#i haven’t posted art here in years and when i finally do. this is what i post 🧍‍♂️

[silversaurian]

Captain Sabertooth, but as an actual sabertooth tiger hmmm

[tyquu]

Absolutely love your prosthetic Ezra AU. Arts so wonderful and stunning (Sorry if I spell it wrong, English is not my first language)

If you don't watch Asoka show you can ignore my question, because of spoilers)))

I have a bunch of little questions. Ezra spent almost ten years in other galaxy. What is the quality of his prosthesis when he returned home? How did he deal with breakdowns without the right tools and parts?

Anyway, love your AUs and amazing art style!

Wahhh thank you so much! Glad to hear you like the AU!

So I haven’t actually finished Ahsoka (I know, im sorry 😭) but at this point I feel like I know roughly enough to take a crack at this! So here’s what I came up with;

So, Ezra’s cybernetic, as discussed in the post where I went into detail on it, requires pretty regular maintenance in order to function. Stranded on Peridea and without access to any med care/tech from the chimera, Ezra’s cybernetic would begin to go faulty within months.

At most he’d probably be able to make things just about work for three months post crash before it would have to come off. Grabbing a stick to use as a cane, there would be a few months where he has to really go back to basics, and it is not ideal.

However, Ezra would get crafty! Either with supplies he’d have stolen from the chimera or gathered on his own, and he’d end up with various self made peg legs! They aren’t perfect but with every iteration tend to get a bit better.

After staying with the Noti for a while, he’d finally have access to better materials and craftsmanship, and make a final design for his post crash prosthetic. It includes an adjustable buckle, prosthetic knee mechanism, and polished wood transtibial prostheses below the knee.

Obviously it would still need the occasional part replacement due to wear and tear as time goes on, but I don’t think it would change drastically from this point onwards, not until he gets back to lesser space of course, where I’m sure he’d go get checked out by a whole med team and possibly get his cybernetic replaced

But yeah!! That’s all I’ve got. I’m not a massive Ahsoka believer tbh, and I kinda split off in the middle to dabble a little bit on what an “Ezra and Thrawn in wild space adventures” prosthetic situation would end up being like. Especially with the possibility of introducing the ascendancy. But I decided to halt that train of thought for now so I could address the Ahsoka show specifically 🫡

Thanks again for the ask! Hope this sort of makes sense (and please do let me know if it doesn’t!) :D)

[miviaceleste]

A Blackrock Story: A Boy with Turquoise Eyes

Happy 12th Anniversary to Blackrock Chronicle!

This comic ended up being 47 pages long (when I first sketched it, it was only 20 pages long). Since I can only upload 30 images in a post, I had to combine 2 pages into 1 image so hopefully it's still visually fine and not annoying to scroll through!

I wrote this mini-story more than 10 years ago, so I figured it was time to finally make it into a comic (after editing the writing a lot because I became a much better writer since lol).

Be aware of the TWs, and I hope you enjoy this comic!

TW: Violence || Blood || Injuries/Scars/Burn Marks || Kidnapping || (Temporary) Death || Loss of Limb / Amputation

Thank you all for reading one of my most insane projects ever!

Now, here’s another long story:

About 8 years ago, my life became so busy that to stay on top of my studies and activities, I stopped watching a lot of YouTubers, including the Yogscast.

I’ve grown up throughout the years. I had to stop acting like a kid to figure out what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I’m still an artist today, but I haven’t drawn in this way for about 3 years to pursue my real passion. I love to draw, but I didn’t have the time or inspiration to make something grand.

About 3 months ago, I suddenly got curious about how all those YouTubers I stopped watching were doing, so I checked out their channels and watched a video or two before moving on. When I got to the Yogscast channel, on the other hand, I quickly fell in love with the new content and with everyone again.

It was insane to see how immediately my love for them came back. In 3 months, I’ve watched so many videos and streams/VODs. It’s all so comforting, funny, and uplifting. Clearly, I missed so much content in the past 8 years, but at least I don’t have to worry about running out of things to watch for a while.

What made me most happy was that despite changing a lot, I never stopped being that kid who laughed at the Yogscast’s shenanigans. It just goes to show that no matter how much the world tries to push you around, you never lose that sense of joy you had as a child.

Now, about Rythian:

Since I started watching the Yogscast in 2011, Rythian has always been my favorite. I loved his series so much, especially with how he got into character to give us an immersive experience. It was an escape for me as a kid. When difficult moments were thrown at me, I watched Rythian’s series to find a sense of comfort.

So when I started watching his and Zoey’s Blackrock series, my mind was blown. The storytelling, acting, humor, and drama of the series were so immersive and touching that my creativity exploded.

I mainly use art to express myself and my interests because I struggle to talk about it. But funny enough, Blackrock was the only interest of mine that got me to not draw, but to write. I wrote a lot of short stories about the series—even how I envisioned the series would end. I was so inspired to create all the time from this series.

And what’s crazy is that at the beginning of this summer, I found all of those written drafts and notes from when I was a kid. I kept them all for 10+ years and found a very loose (and not that good) draft of this comic and I felt really inspired to finish it.

It was roughly when I was first watching Blackrock too when I realized that I can be creative in the future. The Yogscast helped me understand that I can do whatever I want for the rest of my life. If they could do it, then why can’t I?

What’s also wonderful is that even after so many years, Rythian never stopped being my favorite. When I started watching the main channel again a few months ago, I immediately found myself rooting for him whenever he was in the group videos. I just remembered how much happiness he brought me when I was younger and it makes me so happy that I still get so much joy whenever I hear his voice.

While working on this comic, I watched all of Kirbycraft and caught up on Kirby Farm. I can’t help but smile the whole time Rythian, Briony, and Kirsty interact with one another. The dynamic of these three brings me so much laughter and comfort. A part of me is upset that I didn’t get back to watching everyone when Kirbycraft was still live, but better late than never, right?

I also originally started this comic without the intention of posting it. But then I figured, Hey, it’d be great to share it with everyone who’s also been impacted by this series and the Yogscast in general, so I made this blog to post it here. Honestly, I’m not sure when the next time I’ll be able to draw is (who knew building a career takes away a lot of your energy and time?). But I think that’s what’s so wonderful about my love for Yogscast and particularly Blackrock: I didn’t make this comic for the likes or views. It was just because I wanted to, and I’m so happy to see there are so many people on here who feel the same love for them as I do.

This series and the people who made it, along with the people who supported it and loved it and continued to love it, impacted me for the better. I learned so many years ago that I can be creative for a living, and have been working hard towards doing that since.

Happy 12th Anniversary to the Blackrock Chronicle. To Rythian and Zoey who put a smile on this kid’s face even during the toughest of times.

And to the Yogscast, thank you for being there for me when I needed you all the most and for still being here when I came back. Your ability to inspire me and make me laugh never disappeared throughout the years I was gone, and I’m ready to laugh some more.

[koimethehorizon]

Fionna and Cake theory: Simon the Artist

Nothing like a good old creative panic attack.

Fionna and Cake good. Haven’t been excited about a show like this in a long time, though it being a part of Adventure Time does help quite a bit. I was holding on to some cautious optimism for the show when it was announced as yet another big IP series covering the multiverse (still waiting to groan at THAT scene where Prismo has to explain to us about there being infinite universes), but as usual, Adventure Time’s crew continues to surprise me with its creativity, humor, and thematic resonance.

The most striking part about Fionna and Cake so far is just how deliberately the show wants us to differentiate it from the original Adventure Time.

We’re getting shots where Simon pops an artery from his arm, a theme song that explicitly talks about suicidal ideation, discussions of rent and financial problems, and curses no longer disguised with AT’s usual dialogue. Adventure Time has always had violence, thematic density, and juvenile rating pushers, but they were always reserved at small points. Meanwhile, these are factors that are just casually shown and discussed in Fionna and Cake every 3 minutes or so. This is not an all-ages miniseries, it’s for young adults. (hint: this will be relevant later)

Let’s get right into it. This is much less a speculative lore theory and more on what thematic direction the story may be going.

Before we do, let’s get this out of the way first. This theory assumes that the current Fionna and Cake world is all a part of Simon’s head and not merely a separate multiverse, which… I’m certain is fact for the following reasons.

The immediately obvious piece is that Fionna and Cake was always the Ice King’s fanfiction. Now if you’re versed in AT’s continuity you’re probably going to be asking about the red light in Fionna and Cake + Fionna and… I’ve no answer for it unfortunately. It’ll probably be relevant later in the series and possibly age this post like milk but for now, we’re not here to focus on the how, but the why.

Second is that the intro and the ending of Ep 2 literally show Fionna’s world spilling right out of Simon’s head like an animated world out of a frozen brain. If that isn’t clear enough-

Didn't realize this until writing, but these glasses are just plastic made to look like Betty's

There’s no other explanation for this other than that this world is artificial or influenced by Simon in some sense. Fionna even specifies that the statue went under renovation 12 years ago, but nobody seems to know who it is. Considering how Finn looks in the episode, it’s likely that it’s been that long since Betty’s sacrifice in the finale.

With that out of the way, here it goes.

The reason Fionna and Cake exist in the first place is because the creators found Natasha Allegri’s genderswap designs charming and wanted an in-universe reason to use them the Ice King wanted to create trashy, wish fulfillment through art. It was a phase.

Definitely changed that image for publishing.

Simon can argue if they’re good or bad but it’s undeniably his art. It’s not just a portfolio he left behind in a closet, it’s an experience that was shared with a larger audience.

And even if wasn’t liked at first, the citizens of Ooo seemed to have come around to it. And some of them love it!

Whether Simon likes it or not, he has a fan base that is so endeared to the story he made all those years ago that they demand he makes more. Why let a good story, loved by many, go to rest when you still have some life and creativity left in you?

Can't move on in more ways than one.

Except, the problem is that Simon isn’t Ice King anymore. He’s aged out of it.

His real passion is history, he's an adult who who finds passion in the mundane and antiques from the past. And frankly, there isn’t much room for wish-fulfillment and fantasy anymore. Simon has responsibilities. He has a job and a daughter in a world that is moving faster than he can process.

And where Ice King wrote about looking for love, Simon has already had it.

And lost it. His mind isn’t focused on the rosiness of finding new love, it’s grieving the one he already thought was the one.

Wasn't he supposed to be good with kids?

Despite his new life experiences, all his peers seem to want from him is to make more of what they’re familiar with.

A story made from wants and wishes that he doesn’t even have anymore.

A story that was literally made by someone else at a different time. It’s a fiction he cannot connect to anymore, art that he’s embarrassed by. Yet also jealous of. Because at one point, the body Simon used to be in understood what exactly was missing from his life and could express that easily.

Seeing it again is like experiencing a retrospection of a cringey loser you don’t want to imagine having ever been. It’s not you anymore, and you don’t want to be reminded of that.

Because despite him having a new creative passion, no one seems to care about that. All they want is Fionna and Cake. And what is more lonely than other people misunderstanding what you’re trying to express?

If I failed to make it clear somehow, my theory is that: Simon’s relationship with Fionna and Cake is a metaphor for creators growing out of their art. And this new Fionna and Cake world is still comfort art born out of Simon’s current desires and perceptions.

The snippet subtitles this “child holding a phone”. I guess I’m wrong. Essay over.

