can say basically wtv about Soul because he's not here to hear me use him as leverage in an argument" and it gets Very Tense between them for a while.

I honestly have not finished drafting the entire plot yet. Which is something I usually never have to do. Because. I'm. Not a writer. This fic is the first thing I'm ACTUALLY WRITING in maybe 5 or 6 years. Pen to paper. [...keys to google doc.] Instead of it just being some strange amorphous timeline in my head like the rest of my stories.

Anyways I think I've said more than enough. Maybe too much. Maybe I spoiled something. Who knows. Enjoy this synopsis :3

[senversum]

Opening Character Art Commission (2-3 slot available/ 2 weeks - a Month done/ depending on the complexity

Hello Everyone… first of all nice to meet you guys. you could called me Sen, I'm known as the artist for Totem Force, Unearth Your Gays, and The Onryō of Osaka.

i've been taking hiatus on digital drawing for years, the last time i did some art was in 2021, the reason for it was something im not comfortable enough to disclose in a lot of detail (im sorry) short summary of some of them (beside the covid case) are these :

in 2019 ive been living alone, which makes me have more time to work on art

but i have to come back to my parents house at the start of 2020 to take care of them and my lil sister which taking more of my daily life time

since my parents quite old i have to fully take care of the house chores and such like taking care of my lil sister education, managing the administration file and such when she have to apply for her Junior High School

managing monthly bills like electricity, water, gas, etc (not to mention that i just become unemployed to take care of the house)

i also have to manage our daily food like doing grocery in the morning after taking my lil sister to her school, preparing food for my family (cooking for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and my lil sister packed lunch)

another house chores like cleaning the house, doing dishes and such

not to mention dealing with family drama for my mentally abusive parents (the reason why i leave the house in 2019 and living on another city away from them) which taking a lot for me to stay sane

around 2022 my mom took a turn and make a mess of our life, she ended up diagnosed with bipolar and mentally unstabled state, which cause a lot of problem with neighbours and relative. she cause harmed to herself and other which ended up making me the one to blame for "not taking good care of her"

forgot to mention i also have to deal with my parents debt on top of it (dad never pay the monthly bill for years and caught in indefility, mom taking a bunch of debt from bank and loan shark, lil sister got neglected since i left the house (and yes it was me who usually take care of her since birth she basically said im more of a parent figure for her than her own parents)

there are a lot more i couldnt mention which ended up taking me to a dark places and makes my life feels too much of a burden, i was considering to end myself in 2022 (unfortunately not my first attempt considering how tiring it was to live under my parents abusive tendency in my youth)…

it tooks me a while to get a grip on myself again, but i decide to keep on living my life in hope it get better, not to mention i hate the thought of burdening other people by taking the easy way out, i still owe a lot of people, and my lil sister still need me to keep on taking care of her, and i dont know what will happened with this house if theres no one to take care of it

im not talking to any professional yet but talking with some close friend online does help quite a lot in sorting out my thoughts.

im stable enough now to deal with my daily life in this house, and im planning to stick with it until my lil sister graduated from her high school in around 3-4 years in the future. in my vision she will be old enough to taking care of herself then so i could get my rein back to focusing on my own life

Long story short im slowly getting back on drawing digitaly since 28 march this years, and lets be honest… i couldnt fully work on my backlog without earning any income for my living cost while im at it, so hopefully by taking another comission alongside my overdue list i could get through all of it. and please dont worry and thinking i will neglect your commision, i will give my best to finish it within 2 weeks - a month (depending on the complexity of it). you could talk more detail with me if you decide to take my service offer

Im thanking all of you for even considering reading all this stuff, sorry for the long post and thank you..

TL:DR im opening character art commision for like 2-3 slots, you could find more of my samples here :

and i will post my commission sheet here :

once again sorry for the long post, and please contact me if you are interested… thank you <3

[forsakenmissives]

I know nothing about football but I'd still like to hear about the au :3

see bc i complain and then i don't even know where to start LOL

ok so ig i'll start with the title From the Sidelines and a little description i have, to pique interest heh

Arthur is Camelot FC's star striker and captain. Merlin is the kitman. Life is hardly ever fair.

anyway . i suppose that's. a little misleading. that being said i think this grew into something waaaaay larger than i originally planned @.@ like it was supposed to be a fun little addition to the surprisingly small amt of footballer arthur fics we have but now this fic has double daddy issues (balinor my beloved...), coming out, sports injuries, shitty coaches (aredick die by my sword) and never making the national team. HUH??? i just wanted merthur to fuck on the pitch... (joke) (just in time for fuck him on the field friday)

also there's side stories. like one is when the players get handcuffed tgt for 24hrs but they've got an uneven amt for it and merlin gets roped in

and then there's the valentine's day arwen special that i somehow accidentally made into a statement about arthur's attitude toward his sexuality?? and feelings for merlin??? through his anxiety about his date with gwen????

“All good?” Merlin asks. “Never better,” Arthur replies, then pivots and walks directly into his closet. He stares at his barren shoe rack before he feels hands on his shoulders, and Merlin is turning him around and guiding him back out. “Wrong way,” he hears him say. “Right.” This time, Arthur marches out his room then down the hall to the front door. “I’ll be back.��

i'm allowed to give this info bc i don't know if i'll ever actually post the extras. i dont' even know when i'm gonna finish the main story sjkdfhgjkf

oh yeah another side story takes place in 2007 (that might be the title for it idk) and it's about uther buying camelot fc for arthur's tenth birthday LOL dont question the legaltiy of arthur playing for his father's club. i dont know and i dont care. this is fiction SIMILARLY dont say shit abt arthur being a striker and captain. it's happened before. it's literally fine. dont even worry about it

there's like. ik i rly only talked about the side stories but u have to realize just how much has already gone into this fic and i wouldn't even say i'm halfway done. i don't think i've written out a single match which is also funny bc i've been keeping up with the prem and actually think i can do it now. i just keep dragging my feet abt it lol

i think the hardest part for me is when im gonna have to seriously injure arthur. i didnt want to but i think it's an important way for his and merlin's relationship to progress and also would explain merlin's attitude toward him in january. its less abt injuring him and more abt him having to sit out of games not for like. lineup stats/compatibility reasons

oh my god typing this all out made me realize we haven't met like. half of the guys on the team yet. i was sitting here like "i need to rewatch eps with all the knights bc i dont trust myself to write percy and elyan accurately" but now i just realized i dont even know if mordred is on the like. squad yet or if he's still with the u18s (after a brief check with my info page he is. i'm gonna be sick)

like i said there is a LOT of info on this . sorry this was so long i just needed to ramble a bit and it also made me realize some info i still need to include so yayyy :3 thank you nonny if u have anything u wanna know in specific like fr anything PLEASE ask. i'd love it so much if u asked. u saved my life <3

[whatagirlwants]

just saw a post as i was looking sabrinas snl up so im back here to debunk this whole idea from J stans.

lets start with the whole idea of “confirmed songs about him” i’m sure for Jstans they have a different idea but lets start with:

Skinny Dipping, when S put it out J liked multiple of her posts at once, it was Sept 2021. (i’ll actually try to SITE as much interviews as possible) but here is what she told teen vogue about skinny dipping; “I didn’t feel in that moment that I was at a place where I could literally be skinny dipping in water under the bridge,” Sabrina tells Teen Vogue. “I didn’t feel like I was healed and fully out of a place where I didn’t hold any anger or resentment.” Instead, she dreamed up a scenario where she hadworked through those feelings. meaning she wasnt there yet with him but she was “dreaming” or “imagining” a day where it doesn’t hurt and they have moved on and they’re at peace. keep in mind all the songs were done literally july /aug cuz thats when her and her collaborators went upstate to finish the album.

Decode, a month later S runs into J at a Harry concert, we obviously dont know the details, but we know it was for 3 seconds and that S went to him to say Hi. later the next day? S in the same outfit as the concert posts a video of her and a piano in NYC singing decode lyrics “you’re good at the falling not the staying there you’re good at the giving too much then getting scared you’re good at impersonating someone who cares and you had me for a minute there. now i wonder why i let your CONFUSION keep me up at night im so tired” link to the tiktok . also need to add the rollingstone interview during album drop where she says how leaving was never an option for her and the song took a long time to finish cause it was her accepting she doesnt need to ask questions and understand why or how things happened and just let it be. which brings me to “How Many Things?” where she is also asking those questions. (skip to decode section to better understand> https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/sabrina-carpenter-emails-i-cant-send-interview-1381304/)

How Many Things: now this is a lyrical sign but remember the way S described him in Decode, lets take a look at what she says in How Many Things: “i wonder how many things you think about before you get to me, i wonder how many things you wanna do you think im in-between. i feel myself falling further down your priorities and i still make excuses for you constantly” to me this is a huge sign to how much she still cared yet that person doesnt he has other things on his mind or maybe other people. lets take a look at the 2nd verse “remember when you left once that never made too much sense to me. well it hurt you so bad hurting me. you really came to me for for sympathy” this is a confused man i dont know i rest my case. this is definitely about the last time they were in the same place. cause remember BILAB “when everything went down we already broken up” is true. They were spotted last in Nashville during a tornado warning around March.

Tornado Warnings: people that were online then picked this up. but there is picture proof but i dont recall where it went of a fan with J. so J fans have buried this cause the fan said they saw the “blonde girl” with J and inserted a pic with J and said it was during a “tornado warning” cut to a year later when s revealed the tracklist she even has a song about that night. this further proves the breakup. if anyone has a screenshot send it to me or guide me where to find it. i remember a big “hsmtmts” instagram update account posted about it but the account was later turned private ill try to find the username. anyways we can all look at tornado lyrics, and it describes its about someone who goes back to an Ex which she knows is wrong & is a hige red flag, she is actively lying to her therapist abt him because she didnt want things to change she wasnt ready to cut this obvious red flag, person who is no good for her, confused about his own feelings, out of her life. i mean we dont know much but if her therapist told her to stay away and shes lying to them about it that person is obviously toxic, heres a link to sabrina saying its a true story to rollingstones and how she wasnt ready to heal https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/sabrina-carpenter-emails-i-cant-send-interview-1381304/

bilab; i didnt put this up on the list cause its obvious. but this song isnt “about” him its about the hate she received for being with him. she doesnt describe their relationship if anything the only bits we got is how he told her she’ll always be his favorite which she ROLLS HER EYES singing this live and that when it all went down meaning when DL/Skin dropped they already broken up we obviously dont have the exact details BUT we know sabrina loved him and wasnt ready to heal or leave further proof in the rollingstone interview i linked she says about decode how leaving wasnt an option for her she really thought they could fix this. ill go up and add that point to decode cause. “It’s sometimes easier to stay in a situation that might not be good for you than it is to gather the courage to leave.”

Vicious: on tour S said this was the last song written and recorded and added to emails because it wasnt finished in aug/sept 2021 like the most of the album, it was done Feb 2022. S followed Amy her collaborator during that time as well, thats why S sings “one year 10 thousand bad moments”. and to further confirm the confusion of the person she describes in previous songs, changing his mind about the 2 girls “me or her u just run to whoever is winning”. i think Vicious speaks for itself, read the lyrics.

which brings me to FWD tracks. fwd tracks came in march 2023, and the standard album were July 2022. so after months of S living with the new music she went back and wrote or collected new songs to end the chapter of emails. the concept of emails is writing songs no one were supposed to hear, her true feelings towards what she went through. there comes Lonesome “why were you somewhere else when you were next to me did you think about her face with your arms around my waist did u even give a fuck” and the lyrics that FURTHER confirms Vicious “isnt kind of strange how it all changed when i wasnt the one they wanted you to love” (DL/Skin outrage, hate, locals telling him to go back to O). but obviously she must have also gone past those feelings and felt free’er which is where Feather comes in, its Sabrina finally moving on which she did by putting the album out, touring, and moving forward with her life she put the past, the breakup, behind her. but it didnt happen easily she needed to BLOCK and finally CUT this person out the confusion he brought, she really had nothing left to decode. i wrote about things i wish u said recently i think if i didnt then ops probably forgot to post.

so this it for now. sorry its long. i just needed to open some eyes. ITS OKAY that she felt those things about him and u cant say it isnt true we’ve seen her cry during these songs on tour, the way she’s talked about the songs and the breakup she went through, its real. just cause he’s your favorite celebrity or artist who himself confirmed he was thinking of his other ex during these moments of his lives such as during bacteria infection, and more i dont really keep up with his songs lyrics but i remember a song saying he was thinking of someone else with his arms around another girl. he’s confusing man in his career, in his songs, in his life which validates her even more.

and thats it for this let me know what you think. might delete this later

it’s frustrating to me that there’s still jbass fans who say that sabrina has only written about him in a positive light. it’s okay to admit when someone has songs written about them.

she hasnt they keep misunderstanding her songs starting from skinny dipping

[worstloki]

Top Forty Thor-Being-Thor Moments from Thor 1

just absolute dumb*ssery that this 7yr old kid’s life goal is to “hunt down the monsters and slay them all”. I’ll go easy on him here and let the Thor/Loki expressions do the talking because of “...just like you did Father” but seriously can his hands even fit around a sword handle??? this kid isn’t even punching the air right??? if there was a sword in his hand he would’ve cut his head with the way he’s moving???? pure tiny-himbo energy here just look at that >:o face he’s making. contrasts very nicely with Loki’s ‘,:|. 10/10. such a baby idiot.

“the jotuns must pay for what they have done! they broke into the weapons vault! if the frost giants had stolen even one of these relics!” thor. thor please. can you even name one of these relics. thor. hey thor. thor. shut up. “well, what would you do about this?” odin asks him. “march into jotunheim! like you once did! break their spirits! so they’ll never try anything like this again!” wow okay so we’ve fast-forwarded by like a thousand years and thor is still going on about genocide. huh. that’s funny, i thought loki was the genocidal one. hmm. i also just realized that the loki exclusive clip gives loki the same hairstyle thor has here so do what you will with that information.

0/10. horrible. terrible. i dont care how angy thor is about not getting to kill some jotuns or become king today this very instant, that is a tremendous waste of food. an absolute fool. how can he just remorselessly throw the bread to the floor. if loki stabbed him when he was 7 he would deserve it for this table flip alone. what a privileged white *ssh*le.

loki came skulking around a corner and suggested not to go to jotunheim and not only did thor not suspect anything but he also then went on to decide to go to jotunheim. 10/10 himbo material. 

if tumblr didn’t have a picture limit i would put every instance of thor smiling in this list because look at that stupid smile. he’s such an idiot. 11/10. this is the thor content i’m here for.

“I have no plans to die today” thor says with the stupidest open-mouthed smirking smile ever captured on film. right after he also told heimdall not to tell anyone they’re gone. he’s literally planned to strand them on jotunheim. thor’s grand plan was to strange themselves on jotunheim and also start a fight. i repeat: thor’s plan was to successfully slay all the frost giants and not need to return until they’re all gone. what an absolute d*mb*ss. this is getting ridiculous. this was originally a top-ten-thor moments list but i’m not even twenty minutes in so i’ll have to extend the list. thor. thor are you listening? thor, you’re such an idiot.

