#i know im going to cry
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why am i re watching the c-word why am i re watching the c-word why am i re watching the c-word
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to moving forward
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#gojo satoru#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itadori yuuji#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#satoru gojo#jjk manga spoilers#hina.comic#before any1 says anything i KNOw his birthday is in december ik ik ik this is just 2 show some post-battle bonding after the trauma#its winter in canon n megumi's birthday has passed and he spent it being piloted like a mech so they need to celebrate Now!!#also this was technically a request lmao anon wanted megumi birthday angst hehehehhe i hope u like it <3 bc it KILLED ME DEAD#im going to collapse remember when i said this wasnt harder than the hydrangeas im having second thoughts#page 8 made me want to bash my head in#could have stuck with one flashback image could have left them monochrome could have done literally anything 2 ease the workload#but noooo the chronic overachiever in me would not allow it#rule of threes i had to include all of them and they Had to be in colour it wouldn't have hit the same if i had kept it monochrome#i needed it to look how childhood memories look i needed it to look oversaturated and hazy and fond but unmistakably Gone#it may have killed me but im so proud of this rn like from an art style perspective these megumis and yuujis r top tier by my standards#personal favourites r the first and last panel of crying megumi like not 2 pat myself on th back but expression?????? hello??????#enjoy your cake megumi you've earned it <333 sorry fr hurting ur feelings it will happen again#oh my god i can sleep tonight bless <333 and i met my 3 day deadline NICE im so good at what i do
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone#yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post.#writeblr#ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person#and on this blog we support workers.#at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going.#when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens#have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists#and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like.#it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases -#at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory.#it was what i had seen.#and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference#we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol'#so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender#and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID.#he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different#i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.
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thanks @chipper-smol for getting me ISAT i will be so irresponsible with the looping
#the real reason why you arent allowed to do this in game is because the dev knew we'd be nowhere close to finish it if we could#too much power and not enough responsibility etc etc. i dont even know if siffrin would want to stop looping once he figures out he can#do this. “stardust do you want to get out of the fucking loop or not stop smothering yourself on the fighters jugs” LMAOOO#i havent played it yet bc im gonna go in blind and stream it on call so 3 other ppl can watch me cry like a weenie in real time#my art#myart#in stars and time#isat#isat isabeau#isat siffrin#isabeau#siffrin#in stars and time fanart#isat fanart#isafrin#shitpost#i am. so fucking sorry
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I had a caption for this but I lost it oops
#dragon age 4#dragon age#datv#dragon age veilguard#art#fanart#emmrich volkarin#emmrich/rook#OC: Artemis#suggestive#kinda#I legit dont know since this is meant to be just fluff#anyway im gonna go cry now#Drawing Artemis with her LI behind her hits different#She doesnt trust anyone at her back since she considers it her most vulnerable spot#so this takes a lot of trust#Im ok#artys work#I hate how this looks really nice on my drawing screen but the colors are TOO vibrant on my main monitor...
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how can you look at me like that
#hhheyyyyy#bakudeku#bkdk#mha#bnha#bnha fanart#mha fanart#bkdk fanart#dkbk#dekubaku#ktdk#izkt#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#izuku midoriya#katsuki bakugo#katsudeku#izukatsu#kacchan#deku#my autism academia...#poof art#so do you guys know how ppl hc bkg having nightmares of izk jumping...#well here at poof autism headquarters we see the situation a bit differently#i think bkg has nightmares of going back and being his middle school bully self actually#he regrets it so much guys it consumes him. it poisons his interactions with izuku bc he thinks hes the worst person ever but izk#just smiles at him. like always. like its okay. like he should forgive himself too#this stupid fixation man im going to cry
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kevin getting angry at neil for not taking his health seriously and telling neil to run then promising to teach him every night and keeping neil's binder safe without looking what's in it and calling wymack to make sure neil is okay after winter break and offering to talk about riko if neil wanted to
#my posts#my aftg posts#aftg#kevin day#all for the game#tfc#the foxhole court#kevneil#we've talked about their relationship so much recently#but im in the middle of making anothre post#and i just remembered him calling wymack!!!!!! to check on neil!!!!!!!!!#and before that telling neil not to go bc he knows what riko will do to him#and 'jean will help you if you help him'#and oh my fucking god i am crying losing my mind dying#I LOVE HIM#I LOVE THEM
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Song - Feel Better by Penelope Scott
#Been thinking about this for a while and I finally did it!#Look at it!#Tbf this song also fits Flowey a LOT#But Chara lives in my brain. so#this is the first time ive done something like this i hope it's good#also if there's any better way to format posts like these tell me cause god knows i do Not know how to use this site#anyways i think about them a lot#im gonna go cry bye#undertale#chara#chara dreemurr#asriel#asriel dreemurr#lyric comic#my art
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Who's the "real" me?
