#i have no friends at my new school 😕

[adoresia]

i don't know why but you give off such yellow vibes🤔 i feel like you're such a fun, bubbly person.

i don't know if it's because of the bachira theme or profile picture, but you do give off bee vibes🤔🤔

VHAAATT wait i an giggling and twirling my hair and all of the above??? I QM THE BEE 🐝 im trademarking thid emoji and every other yellow emoji now 💛💛🌻⭐️🌟🐝

ira i lob you 💛💛💛 guys am i fun and bubbly??? i thought i was really awkward is this my awakening

[danibeanie]

REAL astro notes 😼

-having a stellium in your 4th house in your solar return chart means that your not gonna wanna go out at all. I have this and I don’t even want to hang out with friends, go to the gym, or school😭

-scorpio moons and their possessiveness.. let’s talk about it😕

-I noticed that gym influencers that naturally have a nice shape before working out have some type of Jupiter influence. It’s easier for them to incorporate the weight into their physique

-mars conjunct Jupiter

moon conjunct Jupiter

venus conjunct Jupiter

-cancer venus natives tend to let people walk all over them, especially if it’s someone they were romantically involved with.

-the libra moon woman I’ve encountered tend to have a bigger chest and i think it’s because of the venusian influence 😭

-cancer moon women tend to have a tiny face , I feel as if feminine features are very highlighted when it comes to this placement.

-lilith conjunct sun,moon or on ascendent can give darker features.

-moon conjunct venus synastry feels so homey, I feel like I can be myself with this person without any judgment.

-the people I usually encounter at the gym or people that end up taking me places/giving me rides, fall into my 6th house or MY planets fall into their 6th house. (6th house is daily routines)

-once a taurus placement gets hurt it’s hard for them to open up to new relationships /adapt to change 😕

-pisces placements can be very delusional, but part of their delusion is mixed with their strong empathy towards others. I tend to believe they see the world with rose colored glasses. you can’t help but question their motives it’s really a mystery with them.

-one thing about gemini placements is that they’ll be 100% real when it comes to friendships. We will tell you if your right or wrong

-moon conjunct mercury are some of the most honest people you’ll ever meet

-sun conjunct venus woman are naturally put on the spotlight for their charisma and beauty❤️‍🔥

-sag mercury’s are wild.. like y’all just say anything and the room goes quiet.. sister sign things🤗

[linaslivery]

hi

could you pls write a smau about a gymnast and lando

౨ৎHATE YOU LESS, LOVE YOU MORE౨ৎ

masterlist / rules / requests & talks with me!

SUMMARY౨ৎ y/n and lando hate each other. at least that’s what they want people to think. actually, they are in a relationship with each other

PAIRING ౨ৎ lando norris x gymnast!fem!reader

WARNINGS ౨ৎ none!

FACE CLAIM ౨ৎ Sunisa Lee

A/N ౨ৎ a lot of lando love on my account lately! might make that change 😊😊 also, ik sunisa is team usa but for the sake of the story pretend she is for britain 🥹

INSTAGRAM

y/n_l/n ✔︎

liked by simonebiles, olympics, nike, and others

y/n_l/n So excited to represent Britain for Paris 2024! ����🇧 the new leo smacks 😵‍💫😵‍💫

2,346 comments

username1 SHE’S BACK!!

username2 i keep forgetting she is british and not from the usa 😭

→ username3 SHE’S NOT?? → username4 nope! she goes to college in the usa for the gymnastics program but she is a british citizen :) → username5 my life has been a lie

landonorris ✔︎ it’s not your colour tbh 🫤 🫤

→ y/n_l/n ✔︎ neither is orange but here we are 🤷‍♀️ → oscarpiastri ✔︎ oh god here we go → landonorris ✔︎ @ y/n_l/n it’s papaya actually → y/n_l/n ✔︎ “it’s papaya actually “ 🤓 ☝️ → landonorris ✔︎ your not funny → y/n_l/n ✔︎ *you’re → oscarpiastri @ mclaren media train this man. i'm at my limit. → username6 can anyone explain why they hate each other so much?? 😭 → username7 nvm that, someone send oscar help that hes screaming for

IMESSAGES

INSTAGRAM

y/n_l/n ✔︎

liked by lilyzniemer, oscarpiastri, livvydunne, and others

y/n_l/n olympics are underway 👀

1,985 comments

landonorris ✔︎ i hope you fall

→ y/n_l/n ✔︎ what a supportive companion 😍 love you lan 😘 → landonorris ✔︎ i hate you too 😘 😘 → username8 these guys have no chill bro 😭

lilyzniemer the heart 🫶

→ y/n_l/n ✔︎ for my best girl ❤️ → oscarpiastri ✔︎ excuse you? → y/n_l/n ✔︎ you are excused.

username10 seriously, does anyone know why lando and y/n don’t like each other?? they are from such polar opposite sports 😭

username11 i heard from somewhere that they were friends in school but had a falling out for some reason… might be due to their respective sports.

IMESSAGES

INSTAGRAM

y/n_l/n ✔︎

liked by lando.jpeg, jadecarey, lindsayhoran, and others

y/n_l/n rest and relaxation 😴

3,001 comments

username12 UHMMM…

username13 Miss Y/N L/N. Who the fuck is that man?

landonorris did you save croissant for me?

→ y/n_l/n ✔︎ i did actually → landonorris then where is it 🤨 → y/n_l/n ✔︎ ready to be shoved up your fucking ass → mclaren ✔︎ i’m tired. → username14 HELP NOT THE MCLAREN ADMIN BEING OVER THEM. → landonorris ✔︎ :( → username15 THE SAD FACE 😭😭 → username16 anyone else find it strange lando isn’t commenting about the guy in the photos? i mean he teases her all the time and to just have nothing now is so strange → username17 stay delusional!!

username16 lando.jpeg like??? 🤨📸

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

landonorris ✔︎

liked by mclaren, carlosainz55, maxfewtrell, and others

landonorris J'adore Paris 🥐

3,670 comments

username17 i think lando is loving something else other than paris…

→ landonorris ✔︎ no

username18 THE MUSEUM DATE?? 🙁🙁

username19 idk who that girl is but i wish i was her 😕

y/n_l/n ✔︎ the bucket hats need to be retired.

→ landonorris ✔︎ uhhhmm??? no?? some guy said i look handsome. → y/n_l/n ✔︎ was the man a figment of your imagination? → landonorris ✔︎ rude 😒

maxfewtrell ✔︎ upset i don’t get any picture credits. i was the third wheel for nothing.

username20 WHO IS THAT GIRL??

username21 i’m telling you guys it’s y/n and when they reveal it they will be laughing in our faces.

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

y/n_l/n ✔︎

liked by landonorris, lauriehernandez, alyraisman, and others

y/n_l/n better than gold 🩷🥇

tagged ; landonorris

2,560 comments

username22 WHAT ON EARTH

→ username23 IS GOING ON → username24 IN THE HOUSE OF COMMONS

oscarpiastri ✔︎ what in the world.

→ username25 HELPP → username26 i think oscar finally lost it 😭😭

carlosainz55 ✔︎ put a jumpscare warning next time 😢

→ landonorris ✔︎ sorry mate, if you’re on her account you’ll be seeing her quite a lot → carlosainz55 ✔︎ yeah! i totally meant Y/N! → landonorris ✔︎ 🤨 → y/n_l/n ✔︎ HAHA POINT AND LAUGH EVERYONE!

landonorris ✔︎

liked by y/n_l/n, charles_leclerc, f1, and others

landonorris she’s a little weird and kind of mean to me but i love her 🙃

tagged ; y/n_l/n

3,734 comments

username27 IT’S CONFIRMED GUYS!!

username28 more y/nlando content ??? it really is the best day ever.

y/n_l/n ✔︎ i’m not mean 🙁🙁

→ landonorris you literally made me choke on my spaghetti. → y/n_l/n ✔︎ because you were outstanded by my beauty 😍 → landonorris ✔︎ maybe i was 🫶 → y/n_l/n ✔︎ stop i’m blushing 🫣🩷 → osarpiastri ✔︎ i missed it when you two together was a secret. → landonorris ✔︎ someone is grumpy. @ y/n_l/n get lily to call him so he stops being a baby → maxverstappen1 ✔︎ didn’t you cry when she got the first place medal? → landonorris ✔︎ didn’t you retire from the australian gp? → username29 SHOTS FIRED 😭 → username30 sassy lando is back → y/n_l/n ✔︎ oh sweetheart, he sadly never left. → landonorris ✔︎ sadly??

[inf3ct3dd]

ellie headcanons pt.3,,,!!

warnings: mentions of boobs, ass (lmao) , mild sexual content, use of the d-slur (jokingly)

content: loser!ellie x reader :3 my pookieeee

authors note: these r actually my favorite things to write ever like im so glad yall like them :333

pt. 2. taglist!!! masterlist!!!!

☆ REALLY likes beef jerky. she’ll just sit there and chew…

- her hands r just constantly freezing. like DEAD PERSON COLD ITS SCARYYYY!!! she definitely uses ur boobs as handwarmers and its JARRING because her hands are actually so cold 😞😞!!!

- HER FEET TOO!!! she has some sort of circulation issues bc you’ll be in bed together and she’ll put her feet on you and you’ll just turn into a cartoon ice cube 😕😕

- the SECOND u have some sort of drama she is seated. like she is so MESSY she will talk shit abt someone she knows absolutely nothing abt just bc u don’t like them. anyone you hate she hates 💪🏽💪🏽

- speaking of she is literally so sassy 😞😞 like she will literally full body turn away from you and look at the window while you drive if she’s mad at you.

- every time you say something even remotely sexual she’s looking at you like 🤨 and trying not to laugh. if you texted her “im coming” she’d burst out laughing and write back like “geez we’re just going to the zoo…didn’t know u were THAT excited”

- has the humor of a middle school boy. she has an actual problem w deez nuts jokes 😞😞 she thinks its SOOOO FUNNY to give u fake backshots whenever you bend over around her. fake moans and everything 💔💔

- a pharb AND a barb. she definitely knows all of super bass by heart, and she knows how to play savior complex on the guitar. duality of women!!!

- every time you say something nice to her she’s like “ew thats gay” and then she gets upset when u get upset for it 😞 so RUDE actually!!!

- really likes doing facemasks with you because you always put them on for her, and because you look really stupid with them on.

- this video. js this whole video like!!! she definitely has that dinosaur hand sanitizer AND that backpack!!

- likes rings cuz she thinks they make her look cool, but she literally cannot keep them for more than a month. they get lost SO EASILY!!!

- knows a concerning amount of things about the roman empire.

- definitely saw the barbie movie with you, and got so embarrassed at the ken guitar scene ☹️ “do i do that??” and you had to hold back laughter and tell her no

- if you have little siblings, they LOVE HER. she is so good with kids its insane. she would definitely do the griddy w ur little brother and you would NEVER let her live it down

- if you take her to a family gathering, she’s either talking with your uncles or hanging out with your younger cousins. she’s scared of your cousins your age bc they’re “cool like you”

- definitely bought you lego flowers at one point and sat on the floor and built them with you

- has those glow-in-the-dark stars on her bedroom ceiling

- would absolutely lick your salt lamp “for science”

- one time you put her hair in pigtails and she wore it the whole day, and refused to let her friends make fun of it cuz her “wife” did them

- talks about you like a 40 year old man talks about his wife. “gotta get home to the wife” definitely has “happy wife happy life!” on a tshirt

- built the two of you a house on minecraft and put your beds next to each otherrrr :((

- carved your name on her skateboard and guitar

- had an AWFUL emo phase in middle school. terrible. was absolutely an avid tumblr user

- such a nerd about vinyls. would take u on dates to her favorite vinyl store, and buy you a new vinyl player because “yours damages your vinyls, and the audio quality is shit” (you randomly bought it on amazon)

- just knows so many facts…about things…. like she’s always talking to you like “oh my god babe did you know that-“

- would get “jealous” of your pets whenever you’d pet them or hold them in front of her. just going up to your cat like “she likes me more than you”

- made herself one of those “i love my girlfriend” tshirts with your face on it

- your dad definitely loves her because they have so much in common. grilling, fishing,camping, she’s like the ultimate dad-dyke

- can fall asleep ANYWHERE. like the second she’s tired she’s just 😴😴 and she’s definitely using you as a pillow

- one time the two of you went to a family party and you found her asleep on two folded chairs

- you’re her wallpaper on all her devices.

- every time you ask her what she’s doing and she’s playing guitar shes like “just fingering my guitar”. she thinks its SOOOO HILARIOUS

- definitely says white ppl shit all the time on accident . one time she said “lets rock and roll” when you two were going somewhere and she literally didn’t talk for 5 minutes cuz you could not stop laughing

- LOVES burts bees !!! her lips always taste like their strawberry chapstick and its wonderful

- has a pair of lightning mcqueen crocs

- LOVESSSS when you paint her nails and do her makeup (she just likes you sitting on her lap)

- definitely one of those girls thats like. obsessed w doctor pepper. its a serious problem 😞😞!!!