“HOW DID YOUR PEOPLE GET INTO ASGARD?!” thor you sweet sweet summer idiot, please, i am beggin,g you,, learn to rea,d , a room,, literally everyone else who came with you is regretting it, there is complete silence and only the rumble of the opposing king is meeting your “I AM THOR, SON OF ODIN”s, please, please take some notes from Loki, or, you know, literally anyone else in the room, since everyone is asking you to get out of this realm while you still can,

thor’s stupid smile makes an appearance after he gets called a princess and decides to fight a whole realm over it. you know what? thor is a princess. he’s the prettiest princess in all the lands. what’s thor gonna do about it? is he going to fight me too? I hope he does the stupid grin first. minus 15 points for the sexism. thor is a complete and utter sadistic fool who needs to get a hobby. seriously, he’s 1500 years old and still going on and on about slaying all the frost giants. boi, i hate to break it to you, but your dad is not the best or only example of greatness out there. i don’t think your dad even qualifies as an example of that.��

“THEN. GO!” 🥰 ahh yes, just thor thingz 🥰🥰 like when one friend has had his arm burnt 🥰 and another friend has been impaled and needs medical attention, 🥰🥰 and all the rest of your friends are yelling for you, 🥰 and your brother is telling you they must go, 🥰 and you decide to buy everyone time by laughing maniacally and killing more frosties because you care for them and dont find joy in destruction like a loon 🥰🥰🥰 

THIS is the iconic Thor moment that makes my day whenever I think about it. Just Thor, an absolute bumbering 6′6′’ giant boodlusting dummy sees Odin and just decides to yell “FATHAA!! WE’LL FINISH THEM TOGETHAAA!” as if the last thing Odin told him wasn’t “no, thor, we’re not going to do anything to the frost giants, do not go after them and try to kill them all.” 11/10 d*mb*assery right here folks, I couldn’t ask for Thor to be more of a fool. This is PEAK Thor energy. Look at that face. I feel like Thor spends half this movie with his nostrils flared. I love it.

okay i gotta give thor credit for rightfully calling odin “an old man and a fool” but also there was not even 1 frame of the scene where Thor had a decent face so now all i see is >:O >:| >:o >:[ when i watch that scene. yelling at odin was great, not yelling at odin after he HUAERGHed at loki was less great, but to be fair it’s thor and he is the definition of Peak D*mb*ss. 

thor literally GROWLS and starts yelling “HAMMAA?? HAMMER??” over and over. He was hit by a van, he fainted, he woke up and started growling. I don’t know what else there is to say about this.

“you dare threaten me? puny human?”. so. uhh. basically. Thor knew she was threatening him? He KNEW she had a weapon? instead he made a face and started yelling as he tried to walk his way closer????? thor you complete and utter dum dum. you frickin hairball-for-brains. im not even surprised darcy tasered him. with that kind of face, i’d taser him too.

when you wake up in an unknown place to a person smiling at you without a stupid smile, the first step is always to attack first and ask questions later 😌😌😌 (but seriously thor you imbecile why didn’t you ask where you were instead of throwing multiple people around the room and getting your butt needled. you clueless buffoon. you’ll remain a clueless buffoon if you don’t listen to anyone.)

just a quick recap but thor was knocked unconscious by a van and these people kidnapped him aboard and the next scene we see him in he’s checking himself out in  mirror after presumably changing right there in the open?????? these are the things that make thor thor. any other character and i’d question it so much, but this is thor, and i truly believe this is in-character for him. just change in the open because why not? thor is a beefcake and that’s his only redeeming quality and he knows it. 10/10 thor moment. 

I am now convinced that Thor saw Jane and “5k van-hitter to lover slow-burn height-difference himbo-scientist trope” flashed through his mind.

“but no more smashing!” Jane says, and then Thor proceeds to check her out and smile unlike an idiot and like a douche. was this his version of flirting???? i’m not one to decide, but yes, yes it was. He threw a cup to the ground and broke it, and she’s getting mad at him and berating him about it, and he’s liking it. y’all i’m sorry to break it to you like this, but thor has a canon fetish. i am so, so sorry.

im DYING. THAT ISN’T EVEN A KISS, HIS MOUTH IS OPEN. he SMUSHES his mouth around her knuckle???? WHY. I can’t keep noticing things like this. send help. please. Jane’s response makes so much more sense now; she’s laughs for a solid 3 seconds and shakes her head and is like “uhh, thank you? ahaha,” and then she keeps looking back longingly when walking away. they are doing this in PLAIN sight of EVERYONE. Darcy and Erik are standing RIGHT THERE, and Thor is doing weird things to her with his mouth. I’m out. I am done here. goodbye. 

return of the stupid smile AND the douche smile in quick succession through the entire trip. their entire dialogue is peppered with innuendo. “I’ve never done anything like this before. have you ever done anything like this before?” “many times, but you are brave to do it.” “I have nothing else to lose.” “ah but you are clever, far more clever than anyone else on this realm.” “realm? rEaLm?” “you think me strange?” “yes” “good strange or bad strange?” “I haven’t decided yet.” I AM DYING OVER THIS. plus, we get Return Of The Himbo with Jane asking after Einstein Rosen bridges and Thor is like “uh, actually, more like a rainbow bridge 😜🤪” i feel so sorry for jane here, didn’t know how much of a d*mb*ss Thor was when signing up for this van-trip and knuckle-sucking 😭😭😭 i also no longer have questions about how the trip that SHOULD HAVE BEEN A HALF-HOUR ONE turned into one that LASTED TILL THE SUN WENT FROM THE MIDDLE OF THE SKY TO SETTING by the time they arrived. I have no questions. please. I don’t want to know what they were doing in that van. please no. don’t make me think about it.

thor’s plan had 3 steps and they were 1. give jane his jacket 2. walk in and get his hammer 3. fly out. that was literally his plan. he had the first “I have a plan. attack.” moment in the MCU. pure concentrated 0-brain-cells energy right here. how can you not stan this king of d*mb*ssery. look at him, flaunting his big boy muscles. he’s about get his hammer and fly out, like he just told jane with a trademark stupid-smile.

crop-top hair-mop thor is my favourite thor. the way the entire fight scene parallels a hamster in a maze only exemplifies the thor vibes for some inexplicable reason.

“you’re big. fought bigger.” + Thor douche-smile + subtext from earlier + rolling around passionately in the mud = not a happy me. 

I swear i’m not making up this romantic subtext but it’s barely even subtext. the entire scene leading up to Thor’s attempt at lifting the hammer is actually filmed erotically. I’m not kidding. First there’s a shot where Thor pulls aside a hamster-cage-wall blind which mirrors a shower-curtain, and THEN he walks around the hammer while smiling douche-ly at it, we get a few close-ups to his face which are shot from angles slightly lower than himself, giving him an aire of superiority, plus the music adds to this, he reaches out for the hammer’s handle with a mud-covered arm in the rain, in non-slow-motion slow-motion, and he wraps his arm around it, like, he fully twists his arm, unecessarily sexually, around it as he grabs the hammer. This is not okay. On the plus side, it makes the movie much more entertaining,, on the down side,,.

im not going to call Thor dumb for not knowing he’s not worthy. im not going to. because odin literally whispered the enchantment to mjolnir after he’d thrown thor to midgard. it is very funny watching thor grunt in frustration though. he starts yelling because he couldn’t lift the hammer and just lets himself get caught. like, dude, get a life, go buy a new weapon from the store, seriously. he mourns for the hammer on-screen longer than he does for loki. he also looks like he’s in far more pain here. he becomes catatonic and unresponsive after this, but when loki dies he’s already feasting the same afternoon. 10/10 dum dum thor material. never change thor, never change. (that’s code for please change, thor, please,)

thor trying to establish dominance wherever he goes is the funniest thing because at this point he’s being a complete asgardian *ss about it and it’s reaching points of pettiness never seen before. side note: he is possibly flirting with selvig too. maybe. i’m not saying anything happened, but Thor’s openning lines when bringing him home carried over his shoulder are “he’s fine, not injured at all,” followed with an apology to selvig, and an explanation to jane which consisted only of “we drank, we fought, he made his ancestors proud,” and then he puts the man to bed and before he falls asleep erik says “i still don’t believe you’re the g*d of th*nder, but you ought to be,” so... your choice, i guess...

thor’s got his trademark stupid smile and stupidly takes jane’s life’s work notebook and starts doodling in it about trees. the last time his father told him this story about Yggdrasil was when he was 5 and he clearly hasn’t payed attention to any lesson about anything since and it shows so so much. thank you thor. very insightful knowledge you’re passing on hear. ‘i come from a world where [science and magic] are one and the same,’ ok great, now elaborate on that please. oh, right, you can’t because you’re thor, my bad, 20/10 thor behaviour. he couldn’t even doodle nicely. all his lines are wobbly. epic art fail. i wouldn’t trust him near my sketchbook with a 2B pencil.

THIS is thor’s realization face. in case anyone was interested in what ‘dawning truth’ looked like on him. 😰😪 THIS is the face of a thinker, of a man betrayed by his own beloved brother for unprecedented reasons. look at the nuance in his expression. 😩😩😩 so many emotions, I can’t even count them all 😩💯😪

stupid smile and “do not worry my friends, i have a plan,” he says, “i’ll just try and abuse the fact that Loki’s super selfless and kind and has no self worth to my benefit as i have countless times before which is exactly what he’s rightfully angry about this time,” he doesn’t think to himself because that is NOT the smile of someone who is thinking... like, at all. +10000 points to gryffinthor. the d*mb*ssery really jumps out.

“im sorry bro for whatever i did and whatever you’re blaming me for as an excuse to do this, im sorry bro, but you’re disturbing innocents that i don’t really care about but you’re the one making a scene in front of them so why don’t you admit you won’t kill me and are just having a temper tantrum and we move on? hmm?” and then he proceeds to get slam dunked in the face with a metal arm like yEAAAA BOI that’s what you GET for going up against the SENTIENT LAVA-SPEWING metal-man ya absolute dunderhead clod. thunderhead clod? yeah, that. he’s just so dumb, your honour, please, you must understand, the victim pleads guilty on all charges of d*mb*ss and d*mb*ss alone.

I can NOT describe the emotions I feel knowing that Thor is suck-kissing Jane’s knuckles. Like, his mouth is literally jelly-ing it up against her hand. There is suction there and it shows when he is placing and removing his mouth. I promise that’s what is happening. I’m not any happier than you about this. I regret everything. This is why Loki should be what is focused on and not Thor; Thor’s going around trying to frick frack everything in sight even if it’s just Jane’s hand. He’s maintaining eye contact with Jane while he licks her fingers. Why did I decide to rewatch this movie. 

i’m only adding this in as a thor moment because of how desperately and badly they kiss. seriously. 2/10 kiss. im not surprised jane broke up with him. they look like two actual seals fighting over an actual grape. while i’m here i’m going to criticize every fic ever that decided thor is an experienced gentle lover. what were y’all on when watching this movie. thor can and will f*ck literally everything in sight and he won’t even do it well because he is the peakest of peak d*m d*m. look at this man. look at his face. that is the face of an absolute himbo idiot, and it’s the face of an absolute himbo idiot who knows it. he’s been stranded on earth for 2 days, max, and his flirt-count is at 69 people because his name is one letter away from thot. i bet his terrible use of a pen from early means he writes his ‘r’s like ‘t’s and he doesn’t even care. 1000/10 thor moment. doesn’t get much more romance-thor than two individuals smooshing their faces together after some finger sucking. that finger sucking is gonna leave jane simping for years. and that’s true love babey. <3

“I’ll handle my Brother!” Thor says, as if Loki didn’t send a metal-murder-bot that quite virtually killed him less than ten minutes ago asdfhkhsdgsdjf Thor, you horrific himbo you, Loki’s weapon of choice is literally throwing knives he will literally kill you before you enter the room if he’s on his game and wants you dead which he just proved he would do and you’re just gonna???????????? jog on over to him????? Thor??????????? bruH???????????? buddy??????? pal???????? you really wanna go 1v1 the brother you very clearly underestimate and know nothing about????????????????? im loving the confidence, but, no.

Loki: “you literally can’t stop this from here.” Thor, immediately: “i’m going to hit it with the hammer and see if that works” and then it does in fact work later... technically speaking, even if it ends up causing chaos destruction and death and loki falling off the bifrost 😔😔😔 but Big Brain Thor is the Biggest Brained Thor!!! The plan worked!! in a messy-Thor-ish way, but it did!!!

“you can’t kill an entire race!!!!” Thor yells, teeth gritted, as he faces his brother, his coward pacifist brother, who has suddenly decided he wants to join the age-old family tradition of realm-destroying, when this is supposed to be Thor’s dream, Thor’s, not Loki’s. How dare he, Thor thinks to himself, fist clenched around Mjolnir in anger, the pain of the handle pressing against his palm perhaps the only thing preventing him from lashing out at this thought, that’s my planet of monsters to slay, he should go get his own! Loki hits Thor across the face with the back-end of his spear. “Now fight me,” Loki says, but Thor, well, Thor cannot fight, as he remains stunned that of all things Loki would dare steal his life’s ambition, and he is sent sprawling backwards across the observatory, slowly but surely sliding to a stop despite his catatonic, very symbolic silence.

the elegance, the poise, i see your time on earth has made you no less graceful, Thor. the simple magnitude of this sprawl. the spread of the arms. the turn of the feet. this is not a dude, this is a man.

sometimes your brother starts vehemently talking about he’s gonna kill the race of monsters and about how he’s only ever wanted to be your equal and about how he’s not your brother and never was and sometimes you just have to say “this is madness” instead of addressing the issues or asking for any of the  deets 🔥 👊💯😩

Loki is whipping Thor’s butt. Both literally, and metaphorically, Loki is whooping Thor’s d*mb*ss. Earlier he knicked Thor’s face, now he’s just pushing Thor around, he uses the spear as a pole and later kicks Thor’s face by kicking vertically up, and Thor, bless him in all his blond golden muscled glory, doesn’t think anything is up with this, gosh he’s such an absolute utter idiot

sometimes your brother laughs way too much and also cries too much in a fight and there are also too many of him so you just need to blast lightning so you get a shot at all of them 😌😌😌 and then put your magical infinitely-heavy hammer on his chest 😌😌😌 but it’s okay because Thor left holes in Loki’s container 😌😌😌

now THIS is the meat to Thor’s funny bone, just the pure unadulterated humour that is Thor saying that there will never be a “wiser king” or a “better father” than Odin, it cracks me up every single time without fail, just the way he says it with a straight face and— what do you mean he wasn’t joking

look at Thor’s stupid smile as he asks Heimdall to spy on jane every single day while conveniently never asking after Loki ever. This is Thor’s face in mourning after he attended a feast after everyone was celebrating after Loki’s death. Look at his stupid smile. I love him your honour. He’s just,, he’s just so frickin stewpeed, just Thor being Thor, just the purest of d*mbest of *sses. 

[loousir]

Soulmates {Oikawa Tooru}

Oikawa Tooru x Male Reader Part Two

Anime: Haikyuu!!

