#i have drs and surgeons in my family and while i am gonna have to kick the snot out of my younger brother for some shit im seeing budding

[bigmammallama5]

mammallama if you have energy how did you find your adhd dr? I know I could use one but I'm trying to fight the inertia of getting a dr because of all the experiences of previous medical professionals not listening to me. thank you for reading!

Hey, I've got a little energy! You get my one level seven spell slot for the day lol

I am very fortunate that I have a primary care doctor that takes my concerns seriously and pointed me in the direction of my current specialist. I also have two very wonderful best friends with ADHD who gently slid my wig back and told me "go get tested, you sound like me". I recognize not everyone is lucky to have doctors that listen to them so this answer will be based off of my limited experience and local healthcare in my state in America, so please keep these as general suggestions! And I know it's hard to advocate for your own health, trust me I get it lol, but please stick with it. It's worth it to get the answers at the very least so you can start adjusting.

So if you have a PCP try asking them for places that are in your insurance network that could help you get tested/write you a referral letter if needed. I would suggest first looking for a behavioral therapist that specializes in diagnosing ADHD (like mine does) and treatment. I can't get actual cognitive behavioral therapy from them but they help me keep track of my ADHD and navigate my medication stuff. The extra special thing about my doctor is she was also diagnosed as an adult, so she truly understands to a certain degree of what I'm dealing with. Looking at her during my first visit was like looking into the future of the person I can be with the right help. Having a doctor that has what you have is incredibly valuable.

If you can't find a specialist, I would suggest looking for a psychiatrist that specializes in diagnosing and treating ADHD. You can also get diagnosed by a psychologist but I don't think they can actually prescribe medications? But either of those professionals will be able to test and diagnose you!

If you have trouble networking, my therapist suggested looking on Facebook (I know I know) for local/state groups that can help you connect with doctors in your area. You'd be surprised at how ready people are to help others find the care providers they need! You may not even have to ask, there may be a list of medical professionals that you can look over.

I will warn you that depending on where you go it's going to probably cost a fair amount. Even with my therapist's office taking my insurance my testing was still over 400 bucks, but in the end it was worth it for me. I will also warn you that some testing can be quite lengthy from what I hear, taking multiple sessions depending on the professional you're seeing. My testing and diagnoses took a little less than three hours and that's why I'd suggest looking for an ADHD behavioral therapist first. They know exactly what they're looking for and know you're there specifically for that test.

Another tip I can give you is frame your reason for testing as simply needing answers to improve your quality of life. Have that in writing. Don't even mention medication other than "I would explore that if you deem it a viable option for treatment." Getting medication right now is difficult if not downright impossible for some of us, so I would frame your needs on getting yourself picked up and put together. That's really what you need first anyways. Answers.

Be warned ADHD may also come with a side of fries (other general disabilities like OCD/OCD tendencies, anxiety, depression, ect ect that are often the result of untreated ADHD).

ADHD is legally considered a developmental disability and protected under the Americans with Disabilities Act. Know your rights!

In the meantime I always suggest taking a look through https://www.additudemag.com/ for information about symptoms and research and all that stuff. This is a trusted source that my therapist's office shares with all of their patients! The articles are kept up to date as new research is made available and is laid out in such a way that it's easy for people with ADHD to read and navigate. It's also a great source for parents that have kiddos with ADHD, so pass that around if you know someone who's struggling!

I do hope that your past experiences with poor doctors won't keep you from seeking testing. I can promise you not all of them are like that, and I hope you can find someone who will listen to you and take your concerns seriously!

[castiel-barnes]

A Call

Request by: @yourstrulylightstar283

Pairing: Marcus Moreno x Trauma surgeon! Reader

Summary: After waking up, Marcus is met by the face of his saviour.

Word count: 510

Warnings: mentions of blood, hospital, inaccurate medical knowledge.

Tags: @phoenixhalliwell @scribbledghost @farfromjustordinary @ginger-swag-rapunzel

A/N: it's been quite a while since I've written anything so please bare with me.