- has a little shoe box full of receipts, polaroids of you, and little souvenirs from your dates. :((

- literally melts when you scratch her back

- very into horror games/analog horror. definitely binge watched markipliers “faith” gameplay and talked about it nonstop

- miles morales is def her fave superhero. has so many of his comics and LOVES the spiderverse movies. calls you her gwen 😞😞

taglist!!! if ur name is crossed i cant tag u :((

@syrenada @dinaissoprettyoml @kingofmylastkiss @as2rid @greencacty @melissabarrerass @bratydoll @lov3lylotus @forelliesposts @echostinn @f3r4lfr0gg3r @r3wbeef @leatheredhearts @mousymaven @mina-281 @princessguardian444 @calystas-morning-tea @horror-whoree @slutshies @bearieio @mag-mfm @bubs-world @paran0id0blivi0n @sawaagyapong @bbygrlshelbs @gayh0rr0r @pl9ys @ellieslilslvvt @dollietes @elliesmellsbadd @ibloom4u @ddreabea @beestar120 @brunettedolls-blog @girlwonderchloe @elliesgflol @maris-koffin @emonopolyman @iloveeyousblog @fr3sh-tragedies @ilovaffles @certifedcrybunny @elleatethat @baldph0bic @clouded-whispers @4rt3m1ss @saggykneecaps @swtsuna @ell1esslutt @minixmel @yuyans-stuff @owmoiralover @thecowardwrites @lunascerebro @elliestrwbrry @iwantsoda @teeveegirl @dinasmoon @urnewghostfriend

[sturn3]

✮⋆˙ reflections- the neighborhood ౨ৎ⋆˚｡⋆

bbf!chris, who has been best friends with your older brother for aaaaages.

bbf!chris, who never seen you as more than his best friend's annoying little sister.

bbf!chris, who loved scaring boys away from with your brother.

bbf!chris, who would come in your room, mess your hair up, flex in your mirror and go bother your brother.

bbf!chris, who would randomly grab big portions of your food and stuff them in his mouth.

bbf!chris, who would have burping competitions with your brother. seriously, ew!

bbf!chris, who broke your heart when he announced he was going to prom with summer jones. did she even know his favorite color? his favorite mac miller song?

bbf!chris, who started noticing you more and more when he'd come back home for holidays with your brother from college. he couldn't help but notice how much longer your hair had gotten, your new belly piercing, more revealing clothing, and you genuinely were glowing.

bbf!chris, who followed you out of your brother's room when you caught them smoking weed, a habit they had recently picked up in college. in fear that you'd snitch on them, he ran after you. that moment he panicked so much, you looking up at him expectantly, he didn't even think it through what he'd do when he got this far, so he did the unexpectable. he kissed you.

bbf!chris, who was dying over how much you avoided him after that kiss, your brother was starting to notice it too. asking him a couple of times what was going on, chris not giving him any information or anything. your brother though, couldn't help but threaten him to not make a move on you. too late. the forbidden fruit was sweeter.

bbf!chris, who was trying to read your mind as you sat across from him at the table. picking at your food with your fork. you raised your head up, not expecting him to be directly looking at you with his big blue eyes. freak.

bbf!chris, who was currently stuck with you in a 7 minutes of heaven. awkward silence filling the room, the tension could be cut with a knife. "so, why did you do it?" you caught chris off guard. "why did i do what? kiss you?" he said confused, "yeah, why did you do it? you know my brother would freak out and you know about my stupid middle school crush on you so tell me why did you do it." you said in one breath. chris was looking at you like he had seen a ghost, he didn't know the reason you were avoiding him was because you were scared of what you were feeling. "you had a crush on me??" he said squinting his eyes and trying to suppress a smile. "yeah, yeah. don't act like you don't know. everyone did. my parents, your parents, your brothers and even mine," you admitted "well, do you still have a crush on me? cause i could work with that." you both smiled like idiots at each other and immediately kissing.

rip bbf!chris, who was caught by your brother kissing you😕😕 no, no, he didn't die, he was just made to do a thousand push ups, mow the lawn, clean your pool and beg for forgiveness.

[chaosisalwayscrying]

i NEEEEEED a chris or matt x british reader cos there just never is any and i just want. i’ve asked before but they lowkey just kept on saying “it’s chewsday innit” over and over again 😭

LONDON GIRL

⇥ synopsis : matt goes to with his girlfriend to the place she grew up, london

⇥ warnings : none :)!

⇥ extra : ummm i hate this 😝 its been pushed back sm cause of school AND i rewrote it sm cause i hated it. i hope this is good enough 😕 ty for the request anon!!

⇥ masterlist !

⇥ taglist !

    you and matt had met at an influencer party, after you had just moved in with friends in LA from london. they were big in the influencer scene and decided to drag you out. of course, they ditched you in favor of drinking and flirting with whoever possible, but you weren't interested in even speaking until matt ran into you.

when you turned, it was like love at first sight. he frantically apologized for almost knocking you over, and when you spoke and he heard your accent, he fell harder. your thick accent was so attractive to him, and he was asking for your number before his brain could even process it.

you gave it to him, figuring that nows the time to make new friends.

    and now, a year later, you're in a happy 8-month long relationship. matt was nothing short of amazing, he pampered you and make you feel special every day.

    so, when you decided to go back to london for week to visit, you drag matt, chris, and nick with you too.

    "are you sure its ok we come back to london with you pretty? dont you want to visit family and go around alone?" matt asks, watching you from his place on the bed.

    "i wanna show you all my favorite places matt, and we can explore and shop with your brothers!" you return, a wide grin on your face as you turn to look at him. you were in the middle of packing you and matts clothes in a suitcase.

matts heart swells as you smile at him, before asking for the tenth time if you wanted him to help.

"no it’s ok, i like to pack stuff. plus i wanna organize it. we already set out our outfits so i just have to pack them" you say, turning back to the suitcase and placing a shirt on your side.

"oh! actually, can you go pack the toiletries? i wrote out a list of all the stuff, it should be on the vanity with the bag" you ask, not turning as you hear him get up and shuffle around.

"of course, ill be back" he said, coming up behind you and kissing the junction between your neck and shoulder.

“thank youuu!” you say in a sing-song voice as he walks out, blush burning on your cheeks from his actions.

by the time you had packed you and matts things, it felt as if your whole wardrobe was packed up all over again. when you had gone upstairs to check on chris and nick, nick was sat on top of the suitcase as chris tried to zip it, making you laugh for a good few minutes.

once you stopped laughing at their expense, they practically begged you to help them reorganize and pack, to which you obliged with a smile.

—————

landing in london was like sweet relief, the plane was uncomfortable and there was a lot of turbulence, and you had gotten so dizzy and nauseous at a point you had to lock yourself in the plane bathroom.

the plane rides were brutal, from la to boston, then to london in the same trip was sure to take a toll on anyone, but the triplets had never flown that long before and it was definitely taking its toll. chris could barely order the uber for all of you, and matt almost missed your shared luggage and grabbed someone elses.

    the next few days were chaotic, magical, and felt completely unreal. you and the boys started off your week by exploring some little shops close to the hotel, not wanting to go too far because of the jetlag still wearing off.

    the day after that, you dragged the boys around to all the tourist locations possible. nick and chris were so eager to get cool pictures and film for their channel, that you and matt were able to have nice quiet moments and cute pictures (courtesy of nick and chris).

    when you were near big ben, chris and nick had gone off to an obvious tourist shop to get stupid shirts and whatever else they could find, leaving you and matt on a bridge nearby as the sun began setting.

    "y'know," matt began, turning from the sunset to look in your eyes. "i’m really happy you invited us on this trip. seeing the place you grew up from your perspective and exploring your favorite spots feels so special. i love you" he smiled, leaning in for a kiss right after.

    the kiss was soft and sweet, matt holding your hips as your hands rest on his cheeks. as you part, you hear obnoxious cheers from certain boys a few feet away. you blush furiously as matt turned around with a playful scowl on his lips.

“you guys suck!” he calls, a chuckle breaking his angry facade. he turns back to you and playfully rolls his eyes, though in his head he was hoping his brothers got photos of them in front of the sunset.

“im glad you’re having fun, matty. i was scared you’d hate london” you smile, finally responding to his previous comment. matts expression morphed into disbelief, which made you laugh.

“hate london? i love it here! minus most of the food, but other than that i love it here baby, im so happy you invited us.” he smiled, leaning in to press another kiss to your lips.

you smiled too, happy that he and his brothers were having so much fun in london, a place so beautiful and near to your heart.

ove the next few days, you and the boys explored the city some more, finding cute boutiques and cringey tourist shops alike. all the shopping you did made it hard to repack your bags and fit everything, and you had to get nick and chris to sit on your suitcases to get them shut.

you would say the trip was a success, you got to revisit all your favorite places and make them even more special as you made new memories there.

⇥ TAGS !

@sturnioloshacker @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @hertvgirl @cupidzsq @sturnnie @leah-loves-lilies @billkaulitz0630

[deadghosy]

If I was in Hazbin hotel:

Author insert x Hazbin Hotel

Prompt: an author is bored as they decided to jump into their favorite fandom at this very moment.

Honestly I’m bored asf rn lmao.

Will, the blogger in tumblr known as Deadghosy was bored in his room as he listens to jay aka kub scoutz 😍 playing lil guardsman. Being even more bored they opened their palm as a digital portal opens-

OKAY STOP…at first I was gonna do that story ass shit but let me be real. I died by not getting enough sleep and I popped into hell for not liking those Jesus posts😭

I’d honestly be in the sloth ring for being lazy asf and being tired most of the time. But also be in the gluttony ring as well. A BIG BITCH GOTTA EATTTT😭

But I would probably still be able to go into the pride ring because of my pride in not needing help from people. 😭 I hate asking for damn help irl.

I actually have very sharp canine teeth and bottom rows, I might as well be mistaken for a humanoid demon lol/j

But if did have a demon form, it’s a bear since I eat and sleep all day lmao.

Alastor wouldn’t “hate hate” me but find me annoying. I would try to get on his good side and never do deals with him obviously cause I like my soul 😍. But dead ass I’m showing him lingo of gen z ☝🏾💀 cause ain’t no way ima hear this deer man yap in a way I can’t understand. This is not no new broadcast from the old times dude. “Salutations!-” HAVIN ASS😕

Friendship level: 5/10

Sir Pentious, I’m teaching this bitch how to do the whip and nae nae 😄. I love him personally cause he so silly sometimes. I would just pop up as he works on weapons but not help him lol. I think personally our friendship would be the kind to talk to each other for a little and stop and repeat😕

Friendship level: 4.5/10

Charlie would like me because of my hyperactive personality sometimes. Like if I’m fixating on something, she would listen and probably tell her father. But mostly i wouldn’t do the trust exercises, she’ll have to drag my black ass to do them 💀

Friendship level: 6/10

Lucifer and I would be so chill dead ass. He’s probably adopt me if I’m gonna be honest cause I also have a duck toy in my room as we speak 😭LITERALLY I MIGHT AS WELL BE A MINI HIM WITH HIM HAVING HYPER FIXATIONS.

Friendship level: 10/10

Vaggie and me, idk she’s chill but short tempered. But I don’t think she would hate me but only he suspicious at first, but then just be chill with me. I would try to help her around but procrastinate lmao

Friendship level: 5.5//10

Husk would probably be chill but not have an opinion on me honestly. It will depend on me just going to talk to him or being nervous to talk to him. I hate being awkward so I would just wave or sit by his bar and chill with him as I draw.

Friendship level: it’s probably between 3/10 and 5/10

Angel and me, idk I feel like I would be a small friend of his to help. He wouldn’t trauma dump that much on me cause I’m just a kid so it would be like “oh my work is shit but my boss is even more shit.” So I would just nod acting like I don’t know what’s going on. Plus, I would probably try to make him something with the help of Lucifer

Friendship level: ima be honest…it’s probably a 4/10 cause I’m a minor and he has problems he need it overcome. He doesn’t need a minor to yap his ear off 😕

The Vee’s…😕ain’t no way ima talk to them front to front if I’m actually gonna be their friends dead ass. I would probably mostly be friends with Velvette to hook me up on outfits😍

Friendship level: -1000/10

Valentino…HAH YOU WOULD HAVE TO CATCH MY BLACK ASS ACTUALLY DEAD IF IM GONNA CHILL WITH THIS BASTARD 😂 I’m burning his whole studio down in a cool ass pyro tf2 mask. Fuck that bitch, all my homies hate Valentino 🤭

ENEMY LEVEL: 10000000/10🖕🏾

Vox, I’m begging him to try to advance my phone so I can prank call heaven and hell at the same time. I’m using so much evil ass shit🦆 like dead ass ima say “I heard your high school bully is in heaven” to an angel so they would go crazy trying to find their bully lmao. But Vox would hate my ass cause..I’m me? Idk lol

Enemy level: 8.5/10

Velvette, eh I feel like we would be mutuals but not too friendly. More like a hook up just so i can get free outfits and she can get a quick teen model and I can leave with the fit fr 😍 no money, free outfit‼️

Friendship level: 4.5/10

Adam and me..we throwin hands. Full on fist to fist. He probably would try to cheat but nahhh, you gettin kicked in the manhood bitch 😄‼️ but yeah me and him, enemies for life. He’s funny I’ll admit, but be honest having him beside you irl💀

Enemy level: he better keep one eye open.

Sera…yeah she not letting me in heaven lmao 😭 that’s all ima say LMAOO

Friendship level: -0/10

Lute will 100% percent kill me for my mouth 😭. I’d probably say GYATT to her for funnies only to get stab. But I would just be quiet and try to be on her good side lmao

Friendship level: 2/10

Emily would like me but would be the type of person to keep me in check with my mouth and vulgar language as I just chill eating all the food in heaven. She def givin me good tours.

Friendship level: a good 7.5/10

That’s all I have lmao

[hwaslayer]

project: make you love me (jyh) | four.

♣︎ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: yunho can’t stand how you’re so wrapped up in the notorious campus fuckboy, park seonghwa. he would gladly love you the way you deserve, despite being shy, awkward and the complete opposite of seonghwa. thus, when he finds himself spending more time with you over literature reviews and random study sessions, he decides to take on the challenge to win you over.

—pairing: jeong yunho x f. reader x park seonghwa

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers/friends to lovers, college au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 5.6k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing/mature language, chaery being bold per usual lol (but shes a cutie and we love her), oc and yunho get to know each other more, mentions of sickness/being ill (not oc or yunho), yunho's mom is a single mom, hwa gets a little 😕 but oc knows how to put her foot down, say hello to mingi!!, mingi brings something up and it kinda rubs yunho the wrong way but boy has patience

"We're getting lunch with Jongho and them. Coming?" You shake your head as you walk alongside Soobin, with Seungmin and Chaery trailing behind.

"Nope, no can do." You say. "I'm taking Yunho to lunch to repay him for the ni—" Seungmin looks at you and you pause. Right. Soobin and Chaery don't know Seonghwa left you stranded. "Foooor his help with my reviews." You backtrack a bit, hoping the two didn't catch on.

"Oh, that's sweet of you." Chaery says. "You definitely should! We won't be home 'till later either, soo.. " She giggles and you shake your head at her forwardness.

"So.. what, Chaery?" You glare at her.

"Yeah, what is wrong with you?" Seungmin laughs a bit. "You'll scare him away."

"I will not! I'm just saying, the option is there." She puckers her lips and wiggles her brows.

