#i just recovered from all my exams are you telling me i have to spend my midsession break crying over this fucking dumpster fire

[demigod-of-the-agni]

Me celebrating the end of Nine Realms season 6 in June only to wake up after my exams on September 10 to see that season 7 drops in four days

I know what I'm going to be doing in a week's time

[prisonhannibal]

Do you remember what you were doing when you were fifteen? I remember. When I was fifteen I used to love comic books and drawing and spent a lot of time wondering about what I wanted to be when I grew up and what school to go to. I loved spending time with my friends and going to the library. The genocide has taken all of that from the children of gaza. One day you’re hanging out with friends and doing homework and studying for your future, and the next day all of your books are buried under the remains of your house, your school, your home.

Ibrahim (@ibrahim-family) is only fifteen years old. He has lost access to education, his home, and his safety, and now he has to spend his time trying to fundraise for his family’s safety.

€4,840 out of €10,000 goal

He lives in Gaza with his family, and only a few days ago a bomb near him injured one of his relatives and martyred two others. Every day in Gaza is dangerous, every hour could be the last. No child should have to go through this. Children should be safe enough to worry about exams, not whether or not they’ll wake up to news of more loss. Think of yourself at fifteen, now think of everything you’ve experienced and done since then. Every achievement, every class, the birth of younger cousins, birthdays, weddings. even the small things, like a good meal you’ve had or a movie you watched. that’s what’s being taken from every child martyred in gaza. their whole future, everything they should get the chance to experience and do.

When I asked Ibrahim if there’s anything he wants me to tell everyone in this post, he said that he is very very sad and scared and that he has just lost relatives. Ibrahim has expressed to me more than once that when he goes to bed he’s afraid he won’t wake up in the morning. Even after losing his relatives, he doesn’t have time to grieve in peace, because he’s always in danger himself. It’s not safe for him or his family in Gaza.

Please help Ibrahim and his family be safe. I’m very worried about Ibrahim, because donations have been slow. My heart breaks for him every time he tells me he’s scared. He is so young and has so much life in front of him, he deserves safety. I ask you if you have anything to give, please help bring Ibrahim and his family to safety so that he can rest and recover and go back to school to follow his dreams.

thank you for reading, if you can’t donate please share this post so it may reach people who can ❤️

this fundraiser is vetted by @gazavetters, number 25 on the spreadsheet

@90-ghost @tamamita @dirhwangdaseul @butchniqabi @vampiricvenus @heritageposts @neechees @furiousfinnstan @khanger @autisticmudkip @appsa @strangeauthor @akajustmerry @spaceboytoi @dlxxv-vetted-donations @ibtisams @feluka @toesuckingoctober @sawasawako @fluoresensitive @anneemay

[scientia-rex]

I had one of those days where I just had too many feelings to fit inside my skin, and I’ll have to recover from it.

Telling a patient she has breast cancer. Telling a patient she has dementia. Calling a patient at 6:30pm, still sitting at my desk, because even though I finished seeing patients at 5pm, I have work to do. Doing an endometrial biopsy on a patient who may have cancer. Calling a company so I can get the password to a website so I can recredential every three months so my clinic can charge for my work. Working with an assistant on whom I’ve also done an endometrial biopsy. My regular MA is out with COVID. I’m getting a year-end bonus for the first time in my life. Some idiot kid thinks I don’t know how ears work. I saw back to back ADHD patients; one is a trans woman who paused her transition because she can’t afford it. One is a kid who did loops around the exam room chairs the whole time I talked to his mother. His mother was frosty towards me at first because I was running late because I was telling a patient she had breast cancer, and she was crying, and her daughter was crying, and when her partner died of a different cancer last year the hospice workers were homophobic and she’s afraid of hospice. A different idiot kid thinks I don’t know how soap works. The ADHD kid’s mom warmed up to me when she realized I cared and knew what I was talking about. The kid said, “AHEM. What’s up, chicken butt?” I laughed and high fived him. I gave his mom the Vanderbilt forms to assess ADD symptoms across multiple environments. I saw a patient who had a certain air about her that I recognized intimately, and at the end I asked what she did, and she was a doctor, too. I knew it had to be something like that. When I explain medical concepts I aim for lay language, but I can see when people get faintly impatient with me for it, and I’ll add in more and more technical language and see when they start looking confused; she didn’t. I could watch every new patient take in my brightly-colored hair, combined with the utterly forgettable rest of me, all browns and grays and dress slacks and comfortable shoes, because the hair is my one concession to my deep need for attention; in the exam room, I need to recede into the background so the patient can be the focus. Studies have shown that patients don’t like it when doctors disclose that they have the same medical issues. It might seem like bonding, but it shifts the focus away from where it belongs: the patient. That island of time is theirs. The breast cancer patient’s daughter said to me, “Thank you for spending the time with us. I know you didn’t have the time.” And I said, “From each according to their something or other, to each according to their needs. It’s lukewarm Marxism.” I don’t think she heard it all, or took it all in, which was good. I had a migraine that made my head feel three sizes too big with a steady drumbeat of pain despite taking two Ubrelvy, two Aleve, and two Tylenol, plus 100mg of caffeine and a propranolol and a Zofran. You have to disconnect each patient from the next. I can’t bring the breast cancer patient’s grief and heaviness into a room where a little boy is doing hand-stands and telling me silly puns. One of the nurses brought me a sublingual Toradol from a stash—someone’s purse, somewhere—because she wanted me to feel better, and I felt tears stinging my eyes because she cared about me. I couldn’t afford to cry. I just told a woman she has dementia and she doesn’t believe me. I told her to bring her husband to our next visit. I ended my clinic day doing an endometrial biopsy, trying to pass a uterine sound through a stenotic cervix, but I’ve done this before enough times to know to have the set of dilators ready. I dilated her cervix gently but firmly, with the back pressure of the tenaculum, until I could get the sound in, and then I left the sound there while my assistant handed me the sampling pipelle, because if you remove it there’s a good chance the cervix will tighten down again and you’ll have to repeat the dilation. The patient was holding her husband’s hand and chanting to him under her breath, in pain despite the Xanax I gave her.

I’m a doctor. It’s everything to me.

[inkyquince]

This is a kofi commission for @letstalktea! They sweetly requested Harper being a right little creep over his hermaphrodite reader and a professional letter regarding your health turns very very unprofessional.

content warning. implied somnophilia, medical malpractise, petnames, masturbation, cum stains on the second letter. hermaphrodite reader. dubcon, harper being a nasty. sadly the cum stains on the letter is pretty hard to see.

transcript:

Dear Mx, 

I wished to send a follow up letter after our last appointment that took place last Friday. After your dizzy spell in my office, I am satisfied with the results of the tests we run on you, with your permission. 

The results were quite clear and you will find enclosed the details of the test, but most importantly the medication I wish for you to start taking. You will be required to come in as soon as convenient to pick up the prescription from my office and then the pills from the chemist. You will start noticing the effects around two weeks after taking them and hopefully you will start feeling much better, in more ways than one. 

Sadly there are some side effects that we are more than prepared to help you with. You will notice that your body is more sensitive, especially certain areas, such as your fingers, lips, ears, feet, chest and genitals. You might also notice your libido may increase, or certain areas might swell. We shall talk about it more when  you come in, but all of these side effects are well worth it. 

I will admit that on a more personal level, rather than professional, that you gave me quite the fright collapsing like that. You have lived in this town long enough to know better than to do that by now. I cannot even stress the amount of sleep I would lose if I knew you were out there, liable to faint, be so vulnerable and alone and open for the taking by any man with ill intentions towards you. 

I could barely contain myself seeing you passed out in my office… 

It is as if you are unaware of your own affect on people. I would love to pick your brain about that. Maybe take you in for an examination. Maybe even have you over at my asylum, just for a short stay of course. For your own good. 

Don’t worry, you wouldn’t have to interact with the rest of the patience. Just you and I as you recover and allow me to examine you everyday. Of course we’d make sure that you can happily keep up a routine, and your studies in between the exams. I, of course, will still be busy with the hospital and the other asylum patients, but we both know that if I could, I would spend an overwhelming amount of my time by your side. As your doctor, of course. 

Also I don’t want you to think that any of the tests would be painful, not at all! You’ll be more of a little lab mouse, and we aim not to hurt those little darlings. You’re more delicate, with those big eyes that look so innocently at me even as we both know that your innocence has been long since tarnished. As if you’re trying to make it up to me. As if saying “See, Doctor Harper? Right here for you to dirty up yourself.” Darling thing. You’re a very special patient to me and you use that, don’t you? Trusting me with your vulnerable body and leaning into my touch as I examine you. Sometimes I like to think that you’re just pretending to be asleep, and you’re encouraging me with those spread legs. Allows me to flip up that skirt or tug down those trousers to look at that cute lump in those panties. 

You’re such a rare specimen, how could I ever resist? Not when that cock is so happy to see me. You’re always so stiff the moment I play with it, as if you’re encouraging me. See, Doctor Harper, see? That cunt of yours welcomes me in, the second I start touching it, spreading those lips to admire how you glisten. Always so wet and excited, pussy greedy for anything I can give it over and over and over again. 

Best of all, you’re so relaxed when you leave. You can’t tell at all, can you? The way you’re less stiff, your gait carefree. I know for a fact you left with a smile after I played with your tits. 

You turn me into who I was a long time ago. You always do. No matter where I meet you, just a glimpse of your skin, your lips, your throat, and I’m not better than who I was. It almost makes me wish I was your schoolmate, fingering your helpless pussy in Science. Or better, I ask to take up shifts for the nurse at school and you can spend all your free time in my office, letting me play with your cock as you lay there, begging me to ease your stress. 

The moment you step into the asylum, I don’t think my composure will hold out. You’re my little mouse, scurrying through my halls, my office, my rooms. How would I ever resist you then? I should just strip you bare, but I don’t want anyone else seeing you like that, little cock flaccid between your thighs and nipples hard from the cold air. People can see you when you’re aroused, begging for something to fill you up, but not while you’re vulnerable. All exposed. That’s for me only.  If you want I can stay overnight. I don’t usually but I can only think about seeing how much I can ruin you with the few hours I have. Fill you with cum and jerk that limp cock, barely able to cum anymore. I want you crying for me, from overstimulation and love, my mouse unable to take anymore but I’ll make you. I want you wearing my underwear in our therapy sessions, I want you to want me so much you can’t even wait a full hour before climbing into my lap and kissing me. 