Episode 1 and 2 both have direct parallels with each other. They’re both about a protagonist who are feeling displaced from their world, living a phase of losing a significant other, leaving a thankless job, wearing a mask of stability in front of the people they care for, seeking a guru at the heart of the forest, and concluding that they no longer belong in their current world.

But more importantly, Fionna and Cake (the characters, the world, and the show) are no longer for an all-ages crowd. Fionna and Cake now feature young adults, curses, gore, alcohol, partial nudity, financial issues, morning routines, mid-life crisis, and overt suicidal ideation. These are the feelings that Simon relates to and possibly desires to express through art. Thus, his story and our new miniseries have warped that way.

Am I overthinking this? No. How dare you assume that.

Is equating the unconscious writings of his dementia-ridden self to Simon as his younger self seem a bit odd? ….Kinda. Again, it’s not the how but the why that matters in this case. I'm NOT crazy, I have proof that there is some acknowledgment of this directly in the show.

Rewatch the bar scene and apply this reading of the episode to what Simon says there:

“Your old stuff, Fionna and Cake, honest to glob my man, is an inspiration to me.”

“My old stuff, I don’t really want to talk about my old stuff…”

“Why not? You should be proud! You wrote an entire extended universe in a fugue state if you think about it.”

"Simon cringes"

If you have ever shared art with a group of people in the past, you’ve had this conversation.

Not likely, not possibly, no perhapses. You HAVE.

And Fionna and Cake being an epilogue to a massive award-winning, near-decade-spanning, cultural sensation 5 years after it ended, might result in its creators feeling very retrospective about what audiences want from them now.

And how difficult it’s going to be to tell new experiences and tones from what’s come before. Also, come on. “Extended Universe?” That doesn’t sound like Fionna and Cake. That sounds a lot like something else.

Again, seems bad with this kid.

One of the more profound shots in the main trailer for the show features the inconspicuously Finn-like kid crouching at her Fionna and Cake book in Simon’s trash. I believe this character is going to have a major role in two ways. Convincing Simon to be proud of what he’s accomplished and/or embracing that Simon wants to move away from his original work in order to create something new, or perhaps more likely, reinvent Fionna and Cake into what Simon relates to now.

We’ll just have to see what Simon thinks of his new Fionna next week.

PS. Talking as a fan now, WHAT IS UP WITH THE 1000+ TREEHOUSE IN THE INTRO?!!! ARE WE REVISITING THIS TIMELINE AGAIN?

SOMEONE TELL ME NOW!!!

[thealexchen]

hi! i recently got back into lis2 again and that made me really curious - do you still agree with a majority of the critiques you made on lis2 in 2020? i know it's been 4 years since that post was made, but i actually do remember when you dropped this critique on a separate account and i'd thought it was an interesting one to keep in mind back then :)

i appreciated a lot of what you have to say, even if i respectfully disagree with almost all of it 😭 - i didn't want to drop a whole "why" i disagree discussion on here because it seems kind of rude to drop such a huge thing about it haha, but i would like to say that this critique actually did stick with me for a bit and i appreciate that you made it when you did! your account was a big lis2 acc that i remember back in the day, and i always loved seeing your posts!

Hi there and thanks for your ask! I think I may know who you are, but you did get me thinking about that critique again (has it been four years already?? Jesus). After rereading it again, I have to say my overall opinions haven’t changed… I’m just not as invested in them as I used to be.

Since DE came out, I’ve seen a drastic shift from favoring D9 to DN, but I really think the reception comes down to their creative choices (or lack thereof). When I gave my initial thoughts on DE in May, I said that D9’s games rely heavily on fanservice to be marketable, while LiS2 was divisive from the jump because it was so obviously rooted in DN’s prioritization of making a game out of passion and not what would sell well (a continuation of Max and Chloe’s story). People have mostly been complaining that DE feels written without much thought or care for the original game, with lazy offscreen narrative decisions. Unfortunately, I believe this output is really due to D9 being puppeteered by Square to “corporatize” this series to death, which I find really depressing.

When LiS1 first debuted in 2015, the gaming industry was still recovering from Gamergate (which proved how misogynistic it still was) and LGBT+ issues were finally achieving mainstream attention, both positive and negative. The media storm surrounding LiS1 all focused on how different it was. It was truly radical at the time to turn what would be a typical Sundance indie film plot into an interactive AA game and make it mainstream. I think both the positive attention from gamers starved for a story like this and the negative attention calling it “Life is Tumblr” contributed to its massive popularity and attention that hasn’t been matched since.

I have always, always believed (like since 2018) in LiS being an anthology series and letting Max and Chloe’s story end. “Farewell” was supposed to be that, and I was really excited to see what DN was making next and hopeful I could fall in love with LiS2 like I did the first game. Even if I found LiS2’s narrative choices really frustrating, I still respect DN for sticking to their vision. Honestly, Michel Koch deserves his flowers so much for staying active on Twitter through years of fan hate and complaining and posting consistently respectful replies, even as his own characters have likely become unrecognizable to him.

But while DN stuck to their vision about LiS2, I think the main contextual issue with the game (and where my critiques came from) is there was too much pressure to follow up an accidental hit. DN wanted to follow up LiS1 with an even bigger, more serious, more ambitious, maybe more “artistic” and “daring” game that was boldly political… but I just don’t think they achieved that. The game still looks beautiful, with a strong soundtrack, art direction, moments of calm, and great environmental storytelling like the first game. But while LiS1 lured you into a false sense of security with its cozy vibes and high school setting, only to blindside gamers with heartbreaking and shocking plot twists late in the game, LiS2 is just a misery fest from start to end in an attempt to be as serious and memorable as the first game. There isn’t enough joy and nostalgia (DN is SO good at nostalgia) to contrast the sorrow, and the game wasn’t as memorable or fun to play for me.

My main critique in 2020 was the game relies too much on a violent trauma narrative without proper research and content warnings. Looking back on it now, I think DN internalized the praise too strongly that LiS1 was daring and different. They tried to be even more topical and bold without regard to how actual players of color might react to the racial violence onscreen. In addition, I critiqued LiS2 for not showcasing the positive aspects of Sean and Daniel’s Mexican heritage to contrast all the racism, and I thought True Colors did a better job at including meaningful and positive cultural details for Alex and Gabe’s family. They likely didn’t think to research more carefully how to depict POC (and how the standards for sensitive representation might be different in the U.S. compared to France). American politics are also wayyyy more complex than what’s on the news, and have a massive historical, social, and economic background, and nowadays, I’ll cut DN some slack and say I think that’s too much to tackle for any game. Yes, DN could’ve done better, but I wouldn’t critique them as harshly today, and I know they had good intentions.

If the pressure to follow up LiS1 wasn’t there, maybe LiS2 could’ve been different. Maybe DN wouldn’t have bit off more they could chew, or maybe this game could’ve been made independently of the LiS series and judged on its own merit. A game like Tell Me Why shows how DN is at their best when they tell smaller, nostalgic stories and are able to do the right research and collaborate with the right consultants and actors. I hope Lost Records can be the same, since DN is pitching it from the jump as an anthology and likely their do-over of LiS as their own independent studio.

Thank you again for asking! It was nice to revisit my critique. If you’d still like to talk about it, I am down for a friendly debate!

[the1975attheirverybest]

Education

Lesson #7: Communication is KEY.

A/N: well; you asked for it. It’s here.

Warnings: smut. Also not entirely proof read cuz I wanted to post it today for y’all so…

———

“Amelia?” Matty called out to her from behind the door, resting his forehead against it. “Can I please come in?” He cooed.

He knocked this time, in case she hadn’t heard him, “Amelia, darlin, please let me in.” He listened carefully for a shuffling of feet, any signs of movement at all, but none came. Soon, he began to pace back and forth to alleviate the raging of his heart. “Amelia, please. Open the door- please, I need to know that you’re alright.”

The silence was unbearable. As he paced by the bathroom door, Matty went over the events of the night in his mind, combing through every detail as he remembered it, trying to identify the moment that things went wrong.

He’d spent the entire way to the party wondering if she was going to be there. She’d designed the art work for the album that they were about to celebrate, so he’d hoped that Jamie would’ve had the sense to invite her. It’d gotten difficult to get a hold of her after their last phone call. Which, embarrassingly, he’d been too drunk to remember the details of. He has a vague recollection of talking to her, touching himself, alone, in his hotel bed, listening to her moan on the other end of the phone and wishing that she were eighth there with him. But he doesn’t remember much else. The texts were sparse and far between after that night. She wouldn’t pick up whenever he tried to FaceTime her. He’d written it off as time zone issues. It wouldn’t be the first time that his friendships or relationships were affected by his itinerant lifestyle. As he’d learned the hard way, over the years, nothing beats being in the same room with people. No matter how good distant connection is.

He’d spotted her soon after arriving at the event; seen her standing with a group of people that she doesn’t really like. He knew she was too polite to excuse herself from the conversation, so he figured if he inserted himself into the group, he could help pull her away.

If he was being honest with himself, his escape to LA was anything but effective, he’d thought about her every night while he was there. Even when he met up with his hookup. He was ashamed that he’d close his eyes and think of Amelia every time that another woman touched him. Try to remember what she sounded like. How good she felt wrapped around him the last time that he’d fucked her. How good he felt being with her. It took everything in him not to call out her name in another woman’s bed.

So, of course he’d been eager to finally see her again. But was that so wrong? Is that what hurt her? Was he pushy when he asked her to go into the bathroom with him? Did she not want to? She did hesitate, briefly, but he thought it was just because it was an entirely new thing that she’d never done before. And that was the whole point of their arrangement. He was meant to make her feel safe to try things out and figure out what she liked. Gain confidence to do things with other people. How’d they get from that to here?

Matty slid against the bathroom door crumbling yo the floor. “I just want you to know I’m right here, okay? I’m gonna stay right here. I just- I don’t know how to- I don’t know what to do right now, but I’m still here. I haven’t left you. I’m not going to.”

He ran his hands through his hair, attempting to breathe, deeply, and collect himself. Patience has never been a virtue that he possessed, though. “Oh, fuck this.” He mumbled before standing back up and banging on the door. “Amelia, please! Open this fuckin door! At least make a sound so I know that you’re okay in there. I can’t be out here thinking that- that you’ve hit your head against something and need- need- fuck! open this fuckin door!” He banged on the door repeatedly, more aggressive this time, as his patience wore thin.

His hands hurt from knocking against the door and his chest felt tight with worry. He won’t take this anymore. “Right, that’s it, then. I’m getting something to unlock this door with.”

With a 4 minutes YouTube tutorial, a butter knife, and one of his credit cards, he finally managed to open the door without breaking it.

“Oh, Amelia…” his heart sunk when he saw her, sobbing on the bathroom floor, her whole, naked body shaking. The sight paralyzed him for what felt like an eternity. His worst fear had come true. In trying to protect her from the hurt of the potential ill-intentions and miscommunications of complete strangers, by offering to be the person that she could experiment on, or with, he’d somehow wound up hurting her himself. The worst part is that he had no idea what he’d done wrong.

This moment wasn’t about his self-pity and indulgent guilt, he’d feel his feelings later on. Right now, he needed to be there for her. He ran into the room to grab the first thing he could find — his own shirt— and brought it back to wrap her up in, carrying her in his arms. His heart pounded against his chest, terrified that he’d make a wrong move and fuck this up, even more, so he narrated every single step he took, waiting a moment to give her the chance to object.

