#i have some ideas from today that i want to illustrate as well so if you like this piece be ready
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slap to get battle boost
#'fight me!' 'ok.' proceeds to slap you in the face#the thought process was: wayne slaps while taking the glove off so why not toss it at them but at whom toss it........... 🧠💥pongorma💥🧠#im a simple creature and with a simple mind#hylics#dedusmuln#wayne hylics#somsnosa#pongorma#artstump#i have some ideas from today that i want to illustrate as well so if you like this piece be ready#!!! <- forgot the exclamation points! how could i .....
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Hii! I have two ideas I don’t mind if only one is written: Could you write head-canons or like anything about Inosuke with a s/o whose love language is physical touch? Or could you write head-canons about Inosuke with an artist gf who maybee has a whole book with drawings of him 🤭🤭? Whatever is easiest tysm!!
⋆˙ inosuke with an artist s/o who loves physical touch !! ⟡♡ headcanons / fluff
gender neutral
omg hi anon !! and yes ofc i can :)) im making this whole thing gender neutral but i can do a separate fic of inosuke with an artist gf and he find out she’s been drawing him since the very start and how he reacts if you’d like ?? anywho, enjoy !! <3
the cuties song -> www.spotify.com
- inosuke and you have a pretty stable relationship tbh
- considering the fact he’s a feral boar man
- since you two have been together, you haven’t noticed inosuke having any hobbies
- like at all besides screaming and challenging people (and sleeping…) (…aaannndddd eating)
- but hey! that’s fine! you have yours and inosuke has… his
- now anywho, you were waking up bright and early for another day of training
- when suddenly you didn’t feel the crushing weight of inosuke on you…
- (he always sleeps on you and waits until you wake up! but today he wasn’t… oh god.)
- “inosuke? inosuke!”
- he had been rummaging around in your things while you were asleep !!!
- you rush over to him and jump on top of him to hide what he might’ve saw
- he lets you take him down and looks at you
- he’s doing that weird gawking giddy thing he does whenever he’s happy
- you just stare back at him
- “what?”
- “WHAT IS THIS BOOK?!”
- he holds up a sketchbook, filled to the brim with drawings of him
- you FREAK OUT
- “inosuke!! this is private stuff!!”
- “so?”
- mans does NOT know privacy
- yalls relationship is a one way street for that matter and he sticks to it.
- so he is veerrryyy adamant about seeing the rest of what’s in that book
- finally, you give in and let him look at it
- he’s amazed by the cool illustrations and doodles you’ve made for him
- “these are me?!”
- “yeah…”
- *cue him flipping through them aggressively*
- “i want this one!”
- “inosuke you can’t just take them! well— i mean maybe you can but i don’t want you to!! i spent a long time drawing these—..”
- “i don’t care!”
- “okay. insouke— seriously..!!”
- once he starts ripping some of the pages you snatch the book
- he tries to fight you but realizes you’re being serious so he stops but is still agitated
- he wants them!!
- now, onto physical touch
- honestly i wouldn’t see him having a problem with it, it’d probably just stroke his ego more knowing he’s got a pretty partner like you by his side caressing his arm while he boasts about how he’s the “king of the mountains”
- a real “i’m on top of the world” moment fr
- but he did kind of freak out when you touched him for the first time
- you were walking through the butterfly mansion, on the way to see inosuke
- you two had planned a little first date type-thing
- (with the help from tanjiro and zenitsu..)
- but you were happy and couldn’t wait to go and see him!!
- once you got there he wasn’t dressed up, just in his casual attire
- no clothes..
- anyway, you walk up to him and touch his shoulder
- he turns around so fast screaming “WHO THE HELL JUST TOUCHED ME?!”
- realized it was you and just stared
- the skin to skin contact got him feeling some typa way
- and ever since then you’ve just been doing the same thing you always do
- “hey inosuke!” you giggle as you hug him and he just freezes
- if he’s in the middle of a screaming fit and you go over and wrap your arms around him he’ll stop IMMEDIATELY
- “er—!! hey!”
—
·˚ ༘ you’re outside training when you hear screaming coming from the inside of the butterfly mansion, and you weren’t too surprised that when you walked in your boyfriend was being quite the sore loser.
kanao had just beat him in one of the training games, and he wasn’t too happy about it. “she was cheating! she’s cheating! let’s do a rematch!! this time i’ll beat you!” we’re all the words you heard from him as he stomped his feet aggressively.
you sigh and look at kanao who’s just staring blankly at inosuke, “i guess we could have a rematch..” she squeaks, inosuke jumping right for her - and of course he loses, again.
he’s defeated, running back over to the side lines and throwing his whole body into the wall - banging his boar mask against it and throwing a few punches. you trot over to him, your arms extending until you fully fall into his side.
he stops what he’s doing and immediately goes to push you off, not realizing it’s you. until he notices your voice, “inosuke! stop screaming! you’ll have another rematch soon.”
he immediately grabs your arms to throw you off (which he could’ve easily done since you didn’t have your guard up) but he just complained while you were practically on top of him. saying things like - “hey! get your hands off of me! i have another match to win!” or “what’s the deal?! can’t you see i’m busy?!”
of course since he hasn’t pushed you off yet you know this is calming him down, and eventually it does. his anger subsides but only for a little bit, the match eventually redos and kanao gets a few good hits in until he wins.
instantly, he’s rushing over to you and tackling you to the ground!! “i did it! ya see that? i knew i could win!” he’s yowling and jumping around and you just smile at him fondly. “congrats inosuke! but i have to go back outside and finish my training—..”
before you could finish inosuke picks you up and twirls you around before setting you back down, patting your head. “alright! don’t be long. i want you to see me beat the rest of these people!” a blush creeps onto your cheeks as you giggle, a little out of breath.
“heh.. alright! i’ll be back.” you kiss his shoulder quickly before jogging away - causing him to freeze and someone catching him off guard and winning another match…
you didn’t hear the end of it later that night!! but it was all okay when you woke up for another day and inosuke was laying on you per usual, not rummaging through your things this time.
—
YAYA I FINISHED !! it’s not as serious as i honestly hoped for but im actually super proud of this i think this is really cute !! hope u enjoy <3
REQUESTS : OPEN
#inosuke x reader#inosuke hashiriba#demon slayer#demon slayer x reader#inosuke x female reader#inosuke x male reader#demon slayer x female reader#demon slayer x male reader#headcanons#inosuke headcanons#taking requests#request#requests open#x reader#HES SO CUTE GOF HELP ME TY FOR REQUESTING SUCH S CUTE REQUEST!!!#yuff7e
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hi friends! :D y'all voted and fought neck and neck for this SO- heres the first entry into our little cooking journey of J. R. R. Tolkeins fictional food for his fictional little guys he puts in fictional turmoils for our enjoyment and awe!
Before we get started i wanna say i owe my heart to all the LotR fans who upkeep the wiki, debate the cannon, and create their own versions of the foods mentioned. Both because of my love for people who LOVE (passionate people)(passion about anything) and because my own knowledge of this series is a little dusty. I've never seen the movies but I did read the books growing up. I'll be learning and remembering things from a fairly newbie standpoint, so no worries if you yourself arent familiar with the series! (and if you are familiar, hopefully youll forgive me!)
We will be making Lembas ('waybread') today! If you've made your own version of this please feel free to share it, similarly if you have any ideas for what we make next!
(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)
MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS
SO, “what goes in to Lembas?” YOU MIGHT ASKWell so the funny thing is we kinda dont know. At least not entirely? The elves are dicks like that. But heres what we'll be using in ours-
Butter
Self-rising flour
Granulated Sugar
Raisins
A small dried fruit of your choosing
Almonds OR Pecans
EGG
Whole Milk
Heavy Cream
And if you would like for dipping-
Blackberry jam
To the extent i understand this is kinda like hardtack from the bri'ish military, but a fantastical version of it that actually tastes really good. Hardtack was a military provision with the texture of a brick that took a long time to spoil and could be easily carried with soldiers. So the texture we're going for is super dense, packed full with nuts and fruits (haha just lik-), but perhaps not that dense. We want something closer to a dog biscuit than actual tack.
I remembered something about corn being mentioned, thankfully the wiki clarified that no actually the british just referred to any grain as corn back in the day. Thank Fuck! Although I would like to try a version of this using masa in the future.
AND, “what does Lembas taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK
Took a few tries but eventually got it perfectly chewy and dense
The raisins cook-in like little beads of flavortown sweetness
Cant speak for other fruits but for dried apple it softened up nicely, kinda matching the raisins in the end
Im a big pecan slut, pecans fuck on anything especially here. Crumble them on top after you coat the dough with the egg-mixture for some visual appeal
Somewhat flakey outside
The jam was my idea, it was nice but might be too sweet for some tastes
Would pair very well with a kiwi flavored drink
Or mead
I can see why this would a travelling provision. Its both sugary (a good thing when expending energy) and filling (also a good thing when youre travelling) while not being overwhelming with flavor (if youre prone to motion sickness. Horse sickness? Do get motion sickness on horses?)
Its like how if you're going hiking you want a good mix of sugars and salts, to balance your intake of water.
. If you wanna make it like the illustrations or the movie, use a cookie cutter for either triangles or squares . If you don't have a cookie cutter, an apple cutter also works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . try to keep the board you'll roll the dough out onto chilled before you use it, it seems better for the texture of the food though i dont entirely know why
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So from beginning to end, it took about an hour and half for the first attempt. Down to about 40 minutes for the second attempt. These are a real simple recipe because its not like a croissant where the margin for error is nonexistent. Middle-earth be damned my boy can work a grill.
I'd recommend storing in a tubberware container, but if you're deadset on using leaves please rinse and dry them first, and wrap the bread in either wax paper or saran wrap underneath. We dont have mallorn leaves in real life (as far as we know) but most salad greens should work, or as Marie Porter says (linked in the reblogs!) a banana leaf.
I really enjoyed the process of making this recipe, itd be really easy to batch-bake these en masse, and the process of eating said recipe. Like all jokes aside, i think this would be a great substitute for trailmix. Its not going to get smushed and even if it breaks a bit it wont affect the taste. It wont keep you fed for a whole day but pair it with some pickles or a salty snack and yeah itll keep your motor running.
I give this recipe a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) Let me know if you think I got something wrong, or if you ran into issues with the recipe. We're off to a strong start, lads!
🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁
Ingredients:
6 TBSP butter, chilled
2 cups self-rising flour
1 TBSP granulated sugar
½ cup raisins
½ other dried fruit (strawberry slices, oranges, etc.), chopped
Handful of almonds or pecans, chopped
1 egg, well beaten
½ cup whole milk
4 TBSP heavy cream
Method:
Preheat your oven to 400 f.
Cut the butter into slivers/small pieces. With your hands, combine the butter into the flour in a mixing bowl until the mixture resembles coarse sand.
Chop your dried nuts and dried fruit until it feels right.
Mix in the sugar, raisins, nut, and dried fruit of your choosing
In a seperate bowl, beat the egg until combined, and then mix in the milk until combined. Keep a bit of this mixture to brush the tops of the bread.
Stir while adding the egg/milk mixture and the heavy cream into the flour. Mix just until combined into a soft dough.
Knead the dough until firm on a floured surface.
Roll into a half inch thickness and cut with a square or leaf shaped cookie cutter. (...or in my case, an apple corer).
Place on a lightly greased baking sheet, with about an inch of space between each piece. Brush the tops of the lembas with some of the mixture you saved earlier.
Bake for about 15-20 minutes, or until it turns a soft gold and the inside is chewy.
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Hi, this is a bit of a shot in the dark on my end, but I have a fashion inquiry (and I apologize if I sound ridiculous at all; I’m a bit at my wit’s end).
Is there a good way to research forms of casual Victorian garb? I feel like I’m going a bad route by inserting the word ‘Victorian’ into any search because it results in rather fancy things (or modern twists on such that are purchasable). Would it be wiser to site dates in search? Is this going to fruitless?
Sorry for taking up any time if this is out of wheelhouse. But if you do answer, I really appreciate it.
I'll do my best! Focusing on womenswear, because...well, that's what I know best. But if anyone wants to chime in about the gentlemen, please do so!
So, casual Victorian doesn't always read as Casual to us nowadays. Standards of casual clothing- that is, clothing one wears for everyday life when nothing special is going on -were rather higher than we have today.
This is an illustration of matchstick-makers in London's East End c. 1871, done by one Herbert Johnson. The women have their sleeves rolled up and aprons on, but when they leave the factory (rolling their sleeves down, adding hats to go outside- which most of them would have done; it was part of looking Respectable) they might be indistinguishable to us from any other women of the same era wearing not particularly bustle-y skirts. Some of them probably have on the commonplace Matching Skirt And Bodice dress format of the era; others have on blouses made from the same patterns as those worn by middle- and upper-class women.
Also note that they have on ribbons, chokers, earrings...they're just like us. They like wearing things that make them feel Put Together, even though they're doing one of the lowest-valued, most dangerous jobs open to women at the time. Because people have always been people, regardless of time or social class.
And for middle-class women and up, Casual might be even harder to distinguish from "fancy" to us today.
This is a mid-late 1880s day dress with a skirt length suitable for lots of walking, from Augusta Auctions. Could not tell you the social status of the woman who owned it, genuinely. Probably not the absolute poorest of the poor, but beyond that...this is a dress you could potentially wear to run errands. Even to go to work, if your job wasn't especially physical. Because. I don't know. It's a Day Dress. You wear it for day things. It's not especially formal, because then it would be made of a more delicate material and probably have a longer skirt (unless it was a Serious Dancing ball gown). Possibly also a lower neckline and puffed sleeves, if it was exclusively for the most formal events.
The idea that a dress was "fancy" just because it had ornamentation wasn't really in their cultural vocabulary.
Here is a group of women playing croquet in what looks like the early-mid 1870s. They're just hanging out! Having a good time! They're probably middle or upper class, but that's what they wear to chill outside with friends- to play a lowkey sport, even.
So yeah, it can be hard to map Victorian everyday clothing onto our "jeans and t-shirt" understanding of what makes an outfit casual. They had skirts and blouses for most relevant decades, but even those outfits often end up looking formal to us nowadays because of what I call Ballgownification- the idea that, since we only wear clothes that look even vaguely like what they had for extremely dressy occasions, we assume everything we see of their clothing was dressy.
(Someone please ask for my rant about Ballgownification)
Searching for "day dress," "walking dress," "blouse," "blouse waist," and "shirtwaist" (the last for the late 19th-early 20th century when that term became commonplace) might help. Best of luck!
#victorian#history#fashion history#dress history#clothing history#ask#madsk3tch#even just Throwing Something On looks dressy if all you have to throw on is. that.#I make a lot of my clothes from extant patterns and people comment on how dressed-up and put together I look#which is very kind but. these are magazine patterns. anyone had access to them#and I often even take off some of the recommended trims no less#a casual blouse waist from 1869 looks quite dressy to a modern audience#long post
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Just have to share this, because I keep seeing critiques of Veilguard that like, try to guilt people who say they love, or even like the game. And HEAVY critiques of the protagonist, Rook, and how they aren't really a hero.
ALSO it contains some SPOILERS so just be warned ☺️ and an edit of additional thoughts now!
Like, yeah I have a couple gripes about the game, but overall it's emotional and amazing and I care about the characters so deeply. I keep seeing how people are saying how Rook and the party were not well written because they caused a lot of death?? This is Dragon Age, everything always goes from bad to worse, but the characters always bring out the light.
Rook was put in a very shitty situation, and I've seen people say they caused the destruction of thousands by trying to prevent the hundreds. But how many people, before the game came out, said Solas's plan to tear down the veil was a bad idea? Not all, I'm sure, but most. I always viewed it, and I know I wasn't alone, as that by trying to "fix" things Solas was just justifying his selfish wants, when he knew somewhere in his heart that the people of today, including the elves that he was "doing this for", would rather live alongside their friends & family in a world without their old magic, than live in a world with it alone.
