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butterfly-ribbon · 1 month ago

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something i like about mizuki and rui's interactions is that the first time he addresses her with the suffix "-kun" when he's asking about her name? but in every instance after this, he drops it even though he uses it to address /literally everyone/ (including the cis girls, he calls nene "nene-kun" for instance). makes me wonder if mizuki herself voiced her discomfort with it after explaining that she's trans to him or if he picked up on this on his own? either way, i like that he's considerate towards her even if he doesn't fully Get her...

i also love that mizuki here immediately assumes (perhaps a little unfairly towards rui even if it's understandable) that there's some narrativization on rui's end towards her which is rooted in a voyeuristic fascination in her as a person with a unique gendered experience that ties into how she's often treated as an object or an exhibit by everyone? it also makes sense in the context of her genre awareness and performativity bc mizuki is /very/ hypercognizant of tropes and the archetypes she's often forced to occupy?

it's this the expectation of herself as a source of entertainment to others. trans girls often exist in media to be ogled at and othered. she doesn't see reflections of herself in the world. she sees caricatures. so of course she'd assume tht this is what rui wants of her. of course that isn't the case, but trust is so difficult. commodification of transfemininity and transfemininity as performance being widely seen as a source of entertainment and comedy are things that are very normalized in pop culture and media… even when trans girls aren't treated as jokes, they merely exist to reinforce the femininity of cis girls as innately more authentic. this is something mizuki absolutely knows considering her genre awareness and how much she loves to engage with fiction, but i think it's also interesting that in the context of her relationship with the other girls in niigo there's this conflict taking place in terms of being the manic pixie dream girl who purposefully elevates the cis girls by setting the stage for them and helping them address their problems (she does this in carnation recollection, mirage of light, our escape for survival and many other instances) versus using them to affirm her own femininity … we see this the most with ena, but i think this is present with mafuyu too especially in the way she represents mizuki's hope.

mizuki's introduction to the other girls in person also establishes that she's very openly genre savvy and goes out of her way to point out narrative conventions of 'isekai stories' and other media tropes relating to her social situations in a way that feels very deliberate as a parallel to being cognizant of societal prejudices and gender constructs and the way they're sustained through pop culture so she has to co-opt them for her own benefit bc so much of mizu1 is about mizuki using fiction and horror stories as a medium through which she can engage with herself and the other girl but i think this is meaningful insofar as it tells us that mizuki always understood how abuse and misogyny work bc it's been her experience for her entire life… it's interesting that she's one of the few characters in the cast that's an active Anime Fan (ie, going out to try and get merch, tickets, the soundtracks, etc), but the expression around it is /very much/ like trans culture, like how a girl is engaged with things. it isn't about figures or being the ultimate oshi, she enjoys the characters, she enjoys what goes into the creation, she's engaged with how she relates to characters over them being "attractive." there's so much… about her and her genre awareness and also her social awareness… it feels very special bc very few stories go out of their way to acknowledge the fact that trans girls are usually the demographic with so much perspective on women's issues, both bc of their own lived experience and bc they feel like they /have/ to be knowledgeable to prove their own abuse and make up for the taking up so much space in women's spaces? it's motivated by internalized guilt but it's also out of a genuine desire to connect with women and womanhood … so many anime fandoms are often sustained by trans girls and that's something i always notice whenever i'm on twitter or tumblr? magical girl and idol series fan spaces are always occupied by trans girls and the same can be said for things like gundam? mizuki is the type of trans girl who's more into the former than latter but it's still important to note, and it makes me wonder how much of an overlap there is between how that works in english speaking fandoms and japanese ones? i imagine there's a big overlap, but it's still something i'm interested in seeing something more concrete about.

but yeah, the way mizuki is so invested in the process of creation and connecting with the characters very much parallels how she's the MV animator/editor for niigo and how her entire work process is predicated around having an intimate connection with ena's art, kanade's music and mafuyu's lyrics to display them in the best way possible? we know that she was creating edits for her favorite magical girls anime before she joined niigo (and she probably still does in her own time). trans girls often connecting and finding worth in things that cgirls have cast off as childish as well - "i don't need this" versus "this makes me feel like i can have the girlhood i was denied." the lesbian contingent in these spaces is also very strong. i feel that a lot of cgirls get disillusioned and have to come back and address the internalized misogyny around it. magical girls being co-opted by misogynistic otaku also makes it difficult, but it feels broadly meaningful to actually engage with magical girls and how they are genuinely made for young women and even more than that. also the editing … the AMVs and stuff and how it's about fixating on a piece and going through all the clips, closely editing … she's probably rewatched her favorite shows and episodes so often that it's easy for her to think about what she wants to go where. i imagine she would feel self conscious actually sharing her thoughts but also … we know how mizuki is so active in the nightcord chat and how much she fills the space with ena so i wouldn't be surprised. there's a side story where mizuki invites the others out to see a movie bc she doesn't want to watch it alone, she wants someone to exchange thoughts with … it feels so personally driven, this rare chance of hers to … try to show herself to others? she never wants to tell others directly, but through fiction and other things…

mizuki is also a fan of minori but not once does she identify as Anything More than that and of course idols are relevant to mizuki, bc her being Genre Aware extends to anime/manga (specifically magical girls and idols) and films (mainly horror). in the broad context of 'oshi' as a term this is important bc mizuki likes her and thinks she's cool and admires her, but she sees idols as ppl ... she sees girls as ppl.

i also think about mizuki and "loneliness" here in the context of transmisogyny as a system to isolate transfems, to deny them safety and community and solidarity in order to enable everyone else treating them like disposable sex dolls. many ppl will pretend that the idea of transfems being uniquely threatening or predatory is something that came from genuine concerns about sexual safety (especially terfs with their "concerns" about "males in women's spaces") when the truth is that it's a deliberate campaign to convince ppl that transfems don't deserve to be treated as human beings, never mind women, they're degendered objects (aka second class women). ppl aren't /born/ believing that transfems are more dangerous than cis men; nobody independently arrives at this train of thought as much as they're conditioned into it by the patriarchy in order to do their part in maintaining the exploitation of transfems as scapegoats for the sins of cis men even if they're not conscious of it. this just makes them gullible agents of the system.

a huge difference between how 'average' misogyny & transmisogyny operate is isolation. if you're a cis woman who's the subject of constant misogyny, it's still possible to find community within cis women. transmisogynistic oppression goes unnamed, isn't shared by any peers bc transfems rarely know other transfems growing up, and is never called out by anyone even adults. it's true that all systemic violence masquarades as personal violence, but i think this goes doubly so for transmisogyny especially bc the 'mainstream' understanding of transmisogyny even in queer spaces is that it doesn't exist as long as you use a trans woman's correct pronouns or recognize them as women (and even then ppl will always make excuses when they're called out for using they/them and it's not even called transmisogyny; it's just transphobia).

when trans women exist around others they're either reduced to sex objects/freaks or mothers/manic pixie dream girls who take on the brunt of emotional labor in social dynamics, and i think all of this informs mizuki's idea of loneliness here? rui may be well intentioned, but there's an inherent power imbalance between them as a cis guy and a trans girl (even though she's pretransition, it doesn't change this) that contextualizes their isolation and this is something mizuki is obviously bitter about… it's true that her family is supportive and gives her refuge in the form of her own room to retreat back to when the world is too cruel to her, but this is simply not enough when the goal of transmisogyny as an oppressive systemic force is to erase transfems like her from public spaces, which in some part also explains why mizuki feels so insecure about her coping mechanism being avoidance and running away bc it probably feels like she's letting transmisogyny 'win', so to speak? despite how much we see her being treated like an object and an exhibit in incredibly dehumanizing ways as well as all the microaggressions from so many ppl (even the ones who care about her like an and rui) we never see any teachers standing up for her? all they care about is getting her to attend enough so she doesn't have to repeat a year and such, which reads more like they're doing bc it's inconvenient for /themselves/ otherwise to have to deal with her more if she's held back a year. the fact that she tells rui that she hopes he can find friends that he has more in common with than just solitude in response to him trying to tell her that being lonely isn't all that bad is so loaded bc rui is a cis boy, so there's no way he understands the kind of isolation she's had to endure and the fact that he's able to speak positively about isolation understandably makes her bitter for these reasons.

mizuki joking about 'losing' to rui at making friends even though she has "better communication skills" when by that she means that due to her lived experience as a transfem she's had to become very hypercognizant of social norms and conventions in order to mold herself into a very palatable expression of femininity to be accepted by others but her hypersensitivity towards these things still isn't enough and rui can surpass her simply due to the fact that he's a cis guy...

#project sekai #gamo.txt

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errielovesu · 10 months ago

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Sesshomaru x Fem!Reader (smut)

Cw: Violence, drugging, breeding, oral sex, sex in general, humiliation (?), mentions of sex work/prostitution

A/N: first smut, first fan fic what feels like since 2021, I would’ve wrote this in second person pov but I just ended up doing first pov, I hope you enjoy (^^)

Word count: 2,131 words (wow)

The flash of blush that passes through my body could be enough to warm me up…foggy vision and no knowledge of what or where i’m at.

“Wake up.” I hear a voice say, funny that this thing thinks i’ve slept, I sit there immobile, i’m not afraid but i’m unsure on how to address the current situation. “I know you heard me, you low level thing” thing? i’m not some thing? I slowly peak my head towards the door where the voice comes from, tall, long haired, that’s as much as my eyes can figure out. “Who are you? What did you do to me? Where am” I got cut off by the sudden steps towards me, slowly he comes into my vision.

A demon! “Tell me, why does your kind always say so many words with no meaning.” I asked what I think are very meaningful questions! “What do you want” I snark, quickly i’m met with pain. He slapped me. He slapped me? “Do you not seem to remember? You tried to kill me. Pathetic attempt as you failed miserably and got yourself into this situation.” he said, his voice deep and cold, he reaches down and pets my back, leaving a trail of goosebumps along my body, “i’m not sure I understand, before coming here i was…? i was?” I don’t remember anything at all, “What? You can’t recall your stupid actions, can’t you own up?” I shiver, usually I can get out these situations with a quick smile and wink but I sure this time it might be over for me.