We’re going to need practice. It is humiliating but I want to tell you. The few kisses we’ve shared, I could barely contain myself. Your lips are so soft and it makes me nearly cum each time. Just once I pressed my cockhead against your lips and just watched my precum smear over them, how it slowly dribbled into your mouth, and the way my cum painted your face after just a few strokes? I thought it would calm me, but it just made me hungrier. A taste. 

I can’t do this anymore. I will remain my professional self, I will. Just let me fuck you on my fingers and then my cock. Let me keep you, little mouse. 

Which comes back around to our meeting later. 

We’re going to do a urine test that I wish to personally oversee, just in case you haven’t eaten anything that could interfere with the medication we wish to put you on. There will also be a physical test, also done by me. I can’t wait to see you bare again. Just to make sure you’re physically healthy for our planned regime. 

So, see you tomorrow and maybe pack a bag. 

Remember, if you lose your way, I can send someone to help you make your way over. 

Signed

Harper

Doctor Harper 

Kofi

Patreon

[aticklishpercivalwriter]

Update from Perz!

The quick version: This boy is tired and needs time to recover. Midterms were awful, but the worst of them are done.

Full version: Sorry for no updates. I'm just so drained this week. Statics mentally drained me. I had to end 5 minutes early because I "cheated" since my calculator has the capability to connect to the Internet. I would've gotten an F for the exam, but she's letting it slide as a warning. But my credibility with my prof is shot and any leniency is probably going to be pretty hard to get back. Ugh.

Also, my productivity seems to go down the drain if stuff like midterms come up. I procrastinate which I know is bad, but idk how to get out of it. Any tips you people have?

Last thing, I'm loosing an hour of sleep once the clock strikes 12am. Officially happened 😭. Daylight savings time in the States 😓.

About writing, I'm currently working on a fic. Pairing are lers Hei and Kazu and lees Ae and GamGam. Nicknames for Heizou, Kazuha, Aether, and Gaming respectively. A tickle chase!*

I'll get back to messages and any requests when I feel more in the mood. It's just a lot of priorities. My job interview is coming up this Friday too. Hopefully I can get the summer job 🤞

I hope you all are doing great wherever you are! Happy tickling :)

*More serious things about me below. No need to read if you don't wanna.

*Idk if I should say this. I decided to post it. This was written when I was very sleepy so just know that. Seems like my emotions come out during that time:

I hope you all like the tickling parts in my fics. Ngl, when I read other fics, I feel a bit inferior since a lot of you are very talented in describing scenarios, how the ler tickles the lee, a lee's reactions, and it doesn't feel repetitive and is unique. I tend to overthink and believe that my work isn't that good and I kind of can't bear to work because my brain is mean and tells me that my work isn't going to satisfy you, the readers, even though I get likes, reblogs and nice, encouraging comments, thank you btw ♥️. I usually fall short compared to other people no matter how hard I try. Though, your comments, likes, and reblogs ease my thoughts and bring me more confidence in my work. I just put high expectations on myself, so that's why I spend so long on things to try and make it perfect whether in school or my writing or just anything personal really. Maybe I should cut myself some slack since I'm brand new to the scene? I will not stop writing though because it's a chance for me to express myself and something to indulge in. But yeah, a little something to know about me.

[tera-91]

Wild month ...

I cant believe I went all spooky season without posting.

Well I wrote something and left my computer for a few hours and I don’t know what happened but all that I wrote that morning was just gone.

No, like a silly person I did not save before I left but there was another word doc I had open too that I hadn’t saved but that one was recovered …

Anyway it wasn’t too informative other than I was nervous about what might happened when my manager came back from leave. Honestly it was almost too accurate…

I walked in and my hands almost immediately started to shake with barely a good morning. It took less than an hour for this manager to get grumpy about something that was going on I don’t remember what it was. I could tell the schedule was going to be an issue since this manager kept checking out the next schedule the other manager put out throughout the day. To my *not* shock this manager asked why I wasn’t scheduled outside my availability as far as working in the evening. Not that this manager cared that I was scheduled EVERY day I usually have off or that I had two days off that I typically work due to a thing my sibling and I are going to. Oh no that was not a concern but the fact that I was not scheduled to work the late shift.

The whole time this manager has been gone Ive been putting in job applications either to get a second job or to just have a back up plan if I reach my breaking point again.

Part of me has considered to just quit … again. Once I get into the program I want to at school if the last years schedule is going to be similar to this new year coming up I would be in class the majority of the day 3 days a week. I already work, typically 4 days a week.

The way the schedule currently is, I’m not completely sure how to write it out. So I would have class on at least 2 days I’m typically off of work. I usually work on a day I would have to have class and there’s no switching that class day around so the only way for me to keep the number of hours is for me to work on the third day I typically have off or for me to work a few hours on probably at least 2 of the days that I have class without going beyond the time of day I can work.

Basically I just wouldn’t have a day off between the two at all or if I worked on a day or two I would have class I might have one day a week free. That’s like 50 hours a week just in work and class not including any kind of homework. I think its recommended you spend 2 or 3 hours per credit hour between homework and studying. That’s another like 18 to 30 hours. So that inflates my week to nearly 70 or 80 hours. I know some people do that routinely but still.

I have a difficult enough time just making sure I get assignments in on time and making time to study since I work the day before exams as it is.

I know that is a while away so I don’t think too much about it other than I need to find something else before that happens. Hell with the way the manager made me feel on day 1 of us working together after their return Im like I need to put a heavy foot on the grind to get my side projects done. Just need to get something to the point that I would feel comfortable to not work. The second day wasn’t much better. Getting all huffy and puffy because I am not an octopus and cant do 3 things at the same time. Without going into too much detail I was working on an immediate two part issue that would take less than 2 minutes to resolve since at the time I was already half way done when this manager said no that I was to do something else now. This thing *couldn’t* wait even though there was not an immediate issue with it other than I guess this manager was afraid they were going to inadvertently throw it out since they were going around the place throwing stuff out. I swear this individual asks questions with little to no context but doesn’t give me enough time to even register what they are referring to. That or they want something done and I just got to the point of absolutely not. I mean I think I was asked to do two or three things last shift that the manager ended up asking my coworker to do since I still doing what was previously asked on me. I’m not slow at my job but also when we have so many interruptions and tasks randomly asked of us not immediate to what we are doing. I almost said to just write me a list of the items you want me to complete in the next idk how long was left in the shift but I would get them all done.

Anyway, due to this manager’s task allocations (which in my opinion they give themselves too much busy work or whatever that makes things harder for them that they give out tasks they could more aptly complete) the next shift is more than likely going to start “behind the ball.” Which means I’m going to have to clean it up on my next shift.

This manager is back and with less than a handful of shifts working with this individual I’m back to being a jittery mess. I don’t want to go to work knowing they will be there. I’m practically holding my breath every time they speak. Watching every word I say, I try to joke to make light of the stressful environment, but it just gets thrown back at me. Or waiting to see if im going to be on the end of a conversation that feels like an interrogation. Wondering if they will go off about something. Say something that makes me feel dumb (I’m a bit dyslexic especially with numbers and I haven’t been diagnosed officially but my sibling says I have adhd so I do know I make little mistakes here and there but not anything that someone else doesn’t sometimes do as well). FFS Im up at 4am writing this because I cant sleep and ive been up for over an hour, maybe 2 at this point already. It’s fine since I have the day off as im writing this but still. How many more nights will I sleep maybe 4 or 5 hours before waking up unable to fall back asleep.

I hate to sound like a broken record. Mostly because I tell myself that I will do these things and then procrastinate and not do them. I’m going to do my best to hold myself to it. The only thing I think I can do is, well hopefully not burn out while doing it, but to spend as much time as possible on my side projects. Something. Maybe on my days that I work its just an hour but on the days im off its at least 3 to 5 hours. Spend time writing and editing and recording. Like the days that Im off that I have the mental capacity to it ill write, record and do the creative editing, while on the days that I work ill do the things that are a little less mentally draining like just the audio scrubbing.

[patrywoso]

(Heads up this is long so get comfy)

Hey lovely girl, for starters if you would like to take a break, go ahead! It’s your life and you decide how to live it :) me and the other anons will be here when you return! (Do let us know beforehand though I’m still recovering from the near heart attack I had when I found out u were in the hospital) if you would like, I can try and request more stuff but I’m afraid I only like quite a small group of people haha and my taste is kinda bad.

Hope your dad gets discharged soon darling and you can both enjoy the countryside together. If not, I do hope that you at least take some time off to recharge yourself!

I’m gonna be honest with you the study method varies by the subject and what’s being tested. There are certain ones where I do something very unhealthy called procrastinating. Basically I attempt to cramp all the information into my brain in under 24hs. Is it detrimental to my health? Yes physically and mentally. Does it work? Unfortunately so.

But a more healthy method which I rarely use is to write out everything you need to know and space out the topics each day leading up to your exam. For organisation, I use notion! I find it easier to spend some time at the start of my course to create a notion page that can keep track of all my assignments, exams and any due dates I might have. It’s also helpful as I can link the list of topics tested and see what needs to be done clearly. Additionally, when listing out the topics, I make sure to also indicate how confident I am in doing it/ remembering it while also highlighting which topics seem to be harder than the others. From there I pick what to prioritise and try to space out my study schedule evenly to ensure that I’m not studying hard topics everyday back to back cause I would literally kill myself. I’ve also found it helpful to reindicate my confidence level in the topic after revising it to see if I should take a final glance at it the night before my exam! This is for subjects/exams that require a large amount of topics or information.

Another thing I learnt off one of my classmates back when I was younger was to study smart. Make friends with people in your class, share notes, don’t be afraid to ask for help from the professors and consult them regularly! Additionally, I’ve found that everyone studies differently so what works for me might not work for you! Do take what I’m about to say with a grain of salt.