Warnings: Kawa being a RAT, stereotypical 'oo go out with me oikawa' girl

Masterlist | Part One

AU: Soulmates can have a different way of finding their partner. Yours is after both partners are at least 18, on the youngers birthday, they will swap bodies. They have to share their first of something together in order to return to their respective body. (Ex. Sharing their first kiss, first drink etc.)(If one has already kissed or shared a drink, for example, it wont count as sharing a first) Oikawa’s is knowing what their first words to you are.

Originally Posted on February 3, 2021

-------------------------------------------------------------------

You were way to nervous to sleep. Oikawa had managed to slip into a nice, peaceful sleep but you just couldnt. You glanced over to the clock to see it was only 10pm.

"Tooru..?"

You called for him gently but he didnt stir. You shifted away from him and sat on the edge of the bed, looking back at him before looking away again. A few moments had passed when you felt a lanky yet muscular pair of arms wrap around your waist. "Tooru?"

He was looking at you with a tired yet concerned expression. "What's wrong?" His question was soft as he gently pulled you to lay back down with him. "I just cant sleep... I'm really nervous about it I guess." Oikawa pulled you into a tight hug, resting a hand on the back of your head and efficiently smashing your face into his, still, bare chest. You blushed as he wrapped a leg around your legs.

"Remember? Even if it isn't you, I'll find you ok?" He pulled his hand away to let you look up to him. He had a pretty convincing smile on his face which made you smile too. You rested your head on his chest and kept smiling, closing your eyes.

"Thank you..."

Oikawa just smiled and gently brushed your hair with his fingers, slowly but surely luling you to sleep.

---

You woke up to the sound of your alarm going off saying it was 8am. You reached over to your phone and turned it off. It was just you in the bed but you were still in your room. You were confused.

Did I even switch with someone? And wheres Oikawa at?

You stood up and shivered at the cold air against your chest. No shirt? You looked down and realized.

Quickly you ran into the bathroom and looked into the mirror, feeling 'your' face as you tried to process what was happening. You went down stairs to smell food being made. You saw your mom and 'you' making breakfast. Both of them turned around to see 'Oikawa' shirtless and shocked.

"You. Little. RAT." You marched over and grabbed 'Oikawa' by the collar of his shirt and dragged him up stairs. "Tooru! I was cooking with my mom! Let go!" You pushed him into your room and locked the door. 'He' smiled up to 'you' and pulled the two of you into a hug.

"(Y/n), Oikawa? Are you two ok?" Your mom asked, knocking on your door gently. "Yeah, were fine. I'll explain in a minute." You said, forgetting you were still in Oikawas body. He had pulled away to grab a shirt from his bag to give you to wear. While you slipped on a shirt, you hadn't noticed that he had taken off the pj shirt that you were wearing and slipped on one of his own.

You looked over to him and looked annoyed. He was looking at 'himself' in the mirror on your closet. "You look so cute in my shirt." You blushed and grabbed his hand. "Can we please go explain to my mom and then figure out a way to switch back?" He smiled sweetly up to you and nodded.

"Stop making that face! You're making me look ugly!" He said as you just turned around, unlocked the door and dragged him back downstairs.

Your mom looked at the two of you with confusion and worry. "So... Remember how soulmates are a whole thing." You said rubbing the back of 'your' neck. She nods before thinking for a moment. "Oh! Oh..." She laughs and looks between the two of you. "That makes a lot of sense now! I was wondering what made my soon want to help me with breakfast this morning."

You glared over to 'Oikawa' and 'he' just smiled up to you with a soft blush on 'his' face. "Well, I'll be heading off to work soon so the two of you will be alone till tonight." You nodded and gave your mom a hug, 'Oikawa' doing the same.

Oikawa smiled and sat down at the table with you to eat the breakfast your mom had made. "So, how do you think we should go about swapping bodies back?" You shrugged as you kept eating, glancing to 'Oikawa' every so often. "I looked into some other people's experiences with the kind I have and they're almost all different." You said, finishing off your plate. Oikawa did the same and took both plates to the sink.

"What was the first one you read?" He asked, walking back over to you. "There was one about when you share a first of something. But like it has to be that both of you have never done that thing with someone if that makes sense."

He nods and pulls you up from the dining chair, nearly toppling the both of you in the process. "Dont forget you're in my body Tooru." He giggles and leads you upstairs. "Let's change so we can go on a date!" You blushed at him with wide eyes. "W-what? Why? We can just figure it out here!" Oikawa pulls off his shirt and slowly pulls down 'his' pants making you blush and grab his wrists.

"Wait, wait wait wait. H-how are we gonna do this?" Oikawa looked to you and tilted his head. "Well, were gonna see eachother naked at some point." He said, quickly pushing down 'his' pants. "Oikawa!" He looked back to you with an innocent smile. "Whaat?"

"Dont go any further." You warmed him firmly, holding 'his' wrists away from 'his' waist. He smirked and tried to pull away to do so but realized he couldnt. It was your turn to smirk and he looked up to you. "I like that I can do this now." He blushed and looked away making you roll your eyes.

"(Y/n)... You'll have to change too." "I dont trust you if I let you go." "I promise I wont!" "If you do I'll kill you Oikawa!"

---

After a very eventful changing session, the two of you were ready for a "date". "Ne, (Y/n), let's go already!" Oikawa whined out, pulling on your hand. "Hold on, lemme just..." You were messing with 'your' hair. "Jus stahp already- I think it's cute so leave it alone." You stopped and looked to his eyes with a blush. "You have it like, everyday at school so I didnt think it was such a big deal."

"And you never told me!?" Oikawa cackled and pulled you down stairs to put your shoes on. You both already had phones and wallets so all that was left was shoes. "Let's go to the Cafe first! Iwaizumi wants to meet us there and talk for a bit." Oikawa said standing up. You stood up as well and held 'his' hand. "Let's go get this over with."

---

The walk to the Cafe was short and sweet. You could see Iwaizumi sitting at a window booth. He spotted the two of you and waved. 'Oikawa' waved back and you did hesitantly, making the other visibly furrow his brows. The two of you walked in and made it over to his booth. "Good morning you two... Something happen?"

Oikawa responded, but not as himself. "Yeah, turns out Oikawa was my soulmate after all. We swapped back already. It was easy to figure out." Iwaizumi looked over to 'Oikawa' to see a very annoyed/aggravated stare looking back at him. 'You' shook 'your' head as Iwaizumi laughed. "What? We did." You growled slightly and smacked the back of his head.

"Stop trying to convince people your me shittykawa." "Mmh... (Y/n)~ That was mean~" Iwaizumi kept laughing before smiling at the two of you and making conversation.

The three of you talked about what happened and some upcoming assignments when Iwaizumi said he had to leave. "Well, you two have fun trying to find a way to swap back." He said gently patting your shoulder. "Please dont kill him, we need him for nationals. Good luck." Iwaizumi whispered to you before heading out.

The two of you kept on with your date, trying different things to see what could turn you back. Currently, you were in a park, laying on the grass, groaning while Oikawa went and bought some ice cream. You had closed your eyes when suddenly a shadow loomed over you. You opened your eyes to see Oikawas fangirls gawking at you.

"The hell do you want?" You asked, glaring up to them. "You're so funny Oikawa! Remember, we set up a date for today!" You furrowed your brows. "Uh, no?" She just smiled and tilted her head as you stood up to look at her properly. "Yeah we did silly, did you forget?" You looked around for 'Oikawa' but didnt see him at the ice cream stand anymore. "Yeah, no, we didnt do that. I wouldn't forget something as important as a date."

You tried to walk away to find your soulmate but were stopped when she grabbed your wrist. "Silly Oikawa! Let's go on our date now!" You pulled your wrist away and walked up to 'Oikawa' when he came back over. "What were your first words to me?" You asked, gently wrapping an arm around 'Oikawa'.

"You're in the way, stupid trashcan." 'Oikawa' responded without thinking, a smile on his face. "That question was for your little fangirl over there Tooru." He looked over to see a pretty pissed girl, glaring at 'him'. "Oh, but she wouldn't know that." "Yeah I know that, what shes not processing is that were soulmates and is trying to take 'you' who is me on a date." You said pointing to Oikawas body then your own.

"Who cares if you two are soulmates, just go out with me Oikawa." You roll your eyes and sigh. "Dont you get it?" You suddenly pulled him into a kiss, shocking him but he closed his eyes and kissed back none the less. You opened your eyes to see you were still in Oikawas body and he was still in yours. "I love him and that's not changing."

'Oikawa' quipped to her, "Plus, I'm in his body and hes in mine! You'd be going on a date with (Y/n) and not me!" Oikawa said with his 'signature' spunk. She looked like she was malfunctioning before storming off. "I think it finally clicked." You said licking the slightly melting ice cream in 'Oikawa's hand. He licked it as well and smiled.

"That was a really good kiss..."

---

The two of you had a pretty normal yet enjoyable date other than the part at the park. "I cant believe we tried so much but we havent switched back yet..." You said, laying down on your bed. 'Oikawa' straddled your hips and leaned over you a bit. "Well, there is one thing we havent tried." You blushed and looked to 'his' eyes.

"We are so not- mph." Oikawa leaned in and kissed you, resting a hand on 'your' peck for support. He slipped his tongue into your mouth and the kiss got a bit heated till you pulled away. You blinked a few times before realizing.

"Well would you look at that." He said as you smiled and leaned down to kiss him again, he reciprocated instantly and tangled a hand in the back of your hair. You pulled away again and looked to his eyes.

"I love you Tooru."

You rest your head on his chest and closed your eyes as he rubbed your back gently.

"I love you too (Y/n). I'm glad I'm your soulmate."

--- 1948 Not very proof read

[ships4you]

flames & deception {zuko}

Request: Heyoo!! Can I request a zuko x reader where Zuko and y/n get into a fight, and Zuko accidentally burns y/n? But instead of y/n getting mad at Zuko, y/n forgives him, kinda like the scene where Zuko and Iroh reunite? Ty!! ❤️❤️❤️(It can be either headcanon, imagine, whatever you’re the most comfortable with!) (*´ω｀*)

Pairing: Zuko x Earth Kingdom!Reader

Prompt: After setting Appa free Zuko has a nasty fever that leaves him sick in bed for days on end. While the reader is watching over a sleeping Zuko he has a nightmare, causing him to accidentally hurt the reader.

I’m such a sucker for againsty Zuko😻

“You know I saw a wanted poster for the blue spirit the other day.”

Lee ignored your comment, continuing to pace around his apartment above Mushi’s tea shop.

“You do know what that means, right? If someone spots you they’ll send guards after you. Or even worse; the Dai Li.”

You’ve been dating Lee for about two months now. Even though you didn’t know much about his past, he seemed to be very open and comfortable with you. A couple weeks into the relationship he told you about his evening excursions as the ‘Blue Spirit’. It never bothered you, but after climbing through your window one night all bloody and cut up from a fight, you couldn’t help but worry about your boyfriend.

“Do you hear what I’m saying?!” you raised your voice, annoyed at his I-could-care-less attitude. “Yes.” he responded dryly, slipping his swords into its sheath. You sighed and marched up to him, placing your hands on his chest. “Lee…” you said rubbing your thumbs in circles against his black skin-tight suit, “I just want you to be safe… Please, isn’t there another way?” you reached up to brush his hair out of his face. Before you could reach the black locks he grabbed your wrist tightly.

“You wouldn’t understand.” He lowered your wrist back down to your side, “I have to do this.”

This made you furious. “Oh of course!” you seethed through your teeth, “Of course I wouldn’t understand! You know not everything can be fixed with this little ‘hero’ act you have going on. Am I just not supposed to worry about you anymore?!” you yelled at him.

“Yes (y/n)! You don’t know me! You don’t know the things I’ve been through, the shitty things I have done. Hell, the shitty things I am going to do! You only care because you think I am this wounded, helpless creature, but guess what? I’m. Not. I’ve been on my own for years now and I don’t need you telling what I can and can’t do. When will you get it. I. Don’t. Need. You.”

He was now merely inches away from your face, eyes filled with fire. You weren’t sure when exactly the lump in your throat appeared, but you could feel soft, subtle tears sting against your cheeks. “Well. The next time you’re covered in cuts and bleeding out, don’t come to me.” you said before walking out, slamming the door behind you.

***

Three days after your big fight you received a letter in the mail.

Dearest (y/n),

I am afraid Lee has fallen extremely ill. He has been under my constant care for days, yet cannot seem to break his fever. I know my nephew hurt you, he often speaks out of fear— lashing out at those closest to him. I sincerely apologize on his behalf.

I need to go across town to fetch medicine to hopefully help his temperature go down. Would you be willing to come and sit with him for an hour or two? You are more than welcome to decline. Either way please come by the shop for a cup of tea soon. Seeing your beautiful smile warms my heart.

With all my love,

Mushi

As angry as you were, you knew how much he loved his nephew. You could not stand to break his heart. So, the next day you swallowed your pride and walked into the tea shop with your head held high.

He greeted you with open arms, as if nothing had happened. “He has been asleep for days,” Mushi explained leading you up the stairs to the apartment. “He just needs someone near to refill his water and keep a damp cloth a top his head. He will occasionally become restless in his sleep and thrash around a bit,” he said with sad eyes, “I will be back as soon as possible. Thank you (y/n). Your act of kindness is a gift from the spirits.” Resting your palm against his arm you said, “Mushi, you know I would do anything for you.” He smiled gratefully, bowing before leaving the room.

He looked so peaceful for the first few minutes, despite the small beads of sweat you noticed dripping down his face and chest. You made sure to switch out the damp rag with a new, cool one and refilled the bucket with fresh water. As you were putting the bucket down you noticed a worried expression stretch across his face. Before you knew it he began writhing back and forth, “Lee?” you knelt down and reached out to wake him up.

Before you could reach him, he quickly sat up and hurled his arm in your direction. You quickly jumped out of the way, and that’s when you noticed it. Fire ripping past your body. Your body was far enough, but you left hand that had come up to instinctively block your face was grazed by a stray flame. You yelped and squatted down to the floor, cradling your hand.

“(y/n)?”

You opened your hand, a slash across your palm already fading into a bright red.

“(y/n)… Please tell me I didn’t do that.” His eyes began filling up with tears.

His eyes were fearful. Terrified of what he had just done. Then the pain started to hit you. Panicking you ran to the bathroom, latching the door behind you. Your mind racing as you submerged your hand underneath the cool faucet.

Lee was a firebender.

He pounded on the door, “(y/n) please let me help you”

Was he a spy?

“Shit! I’m so sorry, please don’t hate me.” his voice cracked. It was obvious to tell he was crying.

No. Not a spy. Then why was a firebender in Ba Sing Se?

“don’t-hate-me, dont-hate-me, please just- fuck! I can’t lose you. I need you.”

“Is your name even Lee?” you felt your mouth move before you could think.

You heard him exhale through the sliding door. “No.”

You turned off the faucet, waiting for his explanation. “My name isn’t Lee. My real name is Zuko… Prince Zuko. My father- he. He is the Firelord. Two years ago he he burnt my face for speaking out against him.” he paused, “I was banished from the Fire Nation after that… My Uncle, Iroh and I have been on the run since I was 14. We came to Ba Sing Se to start over.”

