#i just feel like i usually think my stress is very visible and i guess it isnt? apparently? according to karen it isnt lol

[clownboy-yeehonk]

.

[pandapetals]

Sexting

Logan's been gone on a mission for days now. You miss him terribly and one little text spirals into sexting.

logan howlett x fem!reader - inspired by a tiktok i saw, teasing banter, sexting, flirting, established relationship, smut, phone sex, masturbation, orgasms, dirty talk, cocky logan, dominant/possessive logan, pet names used, good girl praising

a/n: horny era entered.

divider credit: @enchanthings

The day had dragged on, each hour stretching longer than the last. Between the endless grind at work, the knot of stress coiling tighter in your chest, and nearly everyone testing the limits of your patience, you felt utterly wrung out. By the time the sun sank below the horizon, all you wanted was to melt into Logan’s arms—strong, steady, and always warm, like they were built to shield you from the rest of the world.

But Logan wasn’t here. He’d been sent off on a mission three days ago with no clear answer to the question that gnawed at you the most: When would he come home? Three days felt like three weeks, and the ache of missing him was a dull, constant hum beneath your skin.

You had done everything you could to fill the space he left behind. His pillow now wore one of his shirts, the fabric soft and faintly infused with his scent. You’d sprayed it with his cologne—too much, honestly, but the sharp, musky notes helped. At night, you’d curl around it, imagining his arms around you instead, but it was never the same. You missed the rough timbre of his voice, the way he’d smirk and toss out some gruff remark that made you laugh. You even missed how his scruff would scrape against your cheek when he kissed you.

Now, you were sprawled across the bed, Logan’s stand-in pillow hugged close as your thumb aimlessly scrolled through your phone. A familiar pang of longing twisted your stomach as you stumbled across a photo of a couple kissing under twinkling lights. You sighed and were about to toss your phone aside when it buzzed in your hand, a new message lighting up the screen.

Logan: I miss you so much, gorgeous.

Your heart clenched, a smile tugging at your lips before you could help it. You quickly typed back:

You: Miss you too, handsome.

Your fingers hovered over the keyboard, the ache of missing him pressing harder than ever. A mischievous thought sparked in your mind, and before you could second-guess yourself, you typed it out.

You: You should send me a photo of your bicep for being gone so long.

The typing bubble appeared almost instantly, and you could practically hear Logan’s low chuckle in your head.

Logan: That so?

Before you could reply, your phone buzzed, and a new image loaded on the screen. The photo made your breath hitch. Logan was sprawled out on what looked like a worn motel bed, his shirt pushed up to his chest, exposing the hard ridges of his abs. But the star of the show was his arm, flexed in a way that showed off every curve of his bicep. The dim lighting cast shadows that deepened the definition of his muscles, and the veins stood out just enough to make your mouth dry.

You swallowed, your face heating as you bit your lip. His usual teasing smirk wasn’t visible in the photo, but you could feel it like it was carved into the very pixels of the screen.

Another message buzzed in.

Logan: Feel better, honey?

You groaned, the grin tugging at your lips both frustrated and helplessly smitten.

You: No. Now I just really want to bite your bicep.

His reply came faster than you expected.

Logan: You’ll have to be patient, sweetheart. But don’t worry, I’ll let you.

Your stomach flipped, heat pooling low in your belly as you stared at his words. God, you could hear his voice so clearly, that deep, teasing rasp that always made your pulse skip.

You: You’re cruel, you know that?

Logan: Cruel would be reminding you how good my hands feel on you. But I won’t do that. Not while I’m stuck in this dump, thinking about what I’d do if I were there instead.

Your breath caught, and your thumb hovered uncertainly over the screen. You could feel the shift in his tone, that familiar heat creeping into his words even through text.

You: What would you do, Logan?

The typing bubble appeared, then disappeared, like he was taking his time to think—or maybe to make you squirm. When his reply finally came, it hit you like a jolt of lightning.

Logan: First, I’d pin you to the bed. Then I’d take my time—slow, deliberate—just to hear you beg. You’d look so good under me, darlin’. I can practically see it.

Your thighs pressed together instinctively, heat rolling through you in waves.

You: You’re not playing fair.

Logan: I never do. 

You couldn’t argue with that. Every word, every teasing reply, every memory of his hands on you was like a match to dry kindling, leaving you aching for him in almost unbearable ways. You leaned back against the pillows, closing your eyes as your fingers hovered over your phone, your imagination already running wild.

Before you could think of a reply, your phone buzzed again.

Logan: I miss your body, but you know what I miss more? The way you look at me after. That soft, sleepy, satisfied look, like I’m the only man in the world who can make you feel that way.

Your heart clenched, warmth blooming in your chest and mingling with the heat already simmering there. God, you wanted him so badly it was a physical ache.

You: You’re going to kill me, Logan.

Logan: Nah, honey. Just keeping you hungry for me. Trust me, I’m starving over here too.

His words wrapped around you like a warm, possessive embrace, filling the void he’d left behind. Though hundreds of miles separated you, for a moment, it almost felt like he was there—his rough hands sliding over your skin, his lips grazing that sensitive spot just beneath your jaw, the weight of his body. The ache of missing him was unbearable, pressing hard and heavy in your chest. You buried your face in his pillow, inhaling the faint remnants of his scent, but it only made the longing sharper.

Your thumb hovered over the screen as you finally typed back, giving in to your own need to feel closer to him:

You: I’ve been sleeping with your pillow... making it wear your shirt.

The reply came almost immediately, his words brimming with that familiar mix of teasing and heat that sent a thrill rushing through you.

Logan: Bet you’ve been doing naughty things to it too.

Your breath caught, your face flushing as you stared at the screen. Damn him. How did he always know? He had an almost supernatural ability to read you, even from miles away. You bit your lip, the memory of those late, lonely nights flashing vividly in your mind—the way you’d pressed his pillow between your thighs, imagining it was him, imagining his weight, his heat, his voice in your ear telling you to let go. You knew when he got home, he’d take one deep inhale and know exactly what you’d done.

Your fingers trembled as you typed back, heart pounding.

You: Maybe I have. What are you gonna do about it?

The three little dots of his reply appeared, then disappeared, then reappeared, drawing out the tension until you wanted to scream. When the message finally popped up, it was pure Logan.

Logan: Oh, sweetheart, you know what I’ll do. First, I’ll ask you to tell me exactly what you did. Then I’d make you show me. And I wouldn’t let you stop until you were begging.

Heat shot through your body, pooling low in your belly as you shifted restlessly on the bed. Your lips parted, a soft breath escaping as your imagination ran wild, conjuring the image of him above you, his rough hands and deep voice taking you apart piece by piece.

You glanced at your phone’s camera, a bold idea sparking in your mind. If Logan wanted to play, you’d show him you could hold your own. Slowly, you sat up, slipping the strap of your tank top down one shoulder. The fabric slid lower, exposing more of your skin, and your pulse raced as you positioned the camera just right. The click of the shutter sounded louder than it should have, your heart hammering as you looked at the result—a sultry shot of your bare shoulder, collarbone, and the faintest hint of cleavage.

You attached the photo to the message and typed, fingers trembling slightly:

You: Think you can handle this when you get home?

The response came almost instantly, and it was clear you’d hit your mark.

Logan: Jesus Christ, darlin’!

A second message followed:

Logan: You trying to kill me?

You smirked, a wave of confidence washing over you as you typed back.

You: Just keeping you on your toes. You’re the one who said you’d pin me down, remember?

His reply was a voice note this time, and when you pressed play, the low, gravelly sound of his voice sent a shiver straight through you.

Logan (voice note): Oh, I remember. And trust me when I get back, you won’t be walking straight for days. You keep teasing me like this, and I’m gonna make sure you pay for every second of it.

Your thighs clenched as you listened to the raw hunger in his tone, heat blooming across your skin. But you weren’t done teasing him yet.

You adjusted your tank top a little lower, this time snapping a photo that showed more—the curve of your chest, the line of your neck, the look in your eyes that you knew would drive him wild. You sent it without a caption, letting the image speak for itself.

The reply came in seconds.

Logan: You better not be touching yourself right now. That’s mine.

A thrill ran through you at the possessiveness in his words.

You: What if I am?

Another voice note came through, this one darker. His voice dropped an octave, sending goosebumps racing down your arms.

Logan (voice note): Don’t you dare finish without me, sweetheart. When I get home, you’re going to come on my fingers, my tongue, and then my—

You couldn’t stop the whimper that slipped out as you hit pause, your whole body burning with need.

You: Logan...

Logan: You started this, gorgeous. Don’t get shy on me now.

You sighed, biting your lip as your fingers tightened around your phone. Heat simmered low in your belly, and your heart raced as you debated your next move. Logan was right—you had started this, and now there was no turning back. Your thumb hovered over the screen for a moment, your nerves threatening to get the better of you, but the longing for him—his touch, his voice, the way he looked at you—overpowered everything else.

With a deep breath, you hit the video call button. The screen flickered for a moment, your reflection briefly staring back at you before the call connected. And then there he was.

Logan appeared on your screen, lying back against the headboard of some cheap motel bed. The light in the room was dim, but it did nothing to dull the sharp angles of his jaw or the piercing heat in his eyes. He had one arm tucked lazily behind his head, the other holding the phone, but there was nothing casual about how he looked at you—like he could devour you through the screen.

