#i kind of want to write an essay about it all
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I could literally write an essay on all the things that led to me ultimately walking away from this friendship but it would be impossible to list it all. It was a decision that was a long time coming but was difficult to end because there’s no right way to end things unfortunately when you just simply come to terms with the fact that you don’t want to continue a friendship anymore. The harsh realization that you would not be friends with this kind of person if you were able to make the choice fresh today. Ultimately it took time alone to reflect, growing and healing myself to realize that feeling drained and negative after you are around someone you consider a best friend for years isn’t normal. I have had many close friendships with women throughout my life and nothing came close to how this one made me feel. She tried to appear like a positive person but she held a lot of negativity inside and as someone who was close to her for a long time it was very visible. I was just young and naive at the time the friendship started (she literally told me she initially didn’t like me before I even knew her or we had properly ever interacted lmao, red flag from the beginning) so after that when SHE extended starting a friendship with me for some reason I chose to be friends with someone who held many very visible toxic behaviours that I usually steer far away from. Immaturity, passive aggressiveness (this was so acknowledged as a part of her personality it was something constantly joked about in our friend group) pettiness, being judgemental (although always claiming she wasn’t but tbh I don’t think she realized she wasn’t good at hiding it at all), subtle digs, being condescending, crazyyy internalized misogyny, secret competition etc. Literally remember her telling me she prefers being friends with guys to girls at our big age and me sitting explaining why that’s not okay. Her not having any other close best friends who are women in the 10 years I knew her. I hope she genuinely thinks about why that is. So many examples I can remember of her just randomly disliking so many girls we knew and when I would ask why she’d say “she could just tell the vibes were off”. Honestly had never met anyone like that before and thank god have never since. Anybody else who knew the feeling of being her friend would have walked away sooner. The best way to describe it was uncomfortable. Always calculating, holding back, made me so uneasy. I never had the relaxed feeling around her that I had with other friends. With my other friends I always feel like both our walls are down. But with her it felt one sided always and I remember telling her this too. So many moments I look back on and realized were not okay but I just let slide. I regret not calling it out and but I honestly didn’t understand it and tried to see the good overall. These last few years I started really coming to terms with all of this, it’s like I always felt unhappy but never verbalized it. There was some good in there, which made it confusing, but ultimately it was largely overshadowed by all of the above. She would always tell me she felt lighter after hanging out with me and that was most often not the case with me. In fact it was the opposite, I would feel heavy. Ultimately I realized a lot of her negativity and pettiness rubbed off on me. Hence why I am blogging about this which is very out of character for me. The damage is done after associating with this behaviour for so long I have absorbed a lot of it. Hence why I finally decided to distance myself and then everything hit the fan. But honestly what ended up happening was just the catalyst I needed to finally walk away. Everything happens for a reason and definitely lessons learned. Trust your gut.

—Virginia Woolf
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between the lines
a very inconvenient discovery
You don’t realize what you’ve done until you’re halfway through your second class of the day and open your notebook to find...
Not your handwriting.
Not your diagrams. Not your very specific color-coding system. And certainly not your very dramatic drawing of Professor Binns mid-lecture, labeled “Sir Snooze-a-Lot.”
You stare at the page. Then flip. And flip again.
Oh no.
You’ve taken someone else’s notebook.
You never make mistakes like this. Your entire personality is built around being the girl who does not make mistakes like this. The girl who labels her tab dividers and rewrites her notes in neat, margin-aligned bullet points.
And now you’ve accidentally stolen someone’s entire academic life.
You're about to panic when a small ink blot in the corner of a page catches your eye.
It’s not a blot. It’s… a doodle?
Of a plant. One you recognize from Herbology drawn with an almost obsessive attention to detail, like someone who secretly loves the subject but doesn’t want anyone to know. Cute. Kind of nerdy.
You flip again.
Another page. Another harmless doodle.
You squint. There’s writing next to it, a scrawled little annotation that reads: cold in the library again. she never brings a jumper.
Your stomach does something weird.
You turn the page one more time.
It’s a sketch of… you.
It’s not a masterpiece or anything, but you recognize yourself immediately: the curve of your cheek, the way your quill rests against your lower lip when you’re thinking. There’s a tiny label under it, scribbled like an afterthought:
"Library girl."
You slam the notebook shut, face hot.
Okay. So.
You’ve just accidentally discovered that someone, an anonymous, emotionally repressed someone, has not only been sketching you in their notes… they’ve noticed things. Like the fact that you’re always cold in the library. Like the way you sit. The way you—
Oh Merlin.
Who does this belong to??
You think back to that morning. The rush of class. The pile of identical-looking notebooks on the desk in the library.
There’s only one other person who sits near you there. Always. Like clockwork. Never speaks. Just reads quietly in his perfect posture and his perfect jumper and his perfect bloody bone structure.
Theodore Nott.
You nearly fall off your chair.
Because if this notebook is his...
You look down at the cover. Nothing. Not a single identifying mark.
Of course. He would be mysterious about it.
You spend the next three hours spiraling.
Maybe, hopefully, it wasn't Theodore Nott’s? What if it is his and he finds out you saw and... Oh no.
He’s going to hex you.
You clutch the notebook like it’s about to self-destruct. You need to return it. Quietly. Discreetly. With as little eye contact as possible. Preferably while pretending you’ve seen nothing at all. Unfortunately, fate (and Theo Nott) are not that kind.
Later that evening. The library.
You slip into your usual spot and there he is.
Seated across from you like always, looking calm and composed and terrifyingly unreadable. His hair is a little messy, like he’s been running a hand through it, and his tie is slightly askew in a way that shouldn’t be attractive but absolutely is.
Your eyes meet.
Something flickers in his.
He looks down at the desk in front of him… where he has your notebook. Oh no. He knows.
You hold his notebook out toward him like a peace offering, trying not to die on the spot. “I, um— We switched. Earlier. I think.”
He doesn’t say anything right away. Just takes the notebook from your hands and flips it open. Your face burns in mounting horror as you take your own notebook back and see that he dog-eared a page where your very detailed to-do list included:
Finish Transfig essay
Ask Theo Nott what his problem is
(or if he just hates me personally???)
(he’s hot tho. unfortunately.)
“You read it,” he says, voice low and maddeningly calm, snapping you back from your brief paralyzation of horror.
“Did not,” you lie immediately.
One of his brows lifts.
Your face burns. “Okay, maybe a little. But like... casually.”
He leans back in his chair, studying you. “You read this casually? Was it a casual read for you?”
You fidget. “I didn’t mean to.”
There’s a long, awful pause. Then, softly and unexpectedly, he says, “I thought you’d be mad.”
You blink.
“What?”
“I thought… you’d be freaked out.” He taps a finger lightly against the edge of the notebook. “That I drew you. That I notice things.”
You stare at him.
“Theo,” you say, voice too high. “You drew me like a Victorian botanist in love. I’m not freaked out. I’m flattered.”
He gives a quiet huff of laughter, then looks down, shy, almost. It's disarming. You reach for your own notebook again, flipping it open and finding a new note on the inside cover. In that familiar sharp script:
“You looked cold. I’ll bring a jumper next time.”
You glance up.
He’s already pulling off his jumper and sliding it across the table to you.
#theodore nott#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott fluff#theodore nott one shot#theodore nott x you#theodore nott imagine#slytherin boys
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One day i might write an essay about how intellectualized ignorance is the ultimate form of wealth, that is if no one's done it before me yet. For all the sht-talking i see from college grads about the dumb and uneducated working class, they are not immune themselves to misinformation, propaganda and ignorance, with them it just takes a different form. It's the luxury of entertaining obviously bad and destructive ideas. Only someone sheltered enough to never experience a crime would ever entertain the idea of anarchism, only someone who's lived a safe life in a western country can plead for the case of terrorist groups. Mostly someone who never had to work for what they own can like the idea of communism and collective ownership lmao. People in safe gated communities and college dorms are the only ones I see wanting to defund the police. It's the luxury of flirting with chaos and misery you'll never have to experience, people less advantaged can never do this because it might actually have them killed. It's just as ignorant and ill informed as the people they look down on, it's just wrapped in an elite college bow. It's the ultimate luxury because you can never commercialize it. I'm obviously simplyfying it to make the point, however I still think it rings true.
I think you should write that essay.
