#i just didn't use the name on my main tumblr account for some reason

[ask-prune-juice]

Borf borf

"Is that your pet? They seem friendly, do they have a name?"

[sexhaver]

can you tell us all the plugins / ad blockers you use

on desktop, uBlock Origin (NOT Adblock Plus! they sold out years ago! they literally take money from advertisers to make sure their ads get through their filters!) and SponsorBlock for Firefox. if you still see ads on youtube specifically check out this page. if it's green, then the problem is with your specific installation and you should check out this reddit megathread. if it's red, then tough luck, wait a few hours for uBlock's crack team of hackers to catch back up in their constant arms race with Youtube.

for Android, get ReVanced Manager from here and use that + an .apk download of the latest Youtube release (just google "youtube apk") to patch yourself together a version of the Youtube app that acts like you paid for Advanced even though you didn't, which means no ads. also, side tangent, that's where the name comes from: originally it was just "Youtube Vanced" because it was "Advanced" without the "ad"s. then the Vanced team got slapped with a C&D for being dumbasses and minting NFTs of the Vanced logo, which was literally just the Youtube logo, so ReVanced rose from the ashes to continue its legacy. oh also there are a shitload of boxes you can check off during the patching process and one of them just integrates Sponsorblock for you, so that's nice.

i should also mention here, for no reason in particular, that the Vanced Manager app lets you patch a number of other apps in the same way, removing ads and adding "premium" features without you having to pay. one of these apps may or may not be Tumblr itself.

as long as you're fucking with your Android, download xManager and use it to get ad-free Spotify without paying for it. iirc the app auto-downloads the apk for you but it's been months since i last fucked with it so i might be misremembering.

honorary mention goes to NewPipe for being a way easier to install alternative to all of the above if you don't care about logging in. it's an alternate frontend for youtube that lets you watch it ad-free right out of the box. the main drawbacks are that the UI is a little ugly (especially compared to the official/ReVanced version), you can't use Sponsorblock, and it doesn't sync with your Google account (this could be a plus for you if you're big into privacy but personally i like having my likes and watch history synced across desktop and mobile). although now that i just did some research to make sure i wasn't talking out my ass, it looks like the original dev is working on a forked version of the app named Tubular that does have Sponsorblock and is apparently trying to get google account stuff working, so that's cool. oh and it can also browse/play Soundcloud ad-free, if you still use Soundcloud in 2024

[toxicanonymity]

For context, a tumblr account has been posting anon hate for the past week or so, mostly toward writers. A parasocial hater of mine discovered the account and has been going to town. I posted this after they invoked Israel as an analogy. Yes really.

Obviously I am disgusted by what I just read, and floored that anyone would post such a deranged analogy in the interest of stirring up fandom drama. I'm very sorry to everyone who has been attacked and everyone who has witnessed all this. Others have posted about the situation as a whole, and I'm not sure what I could add. But I want you to know many of these "confessions" are from one individual who has been fixated on me (and probably others) for weeks if not months. I already had the following in my drafts:

warning: please don't read this if you're sensitive to hate or could be triggered by the trivialization of real abuse. (edit: they went on to trivialize genocide too but they'll pretend to be different people). there's also a really gross anatomical reference.

the screenshots are all after I blocked them.

I normally don't address things like this, but that's because I'm trying to keep it off your dash and off my blog (for several reasons including not wanting to give the hate a larger audience for their message). Normally I block/delete. But thanks to a blog dedicated to posting anon hate, some of this is already on the dash, and I thought some additional context could be illuminating.

a couple weeks ago, this person chimed in on my non-fandom post, and their comment made me uncomfortable. I checked to see if they followed me and they didn't, plus their blog tagline was antagonistic. I was confident they weren't being earnest. I replied, pointing out my issue with their comment and asking them to keep their thoughts to themselves rather than coming at me from a sideblog. I thought they must have followed me from a main account since they somehow found an untagged, unreblogged post without following me. But I now realize they were simply hate checking my blog.

(Blocked the burner too)

They were saying this last bit preemptively - I've never talked about stalkers here. I didn't include all their anons, just enough to show they clearly out themselves as being the same person. In other "confessions," they make repeated references to a former fandom writer they idolize (not me) who they also posted about on their blog.

I won't be dropping this creep's url in this post, but I had never heard of them. This week they have repeatedly changed their url, display name, and blog appearance. Their writing is recognizable and I believe they are responsible for the unhinged asks preceding katy's departure from tumblr. They also made a rude comment on her post.

This may only aggravate them. I expect them to hurl any lies and accusations they can think of toward me. They will act like they're laughing and amused, too. You may recognize their tone. I want to trust this fandom not to believe and repeat anything they hear, but unfortunately my experience in this fandom leaves me pessimistic.

I can only hope people use common sense at this point.

Note - I know I'm normally really private about everything, but you're welcome to share this. Their lies are already out there anyway. Also feel free to DM me and I will tell you what you want to know.

Update: the anon-hate account referred to above has deactivated. It was named pedgeconfessions. It wasn't the first to pop up this summer and may not be the last.

[teoft]

It's like Tumblr has become almost a diary for me, thanks to no character limit and a read more button. This atmosphere of acceptance and understanding helps a lot too.

I'll get back to posting actual art, juggling with Twitter and Bluesky along with commissions is taking up a lot of my time.

Anyway, thoughts about art community and being social

For the longest time I've had this feeling of being an outsider in this vague community of artists that see as colleagues of sorts. Like I meet all the "criteria" of being in the group, and yet don't really feel like I'm part of it. Well, it seems I am right in some way, and the reason is that they interact with each other, while I sit here drawing alone.

Unfortunately I've always been prone to isolate myself from others. I grew up feeling like I should be ashamed of loving to draw, since it was always fanart monsters, creatures and cool guys instead of "proper art" like animals and portraits. Before social media, I only drew for myself and never showed anything to anybody. I hid my art from my family, from the world, so that I wouldn't be judged. I think it is one of the biggest reasons why I have trouble interacting with people in the context of art (tbh I'm shit at being social anyway but that's a whole another problem).

Even when I had a scanner and means to post my art online, I never did, due to the whole "if you put something online it'll be there forever" mindset. My first actual account anywhere online must've been Facebook in 2010ish, where I only had a few friends. It was the perfect place for me to finally post anything online, and so I did: I used to post pretty much everything I drew on there. Slowly gaining courage, I eventually made my original Tumblr account, then Deviantart, Twitter, etc.

Still, all I did was throw my art out there in hopes of somebody liking it. I didn't really know how to interact with the people who commented on my posts, so instead I mostly just... made more art. I did have some friend groups here and there, but either they ended up falling apart or my social battery drained in such a way that I slowly drifted away. I had gotten used to just being by myself and relying only on myself in the online art world.

During my design studies, I started putting more thought and work on promoting myself, so that it could be one career path for me to take. My mindset was that I'll work hard and become "big", even if it meant that one post gained me just one follower. In 2020 I ended up going viral with a meme and suddenly getting tens of thousands of followers. It was great and a welcome boost of morale, but unfortunately 2020 was otherwise one of the worst years in my life.

Throughout the years people have come and gone, so the only constant for me has been myself, and my drive to develop my skills. Thus it's been too easy for me to just isolate myself. In a way it has been my strength with regards to art, but sometimes I wish I knew how to make lasting connections. I think/know I might be autistic to some degree, which adds to the difficulty of being social. Though, to be honest, I don't know if I'd gotten this far without my autistic hyperfixations.

I guess the thing I need to do now to fix this problem of loneliness and isolation is to just... slowly try and be more social. To reply to comments and talk to people. All of which is easier said than done. Still, just gotta take that first step and then keep going.

Despite lacking the kind of community I yearn for, it seems I've made a name for myself, enough so that people seem to take pride in knowing me. Or at least that's the impression I've gotten a few times. But still, I am happy that I've had a positive effect on people. After all, my two main motivators in art are that I like doing it, and I like when people enjoy my art.

