#i just dont know. theres no escape
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GUYSSSS i need to live in a little truck please its importamt for my mental health. i dont a want to see my family
#idk why i just spent so much on ac just to wanna move. i guess i need ac for the summer because its gonna get hot#and i gained weight and the world is getting hotter#but that was the last of my savings which i used to save up for a camper...#but i will start saving again maybe if i get a job#LOOK i had this moral dillema: its so not eco friendly to live in a car. BUT! so many people just drive around and life aint perfect#what does me having one car do? i may be morally opposed to cars and not have a car otherwise but i wanna live in a car#its also expensive as hell. it will be more expensive than living with my family but less expensive than renting#bruh nvm i dont wanna live in a car and pay for shit sorry. ugh idk#i just dont know. theres no escape#i think i wanna live in a trailer maybe
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Even with TBOB and thisisnotawebsite.com there's... Still so much we don't know about Bill. Like ok yeah he's given a tragic background, we know a bit more about his henchmaniacs, but we really don't know a lot. Like, what happened directly after he accidentally destroyed his dimension? It isn't said. Sure time baby KNOWS about Bill's destruction of his dimension, but it seems like he didn't show up after Bill's dimension was destroyed to apprehend him because he only knows about Bill after Bill tries to make a deal with him, causing Bill's wanted poster. And how did Bill become basically the overlord of the nightmare realm, and gather all his henchmaniacs? Like there's a good period where we just don't know. And it's implied he's shocked and horrified (likely even dissociates, since he does that) after he destroys his dimension. But his characterization doesn't seem by that point to be one that immediately goes into a self-destructive, violent god-becoming maniacal spiral of self hatred; it's more one to be overwhelmed with grief and spend a good long time in the midst of his grief, then necessarily he's about to DO anything. And generally speaking trope wise, there's steps missing; typically in this sort of scenario, the usual progression is this:
characterized as monster due to being different in some way
tries to prove their not
ends up hurting someone anyways
gets further villainized, and antagonized by others
Acceptance of being a monster, and goes okay? You wanted a monster? I'll be a monster.
Now this fits Bill's early life, up to number 4, but we don't know what happens immediately after. It's possible he just went into his spiral immediately after, but it feels wrong, because it is missing the part of someone further villainizing him beyond himself which causes him to lash out due to the expectation (and internalized) idea that he would cause harm. I'd assume maybe some kind of interdimensional authority showed up and accused him of purposely trying to kill his dimension, which triggered his "okay, then I'll be a monster", or even a situation where his 'monstrosity' through the badge of killing his dimension is garners him respect. Considering that his henchmaniacs are chosen out of monstrosity and violence as a badge of honor, it feels very much like this would make sense, except none of them really know about Bill's dimension. He doesn't brag about the violence of it; he only calls it a liberation, contrary to the idea that Bill ever used it to gain clout. Instead, it's more likely that an interdimensional authority showed up and accused Bill, except from circumstances, it doesn't seem like it was Time Baby, so not sure who it would be... but at the same time, that expectation is often required for the character to truly embrace their 'monstrosity' and become truly violent. Or perhaps it was delayed after the destruction of his dimension, later when he begins to run with his henchmaniacs and disregards the law, but that also doesn't feel satisfactory for character development. Or perhaps I'm just overthinking this trope...
Also, how did he have his powers? Some is clearly stuff he's always had; pyrokinesis from that one rhyme, the ability to see into 3d, and he was somehow able to destroy his dimension by whatever he did to let Euclydians see the stars (telekinesis?), but beyond that? Was he always all-seeing? How did he become a 'dream demon'? Are his deals actually binding or does he lie? Are these things that he acquired later, because Euclydians seem to be written about as if they usually don't have any of these abilities, nor the abilities Bill is known to have when young, nor did Bill seem to be able to be all seeing when he was younger. Plus, how was Bill able to survive the destruction of his dimension, if he's technically made of the same stuff as everyone else, who all seems to have a physical form? Why then does he seems to be characterized as a being made of pure energy and thought; is that just in Earth's dimension, or does he have a physical form within the nightmare realm? There's multiple things that are contradictory about his body (mouth-eye, yet talked about removing his exoskeleton to feed--not sure exactly when this was mentioned--plus his mouth located under his bricks and bowtie in his exoskeleton in journal 3). But he seems so thrilled by his physical form though on earth, and we know that physical forms exist within the Nightmare realm as Ford was in it... yet it seems like hes characterized to have no physical form, so did he perhaps lose his physical form when his dimension died? Did he technically die with them too, but with his powers was able to survive essentially as a ghost like he tells Dipper you become without a body?