“My name is Lord Sesshomaru” Lord? who actually is this guy. “Lord..?” I stammer out, “Yes, that’s what I just say did I not?” yet another smart ass response, he slowly sits down in front of me, his face more visible now, “Lord Sesshomaru whatever I did i’m sure I can fix but I don’t wish to be tied down like livestock.” I don’t think i’ve been here for a short period of time, i’m starving and weak, I need to do whatever I need to do to get this so called demon lord to release me. “You can fix?” Slowly his hand approached my face, the stands of hairs framing my face get moved out the way, his long nails caress my face enough to give me goosebumps once again, my body is afraid but i’m not, I want out of this place. “If you claim you can fix this attempt of murder that you tried to commit, what shall you do?” Trying to make out his face for some kind of weakness but I fail once more, i’m blind into this, only a figure talks to me, “I can pay you a lot of money, I kn—“ Pain meets my face one more, the familiar slap i felt before, “I’m not in need of money you pet” this time his voice scares my body once more, my body is slowly becoming numb, my joins hurt and i’m losing hope, money always works? everyone wants money? “What do you want then, demon.” I spit out almost defeated, his hand reaches out, I prepare for the slap i’ll get, “You’re willing to do anything? Without denying me?” No slap? Anything? What is he thinking, i’m afraid now, my senses slowly returning and I can smell this place, i’m terrified. “What do you need, Lord?” I vomit out, I don’t enjoy feeling defeated this way. “What is it that your body can do?” My body? Oh. My pride swallowed the fact I am naked, I look down to my figure, my breast, my core, quickly I pull my legs to my chest covering myself, he reaches out and slams my legs down to their original position, “You said anything to get out, you can’t fight? you’re too weak…you should just give up yourself to me now.” Give myself up? Slight beads form in my eyes, I gave up this kind of work ages ago, “I know what kind of filthy work you did…it’s no secret you used to give yourself up to other demons” Sesshomuro? Have I worked with him before? “Yeah I did, years ago, are you forming some kind of revenge plan because I didn’t do you?” My mouth is going to get me killed, “You didn’t do me because I would never pick some thing to help me through my issues, your body wouldn’t even be able to hand my touch” His cold voice makes me want to snark at him, his hands reach out to me once more, this time i’m afraid of where he might reach, my breath hitched his hand wonders around my neck, afraid he’ll lower his hands more my body trembles in his touch, my hands tied behind me and my ankles tied as well. Sesshomuro gets up and leaves the room quickly he comes back with a tea cup, “You should drink this. I don’t want to mess with such a weak body” He holds up the cup to my mouth, I drink the liquid, not to worried what it could be from the strong smell of tea the tea cup gives out, slowly I consume the liquid, my body feels warm again. “I’ll be back.” He closes the door behind him, a big sigh leaves my body when seconds later I lose consciousness.

“You can’t handle anything can’t you?” A muffled voice interrupts my sleep, “You’re body is warmer than usual. Pathetic how the body can submit itself.” What is he talking about, my eyes feel too heavy to open and my body even heavier to move, my face is lifted up by his cold hand, “Tell me human, why is it that your body yearns for me” I can’t formulate a coherent sentence for him, “Too stupid to talk?” His thumb caresses my lower lip, slightly parting my lips together his cold finger slithers its way inside my mouth, “If you’re mouth is this warm I wish to see what other places are.” My eyes slowly wake up once more, his face close to mind, his finger in my mouth it’s all so weird and I can’t process anything around me, his finger slips out of my mouth, “Please what do you want from me?” I whine out in desperation, my body slowly regaining strength, “I want you to serve me with your body” My body snaps away from him in protest, I don’t want to ever touch a demon in that way ever again…I promised myself. My thoughts merge together I can’t formulate thoughts again, what is going on with me. “Seems that it’s finally taking action, wether you want to or not your stupid cunt will be attracted to me”

What? I feel a heat rush through my body, my heart beat accelerating, Lord Sesshomaru drugged me? For sex? I can’t think straight, slowly I feel it, the wetness build up on my sex, my nipples hard and my face flushed, “Shouldn’t you be embarrassed? hah..your body is dripping for me you animal.” My body is too weak to stop his advance, his face close to mine, his hands grab my waist and pick me up, my legs wrap onto his body uncontrollably my body needs to be close to his, I need friction, my body needs pleasure, it feels as he’s carrying me away, shortly my body is pressed into a floor, Sesshomaru towering over me and my body, he lowers down and kisses me, not gently, these are desperate kisses, sloppy kisses, my body only responds by kissing him as well, the interchanges of kisses fuels my body more, I need more, Sesshomarus hand slowly wonder on my body, caressing my neck till he reaches my harden nipples, he isn’t afraid to start playing with them as he stops kissing me and moves his mouth towards my neck, he pushes his teeth into my neck, my body is feeling so much pleasure I can’t feel any pain, I want more. He cups my breast and slaps them, the feeling only fueling my desire for more, his hand move to my face and quickly he lifts me up, “Your mind has sure changed, you’re wet and warm” looking up to him his eyes are red, his fangs longer than before and quickly he grabs my hair and positions me right on his lap, my face…close to his cock, it’s begging to be taken out, “You’ll do me a big favor you pathetic whore” he’s sitting down and i’m on all fours, my ass up in the air exposing everything there is to hide, he slowly pulls his twitching cock out, no time is wasted when he pulls my face straight down, stuffing my mouth with his giant member, I slurp and bob my head for his pleasure, he moves his hand and grabs my ass in the air, my ankles still bonded together pushing my thighs together, Sesshomarus finger wander around my body till he gives in and starts running his finger down my slit, wet and warm, all he can think about his shoving himself deep in me. His other hand pulls my mouth from around his cock, he grabs my face and leads my body to his lap, my dripping sex begging for his cock to fill it up, “You help yourself to it, i’m not going to do everything for you” Slowly I start to position his big head around my entrance, i’m afraid he’s too big for me and he’ll break me, when I slowly ascend into him, Sesshomaru slams himself inside me, he isn’t gentle, rapid strokes meet my core, I can’t help but let out moans and whines, my breast bouncing on his face as his red demon eyes seem to almost want to eat me whole, hands tied behind back as he forces and uses me as his doll, he growls and hums as I squeeze around him. “You gave up this work for what reason? Your tight cunt should always be put to use, you’re unbelievably stupid for doing this, you’ll have to endure me for however long I want” Sesshomaru snarks at me, he stops and throws me on my stomach, positioning himself once again and slamming himself in me, my cunt swallowing every single inch of his cock, unsure how i’m taking him so well I only have pleasure in my head, I need to finish, I need to make him finish, his cold hand lift me up and once again he sinks his teeth into my neck this type more aggressive than before, moans escape my mouth and I can’t contain it anymore, it feels so good, he feels so good, he throws me back on bed and drags my ass up again, slamming once more into me, his hand grabbing

my hips and i’m used like his doll again, all I feel is him. His strokes start to get more sloppy as I feel him twitch inside me, I can’t help but beg for him, beg for his seed in me, i’ve never gotten any in me and right now my body is only asking for it. “The stupid thing wants my cum? Are you even deserving of such treatment, to carry my off spring inside you?” I can’t help but just nod at his words, I want every single drop he has to offer, his strokes filling up every single part of my canal, begging more he shoves his finger in my mouth and forces me up, he cover my mouth with them as he becomes more aggressive, his cock feeling bigger than before in me, my muffled whines and begs only makes him go even faster and faster, he keeps going until I feel it, everything inside me, the warm liquid filling up my womb as he keeps fucking it into me, more whines follow my climax as I clench around his cock and shiver in pleasure. Sesshomaru quickly removes himself from inside me and flips me over, his tounge swirling around his bite marks as he cleans up my blood, his face, his hair, everything you see. He leaves the room and snarks, “If you did give up such work years ago, why does your body still swallow me up everytime, what would others think? A human girl submitting herself to yet another powerful demon, think about that while my warm seed is inside you, farewell.”

#smut #sesshomaru #sesshomaru x reader #smut with plot #inuyasha #inuyasha x reader #fanfic #lord sesshoumaru #sesshoumaru fanart #inuyasha smut #inuyasha anime #anime #manga #fan fiction #writers on tumblr

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astroamorsworld · 7 months ago

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Mars Return Chart

I feel like not a lot of people talk about Mars Return Charts on here and i think they’re pretty important tbh. Is it because they’re every 2 years or so? Idk. So, in this post i’m gonna break down what it means to have Mars in all 12 houses in your Mars return chart. Also I have a mini announcement to make at the end of this post so I hope you guys like it☺️

Mars in the 1st house: This Mars placement fuels your motivation and desire to take action. You'll likely feel a surge of energy to pursue your goals and make things happen. The 1st house is associated with your sense of self. Mars here can push you to explore who you are and what you want to achieve. It's a time for self-discovery and taking charge of your life. Mars' influence can make you more outspoken and confident. You might find yourself taking initiative and readily expressing your opinions. While assertiveness is positive, be mindful of an impulsive streak that can come with this placement. Channel your energy productively and avoid acting rashly. It's important to find a healthy balance for your energy. Engage in physical activities to channel your drive and avoid burnout. Meditation or mindfulness practices can also help you manage your assertiveness.

Mars in the 2nd house: Mars in the 2nd house fuels your desire to accumulate wealth and possessions. You might feel a strong urge to work hard and increase your material security. The 2nd house also ties to self-worth. This Mars return could prompt you to re-evaluate what gives your life meaning and how you measure your value. Are you driven by external validation or internal purpose? You might become more assertive about your financial worth. Negotiations, asking for raises, or pursuing new income streams could be on the horizon. Be mindful of impulsive spending habits that can come with Mars' influence. Channel your drive into wise investments or building a sustainable budget. This could be a time to re-evaluate your relationship with possessions. Are they tools that empower you or burdens that hold you back? Consider decluttering or investing in meaningful items. It's important to find a healthy balance between drive and responsible management. Acknowledge your desire for security without letting it consume you.