That being said, even with differing views in and out of the game, it's very reasonable that a group of people would try to stop him, not know the consequences. And the beautiful thing about Rook, why Varric chose THEM, is that they saw what they had created, and didn't give up, didn't leave it to someone else to fix. Whether or not it was really their fault they stepped up and tried to save the world the best they could, from the mistake they unwittingly made (which I would argue against the fact that they made a "mistake", looking at that they were hired to do a job & by successfully completing that job there were unintended consequences).
Parallels anyone? Dragon Age loves those. But the difference, again illustrated in the game, is that while Solas couldn't move past the regret of his mistakes, Rook could. And on the topic of the deaths of those around them, not everyone that died in the past was Solas's fault, but some he did directly lead to their deaths. And he accepted that, did it over & over. Rook never led anyone to their death. Rook walked willingly into it themselves, and the love and trust their companions felt led them to choose to die for Rook, and the world instead.
And people who say the destruction of the south means the earlier games were for nothing? How so? 20 years ago, 10 years ago, things were happening, people were dying that needed saving. The heroes of that age saved the world so it would still be around to save now. And who knows what the south really looks like, or what it might look like as and after rebuilding? We will, in another 10 years once BioWare comes out with more content I suppose, and I wouldn't be surprised if everyone we knew is dead, but I also wouldn't be surprised if many, many of them lived.
Because that is Dragon Age. Death, betrayal, sacrifice, cruelty, pain. It's a dark, dark world. But there is always a ray of light, of hope. And characters who will do their utmost to protect that .
EDIT: Adding!! To this!! And more spoilers!!!
We know because of the Wetlands that it's possible to cause the Blight to pull back. In the end scene, as people are being broken out of the Blight Roots, it seems to me like it's died, at least to some degree. In my playthrough, Neve was cured of her blight sickness. There's obviously some immediate changes, and that all means that the South could have had an immediate reprieve. Plus, once more surviving wardens from Weisshaupt are free to travel south, and all the factions up north get things relatively in order, the South could get a lot of assistance.
The South was overrun... By hordes, by growths? That's the land, what about the people? Could the combined might of the Inquisitor, the Chantry, The Free Marches, Fereldan's ruler, have evacuated enough people that the death toll might be high, but not totally catastrophic? Enough people have survived to rebuild, maybe with a better, more unified attitude towards one another?
(The last bit may be wishful thinking 🥲)
But still!! We have no idea what exactly happened down there. And no matter what, Rook did the best they could, they WERE a hero, and made a difference not only for the North, but everywhere affected.
And yes, I might complain about this or that, mainly that we don't get to put more past game decisions in.... But I love this game and that won't change.
#dragon age#dragon age veilguard#veilguard spoilers#dragon age rook#rook#lucanis dellamorte#lace harding#neve gallus#bellara lutare#emmerich volkarin#davrin#taash#varric tethras#da4#da4 spoilers
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To clarify,I don't believe in porn makes you evil and I don't believe in like fantasies are evil. I'm pulling this quote off Scarleteen "“If we aren’t both careful and creative we can get stuck in fantasies that don’t mature and politicize with us."" I'm also new to being about to vote, so I'm trying to be careful about what I consume and what stereotypes media perpetuate. Like I'm not moralizing about kink or anything, and my ask was how can I get aroused with media wo my kinks or wo media
hi anon, welcome back! I'm genuinely very glad to hear some follow up.
for anybody who doesn't stay vigorously up to date with all of my anons, this ask is a continuation of this one.
so I went and checked out the Scarleteen articles you mentioned in your first message, or at least I tried to. How to Approach Sexual Fantasies and Desire on Your Own Terms is here, and while I couldn't find anything with the exact title 50 Shades of Abuse, we do have 50 Shades of BS - How to Tell the Difference Between Kink and Abuse as well as 50 Shades Crappier: On Selling Abuse for Valentine's Day, both of which cover how the 50 Shades series isn't a great model of real, responsibly-practiced BDSM.
now, here's what I didn't see in any of these articles: an assertion that anybody needs to, as you've decided to do, avoid any work that depicts anything less than perfectly healthy sexual practices.
the closest we get to that is the quote by adrienne maree brown from How to Approach Sexual Fantasies, which you mention above. now, here's the thing: first of all, I actually disagree pretty substantially with brown's assertions that one's sexual fantasies need to "politicize." I know what my politics are; the fiction that I enjoy can't change that, because I don't have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair. I actually just talked about that earlier today in another ask.
(also, and this may be an unpopular opinion, but adrienne maree brown is kind of a dork who doesn't really say much of anything in Pleasure Activism that Audre Lorde didn't already say better and more succinctly, and I personally lost interest in Pleasure Activism pretty much the moment she casually dropped that she practices reiki healing because that's a pseudoscientific alternative medicine that doesn't do shit or fuck. but I digress.)
listen, I'm not trying to peer pressure or bully you into watching anything you don't want to watch. your porn consumption is up to you. but what you're doing here is absolutely moralizing, I think maybe because of an underlying assumption that media that involves sex is just, like, innately different than any other type of media, which is in itself an idea that stems from sex negativity!
I don't know, let's just try to play out a little thought exercise here. like, would you consider it reasonable if somebody told you that they've decided not to read or watch anything that depicts problematic behavior because they don't want to normalize it. like, first of all, they're never watching anything but Bluey again. except actually not even Bluey because I just remembered about Bluey in the genocide, which actually makes for a great illustration of how nonsensical and impossible it is to try to only engage with media that is 100% ideologically pure.
and again: that's fine! that's literally fine! it is 100% okay to watch or read or play things with morals that don't totally 100% align with yours. it's okay to enjoy them, even. it's a lot healthier than trying to avoid upsetting or incongruous things entirely, because that gives you the chance to actually think about it rather than trying to shut it out entirely! that article actually provides an entire list of questions you can run through with yourself to critically analyze the things you watch if you feel so inclined! that's a much better skill to practice than avoidance!
I get that when you're new to sex, as you said in the previous ask, this might seem daunting, but your brain isn't just a sponge that will uncritically soak up and adopt anything you expose it to. you very clearly have the ability to research, differentiate between fiction and real life, and form your own opinions! and it is absolutely fine if you want to just watch porn with your kinks!
like, listen, I see what the question is, and the easiest answer is just. do whatever gets you off.
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MONSTOBER: DESIGNS
Part 1: Teen Cast!
HELLOOOOO everybody! Welcome to my project, Monstober! A series of several posts with large, in depth looks at different aspects of my AU, Monster Kids, that I wrote during October this year. Special thanks to @eurazba for listening to me ramble over all this and helping with the AU over the years <3
This post will be going over the general monster designs for notable teen characters, as well as some thoughts as to why I chose said designs :D
There will be a second post for the main adult cast, and once posted, you can find it linked here :)
Jim / Toby / Claire
Jim Lake Jr (Sphinx): It's him! The poster boy! Wahoo! Honestly, I don't have many notes for his design process, because his design has stayed relatively similar since the early drafts. His was the very first design, and other than being a typical lion/eagle sphinx for like. two drawings, and then a panther/blackbird for two more, once the snow leopard/blue jay combo was struck, he's only really changed in small ways. I chose a blue jay, because they're one of my favorite birds, they're blue, and I'd used them to be an accent to Jim in a previous drawing. Snow leopards are also my favorite big cat! So similar reasoning for that particular aspect. If I were to design him today, blank slate, I miiiight have changed his cat species, but I still am way too attached to the leopard/jay combo.
Toby Domzalski (Gargoyle): Toby's design also hasn't changed much! The main trio haven't, other than minor adjustments. He originally had yellow eyes, but they're back to standard green. He also used to have larger wings, and while I liked the idea of the main three being able to fly together, I decided to go with a different route as I leaned into his design looking more aquatic, and he instead has wing shaped back fins! They fold down and sit under his clothes, as he only really can use them while swimming.
Claire Nuñez (Harpy) Also another design I haven't changed since conception! Harpies were always something cool to me, and I was inspired by an illustration of harpies in a mythology book I had bought at the time. Her design was originally just 'bird' until I tired to find a more specific species that fit. I landed on barn owls, and coincidentally, they are also associated with brujeria/witchcraft in Mexico! Win-win. With her stronger connection to magic overall, she's also the only member of Team Trollhunter that can fly reliably; her magic feeds her energy enough to keep in the air (Jim's wings are too small for anything besides light gliding and cushioning falls).
Steve / Eli / Krel / Aja
Steve Palchuk (Faun): Steve's design was always pretty formed in my head. For the guy that tries so very hard to be an all-American boy, an icon of that is the whitetail deer buck, and it very quickly fell into place! His design is fairly simple, which is why it works so well for him, IMO. Fun fact, he has a set of scars on his cheek from the equivalent of the fight he had with Jim in S1. More to expand on in a later comic, >:3c
Eli Pepperjack (Bat Humanoid): Eli was actually also a sphinx originally, but I wanted Jim to stay fairly unique among the main teens, so my follow up design was something more batlike! I did do plenty of research for monster bats, or hybrid bat monsters, but what research I could do didn't produce much (then again, could always be wrong!), so I went with 'attributes'. He's based on a Little Brown Bat. He little >:) His wings are also not capable of flight, they're basically large hands, all the better to hunt down creepers with, my dear.
Krel & Aja Tarron (Amphibious humanoids): WAHOOOOO!!!! I'm very proud of these, because you have NO IDEA how many months I struggled to find a design I liked for them. They have been (checks notes) spidertaurs, a few other passes of various insectoid tries, I was going to attempt something more seal like, because I knew the main group's designs were already mammal-heavy, and something aquatic or insectoid was what I wanted to balance the group out. Then my beloved @eurazba, listening to me ramble one night, helped me come to the idea of their 'human' transductions looking closer to old monster movies! Creature from Black Lagoon was an easy pick, I did some research about CFBL and Shape of Water (thanks Del Toro), and bada bing, bada boom! My fishy twins! Also Krel is the only one wearing shoes. Just realized this...
Mary / Darci / Shannon
Mary Wang (Dryad): Mary has also gone through a lot of changes (turns out, I was very indecisive outside of the main trio, AJDJSBSJFHB). She was actually a -taur alongside Darci! Specifically a unitaur (saw a lot of alternate Monster Falls art of Mabel Pines as one, and I really liked the idea. The overall AU was inspired by the Gravity Falls AU, now you know!) She stayed that for a while, then also went through some bug-like redesigns, and then a couple months back, I decided on a dryad! Before that point, I was trying to stay strictly to animalistic monster designs, but it became a little too confining, so she exploded into my sketchbook and became real. Her tree is a california redbud, and her 'antlers' are like the branches of the tree, and leaves/flowers bloom in time with the season on them. The hooves were based on a Zelda design from an artist I liked a lot (truffe.art on IG!)
Darci Scott (Praying Mantis-taur): HERE COMES THE BUG PAYOFF. Some of you may remember my design for Darci hasn't changed for quite some time, and while I liked the look of the cervitaur (a centaur, but deer), it didn't feel... as unique as I wanted? And I was still missing my BUG. So, debating over this, I did a few passes of her mixed with a bee, spider, etc etc... and then once again, @eurazba was like "hey! praying mantis." and I fell in LOVE with the concept. (Very quickly sketched her up as I was doing these sheets, actually NDJSNJKJD)
Shannon Longhannon (Gorgon): Last design of the group, another that has hardly changed since conception. Nagas, gorgons, lamias- whatever they're called, I love the visual of a reptilian character slinking around gracefully, and she helped balance out all the mammalian designs as well. She was originally a typical green/yellow snake, but when I inevitably color her, I picture something more ruddy, reddish brown, to match her hair :) She indeed is able to turn someone to stone, but as she was not born a gorgon, this ability is dulled, and only lasts for a few hours, working only if she focuses completely on doing so to someone. She's taken to wearing shades more often to not scare people who don't know this.
#zach's art#my aus: monster kids au#monster kids au#trollhunters#tales of arcadia#trollhunters au#jim lake jr#toby domzalski#claire nuñez#steve palchuk#eli pepperjack#krel tarron#aja tarron#mary wang#darci scott#shannon longhannon#tales of arcadia au#sphinx!jim#gargoyle!toby#harpy!claire#faun!steve#bat!eli#amphibian!krel#amphibian!aja#dryad!mary#mantis!darci#gorgon!shannon#my hand hurts from all these tags NSKDNSJKFNS#i was originally going to post these periodically through october... but i was very busy with a wedding and various family events.... augh#i have a habdful of posts i just need to finish editing together and then the lore dumps will Commence
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i was rewatching the rite of spring segment from fantasia and i've got to wonder. Why Did We Draw Archaeopteryx Like That. i remember toys having that same, boomerang arm shaped pose too. it's like a monkey lizard more than a bird.
Ooh okay this is a fun one cause while it technically is an Archaeopteryx and is listed as such in the production draft, I don't think the design is based on Archaeopteryx at all!
To me, this "Archaeopteryx" almost exactly resembles something else, the fascinating historical phenomenon called Proavis.
Proavis, or Tetrapteryx as some four-winged interpretations were called, was a hypothetical prehistoric creature that was proposed in the early 20th century as a best guess at what the unknown ancestor of birds could have looked like. The illustration above was drawn in 1926 by Gerhard Heilmann, a Danish artist and amateur scientist who argued that birds evolved from non-dinosaurian archosaurs like Euparkeria. In his 1916 book Vor Nuvaerende Viden om Fuglenes Afstamning and the 1926 English translation The Origin of Birds, he presented Proavis as the imagined midpoint between a scaly ground-running archosaur and Archaeopteryx, which at the time held the title of The First Bird.
Other versions of the same hypothesis, like William Beebe's Tetrapteryx above, were published and discussed around the same time, but it was Heilmann's Proavis that gained immense popularity to the point that bird evolution was considered essentially "solved" for decades. It was also painted by Zdeněk Burian, one of the Old Greats of palaeoart, which kept the concept alive in dinosaur books for decades as well.
Of course further study has shown this hypothesis to be incorrect and that birds are instead members of Dinosauria (and honestly Heilmann either missed or ignored a lot of evidence for a dinosaurian origin of birds even in the 1910s), but the Proavis to me remains a beautiful and fascinating concept that represents scientists and artists striving to understand the prehistoric world and the passage of evolution, much like we still do today!
And of course, its popularity in the early 20th century put it at the perfect time for Fantasia's artists to take... let's say heavy inspiration from Heilmann's imaginary Proavis when depicting a creature that was intended to be Archaeopteryx the whole time! The pattern of feathers matches up almost exactly, although the larger leg wings might have been inspired by Beebe's Tetrapteryx as well:
So to get back to your original question that led to this whole deep dive, artists didn't actually Draw Archaeopteryx Like That except when they were mistakenly drawing something that wasn't Archaeopteryx at all! If you want to read more about the Proavis and Tetrapteryx I recommend this Tetrapod Zoology blog post by Darren Naish, he does into more depth about the history of the concept and some of the unusual evolutionary ideas that Heilmann used to arrive at this weird and cool imaginary creature!
