#i just need a good kick in the ass
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god i fucking love yoghurt
#[ooc]#this has basically turned into a normal blog by now#eheh...#im sorry i'll start roleplaying again soon i promise#i just need a good kick in the ass#[joy]#[yami]
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boo! old woman jumpscare
greyscale vers below!
#marshdoodles#isat#in stars and time#cw drinking#cw blood#<- just to be safe#people really seemed to like my odile hurt sprite redraw huh 😊😊😊😊#im so glad 😊😊😊#that redraw in particular kicked my ASS btw#ohhh my god why did i decide to change the pose. i think it turned out really good tho so w#also slipped in some personal hcs for how craft would look in color? i need to explore those ideas more#they don’t really translate too well with odile’s craft style#anyways!!! odile!!! she’s so much more fun to draw than i expected#i love drawing her hair so much… so shaped…#did have to adjust her palette a little tho (i think i only changed the book color and the gems)#overall just really happy with my design for her teehees#enjoy the old woman I Suppose
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made some new ones 👀
#disability#chronic pain#fibromyalgia#mobility aid#autism#actually autistic#cane user#autistic#actuallyautistic#no spoons only knives#i forgot that the day changes after midnight 🤦♂️#executive dysfunction kicked my ass today so i had to pay extra for one-day printing to be done friday#but everything i need printed has been sent to print so 🎉#now i just need to paint about 30 canvasses and magnets#i am not good at managing my time
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There's a disabled angel in good omens 🥺
#listen im only in episode two and i know there's some drama going down but im focusing on this lol#i love that not only do they show the angel using a wheelchair and being ambulatory#but they also visibly show them miracling innaccessibility issues so that they Can still use the chair#instead of just getting rid of the disability#part of my is conflicted bc im like... there's disabilities in heaven? and that makes Me sad bc my disability is hell and painful as fuck#But getting rid of disability in fantasy is eugenist crap and showing that god made a disabled angel is a net good thing#while it personally makes me sad to think if there was a heaven i could still be in pain all the time#not all disabilites are bad and need to be cured we're a wide spectrum and we've been fighting for disabled rep esp in fantasy for ages#it's objectively good my personal feelings about my own disability aside#part of me thinks it's cliche to say 'you were made perfect' bc they're an angel But it's not we literally havent had this type of rep lol#anyways it made me happy to see#and im so glad it's a power chair user that's ambulatory it's important for abled ppl to see that#anyways y'all keep your drama and spoilers off my post im not far in and im only talking about this shoo#oh also!! love the fantasy hover chair they use in heaven specifically too i wish we had that it kicks ass#p
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hahaha wheee haha
#sk8 the infinity#kyan reki#hasegawa langa#renga#continuing to tag ship instead of answering any of the reporters' questions#as you can see. I am still on my Reki Speaks English Pretty Fluently But Can Not Read It For Shit bullshit#and also. teen shenanigans. which can also be grown up shenanigans if ur not a square#man. todays been a Whole thing. how was it really the case that every art supply store I went to ran out of black ink#three! I went to three stores! literally a triangle in the city!#still have some of the devils tar left but I'm not enthusiastic about it#well! that's for future baku to care about and for me to ignore babeyy#tbh this is like. Im just glad I can still scribble a funny comic when it strikes me it's been too long#I don't do that a lot anymore... even tho its such a good measure of like. ur sense of timing#if u can draw a funny comic ur powerful enough to do anything. u can eat the sun u can kick its ass. u can draw a sad comic too#I realized I missed that...#also accidentally sent this from draft without adding tags lol. and tried adding tags on mobile and it spit in my face and called me a bitch#got enough of that. one must never forget one's currently on tumblr#now I sleep. gods. gods do I need a bit of that#have a good night lads. bring a worm onto a rollercoaster. see what happens
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If it isn't my beloved celestial harpy, most holy Michael the Archangel herself (meaning, I turned this into proper line-art). ⚔ Good Omens has insulted her, but she will always be Supreme Commander of the Heavenly Host in my mind, and in my fics. I can only try to do her justice.