You slid the door open. You were terrified to ask, but your heart needed to hear his answer “Have these last two months been one big lie? Is this… Us-” He stood in front of you eyes red from crying, his hair still damp with sweat. “No.” He said sternly, “Not you. Never with you.” His chest heaved as he spoke, “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I pushed you away. I am so sorry. I don’t deserve you.” he swiped his hand down his face, “I lied to you. I was stupid to let myself forget who I am, the kind of person I am. Being around you just made me feel… Normal. I was lost and confused and I used you. You have every right to hate me.”

“Zuko.” your lips testing the sound of his name. “I could never hate you.”

He sighed heavily. He walked up to you wrapping his arms around your middle, tucking his head into your neck. You curled your arms around his shoulders, embracing his head with your hand, stroking your fingers through his hair. You could feel his breath quicken, his tears damp against your clothes, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I love you.” your body tensed, “Please don’t leave me.” his voice whispered, muffled against your skin. Sliding your hands to his neck, you lifted his head from his chin. “I’m not going anywhere.” you reassured, hands now cupping the sides of his face, brushing the tears with your thumbs. “I love you too.”

He immediately pulled you into him, latching onto your lips. His hand slid up the length of your back, pressing your chest against his. You tilted your head downwards, resting your forehead against his. As he pulled away your hands fell to his chest. “Can I just say…” you sighed. He glance at you through his lashes, tightening his grip on your hip. “Yes. Anything.”

“I like your real name so much better than Lee.” you couldn’t help but giggle. He groaned throwing his head back, “Ugh, yea. My Uncle gave it to my as a joke. I got him back by calling him Mushi though.” You both shared a quick laugh.

“Yea I have to be honest, I had to hold myself back from moaning your name all those times. Lee is such an un-sexy name.” you joked, hooking your hands behind his back. He rolled his eyes jokingly, “I just told you I am the crowned Prince of the Fire Nation and that is what you take from it?!” You smiled giddily, “Mhmm, yup.”

“You are ridiculous.” He said before kissing you lightly. “Come on, I used to burn myself while training as a kid. I know a recipe to help it heal.” he said leading you to the kitchen.

***

Let me know if you guys want a part two, maybe a prequel or just more of this Earth Kingdom!Reader plot-line to carry throughout the storyline of the show. Maybe them reuniting on the outer walls with Iroh and the white Lotus or after the war is finished. Hope you guys liked this one <3

Tag List: @myexgirlfriendisthemoon​

[emixion]

Internet Friends - Day 4 - Maribat March 2021

this one was fun to write @maribatmarch-2k21 ao3 link

Damian: Angel, I have a surprise for you.

Mari: You do?? What is it?

Damian: Well, your birthday is coming up, and…

Mari: Damian what did you do

Damian: Calm down, it’d nothing bad.

Mari: I dont trust that

Damian: You don’t trust me?

Mari: Nope

Damian: So I should just throw away this plane ticket to Paris then?

Mari: WHAT

OH MY GOD!!!!

DAMIAN!!!!!

Damian: I told you it wasn’t bad.

Mari: ARE YOU SERIOUS RN?

Damian: I’m serious.

{planeticket.jpg}

Mari: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!

YOURE REALLY GONNA BE HERE!!!

Damian: In a week, yes.

Mari: OMG I CAN’T WAIT TO SHOW YOU PARIS

We can go to the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower and Notre Dame and i can show you my school and the bakery OF COURSE and it’ll be so fun oh my GOSH

Damian: Angel, deep breaths.

Mari: STOP TEASING ME I’M EXCITED

Damian: I can see that

Mari: SHUT UP AND CALL ME

______

Mari: I can’t believe we’re gonna meet in 3 days

it feels so surreal

Damian: I know.

How long have we been friends now? Two years?

Mari: 2 years and 3 months

Damian: You keep track of the months?

Mari: Of course

Damian: That’s…

Sweet

Mari: *gasp* Damian Wayne did you just call me sweet

Damian: Don’t rub it in, Angel.

______

Mari: Tomorrow!!! I can’t believe it’s tomorrow!!!

Damian: Neither can I.

Mari: are you all packed yet?

Damian: Finishing up now.

Mari: And you’re staying for TWO WEEKS

i’m so glad it’s summer. i can’t imagine you would’ve been able to stay so long if you had school

Damian: Well, Father probably could’ve pulled some strings. I wouldn’t say never.

Mari: Lila’s totally gonna pretend she knows you.

Damian: And I will take pleasure in the look on her face when I tell her I’ve never seen her before.

Mari: Don’t be too meannn

Damian: You’re too nice for your own good, Angel.

Mari: maybe

Can you call right now?

Damian: I can. Hang on one second.

______

Damian: At the airport.

Mari: OMG!!!

When do you take off??

Damian: In about two hours.

Don’t wait up, alright? Get some sleep and I will text you when I land.

Mari: But i’m too excited to sleeeep

Damian: Try your best. I’ll be there soon.

Mari: Ok. Have a safe flight Dami <3

Damian: Thank you, Angel.

______

Damian: We’ve landed.

Mari: I’M UP I’M UP

WE’RE LEAVING FOR THE AIRPORT IN 10 MINUTES

I’M SO EXCITED

Damian: Don’t rush yourself, we still have to go through bag claim.

Mari: I DON’T CARE I’M RUSHING

Damian: What am I going to do with you?

Mari: HUG ME WHEN YOU SEE ME

Damian: I can arrange that.

______

Mari: I’M HERE

Damian: We’re in Terminal C.

Mari: I’M COMING

WAIT I THINK I SEE YOU

_______

Damian hardly has any time to process the text before a familiar voice yells his name. He looks up from his phone to see a grinning Marinette bounding towards him. He just manages to catch her as she throws herself into his arms.

“Damian!” She cries, clinging to him tightly. “Oh my god, you’re real!”

Her laugh is incredibly infectious, and Damian fails at keeping the smile off his face as he hugs her back.

“Yes, I’m real, Angel.” He says, feeling her hands squeeze at the back of his collar.

“You sound just like you do on the phone..” She muses with a giggle, pulling back to get a good look at him. “And you look the same too.”

Damian brushes her bangs out of her eyes, making her gasp softly. “You’re even more beautiful in person.“ He says softly, the tender smile on his face reserved only for her.

Marinette squeaks, thanking him breathlessly, and there’s a moment that is spent just taking each other in.

After a beat, Damian clears his throat, coming back to his senses. After all, they’re still in an airport.

“Well, um, shall we?” He asks, offering his arm. Marinette beams, taking his arm. This was going to be her best birthday yet.

“We shall.”

[letstalkaboutshtufff]

Geralt x Injured reader part 1

Part 2

Pairing: Geralt x reader (self insert)

Warnings: swearing, injury, blood, I think that's all?

Summary: Reader is feeling jealous and wanders too far from camp.

*********************

Hey guys! This is like my first fanfiction ever. And I wrote it at like 3am when I couldn't sleep. It's probably trash but if you like it I do have ideas for more! Xoxo enjoy****

Geralt x injured reader part 1

Jealousy was not a pretty color on you. And you swore riot yourself it was no such thing. After all Geralt of Rivia was just a teacher/friend you were travelling with. You had some skill with a sword, he found you trying to take down a kikkemora all by yourself, and failing miserably. After you saw how skilled he was you begged him to take you with him, to train you. He said no of course, so you just kept tagging along without his consent. At some point though he finally decided that if you were gonna come along you might as well be of some use so you made a deal.

Over the months you grew stronger but still had much to learn. After all it takes years for anyone to become a great fighter. And luckily for you, Geralt had many many many years of experience to offer you.

You enjoyed the time you spent togther, the conversation, (although you did most of the talking..) and the training, he was one of the few people in your life you felt comfortable with. Someone you could always count on. And somewhere along your travels the line between student and teacher blurred for you into something else, although you did your best to deny it at first.

You had gone off and caught feelings for the man who had no interest in real committed relationships. You knew you had it bad when you found yourself overflowing with irritation when he spent his nights in the arms of some whore at a dirty brothel.

On those nights you drank until you passed out on roach. Pretty fucking pathetic y/n.

Then came along the witch, Yennefer..

You saw how they looked at eachother, a look you'd wish Geralt would give you even for a fleeting moment.

There were creatures that had been attacking the villagers at night, so the three of you, well four since Jaskier decided to tag along when he spotted us, were tracking these monsters into the forest. You didnt mind Jaskier at all, his songs a welcome distraction from the obvious growing bond between Geralt and Yennefer.

You felt horrible for the animosity you felt towards her. She did nothing wrong and you hated that if not for your jealousy, you probably would have been close friends.

If you were a better women you could get over your silly crush and focus on your training but...

Yeah you had some growing to do. After searching the forest for a few hours, and finding nothing, everyone was tired and decided to set up camp.

Once Geralt tied down roach, he turned to address the group, "Everyone is to stay in camp, these monsters are dangerous, so if you need to take a piss, I suggest you do it behind a tent, unless you wanna risk getting your head shot off" he said rather gruffly.

Jaskier made a sound of discomfort and scooted closer to the fire.

"Dont worry jaskier, I'll protect you" you giggled.

He turned to you in amusement, "Ah yes how does go the training y/n, last I saw you, you could barely lift your sword" he teased.

"I've gotten rather good, mind if I practice on you?" You teased.

"Thanks but I think I better go and get my beauty sleep, good night" he smiled and retreated into his tent.

You went to feed roach some apples when you noticed that Geralt and Yennefer had dissapeared.

Huh? Where did they go? At first you thought they were in trouble since you didnt hear either of them say goodnight but as you got closer to the middle of camp you heard voices coming from Yennefers tent.

You told yourself not to look but you couldn't help it. And the instant you did you felt your heart break. It was one thing to see him in the arms of a whore. You knew they meant nothing to him, but in the arms of someone he cares for? That hurt...

Roughly you turned away from the kissing couple and marched away. Away from camp, away from stupid feelings and dumb petty jealousy.

It was not yennefers fault she was beautiful and powerful and brilliant. And if you were jealous then you should become just as amazing as she is. Maybe then he would notice you...

You were snapped out of your reverie when a rustle in the bushes caught your attention.

Fuck I was not supposed to leave camp...

Thinking quickly, you unsheathed your sword and held it at the ready. Its sharp edge gleaming in the moonlight.

Eyes narrowing at the bush. A moment later you were relived when a rabbit hopped out.

Phew I thought It was--

*SCRAWWWWWWWWCH*

Fuck

You barely missed the creatures slimy claws as it swiped for your head. Jumping to the side you managed to get a good look at the beast. It was rather large and spider looking, with several disgusting sets of beady eyes and a long slithering tough that dripped of something purple. So geralt was right, the creature lurking here was a visser. (Completely made it up on the spot) They're claws are sharp and quick but it's the tongue you have to watch our for. One jab, although not fatal can leave a man in bed for days from pain. 2 jabs in the same place? then your a goner. And the visser is known to be smarter, he distracts with claws and jabs quickly before you can even blink.

You knew you should probably yell for your companions. There was a chance they could hear you. But that very second you thought of yennefer and how she would be able to take on a monster like this.

That made up your mind...this monster was going to be your kill... youd finish this off and prove that you had gotten stronger if it's the last thing you do.

Although that would kind of defeat the purpose...

"Urgh" you landed roughly on the ground, one of its claws managed to swipe at you.

"Ok no more misses nice gal" regainging your stance, the glint of the moon shone on your opponent. With a visser you had a few options. Option 1, go for the head which kills instantly but the risk of a jab is highest.

Option 2 is cut off all the legs quickly then send your sword through the head. But if it dodges... you're dead meat.

Option 3, try to get under the beast where its tongue cant reach you and strike upwards. With your small stature option 3 sounded the smartest. You just had to move fast enough where it wouldnt be able to see you for a split second.

Alright y/n dont let your training go to waste! This is your chance to prove yourself.

Running faster than you've ever ran before, you circled around the visser waiting for when the creature was even a second slow and could not see you. The right moment was.....

Now! You sprinted forward and slid under its legs.

"Scrawaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaachh" the monster howled in pain as you slammed your sword directly up getting covered in visser guts in the process.

"Blegh how disgusting.." you swiped the guts off your face and stood in front of the slain beast.

For once in a long time you felt proud of yourself. You slayed a monster all by yourself, even Geralt said you hadn't been ready yet and often told you to stay back during fights. But he would have to eat up his words now hehe. You could just imagine everyone's faces when you would tell them.

You were too wrapped up in your glory to notice a second visser sneaking up behind you.

By the time you heard its screech, it was too late. Its slimy black tongue had struck your stomach leaving a sizzling pain behind it.

"FUCK" unsheathing your sword again, you tried to maneuver far enough out of its reach to thing of a plan. There was no way you could pull on option 3 again with the way your core burned. One more jab and it would be over. Damn it! why couldn't you just have your victory and be done with it!

One hand clutched at your injury while the other was positioned weakly in front of you. Your eyes blurred slights but you refused to let this shit swamp be your final resting place.

The burning subsided to an ache and you used that opportunity to make a mad dash into the thicket. You needed to think of a plan and quick, it would not take long for the visser to catch up with you, especially now that you had that stupid injury.

"Srawwwwwwwwwch" it sounded like it was right behind you. Fuck fuck fuck.

And then because mother nature decided to be a BITCH, you tripped on a large tree root and tumbled forward.

"Scraeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech" you flipped over quickly and shut your eyes as the visser was basically on top of you. 3 more seconds and you would be dead.

3, how pathetic y/n, after all these promises you made to yourself about becoming someone worth being proud of you fuck up the one chance you had.

2, maybe it's better this way, would anyone even miss you? Jaskier would, maybe he would even write a song about you..

1, I'm sorry I was an idiot...Geralt I'll watch over you...

"SWOOOOOOOOSH" the unmistakable sweet sound of metal slicing through flesh made your eyes shoot wide open.

"Geralt!" He stood out of breath hovering over the now beheaded visser. His sharp golden eyes moved from the beast, to you.

Without a word he reached over and pulled you up without a hint of gentleness. You hid your wince at the sudden movement. Not wanting to let anyone know that the visser had gotten the better of you.

"What happened" he bit out slowly. Fuck he was angry. "Why did you leave camp y/n when I explicitly told you not to" his feline eyes bore into yours and suddenly you felt too intimated and looked away.

Ah yes what excuse will I come up with now. Sorry Geralt I had to leave because I felt immense pressure and heartache seeing you and Yennefer over there locking lips and most passionately I might add.

When he noticed my hesitation he let out a growl, "Hmm, don't lie to me"

Fuuuuuuuuuck...

"I-I didnt mean to, really... I couldn't sleep so I was walking close to camp and I didnt even realize I had wandered so far until the other visser attacked." You looked him in the eyes knowing it would better your chances of him believing it.

He stared at you a few more seconds before letting out a sigh.

" You killed it" he said bluntly, and softer than before.