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a year!!! as of today i have now been drawing these funny little pizza freaks, to the exclusion of almost everything else, for!!! an entire year!!! i wanted to do a nice group shot/lineup of everybody to compare to when i first started trying to draw them because oh boy were they bad. i never even posted most of them anywhere because they were so bad. but im posting them here, now, to see how everything's changed/evolved.
this is probably the hardest time i've ever had trying to figure out how to work with a style, but we got there eventually; i'm pretty happy with the handle i've got on everybody now...dont let ur memes be dreams. lots of unimportant journaling and idle thoughts abt it below.
older pics
the first one is the VERY first time i drew them, before i thought i was going to actually have any interest in drawing them [lmao]; it was just the one isolated image, for my friendserver, to illustrate the funney message, so there was no attempt to make it Good or actually understand anything going on w/ the designs or style.
second is the original run of practices sketches to start trying to figure them out for real; done after i started having ideas for the comics and such and realized oh god maybe i am actually gonna draw fanart for this. [again, lol, and lmao.]
third one is the first pt art thing i posted on here. there were a couple weeks of sprite studies between this one and the previous image. the one on the top right wasn't part of that post i just threw it on as space filler; i'd intended to shift to doing Sprite Redraws But Stylized to explore tings more, but that was the only one i did. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
individual characters
peppino: by far the hardest dear god. bro what ARE your shapes how DOES your face work. jesus christ. everything i have trouble with this style for, peppino has it in excess. i draw in polygons! i need consistency! and that is the last thing this kind of style is concerned with. they are made of squarshy clay and i do not understand how to mold them. i was really hoping trying to learn this game's style would GIVE me that kind of flexibility for fun exaggerated facial expression but i don't think much came of it in the end 😔. anyway on the bright side all this means once i got peppino figured out a little bit everybody else clicked way easier.
fake peppino: honestly i never did anything with him on purpose except for how his eyes work + the perma-smile thing. i figured ok hes supposed to look weird and off model so whatever happens with him happens. and it did. and it kept happening. it is still, in fact, happening.
noise/ette: somehow, for every bit that peppino was the least natural thing i've ever tried, these two worked pretty much right off the bat. i still don't understand it, seeing as pretty much all the things at play for peppino are also at work for them. i think the new sketches are actually a little worse than older ones but not enough that i care.
gustavo: really funny bc i drew him on model twice and just went 'okay, cool nice, easy, um. he doesn't have any fucking legs?' fortunately he was the only one i had a strong idea for how to stylize him [square] and it worked exactly as i was hoping so wahoo.
brick: is an animal and therefore 5000x easier and more natural for me to draw/stylize than anything else in the cast. that is Just a rat bro. i can draw a rat.
gerome: i think the funniest one here. the most drastic and least necessary change imo. i was gonna have him be really small at first, like smaller than the noises, but then i just... didn't. he's just peppino-sized now. also i gave him like. actual human facial structure, which is funny bc in most cases i'd do anything to avoid, but it works well for his being A Rock to give him some angles and definition like that+ to differentiate his vibe from the rest of the cast who are all very squishy. also since he is essentially Just A Head it's good to emphasize that too ig.
john: i only drew john a couple times but he gets to be here because i like him. and because most of the stuff i applied to gerome was readily applicable to john, though i did try to keep him a little more uncanny because he is a Huge And Lanky Freak. i hate that he is barefoot btw but idk how to make his color balance look right with shoes.
pizzahead: i did not want to put him on here honestly but i Have drawn him a handful of times and more importantly i didn't know what i was gonna do with john's pose if i didn't have him there to be glared at. the only thing that's different with him is giving him wider-bottomed pants, which i got from when i tried to draw these guys in clone high style [i never posted that one either][i will eventually]
snick: he gets to be here because 1. he's like 6 lines 2. i like him and 3. ive scribbled him a few times offhand and it went pretty well
misc
there are some guys missing because those are guys i didn't draw enough [or at all] to have gotten comfortable with them. sorry
i would have Liked to shade these but for the time being i have accepted that my grasp of light/shadow has decayed to the point im not going to be happy with anything i try there, so For Now i am working on my presentation with flats i guess. gerome has a shadow only because he's shaded like that ingame and looks naked without it
anyway if you are still reading [hi?] i get to shamelessly plug now. i'm over the hill of my pizza run now, and while i still have plenty of things i want to make here, most of the bigger more in-depth ones have passed. pizza tower was the first thing in THREE YEARS to get me out of my oc groove to doing fanart, and once i am done with my ideas here i will be going right back to it. if you like my art or how i write characters/interactions you should check out my oc/webcomic blog @jamverse . i can't promise people who like pizza stuff will be terribly into my designs, but i can guarantee i treat my guys with the exact same sort of tone i handle the pt guys with. and hell, i've mentioned it a few times before, but like 70% of my characterization for fake pep is just copied off one of my characters, so if u are going to miss him... he will still be there in spirit >;p
and if you dont care about any of that and are still reading thank you anyway. actually making these comics + seeing how shockingly well-received they've been has done a lot for my confidence, and for seeing that my kind of stuff IS something people enjoy :')
#pizza tower#peppino spaghetti#fake peppino#gustavo and brick#the noise#noisette#pizzahead#arting#pizzaposting
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So after being in school alone with my thought, i wondered the question no one dared to ask, what is my friends daily account activity? Do they really hold up as dailies? How much dailies account even in there? Did brody cause 9/11? All those questions went trough my brain like wildfire, and after a very long 15 seconds of thinking i too the harduous task of finding every single daily accounts and using the power of MATH to see their overall activity.
so follow me on my little rambling as i see the RISE and FALL of the yttd daily community
So lets say some ground rule, when i mean activity i mean that the blog has posted adn actual daily blog post and not just talked or respounded to asks, so for example brocoli respounds to asks but he didn't post a daily since a certain time. Rule understood, okay okay.
First part of this task was to fin every single daily blogs and look their last posts, and this was the longest part for sure.
forget my very bad typos this was written in a moment of euphoria. What we can see from this is that there is 1 billion blogs actually but also that a ton of those blogs are in fact desactivated. THose which are classified as today are actually yesterday post i just was very lazy to change it.
Second phase was to put them all in different categories on a exel sheet to see the overal proportions and see the average of month since a last daily was posted.
as we can see there is no joke 53 FUCKING DAILY ACCOUNTS. But more importrantly about 16 of those accounts are either gone and dissapeared out of the face of the earth or they are simply stated as inactive by the daily in question. The second largest numbers are didn't post in 8 months and 4 months.
third part was to make a graphical illustration of my point, so i made a camembert.
so yeah i'm not gonna do a big study but its pretty clear that if we only consider daily accounts who posted today or this month as actual dailies then we can consider all the others as inactive dailies.
What was the point of this you might say? Well i wanted to prove my theories, first off most of those daily accounts were in fact born from the brody genesis, so when brody created his daily keiji account. It became a popular idea and everyone impulsively created accounts. The thing is that having a daily account is not some funny bussiness its extremely tiring and extremly difficult, and since most of the yttd community on tumblr are teens to young adults, we mostly have school to deal with. So keeping up with pace is pretty much impossible. Second my guess was that honestly all daily accounts would burn out in two months, and i was kinda right. Yes the graph seems to show that they lasted longuer, but actually, this doesnt count the time of inactivity in betwens or the long breaks. Most account burned out after 1 or 2 months which is pretty logical. LIke dailyshinai/rune burned out in two month for example.
I think the overral if we did a competion winners would be @rekofan101 who posted for a year straight and just terminated being a daily on their own account and janice/ @daily-dose-of-bucket who despite longs breaks are still posting. The dailies had an immense rise at one point but the fall was even harder slowly has the accounts and trend started to burn out. As someone who is on a dailies account i will say out of the maybe 30 blogs on it only lik 8 are actually active and only 1 post regularly.
This is isnt' at all a judgement or anything but its an interresting depictions of how waves of trends affect certains populations.
Tho if i had to give advices to make a daily account it would be:
-make it a weekly, more time better results last longuer
-don't do it alone perhaps do it with a friend and alternate betwen one another
-if you have adhd, a job, memory issues or overall issues that will make it evn more difficult for you to make an account a daily, i would consider not doing it, instead perhaps just do a regular fan account like me
But anyway thank for reading my useless unemployed friend rambling and keep doing what you love!
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Love Me Like A Rockstar (6)
ー☆ Chapter 6: Spirit
Author: bvidzsoo
Pairing: Song Mingi x female reader
ー☆ Warning: cussing really ー☆ Word count: 8.2k ー☆ Genre: university!au, enemies to lovers!au, rockstar!au ー☆ Rating: sfw ー☆ Summary: Love. You wanted none of it. You had already been heartbroken very badly once, you didn't wish to go through that ever again. But the Universe works in intricate ways and, somehow, you found yourself webbed up in a local rockstar's life, Song Mingi. He was everything you expected him to be, yet nothing like you imagined him he would be. What happens when you find mutual understanding and have heartful conversations? Will he be able to break down your walls? Will you be able to chase away his darkness?
A/N: Hello, lovelies! This is a chill and soft chapter compared to the mess the past few ones had been lol. I tried out something new with the passing of the week in the story, while illustrating it, I hope it's enjoyable and nice. I thought it was a nice little idea. I think we can say that they are finally headed in the right direction lol. Let me know your thoughts! I'll try to update next week, but with classes back again...I cannot promise anything, I was dreading this moment lol. Please listen before or while reading this chapter to Spirit, this chapter's song. I hope you enjoy, happy reading!
Taglist: @orshii @or5i @lovely-red2 @scarfac3 @sunaswifes-blog @voicesinmyhead-rc @teez-the-time @maru-matt @kyeos4ng @deathbyyeekies @chicksmoothie @mjlbn01
⟨Series M.list ↭ Previous Chapter⟩
♫Playlist♫
『But it's nice to hear a voice or two
Something's stirring, my conscience is split into two
And it might be a phase
But I swear this shit is clear-view』
The noise was too much—well, it wasn’t any different to how noisy the cafeteria usually was—but my head was thumping violently and my eyes were burning. I hated to admit it, but a cold was catching up on me and that brought bigger despair into my bones than it was necessary. I hated being sick, and it really wouldn’t come in handy right now as I had to study for the upcoming test Seulgi wouldn’t stop yapping about. She had been talking about it since we had stepped inside the cafeteria, and it was only adding onto my growing headache, making me sniff loudly as the hot steam of the—somewhat tasty—soup was blowing into my face, making my eyes sting. I had to consume something hot—and healthy—if I wished to recover faster. I couldn’t help but shudder as I wrapped the warm beige and black patterned jacket tighter around my frame. Considering the state I was in—I should’ve probably worn something warmer—but I had assumed it would be warm outside today—it wasn’t.
“I think the professor said something about checking whether we handed in all the assignment, and how that will count for our final grade too.” Seulgi was still going on about that dreaded test, and I groaned as the spoon slipped from my fingers and rattled loudly against the metal cup my soup was in. Seulgi’s eyes snapped up as she looked at me, her own spoon hanging midair in her hand as she looked at me concerned, “Y/N, are you okay?”
“No.” I snapped, holding my head in my hands as I sighed loudly, “You keep talking about that bloody test and I already have a ragging headache—please, Seulgi, for the love of God, shut up!”
“Jesus,” Seulgi muttered at my outburst, very visibly trying to hold back her amused grinned, “when did you become such a drama queen—oh, wait. You’ve always been one!”
I rolled my eyes and flipped her off before grabbing my spoon and scooping up some soup, bringing it to my lips to blow it before eating it. Seulgi just giggled and continued eating her soup. My phone, which was placed on the table, suddenly buzzed, and my eyes traveled to it quickly, reaching out for it with my left hand.
“So, uhm, last night at the concert…” Seulgi trailed off and my eyes lifted to look at her for a second, watching as her cheeks suddenly flushed.
“What about it?” I asked as I unlocked my phone and very aggressively tried to ignore the sudden violent thumping of my heart. Fuck, why was my body acting up so much lately? My fingers were eager as I pressed on the notification from Mingi, opening up our chatroom.
I hate him: how u holding up Me: terribly…my head is on the verge of exploding and seulgi just keeps on going and going
There was a cough and I remembered the soup in my spoon, that I hadn’t eaten yet, and, so, I quickly did as my eyes traveled back to Seulgi. One eyebrow was cocked as she looked at me, but she didn’t say anything just swirled her spoon around in her soup.
“Well, Wooyoung was very nice, he’s—lovely.” Seulgi licked her lips as she averted her eyes when a small knowing smirk grew on my lips, “Yeah, very lovely, anyways, he dedicated a song to me and kept on looking at me while he was singing and—yeah, he stayed by my side all evening.”
Another buzz of my phone, and I had to fight every nerve in my body to not open the message immediately. Besides, I was having a conversation with Seulgi, she was more important right now.
“Sounds lovely, indeed.” I hummed before gulping down another spoonful of my soup. Seulgi’s eyes narrowed slightly, as she leaned forward in her seat.
“Since when did you start agreeing that a man was lovely—let alone Wooyoung?!” She made an expression as if what we were talking about was scandalous, and I scoffed, the phone buzzing in my hand again. My grip tightened around it and I quickly unlocked my phone before looking back at Seulgi.
“If I hate a man, that’s the problem, if I am supportive of the guy you’re hanging out with, that’s the problem. Make up your mind, Seulgi.” I deadpanned, and my best friend just scoffed, leaning back in her seat as she was finished with her soup. I raised my eyebrows at her and she pursed her lips. I couldn’t help it, but my eyes traveled down back to my phone as I quickly read the text from Mingi.
I hate him: seulgi seems like a cool person, wooyoung talks about her all the time is ur head okay? still got a headache?
I have no idea when texting each other become normal, because I still found it weird, and slightly irritating. After last night, I thought things would just…remain the same way. Just because Mingi and I shared some personal things did not mean that we now had to be—like this. Like we were friends or something, because we certainly weren’t. I still couldn’t stand his guts, and my thoughts on him did not change one bit. He was still a self-centered, arrogant, and an egotistical asshole, and yet this morning I woke up to a good morning text from him, eyebrows furrowing, and fingers quickly typing out a text which said that I was blocking him if he sent one more message. And he proceeded to send several more…to the point where I couldn’t ignore him anymore…and just…texted back. And it was weird, because my heart would not settle for one second each time I got a text from him, and I hated this feeling. What was happening to me? Why didn’t I just block him already?
“Y/N, are you listening to me?” I felt caught red-handed as I looked up at Seulgi, who’s eyes were narrowed once again, as she kept looking between me and my phone, suspicion growing on her face. I cleared my throat awkwardly, and despite wanting to ignore it, I quickly typed back to Mingi before placing down my phone and paying full attention to my best friend.
Me: yeah, it’s gotten worse
“I’m sorry, my mom texted me and it was urgent.” I lied through my teeth, hoping that Seulgi would buy it. My mother rarely texted me; she would usually call even for the smallest things, however, there were rare instances and Seulgi knew that, but the look on her face told me that she didn’t fully believe me.
“Okay,” She drew out the word and I went back to eating my, now, warm soup, “I was just saying that…I think I’m falling for Wooyoung.”
I paused as my eyes slowly raised, falling on Seulgi. Her voice had gotten quiet and she was fiddling with her fingers in her lap, cheeks slightly coated pink. I didn’t say anything as I continued looking at her, but she was still avoiding eye contact. In fact, she looked on the verge of passing out and that was very unnecessarily funny—but Seulgi didn’t seem to think the same.
“Stop that!” She snapped, leaning over the table, “I’m serious, I—stop looking at me like that!”
I pressed my lips tightly together to stop another snort from breaking through and looked back down at my half-eaten soup, not feeling like having more of it, but the soreness in my throat was slightly gone, and my body wasn’t shivering as much as before. I had to eat a little bit more.
“He’s too sweet and caring, I can’t help it.” Seulgi went on, voice still quiet in the loud cafeteria, “And he treats me well. Like…he pays a lot of attention to me and remembers everything I say. You should’ve seen him last night, up on the stage, I try not to think about it, but I think the song he sang was…a confession or something.”
“Why don’t you ask him out then?” I found myself asking as I finished my soup too, not having an appetite to eat anything else.
“Well—” Seulgi sighed and leaned back in her seat, “I’m scared I’m just reading too much into things, you know. I might be overthinking everything, and it turns out he sees me just as a friend.”
“I highly doubt that,” I said with a chuckle as I placed my left elbow on the table and my chin in my palm, “Would someone who isn’t into you dedicate a love song to you?”
“I wouldn’t.” Seulgi muttered, cheeks turning pink again. I grinned at her as my head continued throbbing, I tried to ignore it. Now that I had eaten, I could finally take my medicine. This morning when I woke up there was a note on the counter in the kitchen and three pills placed on top of it, instructions on the note from my mother as to when and how to take them. She knows me too well.
“Exactly, you wouldn’t, and neither would Wooyoung.” I told Seulgi and I watched as a small flustered smile made it on her face. It made me chuckle, I felt happy for her. Seulgi deserves someone who treats her right and loves her a lot, her previous relationships have been all close to terrible, her partners not understanding her fully. Seulgi was an artistic soul trapped in a fragile, but warrior body.
“You think I should ask him out?” Her voice was small, I knew she was scared of ruining something which brought her so much happiness. I didn’t want to see her suffering either, so I didn’t want to give her the wrong advice, but sometimes we had to take a leap of faith and see how things work out.