[sun-gut]

Hey there; I wanted to mention with a quick search of my old username that I did see the discussion on the current Vore community status and want to say I wholly agree, and share some additional insight as to why. I was Bioluminescent-Bat, and Glowinside/Shadow0Haven was one of my main groomers (I believe I was freshly 18-19 when I was moderating servers; this does NOT excuse failures to moderate and educate properly, just explain as a word of caution). At 14, I was within a Skype server with them & others who actively insisted their interest was Nonsexual, wherein they discussed heavily fetish-based activities while knowing I was a high school student actively. They trained me into sticking in close circles, and writing works I was unaware were fetishistically appealing (including ones with younger characters. Still horrified by this). Earlier years included them maintaining a very heavy interest in me in the “one of us” mentality within those spheres, and encouraged me to get peers interested in the concept as well. I did not know this was recruitment tactic of fellow minors at the time. The “SFW” side in early adulthood also constantly told me that if I stepped away from them I would be actively fetishized, and insisted “mixed” spaces of children and adults were the only “safe” ones. They also insisted that if I was not “Ace enough” or so much as engaged with fellow adults/18+ spaces, I was lying about having thematic vs sexual interest and essentially had “permission” to sexualize me. This is beyond concerning to me now looking back in adulthood on a multitude of reasons.

After user concern reasonably sparked, I was able to purge the associated accounts and abandoned all associated spaces. But due to the fact that included the tumblr I did want to anonymously send this your way to confirm that as a word of warning for others. The “SFW Vore” spaces are designed by groomers to raise new generations of well-intending but horrifically misguided children into adults who have been abused into not understanding what a safe community looks like. Having stepped away, I watched that pattern continue with others of similar mentality who I was unable to explain this to or warn, as others had me. This is no longer a topic I can engage within a community with, but one I do feel I need to give proper warning to others on in my stead.

In essence, Vore can indeed be Nonsexual but is never for children. The insistence on SFW being synonymous with Nonsexual and/or “child-friendly” is extremely dangerous, and I know I and many others have paid dearly for it. I hope that change will come before another generation goes through a similar cycle, and in an ironic twist am grateful that people continue speaking out against the very thing I was soldiered to defend.

I thank you either way for recieving this, whether it’s responded to or not. <3

oh my god I'm so sorry this all happened to you holy fuck. this is horrific. I genuinely hope you're doing better and that you aren't around those people anymore- what they did is horrifying and disgusting. glowinside/shadow0haven also made me extremely uncomfortable- especially when I was also a child under a different name on tumblr, but I didn't know they were also actively grooming people. jesus fuck.

[tech-deck]

Tech-Deck 2.0!!...sorta

This is a long one folks, so I'll add a TLDR at the bottom. But for those who wish to read on, grab some popcorn :3

Hello friends! It's been a while. like, a year or so I guess? There may be some who remember me, and there may be some who are like "never heard of ya!" and that's quite alright!

My name is Tech-Deck, or Techie, or Amber (by person to person mostly, but anyone is welcome to call me by that name too) I used to be someone who posted an re-blogged a lot back during the heydays of a show called "The Bad Batch"

A year ago I made the ulimate decision of destroying my tumblr account of, geez 11 years? I had it since 2012, but really didn't do much on it for a long time. That was until I got hooked into the Star Wars fandom. And suddenly it was like an entirely new wave of socializing had swept me under my own two feet!

I fell in love with a show called "The Mandalorian" during lockdown and had such a blast that I wanted more SW content, but didn't really know what else to watch that I found interesting.

And then my brother told me about this Clone Wars spinoff called "The Bad Batch" and I watched the first hour long premiere and I was instantly hooked.

But at the time I had not seen much of The Clone Wars TV show outside of a few stray episodes on cable TV. so I knew I had to dig my heels and go back to watch the entire 7 season run of the show and...My God what a show it was! (This is why I'm an avid cartoon = for everyone ambassador because holy hell!) So much drama, and action and political espionage and sabotage and all the "tages" lol.

From there I got back to the new show that seemed to be an interesting spin-off of TCW and it was something in that show that really sparked my shift into more social and creative avenues.

I joined Discord for the first time, I started to connect to a lot of other fans of the show, and then....I got the inspiration to write!

and my God, did I have a lot to write about, or moreso I had a lot to write about a certain character. But the bottom line in the moment was I had jumped into a new creative avenue that I never thought I would ever do. And, not to toot my own horn, but I felt like I did pretty well with my works. At least the ones important to me were.

I enjoyed the love and even the constructive criticism I got, I went through the same fun of watching each episode and wanting to write my own characters, or ideas into each one, but alas my time management and slow writing speeds didn't quite match up all the time.

And lets just say, that in all my years of living, I have met friends for a season, a reason, and a lifetime thanks to this fandom. I get to work with an amazingly talented, awesome, and wonderful individual who has been nothing but supportive of my endeavors and I am so very thankful to have them in my life! so yes, thank you @tech-aficionado!!

And of course, there are too many to list here, but I have made some incredible friends that have pushed me, and inspired me to not only write, but to be more open about my experiences and challenges, and dare I say, my strangeness in such a strange world.

...With all that said...why did I leave tumblr then if I was doing great?

To be honest...on the inside I let my own self doubts and criticisms get the best of me.

Many days i would struggle to even open up my discord or chat with people, or even be honest in how i was feeling. I could tell that a lot of external pressure I thought I felt was really my own self-hate and guilt seeping through the smiles and bright eyes. I wanted to be open, but something was holding me back from explaining my sorrows, and ultimately I also could tell my main struggle was hoping for absolute recognition.

I realize it's a silly thing now, but back then I would be disheartened at the lack of response or comments and such to my works or to my replies. I felt like there was still this invisible wall that I couldn't get past to be part of this greater collective of individuals. I let my idea of perfectionism and need for approval get the best of me, and I finally had a moment of clarity driving out to a hike one day.

There were many times I wanted to delete everything social media wise and just forego the entirety of it. To finally be like me in my youth where all I really needed was the open air and a good book and some irl friends to hang with.

So I finally deleted my tumblr account and oddly enough, it did feel like a giant weight came off of my shoulders. Like I no longer had to feel like I needed to prove myself by writing all the time, or trying to engage in fandom chats with everyone at all times. I finally felt free to let my real personality and introverted needs to take over.

I was still pretty active on Discord with friends, but even then soon I started to dwindle in my comments and posts. Gone were the days where I would have the app open on my laptop or phone, ready to jump into a conversation about the latest episode or the latest spicy fic one of us wrote!

Now I barely keep check, I'm on a few times during the week, but it's mostly DM's to my boss, who is currently sitting next o me as I type like my keyboard is on fire, about how annoying our co-workers can be, or planned trips to places together. But I can tell that this is exactly where I am the happiest.

I love all my friends that I have made on here and on Discord or other media, and I want you all to know that I will never not love you all so much, but I also know that my own sanity rests with more quiet time than probably most people.

I'm a loner at heart, always have been and I probably will most likely be for the rest of my life. Do I have my days where I need social contact, yes. But even then there are moments where my battery just dips so drastically that I need a breather for a week or 2 before I come back online, or chat again.

So now the real question...why am I back on Tumblr, where it all began?

Well, I guess I never really left this place. I had this new account for a while, mostly to make sure my friends were doing okay that I didn't chat to much, but also, there's just something I enjoy about seeing everyone's passions and love to share their creativity and liveliness on one of the last genuine social sites left. I can't bear the idea of not having something great to read or share with others and this is that one place that sparks creativity in others...it definitely did for me :3

So now you all know, at least whoever read all the way through! (I commend you, it was definitely a lot to process myself) and I want you all to know that I'm not fully back and running a blog like I used to. I don't write much at all anymore, and I probably won't pick it up much again unless I really feel the urge, but even those urges are just small WIP's that hang out in my docs for years collecting dust and growing new mold spores!

I'm just here, vibing to my own tunes and at my own pace, and I have made peace with that. And I want to encourage you all to also take a breather from time to time, you don't have to delete anything if you're not as insane to jump the gun like I did.

But take some time to consider your own health and well-being. Find that lost spirit if you feel like you're in the dark, and if this is where you feel your best and your most "you" than keep at it!

I will be here, vibing and lurking, just being me. And that's all that I need to be! PEACE!