A slow, almost predatory smirk curved his lips. “There’s my pretty girl. For a second, I thought you’d chickened out.”

You swallowed hard, the sound of his voice making your pulse race. “You’ve got me all flustered,” you admitted, your voice softer than you intended.

Logan’s chuckle was low and rough like gravel sliding over honey. “Sweetheart, you’re the one teasing me,” he said, his gaze raking over you through the screen. “All I did was tell you what I wanted to do when I get home. But if I’m being honest…” His smirk widened, his tongue sliding briefly over his bottom lip. “I don’t think either one of us can wait that long.”

A shiver ran down your spine at his words. He shifted slightly, and the movement made his shirt pull tight across his chest and shoulders, the fabric doing little to hide the hard lines of muscle underneath. You let out a breath.

“Logan…” you whispered, but it came out more like a plea than you intended.

His voice softened, the teasing giving way to something more intimate. “Yeah, darlin’?”

Your fingers gripped the phone tighter as you adjusted the angle, letting the camera catch the way your tank top clung to your body, how the strap had slipped off one shoulder. His eyes darkened instantly, the air between you thickening even through the distance.

“Show me,” he murmured, his tone low and commanding. “You’ve been driving me crazy all night. Now I want to see you, pretty girl. Let me see what’s mine.”

Your breath hitched, heat flooding your cheeks, but how he was looking at you made it impossible to resist. Slowly, your free hand trailed down your neck and over your collarbone, lingering at the edge of your top. His gaze tracked every movement, his jaw clenching as he exhaled heavily.

“Good girl,” he rasped, his voice like a caress. “Keep going.”

You couldn’t help the small, breathy sound that escaped your lips as you let the fabric slide lower, revealing just enough to leave him wanting more. His hand moved slightly on his end of the screen, and you had a pretty good idea of what he was doing.

“Logan,” you breathed, your voice trembling with nervousness and excitement.

“Don’t stop,” he urged, his tone rougher now, filled with a hunger that sent a rush of heat straight through you. “You’re so fucking beautiful. God, I can’t wait to get my hands on you again.”

Your fingers trembled as you slid your tank top down, the cool air brushing over your bare skin, making your breath hitch. Logan’s eyes burned into you through the screen, the teasing smirk on his lips softening into something darker, more primal. His gaze wasn’t just hungry—it was devouring like he wanted to memorize every inch of you even from miles away.

“Goddamn,” he muttered, his voice a low growl that sent shivers racing down your spine. “You’re perfect. Absolutely perfect.”

Your cheeks flushed, heat blooming under his praise, but it only fueled the fire building inside you. Biting your lip, you whispered, “Show me what you’re doing.”

The words came out so soft you weren’t sure he’d heard you, but then his lips curved into a wicked grin that made your stomach flip. “You sure about that, sweetheart?” he asked, his tone rough and teasing.

You nodded, unable to find your voice, your pulse thundering in your ears.

Logan shifted slightly, the phone shaking just enough to make your anticipation climb. He adjusted the angle, tilting the camera lower until the frame revealed the sharp lines of his abs disappearing beneath the waistband of his sweatpants. Your breath caught as he pulled the fabric down just enough to show you the outline of his arousal, his hand wrapped around himself, moving slowly, deliberately.

“See what you do to me?” he muttered, his voice thick with desire. His hand stroked lazily, his movements unhurried, like he wanted you to feel every second of it. “Every damn time, darlin’. I can’t even think straight when it comes to you.”

Your heart stuttered, your thighs pressing together instinctively as heat pooled low in your belly. The sight of him, the way his body tensed with every stroke, the way his breath hitched as he watched you—it was almost too much.

“Logan…” you breathed, your voice trembling with need.

“Keep going,” he rasped, his eyes flickering back up to meet yours. They were dark and intense, filled with raw hunger. “I want to see all of you, gorgeous. Don’t hold back on me now.” 

Your free hand drifted down your body with deliberate slowness, tracing the curves of your waist and the soft plane of your stomach, until your fingertips brushed the waistband of your underwear. The fabric felt impossibly delicate under your touch, and your breath hitched as you let your fingers linger there, teasing both yourself and him.

Logan’s eyes burned through the screen, dark and hungry, following every movement of your hand. His jaw tightened, and you saw the flex of his arm as his strokes grew just a bit faster, his breath hitching in rhythm. The tension between you was unbearable, a crackling heat that made the distance between you feel almost cruel.

“Don’t stop,” Logan rasped, his voice rough and uneven. “I need to see you. All of you.”

The raw need in his voice sent a shiver racing through you, your pulse pounding as you slowly tilted the phone. The angle shifted, and the screen filled with the sight of your bare skin, the way your hand dipped beneath the fabric of your underwear, teasing at the heat there. A soft, breathless sound slipped from your lips as your fingers began to move, exploring yourself with slow, deliberate strokes.

Logan groaned a low, guttural sound that sent a wave of heat washing over you. “Fuck, darlin’,” he muttered, his voice thick with need. His phone shifted slightly, and your eyes flicked to the screen to see his hand moving more urgently now, his chest rising and falling in uneven breaths. “You’re so goddamn beautiful. Look at you… so wet for me.”

The heat of his words made your thighs tremble as your body arched instinctively, your hand moving in sync with the rising tension in his voice. The soft, wet sounds of your fingers moving against your slick heat filled the air between you, and you bit your lip, trying—and failing—to muffle the needy whimper that escaped.

“That’s it, good girl,” Logan growled, his tone both commanding and reverent. “Don’t hold back. I want to hear you. I want to see what I do to you.”

Your phone slipped slightly in your trembling hand, but you steadied it, angling it just enough to give him the view he craved. His reaction was instant—a sharp intake of breath, followed by a string of curses muttered under his breath.

“You’re gonna kill me,” he groaned, his hand faltering for a moment as he dragged his free hand through his hair, his head falling back against the headboard. “I can’t fucking wait to get my hands on you.

Your breath hitched, and you couldn’t stop the soft whimper that escaped your lips. “What would you do, Logan?” you asked in a shaky whisper.

His eyes darkened further, his expression turning almost feral. “I’d start by kissing you everywhere,” he growled. “Slow, soft, until you’re trembling for me. Then I’d pin your wrists above your head, hold you still so you’d have to feel every second of it while screaming my name.”

Your head fell back against the pillows as his words washed over you, the heat in his voice lighting up every nerve in your body.

“Keep touching yourself, sweetheart,” he urged, his tone both commanding and coaxing. “Such a good girl for me.”

His words pushed you closer to the edge, the ache in your body growing unbearable as your fingers moved faster, your breaths coming in soft, uneven gasps. “Logan,” you whimpered, his name a broken plea on your lips.

“Come for me,” he demanded, his voice low and rough like he could feel your tension through the screen. “I want to see it. I want to watch you fall apart for me.”

“You’re killing me,” you managed to whisper, your voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart.

His lips curved into a crooked, breathless smile. “You started it, gorgeous,” he said, his voice rough and uneven now. “And when I get home, I’m gonna finish it. Properly.”

The promise in his tone sent a fresh wave of heat through you, your body aching for him in ways that words couldn’t begin to describe. But for now, this was all you had—his voice, his eyes on you, the sound of his breath growing heavier as the two of you shared this moment across the distance.

“Logan…” you whimpered again, your body arching as you felt yourself reaching the edge.

“Let go for me. Good girl,” he murmured, his voice softening but losing none of its intensity. “Show me how good I make you feel.”

The heat in his tone, the intensity of his gaze, the way his hand was moving on himself—it all pushed you over the edge. Your body tensed, a sharp gasp slipping from your lips as the wave of release crashed over you, your hand faltering as you rode it out. Logan groaned deeply, his own release following seconds after, his head falling back as his chest heaved.

For a few moments, the two of you were silent, your breaths filling the space between you. Logan was the first to speak, his voice softer now, tinged with satisfaction and lingering desire. “Goddammit,” he muttered, his voice husky and low. “You’re gonna be the death of me, darlin’.”

You laughed breathlessly, your body still buzzing, your heart full. “I could say the same about you, handsome,” you teased, though your voice was still shaky.

He shook his head, his eyes softening as they locked onto yours through the screen. “You better be ready,” he said, his tone playful but underlined with a seriousness that made your stomach flip. “Because when I get back, I’m not letting you out of my sight—or my bed—for a very, very long time.”

“Promise?” you asked, your lips curving into a lazy, satisfied smile.

Logan’s grin turned wicked, his eyes gleaming. “Oh, it’s not a promise. It’s a guarantee.”

[donutz]

Yandere Dogday x shy female reader

A/N|| Yandere Dogday isn't really a yandere that acts out, he just watches, as I prefer sticking characters to their personalities, and the fact Dogday wouldn't hurt a fly, literally. Also this is quite shorter than my usual uploads, sorry(x_x)

Request from Wattpad—! Here you go Justlila79 ☆

—☆You are a human in this

I mean, Playtime co wouldn’t be a bad place to work at right?

It’s just dealing with a bunch of toys! And kids..

There’ll be times where you freak out a bit on how human they were.

Toys with a digestive system? You weren’t sure about that one…

But what harm could go along with that? After one month you’re already warming up to this place!

Though you sometimes feel uneasy.

Like when you’re by yourself. You can barely even get sleep! Well at your workplace… I guess that motivates you not to sleep on the job.