Mars in the 3rd house: Mars in the 3rd house fuels your desire to connect and express yourself. You might find yourself more talkative, engaged in debates, or actively seeking out new information. The 3rd house is associated with learning and short-distance travel. This Mars return could ignite your curiosity and make you eager to learn new things, take short trips, or explore new ways of communicating. Mars' energy can help you be more assertive and proactive in your relationships with siblings, neighbors, and classmates. It's a good time to strengthen existing bonds or forge new connections based on shared interests. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or disagreements due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into healthy debate and active listening to avoid unnecessary conflict. This placement can boost your productivity in areas related to the 3rd house. You might find yourself tackling projects, errands, and communication tasks with renewed vigor. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and diplomacy in your communication. Express yourself confidently but be mindful of others' perspectives.

Mars in the 4th house: Mars in the 4th house fuels your desire to create a secure and comfortable home environment. You might feel motivated to redecorate, renovate, or tackle home improvement projects. The 4th house is associated with family lineage and emotional roots. This Mars return could prompt you to explore your family history, address past issues, or strengthen connections with family members. You might become more assertive about your needs within the home environment. Are you getting the emotional support you deserve? Now's the time to communicate openly and establish healthy boundaries. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or tension within the family due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into productive conversations and focus on finding solutions. This placement can lead to a surge of energy for activities related to the home. You might find yourself tackling domestic chores with renewed vigor or taking initiative on home improvement projects. The key is to find a healthy balance between taking action and respecting the needs of others in your home environment. Be assertive but prioritize open communication and collaboration.

Mars in the 5th house: Mars in the 5th house fuels your passion and desire for creative expression. You might feel a strong urge to engage in artistic pursuits, hobbies, or simply find new ways to express yourself. The 5th house is associated with pleasure, fun, and games. This Mars return could ignite your desire for entertainment, social interaction, and lighthearted activities. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and proactive in your romantic life. You might find yourself taking initiative, expressing your desires openly, or attracting passionate connections. Be mindful of the potential for competitiveness in your creative pursuits or romantic endeavors due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into healthy competition and focus on enjoying the process rather than just winning. This placement can boost your energy for activities related to the 5th house. You might find yourself tackling creative projects with renewed vigor, seeking out new hobbies, or planning fun outings with loved ones. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and collaboration in your creative pursuits and relationships. Express yourself confidently but be open to feedback and enjoy the experience of connecting with others.

Mars in the 6th house: Mars in the 6th house fuels your desire to optimize your daily routines and become more efficient. You might find yourself tackling chores with renewed vigor, streamlining your workday, or taking initiative to improve your work environment. The 6th house is associated with health and well-being. This Mars return could prompt you to prioritize healthy habits, exercise routines, or address any lingering health concerns. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and proactive in your professional life. You might find yourself taking on new challenges at work, advocating for yourself or your colleagues, or tackling problems head-on. Be mindful of the potential for conflict with colleagues or disagreements about work styles due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into productive solutions and focus on collaboration. This placement can lead to a surge of energy for work-related tasks and daily routines. You might find yourself tackling projects with renewed focus and completing tasks efficiently. The key is to find a healthy balance between taking action and taking care of yourself. Be assertive at work but prioritize a healthy work-life balance and avoid burnout.

Mars in the 7th house: Mars in the 7th house fuels your desire for dynamic and passionate partnerships. You might find yourself taking initiative in existing relationships or actively seeking out new connections that challenge and stimulate you. The 7th house is associated with partnerships, contracts, and negotiations. This Mars return could prompt you to focus on strengthening existing partnerships, working collaboratively towards shared goals, or negotiating better terms in your professional or personal collaborations. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and outspoken in your relationships. You might find yourself communicating your needs more openly or taking a more active role in decision-making. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or power struggles due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into healthy debate and compromise to avoid unnecessary conflict. This placement can lead to a surge of interest in connecting with others. You might find yourself putting yourself out there more, attending social events, or actively seeking out new collaborations. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and cooperation in your partnerships. Be confident in expressing your needs but prioritize open communication, empathy, and respect for your partner's perspective.

Mars in the 8th house: Mars in the 8th house fuels your desire for deep personal transformation. You might find yourself confronting your fears and vulnerabilities, exploring shadow aspects of yourself, or undergoing a period of significant emotional growth. The 8th house is associated with shared resources, intimacy, and death and rebirth. This Mars return could prompt you to address financial matters with partners, explore deeper levels of intimacy in your relationships, or confront issues of power and control within partnerships. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and passionate in intimate relationships. You might find yourself expressing your desires openly, confronting intimacy issues head-on, or taking the lead in exploring new forms of intimacy. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or power struggles due to Mars' assertive nature, especially regarding shared resources or intimacy. Channel your energy into productive conversations and focus on finding solutions that benefit all parties involved. This placement can ignite a desire to confront taboos or delve into hidden aspects of life and death. You might be drawn to explore psychology, delve into occult subjects, or research your family history. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and vulnerability during this transformative period. Embrace your courage to confront challenges but also allow yourself to be open and receptive to the process of change.

Mars in the 9th house: Mars in the 9th house fuels your desire for adventure, learning, and exploring new horizons. You might find yourself yearning to travel, pursue higher education, or delve deeper into philosophical or spiritual questions. The 9th house is associated with belief systems, philosophy, and long-distance travel. This Mars return could prompt you to re-evaluate your core values, challenge your existing beliefs, or embark on a journey (physical or intellectual) to broaden your perspective. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and proactive in your pursuit of knowledge. You might find yourself actively engaging in debates, taking initiative in discussions, or seeking out teachers and mentors who challenge your thinking. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or clashes due to Mars' assertive nature, especially regarding differing beliefs or philosophies. Channel your energy into healthy debate and respectful exchange of ideas. This placement can spark a curiosity about different cultures, religions, or ways of life. You might find yourself drawn to travel abroad, immerse yourself in new traditions, or connect with people from diverse backgrounds. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and open-mindedness during this period of exploration. Be confident in your beliefs but also be receptive to new perspectives and willing to learn from others.

Mars in the 10th house: Mars in the 10th house fuels your desire for accomplishment, recognition, and advancement in your career. You might find yourself taking initiative at work, pursuing leadership roles, or going the extra mile to achieve your professional goals. The 10th house is associated with reputation, public image, and authority figures. This Mars return could prompt you to refine your professional image, assert your expertise, or take on projects that enhance your standing in your field. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and proactive in your career pursuits. You might find yourself advocating for yourself or your ideas, negotiating for promotions, or taking the lead on challenging projects. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or power struggles with colleagues or superiors due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into productive competition, focus on collaboration, and navigate professional situations strategically. This placement can lead to a surge of energy and motivation for your career. You might find yourself tackling projects with renewed focus, exceeding expectations, and actively pursuing your ambitions. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and diplomacy in your career pursuits. Be confident in your abilities but prioritize teamwork, respect for authority, and building strong professional relationships.

Mars in the 11th house: Mars in the 11th house fuels your desire to connect with others on a deeper level and build strong friendships. You might find yourself taking initiative in group activities, advocating for causes you believe in, or actively seeking out like-minded people to connect with. The 11th house is associated with groups, communities, and hopes for the future. This Mars return could prompt you to get involved in social causes, collaborate with others towards shared goals, or work on projects that benefit the greater good. Mars' energy can make you more assertive and outspoken in group settings. You might find yourself taking initiative in group projects, advocating for your ideas, or inspiring others to take action on a cause you care about. Be mindful of the potential for arguments or clashes within groups due to Mars' assertive nature. Channel your energy into productive discussions, find common ground, and focus on achieving the best outcome for the group. This placement can spark a surge of enthusiasm and initiative within groups. You might find yourself taking charge of projects, motivating others, and working collaboratively to achieve your shared goals. The key is to find a healthy balance between assertiveness and collaboration within your social circles. Be confident in your ideas but prioritize open communication, respect for others' perspectives, and working towards a common vision.

Mars in the 12th house: Mars in the 12th house fuels your desire to delve deeper into your subconscious mind, explore hidden desires or fears, and confront any shadow aspects that might be holding you back. The 12th house is associated with intuition, dreams, and the unseen realms. This Mars return could prompt you to pay closer attention to your intuition, explore the meaning of your dreams, or delve into spiritual or meditative practices. Mars' assertive energy can manifest as an inner critic during this time. Be mindful of negative self-talk and challenge limiting beliefs that might be holding you back. Channel your Mars energy into healthy self-assertion and inner strength. The 12th house can also be associated with hidden enemies or past emotional wounds. Be mindful of resurfacing past conflicts or anxieties. Channel your Mars energy into facing these issues head-on and finding inner peace. This placement can bring a surge of energy for activities related to the 12th house. You might find yourself drawn to creative pursuits that tap into your subconscious, delve into research or healing practices, or dedicate time to introspection and self-reflection. The key is to find a healthy balance between introspection and taking action. Embrace the opportunity for self-exploration but don't get lost in negativity. Channel your Mars energy into positive self-improvement and use your newfound intuition to guide you forward.

I hope you guys enjoyed that post! So as I said at the start of the post, I wanted to announce that i’ll be doing big 3 and big 6 readings! So if you’d like one, DM me or fill out my google form here!

Check my pinned for more💖

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desi2go · 17 days ago

Text

Christmas Scavenger Hunt

pairing: Jisung x reader

words: 4,3k

warnings: fluff, christmas

summary: You and Jisung share a magical holiday experience when Jisung plans a scavenger hunt filled with clues tied to your most cherished memories.

author's note: Hey guys! It's been a while since I posted something. Anyways, I'm back! I had so much fun writing this and btw it's for the StayblrHolidayEvent. I hope you enjoy it <3 Merry Christmas to yall!

-> @stayblrofficial

The first snow of December had come earlier than expected this year, layering the little town in a soft, powdery white. Everything felt quieter, more magical – the world had slowed down just enough to let her breathe. As you walked briskly through the streets towards Parchment Palace, the small independent bookstore where you worked. Your breath was foggy in the frosty air, twinkling lights lined the lampposts and wreaths decorated the storefronts with pops of red ribbon. You absolutely loved Christmas. It had always been your favourite time of year with hot chocolate, the smell of pine and cinnamon as well as Christmas movies you had watched a hundred times without getting bored. By now, you could quote every Christmas related movie that was ever produced. This year, though, felt different. There was something – or rather, someone – that made your cheeks warm even in the winter chill.

Jisung.