TLDR: Tech-Deck is back, but at my own pace and my own vibe!

[freddie-77-ao3]

sup yall we're vibing here

anyway. hey, my name's freddie, and i'm finally trying to write an actual intro/master post which... we'll see how this goes.

important stuff is highlighted in orange.

so, basic stuff:

as I said, my name's freddie. he/him pronouns. i'm a college student (majoring in accounting, might add a psych minor). not gonna say which college but i'm currently in california.

i've been on tumblr since 2019 i think? not under this account, this started as a fandom account and then spiralled out of control... really fast. um, my regular tumblr which i've not actually opened in ages is @chronicchthonic14 so. yeah.

not particularly relevant to this blog, but i might mention it at some point so, i have autism and adhd. and some other things but. like. that list is very long and those are the two most relevant because i promise if i come off wrong/mean, i didn't mean to, i just forget to make my words normal. but. those are the two most referenced. if for whatever reason someone wants to know more or has questions you can send an ask ig?

i'm scottish, born there. moved to US when I was four. finishing uni and moving back.

some quick warnings

this blog definitely contains cursing/vulgar language, whatever you want to call it, so if you're not comfortable with that, probably not the blog for you, as i don't tag cursing or anything for you to filter out.

if, for whatever reason, if i ever reblog something that contains a slur (against racial minorities, queer people, anything) i will ABSOLUTELY tag that though.

also if anyone has any trigger warnings they think any content needs, please let me know-- asks, dms, comments, reblogs

the cursing thing also applies for sort of dirty jokes? think that only applies to like. two posts and very not explicit. those aren't currently tagged but if they get any more explicit they certainly will be.

queer identity because the explicit reminded me, i'm asexual, and probably straight. maybe bi? dunno, don't particularly care. and i'm trans. ftm. this isn't the blog i talk about that on usually though, unless it relates to a specific ask or a fandom thing.

which, getting into what this blog is for because i can't think of anything else i need to add here (guys let me know if i forgot important stuff, please, i'm an idiot!!! i will forget the important stuff and write random shit instead!! i've already deleted three tangents from this!!)

sooooo

fandoms!! ones i write and/or post about or will potentially post about

percy jackson extending to hoo, toa, tkc (definitely post way less about this), mcga (again, way less). haven't read TSATS or COTG yet, but spoilers are fine. i post way more about minor characters. write fanfiction for and have some posted (both on here and ao3) and a bunch of snippets.

dcu-- films, comics, animated shows, all of it. personally, my favorites are young justice (the comics, not show version), new teen titans, and batman inc (batgirls, nightwing, and red robin esp). late 90s yj run is my favorite, and i loved the DCeased event. favorite batman comic is definitely court of owls run. no fanfics posted, but some on docs.

mcu-- way less so, but have a stucky oneshot. slowly making my way through in timeline order.

throne of glass. i'm an aedion and chaol apologizer because they do a bunch of dumb shit but then WHO DOESN'T in this series. fanfics in doc, not posted.

this would go on for ages if i listed everything so instead, here's an ask i answered on my fandoms/genres and everything. feel free to send me asks about anyone. if you send me something about radium girls i may cry though (tears of joy) so there's your advanced warning.

main things you'll see on my blog are incorrect quotes, snippets, and the occasional fic

this^^

my... idk, contact policy? seriously what do i word this

asks are always open, anon is on.

if you send hate... whatever. i'll probably delete it.

unless i find it funny. then I'll post it. there's really little you could say to me that would hurt.

when i say asks are always open, you can drop anything you want.

literally anything

you need to vent? want advice? want to request headcanons? request a fic? give me a prompt? ask random things about me? something else I've forgotten? go right ahead

if you want to ask me to update my fics? go right ahead. sometimes i forget i didn't post something.

send as many asks as you want, i don't care if it might be spam

i can't promise i'll respond to asks in a timely manner, sometimes i open my inbox and forget they exist for months, i'm sorry. if it's something you really want answered you can send another one

dm's are alright? if you want to be friends or something, go right ahead.

anyone can reblog any of my posts/comment/heart, i don't care. you want to heart 50 things in a row? i adore you. if i had kids, you would get my firstborn

if we're mutuals you can ask for my insta/give me yours.

now, other accounts:

anyway, i think that's it?

[multific]

!!! Let Me Be Clear !!!

Okay, EVERYONE.

@yautjabeast aka @poppytanji123 on Wattpad, this one is for you and ALL the others who think it's okay to steal.

I'm here to make one thing clear.

DO NOT STEAL, REPOST OR TRANSLATE ANY OF MY WORKS  

This little message has been on the bottom of all of my works, on top of my Masterlist and even in my Bio for a reason.

Yet, it looks like some people just don't get it.

I write because I enjoy writing, not for people to copy and paste, repost and gain views/likes whatever.

Each story posted here is MINE unless credit states otherwise.

NO ONE has permission to repost, translate or STEAL anything.

They are my babies, and you don't have permission to take them!

I would hate to go down like many other Tumblr writers due to plagiarism.

EVEN if you put my name as credit I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION.

I have done it in the past, those can obviously stay, but for a long time now, I do not want my stories to be posted by other people.

I have a Wattpad, AO3 and Tumblr for a reason.

These are my main accounts and only these should have my works on them. PERIOD.

I would get it if people got inspired, wrote a continuation or reached out to me regarding an idea. But just copying and pasting something off of Tumblr and posting it elsewhere IS NOT OKAY.

Recently, someone wrote to me on Wattpad saying someone has been reposting mine and other people's fanfiction.

And yes, 4 of them were stolen from me and I found many of other people's works as well. 2 out of the 4 didn't even mention my account name anywhere, which makes it look like the person posting is the writer.

PLAGIARISM

Now, one can say it is only fanfiction what's the big deal?! The big deal is that I spend hours or days on something that someone just steals!

IT IS NOT OKAY.

Please if you see this, report report report. Post a comment, and let the people know about the thief!

Thank you.

----

A/N: Reblogging never bothered me. It's the blatant stealing that got me to this point. Liking, reblogging and commenting is what Tumblr allows, which is what I also appreciate since it gets my work out there.

Taglist: @fleursirvart @greenarrowhead@thisismysecrethappyplace @sincerelyfan @theoneanna @aestheticsandmarvel @rororo06 @castellandiangelo @destynelseclipsa @spilledinkindumpster @capsiclesdoll @puknow @alwayshave-faith @alex12948 @lxdyred  @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @anonymoussherlockandmarvelgeek @praline357 @trshngyn @avengers-r-us @violet-19999 @top1bbgloak  @manduse  @jacalineiscomingforyou  @mandoloriancookie @noname2246

~Masterlist~

AO3

[zmbiesvape]

people are lying about me, harassing me, stalking me (how are you getting a bunch of screenshots of my acc when I have you star, chirssy, and evb else that I know is close with you blocked.) and sending their friends to harass me & and innocent ppl. I made this blog because people were sending me anons threatening to rape my friends, not because I "didn't want to take accountability" I still stand by everything I said, moreso now actually. I just don't want to talk about a situation that happened TWO months ago just because an insane narcissist wants to drag it out. I haven't posted about it in MONTHS, but you keep posting abt it and unblocking me to dm me. also I don't remember ever even finding your TT acc, idk ur username on there, not that I care enough that I'd stalk you either way. I'm not sure what that was abt, I'm pretty sure one of my mutual reposted one of ur videos or smth. sorry abt that. I also never called you a rapist. I said you roleplayed rape, because you did. the thing I said about me being an sa advocate wasn't even about that situation. you just refused to acknowledge it and got mad that I didn't name drop. obviously you didn't fucking rape me holy shit. Im also an sa survivor myself, so u can stop saying "real sa victims" because I am. and not bc of you. not everything is about you jazz. also nobody that I talk to is sending you anons, so u can stop saying that thanks.

literally all I wanted was to be left alone, and the main reason I even got upset in the first place was because you wouldn't leave me alone. (I said that to you multiple times, not that I exaggerated the situation. cuz I didn't.) I've realized you're not gonna stop harrassing me, you're not gonna stop lying about me, and you're gonna continue to stalk me because youre so self centered you have to see what I'm saying about you even though I've said nothing for months.

calling me pathetic and saying I'm dragging it on when you've unblocked me MULTIPLE times to say some random bullshit and you continue to post about me is insane. you've also talked to my friends and lied about me, I've only talked to one person who wasn't involved in the situation, because they asked. everybody else that blocked you made that decision on their own based on what they saw. the ONLY times I've posted about this on this blog was when I told the anons to stop, unblocking star to tell them to stop posting about me (that's not a post but I felt like I should include it), and today.