And because of that certain someone stalking you, you can kind of.. Zone out. Of course, somebody had to notice. Dogday. He’s asked why you’re so tense, but when you explain it he gets nervous.

… Thinking about it, it is kinda strange. You’ll look into the shadows and at times you’ll see a resemblance of a sun.

The same sun that laid as a necklace around Dogday’s neck. There’s no way the cheerful and loving dog would be stalking you right? Yea probably, he’s been giving you hints without trying.

Maybe you’re just thinking too much! Yeah that’s all. You do tend to do that with every situation.

You’d go off and adventure into those particular shadows but that’s how you get killed in a horror movie. But if that stalker was Dogday I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t do anything but walk away, or try to make a noise to distract you.

.

.

.

Maybe you should just stop thinking about it.

“Co-worker! Are you alright?” Dogday’s bright voice snapped you out of your very deep thoughts.

“Uh, yeah. Maybe.”

“... Is it because of that person who ‘stalks’ you..?”

You wouldn’t want a cheerful dog to know that you’re stressed. I mean it’s Dogday so it’s okay… Maybe.

“... Yeah. I don’t feel too uneasy about it but— I think I know who.”

You could visibly see Dogday’s eyes growing more worried.

“Oh! Really…”

You gently hold his sun necklace as you make eye contact with him,(something that you can barely do)“Are you the one who’s been watching me Dogday…?”

“...”

“Could you just answer me please..”

After a good 5 minutes of silence, you had to do something to convince him to talk.

“I won’t be mad—”

“Yes. I am.”

You let out a big sigh, “That’s what it took to convince you? Makes sense. But why?”

“Uhm… Because I like you.”

“In which way…”

“Not like a crush but… Like I wanna hang out with you and be with you.. All the time…”

“You should’ve just told me Dogday… You can hang out with me more often if you’d like, just ask.”

“I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay.”

After that talk, you went to your work area and had Dogday with you because the kids haven’t woken up yet so it was fine for him to be here.

He was sitting on your lap with his tail wagging, mainly because he can finally get that ton of weight that was on your back, and be with you at the same time.

To the average adult your work would be boring, but to Dogday it was like a whole new world. You looked down and saw how happy Dogday was just to be alone with you.

You found it adorable.

He really is just a puppy.

[starjxsung]

okayyy i guess i will make the first request !!! :3 what do you think jealous sex with skz would be like ? the type of sex where they're so jealous and frustrated by something (or someone), they need to fuck their frustration into you

giggles and runs away

-🦢

Chan: quiet at first about why he’s frustrated or jealous tbh. sorta just makes it obvious that he’s horny (I lowk feel like he would get horny as a result of being frustrated or mad??), fucks his anger out on you and it’s v sloppy, not rushed per se but closer to a quickie even though he can still go a few rounds. Lots of heavy grunting and he’s not trying to be quiet at all. And only after he’s finished and you’re in bed beside him catching your breath, he’ll indulge you in the details of what’s got him so bothered. Become the sort of thing where you’re horny if he comes home in a visibly frustrated mood because you know what it implies ! Very talkative during aftercare though. Like your own personal little Channie gossip sesh

Minho: will rant to you between kisses while he’s ripping your clothes off. Hes definitely indulging you in all the details the second he’s alone with you- you’re the type to be on the same page about everything together, and naturally, you hate the people he hates and vice versa. So when he’s frustrated, he goes to you first about it. Sometimes it can be a very emotional sort of thing, could mean he’s shedding a few tears out of frustration and you’re there to console him about it. But when it’s just straight anger or annoyance, he’s going to rant to you until he physically cannot talk in between kisses anymore. He’ll probably even just start to fuck you while he’s still ranting until his frustration turns into the type of pleasure that replaces his words with nothing but heavy breathing and moaning. Not even sure what he was so annoyed about by the time he’s done w you !

Changbin: doesn’t want to make a big deal about it ! You have to sorta coax it out of him. And honestly, he’s simultaneously best coaxed and relaxed after a good fuck. He’s not one to be too rough or anything just because he’s upset, but he’s just grateful you’re the best stress reliever. Lots of kissing, desperate grabbing at each other and sometimes the sex can even feel lighthearted when he’s aware that you’re doing your best to comfort him. Sort of the realization that no source of frustration or jealousy is worth letting it come between the two of you. So he’ll just give himself to focusing on your pleasure and then talk it out after. He might even deny it after and joke around that he was never frustrated or jealous to begin with, but he’s still thanking you for it and eventually you’ll be on the same page about what’s bothering him.

Hyunjin: sweaty. When he gets consumed by frustration or especially jealousy, he’s particularly sloppy with his thrusts, very sweaty, probably sucks a few hickies wherever he can reach and doesn’t care to make them discreet. He’s all heavy breathing, loud groaning, just kinda wants to fill you up with his load as a stress reliever tbh. Feel like he wouldn’t say anything about it but you’d know he was jealous in the way he fucks. Also evident in the way he speaks very little- of course he’ll pay careful attention to cues to make sure he’s not hurting you or anything, but the talking will be very minimal. He just relies on his body language to indicate what he wants. If he is jealous about something, my guess is you won’t know until he’s had a few days to wait on it before saying anything.

Jisung: needier than usual ! Feel like especially if he got jealous over something, he’d be itching to get you home and fuck you like he never has before, just to prove a point. Maybe uses it as an opportunity to try something you’ve both been wanting to try. The guy at the bar was staring at you a little too long? He’s going to drag you to the car and fuck you right there, knowing you’ve been vocalizing your desire to try it, but he sees it as an opportunity to get your head spinning before you can get him even more frustrated. You can bet he’s going to walk back into the bar with his shirt half-on and a cocky fucking smirk. Has you wrapped around his finger tbh, so jealousy isn’t a huge deal ! Frustration is just opportunism for him.

Felix: particularly keen on pleasuring you. He’s vulnerable with his emotions at first, so you’ll know that he’s got something on his mind, but then he just wants to make you feel good in turn. Has you on the edge of his bed very fast, all desperate to eat you out and channel all his frustration into his tongue and his fingers. Your mood is often aligned with his- which means if he’s stressed, you’re stressed, and vice versa. Solution is to make you cum as many times as you can- and then pretty soon your satisfaction is his, too. Definitely won’t lose an opportunity to fuck you too, probably transitions to fucking you when you’re just nearly tired enough so he can make sure you’re both exhausted and satisfied by the end of it. Just treats you good all around !

Seungmin: actually doesn’t get frustrated or jealous very often. And when he does, he’s largely nonchalant about it. Will offhandedly mention something that pissed him off, and you know it’s a little more than mild annoyance when he gets quiet. It’s you who wants to pleasure him as a result, and it quickly becomes some unspoken thing between you both to just fuck out the frustration. He probably doesn’t even realize how annoyed he is until he’s thrusting into you and his emotions are elevated tenfold. He’s still gentle with you, and very set on making you feel good. But you both have the same idea to pleasure each other as much as possible, so it quickly gets rougher and sloppier. The aftercare is A1 though and you probably take like a 10 hour nap after it tbh

Jeongin: a little embarrassed that he’s even frustrated or jealous in the first place! Feels like he’s not supposed to be for some reason. He has this opinion that as a boyfriend, he shouldn’t drag his emotions into your relationship and potentially let it get between you two. But also king of healthy communication, so he’ll reluctantly bring it up to you and then apologize and swear he’s not frustrated or jealous anymore (even if he is…) and the sex that follows is sweet, but desperate. He’s just desperate to be a little closer to you, like a physical reminder that you’re his and you’re not going anywhere regardless of his moods or whatever made him jealous. He loves taking control and being able to look at you, kiss you, touch you wherever he can and just have a tangible reminder that you’re satisfied with him.

[crepes-suzette-373]

Ichiji can "fear" (or panic)?

A while back I said that something feels funny that Ichiji was visibly sweating when Sanji freed the Vinsmokes from the candy.

Another thing that caught my attention is that Ichiji's face was heavily shaded in that scene, and it's a scene didn't seem to warrant heavy shading for lighting effect.

So, I checked through the artwork for comparison. Here's my artwork related hyperthink.

I'm noticing that when characters are in panic/in distress/experiencing turbulent emotions, sensei draws them with cross hatching on their face. Sure, sometimes the hatching is just "lighting effect", but when there's no intense lighting that warranted that kind of shadow hatching, the hatching means strong emotional reaction.

There's also dark shading for intimidation/horror effect, but based on context that's not what this is either.

Usually the "distress shading" is on the eyes, but sometimes there's more shading on the other parts of the face too. Below are examples of that on characters when in distress, panicking, nervous, or tense:

Well, Ichiji's eyes can't be seen, so my guess here is that sensei chose to cross hatch a large portion of his face (maybe to make sure you can see it?). In these instances, he's the only one whose face has that kind of intense shading when nobody else does, so it's not because of "lighting".

Also, I want to point out again, in the left picture, it wasn't just one or two drops. It was drawn in a way that implies he was sweating very profusely (the drops were dripping off his face). That seems rather intense, if it's not meant to be anything.

Example of comparison:

The only other ones with "stressed out faces" in that scene are Sanji, Bege, and Judge, so Ichiji's oddly shaded face is not lighting. Those three people I specified are feeling emotional pressure/tension in that scene.