What do you think, should I colour it? It almost looks like a colouring page, I'm tempted to print it, and colour it with pencils or markers. ✏
#good omens#good omens michael#good omens fanart#good omens fandom#archangel michael#sketchbook#digital art#digital drawing#my art#my artwork#my fanart#line art#she's so hot what the actual heaven#i certainly do her more justice than the good omens creators#it's how she should've looked#supreme commander is what she should've been not gabriel and certainly not the fat principality#well they are wrong i'm right she IS the leader all you need to do is look at my fics#she's actually a character in most my ideas regardless if she's in a main pairing or not#i am... drawing this instead of writing those mentioned mostly still unpublished fics#she actually looks a bit like my male michael tends to since he has a handsome and sharp but slightly feminine face#but she's a raging lesbian he's completely straight#this stealer of pregnant demons#go and kick ass my love#just not your brother's i love him too#you and him are on the same side politically#he's the only man she ever sleeps with in my fics and only to conceive the new antichrist 🤣#the relationship between her and maxine is everything to me i'm so mad the fic where michael's max's mom isn't published yet#the way i portray her in general is everything to me - she somehow manages to be both righteous and machiavellian she's everything#she's a b*tch but you can't not love her#she has a pathological need to protect
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the way the ericson group were at the outbreak just a bunch of troubled kids who made various mistakes or committed crimes and were judged by a system that punished and abandoned them instead of giving them the support and love they needed, are then nearly a decade later put into a situation where now they must judge a troubled child for the mistakes and crimes hes committed against them. and 5 to 3 vote them out 😭
#twdg#i love the way s4 connects back to lees whole 'murderer' thing back in s1 😭 guilt...atonement.....systems of punishment#i love thinking about s1>s4 themes and crying#anyway this is partially why i hate when i see the ericson cast reduced down to 'just some teens' its so much more than that#them being abandoned in a boarding school for troubled kids is SO IMPORTANT its not 'just some school'#anyway its also probably why theyre my favorite cast#theyre literally one of if not the most mature group of the series even while being a bunch of kids who make choices i dont agree with#because they actually love and care about each other. even when theyre mad. because theyre all they have left#i do think the vote was a fair way to handle it even tho i still ultimately find it cruel. they couldve talked it out#but this is still a story that needs conflict to resolve so is what it is#they would rather they leave than have to face their confused feelings. the most immature thing they do. but understandable#they did such a good job crafting that cast for clem GOD an entire ensemble built around her and aj....delicious#zombie/post apoc media about love and community my beloved 😭#sorry but get tf out of here with that 'humans are evil and everyone dies' lame ass bullshit we are nothing without community#the amount of love pouring out of s4 is like getting my ass kicked but then they give me a big hug and kiss after and send me on my way#s4 my absolute beloved i really love it more and more every time. so much to appreciate even with it the way it is#the themes bro the themes........ the connections between seasons 1 and 4 you are everything to me#it speaks
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I'm always thinking of dragons so like I'm gonna ramble for a minute
Sometimes I think HYPOTHETICALLY about what other movies could be made in the animated franchise (i don't know if i actually want this - the dreaded reboot movie coming out makes me wonder if they will crank more though, and what I would be comfortable with) ***if it didn't suck!!
prequel wise; I used to always think Stoick and many agreed and I love him so much but tbh... we know so much of his life already from the movies and the shows alone. His greatest lifelong tragedies have already been showcased onscreen - and tragedy makes for great conflict and great cinema. His largest character transformation happens already in movie 1, how else could he be challenged again? It would have to be creative, not to completely close the door on him, just a point made.
It occurred to me that the richest unseen backstory is actually probably Toothless. He can't talk - we don't know where he came from, only that he is the last of his kind - and that's fucking sad as hell. Also BABY TOOTHLESS. Butts in seats immediately, merchandise stonks soaring. He is undeniably the most popular character and there can be NO httyd movie without him. Idk it would be *dragon noises* for like an entire movie though lmfao.