It had been only four months since you and Jisung started seeing each other. Four months of easy laughter, long conversations and quiet meaningful moments. He wasn’t the most outgoing guy due to his social anxieties, but he had this gentle, thoughtful way about him. Like he always noticed things others didn’t. You liked that about him, you liked a lot about him, actually.

The bell above Parchment Palace jingled as you stepped inside, the familiar smell of paper and vanilla candles greeted you. Sofia, your cheerful coworker and oldest friend, looked up from the counter and grinned widely. “Morning Y/n” she said, brushing her curly hair out of her face. “Someone’s looking extra giddy today” You rolled your eyes, a smile still spreading over your lips. “I’m just excited about Christmas”

She smirked, wiggling with her eyebrows. “You mean you’re excited about Christmas with Jisung” At her suggestion, you fought the blush that crept up your cheeks. “Maybe”

Sofia chuckled, holding up a small envelope that she waved through the air. “Speaking of, this was mysteriously dropped off for you earlier. No return address, no name. Just To Y/n. Care to explain?” You reached out after hanging up your jacket. “It’s from Jisung, isn’t it?” you murmured while Sofia urged you to find it out, observing the letter behind your back. Your heart skipped as your fingers brushed over the neatly folded paper. As you opened it, you immediately recognised Jisung’s handwriting, slightly messy but unmistakably his.

A little clue to start your day: Find where we first sat with coffee for two. There’s something there only for you to see.

Your lips parted in disbelief, rereading the few lines over and over again. “He’s sending me on a scavenger hunt?” Sofia clapped her hands together in excitement. “He is such a keeper. Honestly, he is making all the other boys look bad” You could hardly contain your joy as you shoved the note securely into your bag. “I can’t believe he actually did this” Sofia laughed, pushing you towards the door and holding your jacket in the other. “I will manage alone here. Go, you have got a mystery to solve”

❄❄❄❄❄

You stepped out of the bookstore into the crisp, snow-kissed morning. The streets were still bustling with holiday shoppers, their arms full of bags, red and green scarves tight against the cold. You tugged your own scarf closer around the neck, the note Jisung had left still snug in your bag. You couldn’t stop smiling. A scavenger hunt. He really planned a scavenger hunt. Jisung wasn’t the flashy or over-the-top like the romantic leads in Christmas movies you loved so dearly, but he had his own charm and this? This was exactly the kind of thing that would melt your heart. Thoughtful and so personal. It already felt like the best Christmas you had ever had, and it hadn’t even arrived yet.

The Blissful Brews was just around the corner, nestled between an old record store and a boutique that sold handmade jewellery. In that old record store worked Jisung. There, you had crossed paths for the first time as you bought your favourite albums and accidentally ran into him. You still remembered how his coffee had drenched your blouse and his deep apologies. The Blissful Brews was the kind of coffee shop that locals loved – warm and small enough that you could find someone you knew sitting in the corner with a steaming mug. The windows were fogged over from the warmth inside and the soft music spilled out as you pushed through the door. Rich espresso mingled with the sweetness of cinnamon and sugar – one of your favourite smells in the world, second only to fresh books and old paper. You paused for a moment near the entrance to take it all in. Everything about this place reminded you of Jisung. The first time you really met (well, if you don’t consider the little accident) and you were so nervous. He had invited you to a coffee as an apology. At that time, you didn’t know that he soon will cross the line between friendship and love.

Now, standing in the familiar warmth of the café, you couldn’t help but laugh at the memory. They both had been incredibly nervous, and the first few minutes were awkward as you had ordered. But this issue was overcome pretty quickly, and you were engaged in a deep conversation for hours. “Can I help you?” the young barista asked, leaning on the counter and eyeing her with an amused expression. You turned to observe the man that had dyed his hair in an unusual pinkish colour. You greeted him, telling him that you searched for an envelope. Of course, he knew you. He was the one that took your orders. Raising his eyebrows, he smiled. “A scavenger hunt clue, maybe?” You blinked, surprised. “Jisung told you?” The barista smirked sheepishly. “He may have come in last night and left something for you. That boy is so sweet” He gestured towards the back of the shop. Of course, why didn’t you think about it earlier? It was obvious that Jisung would have hidden at your table – the small two-seater tucked near the huge window where you had sat on your first unofficial date.

Your boots clicked softly against the wooden floor as you made your way to it, the hum of conversation and the faint clatter of cups filling the air. Your heart did a little flip when you saw a piece of paper carefully taped to the back of one of the chairs. He really did plan this whole thing, you thought. The handwriting was unmistakably Jisung’s, looking like he had been scribbling quickly.

Clue Two: Remember the big storm where you got soaked? You laughed at me ‘til you nearly choked. Go where we took cover and found some cheer, You will find your next clue there.

You couldn’t help but laugh at that memory. It had been one of your earlier dates, back in late September. The weather had been cold but clear when you walked around the town. Jisung, as always, had insisted on walking you back home after the successful date – even though it was a good twenty-minute trip, and his own apartment was on the other side of the town. Halfway through, the first droplets of rain started to fall that had been signalized by the dark clouds and the stormy wind. Small and cold, the water absorbed by your thin jacket. “Oh no” you had muttered, looking up at the ominous grey clouds overhead. Jisung, always the optimist, had grinned. “Maybe it will just be a drizzle” he commented.

Well, it wasn’t. Within moments, the rain had come down in buckets, soaking both of you to the bone, clothes clinging to your wet skin. You remembered standing there in the middle of the street, your hair plastered to your face, water running down your jacket in rivulets. And Jisung stared at you helplessly like he was trying to think of something heroic to do. “Umbrella?” he had stammered. “Too late for that” you said, giggling while you brushed your hair out of your face. Jisung had looked at you like you were slightly insane but the smile permanent on his lips. He had tugged you to a small shop, taking shelter there. The quirky little clothing shop near your apartment where he had bought you a fluffy, deep blue hoodie with a funny picture on it to keep you warm. So far, it was one of your favourite hoodies, creating a great memento of your date.

Now standing in that same clothing store, the second clue clutched in your hand, you searched through the cozy, cluttered shop filled with all different kinds and seizes of clothes in multiple colours. The old shopkeeper, looked up with a knowing smile. The smile of the grey-haired lady was kind and warm. “Ah Y/n” she greeted you, folding new clothes and putting them away on of the racks. “Jisung mentioned you would be coming by” You blinked. “He told you about this?”

Her laughter spread the whole shop. “Of course. That lovesick boy spent nearly an hour here yesterday, making sure that everything was perfect” You followed her to the counter as she pulled out a big paper bag. As soon as you opened it, your gaze locked on a red hoodie, decorated with small white snowflakes. You chuckled at the parallel to your past date. On top sat another note.

Here, my love, is clue three: Our bench in the park, Where we shared our first kiss. A memory I hold, sweet and kind, Go back there now and you will find the next clue.

❄❄❄❄❄

As you stepped back out into the cold, the snowflakes drifting lazily from the sky, you couldn’t stop the giddy excitement bubbling inside you. Every little detail Jisung had included so far – the places, the memories, the clues – was so perfectly. Your boots crunched against the freshly fallen snow as you walked quickly towards the park. The streets were busier now, families wandering hand-in-hand, and the shop windows glowing warmly in the gathering dusk. You pulled your scarf tighter around your neck, your breath misting in the cold air. The park wasn’t far from the clothing shop and soon, you found yourself standing at the entrance, the large trees stood brave in the falling snow, their branches dusted with snow.

The benches – especially the one you were looking for – were a small island in the white. You scanned the park, looking for the familiar sight. There it was, your bench. The bench where Jisung finally made you, his girlfriend. It was tucked beneath an old oak tree, the powdery snow gathering slowly on the wooden slats. The tree’s branches stretched overhead, and you could almost hear your memories of your past visits. The easy conversations, the quiet moments where you had leaned your head against his shoulder. And then, the kiss happened and symbolised the beginning of your relationship. He had seemed so nervous, his gaze wandering over your face, from time to time locking on your lips, not sure if he was allowed to lean in and capture them. You didn’t act differently.

Honestly, he had won your heart over at your fist unofficial date. As you told him about your day, your own eyes travelled over his soft, pillowy lips, imagining how it would be to kiss him. Eventually, he took all his courage and pressed his lips firmly on yours. Before you could even react, your mind still trying to understand what happened, he retracted. As he brushed through his hair in panic, stuttering apologies, you shook yourself out of your trance and grabbed the collar of his jacket. Swiftly, you pulled him towards you again, his voice was overflowing while you silenced him skilfully. This time, you lead the kiss and quickly, he recovered from the shock and reciprocated the tender gesture.

You reached the bench, smiling to yourself as you saw the small package, wrapped simply in brown paper and a beautiful red bow. Bending down, you brushed the thin layer of snow from the package and untied the bow as well as the paper. A big mug caught your eye, pulling it out from underneath the carefully wrapped papers to ensure that it won’t break.

You turned it to inspect the motif, heart fluttering in your chest as soon as your gaze fell on the photo printed on it. It wasn’t just any photo, no, it showed you two, his cheeks squished against yours tightly. You took it right here on the bench a few weeks prior on a date. Both of your smiles were bright, eyes sparkling with joy and adoration. Your chest tightened, touched by the thoughtful gesture as you pulled the mug close to your heart. This would be your favourite mug from now on. Inside, folded carefully, was the next clue. You pulled it out with a mixture of excitement and curiosity, unfolding it gently as if it were something fragile. Jisung’s handwriting filled the page.

Clue Four: It’s time for the final stop on our trip, Come warm up your hand and take a sip, Come Home where the heart will be, Find me, my love, and you will see.

Your heart leapt. Home. It was a simple word, but it meant so much to you. Your home had always been your apartment – your cozy little space filled with tons of books where you had lived since you moved into this town. But with Jisung, it had started to feel like more than just an apartment. As the weather was colder and rainy, you had spent much time there together, arguing over which Christmas movie to watch, cooking dinner side by side and wrapping presents for family and friends.

Slowly, over the last few months, it had become a place where you could imagine a future, a future with him. With this scavenger hunt, he wasn’t trying to be someone he wasn’t. He wasn’t flashy and didn’t plan some over-the-top romantic gesture straight out of a movie. What he had done was so much better – he had paid attention to the small, quiet moments you had shared. The memories that felt uniquely yours.