“I mean, at this point I’m convinced he’s into you, so…” As I trailed off, a sudden, and weird, thought popped into my head. I could always ask Mingi about Wooyoung’s feelings towards Seulgi, but that implied two things. One, I was giving away Seulgi’s feelings towards Wooyoung, and perhaps that wasn’t a smart move as Mingi would surely tell Wooyoung about it. Two, it implied that Mingi and I were now on a level of friendship where talking about our friends feelings was alright. And it certainly wasn’t, because—Mingi and I weren’t friends. I don’t like Mingi, and he—just enjoys making my life hell.
“I’ll think about it.” Seulgi said with a hum, and then her eyebrows suddenly furrowed, “But—enough about me and Wooyoung. Are you okay?”
My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at her and shrugged, “Well, my head is on the verge of exploding, but other than that, I think I’m fine.”
“You didn’t sound fine yesterday, Y/N.” Seulgi had a knowing look in her eyes and I realized she figured it out that I had lied on the phone when I told her I had a family emergency, hence why I wouldn’t go to Outlaw with her. I just sighed, feeling smaller as I pulled my jacket tighter around myself.
“I was just—” How was I supposed to tell her that I pretty much had a breakdown and felt like dying because I found out that Yunho was Mingi’s best friend, and that I damn nearly lost my mind when I saw Yunho happy with another woman on Instagram? It sounded crazy even to me and I didn’t want to embarrass myself even more. I knew Seulgi would understand and never make fun of me, but I felt pathetic, and I refused to make a fool out of myself again, “Tired, and stressed. Nothing I can’t handle.”
“Are you sure?” Seulgi asked softly, her hand reaching over the table and grabbing my arm, her warmth seeping through the fabric of my jacket. It was comforting, “You know you can tell me anything.”
And suddenly I felt like telling her that Mingi and I had been texting since last night, since—since he witnessed the aftermath of my breakdown, and drove me home because it was raining too hard. But it didn’t feel real, I knew it wouldn’t last. Whatever this was—whatever Mingi was trying to do, it wasn’t real. It wouldn’t become anything real. And so, I forced a smile on my lips and nodded at Seulgi, patting her hand with my right one.
“Of course, and I do tell you a lot of things, you know?” Seulgi just rolled her eyes and retracted her arm, making me chuckle. As she leaned back in her seat I heard some commotion happening behind me, but I didn’t turn around to check. Today was not the day where I fed my curiosity, all I wanted to do was go home, get underneath the thick blanket, and sleep for a whole week so that the sickness would be gone.
“I always feel like you know more about me than I know about you—and we’ve been friends for years now, Y/N.” Seulgi shook her head and I chuckled.
“That’s because you talk a lot more than I do.” I teased her with a chuckle and she rolled her eyes, until they suddenly widened and she was sitting up straighter in her seat, making me furrow my eyebrows. I noted the way she subtly tried to fix her hair as they were in two low ponytails, and before I could ask her about what she was doing, I heard two male voices behind me, one of them shrill, while the other one was raspy. I should’ve hated myself for how quickly my body reacted, my heart in my throat as my ears suddenly started ringing due to the rapid thumping of my heart.
“Hi, girls!” Wooyoung’s cheery voice was loud as he suddenly appeared to my left, going around the table. The chair to my right was drawn back and my body stiffened as a backpack was dropped at the foot of the table. Wooyoung pulled a chair out for himself and plopped down in it messily, leaning towards Seulgi, making her eyes slightly widen. Wooyoung pressed a loud kiss against her cheek, and I couldn’t help but stare back at her just as surprised as Seulgi was looking at me. And she’s afraid that Wooyoung doesn’t feel the same for her?! Before I could say something inappropriate and something Seulgi would kill me for, the deep chuckle to my right distracted me, reminding me of my own rapid heartbeat all of a sudden. I turned my head and came face to face with Mingi, who had a soft smile on his lips. My left hand turned into a fist as I didn’t know how to react—how to act. What was he doing here? Why was he here? And why was he looking at me like…he was actually happy to see me?
“Hi.” He greeted quietly as his smile widened and I gulped, trying to ignore the glasses sitting on his long nose. They were close to slipping off, but it didn’t seem to bother Mingi as he didn’t do anything about it, his dark and fluffy hair falling in his eyes, giving him a boyish look. He was wearing casual clothes, light blue jeans paired with a dark purple hoodie, and a few silver necklaces peeked through from underneath the fabric as it fell close to Mingi’s collarbones. I cleared my throat and averted my eyes, noticing that neither men carried trays with themselves. Were they not going to eat?
“Hi.” I greeted back quietly and pushed my shoulders back as I turned my head away, suddenly becoming extremely aware of the two pair of eyes watching Mingi and I with intrigue, but also surprise. My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at Seulgi, but she didn’t react. Mingi seemed nonchalant as he noticed the two sitting across from us being weird, and suddenly, a yellow thermostat was pushed in my direction.
“I got you some wild berry tea,” He said as my eyes snapped back to him, growing wide, “since you’re not feeling too well. I hope it helps with the headache and sore throat. Imagine how much worse you’d be feeling if you didn’t listen to me…wanting to walk home in the rain—”
“Yeah, thank you, okay!” I didn’t mean to exclaim, nor blush as hard as I have, but Seulgi’s eyes were boring into the side of my head, and I was scared Mingi would say something which I would have to explain to her later—and I did not want to do that, like at all. Mingi’s smile was amused as he nodded once, resting his hands on the table as he watched me fumble with the yellow thermostat as I tried to put it away in my bag. God, this was mortifying—why would he embarrass me so badly?!
“Now it makes sense why you kept carrying that around with you,” Wooyoung chuckled, and his next words made everything worse, “You hate tea.”
Of course Mingi hated tea, why would he like it? Like any normal person does?! And the knowing smirk on Seulgi’s face was certainly not helping as I cleared my throat, and pushed my hair behind my shoulders before crossing my arms in front of my chest.
“Who hates tea?” I found myself muttering with a scoff, trying to diffuse the weird tension, but I really should have just shut up.
“I do.” Mingi muttered back, jutting his lips out into a pout, and my eyebrows furrowed as I looked at him, hating the way my eyes lingered on his red, plush, lips.
“Whatever.” I found myself saying as Mingi chuckled, angling his body towards me. My eyes darted to Seulgi alarmed, but thankfully it seemed like Wooyoung and her weren’t interested in us anymore as they fell into conversation, their voices loud and eager as Wooyoung explained something to her and Seulgi nodded enthusiastically.
“Did you sleep well? I never got to ask you this morning…” Mingi spoke up again, and my eyes were back on him. I sighed and shook my head no, trying to ignore the weird feeling in my heart. Why was Mingi sitting with me when he could be entertaining his baboons—fangirls—right this second? Somehow that thought was a little more infuriating than it should have been, so I quickly pushed it away and answered Mingi instead.
“Not really, but it’s fine. I had a rough day yesterday.” I found myself explaining, and Mingi hummed, “And you…did you sleep well?”
My voice sounded hesitant, and I found myself feeling unsure suddenly, wondering where this conversation would lead to. What even was the meaning of it.
“Yeah, but it was short lived.” Mingi said with a chuckle, and I raised an eyebrow.
“Why?”
“I got inspired,” Mingi’s cheeks suddenly flushed a light shade of red, and my eyes narrowed as he suddenly avoided eye contact, running a hand through his hair, “So I stayed up to write lyrics.”
“Oh, I see.” I pursed my lips and found myself wanting to say more, “I know the feeling. I get inspired at the worst of times. I’ve stayed up countless nights just to draw or paint. It’s really a pain in the ass when you have class in the morning.”
Mingi laughed and nodded, “I know, I can’t tell you how often I skip those classes.”
“I wish my professors were that lenient.” I chuckled as I rolled my eyes, making Mingi smile as he leaned slightly closer, making me stiffen as his glasses hung on for dear life on the bridge of his nose. I was itching to push them up his nose—and since when did I get such urges?! I’d rather die than touch Mingi.
“Mine aren’t lenient either, but—” He leaned even closer, and my jaw tightened as I fought every nerve in my body wanting to lean away, “If you’re smart about it, they’ll let you off.”
“Are you calling me dumb?” I narrowed my eyes at Mingi and he chuckled, finally leaning away, back in his seat. It felt like I could finally breathe, but my heart still felt like it would fall out of my ass any minute.
“There it is—I’ve missed her.” Mingi’s words were sarcastic, but the teasing smile on his lips told me he wasn’t necessarily bothered.
“What.” I huffed, crossing my arms in front of my chest again, “You admit that you act like an ass just to piss me off?”
“I don’t act like an ass, doll,” There it was, that stupid nickname he’d called me by once today already through text, “It’s you who gets bothered by me being simply myself.”
“Yeah, ‘cuz you got a shit personality.” I found myself huffing, finding this exchange a lot more familiar, less unnerving compared to the weird amicable conversations we’ve been having since last night.
“Well, that I did not miss.” Mingi’s eyebrows were in a frown, and I suddenly felt—bad. Since when did I care if I hurt his feelings or not? I bit back a groan and sighed loudly instead, licking my lips.
“Whatever, I—thanks for driving me home last night.” I found myself blurting it out despite having thanked him once already, “I would feel a lot worse now if you had let me walk home in the rain…”
Suddenly the yellow thermostat placed on the table next to my hand felt like it was burning my skin, and my cheeks grew hot. No way in hell I was blushing because of a bloody thermostat right now.
“Yeah, I told you so, didn’t I?” Mingi wriggled his eyebrows playfully, and before I could stop and think, my right hand was balled into a fist and I was hitting Mingi’s bicep, scowling at him. It made him laugh loudly as he pushed my hand away, his palm warm against my fisted hand, and I realized my cheeks were even hotter now. Fuck, where can I bury myself right now?! And if seeing the satisfied smirk on Mingi’s face wasn’t bad, the sudden silence coming from Seulgi and Wooyoung certainly was worse as they gaped at both Mingi and I. I knew why, of course, but Mingi seemed not to catch on as he looked at Wooyoung with a confused frown, raising his eyebrows at him. They were very probably shocked by the sight in front of them—Mingi and I being cordial for once? Never heard before, never to be imagined up until this point. And when Seulgi opened her mouth to say something, I just knew nothing good would come out of it, and I quickly kicked my left foot out underneath the table, my boot coming in contact with her shin, making Seulgi yelp loudly as her eyes grew into saucers. Wooyoung looked at her confused and she grit her teeth, brushing off the concerned questions rolling off Wooyoung’s lips, Mingi looking between Seulgi and I confused. I forced a tight smile on my lips and gave Seulgi a warning with my eyes, thankfully successfully shutting her up as she started speaking about the test we’d have tomorrow, coercing both Mingi and Wooyoung into a conversation as I sneakily unclasped the yellow thermostat and took a small gulp of the tea made by Mingi. It was sweet.
『And I'm standing at the edge
I'm just trying to pretend that I want you so deeply
'Cause your spirit sings sweetly to me
Think I'd rather be alone』
Monday
Me: mingiii i passed my test!!! I hate him: omg really?! that’s great, congrats!! Me: told ya, i’m too smart bby lol I hate him: who’s the cocky one now? Me: u
Tuesday
I hate him: can’t remember the last time i ate mashed potatoes Me: lol that’s random? I hate him: lol ik…i’m over at woo’s and his mom made us some fancy dinner everything is mouth watering i think i reached heaven finally Me: aren’t u a bit dramatic rn? u acting like u hadn’t had food in a year I hate him: food t h i s good i certainly hadn’t have also, i’m not dramatic side eye Me: shouldn’t u be paying attention to whatever’s going on there? i mean…woo’s mom did prepare all the food for u don’t be ungrateful, put ur phone away I hate him: yah, why are u trying to get rid of me? i’m in the bathroom, btw so i’m not being ungrateful to anyone dumbass Me: firstly, ew. secondly, asshole I hate him: i’m only washing my hands chillax oh—woo’s calling for me ttyl Me: no, actually don’t text me ever again.
Wednesday
I hate him: have u seen the moon? it’s so pretty Me: mingi?? it’s literally 1am I hate him: i know, but have u? Me: yeah, i’m looking at it rn I hate him: isn’t it so pretty? Me: it is but what’s gotten into u? I hate him: nothing…i just can’t sleep Me: me neither I hate him: so what are u doing then… Me: was trying to draw but it’s not coming to me rn hasn’t happened in long so i was on tik tok scrolling what are u doing? I hate him: idk i’m just… idk i was jotting down some lyrics but it’s not coming to me either i’ve been just restless all day long Me: ik, u’ve said so during lunch did u get to eat that hot dog, btw? or did wooyoung steal it again I hate him: nah, i let him have it then made some for myself when i got home it’s too quiet, i hate it Me: play some music the one you showed me yesterday that one was good I hate him: u liked it? i thought u didn’t Me: i was just fucking with you i’ve been listening to it on repeat I hate him: oh, that’s cool it’s one of my faves i’m glad u like it too now Me: mingi i’m becoming sleepy now… I hate him: it’s okay go to sleep we’ll talk tomorrow Me: sweet dreams, mingi I hate him: u too, y/n … i miss Yuyu so badly
Thursday
Me: i think i’m stuck I hate him: u need help? Me: with my assignment, mingi… I hate him: yeah, still need some help? Me: what does a music major possibly know about impressionism?? I hate him: i thought that’s ur favorite style? how come u’re struggling?? Me: even the most talented prodigy’s struggle sometimes mingi I hate him: my apologies ur highness, for i have committed such a treacherous act by assuming u are not enlightened enough for this assignment may i propose a recreational method that might help such torturous process to come to an end faster? Me: pls stop talking like that I hate him: i’m actually typing but ok wanna know??? Me: yes, idiot just say it already I hate him: say it out loud Me: i can’t belive u just made a twilight reference i’m blocking u like rn I hate him: so anyways wanna hang out? Me: i thought u had something smart to help me out with… I hate him: t h i s is that smart thing Me: i gotta help mom with dinner in half an hour so i can’t I hate him: and tomorrow? Me: mingi… I hate him: okay, fine…at least i tried… again and again and again Me: told u to stop but u never listen I hate him: ofc i don’t wooyoung told me not to give up u’ll say yes eventually Me: wooyoung is literally the worst person u could accept advice from stop I hate him: he just read this and now he’s crying thanks Me: not my problem ur friends look at ur phone when we’re talking wait— what?! I hate him: lol u’re fucked did u not tell Seulgi? that we’re talking… Me: why would i? we’re not friends I hate him: ouch that one hurt but ok Me: tell wooyoung he’s dead if he says anything to seulgi i mean it, bro I hate him: ok, bro.
Friday:
Me: min are u mad at me? I hate him: why u asking Me: cuz u’ve been ignoring me today and u haven’t answered my texts and u’re still dry is this… because i said we ain’t friends yesterday? I hate him: took u long enough to figure it out dumbass Me: well u are the dumb one, idiot if u don’t talk to me how am i supposed to know?! I hate him: how would u feel if i said we ain’t friends? Me: idk but i certainly wouldn’t overreact because we really aren’t friends min I hate him: pff ok bye Me: are u serious rn?? mingi??? ???????? MINGI?! SONG MINGI?!?!?!? I hate him: stop blowing up my phone Me: mute me then I hate him: ok Me: wait don’t omg fuck okay mingi i’m sorry I hate him: wasn’t that hard to say it was it Me: are we actually friends then? i said that because idk I hate him: yeah we’re friends Me: ok but just for the record I still hate your guts u’re insufferable self-centered egoistical selfish annoying an asshole arrogant and you always piss me off idiot I hate him: weird way to confess but ok ig love u too bestie Me: song mingi.