(Also, might there be a significance in choosing to also screentone-shade Yonji there? We know that Yonji is rather openly emotional, so this might be something to scrutinise as well)

And if you apply that reading to other scenes it feels appropriate. For example, this part here:

The distress lines being drawn there probably meant that he was also concerned, but he's gritting himself to not linger and stay on track.

He may say "leave her for being weak", but I think that's not what he meant. He's prioritising "the mission" (covering for Caesar and Bege, so the Straw Hat crew especially Sanji can escape) over their individual safety.

Even if it had been himself who was knocked down, I can bet that he'd say the same thing. Stop getting distracted, get going with the mission.

Once Caesar made it out safely with Bege, you can see him also having sweat droplets and sighing in relief.

In the scene when he commands the ship to go, my read of it is that he's feeling the tension of knowing they're going to fight a tough enemy:

He's probably not sure they'll come out of it unscathed, and he's concerned for their safety, but still determined to step in to help. Just like how he's making that same face when saying to leave Reiju and keep going.

The "proof" is that Niji and Yonji don't really do this. Yonji sort of made that face after he did Winch Danton, and he and Niji somewhat do it too when Big Mum screams. Both are contexts of "physical strain" stress, from pain and exerting energy.

Otherwise, they don't have that distressed shaded face even when clearly showing concern:

In that third picture, you can even see that Reiju has the "distressed hatching" on her forehead, in comparison to Niji and Yonji who both don't at all (in the second picture).

Ichiji was making those faces when not under any physical strain, and was actually not making that stress face when Big Mum screams (even though Reiju has that same distress hatching on her forehead then).

My tentative guess is that, while Ichiji might not have empathy/sympathy like Reiju or Sanji do, what he might have is the ability to feel "fear". Maybe adjacent feelings too, like panic or very intense worry that's beyond just concern (Niji and Yonji can still be "concerned" too, as shown above), as well as "relief" in response when the fear is alleviated.

It somewhat fits with what I had dissected in the "thug Ichiji" analysis. He seems angry despite what looks like a smile on his face (I argue it's a sneer, and not a smile like Niji and Yonji were doing). Sometimes, people lash out in anger when they are scared.

Edit: Just wanted to add, to be clear. Yonji has been given the "shaded face", but I meant that it's rather clearly the intimidation one, when he was telling the Straw Hat crew he doesn't want to help Luffy. And I said in the context, Ichiji's shaded face don't seem to suggest intimidation.

The only possible counter I could think of for Ichiji is that "Oh, it's not fear/other emotions, he's just really angry the whole time".

[sethisgay]

Can you do one with Eminem where you guys meet at a party and they end up kissing also can it take place in the 90s?

Eminem x male reader

Smut!!

A/n: wrote this when i was drunk, this is a mess sorry!

Note: now two things! One English is not my first language, so keep that in mind!! Two I know I will guarantee get hate for this, if you are triggered by mlm please leave so I don’t need to deal with the mental stress I’ll get from it!!! I know his name is Marshall but I’m to lazy so he’ll be referred to as em. They’re 21! I know this doesn’t make chronic sense but idc.

For: anon and @starzox

Warnings: Eminem’s first gay kiss. Takes place in the 90’s. Mentions of homophobia. Smut. Oral (r!receiving) No kinks.

Summary: in request ~

Requestlist - Masterlist

Read at own risk - I can’t cut lol

————

A new feeling

Eminem’s pov:

I had know for a while that I that i had accepted that i was gay, it really had taken a toll on my life. My sexuality was something I’ve always struggled with, but I guess my mom always had known and always told me to never confess my love unless I asked for permission. Back then that felt normal, but now I think back at that time and laugh at my self for thinking it was normal.

My best friend and crush had invited me to his birthday party, per usual. He came out to me when we were 15, back then most ‘friends’ of his bullied him for it. Not me though. Friends stay loyal to each other, can trust each other. They don’t go behind their back’s, gossip about each other.

The party was on a Friday. When I got the invite I hadn’t had Thursday I had, everything that could go wrong went wrong. I slept through my alarm clock, so I woke up at 2 P/m. I missed the bus two times. And I stepped in dog shit

Y/n pov:

The first person to arrive at my party was Em, my best friend and biggest crush. After awhile the party started. Everyone was having fun, Em seemed to be having fun and I was having fun.

At one moment i felt that i had a boner, it wasn’t caused by anything. It was that type of boner. I looked around and saw Em look down at then away with mouth open. It was a non-noticeable-very-noticeable boner. Also i had a 11 inch cock.

I obviously was confused but also excited, so I signed at him to follow me, it was really busy so nobody noticed anyway. Before the party I had told everyone to stay down stairs, luckily everyone listened because when we reached upstairs it was empty.

“So, I saw you checking me out.” I said with a surprise tone to Em.

“I know and I’m sorry I should’ve told you, but I’ve had this crush on you.” He frantically said trying not to panic.

“Hey, chill. The feeling is mutual, we could take this to my room i you get what i mean.” I open the door and we walked in. I locked the door behind us. He took off all his clothes only leaving on his underwear. So I did the same. He also had a boner, looked to be around 7 inches.

I pushed him on the bed and started to make out with him. He caved in and moaned, he was surprised but continued.

“Fuck i need you so bad.” He moaned. He took off his underwear wear.

I took a moment to look at his rock hard cock. God was it beautiful.

“Can I?” I ask for concent.

“Of course birthday boy, consider it your birthday present.” He smirked while I didn’t take a second to wrap my hand around his acing cock. I jerked it off for a few minutes, hearing Em moan, groan and moan out daddy a few times.

I stopped my movements at the right time and sat next to him,I didn’t even need to say anything and Em was on his knees in front of me taking my boxers off. He looked with a drooling mouth at my acing cock, he grabbed it with one hand. He took a deep breath, he was visibly nervous.

He started licking it, with very small licks. I groaned, saying fuck under my breath. He heard that and took it as a sign and started teasing my head, until finally sucking it. “Fuck, just like that baby.” I moaned, grabbing his head and taking over control.

Moments later I heard him moaning through the bobbing sounds. I started to get more rough with my movements, looking down on him getting red. I also saw him jerking himself off.

“Nrrrghh” I hear him as he cums, making a mess on the floor. “Fuckkk I’mmm coming!” I shout as ropes of my cum shoot down his throat, painting them white.

————

End.

[mrsmiagreer]

Let me take care of you

Warnings: None! Fluff :)

Characters: David Shaw × Gn!Angel

————————————————————————-

David had about 3 hours before he had to leave for work. Another late gig. He was doing some yard work while he was waiting for Angel to get off of work for the evening. He got a little distracted after a while, thinking of all the things they’ve done and all of the conversations they’ve had in this here yard. He thought about how he’s noticed they’ve been acting a little different lately. Work has been very hectic for them recently, and he could tell that the all nighters and mountains of paperwork were taking a toll on them. They’ve barely seen eachother lately and Angel seemed low on energy most of the time that they DID see eachother. He figured that he’d make them feel better before he had to head out today.

He waited at the door for Angel when he heard their car make the “lock” noise. He usually hated waiting at the door for them because they always made it a point to tell him that it’s dog behavior. He let out a dry chuckle and rolled his eyes at the thought. Today was different though, David knew when to put his pride aside.

“Hi Angel. How was work today?” David asked about as soon as the door opened.

“Oh hey Davey,” Angel yawned in response, which let David know all he needed to “Work was…work I guess. Were you…. waiting for me at the door?”

“Actually I was. I know how tired you’ve been recently and I wanted to help you relax a little”

Their eyes immediately lit up at the sound of his words. “Are you being..unapologetically romantic?! I mean, I don’t mind but it is a bit out of character..”

“Is it so weird that I want to relieve my fiancé of visible stress?” David sighed before gently taking their bag from them and picking them up bridal style. “Just come here and let me take care of you, you snot”

“Oh— Yes sir~”

Angel responded with a giggle. They smiled at the mention of fiancé. They liked the sound of that, and honestly couldn’t believe that it was real. They cuddled up to him on their way upstairs, silently gushing about how much they loved him, and how thoughtful this was. He was.

David laid them down in the bed and he laid with them, making sure to keep an eye on the time so he can make it on time. He played in Angel’s hair until they drifted off to sleep, wishing there was more he could do with the time he had. He mentally promised to make it up to them on their next day off.

In the quiet of his mate’s soft snores, he pictured how he would make them a nice dinner, run them both a warm bubble bath, give them a massage, he wished he could give them literally everything.

He nodded to himself to solidify that plan before checking the time, realizing that it’s time to go. He kissed Angel’s forehead and gently rolled out of the bed. He got ready and stood in their shared bedroom doorframe, doing his checklist and making sure he had everything. David took one more good look at Angel, deciding to go over to kiss them one more time before he left for the night.

“I love you, Angel. I promise i’ll give you a better night soon”

————————————————————————-

A/N: Hey guys! This is 1/5 of my drafted drabbles! Not really used to writing for the big guy but I Hope you enjoyed David 🫶🏽🥰

[soupserum]

SWMTBB [ 4 ]

crossposted on ao3 as per usual

Yanqing felt like he was going crazy. Listen- it had to be his imagination. A trick of the light, or the wind, or Zephyrus getting to him and making him all paranoid. He was probably just stressed from everything that had been going on.