Image not mine

The sterile walls of the ICU room blinded Marcus as he opened his eyes, his head thumping like someone was operating a jack hammer inside. For a moment he closed his eyes again, a grown emanating from his chest.

Footsteps filled his ears and as he opened his eyes again. He saw you. A doctor with a badge who was coming over to him.

"Ah Mr Moreno... You're finally awake." You spoke to him in a soft voice,

He wanted to reply but found he couldn't, a tube was in his mouth. Why? What happened? His mind was blank. And you could obviously see the confusion. Checking his oxygen levels you turned back to him.

"let's get that tube out aye... It's gonna be uncomfortable but you'll be alright."

Gently pulling the tube out, you placed a sick bowl next to Marcus and a some water. After a few moment of coughing up phlegm and soothing his sore throat he managed to talk.

"Where am I?" He croaked,

"Barlow Respiratory Hospital in Los Angeles. I'm Dr Y/n Y/L/n I was your surgeon. You're alright now, recovering slowly but you are recovering." You spoke softly, aware that everything might be a shock.

"I don't even remember how I got here... Or what happened. Or... Or.."

"hey Marcus... It's alright... You don't have to worry about remembering everything right now... You went through a lot of trauma. And you were a mess. No offence." You comforted him and pulled up a chair next to his bed.

His broken leg and arm elevated with soft pillows, tubes in his chest, drips in his good arm. Everything stuck to him. His head was absolutely swimming... Probably to the drugs you had put in him to keep him comfortable during his recovery.

"None taken... I... I remember you... Somewhat... You helped me on the battlefield didn't you?"

You nodded remembering how much chaos there was that day. Remembering how Marcus was just laying there almost motionless.

"I'll let you get some rest. If you need me... Even just for some company just ring your buzzer and I'll be here." You responded getting off the chair,

"hey doc... Can you do me a favour?" Marcus asked looking as you go to leave,

"of course." You responded stopping in the doorway.

"Can you make a call please?" His voice was quiet and almost unsteady, one of a broken man.

"A call? What type of call?"

"One to my family, to my ma and my daughter... They'd be worried sick about me."

You smiled and nodded, walking back over to his bed and taking his hand softly.

"Of course I can... But they have been in." You point to the cards and get well balloons.

"Your little girl has been reading books to you whilst your ma has been kept up to date on injuries and surgeries. But I'll make sure they know you're awake."

"thank you... Thank you for saving my life."

Marcus forced a slightly pained smile, but it made your day. He was alive, he was awake and he was talking. You couldn't ask for any better results.

[eldritchmochi]

since shit continues to be wild, as evidenced by the oingo boingo voice WEIRD CANCER posts, heres.....

mochi, what the fuck is up with that?? (guts edition) 3.0

1.0 ; 2.0

i apparently have not seen enough specialists so i have an oncologist now. gotta catch 'em all and shit

tl;dr mystery mass did turn out to be technically cancerous. i do not remember the specific type off the top of my head yet but its a weird rare one, because of course it is. luckily its a kind that stays very localized, so it's not gonna pop up anywhere else in my body, and my surgeons did manage to remove all of it with good margins. i am now down the 3rd and 4th part of my duodenum and my gallbladder (which, fun fact, did have signs of chronic gallbladder disease, so i guess i didn't escape that family trend lmao). like all cancers, theres a chance it'll grow back, but if it does, it should be in roughly the same place and is unlikely to be fatal, just annoying

i've got a fuck off big scar building down the centerline of my abdomen, from sternum to groin. it is gnarly as fuck and i am excited to see how it heals. i already have some ideas on how to incorporate it into my tattoos. you can see pictures of it here if you're a morbid freak like me. be sure to look at my reblogs for updates, there will probably be several contained there down the line, for posterity :>