"Anyway, I'm just going to grab lunch with him at the cute, new brunch place downtown. Let me know if you want anything?" You stop in your tracks, realizing you've walked farther than you should've. Yunho mentioned he was going to be at the Engineering Center, which is in the opposite direction.

"Sounds good." Soobin gives you a small, pursed smile; dimples dotting his cheeks as he sends an animated wave. "See you? Have fun, be safe!"

"Thanks." You wave to your friends as you watch them walk off without. You turn on your heel to walk back towards the building that Yunho just ended class in, picking up your pace when you realize you're running a little late compared to the time you promised to meet him. As you close in on the building, you catch sight of the tall boy and his fluffy black hair.

"Yunho!" Yunho whips his head around to see you walking towards him. He smiles a bit and stops, waiting for you to catch up. "Hey! I was just about to text you. You still free to grab brunch with me, right?"

"Yeah, I was waiting." He teases, making you chuckle.

"I know, I'm too slow. Sorry." You joke back. "Let's go." You look up at him and he nods.

"How was class?"

"Mm, same old. What about you?"

"It was okay. Another small project I gotta work on."

"Sounds fun." You gently nudge him with your elbow. "Computer Science right?" He nods.

"Public Health?"

"Wow, a point for Jeong Yunho." He laughs.

"Y/N, it's not an entirely huge school. You know a lot of people, and people know you."

"For the wrong reasons, most likely."

"No. Just for being you." He says with a soft smile on his face.

"Are you always this smooth talking to girls?" He laughs and shakes his head.

"Quite the opposite actually. It's just.. easy to talk to you, I guess." He looks down at his feet timidly.

"I'm glad." You chuckle. "So, I'm thinking of taking you to Cafe 24. Does that sound okay?"

"The new brunch place?" He smiles, and it adds a rosy tint to his cheeks. "Cool. I've heard good things about it already."

"Yeah?" You ask in an animated, questioning tone. "Nice. I'm excited."

"Your friends didn't wanna come?" You finally get to your car and toss your bag in the trunk, signaling for Yunho to put his things down as well.

"Hell no. Or else, they'll order everything expecting me to pay." You sigh. "So, nope! This is just for you, especially as my small token of appreciation." Yunho doesn't say anything besides let out a small laugh before hopping into your car and settling in. "By the way, I drive as safely as possible, so please don't make fun of me."

"I won't." Yunho watches as you adjust your seat closer to the wheel. Once you feel content, you start the car and double check your mirrors before pulling out of the spot and driving off.

Luckily, the drive isn't far or else Yunho wasn't sure what he'd do. It's not that he was uncomfortable around you, but he's not used to keeping the small talk alive— let alone engaging and being the first to break the silence.

You seem to understand him well though, because besides the few questions you ask him about the week, you don't push the conversation. 

And it's nice.

He listens to the music you have on, hearing you softly hum in the driver's seat as you carefully navigate the narrow downtown roads and find a spot near the café.

"Sweeeet." He hears you giggle as you pull into a parking spot that just opened up. "We're here!"

"There's not too many people?" Yunho says in a questioning tone as he unbuckles his seatbelt and peeks at the front door. It's busy, but not enough for a wait. You check your phone and take note of the fact that it's still earlier than noon— you and Yunho barely missing the lunch rush. 

"Still early, I guess." You greet one of the staff members and she immediately brings you and Yunho to a table in the back corner. She lays out the menu in front of you, giving you a moment to glaze over the options while she heads to the back to grab water. "Everything looks so good." Yunho chuckles.

"Anything you've been craving for?"

"Something sweet?" Your eyes widen at the sight of 'matcha mochi waffles' on the menu, pondering whether or not you should give in to your sweet tooth or get something a little more filling on the savory side. "But now, I'm torn. I kinda wanna taste the omurice." 

"You can have some of mine?" Yunho was eyeing the omurice anyway, and he doesn't mind sharing some with you.

"Really?" Your eyes sparkle and it makes Yunho's ears turn red. He's feeling shy now because yes, really. Yes, you're cute.

"Yeah, I don't mind." You smile.

"Hm, okay. You can have some of my mochi waffle and bacon?" He shakes his head.

"It's alright, Y/N. It's not a big deal."

"Yes, it is. It's a new brunch place and who knows when we'll be back. You should taste it." He doesn't respond, just simply smiles back at your argument. At this point, the waitress is back with two waters and asks if you two would like anything to drink. Yunho declines, but you happily order a vanilla latte. She asks if you're ready to order, eyes darting to Yunho for some kind of acknowledgement— which he gives to you in the form of a simple nod. She takes down your orders and lets you know that she'll be back with your latte, taking your menus before she's off to the kitchen. "So." Yunho looks at you after he's been people-watching through the window.

"Hm?" He hums.

"Tell me about yourself, Yunho." You say softly. Typically, Yunho hates these kinda things. He'll usually respond very vaguely to cut it off at a certain point. He just doesn't think people need to know much about him, nor does he really find himself interesting. But for now, he'll dive in a little more. He doesn't seem to find the harm in it when it comes to you.

"I don't even know where to start?" He laughs a bit. "I'm not sure what you want to know."

"Anything." The waitress brings your latte and you immediately start blowing at it to cool it down. "Tell me anything."

"I'm an only child?" He starts off with an unsure tone, but you nod in response to reassure him. "Home is two hours away at my aunt's house."

"Sweet. If you don't mind me asking.. have you always lived with your aunt?" 

"Yeah, I have. She's my mom's sister, and my mom is sick." Your eyes soften. "She has kidney issues so she's on dialysis. She's still strong and all, but it's nice that my aunt is there. She helps take care of her and bring her to appointments, especially while I'm away most of the time." You nod quietly.

"What about your dad?" He shrugs.

"Uh, he left when I was young, so I don't really know much about him."

"Shoot. I'm so sorry, Yunho. I didn't mean to—"

"Nah, it's okay. I don't mind talking about it, but I also can't give better responses since I don't know much myself." 

"You must be very close to your mom." Yunho thinks about his mom for a second, taking mental note that he needs to call her later. She has always been so strong, and she's always been Yunho's driving force. Even though he didn't have his dad around, he never felt like he lacked love or support because he mom did a fantastic job covering all of those bases no matter what. 

She never let Yunho down. And he only hopes he can do the same in return.

"I am."

"I can only imagine how tough it is."

"Yeah." He lets out a breath. "But, she's doing well. She's been well for a long time. All I can ask for." You give him a tiny toothless smile.

"I'm glad to hear that."

"W-what about you?" He clears is throat to try and brush off the slight nervousness he feels asking these questions. Surely, you asked about him. But, you wouldn't mind sharing your own facts, right?

"I have an older sister who works in finance. She's 4 years older than me. My parents split up, but my dad still comes around to hang out. They're better this way, I think. Their relationship is much healthier." You also start thinking about your parents, reminiscing about the tough times when they used to fight for days on end. Luckily, you and your sister were close— you could lean onto her like you do with your bestfriends. She tried to protect you and keep you safe as much as possible, tried to shield you from the negativity even though it was hard to. Eventually, your parents had enough and split; though, you'd like to think this was their silver lining since they're much better around each other now.

"I see." Yunho sips his water. "It's nice he's still around."

"Mhm." You tilt your head. "Do you have a lot of friends back home?"

"I wouldn't say lots. A few people that I grew up with still live around my area, but most people have moved."

"That's cool to still see some childhood friends, though." It's your turn to sip. "How do you know Mingi so well?"

"We went to the same high school. We have some common interests, but that's it? We just hang out with different crowds." Yunho shrugs. "Mingi finds certain people and certain things fun that I don't necessarily find fun. He's a big social butterfly."

"Yeah, I see that." You chuckle.

"You and your friends seem really close. Did you meet here?"

"We did." You smile. "Chaery and I were roommates and Soobin and Seungmin lived across the hall from us."

"Did you meet Chaery before you two moved in?"

"Nope. Just that day." You laugh. "Believe it or not. We clicked really well and got close easily. I got lucky with her." At this point, the waitress comes with your plate and tells Yunho she'll be back with his as they're just finishing up in the kitchen. "Then we met Soobin and Seungmin. And they slowly started coming into our room more often. Turned into going to the cafeteria together, to hanging out and studying in our room together."

"That's good. It's always nice to have solid, good friends around."

"Yeah." You look at him. He notices that you aren't eating your food, and he feels bad that you are waiting for him. So, he clears his throat again and mutters out a quick—

"Oh, you don't have to wait for me." He looks at you, then down at your food.

"No, it's okay Yunho. I'll wait." You nod. "Speaking of roommates, are you close to Yeosang?"

"Uh, we're cool, I guess?" He shyly laughs. "We randomly got paired up because we're in the same major." The waitress sets his plate down and he pauses for a brief moment to thank her and asks for an extra plate. When she leaves, he returns his attention back to you. "Anyway. One day, he asked if I knew anyone who needed a roommate. At the time, I was renting a room in this couple's home. I didn't mind it, and they were super friendly. But, I figured having more space would be nice instead of being confined to a room and feeling shy about going into the shared kitchen and bathroom." You laugh.

"I get that, totally understandable." Yunho is splitting some of his omurice [a bit more than you expected] and placing it neatly on the extra plate before scooting it your way. "Wait. Yunho, that's a lot." You look at him worriedly and he shakes his head, continuing to edge the plate towards you.

"No, it's not." You look at him and he gives you a small smile. "Promise."

"Thank you." You say, cutting him a good chunk of your waffle and placing it on the edge of his plate. "I know you said you and Yeosang are cool so.. do you hang out often at home?"

"We'll talk and have dinner sometimes, but most of the time, we're in our rooms playing games." You giggle and Yunho's ears turn red. "Wow, I probably sounded ridiculous saying that."

"No, no. Soobin and Seungmin have a tendency to do that too. As long as it makes you happy and content, right?"

"Mmyeah."

"How often do you go home?"

"Hm, I try to go every other weekend? But, sometimes plans don't work out that way. I just try to go as soon as I can."

"I see." You continue to hold a conversation in between bites, with topics ranging from school, your majors, things your friends have gotten into.

Dancing.

Yunho observes you as you talk about your dance team and how much you enjoy it, and he loves the way your eyes twinkle; the way you animatedly move your hands while describing the team and its accomplishments, the way you giggle in between. He can tell you really enjoy it, and he's truly happy you have something to fall onto when times get rough, something to help celebrate when you're having good days.

He just can't understand how Seonghwa fits in this mix. He doesn't, he shouldn't. You are too good for him, and you have way more to offer.

"So.. yeah, that's us. We're small, but we're fun. And I think people on campus enjoy our pieces." Yunho laughs a bit before finishing up his food. He feels bad since he's never really gone out of his way to watch any of your performances, but maybe he should.

"Let me know when your next one is?"

"You'll come?" You ask with so much hope in your eyes. Yeah, maybe he should this time.

"Yeah, if I don't have anything planned."

"Oh, so we're the backup plan." You tease and Yunho shakes his head.

"No, not like that. You know what I mean. If I'm around and not at home."

"Of course." You tilt your head and smile at him. "I'll text you details later." You set aside your plate and sit back in your seat, feeling stuffed but content with your meal. You call for the waitress to bring over the check, instantly handing off your card in fear of Yunho trying to swoop in. "Oof, I'm full. But, that was so good. I really liked it."

"It was." Yunho sets his own plate aside and sips on some water. "Thanks again, you really didn't have to."

"I did. Small token of appreciation for the help you've been giving me. I've always struggled with these things so having someone patiently explain and walk me through improvements means a lot." You say before getting up and grabbing your things. "Ready?" Yunho nods before following you out. "Are you going to work in the library until class?"

"Probably."

"Do you mind if I join you?" Yunho looks down at you with a small smile.

"Not at all."

You make the trek back to school comfortably, parking in the lot near the library so that you and Yunho won't have to do too heavy of a walk. The both of you are engaging in more small talk, with Yunho feeling a bit more comfortable to joke around with you. He doesn't dare bring up Seonghwa because he knows it isn't his business, but also because he'd hate to see your mood shift.

You look good happy.

Getting back to the library, you scoot yourself into the opposite side of the booth and face Yunho. He immediately pulls out his laptop to do some work, not really saying much as his focus is redirected on trying to understand the new project they were just assigned. He glances over the edge of his laptop from time to time though, and you don't really catch it because you're too immersed in the note-taking you're doing. You write so precisely, so neatly; switching from one colored pen to the next before highlighting in a super straight line. His eyes glance up to your face, your features, before shifting his attention back down to his assignments.

Cutie.

"What's up, Yunho?" Yunho is pulled out of his thoughts when he hears that familiar deep voice. Seonghwa smirks at him before his eyes land on you. You don't look too happy to see him right now, but Yunho knows Seonghwa still has the upper hand here, and honestly, it sucks. "Hey Y/N, can I talk to you?"

"Why?"

"Cause, it's important." He licks his lips when his smile fades. "Please?" Your eyes dart from Yunho, back to Seonghwa. Yunho just quietly glances at you though, trying his best to mind his own business and let you decide on your own. But he's begging, pleading, in his mind that you don't leave with Seonghwa. Not after he left you in the cold the way he did.

Too bad it was a wishful thought.

"Fine." You huff before packing up your things and start to slide out of the booth. "Talk to you later? Thanks for today." You give Yunho a soft, apologetic smile, and he can only nod in acknowledgment before you're walking off next to that asshole. He continues to watch as you two walk down and into a random aisle of books. You can't help but scoff at Seonghwa again when you realize he's hiding because of course he doesn't want too many people in his business and to see you two so close. Of course he needs to do this in the fucking history aisle of the library. "This is your idea of talking?" All he does is chuckle a bit before he's tucking a piece of your hair behind the ear.

"Baby, seriously? Why are you hanging around Yunho so much?"

"Because we're friends?" He snorts.

"Since when? I don't ever recall Yunho being in your little circle."

"Oh my god, Seonghwa. He's been helping me with some assignments. What is this really about?" He shrugs.

"Nothing, I already told you. I'm not trying to share, not with him." You furrow your brows.

"Share?" You scoff. Clearly, you were just a possession to him. "We aren't dating. You made that very loud and clear from the beginning."