If I'm understanding you, this is your argument:
Campus Hamasniks (both students and faculty) seem to believe that their elite education makes them immune to propoganda, but a degree doesn't make you immune to bad ideas - it just changes how such bad ideas show up and propogate
The crowds on college campuses call themselves "pro-Palestinian"...then openly praise Hamas and Hezbollah.
That's not solidarity-it's performative radicalism from people who've never once lived under rocket fire or authoritarian rule.
It's easy to chant slogans (which you don't understand) when you've got campus security, tenured professors, and administrators protecting your "resistance" from any consequences. It's a lot harder when you're actually living in Gaza or southern Israel, where both Palestinians and Israelis die because of groups like Hamas.
The vast majority of the campus Hamasniks have never lived in a war zone, never seen what it means when terrorist groups hold political power, never seen what happens when radical leftists take power. They talk about "decolonization" like it's a clever academic concept, when it's been dishonestly used against indigenous people to justify murder - and they do this from elite institutions where annual tuition costs more than most people earn in a year.
That's the luxury: being able to romanticize violence you'll never face, glorify chaos that never touches your sheltered little life of priviledge where you can afford your performative "activism."
This kind of ignorance isn't less harmful than the stuff the same people (rightly) mock in MAGA folks - it's just more polished, more accepted in elite circles. Underneath the theory and hashtags, though, it's the same disconnect from reality...and only made possible by extraordinary priviledge.
Yeah, Anon. You should write that. I'd read it.
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I think the first main reason why all these cool things are presented as "actually this would suck ass" is because stories are driven by conflict. If you write a story about how a thing is great and it makes life perfect and no one is unhappy, this is not a story, it's a worldbuilding essay.
But the second reason is... actually these things would suck ass. Unless presented with moderation. Like immortality sounds cool until you think about the heat death of the universe. But would it rule to live like 300, 400 years, maybe 1000? Yeah, absolutely... with caveats, most of which you can get around if there is a cohort of fellow immortals.
Knowing the future accurately implies it cannot be changed. So, you can get rich by playing the stock market, but imagine you foresee the death of a loved one and you cannot change it. If you wanna go in a different direction -- "I see the stochastic cloud of the most likely possible futures and I can change those possibilities" -- it'd be stressful as fuck but in an awesome way. Like, omg I have so much power to change the world and make it a better place, do I really have the right to take a day off and go to the beach?
Getting everything you want -- this absolutely depends on who you are and what you want. Because for one individual, alone of all individuals, getting everything you want when no one else gets what they want any more often than normal leads to either enormous empathic stress (which you did not want), or demonstrating that you're a sociopath who doesn't care that other people are in pain. So, solve the problem by saying everyone gets what they want! Except what some people want is power and status that's greater than other people. In the world where everyone gets what they want, those people can't get what they want, so they're gonna try to fuck it up for everyone else, thus preventing everyone from getting what they want. It doesn't solve the problem to say "this is the post-scarcity transhumanist eschaton" because there will still be people who want power over other people, because that's how we evolved, and if you take that away, we're... kinda not human enough to relate to anymore. So if you want to write the story of one person who gets everything they want and what they want is a nice relaxing life in a world where people who don't want to dominate others always get what they want... you can do that. It's probably a boring story though.
Also, still on the topic of getting everything you want. People who are starving want food. Give them food and shelter and safety, they start wanting good jobs, personal fulfillment, romantic and platonic relationships. Give them those, they start wanting luxury goods. Give them those, they start wanting extreme experiences that most people don't want and can't have. Give them those and they start suffering from ennui. It seems to be part of the human condition that if you get everything you want without fighting for it, it ends up boring the shit out of you, because it becomes your baseline and then there is something further that you want, and if you've actually gotten everything a person can have, and there's nothing left to want... people get bored with life. Rich people suffer from this all the time, it's why they do drugs. So the perfect spot on the bell curve is probably "you have all basic material needs met, you spend most of your time doing things you enjoy, and you still have to work hard to get things that are really awesome." Not necessarily in the sense of work hard at a job to make money, but, like... if I want to win a Nebula Award I have to work hard at my writing. If I want a friendship with someone I don't know who I admire, I have to work hard at getting to know them without coming across as a creeper.
Finally, time travel. As others have said: what kind of time travel? - We can go interact with the past but we can't change anything - We can jump backwards in our own lives with the knowledge we have today, but we can't bring with us any physical objects - We can change things in the past, but that runs the risk of damaging our present - We can change things in the past, but all it does is split off an alternate timeline, so effectively, no, we can't change anything
All of these come with substantial downsides. They are mostly all more awesome than "no time travel at all" but changing things in the past and destroying the present is terrifying even if you remove the possibility of paradox somehow. And that's the only one where you get to go back in time and assassinate Hitler, or reveal the details of Ronald Reagan's dirty dealing on national TV before the election to give Carter a chance, or prevent the death of your friend who was killed in a car accident, and then come back to the future and get to live in the new world you made. The others are all either "you can't change the past at all" or "you can change the past but only within your lifetime and you have to live through the past again in order to do it".
So, I mean... there are reasons these specific things are presented as "this sounds cool but actually there are reasons why it would be awful", and that's because these things that sound cool all come with huge predictable downsides. Could you write a story where people are happy anyway despite the downsides? Sure, and many have. But you really can't present any of this as "this is unilaterally wonderful and everyone who has it has a great life", because it's kind of obviously not true.
"what if this thing that sounds good but is impossible was actually bad and sucked" is an unsurprisingly common genre of thing.
Like "oh immortality is bad actually, oh time travel is bad actually, oh knowing the future accurately is bad actually, oh getting what you want all the time forever is bad actually"
no they'd all be super cool and awesome. This is an act of self-delusion to protect you from the horrors of reality not having those things accessible because they'd be really cool.
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WHEN ANIMALS DREAM (2014) dir. Jonas Alexander Arnby & RAW (2016) dir. Julia Ducournau
#i had a feeling these movies would be “cousins” but i'm shocked with how much they actually match#even the poster quotes????? LIKE#“the truth is known to all but one” is so Justine with her family#and “what are you hungry for?” is SO Marie through her arc#her arcs are kind of the same too although the girls are not that alike#i kind of want to write an essay about it all#when animals dream#2014#når dyrene drømmer#jonas alexander arnby#sonia suhl#danish movie#danish film#raw#raw 2016#grave#grave 2016#julia ducournau#garance marillier#french movie#french film#horror movies#horror film#bloody women
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I think the other thing i love about Conclave is some of my favorite poets and writers are queer people who are/have been profoundly devoutly religious like the moment i found out benjamin alire sáenz went to monastery and was on track to becoming a priest before becoming a writer I was just like "Aha! That's what it fucking was, that's where this philosophical torturous burden and deep empathy for others I'm feeling from your work comes from" deeply intellectually curious devout clergymen are such interesting people, its delicious, you cant get that shit from anywhere else
#or like james baldwin#they always have some kind of deal like truly never not fascinating#and then there is also the connection between one's craft being linked to godliness and needing things to be extremely well made#the devotion to extremely well constructed custom garments and pressed linens and food and ink and wax seals and painstaking paintings#gay af honestly - the catholic OBSESSION with aesthetics and creation and suffering for art#makes me want to write an essay on this movie#also wonder how this would feel if i wasnt catholic and didnt speak a romance language which meant i didnt need subtitles at all#like what if i didnt know the sins or the papal selection process or about the flame/smoke#conclave 2024#conclave
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yingdu episode 5 spoilers
ohhh my god this is everything I want from cheng xiaoshi. yes. perfect. sorry, but I'm a cheng xiaoshi whump liker and link click always brings out the best of them in episode 5 of each season.
there's just something cathartic about how when cheng xiaoshi becomes an emotional mess, it's also when he's most disconnected with the people he knows (physically, as he's diving in a photo and his only link to his home timeframe is a disembodied lu guang in his head) but it's also when he's most connected with strangers (when their own personal trauma lines up with his). to me, it's a showcase of empathy and a strange manifestation of his own agency. something about how the disconnect gives him the space to blow up, and the connection heightens it and grants him permission, almost, to express his anger more freely for his own sake and for another person's behalf.
like. listen, okay, I'm gonna ramble now because cheng xiaoshi is my favorite character in this entire show, but listen. sometimes some fans will conflate adjectives to his character that are usually associated with his character archetype, but they aren't necessarily true about him as a character. and I don't mean it in a, "he's not like that because he grows out of those traits" kind of way. I mean it in a, "he was never like that" kind of way.