For starters, none of my study plans really worked in the beginning, so I had to invent my own. Basically, I really enjoy talking/ telling stories so I treated my content heavy subjects as like a giant talking session. I would either talk to my friends and go through the content with them, basically teaching them or I would literally just pretend I’m tutoring my siblings on what I’m studying. Additionally, treating it like a giant gossip session allows me to simplify content into memes or stories that I understand. When I used to study history, I just treated myself as like a newspaper girl spreading the latest gossip in the square lmao. It might not work for u tho but do give it a go!

This is getting kind of long but I do hope it’s helpful to you cause literally no one online helped me for years so I built all this myself haha.

For some methods that have worked on my friends but not me,

They would buy/ use whiteboards to regurgitate all the information they needed to know and draw like huge Mindmaps. This is kinda like my gossip tea spilling method except it’s silent and you look less batshit crazy doing it yourself.

One of my friends just bought notes off our really smart classmate and memorised it. Sometimes u can find free notes online/ for a discounted price so if ur short on notes start there.

My friends and I also use different study apps that lock away distraction apps on ur phone (social media etc) and u can start a timer to see how long u can study in a day. General thoughts on this is that it really isn’t for everyone. It caused me to severely neglect my health as I felt peer pressured to be studying whenever they were studying thus resulting in me not taking breaks. I called it quotes after I pushed myself to study through a fever until I actually started hallucinating my work.

These work for memorisation courses but if for whatever reason your doing things like Math (why??? This subject can burn in hell) you just need to practice. Like learn the formulas then just spend the rest of your time practicing cause this bloody subject isn’t something u can memorise. Hence it does not work well with my procrastination.

Okay this is bloody long, let me know if there’s anything else you would like to know! I’m free to answer any study related questions haha. If u do go back for your masters, that’s great! Cause we should keep on learning. But do remember to take care of yourself in the process and take breaks when necessary. You’re doing great, and that you made it so far you can complete it. Take care, love you xoxo.

Thank you so much sweetheart, i didn't mind a bit it was long cause i found it really interested to know what you do and they way you explain it and i really appreciate it so much, i have the ideas wrote down on my notebook and i will try to kind of practice them with some work related things to see how i feel and if they can help. Thank you so much for taking the time to send it you're the best.

You can always send ideas or anything, you're really good at It so if you have one you want to send do it 😊

I don't think i'm taking a break but if i do i will let you know i promise.

Hope you're having a wonderful day, love you

[fuck-your-proana-blog]

Hey there! Love your blog, I'm really grateful you're sharing your story with us. So, if I want to recover, and I know this sounds like a stupid question but what should I do? Like how should I do it? Idk it's like i'll write in my journal, 'I wanna get better' followed by, 'whatever the hell that means.' I don't quite know where to start.

Thanks, and no that's not a stupid question! Those thoughts are definitely understandable; recovery is foreign when we're disordered so we often don't know where to start. I think it's best to see a doctor as soon as possible- your primary care can do an exam/labs concerning what your ED could have done to your body, and DEFINITELY also seek out the help of a psychiatrist and therapist because they help for sure! Be as honest as possible, because they can only help you if you give them all the information they need to do so.

There are some instances where you will have to be closely medically monitored as you recover since EDs are so damaging to the body- some people also might just do better under medical and psychiatric supervision, so if you need to go inpatient/outpatient at an ED specialist hospital that's something to figure out as well. I would tell you "just stop (insert disordered behavior here)" but sometimes that can shock the body and do a lot of damage as well- refeeding syndrome is no joke so that's why I say see a doctor as soon as possible.

Journaling is a great way to write out your intentions with ED recovery and hold yourself accountable for them in the future, so yes- just writing "I want to/will get better now" can be a great start. Make a list of experiences you want in your life that you can only have if you recover, like celebrating holidays without suffering with ED thoughts/behaviors, traveling, getting an education, dating, making/spending time with friends, just anything you yearn to do that your ED is holding you back from. I do not recommend reading any ED story/ "recovery" books because they often delve into the "I was doing x and y and I was soooo skinny" which can scare us further back into our disorders (no "winter girls" or "wasted," but "how to recover" step-by-step books could help!).

I don't know your age/living situation, but if you're a minor definitely tell a trusted adult that can help get you the medical and mental health care you need. If you're in college/uni you could tell the health clinic there what you're going through and see what they recommend regarding your schooling, because recovery is 100% the most important thing in your life- so if you need to take time off from work/school/etc, arrange for that! Caring for your mind and body ALWAYS comes first!

Whoever you begin to see/have been seeing for mental and physical health will be able to tell you the next steps, as I am not your doctor, don't know your developmental state/age, which disorder you're dealing with/how it's impacted your body and mind, and cannot give that type of advice- but know that I am proud of you for taking this step, realizing your ED is the enemy, and reaching out for advice. Feel free to ask me any other questions, or just come here and vent if you want; I'm never far from the internet and if you have any specific questions I want to do my best to aid anyone who wants my help!

Make sure to check in and let me know how you're doing as you recover; I hope you find your voice, strength, and the outside help you need to start living and ED-free life ASAP!❤️‍🩹

[transboysokka]

How did that relationship with a mutual end?

okay sooo SUPER sorry if they end up finding this (they wont but still) and also im sure they NEVER think about it anymore but like i said this is tragically the only relationship i was in and i was SUPER in love lol

idk how much of this i shared before but im just gonna be super honest about it even if it makes me sound really bad but i was like... 21 at the time? lol

but here's the drama (be careful, it gets a little triggery with like. consent and stuff)

So I fell fast and hard in love, right. High school and college were SUPER rough for me so I think I was just glad to get attention from ANYONE even if it wasnt gonna be a perfect fit???

distance is never easy. from the getgo we lived like 5? hours away from each other and i was the only one driving (way too often) to go see them. i went like every weekend even though i had classes and homework and exams and stuff. My friends were telling me I was so dumb and I was like nooooo it's fine

ALSO okay so they were like in the middle of recovering from a major eating disorder and my friends were also like "hey this is like a bad time for you both to be doing a relationship then?" and i was like NAHHHHHH but also they were super private about it and it like never came up AT ALL and so

their dad made them move home like a month into our relationship so they could continue their recovery (totally fine and normal move right??) but i was like THE INJUSTICE OF IT ALL and so i used a credit card to buy them a flight back over to spend a weekend with me ooooof

even then like there were some issues like it was the first time my friends met them and they were all "nah this sucks" and they were like super disrespectful to my friends and i just laughed it off

this is also the first time consent issues came into play like we LOVED making out lolllll but tbh it was all i was even interested in bc the medication ive been on my whole life kills my libido (this is WAY TMI IM SO SORRY) BUT we were messing around and they decided to give me a huge visible hickey in a place i had sAID i was totally uncool with

but it was totally fine right? because i loved them lollllllll

things were already also kind of weird here bc i was like "uh i think im a boy actually would u still love me" and they were like "i think im a girl actually but also a lesbian" and then we jUST KEPT MAKING OUT????

also they like... made me introduce them to my family??? when i was totally not ready for that and while we both IDed as nonbinary we definitely came across as a lesbian couple which i was NOT prepared to deal with my family about

i introduced them as a friend but they were super touchy and clingy and possessive and my mom was like 'oh so you're dating' and it was actually the worst most embarrassing thing ever

okay i know this is getting long but anyway they went back home again and heres where it gets REALLY spicy

im planning to present at this conference with my mom in another city and it's kind of a huge deal for us. i get a call from [ex] that their dad is going to [I don't remember the word for it but it's when you can legally send someone to a psych hospital against their will because it's for their own good] and MY DUMB ASS was like IT'S OKAY IM GOING TO BUY ANOTHER FLIGHT TO GET YOU OUT OF THE STATE AND COME HERE TO MY CONFERENCE

so lol that happened

we got a hotel that night! uhhhhhhh more MAJOR CONSENT ISSUES and tbh we're both at fault because i could have done a MUCH better job communicating what i was feeling but yeah basically Trauma happened to me

OKAY HERES THE KICKER. I THEN DRIVE THEM SIX HOURS TO ANOTHER CITY to fly out bc that's where they wanted to fly out from????

we said our 'i love you's and 'bye's

they called me THAT NIGHT and said 'hey lets take a break' and i NEVER HEARD FROM THEM AGAIN LMAOOOO

like was that probably the best thing for both of us YEAH but BOY i cried for days and i knew it was because of the sex lolllllll ANYWAY SO THERES THAT STORY

[bleekay]

sorry....... i just need this ok

so a week ago woody got an allergy shot. he's been acting strange for the past week, then the past 2 days has been sick. like. shivering, whimpering, doesn't wanna eat, running hot (altho we dont have anything to check his temp), lethargic, just overall not a happy boy. not feeling good. he seems to be protecting his belly. i start keeping track if he's pooped, he didn't yesterday but did this morning, so no blockage, but the poop was hard so probably has been constipated. but i don't think thats all right. because he's got a lipoma on his right hip/leg, usually squishy soft, and now it's got a little hard spot in it. i'm not freaking out abt cancer because this has happened once before after a rabies vax. the tech that gave him the shot nicked the lipoma and pushed some of the shot into it. made him super sick for like a week but he recovered. his lipoma was hard for like 2 months after that. then it became squishy again. so now, all of a sudden after a shot it's hard again? i'm like. i bet they put the shot in it. like i dont wanna go in guns blazing right. so i call the vets office and im like "hey so do you have on his file what location on his body he got the shot in?" and they say right back leg. i'm like. "yeah. i thought so. the boy hasnt been feeling good and we think its because of this shot being put into his lipoma so could you fit us in today to check up on him" and OUR vet isnt there but another vet is. usually i'd be like. hell no i'll wait for our vet thanks. but like he's not feeling good so i'm like fine whatever. called 8am got an appt for 4:30pm.