"Still. The dude can't even pull his own girl—"

"Stop." You put your hand out and shake your head. "If you're just gonna talk shit, let me get back to doing homework with Yunho. I don't have time for it." He sighs heavily and tries to pull you into him by the elbows.

"Okay, I'm sorry. I just got worried because you didn't answer my text last night."

"Worried over me, or because you weren't getting any?"

"Come on, Y/N. Cut that shit out."

"No, you cut that shit out. It was freezing last night. I fucking waited for you at the spot for an hour."

"And I said I was sorry. I wanted to make it up to you last night but you didn't respond. I feel really bad about it, but what am I supposed to do when you won't even talk to me?"

"Seriously?" You let out a sigh. "Whatever you say." He sucks his teeth and lifts your chin with his finger.

"Baby, I'm trying here. If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't be doing this." You simply stare at him. You know he's lying, and you know he genuinely doesn't care about you. There is not one honest bone in his body that actually gives a damn about you. He's telling you what you wanna hear because he knows it'll work every—single—time. 

"I don't know—"

"I'll wait for you until you're done with practice tonight, how about that? You can just shower at my place so we can hang out all night."

"That's the issue, you're never there after practice."

"I will be. I promise." He pouts a bit. "I'll be there waiting for you." He laces your hand with his and kisses the surface. "Walk with me to class?" You look at him, but all you can think about is leaving Yunho. You let out a sigh knowing all you want to do is avoid conflict, shrugging at his question.

"Fine."

"That's my girl." He leads the way out of the aisle, giving Yunho the pettiest nod you've ever seen. You try to avoid eye contact since you felt bad for leaving.

But, fuck. You just needed to get through the day in one peace. 

He swings an arm around you for a second before he sees his friends on the way to class. He gives you a quick peck on the cheek just as he reaches his classroom, leaving you to finish up work at the nearby student center.

The day goes on [peacefully], and you're off to dance practice with your friends. You forget about everything for a moment while you're with them, enjoying the time that you get to spend all together even if it's through dance. They invite you to hang out with the group afterwards, but you politely decline especially when you actually see Seonghwa waiting outside in his car. You give your friends big hugs before waving goodbye, and settle yourself into Seonghwa's car.

He talks about his day for a bit, even as you walk into his apartment and see San eating his dinner. He doesn't really ask about yours, nor does he care enough to. He does ask if you've eaten and if you want some food, but you shake your head and tell him you'll be off to shower and finish your homework in his room. Throughout your shower, you can hear him and San laughing loudly in the dining area before they're going at each other's necks while playing FIFA.

You feel like you're just.. there.

You silently sit against the wall as you type away on your laptop, sighing as Seonghwa and San continue to yell over their last game. You find that you aren't really in the mood to be here, but you hang on to see what Seonghwa's version of 'making it up to you' means.

Should've known it wasn't shit.

Especially when he barges into his room and shuts the door, immediately kissing you before trailing a few soft kisses down your neck. He thinks you're enjoying it, so he keeps peppering your neck even as you gently try to pry him off.

"Hwa." You call his name and he ignores it, fingers slightly fiddling with the waistband of his sweats that you're wearing. "Seonghwa, stop." You say, pushing him back. "Stop." You repeat with a harder push when he almost dips his hand into your sweats.

"W-what? What's wrong?" He furrows his brows when he backs up to read your expression, your body language. Suddenly, you feel out of place, feeling like you wanna go home and be in your own peace.

You did not wanna be here. Not with him.

"I'm just.. not in the mood. Can you take me home?"

"Not in the mood?" He repeats. "What, should I have gone slower? Did I do something—"

"Seonghwa, please just take me home. I'm not asking twice." You say and he lets out a scoff as he hops off the bed and grabs his keys. 

"Alright, whatever." He says, digging his hands into his pockets while walking out of his room. You change into the extra clothes you brought in your duffle bag, setting his clothes neatly into his laundry hamper. You quietly trail behind him as you tug on your bag and watch your feet drag you to his car. You hop in and Seonghwa doesn't say a word, instantly starting up the car and driving off. You can tell he's upset by the way his jaw is clenched, the way his hand tightly wraps around the wheel.

The way he drives.

A rather quick drive becomes even quicker, and you're glad you don't live far from his apartment. This entire ride feels suffocating and you can't wait to leave entirely. He pulls into your lot and brakes near the curb, giving you time to step out of his car. He doesn't give you another look, nor does he say anything— you simply slam the door shut and he races off, leaving before paying you any mind.

Perfect.

This wasn't anything new, but tonight feels awful. You start to feel guilty for whatever happened, though you shouldn't.

You shouldn't feel guilty.

You let out a shaky sigh as you step into your apartment, your roommates not being home since they're out with the dance group. You set your things aside and quickly take a shower before plopping onto your bed and doing.. nothing.

You want to do nothing.

You scroll through your phone as you try your hardest not to let any tears fall. They shouldn't, you did nothing wrong. But everything feels wrong, suffocating.

You hate feeling this way.

Yunho is getting ready to wrap up his work for the day when he sees a body slide into the booth he's currently occupying.

"Sup dude." Mingi says.

"Yo." Yunho responds. "What are you still doing here?" He asks, unfamiliar with Mingi's presence during these evening hours in the library.

"I had to work on a group project." Yunho continues to draft out some notes for his project while Mingi sits back and lets out a breath. "Another project?"

"Yup. How'd your group project go?"

"Eh. It's alright, but we're done. Just need to present." Mingi scrolls through his phone. "I saw you with Y/N earlier." Yunho pauses to briefly look at him before returning his attention back to his notebook. "I didn't know you two knew each other." He chuckles.

"We have literature class together, and I was helping her with some reviews."

"You seem close, though? Have you always been close?" Yunho shrugs at two things— one, he definitely can't say you two are close, and two, how nosy Mingi is being. It must be for Seonghwa.

"Not really. She's cool, though."

"Hm." Mingi hums before putting his phone down on the table. "Yeah, she is. I don't know what Hwa's deal is sometimes."

"Mm, but you would never mention it to him." Yunho teases with a small chuckle, but he means it. He absolutely means it.

"I just feel like it isn't my place to. Me and San have both told him to chill, but can't force someone to act a certain way if they don't want to." Yunho shrugs.

Fine, he thinks. But, Mingi could at least tell the guy when he's wrong and what he's done wrong, right? He would at least hope that's part of their conversations, and he knows Mingi is aware of right vs. wrong. 

No better way than letting someone know the truth. 

Seonghwa is wrong damn near more than half of the time.

"Yeah, I guess." Is all Yunho responds with.

"He does like her, though." Yunho looks at him with tightly-knit brows. What does he mean Seonghwa likes you? That's his way of showing his feelings for you? And it must be obvious that Yunho is feeling a certain way about that statement because Mingi instantly backs it up with a— "I mean like, I know he has some kind of feelings for her. He does more for her than I've seen him do for anyone else. I just don't know why he's stringing her along and not being more serious." 

"Like.. what? Leave her in the cold until he's ready to pick her up? Really shows his feelings." Yunho sarcastically responds. "Anyway, sure. It's not really my business."

"Are you sure?"

"What?"

"You seem interested in her."

"Because we hung out?" Yunho shrugs. "Okay, Mingi."

"I only bring it up because he's mentioned it. Hwa can get pretty protective and jealous. I don't want him to start shit with you—"

"He doesn't need to." Yunho responds. "Not really on me anyway, I'm not the one in the wrong."

"Right, I guess."

"I know he's your friend, but she deserves way better. You can tell me all of this, and it still won't change my mind." Yunho chimes in one last time, completely over the conversation. "If she isn't happy, he shouldn't be selfish enough to continue trapping her." He finishes up his notes before closing his notebook and packing up.

"You're right." Is all Mingi replies with while watching Yunho pack up. Because what can he say? Of course, he agrees. But he has this weird obligation, this loyalty, to Seonghwa because of their friendship.

"I'm gonna head out." Yunho slides to the end of the booth before throwing his bag over his shoulder. "Gonna stay behind?"

"Nah, I'll come with. Wasn't planning on staying any longer." Yunho nods, allowing Mingi to walk alongside of him. He's a little annoyed, but in a weird and unconventional way, he knows Mingi didn't mean any harm. He knows he didn't mean to intentionally attack him. 

Still, though. His point about Park Seonghwa stands.

Yunho continues his walk to the car with Mingi, the topic of discussion now being new game releases and a party that's coming up soon at one of the athlete's homes. Mingi extends the invite to Yunho, but Yunho shakes his head and tells him he doesn't think he'd end up going. He might change his mind if he feels better about it when the time gets closer, but as of now— it feels like a hard no.

Once Yunho and Mingi finally part ways, Yunho climbs into his car and begins his silent drive home. He starts pondering about his day and how he actually really enjoyed it. He feels comfortable enough to be himself around you, and he can't say that for many people.

You are enticing to him.

When he gets home, everything feels still— quiet. The night sky is dotted with stars, while the crickets chirp.

"Mom." He says, parking his car off to the curb and grabbing his things.

"Yunho, baby." She says a bit lowly. "How are you? How was your day?"

"I'm alright, just hanging in there. Had lunch with a friend before working on a few projects." He begins to walk to his apartment. "How are you feeling?"

"Good! Your aunt and I went out for a walk, then shopped for a few things today." Yunho chuckles. 

"Cute. Weather's been nice. Glad you guys have been getting out."

"Yeah, enough about that though. A friend, hm?" She chuckles.

"Yeah." Yunho smiles. "We have the same class together. I've been helping her with some of the assignments."

"So, it's a her." Yunho can hear his aunt giggling in the background, making him roll his eyes.

"Uh huh—" Before he can start lecturing his mom and aunt about how you two are merely friends, classmates, another call comes through on the line. He stops in his tracks and quickly removes the phone from his ear to see who's calling. "Mom, can I call you back in a second? I just got home."

"Okay, get settled. I love you!" She says in a sing-song manner and Yunho laughs a bit.

"Love you too." He responds before ending that call and switching to the next. "Hey. Is everything okay?"

You chuckle on the other line before responding with a shaky: "Why wouldn't things be, Yunho?"

"I don't know. Just wasn't expecting your call, is all."

"I'm sorry, are you busy? I'm so dumb, I really shouldn't have—"

"It's okay, Y/N. Seriously. I just got home from the library." He steps inside his apartment finding that Yeosang is in his beloved cave, yelling at his computer screen per usual. He walks into his room and places his things down, settling onto his computer chair with a soft sigh.

"Okay." You haven't said much and it's obvious to Yunho that something is indeed wrong. You needed someone and you turned to Yunho for comfort.

God, he sucks at this. But, he wants to be there for you.

"What's going on?"

"Huh? Nothing. I just wanted to check on you." He chuckles.

"I don't get very far, Y/N. Don't worry." Silence. "What's bothering you?"

"How do you know something's bothering me?"

"I can practically hear you thinking from here." You giggle and it warms Yunho's heart. At least his effort is somewhat working.

"I.. was at Seonghwa's not too long ago. And I just didn't wanna be there. I asked him to take me home and he was upset. I don't know why I feel bad about it."

"Feel bad? What is there to feel bad about?"

"Maybe I should've asked him in a better way, I don't know. I felt suffocated and demanded rather than politely telling him."

"Y/N, you don't owe him anything. You don't need to explain anything to him. He doesn't need to be upset about you going home because that's your own choice. He's mad because he didn't get his way for once. Still not your problem." You let out a shaky sigh and a tear manages to slide down your cheek. This was so dumb, you shouldn't have called Yunho to vent about this.

"This must sound so dumb, I'm sorry Yunho—"

"It's not dumb. Don't be sorry." Silence, again. "I hope you know that if things don't get better, you were never in the wrong. You don't need him."

"I know." Yunho doesn't say much because he doesn't wanna attack you or make you feel worse. So, he sits there. Listening to you breathe.

Listening to you sigh, be upset.

"Yunho?"

"Mhm?"

"I'm sorry for leaving you behind earlier."

"It's okay, you don't have to apologize."

"Mind if I join you at the library again tomorrow?" He softly smiles to himself and nods as if you can see him.

"You're always welcome to join me."

♣︎ taglist: @s-nsanshine @soupbinlily @tyongff-ff @jiminiscricket @g1g1l @staytinyinmybpack @woomyteez @gfksz @bitchwhytho @savluvsmingi @thisisntmyrightera @hyukssunflower @miriamxsworld @tmtxtf @kuromibabe04 @lmnhead @carrietwrites @tournesol155 @persphonesorchid @txt-yaomi @marsattacks @mxnsxngie @h-nji @mundayoonimnida @jalapeno-princess @nakiiko @asjkdk [bold = can’t tag 🥺]

[zayray030]

Anon 🍓

I need someone probably a teacher to tell Ace this:

“You know them all to their very core… but do they know you?”

Ace is observant he notices things quickly and adapts accordingly. He’s also a good actor, constantly hiding himself behind a mask that doesn’t care and is rude. When the true Ace is blunt and kind and so much more than even he realizes.

Ace whenever he talks about any of his achievements he draws attention away from himself by saying something along the lines of “so and so showed me”. Heck I don’t even think we even know much about his past. You don’t just build a mask for no reason you make one to protect yourself.

Was he bullied? Did people avoid him like the plague? Were high expectations put on him when he was young? Why hasn’t he mentioned his mother?

Why does he down play his achievements and Why does he pretend not to care when he probably cares the most?

Is he lonely? Because no one knows the real him?

I don’t know I’m probably projecting but here’s my random thoughts

ACE ANGST FINALLY!!! Ace angst can be so rare and I fear we might not even get any from the new chapter 7 release because everyone is gonna make it about A*ey*u 😕 HOWEVER!! I shall prosper from this ask as it has actually reminded me of a VERY angsty one shot were Ace has to put on a mask to avoid something!! I'm gonna try and get it out soon!!! Might have to go on call with another Ace stan so I can get it finished because the layout is done I just need to write the words now

Ace having an older brother most likely did put some level of expectation. We do know that Ace's brother was more excited for him to get into NRC than his own parents so clearly Acr has always looked to do something original??? Almost so that he could get his parents attention so maybe that's why he switched to basketball instead of doing what his brother did

Ace's lack of a mention of a mother makes me question if that links to his explosion at Riddle where he said that kids aren't trophies for their parents

We also know that after Ace ghosted his girlfriend from MIDDLE SCHOOL a bunch of her friends yelled at him? So maybe that could contribute to his issues with getting properly close to someone and fully acknowledging an emotional situation without being ever so insensitive

Ace is so multifaceted that I could say one thing and it could be either backed up and opposed by source material

[twopoppies]

Hi Gina, hope you’re okay, just saw the news! 😕

I’m ok, darling. Thank you for thinking of me. The fires aren’t near us, so we’re safe. But the sky outside is orange and part of the high school some of my daughter’s friends go to burned down and, as far as I know, the fire is still 0% contained (our mayor seems to have cut funding so the firefighters don’t have enough water to battle it)… it’s not good.