I think the most obvious move is sequeling it, movie 4, doing hiccstird and hiccstrid babies + Toothless and his babies, protecting the hidden world part 2. But it would have to be like extremely compelling and exciting for me to be onboard. IDK LIKE let's be crazy, what if they thrifted the tossed idea that Drago didn't die and redeems himself. What if it's like .2 seconds after the third movie ends, one of Hiccup's kids falls and gets lost in the hidden world while they're saying goodbye, let's say the tiny one, and Hiccstrid have a meltdown searching for him assuming he's been eaten, and out he comes holding hands with Drago, who rescued him from certain death. He's been hiding down there for years (had to do a lot of thinking after he got his ass handed to him in public by a 20 year old) and appreciates dragons now. And Hiccup's brain like implodes because the guy who killed his dad just saved his son. AND he's living in the place he initially wanted to live in too. The DRAMA, NOW WHAT oh damn I need it now I guess
#httyd#hiccstrid#don't listen to me lmfao i'm just thinking out loud#i have dreams there's a httyd 4 ALL. THE TIME. and it's always like so good it makes me cry#i literally wake up crying#and of course I NEVER FUCKING REMEMBER FOR THE LIFE OF ME what actually happened in it#also i can't lie okay. i can't lie#i love those cute af babies#i'd LOVE to see older hiccstrid kicking ASS#BUT i gotta walk away from the ledge. it could absolutely be so lame. more likely in fact#idk.#i also just need more eret so#whichever one gets him in it that’s fair
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listen I'm not gonna be a Curly apologist he did Fucked Up as captain but I genuinely recommend ppl watch a playthru that goes thru the game in chronological order. It kinda helps clear up the events and gaps between them, bc even tho u See the times, you still experience it out of order.
The stuff Anya says definitely sets off alarm bells but it doesn't seem like he Fully Understands what she means, and I'm going to be 100% honest I think she was trying to repress it herself. This isn't to say that she is AT ALL "at fault" for what happened after and she should've gotten help even if she wasn't ready to fully discuss the issue but I genuinely think she herself was still coming to terms with things, so she didn't necessarily process the full impact before talking to Curly, and a lot of what happens occurs after they're laid off- like this delves into personal interpretation but I genuinely think Anya only registered Jimmy as a serious danger after his outburst towards Curly. Ofc my interpretation is limited bc of the limited pov in game and not having gone through what she has, but it personally reads more akin to coercion over time than a singular Obviously Violent incident (like. Not to say that Sexual Assault isnt violent in nature, just that coercion often specifically works to obfuscate the fact it is a form of violence.) The layoff is a Massive catalyst for her bc of Jimmy, in that she now has a very clear understanding of his capacity for aggression.
To extrapolate a little from the "Dead Pixel" conversation, she starts by saying she Likes The Screen (even though it's fake). While Curly has his quotes about the pixel "not ruining the illusion" which. Y'know is Symbolic Of His Flaws. She doesn't say the pixel ruins it, just that she can't get it out of her mind.
If we take the pixel to represent her Or jimmy, either way the way she talks about it kind of downplays things, like it's a Minor Thing that's Slightly Upsetting, but she's still okay with the big picture. Idk I could be 100% wrong but that is my take
Besides that, Anya tells curly she's pregnant 2 days before the crash, and it isn't until she outright states it that he starts Putting The Pieces Together. I want to note, he says "I'd do anything" and "this doesn't have to go on our performance evals" 1. Before he knows shes pregnant 2. Under the assumption she might attempt suicide, and I doubt he even thought about her using the gun on anyone else before she brings that up. He says literally before the line where she tells him she's pregnant that "being laid off isnt a reason to hurt [herself]". Like I've seen ppl talk about the performance evaluation thing like it's about her and jimmy, but I think he's referring to (his belief) that she might attempt suicide or similar which might genuinely be a consistent thing he's seen her struggle with, given she's able to go through with it. Also just to note: assuming their society is like ours (hellish) reassuring her he won't blab Abt her mental health is like. Genuine reassurance- lots of mentally ill ppl will Not Open Up bc it could have long term consequences (like. For example. On employment) ANYWAYS I hope it doesn't come off like "Curly never failed Anya" but rather "Curly approached this specific situation without the context of why Anya is panicking and (possibly validly) assuming she's dealing with a very different issue"
Also let me say again the time frame is 2 days. We don't Really see what happens, but we know Anya tells Jimmy without Curly knowing. I genuinely believe he maybe didn't do a Great Job in those two days (the fact he says Anya should've talked to Him before telling Jimmy is uhhh. Mm. 1. Your job to create an environment where she comes to you my man 2. Weird to tell her what she should do with HER OWN PERSONAL INFORMATION) but like.
I get a lot of ppl want immediate consequences but consider that they can't really get rid of Jimmy (co pilot. Which is. Y'know it's Own Problems) but also like. Curly knows Jimmy, and we know that Jimmy tends to lash out. Curly should probably Not Confront Jimmy Unless He Knows Exactly How To Keep Him From Hurting Anya. Like I'm not an expert but this is something genuinely important- when confronting an abuser you NEED to take into account the impact it can have on their victim, and sometimes for the victims safety you need to wait until you have a Solid Plan. It sucks but it's important.
