#i know YOU want to hear

[ninyard]

whenever you have a moment for some oc yappery i'd love to hear more abt Paris

you asked for it here's paris (ilovehimilovehimilovehim)

-- paris antonis

-- 25

-- backliner on the same team as lilya, also hoping to get signed for the us court but keeps getting that disappointing phone call that says not this year

— transferred from edgar allan to usc after his first year

Paris. 6'2, he's got big arms and a bigger heart. his hair is buzzed, he has more tattoos than he can count, and always has something in his anxious hands. he’s a seriously empathetic person - if you’re upset, there’s a good chance he’ll end up crying with you. he’s sensitive, a little bit paranoid, and he probably doesn’t trust you.

Paris was scouted for the Ravens from his high school team - he played exy from pretty much the time he could walk. star player, captain of the team, with his recognisable smile and even more recognisable laugh, he was offered a position on the raven lineup, and of COURSE he was going to take it. his wardrobe got darker, more and more people clapping hands on his back saying congratulations, man. they’re the best of the best. you’ll fit right in.

he remembers clearly the last time he saw most people from his hometown - his best friend clare, who pulled at the collar of his black tshirt and asked if this was the new normal. his coach, who shook his hand and wished him luck, not after showing him the picture of him they were printing out to put in the halls of his high school. his little brother jonas, who made him promise to call. who made him promise to send letters and postcards. his older sister sasha, who promised him she’d watch every game. his mom who cried as she watched him leave. his dad who finally told him he was proud of him.

the last time paris smiled in edgar allan was in the minutes where he waited to be escorted to the nest by a raven. paris stood up to shake the girls hand, who only looked at his outstretched palm and told him to follow her.

the next few months were the worst months of his life. he met lilya, who seemed to fit in already, even though she arrived the day before he did. they were partners from the beginning. paris learned the rules of the nest very quickly, and very painfully.

he cried for his mom at the end of his first week. he stopped crying after a month.

there was not a part of him that didn’t change. he became a robot, a shell of himself, a machine that only cared about exy, that lived and breathed edgar allan. happy, smiley paris became this shadow of himself. he forgets what his own voice sounds like when he’s not scared, or tired. he wakes up afraid most of the time.

paris has a scar on his bicep that stretches from just below his arm pit to just above his elbow from some hazing ritual in his second month in EAU. he’s really self conscious about it, because it healed in a messy jagged line - every time he thought it had healed he’d be back on the court and it’d just split back open again. it was the first thing he covered up when he started getting tattoos the summer that he left the nest.

his story goes a little like this then, afterwards; he called his mom the night that he left. while he took a cab as far away as he could, she bought him a plane ticket home.

he didn’t last long back in his hometown.

he couldn’t speak to his family, their pleas for him to talk to them quietly ignored with a shake of his head. his dad noticed the scar across his cheek first, from Paris’ first fight, and his sister was the first to see the awful scar on the back of his calf from where a helmet had been thrown at him and broken skin so badly it needed stitches. his little brother touched the scar on his arm and asked what happened. Paris bought his ticket to California that night, when he’d only been home for a week.

he realised something about himself had well and truly fundamentally changed when he smiled a couple of months into training and adjusting to life at usc; he was having lunch with his teammates, and a joke was said, and he smiled. unintentional, but newly unnatural. a first year goalkeeper nudged him and said, “i think that’s the first time i’ve seen a real smile on your face you since you got here.”

popular, happy, sportsmanship awarding winning Paris, Paris with the pretty smile, Paris with the laugh that you’d recognise from a mile away. Paris who graduated high school as the most likely to become a comedian, most likely to make you laugh, his peers parents’ favourite friend. clare used to tell him off for making her smile when she was down - now? now his own smile no longer reached his eyes, the impulse to laugh buried beneath a single year worth of beatings and suppression. now his teammates were only noticing his first smile, three months into his time at USC.

Paris is paranoid, Paris has to read over documents a hundred times to make sure the terms are okay, Paris doesn’t trust people anymore. he used to be known for being that guy who would tell his friends to give someone the benefit of the doubt, to give someone a chance, to not judge a book by its cover. now he feels like he's skeptical of everyone he meets.

he’s afraid of someone knowing his secrets, he’s afraid of spilling secrets. he never got back into contact with his family once he left for california, except for the odd “im alive” text he sends to his sister once every couple of months. maybe sometime in the future, when he feels like himself again, he'd reach out and make amends, but he can’t let them see him like this. he can’t bear to have his mother look at him the way she did when he first came home. like she doesn’t recognise her own son anymore, like she’s raised this sweet boy and he’s turned himself into a soulless monster.

Paris doesn’t really label his sexuality, but he feels like queer fits him best.

things change for him eventually. he starts to feel like himself again. he smiles more, letting people in, and sometime by the end of his third year he’s heard his true laugh again. it takes him a long time to heal from that year in Edgar Allan, but it’s a slow and painful process, and a very lonely one. but he gets there eventually, with people by his side pushing him forward every step of the way.

there's some more stuff about paris here and here and under my ocs tag but if i dont stop i'll just keep talking about him forever <3

[millificent]

Every Nico Di Angelo fan focusing more on the background of the episode than the actual plot

[what-am-i-doing-in-this-fandom]

Yeah, I don't know about you, Fidds, but I'd fold at this 🙏

Previous!!