[kohyuuu]

new ocs ! started: 2/3/25 finished: 2/6/25

im feeling really fucking sick rn and i think i have the flu so here is the kinda long awaited introductions to my three new ocs x

was going to add at least 1-2 more hcs for scarlett but im experiencing brain fog rn

anyway enjoy !

as always, androgynous reader <3

——————————

(more undercut !)

elias dunstan rivera 🐢🎧🇵🇭 (based off of rise donatello)

- he’s a philippine forest turtle

- he’s in 2 honors classes and is in ap psychology which he absolutely hates and loves

- has adhd! (inattentive type) you have to comfort him because his meds don’t work sometimes/take a while to kick in

- has an x-men hyperfixation !! (ares suggestion!)

- quiet. he’s a shy fella. will talk his head off to you over tv shows, movies and fandoms tho !!

- owns grey sony headphones (weirdly specific ik HELP) that he wears on his head or around his neck

- loves hugs (especially from you <333), just make sure to ask him first incase he’s overstimulated. he’s very indifferent to touch but doesn’t mind it when he isn’t overwhelmed

- doesn’t have a lot of friends, except for you and a few other people

- if you two are dating, he would feel insecure given how shy he is, and he feels like he wouldn’t be a good boyfriend but you reassure him he is and always will be ❤️

- kinda hates walking in the hallways at school bc it’s really loud and it overwhelms him sometimes 😕

- he is of filipino descent!!

- some people tell him he kinda looks like rottmnt’s donatello and he’s like “who??” and then they show a pic of him and he’s like “ohhh… yea we do kinda look alike ngl” HELP ME

——————————

finley singh 🐯🤼🇮🇳

- he is a bengal tiger!!

- has average grades in his classes at school (do NOT ask him about math please x)

- for an apex predator, his name doesn’t sound that threatening

- like when you think of the name finley, you wouldn’t think of a literal tiger that looks like he would beat you up in the parking lot…. 😞

- he’s on your school’s wrestling team !! he’ll jump people for you if they’re being mean to you dw x (AND ITS ON SIGHT 😛)

- finley is of indian descent :33

- he’s a soft spoken person but sometimes his voice comes out high and awkwardly loud whenever he speaks

- plays fortnite and fall guys

- owns the hatsune miku skin on fortnite and is a freaking god on fall guys

- if you two are dating, i feel like he’d be an amazing boyfriend but also a really annoying one

- he would try to find you the second he gets out of the locker room so he can walk home with you/however you get home if you’re still at school

- finley’s also the type to give big bear hugs whether you’re a close friend or his s/o, he’ll back off if you’re uncomfy ofc !!

- he chuffs when you guys hug btw and its loud af and he might pounce on you so be careful LMFAO

——————————

scarlett avery ellis 🌹🤠🇺🇸

- human!! she is black <3

- she also has adhd (combined-type) and is hyperfixated on american/cowboy/cowgirl aesthetic and music!! ❤️

- her grades in school are also average, but you and her have study dates together if you two are dating <3

- has a big american flag in her room!! she also has a corkboard with everything american/cowbody related on it in the style of an early 2000s rom-com where the character plans out something on their corkboard or smth?? (idk if y’all are getting my reference but i hope yk LMAO)

- randomly sings the intro song from american dad when she’s around you and/or some friends LMFAOO

- is best friends with elias!! you and him met thanks to her <3

- if you two are dating, i feel like scarlett would be a loving girlfriend, you guys would just do everything together (depending on your comfort). she has moments where she’s overstimulated or overwhelmed bc of something, so you’re always there for her xx <3

- she’s really big on slime rancher (first and second game), like every time you would come over to her place to hang out the first thing you see her doing when you go into her room she’s playing slime rancher on her pc 😞

- plays a lot of pj sekai. the group she chose was wonderland showtime!! (the group i chose once 😛)

- owns rdr2 on steam !!!!!! (she has over 55+ hours on it)

2/17/25 edit: SPECIAL THANKS TO MY GOOD FRIEND @ares-shithole-writing-blog !!1!1!1! he helped me come up with a few of the facts for these lovely characters xxxx

[hrts4soyeon]

Back To You

Yunjin x fem!reader 

Genre: angst, idol!au

Warnings: angst, violence(?), yelling, toxic relationship, cursing

summary: no matter how much Yunjin hurt you you couldn't ever seem to let go of her. Will you ever draw a line or will you continue to go back to her?

Word count: 7,050

a/n: this is my first time writing something other than an essay and I’m not the best in english class so if there are any spelling or grammatical errors pls ignore it i tried my best😕

i know you say you know me know me well

Jennifer huh, you had known her since 1st grade. She was a year older but you were put in a combined class with 2nd graders. You had been sitting to the side isolating yourself while everyone ate together and talked, you had always kept to yourself. This fascinated her. Jennifer was known as the popular girl who was friends with everyone. Everyone loved her because although she was popular it never seemed to change her personality. She remained the nicest person in class, always helping the teachers and students out. You weren't a bad kid either, quite the opposite actually. You took smartness to a whole new level, that was the reason you were in the mixed class, you were amongst the smartest 1st graders

You weren't hard to look at either. In fact by 3rd grade you already had admirers, but by 4th grade all of them had disappeared. Whenever one of the boys would try to talk to you you’d turn red due to your stuttering and before even 3 words were out your mouth you'd run away. 

Jennifer took interest in you, despite the fact that you constantly strayed from her. Most people would just take the hint and leave but she was persistent. This seemed very strange to you as no one ever tried this hard. You did want to be her friend but for some reason you couldn't bring yourself to even respond to her. 

By 4th grade you and Jennifer were inseparable, you two did everything together. All her persistence really did pay off in the end because by 8th grade it was her who was trying to run away from you. Of course she still loved you more than anyone but you could be overbearing at times and with her short temper things often didn't end well.

“GOD WHY CAN'T YOU GO FIND SOME OTHER FRIENDS AT SCHOOL! YOU KEEP CLINGING TO ME AND IT'S ANNOYING I CAN LITERALLY NEVER CATCH A BREAK FROM YOU!” 

‘She doesn't mean it, she doesn't mean it’ is what you'd repeat to yourself whenever these situations arrived. You'd been friends with her since before her temper was so out of control and you knew her, the real her. She said a lot of things out of anger and you knew that. She had brought this topic up before a bit more calmly and so you knew her blowing up was your doing.

“I'm sorry, I'll try to change and get more friends to stop annoying you.” you said trying to keep your voice from wavering even more than it had been. But as soon as she processed the small waver in your voice her whole demeanor shifted, you could see her physically melt. 

“I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have blown up at you like that, but you know how I get mad easily and if you had just listened to me none of this would've happened. I'm just stressed out and I hope you can forgive me, I'll try to be better and control my anger.”

“nono don’t apologize, I'm sorry I should've just listened and I will, I'll try to give you space at school.” After this left your mouth she walked up to you and hugged you.

but these days i don't even know myself (no) i always thought i'd be with someone else i thought i would own the way i felt (yeah)

“y/n, wanna come to my home after school?”

“I have a lot of homework and I have plans with mina…..” just as you were about to decline you saw her looking at you with that look, the look you could never deny.

“-but i think i could move the plans with mina to tomorrow.” at the sound of you relenting she started squealing and hugging you. 

“Meet me after 7th period and we can walk home together.” she said with a wink as she walked to her next class.

Mina Myoui, she was a year older than you just like Jennifer meaning you two didn’t share the same classes. You two shared only one class which was math. You were both also very introverted so it took a while for this friendship to blossom but once it did you were so glad Jennifer told you to find new friends. 

You stopped clinging to Jennifer as much and spent a lot more time with Mina, and found you two were very similar. You even thought you were developing a crush on her, she was just so perfect. She never got mad at you and was always calm, she loved to listen to you and your problems and to top it all off she was definitely one of the prettiest people you had come across. She had such delicate yet elegant features. She had definitely been a queen in her past life.

You wanted to tell Jennifer about this little (almost?) crush on Mina but knowing Jennifer she would probably be fuming with the thought that you’d replaced her. On top of being easily pissed off, Jennifer Huh was also a person with a lot of jealousy in her and you didn't want to do anything to upset her. 

The more you hung out with Mina the more you realized that maybe this wasn't a crush, you felt almost the same way towards Mina as you did to Jennifer. Jennifer was your bestest friend. You couldn't like her right? That would be weird, you guys had known each other since you were in 1st. You guys were basically siblings, right? The more you thought about it the more you felt sick by the thought that Jennifer saw you as just a sister.

School had ended and you were both in Jennifer's room sitting on her bed when she suddenly said ‘we need to talk’ . This took you by surprise as you didn't think you had done anything to upset her this past week, you were very nervous. Her whole demeanor changed, she sat up straight and had a serious look on her face.

“Okay uhm, I've been thinking about doing this for a while now but i haven't had the courage to actually confront you and say something about it. I uhh ever since I saw you in first grade I always thought that you were different from the rest of the students, you stayed to yourself and you uhm even when guys would talk to you or confess to you, you would always run away and you never really let anyone in. i think i was pretty determined and i eventually got you to open up and now i have you forever, and even though i can be such a shitty person and friend at times you never leave me. You could have ditched me so many times and I bet others would too, hell I would leave myself, but you never left me. You’re like the best person I know and I don't know what I'd do without you — anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I love and appreciate you so much but I don't want to be your friend anymore, I can't be.” as soon as you heard her last sentence your heart dropped in your chest and tears started welling up in your eyes, your smile now a deep frown. This couldn't be happening, Jennifer was your whole world.

“Y-y-you d-don't wanna be my f-friend any m-more?” you stuttered out the tears in your eyes almost falling as you will yourself to hold them back, but alas one single tear drop fell. With the fall of that one tear drop it was as if a dam had broken, all the tears you had tried to hold back were coming down nonstop.

Jennifer immediately reached out and wiped you tears with her thumb as she took a hold of your face. 

“No, I don't wanna be your friend, I wanna be more. I love you, but not in the way I'm supposed to, I love you as in I wanna hold and kiss you, I wanna introduce you to everyone as my girlfriend. I don't want you to like, love, or hold anyone but me, I want all your friends to know that you belong to me and I belong to you. What do you say, be my girlfriend?” hearing this you started sobbing even harder while nodding your head. Not even in your wildest dreams would you have dreamt of THE Jennifer huh, the most popular girl in your school to want you. Maybe she didn't see you as a sister after all, maybe you didn't see her as one either

Seeing you nod, Jennifer pulled your face to hers and crashed your lips together. This was all she had wanted for as long as she could remember. You tried your best to respond to her kiss but you honestly had no idea on what to do, you had never kissed anyone before. Jennifer being the most popular girl, had been in relationships so she obviously had experience.

She pulled away laughing at the fact that you couldn't respond to the kiss

“whattt, you know I've never been in a relationship nor kissed anyone.” you said whining

She chuckled and responded by saying that she’d teach you how to kiss and that you would never kiss lips that were not hers. You spent the rest of the time in her room just kissing and her demonstrating and telling you what to do.

Dating Jennifer sent you through a whirlwind of emotions. You were confused, confused about what you felt towards Mina and how that differentiated from your feelings towards Jennifer. You loved Jennifer, you really did but that left you with questions about your feelings for mina. You thought what you felt with Mina might've been a bit stronger than what you felt for Jennifer, but you couldn't risk losing them both, you weren’t sure about your feelings for Mina, not even sure if they’d be reciprocated but Jennifer was there. She loved you, you loved her, and you loved Jennifer too much to let her go, too much to put your own feelings before hers. Telling yourself that Mina was nothing more than a friend you found yourself slowly believing that. 

You couldn't tell whether you were happy or disappointed as Mina's expression did not change when you told her you were dating Jennifer. For the most part she seemed happy for you and you tried to tell yourself that you were even happier with that. 

It was a new school year, mina and Jennifer were now seniors and you a Junior. As much as you tried to tell yourself you didn't like her, your feelings for Mina were not going away as fast as they should have been and you were starting to get worried. You tried to distance yourself from Mina and told yourself it would benefit yours and Jennifer's relationship. 

Your mentality that this was the right thing came crashing down when you saw mina’s face as you bailed on her for the 2nd time that week. Telling her you had too much homework and couldn't hang out with her. The way her face fell hurt your heart and within the minute of you two  just standing there in silence you realized how selfish you had been, only thinking of your own feelings and not minas. You’d never felt more shitty, you couldn't stand seeing anyone else sad at the doings of your own especially not Mina. You immediately took back what you said and asked her if you guys could first go to your home first to finish a bit of homework before going out. 

The way her face lit up when all you had done was go through with your plans made your heart crumble. You promised yourself you'd never be the cause of a sad expression on her face again. 

The more you hung out with Mina the more you realized maybe this was the right way to get over your feelings for her. You both would talk about Jennifer and it made you realize how much you loved her and never wanted to lose her. Mina was ecstatic at seeing her best friend so happy with another. You found your mind leaving Mina and focusing on Jennifer. You questioned yourself and wondered how you ever doubted your feelings for jennifer.

I call you but you never even answer  i tell myself i'm done with wicked games

Huh Yunjin, her Korean name. Seeing as she was in Korea it only made sense for her to go by it  now. Both you and Yunjin had moved to Korea a while back, pursuing a life of fame. She was now a trainee at HYBE while you were at JYP. The original plan was for you two to enter the same company but fate had other plans. The day Yunjin was accepted into HYBE you were accepted into JYP. You both had applied to a lot of agencies and been accepted but these were the first BIG companies to reach out to you. Taking into account that you’d see Mina more often you accepted the fact that HYBE didn't accept you and chose to join JYP. 