#hugin rambles#hugin rambles gf#bill cipher#the book of bill#tbob spoilers#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#gravity falls#gravity falls meta#bill ci the triangle guy#theres so many questions and i get part of it is just not explained and likelye never will be and thats also FUN to play with#but its also super curious because there is a v large time where you DONT know a pivotal part of Bill's existence. like he presumably also#dated a howling void? when does that fit in or is it another bit?#but like... the implications about his power and his form and euclydia burning. like fuck#also putting my chips on he was accused directly after and escaped the authorities. and has been chased since and he was like well okay ill#be fucking monster then actively#although it is an interesting thought experiment if it was slowly over time it snowballed into him having a god-complex#also like LOVE getting into how magic works. like okay tell me the technical details. fanfics which go into this i devour with delight#is he an actual demon or it is it just classed as he makes deals? are these deals binding? is it also something that then peovides hik with#power in that sense? oughhh so many good questions.#trying not to feel like Ford excitedly pulling out a clipboard to record all my theories and failing whoops#also like im aware parts of this will be not accurate and perfectly smooth for Bill's powers and char development because its always been#predicated on whats funnier rather then it being a self-formed idea fully fleshed at the beginning of the series
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various spencer stickers/transparent pngs from made from editing and transparentifying askblog drawings
#sorry for the lack of new art! im working on school lately >.<#in the meantime have these and do as you wish with them#well. idk dont use my art for anything . morally reprehensible#but i think i can trust you guys... right?#btw most of these were edited minimally but you might notice the bottom middle one looks a lot different from the original image#because i hated the way it looked but really liked the idea of the expression and pose with spencer. works well as a sticker#so i gave it another try and changed some stuff on his face#if you're curious i'll spare you the spot the difference game. i slimmed his face shape and redrew the eyebrows. and gave him a normal mout#instead of kitty#also i know the fullbody one look weird the way tumblr crops it theres just no escaping that.#i either post it next to a shorter image or i post it in its own row and it makes the post really long and awkward like that one stingy pos#anyways.#venturiantale#taleblr#spencer acachalla#images that are horrid to see and look at#mspaint#venturiantale fanart#fanart
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the last unicorn post from earlier has me thinking about the master. that yana is still in there, you know? is still someone he was, if even for a brief flash across the life of a time lord. there’s no way to unlive that life. there are ways to twist it later, sure, to make utopia into hell on earth. but the life was lived. in much the same way that the doctor can remember, can feel, the love he held onto as john smith even as that life is ripped out of his hands. the doctor choose denial and then grief and then to shutter it all away. and so john smith died, and so professor yana died, and the doctor and the master live on. the doctor has done this before, and he lives in orbit around humanity, trying to keep the best parts of them and hold them deep enough to take root (which he can pretend he gets to choose, as a time lord. as a human, it all floods in and can’t be dug back out.) but what about the master, right?
to borrow a turn of phrase: i think there are two time lords left in the universe, and they both learned how to regret.