Saturday
I hate him: y/n the world is spinning Me: lol are u drunk? I hate him: not drunk tipsy definitely fuck i can’t see the letters Me: for someone who claims they can’t see the letters u’re typing extraordinarily well I hate him: autocorrect exists thank fuck damn i need water Me: go drink some then idiot I hate him: ok will u pick me up? Me: lol no get ur ass home i don’t have a car I hate him: u could drive mine Me: did u drive there when u knew u were going to drink??! I hate him: nope lol this is funny i almost slipped off my seat lol woo is so loud and hwa thinks we can’t see but he’s had his hand on hong’s thigh all night long it’s disgusting—not like that! i love them— yn maybe i’m drunk hey, i should probably stop typing doll? Me: mingi u’re shitfaced and funny stop texting me ttyl when u’re hopefully sober take care and… text me when u get home
Sunday:
I hate him: god…i’m never drinking again Me: lol welcome back to the land of living I hate him: haha aren’t u just s o funny rn? Me: i’m always funny my sense of humor is immaculate I hate him: u wish i’m the funny one hongjoong drove me home last night sorry for not texting, but the second my head hit the pillow i fell asleep Me: it’s fine glad u made it back safe and that u’re alive ig I hate him: aww did you worry about me? missed me? omg u’re so cute!!!! Me: blocked I hate him: ik u can’t do it cute Me: fuck off
『Shut the lights
Lock my phone
Close the blinds
Here we go
I'm in motion
So long 'til the dawn』
Today’s theme in Professor Yoon’s class was a painting of your imagination following a style you really love. Impressionism has been a painting style I’ve been obsessed with since a young age, always begging my mother to take me to art galleries which displayed said style. There is something about the fusion of colors, the tracing of lines soft yet accentuated. Perhaps it was the bloom of colors which attracted me to it when I was younger, but as I started practicing it, I realized it was actually the freedom I loved about Impressionism. You could start out with something small, which would lead to something big and beautiful. It looked like it followed no system, yet everything came together once you looked at the whole picture, once you took in the beauty of it all. I had chosen the painting Waterlilies and Japanese Bridge by Claude Monet as inspiration for today’s class, the blues and greens dominating the painting, the lilies having a light purple yet pink hue, never outshining the greens and blues though. It was a color play, giving depth to the painting by using a darker shade, or just drawing over it with the same color until the shadows were created. The painting was a masterpiece, and I was the happiest when my mother gifted me the painting—of course it had been a fake one, but an eight-year-old didn’t care about such things. And I would still not care about it. Of course, owning an original like that is any painters dream, especially mine, but unless I had the money and connections to actually own a Claude Monet painting, I would have to suffice with the fakes that could trick non-art lovers into believing it was real.
The class had been a pleasant one, with classical music playing in the background and with Professor Yoon walking around and helping his students by giving advice or by taking their paintbrushes and sweeping over their canvas, patting their backs with a small smile as he encouraged everyone to keep on going. Mr. Yoon is probably one of my favorite professor’s, always dedicated and soft. Never too rough or demanding. He had always helped out those who needed it and it was very clear he loved what he was doing. Each class he’d bring something new, an idea or a project, and he’d let us explore our creativity and evolve in areas we didn’t think were our forte. If only more professors like him existed, perhaps my years at university would’ve been a little bit more pleasant. But the class came to an end earlier than I wished for, bringing me back to reality as Mr. Yoon clapped his hands twice, a bright smile on his face. He had long light blonde hair swept behind his ears and soft features, he almost looked angelic in the right lightning.
“Very well, class. Today’s lesson is over.” There was a rumble of thunder in the distance as I sighed loudly, “You can bring your paintings to the backroom to dry and we’ll see each other on Friday. We’ll be continuing with today’s project, so have no worries if you couldn’t finish it today.”
There was a murmur of thanks in the classroom and my serene bubble was popped when something to my left crashed loudly against the floor. Seulgi had knocked over the little metal can full of her paintbrushes, and she cursed silently as she bent down to pick them up. A few of the girls around us helped her as I got off my stool, handing her a stray paintbrush as it had rolled over.
“Are you in a rush?” I asked confused as she snatched the brush from my hands and hastily thanked whoever helped her.
“Yes!” She exclaimed, eyes wide, as she took a peek at her wristwatch, “Fuck. I have a date with Wooyoung in an hour and I need to get ready!”
My eyebrows raised. A date with Wooyoung? She never told me they were going out now. Strange. I could’ve sworn she would’ve called me screaming her head off if Wooyoung had asked her to be his girlfriend.
“When did you ask him out?” I managed to ask as I started packing away my own stuff. The chatter in the class was slowly dying down as people were leaving. There was another rumble of thunder in the distance.
“I didn’t ask him out.” Seulgi huffed, pushing her wavy hair out of her eyes. My eyebrows furrowed as I paused to look at her. She glanced at me and rolled her eyes.
“We’re hanging out, it’s not a date date.” Seulgi explained quickly, putting her bag around her left shoulder, “But I think I will ask him out today. I’ve had enough of beating around the bush. If he likes me, good, if he doesn’t—we’ll see what happens.”
“He likes you, trust me.” I gave her a reassuring smile and Seulgi’s expression softened for a second before she became panicked again. I chuckled and grabbed her arm, steering her towards the exit, “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of your painting too. Get going if you don’t want to be late.”
“Oh my God,” Seulgi exclaimed, pouting, “I love you!”
I cringed away when she pressed a sloppy kiss against my cheek, making her chuckle before she waved and basically bolted out of the classroom. Mr. Yoon chuckled at her antics and I got to work, grabbing both canvas to bring to the backroom before I would leave. This was our last class for today and I couldn’t wait to get home. With the thunder loud in the distance, I would love making it home before it starts raining. I didn’t want a repeat of the night when I got soaked in the rain. It’s been a week and some days since, and I was back to being healthy. Besides, Mingi certainly wouldn’t be here this time too to drive me home. We haven’t spoken yet today and I haven’t seen him in two days. It wasn’t unusual, but lately him and Wooyoung have been hanging out with Seulgi and I during our lunchbreaks. Mingi had said he was busy producing two new songs for his final exam, so I understood he was busy, but it still felt a little weird. I didn’t know where exactly to put this whole ordeal, but if he thought we were friends now, then…I guess I could give in and entertain that thought as well. It didn’t help that we’d been constantly messaging each other, and I tried to ignore the giddy feeling it left in the pit of my stomach with everything I had in myself. I didn’t want to accept the implications of what this could mean. It felt weird. There was no reason for me to overthink something so simple as Mingi and I talking and getting to know each other. If he viewed me as his friend, then I perhaps could put a little more effort into getting to know him and opening myself up as well. My mom—and Seulgi—would certainly be happy to know that I was making friends. Not that I would tell either one about Mingi—because—because. Because it wasn’t anything serious, and even if we were friends, I didn’t expect this friendship to last. Mingi was still a guy, an egoistical and self-centered guy, who could ditch you at any random moment. And he was also Yunho’s friend. That was also saying something about him—but I pushed away the menacing whisper in my head which reminded me that Mingi could be just like Yunho, that he would hurt me just like his best friend did. It was like a never-ending vicious cycle and it felt like it wouldn’t come to a stop. As if the ghost of Yunho would never truly leave me alone. Somehow he was still part of my life unwillingly, and I was letting it happen. It had been going on for too long.
I greeted Mr. Yoon with a bright smile as I got my bag and slung it over my shoulder, bowing my head slightly once I was in the doorway. He returned my smile and waved cutely; his eyes bright but tired. He was always a hard worker and sometimes when I had classes until late in the evening I would meet him at the bus stop, waiting for a man to pick him up. Mr. Yoon was a simple yet elegant man. I have always admired him and respected him, most grateful to him when he had encouraged me after I told him about wanting to start an art club at the university for the art students, but also for those who were simply interested in drawing and painting. Him and Mr. Lee, another professor I completely adored, were quick to proceed in helping me out by finding a classroom suitable enough for our shenanigans. I will forever remain grateful to them.
It was late in the afternoon and the tall stone walls of the building weren’t too helpful in providing light in the corridors as I walked down the art wing, taking a left turn before reaching a smaller circular, but wide, staircase. I quickly ascended the stairs, and was met with a wide hallway where you could head straight, left, and right. In order to reach my exit, I had to turn onto the right narrow corridor littered with doors on both sides. It was the music majors’ wing, their studios lined up on both sides of me with dark wooden doors, each having a small rotund glass where you could peek inside. These rooms were soundproof in order to not disturb anyone, and I let my hands rest in my pockets as I slowly walked down the hallway, feeling my phone with my left hand and picking it up. I took it out of my pocket and unlocked it, checking for any new messages, but there were none. Mingi still didn’t show any sings of life today and I sighed as I locked it and put away, chewing on my bottom lip. I knew he wasn’t mad at me and that I haven’t done anything lately which could’ve upset him, but the sudden weird feeling settling in my stomach felt unnerving. I felt almost restless. Head littered with questions. Was Mingi fine? What was he up to? Why was he not texting me today? I had sent him a meme I found earlier, but he hadn’t even seen it, let alone answered with a silly meme of his own. It was a never-ending whirlwind of questions in my head, distracting me from pressing matters at hand. Like what my essay about the history of arts would be about, because the deadline was right around the corner and I slacked off—once again.
I sighed as I was past the middle of the corridor by now, but the sudden faint music coming from my left catching my attention. I raised my head up and looked towards the dark wooden doors, noticing that the light was on in a studio a little behind me. I pursed my lips and as curiosity overtook my senses, I slowly shuffled backwards, towards the studio, and carefully peeked inside. I tried to remain ominous as one of my eyes looked through the glass, however, soon my whole face was almost pressed up against the small window as I was presented with Mingi’s familiar form. He was hunched forward as he stood, hands pressing against a long table, hands gripping the edge as his mouth moved fast, eyebrows furrowed, and a vein on his neck close to popping. There was a microphone in front of him as he leaned close to it, his lips almost touching it as a headphone was placed over his right ear, leaving the left free. Mingi seemed to be dressed in casual clothing, wearing beige pants, which were a tad bit too big for his form, and a black t-shirt which hung loosely around his form. A longer and shorter necklace adorned his neck, and I gulped as he raised his left hand and starting mimicking something, seemingly hitting the beat as I could feel the muffled vibrations against the door. The sound was very faint, but I could still hear his raspy voice as he rapped, licking his lips once he seemed to be done. I gulped as he was bobbing his head up and down, an attractive smirk appearing on his lips as he started slowly bouncing his body, stepping away from the desk slightly, gripping his left pantleg and then suddenly—our eyes met each other and I gasped loudly as I ducked and swiftly turned around, hurrying off the way I was initially headed towards. The stairs were in my line of sight when I suddenly heard a door opening and then— “Hey, stranger! Freeze!”
My body froze without my own accord and I cursed loudly, face flushing as I heard Mingi’s deep chuckle behind me. I knew I didn’t have much choice now that I had been caught, and so, I quickly composed myself and turned with an unphased expression on my face. Mingi had a smirk on his face as he was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed over his broad chest.
“Yeah, stranger, haven’t seen you in days.” I found myself quirking an eyebrow, and Mingi chuckled.
“I’ve been cooped up in my studio, working on this track for my finals.” He explained, reminding me that I already knew this, and now I felt awkward, “Don’t tell me you’ve missed me, doll.”
“I told you to stop calling me that!” I couldn’t help it but feel furious as Mingi watched me with a smug expression, pressing a finger against his plump lips in mock consideration.
“Hmm,” He blinked innocently, “No, doll.”
I rolled my eyes and went to turn around, but Mingi’s question stopped me, “What are you up to right now?”
“Classes are over,” I answered as I gripped the strap of my bag, “so I’m headed home.”
“By feet?” Mingi’s eyebrows slightly furrowed, and my eyes narrowed as I slightly shuffled awkwardly. We haven’t been alone like this despite talking through text, I felt a little awkward, almost as if I didn’t know what to do with myself. It was weird. It was just Mingi. Why would he make me feel like this? I still hated him.
“Of course, idiot.” I rolled my eyes as my answer was a lot snappier than intended, but Mingi just chuckled and looked past me.
“Do you have an umbrella?”
“No, why?” I asked confused and followed his line of sight as I turned around, eyes falling on the big window. It was pouring outside. Again. And I didn’t have an umbrella with me. I groaned quietly and squeezed my eyes shut for a second as I cursed every deity out there for making it rain right now out of all times. I couldn’t catch a cold again; my immune system had barely built itself back up.
“I’ll drive you home.” I heard Mingi say behind me, and when I turned around to face him, he was closer than before, the door to his studio still open. My heartbeat suddenly picked up as I watched his tall frame come closer.
“No need to do that, I’ll just wait for a bus.” I cleared my throat when his strong cologne evaded my senses, “Thanks, though.”
“Don’t be silly.” Mingi scoffed, and slightly leaned down to be eye level with me. The height difference between the two of us wasn’t that great, I’m a tall girl myself, “You’ll catch a cold again, and I don’t have enough tea bags at home to supply you for another week, again.”
“I never asked you to bring me tea.” I found myself all defensive as I looked away, feeling the heat on my cheeks. I refused to acknowledge the fact that I was blushing, but Mingi chuckled, and when I looked back at him he looked amused.
“Yet you never refused me—not even once.” His voice dropped as he teasingly leaned closer and I scoffed, slapping his chest, and pushing him back. He stumbled for a split second, but he quickly regained his balance and gave me a displeased glare.
“Whatever, I’m going—” The warm hand holding me back by my forearm took me off guard as I looked down at Mingi’s ring clad fingers wrapped around my clothed arm.
“I mean it, Y/N.” Mingi’s voice was soft and deep as I looked back up into his brown eyes, “I’m almost finished and then we can go. I promise you won’t have to wait too long.”
I took a deep breath and softly pulled my arm out of his frail hold, biting my lower lip in thought. As if on cue, there was a loud rumble of thunder which shook the building and I jumped, making Mingi raise his eyebrows at me expectantly.
“Fine, I’ll stay. You can drive me home once you’re finished.” I muttered defeated and watched as a bright smile crossed Mingi’s lips, his eyes turning crescent and almost disappearing, his front teeth protruding as he suddenly leaned forward and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, hurriedly yanking me after himself, forcing me to keep up with his long strides as he lead us towards his studio.
The feeling of his arm wrapped around my shoulders should’ve made me feel disgusted and I should have slapped it off, but I couldn’t help but soak in his warmth and the musky cologne, which was even stronger now that I was pressed into his side, the loud thumping of my heart the only sound in my ears that I could hear.
『Yeah, there's thunder in my head
And it rumbles through the dust on my shelf
Yeah, there's thunder in my head
Unfamiliar like I'm somebody else』
❱❱ Next chapter
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Ace Attorney 456 Tokyo Game Show Information Masterpost
Since I haven't seen all the information collected in one place, this post SHOULD be a comprehensive review of everything revealed today - though please let me know if I missed anything important.
New Trailer and Release Date
youtube
We got a new trailer for the 456 collection, which covers (most of) what I'm going to say in this post, and a release date of January 25, 2024!
New Features
Language Support: These games are now available in seven languages: Japanese, English, French, German, Korean, and Traditional and Simplified Chinese, along with voice dubs for each of these. These are some of the first times some of the games (in particular 5 and 6) are officially translated to many of these languages.
DLC: The previously DLC-exclusive cases Turnabout Reclaimed and Turnabout Time Traveler will be added to the game for free, along with previously DLC-exclusive costumes. You can dress up Phoenix in the Tigre outfit from the beginning!
QOL: As well, any of the quality of life features from the Great Ace Attorney Chronicles have been added to the 456 collection. This includes an episode/chapter select unlocked from the start, so you can skip straight to your favorite sections, autoplay and story mode, and a backlog/history to review recent text.
Art Gallery: The game will also include an "art gallery" which includes concept art for the games. This will also include special artworks commissioned exclusively for this collection, some of which are unlocked after beating each game and unlocking each trilogy.
Orchestra Hall: There is also an "orchestra hall" where you can listen to what seems to be the full soundtrack for all three games (though I haven't verified this), along with orchestral tracks from the 15th anniversary and 2019 orchestra concerts.
There are also two new "trilogy exclusive" songs: "Apollo Justice - A New Era Begins! 2024", and "Trucy's Theme - Bring It In, Everyone". The new "a new era begins" remix might possibly be what they're playing in the trailer. "Bring It In, Everyone" is distinct from Trucy's main theme, "Child of Magic" (listed earlier in the soundtrack list), so I have no idea what that one will be like.