+ some references for the Rise-related things I included <3
#im reaaaally happy with this one hehe i had fun putting the stuff from different things shes had/worn#i feel like ppl overlook the massive identity crisis & the accompanying depression & internal conflict rise is going through during the gam#like shes trying to figure out who she is seperate from her idol image (which she constantly still clings to despite her insistance that sh#s done with it bc she does still crave that recognition and attention she got from that position. she literally breaks down crying when her#manager tells her kanami has taken her acting role and is more-or-less set to take her spot now)#and then she also struggles with finding what she wants to do with herself now that she doesnt have showbiz to worry about#i think she kinda unintentionally uses the investigation as an anchor for her to hold onto#something to keep her busy in the absence of the hustling idol life#and then she also like. again she keeps clinging to the idol image and the associated bubbly-ness and bold flirtation#because thats the ''her'' ppl liked#i dont think the way she acts during the game is ENTIRELY an act theres definitely a lot of her true self in it too#but she does have a lot of moments where she leans more heavily into the bubbly & flirty cutie act#her sl shows that for all that she wanted to retire from showbiz she isnt really ready just yet#bc she did actually enjoy being an idol. she did enjoy being able to reach out to people in this way & to finally have ppl like & accept he#the problem is she doesnt know who ''she'' is at this point#im rambling but u get my point. yeah. yeah#rise..............#rise kujikawa#persona#persona 4#p4#art#my art#xanders art#digital art#fan art
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I AM SHITTJING MYSELF WHY DOES HE HAVE THE SPECIAL EDITION $1.5K VICTORIA’S SECRET RED SATIN PAJAMAS
#WAS THAT YOUR SECRET VICTORIA?????? PORT MAFIA EXECUTIVE CHUUYA NAKAHARA IS YOUR NUMBER ONE BUYER??😨😨😨#IM ACTUALLY CRYING WHY DIES IT LOOK SO SIMILAR IM LITETALLY GOING INSAEN#YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE WAS IN TGE FREQUENTLY BOUGHT TOGETHER????? A BLACK LACE THONG😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i know what you are……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….whore#anyway everyone say congrats pookie lotus for getting this card 🥰🥰🥰🥰#i was so excited when i saw this man in bed#IN THE SENSE THAT “oh look he’s finally getting rid of those horrendous eye bags by getting some well deserved rest🥰🥰🥰🥰”#idk what else anyone would be thinking ahahaha#bsd
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He's never hosted a meeting, ever. Why the change of heart?
#i still cant believe we got this scene#and few other similar ones#also the 'angel i know' ;-; im crying#good omens#goedit#goodomensedit#crowley#ineffable husbands#aziraphale x crowley#aziracrow#queer#lgbt#david tennant#nina sosanya#nina good omens#she was so real for asking the most important questiong aksdjsdj#mine#gif:good omens#good omens spoilers#go s2 spoilers#good omens 2#good omens s2 spoilers
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idk about yall but life is good again
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#HES SMILINIG MINUNGGJSGJVSFVSFJH#MY DARLING BOY MY SON WHOM I BIRTHED I LOVE YOU#fushiguro megumi the way i would kill/cry/die fr u ur smile cures depression waters crops etc etc#your zuko costumes pretty good but the scars on the wrong side...................#cant believe i lost the scar side coin flip smh leave it to me who does not know her lefts from her rights 2 predict the Wrong Side#sue me fr thinking yuuji lost an eye fr good n wanting them 2 have complementary injuries smh >:/#its ok im over it im over it im just so happy we got scarred!megu im so happy we got smiling!megu im so happy we got ALIVE MEGU#oh my god ive been up all night hand hurt hand ouch but its fr him its worth it i can keep going i can go all day if i need to#god its a good day 2 b a megumi stan
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NICKELODEON/BACKYARDIGANS OFFICIAL HIRE ME I CAN HELP YOU!!!!
#ive fixated on this show since i was a fetus do u know how surreal it is to see it go viral again over some shit like THIS#the backyardigans#backyardigans#also /pos im about to cry cause these are blowing up on twitter and i feel so validated#shumm's art#digital art#nick jr#noggin#2000s nostalgia#medibang paint pro#redesign#pablo backyardigans#tyrone backyardigans#uniqua backyardigans#tasha backyardigans#austin backyardigans#artists on tumblr#being simultaneously excited to get new content for the first time in like 14 years for it to look AI generated is crazy (im not ok)#i said it on twit but it feels like they generated a prompt. then paid an animator/artist/whatever to model and design said prompt.#it also sounds...really weird????? i cant tell if it's ai singing or real kids but. it's lowkey unsettling to me lol#anyways i snapped on everyone esp austin#HIRE ME FOR A REBOOT HIRE ME FOR A REBOOT HIRE ME FOR A REBOOT
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i need help with vet bills (again).
hi. for those of you who remember, earlier this year i asked for donations to help me afford toos' vet bills, who we found out through your help had kidney failure, and again with your help we got her on medication for it. unfortunately it wasn't enough, and we lost her. and then shortly after, dexter began deteriorating, which we put down to his grief of losing toos - she kept him young, he followed her everywhere, he only played because of her, he only ate when she ate, etc. without her he just stopped. and then he started to have seizures and fits daily. we got him blood tests, but he was suffering so badly. we made the decision to put him down. i didn't ask for donations this time, because i was so deeply embarrassed to ask for help again. but we are still recovering financially from that, as well as the parts of toos bills that didn't get covered from donations. my mother hasn't worked for a very long time, she's disabled and very sick, and she receives PIP from the government that only covers her monthly medications that are not covered by the NHS. my father retired early to become her full time carer, and we are living off his pension. i am too disabled to work, but because my mother already receives PIP and i live with them, the government are resistent to giving me any help - so i have zero income, and rely entirely on my parents.