#regret here meaning less feeling the emotion of actual regret obviously because time lords do not actually funxtion on unicorn rules. they#already get sad just fine on their own. no humanity needed for that.#but i dont know. i just dont think he brushed it off so easily. i think he did a hell of a job convincing himself he did.#and what better way then to twist his own great works and destroy the species he was working so hard to save at the end of the universe.#but what about the knowledge that he *could* be that person. that somewhere in him exists a version that wanted to save people.#a version that is painfully too much like the doctor. even. now is that part worse or better than the human part?#but if past regenerations are ghosts i think yana deserves a haunt.#anyway maybe ignore this one im rambling about nothing here#theres just. i dont know. what if you were the last of your kind and in surviving you made yourself Not Like Them in a way you’ll never#escape.#i mean doctor who is just so concerned with all these plots about hybrids and children of the tardis and clones and What Makes A Time Lord.#but they’re so obsessed with it in just. a very Lore way. is what it feels like. we get brushes of more like with jenny and how she’s#physically a time lord and the doctor denies her that inheritance. a shared suffering…#but me myself im just fascinated with the doctor and the master as the time lords who survived. but they survived Wrong#its. its. children of gallifrey that don’t belong to her anymore. you know?#i dont care if river’s got time lord dna!!! or the metacrisis is physically human!!! i dont care!!! talk to me about what it means beyond#their blood and bones!!! what’s it like to have your sense of self stripped from you like that!!!#what’s it like when so much of you is the shed skin of time lords past. but one of you was human. one of you was painfully *humiliatingly*#human!!!#enough about how much dna you need to count as a time lord. i want to know how much they can mutate until they can’t be recognized as one.#does that make sense?
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god idk whats wrong with my brain it doesnt matter how tired i am as soon as i lay down to try and sleep i feel like im having a heart attack and being hunted for sport
#maybe i should try melatonin again#this moving disaster crisis 4 months ago is still not resolved and i start my second semester on the 6th and i just#i need this to be over with!!!!!!! i need to focus on studying but i cant do that when the environment is so hostile and fucked up#i know i could do better if i just didnt have to deal with bullshit 24/7#and of course on top of all of that T Antagonizer is still on their quest tor uin any hope ill have at a mildly happy life im just#im so over it man#25 years of nonstop disaster and only having myself to rely on and constantly being in survival mode im FUCKING OVER IT#i have no time to do anything im passionate abput when i work and am in school full time and theres ALWAYS A PROBLEM#all i have the energy to do when i rarely have free time is watch tv rotting into the couch#quarter life crisis hours are now#as if my entire life hasnt been a crisis#i dont feel passionate about anything these days and it just depresses me more#i just dont have time to be passionate#and yes this is capitalism fault. the abuse. the working myself to death to try and escape the abuse.#no supports to escape. your only option is giving up everything you own and going to a shelter and thats obviously crazy#and dangerous. ive been homeless and pulling yourself back out of it is nearly impossible.#being alive is really not groovy lads ill be honest. im terrified.
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I never wanted to make this post but it’s been on my mind for months now and I need to SPEAK MY TRUTH
If Junpei and Akane ever had sex (disgusting don’t make me think about that), don’t you dare tell me Akane would peg him. Because this simply isn’t true. It’s not that Akane isn’t enough of a #girlboss or that junpei can’t be pegged, no. It’s just that if these two fucking idiots ever actually ended up in this situation they would literally have the worst sex I’m talking the straightest most painful shit imaginable. Akane is laying there trying to figure out which fake moans sound most appropriate what kinda facade does she want to put on does she want to sound like SUPER into it or maybe it’d be more believable if she sounded only kinda into it. Whatever makes it end faster. Junpei starts off asking if she’s okay and his heart is pounding but not in a good way it’s a sense of dread and then like 2 seconds in he realizes that this shit is not worth it at all it’s wrong on every level good lord what’s even happening he’s not even trying he’s actually falling asleep. Akanes hair gets caught in something, Junpei is honest to god making bad small talk to make it less awkward, there’s a baby crying next door really loudly, Akane just texts Aoi to call dramatically saying he’s dying just so she has an excuse to leave. She could’ve communicated through the field but she was literally just that bored. Afterwards they do not speak about what the fuck just occurred, they just reevaluate their life choices and watch tv