"I did.." you couldn't help the small smile that formed on your face. He sighed again, this time he had a small smirk on his face, "Well I guess you have learnt some things after all" he patted your shoulder but pulled away when Yennefer and Jaskier appeared.

"Y/n thank god your alive, are you alright?!" Jaskier grabbed your shoulders and scanned you for injuries. Luckily your stomach was covered by your armor, visser Jabs were known for hurting like hell at first, seeming to get better shortly after, then coming back tenfold. Right now you were at stage two, the calm before the storm..

Yennefer made a comment about how impressive you were to slay the visser and you hated yourself for still feeling ill towards her. She was a great person and you could not blame Geralt for liking her. It was just an unfortunate situation.

The walk back was quiet and the second you were in your tent again you dared to take a look at the wound. Gingerly you unbuckled your armor and lifted up your shirt.

You let out a small sigh of relief. It just looked like a large bruise. Nothing you couldn't pass off as a "I fell off roach" kinda injury.

As positive as you tried to be, you knew the worst was yet to come. But by god you were not about to let your victory be ruined by your companions knowing of this. Especially since Yennefer and Geralt could've slain the beast without a scratch.

Somehow you were lucky and slept the rest of the night in peace. It was early when jaskier came to wake you. Although you slept plenty, you felt just as exausted as you did after your late night encounter.

Before putting on your armor, you dared to look at the wound again. You regretted it the moment you did.

Fuck me... the bruise was much darker than before and covered a larger area. As for the pain, it felt only slightly more sore which was good for now. The last thing you wanted was for anyone to find out about it.

Quickly you threw togther the rest of your things and met the others. According to the village leader there was one more visser out there so we continued our search deeper into the forest. It was around noon when the pain intensified. It started as a constant dull ache but gradually became a burning sensation. It was becoming harder to hide it.

You made up some excuse to the group and sat on top of roach. You were sure if you had to walk anymore you would have fallen over. Luckily for awhile jaskier was more preoccupied with his latest ballad and geralt and yen were wrapped up in some serious conversation. You didnt realize how far you were lagging behind until jaskier turned to you.

"Y/n?" He walked over to you and pulled on roaches reigns making him go a little faster.

"Hm" was all you could manage.

"Are you alright? You're sweating so much"

Confused you ran a hand over your head. He was right, you were and didnt even feel it.

"Yo- sic- rest-" what? Why was Jaskier talking gibberish...and why is he so blurry?

You didnt even feel yourself pitching to the side, just the woosh of air through your ears.

"Y/N!? Y/N what's wrong?!?!" Jaskier barely managed to catch your half conscious form. "GERALT!" The witcher swung around sword at the ready but widened his eyes in shock at what he saw.

Y/n was on the floor, breathing heavily and being propped up by Jaskier.

Geralt and Yennefer quickly ran over. The witchers eyes narrowed in concern when he saw the state of her. She was sweating profusely and looked to be struggling with something. Yennefer raised a hand to her forehead but shook her head. "Its not a fever".

Geralt held her up, lightly smacking her face, he grew even more worried when she didnt react.

"Jaskier what happened"

"I don't know, I noticed she was falling behind so I went to check on her, then I noticed she looked sick, I was telling her we should stop and rest but then she just collapsed. She seemed really out of it too.

At that moment a grunt of pain escaped y/n's lips, and her eyes slowly opened.

You were confused as to why when you opened your eyes, gerald's golden ones were staring at yours with intense concern.

"Y/n can you hear me??" he questioned furrowing his brows.

"I-I ahhhgh" you screwed your eyes shut as the pain intensified. It felt like someone had set your stomach on fire.

This only confused geralt more, "you're hurt" he said as more of a statement.

"Where is the pain y/n," the gentle voice of yennefer surrounded you. Ugh why couldn't she just be a bitch, it would make things so much easier.

You tried speaking but a moan left your lips instead. Fuck this hurt worse than anything you had encountered before.

Geralt closed his eyes as if he had a sudden realization, "you got hit by the visser didnt you"

When you didnt speak but he saw the look in your eyes he knew it was true. "Fuck".

Quickly he began removing your armor and saw the injury peeking from under your shirt. He wasted no time lifting it up just until below your chest. You heard small gasps but were too out of it to know from who.

"Fuck y/n, why didn't you say anything??" Geralt scolded as he examined the wound.

Luckily you didnt have to answer, just focus on breathing heavily.

"Will she be alright?!" The frantic voice of jaskier floated through your ears.

"It would have been better if she told us from the beginning, with a visser attack you need to stay still as much as you can. However by the looks of it she only got hit once, which means she still has a chance."

"What can we do?" Was it yennefer or jaskier who said that?

Geralt pulled a sack from roach and rummaged through it till he pulled out a yellowish filled bottle.

Lifting y/n with one arm he pulled the cork with his teeth and gently placed it between her lips. "Drink y/n" without a second thought you downed the strange liquid coughing as it burned your throat like liquor.

"What is that?" Jaskier asked curiously.

" it's for the pain, it'll make her feel like shes dreaming." Geralt threw her armor onto roach and lifted her up carefully into his arms. "Let's go" he ordered and the troup was once again on their way. Geralt gave one look at the now sleeping y/n and sighed. What was she thinking?

***************************

When you opened your eyes the first thing you did was let out a girlish laugh.

Geralt was surprised for a moment since you had been silently resting in his arms for a long time. "Y/n?"

"Geralt! You've dyed your hair pink! How adorable!" You reached up and pulled at the cotton soft locks.

The witcher sighed, knowing this was the effect of the medicine. Jaskier and yennefer let out a small laugh at the scene of the two.

"Go back to sleep y/n, you need rest" he commanded softly.

"GERALT!" you suddenly exclaimed! "Oh no you cant be the white wolf anymore! Oh no oh no oh no WAIT I GOT IT! YOU CAN BE THE PINK PONY! QUICK JASKIER WRITE THIS DOWN!!"

"Ah yes the witcher, pink pony of the north, has a nice ring to it" jaskier couldn't contain his laughter.

Geralt decide it best to ignore her and keep walking forward.

"Geralt?" He chose to ignore her again. "Geralt....?"

"Gerrrrrallllllt?"

"GERALT!"

"Geralt geralt geralt geralt geralt geralt"

"What?!" He bit out annoyed.

"Do you think I'm pretty? hehe" he was caught off guard and was not sure how to answer. It didnt help the other two were just giggling behind him.

"I um....yeah" he said awkwardly.

"So I dont look like a troll?" You asked earnestly.

"Pfft what?" Now geralt was the one who couldn't control his laughter.

"Don't laugh!" You suddenly pouted. "A long time ago one of my lovers said I looked like a troll when he broke up with me.."

Still amused geralt shifted you to meet his eyes, "No y/n, you do not look like a troll"

"Phew thank god, I dont know what I would have done..." you laid a hand against your head dramatically.

"Now will you please stop squirming and go back to sleep" geralt sighed out.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmm......alright I've decided to go to sleep since I need sleep and it's what I have decided" you saluted the air.

"Finally.." he grumbled.

With a smile you reached both arms around his neck and brought your soft lips to his unshaven cheek.

"Goodnight pinky, sweet creams" he was shocked for a moment then let out an exasperated laugh.

"Goodnight y/n...sweet creams"

******************

To be continued in part 2!

[avellanas-nutty-empire]

Silent Love Part 2

ashkdncnrck im finishing these faster than i thought i would.

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy

Pairing: Axel x OC

Time & Location: Spring of 1990, San Patricio

Summary/Notes: Sorry not sorry, but Axel isnt physically in this chapter, he’s only mentioned :P dont worry i got a real nice fluff thing for part 3 planed that includes him for sure, but for now this part serves as a way to get you more familiar with what kelly is like, and the people she is around most of the time. 

Also heads up, when i have big long chunks of dialog spoken in not English, i will color code them so i dont have to go through the mess of google translate then put the English version in parenthesies. although if i do have like, just a few words that are part of a sentence spoken mostly in English ill do the google translate thing. But this part is spoken all in Irish, and the designated color for that language shall be green :P 

*Shoves in face again* HERE U GO *runs away*

“Alright ladys, let's get to work!” You clap your hands to enthuse the young dancers, clapping to the beat of the music before picking the ice bag back up and lifting it to your forehead.

“Wait, are we on left foot or right foot?” One of the girls asks

“Try it from the beginning” You suggest. “You girls still need some work on the first part - make sure to keep your arms up, don't let them droop. Your not wilted flowers” The music resets to the beginning as the girls line up to their starting positions. From behind, you hear the footsteps of another girl coming down the stairs.

“Have you seen my ghillies, Ms. Kelly?”

“Right here, Breda” You say, indicating the soft leather shoes under the table you sat at with your free hand. She makes a quick beeline towards them, plopping herself on the floor to put them on her feet.

“How's your head doing?” Breda asks while tying her laces.

“Better today, thank you for asking” You respond, looking down at her.

“That man really came out of nowhere”

“He did, but I'm glad. Not much I can do against a gun on my own” You quip 

“I thought we have a restraining order or something on Dick, why didn't he stay away?”

“Because, he is exactly what his name is. A Dick” Breda giggles at this, standing up from the floor with her shoes tied.

“I sure hope that girl and the man are alright. He looked really grumpy when he came in, it scared me a little” You nod in response to her words.

“Yes, he might have been upset for having to save us two” You sigh, looking back at the girls dancing in the cleared out space “But I'm glad everything ended up ok. The bullet barely grazed him, and the girl had only scratches. Easy to patch up. I used some of the salve Aoife left me too, so that should help it heal” Breda looks at you surprised at this.

“You used Aoife’s salve on him? I-”

“It was the least I could do, without him there last night who knows what would have happened. I can't take care of Sinead or help with the pub if I'm dead, and he was in the same danger as me. Wounds can easily get infected if not treated properly” 

“...Well, just make sure to use some on yourself. That alleyway is filthy, who knows what was on the ground where you hit your head" You nod your head in acknowledgement.

“You go on and catch up with the others now, they've done quite a bit without you”

“What!” she whips her head around and marches over towards the other girls. “You guys said you would wait for me!” You laugh at the girls antics before standing up and walking up the stairs. You peak your head through a doorway and lean on the frame

"Hey, Sean. Did you go get baby milk yet, or should I do it myself?" 

"No sorry, I haven't had the chance yet. Take Levy with you, he has something to do also" The man says from his spot at a desk, papers splayed out everywhere. You push off the doorframe and continue down the hall.

"Levy" You call out softly, searching for the young lad. "Will you be ready to go soon?" Peaking your head through another doorway, you see him packing stuff in a bag. He looks up at you when you speak.

“Yes, let's go!” The young boy quickly swings the loaded bag over his shoulder and bounds through the hall and down the stairs.

“Careful!” you call out to him. “Don't fall, Levy!” You follow him back to the first floor and push open the front door, waving a goodbye to the girls as they take their water break. Levy nearly pulls you to the ground trying to get you out of the pub and on your way. “Levy, what did I say! Don't rush or you’ll trip”

“But, Kelly-” He complains

“No but’s, Mister. I don't plan on taking care of another one of your twisted ankles or fractured arms any time soon. Just be patient, all things in good time” Levy pouts slightly at your words, but nonetheless slows down as the two of you make your way towards the market area.

>:( >:( >:( it wont keep the dialog green!!!! anyways just know this whole part is spoken in irish

[waitimcomingtoo]

In Case You Dont Live Forever - Chapter Seven

Pairing: Peter Parker x Venom!reader

Warnings: sexual harassment

Authors note: I changed the point of view. If it’s weird, I’ll change it back.

Masterlist

Peter walked into school that day with an extra bounce in his step. He couldn’t keep himself from leaping over the school gate, not caring who could’ve seen. He was in love. He walked past Flash with confidence, easily brushing off his backhanded comments. He walked up to Ned and felt oddly compelled to click his heels. Ned noticed the ecstatic expression on his best friends face and smirked.

“What’s got you so happy? Did a certain wall crawling superhero finally beat Venom in a fight?” He asked. Peter shook his head.

“Not yet. Something even better happened.” Peter said proudly.

“And what might that be?” Ned asked, adjusting his hat. Peter could barely keep himself from screaming.

“Y/n kissed me.” He exclaimed. He got a few strange looks from passing students who didn’t recognize the name. Peter didn’t care. Nothing could ruin his mood.

“What? When? ” Ned gasped.

“This morning. She slept over last night after she had a nightmare. And guess what else?” Peter asked. Ned bounced up and down.

“What? Tell me!” Ned demanded. Peter looked around for who could be listening and smirked.

“She slept in my bed.” He said.

“Oh.” Ned said. He looked disappointed in the anticlimactic finish.

“With me in it.” Peter added. Ned looked amazed. His jaw hung open and he began to bounce up and down again.

“Dude that’s like the greatest thing ever. She’s so hot! We have to tell everyone.” He exclaimed. Peter tried to quiet him down.

“We’re not telling anyone just yet. She’s only

been my girlfriend for a few hours. She’s really special to me, Ned. I don’t want to treat her like shes some prize I won by telling everyone. Girls are worth more than that. Y/n is my girlfriend, not a trophy.” Peter reasoned. Ned nodded in approval.

“Amen to that. What are you losers talking about anyway?” MJ said as she approached them. She was eating trail mix and looked extremely bored already. The first bell hadn’t even rung.

“Peter has a girlfriend.” Ned blurted. Peter shot him an angry look. MJ looked impressed.

“Oh really? Who is she, your right hand?” MJ smirked. Ned looked confused while Peters face went red.

“It’s not my right hand. She lives in my building and she’s an angel. That’s all you need to know.” Peter grumbled, still annoyed that Ned spilled his secret. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of Y/n, the exact opposite actually. He would shout it from the rooftops that they were together if he could. He just didn’t want everyone to know. They had only kissed that morning. Peter still wanted to keep the magical details to himself.

“Does this angel have a name?” MJ questioned. She was actually interested in something for once.

“No.” Peter said at the same time Ned said “Y/n L/n.”

“Y/n L/n from The L/n Report?” MJ asked. It was the first time Peter or Ned heard emotion in her voice.

“You know her?” Peter asked.

“Duh. She’s the only investigative reporter I’ve seen who actually cares about the people she reports on. I read her articles all the time. We have a lot of the same opinions. I used to think she was the coolest girl ever.” MJ stated. This was the longest conversation either Ned or Peter had ever had with the mysterious girl. It was also the most she ever said at one time.

“Used to think?” Ned asked.

“Well clearly something’s wrong with her if she’s dating Peter.” MJ said. Ned laughed and Peter looked at her angrily.

“There’s nothing wrong with her. She’s absolutely perfect.” Peter defended.

“I know she is. I’ve idealized that girl for year. Did you guy see what she did to Carlton Drake?” MJ pressed. Peter nodded and smiled proudly at the thought of his girl kicking names and taking ass.

“She’s like my hero. She’s done so much for the homeless back in San Francisco. I was so excited when she said she was moving to New York to work for The Daily Bugle.” MJ gushed. Peter and Ned looked at each other, visibly confused.

“Have you always done that?” Ned asked her.

“Done what?”

“Felt things?” Ned said. MJ rolled her eyes.