the first like 18hrs post surgery were uh. not fun since it took A WHILE to find some sort of non oral pain management that would actually work for me, so thats great, but sans ng tube, i'm getting by pretty okay with ibuprofen and tylenol with the occasional non-standard opioid. i've been home since tuesday, oct 10th; had a check in with a gp yesterday, oct 13th, and i'm healing well. staples will be removed on the 18th and theoretically i'll be able to keep them >:3c

i'm back to eating semi-normally. still on bowel rest, but it's not as strict as it was before and it's mostly because i am paranoid vs anything required by my doctors. i haven't been nauseous since i went under on oct 4th which is absolutely wild, and i've been experiencing hunger at normal, regular intervals including being able to eat breakfast shortly after i wake up, which i haven't been able to do without a high chance of barfing it back up immediately since i was a teenager

first oncology appt is on oct 23rd. sounds like itll be mostly setting up a plan and schedule for things like regular scans to watch for regrowth and possibly referrals for genetic testing

my pfml back pay came innnnn god only last week holy shit, and my wife got their big chunk of school loans for living expenses so we are mostly fine there. i am arranging with a local queer to come a couple times a week to help with regular chores and stuff at 40 bucks a pop. if anyone would like to sponsor one of those visits or some take out for us, i'm @/sumomomochi on both pp and vnm0

at this point the sort of stuff that would serve us best is GEEFTS. not like, physical things you pay money for necessarily, though if you're a custom dice maker and wanna send us clacky math rocks, i would not say no. things like comments on our fics (mochi's ao3 ; cherry's ao3) or fanart for em, should you be so inclined, would be incredible. cherry is very low key on the internet but i'm chronically online, so other stuff like asks about worldbuilding or fic process or fashion opinions or whatever would be fantastic for me. i am...... incredibly bored after sitting in the same spot for four months now, and i've got another 4-5 weeks of it (:

but! i have a good support system, personally, professionally, and medically, so i'll be alright in the end, just hmm. sure has been a fucking year jesus christ

[living-d3ad-gh0ul]

Friday 19th January 2024, 00:47

Hey E. I hope you’re starting to recover a bit more and you’re starting to feel a bit better. I’m so so sorry it’s taken me a little while to respond to your last message properly, I had been worrying about how long it’d taken me to reply to you. I’ll be honest, after New Year I haven’t been feeling too great mentally. I’m not sure why or if it’s just a combination of things, but I’ve really isolated myself from a lot of people and things. I don’t know, I just think that I’m starting to really think about the direction in which I want my life to go and how it’s nowhere near where I want to be and it’s kind of scary. But we can talk about me more in a minute, I want to focus on you right now. 

Having to spend a week in hospital sounds so so draining and I’m sorry that you had to end up staying longer than anticipated. I am however glad that your surgery itself didn’t take too long, four hours is pretty good for something like you had done, so you must have had good surgeons, which I’m also glad about. I kind of squirmed a bit when you mentioned they had to move your lung and stuff, cause honestly I really cannot imagine how that would feel. Really weird I assume, but I guess you were asleep for it, so you probably don’t remember it. But still, it’d feel so strange. It doesn’t sound nice that you were in lots of pain afterwards too, but I’m glad that they could give you something for it to help and stuff. The drain thing sounds so weird too, like I really could not imagine having something like that done, but I can’t imagine it’s pleasant. I’m glad that they managed to be able to take it out after a few days though and that your lung started doing its thing again, good lung haha. Not being able to eat sounds awful too, but Dr Pain (I’ve decided that’s her name now) was good for giving you some tablets that would make things easier for you and enable you to eat. I have been wondering what was the first thing you had after you figured you could eat properly again haha. Is that weird? I don’t know, I just know if that had been me, I’d immediately be thinking of like my favourite food or something and asking someone to bring it for me. I really hope you had family or a friend or something to bring you things and visit you and stuff, cause I don’t want to think about you being in hospital all alone and stuff. It’s a pretty scary place sometimes, I remember when I was in hospital once before, I hated it. I was always asking when people were gonna come visit and stuff and I remember getting a little upset some nights because I was there on my own. I really didn’t like it. So I hope you did have people to come see you and stuff. 