I'm making a new blog again. stop unblocking me to spew your unmedicated bullshit, don't look for my new blog cuz you're already blocked, stop sending people to my page to harrass me (ik u r bc u admitted it. also one of the anons (they admitted to being an anon) was harrassing my Instagram and gave you the joke post I made that you've been using as "proof". unless you did somehow find my Instagram.) just stop talking about the situation. the only ppl that care atp are you and ur 2 friends. I wasn't the one who brought it here like you keep saying, you got mad over a private conversation (that happened after I'd already blocked you bc you don't know how to leave people alone) and took it to Tumblr! I made ONE vague post that I deleted like 2 mins later and you ran with it.

I could say so much more shit you'd done, but people are scared about coming out about what you did so I won't. I'm sorry you have to live with yourself knowing you're lying about me and so many other people while there's still so many ppl suffering in silence bc of what u did.

I'm also extremely sorry to anyone and everyone who got caught in the crossfire, nobody who was sent those gross insane anons or dmed deserved it. I'm also sorry to my ex mutuals who genuinely think I'm a horrible person bc jazz is so obsessed with this situation that she won't stop lying! love you all so much ^3^ dm me if u want my new handle!

[7grandmel]

Blog Update - 16/06/2024

TL;DR: My 1-month break is over! The blog is returning but with a slower rate of posts. New forms of posts will start rolling out soon as well - scroll down to the bullet-point list for details.

Hello all! I've been receiving some asks and questions in the request form wondering where I've been this past month. Rest assured, I've been fine. With Athletic Doctor back in May, I reached the one-year anniversary of doing this daily-rip-posting thing, and today, June 16th, marks the one-year anniversary of this blog's existence as a whole with Snowball Park - Super Mario 3D World. Because yeah, for those first 30 posts I didn't do this as part of a blog, but as a daily activity for my own personal Tumblr account on @melblur. If you compare the word counts on those first few posts (the "First 30 Archive") to the posts made later in the blog's run, you'll likely be able to see how my focus in writing evolved, going from mere shoutouts and recommendations to full-on retrospectives and analysis. That was a large part of why I chose the blog's initial name as "Tumblr's SiIvaGunner Historian", there's something about regaling these oft-forgotten events in the channel's history that just invigorates me, a passion that kept me doing this for a year straight. What began as nothing but a laid-back writing exercise to keep my mind sharp became something that, on some days for rips that I was truly passionate about, drew my FULL undivided attention for an entire day's worth.

You saw the TL;DR, and you can probably tell where this is going. By the last few posts, I was noticing myself that this really isn't sustainable to keep doing at a daily rate. I've worn that pace as a badge of honor for so long on here: In my mind, it just made so much sense for a blog celebrating SiIvaGunner, a channel partially defined by its insane rate of uploads, to also do things at such a high pace, with so many references to past posts interconnecting them all just like the many in-jokes on SiIvaGunner itself. But this blog isn't a network of a hundred team members and a thousand contributors - aside from the requests on what to write and footnotes left by a rip's creator, everything made on this blog has done solely by its writer, me, Mel. I loved it - but I do think its about time I slow things down.

I was as torn on this choice as you likely are seeing it - after all, it's called "TODAYS siivagunner" for a reason, right? I was toying around with how to resolve this as far back as in March of this year, tossing around ideas and concepts as to rework the blog to be more feasible whilst still preserving its spirit. The April Fools prank, the legendary Raftmageddon of Raft Ride ~ The Story So Far, was sort of an offshoot of this, a day where posts were more rapid-fire than ever yet were all contained to just five or six sentences each: Short, snappy, concise, and even pretty casual and silly a lot of the time. And that was really fun for the sake of the bit, it again fit with the nature of Raft Ride the same way that my main posts sort of fit with the nature of standard SiIvaGunner uploads, but I realized even then that it wouldn't be a good fit for the blog's main posts - the things that make both you and I most happy as readers and writers respectively are when I get to truly get down to the meat of a rip and explore its contents and history to the fullest.

A month went by quicker than I thought it would, but alas, here we are. A lot can change in not so much time - I'm currently employed, for one, which is yet another reason why daily posts feel far less feasible, but I'm also spending my time expanding my interests, listening to albums, reading books, watching shows, talking to new people...I want this blog to keep going, but I also don't want to use it as an excuse for my own lack of growth as a person. And so, I've landed on a compromise that I hope will satiate all of us. Here's the current plan for the blog going forward:

Rip coverage will be going from daily to weekly, posted every Monday starting tomorrow, June 17th. In return, the goal is to make these posts as well-written and interesting to read as possible.

Requests for these posts will still be taken as normal. I'll of course try to prioritize requests from people who haven't had theirs featured on the blog yet, but keep in mind that it's still up to my judgement if I'll be able to have enough to say on a rip (or know enough about a rip's topic) to warrant writing a post on it!

New, more laid-back kinds of posts for the blog will be featured in the days between rip coverage posts - these will be a lot simpler in nature and made ~2-4 times a week depending on my schedule. Here are some examples of posts I have in mind!

GIFs and image sets from the channel's various visual rips and/or lore videos! Think the Christmas Comeback Crisis, the KFAD Tournaments, the Festival events of Season 4, 5 and 6, legacy content posted on the SiIvaGunner Twitter account, and more!

Character appreciation posts featuring all sorts of characters from the SiIvaGunner lore! Celebrate the figments you love with all twelve other SiIvaGunner fans on Tumblr!

Trivia about the channel, which I'd otherwise sneak into main posts, may get small little posts in of themselves! This can be anything from Did-You-Knows about how in-jokes have been carried on during the channel's life, to easter eggs and references, to fun tidbits about rippers themselves.

Shitposts! Goofs! Stuff I'd otherwise reblog under the #epic flintstones tag, basically.

Miscellaneous text posts related to the channel, such as Guides, summaries, or just whatever various thoughts I have!

All of these will have their own tags dedicated to them, just like #todays siivagunner - what tags they end up being is still up in the air and may change even as the posts are rolling out. Either way, the blog's pinned post will be continually updated with all the relevant tags and info about the blog - keep an eye out on it during next week.

Whew! That's a lot of stuff covered. I hope you're as excited for the second year of this blog as I am! Hopefully the greater variety of posts will help with the longer wait between "main" posts. The goal is, as you can imagine, to keep the blog a fun read for you all and just as much of a fun passtime for me, whilst also easing my own workload enough to make it manageable. I love running this blog more than anything, and I'm hoping this new schedule will give me more energy to make better posts - Maybe I'll even get a chance to interact with all of you even more by discussing more than just per-rip analysis.

Thanks for reading everyone - That SiIvaGunner Tumblr Blog will officially be back tomorrow!

[sonicjustbecause]

Is a bit in my mind these days...

Last month there was on YT a video. It was an answer toward a well known tumblr Sonic fan, who now has deactivated her account.

The topic was mostly about if Sonic was a introvert or ambivert character. I won't share the video as is mostly a direct answer toward her, but it cleared the common misconception about the meaning of words such asd introvert/ambivert/extravert (I didn't use those adjective much because I was not so confident about their meaning.)

I may share some photogram. I also left the name of the autor just in case you want to give a look...

The traits are determined simply on what activity makes you happy. it has nothing to do with how outgoiung or reserved you are.

(to tell something about myself, I'm a pure ambivert but my overall personality is not... uh... enjoyable? By most. Even though I'm a peaceful person. My main flaw is too much infodumping on topics of my interests, mostly art and science. People don't like that.

I lost touch from my extraverted side and I quite miss that. Overall I'm cautious on how I present myself nowadays, just to avoid to make people run away).