he starts feeling a little better today. he ate breakfast, although i made just like. mush out of his wet food, some canned pumpkin, and unsalted chicken broth. he's moving around a bit more. still slow, still careful and lethargic, but visibly better. so i take him in, tell the vet tech what's going on, tell her i'm like pretty certain it was this shot, and maybe some constipation. he's doing a bit better. maybe we could use some pain meds and a tummy med. actual vet comes in and i'm like. immediately feeling off bc i feel like i recognize them. we put woody up for his exam, they spend about 45 seconds palpating him and asking questions, he's clearly uncomfortable and nervous, trying to get away from them and into my arms. they say this moving away from them while they're trying to palpate his back is a sign that he's got back pain and that's the reason for everything. the hunching and tail tucking and shivering and whimpering is cause he's got an issue with his back. guys. he was pulling away from them quite clearly because he did not want a stranger touching him, not because they were touching a sore spot. they fully determined in less than a minute that he has Back Pain and so we should put him on a muscle relaxer and gabapentin. ignored my entire thing about him protecting his belly, about his lipoma getting hard because of the shot, in fact at first argued with me about like "oh they usually give the shot here on this side so they wouldnt have done that" i was like "i literally called and asked where they gave the shot and they pulled up his record and told me it was the right back leg. where his lipoma is." and they were like "well it wouldnt affect him even if it did, it just goes under his skin" like dude you are not listening to me. one week ago we brought him in and he was FINE. and then he got a shot, in the side where his lipoma is, a lipoma which now has a hard spot in it, and he's been sick. do you see the progression??? do you????

vet left the room and i immediately texted my mom about it and she was like "????? he does NOT have back pain what" so im like. no way im gonna buy expensive meds for this problem that he doesn't have. and there was just something. Something. about this vet that instantly reminded me of the vet jessie saw shortly before she died.

ok so. rewind. back to a couple years ago. jessie has been uncoordinated. she's having mobility issues. she's having episodes of twitching, little spasms all over her body. she seems coherent, but uncomfortable and unhappy. we take her to the vet to see what's going on. the vet comes in, does the exam, does a blood draw to run a full panel. this vet tells me they suspect. that jessie has. (wait for it.) back problems. jessie has back problems which are causing all these symptoms. get a call a couple days later from this vet, "everything looks fine on the blood test!" i say "ok great please send me a copy of the report" and they go "oh ok, just so you know, there's one thing off on the panel, the blood sugar is really low, but that's just an artifact, someone left the sample out too long before testing it happens all the time, so there's nothing to worry about"

guys. this is that vet. this is that same vet. i didn't recognize the name, but the face. i recognized the face. i came home to check the records, and it was the same vet telling me today that woody has back problems that told me two years ago that jessie had back problems.

so. with that in mind. jessie died about a month and a half after that vet visit. from severe chronic hypoglycemia. you know. the low blood sugar that showed up on the blood test that was "nothing to worry about."

god i wish i had known i wish so fucking badly i had known to just. ask for another check on her sugar levels. but i didn't. so i kept treating her for nerve issues in her back, potential neurological symptoms, because this vet decided that her blood sugar levels meant nothing on the blood test.

so. you know. did not buy the meds for woody today. do not believe this person even a tiny bit. did my own palpation with his back multiple times with zero indication of any pain response.

i'm. i'm so furious you dont even fucking know. the absolute trauma that was just dug up by me taking my sick dog to see the same vet who absolutely fucked over my other dog by not giving a shit.

like. listen. im fully aware that jessie's issues were not fixable. the emergency vet that we took her to on her last days of life said there was a high probability based on her sugar and insulin levels was that she had an insulinoma, which also likely wouldn't have been operable. shit, even if it were, we would have never been able to afford the surgery or subsequent radiation and chemo. but jesus fucking christ they knew!!! they knew her blood sugar levels were dangerously low on that blood test 6 weeks earlier, and we could have at least mitigated it in the short term, could have made her life a little easier toward the end. could have even. fucking. planned for a gentle euthanasia. instead she had multiple violent terrifying grand mal seizures. i held her in the car through more. by the time we actually got to the er vet my arms were trembling from holding her through ten fucking full body seizures in the car.

im. im crying rn hold on.

the thing is im so so angry that she could have been given a gentle end to her life and she didn't get that. when they called us in to put her down, because she couldn't stop seizing if they didn't have her on a constant IV with sugar, she looked ragged. she looked sick. she was nervous and tired. she wasn't herself. she had lost something through all those seizures.

and now. like. i never expected to see this vet again right. i wasn't gonna ever confront them. its just. happenstance they ended up where i was going. not only was this visit today sucky because i put woody through this for nothing but also. worse fucking throwback in the world. god, idc if they mean well, idc if they're doing their job, they fucking suck and i hate them. and i put so much of the blame for how jessie went out. on this one person. who could have saved jessie so much pain.

today hasn't been great.

oh i’m fuming i’m fuming and laughing what a pointless fucking vet visit

[maybenotmei]

How do you think Malleus and Azul would deal with suggesting to their s/o that they marry one day and s/o does not even hesitate and looks so happy and they say yes?

so you know when exams end and you have this automatic urge to just. flop down on the ground and recover for two weeks because damn was that stressful? yeah . sorry for not responding 💔

also take altered format im too tired

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿♪

first of all, hold on-

wait, he wasn't really formally serious about that butykgettingmarriedtoyousoundslikeadreamtohim so you saying yes without any hesitation....!!!! first that's extremely flattering for azul, second oh my ?:!:?:! you said yes!!???? this isn't even an actual proposal with a ring and all yet this..!!!!

he's actually extremely close to pulling out a marriage contract Right then and there

bonus points if you immediately start giving wedding ideas to him after you said yes. oh he'd absolutely love to discuss that (...he's definitely going to charge some fee for his time even though he loves talking to you...),

+ also does this mean you've been planning this for far long before? i swear his heart is feeling all fuzzy at the thought it's not even funny

pure joy is all this man is feeling right now. thanks

when it comes to dealing with:

1. the 0 hesitation yes

2. how he's feeling,

he doesn't. i'm kidding (sorta), he keeps calm but will freeze a little from your answer. later he will be pacing around his office just thinking about it

yeah it's official in his mind now—he wants to marry you. no scams one-sided beneficial contracts okay...! one day... will you still say yes when that time comes, then?

♪＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

no matter how hard i try, i cannot seem to grasp what malleus's character really is... and since it's 12am and my lovely isn't awake rn to help i am just. basing this off memory. i apologizs

first of all, assuming you're human and not fae,

...what.

okay so first off he will not process that. then he will. and... ohoho you'd like to marry me? and there's his usual smirk. right there. on his face. but he's actually very flattered under that smirk

you. want to. marry. him? wow, he's... that's... sure. he'd like that very much too. thank you. ☺️

...

he's actually planning it right now in front of lilia, sebek, and silver (who are both surprised and not surprised. sebek's actually maybe just a little taken aback because WHAT (same))

cake. cake... maybe can we have something else than whole cakes, maybe..? (i'm cool with spoilers about why his least favorite food is whole cakes btw can you guys tell me....... other spoilers are a no)

but hmm, marriage, to malleus? well even if you two don't get married it's fine with him . he likes how you two are right now either way, so ...

it would be nice to spend some more of his life with you, though.

[daddysfangirls-anime]

Young Aizawa

summary:  my hero academia One shot where Aizawa brings his 3yrs old kid into school and hangs out with 1-A? cute moments with Todoroki and Bakugo?

As Class 1-A stood in formation in front of their teacher the one thing they were all thinking was. Who’s the kid? They could already guess that the child had some relation to Aizawa the dark hair, sleeping bag, and tired ‘I’d rather be sleeping than here’ look. Heck the kid was almost a carbon copy of him the only things telling them apart was their clothes he was decked out in black she looked like a kitty cat rainbow threw up on her.

“Everyone listens up, I’ve got a little class project. Really this is a project for Todoroki and Bakugo but I want the rest of you to assist them if needed.” Bakugo was a bit irritated right now he had planned to spend the day training he hoped whatever this was would go by quickly so he could get on with his training. Todoroki didn’t really care he didn’t have plans for the day.

“As you failed the second half of your pro-hero licensing exam due to your inability to work in teams and interact properly with civilians. This is for you two. This is my three-year-old daughter (Y/n). Your assignment watching her for the day.”

“WHAT?!”

The entire class screamed they were shocked one that Aizawa actually had a child and two that they’d have to be watching her for the day. They had a million and one questions but Aizawa wasn’t up for answering them looking at his daughter he looks her up and down then looks back at the class.

“Good Luck”

And with that Aizawa quickly left before his daughter could fully comprehend what he said or done. While she was trying busy comprehending the class was busying arguing about their teacher dumping a kid on them.

“Everyone calms down, we can handle this” Iida said trying to calm everyone down.

“We?!” Bakugo says “ Aizawa gave her to us we’ll handle the brat the rest of you can go to hell.”

“AAAAHHHHH” Midoriya suddenly screamed rushing to the door. It was then that everyone realized that while they were discussing (Y/n) she walked right out the front door.

“W-where are you going?” Midoriya asks a bit panicked but trying to stay calm.

“Daddy” is all she says as she continues walking down the sidewalk where she thought she saw her father walk off too.

“um... w-well-”

“Oi brat your old man is gone he left you here,” Bakugo says as he takes her hand and leads her back towards the dorms.

“Why?” she asks

“Because he had some important stuff to do, I don’t know.”

“he comes back, right?”

“he better I’m not spending the night taking care of a brat.”

“who’s a brat?”

“you’re the brat”

“oh...sorry “ she pouts.

The females in the classroom were not having this separating (Y/n) from Bakugo they began to scold him for being mean to him. And telling him how he should treat her.

(Y/n) stood off to the side not really knowing what to do. “ He means well he’s just... a bit rough” Todoroki said as he squat down next to her “ do you want a snack?” she nodded. Taking her hand Todoroki led her to the kitchen for some ice cream no one even noticed the departure.

“This is coming much don’t you think” Midoriya said as he sat between (Y/n) and Todoroki eating his own ice cream as they sat on the floor watching Bakugo argue the girls in their class. This had been going on for the last 10 minutes. Just when they thought it was over Bakugo would say something and the argument would start up again.