one of those adjectives, for me, is when people call him immature. he isn't! to me! imo! he's got big emotions, yes, but I personally don't think the presence of big emotions indicates anything about maturity. because you know what? as long as his primary trauma (feelings of abandonment) isn't touched, he is very good at handling interpersonal conflicts, and that's what's interesting to me.
qiao ling hides relevant information from him? he removes himself from the situation to give himself space and sort out his feelings. he tells her he's fine and that he'll be back.
post-earthquake arc? I'll just copy paste what I already said in a previous ask:
what initially got me was when I was first watching S1, I thought the earthquake arc would have devastating effects on [shiguang's] relationship. listen, I didn’t know what I was getting into with link click, but I thought that was expected. it’s ripe for drama! but how do they handle the fight? they put their side business on hold but they still keep being roommates. they still do their day job. they still talk. they’re still upset but they give each other space but not to the point where they can’t stand existing in each other’s spaces. that’s when I realized that oh, they really trust each other. they have a very solid foundation for their relationship that not even the earthquake arc can break. they’re pretty level-headed about this, actually, all things considered? all the doomed yaoi stuff came later, but that’s just the cherry on top. it’s the way they handled conflict and disappointment in S1 that got me.
okay, protect-namine, why go through that whole tangent? BECAUSE! circling back to yingdu episode 5, we finally, finally get to see cheng xiaoshi let out some of his anger. and it's precisely because his primary trauma point was on the table. he can forgive a friend lying, and he can forgive being told not to change the past. because at the end of the day, qiao ling and lu guang stayed. they never left him.
but he cannot handle abandonment. he cannot understand why people leave. he cannot understand why he's been clinging on to false hope this entire time. and more importantly, he cannot understand how someone can be such a hypocrite about it. "a man who'd rather be kind to strangers than face his own son" like fuck man. cheng weimin you fucked up so bad.
it's the disconnect/connect thing again too. thematically, it makes sense. when does cheng xiaoshi blow up? when he's alone, far away from the people that ground him. alone, the feeling he hates the most. he's not even in his own body. he blows up when he's inhabiting a stranger's. he doesn't even get to be angry as cheng xiaoshi.
how fucked up is that. man. I love him so much.
also I'm going crazyyyy over the family themes going on in link click. much to say about the show itself across all seasons (the twins, qiao ling and cheng xiaoshi, even the liu siblings), but for this episode... god. okay this is slight speculation territory now and I'll try to keep this very short, because this is only tangential to the post. but. imagine xia fei getting the good parent figure in cheng weimin that cheng xiaoshi never had. and he doesn't know!! he's bitter inside about his dad and he's having hotpot with xia fei and he doesn't know he was in that school!! fuck that's so good. that's so juicy.
okay, sorry, I have a lot of feelings about cheng xiaoshi. he's my link click blorbo of all time, and I love when he experiences The Horrors™ because it's also when other sides of him gets to shine.
on a brighter note:
VEIN AND CHENG XIAOSHI MEETING AGAIN!!! their greeting was so cute. also omg does xia fei know? that his boss is maybe possibly a cannibal? actually, wait, I don't think I'd be surprised if he does know.
ah and finally. finally:
I've been having many thoughts on how yingdu approaches "friendships" and their transactional nature (mostly with regards to liu xiao) but I mostly thought they're headcanon stuff. but now. I'm so so happy that episode 5 is bringing out more of the quid pro quo theme. liu xiao with the gift giving. wang qing's "friends" (bullies) demanding her to cheat on the exam for them. and now, vein and cheng xiaoshi having a friendly greeting but also exchanging favors. so good. so good. it goes along with how there's so much handshakes and handholding this season (not just with lu guang and cheng xiaoshi, but with cheng xiaoshi and the the antagonist trio too, who have all met him by "helping" him in some way). something something trust and favors. probably something that deserves its own post though, but I wanted to point this out because I am soooo here for that. it's goes hand in hand (ha!) with the whole fraud/lies vs innocence/honesty theme this season, and deals/contracts being an equalizer to the two. very good. very tasty.
edit: ooh they also point to this in the YE6 trailer too. nice, nice. if you knew someone's true colors, would you still be their friend?
man, I love episode 5. it just hits all the stuff I personally wanted to see. the only flaw is that we still haven't seen the older version of wang qing, but yeah I kinda expected that they'll hide her until episode 6. they're giving her the liu xiao treatment from season 2. sigh. really wish she'd keep showing up in S3, we need more female characters in this show 🙏
#mine musings#liveblogging link click#link click#link click spoilers#the fic writer in me is so pleased. this is validating so much of the direction i want my fic to go#i'm sorry if this reads as very rambly. this post could probably be shorter but i don't wanna fix this up to make it read better#my emotions for cxs are too much to be organized in a logical manner#no meta-formatted essay like my post with qiao ling. this is just me blorbofying him#literally half stream of consciousness writing. cxs you are so loved. i love u. i hope you get cuddles but i love when you face The Horrors#because i know you can handle it. and also you needed to blow up like YESTERDAY so honestly this is therapy for you now#actually you know what. i'll probably reference this in the future for fic purposes so yeah i'll tag it#link click meta#actually i'll add one more thing re: maturity but i'll put it here in the tags#something i love about cxs. is that no matter the trauma he goes through. he is still kind#like this could've been anyone's villain origin story. but cxs works hard to be kind in spite of his experiences#like back again with conflating big emotions with immaturity. but choosing to be kind despite it all? it takes a lot of heart to do that
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Their April Phools this year was surprisingly pretty tame compared to the literal short found footage horror film we received last year. However, I loved that, similar to Dystopia Daily, WAD, and TIT, they used this as yet another opportunity to criticize content-creators and their incessant need to monetize and exploit every aspect of their livelihoods, especially and in spite of the ways in which they are detrimental to the environment and jeopardize those who are literally incapable of consent. I just love Dan and Phil's ability to always make humor out of their blatant critique of society and internet culture.
#there is so much more I could write about this#but I just woke up and I've got work to do#please feel free to add onto this I'd love to see other people's thoughts on this#I just love that every year with their april phools they give us something to really think about and analyze#it's like homework but the kind you actually want to do because you just love the subject so much#I need to write more essays like actual essays#I yearn for academia#sol speaks#april phools#april fools#dan and phil#phan#daniel howell#phil lester#amazingphil#phaby#branding#content#content creators#influencers#internet culture#dip and pip#dnpc#dapc#we're all doomed#wad#wad tour#dystopia daily#titour#dnptit
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How are we feeling today, people who read pokespe?