He still couldn't shake the feeling of eyes. No matter where he turned or where he hid, there were always those goddamn eyes! Everywhere! They were everywhere! Yanqing groaned in frustration, flopping back onto the bed from where he had been pacing.

I think you're getting too frustrated over this. There's nothing we can do, so why bother wasting energy on hallucinations?

"That's easy for you to say!" Yanqing shivered, cutting himself off as his spine prickled, goosebumps visible on his arms. "I hate this."

You only started getting all paranoid after you started visiting that shrine. Maybe the leftover energy there is affecting you.

"I- ugh. I guess that makes sense. It doesn't feel like just another qi sickness, though! I know what that feels like, and this isn't it."

I think you're so used to qi sickness, you don't even notice the other symptoms and only feel the paranoia.

Yanqing didn't bother responding. He wouldn't be able to convince Zephyrus, anyway.

…

He wanted to go see the shrine.

Okay, okay, it sounded like a bad idea when he thought it like that, but… Ugh. Maybe Zephyrus was right. Maybe he shouldn't go.

He thought back to the wind, to the ̶w̶h̶i̶s̶p̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ leaves… It was terrifying. It was calling for him. He wanted to go back. To feel that presence, to hear those bells, to bring something new. He wanted to go-

Yanqing!

He jolted, sitting up straight and staring wide-eyed at the mirror, where Zephyrus stood with an unamused expression.

I've been talking to you for like 10 minutes now. Are you thinking about going back to that shrine? You're acting like the protagonist in a horror novel. Running back to the strange abandoned shrine where strange things happen that make you paranoid? Do you not see the problem in being drawn to it?

"I just- I-" Yanqing fumbled with his words.

You're being silly. We never would've even entertained this idea back there, and never even have gone back after the first time you saw it! It's only been how long, and you've already started running around like you're invincible. We don't know if we're going to be safe here or not.

Yanqing was silent for a moment, formulating his thoughts under Zephyrus' cold stare.

"...If Jing Yuan was going to hurt us, wouldn't he have done something already? I mean, there's probably very few people that know we're here. He's had a lot of time to show his true colors." …

"I don't think he wants to hurt us. Maybe we can relax a little bit, let your guard down-" Stop! You don't- we don't know that. Maybe he's safe, but better safe than sorry. If you get attached, you're going to get hurt! You've done this a thousand times before, and it's never been true! They've always wanted to hurt us!

"Those times- you know it wasn't my fault those times! You know what they were doing! Besides, it wasn't all of them. There was-" She might've been a fluke. You know as well as I do. Every single time you think it's just like one of your stupid fairytales, and every single time I have to pick up the pieces. 

"It's different this time! We're out of that place! This is different, this is the Luofu, they worship completely separate Aeons!" If a person is cruel, whichever Aeon they worship doesn't matter! You're being stupid, Ic-

"THAT'S NOT MY NAME!"

…

Yanqing didn't know when he had stood up, or why he had shouted at Zephyrus, who was standing stone-faced behind the glass. 

He was so tired of being afraid. Yanqing turned off the lights in the room and got in bed without another word. When he looked at the mirror again, Zephyrus was gone, and blessedly silent.

The footsteps leaving the door went unnoticed by both of them.

-

Jing Yuan seemed off today. Zephyrus was still quiet from their fight last night, so Yanqing couldn't ask him if he also noticed it. Jing Yuan kept throwing glances his way, like he was a stray cat who would flee at the slightest movement. Which was weird, because he stopped looking at him like that ages ago. What happened to change it?

After Jing Yuan left for work, Yanqing pushed that out of his mind. It didn't matter right now, and he had bigger things to worry about. Like the way the shadows were moving on the walls. If Zephyrus was here, he'd say something about him being paranoid, but he knew he wasn't paranoid!

He entered their room, sitting down at their desk and mentally preparing himself to try and fix his handwriting-

Where was the paper? He patted down the desk, searched everywhere within their room, but the paper & pencil had completely disappeared. He racked his memory for where he possibly could've left it- downstairs? Perhaps at the kitchen table, or the little table in the living room, where-

The shrine. 

He had left it at the shrine when he went to go offer incense.

He really did want to go back. It was very pretty there, anyway, overgrown like that with all the moss and the leaves and the vines and the flowers covering the shrine the wildflowers in all their pretty colors covered in all the moss and the green the slippery stones the daisies just like the white lilies just like his m-

…

Surely… surely nobody would notice if he took a few more sticks of incense down. Just a few. He needed to get the paper anyway, and it was rude to not bring an offering if he was already going over. 

It was fine. Just a quick visit and nothing more. Then he could go check out the bookshelves lining the hallway that he didn't have a chance to look at earlier. He hadn't been able to read a new book in ages.

Making up his mind, he opened the door and went downstairs, ignoring or avoiding every reflective surface he came across. Which was harder than you'd think, considering pictures and polished surfaces count too.

He picked out a different type of incense this time. Patchouli. He didn't know what that smelt like when burning, but it smelt good on the stick, and the name sounded pretty, so it was good enough. Pocketing the lighter and clutching the three sticks of incense in their hand, he returned to the path. It was strangely comforting, like he was returning home after a long absence. Maybe the thought of that should've made him uneasy, but he had always been the optimist.

The shrine sat there like it always had. He wondered, in the back of his mind, just how long it had been there. How many years, on this unchanging ship with these unchanging people?

He approached the altar to light the incense, hand reaching out for the forgotten paper as soon as the white was visible against the stones. He went to pocket the paper, quickly checking it for dirt stains-

He barely registered the paper fluttering to the ground and rejoining the pen. That- That had to have been Zephyrus playing a trick. Maybe he had possessed him when he wasn't paying attention? Or it could be Jing Yuan, trying to trick him into being paranoid so he can swoop in and save the day?

This- this couldn't be real- he had to be dreaming or- or something-

there was something tugging at the back of his mind- Zephyrus?- he can't breathe- no no no Zephyrus can't take over right now he's angry and upset- he wouldn't take over when he's that upset- what if it was the voices? he can't breathe- the things watching him- the things that wrote on the paper

he could feel himself being pulled backwards he can't breathe the void was so tempting-

nothing.

-

He couldn't leave ██████ alone for even a second. Aeons, of course this would happen. Zephyrus was going to give him such an earful when he calmed down from that panic attack.

In lieu of scolding ██████ he would just have to do some things he didn't have the chance to do earlier, when ██████ was too annoying to hand over control.

At this point, it was almost second nature to hide a food stash. There was so much food that he could take from the cabinets and hide in his little stashes, it was almost like a dream. Of course, he didn't just hide stashes in their room. There was another near the shrine ██████ loved so much. 

He was careful about it. Only a few pieces of food from each group, and he took from the back so it wouldn't be visible. The canned food was a different story. He took a lot of those, and he hid those in the spots near the shrine, hidden within the roots of abandoned trees.

When he was done, it was like nothing had ever happened! Jing Yuan would never notice, and hopefully ██████ would be none the wiser. It'd be hard to hide this important of a memory, but he'd hidden worse, so it would be fine. 

All that was left now was to wait for ██████ to wake up.

-

Nothing. It wasn't dark, because there was no light that would've made it dark. There was just nothing. It was peaceful. This was always the best part about letting Zephyrus take control-

Zephyrus took control!?

Well… that made sense, he guessed. Usually Zephyrus takes over when he has a panic attack. But this void didn't feel like the one he went to in the deep recesses of their shared mind. It felt different. Like instead of a nothingness created from him and Zephyrus' consciousnesses, it was created by a different set of consciousnesses.

He could barely bring himself to care, though. It was so quiet, so comforting. The endless loneliness. He could already feel himself drifting…

"Do you think he's awake yet?"

"Quiet, you idiot, you're going to scare him!-" Yanqing screamed at the top of his lungs, lashing out and getting as far away from the new presences as possible.

"Shit-" "Hey kid, it's okay, we aren't gonna hurt you!" One of the voices exclaimed, raising their hands in surrender.

Yanqing kept a safe distance, quickly scanning these people- three of them? A purple-haired foxian, seemingly female, white-haired… um… person, seemingly male, and a black-haired vidyadhara, also male. He did not trust these people. "Who the hell are you people?!" He insisted, trying to seem more intimidating than he probably was. Zephyrus was way better at that.

"We're, um." The vidyadhara began, before being cut off by the foxian.

"We're really sorry for scaring you! We were the spirits in the shrine you've been visiting. The gifts you've brought have helped us regain consciousness instead of just sleeping, and we wanted to talk to you for real, but, um, we ended up scaring you instead. Sorry…" "For the record, it was her idea." The white-haired person input.

Okay. He could work with this. They weren't spirit-sent assassins from back there. Just normal spirits. That he accidentally awoke. Ah, what did he get himself into… "And can I ask the name of the spirits I've accidentally awoken?" He inquired, putting as much wariness and disdain into his tone as he could. It didn't seem to be working. The foxian smiled at him. "My name is Baiheng."

interactions appreciated <3

[theaenetworks]

EPISODE 2

He came very close so that I could hear the skipping of his heart.

“Are you okay”, he asked, scrutinizing me.

I drew back, my stinking self was a huge contrast to his heavily scented self.

“Yes”, I whispered.

From his expression I noticed he was not convinced but I was not bothered.

“Are you from this village? he asked.

I felt utterly embarrassed, for reasons I can’t even explain.

“I don’t know”, I retorted rudely and walked away.