This. One of my best friend from art school was exactly like that, shy and socially awkward. She was even soft spoken when I knew her first and she had a beautiful voice (later she switched to loud talker because she gained confidence around me and her newly made friends). And she was also definitely an extrovert. She often complained how she felt exausted due to four hours lasting lack of social interaction and she needed to gather her 10 friends to recharge her battery.

Now, I won't analyze a character from Sonic, but i will analyze an overlooked extroverted character from Dragon Ball.

DB has a unusually high cast of introverts. This traits virtually fit all Z warriors, for some reasons.

But there are few extroverted, like the Ginew force, Mr. Satan and...

Yep! Future Trunks.

Future Trunks is a bit underdeveloped in Z but is shown that he is perfectly fine in social situation. But in Dragon ball Super his personatlity as whole is more explored. In both manga and anime he admits being around people relax him. And he appears refreshed after having been into a social situation, especially with lots of people around, while he obviously does not enjoy solitude at all.

As for Sonic? I perceived him as ambivert in all media but Sonic X. There he is a introvert, yes. But only there. The fact that he is mysterious may be misleading though.

[intrepidacious]

hi! ok I just wanted to ask someone who knows how tumblr works haha

so I found someone who writes amazing content so I decided to follow them. I binged lots of their fics earlier today and when I checked their profile again later, their profile doesn’t show. It seems they might have blocked me and I don’t know why :( I commented that I loved their fics and the comments are removed. my profile has my age and I am decently active on reposting & commenting on fics. This happened to me one other time too so I just am confused I guess :( I tried to message them but it said it wouldn’t go through so that makes me think I’m blocked? I guess I don’t know why a couple people blocked me? Just kinda made me sad bc I really enjoy their work but now I won’t be able to see anymore ☹️😢

happy to!! 💛

first thing you gotta remember that in all likelihood, your getting blocked is nothing personal. reasons for blocking someone on tumblr include but aren't limited to:

you don't have your age (range) listed in your bio/clearly visible on your blog

the age you have listed doesn't adhere to boundaries a blog has set (f.e. you're a minor, or it only says "18+" which i know many writers don't accept)

your blog is completely empty i.e. you don't post/reblog stuff

you don't reblog other people's writing

you spam like posts

you've never changed the default icon/header to something else

people don't vibe with the things you reblog

your theme is a colour they don't like

a lot of the time, it comes down to everyone's preferences. god knows i've been blocked by people and didn't understand why, but frankly it's none of my business. most likely, you won't ever find out, either. everyone is creating their own online space, and sometimes that means having a quick blocking finger. i'm sorry that you won't be able to read those stories anymore but you have to accept creators' boundaries.

however, there are some things you can do and try to prevent getting blocked in the future. these are only a couple of suggestions around tumblr etiquette i've picked up on over the years; if anyone else wants to chip in here, please do!!

1. make sure your blog is, by all appearances, that of a human being

this might sound stupid because of course, you are a human, but with the recent bot wars it's all the more important to double check for red flags.

check your url. does it include a random string of numbers, lots of dashes, just a name and an adjective? all of these have been indicative of porn bots and people might block you on sight.

change your icon and your header. yes, both of them. there are lots of creators on here who make wonderful fandom related headers and icons, or you can create your own with canva. just be sure to follow creators' rules and preferably reblog their creation

change your blog title. if your account is new, it will just say "untitled", which is another indication you might not be a human. use quotes, song lyrics, anything you enjoy

add a bio. this is where you put your name or nickname (you can make one up) age, age range, links to second blogs (if applicable), more quotes, whatever. i prefer my bio short and to the point, but that doesn't have to be you.

important: do this for all blogs and side blogs you use regularly. if you have a second blog for reblogging fics, you need to put up your age there as well, or at least visibly link to your main blog so creators can see you're not a minor. the harder it is to verify that you're an adult, the more likely it is that you will get blocked

2. know the different kinds of interactions on tumblr and navigate them well

there's a difference between liking, commenting, reblogging, and reposting, and it's important. lots of people use reblogging and reposting interchangeably, but that's actually incorrect and can lead to serious mishaps. let's dissect them one by one.

liking.

you're familiar with the like from other social media platforms. you tap a post twice or hit the little heart at the bottom of the post and it's added to your likes. wonderful, right? well. tumblr is a little different.

tumblr doesn't have an algorithm. let me say that again. there is no algorithm on tumblr. i guess there is, on the for you page, but that doesn't count because it's really shit. the only important thing on tumblr is your dashboard, and your dashboard only shows original posts and the reblogs of those posts from people you follow.

no one cares about your likes. your likes don't do shit. that's why creatives on here keep talking about reblogs. you need to reblog things on tumblr in order for them to get seen. it's a snowballing effect. likes are nice and all, but they're private. they're not contributing to a story or an artwork being seen by more people. they're essentially empty interaction. what's more, should a post get deleted for whatever reason, that post is gone for you forever.

i know some people use their likes as bookmarks for things they want to look at later, but i would strongly urge you not to do that. people block serial likers, because most of the time it is, sadly, very unlikely that they will come back and actually interact with the post again. that's just the way it is. we can thank tiktok and instagram for that. again, tumblr doesn't have an algorithm. if you want to genuinely support and encourage people on here, you need to do more than liking.

commenting.

this is a step up from liking, because you're actually interacting now. a comment will show up in the activity of the person whose post you left it on and of the original poster (op)—more on that distinction in a minute. comments are encouraged especially on ask/answer type posts, or as a reply to an earlier reblog.

when it comes to fanfic, there are, again, pros and cons. you can only leave a comment from your main blog, which means that even if you have a second account where you reblog fics, there's not necessarily a link between the two. this can lead to your getting blocked if you've never reblogged a fic to your main blog. on the other hand, if people comment on your fic without reblogging it, but they do reblog other people's fics, that can also rub creators the wrong way because it creates a strange sort of hierarchy: why those fics? why not mine?

important thing to note: i am not saying that to make anyone feel bad about "just" commenting, i just want you to be aware that this might go on in a creator's head. it has in mine. i'm very aware that this is a me problem, but it's also a reason why people might get blocked out of the blue, which is why i wanted to bring it up.

reblogging.

ah yes, reblogging. reblogging is the thing that makes tumblr tumblr, and it's so easy to do. you just hit the little 🔁 symbol at the bottom of the post, and boom, it's reblogged to your own blog. everyone who follows you can now see it on their dashboard, and if they reblog it, their followers can see it, and so on and so forth. every time someone reblogs a post from you, you will get a notification in your activity, and so will the op.

reblogs are the heart and soul of tumblr. yes, original posts are (usually) individual creations, but the community aspect of this site is born through the reblog. there are different variations on how to reblog. all are valid, because all help spreading posts around.

the empty reblog is the quickest option. there's literally a quick reblog option on mobile: if you hold your finger on the reblog button for a second or so, you will see your icon appear. if you swipe in that direction, the post gets immediately reblogged to your blog. something similar can be done on desktop with the xkit browser extension. it's fast, it's easy, it gets the job done. it's perfect for when you like a post but don't have anything specific to say/reply.

the reblog with tags is the second fastest option. tags, on tumblr, are sort of the sotto voce version of comments. yes, you can use tagging to organise your blog and make your posts easily findable (is that a word?) but the real fun begins when little asides are added. you can keysmash in the tags. you can put your thoughts in the tags. you can go full caps without it looking overwhelming in the actual post. if you're just starting to comment on things, the tags are a great place to start, because the actual post will keep looking the same; the tags are just a little additional bonus for both you and the creator. this is what you would use for the majority of posts that aren't works of art in any way, too, like text posts you want to find again, polls, photographs etc.

the reblog with additions though? oh boy. that's the real stuff. imagine it as clipping on your thoughts to the post, right there for everyone to see. you can add gifs, and memes, and change the font, and change the colour, and scream, and keysmash, and ramble without limitations. it's like catnip for the op. if you reblog a fic, a moodboard, a piece of art, a gifset, whatever it is, and you put your thoughts underneath? man, it's amazing.

side note: if you're new to commenting on people's fics and you don't know what to say, i highly recommend referring to this post. (btw i linked my reblog so it can act as an example of the different forms of adding to a post: there were other reblogs before mine, and i've added tags. useful in its content and as an example!!)

reposting.

this is where we need to be careful. reblogs are great. reposts are theft. where's the difference? reposting refers to you copying another creator's work, whatever it may be, and creating a new post without any indication to the original person's efforts. even if you do include their url, you will most likely get reported and blocked. because now, you've become the op of this copied post, and the actual creator will get absolutely nothing.

you will most likely have seen banners in fic communities that state something along the lines of "don't copy or translate any of my work to this or any other site". that's what this refers to. this would also include the following:

posting another writer's story to ao3/wattpad/another fic site of your choice without their permission. you can absolutely never do this. "but what if"—NO. never. fullstop.

some creators allow translations of their work, but you can only ever share those with their explicit permission and proper credit.

saving a gif to use without linking back to the artist. this is maybe my biggest gripe. yes, i know this site sucks at making gifs searchable, but still, you can't do this. and no, "credit goes to the original artist" doesn't count, where did that bullshit even come from? it makes me so mad. that's not giving credit, that's being lazy.