#pokemon#hardenshipping#pokemon special#I CANT#Theyre living in my brain rent free#sometimes i just remember that Archie really called him friend after everything#after we see him being so cold to everyone and after he killed Maxie#and it makes me want to break walls#and then i remember how theyre die together peacefully after everything#theyre so calm because theyre together and theyre know they did their best#and it makes me so sad so sick so emotional im going to cry someday#also#the fact archie ask maxie about if he want to work together again#first of all thats kind of ironic and emotional after we knoe archie killed maxie#second thing its that jts funny because in the beginning its maxie who asks for working together perhaps#i can't#i want to write essay about them im actuallt going to do it and then post it here#so every one of you will cry again
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Lois and Clark 2x13
#lois and clark: the new adventures of superman#lois and clark#tnaos#my gifs#my gifs: tnaos#they crashed into each other in the dark#after one of the lamps blew out#Lois stroking his pec is actually insane#it feels so intimate to me#like who does that to their friend who they are on an almost-first date with?#As easy as it would be to have them make out here or even go further than that#I'm kind of glad they didn't#and I love the way he's making it a point to not touch her and get too intimate#i mean i guess first of all they're WORKING doing surveillance#so they can't just make out#but they're also drinking wine so where's the line? lol#but also I like that they're being cautious#like at least they're making steps towards a relationship#but not rushing the intimacy part#although I think Lois would have crossed that line#if he didn't say 'i guess so' when she said 'I guess I should get up'#but ALSO we don't find out until s3 that Clark is a virgin bc he'd been waiting for the right person#and even tho Clark knew the second he first saw her that she is his person#Lois doesn't know that yet#and they're nowhere near making a commitment#and he's still not ready to even tell her he's Superman#someday I'm going to write an essay about Clark wanting wait until they're married to have sex#because I have big feelings about it :')#krista watches tnaos#90s clois
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something something foils moving in opposite directions Goku's always happy to seek and fight stronger opponents because he spent most of his life being the strongest guy in the room and Vegeta wants to be the strongest/is always exhausted to find stronger opponents because he spent most of his life having to navigate his survival around the whims of the strongest guy in the universe room and so Goku has a foundation of safety and stability and so spends his time craving challenge and adventure and Vegeta has a foundation of challenge and adventure and spends his time craving safety and stability and the overlaid section of their venn diagram is that the only way they know how acquire and maintain those things is through battle
#thank you this has been the laziest media analysis post of my career#dbtag#media analysis#something something a game to goku is a threat to vegeta etc#there's a pinned thought here about how Vegeta also didn't learn about the dragon balls until he was ?? 30?? and so all loss is permanent#and goku has been familiar since he was ~12 and hasn't faced a permanent consequence since he was 10 years old and even then he got closure#sometimes I think about how Vegeta saw Trunks die and how Krillin was mad at him for reacting since they could fix it with the dragon balls#but Vegeta has very limited experience with the dragon so to him in that moment that was permanent and Trunks was Dead. Forever.#And we talked before in a 2am post about Vegeta having never experienced grief born of love and I stand by it because his feelings then wer#still very new and very odd and not something he'd accepted until that moment so it was raw power but not as powerful as it could've been#all this to say in my heart of hearts I think Vegeta deserves to retire at the end of super (if super continues) -- not as a warrior#but as an infantryman. he's a prince and now he's got his domain and his family and his planet to look after and I think he deserves#to go home and stay home and help piccolo bully gohan into training more often when goku inevitably leaves to hop the multiverse#geets wanted to take a sabbatical when Bulla was born but didn't get the chance because Freeza coming back freaked him out too much#but whether freeza gets a redemption arc or gets defeated -- Granolah's arc seemed to shift his perspective on being the strongest#and I just grips fist I just think it would be a really nice full circle for Vegeta to inherit his throne in a way he never expected and#finally get his kingdom to look after and protect in the way that he was looking forward to being king of his own planet all those years ag#Goku's got Broly and Jiren and Hit and all the others to keep him busy and happy now -- and if Freeza gets a redemption arc he'll probably#continue playing slap-ass with Goku for the rest of his life -- and Vegeta's got Gohan and Piccolo and Goten and Trunks#I just think them getting a nice bittersweet 'This is where we part ways' would be really nice for both of them because !!#They couldn't have done this without each other. They couldn't have known this kind of life was possible without each other.#So they swap lots and live happier than they ever imagined they could be#especially since Vegeta has proved to himself that he can close any gap Goku creates in progress that's not a concern anymore#And obvs the door's always open!! There's no point closing it Vegeta's tried the locks they don't work on Goku#anyway here's me putting the whole essay in the tags again#this isn't an essay as much as it is stream of consciousness tag blogging#anyway i'm too lazy to write fic or draw comics so we get ramblings instead
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Ace Attorney AU August (halfway progress update!)
Okay technically it's the 16th (lol, 17th by the time this is done) so a little over halfway actually, but still I thought since I haven't had anything finished to post the past few days this would be a fun alternative!
I've been going a little nuts (affectionate) over @augustwritingchallenge's AU-gust prompts list this year so August has been a wild ride (about 40k words of one, in fact. so far.) but seeing as I will get attached to even the jokiest of AU ideas instantly, I've completed* a whopping 5 whole fics of 16, lol. Considering the shortest of those is over 3k and the longest is over 12k, I think the problem with not finishing these in a timely manner is entirely on my verbose foolish thick skull, haha, but I'm still having a blast with it.
Here is my ao3 series where I'm posting!
And a rundown / progress report / quick teaser of all the AUs including those I've yet to finish, if anyone's interested:
(*by "completed" I should note two of the already posted fics are basically assuredly going to be continued past the challenge, but let's say "completed enough to post and be on theme")
1. Canon Divergence - complete - 4.5k words ("For the Murder of Mr. Wrong" link)
Mia POV, gen. What if Dahlia succeeded in poisoning Phoenix and framed Doug Swallow instead (and then Mia defended him in court)? Basically a 3-1 rewrite. Fun Fact: I only came up with this AU because before I even remembered AU-gust existed at all, I'd come up with like 4 totally separate AUs in which I poison Phoenix in various ways With Real Consequences because it amuses me, lol, but he survives all those other ones and I eventually realized I hadn't even considered straight up killing him off yet so I figured I should try it at least once, haha.
2. Colorless - complete 1st chapter - 3.2k words ("Grey Matters" link)
Phoenix POV (for 1st ch --prob alternating after), wrightworth. "You can't see color until the first time you touch your soulmate"-soulmate AU. 1st chapter is their first meeting as kids (skipping the class trial itself). Fun Fact(s): I really love a color soulmate AU! Big fan of the "only see the color of their eyes" type of one too but uhhh on top of that working better for things that have wild anime eye colors, you could not pay me enough to try to figure out what the HELL is going on with Ace Attorney eye colors at any given time lmfao. (Also--spoilers for what i haven't written yet but hey if you're here you earned it--this IS one of my very many "teehee what if i poison Phoenix just a smidge as a treat for me" fics. NOT my fault the man ATE GLASS. That's on him.)
3. Dark Academia - complete "1st chapter" - 4.4k words ("The Spirit of the Laws of Magic" link)
Mia POV, lanamia. Magical boarding school setting featuring corruption and missing-student conspiracies and a most likely overthought system of magic with hierarchies and prejudices in societal views of academic/formulaic vs folk/innate magic. Fun Fact: I really thought for SURE i was going to skip this day entirely, lol. (foolish.) I don't think i've actually ever personally read anything "dark academia", technically--so if this doesn't read EXACTLY that way, there you go, but i did my best. I also then thought I could live with keeping this vague but I accidentally thought about it too long so... plus at least two people on top of myself at this point have expressed interest in more of this and so I have some semi-concrete Plans™ now.
4. Zombie Apocalypse - conceptualized (but not started)
Concept: probably gen and Phoenix POV, but also because I'm me and they're them, at least a little bit wrightworth even if it isn't necessarily explicit in any meaningful way bc they are Not Normal about each other lol. A little sketchy on how much of an "AU" this counts for, since it could probably be argued to be canon compliant somehow, but basically just: Universe where they make a Pride and Prejudice and Zombies-type Steel Samurai reboot movie thing (featuring, you guessed it, zombies), and Miles comes over and forces Phoenix to watch it with him just to have someone to bitch about it at, and then during that time Maya blows her way into Phoenix's apartment as well with the exact same intentions except her "day job" isn't quite as time-sensitive-strict so she's already finished watching it earlier and knows all the spoilers. Honestly a good chance Phoenix and Pearl (who came with Maya) end up hiding out in the kitchen together to let Maya and Miles rile each other up in front of the TV, but I'm never exactly sure where they'll take me once I wind them up and set them loose on the page, so who knows. I also hadn't necessarily determined the exact time frame yet but for it to make sense as a reboot-type movie/special episode/whatever it probably should be 7yg-or-later so Trucy may or may not be there as well. (That said, in my struggles to complete an actually short one-shot, I probably shouldn't even include Pearl let alone Trucy, lol.) Fun Fact: I also thought I'd skip this day bc I'm not the biggest zombie guy in the world, and to be fair, I managed to do Way Less with it than the dark academia prompt so, yippie?