Next!!

First!!

[garbagequeer]

hilarious man (The National Play “Sorrow” for Six Hours at MoMA PS1)

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC Al Ghul Twins Quick Thought

Jason, visiting the manor the first time after Damian showed up: *does a double take* Where's the second one?

Damian, stopping in his tracks and looking him dead in the eye: Dead.

Jason, rolling his eyes but dropping the subject: Alright.

The entire Batfam:

[mythicalcoolkid]

You don't wish your disability was worse or more visible, you wish your disability was taken seriously. Please stop confusing the two, I guarantee you would not get the support you need JUST by being more severe or more visible. Please listen to visibly disabled people when we tell you it isn't better on our side

[technically-human]

Part two of the reverse verse is here! The reverse boys meet the original boys. They're not really getting along as well as I had hoped...

Again, this was a commission for @i-am-as-normal-as-you-are and they asked for angst/funny vibes... I think it's mostly just angst though. Oh, well...

Part one

[nothing-an-iratze-cant-fix]

I’m curious - people always seem surprised that multiple siblings are queer, as if it’s amazing the gay lightning struck twice so close together.

But human variation is down to our genes and external factors. Siblings are logically more likely to both/all be queer than not.

So a wee poll if you don’t mind!

Anyone can take part, there should be an option for anyone but please let me know in notes if I missed anyone.

For reference: queer is anyone who wouldn’t describe themselves as heterosexual or cis-gendered or allo-sexual. Anyone we would include in the queer group. And if you’re not including people by their own identification, we can have words after…

Notes:

If you only have one sibling use the relevant all option.

If you have an issue with the word queer I truly don’t want to hear about it - that’s your choice, this is mine.

Reblog if you fancy! If you don’t then no worries, but if you can it would be nice to get a lot of replies!

And hey everyone, happy Pride!

[arsenicflame]

Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?

[ohrackham]

It is not what you do for me that makes me love you. It's your kindness. Your empathy. How much you care. Just being you is enough, Colin. I do not need you to save me. I just need you to stand by me. To hold me. To kiss me.

[lotus-pear]

god i love skk sm i wish gay ppl were real :(

[featheredadora]

[xxplastic-cubexx]

oh boy 2AM !!!!!!

[what-am-i-doing-in-this-fandom]

Fic Idea where Fiddleford helps Stan rebuild the portal, but Stan finds out that Fiddleford has a wife and he's like

"You have a WIFE?? That DIDN'T marry you to steal your car and money???? What are you DOING here???"

"Yeah, well.... She's better off thinking I'm dead somewhere....."

"A WIFE. That LOVES you. Get outta here and go explain yourself, Idiot!!"

"She and our son shouldn't have to deal with--"

"YOUR SON???!!?!!??"

Anyways, so Stan helps Fiddleford reach out and explain himself to his wife, but expresses that he wants to keep being in Gravity Falls, so his wife and kid go to live with them in The Shack instead.

Blah blah blah, bonding happens, Stan bags Fiddleford AND his wife and becomes a step dad, God bless 🙏

[shibaraki]

please write your reader insert however you want to. unabashedly!! write fat reader. black reader. asexual. masculine. tall. trans. disabled. you’re allowed to see yourself reflected in these spaces!!! sometimes your fic won’t be for everyone—it will be for all the people who look, think, love and experience life the way you do and that’s ok! it’s wonderful, actually.

it is not your job to make sure the shoe comfortably fits every single person out there. your only job is to tag it, and if anyone tells you otherwise I’ll personally come out swinging lol

[trans-axolotl]

my gendered experience growing up as an intersex person was overwhelmingly defined by my responses and resistance to everything that got me labeled as a failure: failure to quickly get a gender assigned at birth, failure to go through a normal puberty and grow up into a woman, failure at meeting the standards for "complete womanhood" because of my intersex sex traits, and yet simultaneously failing to ever be acknowledged as a "real man" and being treated as a threat when I expressed I wanted to transition.

before i realized i was a man and came out as trans, the ways that girlhood was denied to me was very often humiliating and painful. locker rooms filled with other girls were a frequent source of shame. there were many big and small ways that i was told that my intersex body made me insufficient, incomplete, broken. i was forced onto estrogen, forced into shaving my body hair, and was constantly being told to change myself to better fit this mystical idea of a "normal woman." and even though I ultimately ended up becoming a man, the denial of girlhood was painful.

but i think that these things would have been even more difficult to navigate as an intersex girl if on top of everything I already said, i was having to cope with the denial of my girlhood while i was forced into boys locker rooms. if my doctors were forcing me onto testosterone hrt and refusing to even discuss estrogen, if all my legal paperwork had "M" on it and was a logistical nightmare to change, if every support group for my intersex variation labeled it as a "men's support group," if the LGBTQ community spaces i tried to join were misogynistic towards me often to the point of exile, if my self determination as an intersex girl was denied in most spaces of my life, and on and on and on. while listing all these things out i also don't want to make it seem like it's all about suffering and pain--so much of transition for me has been about joy in my self determination and how much it feels like a reclamation of autonomy to decide what I want my body and self to be like--i know this is an experience i share with so many of my trans intersex friends.