3. be nice, and have fun

this is fandom, and it's supposed to be a hobby. this is supposed to be a good time. none of us are getting paid for any of this. yes, we're all passionate about what we do, whether we're looking at other people's creations or we make them ourselves. we're fans of that common thing, and isn't that great?

just a little more internet etiquette that's not really tumblr specific but could be a good reminder for everyone:

not everything is for you, and that's okay

if something's not for you, scroll away

if you don't like what someone is posting, ignore them. mute them. block them.

do not ever, and i mean ever, send anyone hate. you don't know who's on the other side of the screen. block them and move on. life's too fucking short.

don't correct people's grammar/spelling. only assholes do that. if you can't help yourself and they're a person you've interacted with before, shoot them a private message and be nice about it.

don't offer unsolicited advice. i don't care if you want to give constructive criticism to help the other person. unless they've explicitly asked you to do that, don't. you'll get blocked so quick, and you'll ruin someone's day.

if you're reading a fic that's not finished yet, don't ask for an update. yes, you're excited for the story to continue. but "part 2", "when's the next chapter out", "more please" and so on are all things that put pressure on creators whether that's your intention or not. it gives us the impression that what we've already put out is never enough. and that sucks. by all means, be excited about what comes next, but not like this.

read!! old!! fics!!!! the beauty of tumblr being the way it is is that there's zero shame in interacting with older posts. it's not like you're liking a seven year old post on instagram. in fact, if you're commenting on a seven year old fic/gifset/moodboard/artwork on tumblr, i can guarantee you're gonna make that creator's day.

i'm absolutely positive that i've forgotten something in this post even though it's longer than several of my wips, so if any of my moots want to add something that'd be great!! in fact i'm gonna tag some of you because you know what? if you've read all of this you deserve a kiss. have a wonderful day 💛

@marvelettesassemblenow @barnesafterglow @imaginearyparties @aphrogeneias @brandycranby @writing-for-marvel @foreverindreamlandd @sanguineterrain @demxters @wildlivelychild

[sleepyanimal]

7 years?!

Wow! I can't believe it's been 7 years since I have posted on this account, or really used tumblr much at all! So much has changed in these last years, I am 7 years older believe it or not!!!!

First things first, I doubt anyone will see this as I am sure many of the folks I used to interact with have moved on from here, or changed accounts. If you remember me, or see this, I would love to say hi <3

After leaving tumblr, I was able to get a pretty large following on tiktok doing aquarium related content, as well as specimen preservation tutorials and process videos (I'm @fishydaddy if you're curious!). Sadly, as many of us are probably aware, tiktok will likely be unavailable in the US this upcoming year, and I felt like it was time to come back to tumblr as it was a huge part of my adolescence. I'm not sure how much this site has changed in the years since I have been gone, but it has been absolutely fantastic going through old archival content and getting all nostalgic and inspired :,)

Looking at this old blog and seeing the work I did as a teenager makes me feel all kinds of things, but it mainly has given me the spirit to get back into art and posting again. I would love to have my content available across many platforms and hopefully set up my own website soon. I will keep this blog for archival reasons, but will likely move all of my newer postings to a new blog. I have a super hard time choosing a name for a brand (???) or social media handle, and have changed it MULTIPLE times throughout the years, but would really like to stick with one from now on. Since I am known as fishydaddy now (a very silly joke name I used not thinking I would actually gain popularity and have a hard time changing it after lol) I will probably continue using that, or a similar name, as fishydaddy is taken on a lot of platforms. I will post an update on what my new username is and how to find me across social media if y'all are interested!

If you've made it this far and are invested, here are some life updates!

----------------------------------------------------

I was able to go to college and get a degree in aquarium science, one of my main passions is aquatic animal husbandry, so being able to get a degree in a niche topic was amazing!

After moving away from home after a gap year post high school, life got pretty hard (although it was always pretty hard, just in a different way). I feel like a lot of my inspiration and drive towards art faded as I didn't have the time or energy to refine skills and learn new things. There have been a few moments where I have gotten back into it, but it has been fleeting, as been good mental health.

When I was posting on this blog, I came out as non-binary (I think I was 16 or 17 at the time?), and being in this community was a huge reason that I was able to learn about gender identity, expression, and the existence of non-binary identities. It was hard at first with family acceptance and self acceptance, as well as strings of bad relationships with straight men who didn't see me as the person I am, but all these years later I am happy to say that the age old quote is true, it DOES get better :,)