“Gonna just put this on you, so you don’t catch a cold…alright?” She said nothing. “I- umm- wanna get off the floor?” Again, nothing. “Well- I’m going to pick you up now, okay? If you want me to stop, just- say…say something.” “Bringing you to bed now, unless- well, unless you want to be sat somewhere else.”

She made no effort to protest or to stop him, so he took that as permission and proceeded, slowly, gently, as lightly as he could. His delicate touch and strong arms were a far cry from what was going through his mind. Matty held her in his arms as she wept into his bare chest. With every breath she took, every sniffle, and every tear drop that fell from her face onto his skin, his heart broke over and over again until he thought it couldn’t possible hurt any worse- and then it did.

When he felt her finally go still, her trembling breath calm and even, he looked down, and saw that she was asleep. Should he be relieved that, at least, she wasn’t crying anymore? Or should he focus on thr fact that, whatever he’d done had caused her to cry her eyes out, literally, to the point where she could no longer keep them open? He didn’t have it in him to move her or disrupt the first moment of peace that she’d had all night. So as his body went numb underneath her weight, he replayed their night in his mind, yet again, silent tears running down his face.

***

It was 3 am when Matty awoke from a dreamless sleep. Amelia was now fully wearing his shirt, all buttoned up, and clinging to his body, her legs intertwined in his, her cheek against his stomach, as she slept. The lights were turned out all the way, so she must’ve woken up at some point and walked around the hotel suite. When he stretched out his arm to feel around for his phone, he felt a water bottle on the nightstand. At least she’d had some water. That’s a good sign. Or was he desperate for anything to convince him that she was alright? Did he not deserve to feel relieved yet? Would he ever? He felt weak looking down at her. He wanted to kiss her forehead, to take her pain away, but he had this unshakable feeling that he’d break her, hurt her, cause her harm, if he ever touched her again.

In the morning, his body felt cold without Amelia pressed up against him. He had one text on his phone. It hurt his eyes to read it before they’d blink away the sleep. Mia ❤️: had to leave for a work thing. I’m okay. Thank you.

This was the worst news that he could’ve woken up to. He slammed his head harshly against the pillow, a loud cry tore through his chest.

***

“Matty?” Adam stood in the doorway, smiling, as he watched Matty sprawled out on the floor, arranging his son’s toys in some sort of circle, mumbling to the kid as if they were engaged in a serious conversation. “It’s been a while, what’re you two up to?” Adam walked over to them.”

“We’re creating toy rankings” Matty said matter-of-factly. “You know, like the Premier League tables?”

Adam giggled, Shaking his head. “Okay; I know the baby can’t be THAT entertaining and I’m his dad. So, who or what are you hiding out here from? And why couldn’t you do it at your own house?”

Matty glanced at Adam briefly before returning his attention to the army of toys. “Not hiding.”

“It’s Amelia, isn’t it?” Adam sighed loudly, joining Matty on the floor and instantly taking his son into his lap. “What’ve you done this time?”

Matty ceased his fiddling, cocking his head in shame. “I- erm…I- maybe didn’t pay attention when I should have.” Saying it out loud began to help piece together the situation in his head. “She- was trying to let me know that- that she wasn’t alright. I completely missed it.”

“Don’t sound much like you.” Despite Adam’s concern, he put on a cheerful demeanor to keep his boy happy. The contrast between his face and his words gave the conversation an eerie feel. Marty found it mildly distressing, if fatherly and admirable.

“I know. I fucked things up. Badly.”

“Well, have you apologized to her?”

“I- I want to. I just….can’t look her in the eye. And…..well, if that’s how I feel - Can’t imagine how she must feel.”

Adam said nothing for a long moment. When he spoke again, Matty hadn’t expected him to still be on that train of thought. “Let me ask you this: do you and Amelia ever just….hang out?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, like, not for sex. Just- for the sake of hanging out.”

Matty rolled his eyes, insulted by the implications of the question. “Of course we do. All the fuckin time. We went to see a film not too long ago, and, she came to see the set when we were working on the designs for tour. She stayed at mine one night cuz she was too drunk to go home…..” Matty paused, catching his breath, “do you need the dates and times as well? The fuck is ‘do you hang out?’ What kind of question is that!”

“Matty,” Adam looked him straight in the eyes, noting that, by his defensiveness, Adam must’ve hit upon a sore subject. “this all happened before the two of you started….well, fucking. Have you spent any time together as friends since then?”

Matty’s lips instantly parted, he was about to respond with “of course we have! What a ridiculous thing to ask!!” But, as he thought about it, he realized that Adam was right. He and Amelia were no longer really friends. His expression shifted from offended to embarrassed.

“It’s not like you’re incapable of maintaining the friendship.” Adam consoled him. “You’ve slept with friends of yours and kept them as friends before. So, why won’t you do it with Amelia?”

“I-I don’t know. It’s not on purpose. The time has just not been right recently. It’s just the way things have been going. I’ve just been busy. You know this. Band stuff.”

“So you have time to fuck her, but you don’t have time to hang out with her?”

Matty winced unable to bare hearing that about himself. “Well, not when you put it like that….She came to me and asked for this! We made an agreement- it’s not like that! You’re making me sound like a fuckin creep.”

“Go.” Adam nodded towards the door. “Go on, go apologize to her. I gotta get this little man ready for bedtime, anyway. Uncle Matty’s gotta go.”

***

Amelia was stunned when she answered the door, “Matty, what are you-“

“May I come in?” He spoke too quickly, nerves taking over him.

It was late. Plus, Matty never came over unannounced. So, with some confusion and concern, she let him in.

“What’s all this?” She pointed to the bags in his hands.

“We’ll get to that in a minute.” He waved her question away, his eyes scanning the apartment that he’s been to countless times before, with new found novelty. Anything to avoid eye contact. “Wanted to- erm…” he stuttered, still looking around. “how- how’re you feeling? You know, af-after the other night?” Matty stumbled over his words. He’d imagined this conversation going differently in his head. He’d even practiced his words on the way over here. But now that he was standing in front of her, certainty and practiced delicacy had left him. He was terrified. “You left before we could talk…”

Amelia led the way to the kitchen, with Matty trailing sheepishly behind her. She helped him set down the bags l in the kitchen while she considered his question. The answer was too complicated. She shrugged. “I’m okay….I think? I don’t know. I don’t know how I’m feeling. One minute I’m fine, and the next….” She was surprised to feel herself get so emotional so quickly.

All Matty could think was. you did this. You hurt her. You’re the reason she feels this way. He wanted to pick up one of her kitchen knives off the counter and pierce it through his own heart.

“Let- let’s sit down somewhere? Is that alright?”

Amelia’s brows furrowed. It wasn’t like him to be so uncertain. “Sure.”

In the living room, the sat on opposite ends of the same couch, Matty nervously fiddling with the sleeve of his jacket. “So- I think….I think I know how you’re feeling and why it happened. Would you like to hear it?” He looked up at her, briefly.

She smiled nervously. “Sure- I mean, any ideas would be better than no ideas.”

“I think, well, I think we pushed you too far in the bathroom. I was a bit more aggressive than normal.” Matty’s voice got caught in his throat, so he paused, collecting himself. He was determined not to make this about himself and his feelings. He mustn’t speak unless he’s sure that he can control his tone.

���Y-yeah. I mean, I guess? The- umm, hair pulling, and the whole bending over thing…you being demanding. We’d never done any of that before.”

Matty nodded, “go-go on. It’s good. It’s good to hear you say these things.”

“Not sure what else to say.” She shrugged. “I mean, I liked it. All of it. It was just…a shock. Like, too many new things at the same time, you know?”

“Mhm…keep- keep going.” Matty was positively trembling.

“Ummm….I don’t know. That’s it I guess? It was just overwhelming for a moment. But for some reason it made things better. Like- when you told me to fade away from you and bend over? At first- I panicked-“

“Can I ask why?” His eyes shot up, meeting hers.

“Oh, gosh. This is embarrassing.” She mumbled under her breath. “Cuz- cuz I couldn’t see you. I like seeing your face. I like being able to tell that you were happy with me. That I was doing what you wanted me to do.” Her face turning read, she smiled. “But- the panic, it made the orgasm even better. I didn’t hate it, necessarily….it was just…a lot.”

Matty was tongue tied, his thoughts spiraling. He couldn’t find a beginning or an end to anchor himself to.

“Matty? Are you with me?” Amelia attempted to meet his gaze. “Honestly, I mean it! It didn’t hurt or feel unpleasant. I just-“

“Yeah, well, we’ve talked about this happening in theory.” Matty finally regained his footing. “Remember when I told you to read some shit about ‘subspace’ ? I think…..the excitement, the pain, the pleasure, the anxiety- perfect storm. A cocktail of Adrenalin and endorphins to push you over the edge.”

“Oh.”

“Would explain the sudden inability to speak…the overly emotional state, the….eagerness to do more.” Matty listed all the indications that he recalled her showing.

“Can I ask….Is that- umm….would it also happen to be why everything felt so…strong? Like lights and noises and stuff?”

Matty’s heart ached in his chest. He was sure that kitchen knife stab would be easier to take than this. “Fuck me…..yes, yes it would explain that as well.” He closed his eyes, willing the tears to stay where they are. “Anyway, so, I think, all of that, then throwing that new restrained position on you…demanding that you get me off…it may have been a mistake.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Not ‘may.’ It was a mistake. Definitely. It was my mistake. And I’m- I’m sorry.”

Amelia didn’t know how to feel about this new revelation. She was glad to have an explanation for how her body and her mind had felt, not to feel so helpless over her emotions, but she had no idea what to make of any of it.

“It gets worse.” Matty confessed. “Once you’d safe-worded, i- I should’ve done more. Been better. Taken better care of you.”

“Oh. No…matty you did good. I felt okay. I mean, not really, I was feeling entirely disconnected from my body, but-“

“Yeah that’d be the subspace psychology…”

“Like afterwards. I felt okay waking up the next morning. Just….confused and embarrassed.”

Matty laughed. “So…not okay.”

She smiled at him, “it’s really not that bad, looking back on it now…”

“I was scared. I owed you better. But I was scared that I’d hurt you. I suppose I- didn’t want to admit to myself that I’d missed all the signs. Let it get to a point where you had to tap out. And we hadn’t umm….we hadn’t made a real plan for what happens if you do tap out. I mean, we have our aftercare routine for afterwards….but, I should’ve anticipated that we’d both be in a completely different headspace if we stopped suddenly.” He shrugged. “I got lazy on you.”

“Matty-“

“I did! It’s true. I got complacent. Comfortable. Things were going so well that I didn’t think anything bad could ever happen between us. So- so I was less prepared!!! Even though im always on you about always being prepared. And speaking up. Fuck- what a hypocrite.”

“Matty, don’t say that!”

“I’ve failed you. And I’m so, so, sorry, Amelia.” Matty finally burst into tears. But it didn’t feel enough. He wanted to get on his knees and beg, bow down to her and tell her how much she didn’t deserve his negligence. How much he wishes it were the other way around.