You read the note again, realizing what the clue actually meant. Jisung was waiting for you. “Home” you murmured to yourself, your breath fogging in the cold air. You felt a flutter of anticipation deep in your chest as you made your way back down the snowy path toward the street, eager to reach your apartment, to see what Jisung had planned next. The walk was quick, but it felt like an eternity. Each step seemed to pull your closer to something that had always been just out of reach – a feeling of belonging. With Jisung.

❄❄❄❄❄

When you reached your apartment building, it felt like the final puzzle piece was clicking into place. The familiar steps that led to the entrance, the little lobby with its mismatched furniture and the clattering sounds of neighbours going about their daily routines – all of it was comforting. It was home. Now, there was the promise of something even more special waiting inside. You climbed the stairs to the floor, your boots clicking softly on the old wooden steps. The snow outside created a thin layer of frost now thick enough to blanket everything in white. But inside, the warmth from her apartment was waiting – just like Jisung. When you reached the door, something was different.

The dim hallway light flickered above your head, casting soft shadows on the walls. But what really caught her attention was the way the hallway smelled. It wasn’t the usual scent of fresh air or coffee from the neighbours down the hall. This time, there was something warmer, sweeter in the air. Curious, you approached your door and paused, your hand resting lightly on the doorknob. The faintest glow of light slipped through the crack beneath the door, casting a soft, inviting warmth into the otherwise dark hallway.

You opened the door slowly, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips as you stepped inside, observing your apartment in search of Jisung. There, in the middle of the living room, was the most unexpected sight – a blanket fort. An actual blanket fort. You stood frozen for a moment, unsure whether to laugh or cry at how utterly this was. Soft blankets and throws were draped over every available surface, creating a small cozy cocoon in the centre of your living room. Christmas lights twinkled across the top, casting a soft glow. There were pillows scattered everywhere, some piled high inside the fort, others lining the floor like a cushiony path. It was like a childhood dream, but somehow even better – because this time, you had Jisung.

The small Christmas tree you two had bought together last week (well, he helped you with finding the perfect one since you couldn’t decide which one to get and brought it to your apartment since the tree was too heavy for you to lift). Despite your bickering that he should let you help at least with holding it up too, he wanted to do it alone, claiming that it was his job as your boyfriend. You had decorated the Christmas tree together, in the background played your favourite playlist to which you both sang loudly, hanging the handmade ornaments and paper snowflakes on the twigs.

Your heart swelled with pride as you took it all in, trying to figure out how you could get so lucky to have such a thoughtful boyfriend. And then, you heard him in the kitchen, he seemed to be preparing something but as he realised you were home, he stalked into the living area. Two steaming mugs in his hand, your favourites you recognised, His eyes displayed fondness when he observed you, smiling brightly.

“Hey, my love” he greeted you, placing the mugs onto the small couch table before turning to you again. You stepped closer, your feet light on the carpet as you walked towards him, his smile got playful. Hands on your hips, you tried to suppress the grin threatening to spread across your face. “So, this is the big finale? A blanket fort? You had me running all over town for this?” A mischievous smile appeared on his lips. “Hey now, this is a masterpiece. I spent hour building and rebuilding it until we both can fit inside. It’s the crown jewel of the scavenger hunt” he exclaimed, fully convinced with his grand idea. You raised your eyebrows, judging his so-called masterpiece. You must say that he did a really good job at building it.

“I must admit, it looks nice” you told him your decision, smiling fondly. “Did you plan all of this?” He nodded proudly, pulling you inside and placed a mug into your hands. As you analysed it further, you realised it was a hot chocolate topped with whipped cream, marshmallows and colourful sprinkles. Just how you liked it. The interior of the fort was cozy and intimate, pillows scattered across the floor, and the twinkling lights above gave the space a dreamy glow. You let out a breath you didn’t knew you were holding. “This is … incredible. This whole journey was wonderful.” you whispered. Jisung shifted, his comfortable scent wafting surrounded you, he smelled like home – your home.

“No need to thank me. Even though we are only four months into our relationship, I wanted to do something special. Because in this short time, my life has changed drastically. You became the centre of my life, my love.” he explained, pulling your hand into his, heating your cold fingers as he caressed the skin lightly. His gaze was soft, full of love when he continued.

“And I wanted you to feel how much everything I experienced with you means to me, every single memory we made together. How much you mean to me” You looked at him, your eyes shining while the weight of his words sank in. “I noticed” you stated quietly. “The café where we had our ‘unofficial’ date. The clothing store when we were surprised by the sudden rain. The bench where we shared so many memories, our first kiss included. You didn’t just send me running around town, Ji. You sent me through us”. Your boyfriend leaned back on his elbows, his gaze softening.

“That was the idea” he admitted. “Sometimes we get caught up in the present, in everything happening around us. And I just wanted to take you back – to remind us of all the moments that brought us here”. Your other hand traced the edge of one of the blankets as you took a deep breath, your voice trembling slightly. “It worked. Every step of the way, I felt it – how much thought, how much love you put into this. I’ve never had anything like this before, Jisung. It’s overwhelming, in the best way” The tears you fought to keep in, slowly escaped and rolled over your cheeks as you sobbed because of how much you adored this man next to you and the weight of not only his words but also his actions.

He cooed at you fondly, cupping your face with his hands, brushing the tears away while placing a sweet peck on your forehead. “Don’t cry. You know I can’t stand it when you cry” Soothingly he rocked you, humming to help you calm down. You smiled at him, puffy eyes but you promised that this were happy tears. “This” you said finally “is more than I ever could ask for” You leaned into him, resting your head against Jisung’s shoulder.

“I know that it’s not Christmas Day. But I have another gift for you” he stated, reaching into his hoodie pocket and pulling out a small, wrapped package. “I thought the fort was the grand finale?” You asked, narrowing your eyes suspiciously. He placed it gracefully into your open palm, his expression playful but tinges with something deeper. “You could describe it as an addition. Go on, open it”

You tore into the wrapping carefully, your fingers grazing the brown paper and the simple red ribbon. Inside was a small wooden box, its surface smooth and polished. Your breath caught as you opened it, revealing an assortment of trinkets nestled inside. There was a ticket stub from your first movie date, the corner slightly torn where he had fidgeted with it nervously. A pressed leave from the time you had from the time you spent in the park with a picnic as the weather wasn’t that bad, even for autumn. Several other things from past dates were laying in the box. The memories flooded back in vivid detail. “You kept all of this?” your voice broke again as tears welled up. He chuckled, his gaze steady. “Of course. I wanted to remember it all – the moments that made me realize how much you mean to me”

You swallowed hard, fighting the lump in your throat that made it difficult to speak. “I don’t even know what to say. This … This is the most thoughtful thing anyone’s ever done for me”. He smiled widely, pecking your forehead once again. “Thank you so much, Ji” “I’m glad, because you mean the world to me, Y/n. And I think there’s one more thing we’re missing to make this moment perfect” He brushed a hair strand out of your face, his touch lingering for a memory before his gaze dropped to your lips. “What’s that?” You smiled widely, already knowing what he is up to. After four months, you had figured out what he meant with that but you tagged along.

“This” The fondness in his eyes made your heart stutter and you couldn’t help but lean closer to him, capturing his lips with your own in a passionate kiss. His lips were soft, pillowy even, and you could even taste the chocolate from the hot chocolate that he had sipped on before. The kiss was filled with promises that only love could carry, the rest of the world melting away, leaving only the two of you and the quiet certainty that this was exactly where you were meant to be. When you finally pulled apart, you rested your forehead against Jisung’s, your eyes shining with joy while your boyfriend tightened his arms around you in a protective manner.

Comfortably, you leaned back and cuddled further into his embrace and the blankets that were like a fuzzy cocoon, enveloping you in warmth. You wouldn’t want to be anywhere else for the rest of your life. “We have got so much more to add to this box”.

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cinnamonest · 10 months ago

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not too sure if you've already put thought into it, but which yanderes would be/wouldn't be willing to break bones? i feel like for most of them it's a hard yes but depending on the circumstances and their mental fragility.

also sadisim. (COUGHCOUGHCHILDECOUGHCOUGH)

ignore this ask if you've already answered/have a question similar to this (or just don't want to answer/! and if your reqs are closed and my tumblrs just tweaking that's okay too!!

I would say Albedo initially, but he's a practical man, if you're not going to be using the limbs anyway might as well just take them off, so… as for some others…

Kazuha does it for practicality, specifically your ankles. It's a useful risk prevention method.

He still feels bad, and he apologizes… but he doesn't hesitate much. After all, he did give you fair warning, but you ran off yet again. This is just to keep you safe, for your own well-being, and for his peace of mind.

He's sweet about it too. He puts your hand against his arm beforehand, and tells you here, you can squeeze down on my arm, okay? After all, it will help with the initial pain.

He's still sweet when you squirm away and whimper, even though the grip with which he pulls you back is harsh.

I know. But I can't let you be a danger to yourself…

He holds you gently for however long it takes you to stop crying. He'll get you water and food and painkillers/alcohol, tends to your every need, waits on you hand and (broken) foot. Notably, once the initial reaction has died down, he stops really acknowledging it in any meaningful way, talks to you as if everything is normal. Even when addressing your leg, he talks about it as if it were some injury you acquired by other means.

You might be spiteful enough to bring it up and remind him that it's his fault, but he's quick to correct you, keeping a soft voice and gentle smile all the while.

You did have every opportunity to choose otherwise, you know. Ah, but I know you're upset… it's okay if you blame me.

He'll be fully patient for you to heal, too. He’s very cheerful once it's fully healed, says he's glad you're better, helps you walk around a bit to get readjusted, keeping his hands firmly supporting you the entire time. Even for a while after it's healed enough to walk, he checks on it from time to time to ensure the final stages of mending are going well.

He tells you you're fully healed, with a soft voice and ever-pleasant smile, not without adding—

Let’s hope it stays that way.

----

Childe has to be in a more angry mood than usual to get to that point. Usually, his form of sadism is the sort that focuses on a sort of pleasure-pain, the sort he can get off to… but this is a bit different.

It's only because you keep being irritating. He's really tolerant, you know? He's been so lenient, he tells you, he's been so nice, he's been so good to you, and what do you do? You keep being mean. It's cute up to a certain point, but you're being like, really really mean.