And theres discussion to be had about Curly kinda going along with Jimmy saying "well what if we all died" and like. I do believe he Didn't Realize What Jimmy Said. Like he was just processing/trying to keep the situation under control (and failing because he underestimated how willing Jimmy was to hurt everyone including himself).
Like he's definitely an enabler but I would say his problems are mostly before he understands the gravity of the situation, in that he's friends with Jimmy and assumes the best of a man with abusive tendencies, and fails to create an environment that can keep Anya and the others safe. Like, he definitely doesn't handle in game events perfectly (psych evaluation for one- he does do it instead of Anya which is actually helpful, but he still treats it like. Weirdly.)
Idk I have a lot of thoughts about this game and I don't necessarily want to defend Curly but more like. Anya's situation is very delicate (and light on details) so sometimes the way ppl talk Abt it feels like they aren't actually focused on what she wants and what it means to prioritize her safety y'know?
Edit bc I just now figured out kinda how I want to word it: curly is an enabler and making things worse bc he doesn't put a stop to Jimmy's BS, but in the specific scenario we see in game I think he's trying to use his Skillset of like, people pleasing not for Jimmy's sake but for the crews (like "if I nod my head and say I sympathize he won't lash out and hurt them") which like. There are situations which that is unfortunately the safest option (on an individual level yes, but sometimes it's also necessary to prevent abusers lashing out in response toward ppl who are more vulnerable) but it was the Wrong Choice.
It's like. I think Curly was trying and had good intentions, and understood that he needed to protect the crew, but he didn't have the toolset/experience to realize he can't Just go along with things and that he needs to be able to set hard limits, even for ppl he likes and trusts. Like he failed but the failure was "for want of a nail", where it began way before what we see (for want of an understanding of power dynamics I guess.) Again, don't think this makes curly more forgivable or whatever, I just think he's a good example of trying to make the right choices when you never realized you'd have to make these kinds of decisions and therefore are unprepared and/or unaware
Second edit: personally I don't think you can really incapacitate jimmy without there being serious risk (again he's the copilot) but curly should've given Anya the gun when she told him Abt the pregnancy
#Mouthwashing spoilers#Rape ment#Suicide ment#SA ment#Yeah. Pronouns were kicking m fucking ass in this post. Names also bc I once called curly jimmy#if I write to much my brain stops cooperating with words#Idk. The way she brings up the locks in my mind sounds a little less like#Singular Incident and more. The lack of locks is a Very Important Boundary That's Missing#That feels like it often leads to the erosion of other important boundaries especially when someone abusive#Is specifically pushing those boundaries. Idk again. My take on it#And while Anya says ''i told you'' a part of me thinks she told him like. Y'know vaguely about the situation but probably didn't#Characterize it as assault (bc even if he didn't believe her I don't think he would ask ''who'' if he remembered her telling him#That his friend assaulted her) and was maybe not interpreting it as assault herself bc she was trying to rationalize it#Bc she's in a very isolated situation for over a year in a place where Two Whole Rooms Have Locks.#Realizing she was in the cockpit (has a lock) when Curly is assuming she's suicidal (or at least going to hurt herself)#And then she's in the medbay (has a lock) when she actually. Y'know#Idk I'm fully up to debate this. If someone has good reasoning why curly is actually worse than I think he is I'm all for it#I'm just trying to like. In the context of my beliefs understand the actions he takes and how they fit in within the timeframe#But legit watching a chronological playthrough helps A LOT bc like. Game is super impactful nonlinear#But like. That's not how the characters experienced it and it really fucks with the timeline of events intuitively#Anyway again. If u hate curly that's entirely understandable I just want to try and organize my thoughts while keeping#The timeline and my view of events relatively straight. Feel like there's sometimes a lil too much focus on how the men failed Anya#When we should focus on what Anya's needs and wants are. Which ofc from our POV characters are Hard bc. It's curly and jimmy#But still it's worth trying to understand her better than they do#Game that makes you think so much your brain becomes mouthwash
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would it be fair to say that it feels like ikora keeps getting pushed aside. like that's not to say seeing the pov of other characters isn't important. but like? more than once she's felt like a character that could've been utilized really well, and then just like. wasn't. or was only given the bare minimum amount of attention- primarily with screentime.