Allowing himself a moment of release, Matty quickly wiped the tears from his eyes and jumped to his feet. “Anyway, erm….the bags in the kitchen. I- I brought some things that we could- I mean, if you’d allow me- and I completely understand if you’d rather not- to make it up to you….take care of you the way that I should have that night. I’ve bought some things. So we could see what you might like to have on hand for emergencies like that. That is….uhhh- if, of course, you’d ever let me touch you again.”

Amelia smiled. “Yeah, I’d like that very much.”

***

“Okay, and then…once you’re calm, well, I guess I’d wanna check for injuries or something.” Matty was running down a new checklist he’d created to ensure that not a single detail is ever lost on him again. “But, since, I’m days later now, and we didn’t use anything that could hurt you….I’ve drawn you a bath, so, if you’d go in there, and- You enjoy that while I get you some food and water.”

“You’d leave me?” Amelia’s voice sounded needier than she’d intended. “By myself?”

Matty was stumped. It was a good thing they were running this rehearsal. “I- erm…had assumed that you’d want some space.”

She shook her head passionately. “No, no! Not at all. All I wanted, that whole night, was you.”

Matty stood there, blinking rapidly, staring at her face. “Okay, then. I’ll sit by the bathtub? Keep you company…”

She stepped forward, hesitantly, decreasing the space between them. “Please get into the bath? With me?” Matty could tell, by the blushing in her face, that this wasn’t easy for her either. “Want you to hold me, please?”

Matty nodded, silently, and began to undress.

***

“Here, you can uhhh…you can have this to wear.”

Amelia looked down at his extended arm and the t shirt that he was offering, chuckling heartily. It was that old ragged brown t shirt that was not so oversized when he’d first bought it. “You love that horrific thing. It’s like your favorite, for some reason.”

“Yes, and you hate it, but it is my favorite, so….now, it’s yours. You know, to wear on days like that. For- I don’t know. Comfort? Not to be so presumptuous as-“

“Shut up and hand it over before I set it on fire or something.”

***

In bed, Matty wrapped his strong, thick arms around her, squeezing her tight, breathing in her hair. She held onto his bicep, her hand tiny in comparison, stroking his arm, up and down, running her fingers over his tattoos. This, she thought to herself, must be the safest place on earth.

With considerable effort, Amelia wiggled within Matty’s tight grip, turning around so she was face to face with him, wrapping her arms around his neck, and pulling herself closer to kiss him. For the first time ever, Matty was stiff to her touch, his lips passive. It wasn’t long before he pulled away, slightly.

“Amelia- what….we shouldn’t.” He whispered despite them being completely alone.

“Matty, please?”

“I don’t want to hurt you again.”

“You’re not going to.”

“It’d be wrong. To- to take advantage. You’re vulnerable right now, and-“

“So are you.” She placed a kiss to his cheek, smiling faintly as she watched his face grow red.

“It’s my job to protect you- we agreed, I’d be a safe trial. I-“

“Please, I need you. I didn’t get to make you feel good last time. Please? Don’t want you to get into the habit of treating me like glass, I’d hate that.”

When he said nothing in return, she kissed him again, and this time, he kissed her back, his arms easing their grip on her, hands lowering to grab her bum. She moaned softly, smiling against his lips.

Matty hovered over her, now naked, body dipping his head to leave gentle kisses all over her.

“Stunning, you are.” He kissed the space between her breasts; her eyes fluttered shut. “Perfect.” He kissed her a little lower this time. “Gorgeous.” He was halfway to her belly button. Her hands naturally moved to hold his curls between them, her breathing quick and shallow, more desperate the closer that he got to her core.

“So good for me,” he mumbled against her skin, his breath raising goosebumps all over her, which did not go unnoticed by Matty.

He grinned, reveling in his power over her body. “Gonna make you feel so good, darlin,’ I promise.”

“Oh, Matty…” she whined, “please do.” Her neck strained against the pillow; her entire body jolting when she felt Matty’s mouth, suddenly, at her clit. “Fuckkk! Yeah….”

Matty growled, smiling to himself. He forbade his other senses from feeling anything but her. His eyes shut, his ears focused only on her melodious sounds. A zealous worshipper, every breath he drew was all her, taking breaks only to kiss and nib the insides of her thighs, his armpinning her down, firmly, as she writhed and shook. Not even her reflexive pulls at his hair could deter him. He was determined to give all of himself to her.

“Sorry, erm…” he smiled, shyly. “Condom.”

She felt his sudden absence sorely, whining out and calling for him to hurry back.

“I know, I know. Sorry, love.”

She heard him wince and shuffle onto the bed and knew that he was back.

“You ready for me?”

“Mhm, please, please, I need you.”

Matty had to restrain himself from instantly pulling her into his arms to ravage his insatiable lust for her, reminding himself that he wanted this to be gentle, soft, precise, slow.

She felt the slow pressure and opened her eyes to watch him throw his head back in pleasure, a long and drawn out moan leaving his lips.

“Fuuuuckkk mee- Amelia. So, fffuckin good. So tight.”

Matty’s chest rose and fell rapidly as he began to thrust into her, soon finding his rhythm. Once he’d given himself a moment to adjust, his finger was back on her clit, gently stroking it the way he knows she needed.

“Ohhh my god, Matty…” she whimpered.

“I know, my love. I’ve got you.” He leaned forward, taking her hands in his and intertwining their fingers together. He laid on top of her, his chest pressed into hers with the full weight of his body.

“You feel s-so good.” He cried out, the overwhelming pleasure bringing tears to her eyes.

Matty kissing and sucking at the skin underneath her ear put her over the edge. She gasped, incoherently repeating “I- I’m gonna- cum…but it’s - it’s too much.”

“It’s okay, it’s okay. I’ve got you, darlin. Let go, it’s gonna feel g- oh my god- good.”

He felt both her hands squeeze his tightly and knew that she wouldn’t hold on much longer.

With a loud cry of his name, she gasped sweetly into his ear, and he felt her clench and gush around him, trembling as she came undone.

Matty himself couldn’t hold on for much either, her squeezing him tightly through her orgasm, sent his own waves of pleasure on the heels of hers, his head falling to her shoulder, he moaned softly, his eyelashes tickling her skin.

Matty thought he’d heard her whisper “I love you” into his ear as the rush of excitement flooded his mind.

***

Neither of them had the heart to be the one to pull away first, so they remained in that intermingled state, basking in the afterglow of that release, nothing but the hot air, and their rapid breathing mellowing out, in the room around them.

Amelia swallowed harshly, her mouth feeling dry even as her body glistened with hers and Matty’s sweat.

“I love you.” She said more clearly this time.

He couldn’t have mistaken her words this time. And if he had any doubt at all, the feeling of her heart beating furiously against his, after it had just calmed down, was unmistakable.

Matty remained perfectly still, his mind blank. It was it racing so quickly that it was impossible to hold onto any thought? He couldn’t tell the difference.

“Matty? I love you.” Amelia spoke again, helpless to stop herself. Now that it was spilling out of her, it was as if the floodgates had opened. She loves him. She loves him. She loves him….

[irondadfics]

Hey umm sorry if I am bothering you with this but there is a ao3 fanfiction I thought I saved this but I can't find it all I remember was it was no way home event and tony is alive and I believe was the only one to remember Peter and I think Peter had a job in a bar as bartender?? If you can't find it do you have some recommendations of ao3 fanfiction of tony being alive and is the only one who remembers Peter?

we couldn’t find the one you were looking for, but here’s a few recommendations. The last two don’t have Tony remembering, but are still worth checking out. Happy reading!

To Be Better by autumdragon

Peter shakily says, “you need to let me leave.” “You will,” Tony reasons gently. “You will. Those doors will open the second you calm down.” The indignation morphs into fierce anger because “those doors will open the second you input the security override code,” he snaps. Peter may be freaking out right now, but he’s not an idiot. Caught, Tony pauses to look at him, to zero in and search. And Peter, terrified, grits his teeth and looks away. He can’t stomach being studied like that, and – he just, he really needs to leave right now. The standoff lasts for a few more seconds before finally Tony eases off: “FRIDAY, temporarily deactivate Baby Monitor Protocol – override code One-Zero-One-Seven-Two-Zero-Two-Three.” 1-0-1-7-2-0-2-3 October 17, 2023… Feeling sick, his lost eyes snap back to searching ones. The elevator doors open behind him but he doesn't move, choosing instead to stare at Mr. Stark as the weight bearing down on his chest sinks just a little further. Squeezing his shoulder, Tony explains: “The day I got you back.” Despondent, Peter pushes the hand off him. “The day I lost you.”

Peter Parker's Tapeworm by Ginevra_Benci

Everyone forgets that Peter Parker is Spider-Man. Everyone includes Peter Parker.

Blue memento by Bergen

Post-NWH. The Avengers haven’t been much of a group since they defeated Thanos, since a large fraction of the team died, retired, went AWOL or MIA. It’s mainly up to Sam and Bucky – with some help from a still recovering Tony – to catch the latest enhanced serial killer roaming the streets of New York. Until a random college student from MIT named Peter Parker suddenly seems to have some answers. Sam is cautious. Tony is intrigued. Bucky is the voice of reason for a change.

O Brother, Where Art Thou? by theskeptileptic

8 year-old Morgan is struggling after the death of her mom. Her dad is working non-stop and her extended family of emotionally constipated superheroes are just as uncomfortable with her grief as their own. To top it off, she can't stop dreaming about a brother she's never had and all the trouble he might be in. When she convinces Tony to take her with him on a work trip to Caltech, she meets a student who looks a lot like the boy in her dreams. Unfortunately, he doesn't seem very interested in her. Good thing her dad always knows what to do. A sort of No Way Home, Everyone Lives (Except May and Pepper) Fix It story, where Morgan channels major Pepper Potts vibes, Tony channels major concerned Dad vibes, and Peter channels major college age-Tony Stark vibes. Served with a splash of angst, a heap of trauma, and a sprig of making adults take proper care of one depressed spider child.

[slutouttanowhere]

Tatted | J. Uso

paring: jey uso x mavis pete (my oc)

authors note: this is a wip that’s been sitting in my docs for months, I had bigger plans for it at the time, but it seems like that’s just not happening. ive been desperate to post something lol, so I hope y’all still enjoy this regardless.

Mavis finally had a weekend off, being a full time college student, while working a 9-5 is hell on wheels. Today she decided to treat herself by going out, splurging at the mall, and finally getting that tattoo she had been putting off for a month now. She didn’t know much about the place, Just that Liv and Rhea highly recommend it. “Mmm looks like nobody’s here…there’s a car out back.” She mumbled to herself, she pushed the door, and sure enough it was unlocked. There was a guy sitting at the front desk, his hair was dyed red on the tips, and shaved up the sides into a Mohawk. He lifted his head upon her entering, Mavis bit her bottom lip, they didn’t tell me this man was fine as hell, she thought to herself.

“How can I help you?”

“Umm I was told y’all take walk-ins?” She asked, a little unsure with the information her two best friends had given her. He stood up from his seat revealing that he himself was covered in tattoos. His arms were covered from his wrist all the way to his shoulders in something she recognized as tribal tattoos from her cousin.

“Depends on who told you that.”

Mavis couldn’t help but roll her eyes, she quickly lost her patience. “If I told you the boogie man would you believe me?”

“No, because the boogie man not real, now you’re a liar.”