“I feel very passionate about a lot of things. Those things just don’t happen to include you two or anyone else in this school. However, I am very passionate about your girlfriend.” MJ stated. She suddenly looked a little uncomfortable and unsure of herself, two things MJ never did. She awkwardly turned to Peter.

“Do you think I could meet her? I’d really love to talk to her about her article on fracking.” MJ asked slowly. She wasn’t used to asking people for things. Peters eyes softened at this new side of MJ.

“She’s picking me up from school today on her motorcycle. You can meet her then.” Peter said. MJ did something very out of character. She smiled.

“K thanks.” She blurted and then swiftly left. Ned and Peter laughed as she walked away.

“That was new.” Ned commented.

“Yes It was.” Peter agreed.

“She’s so odd.” Ned added.

“Yes, she is.”

“Did you do the hanky panky with Y/n?” Ned asked. Peter snapped his head towards Ned.

“What? No. And never say ‘hanky panky’ again.” Peter said. Ned shrugged.

“It was worth asking. See you at lunch.” Ned said before walking towards his class. Peter finished getting his books and walked towards his own class. He couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. He wondered what Y/n was up to at that very moment.

At 3:30, you pulled up to Midtown Tech on your motorcycle. You took off your helmet, shook your hair out, and scanned the crowd for Peter. You soon saw him, Ned following shortly behind him, and a girl you had never seen before. She wasn’t wearing makeup, which you gave her props for, and had her curly hair tied back in a pony tail. She was undeniably pretty and had a very cool vibe to her.

“Hi beautiful.” Peter said when he reached you. He wrapped his arms around your waist and hugged you tightly.

“It’s torture not being with you for 8 hours.” He mumbled.

“I know. But schools almost over right? Then we can spend every second together.” You promised. Peter smiled happily. He leaned in slightly, as if asking for your permission, and you did the same. You pressed a soft kiss to his lips. He smiled into the kiss and held you closer. This time, there were no interruptions.

“Y/n, I’d like you to meet MJ. MJ, this is Y/n.” Peter said, gesturing to the girl. MJ smiled shyly at you and held out her hand.

“It’s really cool to meet you, Y/n. Your article on greenhouse gases is hanging on my wall. I’m uh, I’m a big fan.” She said. You smiled brightly at her.

“You’re a fan? That’s amazing. I’ve never met a fan before. It’s really cool to meet you too, MJ. And if you’re interested in the environment, I have a bunch of scientists numbers I can give you. I had to interview a bunch back in San Francisco to write that article. They gave me some great tips on how to reduce my carbon footprint.” You told her. MJ’s eyes widened just a little. She looked baffled and gave you a thankful smile. You noticed one of her front teeth was slightly askew. You decided you liked her already.

“Really? That’d be so cool. Thanks.” She said. I squeezed her arm and nodded.

“I think you and I are going to get along just fine. Can I get your number? I’d love to hear more about what you’re interested in.” You handed MJ your phone and she took it. She typed her number it and handed it back.

“This has been really amazing. Thanks for being so cool. I have to run though. I’m running a protest outside of Oscorp. One of their employees got seriously electrocuted and they’re to cover it up.” MJ explained.

“Really? Is it okay if I tag along? I’m kinda busy with my Cletus Kasady story but I would love to cover your protest too.” You asked. MJ looked amazed.

“You’d do that for me?” She asked as if she wasn’t used to people doing things for her.

“Gladly. Can I join? I can give you a ride there.” You offered. She smiled at you and toyed with the strings on her backpack.

“That’d be great. See you losers later.” MJ gave Peter and Ned a peace sign. You gave Peter a quick peck on the lips and climbed back on your bike. MJ got on and held onto your waist. You two sped off towards Oscorp, leaving Peter and Ned in your wake.

“Dude. MJ just stole your girlfriend.” Ned said.

“Shut up. No she didn’t.” Peter said. Did she though? You seemed to hit it off with her pretty quickly. Peter didn’t know MJ too well but he knew she was guarded and didn’t let people in easily. In fact, she didn’t let anyone in. And yet, you and her had become best friends in a matter of minutes.

Heading back from Oscorp a few hours later, you saw a familiar hat bobbing up and down in the street. You were about to call out Neds name when two guys came from around the corner. They looked mean and you could hear Ned’s heartbeat rising. You quickly ran over to him.

“Hey.” You panted. Ned looked relived to see you.

“Oh hey Y/n. How’d your date with MJ go?” He teased. You shoved him slightly.

“It wasn’t a date. She’s really cool though. I think we’re going to be good friends.” You said as you passed the two guys. You soon heard a whistle.

“Damn baby. Where you going with him? Don’t you wanna stay here and have some fun?” one of the guys called. You and Ned picked up your pace.

“I know you heard me beautiful. Stop running before I give you a reason to run.” The man said again, louder this time.

“Keep walking.” You whispered to Ned.

“I said stop running.” The man shouted, this time, his threat was accompanied by the sound of a gun cocking. You and Ned froze in your steps. The two men slowly approached you, all while pointing the gun level with your head.

“That’s better.” One man said when he reached you. “Now, how about this. You suck my dick, or I shoot your friend. Does that sound fair?” He purred.

“I better call Peter. He’ll know what to do.” Ned panicked.

“No need.” You growled as your transformed into Venom. You marched up to the guy and grabbed him by the shoulders in a death grip. You spit at a nearby newspaper in the ground. The newspaper quickly disintegrated and left nothing but smoke behind. You smiled devilishly at the man, grateful for a chance to show off your acidic saliva.

“What was that?” The man cowered in your grasp. Meanwhile, his friend ran away terrified.

“Acid spit. Still want me to suck your dick?” You asked. The man whimpered and shook his head furiously.

“Didn’t think so. Now, if you don’t tell us the names of ten historical feminists who would be very disappointed in your sorry ass by the time I count to ten, we’re going to eat you. Does that sound fair?” You growled. The man shut his eyes in fear.

“One.” You began to count.

“Uh...” He whimpered.

“Two.”

“Um.” He raked his minuscule brain for answered but came up empty handed.

“Ten.” You said and bit his head off. You quickly ate the rest of his body before turning back into yourself. You wiped your hands and patted your stomach before turning around and making eye contact with Ned. You had completely forgotten he was there.”

“You’re Venom?!” He gasped. You ran up to him and covered his mouth.

“What? No. How do you know about Venom anyway?” You asked. You took your hand off Neds mouth.

“It’s you. I can’t believe it’s you.” Ned exclaimed. You were getting more and more confused.

“You’re Venom. You, Y/n, are Venom.” He repeated as if it all made sense now.

Peters Y/n he thought.

“Play dumb.” Venom whispered.

“What? I’m not Venom. What makes you say that?” You asked.

“Not that dumb!” She yelled. Ned looked at you and laughed. He was still in shock.

“You and Peter are perfect for each other, you know that? You’re both dumb as shit.” He laughed. You had to laugh a little as well.

“You’re Venom and Peter is…do you know about Peter?” Ned suddenly asked.

“What about Peter?” You asked. Neds eyes went wide, and then filled with sadness.

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it. Are you gonna tell him about this? Because I’m going to be very honest with you, I’m terrible at keeping secrets. I don’t know if I can keep this from him.” Ned said. I nodded at him in understanding.

“I’m gonna tell him eventually. Please, don’t say anything. He has to hear it from me. I’m sorry that I’m making you lie to your best friend but this is a very unique situation.” I said. Ned blew out a breath.

“It’s a lot more unique than you think.” He muttered. “I won’t tell him.”

“Thank you.” You hugged him tightly, thankful that he was safe and keeping your secret. You walked Ned home and began to make your way back to the apartment building. You wanted nothing more than to cuddle with Peter and forget the day. You missed him all day at school. It was bearable when you guys were just friends, but now that he was your boyfriend you never wanted to be apart.

When you were just a few blocks from your apartment, you felt a strong arm wrap around your neck and hold you in place. Suddenly, there was a knife to your throat.

“I saw what you did to my buddy, you little freak. Now, how about you get down on those pretty little knees before I kill you?” The man threatened. You turned your neck as much as you could and recognized your attacker as the mans friend who ran away from earlier. You sighed deeply. You were full and trying to keep your body count to a minimum. You shut your eyes and we’re about to turn into Venom when you heard a voice from behind you.

“Now that’s no way to treat a lady.” The voice rang. You recognized it as Peters voice. The guy was quickly pulled away from you as if by some kind of rope. You heard some sort of webbing going on behind you and small cries of struggling from the man.

“Are you alright Miss?” Peter asked.

“I’m fine Peter.” You finally turned around but instead of seeing your boyfriend, you saw the friendly neighborhood pain in the ass. He had webbed your attacked to the wall and was now looking right at you. You had seen him so many times before, and he’d seen you, but never like this. You felt almost naked, standing before Spider-Man as Y/n instead of Venom.

“Oh.” You said, startled. “I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.”

“Yea. This is a pretty popular outfit.” Spider-Man joked, gesturing to his skin tight suit. You bit your tongue. He was funny, but you couldn’t let him know that. You were enemies after all. He just didn’t realize it was you.

“Thanks for saving me.” You blurted. “But I had the situation handled.”

“You’re right. You especially looked like you had it handled when he was about to stab and murder you.” Spider-Man said sarcastically. You found him oddly charming, despite your history.

“What are you gonna do with him?” You asked, pointing to the man webbed to the wall.

“I heard what he said to you. I’m going to register him as a sex offender and ruin his life. Unless, you had other plans. You know, since you had the situation handled.” Spiderman remarked. You playfully rolled your eyes. You did have other plans. Plans that involved eating him and digesting him while you cuddled with Peter. But Spider-Mans plan was okay too.

“Alright. I’ll see you around Spider-Man.” You said, giving the superhero one last look. There was something familiar about him. Spider-Man nodded.

“See you around. And please, be careful. Don’t walk alone. I don’t want to see you get hurt.” He said and turned back to the man.

You went home, showered, and got into some comfy clothes. You missed your boyfriend dearly and went to his apartment to see him.

After being let in by May, you went into Peters room and flopped on his bed. He was sat at his desk doing homework.

“Did you mean what you said about me sleeping over whenever I wanted?” You asked, voice muffled by his pillow.

“Of course I did.” He swiveled around to look at you and noticed your body language.

“What’s wrong, love?”

“I’ve had a long day and I want to cuddle my boyfriend.” You pouted. Peter smiled at you calling him your boyfriend. He closed his textbook and climbed into bed with you. You rested your head on his chest, right over his heart. The sound of his heartbeat calmed you down and you felt sleepy.

“Did you make any progress on your story?” He asked. You shook your head as he began to run his fingers through your hair. You hummed in content and pressed a small kiss to his neck. He blushed at the affection and held you closer.

“No. I’ve had the worst writers block all day. I was actually thinking of writing an article on Spider-Man until my writers block went away.” You said. After your encounter with the masked hero, you wanted to know more about him. Sure, there are plenty of articles on Spider-Man out there, but you knew him intimately.

You felt Peters heart stop momentarily.

“Spider-Man? Why?”

“I think I have a pretty good shot at figuring out who he is. Like, think about it, he only operates from the hours of 4 to midnight ish right? Except, on weekends, when he’s seen all throughout the day. What’s he doing all day on weekdays? He can’t be at work because jobs don’t end that early. I think he’s in school. Either high school or college. But college schedules are very flexible. My best guess is he’s a high school student.” You said. You were very good at your job. You loved piecing together information and getting the full story.

“Oh wow.” Peter said, dumbfounded. He was usually blown away by your intelligence, but now it was working against him. There are a million high school students in New York, though. Surely you wouldn’t figure it out.

“And think about this, he’s only ever in New York, so he must live here right? But what about that one time he saved those kids in the Washington Monument? What was New York’s superhero doing in Washington? Well I looked into it and the kids he saved were on a field trip. What if Spider-Man was on the field trip too? If I look up all the schools that were there, I could create a list of suspects and go form there. Then, I could-“ you were cut off with a kiss.

“Let’s not talk about Spider-Man. I want to hear about you day. How was Oscorp?”

“We had a really good time. I interviewed her after I helped her with the protest and then we grabbed lunch. Oh, and I saw Ned on my way home.” You recalled.

“You saw Ned?” Peter asked. Ned hadn’t mentioned seeing you.

“Yea. These two guys attacked us. One ran away and I took care of the other. But then the one that ran away came back and you’ll never guess who saved me. “

“Who?” Peter smiled. He knew who.

“Spider-Man. I don’t know. I was wrong about him. I used to think he was just some guy in spandex with a God complex but now I think he just genuinely wants to help people. And…” you trailed off.

“And?”

“He’s got a nice ass.” You admitted. Peter laughed loudly. You smiled into his chest. You loved that damn laugh.

“I’m serious. I saw it as he walked away and it knocked me out. Spider-Man is dummy thick.”

“Please never say the words “Spider-Man is dummy thick” in my house again.” Peter pleaded. He secretly loved it though.

“I was actually thinking of making that the title of my article.” You joked. Peter laughed again. He chucked a pillow at you and you giggled.

“Let’s go to bed. In a romantic, but still non sexual way this time.” You said, your exhaustion hitting you finally as you yawned.

“Good night my Nancy Drew.” Peter said.

“Goodnight my whoever Nancy Drew was boning.” You yawed again.

“Ned Nickerson.” Peter laughed.

“Then goodnight Ned Nickelodeon.” You said, half asleep.

“Close enough.” Peter smiled.