“This is the second time you’ve called her within the 30 minutes you’ve been here, just accept that she's not picking up.'' Mina said with a groan as you put your phone down. 

“She never answers, I know she’s probably overwhelmed with work right now seeing as she's set to debut in a month but I wish she could at least send me a text.” 

“But aren't you set to debut in 2 months, just barely a month after her?” Mina responded making you think about it. But it was different, her debut was closer to happening than yours. You knew of her dream to be famous and you shared that dream with her, if she wanted to be an idol she had to prioritize that over everything, right? You understood that and so that's what you said to mina. 

“She's gonna debut sooner though and I can't be her top priority, her job has to be.” after processing what you had just said minas head snapped towards you looking at you like you had gone mad. 

“I'M an idol y/n i've been an idol for years and trust me when i say that's not an excuse, don't you remember when you were still in New York and i was in Korea? Although I was an idol I still made time for you. Look at yourself, you're in the same position as her yet here you are clearly prioritizing her.” you didn't know what to say in response to this, you wanted to deny it to say that you've matured, that you didn't let Yunjin walk over you anymore but even you knew that was a lie. 

“Okay okay, I'll talk to her after things are less stressful for her and I'll make sure that she sees me as a priority, and I'll make sure she sticks to her word.”

But then i get so numb with all the laughter  that i forget about the pain

You were currently in Yunjins dorm which she shared with Eunchae and Chaewon. You all were in the kitchen eating, you found yourself coming here often after their debut. You had come to talk to her about her recent behavior, how she promised she would change but hadn’t at all. You got caught up with everything else though and the thought to tell her completely slipped your mind. 

“So y/n how does it feel to have your official debut in a couple of weeks?” Chaewon asked

“Honestly it feels unreal. I still can't believe it's gonna happen, I'm so excited.” you responded, a huge grin on your face at the thought that your name would be out there in a couple of weeks.

“Okay now for the good stuff, who's your favorite member?” Eunchae asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

“They're all my favorite butttt haewonnie, and only ‘cause we’re closer.” you responded. You loved them all but if you were being honest it was definitely Haewon. They all gasped at the revelation. You noticed Yunjin looking at you a bit weird but you brushed it off saying it was nothing. 

“Okay, okay but who’s your favorite le sserafim member?” Chaewon asked, all three of them looked at you expectantly 

“Hmmm, if I had to choose Kazuha.” You said her name really fast, almost slurring it but they all had caught it and saw the grin growing on your face. 

“I'M TELLING KAZUHA UNNIE THIS!” Eunchae shouted as she pulled out her phone to text this to Kazuha. 

“We’re over, I can’t date someone who prefers my member over me.” Yunjin said in faux disappointment, acting as if she would start crying. 

You got up, walked around the island and went to hug her while saying sorry and that you loved her more while laughing. 

“Okay but you don’t count because my love for you is indescribable and if I were to bring you into it then none of your members would even have a chance.” She seemed to be satisfied by this and grabbed your face to plant a soft sweet kiss on your lips 

“EWWW THERE'S A KID HERE!” Eunchae said, screaming while covering her eyes. 

Chaewon on the other hand was awwwing at how cute you too were while you had your face flushed red and hidden in Yunjin's chest. You and Yunjin had been dating for years yet you still had the same red face every time she initiated physical contact. 

(Woah)You stress me out, you kill me, you drag me down, you fuck me up we're on the ground, we're screamin' i dont know how to make it stop i love it, i hate it, and i can't take it but i keep on comin' back to you

“God, you’re so possessive. get over it! I can have friends other than you, you’re always trying to dictate my relationships and I’m SO over it!” She yelled at you, and you whimpered at her harsh words

Your lips slowly formed a pout feeling your lips wobbling, a telltale sign you were gonna start crying. Usually the sight of you crying would calm Yunjin down but it didn’t this time, it only infuriated her more. 

“Oh my god, no way you’re gonna start crying now.” She said in disbelief as you tried to hold back your tears to prove her wrong.

“I'm sorry for actually feeling emotions, unlike you. Am i not allowed to be upset when i see millions of people shipping you, MY girlfriend with another. And it's not like you do anything to beat the dating allegations. Pulling her onto your lap calling her pet names you should be using on ME!” you said panting as you had screamed all that out. 

You thought that maybe getting all that out she’d understand at least a little of how you were feeling. You saying all that though was a huge mistake, it only made her even more mad, you only realized your mistake when you saw her mouth open and the look on her face of complete rage.

“Ohh so now this is my fault? My fault for being comfortable with my friends? Have you ever seen me comment on your relationship with Mina? You're basically dating her with how close you two are, you call her every name in the book, you literally call her your soulmate. Have I ever said anything about that? No, because unlike you I was happy when you finally found a friend that wasn't me and I encouraged your friendship with her if anything. Stop acting as if you own me, you're genuinely such a shitty person, what the hell do you want from me? For me to completely isolate myself from all the girls? As my girlfriend you should be happy for me, that i have such good friends in my group but nooo. This is what I get? I can really see where your priorities are.” if you weren't crying before you were definitely sobbing by now.

You were always a sensitive person and hearing all this coming from her made you wanna bury yourself in a hole. You never felt more selfish and it made you so mad at yourself for only thinking of your feelings. You understood where she was coming from and all you could think of was how to make this up to her. 

You knew you could counter her points easily as you and mina still had boundaries and she knew about how you ignored mina for the first few weeks of you two dating. It was because you were unsure of your feelings towards Mina but that wasn't the only reason. You saw that Yunjin was getting jealous with the thought that you cared more about Mina as more than a friend. This was also a major reason as to why you distanced yourself from Mina. 

You also talked to her about it, you asked her if she was comfortable and fine with you and mina being friends. After that conversation she never doubted your relationship with mina. You could also bring up the fact that you and Mina shut down ANY idea of you two dating when your friendship was first discovered by the public. You had always made it known how good of a friend  Mina was. You and Mina were known as nothing more than friends. 

But alas, you didn't want to fight anymore, you just wanted this to stop. You loved her and she loved you and as her lover causing these problems shouldn't be a thing you should do.

“I'm sorry babe, you're right I was being unreasonable and you are allowed to have friends, i don't want you to think you aren't. I just really don't want to fight anymore. Can we please just go to sleep? I love you and I don't like fighting with you.” you said sniffling and wiping your tears as you walked towards her wanting a hug. 

You could tell by the way she wrapped her arms around you she didn't want to, but seeing you crying and looking to her for comfort for the tears she caused made her happy. She was happy that she was the one you found comfort in no matter the reason, but it did not overlook the fact that she was still MAD. you were aware of this fact yet you didn't let it phase you as you held onto her shirt tighter burying your face in her chest as you gripped her shirt in your fists.

Yunjin wanted so badly to embrace you tighter but she couldn't, she wouldn't. You needed to know that you couldn't just pull this shit then expect it all to go away as soon as you cry. It hurt her to hurt you like this but your words really made her mad and the more she thought of your guyses fight the more her sympathy for you left. 

She wouldn't leave you alone crying though, as mad as she was at you she wasn't heartless and she still cared for you a lot. She picked you up bridal style and carried you to your room, your face still buried in her shirt and you hiccuped in between your sobs. She laid you down slowly and as soon as her back hit the bed you snuggled up against her and soon enough you fell asleep. When your members came back to the dorm they awwed at the sight of you two snuggled up together and took pictures of it not knowing about the fight that transpired leading up to it. 

The next morning when you awoke she was gone, all she left behind was a small note saying to text her when you weren't as selfish and didn't think you could dictate her relationships. You silently sobbed as you read the note knowing you couldn't cry too loud or else your members would hear and they would worry for you.

You didn't want anyone to see Yunjin in a bad light, especially not your members. That morning Yunjin’s phone was blown up with messages from you telling her how sorry you were and that you would never ‘dictate’ her relationships again, and begging her to respond(she didn't). 

I know my friends they give me bad advice, like move on get you out my mind, but don't you think i haven't even tried you got me cornered and my hands are tied

It had been a whole two weeks since Yunjin had unofficially ended things with you, you hadnt left bed other than to go to mina’s dorm and lay in her bed. The only thing that kept you going was the thought that she hadn’t fully ended things. 

“Dude, just stop thinking of her, it's that simple. If you don't think of her you won't remember what happened and you won't be depressed. Also when will you tell your members about the break up?” Mina said from right next to you as you were both lying in her bed. 

“Ughhh it's really not as easy as you say, you've been there since we started dating. Of all people you should get that, and it's not like I wanna be hung up on her, and it’s not an official break up, just a break. Shes doing this for the stupidest fucking reason too, Like maybe if it was something serious but this!? This is literal bullshit.” you said your arms flailing around trying to get your disbelief at this whole situation out. 

“Babe you and I both know you definitely don't wanna get over her with those daily messages and I think I know the reason you haven't told your members. I just wanna hear you say it so you can hear for yourself how badly you still want her.”

“Okay, maybe I don't wanna get over her, but is that so unexpected? We've been together for years. I love her more than anyone, and yes i haven't told the members because if she does accept my apologies and does take me back then i don't want them to see her in a bad light. I don't wanna give them a reason to dislike her because I know they'll hold it against her by seeing how badly the ‘breakup’ affected me.” you replied looking down at the fingers you were fiddling with.

Even mina didn't know the full truth, she obviously knew most of it but not all of it, always the one to protect Yunjin you were. She obviously knew about how bad Yunjin’s anger issues were, that was common knowledge. You had told her about the fight but left out the parts that you could've said to counter Yunjins statement. 

She didn't think either of you were wrong, although she obviously favored you as you were her best friend. She wanted to hate Yunjin for doing this to you and making you so sad but she couldn't. Not with knowing how much the girl loved you. She knew this would pass, no way you two could stay away from each other.

You got me so addicted to the drama i tell myself i'm done with wicked games but then i get so numb with all the laughter that i forget about the pain

Minas' predictions turned out to be true, the next day Yunjin messaged you back. You were ecstatic, she had asked to meet up with you to talk and you obviously agreed. 

“I'm so sorry Jen, I was really wrong and I don't think I can bear to lose you. You're the love of my life, the only person I'll ever love, please take me back.” you said all in one breath looking at her intently.

“Nono, I'm sorry,I was such a dick. I promise you I'll never do ‘this’ again or even hurt you again. This break made me realize how much I needed you and how much I can't live without you. I love you so much, so please, will you take me back?” she asked with uncertainty as she stared at you, you felt the same way you felt back in her room all those years ago when she confessed to you, and she looked the same. 

Your reply was obviously a yes, a big yes. You jumped on her and squeezed her as tight as you could while crying. You were so happy, this was WAY more than what you expected, she had actually reflected on her actions and apologized. You were over the moon.

And I guess you’ll never know  all the bullshit that you put me through and i guess you'll never know, no

Breaking news: LE SSERAFIM’s Huh Yunjin seen out with aespas Ningning! Both of them getting a little closer than usual friends, if the angles were better god knows what we’d have seen.

What. The. Fuck. Those were your only thoughts as you read through the article then saw the pictures below. You couldn’t tell because of the angle but it definitely looked like they were kissing. You didn’t know how to feel, your members burst into your room looking at you worriedly. By the look on your face they could tell you had seen the news. 

Everything was hazy, you just asked Haewon to drive you to Minas place and she obliged seeing the state you were in. You were completely silent the whole way there, the whole car was silent except the faint sound from the outside of the car. It was like you had turned off your emotions, but as soon as you saw Mina waiting there on the sidewalk for you you burst out into tears

Mina knew you’d come to her after reading the news of what happened and so she sat there waiting at the gate of her apartment building. As soon as you stepped out of the car she saw that you burst into tears. She ran up and to your side to hug you and lead you into her apartment.

You knew that many other people lived in this building and that they could all see you sobbing into Mina’s shirt but you didn’t let that phase you. Other opinions on you were the last thing on your mind. 

“I’m going to beat the fucking shit outta her.” Those were the first words to leave Mina's mouth once you entered her flat. 

She was pacing around the room, her hands running through her hair, you didn't think you'd ever seen her more mad. Mina was always the calm one, the one who never let anything get to her. This time Mina was livid, she was so done with Yunjin pulling this type of stupid shit and you forgiving her,

You wanted to say something, scream even, but you couldn’t get any words out of your mouth. Whenever you started crying really hard, the sobs would always be followed up with hiccups and because of this you couldn’t seem to speak. 

“I…” you felt so frustrated, you wanted to speak, tell her how mad you were but you couldn't seem to get it out.

Seeing this Mina sat down next to you, her anger seeming to dissolve at the sight of you, she wrapped her arms around you and didnt say anything. She just sat there with you, Mina had known you since you were in 8th grade, she knew how to calm you down. 

After a while of crying you calmed down a bit. The small things Mina had been whispering to you had helped a lot and you finally felt like you could speak.

“I-I can't believe she would do this, I can't believe she would throw everything away like this— am I not good enough? Where did I go wrong?” you sobbed out into Minas shirt.

Minas heart broke seeing your state of distress, she had never been more mad. She wanted to kill Yunjin at that very moment, you deserved so much better than that cheating bitch. She wanted desperately to say this to you but she knew it wouldn't do you any good so she kept these feelings to herself.  

NMIXX’s l/n y/n seen crying at TWICE’s Mina’s apartment building with Mina comforting her just 20 minutes after Huh Yunjin was seen with Ningning. Could there be a connection between these two idols? We’re aware of Yunjin and y/n’s friendship but could it be something more?

Comments:

Anonymous: omg i was there when y/n arrived at the building, mina ran to her side and guided her all the way up. Poor y/n she's so lucky to have a good friend like mina but istg if huh yunjin had anything to do with this ill hunt her down. 

Anonymous: this is what ive been saying!!! y/n and yunjin are wayyy too close to be normal friends. Huh yunjin sucks ass, she cheated on my girl y/n and god knows what else shes done. 

Anonymous: y/n come be with me, id never cheat on you or put you through what yunjin does. God knows how yunjin even pulled y/n, y/n is like an angel and to cheat on her is actually insane. Who in their right mind would cheat on THE l/n y/n!