It's actually kind of nice, on his end, to see your immediate reaction — you can tell just by the strained smile and clenched teeth as he speaks that you've crossed some sort of line. For once, you actually shrink back, clutch your hands up at your chest defensively, start to take some steps back… but you can't get away fast enough before you're drug forward by the hair or neck.

Come on… it's not that hard to be good, is it?

It's a last chance — he's nice enough to give you that, at least, even if you don't deserve it (which you don't, he thinks). Come on. You can be good, you can apologize and submit and he'll forget all the spiteful shit you've done today and then you can have a nice, happy rest of the day. You can do it. It should be easy. He takes one of your hands in his, holding it with a sort of sincere pleading gesture.

But, even though you should know better, you still remain spiteful through your fear, narrow your eyes and tell him no. You try to jerk your hand away, only to find his grip on it is iron-firm.

His smile twitches.

Aw. That's too bad.

And thus, you process the sound and sight before the pain — you see him take your hand and twist it, hear the snap, and only then does the pain shoot up through your wrist, through your arm and to every nerve in your body. It's bad enough that you fall to your knees, squealing, cradling the now-unnaturally-twisted limb.

Yes, he's very very nice, but admittedly, hearing you wail like that is rather pleasing, all things considered. More so when he grabs you by the jaw, jerks your head up to force you to look at him, and sees the tears in your eyes, the way your face contorts with pain.

Maybe you can be good now…?

This time, you squeeze your eyes shut, frantically nodding your head, a pitiful little sound coming out of your throat. He'd be lying if he said it wasn't very satisfying.

---

There's also a notable difference between willing to break bones and likelihood of breaking bones, actively willing or not.

Some non-humans are particularly unaware of their strength — Xiao fits this well. He genuinely doesn't like hurting you, although you would think so, based on how much he does, it's just that he forgets how fragile you are. For someone of his strength, your body might as well be made of glass.

So it just sort of happens… he grabs you by the arm or leg and pulls in the wrong direction a bit too hard, there's a stomach-churning snapping sound and suddenly you're shrieking and crying. It startles him quite a bit — he lets go and shrinks back, all wide-eyed and head darting from side to side as he looks around in confused panic.

But just as with fragility, he's also not very aware of the durability of the human body. He’s not great at gauging severity of injury — normally, he just attacks creatures until they stop moving, because that's his goal when it comes to his responsibilities.

So he has no real reference for how much damage he's done. Bones are all connected, yes? He probably broke something important, or made some internal organ come apart somehow, and it will kill you. The thought sends him into a full-fledged panic, he's bolting off and dragging help back as fast as physically possible, explaining that you have sustained mortal injury and are on the verge of death.

He's at least comforted to learn that that is in fact not the case, and you have merely broken your arm, which, the innkeeper confirms, is in fact not fatal. He's too relieved to notice the blatant frustration in her voice (this marks the fourth time he's insisted you are about to die over something actually far more trivial), and merely nods when she asks to please be more careful.

He doesn't really know how to handle the matter from there. He feels guilty about it. You're obviously in pain, and it's his fault. He'll sit next to you, hunched over and staring with those big yellow eyes as if trying to make you heal faster with sheer willpower. Makes sure you don't get up and move around (despite your insistence that your legs are just fine — still can't take risks, he says), disappears for a while each day and comes back with mountaintop herbs that are supposed to dull pain.

He doesn't outright say sorry, but you can see the remorse on his face and in his actions, and it's actually kind of pitiful… it reminds you of a little kid that broke a vase sheepishly trying to put it back together… all in all, you can't really bring yourself to be harsh about it.

#.kz #.x #.ch

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bnxxshthealien · 7 months ago

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something’s wrong with UNIT

ok, something’s really bugging me about the new version of UNIT (in doctor who season 1/14)

In their first few appearances in nuwho (in rtd1) the Doctor was very clearly cautious of or completely against unit (e.g. in the sontaran stratagem, it felt like he had to fight unit more than the sontarans). Which absolutely makes sense: their military methods go completely against the Doctor’s typical behaviour.

And then Kate Lethbridge-Stewart came into it. In her first season (s7), she tried to murder a group of refugee zygons. The Doctor tried to interfere, which resulted in a kind of botched partition. This predictably collapsed in s9, and Kate addressed the situation by attempting genocide. And the Doctor was rightfully pissed.

Since then we haven’t seen much of Kate, other than Flux / Power of the Doctor, in which she has zero meaningful characterisation. (i don’t wanna hate on s13, i do like it, but there’s not really anything interesting to say here)

Then there was the Giggle, which I think did a good job: we got to see a kind of raw version of Kate, which showed a contrast between the dangerous side of her and the way she presents herself, which suggests that she has listened to the Doctor and worked on herself.

But then we have the Legend of Ruby Sunday. The Doctor just walks into unit like they never did anything wrong and fully supports everything they try to do. I mean, it’s nice, it’s fun to watch all the characters get along, but aren’t there some things you need to address??

anyway. i’m hoping this is intentional. 15 is getting a bit too carefree after the bigeneration (he keeps stepping on things etc.) and I suspect the sudden switch in attitude towards unit is RTD’s way of showing how this can be a problem. I suspect in Empire of Death, unit are going to make a bad move and the Doctor will remember why he used to be cautious of them.

#doctor who #dw s14 #rtd2 #15th doctor #dw theory #ruby sunday #unit #kate lethbridge stewart #kate stewart #bigeneration #ncuti gatwa #empire of death

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i-heart-hxh · 6 months ago

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I just want to say I appreciate you for staying positive about killugon. Admittedly, I’ve given up on them. Maybe it’s too many angsty fanfics or metas I’ve seen that basically make it seem like they’ll never be close again but it’s nice to see some people still going strong with this ship! Hopefully one day I can enjoy this ship again the way I used to. Currently everything I read about them in fandom just depresses me.

Hi anon!

I'm sad to hear the negativity has gotten to you to this degree! It actually surprises me how much the fandom seems to think what happened between them can't be fixed. I've been into HxH for almost 8 years now and as time has gone on and I've revisited the series and analyzed it deeply and discussed it with others, I've only grown more certain that things between them will be okay--assuming Togashi can reach that point in the series. And right now is a great time to be hopeful about the future of HxH, with Togashi working so actively on the series the past few months.

Sooo many of the messages in my inbox amount to "Is there really hope? Are Gon and Killua really going to reunite and reconcile? Or is their relationship hopelessly broken?" so even though I feel like a bit of a broken record addressing this topic so much, it seems like it's a topic people really want addressed, so here's some more of my thoughts. (Trying to make my answers on this topic at least a little different each time even if some repetition is inevitable...!)

Here's this post I made of some of the reasons I anticipate a Gon and Killua reunion and fixing their relationship. And here's this eye-opening analysis post of the separation, yet again, which also offers hope.

So much of HxH is about second chances. It's about how love and human connections transform people and make life worth living, no matter how painful and difficult it may be. At the end of Chimera Ant Arc, Meruem and Komugi (who are, by the way, absolutely parallels for Gon and Killua) find their meaning for living in each other, and decide to stay together even knowing the only way they can be together is in the afterlife. If you trace back this scene to all the factors and character moments that made it possible, it goes all the way back to Gon extending kindness to Killua and changing his life. I believe Gon and Killua are on a path wherein they will ultimately find their meaning in each other and vow to stay together again (albeit without the dying part).

Gon and Killua are the protagonists of the series, and they are emblematic of the themes of HxH. Looking at the themes of HxH and the worldview it presents, it doesn't make sense for Gon and Killua to experience this horrible traumatic incident as the young teens they are, then never ever get to fix and resolve it even though they're both clearly upset to have to leave each other and they definitely have more to say to each other. Why show them feeling dissatisfied and unhappy to separate if they'll never get a chance to fix things and be happy together again? Do you really think that's the direction Togashi wants to go in, with the focus of the series and the repeated emphasis on how the hope we can find in a cruel, painful world rests in the connections we have with the people around us?

It's meaningful that they make each other so happy and transformed each others' lives. It's meaningful that even now in merch and artwork and such, they're portrayed as a pair. It's meaningful that a huge chunk of the audience so desperately wants to see them together again, and I'm certain Togashi is well aware of that. These two are at the heart of what makes HxH so wonderful and moving.

It's okay to take a break from the ship if it's not bringing you joy. Sometimes I get frustrated by takes and interpretations I see about it, too, trust me. Ultimately, it's here for you whenever you want to revisit it, and there are plenty of fanworks with happy endings and reconciliation between them if you need something to tide you over until canon hopefully resolves things between them. But do what feels right for yourself--it's okay to focus on something fluffier and less complex if that's what you need for now. I hope eventually you can come to see it with more hope, as I have lots of hope for their future--and I don't think it's unwarranted at all. 💖

#hxh #hunter x hunter #gon #killua #killugon #gonkillu #asks #my posts #anonymous

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aventurineswife · 1 month ago

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HI HI! I hope you are having a good day/night 💞

I wanted to know your opinion on this:

Like, i been seen a lot of people saying that he should go to therapy, or even go to couple therapy with him. But, since everyobody doesn't want to go to therapy, or when they go, they don't feel still right, or even can get worse. I think he would find another way to heal, one that truly makes him feel safe and comfortable.(SORRY I CAN SEE AVEN IN THERAPY FOR THE MOMENT.)

In my experience, i meet a lot of people that feels more comfortable telling problems to family, friends, or find comfort in some hyperfixation, or be on their own worlds. IDK WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THIS.

We love you Aven's wife. If you can, please, don't dissappear and became dust.

In my opinion, I think it's entirely valid to think that Aventurine wouldn't find traditional therapy appealing, at least not immediately. His character is deeply rooted in self-reliance and distrust, shaped by a lifetime of betrayal and survival through his own cunning. Therapy, which requires vulnerability and trust, might feel like too much of a gamble for someone like him. Instead, his path to healing could align with the following methods:

Aventurine might find solace in close, meaningful relationships with people who slowly earn his trust. Sharing his burdens with someone who understands his complexities—like a friend or a partner—could serve as his version of therapy. These connections might help him confront his trauma without feeling exposed or judged.