Tag List 🏷

@monimiin @truthdaze @honeyccoated @constellationswithapurpose @condy-wants-a-cookie @zipp0flare @vxidnik @maddie-laufeyson @bubblegumholland @the-blindwatcher @pmvelez97 @deanismygodwiththatwhistle

[subarashiet]

lifes been weird and sad , got so much stuff i wanna say dont even know if thats the right subred to but here goes.i m 18 , from Greece , first year in Uni and life is not the way i want it to bei live on my own , rent is being paid by mom and her husband , month pocket money given by dad and by my part time jobat some point in high school i understood that our school years were our most carefree years , tho only now do i really understand itman this post is gonna cramp my fingers shouldve used the pcused to hang out a lot till 2nd year of high school then in 3rd year cause of me studying more i was hanging out less , used to have around 4groups of ppl to hang around then only one , cliche but i wasnt anyone special in school , gotta mention i went to a music middle-high school , only highlights i remember are in 2th-3rd grade trading blows with a girl (think she was 5th grade) ,3rd grade kissing a girl in her cheek then running away from the boy-horde coming after me , 4th grade trading blows with a 6th grader ,6th grade punching a guy for calling names my little sis (we good now see him out we talk he a nice dud) , 9th grade a girl i had a chance with but fucked it up big time , 9th grade breaking a cello almost getting expelled ,12th grade playing bass at a concert in Thessaloniki with a music group of my schooldidnt really have many close friends but there were some from school and other places you can call closer friends , but now even with them i ve started to fade away which i cannot bear but i m the type of giving up and not trying until i m lategot laboratory this morning and this is gonna take a while hope i can get some sleepfeels weird using reddit to express my thoughts i even find it a bit cringy talking to myself but oh welli wanted to visit a physiatrist because i ve been so mentally tired that i think i might have crippling sadness xD but i tried to arrange that back in July-August pre my 18th bday so she said a parent was required to be present so i just kept all the stuff to myselfi was learning classic guitar from 1st grade to 8th still play to this day , in music school i kinda learned h2p electric but didnt practice enough to be able to play good , also know some pianobeen listening to post rock and mostly fate music these past 10 monthssucker for good anime tho i ve been out of it lately havent even finished my summer ones , oregairu has a nice ending from what i got spoiled fromanyway thing is i am sad most of the time , i try not to show it cause i like the stereotype of being the strong guy that everyone can depend on and almost never see being emotional and also like the cool tempered guy type , tho lately i ve been craving a lot of attention that i drop the act of the calm n cool sometimesthings with my parents didnt go to well these past years , only now i can say that we ve finally kinda calmed down , mom and dad started falling out of it around 8th grade cause lots of fighting , big sis kindof took the role of mother while on her teen years , feels like she had it much worse than me10th grade sis leaves home to go elsewhere to start studies for uni , i m left with ma and lil sis back homethen i understand that i have to be there for my little sis which also got in my school that year (3kids-3years difference each) so i tried to assume the role of the big brother but she was closer to her older sister than me , i was closer to my older sister as well , feels like i was doing my lil sis wrong but i cpould relate more to big sis and could chat with her more about stufflil sis didnt open up to me a lot even to this day , she has been a lot more comfortable with me through the years i think cause she told me something important recently , kinda feelsbadman tho cause i wanted to be closer to her and i kinda tried but i think not hard enough cause she didnt seem to get any closer , cried once about it in front of my mother which was the absoluteliest worst cause i didnt want her to see me being fragile jesustho even now that i m not home i talk to her play some among us tried making her start xenoverse 2 that didnt go farhave some friends from school , we would only go all together at internet cafes , but mostly 4 of em would go out togetherin my school i had some friends from scouts tooi have an insta , used to post "cool" pics kinda stopped cause i like looking cool in front of others but i havent been in the mood to try in around a year nowused to be in some conservatory guitar groups with some other kids there , with one girl from there i used to be quite in touch until recently that i stopped seeing her for some reasons maybe i ll explain l8rwe had fun and i really mean it , we used to go on trips to play songs on different cities and stages , our group became kinda known the 2-3 good active years we were active , it still is but these years were the originals , now there are other peoplefucking christ its 2:27started playing in that group with the originals in 2017 till 2019 , we were kids from different ages going from 6th to 10th graders but i didnt understand the different in our ages until recently that i found one of the guys from the group in my cityanother closer friend is a guy from my school , met him in grade 7 still talk to him , used to sit together most of the years pretty neat guy , peculiar character but really interesting kind smart and hard workingman why couldnt my teen years be like shirou from fsn that would be awesomehad entrance exams 4-5 months ago , didnt really go as planned , shooted for Corfu didnt get in cause rather than 15 i got 10 in my last exam so i m still in my city , tho i live alone and go to my local uni insteadJuly 2019 i moved out of my old house moved in with ma and her husband with my sis , stayed there till september then till june-july 2020 i was living with my fathertbh i decided to write this post after watching a vid of Korone talking about Okayu thinking that i ve never been in an actual relationship and that i eould want to experience that but dont know where to start from , losing weight ? becoming outgoing again ? learn how to talk to girls ?i started watching anime back in 2015 on my 3ds i remember watching dubbed Inazuma Elevensince like 2 weeks ago i reached 201 anime completedok i ll stop here for tonight cause i got online uni classes tmrw i keep stimestamps for whenever i finally post this -Tuesday 3/11/2020 02:41used to be around 85-90kg in 12th grade , put on around 20-28 kilos since March 2020 , managed to lose 8-10 kilos in the summer but i m still around 30kilos up from the normal amount based on my height , got a subscription to a gym jan2019 but only managed to get into it for a short period on spring 2019 then autumn 2019 then lost motivation and let go , since March2020 i ve been doing some weights at home , tho when i look at myself in the mirror it doesnt really change how bad i feel about my body , i think my old motivation used to be a girl i used to have a crush on but not surethings with my parents werent all that great and i was mentally better when i would talk with them , they are openminded af and supportive too but puberty makes you see stuff differently like everyone is against you like the world is against you (last one might be true dunno yet) , living on my own now seems to be a bit better but as our Greek ancestors used to say theres no good without bad and the bad in this scenario is that its lonely as fuck , having lived for 18 years with my family it really hits a weird spot , everything feels lonelier now with the virus spreading around not being able to see others as much as we used to , uni doesnt feel nice , many people dont pay attention and its like the second half of 12th grade all over againgot my monthly money 4days ago , went from 200 to 9.28 quickly , when i have money i spend when i dont i m stingy , mostly like to build computers , watch lots of Linus , Paul , Kyle , Jay etc. most of my money goes to buying stuff about computers food , used to give lots of money to internet cafes when i used to hang out with the guys from school , not anymorewith the start of uni we all met new friends even i but i still feel like i am drifting apart day by day , stopped talking to my old girl friend cause i was kinda done with her attitude , called me some names i didnt appreciate because i put up with her attitude , most of the time in her own world , only would really pay attention and try to change herself when it was something she cared about , one of them wasnt her character , but to give the goods of her she was a good friend dont know if i can say she still is a friend or just someone i know , she helped me even with the girl i had a crush on , was really fun on trips with the guitar group , all in all a fun person , thing is i stopped texting her and telling her to go out cause it was 80% me trying and the other 20% her and i think that proved right when i stopped talking to her cause i thought she will see that i m not talking to her she ll think somethings wrong she ll message me to go out and have fun , send me a happy bday message posted some pics of me , didnt send me anything else after , stopped talking to her around the start of October , if i hadnt asked her something about her uni and if it wasnt my bday i dont think we wouldve talked in all of october . last saturday i was working in the area she lives in my city decided to call her sometimes didnt answer tried to suprise her and see how she is by going to her house , noone answered maybe they were on a trip idk , but it feels weird man , in the first half of the year me and a common friend of her and me went out one night , ended up being the bad guy to make her understand that she did something wrong that night , after she left i was left with our common friend talked about stuff and mostly her and i expressed myself , i knew that coming summer me and her would end up at different places so i wanted to tell her all the wrongs with her so that she could finally understand what i ve been putting up against and make her understand that she HAS to pay attention to people around her and that she will meet new people and that she ll have to be careful about her character , used to have a bit of crush on her back in 7th grade , can kinda understand why that went . On the other hand i didnt want to part ways with her with our last words being me ranting , one thing brought the other and she wont be going to her uni's city until early 2021 so i managed to go out with her some more in the summer and september . kinda feels bad to see that almost noone remembered my bday cause i remember in cram school when someone had their bday they would get a fucking cake , dont mistake me i got one , from my ma my two sisters and my moms husband , thing is i wanted to have something happen with friends , nothing happend , around 4 people remembered my bday and the others just send me some happy bday messages after seeing posts from the girl i m talking about .also heres a good song to listen to while reading stuff on reddit Sorrow from FSN by MN64 cant post links from what i understandgonna stop here for now might edit later -Tuesday 3/11/2020 15:15thing is reddit is not the right place to get help and i need a friend but it seems i cant get any from my friends , even my other friend the guy i used to sit with in all middle-high school he has drifted apart , talking more with other of his friends doing other stuff etc , that one time i needed to talk to him he said i ll call you in a while , waitied 1 and a half hour then asked him why he didnt call he said he forgot (i think) , feelsbadmananyway i dont think i m gonna keep editing this i ranted enough , gonna leave the post up for a day or so in case anyone wants to add anything then taking it down -Tuesday 3/11/2020 23:58

[jessefandomunited]

crack fic part one

if any of you guys want something competently idiotic about criminal minds here it is enjoy

chapter 1

“We need to introduced ourselves to them,” I said and we idled in our golf cart outside the office of the BAU. We still we unsure how we got in the universe of Criminal minds in the first place but we were here not and we were ready to help. This was at the very beginning, not of the show itself but Reids first day in the BAU with his team, because of this we decided introductions were in order We decided to send one letter to each of the team individually but making it all the same note. We definitely knew we were putting ourselves as the number one suspect in any of the crimes they were solving but, whatever we could leave at any time how, well, we have a time machine, or an alternate reality time machine. We’re not 100% sure how to get back to our own time but in the meantime we decided to have fun with the Criminal Minds gang and try and bring some laughter to the very somber show.

We sat in front of a computer and Khyra asked, “ Okay, what are we typing out?” We brain stormed a moment and finally came up with the following.

“ Dear Team, Yes we are not in your team like it or not. We are not your enemy and we only wish to bring you aid when need be and to bring you joy. We are well familiar with how you guys operate and you guys are always so sad, except Penelope , Penelope I think we’re gonna get along the best. We know the future pretty much and as much as you think we’re crazy and if we wanted to be super creepy we could tell you some future things but I think the butterfly effect would shatter or something like that. Yes Reid I would love to hear you rattle off all the butterfly effect theory right now but unfortunately this is a note and we cannot hear you. But hey we know you love writing notes well maybe not love, but you write a lot of notes so please write us back . Sorry off topic. This is Khyra butting in she always gets off topic when talking about Reid , he’s not narcissistic at all but he might with Amy hanging around. Off topic again all in all we are looking forward to seeing you and while you may all discard these letters however i’d advise you to at least keep our lovely picture we are sending you, so you’ll know what our lovely faces look like. Also don’t try anything tricky with the locks on the doors in your building or extra surveillance because I promise you it’s not going to work. Also if you want us to come in for questioning at any time we’d love to however all we ask is for your to do the thing where you put our names on empty boxes of files. That is it look forward to meeting you all .

All the warmest wishes in the world: Amy and Khyra” We printed out a copy for each one and took a bunch of stupid pictures with my poleroid to put in each letter. And on the envelopes we added some special little jokes and phrases like for Elle we put “ Hold this L”. For Giddeon, “ look out for the 6 fingered man” . For Penelope , “ we’re gonna be incredible friends”. For Hotch, “ the Criminal minds Lassy”. For JJ “ the Criminal minds Juliette”. For Derek “ BROTP Derek and Penelope” And for Reid “please dont be mad at me  <3 Amy”. I was very concerned that he wouldn’t appreciate our little charade so I just wanted to apologize in advance. We prepared each letter and were bold enough to even drop them off at the front desk ourselves before leaving to get slurpies and design our crime fighting outfits.

We decided on these weird shirts we found at good will that say traffic cop, these plaid skorts, white iridescent platform shoes and white oval sunglasses to finish it off. “ We’re gonna be unforgettable for sure,” I chuckled, “ I wonder if they read our note yet.” “ Well if we go there and immediately take us in for questioning i’d say that’s a win,” Khyra added. I nodded and we slowly walked over to the BAU building and decided to just sit on the wall for a bit an wait. In about ten minuets Hotch came out and when he saw us he immediately went back in. “ Awwwww Lassy recognizes us,” I said clutching my hand to my heart. “ Yeah he’s definitely getting backup, “ Khyra laughed, “ you want Reid to lead you in.” I shook my head, “ you know he wont be able to, it’s his first day, but he’s probably gonna be watching us.” The door opened and Hotch came out with three armed officers, “ please bring them in.” “ Can I please finish my Slurpee , this was a whole dollar man ,” I pleaded. “ Whatever you need to  answer to a few things,” He said with his signature stoic face. I clapped my hands, “ don’t worry we know where to go.” He was about to say what when we both took off into the building waving at the different people as we went as the guards followed us . “ REID LET’S CATCH US LATER OKAY,” I yelled as we passed his desk. He looked slightly scared. We found the interrogation room and sat ourselves on the chair and put our feet up on the table. “ Thank goodness they didn’t try to shoot us,” Khyra said with a sigh. “ Ugg that was my exercise for like ever,” I said leaning back. Hotch stumbled into the room, shocked to see us here, “who...who are you guys.” “ Someone didn’t read the note carefully, “ I said, “ listen we may as well be ghosts here, look us up we’ll give you our drivers license, well our old ones if you want to actually keep it, I still may need mine .” We both dug around in our pockets and slapped them on the table. “ Penelope, if your listening we know you’ll be doing the searching you goddess among men,” Khyra yelled before leaning back. Hotch reluctantly left and we made a  beeline for the two way mirror. “ So you think they’re all on the other side,” I said jabbing Khyra in the side. “ Most of them probably aside from Penelope ,” she deduced . “ Hey Reid...Spencer...Spence… Dr Spencer Reid, which should I call him,” I pleaded , “ he liked being called Spence when JJ does it but he dosent know us yet, so maybe formal.” Khyra nodded, “ yes don’t scare him , he get’s enough of that later .” I shook my head and my eyes welled up with tears, “ oh I know,you best bet we’re going to have to help out with that.” “ Butterfly effect ,” Khyra reminded me . “Fuck I forgot about that,” I mumbled then turned to the two way mirror and got really close so I could somewhat see. I noticed he was there and positioned myself so I was looking at him directly, “ gees this is a lot easier when I just see myself. Dr Spencer Reid, you are a wonderful , caring , smart , nerdy , glorious person and I want you to know especially that we come in peace.” both me and Khyra but up the Spock hand sign things “ we too are fellow nerds.” The door swung open and Hotch marched in, “ cut that out and sit down, how did you know he was in there anyway?” “ You can kind of see when you get really close,” I explained , “ soooo did you find out we are ghosts?” He shook his head, “ no I found out these are fake id’s .” Me and Khyra exchanged a glance then laughed , “ yes absolutely, you know it’s about as fake as your hopes of planning a lovely week long break.” “ This is serious,” he sneered .I held up a hand, “ okay one, you didn’t even get our boxes like we wanted, and two you have no right to hold us here, at the moment you guys don’t have a serious case yet, and sheesh it’s my boi Reids first day relax you’re gonna scare him off like you did his friend.” He was shocked. “ We’ve overstayed our welcome,” Khyra whispered . The door was still open . We shrugged, “ gotta blast.” Immediately we sprinted out yelling, “ next time we want our boxes!!!” People tried to stop us but we were able to get to the gogo cart just in time. We waved as we slowly began moving through time.

[coolguycoconutchutney]

shrub @meethapaan tagged me in this quarantine 10 song 10 question thing and I can’t sleep so I’ll do it bc I can

10 quarantine songs (this is just going to be randomly pulled from my April 2020 playlist (yes I’m aware it’s not April yet I usually start the next months playlist a few days early so I don’t add a new song to a current months playlist and miss out on it I just overestimated how much of March had passed and I accidentally started it on like the 14th but whatever))

1. Manners - Ashnikko

2. sriracha- bbno$

3. The Blinding ft Travis Scott - Jay Electronica

4. White Ferrari - Frank Ocean

5. Franklin the Flirt - Porches

6. Paper Bag - Miss Fiona Apple

7. Kerosene! - Yves Tumor

8. Hit My Phone ft Kehlani - Megan Thee Stallion

9. Let’s Pretend - Del Water Gap

10. Stressed - UPSAHL

Okay question time

Are you staying home from work/school?