#zero escape#dont come for me im literally correct and you know it#the idea of these two characters having sex is just like. disgusting absolutely disgusting#like im sorry i know i shit on this pairing a lot but theres literally no way theyre capable of having interesting sex#unless its like angry divorce hate sex but see i cant imagine them choosing sex as an outlet in that scenario#im more into the idea of them beating each other up and maybe killing each other#i like aroace akane a lot but if i had to put her with someone id say she could have interesting toxic yuri sex with mira#and junpei could honestly be with anyone else and have a better time its honestly absurd
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i am once again asking for a fic where sneeg and charlie absolutely just fucking hate ranboo to death like they want them dead 9478392 feet under with his crushed spiked fucked up head like they dont even bother trying to save them
#that mf killed them more than once!!!!! i think they should be angry!!!!!!!!!!#“but it was showfall and they know that 🥺🥺” I DONT CARE#I DONT CAAAAAARRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE#I DONT#THERES 29374928479292749292748 HAPPY RGB ESCAPE FICS I JUST WANT ONE 1 WHERE THEY HATE RANBOO
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KAITO GETTING ISEKAI'D
Yes i got this from tiktok
#dcmk#kaito kuroba#kaito kid#kaitou kid#ok so like#maybe smth happens when looking for Pandora#and he ends up accidently breaking a gem while trying to escape that is told to have “magic capabilities”#theres this fucking flash bang and the next thing he knows hes in a world where magic is like the main thing#i was gonna say “magic exists” but it already does#so like he ends up just doing a few tricks to show off and hopefully not be fucking homeless and starving#he ends up doing a few tricks and letting people drop some coins into his top hat#that ha snothing to do with plot i just think its funny#and yes#his doves were teleported with him#and since the very existence of “fake magic” isnt a thing in the otehr realm theyre just flabbergasted#people dont even try to figure it out and smth smth Kaito finds out he has to break the same gem he broke before#like to return#and its in the fucking royal treasury#so he either has to find a way to charm the nobles enough to get the attention of the royal family#or#break into somewhere in a realm where magic exists#I DIDNT WORD IT WELL BUT YK WHAT I MEAN
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Yooooo you worked at Michaels too?
(Ex-Framing department employee here)
YEA LETS GO EX-FRAMING DEPARTMENT they never even got around to teaching me production it was all wrapping and taking orders :/ Idk how it is at other shops but we only had 3 people working the whole frame shop. One person did ALL the frame assembly and us other two handled everything else. Was absolutely not worth $11/hr. man fuck retail. FUCK Design Hub too, if I may
#id come in for my like 4 hour shift and would have to run + close shop which included wrapping#wrapping storing calling for all orders done plus get all yhe frames lined plus unpack and clean up all the new frames coming in all by#all by the end of the night PLUS frame shop had to clean the bathrooms every night#plus actually running the front desk and taking orders and sometimes ppl would take hours picking matts that would cut into the time i had#to have everything else finished PLUS if i for some reason had everything done on time theyd make me run sales floor too#it was insane all the stuff they had me learn for such shit pay like. and#never work michales but never do it around the holidays more important#you will never escape the glitter#all that and my framing manager never got around to teaching me how to assemble a frame.#at least it was nice to hide in the frame shop so i wasnt talking to customers 24/7 but still#customers treat you so horribly like i was sweeping once and this lady comes up to me like saying the bathroom was disgusting right#and i get it. it was always disgusting. but we did clean it every night. anyway its hard when you cant just tell people that 1.#1 we clean them every night so if theres a huge mess in it most likely it was another shopper who pissed on the floor just cuz.#and 2 they only give us a mop and some pine sol to clean the whole 2 bathrooms every night. dont blame me blame michals lol#everything else was just so stupid#i wanna know how many framing department ppl everyone else had because we had 2 part time and 1 full time and i was only there a few months
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while im already on the train of teen wolf thoughts, i might as well say that i do not get sterek. romantically anyway. that ship is so intensely POPULAR and ive been seeing stuff about it for literal years, way before i ever even considered watching teen wolf or really knew what it was. pretty much every teen wolf fic i see on ao3 has some manner of sterek in it unless i SPECIFICALLY search for something else, like its just a given part of fanon, but now that im actually watching it im kinda like. where? like yeah they had that one vaguely homoerotic wall-pinning moment in season 1, they snark at each other a lot, but like. i don't even see them together that often. and that's not even MENTIONING the fact that in season 1 stiles is 15/16 and derek is fucking,, 22 (or 20, I'm not sure on his age but ik its at least a four-year difference),,, which is just. yeah no thanks
if anything they strike me more as, like, goofy, vaguely sibling-coded friends. stiles came along as a package deal with scott and started annoying the shit out of derek and derek had no say in the matter whatsoever, and i think that's beautiful.