Animation Studio: This new feature allows you to play around with character models, setting up different backgrounds and sprites and settings, to create whatever scene you want. This doesn't seem to have a text feature, so it just seems kind of like a worse objection.lol but with 3D sprites. (Although I'm sure the objection.lol people will find a way to rip the models in like... five minutes of the game's release)
Preorder Information
It seems we overseas people will only have the collection available digitally, but Japan seems to have physical copies along with a lot of preorder bonuses! You can find the official page here.
This includes the following:
Game Software: You can order this standalone, or with the other preorder goods, or seemingly just the goods on their own without the software included.
Original Drama CDs: Two new drama CDs are being developed for this collection! As far as I can tell, one involves the Gavinners attempting a one-night-only revival of the band (which goes poorly...), and the second involves Taka fleeing the courtroom.
Evidence and Items Set: This includes ten pieces of evidence available from the games, along with some original illustrations. As can be seen above, this includes things like the photo of Apollo and Clay from Dual Destinies, six ID photos of major characters, and a signed poster of Klavier.
As well, a new sleeve box drawn by Takuro Fuse, the character designer for 5 and 6.
That should cover everything, but please let me know if I missed any news!
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"Slowly This Time.."
Isabela Wheeler x Billy Hargrove
♡
After a few weeks of dating, Isabela and Billy go on their first date. Billy gets the idea to go dancing at the skating rink when he finds out Isabela wasn't lying about being a competitive ballroom dancer. As they're having fun, things get hot and heavy and even more so when they head back to his place..♡
♡
Warnings:
18+, MINORS DNI, HEAVY sexual tension, Mentions of sex, first time haze, description of rough sex, cursing, Billy being a dick, water works(squirting), light aftercare mention, Billy being a whole BRAT, mutual pining, p n v/no protection (WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT HOES) ILLUSTRATED DEPICTION of SUGGESTIVE CONTENT!!!
⚠️Read W/Caution ⚠️
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It was already 7:30, Isabela showing up to Hawkin's high parking lot by foot. Since there was a sidewalk that led to the front of the school, the Guatemalan girl would take the initiative to walk sometimes. It helped to clear her head in the mornings and even gave her fresh eyes. Her hips swayed quickly as she walked through the open road surrounded by some of the student body. Her eyes never left the front of her, never wasting time to glance over at people or overhear their conversations.
Today was a day of academic focus, and that trend would continue as Isa made her way to her locker. Then, and only then, did that plan throw itself out the window, Billy Hargrove showing up right next to her, only to slide big calloused hands firmly around her clothed waist. With the feel of his hands, his new girlfriend became startled, still not used to the feeling of being touched so intimately.
"Oh my gosh! Would it kill you to announce yourself every once in a while??" The studious girl whined, only to be met with that infamous cheeky grin her mischievous boyfriend possessed. Other people might not have thought much of it, but to Isa, the gesture of him even thinking to do that was something that always made her puddy in his hands.
"Where's the fun that? I like bringing excitement to your boring little life," Okay, rude. It was all playful, though, Billy smirking even more and pressing a kiss to the side of her face temple and neck while his sweet girlfriend rolled her eyes. Boring? Her life was anything but! The things she had to endure when they first met. Nova's constant She felt "tame" was a better word to use for it, especially now.
Other than that, it was like dating the historically correct Zeus. She was finding him caressing her, pressing sweet kisses everywhere he could, whispering sweet nothings in her ear. Doing whatever he can without forcing those strong hands of his down her bottoms. It was like it pained him, but could he really be blamed?
They way he gravitated towards her when she curled her long hair, the way her hips moved in a hypnotic, fluid motion while being clothed in the cutest skirts.. what were the called.. tiered? Gathered? Godet? Pleated? Whatever, her ass looked perfect in everything she put on. The way her arms hugged her notebooks, textbooks, bag, whatever she had with her worh such care. Her cherishable grin and her big, sweet brown eyes. It was enough to make the troublesome guy make her trembling puddy in his hands.
"Well, I'll let you spice up my more Friday night! We could.. go out." Isa bashfully suggested, looking away from Billy's intense blue hues. The way he looked suggestively at her.. It was like he knew what she wanted to say but enjoyed the thrill of watching her struggle to finish her all-too-simple sentence. Once Billy had enough of her adorable stuttering, his hands squeezed even more at her waist, his breath hitching once her boyfriend heard the soft whimper that escaped her kissable lips.
"If you wanna go out on a date, you could just ask, babe," He'd tease, Isa immediately groaning after. She felt like she shouldn't have to ask. She was his girlfriend, after all. He could see the look of annoyance all over her slightly freckled face. It even caused him to let out a chuckle. Isabela continued her groaning, rolling her eyes as she turned back around only to shut her locker door.
Slipping through Billy's enticing grasp, she began to head to her next class. Quickly, her boyfriend stopped her in her tracks.
"Come on, sweet girl, 'M just kidding," He'd start, Isa slightly relieved when he did stop her and eased up on the taunting. While it was charming most of the time, it did get on her nerves as well, not wanting to be satirized every time she got bashful.
"Where do you wanna go?" Hargrove would ask, Isa only taking half of a second to really thinking about it.
"We could go dancing! The nee skating they just built does dancing nights!" The way she lit up as she talked about how she wanted to spend the Friday night with him made Billy's heart swell. Even when he taunted her all to hell, she still wanted to spend time with him every chance she got. It made him want to do more for her.. like take her out dancing at the new skating joint.
.♡ ♡ ♡.
Before they both knew it, Friday came along. It was 4 p.m., Isa taking out all of the curlers she had in her hair. Billy loved when she had her hair curled. In his words, he had said it made her look elegant.. "Like a flower," Quickly, she brushed through her dark chocolate locks, grabbing her dry shampoo and dispersing it all over to make it shimmer.
She had already picked out her wardrobe for the evening. It was a short, red long sleeved slip dress and her favorite dancing heels. Most of the blisters on her feet from last month's ballroom dance camp had mostly healed, so she'd decided to give them a try again. She didn't even notice until she took off her shoes. She was so used to the feeling of pain sometimes, just bottling it up until she had to face it.
She was just finishing up, fastening the buckle of her ankle strap and putting on the flower hoop earrings he had got her when she dragged him with her to the store. He wasn't one for buying things, but the way his sweet girl looked at them when she passed by.. well why the hell not?
Isabela could hear the revv of a certain bad boy's blue Camaro from her bedroom. She peered through her window, quickly grabbing her, checking on her pastel makeup, and grabbing her purse before rushing downstairs. It might've been too obvious how excited she was. She couldn't wait to share this, something she enjoyed more than most things, something that gave her a purpose and a way to disconnect. No alcohol, no drugs, no nicotine.. just pure adrenaline. The Latina had hope Billy would experience that too, at least for a little while.
The studious dancer was out the front door by the time the blonde lover boy was out of the driver's seat. She got an eye full of what she hoped she could pull off of him tonight. He sported that satin red button-up with a white tee under it and the necklace his mother gave him. He also sported a new part of denim jeans that he had bought a week ago. The closer she had got, the closer she could smell the scent of rosewood and eucalyptus wafting to her.
Suddenly, Isa felt the brush of his hand against her rayon clad hips. Her cheeks really started to heat up when she felt the brush of Billy's soft lips against her own. Already, she was hot.. already, he was testing her. The Latina exhaled into the sweet kiss, her hands gently holding onto the fabric of his short sleeves. He broke away shortly, his hands hovering over the height of her ass. He could feel her quivering by time he pulled her closer.
Billy couldn't wrap his head around why Isabela was so shy around him. He's seen her naked and dripping wet for him for God's sake.. or maybe that wasn't it. Maybe she was trying to keep up appearances with him..? But why would she do that? She had no reason to..
Over the past 2 months, Billy had shared his shame with her on more than one occasion. Yet, her love and affection for him was unconditional.. It frustrated him that Isabela still had some of her walls up. So tonight, he was going to relieve some of that tension in her shoulders... emotionally and physically, and make her feel as good as she looked... and God, did she look good.
"A sight for sore eyes is what you are, darlin." Billy flashed that sweet grin that made Isabela's own smile quiver. With a kiss on his temple, Isa strolled over to the passenger seat, her boyfriend following soon after. He leaned over and surprised her by opening the door for her. It made that grin of her quiver again...
"Thanks, Cariño.." Isa added, maintaining her giddy smile as she carefully climbed into the passenger seat. She quickly fastened her seatbelt and adjusted her frame to the curve of the seat, as well as the hand Billy had placed on the plush of her smooth thigh. The reserved girl could tell that tonight was going to be an important one for their blossoming relationship.
♡ ♡ ♡
It wasn't long before Billy arrived at the new rink. Before that, the new couple had been jamming to whatever he had on the tape that had been left in his car the longest. It wasn't quiet either, Isa talked his ear off while he enjoyed listening to her stories about Nance and her recent change. She seemed stronger, more independent, and it inspired Isabela to be more as well. lf it was called "Neon Lights," a name that seemed rather redundant the more she thought about it. Every rink she'd ever been to had neon lights surrounding the dance floor. It made her wonder... why that name? Billy seemed to be thinking the same thing, as he briefly commented on the name.
"What the hell is that name? Couldn't they have come up with something better?" He scoffed, running a hand through his greasy hair as he scanned the parking lot for the nearest spot. Since it had just opened, everyone was at the rink, which meant it would be packed. Needless to say, Billy had found a spot soon enough, and by finding a spot, he meant finessing a parking space close to the second handicapped space. It had Isa giggling a bit. His nonchalance about where he parked and if it got him in trouble or not, even then Billy didn't care. He just wanted to get his girl inside as quickly as he could to start their fun.
While his girl practically skipped inside and onto the dance floor, Billy quickly grabbed a beer that the other partygoers were handing out like party favors. His eyes followed Isabela's pretty little body, soon settling on her sweet face as she carelessly danced into the crowd. It's refreshing to see her so in her element.
Once again, there was that sensational feeling that shot up Isabela's spine when she felt Billy's rest at her waist. With his firm grip, Billy pulled her closer, the fresh scent of beer on his lips as he brought kisses to her neck, jawline, and cheek. In that time, their sway was in unison, the beat of the music muffled as she focused on his timed breaths. Isa's right hand stroked his face, gentle and thoughtful.
In time, Billy grew restless, his hands indigently placing a firm grip lower and lower until he was teasing her clothed thigh and hips. Isa returned the favor with a wiggle of her hips so that her sweet, clothed bottom would brush up against the tip of his groin. For once, she was teasing him back, and it was not going to stop there. The fiery couple went at it until they were grinding against each other in the process.
When she heard a growl escape from Billy's lips, Isa's ears practically burned. The expression on his face was dreamy, and yet it was dripping with hunger along with the sweat on his brow. It didn't help that she couldn't get a word out either. His soft and needy kisses are pressed to her lips in such a soft manner that it makes her at a loss for those words. It was like that for a while, Isa was too busy with her handsy horndog of a boyfriend to check the time.
Isa snatched a swift look within the time window, noticing that it was 9:30. She had to be home by 10. She turned, his grasp on her getting a little tight. She could tell he was getting more and more restless, her cheeks tinting with the rough lock of their lips. A whimper escaped her lips as she pulled away.
Billy whined, of course. Looking back at his baby with much desire, Isa would've thought he was malnourished. Billy thought he was. He yearned for a taste of the young woman standing right in front of him. He craved her moans and gasps and squeals whenever he dug himself -his tongue, his hands, his cock- deep enough to send her into that needy mindset Billy knew he could always get his Isa in.
"C'mon sweetness. There's no shame in letting go right here," He'd huskily tell her, obviously lying his through his teeth just to get what he wanted. In all honesty, he didn't care whether anyone or no one was around them. He wanted to make her scream and buckle beneath him. He wanted so bad to hear her beg and tell him that she couldn't take it anymore. He wanted to see her come undone over and over until they were both sweaty and soaked.
"If you take me home now, I promise I'll give you that and more, okay?" Isa bargained, hoping he'd agree and give in. He did, not responding verbally but physically. He gave her a peck on her sweet cheeks and a surprising pat on her plush backside before standing on his own again.
Billy was quick to rush them both to the car, practically chasing Isabela through the parking lot like a masked killer. Once they got to his blue Camaro, the impatient minx would trap poor Isa against the passenger side door. Billy smirked down at her eager yet reticent expression, thinking he'd try his luck once again. Pressing a final chaste peck to those delectable lips, he withdrew just far enough to peer down at his captivating sirens through smoldering lashes that were very clearly heavy with want.
"Please..." he rumbled low enough for it to shiver her spine, sliding his broad palms down over the flaring curve of her hips to clamp around the swell of her ass in a tender yet possessive grasp. Isa whined almost immediately, attempting to set boil that her wolf was on to a low simmer.
"Amor, you promised–" He was to interrupt her, twisting a tangled lock of dark silk around his calloused finger, Billy drew her flush against his already straining fly, arousal surging shamelessly at the feel of her lithe frame molding into his.
"I did't promise a damn thing.." He immediately hissed, capturing her sweet mouth in a shamelessly filthy kiss to halt her protests, his tongue delved to coax a taste of that intoxicating nectar he crave just to feel her whimpers and swallow her moans. He even went as far as to lift up on of her deliciously lean thighs, lowering that same hand to cup the hot swell of her cunt through lace-thin panties.
"C'mon baby, a few minutes won't kill. I'll make it feel real good for you."
His straining cock twitched eagerly at her mercy beneath dress slacks as cerulean orbs smoldered with his desires barely held in check. Billy yearned for one thing.. and that was to see this spanish beauty completely fall apart under his wickedly skillful dexterities.
"That I promise.."
Even if he was trying super hard, with baited breath, Isabela declined, one of her small hands creeping around his neck only to pull them all the closer. The tease of a girl leaned in for another heated embrace only to stop and whisper her plea against his pretty kiss-bitten lips.
"Open the door, Will.."
Shit, she was serious. Billy backed off for real this time, for now, growling and grumbling in low frustration as he begrudgingly watched the vixen that was his girlfriend cutely maneuver herself over so he could open the door. He slowly opened it, his currently dark, almost sinister gaze doing its best to make her fold under it as she held it. She didn't hold it for long, her bright doe orbs flickering off to the side until she saw the door wide open.
"Thank you, lindo!" Isa responded brightly, getting a snort out of him as his eyes traveled with her until she was seated and buckled in. Then, and only then did he shut the door, slightly jogging his way to the driver's side and hopping in as quickly as possible.
The drive itself was calm, the tunes on low while a large calloused hand snaked its way in between a caramel smooth thigh. He'd take the initiative to give a deep squeeze, the poor girl wincing silently from it. He just barely caught her reaction, his lips slowly curling into an arrogant smirk. Isa, however, caught his stupid smirk, a soft pout coming to her own lips while she leaned toward the window comfortably. The silence between then was practiced, but pleasant, things only taking a turn when Billy continued his route when the Wheeler house was right there. Isa quickly caught sight of this change, looking to Billy for an answer.
"Thought you might like some alone time.. just you and me," He explained to her in a swift thought. Her bad boy continued the smooth drive, heading to his home instead. He figured,'Why not?' considering Max was sleeping over at Jane's and his "parents" were away on a trip. They had the place all to themselves.
It didn't take him long to arrive, especially with his intense motivation, Billy swifting neatly into his driveway. A millisecond went by before Billy hopped out, once again casually speeding around to the other side, only to surprise Isa by picking her up and putting her over his shoulder. A mix of a loud gasp and squeal escape her, her limbs wailing a bit out of control as she was carried inside.
The more she thought about it, the more she realized this was the first time she's been inside the Hargrove household. The atmosphere was warm, at least when no one else was there. The mellow light from the various lamps around the living room he turned on as helped too. Everything was near, and she even spotted a mini workout station she assumed only Billy used. She didn't know.. maybe his dad could carry 100 pounds of weight altogether.
By the time Isa was done thinking, Billy had entered his room, the agile latina become even more nosey while her eyes scanned everything about his room. A bag or two on the floor. The messy nightstand with paper scattered onto it. His slightly made bed. The crude posters on the wall. The boom box is in the corner. His closet was closed, so she couldn't snoop through his clothes.