Technically I’m between school and work rn so no but I am staying home.

If you’re staying home, who is with you? 

My parents and my thoughts

Who would be your ideal quarantine mate?

My fwiends or at least maybe someone my age it would be nice to have conversation with someone my age and I’m really bad at initiating phone calls so I don’t ever bother calling my friends rn

Are you a homebody?

This is a good question. The first couple months of this year yes because I was trapped in a cycle of not going anywhere so I can work on my senior project and then I don’t do my senior project so I just sat at home not getting anything done. But like ideally, I like being out and about and seeing things I just (im so sorry) hate the mall so much and window shopping but I just want to sit around and hang out w my friends and do stuff like watch bad media and so ouid oeffects and play games and I also really want to go to the club and be a th*t

An event you were looking forward to that got canceled?

Hee hee hoo hoo a good question. Well. Starting my JOB and MOVING OUT for one. Well. I honestly don’t know the state of my job rn. Because I emailed the recruiter last week and when I looked her up on LinkedIn today she doesn’t even work there anymore and no one told me and so I emailed their offer ops directly today and I’m waiting to hear back from them and I haven’t really heard much from them so I’m so excited for them to say oh haha you were never actually hired actually Hee hee hoo hoo. Also idk if I would have been gone by then but the gayng had tickets to 100 gecs. Also tinos birthday. I just miss my friends dog. Also I was going to meet up w this nice man and watch train to busan. He asked me to go on a run w him yesterday and it would have been fun but you know social distancing :/

What movies have you watched recently?

I have like 0 energy to watch any movies. I like movies and like thinking about them and stuff but I just have 0 available emotional energy to watch them. But I think I last watched he’s just not that into you. And I think the jumanji movies on the plane. And I saw this Malalayalam movie in theaters called varane avashyamund, which pleasantly surprised me in terms of how malayalam movies go.

What shows are you watching?

Nothing really, Tiger King and bits and pieces of Family Karma when my mom watches it. I rewatched season 2 of American Vandal last week it’s a shame it got cancelled it was a genuinely good show, shout out Italian king jaboukie for writing on it

What music are you listening to?

God I don’t really listen to a lot of music rn idk why but a lot of Fiona Apple and Ashnikko. Also I put tik tok songs on my running playlist so that.

What are you reading? 

I just finished 1Q84 and Into the Dreamhouse, and I’m looking for something new to start so if anyone has recs hmu pleaseeeee I think I should start Interpretor of Maladies wams recommended to me in December. Someone also recommended Acheron to me.

What are you doing for self-care? 

Uhhh I’ve been drawing a lot, I’m pretty shit ngl but I’m just practicing to you know, not be shit. I’m actually making terrible 1Q84 fan art rn kms. I’ve also been going on my daily state sanctioned runs and doing my home workouts (shout out miss chloe ting) and jumproping. I’ve been talking to my friends when I can remember. I think I’m going to start this udemy class I got on sale a month ago on front end development so my brain doesn’t completely dissolve

Uhhhh I really dont give a shit if you do it or not I did this because I have insomnia but uhh do this if you want

@cherrybutchh @pocketful-of-mumbles (wams i don’t know why I tag you in things i know you don’t do them I get it but why do I tag u) @queer-assthetic @swiing-tree @scramblelikeanegg @cigaretteinthemouth (hi we never talked before but I see ur @ in my notifications and we’re mutuals so hi if you don’t want to do this it’s really fine)

[healthmessenger]

The Actual Coronavirus diet…according to HealthMessenger

On March 23, the World Food Programme issued guidelines on the “do’s” and “dont’s” of eating while on quarantine. In last week’s article, I gave my take on each of the 7 tips on keeping a healthy diet in the face of coronavirus…according to the WFP…   

Some of you subsequently reached out to ask what my guidelines would be. Even though I have not personally contracted the virus…yet…and havent had to quarantine, I did preventatively tweak my diet;

Full Disclosure…

As some of you already know, I strongly advocate for low carb diets, especially when tackling auto-immune diseases such as type-2 diabetes, high blood pressure, asthma, etc… . I myself have recently adopted a modified Ketogenic diet in an attempt to rebalance my macros to boost my immune system. The “modified” part comes with the addition of low GI fruits(strawberries, raspberries, kiwi, apples, pears, apricots, tomatoes) and low GI starches(sweet potatoes) around workouts in order to maintain a high metabolic rate. I have also started supplementing with Vitamin D in order offset the lack of sun exposure. That’s enough about me though… . Let’s see what the science has to say…

Low-carb nutrition and immune function

On Number 15, 2019 a study published in ScienceImmunology showed that mice fed a Ketogenic diet for seven days were protected from a lethal flu virus by increasing the number of specialised immune cells in their lungs. But interestingly, this protection only came once the mice had metabolically adapted to the high-fat diet. Giving exogenous ketones without the metabolic adaptation did not confer the same benefit.  Obviously, that’s a far cry from saying a keto diet will do the same for influenza in humans or for COVID-19, simply because 1)Humans are not mice and 2)something tells me we can’t do the same study where we purposely infect people with a lethal influenza strain. To be completely honest, the paper is incredibly dense with detailed discussion of the immunologic and genetic responses, but I think the basic conclusion is good enough. The metabolic adaptation to a ketogenic diet can affect the function of the immune system to the point where it can prevent a lethal infection. But one question we should ask is, if we follow a diet that is proven to help with weight loss and metabolic health and may also beneficially affect immune function, wouldn’t it be worth trying? What do we have to lose?

Quality, quality, quality…

So, now more than ever, you might want to jump on a low-carb diet. I am not going to debate which LCHF diet is the best, simply because there is no clear cut answer to that question and also because I have partially answered that question in a previous article. Having said that, the quality (nutritional density) of the food you choose must prevail over the underlying food category (fruits vs vegetables vs meat vs etc…) promoted by the diet you eventually decide to pick. I don’t care wether you are vegan, carnivore or anything in between, the quality of the ingredients/foods you pick must be of the highest quality possible. That is as organically grown as available in your area. You are better off eating a grass-fed, grass finished steak over an “enhanced” apple(genetically modified with added sugar). Vice versa, you are better off eating an organically grown apple from your grandmothers’ apple tree over an antibiotic treated piece of meat. The same rule of thumb applies across food categories. Simply pay a  bit more attention to the labels and do not hesitate to ask your well-intentioned butcher/gardener.

Cook your Food

France’s health and safety agency (ANSES) convened an expert group to investigate whether the COVID-19 disease can be potentially transmitted via contaminated food.

In light of the scientific knowledge available, ANSES has suggested transmission through food could occur if a person infected with the virus prepares or handles food with dirty hands – and contaminates it.   

“This could concern all types of food (animal or plant products),” ​noted the agency​. “Furthermore, while there is no evidence to suggest that consumption of contaminated food can lead to infection of the digestive tract, the possibility of the respiratory tract becoming infecting during chewing cannot be completely ruled out.”​

As with other known coronaviruses, the novel coronavirus is sensitive to cooking temperatures, ANSES continued. “Heat treatment at 63​°C for four minutes (temperature used when preparing hot food in mass catering) can therefore reduce contamination of a food product by a factor of 1,000.”​

ANSES has reiterated that cooking food and observing good hygiene practices when handling and preparing food are effective at preventing contamination of the novel coronavirus.

Load up on fruits, vegetables, nuts and seeds

This one sounds like a no brainer…until you adopt a low-carb diet. Studies after studies have shown that the consumption of fruits, vegetables, nuts and seeds is obviously a common recommendation when it comes to strengthening ones immunity.  I would recommend 2-3 pieces of low GI fruits(below 50) per day and at least 5 vegetables(below 30) a day. As far as nuts and seeds are concern, choose raw over salted. Portions will vary on an individual basis. A hand full per day is good rule of thumb though. Forget about the rainbow 

Stay the hell away from refined carbs and sugars

I know how tempting it can be to reach out to cookies whilst binging on the latest Netflix series, awaiting for the quarantine to end …but please…dont… .

Laboratory evidence suggests sugar impairs white blood cell function and triggers acute rises in blood sugar, leading to an increased risk of infections and complications. Therefore, it would make sense that we want to limit these blood sugar elevations. Refined carbohydrates and simple sugars are two of the biggest offenders for blood sugar spikes and should therefore be eliminated.

This is not to say that studies show avoiding these foods results in fewer infections. (We don’t have that clear evidence.)

However, one simple solution is to use the measurement of your own blood sugar as a guide. If higher blood sugar is associated with more complications, it makes sense we want to limit that. I suggest measuring your blood sugar either with a regular glucometer or, even better, with a continuous glucometer (CGM) if you have access to one. If the foods you eat cause your blood sugar to rise above 140mg/dl (7.8mmol/L), consider eating something different.

Again studies show that a low-carb, moderate protein, higher fat diet effectively reduces blood sugar and can even reverse type 2 diabetes. We don’t have proof that this will “boost your immune system,” but it may help keep blood sugars in check which may be associated with decreased infectious risk.

Chicken soup/bone broth

Treating colds and the flu with chicken soup may be the most popular urban myth of all time. Surprisingly, it may not be 100% a myth. One study showed chicken soup “inhibited neutrophil migration,” which the authors suggest could improve our ability to recover from infections. However, this is one of those instances where laboratory findings may not translate to clinical improvements such as fewer or less serious infections. But it’s hard to argue with a tasty homemade soup with chicken(grass-fed), a few low-carb veggies, and plenty of real salt. Immune booster or not, it sounds like a great meal for a period in self-isolation.

Herbs and Spices

Turmeric

Turmeric is a spice commonly used in Indian and Asian cuisine, including curries. It contains a bright-yellow compound known as curcumin, which emerging research suggests might enhance immune function. However, there isn’t any convincing evidence showing that it helps fight viral infections yet. On the other hand, adding turmeric to your food adds flavour, and taking a curcumin supplement is unlikely to cause any harm in otherwise healthy people. If you have any medical conditions — especially if you take blood thinners — check with your doctor before supplementing with curcumin.

Echinacea

Echinacea is an herb that can reportedly help prevent the common cold. But is this reputation well-deserved? A recent systematic review of randomised trials found that echinacea may possibly have a mild protective effect against upper-respiratory infections but doesn’t appear to reduce the length or severity of illness. While it’s impossible to say whether it might offer any protection against COVID-19, it appears to be safe to take on a short-term basis. If you’re at high risk, you may consider taking it for the next several weeks.

Garlic

Garlic, a popular and pungent herb with a characteristic aroma, is widely believed to have antibacterial and antiviral effects, including helping to fight the common cold. A 2014 randomised controlled trial did find that people who took a garlic supplement had fewer colds and recovered more quickly from colds than people who didn’t take garlic. Although this is encouraging, this is just one study. Other high-quality trials are needed to confirm whether garlic is truly beneficial for the common cold or other upper-respiratory infections. For now, enjoy garlic for its zesty flavour and unmistakable aroma rather than counting on it to boost your immunity during the coronavirus pandemic.

Supplements

Vitamin C

For decades, Vitamin C has been used to help prevent the common cold. Among other functions, this vitamin can help maintain healthy skin that provides a barrier to germs and other harmful invaders. In addition, some — but not all — studies suggest it may improve the function of certain white blood cells that fight infection. In addition, there is conflicting evidence about the potential mortality benefits of high dose Vitamin C for patients with sepsis, the most severe form of systemic infections. While it’s unclear whether taking a Vitamin C supplement is beneficial for COVID-19, for most people there’s no harm in taking up to 2,000 mg per day (the upper limit set by the National Academy of Medicine).

For smokers and high-risk individuals, it’s definitely worth considering. Vitamin C is water-soluble, so your body will excrete whatever you don’t need into your urine. However, at very high doses, Vitamin C may cause diarrheas or increase the risk of kidney stones (especially in men), so be sure not to exceed 2,000 mg daily.

Vitamin D

As both a hormone and a vitamin, Vitamin D plays a number of important roles in health. In recent years, people have taken very high doses of Vitamin D with the intention of boosting immunity. But is this an effective tactic? A 2017 systematic review of 25 randomised trials found that taking a Vitamin D supplement seemed to have a mild protective effect against respiratory-tract infections in most people, but provided much greater protection in those who were very deficient in Vitamin D. If your Vitamin D levels are low, you may have a better chance of staying well if you supplement with 2,000 IU per day (or more, with medical supervision). Many — perhaps even most — people are deficient in vitamin D. So it’s probably wise to take a Vitamin D supplement right now, especially if you’re at increased risk for COVID-19. Of course, your body can make Vitamin D on its own when your skin is exposed to sunlight, so try to get some sun whenever you can. How much sun depends on the time of year and your location. A good starting point is 15 minutes of exposure to a large body part (such as the torso or back). Just remember to avoid sunburns, as excess sun exposure carries its own risks

Zinc

Zinc is a mineral involved in the white blood cell response to infection. Because of this, people who are deficient in zinc are more susceptible to cold, flu, and other viruses. One meta-analysis of seven trials found that supplementing with zinc reduced the length of the common cold by an average of 33%. Whether it could have a similar effect on COVID-19 isn’t yet known. Taking supplementary zinc may be a good strategy for older people and others at increased risk. If you decide to take zinc, make sure to stay below the upper limit of 40 mg per day, and avoid administering nasally, due to the risk of olfactory complications.

Fasting

With all the focus on how certain foods affect your immune system, you may also wonder, what about fasting? As counterintuitive as this one may sound, fasting protocoles are proving more and more effective at boosting immune functions..

One study in mice showed that fasting, or more specifically refeeding after a fast, restored immune function that had been suppressed by chemotherapy. During the fasting period itself, however, fasting appeared to impair the immune system, especially in the elderly. This is a very important caveat to keep in mind, especially if yo have already been infected by COVI-19. Fasting should only be used a a preventative tool. 

Over the long term, intermittent fasting and refeeding will boost the immune system. Keep this in mind in preparation for the next pandemic. Sorry but yes, we will likely face other, more or less severe, pandemics in the coming years/decades. Better be safe than sorry.  However, during an acute pandemic, where the immediate risk of infection is higher than usual, it may not be a good time to try fasting, given the potential for a temporary decrease in immunity.

This may sound surprising for those who have heard the phrase, “starve a fever.” The theory is that humans have evolved to not feel hungry and purposely avoid food during an acute illness as a protective mechanism, which may in turn limit nutrients the virus needs to replicate. To be clear, this is all conjecture without any quality supporting evidence.

Other evidence suggests that ketones are beneficial for immune function, and perhaps that could be why some recommend fasting. But considering all of the data together, if that were the case, you are better off adopting a keto diet and not fasting. Based on the limited data available, I suggest not fasting longer than 36 hours during the outbreak of the coronavirus, especially if you are older than 60 years old. It’s logical that you can continue with shorter-duration time-restricted eating, although there is no data on this either.

There you go…my official guidelines on keeping a healthy diet in the face of coronavirus…

Coming up next: Why you cannot “catch” a virus

Until then…take care of you and your loved ones.

To Your Health

The Health Messenger