5. Chess Players - incomplete (currently 3k word WIP)
Miles POV, wrightworth. Miles is a chess grandmaster and back in Japanifornia for the upcoming world cup tournament, but his greatest challenge is actually to FINALLY best Franziska in their annual who-can-get-the-best-Christmas-gift competition. Luckily, he just so happened to hear of an artist who makes bespoke chess sets, so the plan is to get a custom board made for Franziska without her finding out. The plan is not to get trapped in a weird art collective labyrinth with some model-photographer named Cindy who keeps hitting on him but also happens to be protective of the artist he's there to see because "she and her boyfriend kinda-sorta owe him big time", but this is what he gets for coming here without doing any extra research into the artist besides seeing his work and hearing only "his name is White, or, eh, something like that, you know how those artist types are" from Mr. Amano. (AU where we replace law with chess and no I don't think Phoenix could necessarily hack it in the top-world-grandmasters-level of chess tournaments HOWEVER have you considered he DID go to art school so what if he just tries selling custom chess sets until somehow that reconnects him with Miles. Is that somehow a more insane plan than studying law? Maybe. Did Manfred still shoot Gregory but now it was over fucking chess? Maybe. Idk. But I did let Greg live this time at least!) Fun Fact: we can all DEFINITIVELY blame my lovely, terrible, very wonderful friend Ben (shameless friend plug! she's an outstanding writer and has some AA fics of her own too!! @kindlystrawberry on tumblr!!) for making a total joke about "well what about au where they make chess pieces instead" while i lamented not knowing enough about chess to write an actual match and spawning this ENTIRE concept. It is her fault. 100%. She is the guilty party. (I want to finish this one VERY BADLY. Save me.)
EVIDENCE!!!!! Guilty.
6. Reality Show - incomplete (currently 700 word WIP)
Phoenix (& Franziska) POV(s), background wrightworth wedding planning going on as set up but it's also definitely just one of my many excuses to set Phoenix and Franziska up as bitchy worsties who can't admit they enjoy each other's company and will cut you down if you suggest it as such. So far I've only written the quote "set-up" section which is in Phoenix's POV, but that was SUPPOSED to be like 5 paragraphs and cut away and then lead into my actual plan for the main body, which was to be in Franz's instead, so. This is very similar to the zombie one in that it's them watching reality tv instead of being contestants on a show (I don't personally like or watch a lot of reality tv so my creative well was somewhat dry on how to make that work) and then I accidentally thought about Phoenix and Franziska watching something just to judge and tear apart the decisions of every person on it and that was too fun to not consider further, haha. Basically the plan is just they get left alone together and don't know what to do with that and end up wine-drunk and making fun of some reality dating show of some kind and Miles and Trucy come back to them losing it together over something stupid and are like "......uh. what's happening." Fun Facts: I really love the thought experiment of Franziska somehow discovering how often Phoenix's internal dialogue/reads on situations and especially people can be So Bitchy And Judgey despite his affable complexion, and her unfortunately finding his opinions to SOMETIMES be somehow slightly okay. Moderately correct, even--occasionally. I know the section she follows you-as-Phoenix around in T&T is really not long at ALL, but I adore it. There's something about it that so badly makes me want to force them into proximity more (to both their chagrin, I'm sure).
7. Farm/Ranch - complete - 12k words ("Two Little Dickey Byrdes" link)
Gumshoe POV, gumbyrde (tho i still think dickeybyrde is a funnier ship name). 5+1 things--except more like maybe 7-or-8+1 to be honest--so it's more: over 5 times Dick and Maggey sit on a wall together and 1 time they find someone else there instead. AKA: Dick runs his family's small farm (think fantasy farm like in a farming sim or maybe horse girl novel type of thing that has nothing to do with what a real farm is like lol don't worry about it) and Maggey starts working at the next farm over as the latest of her many odd jobs. Fun Fact: oh god this one got so far away from me. it was not supposed to be this long lmao. it's literally the elaborate set-up to a very silly Nursery-Rhyme-I-Didn't-Even-Know-About-Prior-To-This -based punchline!?! still, i was pleasantly surprised by how happy i was with this once it was done... two sittings and about 16 total hours later. haha).
8. Nomad - incomplete (planned/outlined)
Apollo (or possibly Klavier) POV, klapollo. Sort of Jove-Thalassa swap adjacent, but basically: AU where Jove survives the Khura'in fire but loses his memories for [contrived convince sake reasons]. (And also possibly loses some or all of his eyesight just to really go for the parallels?) Therefore: Jove and Apollo stay with Dhurke and Nahyuta and the Defiant Dragons for a time, while Jove recovers, but eventually they leave and head out on their own, just the two of them, and do the traveling musician thing, both because it's dangerous in Khura'in and Dhurke already canonically didn't want Apollo to get caught up in it and potentially get hurt to begin with and because with a functioning actual parent Apollo doesn't need to be taken in by him--and also Jove from what little we know seems like he prefers to be on the move and was already a world traveler anyhow, so even amnesiac maybe he gets a little antsy stuck in one place too long. And so like amnesiac Thalassa, Jove thusly becoming a renowned mysterious musician--and then Apollo, sweet tone deaf Apollo, becoming the sonager of all time (like a momager but...you get it) because he's not that into music but he IS into arguing for better conditions/making deals (contracts!! international legalese!! woohoo!!) with venues and promoters and stuff. And then--oops dang Lamioir still exists and now they have a meet-cute (2 electric bugaloo) (but by then it's later enough Trucy still exists because it will be a cold day in hell when I don't find a way to make her work) and they do music collabs or join up to form a group or whatever and OOPS this means now that Apollo and Jove are with Lamioir when The Gavinners / Klavier specifically meet her and get her to come to do the Guitar's Serenade concert eventually. And Apollo and Klavier ofc thusly also have a meet-cute and then talk and bond etc etc. AND THEN the au STOPS THERE and I DON'T think about how without Apollo Phoenix is totally getting convicted of Zak's murder because there's no way that trial works out as well for him with some other attorney and I also don't think about how reasonable it would then be that maybe Trucy ends up helping Valant with his work setting up the trick for the concert afterward on account of the one father in prison and the other being dead and having left behind a notarized confession clearing Valant's name of suspicion, etc. AND I DEFINITELY do not think about how i could then still so easily get everyone in one place at the concert for Turnabout Serenade and/or any possible funny Sibling (And Thalassa) Reveal that could happen i dont i dont i do not--
9. Accidental Baby Acquisition - conceptualized (not started)
Gen, possibly my weakest / least defined idea on this list, but basically: Phoenix kind of already lives this in canon, lol (insomuch as an 8yo counts as a baby) so I thought, well, how to take it a different direction, then? And I thought, I don't usually go for a Phoenix Fey kind of au because I personally really love the relationships he has with all the Feys as-is in canon and so it's not quite as funny to me as, say, a Miles Fey AU where like Misty and Gregory are married, or any of the ones in that bent, because I'm sorry but that's just SO funny (and sad, but mostly funny) any way you slice it--plus his NAME is RIGHT THERE mia-miles-maya he FITS--anyhow, that completely aside, there are just a lot of reasons I really love the platonic relationships the Feys already have with Phoenix and I don't think it NEEDS to be made specifically familial to still be so very important, y'know? BUT. That said. AU where Phoenix is idk abandoned as a baby or maybe his parents die young or something and it's like a Thing to leave babies at temples or churches or whatever, right? So like--Phoenix adopted by the Feys AU but only because the more i considered it the more i thought it would be WILD for him to literally know Maya her entire life, and it's fascinating to me to consider a Maya who ISN'T basically left all alone to her own devices (and Morgan's) and who has someone absolutely in her corner in the village the entire time even after Mia leaves (who isn't a baby when Mia leaves, love you tho Pearls), AND also and perhaps more importantly, the ships-passing-in-the-night-ness of a scene where, like: Morgan does something sketchy or whatever and Phoenix wants to keep Mia updated but for whatever reason decides to go down to the city and actually tell her in person and so he's waiting outside the courthouse or something (possibly part of or perhaps Most Of the reason he goes in person is because he knows her first courtroom trial is that day and he wants to see her + hear how it went) and when he gets there she's in a heated argument with some asshole in a fancy over-embellished jacket and once that guy leaves Phoenix is like "Sheesh, what's his problem?" You know???? And maybe he really would never even know!!!! Bc he grew up in Kurain!!!! And has no reason to care!!! About some random prosecutor who was mean to Mia!! Aaaah!!! So that, and on top of that, Diego would be there too ofc at that point, and I feel like he would ALSO be quite a funny interaction in this scenario. ("Wow, someone's popular, kitten, you have all sorts of guys waiting on a chance to talk to you, heh?" "Uh.--I'm sorry, WHAT did you just call her")
10. Enemies-to-Allies - incomplete (currently 370 word WIP)
Ema POV, faraskye. Cyberpunk AU where Lana is still under Gant's thumb and Ema, with no other way to stay close to her and getting rejected from any of the sorts of jobs she really wants to do, decides to just join the security force (or cyber police or w/e I decide to call it) and is tasked with hunting down the Yatagarasu, guerilla hacker supreme who is threatening the sanctity of the capitalist overlords. Except Ema's squad gets ambushed and she's captured and tied to a pole, and with her useless fop partner seemingly not coming to rescue her (if he even noticed her absence), she does some quick cost-benefit analysis and decides she didn't really like that job anyway and maybe there's another way she can get her sister back in her life. So she breaks free of her own handcuffs (which she definitely didn't modify into incidental ineffectiveness she's still testing for bugs) and helps fix the "Little Thief" device her captor seems to have broken despite how obviously valuable and impressive the tech is, and they eventually come to something of an agreement. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, and all that. Either Ema as the hardware-engineer one and Kay as the software-programming one as the two sides of the tech coin, or else Kay can just be like doing the physical sneaking kind of spy stuff only--or maybe she knows a little about software but not so much she's a pro the way she is with infiltration and such. Possibly toying with the idea Kay herself is just completely an android, but if not, I think she has some cybernetic cyborg things going on regardless. Possibly from or inspired by her father? I also like the idea that Gant did something maybe more drastic with regards to having dirt on Ema to get Lana to do his bidding--like maybe Ema has a whole cybernetic hand because instead of just her handprint on a leather jacket, Gant has some sicko jar with her entire hand in it in his office safe, or something. I don't know why this would be useful to him but it is certainly an image. I also find it funny if Miss Fingerprint Powder Enthusiast doesn't actually have any fingerprints of her own anymore somehow in this AU, lol.