God I can imagine JUST how stir crazy you were going. Especially having roommates that snore or are loud haha. I get maybe they couldn’t help it, but it can still affect you too since you’re sharing a room with them. I’m just really happy that you didn’t have to stay for much longer after the drain and everything was all sorted out and removed and stuff. I bet the stitches and stuff are all gone now? I know you’ll probably still have a faint scar from it and stuff, but hopefully those are healing up okay and there’s no issues with those. I really hope you’re not feeling as stiff as you were before and that you’ve got some more of your movement back. I know you were saying you had some of it but not all, so I hope that’s different now and it’s almost all back, if not completely by now. I hope this surgery really has helped too and you’re not in any more pain or being bothered by the issue that was happening before. Awwwww I bet poor Chonky did miss you, I don’t blame her for not leaving you alone haha. I’d have been the same probably, you’d have got so annoyed with me being there like “are you okay? Do you need anything? A drink? A snack? Another pillow? Need me to open a window? Get you a fan? Anything?” lol I’m making myself laugh as I type this because that’s literally exactly how I fucking am, I’ve been doing it with my gran when I see her and stuff and she just laughs at me and tells me to sit down and if she needs anything I’ll get it for her. My dad would do the same lol. I don’t know, I guess I just like looking after people and making sure they’re okay and don’t need anything at all. 

Ugh I’m not even going to lie to you, I would KILL for 30-35c weather right now. Maybe not 40, you can keep that lol. 20 would be perfect, that’s a good temperature for me. It’s currently -3 here and it’s snowing too, although it’s only JUST started a little bit ago. I’m absolutely frozen. At this very moment in time, I have my oodie on, my thick fluffy PJ’s and socks, a blanket and the heat turned up and I’m STILL freezing. But I am trying my best to get all warmed up and stuff. I really cannot wait for it to get a bit warmer outside, I miss being able to not wear a jacket and a scarf lol. I think I’M starting to get a bit of a cold right now, because I’m all sniffly. But I don’t have a cough or anything yet, maybe I won’t get one, I hope not cause I hate having a cough. Being asthmatic I kind of always have one anyway, so when I get a cold or anything that just gets so much worse and it’s very annoying lol. I really hope that you’re doing better now and it didn’t turn into anything else or get any worse at all. 

I have a tiny bit of good news actually. I’m moving departments in work. It’s technically actually a bit of a promotion haha. I’m moving into a specialist role, which means I’m moving team and manager and stuff too. It’s the same pay (I think, I’ve still to confirm that with my new manager once I find out who that is) but it’s better shifts and stuff for me. I’m a little excited about it, cause it means I’m not dealing with HALF as much shit as I was from customers lol. I won’t go into any detail or anything but there’s been quite a few times I’ve had customers be REALLY mean and horrible to me lol. But now I’ll be a specialist and I’ll only have to deal with things when they’re escalated to me now. I’ve served my time in the trenches is what I keep saying lol. 

Gran is doing okay. She’s still back and forth to the hospital and stuff for MRI’s and CT scans and all sorts of tests and things. She’s hopefully going to be getting surgery soon, to try and remove some of her pancreas and some other things nearby and around it. We’re hoping that this helps a lot and she can soon be on the road to recovery, since she can’t get any more chemotherapy. We found out that the type of chemo she was getting was a trial too, so that’s why it was a kind of “one and done” deal. Because she didn’t react well to it, they don’t want to attempt it again, just incase they make her sick again. I just really hope she gets her surgery really soon, cause the longer we leave it.. yeah, I don’t wanna say what I’m thinking but I think you’ll know what I mean. 