Billy's eyes flashed dangerously as he closed his bedroom door, a ravenous grin spreading across his handsome features as he thought about all the things he was gonna do to the girl on his shoulder.
Before she could say much, Isa was placed onto his bed, Billy determined to get his girl into the same mood as he was in. He was quick with the kisses, hearing Isabela's audible amusement through soft whimpers and giggles that were only fueling his anticipation. Isa enjoyed the feel, obviously, realizing how deep the kisses were getting as he traveled down from her lips, all the way to her neck.
Her hands only moved from Billy's comforter to his hair when his lips became stationary at the pulsing point of her neck. The teasing kisses and nibbles to it were just the appetizer, Isa soon felt Billy try his best to form a hickey, the sucking on her pulsating flesh, sending a soft gasp through and out of her.
Soon enough, Isabela pulled away her flushed face and delirious expression all the more heightened as she struggled to pull off her heels. They were killing her now that she was sitting on the comfort of his mattress.
Luckily for the Guatemalan, Billy could practically see the wheels spinning in her head, still somewhat shy and uncertain despite her boldness earlier. It made him want to devour her all the more.
Kneeling before her, he gently grasped one slim ankle in his hands. Maintaining intense eye contact, he slowly dragged the shoe from her foot and tossed it aside. Then, he attended to the other with equal care, calloused fingers massaging her arches briefly in the process.
"Better," the sweet latina moaned in appreciation, her handsome boyfriend grinning up at her in turn.
"Yeah..?" he murmured, letting his hands trail teasingly up her calves as he rose back to sitting. A low chuckle escaped his pretty, kiss swollen lips as he watched her nod and giggle hazily.
"Yeah," Billy found himself being pulled by his face. Isa apparently decided she wanted to be kissed until she couldn't think straight, her generous boyfriend all but denying her that pleasure. Billy landed a searing, branding kiss to her lips, a sweet whine from Isabela sending a sharp flutter up his slightly worked spine.
Even after that mind hazing kiss, Billy continued adding onto the palpable sexual tension, trailing his sweetness that the adopted Wheeler called his lips down her writhing torso. All the while, big hands were working the smooth fabric or her short dress up her pretty little waist.
A soft gasp followed by a satisfying moan escaped Isabela's mouth when she felt the softness of his lips against her aching clit. A deep, vibrated chuckle fled Billy's lips as he kissed and prodded at the swollen nub, playing with it until the sounds of her needy whines were more and more prominent.
Isa was already attempting to fight Billy on this, the overwhelming pleasure in his actions never seizing to exist. She would continue her weak pleas, the hesitation in her words quickly turning into something more needy. Billy caught on to the difference, taking the initiative to press a few fingers into her aching core.
Of course, it shocked Isabela, still not used to the feeling of his fingers.. which got her thinking about where this was going to lead. Quickly though, her thoughts deteriorate into nothing from the harsh motion of the tips of Billy's digits sloppily hitting a sensitive spot that originated deep in her velvet walls.
"Oohhh-" Isa could feel her hips buck, her legs fighting against them as they shook from the threat of oveestimulation. Meanwhile, her vicious boyfriend continued to encourage her orgasm. A bunch of "You gonna come for me?"s and "You're squeezing my fingers,"s, but the big one that had her really clamping down on him was when he growled against her ear,
"Squirt for me, baby.. come on, you can do it,"
A lot happened at once, then, the heat at the lower edge of Isabela's stomach bursts, the timid girl letting out a weak squeal. Her hips lifted swiftly, a mischievous laugh escaping Hargrove as his oceans hues locked on the delicious sight of his girl coming undone from just his touch. Not only that, but the forced feeling of turning into a geyser hit Isa like a tanker truck as well. Her nose scrunched up as she felt and heard the wetness of her squirt appear and cover Billy's hand, his sheets, and any other surface it could reach.
"That's it.. There's a good girl.."
Her mind was hazy, in a continuing falling state, and his for the taking. Next thing Isa knew, Billy was all over her, his lips clinging onto every inch of her skin whilst he undressed himself. First was his satin, crimson colored shirt, his mitts in swift motion while exposing his toned chest and stomach.
He was generous, allowing the latina under him to cop a feel of what would inevitably be dominating her. Tonight was the night. The night the ashe blonde would be graced with what he was aching for over the past two and a half months. Isa came to the conclusion that she'd never be ready, which is why she gradually built herself up for it.
Fingering, manhandling, biting, oveestimulation.. but couldn't she handle him fully. This was Isabela's night to show Billy she could. With her soft palms caressing his overtly muscular stomach, her sniveling boyfriend firmly grasped one of her wrists, his oceans blues boring holes in her big Hershey's kisses. Billy was quick, swiftly guiding her hand in his boxers. She remembered being surprised he even wore boxers, knowing what the complete monster that hid in the looked like.. and boy was he terrifying.
A quick pull at his briefs and his package was being presented in full, glorious view. All eight and a half inches deliciously aroused to the brim. The pre was practically drooling from him. It was everything she hoped for. Sloppy and needy, and oh so ready for the struggle. Oh, Billy could feel himself throb at the thought.
♡ ♡ ♡
He was quick with his demands.
"Keep your legs spread," as he pushed her plsyh thighs apart to bring himself in between her.
"Move your hands.." as he firmly grasps her wrists in one hand and brings them over her head.
"Ge it wet for me, baby," as he grabs the base of himself, sloppily tapping against her soaked folds until her clit was swollen enough to alert her to start gushing.
"Atta girrl~" He praised wantonly, watching as her flood gated opened once again for him. Surely enough, it didn't take Billt much time to lather himself in, pumping his sopping wet cock with his hand to put on a show for his girl. Conversely, Isa was eating it up, listening to the sounds he'd make as he teased her so effortlessly.
"Billy.." Isa whined, her eyes weary of his because of her awareness. She was aware of how she looked, and she looked needy.. which didn't help because she was. Billy's sore eyes snapped to hers, running up hee body before he leaned down to speak.
"What is it, mama..? You ready for me?" He quested rhetorically, a smirk easily showing on his pretty lips. When Isa nodded, Billy gently shook his head, his eyes -once again- telling her everything she needed to know.
"What do you want, baby? You want this dick inside you..?" He pressed, his hips slowly grinding against her heated entrance to keep the pleasure constant. Her mewling got louder, Billy once against surprising his sweet girlfriend by wrapping his other hands around her throat. A light squeeze, that was all, but it was enough to get her talk for him.
"Tell me-"
"Y-yes! I want you inside me- I want it!" She admitted, her voice still soft enough for him to only catch her words. He nodded himself, letting her go and one again grabbing the base of his cock once more. Lining himself up, Billy serged his tip inside her entrance. He was slow, knowing how nervous she still must've been considering how tight she was.
Isa winced, her hands tightly gripping the sheets above her head. It was already a lot, if she was honest with herself. Her body was trembling, even if Billy was doing his best to make her comfortable. So far, Billy was proud of his girl, the brunette taking it the way he was giving it to her. They were both surprised he managed to fit, but there were still many inches to go. Isa continued to hold her breath, soft affirmations leaping off of Billy's tongue while his fingers slithered their way to her clit. A swift most continued against it while he pushed further and further. He wasn't even half away in and he was already stretching her to her limit.
"F-fuck- hold on, amor~" the sweet latina huffed, her eyes fluttering all over the place while she got used to his width. She anticipated him plowing her breath away, but they haven't even gotten that far yet. Billy waited, patience really seeming like a virtue in this moment the way he held back for her. Although it wasn't long until she gave Billy the go-ahead, hearing Isabela's pleas to continue while being all too eager to oblige.
He was quick for her, her hold on his navy blue sheets mighty enough to pull them off of his mattress. When he bottomed her out, a moan escaped both of them, Billy acknowledging tur snug fit her velvet walls put him in. It hot.. fuck, it was more than hot. It felt sinister to be this deep in someone. Not that he hasn't done it before. God knows how many men and women who's world he's rocked. In the same rushed thought, Billy had realized this I'd thr longest he's gone without thoroughly fucking someone's brains out. Two and a half months of salivating, tortous foreplay with this hot and sweet piece of latina that was under him squirming.. helplessly.
Speaking of, Billy watched the tears stream down her cheeks even as she wrapped her pretty legs around his waist. It was time.
"You ready..?" Billy suggested, wanting her to be as comfortable as possible. To him, it was no fun wrecking her unless she was absolutely on board. It was Billy's charming smile and reddened face that had her nodding, seeing the effect she had on him.
♡ "Mhmm" ♡
He got going in an unhurried manner, subconsciously cautious and barely even moving his hips in rhythm with hers. It was sweet like this, his calloused hands moving up to grasp her airy little wrists only to just hold them in play. It was long after that still he could his lips over hers, kissing her in such a passionate way that it had her moaning in pleasure. He kept at it, only stopping when he felt her slick juices cover his manhood. It was hot and heavy, and DEFINITELY plenty to get him to change his pace. As he quickened his hips, her moans and whimpers got louder.
It was a lot, to say the least. Isabela found herself with her back arched and the butterflies in her stomach swarming. Exce0t this time, it was a slower built than when he was fingering the shit out of her. It was a fight between pleasure and pain.. so much pleasure to where it became painful.
"Billly!" She yelped, the grip her legs had on his waist loosening as he thrusts turned into straight pistons.
"You're so goddamn tight for me baby- milking my fucking dick for all it's worth.." he praised gruffly, wasting no time in setting a brisk pace.
Snapping his cock in and out powerfully, the rhythmic slap of flesh echoed off the walls as he took her hard and thorough. All the while, his siren blue orbs gazed appreciatively over her breasts. It didn't matter how small they were. They were gorgeous during their rhythmic bounce in contrast to his own cadenced and gradually harsh thrusts. He quick to make it rough, freeing one of her hands just to snake his own behind her head to firmly grip a chunk of her cocoa colored locks of hers.
"Tell me who owns this pretty pussy," he gritted out, sweat-slick from steam and exertion. Claiming her lips in a ravaging kiss, he swallowed her cries of pleasure. His fingers dug into soft skin, he plunged deeper still, eyes rolling back at the exquisite velvet glove pressure building him swiftly closer once again.
"Eres dueño de mi cuerpo, amor. ¡Por favor llévame! Quiero ser tuyo~" She spoke deeply against her lips. Only for him to stop, remaining balls deep and grinding every bit of himself inside of her aching slit.
"What do I do to you, huh?" He'd question breathlessly, her the hand tangled through her hair sliding downward to pull her againsr him further.
"Use your words, ma.."
It took her a moment to answer, her thoughts racing around her own mind as she attempted to piece together a sentence while the bully that was her boyfriend remained stubborn.
"Me vuelves loca, amor. He querido esto durante mucho tiempo... tenerte dentro de mí... tomarme como tuyo"
He didn't understand a word she said, but he knew enough to know what she was really saying.
'I love you and I want to be yours. I want you to make me yours. Please will you make me yours?'
The way she sounded was needy and breathless, and Billy aimed for his sweet girl to be satisfied and breathless and nothing else.
"Shit baby, you trying to kill me?" Billy growled out in awe and fresh arousal, almsot feeling as if he was about to blow beneath her eager ministrations. Clearly, his little vixen had an even bigger appetite than he suspected. Not that he was complaining, far from it. Gripping her stationary hips firmly, he planted his feet and started thrusting to feel each delicious stroke with sharp, focused drives. Isa went back to whimpering helpless, feeling herself ger pushed further and further to the end of her short fuse.
"Fuck yeah, just like that. Take me till you break, sweetness," he snarled up at her, eyes closed in bliss as her tight sheath clutched at him in a pornographic rhythm.
His hands roamed greedily over her bouncing breasts, pinching her nipples into tight beads as encouragement to get her to scream for it. The lewd squelching sounds of their coupling filled the air, mingling with her sinful cries.
"God you feel so fucking good, takin' this dick so well, Isa," he grunted proudly.
Snapping his hips straight into hers to grind directly into her sweet spot, he smirked in masculine triumph at the shriek it drew from deep in her throat.
"You wanna cum again already? Fucking slur aren't you?? You want to cum all over me so fucking bad."
He contined with his mocking, watching the rest of her blood rush to her already cherry red face. He had a feeling shed respond happily to his teasing, testing it out a few times back when she'd only let him kiss her. It was so cute how her nose scrunched up in embarrassment, just like it did in the moment.
That pretty little back of hers arched, giving her sly sweetheart to ram himself further inside. He watched the effect, while he mindless shot every bit of his smoldering hot seed into her core. Her curls were messy, in her face and covering her pretty mouth, which was trying its best not to let out another blood heating squeal.
All the pleasure practically shot up her body the way her thighs shook before clamping down on instinct, a fresh gush of fluids drenching them both gloriously. So. Fucking. Goregous. It's been a while since he made someone cum like that.. God, and he couldn't wait to practically see her soul leave her body again.
He was quick to comfort her, watching more tears build up in globs before pouring down her flushed face. He still wasn't good at the 'word comforting thing,' or whatever the hell she called it, but he was pretty good at holding her. A few kisses to her temples, one sweet peck on the lips and another one on her neck for good measure. Then he scooped her up, not pulling out until he knew she was okay.
Isa noticed all of these things, his actions quite reassuring in the sense that he actually listened to her when she spoke about this stuff. It was just him staring at her. His eyes lowered as if he was only thinking about taking her right then there. That's all she thought it was, but really, he was just.. thinking.
Thinking about how he could excute that.. in his own way. She was always open with him, expressing her fears to him.. about him. For a while, he didn't know how to take it. It slightly missed him off about every little thing she tried to change.
His bad habits, mostly. His high sex drive, his anger issues, the drinking, and smoking. All of it. Isa admitted to herself that she was pushy, but she was never demanding. She always let him take his time.
It was always his decision to make.. just with her big brown eyes and sweet persuasion, staring him down every time he thought about it.
So even after the fights that would have her in tears by the end of it, he'd still come back to her and tell her, "I can't promise this shit will be easy for me.. but I want to.. try,"
And her saying back, "I don't expect to he easy, Bills.."
It was her accepting him with open arms, and so this is what it would turn into. He was still a very heavy work on progress, but he was proud to say he barely takes a sip of beer anymore, he attempts to keep his cool, and he only smokes the occasional cigarette every 3 weeks. Yeah it's a very slow go, but it's working.. because she believed him. Now he takes everything she says to heart.
And she saw that.
"..You're so lucky I take the pill,"
♡ ♡ ♡
Within two or three hours Isa and Billy managed to get out of bed and get themselves clean, his lovely little latina making her way over to his closet to snoop of a comfortable shirt.
"Jeez, don't you have anything that you can't rip off so easily?" Billy laughed at that one, his footsteps getting closer and closer until he was beside her with on arm around Isa's waist.
"Yeah yeah. You say that, but you love the way I dress.." He fired back, hus sweet girlfriend peeping the genuine smile that played on his pretty lips. It was enough to have her smiling too. Isa continued her looking, Billy quickly taking over by handing her a pear of sweatpants and one of his loose white tees.
"Guess your dressing like me tonight.."
It took her a minute to realize what he was implying, Isa slowly and lightly grapsing the clothes from Billy's palms. Her gaze slightly widened when she understood his words, covering her nude figure in slightly embarrassment.
"You.. want me to stay over?" Isa asked, still not believing him. Billy rolled his eyes, his small smirk on his face when he looked back at her.
"Unless you want me to drive you home at 12:30 in the morning.
After that, Isa quickly put on his clothes, slightly trugfling even though they were so loose. It didn't help that her excitement had her hopping all over the place. Plopping herself on the edge of his bed, Isa began to pull up her hair. She was quick to braid it back, staring in the mirror he had against the wall.
All the while, Billy himself relaxed against his fresh pillow, content in watching his girl get ready for bed. It wasn't long, though, her quick routine over before he knew it. She crawled to him, shuffling herself under the new comforter she helped him put on while she got comfortable.
She's only ever stayed over to help him study. It was only for a few hours too. Never did she stay over at his place. He would either make up some excuse or just flat out say no.