He stood puzzled, watching me as I walked out of him.

I felt fulfilled, I end up embarrassing him before he do that to me.

————————————————————————-

“Mother how are you feeling now? I asked smiling. It was quite obvious that she is gradually recuperating. I was so excited.

“I’m getting better now, my daughter”, Mother said sitting up. I supported her back with a pillow to enable her relax properly.

“God bless the Samaritan woman, she must be very wealthy to fund all our bills, I exclaimed.

“Ijeoma, you need to see how everybody is praying, smiling and showering praises on her. I heard, she usually come every year to do that, mostly on her birthdays. She paid for all the patients in the ward including me. My saviour never fails”, Akunne said raising her hands to the sky.

“Mother, I was very surprised when I returned to the doctor only to be told that our hospital bills have been taken care of including your drugs and check-ups. I was astounded. It has been my dream, to put smiles on the faces of the needy, just like her but how can I achieve that, when I dropped out of school few months ago”, I said, feeling sad.

“Everything will be fine, my daughter. You need to see through this phase. You will go back to school very soon, be strong for us okay?

I looked at Mother and nodded, probably to make her feel better but inside me was a void waiting to be filled.

————————————————————————-

“Son! are you there? Ma Gladys asked as he knocked on his door.

Collins opened the door to meet the worried face of his Nanny. she had served the household for twenty seven years, since he was born.

“Mother, I will be out shortly”, he quickly answered.

He calls her “Mother”.

Fifteen minutes later, he was seated in the dinning room.

“Your favourite today, rice and plantain”, Ma Gladys said smiling as she dished out the food.

Collins chuckled.

“I perceived the aroma when I returned from work, I knew you were up to something”, he said faking a smile.

“Son, I noticed you have not been cheerful as you used to be these days. Are you having a hard time at work, or you’re still brooding over your father’s death. Did Mom come up with any troubles again? she asked visibly concerned.

“No, none of these, Mother. I’m okay, I guess it’s all stress”, he quickly answered.

“Son, I know you too well. I raised you myself so I know when you’re not feeling fine, Gladys said peering into his eyes.

“Speak up son, I’m willing to help”.

“Okay, Mother, I think I’m in love”, Collins said, softly.

STAY GLUED FOR EPISODE 3

Written by Mmesoma Nwobodo

https://anthonyemmanuel.com/mmeso-inspires-be-mine-episode-2/

#story #storytelling #storytime #storyteller #stories #storytellingphotography #africanstorytelling #africanstory

[wild-at-mind]

I always hated those OCD awareness posts that were like 'you might think OCD is about cleaning and neatness, but actually its about [entirely different cluster of OCD symptoms that the op has]'. Like, I know it's a stereotype that all OCD is about cleanliness and neatness, and that's annoying as it's incorrect, but you understand that some people's OCD actually is about cleanliness and neatness right? And there was often a weird kind of competitive one-upmanship involving intrusive thoughts, because it's easy for non-sufferers to understand why they are upsetting if you say what they are. I saw posts like 'oh you think OCD is about cleanliness and neatness? Well actually it's about [specific example of a very upsetting intrusive thought]!' With the implication of 'omg I wish it was JUST cleanliness and neatness!' Because that's the 'useful' OCD. The implication also being that people with cleanliness and neatness compulsions don't feel distress to do with their compulsions. A lot of these posts remained in stereotype land while trying not to be, though I guess it's good to talk about intrusive thought OCD- it really is under talked about.

I have cleanliness OCD, though now I'm able to live alone it's died down to manageable levels and the morality based OCD stuff has sprung up in its place. Cleanliness OCD does not have to mean your whole living space is visibly super clean, FYI. Maybe it's focused on one area, or several, and they might be quite useless. For me, I have a lot of problems with drying racks for the dishes. I need to leave my dishes on them in their particular places, to drain dry. If someone else moves them off or rearranges, I freak out internally because they are dirty now, and if i get the chance I rewash them. It's always been that way. One time at in my uni house my housemate's church people came over and decided to 'help' by putting all the dishes on the rack away. I freaked out and had to wash everything again. It was embarrassing. When my bf comes over he often insists on doing the dishes but it stresses me out so much I usually just do them. It sucks because its one of my least favourite household chore and one he is happy to take. I guess we'll find out of there's a workaround when we finally live together.

[pantherlover]

An Artificial Night Re-Read: Part 4

Hello again! Here's part 4.

Chapter Twelve:

Man, Quentin really threw himself into the deep end re: quests, didn't he? The last book he was only supposed to tag along to figure out what was going on with January, and then just refused to leave when people started dying; this one he snuck into Toby's car and made the Luidaeg let him tag along. (Also, *how* did that meeting go?) Toby might've honed Quentin's bullheaded heroic tendencies, but they're definitely all his.

Spike is the *best* sidekick; I hope he gets the best fertilizer after this.

Chapter Thirteen:

This book has made me more interested in Amandine than I've ever been before, if only because I'm very curious now about a) the specifics of the prophecy about Amandine's line and b) when she started hiding that she was a Firstborn. Acacia says that Amandine was 'very... visible, once. Before her choices were made.' I'm guessing that this doesn't refer to Amandine becoming a Faerie Bride after August disappeared, because Acacia didn't know that Amandine had had a second daughter. Could this possibly refer to refusing to stop Blind Michael's Ride?

@figmentera mentioned that the 'road' Blind Michael (in chpater 11) said Amandine set aside was referring more to the prophecy about her bloodline than a literal road, which feels more and more likely the more she gets brought up. Which makes me a little curious about when the last Ride happened; I assume that it would've had to have happened while August wasn't in the picture, because then the prophecy wouldn't have depended on Amandine filling it.

Chapter Fourteen:

I'm not sure why Toby's so mad about Quentin sneaking into her car to follow her to the Luidaeg's; that absolutely sounds like something teenage Toby would've done. (On second thought, that might be why she's so mad!)

Quentin's a great squire; even when he's confused by what Toby's doing, he'll back her up when she needs it.

Oh, Jessica's so *happy* to see Toby in this book; I'm so sad that she died still being scared of Toby.

Chapter Fifteen:

'Spike trailed us to the edge of the trees before stopping, clearly intending to stay where it was most needed.' Seriously, Spike is the BEST sidekick.

'[Quentin] was Daoine Sidhe, and the smell of mortal blood was strong enough to be almost choking. He should have smelled it before I did. So why didn't he?' More hints that Toby wasn't what she thought she was!

Reading about Katie's partial transformation reminds me that Seanan McGuire can be SUPER terrifying.

Chapter Sixteen:

'Five of the older kids were busy lashing bundles of sticks together as they finished Helen's litter, and there were sentries posted in the trees, almost invisible through the leaves until you walked under them.' Raj did SUCH a good job organizing the kids. I hope Tybalt makes sure that Raj knows how well he did.

''...I almost envied [Helen]. Whether we lived or died, the pressure wasn't on her. She was taking care of the children and leaving the heroics to Raj - and to me. Lucky us.' Honestly I think this is pretty unfair of Toby? Calming that many kids down in such a stressful situation is HARD, especially when she must've also been freaking out, and Raj definitely wouldn't have been able to rally the kids if the youngest ones were panicking. Helen was doing more than enough to make sure everyone made it out.

'[Karen] gestured frantically, and i realized with dim horror that I could see through her. In my experience, see-through people are usually dead.' I have two questions about this. 1) Toby mentioned in Be the Serpent that the older Karen got, the more time she would spend sleeping. Does this mean she can project herself so people can see her when they're awake? Or will she only be able to visit people while they're sleeping? 2) Can the fae be ghosts/spirits, or is Toby referring to her mortal side re: see-through people?

'The Luidaeg was on the other side, white-eyed and frantic, with ashes in her hair.' WHAT was going on on the Luidaeg's side???

I'm not gonna lie, Toby pushing the kids through the door felt very '101 Dalmatians' to me.

I bet all of these kids hear that the Luidaeg is supposed to be a terrifying monster and just. Refuse to believe it. Nope, that's the nice lady that let us cry all over her kitchen floor, she's not scary!

'"You need to get these brats out of here. I can't stand kids."' This is somehow the truth (because the Luidaeg can't lie) and the biggest lie we've ever heard her say.

I *love* that Danny's voice message already has info about Barghest rescue.

That's it for this part! I'm going to try to get these out a little faster (guueeeessss who just realized she only has 10 days until the next book comes out!) but we'll see how it goes. See you next time!

[adelaidedrubman]

2, 11, 27, 29, and 46 for johnjessie?

THANK YOU VERBS these were very fun to do for the normcore couple!!

2. Who wakes up early/Who sleeps in late? 

john wakes up earliest, consistently. unless it’s a day jessie plans to go fishing, then — just kidding john wakes up first then too, but it’s from jessie’s 4 AM alarm, as she proceeds to sleep through it and the next ten that follow it, and any effort of his to wake her. 