Aventurine's love for gambling and strategizing could act as a coping mechanism and, eventually, a tool for healing. For instance, he might channel his need for control and calculation into something constructive, like designing elaborate strategies to help others, which also gives him a sense of purpose.

Aventurine may benefit from moments of isolation where he can process his emotions without external pressures. He might find clarity in journaling, planning, or even something symbolic, like playing solitary games of chance to reflect on his decisions and fears.

Aventurine thrives in situations where he feels in control, so his healing journey could involve taking action to help others or dismantle systems of cruelty. By addressing the larger injustices that mirror his own trauma, he could begin to reconcile with his past.

Aventurine might find joy and comfort in lavishing his partner with gifts, experiences, or acts of service, using his flair to express love and distract himself from his inner struggles. This could be his therapeutic way of coping—showing care outwardly to feel a sense of connection and purpose.

However, if his partner refuses these gestures or encourages him to focus on his own healing, it might force him to confront his avoidance tactics. Over time, this could lead Aventurine to realize that true healing requires addressing his own pain rather than masking it with grand displays.

And that's pretty much it, I hope this explains it well. Remember this is my opinion but I'd love to see others opinions on it too🤗💖

Also, I'll try not to become one bite from the dust 🕴️ and love you guys too!! 🤗🫂💖🥺

#x reader #honkai star rail #hsr #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #hsr aventurine #aventurine x reader #hsr aventurine x reader #aventurine x you

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brattylikestoeat · 11 months ago

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Outside of 3 states, women own more homes than men. I read the article and the article says single women, women who haven’t been married.

So why I read the comments and all the men are crying divorce. “She got the home in the divorce!!!”

So they didn’t read the article, but I don’t expect men to.

But let’s address. If the home is in both names, she doesn’t just automatically get the house.

If the married couple has kids, the male is more likely to move out. Why? Because no one wants to uproot their kids from the everyday normal, a divorce is hard enough but imagine kicking your kids out too.

So the male leaves, wife and kids stay at home. When the divorce finalizes, they have two options with the home.

Sell the home and split the profit or give asset over to one party.

But a lot of things come into play and a judge will never give the woman the home just because she is a woman. So to assume a woman owns a home because she divorced someone is crazy.

It’s part of the male delusion that is driving men crazy these days. They assume we all do onlyfans when in reality women have higher paying jobs and make more money than ever.

They assume we all are fucking 50 men a night, when in reality most women are single as hell and want to stay that way. And this part is crazy to me, since men won’t shut up about the male loneliness epidemic.

I don’t think gender wars are going to ever get better for the simple fact that most men refuse to evolve. The days of you just getting a woman because you are a “good guy” with a job are long gone. It takes a lot more to bag most women these days. A lot of men are not kind, very mean spirited, don’t want to offer anything but dick and problems.

Why would a woman sign up for that? She makes good money on her own, have meaningful relationships, a community of friends.

Men tell women we are undateable but complain they are lonely. You’ve deemed more than 75% of the women population not worthy of being with. Women with degrees, women who travel, women who own homes, women with kids, women with more than 2 sexual partners, women with social media, women with male friends, women with pets. I could go on, but redpill has said all these women are undateable.

You deserve to be lonely, and I hope your bros keep you warm at night.

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eroguron0nsense · 9 months ago

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Doflamingo, Love, and Arrested Development

This is mostly just me paraphrasing other Doffy metas and comments I've made but I kinda feel like the real tragedy behind Doflamingo's warped psychology kind of gets missed by people who focus more on his trauma in and of itself and get lost in discourses about having sympathy for characters despite their complete lack of morality and disregard for everyone (perfectly possible), or whether Doflamingo has any redeeming characteristics or genuine concern for anyone or anything outside of himself (he doesn't).

Doffy's story is fundamentally a tragedy, but not because of his childhood traumas or how drastic and painful they are; plenty of One Piece characters experience severe abuses or incomprehensible loss, but they're ultimately stories of how to find hope in the face of the incomprehensibly traumatic, or the salvation/redemptive power of love. Even characters who don't necessarily see their goals fulfilled (see Fisher Tiger, Pedro, Ashura Doji, EGGHEAD SPOILERS etc) aren't fundamentally tragic ones in the way that, say, Ace is, in that they die having fulfilled their goals to the best of their ability and knowing that people will carry on where they left off, even if they don't get to see the liberation they hoped for. Rosinante's story isn't a tragedy because he dies satisfied that he's given hope to someone he loves deeply (and to some extent tried to make amends for some of the guilt he clearly feels for participating in an institution that ruined that child's life).

Doffy, on the other hand, is a never-ending downward spiral from day 1. He was indoctrinated by evil people from birth and never has it addressed (his parents, for all their talk about living more simply than the Celestial Dragons, NEVER actually say "slavery is bad" to Doffy when he asks them why they don't own people any more and I have my own theory on why), who then suffers unbelievable trauma and has his sense of loss–both of his "birthright" and his innocence/ childhood–weaponized for evil. And he spends the rest of his life in this semi-permanent state of arrested development and violent entitlement. He can't have the station and privilege of the Celestial Dragons to... own slaves and live in luxury, so he builds a kingdom where HE reigns supreme and everyone who crosses him is killed or enslaved as a toy. His mother dies and he kills his father, so he assembles a cult-like "family" to try and compensate for the one he's lost/destroyed, but he doesn't and likely doesn't know how to love them in any meaningful way beyond being possessive of them and seeing them as extensions of himself (e.g. he's willing to kill anyone who makes fun of Pica because no one's allowed to antagonize his "family", but he also orders Monet to do a suicide bombing in Punk Hazard, and he's willing to sacrifice one of them for the eternal life surgery, etc). I think that might be why, even though he should know Corazon has every reason to hate and fear him, he's still so eager to take his brother in when they reunite as adults–he shouldn't trust him, and he eventually comes to suspect him of treason, but he's desperate to have a family and Corazon is emblematic of something he wants but can never have because he's a cruel stunted person who knows nothing but entitlement and violence and cannot process the idea that anything has value or merits selflessness and sacrifice.

Everything Doflamingo does is defined by trying to replace or compensate for the family and privilege he was "supposed" to have, but he doesn't love anyone or even understand how real love works because he's been taught to have no regard for human life and all he knows is that love = absolute servitude, that his interests are ultimately more important than the wellbeing of his "family" members, and that betrayal means death. And far be it from me to sympathize with a fallen aristocrat's deranged revenge power fantasies, but it does demonstrate how oppressive institutions inevitably deprive their own beneficiaries of some of their humanity, and consequently fuck them for life. Doffy craves genuine affection and has had his capacity for it permanently stunted by his former class station and indoctrination.

This craving for love combined with an inability to actually feel it in any meaningful way factors into why he's so obsessed with Law, who he kept hardcore projecting onto in the flashbacks and who he expected to turn out just like him. His brother chose Law over Doflamingo and even his undercover mission out of love, and for all his traumas and hangups, Law can find his own crew and friends who he cares about, and he's able to live on and find meaning even after losing EVERYTHING because Corazon genuinely loved him enough to die protecting him. Doffy, on the other hand, is doomed to a loveless, misanthropic, cruel existence where he tortures countless people to compensate, but he can't replace what he's lost and he'll never find it. It's not what Corazon would have wanted, but Law fighting for and honouring Corazon's memory in everything he does enrages Doffy, who will never be able to understand why they cared for each other so deeply, and why both of them are integral to his downfall.

#one piece #trafalgar law #straw hat pirates #donquixote doflamingo #donquixote rosinante #corazon #one piece meta #dressrossa

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everythingannoyingpjo · 4 months ago

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Caleo actually drives me crazy bc Calypso was so mean to Leo all the time for no reason and it drives me crazyyyyy

This isn’t even MENTIONING the age gap

Thank you for the ask anon. I hope it won't bother you, but I'm going to break up your complaint a bit in order to talk about the intent of this blog.

Caleo actually drives me crazy...

Your ask starts with an opinion. The opinion is about a canon ship. This is good because we are here to complain about canon.

bc Calypso was so mean to Leo all the time for no reason.

You then explain what about the canon ship bugs you. Also good! But it would have been better if you included examples from the text.

What did Calypso do that was mean?

Pulling from the text to support your statement will lead to a more meaningful discussion.

This isn't even MENTIONING the age gap.

You provide a secondary reason for your dislike, which is great. Furthermore this one requires no explanation. The reasons for a prominent age gap making you uncomfortable are obvious and don't need to be stated.

HOWEVER, you could have also used this as an opportunity to complain about how Rick wrote Calypso.

(I'm not suggesting you complain about something that doesn't bother you, rather giving an example of other things it would have been reasonable to include so people can see the types of complaints this blog is most looking for.)

Why did Rick feel the age gap was unimportant to address? Why is Calypso written as a teenager despite her age and experience?

Rick picks and chooses what he uses from greater Greek mythology, but here he doesn't even explain WHAT he is choosing to include about Calypso's past. We don't know anything about her, we practically have to rely on the mythology to get a sense of her character and yet the way she is written by Rick and by ancient sources doesn't line up.

She is most definitely written as an adult in the Odyssey. That's not the case here, so you could argue that Rick intends her to be functionally the same as a teenager, but why is that? Has she been trapped in her adolescence just as she was trapped on Ogygia? We don't know!

It's actually reasonable none of the other teenagers question her relationship with Leo as it's written, because they have no reason to assume she is any more mature than they are. She looks and acts their age and as far as we know she cannot transform or alter her appearance as the gods can. But it's weird and unrealistic that it's never addressed.

Furthermore in ToA she is excited to go to highschool and be a "normal teenager," but why? Is she really nothing more than a teenager frozen in time yearning for a typical adolescent experience? Or is she an old lady wanting to pretend at being a child? We're never really given an explanation and that's just dumb.

So yeah, I agree with you on their relationship being complaint worthy. It really doesn't make sense, but ideally you want to focus more on the reason the complaint exists and not just on the source of the complaint.

#pjo critical #toa critical #pjo #hoo #toa #pjo hoo toa #percy jackon and the olympians #heroes of olympus #trials of apollo #hoo critical #calypso pjo #leo valdez #anti caleo #everything annoying #initial response

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hiskillingjar · 3 months ago

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CBT (Lawrence/OC)

the truth comes out. i, ray hiskillingjar, love to abuse genitals. send tweet.

day 7: CBT second person. law x oc. cw for fauxcest and very brief misgendering kink (maybe) but quickly gets addressed.