Fuck, fuck, fuck. That was the only word going through Yunjins mind, how could she have been so careless and gotten caught? As she read the comments on the article she felt even worse than before, y/n gave her everything she needed. Why did she have to be so dumb? Why had she gone out and ruined everything? 

As soon as Yunjin arrived at her dorm she mentally prepared herself for what her members were gonna say. She took a deep breath, unlocked the door and entered. She found all of her members sitting on the couch in her living room in silence as she walked in and headed towards them. Kazuha had to be physically restrained by Chaewon so as to not hurt Yunjin right then and there. She was the closest out of the members to you and she wanted nothing more than to deck Yunjin in the face. 

“Why, why would you do that to her? She's literally the girlfriend ANYONE would kill for, she's perfect, she could easily bag anyone in this industry yet she chose you. Why would you do this to her?” Chaewon asked Yunjin in a calm tone which surprised Yunjin, she looked like she'd explode any minute. Her face was red and Yunjin could almost see the smoke coming out of her ears.

“I don't know, I don't know, I don't know why I did it, I wish I didn't. I really wish I could take it back.” Yunjin said, her hand running through her hair as she stood in front of everyone.

“You only wish you could take it back because you were caught, if this wasn't released i bet you wouldn't regret it, hell I bet you’d do it again.” Kazuha said and Yunjin could hear the anger seeping into her voice. 

Yunjin couldn't say anything to retort that because she honestly didn't know if she would. she wanted to say she wouldn't that she regretted it because she loved you but was that really the truth?

(yeah) so you can cut me up and kiss me harder you can be the pill to ease the pain 'cause i know i'm addicted your drama baby here we go again

“Baby please, just listen to me, please just give me a chance to explain.” Yunjin begged as she stood at Mina's door, Mina had made the mistake of opening it not knowing who was at the door and now Yunjin wouldn't leave. 

“Get the fuck out.” Mina said through gritted teeth, she had balled her fists up, and was trying her best not to hit Yunjin. She swore if she didn't leave in the next 5 minutes she wouldn't hold back anymore, for the sake of you though, she endured 5 minutes.

“Please just let me talk to her.” Yunjin begged as she tried to look over Mina's shoulders to get a look at you but Mina had completely blocked any views inside. 

“I swear to god if you don't leave right now…'' Mina said, again trying to get Yunjin to leave but for obvious reasons Yunjin hadn't given up and Mina had counted 5 minutes. 

Mina had never been a violent person, nor someone to get angry easily but Yunjin was really getting on her nerves and her not leaving pissed her off even more. The next action Mina took came as a big surprise to Yunjin because she would have expected this from anyone but mina. Mina had decked Yunjin square in the face. 

Mina had not held back AT ALL on this punch as it sent Yunjin to the ground with a bleeding nose and a cut on her lip caused by Mina’s ring. She held her face in her hands as she looked at Mina dumbfounded. She got up but she didn't attempt to hit Mina in return. She knew this was of her own doing and Mina was not to blame for being a good friend. 

Hearing a loud thump on the ground, you ran out of Mina's room and to the door to see Yunjin with blood dripping from her mouth and nose. You held your hand over your mouth in a gasp as you looked at Mina. She simply shrugged and said ‘she had it coming’ you brushed past Mina and out the door to Yunjin.

“Mina I'm gonna go with her now, if she's this determined to talk to me then I guess i have to talk to her. You kissed Mina on the cheek and hugged her as you whispered ‘i'll be fine’ in her ear. This didn't help calm down Mina's worries though. 

“Anything happens you call me, alright?” you nodded in response to this as you left with Yunjin letting her wrap her arm around your waist.(only because she was hurt right?)

As you two reached the ground level of the building you realized that you two would most likely be seen by paparazzi. They would see her bloodied face, as you were gonna start worrying about that you felt Yunjin come to a stop, you were in front of her car.

“I'm driving.” you said with no room for arguing, hearing your tone she simply handed you the car keys as she got in the passenger's seat. 

The car ride to her dorm was relatively silent, you figured you were gonna go there, seeing as if you were to take her to your dorm she’d definitely leave with a couple of broken bones. Yunjin was on her phone to text into the le sserafim group chat to tell them to leave because she was bringing you there. 

While waiting in the elevator to reach the floor in which her dorm resided you were scrolling on your phone and you saw your earlier suspicions confirmed. There was an article written on how Yunjin had left your dorm with blood on her face and holding you. You almost laughed at how fast they were to write these articles. 

You still couldn't believe this was happening, everything was happening so fast you almost didn't process it, this felt like a dream. A really really bad dream, you even pinched yourself in case this was a dream. If this was a dream it would definitely be the worst one you've had. 

When you two entered her dorm it was completely empty, she led you to her room and motioned you to sit down next to her on her bed. As much as you hated her at this moment you didn't want to leave her with blood on her face as you talked to her so without saying anything you went to enter the bathroom that was connected to her room. 

You practically lived here, even having a toothbrush left here so you knew where everything was. You looked in the drawer that had all the first aid stuff and pulled out the first aid kit. You sat down facing her on the bed and she turned her body to face you too. You took her face in your hand as you picked up an alcohol pad and gently wiped the blood off of her cut lip. 

Usually this would hurt but even when you were kids, Yunjin never made a big deal when she was hurt. She was always strong, especially when it came to getting hurt. As a kid you admired her for this, you always thought she was really cool for keeping a smile on her face when the teachers would put alcohol on her injuries. 

You would always call her your strong girl, she loved that nickname and you loved her. But would she even be your girl anymore? The thought that she wouldn't be made you want to lock yourself in a room and never leave. She was the only person you would ever love. if it wasn't her you wouldn't love anyone else, you only wanted her. But did she even want you?

You didn't notice when you started crying, you only realized it when you felt her soft hand caress your face. She slowly wiped your tears and when you realized you were crying you started crying even harder. 

“Why? Why did you have to like someone else? Where did i go wrong, i only ever loved you and i'll only ever love you. Please don't leave me, you're all I have, I swear I'll be a better girlfriend. I swear I'll make you love me more.” you begged in between sobs, you told yourself you wouldn't go back, you couldn't.

But you couldn't help it, you would always go back to her.

[444m777]

15 years ago today…

I was roughly three months fresh of turning 17 years old. I felt indifferent about that number and sort of wished I could stay 16 a little longer but I knew I was getting closer to being considered an “adult” and in that case it was exciting because I would be moving abroad and living on my own once I graduated from high school. There was nothing really special about that day. I was home alone after school. Took off my shoes and just did what any regular-degular teenager would do, watch TV.

Aside from plotting how I’d ever make it to London without ever traveling that far before I figured one could dream like I always did. Like I had to because I had the kind of parents who did not like the fact that I was (still am) a Michael Jackson fan. They saw it as an obsession and basically it got to a point where I was “banned” from mentioning his name, listening to his music even though I didn’t own any CDs at the time. The only thing I had growing up as a little girl was the Moonwalker VHS tape and I almost destroyed it because I watched it a billion times for years. My parents would always make sure we had a movie night and as soon as they asked for suggestions everyone would butt in before I could get a word out, “WE ARE NOT WATCHING MOONWALKER! Anything but that!”. As a little girl that shit tore me apart.

My parents introduced me to the world of magic that is MJ. They showed me Thriller. And I innocently referred to the female ghoulish monsters as my grandmother (oops…🤪) everyone burst out in laughter. It was cute I was maybe 3-4 years old at the time. But when I turned 5 I was allowed to watch the whole Moonwalker movie and my own mother told me she regrets getting it and showing it to me. I was maybe 9-10 years old when she said that to me out of anger. She read my diaries at the time and saw all the newspaper clippings I had of Michael because they just wouldn’t let me buy any merch/CDs. And in it I wrote how I felt about him and how I wanted to be with him at Neverland Ranch. Mind you this was also the time where it was super uncool to be an MJ fan. Like, you’d get DISOWNED from your friend group, family etc. it was THAT bad. Coming from a Black Caribbean background. I virtually had no one to talk to about Michael. Hence, the diaries.

I, in some way, related to how lonely he felt. In my innocent child’s mind I just felt really close to him and I felt he would understand me better than my own immediate family would. Anyways, I CLINGED to my Moonwalker VHS tape until I somehow broke it from watching it a trillion times too much😅. My world SHATTERED. It was the only MJ thing I had before I got the newspaper clippings because of the allegations. Whenever we went to a music store or an airport that had a music store I wasn’t allowed in the section that had Michael’s music. I’d get dragged away. It was ROUGH for little fangirl me😕 I don’t know how I survived it. And I’m not even trying to sound dramatic but I was a sensitive, PAINFULLY shy, introverted and moved to tears EASILY kinda girl. I had (and still have) very BIG feelings and I had no one to help me navigate them. Maybe I’ll make another post about my journey as an MJ fan on a super tiny island and how I “made it work” but really I want to focus on how as a teenager I found out he passed.

Flipping through channels I came across a news channel that claimed he died. I immediately took it as a hoax and switched to another news channel and they didn’t report anything. So I remember pausing the TV (we had DVR at the time) and went upstairs to shower. I kept telling myself this was all a sick joke. I came back downstairs and pressed play and forwarded to real time and they said he really did die. So I did the one thing I thought was smart and decided that if CNN didn’t report he died then he didn’t and everybody from the smaller news channels were in on some terrible lie to generate views because of his concerts coming up in London. But I finally switched to CNN and it was written so boldly on the screen I wasn’t even sitting but something told me to sit because my body felt weak and I plopped down on the couch. It took a while to register and then I was hysterical. Home alone yet living with people who banned me from talking about him and getting caught listening to his music or writing about him. I had a secret stash of MJ related things. I had a friend who took her mother’s Dangerous cassette tape and borrowed it to me to listen. My sister’s best friend’s dad had the History Album and she gave it to my sister to give it to me. That’s honestly the one thing my sister did for me that felt super profound. Because she was also told not to fuel my “obsession”. She didn’t care for MJ but she wasn’t mean about it either. But we both lived under our parents’ house and rules and as a Black girl with Black Caribbean parents… let’s just say you don’t question or go behind their back if you know what’s good for you. Once just ONCE my dad let me buy the Dangerous dvd. We were at the airport and he was hesitant. I remember it like it was yesterday… “you KNOW your mother doesn’t want you getting anything MJ related! I’m not letting you buy this”. But at the last minute he still let me get it and he said “it’s just the music videos I suppose this is fine…” oh, how it was not. That got taken away too. So you see I had to hide whatever anyone could spare. I was not even allowed to read the newspaper at one point because my mother found I would cut out pictures of him. THE NEWSPAPER Y’ALL!!! If I needed the newspaper for school work I’d get it with pages removed. Or my mom would pull out the pages I needed.

Back to being a total mess on the couch… my parents came home and I wiped my face and tears. I remember opening the door. I figured I’m older now. He passed away. It should be okay to at least say something about it. I remember opening the door and I could barely get the words out. I said “did you hear the news about Michael?” And she responded “yeah… jammer”. I come from a Caribbean island that’s been colonized by the Dutch so we use Dutch words in our creole language, Papiamento. But the way she said jammer (what a shame) was in such a nonchalant I-don’t-really-care way. Her tone was evident. I almost slammed the door shut in her face but I let her hold the door and I ran upstairs and was hysterical again.

I remember my father coming up to check on me but he stood in the door way. I was just curled up in bed crying and he left me there. Both of them left me there. I was a mess for DAYS. WEEKS. I became depressed. And again, I had no one to help me navigate these very BIG feelings. And it pained me. I didn’t have friends who were MJ fans. So I couldn’t talk to them. All I heard at school was “good riddance” or worse. As an adult I realized I just wanted someone to sit with me. Hold space for me. No one helped me through it during 2003 to the 2005 trials. No one helped me through it in 2009. I had to do it on my own and it SUCKED! You’re either met with “but you never met the man!” or “he was XYZ anyways so why does it matter, he’s dead!”. I was a CHILD! No one thought “damn… this is having a huge effect on our highly sensitive daughter and she’s clearly depressed. At the very least let’s hold space for her” NOPE! I learned very young to keep secrets. To never share myself like that with people in fear of being ridiculed. I hid myself, my passions and my thoughts. Despite growing up and excelling in anything that had to do with art (because I wanted to be like Mike lol). I kept it a secret. My grades showed it but anything else I kept it from my family. My friends kinda knew but they didn’t know what or WHO the driving force was. Where the inspiration came from. I always had to come up with some other story or muse. I wouldn’t dare mention Michael in fear my mother would appear out of nowhere and would “discipline me” for saying his name. He was my real life Voldemort and in my tiny kid brain I had to defend him in my mind because there was no way I could go up against anyone else let alone adults. My family but mostly my mother really did a number on me…

I’m writing this to say that what my family did and how the world negatively responded left a stain on my soul. Turned me from introvert and shy to soooo painfully shy I didn’t want to leave my room. Didn’t want to express myself in fear of being asked where the inspiration came from. Ironically as an adult my parents have been asking me why I’m not being creative and for a very long time I wish I could tell them it’s because they snuffed that part me, ever since I was a child, out! They couldn’t nurture that side of me and chose to see my devotion as blind obsession.

But this year and even more so today I had a huge breakdown earlier in the year and I realized I wanted to express myself and my thoughts more and speak freely about Mike. Mind you, I moved out at 18 and lived and studied in The Netherlands, Indonesia and Thailand. Still I kept that part of me which was and is a HUGE part of me, a secret. I brought it up once with a guy I had a date with and like I said, BIG feelings kinda gal, I broke down crying talking to him about Michael. And I apologized profusely and figured he’d never want to see me again. And yet he held me and comforted me. He did the one thing I craved the people who loved me should have done when I was a child. I swore on that day I’d marry that man. I did not… yet. We’re still together 7 years later and today too and every day since he has held space for me. Allowed me to be the fan I always wished I could’ve been even if it was in private with him. He lets me talk about anything MJ like he’s a fan himself (he is not but he has an immense amount of respect for Michael). And he’s always encouraged me to reach out to the MJ community but like I said the trauma, and again, not trying to be dramatic but to be told as a kid up until I left the house that I can’t talk, listen, watch nor dance to Michael was like being told I wasn’t allowed to eat, was DEEP and it made me associate expressing myself as a bad thing, a dirty thing. Because liking Michael was seen as gross. So I never engaged online for fear of my mother somehow finding me on the internet. Yeah… it was that bad😖

But it wasn’t all bad. And I’d like to share more about that in the future😌. I’m done feeling like my mother or anyone else for that matter has a say in how I feel and how I choose to express my love for Michael. That man pulled me through so many things throughout my life. I know this is a very heavy and sad day. It’s really tough for some to see the bright side. Because Michael being alive was the bright side. Even if he chose never to show his face again in public but to just know he was alive, safe and in good health probably would’ve been more than enough for fans to handle than knowing he’s truly gone. Unfortunately, that’s not the case and his life ended tragically.