#like ig a couple good examples have been haunted and this dlc. she just. was kind of pushed into a lore entry again and not much else#or has just been there as a supportive/encouraging character. i feel like the last time i really saw her kick ass was-#-witch queen or splicer#like. do NOT get me wrong. i love seeing her be empathetic and kind and she doesn't need to be a girlboss.#but like. idk it just feels like she barely gets any sort of action or attention ig???
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I will never not get annoyed over people saying that Brian/Grue joining the Heroes was the obvious and easiest choice out there. Admittedly, the WOGs expand more on it, but even with what we get from Arc 4 when he talks about his trigger event, I can't comprehend how anyone wouldn't see the reasons for him not wanting to join the government sponsored heroes.
Basing this off memory, but to sum it up, Brian goes to him moms house after getting a text from Aisha asking for help. He finds her in some poor condition ( I don't think he goes into detail and it may not matter if he did cause he's not telling the full truth here) and when he tries to take her back to his dad's, their step-dad gets in thew ay and doesn't let them leave. Brian proceeds to beat him up, take his sister back, and gets powers sometime in between.
Then, he, aisha, and their dad go to the police the very next morning. They explain what happened and Brian still describes how he almost got sent to jail. Only aisha backing him up and his step-dad missing an asshole anonymous meeting saved him. And he still got some months of community service. Like, in my opinion he did the right thing every step of the way and still almost got screwed over.
Sometime later, (not immediately cause he's 14 to 15 when he gets powers) he decides to try and take care of aisha by being a villain to get enough money/backing to do it.
That's all described in arc 4. Now we get into the WOGs. Again, basing this off memory, but I can try to find them later.
First, Brian lied about his trigger, a little bit. General event still happened, but when he claimed he didn't know who the man was besides being his mom's new boyfriend, he lied. He knew that man bc it was the same boyfriend who had abused him in the past. And his mom brought him back and let him interact with his sister. Add in his mom's other problems and his dad's ("I wouldn't describe him as abusive") there was a fair bit of emotions Brian was going through that he didn't share. But at the end of the day, every adult in his life failed him and his sister. He wouldn't be willing to extend his trust as easily.
Second, a different WOG described Brian getting into crime in a panic bc aisha had done something afterward that led to her needing to get bailed out of something with money (again, going off memeory) so even if he wanted to join the wards he'd be doing it with a record. Presumably he later decided he might as well go all in on it and get aisha into a safer environment than both his parents. He probably thought it may help with keeping her out of trouble as well if she wasn't around two people who didn't know how to raise kids (not that he did either, but he probably thought he couldn't do worse).
Third, by WOG he did actually consider the wards, but after researching them decided they wouldn't be worth it. Admittedly this was moreso bc of his own hangups with commitment. Bc telling the big organization your power and identity then trying to bail wouldn't really work out, but apparently it was still preferable to a career of crime. It's not like the Protectorate would actually have authority to take a child away from their parents anyway without major proof, especially if that kid isn't a parahuman themself.
Fourth, the undersiders were generally a low risk high reward chance until Taylor joined and brought them her bad luck. They operated for a year and only got into some mild skirmishes with Lung and them being escape artist didn't have an issue with him. Besides that, they made a shot ton of money on top of the 2grand their sponsor gave them.
Fifth, I don't think we ever learned what the time table was for Coil helping out with Brian getting custody, especially given how suspicious Brian was of their mysterious boss and his motives preleviathan. Maybe Coil admitted to knowing Brian's problems and offered a solution at the start. Maybe Brian opened up with it as a condition to him joining. Or maybe after a few months of getting 2grand a relatively easy missions Brian decided to trust the boss who hadn't screwed him and ask for the money to be given to him in a legal paycheck for better chance at custody. I say that last option bc Brian is supposed to be the careful pragmatic one who thinks about his choices and doesn't do the crazy option unless bug girl decides to go full throttle and he begrudgingly goes along. And giving his personal details and a sure fire way of blackmail isn't excalty the pragmatic choice.
Tldr: he has to have some pretty big distrust of authority cause shifty parents and probably shotty police and by WOG became a criminal in a panic before going full in on it. Cause he was, again, like 15 years old.