11. How do they feel about nicknames/pet names? If they like them, what pet names do they use? If they hate them, why do they feel that way? 

john called jessie “little red” exactly once before about-facing and radioing her the same day “OMG just kidding you’re actually the biggest, strongest person in the entire world haha wouldn’t it be funny if you crushed me with your giant muscles 🥺” and never really attempting a pet name again from that point. also driven by the setting in of his obsessive focus on simply learning her first name at all, and while what he does finally learn is technically a nickname he is also so dedicated to flaunting it as the world’s best prize to himself that he doesn’t bother to dress it up with any additional sweet talk. just jessie. that’s so incredible. (i guess spoilery and of note is that he will continue to call her “jessie” even after he learns her full name, because he knows she prefers it. something something symbolism). the most he ever does is tack on the occasional “jessie, dear” or “my jessie.”

jestiny throws out a stray “baby” or few in the heat of the moment, which is of course so taunting and belittling and not at all meant to make him feel like her most special baby boy. don’t get it twisted he would be so dumb to think that. other than that, it’s just “john” or “that fucking guy��

27. How do they say “I love you” non-verbally? 

managing to be comfortably non-verbal at all is an unprecedented miracle and massive “i love you” in and of itself with them. 

but also jessie will pause the rough handling to just look at him and give stray, unusually tender and doting touches — forehead kisses, tracing his freckles with her fingers, etc. john tends to full body cling, absentmindedly tangle fingers in her hair, touch her dimples when they’re visible. also mutual just constantly reaching for each other and finding ways to be in each other’s space. and these wild sons of guns do be holding hands. 

29. Describe their nighttime routine. 

fall asleep in THE DIRT. john snores so loud jessie thinks he’s a sleep paralysis demon for a sec then goes back to sleep. yeah they do this every night why not 

(real nighttime routine varies a bit by exact living circumstances, but usually consistents of jessie busying herself with something well into the night, john pestering her to come to bed already. then finally initiating sex in an effort to get her to the bedroom, never actually ends up in the bedroom because she is So Spiteful and Will Not Be Manipulated and he is too dumb and horny to have any follow through on his own plan. they go to bed anyways after but she has to Prove A Point first. yeah they do this every night) 

46. Do they consider their relationship casual or serious? Is the answer different depending on who you ask? Why?

they are both super fun super casual people known for being chill, laid-back, and having measured emotional reactions and attachments. which for her part jessie is actually deluded enough to believe about herself, she swears anything between them was a momentary lapse in judgment that means nothing. they just did Hand Stuff (she has not gone ten minutes without thinking about him) it was basically Church Camp Shit (she is actively hallucinating him as a coping mechanism to make her other hallucinations less stressful). 

john for his part is less in denial about that piece, while he occasionally downplays or obfuscates the motivations behind his obsession he has never once denied that she is the world’s specialest most importantest girl. “his world [had] been shaken to its foundations, cleaved in twain and hollowed out and rebuilt from its core to be filled with her” - guy who got jerked off and learned a woman’s first name. he thinks they’re pretty serious, yeah. 

[lais-a-ramos]

a bit of sunday night venting

[under the cut]

so, i usually try to not expose my deeper family issues online, except maybe some vague stuff and technical terms on DMs once in a while, when explaining why i relate to certain fictional characters

well, here we go

my father sort of has a long-time drinking problem

it's been like this ever since i can remember

and, no need to worry, he is not violent at all

but the situation still inspires a lot of care, like he was a little kid or a middle schooler or something, and has put me from a young age in some type of role reversal in many ways, taking up a responsability that, now, thanks to therapy and also some reading on my own, i know a child shouldn't have

well, every weekend he does his typical binge-drinking

but today he's drank even more than his usual, and that usually correlates with some type of stress he can't voice

and, well, i think that today it happened bc last week, on thursday, he went to the ophthalmologist and the doctor diagnosed him with cataract

yep. cataract

and, sure, it's a treatable illness, usually with prescribed glasses and surgery

but this might still cost us a bit of money, in the case he needs surgery

and, sure, we can also try on the public healthcare system

problem is, the public system is very neglected by the authorities, with one of it's biggest problems being the long time ppl oftenly have to spend on the waiting lists for surgeries

my dad knows a guy that halped him get a surgery for his older sister, so, chances are he might get that for himself as well if the situation demands

but, you know, it's still a very complicated and delicate situation

whenever my dad drinks he oftenly skips meals like lunch or dinner

it's cost so much in terms of the quality of his relationship with my mom and also with me and my big sister

particularly with our mom, she gets so visibly frustrated, and yet never divorced as if she was still waiting for the guy she married to come back

and today has been another one of these very stressful and melancholic weekends, like a sysiphus task or an eternal return or a time loop

except a bit worse this time around, bc one of cataract's risk factors, besides the diabetes that runs in both maternal and paternal sides of my family, alcohol abuse is one of the risk factors

so, he's trying to forget his problems with something that actually just makes them worse in a multitude of ways

and that hurts us all so much...

like i said above, it's been like this since i can remember...

i've built, like, enough emotional tools and strategies when i had the opportunity of the free therapy in the university nearby, so i can sort of get by even without being able to access the therapy now (it seems like the program was dropped, since i have yet to hear from them for months now)

but that is still a bit heavy and hard to deal with at times, and i needed to take that off my chest a bit i guess

anyways...

hopefully tomorrow i'll feel better, and be back to yapping about my blorbos. fingers crossed 🤞🏾

[jonathankatwhatever]

It’s 24 July 2024, which is lovely to look at, days and years identified over months, centuries, and millennia. What is a grid square? I saw the answer in a Metaphoric Bundle a few days ago. I’ve been trying to focus on it since, but I’m having trouble with that process: everything cuts off quickly, and that invokes the spreading of a K form appearing on the szK, so the corners of each grid square form. This layers grid squares over each other, with the simplest example being the Bip layer in which we take a grid and connect the Bips to make another grid. In easier words, it’s a grid offset so the corners of one are at the center of the other. This does not have to happen in ‘flat’ projection: an example is gsPyramids, which generates the Bip pole or axis through a grid square.

As you can see, when magnified, this generates permutations which reach End to End over that fD-like form. We usually use fD in Triangular, so I’m not sure what to call one drawn over a gsPyramid. It’s Triangular over gs, and that has the two implications - pardon my excitement - that Triangular draws on the outside of the gs or on the inside. That is perhaps unclear because it came in a flash. Triangular draws over gs refers to the operation of Triangular within a Thing field. When Triangular draws within a gs, then it fits the field to the Thing as the inside of the containment (used because it references so many ideas, like JvN universes). That enables the inside perspective, meaning the Thing’s perspective. As in, imagine a gnat flying around your exposed ankles. That models to this same image because it’s a pairing of a large object with a triviality which demands some degree of attention, like a star and a planet.

I just saw a disaster flick in which Jupiter explodes, killing all life on Earth. The thread went: Sun feels planet tug, rotation of Jupiter seen in rings, the stresses enable bleeding from within, visible as a red spot, and then it became sci-fi with either Jupiter being blown up or going through the whole ‘observations of Jupiter show …’ movie. All in a few seconds.

Triangular inside gs. It constructs in gsPyramidal space. Has to because otherwise it is in 0Space with the irrationals. What does that look like? It’s the series of gsPyramids and thus of that fD form, with HG form appearing as the fD reflects or rotates to that ideal. You can see what Coordinate Rotation is now, which is exciting. It’s the 1Space relation of the contextual relationships which meet at an End, and this enables us to, for example, look at a figure skater as see a jump which we can count and score as a whole while examining in extreme slow-motion each aspect and each perfect or imperfect movement and reaction as the jump actually occurred. At larger scale, you can map wars based on whose army goes where in what time, with each movement along the way existing both as part of the whole and as its own moment.

That finally grounds CR properly. It needed gsPyramids.

I’m seeing an End with 1 or 2 gsPyrimids that shift around, and you’d think they’d collide but they don’t because they can overlap within a Thing. I guess that means this maps a Thing as a gsPyramid moving infinitely fast so the face of the pyramid draws a sphere. Or a sphere of sorts because each spot is actually a gs but they get tiny or very large, disappearing in either direction into a point. Large is a point in the sense of the point at infinity; it’s the implied point when you go big. That’s a very nice statement.

This largely translates the MB. Came as a complete surprise to me.

I spent a big portion of yesterday reading about infidelity. It took a while to realize I’d already heard all these story elements in my head. That meant a finite threading potential. I saw some were voices or decision pathways generated by bad wiring, meaning responses to abuse or to inheritance of either traits or combinations of traits. An interesting one was a guy broke up with his relatively long-term girlfriend when he learned that she was going slow with him, because she saw him as relationship material, while having sex with another guy. There are female equivalents. These are interesting because it’s a counting issue, a version of 1 and 0, meaning he counted the relationship as being 1 when she was counting it as 0 or she was counting it as -1 to 0 or the like. Not sure how to reconcile that: each projects into the constructed space negative to positive so each counts to the relationship ‘pole’ and he was there in this example but she wasn’t.

The sense of betrayal in that story is interesting. In trust terms, it’s about readability and togetherness: if one perceives them as being on the same page while the other does not, then in most cases it doesn’t matter, like a gnat whose bite itches but goes away, while others are more fundamental to the relationship, meaning trust in not only fidelity but in the ability to see that in the other. That’s where - sorry, the cat keeps knocking the screen over - we see Triangular over and inside gs. You can see this across dimensions: yes or no choices like kids, where you live, family involvements, work, friends, inappropriate behaviors, addictions, etc. Each is a bundle of permutations and can be seen as a sheaf, referring to topology and abstract algebra attaching these contextual processes, which invokes fCM decision-making.