“Why is he so mean?” (Y/n) asked

““Bakugo isn’t -he’s not....I don’t know” Midoriya said he really couldn’t defend his friend when he was acting like that.

“Enough” Iida said stepping between Bakugo and the females in the classroom. “ we are setting a bad example for Young Aizawa.”

Everyone turned to look at (Y/n) who was sitting on the floor eating ice cream with Midoriya and Todoroki. She was making Todoroki taste her ice cream tell him hers was better than his.

“Sensei has left us in charge of her so we must treat her with the up most care.”

“You’re being a bit dramatic” Denki said a few of them sweat dropping at Iida over exaggerated hand movement, more exaggerated than usually at least.

Ochaco walked over and kneel in front of (Y/n) “ Hi-” Before she could even get a word out Bakugo walked up and pushed her out of the way.

“Oi, what do you want to do?” he asked

She thought for a moment looking at her melting ice cream. “ Sleep”

Everyone sweat drop she was so like her father. With a nod Bakugo left the room a moment later he returned with a sleeping bag “Here” Shoving the last bit of her ice cream in her mouth she takes the sleeping bag and hops in. (Y/n) then flops on the floor and caterpillar crawls until she is underneath the coffee table  where she stops.

The class sweat drops as they hear her light snoring. She’s just like her father.

“Do we just leave her there?” Ojiro asked a bit concerned for the child sleeping under the table in the middle of the room.

“I don’t think that’s safe” Momo says

“Maybe we should move her”Midoriya comments

“OI SHUT THE HELL UP SHE’S SLEEPING” Bakugo shouts he takes a seat on the couch and turns on the TV turning the volume very low. He hears whispers he turns around glaring and growling at them everyone shut up. And for the remainder of the day no one spoke above a whisper.

-

“YO” Mic stepped into the dorms with Aizawa and All Might his shouting was followed up by a book to the face and a very loud ‘SHHHHH’. Everyone pointed to the Coffee table stepping forward Aizawa sees his daughter sleeping underneath the table he sighs.

“How long has she been asleep?” he asks in a whisper Todoroki ignoring Bakugo’s heated glare.

“Since you left. I gave her some ice cream, I hope that’s okay, Bakugo gave her a sleeping bag and she crawled under the table. She’s been asleep ever since. “

“Bakugo has threaten to kill anyone who’s voice goes above a whisper. It’s been pretty quiet.” Denki said Bakugo threw a book at the back of his head. He was too loud.

“Thank you for watching her for the day. I’ll take her now” Aizawa said as sqauted by the table and began to poke his young daughter “ Wake up, sweetheart, time to go home.”

“Daddy no” Shew whined as he pulled her out from underneath the table she cringed at the bright light and pulled the sleeping bag over her eyes.

“Yo mini-Aizawa” Mic said recovering from his assault.

“lower your freaking voice” Bakugo said, very loudly at that.

“I am elder, I am your teacher you should respect me.” Mic said poking Bakugo’s forehead. Bakugo picked up a book and he flinched “ You can’t assault a teacher”

“Then learned to lower your god damn voice. You’re going to wake her up. Teacher or not Who ever wakes her up is dead” Bakugo threaten sending a shiver down Mic’s spine having him retreat behind All Might. Who was just watching the scene unfold.

“Aww, I think young Bakugo has grown a soft spot for Young Aizawa” All Might teased watching a light blushed dusted the boys cheeks. He threw a book but All Might dodged it. With a growl Bakugo stomped off.

“Thank you, again.” Aizawa says pulling (Y/n) out of the sleeping bag and into his arms “ Maybe I’ll let you guys babysit again”

“I thought this was an assignment” Iida said. Aizawa gave him a look that translated to ‘ you actually believed that shit’ before completely ignoring him and waving goodbye and walking out.

It wasn’t until he was a good distance from the dorms that he spoke up.

“What was that? You were suppose to give them a hard time.”

“I’m sorry daddy. They were so nice. Todoroki gave me ice cream. And Bakugo gave him a sleeping bag it was real comfortable. I fell asleep.” (Y/n) said as she looked at her father. Today’s plan was for her to wreck havoc on the dorms and challenge the student you know being a typical brat and messing things up. But (Y/n) was just an angel and couldn’t find it in herself to be a bad girl.

“So precious” Mic gushed

“It’s okay. You did fine. Did you have fine while you were wake at least?”

She thought for a moment tapping her chin cutely “Midoriya cried. Bakugo’s loud but funny. I’m going to marry Todoroki.”

“That’s nice” double take “wait ....What?!”

[gukyi]

in the frosty air | a jjk drabble

summary: two weeks ago you and your roommate slept together. which would be fine, if you knew you both felt the same about each other. but you don’t. and now it’s christmas, and jungkook is still gorgeous and gentle and wonderful and here, and and you don’t really know what to do about that.

{college!au, roommates!au}

pairing: jungkook x reader genre: this is just an angst train tbh, but it has a happy ending! word count: 1.6k warnings: mentions of past alcohol consumption, this centers around everyone’s favorite capitalist holiday, being sad in the wintertime a/n: OHHHHHHHHHH *internet breaks* anyway yeah i’m back baby!!! here’s a little drabble to celebrate because i can’t help myself when it comes to jungkook. love me or we both go down coming soon!

“This Christmas is pretty fucking lame, isn’t it?”

You whip around at the sound of his voice. “Oh, hey. I didn’t hear you come in.”

“I figured,” Jungkook chuckles, bending his head down as he crawls through the open window to join you on the fire escape. The temperature is freezing and the wind is stinging your skin, but it didn’t really feel right to be spending tonight inside. “Saw the window open. Thought you might be here.”

“Yeah. I was probably gonna head inside soon, though.” In the hopes that you would be curled up in your bedroom before Jungkook even got home. Seeing him lately has been hard. “How did your final go?”

“It was alright.” You don’t have to keep looking at him to feel Jungkook taking a seat next to you, crossing his legs over each other as he stares out into the city below you. It snowed a few days ago, and the sidewalks are still covered in that dirty slush that always lingers, wet and cold and black from car tires. Just being beside you makes your heart race, makes your chest tighten. “I was pretty stressed out about it, but then I just sort of remembered that I did my best and that was all I could do, you know?”

“That’s good.” You wish you had that mindset. You spend days studying for an exam and once it’s over, you spend days dwelling on all the things you might have gotten wrong. It’s a philosophy you apply to most aspects of your life. Why you did the thing you did. Why doing the thing you did was the worst thing you could have done. How you will recover from it. If you even will. 

Jungkook sighs. You turn to look at him, just briefly, glance at his side figure, and notice he’s wearing nothing but a giant zip-up hoodie. Isn’t he cold? “It doesn’t really feel like Christmas.”

“Yeah.” You don’t have anything else to say to that. It doesn’t. Which is a damn shame, because you and Jungkook spent the entire beginning of this month turning your tiny, two-bedroom apartment into a winter wonderland. You got a tree to put up next to your TV and decorated with the weirdest ornaments you could find. You hung up those dangly white Christmas lights on the balcony of your fire escape, the ones meant to look like icicles dripping from the metal railing. The radio has been playing nothing but Michael Bublé and Mariah Carey. And yet.

It’s not hard to wonder why this Christmas is such shit. Your spring internship fell through a week ago. Your parents rented a lake house and assumed you wouldn’t be coming with. All of your other friends have gone home already. And Jungkook, perhaps the last person in this whole goddamn city you would have wanted to spend time with, you can’t even bear to look at. 

“How did your finals go?” Jungkook asks, trying to keep the conversation going. 

“They were fine.” At least that torture is over. But living with Jungkook, seeing him every day and knowing that what you have done you can never undo--it’s endless. 

There’s silence. It’s like the two of you simultaneously have no idea and know exactly what to say. Like the words are lingering on the tips of your tongues but your lips are sealed shut. Opening them won’t be like a can of worms. It will be a dam, a waterfall of I’m sorrys and What nows. One week ago, in the heat of the night and in the haze of drink after drink, you and Jungkook made the worst mistake two roommates could ever make. 

“Are you going home this break?” You blurt out the words before you can stop yourself. 

Jungkook sighs. “I’m not sure.”

“It’s okay if you want to.” I get it. I’m not sure if I’d want to hang around and see me either. 

He shrugs. “I just haven’t decided yet.”

He knows that you’re staying. The two of you were so looking forward to spending Christmas together. Now look at you. Jungkook was the perfect roommate. Then everything changed. 

“Okay.” He’s probably just trying to figure out a way to let you down easy. 

Next to you, Jungkook rustles a hand through his pocket. “By the way, uh--I just remembered. I got you something.”

You don’t even have time to object before Jungkook is placing a small fabric box into your open palm, resting on your lap. You look down at the item, at the way your hand seems to envelop it. 

“You didn’t have to--”

“I wanted to.” Jungkook is firm in his response. “Besides, I got it a while ago. Figured now is as good a time as any to give it to you.”

There’s not really anything else to do except open it. Carefully, with trembling fingers, you pull off the lid. Inside sits a dainty silver locket resting amongst a pile of folded tissue paper. You gasp, your breath coming out in smoke in the cold winter air. 

“Oh my God, I--”

“I overheard you talking on the phone saying you wanted one,” Jungkook admits sheepishly. “I wanted to give it to you before I forgot.”

Fingers shaking from the cold, you pull the locket from the box. It dangles from its chain, a delicate little thing, barely the size of a fingerprint. Even on this hazy winter evening, it still catches the light.

For the first time tonight, you look up at him. His eyes are a swirling brown, a deep chocolate. They are unreadable. He offers a small, guarded smile your way, lips pink in the chilly air. “Thank you,” you tell him honestly. This is one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for you. 

You can’t accept this without returning the favor. Wordlessly, you get up from the fire escape, rushing indoors for a moment as you grab your gift from your bedroom. It’s been sitting in there for at least two weeks now. You hold your hand behind your back as you make your way back to the fire escape, sitting down next to him once more. 

With a small flourish, you reveal your own present. They’re drumsticks. 

“For you,” you tell him, that same small grin on your face. “Since you’re always drumming on everything. Thought you could use something to do that with.”