this is jenny. she's a 14 year old cairn terrier, who loves when we garden because she wants to help dig holes. she helped us bury dexter and toos, digging their graves for them with my dads help. she's an angel, and loves people so much she likes to escape under the fence and join other families for awhile. one time she got into someones back garden and asked to come in as they were eating lunch. she really hates flies, and will try to bite them out of the air (she has never succeeded but i believe she will one day). she will rub her face against you until you start stroking her, and will growl and even bark if you stop! we don't have the money to take jenny to the vets, for a checkup or for anything they may want to do. this has been an ongoing issue, but toos and dexter took priority, and it hasn't been a bother to her. she existed as normal for a long time, but that's since changed.
jenny has this lump in her mouth, it is larger than the picture shows, but she is a nightmare to force open her mouth since this got so big, i think it's uncomfortable or painful for her. she can't properly close her lips now, and it has pushed all her front teeth away, misshaping her mouth, and sometimes it bleeds profusely. eating has become difficult for her, she can't eat anything hard, and currently will only eat soft human foods like rice, scrambled egg chopped up so small she doesn't have to chew, and things like soups and gravy. she's lost a lot of weight, and i'm getting frightened. to add onto it, i've found lumps like this across her body. i've done as much research as i can, and i believe it to be an oral tumor, it fits, and it looks right, and it spreading across her body is called 'full staging'. and going by all i've read - they will want to remove them in surgery. according to my research, this will cost anywhere from £585 - £4,740 for just the lump in her mouth. that's not including any checkup/test costs, or the other lumps on her body.
she hasn't been to the vet yet, i don't have any secure goal or bills to share, just my assumptions and beliefs from researching myself online. my parents refuse to take her because we can't afford it. i want to save up money, have it in my bank, and show them that we can help her now, before it gets worse, or it's too late. as i said before, i don't have any income, so the only way i can do this is with help.
here's a link to my paypal.me
the icon is a little mouse, and the @ is rivellon
i struggled so badly posting the first post like this for toos. i felt so guilty and embarrassed and ashamed. but i have no choice again, i want to help jenny. i don't want her to suffer. and selfishly, i can't handle losing another dog so soon. this year has been waking nightmare, and i need your help to stop it getting even worse.
please reblog and share, even if you can't donate.
thank you for reading.
#animal illness#animal sickness#pet illness#pet sickness#vet bills#vet help#i don't really know what to tag this as. i don't remember what i did before#and i don't want to go look for my toos post because it will hurt so bad to see it i think#im on hiatus because i cant deal with this and be here right now. but im gonna queue/schedule this a bit i think#im sorry for asking for help again. but please consider helping jenny. she's so lovely#and she's keeping me alive right now#losing toos and dexter ripped me to shreds and shes the only reason i havent completely broken down#i am absolutely terrified of what will happen if we lose her too#god i feel so fucking guilty. i can't stop fucking crying. i hate this so much#im so sorry guys. please reblog and consider donating even a tiny amount#tiny amounts add up yknow#anyway . i should post this now instead of hiding in the tags
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can't trust the words behind the fangs 🐍🎭 a doodle with my take on his mask :3c
#sampo koski#sampo#honkai star rail#hsr fanart#hsr#hsr sampo#eats him like a starved man#the snake fangs and the poison drips ugh pls i love idsgjfdhkjdg#its unfinished in so many places but idc anymore TAKE HE#WOE SAMPO UPON YE IM TIRED#he's probably going to have like a full face mask but the half mask is nice#like u can still see his mouth but you cant trust what he says#and then his eyes are covered in that forever laugh giggle eye expression#the poison drips and gems from his fangs and tears#laughing? crying? who knows!#im kissing and punching him violently#schedules this at 2am eodfhkjdhjdhgkfh
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you know how in 5.13 arthurs like “i tried to take your head off with a mace” and merlins like “and i stopped you, using magic” and arthurs immediate reply to that is “you cheated” … and i guess i was just thinking about the breathy little laugh merlin lets out in response to that. bc like i just noticed how maybe it was a little bit of relief and awe. because like. he just talked to arthur. about magic. about using magic From The Beginning. against him in a fight. and arthurs immediate response, his most natural reaction to that, was to comment on merlins poor sportsmanship. out of anything he couldve said something about. the first thing that came to mind was merlin not playing fair. which. idk. IDK!!!
#like he barely even cared about the magic at that point TBH!!!!#what the hell was the crime of magic compared to not knowing his best friend bc he didnt trust him!!!!#whatd arthur care about magic then other than to keep up appearances!!!!#LIKE I JUST WATCHED THAT SCENE AND MERLINS LITTLE LAUGH MADE ME CRY#its entirely possible im going insane from too many blorbos in my head#bbc merlin#merthur#5.13
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