I still choose to use this day as a reminder to myself of his tireless yet bright FIRE that he had and how he went against the grains of racism and ignorance, and striving to innovate, to push the envelope and go beyond. The sky was never the limit. I, too, want to use that energy and look past my upbringing and connect with other likeminded fans/people and truly engage the way I wish I would’ve years ago after leaving home. No more hiding. No more shaming myself and most certainly no more apologizing for speaking about Michael. I’m doing myself a disservice and I want to honor his memory by keeping on with the force! 🕺🏾

I love you so much Michael and I miss you like crazy and I’m so grateful for your presence and your passion for sharing your gift and life’s work with us. I feel you in the air and especially in the trees and in the animals. You solidified my belief in magic and wonder. I am so damn happy I am breaking free from these chains and really celebrating you OUT IN THE OPEN WHOLEHEARTEDLY. To the fans out there struggling I have you in my thoughts. And if you ever, EVER need someone to talk to because it’s difficult to talk to anyone else out there, you got me. I don’t ever want any of the fans to feel isolated and stuck. Especially the younger fans. You are the generation who will continue to keep Michael’s legacy going. Not only that you are the future in general and young kids/people need to be protected, loved and guided. Not the opposite and especially not made to feel like your feelings are invalid. Your mental health is so important even when you’re a fan of someone whom you’ve never met. And it is equally important to talk freely and openly in a safe space without being made to feel like you’re a criminal.

Anyways… if you read up until here, wow, thanks! Sending you all lots of love, hugs and heehees💫

[t00them00n]

Gravity

Masterlist

Part 1

Eren x reader

TMI but this was originally abt a guy i knew in school who i was crushing on,, it was years ago so i found it in my notes thinking it was abt a character😭😭 i quite liked it tho so i just swapped some features and now its eren,, i MIGHT continue it😋

Not proof read😕 prob will later

You sat in your spinning chair with nothing to do having already done the work. You didn’t hate this lesson in fact it was quite the opposite; you liked it therefore you finished things too quickly freeing up your time a bit too much.

Spinning and spinning and spinning, you stop urself slowly before it begins to make your head hurt. Stopping in your tracks, you’re direction of thought paused as you caught a clearer glance of the person diagonal to you, no longer blurred by the turning of your chair.

He too (and a few in the class) had already finished his work causing his eyes to also travel the room out of boredom. Your focus diverted to him, he was actually rather attractive when you really pinpointed his features, his sharp jawline, his pulled back hair, his ever so slightly slanted nose, his piercing green eyes, his broad and skinny hands, his muscular yet somehow lanky body structure—

You’ve been staring for too long although you are glad you looked away before he’d realise your unintentionally creepy manner.

With only boredom to blame as the sounds from the class blends into mere background noise, your mind begins to wander deeper.

Its only your imagination, who would know? Who would be able to tell? Its not like anyone is attentively trying to guess my every next move and thought.

Your eyes travel back to his shoulders, then once again his arms and once again his hands. His hands.

You cant help what your unfiltered brain decides to think? Its not your fault that you begin to imagine what his hands might feel like when running up and down your figure, its hopefully not your fault either as your mind runs to more lewd thoughts regarding his hands.

Quickly shooing away the strange thoughts judging yourself heavily as your eyes frantically dart around the room. A rush of guilt and frustration runs over you as you are just so so so bored. You swear you won’t let yourself get distracted next time, you don’t want to let this be a habit.

You’ve always known he wasn’t bad to look at, stealing glances every now and then. But this class was the only one you had with him, other than that you rarely saw him on campus.

Class comes to an end and everyone begins to packs up. You have no friends in this class either, Sasha and Connie have a free period during this lesson. With all the new busy movement in the classroom you feel slightly more at ease to stare again.

Shamelessly you eye him as he talks to two of his friends. One of them is blonde and shorter than him and the other is around his height and a lighter brunette than him. You recognise the brunette, Jean, having met him occasionally whenever he was with Connie and Sasha.

Both of them have their backs turned from you, facing him as they converse. You see them begin to move as the three are now walking to the exit. He smiles flashing his typical boyish grin while his green eyes light up as he laughs a little at whatever his friends were talking about. As he is about to exit, he scans the room ever so briefly catching your eyes for just a millisecond.

You turn away even though he is already gone, embarrassed in case your gawking was obvious.

[akaakeis]

sav the terriblest thing has happened......... i joined english coaching.............

okay its not that bad the guy was my ninth grade english teacher and hes kind of a w

i also found out my current english teacher is mentally ill and not one of her students got 90+ in english like..

#notmepls

ANYWAYS

this Means that i shall be offline when ur usually first online during the day on sundays tuesdays and thursdays throws up

ive alr been so busy and i was like omg #textingsav and then i realised we probably wont talk today and also the only time we'll talk is

wait omg no school tmr we WILL talk tmr which will be ur today

the way im just. rambling in ur inbox but its ok bc ur u and im me #neverdoingthisanywhereelse

next thing . wait i forgot im remembering

oKAY remembered 👍 ERM i got like a. 68 on my english test and apparently this mentally ill woman marked it wrong and i shouldve gotten an erm. wait calculating. at least an 88 LIKE GIRL WHAT THE FREAKKKKKKKKK

in other news erm why i cried in the last four days list .

i love my sister

i love my friends

english grade

teacher yelled at me

there was no garlic bread at home

i got disconnected from dti

i didnt want to get up and change

the electricity cut off five times and i couldnt play genshin properly

tumblr wasnt loading

86 eighty-six

hashtag periods i love periods

in other news i also love maths like i WAS a maths girl i AM a maths girlie i will always BE a maths girlie it is THE subject of all time and if anyone disagrees then they're wrong (unless it's u because what can i say. i always agree with cute girls🤷‍♀️)

also like i said id tell you about the smau but literally erm. i forgot.. what was supposed to happen.. i have two lines ill dm them to u or something 😭😭😭😭 WAIT I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING ELSE AND THEN I FORGOT IT IM GOING TO SOB.

OH YES spilling school tea

our chem teacher used to tutor this one girl and he flirted with her mom at 1am on wahtsapp and facebook and then his wife divorced him😭😭

this one girl's picture got taken. like a norm picture. and then her bf and some people fought over it. like physically. at coaching. LOL INSANE

english physics and chemistry departments of our school are failing everyone is underpaid and leaving

my english teacher is senile but we mentioned that already i think

ANYWAYSSSS UNINTENTIONAL YAP ASK I LITERALLY JUST CAME HERE TO SAY IM MORE BUSY THAN BEFORE LMFAO. look where we are. oh omg im so #scared #excited #terrified for us w/o u part 2 thats flipping SCARY IM SCARED anyways how are u? feel free to yap in the answers if u do answer it and uhhh take care stay safe love u mwa mwa dm me whenever

LINA MY LOVE!! this is gonna be long i fear. oh dear.... ok so english coaching is not fun good luck with that 😕

well at least the guy is cool ‼️

im sorry but lowkey... #wbk about that one i fear!! I ALWAYS THOUGHT SHE WAS A LITTLE MENTALLY ILL? IS THAT JUST ME OR

anyway if u dont get 90+ in english send her my way I WILL FIGHT FOR YOUR GRADE SO HARD you deserve a good grade!!! i can tell you've been putting in the effort + im proud of u!!1!!1!1

NOOOOOO WE WONT BE ABLE TO TALK AS MUCH 🙁 lwt me think so today is thursday and youll be on on mondays wednesdays fridays + saturdays as normal presumably? THATS OKAY i usually wake up latw on thursdays because i sleep late and its a whole mess... i was nearly late this morning harhar ANYWAY POINT BEING WE WILL STILL BE ABLE TO TALK TO WE'LL BE GOOD

girl me too <//3 was so locked in on tuesday you should've seen me writing my article for the magazine + writing out the rest of my speech and finalizing ITS SO BUSY RN ICB IT

these timezones are confusinf me hello i am so lost as i read this! 12 hrs apart w you ahead is all ik regarding this

ANYWAY WE WILL FIND TIME AND WE WILL MAKE IT WORK ITLL JUST TAKE A MINUTE FOR ME TO FIGURE IT OUT

its okay i live laugh love for ur asks actually im sitting in my room smiling as i type out this reply to ur ask... inbox yap hour MY FAV

A 68 IS ACTUALLY INSANE GOODBYE how did she screw up the grade so bad 😭 she can catch these fists for that one LIKE HOW DO U GET IT 20% OFF THIS IS NOT A CLEARANCE SALE MISS!!

HELP all of these reasons are equally valid 😞 periods really get me fucked up fr i think im about to get mine too smh

that is SO valid lina math is honestly a good subject 🙂‍↕️ not my fav but i honestly enjoy the class cause it's 1) simple for me 2) my tablemates are so odd to the point of being hilarious and 3) my teacher is gay and we found his grindr profile so i always giggle when i think about that HAHDBDN so math class is just heaps of fun

NOOOO I WAS SO EXCITED TO HESR ABT THE SMAU U NEED TO SEND ME THE TWO LINES U HAVE SOON!!1!!1!1 STOP I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS BUT IT HAPPENS TO ME SO OFTEN ITS AWFUL

ok THE CHEM TEACHER??? wow okay so thats crazy! HIS WIFE DIVORCING HIM TOO PLEASE SO DESERVED everyone point and laugh!!! L man!!!!

HELP WHY WERE THEY EVEN FIGHTING IF IT WAS JUST A NORMAL PICTURE THATS SO WILD?? 😭 like guys its not that deep </3

WHAT. so like is this hyperbole or is literally everyone going to leave bc of being underpaid and whatnot CAUSE THATS SO BAD 

senility✊😞 what a trooper/j

ITS OKAY I ENJOYED READING ALL OF THAT!!!  PLEASE PRIORITIZE ALL YOUR STUDIES THEYRE THE MOST IMPORTANT <3 I HOPE YOU DONT BURN OUT FROM BEING MORE BUSY THAN BEFORE BC I KNOW I DEFINITELY DID WHEN I HAD VOLLEYBALL.. SO TAKE THINGS EASY AND DONT STRESS YOURSELF TOO MUCH PLEASE!!! ILY ILY ILY!! oh okay so us without me pt 2 is probably gonna be BAD BAD cause it will b talking about how he was actually in love w eden since BEFORE he had moved and all that so itll be extra angst talking about before he had moved 😸 basically timeskips briefly showing how he gives you less and less affection as the time he leaves draws near AHAHAH ITS GONNA BE BAD

+ im alright!!! no homework for once in a blue moon so im sitting here relaxing i feel so good rn <3 i have an iced matcha latte and a cake pop I AM LIVE LAUGH LOVING

so i dont have much to yap about at this moment but i just got back from school SOOOO ill yap about that!!

starting off strong i woke up an hour + 15 mins late and had 20 minutes to get ready and eat... i was almost late this morning BUT i have fitness first thing in the morning on my a-days (we work on an a/b schedule!!) and my teacher always comes late to that!! so i had time to dress down and i BOOKED IT to the weight room + made it!! in that class we basically just do weightlifting + my usual partner wasnt there bc she had a golf tournament... so i was with some of my other friends for lifting!! was kinda thriving bc my other partner usually does heavier weights + they did lighter ones SO I WAS REALLY REALLY FAST W MY SETS i was very proud!!

then i went into second period (i have bio) and we were doing a lab where we examined some cells in onions, tomatoes, + the inside of our cheeks (ew) but basically we had to group up and im not rly fond of one of the girls that r in my group cause she doesn't talk much she just squeezes in to look through the microscope so it annoys me 😞 ANYWAY THE LAB WAS LIGHT WORK GOT IT DONE IN 30 MINS and then i had like an hour of free time after that so i asked for a hall pass and i roamed the halls for a bit 😸 after that i have to go to advisory + i was just helping people w math hw and doing some of the nyt games to kill my boredom (oh and drivers ed stuff!!)

at lunch i was just sitting with some of my friends and playing imessage games with them 😭 then we went into the gym and played volleyball for a bit!!

after lunch i had geo and i was taking notes like a madman i fear... dk if ive said this before but like ohhh man everyone makes a point of telling me how small my hand writing is its so annoying 😭 i heard that three times during class today and i was literally done LIKE STOP LEAVE ME ALONE PLEASE ‼️

theeeen i had my speech + debate CLASS not to be confused with my club!! i already finished my oratory so i just played games the entire period 😻 lots of fun would recommend!!! i just hate the teacher cause he's always telling me to go back to my seat WHEN IM HELPING HIS STUDENTS CATCH UP ON WORK like ok! sorry for trying to help you fix the mistakes you made when teaching them how to make their speeches! goodness! my bad! anyway hes my opp 😒

AND THATS MY DAY!! anyway take care stay safe i love you!!! MWAHH <3

[crazylittlejester]

Hey its been a while sorry schools Been kicking my ass man 😭

It also doesn't help that I'm hyperfixating on a new show RN 😭😭 (side note the show is undead unluck its rally good once you get past like the first 3 episodes there's also the manga for it its a rally good show 10/10)

though kinds crazy bc I was showing one of my friends characters from the show and she started calling one of them hot 😕)

Anyways rlly sorry if this is awkward I rlly forgot how to talk to ppl 😭

Just wanted to say that I'm still alive ig have a good day

(That one time-master sword anon)

glad to know you’re still alive dude alskdsl 😭 i do genuinely wonder how all my anons are doing when they disappear off for a bit because i cant crawl into YOUR askbox and bother ya to see how yall are doing alskdk

its cool you found a new show!! and i hope school starts treating you better dude. make sure to take care of yourself and get some water and good rest :)