"Are you sure you want me to do this?"

Your voice was a low murmur in the heavy silence of the apartment, your dark brows knitted together with a slight frown, your lip sucked between your crooked teeth as you stared down at Lawrence, kneeling at your feet.

"It's gonna hurt...like, really bad.”

Lawrence looked up at you, their light grey eyes wide (and a little more alive than you’re used to) with a mixture of fear and excitement, and something else entirely you couldn't put words to.

"Yeah, I know…” They said with a hesitant nod, eyes flitting down to their bare chest, their naked body, as if stripped down and ready to sacrifice. “But it'll help too, right?"

"Help with what?" You asked, a disbelieving chuckle in your voice. "You think torturing yourself is gonna feel any better than just hating yourself?"

"No, it’s not about that,” They shook their head, still looking up at you, almost pleading for you to understand something they couldn't find the words to articulate. “It's...not about hating myself, not really. It's...it's more than that. More meaningful. Grounding, reminding myself of…what belongs to me.”

Their bare thighs spread apart slightly wider, their cock hardening between them as they continued to plead for your understanding.

“You know what I mean?”

Understanding that you would always readily give them.

"Yeah...yeah, I know," You said, the tight chastity cage under your skirt feeling a little tighter, giving them a sympathetic smile. "I know, Law. I'm sorry, I'm just...needing to psyche myself up a little."

Lawrence nodded, also understanding (because they always did, too).

Deep down, maybe a small part of them was enjoying this, enjoying your slight discomfort at their brutal request, as if testing your loyalty to them.

You got that sense when their eyes flitted downwards, their gaze lingering on the place between your legs for just the briefest of moments (trying their best not to let the smug, knowing smile, that always came with this sort of experience, play on their lips too much) before settling back on your face.

"You can do it. I know you can."

They pulled a deep breath inwards and then took hold of your hands, clinging onto them tightly, encouraging, waiting.

“I trust you.”

You smiled and shook your head in disbelief (not believing what you were about to do), letting out a soft sigh through your nose as you dragged your thumbs over their bony knuckles, holding them tight.

"Thanks, baby." You nodded. "Thank you for trusting me...it means a lot."

Lawrence couldn't help but let out a soft whine at the obvious term of endearment, which they swallowed back quickly, keeping it at the back of their throat where it wouldn't be so obvious (where they wouldn’t be so vulnerable).

They held your hands tighter, and your smile morphed into a smirk.

"Beg for it." You ordered gently, your tone soft and sweet and sickeningly maternal.

“Pl-please…” They mumbled with a pleased shudder, idly biting their lower lip as they closed their eyes, waiting. "Do it. I can...I can take it, I promise."

You took in a final sigh through your grit teeth, stroking over their white knuckles one last time...before you brought your foot down firmly between their legs, grinding the heel of your Mary Jane shoe down against the slightly soft, slightly hard length of their cock.

Their breath hitched instantly and a ruined gasp tore its way from their throat as their body lurched forward, their hands clinging to yours even harder.

Despite their eyes still being closed, tears began to well up beneath their pale eyelashes.

A few tears of joy, you thought (you hoped), but probably mainly tears of pain,

"You like that?" You murmured, your voice pitched up through a slight sneer (playing the cis girl domme you always saw in porn), letting go of one of their hands to reach up and curl a fist into their hair, pulling their head down against your thigh, against the hem of your skirt. "That feel good?"

“Nnghh…yes. Yes, it feels good." They let out a low groan (deep, so lovely, you loved their natural voice so much), gripping your free hand even tighter. "F-Feels really good, hurts so good...”

A small spot of precum was beading out their slit against the apartment’s floorboards (against the sole of your shoe) and you found yourself smirking even more.

"Oh yeah? You like it when I step on your dumb, fucking cock?" You pulled their hair a little harder, your fist at the base of their skull. "It's so big, Law, so big and useless and stupid," A mean grin came to your face as you pressed more weight against it, listening to them moan in pain. "You can't even get hard most of the time~"

“Nnfhgh…”

Their legs trembled, their face blushing a deep shade of red as tears finally began to fall from beneath their closed eyes. They tried to speak, tried to find the words to answer you, but struggled to find anything to say.

"What..." You let out a little sigh, trembling a little when you saw the first tear fall from their jaw and down their chest. You were used to tears, but- "What kind of girl has this, hm? What kind of girl has a big, useless cock like you do?"

They squeezed their eyes tighter, now starting to sniffle as they tried to fight through the mixture of shame, pain, and pleasure surely swirling through them.

It was certainly swirling through you, anyway.

"N-no girls do..." They stammered quietly, still clinging to you. "Just me, just me…"

"You don't think so?" You raised a sceptical brow and tightened your grip on their hair. "What about me? Is my cock small enough to be a real girl?"

"N-no, no. Yes. I-I mean...nhh..." They bit their lip and their voice trembled as you tightened your grip on their hair, surely pulling out strands of the coarse blonde now, it was so tight.

The probable pain (from your hand and under your shoe) was now starting to pull the first stream of tears from their clenched lids, clinging to their lashes and swelling into fat teardrops before falling down their face, their chest, their thighs.

"You're perfect...you're definitely a real girl, a real woman..." They breathed out, their head sinking down against your thigh and their body squirming to be free. "I'm just...I'm just a sick freak. Not...real..."

Your heart lept at that, your brain on high alert that this was going too far, this was too much, this was too close to home to be fun anymore, but you swallowed down the urge to safeword out of the "scene" (not like the two of you abided by language like that, you weren’t total dorks).

They were enjoying this.

You knew that much from the way their cock was drooling under the sole of your shoe, and the way they were keening against you, despite their trembles.

But you weren't. At least, you weren't enjoying the degrading way they were speaking about themself.

But you could change that. You were leading things, after all.

"Oh, Law..." You clicked your tongue with soft, sychophantic sympathy, taking off a little (but not all) of the weight from their cock. "Oh baby..." Your firm grip loosened too and you rubbed their sore scalp with your fingers. "You're a real girl. Of course, you are."

Their breath stopped for a moment, as if caught in their lungs.

They raised their gaze towards you and opened one tear-filled eye ever so slightly, needing to ask you something even through the thick haze of their suffering.

"You...you really think so?" They murmured quietly.

"I know so," You whispered with a gentle smile, grinding your heel down a little more, a reward for them continuing down the route you wanted. "You're whatever you want to be…and I’m here to make sure of that, aren’t I?"

They let out another whine, higher pitched and sweet sounding, a noise that edged close to a moan but caught itself just in time.

More tears slipped from their eyelashes, leaving small wet tracks down their flushed face.

It was a lovely visual.

"Thank you...thank you so much..." They let out a low breath, a sigh mixed with a whimper and another moan. "I'm, hhh...a bad girl..."

"Noooo, no no no, you don't get to beat yourself up anymore, baby," You cooed softly, a soft chiding tone as you stroked through their hair again, smiling even more as they leaned into your touch, as if seeking the contradictory comfort as opposed to the crushing pressure. "You're a good girl...doing this, like you should..."

"Y-yeah...I’m a good girl," They quickly corrected themself. "T-Trying to be...I really am..."

"You are such a good girl, Law," You continued to praise, stroking down their tear-streaked face, gently urging their chin upwards and their eyes towards you. "And you're going to be even better...because you're going to let me cage you up, just like Mommy, aren't you?"

They swallowed hard before sniffling, barely able to speak, and nodding as new tears began to fall down their angelic face.

They were evidently too overcome to speak, overwhelmed by the prospect of the two of you having matching cages (god, all those losers on Twitter would have loved that, you instantly thought), so they focused their attention on you, instead of trying to immediately make words.

You liked that plenty though.

It made you feel powerful, despite what the metaphorical value of your cock-cage key hanging around their neck should have meant.

You felt worshipped at the way they were kneeling before you, letting themself be kicked around and stood on and pet like a dog in your lap.

Like an animal, something to keep and possess.

“Yeah…I’ll do it." They nodded after a long moment, giving you a trembling smile. "I'd love to do it. I’ll be a good girl for you. I promise.”

Your maternal smile turned into something more genuine (more loving) as you ground your foot down a little harder against their cock, pulling their hair hard, keeping their body pinned against yours.

Sadism to reward their masochism. It felt good, doing it.

“Good girl.”

Their breath caught tightly in their chest and their eyes widened, letting loose another stream of tears with a broken cry.

One hand quickly came up to grasp at your knee through your tights, their pretty face twisting in pain as the heel of your shoe ground down even harder, their hips bucking uselessly against the pressure, trying to wrench themselves free of the pain.

"You take the pain so good, baby," You encouraged, gradually stroking their hair again and taking the weight off their cock. "...Do you need me to stop?"

After a moment, Lawrence gradually gave their head a slow shake, their skinny chest rising and falling as they took slow, deep breaths.

"N-no," They said, sniffling again. "No, I want to keep going. I...I want to be good for you, like you said. I want to be a good girl for you."

You beamed even brighter, before pulling your foot back and slamming it down again.

Another cry came out as a choked, strangled sort of noise, a small hiccup, followed by a few shaky breaths and near-silent sobs. You could see the tears rolling down their face readily now, their gentle features still twisted in a mixture of pain and pleasure.

“S-so…so good for you.” They grunted lowly, squeezing your knee a little tighter.

"Yes, so good..." You whispered encouragingly, curling your fingers into their hair again and gently urging their eyes upwards, forcing them to meet your gaze and see just how proud you were of them. "You're making mommy so proud, baby..."

Their expression softened, their features relaxing a little bit and their chest heaving with deep, shaky breaths as a hesitant smile graced their lips.

“Y-yeah?” They said, their voice still tremulous, as their other hand snaked around your thighs and clung to you close, needing, wanting. “I’m really doing good? I’m being your good girl?”

You smile again and lowered your head down, pressing more weight against their cock, before you gently swept strings of blonde hair out of their pretty face and kissed their forehead.

"The best ❤"

#lawrence oleander #lawrence btd #lawrence x mc #lawrence x reader #kinktober 2024 #echo #one of the faves #i love this one i care them so much <3

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