Now, the argument for him joining the wards is that the Heroes/PRT could have snapped their fingers and given everything Brian would want. And seeing the deal Madcap got I can definitely see the idea behind it, but there are a few problems with that. A) Brian wouldn't know shit about how desperate the Heroes are bc they don't advertise that. B) I'm not sure how much power they would actually have over taking kids away from unhealthy environments cause laws and shit would probably limit that. C) as stated above, he says he almost got jailed for hurting his step-dad so I don't see him liking authority at this stage, no matter how just he was in the eyes of the law for it. D) Brian's own issues and that he's a 15 year old so he won't see the world as a perfectly rational being.
#parahumans#brian laborn#grue#worm#why didnt he get an interlude before his 2nd trigger wildbow#i just hate it when i see stuff like why didnt this emotionally ruined teenager act perfect and logical#i wrote this while needing sleep so sorry for typos#also thats not even getting into the 2 decade long nazi problem in the city he lives in#or how the the protectorate probaly just got their asses kicked by lung cause it would be around this time he made the abb#so the heroes arent looking good is what im saying#long post#meta#i guess? not sure#ill find the wog later im going to bed#maybe clean tbis up into an actual formated post as well
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okay so as a gen 5 stan who does adore the story in bw and bw2, and now that gen 5 has experienced both a vicious hatedom that wouldnt hear a single positive thing about the games, and now a super protective fandom that insists they were perfect and had zero flaws... can we admit now that the bw1 story at least was. a little mid.
#just a little. just a little.#i am saying this as someone who adores it and loves the characters a lot#...... but good god team plasma kinda sucks ass as an evil organization#bw2 is sorta better about them with the split factions but in the first game theyre so obnoxious and come across as strawmen#the game talks about how the world is nuanced and not black and white and its not good to take extreme sides#but then. it sorta does that with the protagonists? by refusing to talk about abused pokemon that werent hurt by team plasma?#obviously they are wrong. the game hammers it in with a mallet. but is it really nuanced if our stance is ''ha ha thats silly''#and yeah groups like plasma exist irl but like. as someone who cares abt animal rights and stuff a lot. i feel like they fumbled it here#the answer shouldnt have been ''well ig some pokemon get hurt. we wont talk about them though. watch the grunt kick a munna''#it shouldve been about animal welfare. like maybe instead of becoming assistant professor; bianca couldve become a nurse joy#or she couldve joined some organization that rescues and rehabilitates pokemon from abusive trainers. maybe the reformed plasma from bw2#and before someone goes ''erm its a kids game they cant do that :/ thats too complicated'' first of all- the anime showed a malnourished te#tepig#kids can handle a bit of text next to a skittish lillipup thats like ''its scared of humans'' or something and its being cared for by someo#someone''#plus the side games were tackling much heavier shit at this point#also again they were apparently fine with a grunt kicking a munna and bragging about how he loves doing that so.#like even as a kid i felt like that scene was really over the top and stupid#team plasma feels less like an attempt to do commentary on harmful animal rights ideas that lead to ecofascism and dont care abt the animal#true needs#and more like gamefreak read a lot of obnoxious critical pokemon posts like ''lmao training is like dogfighting'' and ''this promotes anima#abuse!'' and just made a strawman out of those people. and like i agree thats all stupid but it sorta hurts the message of the game#that the world is very nuanced and taking extremes is bad and reductive.#and this isnt getting into poor story and gameplay integration and other stuff like underutilized characters (you know exactly who i mean)#idk. again i still adore the story and have a huge soft spot for it. but i think the only reason people say its perfect is out of defensive#defensiveness and not having engaged with a ton of video game stories. and pokemon stories not being fantastic in general#like i think pla is better put together story wise than this game and its got less going on than this#echoed voice
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toy doctor redux
plushy based on this guy
#pokemon#swsh#champion leon#ask to tag#a wizard leon!! I think this is still the only one that's not directly called a wizard#gods. I put so much into this one. and for what#yeah design wise this is mostly tightening up the palette compared to the prev version and dividing the theming more evenly#between the toy half and the doctor half#this kicked my ass so hard lmao. and Im not even super happy with it as it is#I feel like I couldve organized the 'pushing daisy' idea more elegantly. following the og design's cue on this mightve been a mistake#but well. the lance has been thrown it lands how it lands#having a wizard leon design that's specifically restorative so to say is really nice... the ability to fix....#okay. holy shit I need to lay down#just figured out the coffee candy Ive been snackin on may contain caffeine#so uh. I need to let off That pedal. mm#in time. I will find another candy. so long my love...#have a good night lad! sew a little heart inside it and send it on its way now
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hii! honeslty just curious, I read/watched kuroshitsuji AGES ago and I don't think I've finished the manga anyway, does grell go by she/her?? I vageuly remember ppl headcanonning them as enby though iirc in canon he's a guy?