She always wondered why, but whenever she tried to pry, he was standoffish, defensive even. She had suspected it had something to do with his parents, but she wasn't sure. Tonight wasn't the night for that, though. She could ask questions another time.
Tonight was the time to bask in new beginnings, Isabela proudly snuggling up to her exhausted boyfriend. Her hand over his chest while his hand reached over to hold that very hand.
"Sorry I kept you up so late," Isabela soft whispered, her eyes slowly closing a she let the fatigue of the night finally hit her. Billy himself was way ahead of her, pullling her even closer before answering.
Tag List:
"Shut up, you know I loved every second of it," Her answered without really thinking, due to his exhaustion. Even with that, she knew he meant it, smiling into the pillow harder as they both drifted to sleep, their relationship shifting as night did with the day.
.♡ ♡ ♡.
.
.
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Thank you so much for reading, if yoy made it all the way through! It was difficult to finish this, and it probably came out a bit rushed but I hope you like it! From now on I'll be giving y'all fics like I do my art, in pieces! Thanks for being patient and thank you for enjoy my content! I can't wait to give you more of these two and the others! Yall have a good day and I'll see you later!♡ ENJOYYY
@xxbutdaddyilovehimxx @buckysgrace @unamused-boss @gri959 @periwinkle-quill
#stangerthingsoc#stranger things#original character#stranger things art#artists on tumblr#original art#billy hargrove x reader#artwork#billy hargrove x oc#billy hargove imagine#billy hargrove#billy hargove smut#billy hargrove x original character#cc x oc#oc x canon#curvy and cute#suggestive art#i put my whole ass crack into this :>#silly but sweet#me throwing things at the wall to see what sticks#billyyyyyy#billy hargrove fanfiction#billy hargrove x f!reader#billy hargrove x fem!oc#oc x cc#oc#original character x canon character#canon x oc#digital art#billy hargrove imagine
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《The strong association of PCOS with cis womanhood, the defining of it as a disorder or syndrome, and its framing as a “women’s health issue” obscures the fact that PCOS is a natural hormonal variation, an endocrine difference that is illustrated through secondary sex characteristics.
During my initial search for resources and community, I also learned that PCOS, given its characterization as a hormonal variance, falls under the intersex umbrella. This intersex umbrella covers a wide range of “individuals born with a hormonal, chromosomal, gonadal or genital variation which is considered outside of the male and female norms,” and PCOS meets that definition.
This is not an attempt to sway every person who has PCOS to identify themselves as intersex—though it is an acknowledgment that we have the option and the right to do so if it rings true to us. Rather, this is to say that shifting my perspective on PCOS and viewing it through an intersex lens allowed me to better understand it as a natural human variation rather than an affliction causing my body to do the “wrong” thing.
“I believe that someone with PCOS has every right to use the term intersex for themselves if they want, but I also understand it if they don’t,” said writer and intersex advocate Amanda Saenz.
“As an advocate and an intersex person, I opt to use a definition of intersex that is open ended and expansive,” Saenz explains. “The experiences that a term like ‘intersex’ hopes to define include differences in hormonal production and hormone reception, and the phenotypic effects these differences have on the body. To me, this is inclusive of things like PCOS.”
Discussing PCOS in this way is often met with indignation and resistance. Our society has a hard time separating gender from sex. This has resulted in a widespread misunderstanding of intersex identity as equivalent to transgender identity. Many who vehemently resist the idea of PCOS being under the intersex umbrella do so because they categorically link “female” with “woman,” and therefore misinterpret any acceptance of intersex identity as a denial of womanhood. Moreover, the stigma around and marginalization of intersex communities prevents many people from feeling comfortable with embracing it.
“You can be intersex and cisgender, transgender, or nonbinary. The ‘opposite’ of intersex is endosex, not cisgender,” explained Eshe Kiama Zuri, founder of U.K. Mutual Aid. As a nonbinary intersex person, Zuri approaches these ideas with a clear understanding of how the bodies of intersex individuals as well as many people with PCOS interrupt binary thinking about both sex and gender.
“The resistance to PCOS falling under the intersex umbrella is due to a white supremacist society’s desperation to cling to binary genders, which we know [have been] used as a colonial tool of control,” they offer.
The same medical and surgical interventions that legislators seek to ban trans and nonbinary people from accessing—which would be gender-affirming, life-saving care for them—are often forced on intersex infants and children who are unable to consent. This is done in efforts to align intersex bodies with social expectations of female and male, man and woman; the same logic undergirds the societal and medical pressure to “feminize” the female-assigned bodies of PCOS patients.
PCOS is “shockingly common [and] the most frequently occurring hormone-related disorder.” However, according to Medical News Today, “up to 75% of [people] with PCOS do not receive a diagnosis for their condition.” If we were to understand and accept something like PCOS as intersex, considering how “shockingly common” it is, the dominant idea of binary sex, with intersex being thought of as nothing more than a fringe occurrence, would be shattered.
“PCOS is only one of many conditions that could fall under the intersex umbrella, and care for people with PCOS would be considerably better if it wasn’t for the forced gendering and resistance to providing actual support for people with PCOS, even if it challenges society’s ideas of gender,” says Zuri.
Combating myths built around the gender and sex binaries would create more space to understand PCOS traits as part of normal human variation, rather than inherent problems to be fixed, symptoms to be eradicated. As Zuri so beautifully put it, “When we start to accept that this is not a body behaving ‘wrong’ and it is just a body, we stop blaming and punishing people for how their bodies work and start challenging societal expectations.”》
I was fucking right!
#PCOS#Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome#polycystic ovary syndrome#Intersex#female-assigned intersex#afab intersex#polycystic ovarian syndrome
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01/29/2024 OFMD Crew Recap
TLDR; RenewAsACrew/SaveOFMDCrew; UK News; Current UK Efforts; How to Help the UK Crew; Pets for Pirates/ Cast & Crew Sightings; Upcoming Events; Jan 30 Push the Petition!; #OurFlagMeansDeadloch; #OurCrewMakesADifference; How To Help; Stats and Trends; Love Notes; Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika
Wow all. We had so much going on today I had to start a draft up way early. I hope I caught it all-- as usual please let me know if I didn't!
== Save OFMD Crew==
So it looks like the sun is finally setting on #RenewAsACrew and #SaveOFMDCrew is taking their place. I'm going to include their infographics from twitter here. I'm reaching out to them regarding other socials so I'll update this once I have them. One thing I notice from reading through all this is that these folks are using our #SaveOFMD hashtag that we've been using along with #RenewAsACrew to help keep the brand up, which is great! I know that was something a lot of us were concerned about.
SaveOFMD Crew Instagram
SaveOFMD Crew Twitter
==UK News==
Thanks @lamentus1 for keeping us up to speed on what's going on with the UK Crew!
= News =
In the UK our focus is mainly on promoting the show since season 2 will arrive here on Monday night. News wise one of our UK fans @LisaHafey wrote this great article for essentially pop ‘Our Flag Means Death’ Set To Make Bittersweet Return To BBC2 Amid Fan Efforts To Find The Show A Safe Harbour No word yet on Wee John Wednesdays start date yet, but he seemed keen to do a podcast afterwards so fingers crossed!
= Current UK Crew Efforts =
The UK Crew has been working hard tweeting at Netflix and Netflix UK, Amazon Prime and Amazon Prime UK, and Apple TV+ using the following hashtags: #renewasacrew, #saveofmd #adoptourcrew
We have also been tweeting about the UK actors in the show, focusing on the other shows they’ve been in and hoping to gain viewers from other fandoms. Example Tweets you're welcome to use! @LibbyRoseITM made some illustrations to show the other characters each had played which we also tweeted. Twitter Thread:
= How to Help =
**Let's make the S2 release a HUGE success!** We'll be tweeting #RewatchAsACrew #OurFlagBBC in addition to the usual. Season 2 will start at 10pm on Monday Feb 5, so that’s 5pm ET and 2pm PT. We'd really like to see a huge boost in viewers to help support #AdoptOurCrew! We think a lot rides on how well it’s received in the UK. **We have a few resources including:** Tumblr: 6 reasons why you should watch OFMD Twitter: 6 reasons why you should watch OFMD Feel free to use the images above to tweet about UK actors! **Reach out to your local Students!** We had the idea of getting OFMD fans who are students to put Our Flag Means Death posters up around campus. Perhaps they can also see if the LGBT student groups can help to promote the show. So we are on the lookout for students!
= Upcoming Efforts =
We also want to tweet/email at the UK TV guides to tell them how much we love the show. Getting some contacts together.
= Outside the US Support =
For those outside the UK, There's a lovely guide on how to watch with iPlayer as well if you want to support the efforts - Thanks @reallygoodplants
==Pets for Pirates==
There was an AMAZING turnout today for #PetsForPirates. If you wanna checkout the thread on twitter and you have a login you can visit: #PetsForPirates There were so many pets to share I couldn't put all the pictures up here or Tumblr would yell at me, so instead, I'm just adding some highlights! TW: There is a Spider in there, I put it near the end in case you wanted to skip by (I love spiders but just wanted to warn because I know there are some folks with phobias)
== Cast And Crew Sightings ==
The main cast sighting I'd like to point out today is the lovely Damien Gerard, our Father Teach, participated in the #PetsForPirates with his sweet babies! It was so sweet to see him coming out to support everyone! Thank you @damientgerard!
==Upcoming Events==
Tomorrow there will be some efforts to really push the petition! Please see below and thanks to @LCWebsXOXO on twitter for the info!
Renew As A Crew was kind enough to also share a QR Code you can use to help people get to the petition! Looks like 100K is the next goal!
==Twitter Watch Parties==
=Our Flag Means Deadloch Watch Party=
Hey all! New Watch Party tomorrow 01/30/24 at 9 PM GMT (1 PM PST, 4PM EST). Episodes 1-2 for the first night, 2 a night after. Deadloch is available on AmazonPrime
Watch Party Hashtags:
#OurFlagMeansDeadloch
#SaveOFMD
#AdoptOurCrew
== UK Watch Party ==
Wanna join in the fun with the UK folk?
Place: As mentioned above you can do so using this lovely guide on how to watch with iPlayer as well if you want to support the efforts - Thanks @reallygoodplants Time: Season 2 will start at 10pm GMT on Monday Feb 5, so that’s 5pm ET and 2pm PT.
Watch PartyHashtags:
#RewatchAsACrew
#OurFlagBBC
SaveOFMD
AdoptOurCrew
RenewAsACrew
==StewAsACrew==
This is still in the works, but apparently Feb 4th is U.S. National Homemade Soup Day! @sgtblackbirdpie has been kind enough to let us know more information once it's available!
== Articles ==
‘Our Flag Means Death’ Set To Make Bittersweet Return To BBC2 Amid Fan Efforts To Find The Show A Safe Harbour
The $20,000 Reason That ‘Our Flag Means Death’ Might Score a Resurrection
Queer Fans Fight to Keep Our Flag Means Death Afloat
Save Our Show! Why Fans Fight Back When Shows Are Cancelled ty @starrynights137 for bringing this one up!
==Our Crew Makes A Difference ==
New Fundraiser dropped to help Gaza with eSIM purchases and Sanitary Products by OurFlagMakesADifference. They've already helped fund multiple campaigns to help the people of Gaza.
BTW when I post this, we're already at $900/8000 HOLY. MOLY ALL!
==How to Help ==
How To Help Save OFMD Task List - US How to Help Save OFMD Task List - Outside US ^-- These will be updated with items from todays recap tomorrow morning.
==Queerties Reminder==
Since these are going on for a while I'm gonna add them to the daily task list so you can reference them there. OFMD Categories: TV Comedy Best TV Performance Taika/Rhys verse: Kaimana for Best Film Performance in Next Goal Wins!
==STATS and TRENDS==
Some cool stats people are using for tweeting netflix, thx @peachilys!
Also #PetsForPirates and #AdoptOurCrew did really great today!
== Love Notes ==
Wow. Just wow. Look at this list of stuff. Please pat yourselves on the back. Do you see this? This is crazy. Tomorrow marks day 21 in the Gravy Basket and you all have blown everything OUT OF THE DAMN WATER. Seriously, can I even say anything that this entire recap doesn't tell you already? You are WONDERFUL HUMAN BEINGS.
Say it out loud: "I am awesome, I am kind, I am creative, I am generous, I am gorgeous!" CAUSE YOU ARE!
Everyone's been talking about feeling like tomorrow is gonna be a good day and I'm with them! Be safe, get some rest, all the love my friends!
==Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika==
Okay so I had different plans tonight but the SaveOFMD crew threw me for a loop so we're gonna go with a combo gif tonight because I've used all my 30 images. Courtesy of @celluloidbroomcloset on this post.
#ofmd daily recaps#ofmd daily recap#ofmd#our flag means death#stede bonnet#gentlebeard#renew as a crew#edward teach#save ofmd#rhys darby#blackbonnet#save our flag means death#renewasacrew#adopt our crew#uk crew#petsforpirates
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Parts language is not dehumanizing, but the way people in the plural community treat parts language makes me feel dehumanized as a person who uses parts language.
I was reading that damn "Why the Theory of Structural Dissociation is Ableist" article written by Stronghold and released by the plural association (bluntly, I find it to be a very poorly written article - not in its strongly worded opinions, but because it spreads blatant misinformation regarding the success of final fusion based on a study the author did not understand, and I also find the piece to be incredibly ableist against systems who use parts language and seek final fusion).
Specifically, I want to talk about this paragraph from the article today, as I find it illustrates a lot of the problems that I have encountered in the plural community with regards to parts language:
Although I do not think personalities is the right term for us, nor is the word parts. It is derogatory, dehumanizing & it is taking away from our autonomy, roles and authenticity as individuals. And so I often wonder whether the alter integration they desire, equals just not being Plural anymore in the minds of the writers of Structural dissociation. If it does, it makes sense to diminish us to parts. And it also makes sense to claim “no one has to go away”, if they never believed we are separated in the first place. After all, it is the ‘experience of separation’, not actual separation, as they say, we did not split off. So was using the term ‘parts’ in 1987 progressive, or a step to further diminish, gaslight and silence us?
While I find questioning the intentions of the authors valuable and think it is important to explore whether any given medical intervention is truly aimed at individual wellbeing or whether its goal is normality and conforming to ableist ideas of what health looks like, I find it completely unnecessary to shit on parts language in order to do that.
This idea that I or any other system which uses parts language is "diminished" to parts carries the implication that parts are something less-than, undesirable, or have less value than systems which are not parts. This narrative is surprisingly anti-system for an organization which claims to be "empowering those with Dissociative Identity Disorder, OSDD and all other forms, labels and experiences of Plurality."
I am not diminished to parts; my parts are me, and I am a person. I cannot be diminished by my own personhood.
Additionally, the idea that parts language is "derogatory, dehumanizing, and takes away from our autonomy, roles, and authenticity as individuals" may imply that systems which use parts language are self-harming, that they are being derogatory and dehumanizing towards themselves, and stripping themselves of their own autonomy and individuality. This is an extremely negative and biased view of not only parts language but also those who use parts language as well. I use parts language for myself out of self-love, not hate.
Further, if we are to acknowledge plurality as a spectrum, then even if parts language really did mean system members were less individual from each other, how is that a bad thing? Median systems have long existed and have described their experiences as "different versions of me" or "different modes"; why is this fine, but saying you have parts as a system is not? Why is there such a focus on individuality and personhood to the point that it excludes those systems who do not experience their systemhood in that way? In what way is that inclusive?
Parts language should not be forced onto anyone, as it is important in general not to force a view of self onto someone that does not align with how they identify; yet, it feels as though people completely forget that rule when sentiments such as "your system members are 100% different people" or "calling your system members parts is derogatory and you are dehumanizing them" are pushed onto people as some sort of objective truth. That is just not how my system works; It would be just as wrong to say my system is not parts as it would be to say to a system who is not parts that they're actually parts.
Critiquing the language which medical professionals use to describe the experiences of their patients has its place, absolutely, however you must also have a level of respect for the people who relate to and use that language that all too often is lacking.
#didosdd#parts language#ableism#dissociative identity disorder#complex dissociative disorder#syscourse#?
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