As for anything else? It’s just kind of all been the same. And that’s what I was saying earlier about it’s all a bit scary. I know where I want to be and what I want to do and stuff, it’s just… it seems really out of my reach with how things are at the moment and what I’m able to actually do if that makes sense. I don’t know, I think it’s because I’m approaching my last year of my 20’s now (I know, I sound so fucking old, UGH, but I’ll be bloody 29 in June and I really kinda don’t like it. I still feel like I’m 20 or something mentally). I don’t know.. I just feel like I haven’t really done much with my life up until now. Granted, yes, I’ve been through a lot (especially in the last year, good god) since I was a teenager (I don’t know if I’ve ever really told you any of what went on, or if I did I don’t think I went into detail, but the long and short of it is that I’ve not had an easy run of things since I was about 15, that’s when my life really changed a lot and I feel like I’ve just been dealt shitty hand after shitty hand since then) but I still feel like I should be a bit further on with my goals than I am now. Maybe I’m being hard on myself or something but.. I just don’t want to be stuck here forever you know? I do feel really stuck. I feel like there’s always some kind of roadblock or something in my way of getting to what I want. It’s like a two steps forward and three steps back kind of thing. I start to get somewhere then something happens or someone stops it. I really think my number 1 goal at the moment is to move out of the town I live in. There’s nothing here and no opportunities really, but it’s so hard to move at the moment because of how expensive everything is. So I’m not exactly in the best position to do so at the moment anyway, but I’m hoping to save some more and eventually be able to move to somewhere else. I really have to try and figure out where I wanna move to too. All I know is that I don’t want to live in Greenock forever. I’d be happy even just moving into the city, into Glasgow maybe. Although I might not wanna stay there forever. Who knows? It’s all a bit uncertain and stuff and I think it’s just because I’m getting a little older now I’m starting to think of all of this and freak out a little bit. 

It doesn’t help when I see my peers and friends and stuff all move away and have kids and get engaged and married and stuff and I’m just sat there trying to figure out what my next Baldurs Gate 3 tav will look like and what I’m gonna have for dinner that night and what I’m gonna wear to the next concert I go to or whatever lol. Which is soon btw, I’m going to see Depeche Mode (very 80s, very goth) on 31st January, which I’m super excited about. I’m also planning on booking 2 full day tattoo sessions down in Manchester as a birthday present to myself in June, the artist I’ll be booking in with is a friend of mine and I really love her artwork. I think I’m going to get her to do some Stranger Things and Baldurs Gate tattoos for me, since those are my two big obsessions right now haha. And I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving them or will ever regret those tattoos. Those are two things that I’ve really connected with and really enjoy, so it makes sense. It’s part of my story, so tattoos it is! Plus I kinda really just love getting tattooed? lol

I really do hope you’re doing much better and that you’re healing more and more every day. I hope Chonky is looking after you well and you are repaying her sufficiently in pats and treats. 

I really do look forward to hearing from you again soon. I don’t know if I’ve said it before but.. I really do like going back and reading all of your ��letters” to me. They really do give me a little warm feeling and make me smile. I think I just like talking to you and I like how these are unfiltered, like we’re just talking to each other as we normally would if we were sat next to each other or on the phone or something. 

Anyway, I’m rambling now and I really wanna go turn the heat up a little more because my toes are like ice cubes right now. 

I hope you’re doing well and resting lots and taking good care of yourself, E. I really can’t wait to hear from you soon. 

N x

“I can’t go back, no I’ve gone too far, I miss the way that my eyes filled with stars” 

[daylight-dreams-world]

So I binge watched all 5 seasons of The Good Doctor in 10 days while recovering from tonsillectomy. Hooo boy it was a ride. I really love this show, sure it has some issues, but as a neurodivergent woman, I really really liked it. 🥰

I had seen first two seasons before, but watched them again. I love how Shaun and Lea's relationship progressed, how Shaun is always learning and evolving, how his relationships with his coworkers have blossomed. Oh and I loved almost all the medical stories. This is gonna be kind of like word vomit, sorry, but gotta get my thoughts out.

Season 1 is a classic, introduction to characters and the world, ending with Dr Glassman getting a really bad diagnosis, but Shaun pushing himself to find if it's the right one and saving him in the process. Also all the things with Lea. Hate Dr Melendez and Dr Andrews. Love Dr Kalu and Dr Browne. Shaun had a really bad childhood and it makes me so sad 😐 But also pretty relatable?