I now have been on hrt for over 6 years, and become more comfortable with myself.

~~~~I am non-binary still, on the more masculine end of things but a feminine masculine person, and use they/he pronouns~~~

Transitioning obviously doesn't fix everything, and new struggles come along with transitioning, but I am so happy with the direction my life has gone. I met an amazing person about 4 years ago and we have been together ever since. He is the first cisgender man I have dated where I felt completely understood, accepted, and valued for being truly myself. It also helps that he isn't straight (If you're a young trans person and dating PLEASE do not date someone that says they're " (whatever sexuality) but will make an *exception* for you". I've done it three times and boy oh boy does it leave some lasting scars and blows to self confidence!

Aside from gender stuff, my mental health journey has been a rocky road, but I am nearing a point where I feel I am able to work towards a better life. From childhood, I have always had intense anxiety and obsessive thoughts, which increased drastically during adolescence and morphed into full blown chronic depression, social anxiety, and executive functioning issues that I was never able to fully improve on.

When I came out to my parents at the age of 18, instead of acceptance, I was taken to an autism specialist. I guess my parents thought the reason for being transgender was autism in my case. Well, turns out both can be true (sarcasm), and 8 years later, my parents are very accepting of both my gender and neurodivergence.

This past year, I was finally able to see a psychiatrist that was able to help. My first psychiatrist was from all the way back when I was 15 and I hadn't seen one since getting prescribed antidepressants. Well turns out there are nifty genetic tests that can screen for genetic differences that can cause sensitivities or resistances to certain medications, as well as indicate certain chemical deficiencies or mental health conditions. I was on the wrong medication and given a misdiagnosis for over a decade. I feel like I wasted so much time and suffered through those years. There were good times and beautiful memories to look back on, but I was really sick for years and wasn't taken seriously/unable to be helped based on my description of the problem. It wasn't until I had a horrible depressive burnout episode when I went back to college for a fisheries and wildlife degree that I knew I HAD to do something ASAP. I completely wasted time and money, only to ghost my school, teachers, and classes without being able to communicate how badly I was doing. I took a break from school, got a job in fish health research, and got burnt out AGAIN during one of the best jobs I have ever had in my life. I knew I had to do something, and I finally was diagnosed with ADHD through genetic testing and a new psychiatrist.

The best way that I can describe this feeling I've had since I was in 5th grade, is nausea, dread, terror, fatigue, and just an overall feeling that something is very, very wrong, all the time. It wasn't just anxiety, it was something deeply unsettling that I could never escape. Well, it turns out that I literally am lacking very important chemicals for human functioning due to rapid uptake and processing of those particular chemicals, such as dopamine and adrenaline. I finally feel like I am not broken, that all this work I have been trying to do through self-betterment and therapy that didn't work wasn't my failure or lack of will. It is literally that I blast through dopamine like nobody's business and then am left with nothing, leading to a horrible feeling all the time. Since being prescribed the proper medication, I finally feel like a normal, functioning human being. Some days are hard still, but that's true for everyone. It's like I can finally see through this invisible veil that has been in front of me for my whole life. I feel like I can talk to people like when I was a kid, be myself, work on unmasking, and truly enjoy life and have fun.

Now that I am doing better, I am so excited to start working on what I love again, which is art! My medium has changed many times throughout the years, from pen & ink, to plushies, and more recently into specimen preservation and sculpting, but I always love doing EVERYTHING (ha! who would've guessed I have adhd????). My plan for this upcoming year is to really focus on practicing art, as well as create more things to share with people, be it content, or sellable art. Recently, in the town I live in, an awesome vintage market has opened and has space for an oddity seller which is right up my alley. Fingers crossed that I can get a spot there!

I also want to work more on educational content surrounding aquatic life, from marine biology, to keeping aquariums and general fish health management. This is one of my biggest passions, and my special interest. I have learned so much working in the aquatics industry over the years and would love to share the important information that I have acquired from working in public aquariums, commercial aquatic facilities, and just being a hobbyist on the side.

If you got all the way down to the bottom of this post where I just totally word vomited my entire life story, first of all, who are you sweet angel baby? (not an mfm quote I promise), and also thank you for taking the time out of your day to read some stranger's post????

Oh! and please add me on neopets if you play!!! (babymoonbetta)

Here are some fun bonus photos of me and my partner <3

[blackhairedjjun]

flowers of every color | writer's behind the scenes!

some stuff about my writing process for the fic! be warned that if you haven't caught up yet, there are spoilers

tagging people who liked and/or replied my interest check post: @agustdiv1ne @mazeinthemoon @txtistheloml @kyaneosprincess @teletubbiesssss @banggyu0308

these are pretty long so i'm putting them behind a read-more hehe

story planning:

while we've gotten plenty of yeonjun in prince outfits over the years, the main inspiration for this fic is yeonjun's opening outfit in act: sweet mirage! i saw that and was like "oh man he would be SO DASHING as a prince 😍" and just went from there

if you've been here from the start, you might know that i didn't originally plan make a series! i just word-vomited the first chapter (well, what became the first chapter) directly into tumblr's post editor because the thought of prince!yeonjun wouldn't leave me alone, especially after seeing a few other prince/commoner and prince/servant fics floating around lol. chapter 1 is also the only chapter made using tumblr's legacy editor rather than their new one (which is also why the cover pics are one big edited photo and not 3 separate photos, i couldn't figure out how to get 3 photos to line up in the legacy editor).

i honestly did not expect people to read chapter 1 but they did!! and they liked the idea!! plus even after writing chapter 1 i STILL couldn't get the idea out of my head so i decided to write it as a full story. i've written plenty of oneshots before under my (non-kpop) ao3 account, but this is my first multichapter series! so i opened google docs and made a quick outline of the story's main events.

the original outline for foec had 6 chapters + 2 endings, but as i wrote the story, i realized that more detail and scenes were needed than what i initially outlined! chapters 3 and 4 (ball preparations + the ball / gazebo dance scene) were supposed to be one chapter. chapters 5 and 6 (y/n hanging out with the chois + getting caught + punishment + intro of arranged marriage) were also supposed to be one chapter. chapters 7-9 (end of friendship, reconciling with soogyu, y/n & beomgyu talk) were also supposed to be one chapter!

i actually started writing the bad ending first before the good ending -- my reasoning was that if i were the reader, i would want to save the good ending for last so that i could end the series on a positive note. i was very surprised when people voted for the good ending first in the poll LMAO also as far as i'm concerned, both endings are canon in a "branching timeline" kind of way. they are both the real ending! i do have a soft spot for the good ending but also i love angst too much to not write a bad ending haha.

honestly most of the story beats from my original outline made it into the final fic! the biggest change has to do with queen hwayoung's and princess ajin's roles in the story (more on that below).

character notes:

when i was first brainstorming i really wanted to include both taehyun and hueningkai in the story as well, but i struggle with writing ensemble casts and choi line + y/n (+ the supporting characters in the castle) were already enough for me to handle. soobin and beomgyu were the easiest for me to incorporate into the story since they have the same last name and i could go "oh in this universe they're part of the same royal house hence the same last name" HAHA. i do imagine that the house of choi princes are also friends with tyunning (kai does get alluded to in chapter 9), but they're off doing their own adventures.

some of little moments in the fic were inspired by actual things txt have done in variety shows! yeonjun, y/n, soobin, and beomgyu playing cards in chapter 5 is based off to do ep. 53 where they also play cards. soogyu playing badminton in chapter 8 is inspired by gbgb era idol human theater where they played a little badminton by the pool. and there are a lot more small character quirks that are inspired by gifs or fancams i've seen of them haha.

queen hwayoung and princess ajin were originally not supposed to be part of the story! my original idea was the have the arranged marriage subplot be heard secondhand by through advisers so that it feels like an invisible force pulling yeonjun away from y/n. but i needed to make the threat of the arranged marriage stronger and ended up writing the scene with queen hwayoung in it for chapter 6.

princess ajin especially was a late addition -- originally she was never supposed to appear at all, never visiting the castle and only speaking through her mom / royal advisors, so there was that threat of yeonjun being married off to someone he's never even met. but after looking through the feedback of chapter 6 i realized that i kinda-sorta accidentally made setup for her oops. people were wondering what she'd be like, and it would feel too anticlimactic to never have her appear in the story, so i wrote her in. which i don't regret because i did enjoy writing her big scene in chapter 10!

speaking of which: a friend of mine asked what happens to princess ajin, and honestly i wanted to give her proper closure too! but i couldn't find a way to fit it into the story in a way that felt natural. if you ask me though, she gains some level of political independence from her mom (represented by her visiting the castle in the good ending). she still marries for political reasons, to a prince or nobleman who is also in it for the politics, and at first they treat their marriage as a business partnership. eventually they grow close and form a devoted "i'd do anything for you" bond -- not necessarily romantic in nature, but caring in its own way. (i'm describing a queerplatonic relationship basically)

tbh i don't have the energy to write another multichapter right now, but i would love to see spinoff fics for soobin and beomgyu or even taehyun and kai as princes in their own kingdoms! so if you're reading this and you want to do it, you have my blessing <3

flower notes:

while some chapter titles were planned around a specific flower representing the events & progression of the story, others were not (because of the chapter splits i talked about earlier) and i just chose whatever flower was in it lol. the planned chapter title flowers are: yellow roses (ch2), pink roses (ch4), sunflowers (ch5), striped carnations (ch7) , purple hyacinths (ch9), red roses (ch10), daffodils (GE), and white lilies (BE). the unplanned title flowers are: irises (ch1), lilies of the valley (ch3), red and purple zinnias (ch6), sweet peas (ch8).

i mostly used this website as a reference for the language of flowers, BUT i also double check with one or two other websites to make sure i'm getting an established flower meaning and not something made up! when i started fic planning i made a list of flowers with meanings that fit the main story beats and character progressions, then picked the ones with the most established meanings (i.e. supported by multiple "language of flowers" websites) and/or the ones that were appropriate for the growing season.

even though i wrote a disclaimer not to pay attention to botanical accuracy re: seasonal flowering times, i originally envisioned the fic to take place over the spring. then when it got longer, i imagined it taking place over spring and summer, so i tried (keyword: tried) to choose seasonally appropriate flowers or flowers that bloom year-round. this is hard for me because i live in a tropical country. i have never seen a lot of these flowers in person because they don't grow in the climate here, and i have no idea what a four-season year feels like. so i decided not to put time-of-year markers in the fic and leave the season ambiguous, and added that disclaimer about the flowers' accuracy.

an example of this: chapter 9 is named after purple hyacinths. i first decided on this back when the story was only supposed to take place during the spring, since hyacinths are a spring flower. i considered naming it after hydrangeas because they mean something like "thank you for understanding" (i.e. y/n going "thank you for understanding what a hard position i'm in" to yeonjun), and also because they're one of my favorite flowers. but i wasn't sure about their seasonal appropriateness since some sources said that they bloom during early summer so i changed it to hyacinths. BUT THEN the fic got long and i started imagining that the later chapters take place in the summer SO the hyacinths ended up being seasonally inappropriate after all! and hydrangeas would have been more appropriate! especially since txt literally has a song called hydrangea love out aarghhh noooo but anyway it is what it is

other flowers that didn't make the cut + their meanings: sweet william (gallantry), alstroemeria (friendship or devotion), freesia (friendship, thoughtfulness), white tulips (forgiveness, consideration, respect), thyme (courage, strength)

other notes:

the key lime pie in chapter 6 is based on a real pie that i ate at my friend's house when i visited her there and i thought it was the most delicious thing i have ever eaten. in the original draft it was a lemon tart!

i wanted to keep this series strictly sfw, but i did consider making both the good and bad endings have suggestive, fade-to-black scenes. for the good ending, the suggestive part would have involved y/n in yeonjun's room the night after their speech / before waking up together. for the bad ending, it would have happened when yeonjun visits y/n's quarters. i didn't write them bc i... am not good with anything suggestive or nsfw klsadjfklasjd

I COMPLETELY FORGOT BUT Y/N'S FATHER WAS ALSO IN THE AUDIENCE FOR THEIR SPEECH IN THE GOOD ENDING... i have no excuse for not writing him in other than I Forgot. i am so sorry but please imagine he was there

--

that's all i can think of for now! if you have other questions about foec or my writing process please please feel free to reply to this post or send an ask <3

[erigold13261]

ok somehow i only just discovered you have a d3v14nt4rt account

Why are you censoring it?

Anyway, yeah. I have a deviantart. It's actually linked in one of the tabs on my tumblr page, but you have to be on desktop or a browser to see that tab or something, and I never update that shit anyway so it's not really worth looking at.

But yes! All my social media that I use is just the same name as here "erigold13261" which makes me wonder how many people see me as a bot because of the numbers. Probably a lot.

Funnily enough, I originally did have the blog erigold to myself, but I made it a side blog because I had no idea what the difference between a main and side blog was. Once I found out I deleted that side blog and tried to change my main blog to that, but couldn't because of the like 30 day wait or something before a name becomes free after it's no longer in use.

Long story short, I made my name "erigold13261" as a place holder but forgot to grab just "erigold" when the time came and now someone else has it I think but also I had already posted art with my username and didn't feel like changing my tag brush thing.

SO yeah, if you see a social with the username "erigold13261" then it's most likely me. I have a deviantart, twitter, instagram, kofi, artfight, redbubble, and probably some other sites with that name. It works out too because a lot of other sites already have the name "erigold" taken, but none have "erigold13261" taken whenever I try!

Edit: Just remembered, only site to not follow my naming rule is youtube, for some reason it's just "Eri Gold" instead of one word with numbers. Idk why I did that, but I did.

[a-place-to-put-my-thoughts]

12/30/24 2:30AM

I tried fitting this into the tags of a post on my main, but it didn't work, so I'm posting it here. If this ends up "outing me", oh well. I need to get it out there.

This is a rant/ramble about some people I once called friends. Yes, this is a vaguepost, but only because one of them is blocked by me, and the other recently blocked me. I also don't want to tie their names to this in case someone stumbles upon this post and attacks me/them for this. I will be using emojis in place of their names. Read more if you want, I don't care. If the people this post is about manage to find this, read if you'd like. I'm sharing my unfiltered opinions and recollection of what happened.

🥭 - Ex-Friend 1: Still have negative feelings about them, have them blocked.

🥦 - Ex-Friend 2: Neutral about them, they've blocked me.

🍄 - Friend: Once close friends with the other two, now separated. I'm still friends with them.

Alright. I was a part of a once tight-knit group of friends. Three of them were closer than the rest upon first glance. We all found each other through two shared fandom interests that were closely related to one another. After a while, the group separated, but me, a few others, and 🍄 all stuck around. 🍄 was still in contact with 🥭and 🥦, since they were so close.

🍄 starts to tell the rest of us - behind the other two's backs - about what they're talking about. They were criticizing one of the fandoms/fandom creators that we once shared. In my opinion, the criticisms were unfair or just didn't apply to the creator. Two of the criticisms were saying a slur (fag to be specific) and art theft.

At first, this sounds crazy. How could I defend this?

Well, the context in which the creator had said the slur is British/European and had happened YEARS ago. For those of you who don't know, they call cigarettes fags. I don't remember if they had apologized or acknowledged the incident, but personally, given the year in which it had happened, I forgave them for it.

As for the art theft, the creator went on their account on Discord and made a lengthy announcement about it. They explained that they had commissioned an artist for merch, and the artist used a design from another web page. They didn't question the design at first since the artist was thought to be a trusted designer. Once it was found it was stolen art, the creator removed it from their merch store and made their apology.

The other reasons they "criticized" the creator was because of their ethnicity and gender/sexual orientation. You may have noticed that I've been using they/them to refer to everyone in this post, and I'm going to keep doing that. It doesn't matter if this creator was genderqueer or cisgendered, gay or straight, black or white. They can't change those parts about themselves, and so it felt so weird and downright wrong that they were dogging on them because of it.

Now, at this point, they've just left a sour taste in my mouth. Sure, it frustrated me, but I wasn't going to make a callout post on my twitter dot com about it. Then came 2020.

Before I explain this next part, I wanna say ACAB all the way. The system is busted, and cops are inherently bad. That does not mean they all deserve death. Call me a bootlicker for valuing human life. I'm not condoning the deaths of others, and that goes both ways. If a cop kills a guy, the cop should be held responsible. If a guy kills a cop, the guy should be held responsible.

Anyways.

During the BLM marches and protests, 🍄 told us that the other two - namely 🥭 - was advocating and celebrating the deaths of police officers, calling everyone who disagreed a bootlicker. That irked me so bad.

One night, similar to this one at the time of writing, my emotions were high. I saw a tumblr post about the fandom criticizing those who hate on the creator, and I agreed. I reblogged it but decided to spill my thoughts in the tags. I exploded, vagueposting about 🥭 and 🥦 and what they've been talking about. After that, I went to bed.

The next morning, I checked my phone to see that they had noticed. 🥦 dmed me asking if it was about them. My emotions flooded back, and I sternly told them that yeah, it was about them and their shitty behavior.

The friend group split even more that day. I still feel guilty about it sometimes because I was ultimately the one who snapped, but I'm sure something else would have happened to cause us to split. The way it occurred back then just so happened to be explosive and damaging. I completely cut ties with 🥭 since they were the sort of loudest voice in the room when it came to their opinions.

After a while, I tried reconnecting with 🥦. It was awkward, of course, but we still sent a few messages every few months or years. Then, a few months ago, I went to check their blog and found that it "didn't exist." I knew I had been blocked since their pfp was still there, the account didn't say deactivated, and others were still reblogging from them. I don't know what changed, but whatever.

After the initial blow-up, though, 🥭 was still very much.. I'm not sure if angry is the right word, but petty? I suppose, and was vagueposting about me and the friend group. I still feel my teeth grind together out of instinct thinking about them.

Despite all this.. I hope they've grown as a person. I hope they've ruminated about what they've said and done and changed the way they act for the better. I know 🥭 and 🥦 are still in contact with each other. I hope they've grown. I hope they're doing well despite the times I've imagined punching 🥭 square in the nose for what they've said. If they haven't changed, fuck me for being optimistic, eh?

Some small part of me hopes one of them finds this and puts 2 and 2 together. I hope if they read this, they know I still think about them and what I've done. I know the way I went about it was wrong. The temptation to add their @'s to this post is strong, but having learned from my previous actions, I won't. I don't want to dig up the hatchet and beat the dead horse since I know that'll only bring me grief, hardships, and even more stress than I'm currently under.

Well, anyway. Goodnight, dear reader. I hope you have a good night's rest, wherever you are.