“Boy! Do you take walk ins or not?” She snapped at him, her hand on her hip, and her other arm occupied by her purse. The mysterious tattooed man eyed Mavis up and down taking her in.

“Depends on who told you that.” He repeated again, this time speaking slower.

“Ugh, my friends from work did, what does that matter?”

“What’s their name?” He asked, Mavis paused for a second, she could have replied with a smart answer, but she didn’t feel like standing there and arguing any longer.

“Ugh, Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan, you know them or something?

“Liv and Rhea? Why didn’t you just say that, c’mon back.” He smiled brightly showing his gold and diamond grillz, his had did a complete one eighty as if his attitude from earlier never desisted

Mavis didn’t argue, she figured if he knew her girls, and her girls knew him there’s nothing to worry about. Her eyes wandered around the room as he got things set up, it’s not like she hasn’t been to a tattoo show before, she has her own tattoo lady back in Huston. “My name is Joshua, but you can call me Jey, what can I do for you sweetheart?” He asked sweetly, he sat on a stool across from her, his gaze focused.

“I'm Mavis.” She grew quiet suddenly feeling shy, she crossed one leg over the other, then pulled out her phone. “I was actually trying to decide between these three, but I couldn’t decide.” She admitted sheepishly, she felt bad for not coming with a definitive choice, but that’s what happens when you procrastinate.

Jey scooted closer to me, “Show me what you got.” His eyes watched Mavis as she scrolled through her phone, he couldn’t help but linger on her mouth as she chewed on her bottom lip nervously. Her long, curly, honey-blonde hair looked like a lion's mane the way it fanned out around her head, and framed her face.

“Okay so there’s this one, it’s from this anime, Naruto—

“That’s the one.” Jey said confidently, he nodded his head approving the choice immediately. He grinned seeing the confusion on Mavis’ face, Jey’s been tattooing for fifteen plus years, and he's good at matching art pieces to his clients.

“But you haven’t even seen the other two.” She argued lightheartedly, ever so the overthinker, Mavis didn’t wanna ink something on her body that she’d regret later.

Jey’s voice cut through the noise in her head, “trust me, your body shape is perfect for something like this.” He insisted as he eyes trailed over the soft curves of the space between her rib cage, and hips. She came dressed for the occasion in a cropped top that stopped a few inches below her chest, the rest of her torso was exposed.

Mavis thought about it for a moment, then Liv and Rhea popped into her head, well Liv and Rhea’s been going to him for a while so since they trust him…she thought to herself. A feeling of excitement washed over her, “okay let’s do it.” She clapped excitedly, and automatically went to lay down on bed on her back.

[dailynyarinder]

wakey wakey

Is someone home?

HI GUYS MOD HERE IM SO SORRY

Another quick Daily Nyarinder coming soon! Plus… a challenge? 👀

An explanation for my absence + details on an upcoming Daily Nyarinder event under the cut!!

So kinda personal bt my therapist left her practice unexpectedly so I got off my adhd and depresso meds at the same time as I was moving to another house and I just… really lost steam and haven’t had the energy to work on this project orz

i love cotl with all my heart! But my main fandom is svsss (shout out to kamkamquats on twt, this blog was inspired by their dailybingpup!! 💖) and trying to move all my shit over from twitter to bluesky so it doesn’t feed Elon Musk’s ai has also taken a lot of energy that would have been spent drawing for both cotl and svsss.

Additionally, last time I checked this blog I got some anon asks trying to pull me into fandom wank. The admin of this account is a grown adult with a spouse, a house, community protests to organize/attend, cosplays to make, a startup business to take care of; online fandoms are my comfort place and have been since I was 13, and as such I resolved years ago to stay away from fandom drama and just do what makes me happy. I’m really used to how chill and sweet svsss fandom is, so it was kinda startling to remember that younger fandoms are very drama-prone. I deleted those messages, but it still left a sour taste in my mouth whenever I came back to this blog.

As such, I’ve been on a break. And I probably will continue this hiatus until things settle on bluesky and I can spend more time on my friend’s cotl discord server to get my motivation back.

-

THAT SAID, I hope to do a little daily nyarinder art challenge for anyone who still follows this blog! Instructions and rules will be posted separately later today, but the idea is thus:

“YOU, dear reader, are just as wonderful, creative, and capable an artist as any cultist here. What do YOU want to see in Daily Nyarinder’s escapades? Pick up a craft and get creating! Use whatever you’ve got—whether it’s a fancy tablet, ibispaint on a touchscreen phone (that’s how dailynyarinder has been made so far 👀), a pen and the back of a receipt, needle and thread, hook and yarn, scrapbooking paper and scissors, a word doc and a keyboard, a camera, etc etc etc. Whatever medium brings you joy and renews your belief in our benevolent God of Death, this humble Narinder blog calls upon you to make and share a Daily Nyarinder post of your own!

Skill level doesn’t matter in the face of creativity. Whether you’re a renowned oil painter, a fanfic author, a newbie artist, or a kid who just really likes cats, all offerings are encouraged and welcome!

As for content rules, the Nyarinderverse is full of strange and unusual things; anything goes! HOWEVER, since this is a sfw blog and is followed by lots of minors, I’ll ask that if anyone participating decides to draw nsfw content, please make sure it is appropriately tagged and locked behind some sort of link—whether it’s a link to twitter, privatter, or elsewise. Any NSFW that isn’t hidden from immediate view will not be reblogged on this blog. If and when I reblog potential nsfw content, it will be tagged “NSFW” BY ME BY AS WELL so that my followers can filter it out if they need.

Any characters, ships, potential squicks or triggers, etc should be tagged appropriately.

Please know that this blog will never, EVER harass or condone/encourage harassment based on what you make, but as the mod I retain the right to not reblog works that squick me out personally. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t make them; it just means they might not all appear here.

Works may be posted separately under the hashtag #DailyNyarinderChallenge or submitted to this blog!

Finally, and most importantly, HAVE FUN!”

^^^ the challenge text will be reposted with some promotional artwork later, but does this sound like it would be a fun event? Let me know what you think.

Look forward to the resolution of the current daily nyarinder arc this week! But then I’ll likely go back on break again until things settle. 💖🐈‍⬛

[seresinhangmanjake]

Beyond the Hills: Part 4

Jake Seresin x Reader (College AU)

Main Masterlist, Beyond the Hills Masterlist

Summary: Technically, you and Jake Seresin have known each other for twelve years. All throughout your childhood education, you and Jake shared classes, lunch periods, homeroom teachers. It seemed if the opportunity for you to be in the same space arose, the universe made it happen. But you were not friends. Not enemies, either. Not much of anything to one another outside of the occasional class project partners. When high school ended you assumed you wouldn’t be seeing him any time soon, but then you find yourselves at the same college, and once again, forced together. It seems no matter where you go, Jake Seresin is there. But you are not the shy girl you were in your youth. You want to try things now; party, have fun, do things you’ve never done before, and suddenly, for reasons you don’t understand, Jake seems to take issue with your new choices.

Notes/warnings: just cursing, I think. Likely typos. I know people literally just voted for the second part of the Oh, Baby AU to be posted next, but this was almost done and I got a sudden burst of inspiration to finish it.

Words: 1300

---

“So are we going to talk about why you’re being weird or are we ignoring it or…what’s the plan here?”

Jake was trying to drown out the noise—the hundreds of jumbling thoughts in his head, each containing a question that led to the same answer: He liked you. He wanted you; enough to have the prickling sensation rise over his skin that said it might even be more than that. He couldn’t deny how he sought you out, catching himself walking to the campus coffee shop he knew you frequented, or considering attending the senior art exhibit because Lydia had mentioned you’d be there. Maybe it was because he needed you, in some way. He didn’t want to need you, and unlikely was it that you wanted to be needed by a man you barely knew, but he couldn’t stop himself. It was a craving. A yearning for something sweet and gentle and wholly unique, unlike anything else. And that’s exactly what you were. Unlike anything else. Special.

“Not answering me is only adding to the weirdness,” Rooster said, snapping his fingers from across the room, hoping the high-pitched sound might draw his roommate’s attention. “Did you hear me?”

Jake finally raised his forearm from his face where it had been resting to block the light from the sun, and sat up in his bed. His heavy inhale was a relief, as if he hadn’t been breathing quite right and just didn’t realize it until he made the conscious effort. 

“I heard you,” Jake said, running a hand through his hair to straighten the locks ruffled by his pillow.

“Oh, so you were just being a dick,” Rooster huffed. 

“Well, maybe don’t ask questions you already know the answers to.”

“How was I supposed to know if you wanted to talk about it or not?” Rooster moved to his own bed, plopping down and leaning forward with his elbows resting atop his knees. He clasped his hands and his thumbs began a little war with one another. “I guess I won’t ask if this behavior has anything to do with her, then.”

Jake nodded and snatched his t-shirt off the floor, pulling it over his head. “Would be a waste of a question.”

The shake of Rooster’s head in response irritated Jake immensely, but he knew where the reaction was coming from, and it wasn’t exactly…unfair. “It’s been a week since the bar, man, and you haven’t made a single move,” Rooster said. It was just short of a scolding, forcing Jake to roll his eyes. “Not even a step.”  

“I know.”

“Not even an ant-sized step. I mean, snails move faster than you. Snails, Jake.”

“I know,” Jake groaned. “I just—” He matched Rooster’s position but let his face fall into his hands, rubbing them up and down to try to erase the tight knitting of his features. “I think I’m going crazy." His words were muffled into his palms, then he lifted his head to meet his friend’s stare. “No, I know I am. I’m fucking insane, actually. I’m practically addicted to this girl and I don’t even really know her.”

“You keep saying that, but maybe you do.”

Jake’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “What?”

“You’ve always noticed her,” Rooster said. “She’s been in your classes for years. You know some of the things she likes, and what might make her laugh. You know that she’s embarrassed when the rain turns her hair frizzy, but you think it’s cute anyway. You know that…” He paused to remember another of many on the list of reasons. “You know she really likes strawberry-flavored things. And you know—”

"This is making me sound like a creep. How do you even know all of that?”

“You spilled it after a few drinks the other night," Rooster replied, smirking at the memory. “Look, all I’m saying is that you’ve unintentionally gathered a lot of information over the last twelve years. Putting all of that together,” Rooster shrugged, “Of course you like her. Hell, before Lyd wrapped me around her little finger even I was getting ready to like her and all I knew about her was that she’s beautiful. You know much more. So cut yourself some slack. She’s clearly a hard girl not to like.”

Understatement, Jake thought. Severe understatement. Rooster had a point Jake couldn’t deny. He had noticed so much about you—more than perhaps reasonable—and the truth was he had all the tools and knowledge to bring a smile to your face any time he wanted to. So why hadn’t he? Why had he restrained himself, and why did he still feel the itch to continue doing so?

You aren’t good enough for her, his thoughts intruded. That’s why. She deserves someone who won’t—

“Ok, why don’t you just say it out loud?” Rooster said. “You know, release it from that bottled-up, guarded portion of your heart.” 

Jake knew the look on his face was suggesting his roommate was nothing short of ridiculous, but Rooster didn’t budge. 

“Go on,” he urged.