Season 2 intoduces Dr Lim, Dr Reznick, Dr Park and Dr Han. It's kind of heavier season? Dr Kalu has to leave, Dr Han is a fucking PRICK🙂 and I am glad Dr Andrews came to his fucking senses and protected Shaun. People are still questioning if Shaun should be working there during this season and it's.. sad.

Lea and Shaun become roommates, OMG they were roommates!!😳😳 I don't like Dr Reznick, she kinda reminds me of Haley from Stardew Valley. Dr Lim and Park are really nice. Melendez and Lim become a couple and it's SO CUTE! I love Claire's support for Shaun. ❤️ It was heartbreaking to find out about Dr Glassman's daughter though 😭

Season 3.. it's really good. Might be my favourite season so far? We see Shaun pursuing a relationship with Carly, getting closer and more comfortable with eachother. Eventually they break up and Shaun tries to tell Lea how he loves her, but she has insecurities and doesnt want a relationship. Shaun struggles with losing both Carly and Lea 🥺 Claire struggles a lot this season, Im glad that Lim and Melendez are helping. Reznick being diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis is very fucking sad. She is SO driven to be a surgeon, but she probably has to give it up.

But my favourite part was probably the two-parter season finale. THE ENDING DESTROYED ME 😭😭😭😭😭😭 Melendez dying came out of NOWHERE, I was so hoping for a magical last minute cure which never came... I really loved Melendez this season and how he helped Claire. Also this taught me how you should never ignore "small" injuries, it's not worth to die for. They could've had the romance of the century 😭❤️

I am really glad the ending helped Lea realize how much she loves Shaun. Also Dr Park with that boy stuck under a bar that fell during the earthquake, slowly dying.. LET'S JUST SAY THERE WERE A LOT OF TEARS THIS SEASON 🥲🥲🥲

Season 4 starts with coronavirus two-parter opening. It's super sad and I am actually kinda surprised, that only Dr Lim ended up with PTSD. This season introduces us to new residents that Reznick, Park, Shaun, Claire, Lim and Andrews have to teach. Loved Olivia, but I was sure she was gonna quit. The other guy didn't really resonate with me, but it made me sad how they kinda made fun of polyamory. Dr Allen.. she's nice, but I don't really like overly religious people. Dr Asher Wolke, however, is my FAVOURITE?! after Shaun and Claire and Melendez? His story really resonated with me, him leaving his family and religion to be himself. Oh and it was so sad when he lost his freaking FIRST PATIENT?? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 Him continueing CPR even though he knew it was futale.... Made me cry so hard.

Dr Reznick giving up surgery was really sad, I felt for her so much.

Meanwhile, Lea and Shaun's relationship is blossoming and turns out Lea is pregnant! I'm glad they showed us the option to abort. I kinda spoiled myself though 💀 Was scrolling through episodes list and saw about grief and well, that happened, they lost the baby. I don't EVER want kids myself, but they portrayed the loss very well and I felt a lot of empathy for both Lea and Shaun.

I really loved the season finale two-parter in Guatemala. To see how life is there, how privileged I am to have FREE healthcare. I knew Lim and that guy were going to get together, but I didn't really like it. I really liked how Lea at first refused to hold that woman's baby but then did and also helped all night. I think that really helped her deal with grief. Park and Reznick getting together was.. surprising but I like it? CLAIRE LEAVING WAS SAD :( We lost Melendez last season and well, at least Claire didn't DIE, but it was sad to see her go, especially since she is Shaun's best friend. Lea proposing was very surprising but nice!!

Season 5, final season for now, I didn't actually like THAT much? Maybe like 2nd best from the bottom. I hated, that The BITCH Salen posed as a PATIENT with ADHD and then turned out to be buyer of the hospital. I hated her guts, so much. Also hated Reznick and Andrews for a while, but at least they made up for their mistakes. First half of the season was just stressing me the hell out. Also Lea and Shaun fighting 😐 and having trouble deciding on the wedding. The Shaun Show and The Lea Show were very nice episodes ❤️ I am glad they finally married in the final episode, they teased us so much!