Your tags peaked my curiosity, I haven't seen any Kuro content in a hot minute, but I remember it being the absolute must watch in my peak anime watching years lol And I absolutely loved the manga's artstyle
in canon grell is a trans woman, yana toboso has said something like "grell is a man with a woman's heart" ages ago and sometimes around 2014/16 had tweeted something about wanting to be more careful with her representation of people like grell in the future, don't quote me on that thought because i only read that tweet once and only remember reading a shitty screenshot of a translation of that interview where she allegedly said that.
i can however show you this:
it's from a bonus chapter (after chapter 108) about the popularity polls (it's a very convoluted non canon chapter) but it's one of the most blatant example of her being trans.
there's also the way she constantly refers to herself as a "young maiden" ect. idk how it goes exactly in the og but in french they translated it so grell always refers to herself with feminine terms while everyone else misgender her including the narrator. she very consistently reaffirm herself as a woman through every single ones of her appearances, like it's a thing she very much does, every single time she's on screen.
i haven't watched the anime in forever (cause it's kind of a disgrace and insult to the manga lol) but if i remember properly (which i mostly likely don't) they did omit/lowkey censor some of grell explicitly going "i wish i had been born a woman/could have been able to carry children" when she first properly introduce herself as a shinigami & the other half of jack the killer. (the anime also really did lean a lot more into the pervert queer caricature whereas in the manga she's given a bit more dignity, especially the further the story goes. though that might be my own impression and maybe it didn't change that much i just love her a whole lot).
also because i have to, please forget the anime (the first two seasons that is) and read the manga first and foremost because oh boy, what a disaster the anime is (nostlagia and atmosphere wise it's entertaining, i really love the op & ed, but it just, i just cant man it doesn't even compare to the manga at all). only watch book of circus -> book of murder -> campania movie -> the new private school arc that's coming soon (idk what they called it) after reading the manga.
#undescribed#she's my problematic girlie and i love her so much. there's subtext too for her transness but that goes in spoilers territory. otherwise sh#'s been VERY blatantly trans since her introduction it baffles me ppl refuse to accept it (not noticing it is fine cause when i was a kid i#didnt really get it because i didnt know trans ppl where a thing but one day it all clicked into place yknow)#unrelated but it kills me that sebastian is only a transphobe because it's 'historically accurate/what a good butler of his position#should be' he only says that because 1 he's a bitch 2 he doesn't like grell 3 he gets a kick out of playing the good butler role#i hate/love his stupid fucking ass i need to punch him so bad. he's so annoyingly funny i can't stand him. he's just awful and having a#grand time what an ass. back to queer ppl there are other in the story like nina hopkins being a lesbian (HEAVELY implied) and doll's whole#thing. it's one of my favorite manga ppl should give it a try just dont look at the anime pretend it's not there pls
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Magenta 😥
#imposter syndrome is bad today#anyone have tips or words of encouragement?#i got triggered by the scores on the platform#im at a 96 which isn't bad that's actually pretty fucking good#i need to stay above 85% to keep my contract#but i checked to see what areas that dipped and one of them I'm kinda going wtf?#about maintaining boundaries#im really huge on that shit and always let people know if they get uncomfortable with a topic subject or need to change the convo#we absolutely can always do that#so im kinda sitting here going “Okay where can i improve? where is this coming from? were they having a bad day? did i say something off?”#i know too you can't appease everyone and there are some clients that just won't like you for whatever reason and will answer the surveys to#dip your scores cause of resentment#logically i know these are things#im struggling with not having closure cause if i am doing anything wrong i want to correct that and i want to be told what it is#cause i can't change unless im given some direction#my mentor encouraged me to be myself show up authentic and I've been doing that#seeing the dip is making me second guess everything#and i know i shouldn't be upset cause again im at a 96 fucking percent!#but man I'm just kicking my own ass#magenta#magenta is my vent word
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When you're running healer, get one of the more chaotic Endwalker trials on roulette, and half the party is in a cutscene
#just ffxiv things#I haven't started DT yet - I'm being good until after the move#the tanks and I basically carried that one#I need to make a fun macro for my healer LB3#either something like 'wakey wakey eggs n bakey' or 'yes I know we're all very tired but there's asses to kick'
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