The blond’s brows dipped in the center, mildly insulted. But that’s what happens when someone pinpoints one of the few things you’d rather not discuss. And it was harder knowing Rooster of all people was so easily able to do the pinpointing. The man’s brain was consistently on partying or Lydia, partying with Lydia, sex with Lydia, sex with Lydia at a party—Lydia, Lydia, Lydia—and still he had enough room in his head to sense Jake’s walls. He wasn’t intimidated by them, either. Despite how sturdy, how thick and long those walls of Jake’s were, Rooster had no issue walking right up to them, rapping on the carefully stacked stone with determined knuckles, and declaring, without any hint of gentle sympathy, that his friend was being an idiot. 

Maybe he was being an idiot. 

“My heart is not guarded,” Jake defended…weakly. 

Rooster's look easily proved how unconvinced he was. But maybe Jake wasn’t truly trying to be convincing. It felt like lying to his father after a night getting high with his best friend back in high school. Useless. Pointless. His father could smell the weed cloud wrapped around his son, and any following words from Jake’s lips fell on deaf ears. 

“Fine,” Jake muttered, his heart jackrabbiting against his ribcage. He was thankfully for that cage. It kept the organ from breaking free from his body like it felt it was on the verge of doing. Jake pushed on. He pushed through the thumping in his ears “I…I like her.”

“And all was well.”

“Shut up.”

Rooster clicked his tongue as he shook his head. “So touchy. Let’s hope if you two get together she soothes that grumpiness.”

“I’m not grumpy," Jake lightly snapped. If said by Rooster a minute earlier, Jake would have been harsher, but the weight of his confession was lighter than the denial he’d been holding on to. He suddenly found himself less angry. Less tense. “I’ve been conflicted for weeks and it’s exhausting.”

Jake would’ve said more. The relief of letting it out—however initially reluctant—coaxed him to spill more of his secrets. The tale of his past was ready to tumble off his tongue. But there was a knock at the door.

“It’s unlocked, baby,” Rooster called. 

The smile Rooster greeted his girl with whenever she entered a room fell instantly at the sight of her face. The confident woman he knew didn’t worry her lip between her teeth. She didn’t wring her hands. And yet, in that very moment, she was doing just that.

Rooster rushed her way. "Lyd, what's wrong?"

She released that lip; ran her fingers through shiny platinum strands. Her sigh filled the silence in the room, then she said, "We've got a problem, gang."

---

A/N: I hope you liked it :) It’s painfully long overdue, and I apologize to those who had an attachment to the series. I genuinely didn’t think many people wanted it. I’m actually really happy and thankful that you guys encouraged me to continue this. Just a little tidbit: “I’m practically addicted to this girl and I don’t even really know her” was the line this series was built around. I thought it would be fun to mention. 

tags: @wkndwlff @kmc1989 @sagittarius-flowerchild @dempy @oliviah-25 @rosiahills22 @xoxabs88xox @matisse556 @hardballoonlove @ssa-sadboi @lynnevanss @pono-pura-vida @tgmreader @amgluvsbooks @ravenhood2792 @djs8891 @shakespeareanwannabe @sailor-aviator @novagreen04 @memeorydotcom

[aristocratic-otter]

Welp, I wasn't going to post today...but then I realized that the final chapter of Heart in the Well will go up before Sunday, and that'll render the excerpt I carefully picked out obsolete by then. So I scrambled to pick bits from my other stories just so I could post this one excerpt. Go me!

The good news about Heart being done? I've got a new WIP plotted out that I'm super excited about, but I wouldn't let myself write anything until one of my WIPs finished. So next week or the week after, you should see the first words from that fic, a very very angsty Watford era canon divergence.

In the mean time, thank you to : @monbons, @messofthejess, @rimeswithpurple, @thehoneyedhufflepuff, @best--dress,

@nausikaaa, @youarenevertooold, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @artsyunderstudy, @j-nipper-95, and

@facewithoutheart for the tags over the last two weeks. I'm having so much fun reading and watching your stories and art. This is such an incredibly talented fandom, it's endlessly inspiring. Plus, I get to meet some of you soon when I see Rainbow in August!

Here's my teasers for this week:

Here’s one from each of my official WIPs

From Saving Simon Snow: 

I shake my head now, thinking about it. I’ll just have to keep close to Simon, or at least, as close as he’ll allow me. At least my vampire anatomy gives me an advantage there; I can listen to what’s happening with Simon from three rooms away (I won’t, unless it’s a matter of his safety. It’s a gross invasion of his privacy otherwise) (fortunately, I had to learn to tune out the chatter of my peers by my 2nd year at Watford, or I would have gone mad). 

From the Heart in the Well

He looks back at me and then frowns. “Well, come on then,” he says, impatiently. 

“Come on, what?” I say, exasperated. The water’s up to my breastbone now, and I’m starting to feel a little panicky, so my voice comes out higher pitched than I’d like. 

Now, he rolls his eyes. “I need your tie,” he says as if it were obvious. It was not obvious. “Take it off, please.” At that, I shiver a little. I never thought there’d be a day where Simon Snow would be telling me to take off my clothes.

From Snow Fox: Penny, learning you can’t go home again (especially if you’ve signed on with the Snow Fox)

I step onto the road and walk briskly towards the house I grew up in. I can tell when I’ve been noticed. Several heads swivel my direction, and the murmur of conversation in the camp ceases. I keep on as if I haven’t noticed however. As I draw closer, I nod distractedly at some of the boys nearer to my path. They don't nod back. They’re watching me with narrowed eyes and I shudder internally. What do they see when they look at me?

From TikTok Dancer: Quite a bit racier than what I usually post, but still Tumblr legal, I think

Years from now, if I, for some odd reason, try to explain how my first time having sex felt, I won’t be able to. There’s no describing it.  I’m planning to get a degree in words, for fuck’s sake, but right now, all language has left me, sailed back to England probably. I’m left with caveman grunts and desperate whines. Every particle of sensation in my body has gathered between my legs, and every atom of will I have left is devoted to an attempt to meld my body with his. I’ve almost succeeded–we’re nearly one creature now, moving in frantic, panting unison. 

From Stars, Flowers, and Children,

I know he’s been looking for me. I know he’s probably forgiven my great sin. He shouldn’t. Forgiveness requires that the person who receives it is contrite, is sorry for what they’ve done. 

I’m not sorry. I’d do it again today, if the circumstances were the same. 

Even being estranged from the only person in this world that I care about is still better than the permanent separation that would result if we were rescued. 

I believe that we’ll be friends again someday. Some day when the pain in my chest and stomach have dulled. And that day is worth waiting for.

From Cupid’s Shield:

I’m left gaping at where he just stood. It’s suddenly clear to me how much of his vampire abilities Baz has been hiding, because I was looking right at him. 

I never saw him move. 

All I know is suddenly he’s above me, and my arms are above my head and prisoned to the bed by his hands clamped around my wrists. I’m so stunned that I don’t even struggle. 

His knees are on either side of my hips, and he’s staring down at me like I’m his next meal. 

From my COBB project:

I know I should be worrying over tomorrow, and what my team will face out there. And I will be worrying over that—tomorrow. Tonight, I’m far more worried about the hours ahead. Hours of, once again, sharing a room with the only man I’ve ever loved. A man who’s never looked at me as anything other than a posh prick. 

That’s my fault, of course. It could have been different, all those years ago, when we first met at Watford Uni. I was excited, back then, to meet my roommate. Excited, and nervous. I freely admit I’ve had a privileged upbringing, and this would be the first time I’d ever shared a room. 

My childhood was mostly lonely, so I didn’t mind the idea. I’d thought it’d be nice to always have someone nearby to talk to. 

Of course, everyone knows how that turned out.

As others have said recently, please let me know if you no longer want to be tagged and I'll take you off of my tag list. Unless I hear otherwise, I assume you're like me, and like to hear from people even if you're not feeling like sharing yourself.

Tags and cheers to: @chen-chen-chen-again-chen, @bazzybelle, @dragoneggos, @erzbethluna, @palimpsessed,

@frjsti, @fatalfangirl, @letraspal, @martsonmars, @melodysmash,

@moments-au-crayon22, @moodandmist, @mostlymaudlin, @onepintobean, @raenestee,

@tea-brigade, @upuntil6am, @whogaveyoupermission, @carryonsimoncarryonbaz, @krisrix,

@shemakesmeforget, @confused-bi-queer, @nightimedreamersghost,  @thewholelemon, @angelsfalling16,

@noblecorgi, @hushed-chorus, @whatevertheweather, @ivelovedhimthroughworse, @mooncello,

@wellbelesbian, @ic3-que3n, @shrekgogurt, @cosmicalart,  @cutestkilla,

@theearlgreymage, @alexalexinii, @prettygoododds, @blackberrysummerblog, @bookish-bogwitch,

@Iamamythologicalcreature, @emeryhall, @larkral, @ileadacharmedlife, @thewholelemon 

[shuniverse]

don’t talk ,, b.c

🧷 requested by anon !! hope I did ur ask justice 🫶 also, requested tag for @mimussyy !!

🎐 family issues and angst ;; lots of cursing/swearing ;; hurt/comfort ;;

;;

“baby you should really try talking to em again.”

he refers to your family, with whom you haven’t spoken to in ages.

your mother, especially.

as a child, and as an adolescent, your mother was never someone you turned to.

always shunning you, turning you away when you need help with something, any sort of guidance.

but when she did give you attention? it was always to degrade you, tell you you’re clothes, hair, interests, the things you wished to pursue in life, that they were all stupid and ridiculous, that they would never get anywhere in life.

you didn’t think of them again until you saw a post your mother made of your parents on a trip with your siblings. it had filled you with a sense of jealousy and sadness, which your ever so observant boyfriend noticed.

“chris.. you know how they treated me. they made me not wanna LIVE. I can’t exactly forgive all they did.”

“baby girl, I know they’re bad, but maybe they’ve matured now, maybe now that they see how successful you are, maybe they’ll understand, and want to rekindle the relationship.”

you sigh, looking up at your boyfriend from where he’s standing next to you on your barstool. “channie, I don’t think that’s such a good idea..”

he pouts slightly, resting his chin on your shoulder. “c’mon baby, please? for me? and hey, I’ll be here if it goes south, alright?”

you lean your head on his, and he plants a kiss on your cheek.

“alright,” you start, much to your internal protest, “I’ll do it.”

;;

much to your surprise, you find yourself in your car on your way to your parents home.

you groan to yourself. that handsome guy you call your boyfriend is sure as hell lucky you love him.

stopping in a parking spot close to his house, you throw your head back against the headrest with a thunk.

I’m really doing this.

jesus, chan. you’re one pretty guy. lucky for you.

you huff, undo your seatbelt, grab your bag and keys, and get out of the car, and walk the longer-than-you-thought distance to the front door.

with what feels like sloth speed, you move your finger to the doorbell.

you wait, until finally, after what feels like ages, your father opens the door.

he gives a small smile.

you give a nervous smile in return, and a small wave. “hey dad.”

“hey, kid. long time no see.”

he opens the door wider, to let you in.

you chuckle. “yeah, been a while, hasn’t it?”

your father gives a short laugh, and you stop as you see your mother in the kitchen, seeming to make good. she hasn’t noticed you yet, as if she ever wanted to.

but you set your past aside for the time being, and walk to the kitchen island.

you take a deep breath, and speak to the woman who made your life feel like hell for 17 years for the first time in three years.