AND I AM FREAKING OUT ABOUT DR LIM AND THAT NURSE, GUYS PLS DON'T BE DEAD, YOU CAN'T DO THAT TO ME AFTER MELENDEZ WHICH I AM STILL NOT OVER WITH!!

That was a lot, you're a hero if you read this far, thank you! ❤️ I can't wait for the next season to break and mend my heart even more🥰❤️

[seaside-writings]

(Part 2 of 3)

In celebration of the new year, I've made this prompt list made up of all my favorite prompts I've posted over 2021! I hope you all enjoy this list, and I hope it brings you some inspiration!

I'll see you all in 2022!

I hope you all stay blessed and safe throughout your day. Lots of Love & Wishes: Celia 💙

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3)

Prompts:

Prompt #147: “No, Little One, this is not the end of the story; it is only the beginning,” - Prompt #148: “Why do you have so many plants?” “They needed a home,” - Prompt #152: “I need you to stitch me up!” “I’m a quilter, not a surgeon!!” - Prompt #153: “You know, he only has a soft spot for you,” - Prompt #156: “I can tell you’re falling asleep,” “No, I’m not!” “Oh please, I can tell how heavy your eyelids are even though I’m facing away from you,” - Prompt #158: “I’m scared and I need you!!” - Prompt #159: “Do you want anything? Water? Dr. Pepper? Coffee? A hug?” - Prompt #162: “You’re overreacting,” “No, I am not! I don’t need you! I have people that love me! I have people that want me! I have people that won’t ever leave me! Unlike you,”

- Prompt #165: “I beg your pardon!” “You can beg all you want, but it doesn’t mean you’re gonna get it,” - Prompt #168: “Why didn’t you wake me up?” “You needed the sleep,” - Prompt #170: “I thought you forgot about me,” “How could I ever forget someone like you?” - Prompt #172: “Nice work, Kid,” “Well, I learned from the best,” - Prompt #174: “Don’t you ever come near my family again,’ - Prompt #175: “You’re not dead!” “I’m offended that you think I can die,” - Prompt #176: “I can help,” “I know and that’s why you’re staying with me,” - Prompt #178: “Am I going insane?” “No, I just think you’re finally seeing the truth,” - Prompt #182: “Stay close to me while I get us a ride home,” - Prompt #183: “I swear you make me want to scream,” “In what way?” “… Get out!” - Prompt #186: “Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay, just listen to my heartbeat,” - Prompt #191: “Why is there so much blood?” “…” “Why is there so much blood!?” - Prompt #192: “You’re an odd one that’s for sure, but that’s what makes you wonderful,” - Prompt #197 “What gives you the right to leave me!?!” “Because you left me first!!!” - Prompt #198: “Do you love me?” “I’d destroy the world for you,” - Prompt #199: “Let go, and I’ll catch you!!” “You’re lying!” “I’m not! I promise, just let go, and I will catch you,” - Prompt #200: “I missed you so much!!” “I missed you too, half-pint,” - Prompt #201: “You’re acting like a child,” “Oh, yes! I’m the one acting like a child even though you’re the one saying hateful things to me! I have a right to be angry when you act like a dick!” - Prompt #203: “You're making a mistake!” “My only mistake was ever believing that you had changed,” - Prompt #208: “Are you hurt? Did they hurt you? Where are you hurt? Do we need a healer? Answer me!” “It’s kind of hard to answer you when you won’t let me speak and when your smothering my face in kisses while hugging the air from my lungs,” - Prompt #211: “I gave you everything!!” “The only thing you gave us was suffering and pain!” - Prompt #213: “I own you!!!” “You own nothing,” - Prompt #214: “I already have a family,” - Prompt #215: “Everyone sit down and shut up!” “… “ “Let’s listen to the kid for once,” - Prompt #216: “Why are you using a broken wine bottle as a weapon!?!” “I think the better question is, why aren’t you using a broken wine bottle as a weapon??” - Prompt #221: “What is it?” “Magic,” - Prompt #222: “Has anyone seen my sword?” “Did you check the kitchen?” - Prompt #223: “You’re feet are freezing!” “You let me into your bed; you have to deal with it,” - Prompt #225: “You always were the runt of the litter,” - Prompt #228: “What… What are these?” “Fireflies! I thought you’d like them,” - Prompt #229: “What the fuck is that?” “It’s my media-induced, paranoid nightmare,” - Prompt #230: “If you touch any of them, I will cut your heart out.” - Prompt #231: “Fuck! Look at your leg!!” “It’s just a cut,” “A very big cut that’s currently gushing blood!” - Prompt #232: “Welcome back,” “Not feeling very welcomed,” - Prompt #234: “Well, if we’re gonna die, might as well die kicking ass,” - Prompt #235: “You have to let go, kiddo,” “No!” “Baby… “ “If I let go you’ll leave again!” - Prompt #237: “So, what’s the plan?” “Get the scepter, stop the big bad evil guy, save the world,”