Jungkook looks positively starstruck. He takes the sticks in his hands, feels the wood with his fingers, tracing over the logo at the bottom. You aren’t very well versed in the world of drum equipment, but your friend in the orchestra told you it was a good brand. 

“Wow, Y/N,” he says, mouth agape. “This is... this is the most thoughtful thing anyone’s ever gotten me. Thank you.”

“Always.”

And that’s the truth, isn’t it? No matter what you do, no matter what you say, you will always be there to give Jungkook what he deserves. To make his life just the tiniest bit better. Doing thoughtful things for him has never required effort on your part. There is just a part of you that will do them, because he deserves it. Because he is so gentle, and loving, and kind, and wonderful. 

You sit there for a little while longer, relishing in the brief respite of your gift exchange. It’s softened the ice, warmed the air, broken the tension. Even if only a little. But it’s enough to keep you out here, sitting next to him. It’s enough to keep you from drifting away. 

“I don’t regret that night.”

The words feel like biting wind. 

“What?” You turn to him. 

“I don’t. I’d do it again. A thousand times over.” Jungkook is resolute. He looks at you, eyebrows furrowed in determination. 

“Jungkook, what happened that night--”

“Is something I’ll never forget,” he finishes. “Do you know how fucking long I had been waiting to do that? To hold you? Kiss you? To spend the night with you?”

Each syllable presses deeper into your chest, imprinting themselves on your heart. You stare back at him, too shocked to say anything at all. 

“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same,” Jungkook adds on, quickly backtracking. “I sort of... got that message when I woke up that morning and you were gone. But I just wanted you to know that that night didn’t change anything about how I feel about you.”

Jungkook’s got it all wrong. You were the one who fucked up. You were the one whose feelings won’t change. “I thought you were the one who didn’t feel the same.”

Jungkook chuckles, this sad, forced cough. “Are you kidding? I’d do anything to relive that night. You’re my favorite person in this whole world, Y/N.”

If the weather were just a little bit warmer, if the wind wasn’t as dry, perhaps tears would fall. But instead, you blink back at him and it feels at once like your heart weighs a million pounds and nothing at all. “Me too,” you choke out. “I never want to be without you.”

Your fire escape is barely big enough for one person, let alone two, but that doesn’t stop Jungkook from reaching over and pulling you in, pressing a chilly kiss to your frozen lips, the heat of his mouth warming you up from the inside out. It’s cold tonight, yes. But Jungkook makes you feel like it’s summer all year long. 

You smile against his lips. They feel like home. They taste like peppermint lip balm and coffee and ice. 

“Do you want me to stay?” He asks. As if he was even thinking about going home anyway. 

“Yes,” you whisper back. 

It feels a lot more like Christmas now. 

“Then I’ll stay.”

↳ don’t forget to message me with any thoughts or feedback! i missed you guys!

[lazypeachsoul]

I wouldn't want to spend a minute lovin' anybody else.

Warnings: this fic has some sad moments and mentions of the blip. also kind of AU because I'm completely ignoring Natasha's canon end.

Word count: 4,2k (i got very carried away with this fic)

Summary: · Meeting the right person at the wrong time can be life changing when it doesn’t work out the way we desire. But if it's meant to be it will always happen, right?

A/N: This is my fic for the "Women of Marvel xReader Exchange" created by @marvelxreaderfanfictionfest . It was created for @im-holding-ontoyou and I hope you like it! gif by @natasharomanovgifs 🌼 ALSO; i haven't watched Black Widow yet so I'm sorry if something in this fic doesn't fit the new info we got about natasha.

Masterlist.

To be added to my taglist use this forms or write me an ask!

New York, 2015.

When you received the call from one of your bosses that you had a new case you would have never imagined how big that case would turn out to be.

You had been working for one of the most important law firms in New York for a year now, and you were getting kind of used to reading cases that would be narrated in the papers for months. Rich and entitled men, big divorces were they fight over who gets the yacht, one or two murder cases... if it revolved around the powerful people of New York city, your firm would get it.

When you got to the debriefing and were told that Tony Stark, one of the firm's most important clients, asked your team for assistance in the creation of some legislation with the newly created “Advanced Threat Containment Unit” you were more than surprised.

The events that the Avengers had caused (or saved us from, there were different opinions going around) in the small country of Sokovia were known all around the and it was only time before the most powerful officials asked for the regulation of ‘superhero activity’.

You weren’t important enough to actually attend the meetings that took place with the government, seeing as you had only passed your bar exam a little over a year prior, but you were deemed cheerful and nice enough to act as a nexus between the firm and the client.

For months you spent your days talking to Tony Stark and other members of The Avengers trying to explain what was being talked about. The first few meetings were a disaster, seeing as the mood was somber for the lives lost and nobody really understood your legal jargon. But slowly you started to transform your language and really tried to make the meetings as easy as possible for everyone present.

But who were you kidding, they really didn’t care about the meetings or the silly attorney being sent to explain something that was way above their paycheck. Well, at least Stark was gracious enough to set a coffee station with some pastries for the meeting. You were pouring the hot liquid into your to-go cup when your hand jerked and the hot liquid splashed your hand.

You could feel the sting of the burn but avoided further sudden movements trying not to make it worse. Before you could reach for a napkin to clean up the mess you made, a more dexterous and manicured hand reached for them and exchanged the hot cup in your hand for the bunch of papers.

“Careful, Stark always serves boiling coffee. I think it’s to mask that it’s not the best quality.”

You lifted your gaze from your hand and found a pair of deep green eyes gazing back. You would have thought that spending numerous meetings in the company of superheroes would make you less susceptible to their powerful auras, but being this close to Natasha Romanoff made your heart beat a bit faster.

“Yeah, I found out the hard way.” You joked, lifting your hand a bit. “You would guess one of the richest people in the world would actually serve good coffee...”

Seeing her crack a smile made you feel less tense. Sometimes you forget they are still normal people. Normal people who could kill you with their bare hands and had superhuman powers. She placed your cup on the food table, apparently not bothered by how hot it must have been, and pushed her hand in your direction.

“I’m Natasha Romanoff.” You wrapped your hand around hers and shook it, biting your tongue trying not to tell her of course you knew her name. “Sorry I didn’t introduce myself in earlier meetings, we were all trying to come to terms with what had happened.”

“No worries, I can only imagine how hard it must have been for all of you.” You nodded and tried to show her sympathy, trying to avoid thinking about all the lives affected by the fight. “Oh sorry, I’m-”

Natasha quickly cut you off, speaking your name before you could even say it. You could feel your cheeks get warmer at the idea that they actually knew who you were, and she probably could sense your mood change because she quickly explained.

“I know who you are, you send us at least two emails a week about these meetings and FRIDAY always announces you before you arrive.”

“Who announces me?” You asked curiously at the mention of a name you recognized.

“FRIDAY. It’s the name of Stark’s AI technology. It works all around the tower and it’s there to make life easier for everyone.” She explained pointing around at the speakers strategically placed around the room.

“Oh, I get emails from Friday sometimes. Most of them are asking me to translate or explain something about the debriefing because Mr.Stark is not interested in legal terms.” Both you and Natasha laughed at the thought.

But she quickly recomposed and tried to look serious again when she heard her teammates coming in to get ready for the meeting.

“I wanted to ask you about that. Do you think we could schedule a meeting so that you could explain some things about the legislation of the A.T.C.U.?” She spoke lower than she had when the two of you were alone and you wondered why she didn’t want her colleagues to know about the meeting.

“Ye-Yeah, of course I can.” You were confused but thought it would be in your best interest, and the firm’s, to say yes to the proposal. And a meeting with a very attractive and definitely interesting woman was not something that happened constantly for you.

“Great, thank you.” She smiled warmly and squeezed your hand that you hadn’t even realized was still wrapped around hers from the introduction. “I can promise you better coffee.”

You could only hum in response, still trying to piece together what she might want from the meeting. But your thoughts were quickly cut off when Stark entered the room and you moved to start the reunion.

During the entire meeting you could feel the dull pain in your hand from the scorching coffee and the feeling of a pair of green eyes watching your every move.

Vienna, 2016.

The situation had only gone downhill from the Battle of Sokovia. The public’s opinion on the Avengers was at an all-time-low and that made terrorist groups bold. They knew that if they struck and caused enough chaos, the blame would fall on the good guys that tried to stop them.

The only thing that seemed to be a stable thing in your life was Natasha. Well, as stable as dating a superhero might be. She was busy a lot, but you understood the importance of her job and you were quite busy too gaining importance within the law firm.

And even if sometimes terrorists and criminals got in the way you still found a moment to spend together, wrapped around each other without having to think about how messed up life was.

You thought Lagos was the blow that would make everything tumble, the Sokovia accords were unveiled and it broke the Avengers, and your girlfriend. You could feel how torn she was at her decision of some of her friends to oppose the signing and go on the run, and her own decision to subordinate to the United Nations mandate. But you realized how small that had been when king T’Chaka was killed at the UN.

You had been at the UN as part of the USA legal team that participated in the writing and monitoring of the accords. Your participation in the negotiations almost broke your relationship but you were able to recover once you explained your position and Natasha actually came to an understanding of it.

Natasha was also in Vienna when everything went down, you hadn’t managed to properly see her because she was one of the signers and they sat at the assembly while other guests sat at the amphitheater watching the retransmission.

You hadn’t been able to properly see her all day, seeing as she took a detour before flying to Austria. You were only able to communicate through texts where you tried to make the situation more comfortable for her and she promised a peaceful european trip to celebrate the signing.

When the bomb went off and all hell broke loose the first thing you tried to do was look for her, she was at the epicenter of the explosion and you just wanted to see if she was okay. You saw her from afar when you were being pushed to the outside of the building while they swiped the perimeter.

She sat with T’Challa before he jumped from the bench and stomped away. Natasha looked around and your gazes crossed, immediately melting away some of the worry. You tried to push your way through the crowd to get to her, but police and security didn’t budge.

You never took your eyes off of her, scared that if you did she would disappear. But she did move her gaze to her phone and the look that crossed her face when she heard the voice at the other side told you it was a very important call.