11. Retail Worker - complete - 6.7k words ("The Bake Anything Boulangerie" link)
Apollo POV, gen. Phoenix gets a job at a bakery instead of the Borscht Bowl Club during the 7 year gap, and Apollo happens to stumble across it and ends up meeting the Wrights while he's still in high school. He becomes a regular at the bakery and is already close to them by the time "Shadi Smith's" murder comes around. And also, yes, sibling reveal right away--at least as soon as Phoenix realizes and can reveal it. As a treat. (Other reveals, though, I might put poor Apollo through on a delayed basis. Also as a treat, lmao, just not one for him.) Fun Fact: I'm being redundant bc this is also in my a/n, but, Baker Phoenix lives rent-free in my brain because Professor Layton vs Phoenix Wright was in fact the very first Ace Attorney game I ever played, technically, and Maya and Phoenix semi-brainwashed in that bakery was literally one of my first impressions of them. ........followed immediately by starting a let's play of Justice for All (which i watched through the first case, after which I was like oKAY fine maybe i DO need more context here, i should probably figure out what the actual first game is, and went back to start the series properly at the beginning hahaha). What do you MEAN i have a disproportionate fascination with amnesiac Phoenix, even if I have yet to finish and publish one of my myriad AUs that utilize stupid, unrealistic, plot convenient re-temporary amnesia?? Hm???? Idk what you're talking about. Also everyone who complains about 2-1 is wrong lmao it's objectively (okay subjectively is what i'm saying yes BUT objectively) such a funny place to start without knowing broad plot strokes, it's great. I both knew so much and absolutely shit-all nothing about Maya after PLvPW and 2-1, LMAO. god.
12. Animagus Wings (Joker) - incomplete (planned/outlined)
Miles POV, wrightworth. Angel/Demon AU, except I'm playing super fast and loose with the rules on that because all my knowledge of Christian-mythos comes from firstly and unknowingly the Chronicles of Narnia and more recently and cognizantly Lucifer (Netflix) and Good Omens. I know that's probably more or less what we're all doing with this kind of AU but still, I'm not even sure I want to refer to Heaven and Hell here, I'm kinda on the fence about maybe just keeping it all very vague? I also accidentally semi-worldbuilt more than i intended incidentally on account of "But Then How-Why Names If Angelic Creatures?" Format-wise it would semi-follow gomens s1 where it's hopping through some meetings between long stretches but also a kind of pre- and post- Fall type of thing? And potentially à la Lucifer becoming, like, these are My Mortal Humans and i will be Spending Time With Them, screw you celestial duties, I'm making my own Free Will, etc. And i mean i guess Lucifer is also a crime procedural lmao maybe they still solve crimes in the end too. Fun Fact: I didn't want to do the original prompt for several reasons, and sure fuck jkr is one of them but even before I knew about her I still wasn't really the biggest hp person in the first place? So i wouldn't know/don't remember at all the way it works without having to do the specific research and i...don't want to haha. Hence. And I know the prompt seems to be using it loosely / might just be borrowing the word and not actually referencing hp specifically but tbh either way human-animal shifter things just in general I can be somewhat picky about haha. (Okay okay plus full disclosure the ONLY idea I have for this sort of thing actually ties into my day-3-dark-academia-extended-au-verse and i COULD make my life simpler by just connecting the two days but Heh who would I be if I simplified things for myself... *sigh*) All that to say: I saw "wings" on the wild card list and I thought, ooh, well that's still sort of a related concept! Let's tag that one in! So it's still kind of day 12 prompt-adjacent, if you squint.
13. Found Footage - incomplete (planned/outlined)
Video Transcript POV? Is that a thing? Possibly capped by a little Phoenix POV (but i don't want that to get too long), wrightworth. Larry's new girlfriend of the month bakes weed brownies and Larry does not realize this and swings by the Wrights' apartment to beg some kind of help off Phoenix and forgets the whole tray there somehow (because it's Larry) and they leave to deal with Larry's thing and by the time they figure the brownies out, in some twist of fate Miles and Trucy have been hanging out (last minute babysitter/adult supervision? but she's at the very very least 14 or 15 here and most likely older, and Nick clearly isn't the most strict about like uhhh supervision in general lol sooo idk. he's helping her with a project or smth. it doesn't really actually matter; he's THERE, that's the important thing.) The point I'm very clearly getting at is they accidentally get incredibly high (not dangerously so because I'm not going that far haha but also, neither of them has actually been high before, so they are Affected) before Phoenix finds out what was in the brownies and tries to warn Trucy and hurry home to like, dispose of them or at least put a warning label on them or whatever, but he is too late lol. By a lot. Definitely an underage drugs tag on this bad boy because it's definitely sometime 18-or-earlier for Trucy, let alone 21. (idk about other places but as a Californian I can tell you Japanifornia "LA" could theoretically have it legalized at 21 for anyone (like alcohol) and 18 with Dr's permission--which Trucy definitely does not have in this AU lol.) Basically, Phoenix grabs Trucy's phone to get photo evidence so he can let them never live this down (after making sure they're okay lmao), but he ofc doesn't get technology so he doesn't realize he leaves the phone still recording when Trucy asks him for something / needs his help, so the recording just keeps going and captures a lot of tomfoolery and eventually some inebriated-to-Extremely-sober Feelings-Adjacent confessions (or maybe more like allusions). Idk, this was actually a fic I thought of before August and wanted to use as an excuse to try a Weird Format for fun, but then i saw this was a prompt on the list and...well. Fun Fact: Cannabis was legalized in California on November 8, 2016 (the first election I could vote in!!! ......uh, rip. lol. but yeah babey I helped legalize weed at least!! gotta remember the positives), which means it was legal right in time for Miles' case(s) / Turnabout Goodbyes!!! Yay!! I mean, I suppose that's genuinely seriously one way to try to mitigate nightmares and manage insomnia--not that I think Miles Edgeworth would ever deign stoop so low as to use an aid to manage his severe PTSD and trauma symptoms, psshaw, who do you take him for? (Get these people some help lol. They all need so much therapy.)