It’s been very difficult for me to work through this material. I hate having thoughts of betrayal in me, and they’re very difficult to analyze because they pull at non-verbal permutations, meaning they invoke intense imagery. This suddenly reminds me of a fundamental lesson in my existence here: the realization that the great flashing light in my head about my left hand was meant to attract attention, not to deflect it. I remember the moment: I was standing in a converted garage playing pool and it was cold enough that when I picked up the balls I could feel a difference between my hands in a new light, one which said ‘the only difference is that it feels different’, meaning drop the negative associations of damaged, weak, dependent. Looking at my betrayal fears has been a similar process, though I can’t know the outcome because I am a Thing.

At least I have been able to formalize the ideas better. Example is those who think they can. This comes from not understanding how Actualities Register, that you can’t escape or hide who you are and what you do because each you is a Thing, and you are described in the Registry. Not quite the same idea as written in the Book of Life idea, but similar.

This also reaches judgment, a topic that has also been in my mind lately. The old idea is that judgement is algorithmic, that it’s imposed on each Thing. That is correct. But that’s 1Space. Stories about judgement are Triangular inside, meaning they occur within that universe. This is true for individuals and for groups and for all.

How do you stand the pressure of that? Must be terrifying. It has been to me. The feeling that a lapse has such consequences. And I don’t exactly face a lot of temptation, especially since I intentionally wall myself off from it as it becomes visible. Except for injuring myself doing too much, and I may be improving on that, given I have now lifted for over 2 weeks every day with only good effects. I’m actually being careful and I’m paying no attention to what others do.

I think I’ve been stalling to avoid saying what I keep hearing in my head, that while individuals and some groups ‘go to heaven’, it’s a contextual heaven, a D4-3 heaven. That means it’s destructible, which is why in one portion of the Mission Storyline, we are here: to see if a connection can be made from the larger field, from the Triangular over gs which includes this universe (and the set of universes within). If that connection is positive, then that heaven becomes connected over the Boundary so the D4-3 construction Attaches to the larger universe which contains it.

This point or step or whatever you call it is, I’m almost sorry to say, a direct reflection of the way the Boundary reflects at Things what the Things see in the Boundary. In eternal concepts, people see versions of God which justify all sorts of terrible horrible acts and thoughts, and they think that’s holy because they see themselves reflected.

I need to stop for a while. Need to move around.

[lastoneout]

Okay, so before I became disabled I used to work at a movie theater in a small-ish city with this one pediatric dentist who's clinic I guess must have been serving like every single fucking family in the area based on how many ads I always saw, and he had a habit of renting out three or four theaters every six months or so and inviting all of his patients and their families to see whatever big kids movie had just come out.

And bro went so hard on this that he would hire people to come who would dress up as the movie's characters for the families to take photos with like it was a goddamn theme park(I'm guessing like serious hobby actors/cosplayers or something, it was a college town I'm sure there were people doing that), and so he got Belle for the Beauty and the Beast live action release, shit like that. But this rental was for one of the Minion movies and I assume he just couldn't find someone with a good costume...and to preserve the tradition(and stay on his patients' good side) he instead got some like eight year old kid in the most god-awful Minion costume I've ever seen. Like it was clearly home-made, it didn't look anywhere near as nice as the princesses he'd found, and so for the whole event there was just a random little kid in this creepy homemade mascot-style minion costume who....hung out and let people take pictures with them.

Before I continue, I need to stress, you could not see the kid's face, there was mesh in the center of the eye that they could see through, but you could not see their human body-parts aside from their legs. (The thing didn't even have arm holes idk why.)

Also, in the interest of honesty, I'm not usually get bothered by uncanny valley stuff. I'm not scared of mascots or clowns or anything like that, animatronics and puppets don't bother me, I don't think the kids in The Polar Express look weird, but this kid. Idk there was just something OFF about them.

Anyway I was a team leader and my shift that day was Hall, which meant I was just there to make announcements in the full theaters(turn off your phones, take your kid out if they start crying, ect.) and help with managing lines, answer guest questions, do restroom checks if the ushers are busy, ect., which we needed because again this dentist rented out like four huge auditoriums and invited half the goddamn town, and thus I was around this kid...more than I would have liked to be.

And I think they could tell*.

Because after the films had started and the lobby was mostly clear we accidentally ended up standing across from each other, like fifteen feet or so, and I hadn't noticed them until, all the sudden, I get this awful feeling like I'm being watched. Have you ever been able to tell something is making Direct Eye Contact with you despite you not being able to see it's eyes? It was like that. I quickly deduced it was the kid and just kinda froze staring at them while trying to figure out why I'd suddenly ended up in a horror movie, several tense seconds passing as they looked directly at me and I looked directly at their horrifying creepy little painted minion eye...

And then they lunged at me, like they were going to break into a run, and I swear to god my life flashed before my eyes. I have never been that scared, and I have severe anxiety. For a brief moment all of my higher thought vanished, leaving naught but a primal, screaming instinct that something Human Shaped But Very Much Not Human was coming DIRECTLY for my ass with violent intent, which made me visibly flinch and almost scream, and let me just say it is a very good thing that kid did not actually run at me because my brain tends to lean 'fight' when the fight/flight/freeze kicks in, and I absolutely would have instinctually punted their ass across the lobby and been fired immediately had they gotten too close to me.

But they didn't, thankfully. They did, however, get the satisfaction to scaring the absolute shit out of me with fucked up mind games in a way I will never truly recover from, and wherever they are now I hope they're happy with themselves for that.

(*I think most people were creeped out by them and they clearly had no say in doing this and also didn't get to go watch the movie with the other kids afaik, and I'm sure they weren't paid, so I do feel bad for them. They may have fucked with me in a mean way but it was probably only because they were bored and who here hasn't considered psychologically torturing strangers to stave off boredom? I have ADHD and I absolutely would have been pulling that shit in their place. Like it was understandable even if it did scar me for life. I get it.)

re: those last two posts once at work I got the fear of god put into me by a child in a shitty minion costume and to this day it's one of the few times I genuienly feared for my life(that didn't have to do with my stupid fucking OCD)

[hayiesli]

A story of Kevin Hayes Li

If living means striving for the best for the future, is it true that Kevin Hayes has been dead for so long? Shadows of his past still clung to him whether he was around coffee, tea, or even books that he had read again and again. Even if he did everything he could to distract himself by doing random work all over the place, everything would still be visible. Time and again.

Even when Seraphina made it to the college’s beauty pageant. The magnificence of the floodlights and the camera flash constantly focusing on Seraphina have a glimpse into his past. About how his big birthday bash at Marina Sands Bay piqued the public’s interest. Thousands upon thousands of commentaries and debates merge into one, but that was what he enjoyed—the life that Kevin Hayes Li once enjoyed.

“You don’t look happy?”

A quiet voice interrupted his echo. There were a lot of blooms in her hands. Her eyes sparkled more brightly than the crown on top of her head could ever hope to match.

“What you mean? I’m happy.”

“Work?”

“Not a bit.”

“The past?”

“Your beauty allows me to forget everything.”

“Buaya!”

Not at all, Sera. He was telling the truth. All of his anger and pain from the past vanished the moment he met you. You have the power to brighten the day even more than the bouquet of flowers you in your hands. You are everything he wishes to keep for his forever.

Kevin assisted Seraphina with her belongings, loaded them into the car, and drove her home. Yes, it wasn’t his car. His monthly salary was barely enough to cover his family’s basic needs. Instead of buying a car, he preferred to set aside the money to have quality time with Seraphina. Sometimes it’s books he’s been meaning to get his hands on.

Seraphina was babbling away because she was the oldest participant and found it hard enough to talk to the younger. When others got close to liking the same idol, she got to talk with all of them because they wanted to know what it was like to be her age. In particular, they wanted to know if the quarter-life crisis had also struck a lady with million privileges who had made good use of them.

“And your answer?”

“Of course, yes. Many of the things I actually feel stress me out more than my doubts. I question every step I take, my past. I’m not sure what kind of project I’m working on. Not even sure what kind of relationship is bonding..” she was silent for a moment, “..me.”

The car was only filled with songs that were deliberately turned on to break the silence. Seraphina, who is always bubbling around Kevin, suddenly regrets what she said to the lad she thought was just focused in the street. There was no reaction from him, and it was another guess that didn’t go wrong.

They were enveloped in total silence until they reached Seraphina’s house. The house isn’t so big yet there’s people who are very warm to each other. Kevin Hayes could never be able to feel it again. The warmth. Completeness.

All belonged to a lady who was busy hauling her own luggage out of the trunk, as if a man nearby would not assist her in any way.

He immediately offered assistance by lifting her suitcase. Didn’t forget the few bouquets she snatched at the sight. She’s moping. Kevin was well aware of this. He also knew that what she was saying wasn’t just meant to be heard, but also responded to. It’s just that he couldn’t think of anything to say when he realised they were in different worlds. Seraphina lived in a warm, crowded world, whereas Kevin lived in a lonely, cold one. He believed that what connected their worlds was simply impossibleness.

There was no wave or goodbye like she usually gave Kevin. Seraphina grabbed the car keys and walked away from him, oblivious to the fact that he was still standing in front of her fence.

“See you tomorrow, my love.”

Seraphina then turned to Kevin with widened eyes, a mixture of surprise and curiosity evident in her expression. Kevin, with both hands in his trouser pockets, only smiled, which also made Seraphina smile slightly.

“See you, love.”