as an person who was AFAB, although there were many ways that trying to grow up as an intersex girl were a painful, logistical nightmare, many times and places that i was excluded from woman's spaces, etc. however, there was a simultaneous affirmation that i was right to strive for that in the first place. which is logic rooted in some fucked up compulsory dyadism, but also which would have made some things slightly easier or even possible at all if i had wanted to embrace being an intersex girl within this fucked up system.

pretty much every time i've seen people on tumblr talking about "afab transfems" in an intersex context, people seem happy to collapse these experiences and act like there's no meaningful distinction or point in distinguishing between different types of intersex embodiment. it seems incredibly extractive, to be perfectly honest with you--taking terms already used by a community to make meaning of their experiences and to expand and dilute that term enough that it means something pretty different than the original.

it's making me think about the concept of epistemic injustice, which is a term coined by Miranda Fricker to describe oppression related to knowledge, communication, and making meaning of the world. There's two subtypes of epistemic injustice: testimonial injustice and hermeneutical injustice. Testimonial injustice refers to the dynamic where marginalized people are labeled as not credible, excluded from conversations, and their testimony and knowledge is labeled as unreliable, even when they're the ones who are experts and have first hand experience of what people are talking about. (this is why i probably won't make this post rebloggable--i've noticed this pattern on tumblr many times where trans men speaking about transmisogyny get lots of notes and are given a lot of grace, where trans women are silenced, attacked for not having perfect wording, and otherwise delegitimized.)

the second type is called hermeneutical injustice. it describes how marginalized people are denied the right to make sense of the experiences in their own lives. this can look like preventing people from building community, terminology, a political understanding of themselves, and the interpretive resources needed to process how you live in the world.

this is a form of injustice that I think almost all intersex people are very familiar with--we are denied community and interpretive resources to the point that we're told we don't even exist, that intersex isn't a real word, and so many more examples that leave us isolated and with very few options for understanding what we're collectively experiencing. as an intersex person i really intimately understand how frustrating, confusing, and painful it is to not have words for your experiences, your identity, your life.

so it makes me really sad and pissed off when it seems like intersex people seem to be replicating this exact same type of epistemic injustice towards transfems and specifically towards intersex transfems. pretty much every time recently i see people talking about "afab transfems" they're doing so in a way that seems to deny that trans women even have the right to make sense of their own experiences in the world. there seems to be this mindset that these political frameworks, these interpretive resources that transfems have built up are just up for grabs for anyone. and then on top of that has come with it a lot of cruel, hateful language and direct attacks towards many intersex transfems who are facing so much harassment right now.

an important value to me is this idea of reciprocity as a foundation for solidarity. to me reciprocity means that we're prioritizing the ways we care for each other, we're thinking about how we can uplift each other, and we're watching out for extractive or exploitative patterns where one group is constantly expected to be in "solidarity" with another group without getting the same respect and care back toward them. i think that there could be so many ways that intersex people of all genders could share our overlapping experiences and actually be in true, meaningful solidarity with each other, but i barely ever actually see that happen on tumblr. and that pisses me off, because i do think that there's so much we have in common that we could celebrate and support each other with. i feel so much kinship with so, so many of my trans intersex friends, and ways where i see our lives converge. but i don't think that can happen in an environment where there's no acknowledgment of the ways that our experiences will sometimes (often) differ from each other, and the ways that we have unique needs.

another frustration i've had based on this most recent couple months of transmisogynistic intersex posting on tumblr is how intersex people have been mostly ignoring intersex community resources and devaluing the existing intersex terminology that people created to try to meet our needs. so much of what i've seen people describing on tumblr seems to really line up with the term ipsogender. Ipsogender is a term coined by an intersex sociologist Cary Gabriel Costello, and is used to describe intersex people whose gender matches the gender they were medically assigned at birth, but who might not feel like cis or trans fits them, might experience dysphoria, and who might feel like they've ended up transitioning medically or socially in some ways. this is a word that exists that an intersex person put time into coining because they wanted other intersex people to feel seen, embraced, and have ways of understanding themselves and communicating to others, and that's something that's super meaningful to me! and yet, i've rarely seen anyone reference it, and also seen multiple people making fun of it in other spaces online.

there's also intergender, which is another intersex specific gender term used to describe when your gender is inseparable from your intersex traits, and that your intersex identity is intertwined with your gender identity in some way. some people just identify as intergender, others use it as an adjective and exist as an intergender man or woman. intersex terminology like this is really important to me, especially because we're so often denied the right to make sense of our own experiences.

i think ultimately what i wanted to say with this post is just that when i think about intersex community, some of the most important values of intersex community for me are solidarity, care for each other, and affirming our right to define our own existence. and i don't think that can happen in a community where people are acting in extractive ways, harassing and attacking their fellow community members, and being dismissive of the realities of other intersex people's lives.