14. Princes & Princesses - conceptualized (not started)
So I've been reading a lot (a LOT) of isekai and/or revenge reincarnation romance fantasy manhwas lately (like, oh, too many, hahaha. they're quite good and they're VERY popular in webcomics at the moment.) Soooo. Soft pitch: Apollo already gets slapped into so many wild backstories he's constantly trying to dodge in an effort to be just a Normal Guy, he's honestly, like, the PERFECT protagonist for one of these lmao. And tell me Kristoph doesn't make a perfect "Upstanding Duke" kind of persona, and Klavier couldn't be the "wild rake" younger brother no one expects much from, and all I'm saying is it wouldn't be that hard to contrive a reason Apollo tries to get Klavier to agree to a contract marriage the way all these stories go, lol. And also, something something, Apollo from the "real world" is an orphan/has an absent family (also like so many of these manhwa protagonists, lol) but then he gets to actually have one in his second life!! I'm such a sucker for that shit. Slightly harder pitch, and the reason I did not let myself actually start writing anything (...yet): so what if the actual plot of the "original romance novel" Apollo is familiar with from the "real world (Earth)" is actually about the slightly older generation and something something instead of admiring Phoenix as a defense attorney, it's just that he instead was Apollo's favorite "love interest" character (not, like, for himself, just the one he most liked to read about) in every way except what a blithering idiot he became when the author had him fall for the female lead--but BEFORE that, he's a cool information guild leader guy who seems like he's trying to work toward some way to improve conditions for commoners in the kingdom (but abruptly there are no more mentions of this after he gets involved with the lead, which is annoying). Aaaand... I guess what I'm saying is, Dahlia is the original female lead because she REALLY fits the whole White Lotus trope, and I'm thinking Klavier is the original male lead because A) hilarious, B) fits in with the idea there's more going on in the ACTUAL world Apollo ends up in that is written in such a way as to make things seem different in the novel (like, that Dahlia and Klavier are actually as nice as they seem and that the terrible things that happen around them are just the trials and tribulations of being main characters and not anything they're directly involved in). And Apollo, the character in the novel Apollo, is an adopted prince of Khura'in, but he's the sickly younger prince and of course not actually of the royal bloodline (and also a man, considering Khura'in is matrilineal), so Rayfa and Nahyuta are the ones the public and other nobles actually know and care about and deal with. But wait! As it so turns out, The Wright Anything Information Guild (I feel like the actual guild name CAN'T have their freaking name on it front and center lol but you get the idea) happens to know some other things that aren't really expanded on in the original novel, and might be key to preventing Apollo's death so he doesn't follow the path of the original story, and also idk maybe Apollo and Trucy are half-fae or something like that and instead of like Aw Yay Bracelet in this AU it's more of a secret Iron Shackle Tool That Will Hurt I Mean Totally-Definitely-Help Us Later (still, in a way, passed down to him by Thalassa, but more as, like... she's kind of a secret hostage and does not manage to hide pregnancy number one so Apollo's now also a secret hostage, but she manages to escape so they don't know about Trucy, only she didn't tell Apollo basically anything to "keep him as safe as possible" or w/e, and......) Well, anyway. It got away from me before I even really wrote anything, that's all.
15. Secretly Alien - unfinished (currently 2.6k WIP)
Trucy POV, gen. Apollo gets sick of very consistently always losing the card games they play at the Wright Anything Agency (usually and in the specific instance the fic starts, Bullshit/BS) and in a stroke of inspiration somehow ropes everyone into playing Among Us instead. ("What! It's still a game of trying to lie/trick everyone else--like you like!--but I actually stand a freaking chance, so we're playing this or I'm going home.") Yes. This is my Among Us AU. Hi. They play Among Us. I'm justifying this one as prime AU territory however because A) Among Us has to exist in this universe, and even more pressingly, B) I found a way to force Phoenix to have--for at least a period of time if not moving forward in perpetuity--an actual smartphone instead of a Nokia-type brick cellphone. Which even under the wild but somehow plausible considering Ace Attorney circumstances I contrived, is just automatically a complete AU lmao. Fun Fact: I am so mad this one wasn't just totally finished day-of, lol. Why I ever thought I could give myself run of an entire WAA 4-person conversation and NOT get instantly derailed is beyond me. (And I want to get the prosecutors there, too?? Someone take the characters away from me.) Anyway. No, I have not written ANY of the actual Among Us part yet. Sigh. Also I haven't personally played amogus since like, 2021? maybe? And I know (now) that it's been pretty updated since then, but, ehhh, I'm just gonna run off like, lockdown-era amogus rules and vibes, lol. If I can get to the game part.
16 - Hobby Drama - conceptualized
I'm going to go out of order this time to say: Fun Fact: I have ALWAYS wanted to write a Reddit-style fic!!! I absolutely love them and I've read some REALLY, really good ones, so I've always wanted to try my hand at it. So theoretically this is the perfect time to make that a reality and write a r/HobbyDrama subreddit fic, buuut I got stuck before starting because I'm torn on two possible routes to take it (I can easily foresee myself caving and just doing both lol). - Option 1: Steel Samurai fandom discourse, always a fun/funny thing to think about, definitely would enjoy having Maya and Miles post some stuff for that. - Option 2: courtroom law fandom discourse, because come ON, how are those galleries ALWAYS SO FULL. The little wiggling rabba-rabba onlookers have GOT to have investment in this shit. And why WOULDN'T they, honestly. I've seen those trials and I have, in fact, spent a Lot of time thinking about them, not that any posts I've made lately would reflect that in any way or anything. Like I know it's hard to tell, but if I can be invested in the Lawyers Fandom, who's to say the people in the courtrooms aren't????? And I LOVE an outsider POV fic actually, I think they're so fun. So anyway. Reddit fic. You will be mine. Just as soon as I can hone my energy
And, what the hell, since it's so late now by the time I complete this "Heh This'll Be So Quick To Throw Together" post, I'll include today's, too:
17 - Flower Shop - conceptualized (at work earlier today. lol)
AU where Daddy Hawthorne is like, 97% less shitty. And the Hawthornes have a flower shop instead of like a gemstone industry or whatever. And he takes both Dahlia and Iris with him instead of dumping one of his daughters at a fucking secluded mountain temple and seemingly forgetting about her forever. On second thought, maybe what I actually mean is he's like 999% less shitty, lmfao. Anyway, Iris POV, but Dahlia (while not a "nice" person by any stretch) is not pushed to such extremes or nearly as desperate as canon, so Valerie lives, Terry Fawles lives, Doug Swallow lives, and Dahlia gets to live a good life overall--because as much fun as I love using her as a villain, she's really such a product of the absolute worst circumstances and I really do find her interesting so I've been kind of wanting to explore her in a less cartoonishly evil light, haha. (Don't get me wrong, I do love the cartoonishly evil light too, but I like spicing things up sometimes.) Like, she does (more) normal teen rebellion things ("Look at my inappropriately older boyfriend, Dad" "I'm going to talk my way out of speeding tickets and petty shoplifting as a bid for attention" etc.) and she still totally orders Iris around and Iris still totally does whatever she asks very much to her own detriment and has to learn to break away and be her own person. Fun Fact: I have a very passionate love for Iris/Adrian Andrews. Is that. Um. Is that a ship anyone else has ever considered before? Is that just me? I'm not sure but very possibly I'll just make this a rarepair fic as a treat, for me alone, teehee. (Like... it's about the becoming the master of your own destiny it's about breaking out of codependent cycles it's about how I genuinely honestly think they'd be each other's type and have chemistry even though they've obviously never interacted lmao... idk what to tell you.)
AND THATS MY AU-GUST UPDATE POST!!!
If you made it this far, take a sprinkle of my undying affection, and may you be blessed with AU inspiration if you so desire it!! (If you do not desire it, hopefully you are not cursed with it. I do not take refunds if you are. Sorry.)
Wish me luck with completing some more fics soon!!! Unfortunately weekends are actually my least free time because I work the most and the earliest hours so I have less time and am more tired, but also on Wednesday I'm leaving for a family vacation, which will either be the BEST thing to happen in regards to AU-gust or the WORST thing lmfao. If nothing else I have 2 flights, and I actually Love writing on an airplane, so fingers crossed for it being Good. <3
EDIT: Now with part 2 for the rest of the month here!
#au gust 2024#au gust#ace attorney#ace attorney spoilers#OH this post is so long. i did not. mean for that to happen. but i had fun with it and now I've got all my ideas in one place! yay#i kind of feel bad about clogging the tags though so idk what even TO tag lol#wrightworth#narumitsu#lanamia#gumbyrde#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#mia fey#lana skye#larry butz#maya fey#dick gumshoe#maggey byrde#apollo justice#trucy wright#FUCK IT WE BALL im just tagging it all. i put enough time into this to justify clogging tags lol#i typed wrightworth so many times here despite liking narumitsu aesthetically more but in technicality im definitely#writing the localization characters and not naruhodou and mitsurugi.... so. meh. I'll survive lol#aaau-gust 2024#welcome to my patt ttalk#patt's prattle#idk why i have so many ramble tags when i am so bad about using this blog haha#i feel like I'm forgetting smth but if i am I'll get back to it later#I'll be posting everything else to the same ao3 series!! if you want me to ramble forever more about any of these literally#i will do it at the drop of a hat this is my entire personality lately lol. minimally ask me and I'll write you an essay
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Btw, if you ever see me post about a book/movie/game/ANYTHING, that is an open invitation to talk to me about it. Tell me your opinions, talk to me about your builds and characters for video games, scream at me about good or bad scenes in books, shows, or movies. (Or if there’s a book/movie/game/whatever that you think I’d like, TELL ME. Please give me recs.) There is nothing in the world I love more than talking about media of any kind (except for talking about my OCs but I know that’s a harder ask.)