all this being said, stiles is absolutely bisexual
#out of all the ships ive seen for teen wolf the one i can get behind the most is scott and isaac#like. that's some MAJOR devotion bro. isaac brings scott up like every other sentence (not literally but ykwim) its cute#the whole allison love triangle is mucking that up a bit and honestly just. what even is the point of that#but WITHOUT THAT. <3#and they dont even have a disturbing age gap!!!#(yeah it has not escaped my notice that teen wolf has some. issues. with minor/adult relationships and inappropriate age gaps)#(theres the whole thing with lydia and that deputy whose apparently like 24 or some shit that i havent even gotten to yet. not looking#-forward to that)#other random tw ship opinions:#scott and allison are actually cute! i was pleasantly surprised in season one when i actually LIKED the main het ship lmao#stiles and lydia (or what exists of them so far anyway) are also cute#i still think it would have been cute/nice/whatever if jackson had repressed feelings for danny (which i know is not an impossibility since#-he DOES apparently come back with a bf later on)#but like i dont know how much i actually see that or if i just like it in theory . really i appreciate their friendship as a friendship in#-its own right#on that note. danny and ethan: SWEET. get it danny. love the trope of 'i originally had an alterior motive for getting with you but i#-caught feelings and really care about you now oops'#speaking generally though the romance (whether canonical or otherwise) is definitely NOT what attracts me to and keeps me hooked on teen#-wolf. not by far#but i like having opinions about it anyway uwu#magpie thoughts
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youtube blocking adblocks is actually fucking crazy (yes i just got ublock origin its fine but that doesnt take away from me being angry)
#desire mona#the fact that i have less and less ways of escaping company greed is driving me fucking nuts#sometimes im just like. theres no way this is real#im hoping ublock stays reliable#well#i hope youtube doesnt beam ublocks asshole#sigh#what am i listening to rn i dont even know#i dont care - violent vira#thoughtsing
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I keep seeing like weird mentions here and there about how Joe is stronger than Hiromi and I??????
¿??????????????????
Joe is cut, but those abs aren't for strength, they're for show. (Yes, he absolutely is strong and athletic compared to others, but,)
This is what men who train for strength look like
They aren't skinny lads.
Hiromi is a BEEFCAKE. And I don't have any good pictures of him on my phone so u get this (which is also pretty accurate for people who strength train actually)
Joe probably trains specifically for agility, but that isn't to say larger men wouldn't be able to go toe to toe with him either. He'd have an advantage for aerial tricks I'd assume and honestly I'm mostly talking out of my ass here bc I know jack shit about skating, but I've formerly trained for professional wrestling so that's what I relate it to
Hiromi seems like he's new to lifting so that'd probably be his biggest disadvantage in a hypothetical strength test with the two of em BUT HES GOT A LOT OF HEART-- he would probably pull something by lifting too much bc he wanted to impress the manager lbr
#HI IM NEW AND LATE TO THIS FANDOM SO IDK IF ANYONES TALKED ABT THIS BEFORE#for all i know theres canon info about this BUT#Hiromi higa#kojiro nanjo#sk8 the infinity#sk8 joe#sk8 shadow#i just used this as an excuse to save pictures of beefy men to my phone#i too wish to eat 5 hamburgers whenever i walk into an A&W#i literally only watched sk8 for him i am not usually an anime person#BECAUSE I AM NOT INTO PRETTY BISHOUNEN#i saw a keychain of a punk clown man at the anime store and then i knew i would not be escaping from this#and hes HUNKY TOO?#THAT IS ALL OF MY INTERESTS#AND IM GONNA MAKE IT EVERYBODY ELSES PROBLEM.#i dont know how to participate in fandom so here u go an essay about how actually hiromis ass should be thicker
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That crips for e-sims thing always throws me off tbh, I know its disabled people coming together in solidarity for palestinians but I always think they mean the gang when I read it