Once the call was over and she looked at you again you knew that would probably be the last time you would see her in some time. You hadn’t known Natasha as long as some of her colleagues had, but you could proudly say you could understand what she wanted to say with just a look. And the look on her face in that moment read close to a goodbye.

New York, 2018.

It had been two years since the fall of Helmut Zemo and part of the Avengers was still on the run. And it maybe wouldn’t have had that big of an impact on you if it wasn’t because Natasha had also been on the run for that long.

You had heard about what happened at the Leipzig airport and how Natasha had changed alliances to join Captain America’s fight. You had been heartbroken at the news knowing that any resemblance of normality that you still hope for was destroyed.

You had spent months wondering what had made her change her mind. Had she thought about your conversations about the accords? Had she even remembered you, waiting for her back in New York, when she decided to go on the run?

A part of you tried to convince you of how selfish thinking about that was, why would she think about you when the future of her team and friends was at stake? But also you were her girlfriend, she should have thought about the implications that might have had for you.

In those years you had mourned your relationship and after the grieving period you tried to rebuild your life. New friends, a new position and new chances to take. And it went okay...at least until someone opened their mouth to talk about superheroes or The Avengers. Years down the line and it was still on people’s minds.

On special occasions you would receive anonymous gifts at your office or your apartment. The first birthday after the war you sobbed for fifteen minutes when you saw the bunch of flowers. There was no name or indicative of who might have sent them, that was until you looked better at the card and saw the small red hourglass painted in the corner.

The gifts continued. Every case you won, promotion, birthday or holiday a bunch of flowers would be delivered to you with the same note.

In a way it gave you a sense of peace knowing she was okay and still thought of you. But the more you thought about it the angrier you got at how she had left you.

You didn’t expect a message from your boss to run to the Avengers compound and assess some situation between Coronel Rhodes and Thaddeus Ross. Although the team had crumbled, your company was still hired to legally represent the remaining members and moderate situations that might arise with the government.

You entered the compound expecting another bureaucratic complaint about their activity but you found a trickier situation. The meeting room was filled with people you thought you would never see again.

Captain Rogers was sitting on one of the chairs sporting a new look that made you almost not recognize him and a tense demeanor. Next to him was Sam Wilson, looking around at the smallest of movements and trying to assess the situation. Wanda Maximoff was standing on the furthest corner of the room playing with her rings, meanwhile Vision was apparently being checked out for a wound. What kind of wounds a synthezoid could get was beyond your understanding.

“Thank you for coming so quickly, I might have angered Secretary Ross during a meeting.” Rhodey came up to you with a nervous smile.

You had gotten closer to him thanks to your job seeing as he was the one doing the dirty superhero work.

“Yeah, I got that much from the text. Nothing new then.” You tried to joke to diffuse the tension in the room. “It would have been nice to know you had guests though.”

“We are not guests. Last time I checked this was our home too.”

That voice made your blood freeze. You should have expected her there, all her friends had returned and the chance of her being back too was almost 100%. But hearing her voice again after two years was not something you expected.

You bit your tongue before you could talk about how it’s not a home if you abandon it, but decided against it. This was a fight between them, not Natasha and you.

“I need you to work with the government to avoid this situation becoming a disaster.” Rhodey explained and you scoffed.

“Rhodey, I’m a lawyer not a politician. I have as much power in this as you might have.” You tried to lay your point across but it was difficult with all eyes on the interaction. “Hell, I have even less power than you do.”

“Then I need you to distract them enough to get them off our shoulders.” He pressed. “Something big is coming and we need all the strength we can get.”

You thought about it for a moment. If it was true that something big was coming, the Avengers were the best option to fight it.

“I’m in.” You scoffed at his smile and sat down in one of the chairs of the meeting room. “I’m not ready for the world to end yet.”

The meeting went on for a while. You called bosses, government officials and everyone that would listen to your distractions. You sent emails that would flood their inboxes for days so that they couldn’t read any news that might reach them about what the superheroes had in mind.

It was late at night when a cup of steaming liquid was placed next to you. You looked at it and saw that it was some kind of herbal tea, probably made to relax the drinker. You followed the hand that was still holding the mug until you reached Natasha’s face.

You had done your best to ignore her looming presence in the room but now there was no distraction. Looking at her you could see tiredness in her face. She was platinum blonde now, a look that weirdly suited her, but her face still looked as welcoming to you as it always did.

You tried to stop the flashbacks to the last time you saw it in person in Vienna, but they kept replaying in your head until her voice broke you out of the loop.

“I thought you might need it, I remember how nervous calls used to make you.”

She was smiling but you could tell it didn’t reach her eyes.

“Yeah, I guess I got over it since I got my promotion. Now I spend a long portion of my day making calls.”

She hummed and sat down next two you, but leaving a chair in between you as a safe space.

“I read about it in an article, I sent you flowers to celebrate.”

“I got them. And the Christmas ones. On my birthday too.” You enumerated the times you had gotten the plants in the past two years. “You must have spent an awful amount of money buying me so many flowers.”

“You deserved it, you still do.” She shrugged and that’s when you noticed she had her own mug of warm tea in her other hand. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to celebrate with you.”

You laughed into your mug sarcastically. Out of everything you expected her to say this wasn’t one of them.

“Did you really? Because you didn’t seem to consider me much when you went on the run for two years.”

Natasha paled when she heard your tone. She probably wasn’t used to situations like these but you weren’t going to let her go without an apology at least.

“I was trying to do the best for-”

“-for the world. I get it, Natasha, I do.” You tried to contain your emotions but it was getting harder with every word. “Relationships are supposed to be teamwork. I know you are always too busy playing heroes and I never judged you for that, I just wish you would have trusted me enough to tell me before you disappeared.”

She was silent and knowing Natasha it’s because she was probably overwhelmed with the display of feelings. But she needed to hear how bad you had felt.

After minutes of waiting for an answer from her and getting nothing but sighs you shook your head and looked back at the computer screen.

“I guess it was a case of the right person, wrong time.” You shrugged trying to find distraction in the flurry of letters in your email inbox. “Or at least it was for me.”

She got up from her seat without a word and you grew exasperated. Why had she even approached you if then she wasn’t willing to have an adult, two sided conversation? She was almost at the door when you heard her voice again.

“Please never doubt how much I love you. I made some bad choices but dating you was not one of them.”

New York, 2024.

Time apparently flies by when you are erased from the face of the earth. One day you are in your office working late and the next you appear five years in the future with no recollection of what might have happened.

You were taken by authorities to impromptu camps and one by one examined to check your identities. The entire thing seemed to be something out of one of the dystopian novels you used to read as a teenager.

When it was your turn you gave them all the information you had on what had happened. You had given them your name and personal information and apparently had been a very searched person because the computer started beeping as soon as your name was introduced in the database.

You were moved to a secluded part of the camp and kept in an isolated room for god knows how long. Your stomach was in knots during the entire situation and you could feel the cold sweat on you. That mixed with the metallic taste on your tongue you knew this time your anxiety was justified. You were almost dizzy because of how hard you were thinking about the entire situation and trying to make sense of it.

When you heard the door of the room open you jumped up, discarding on the floor a makeshift blanket that had been placed on your shoulders when you got there. Your legs almost gave out at the movement and your heart felt like it was going to burst out.

The door opened enough for you to see who had been searching for you. Natasha stepped through the door still dressed in her tactic gear and with tiredness written all over her face. But that feeling seemed to almost disappear when she finally saw you.

With quick movements she stepped into the room and wrapped her arms around you tightly. For some reason that action was the trigger that you needed to let all your emotions consume you.

You started sobbing uncontrollably at the unknown. You didn’t understand what happened or how you are here, but feeling her embrace helped you feel safe in a way. It had been years since you last hugged her but it still felt as good as back in 2015.

You could hear Natasha’s soothing shushes in between your sobs and you moved to hold her tighter.

“You are here. I can’t believe I found you again.” She spoke softly and you didn’t know if she was speaking to you or herself. “It’s okay darling. I’m here and I’m not letting you go again. I promise.”

And with that promise a ray of hope made way between all the fear you felt.

Missouri, 2025.

Soft music could be heard all around the ground floor of the house. The soft beat was upbeat enough to get the morning started but not enough to be overwhelming if you had just woken up. You were sitting on the kitchen island looking at the news on your phone and having breakfast.

Mornings were usually very calm around the homestead and you couldn’ be more thankful for that. It allowed you to silently prepare your breakfast and coffee and get a headstart on Natasha’s breakfast too.

Since she had retired, Natasha had discovered a newfound love for sleeping in and you didn’t dare to take that away from her. She deserved it from all the work she had done in her life.

You, meanwhile, tried to get up early to scroll through the cases that you got in your new and smaller job and schedule meetings or emails.

It was a Saturday so work wasn’t a thing and you could actually enjoy your toast and coffee in peace. Or at least until a pair of arms wrapped themselves around your middle and pulled you back against Natasha.

“Good morning baby, how did you sleep?”

“Like a baby.” You could feel her smile when she kissed your cheek from behind. “You weren’t there when I woke up though.”

You shrugged before moving to get a bite out of your toast. Natasha tried to do the same but you quickly moved it away from her with a smile. She tried again and you moved as fast as your reflexes allowed you.

“C’mon baby, give me a bite” “No, it’s my toast. You can make your own.” “But it tastes better when you make it.” “No it doesn’t, don’t be lazy.”

The playful fight continued for a few moments until she got close enough to get a small bit but you moved it again.

“Don’t make me bite you, darling.”

You chuckled at her threat and plopped the remaining toast on the plate in front of you. Breakfast didn’t matter much anymore. You threw yourself into her arms and pressed your lips against hers. It wasn’t a slow and sensual kiss, it was closer to how small kids smooch their parents. But you knew it would convey your love more deeply.

“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Nat.” You spoke against her lips and squaked when you felt her playfully nip at your bottom lip.

“Is now a good time?”

That question had become recurring in your household, a nod to the phrase you said when you found eachother again after being separated the first time.

“I couldn’t think of a more perfect time.”