Also, PLEASE tell me about your dnd characters. Make them in the sims and tag me in the post. Infodump and tag me. Infodump in my DMs. Ask for my Discord and message me there. I mean it. I am on my knees BEGGING for people to talk to me about not just things I love, but things YOU love.
Send me an ask (anon is ALWAYS on), a DM, ask for my Discord, anything. I swear on everything I hold dear that asks or DMs are never w bother. (/gen)
I’m always down to discuss plot, characters, mechanics, worldbuilding, any of it. TTRPGs/CRPGs and sci-fi/fantasy books + movies are the center of my wheelhouse, but honestly I just love having in-depth discussions about things. (Oh and I could (and have, much to my friends and family’s dismay) talk for HOURS about Black Sails.)
#I am sososososo serious about this. please. I beg of you.#and not to sound vain but ESPECIALLY if you decided to read/watch/play the thing bc of me.#Someone messaged me on my other blog to say ‘’I started doing this bc of you.’’ and it made my fucking life#morrigan.txt#this isn’t even me begging for attention. this is me saying ‘’I want to make friends and connect with people who enjoy the same things I do.#and I am so genuine about that.#unprompted asks about completely random shit are the best thing in the world.#idc if it’s just ‘’here’s a picture of my cat’’. I love talking to people.#(I am happy with the engagement I get on this blog but the one thing I will forever be jealous of is people who get random asks w/o asking.#ESPECIALLY people who get them about their OCs. ESEPCIALLY when it’s not sims story OCs.#Also when people get asks saying ‘’have you seen X? I think you’d like it.’’#or even just ‘’I just read [book you’ve talked about]. Here’s what I thought.’’#that’s the ONE kind of engagement I wish I got more of. Not for ‘’I want more attention’’ reasons#but Bc I just love talking to people about things we’re both passionate about.#I don’t have many people to discuss media with bc almost no one I know shares my tastes in media (assuming they read/watch/play at all…)#and I could talk about all kinds of media for hours.#Like I could write a multi-hour video essay on Black Sails alone.#or ramble about owlcat RPGs for DAYS.#and ofc D&D is my special interest so I could talk about that for YEARS.#(and I love talking about ttrpgs or crpgs in general as well!!)#having deep and detailed discussions about media is my all-time favorite pass time (both talking and listening to others talk)#and sure I can make all kinds of disjointed rambling posts on my personal blog but that’s not quite the same as engaging in a true DIALOGUE#even if that dialogue is just an ask and a reply.#okay. I’ll shut up now. it’s 5am here which means it’s 6am at home. why am I like this?)#in other news me and vesper watched a fucking 7 hour video essay on all 4 dragon age games and that’s what brought this on.#that and the fact that my dad is watching black sails and loves it but is not a ‘’let’s analyze things’’ person.#and I’m in agony not being able to have a true discussion about my favorite show.#and my mom is watching it too and is slightly more willing to discuss but definitely misses out on the finer points#plus both of them will only ‘’indulge ‘’ my talking about fiction for so long.#and most of my best friends either don’t share my tastes or just never finish things or just don’t read/watch tv at all. It’s AGONIZING.
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How do you feel about the increase in really weird NSFW ads on here (advertising panels that look like sexual encounters, and AI art apps that pride themselves on porn) but will take down NSFW posts from their users, even if it isn't technically sexual.
i hate all social media and it's consistent prioritising the advertisers over the users and the internet simply was a better place before capitalism sunk its hooks into it
#i could write essays about how capitalism ruined the internet.#i was actually talking to someone earlier today about how youtube was kind of effectively ruined by monetisation.#and they were raised in the soviet union and we had a bit of a talk about how art was better because it wasn't for profit.#the people who made art made it because they wanted to do it and because they loved it.#she said that communism was terrible for every aspect of life for her. people's lives under communism wasn't pretty.#but the art was better. and i feel like it's true for the internet – it was better when it was a free-for-all.#the companies didn't know how to exploit it yet and turn it into a neverending profit-driven hellscape.#people created content because they wanted to. because they wanted to make something silly to make people laugh.#not for profit. not for gain. not for numbers. not to further their career.#i miss the days of newgrounds and youtube before monetisation.#capitalism has soiled everything that's joyful and good in this world.#people should be able to share whatever they want.#people should be able to tell any story they want without the fear of being silenced by advertisers.#that's what made the internet so beautiful before. anyone could do anything and we all had equal footing.#but now we're victims of the algorithm. and it makes me sick.#i'm quitting my job in social media. i'm quitting it. it makes me too depressed. i have an existential crisis every freaking day.#every day i wake up and say "ah. this is the fucking hell we live in#i'm so sorry i feel so passionate about this.#social media is a black hole and it is actively destroying humanity. forget ai. social media is what's doing it.#i miss how beautiful the internet used to be. it should've been a tool for good. but it's corrupt and evil now.#sci speaks
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The best thing about Italy and Europe is that linen just- exists here. I can go buy a shitty cheap 100% linen dress like I would go to Fry's and buy a shitty cheap 100% polyester dress in America. Absolutely revolutionary for my wardrobe. I can't actually buy wardrobe enhancements because I have a carry-on suitcase, but the fact I still have the option is amazing.
#I can't wear polyester because something about my sweat clings to the fibers. I can only wear >60% natural fibers. I've slowly been#weaning all poly out of my wardrobe. The restriction helps a lot preventing impulse buys; but here my impulse buy is only restricted by $$#i am absolutely not crying over the $350 linen women's suit jacket I saw :( UGH it was GORGEOUS and GREEN. I want a linen suit so bad#but honestly it's the kind of thing I should just spend a thousand on and get bespoke I think. It'd look better and feel classier#if you're spending that much money on a thick linen knit in the first place.#Okay tag essay: but can we talk about linen knit fabrics? I've seen so many beautiful linen weaves this weekend I'm losing my mind.#I think there was a kind of Tricot or Bird's Eye knit linen simple-curve dress that blew me away. The amount of work you can do with#two colors and a fashionable knit is insane. Then you wear a jacket over it and the linen is still light enough to wick away sweat but#heavy enough to look fashionable and stay flat. There's really this talented balance of texture that shines in linen. I love linen so much#Anyway! I should've made another post for this but none of these ramblings are important lol#I'm really tired after Anacapri. and dinner. Dinner was kind of dumb. There was confusion about what I wanted. We just wanted#appetizers to share but they gave me a whole plate of octopus. Which I feel bad about eating and don't like the texture after 10 bites.#So I had to give it to dad. Long story short I didn't want to eat anything at all; I wanted to WRITE. But I didn't write. I ate.#I'm already like 10 pounds heavier than when I left lmfao. It's starting to pack on my hips. Damn you Italy!#ptxt
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whenever people say jack and alex dated/g&c is about jalex/etc they're generally joking but i want people to know im being so real when i say that i think jack and alex were together for a brief time
#i've always been deliberately vague about how i feel about this bc i know it's an unpopular opinion#and i know people who genuinely think that certain band members dated have a bad reputation#so like i know i sound insane sometimes#but i kind of don't care anymore#i wanna share my thoughts bc i have so many but so few people share my opinion#and the thing that always gets me is that everyone knows it's there#like if there's enough reason to make jokes about the fact that maybe they dated for a time then why can't it be for real#also i want to make it very clear that i have absolutely nothing against lisa#in fact i genuinely really like her#this isn't me being one of *those* fans#i just honestly think that jack and alex were more than friends during the time alex was separated from lisa#i could write an entire essay on why i think this#(i have done fr)#i promise i'm not just pulling this out of my ass LMAO#jack#jack barakat#alex#alex gaskarth#jalex#all time low
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