“hey, mom.”

she halts her hand chopping on the board, and turns to look at you, her eyes widening.

“oh.. hey, hun.”

you share a stare at each other for what feels like eternity, before your father snaps you out of your state.

“hey, uh, we got snacks ready. you want some snacks kiddo?”

you nod, looking at your father with a small smile.

you sit together on the couch, making small talk and watching tv while munching on some snacks.

until, you feel the mood ruin.

your mother steps into the room, holding bowls of pasta.

macaroni to be specific.

fuck. that’s your favorite.

she hands you a bowl with a tight lipped smile, and hands a bowl to your father with an accompanied kiss to his head.

she sits in between the two of you to eat her own noodles.

it’s awkward silence now, neither one of you knowing what to say.

until your mother opens her mouth.

“so, uh, how are you, hun?”

you turn to look at her. “I’m fine, mom.”

“how, uh.. has your life been? what do you do?”

“well, I have a boyfriend and we’ve been together for four years, I’m working in the art industry and making good money, and-“

“art? see, I told you that wouldn’t get anywhere.”

god. not even a minute in?

“it’s getting me places, mom, and I said I’m making good money, my boyfriend makes good money too and he’s actually the leader of a band-“

she cuts you off with a laugh. “a band? huh, never knew you went for downgrades.”

this only fueled your anger. you couldn’t help but raise your voice. “mom, he’s anything but a downgrade. he takes care of me, he’s super sweet and probably the most handsome and caring guy I’ve ever known.”

she scoffs. “I bet it’s just so he can fuck you, that’s all guys want. especially from sluts.”

your eyes widen. “what the fuck did you call me?”

your dad looks at you wearily. “kid..”

“no!” you practically yell, and swivel your attention back to your mother. “god you are such a bitch. you were NEVER there for me, you always degraded my shit, you NEVER made me feel welcome in my own fucking home. I never felt like I could talk to you, but you expected so much from me. why? so you could use me as a slave? as someone to lean your troubles on? that I never fucking wanted? I knew coming here was a bad idea. you just can’t keep your damn mouth shut about me can you?”

she gawps at you, before standing up and huffing. “I don’t see what the problem is. we both know you’ll end up coming back in the end, you’ve always needed me, you’ve never been one to cut people off.”

“like you know! you were never fucking there for me! y’know what? fuck you. fuck you and your bullshit words when we know full well that I’m more successful than you, that I don’t fucking need you. I’m so done with this, im so done with YOU.”

“you don’t mean that.”

“yes, I fucking do. fuck you mom. dad?”

he looks at you, not knowing what to say.

“I advise divorcing her before it’s too late.”

and with that, you give your mom one final look, before stomping towards the front door, grabbing your shit and getting ready to leave, before you feel a hand grip your arm, you turn your head.

it’s your mother.

“if you leave, you’re never coming back.”

“good. have a nice life, bitch.”

you release your arm from her grip, and walk out the front door, and slam it shut, walking to your car and immediately pulling out and driving home.

on the way there, your rage turns to stress, and tears start slowly streaming down your face.

as soon as you pull into the parking lot of your apartment, you trudge up your stairs and barge through the door, making your boyfriend flinch from his spot on the couch.

“oh hey love what’s-“ as soon as he sees you with tears falling down your face, he gives a sympathetic smile and stands up, opening his arms. “c’mere princess.”

you rush into his arms, practically jumping on him, and he sits down, holding you in his arms as you sob into his neck.

he sighs sadly, kissing your neck as your body wracks itself with sobs and cries.

he runs his fingers through your hair, and finally, after what feels like forever, you lift your head up, and sniffle.

chan gives you a sad smile, gently caressing your cheek with his thumb. “baby.. what happened?”

you pout, holding onto his forearm as you recall what happened. he listens to your words intently, leaving kisses on your hand as he watches you with kind eyes.

he sighs once more. “my love, I’m so sorry.. I shouldn’t have made you go see them.”

you shake your head. “it’s ok, it’s not like you knew my own mother would call me a slut.”

he gives a sad pout. “why would she even call you that?”

“well, I told her about you and how great you are, and she basically said I was only with you for sex, especially sluts, gesturing towards me.”

“aw, baby I bet she’s just jealous you have better and more sex than she does.”

you giggle. “yea, bet she’s mad you’re hot and dick me down like she’s never felt.”

he shakes his head, gently rubbing your waist. “you’re silly, baby girl.”

you kiss his forehead. “so are you, channie.”

he gently cups your face, and you lean forward as he catches your lips in a gentle kiss, and you lovingly sigh, wrapping your arms around him.

he pulls away after a bit. “my pretty baby.”

you giggle again, kissing his nose. “can we take a shower, channie? I’m tired.”

he kisses your shoulder. “of course, baby girl.”

he stands up, holding you as he walks to the bathroom.

you sigh against his shoulder.

he may be a lucky guy, but you’re even luckier.

;; 🫶

AHHH THIS TOOK ME SO LONG AGDHHDHE

hope you enjoyed!

[lmkobsessedmoth]

LGBTQ hot line

Welcome to the woods of the moth man. This post shall be an introduction ish thing for new people and for people who need a refresher (please note I’ll be adding more to this post as time goes on and I reveal more about my au and introduce new characters)

🌙About me💫

Hi I’m Loyd/the moth man

I’m a nonbinary trans man (pronouns they/him) and I would appreciate that you use my preferred pronouns when talking to me

I love answering questions so don’t be afraid to send me asks (unless you’re going to ask me something invasive or to draw your oc) 

I love interacting with people and answering their questions but please do not message me without my permission. I have social anxiety so I would appreciate it if you sent your messages to my ask box

I’m not in a lot of fandoms but I do like monkey kid, arcane, murder drones, fnaf, gacha life/club and avatar the last air bender

Here’s what my sona looks like (I haven’t drawn a full reference for them yet)

About my art

I’m an artist and storyteller who loves to share ideas and random scenarios through their artwork

I’ve been drawing for almost 5 years and have been an lmk fan artist for half of that time which my style makes obvious 

The only social media I post my art on is tumblr and discord (I use it post my art and twitter and koo but I stopped for a few reasons). If you see my art on any other platforms please report the account as that’s not me 

I do requests but only regarding the lmk show and my fan au. Please do not ask me to draw your ocs as I can’t do that with how my mind works

If you want to make fan art of my oc’s or au that is completely fine just credit and ping me, I would love to see it

I do not do art trades so don’t ask me about those

Do not trace or repost my art on other platforms. I’ve spent years working on my art skills and would rather people see my art through reblogs and links to my posts rather then someone taking my work and putting it on their social media with credit or not 

People who I don’t want to interact with (tw, mention of problematic shipping and bigotry)

Pro shippers and people who support problematic ships that contain things like incest or pedophilia will not be supported on my account or in my community

Racists, homophobs and general bigotry. Reality Can suck and I want this blog to be a break from that so if you think that people who are just living their lives as who they are is bad then this isn’t the community for you

Ai bros. Ai is cool for something’s but not for replacing people like artists and writers. I do not consent to having my work be used in ai at any point in time

Art “fixers” and people who generally change a characters design, race or body type to “fix” them aren’t supported here as it only hurts the artist who made the original art that gets changed to fit an agenda (redesigning a character for fun is fine)

You’re under the age of 12 to 13. My art and scenarios can deal with some serious topics that aren’t suitable for young children and personally I don’t feel comfortable talking to very young children

✨Information of my lmk au🌙

The death au (place holder name) is about mk and the gang finally getting a chance to breathe and get used to the new world after the events of seasons 3 through 5, that is until spirits start seeping into the mortal realm and mk got dreams about past events mostly lost to time. Mk being the hero he is try’s to deal with the spirits alone but his efforts (and nightmares) don’t go unnoticed for long as macaque agreed to teach him more about spirits and how to not summon 1 that will destroy the city

✨Oc’s included in the death au🌙

Ren Yu ling

Diedie

Bendy

The bard monkey

The king of the north

The mystery maiden

The lady

✨Bonus Oc’s🌙

The tiny dragon

The assistant

[ppenguinpperson]

cardiomyocytes and connective tissue @nopanamaman

I’ve wanted to do a fic like this for some time now, a ‘thank you’ letter to PAFL and its community of sorts. I’m happy I finally got around to writing it:) 

I wasn’t sure whether I should do this or not, but, hey! It might make someone feel a bit better!! Or, reading the fic will. That’s enough reason, I think, and you don’t have to read this, of course, no matter who you are.

First of all, I want to talk about PAFL a bit.

The first PAFL song I listened to was PiP. I saw its thumbnail when listening to some other music youtube, and so, I listened to it. Oh boy am I glad I did:) I remember thinking how cool it is that someone's making songs for their OCs and that people are interested in them. I could see so much love for the characters in it. I was so happy when I discovered there were more songs like that!! This was around when Comfort Zone had first come out, a week or two after at most. That was two years ago. I’ve been obsessed ever since.

I love PAFL. I genuinely love that songs haven’t been coming out much lately. Like, there’s media that comes out weekly and sucks shit. I’m glad Ferry is taking their time with this!!! Even if all we get each year is one song, that’s cool, because the community is wonderful and we also get doodles and art and now patreon stuff.. yippee yay… !!! And even if we didn’t. who the fuck caressss!!!!! I love coming up with AUs and OCs and theorizing with my friends!!! the time between songs gives us time to do all that:)

The characters are so charming. Every member of the cast has been a fave of mine at some point or another. They’re all so, real! I love them! I love how they fuck up and I love how they get fucked over and I love how they get exploded and killed and shot and hugged and saved and helped!!! They’re human… might not make sense, but i rlly do like them…

It’s so neat looking back at older songs and seeing how stuff’s changed. The art style, the music, it’s all so nice to look back on. Even if I wasn’t there for it.

And don’t even get me started on the worldbuilding..  Everyone say thank you to Boris Strugackij and Arkadij Strugackij for making roadside picnic and inspiring Ferry to make this… so lovely and neat. wonderful. I have not read it myself, but I might, just to be able to make my own pafl OCs more swagger..

So. This fic.

I can’t mention two years ago without at least mentioning my depression.

I can’t remember most of last year, speaking truthfully. Parts of 2021 are also fuzzy. Depression and anxiety are terrible, would not recommend. This feels cheesy to say, but it does get better!!! Slowly, unsteadily, it gets better!!! I don’t mean for this part of the post to be a ‘feel bad for me’ thing at all. Do not. I am safe and healthy now and I couldn’t be happier to be here right now.

Is life good now?? Sorta, but what matters to me right now is, I’m happy!!! It feels so surreal. I never thought I’d be like this. A part of me wants to be angry, to get depressed again about how I could have been happy all this time. But I won’t!!! Because then I’d spiral and forget another year, and, I don’t want that!

Which is so cool!!! I can like, fucking, do stuff now!! I can throw away the bad thoughts, embrace the good ones, encourage myself!!! I do things!!! I go outside and goddd dude that’s so good!! I go outside!!!

I’m doing stuff! I’m drawing, writing, cleaning my room, taking care of myself!!! If I didn’t stay alive to enjoy these small joys, what am I even here for?? 