And you couldn’t. The rest of your life spent in a homestead with your girlfriend and whatever life might bring? It sounded absolutely delightful.

Taglist: @tagehaya @flyforeverfree @rooskaya-yelena @evalynanne @insanitybyanothername @princessayveke @yelenabelovasgf @kyli314

[bulletnotestudies]

✨ how to deal with failure: a brief guide for the completely done and utterly fed up student ✨

first of all, recognise - and i don’t mean just read, internalise it - that failing is okay. you’re not dumb, you’re not unworthy of taking the class, you might’ve not even necessarily had the wrong approach; you did, however, in any case, have bad luck. and that can be changed. it absolutely can be changed and you do have the time to adjust your studying so you can make up for the misstep. it’s gon be okay buttercup <3

1. vent to a friend/sb you’re close with

i personally attacked my bestie, talked to a few other ppl, and it helped get some of the frustration out. it’s also important you learn to speak to yourself how you would to a friend - you certainly wouldn’t tell them they’re a failure and won’t come back from this, would you? what you actively tell yourself shapes your subconscious thoughts.

2. catch up on the self care you’ve neglected when studying

get a long shower to wash the exam off, eat your meals slowly, get enough sleep (!), clean your room (unburden The Chair™ - srsly, do your laundry - and vacuum, change your bedsheets perhaps?)

3. make a study plan for the retake

be sure to make it realistic and flexible so you don’t end up inducing more stress (helpful posts: 1 2 3 4 (not mine)), try to finish all the topics at least 3 days before the exam so you can spend the last days refreshing your knowledge and preparing mentally instead of cramming.

4. reflect (critically) on your studying so far

is there anything you can do to get more out of your time? quality over quantity is super important when it comes to revision; try implementing more active recall into your study sessions (some posts you can consult on this topic: 1 2 3 (not mine), what is active recall?) and spacing them out more; try to avoid cramming as it increases your stress levels and isn’t as affective with committing information to memory. also, if you asses you could use some help, reach out! ask a friend, get in touch with your professor, seek advice online… getting help = showing readiness for improvement = mature and very welcome!

5. schedule self-care time

when you’re making your study plan, remember to also think of your mental and physical health ● you can space out little acts of self care throughout the week (i.e. take a bubble bath every sunday, schedule a weekly video call with your best friend, allot time to spend with your s/o, do a quick workout every day,…) ● or have a ‘mental health day’ for a whole day each week (i.e. on saturdays, only do things you enjoy - spend the day reading/drawing/binging netflix/baking/…); i personally like to space my self care throughout the week and go for a walk with my best friend every two weeks or so. i’m not kidding, schedule your ‘me’ time into your planner. write. it. down.

6. sleep

i’ve mentioned it already but it’s so important it deserves it’s own bullet point - remember to also take good care of your brain. it is, after all, the organ working the hardest here. a whole day of studying, doing chores, talking to people, etc. has your synapses firing away like crazy, so sleeping is vital for them to recover and come back stronger the next day. give them time to cool down, process the information you’ve gathered throughout the day and store it somewhere you can access it later. seriously. an important note here: there isn’t a single amount of sleep that is optimal for everyone - some people work best on 6 hours of sleep, some can’t go on less than 9. dedicate yourself to figuring out what works best for you and learn to plan your wake up time. ● option no. 1: get into the habit of going to sleep and waking up every. day. at. the. same. time. - a good routine is even more vital in these times when time doesn’t even matter bc we literally don’t go anywhere ever. ● option no. 2: if your uni/work schedule doesn’t allow you to establish a daily routine, try using sleepyti.me to calculate when you should wake up to feel most refreshed :)

hopefully these points can serve as a base/reference for your academic rebound <3 i wrote them up after straight up skipping the grieving-this-is-unfair phase of failure and just being left with a slightly-pissed-but-definitely-fed-up-with-this-class feeling. it dawned on me that i surely can’t be the only one facing this, so i decided to share this and hopefully help you guys out as well:) keep in mind: your worth has zero correlation with your grades, you’re a bad bitch and will not stop bc life tried to knock u down - here’s a quote i like: when life knocks you down, calmly get back up and very politely say, “you hit like a bitch”. after that, u can follow these steps and flourish x

[elius-learns-to-write]

Class Drama and Anger Issues

Hey besties this will contain swearing, violence, catcalling/ sexual harassment, blood and just horrible behaviour so please take care reading this, love you all <3

You had always been very protective of your friends

It wasn’t like you didn’t think they could stand up for themselves

You understood that 100%

However whenever anyone insulted them or talked bad about them you were the first person to throw hands

You were sure that your jaw had locked from how long you had been tensing it. You see, being sat at the back of the classroom was great, you could see everyone and hear everyone. Which means that whenever someone decided to bitch and moan about the people in the little group you had managed to join, that you would be the first person to hear it. Like right now for example, Liz and Peter had broken up a few days ago and she didn’t take it so well and had taken up talking about him behind his back. Which had led us to this: you at the back of the room, fists and jaw clenched in an effort to not walk over to her and her little friends and wipe that smug look right off her face. “And he isn’t even that smart, God knows how he got into Stark industries” nope that was it, that was the last straw. You pushed the stupid science lab chair back so hard it fell to the ground, heads turned to you as you stormed over to where Liz and her group where currently at which just happened to be at the front of the classroom. God, were you lucky that the teacher had left to go grab some more textbooks from some cupboard down the hall, otherwise you would have been dead when you said “Listen Liz. Peter is an amazing and smart boy who cares more for others than he does himself. He works harder than anyone else I know and he still manages to make sure others are okay. He is twice the person you will ever be and if you don't shut up in the next 2 minutes you won’t have to worry about being bitter over a breakup, you’ll be too worried about getting a set of new teeth”. If this was a cartoon steam would be pouring from your ears and your face would be blood red, which wasn’t too far from what you looked like now. Peter had taken a sick day and thank god he had, otherwise he would have killed you for even saying anything, however Ned was still here and he was waiting to see how far you would go before having to step in and calm you down. “Oh how sweet L/n, you think you’re all strong and scary” her and her friends' sickly sweet laughs echoed in your ears as you clenched your fists even harder. “Y/n come on Peter wouldn’t want this” ned tried to reason and even in your rage filled stupor you realised he was right and took a breath to try and calm yourself down “say anything again and you’ll see just how strong and scary I can be” you spat, stroming away, grabbing your bag and walking out of the room just in time for your teacher to walk back in, “where’s L/n?” he asked. 

Okay maybe you did tend to overreact 

You just really cared about your friends

They were there when you needed them and you wanted to do the same 

You couldn’t help it that you got angry when people decided to talk about them 

In some situations though it was acceptable to get angry

You, Mj and Betty had been coming back from the Cinema late one night after deciding that you deserved to spend some time together after exam week to treat yourselves. Unfortunately walking through the streets at 10pm meant getting some very unwanted attention from older men. “Hey mama looking good” one man slurred as you walked past him grabbing the girls hands a little tighter in an attempt to ground yourself and reassure them that you would keep them save, “hey don’t be like that, we just want to talk” another man added, honestly what was it with them? Couldn’t they see you obviously didn’t want to “talk” to them. You hadn’t even realised your feet had stopped moving until Betty gently placed her hand on your shoulder and whispered “It’s fine just let it go” and tried to give you a nudge in the direction you had originally been going. “Hey! Don’t just ignore us! We know you want some attention” you didn’t know who had said it and at this point you didn’t care, worrying more about teaching them a thing called respect than about who voiced their unwanted thoughts. Letting go of your friends hands, turning around slowly and walking towards the men with a smile on your face so sweet it was almost scary. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you that women aren’t your submissive little toys?” you sung punctuating your sentence with a kick to one guy's nuts and a punch to the other's nose. “Because someone really should” and as the men were recovering from your atack you stalked away along the dimly lit street and continuing your journey to Mj’s house.

Okay so we have clearly established your hatred towards people who disrespect your friends 

The Avengers new about your strong feelings and respected the fire that you had 

Of course they did have Bruce try and teach you some breathing exercises 

Spoiler alert they didn’t help very much 

So when Bucky got a call from your school telling him that he would have to pick you up as you were suspended for a week

He couldn’t say he was surprised

“I’m going to pick Y/n up from school, be back in a bit” Bucky called to the rest of the team who had been watching some sort of reality show on the new Tv Tony had no reason to buy but did, “why? What happened?” Steve replied, a look of concern on his face “They got into a fight and so they are suspended for a week” the supersoldier sighed, grabbing the car keys and whispering “what did you do this time Y/n” to himself.

I’ll tell you what happened

You had been on your way to English when you had seen Flash taunting Mj, waving her book above his head and laughing hysterically about something. Instantly you dropped your bag to the floor and stormed over to them “Hey Flash, what are you doing there buddy?” you shouted loud enough to seem intimidating but not loud enough to capture the attention of the teachers and students who were already in class. “None of your business Y/n, move along” he spat back, if looks could kill he would be six feet under and halfway to hell as you ripped the book from his grasp and slammed him into the lockers “really? Because to me it looks like you’re being rude to my good friend Mj and I don’t take that very lightly”. Gripping him by the collar and pushing him even further into the lockers that he was sure his body had made a dent in the metal, however flash was never one to give up like the shaking leaf of a man he was. Pushing you hands off and shoving you by your shoulders he said “aww look Mj your angry little guard dog has come to your rescue again. How sweet” if there was one thing you hated more than stupid boys and disrespect it was being called a dog. You weren’t gonna let him call you that. Quicker than he could say “Don’t hit me” your fist came flying straight into the boy's noise, a satisfying crunch being made upon impact. Now throughout all of this no one had heard the commotion and they wouldn’t have if Flash didn’t scream out in pain and then faint at the sight of his own blood.

That’s how you ended up getting suspended 

It was what you had told your dad when he picked you up because you had no reason to lie

No matter how proud of you he was he still gave you a talking to 

You both had a long talk about how best to go about controlling your anger and instead of going back to Bruce you decided to take a few anger management classes

And so far it’s going great

(Until flash decides to open his mouth again)