#I actually didnt know it wasn't the gang until I read through their organization#I was just like theres no way theyre organizing for palestine on tumblr of all places...#I'm white and I'm also able bodied so I dont think its really my place to investigate why theyre using that specific term for their charity#and I personally feel that helping palestinians escape a genocide is more important that nuances like this#but idk#it throws me for a loop
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bad wolf soda <3
#level of obsession reached where i zoom in on screenshots to see what shes reading#p sure that says kierkegaard in white but thats as far as im getting#'first existentialist philosopher'#okay i really gotta find out what the fuck existentialism really means now bc carmilla seems to like it#'related to the meaning purpose and value of human existence.#Common concepts in existentialist thought include existential crisis dread#and anxiety in the face of an absurd world and free will as well as authenticity courage and virtue.'#SCREAM OKAY I SEE I SEE#kierkegaard beauvoir sartre nietzsche camus yep p sure those all get mentioned#okay this is fun#kierkegaard was like an existentialist before the word and hes from the first half of the 19th century#dont know if you can call vampires contemporaries of people bc....immortal. but carmilla was a contemporary of him#technically#and then when existentialism gets named halfway the 20th century carmilla has just escaped her blood coffin punishment#and so shes alone for a little bit without direction. perhaps free or perhaps waiting for mother to show up again#it's fun that existentialism seems sort of to be abt there being a choice abt who you want to be#that youre not defined by an essence. that What You Are is not defined pre what you do#so you can shape yourself#it's interesting the tension between that belief and the position carmilla is in. no wonder theres self-loathing#but also! she starts resisting the What She Is that is imposed on her. after 1945. starts sabotaging plans#i gotta go download some books#'ive got a talk i wanna catch on goethe' hang on im googling#1749-1832 she lived through that too#oh right faust and young werther i know of those#'Goethe admitted that he 'shot his hero to save himself' a reference to Goethe's near-suicidal obsession for a young woman a passion he que#relatable#god theres so much to read in the world and i have not read any of it#carmillaposting#i wonder what she'd write her dissertation about
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ok i think ive seen every nathaniel post on tumblr by now
#delete later#this isnt a huge feat theres like nothing in the tag#i dont wanna see much more though... no hate but i cannot agree with any of the x reader smuts with him in it#i really wanted to know what other ppl thought abt him the tag is that empty#i shouldnt have looked though bc i just got mad#i felt like i needed to make a full point for point line by line refutation#HE WOULD NOT SAY THAT#shoutout to the one post i saw of nebu escaping imprisonment though that was interesting
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my take is that sonic generations is a good game i like it and its fun to play but it doesnt deserve to be hyped up as one of the best sonic games . sorry.
#i swear its only considered one of the best because classic sonic is in it because the game is just so Nothing#like the gameplay is good but its not enough to make the game stand out and theres not really anything else there that does#the levels arent bad but theyre also not memorable because theyre all taken from existing games#which i KNOW is the whole gimmick of the game. but still.#like when i think of city escape i think of sa2 not generations. when i think of rooftop run i think of unleashed not generations.#and the story feels nonexistent too . maybe not everyone cares about the stories of sonic games but i do#how many people even think about sonic generations ever actually .#i always see people go ''yeah generations is the best 3d game'' but never see people talk about the game other than that#like man maybe some of the more poorly received games are flawed but at least theyre actually memorable#(i say some of and not all because with most of them i can see why they wouldnt be for everybody even if i dont think theyre bad#but i cant see it with unleashed . unleashed is my beautiful perfect son who i am protecting from all criticism)#like generations is a fun play . especially if youre feeling nostalgic . but idk i dont think its one of the best not even close
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