And I’m alive!!! I’m here!!! I made it, I’m here, writing this on 10th november, 2023, and I’m ALIVE!!!! How cool is that??? 

And yea, the world is shitty, it sucks ass, but, my friends don’t!!!:3 and that’s more than enough for me… SHOUT OUT TO MY FRIENDS!!! I LOVE YOU DUDES!!!

Moving on:

It doesn’t feel right to say that I’m here now only to PAFL. But, what I can say is that it’s been a wonderful crutch for me!! It’s been something to focus on, something silly, but also something I can relate to, and something that inspires me to make my own stuff! I’d most likely still be here, were it not for these silly songs.. but, not sure I’d be as alive as I am now! Unsure if my heart would feel right in my chest! And I wouldn’t have met my amazing friends!!!! Everyone here is so nice.

Dima may be a bit OOC in this fic, and that's because! This fic is based on my own experiences, which, i don’t think is bad…

I could talk here forever about how it gets better. Butttt to be quite honest I don’t wanna lol. I just wanna say, Thank you! to Parties are for Losers, for being cool. 

(Though I also wanna say, don’t put Ferry on a pedestal, they’re human, we all make mistakes, all that stuff.)

Ok time to go back to my manly Sergei ways and never talk about emotions ever again. or as anya would say: FUCK IT WE BALL!!!!!

[cow-rants]

Fair warning: this post is in regards to the recent Assassin’s Creed: Shadows trailer. I will talk about my thoughts and feelings regarding race. Thank you.

I’ve been a massive fan of Assassin’s creed (AC) since I first saw my uncle playing it at 7 or 8 years old. I’m a massive history buff and the idea of being able to experience the past through the eyes of an ancestor is such a brilliant idea. Not mention the concept of a secret war being fought through out the centuries is always fun. But as of late, I haven’t been really excited for a new entry. Odyssey was the last game I really played and it was alright, but I’m personally not a huge fan of the new RPG mechanics (although I do understand why they were implemented).

Valhalla looked interesting, but didn’t really feel like an AC game to me. So I put it on my “to play later” list. Mirage looked far better and I definitely do want to play it, but I honestly just haven’t felt a super big pull to pick it up. But when I saw that AC was finally going to Japan, I was ecstatic. I adore Japanese history in general and the Sengoku period is full of interesting conflicts and characters that would fit perfectly with the assassin’s and the templars.

Although they went with some pretty standard people to showcase, such as Oda Nobunaga, I still think they have a chance to do something really interesting story wise (of course, reserve all real judgement for the gameplay reveal. But I’m mainly just talking about the story). Especially with the portrayal of Yasuke. From what I could tell, it seems like his story will be one of disillusionment, possibly betrayal, and redemption. Certainly a story we’ve seen before, but it’s still interesting to see Yasuke in something as big as AC.

Before I get into the more unfortunate discourse regarding Yasuke, I absolutely have to talk about Naoe. See, what caught my eye about her was how she and my OWN AC OC have very similar stories. Well, I don’t know for sure. But they certainly share a similar experience, which is watching their families be butchered by Oda Nobunaga’s armies. It’s not much, but by the gods does it make me pretty happy. My OC’s name is Minori Kishimoto and she’s one of my favorites, so seeing a canon character with some similar traits is kind of exciting for me (okay, very exciting).

Anyhow, back to Yasuke. As soon as I saw the trailer, I knew I was going to see people saying something stupid. So I checked both the comments on the video and twitter. And I was certainly not mistaken. So so so many bad takes and ridiculous arguments that, honestly, only go to show either mild racism or straight up hatred toward African people. Not to mention the fact that they completely ignore Naoe as a protagonist. I guess she must be the greatest assassin of all time.

From what I understand, a lot of people are upset that for a Japan centered AC game, there is a black protagonist. Which, again, ignores Naoe entirely. The biggest argument I have heared against Yasuke being one of the protagonists is that he wasn’t actually a samurai. To which I say: False. Incorrect. Mistaken. Wrong. Factually incorrect.

The primary issue here is the fact that many people refer to him as a retainer. A title that he never officially held, as far as I’m aware, but even so that still makes him Samurai! Looking just at the facts of his life, he was respected by arguably the most powerful Daimyo of that time, earned his trust, received a pension, received a sword, and received property. So then the question becomes: what exactly makes a person a samurai at this time? Because I can tell you one thing, it isn’t noble blood.

A peasant man was once hired by Nobunaga to do a multitude of tasks, one of which was to hold his sandals. This man would soon prove himself to be capable of all of his tasks as well as in the art of war. He would become a powerful man and rise through the ranks until he held the rank of Taiko at the end of his life . That man was Toyotomi Hideyoshi.

If Hideyoshi’s story proves one thing, it’s that at this time anyone could rise to become a daimyo. So then, why wouldn’t Yasuke also be considered a samurai? We’re not even trying to claim he was a daimyo, just that he was a samurai. Retainer, bodyguard, slave, whatever. The fact is that the man was 10000% a samurai and was a respected one at that. To claim otherwise is to prove yourself ignorant in the history you claim to be proficient in, and incompetent at backing up your argument.

Not to mention that from a writing point of view, it’s a brilliant move. Yasuke was not super well recorded and thus is relatively unknown to others. Which makes him perfect for being a:

1. Fish out of water character

2. Real person, that can be treated written like a fictional one

All of this to say, I think that this newest Assassin’s Creed has a chance to become one of my personal favorites. As well as putting the series back on the map for many. But, with no gameplay and an already worrying pre-order package, I’m worried to say the least. Only time will tell, but I look forward to it.

[neptunedivine]

astro observations pt. iii

✧ pluto in aquarius, pisces in saturn, and the reprise of the independent artist (predictions) ✧

hi! I hope you’ve been doing well. I’ve been thinking a lot about Saturn lately and I wanted to talk about some observations and make some predictions with Saturn in Pisces transit.

✧ For context, Saturn rules over the signs Capricorn and Aquarius in traditional astrology (in modern astrology Aquarius is also ruled by Uranus). The planet carries out themes of structure, laws, restriction, discipline, responsibility, obligation, and ambition.

✧ Those with Saturn energy more prominent in their chart (for example as a cap/aqua rising or midheaven, in one’s personal planets, a heavily aspected Saturn, etc.) usually feel this weight of responsibility from Saturn often in the form of some karma (wishing you guys love). But usually, the people that do these placements dirty get a much mightier punch from karma than the placements.

✧ Everyone, however, will feel the effects of Saturn in their life most notably during the Saturn return when transiting Saturn returns to its original place in one’s natal chart every 28-32 years. If one puts in the work towards their Saturn placement, they will be rewarded. If not, one will be disciplined (so I’ve seen and heard — I haven’t had mine yet. For an amazing in-depth explanation, check out this post).

Okay, now that the foundation’s been laid, let’s dive in:

✧ Saturn has recently moved into Pisces. Since Pisces is ruled by Neptune and Neptune is associated with the entertainment industry (in terms of illusions and camera and music), I think the recording industry is in for some MAJOR karma. When Pluto was in Capricorn (which it will return to until it goes direct again back in Aquarius) the business side of the industry really choked out the music side. The focus of music as an art and a medium was thrown out for a machine of constantly churning out singles from artists and working them to death. Very money hungry too. However, when Pluto finally settles in Aquarius for good, I think things will shift in the artists’ favor.

✧ I think a lot of the corruption of the music industry will be aired out to the public, with maybe some changes in how the business side runs. The judicial system might get involved too. It has been for a little while now, with more bills in action for songwriters to be paid fairly and more as they are one of, if not the most underpaid people in the industry.

✧ In a way, justice is already coming in with the writer’s strike currently happening too. Aquarius rules change and rebellion, and Pisces can be seen in association with Hollywood. ✧ I also think the route of going independent will be the new normal for a lot of people. But lately, so many label artists have been dropping their labels to go independent to have more creative control over their music and what they put out. Honestly, to release more often too.

✧ For many artists, there are two options: signing to a label or going independent. Having the label’s backing used to be very beneficial, they could get you in rooms with artists, offer you a great push in promotion for your music, act as an in during award season — basically fund your entire career and set you up for success. But today, that isn’t the case. The labels these days are putting all the work on the artists to promote themselves, holding their music hostage if their views aren’t good enough. They offer little to no artist development and are fully dependent on the artist already having a great following before signing them. They’re signing influencers and not artists. Not to mention they take a majority of your earnings from your music as a way to pay them back, they see their artists as a loan, property. ✧ Now the alternative to this is going independent. Here an artist has no label so they’re in complete creative control of their music, and they don’t owe a big corporation money for freedom essentially. However, they don’t have the perks and ins as a signed artist, so it’s much harder to get into the right rooms, get promotions, etc.

✧ With Pluto in Aquarius and Saturn in Pisces, there’s a strong sense of rebellion, change, and individuality. People are getting sick and tired of the same kinds of artists these labels are putting out, it’s not good enough anymore. People are missing good music, music that makes you truly feel something. GOOD LYRICS GOOD GOD (I’m gonna try not to rant on that but when I tell you I’m so passionate about this it’s insane). Also, there are a lot of artists doing incredibly well making great music from the heart that makes people feel, on their own with no label backing.

✧ d4vd originally went viral for his song Romantic Homicide, but he made it in Bandlab singing his vocals into a pair of wired Apple earbuds. The quality wasn’t top tier, but it made people feel something; it felt raw, authentic, an “individual” experience millions could relate to. Now it’s his most streamed song sitting at 600+ million streams.

✧ I think Saturn will reward those who make true music from their soul, that makes them feel handsomely.

✧ I also think there will be a stronger emphasis on community and connections. I think artists will lean into make music with people they like and trust like friends instead of strangers hired by a label, because that’s what they’re more comfortable with.

✧ Also with the sense of community (Pluto in Aquarius), the same could be said for playlisting and music sources and going to new places to find new music instead of traditional radio — which i feel like is already happening. I personally don’t listen to the radio anymore (mind you I don’t have a car) but I don’t even listen to the Spotify editorial playlists either. I get 99 percent of my music recommendations from my TikTok algorithm.

✧ I don’t think the AI shit is going to take off. People freaked out about NFTs and virtual reality and no one says zip about those things now. I don’t think there will be a dip in these technologies but I don’t think they will wreck enough havoc to effect artists and other creatives. The entertainment industry at its core relies on people taking the human experience and making art from it. How can one do that if they are not human? Especially right now when I think Aquarius brings out a strong sense of authenticity and truth that will only be amplified when Saturn goes into Aries.

✧ There might be an increase of older artists in the music industry (25+ years old debuting). Saturn rewards those who put in the hard work and if an artist has been doing so for about 30 years towards being an artist, their reward may be being in the limelight.

✧ Someone else mentioned this in their post here and I wanted to bring it up because I found it so interesting. They mentioned that with Pluto in Aquarius the effects of Leo will also be amplified by Pluto bringing back the need for stars again — I agree with them so much. From my perspective, from now on I feel like being popular and looking pretty won’t be enough, you need to bring something to table. A little two-step or a tune? Please I’m starving. The Aquarian energy just screams for authenticity (I’m saying that word a lot yes I know) but I feel like this in tandem with Pisces’ need for a stronger connection and nothing surface level will really push out an urge for talent.

Alright that's all for right now. I’ll post more general

Saturn observations tomorrow.

see ya soon!