[just-dreaming-marvel]

Love and Medicine ~ 7

MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 4,400ish

Summary: Clint has feelings. You try not to cause too much drama at work.

You immediately began avoiding Steve after Gamora caught you two in the car. You need not need her, or anyone else, thinking that you were sleeping with him to get ahead. Having no desire to get ready for work, you laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, as your alarm buzzed.

Outside in the hall, Clint was nervously walked towards your door with two cups of coffee.

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just ask her out?” Valkyrie suddenly asked, popping out of her room.

“Ah!” Clint jumped, slipping the coffees on him. “Val!”

“She’s right, ya know?” Scott added, stepping out of his room. “Just ask her out. It’s not like it will be awkward when she tells you no.”

“I hate you both,” Clint grumbled. He leaned into your door, able to hear to slam on the snooze button for the third time. “She’s gonna be late.”

“Maybe not.”

“We should wait for her.”

“Definitely not,” Val shook her head. “I’m not her mother, and you are not her boyfriend.”

“Not yet, anyway,” Scott added.

“Stop, both of you, okay?” Clint said, frustrated. “I told you I’m not interested.”

“Life is short, Clint,” Val said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Do you really want to die before you ever ask her out?”

“I do not want to ask her out.”

“Do you really want to die a liar?” Scott said.

“I’m not… I’m not dying.”

~~~

From the parking garage, you rushed towards the building. Late for work. As you wait for the elevator, you see Steve coming toward you.

“Crap,” you mutter.

“Crap?” Steve repeated, having heard you.

“Hi. I’m late.”

“Hi, late. You’re avoiding me.”

“You’re right. But I can’t do this right now. I’m late.” You hurried towards the stairs, only for him to follow you.

“Okay, but are we going to talk about this?”

“No.” You marched up the stairs.

“About us and Gamora and what she saw?”

“I don’t need to talk about it. I experienced it. Naked.”

“This is getting complicated.”

“Complicated for me. Not necessarily for you. I’m the intern sleeping with the attending. Gamora isn’t even speaking to me anymore!”

“Not that, that’s a bad thing. If I was a better guy, I’d walk away.”

“Yes, you would.”

“Do you want me to be a better guy.”

“Yes. Now,” you reached the level of the locker rooms, “I’m late. Please leave me alone and get to my job.” You opened the door. Steve caught it, keeping it open as you walked away.

“Take your time! Think about it!”

“Think about what?” Tony asked, walking over to Steve. He looked to where Steve was looking, watching her rush down the all. “Ooohhh… I get it now. Well, at least she’s talking to you.”

“The date go bad with Pepper?” 

“It didn’t go at all. I was pulled into a surgery and completely forgot about it.”

“Yikes.”

“I think I’ve blown it.”

“Me too, Stark. Me too.”

~~~

“That was definitely worth being late,” Natasha sighed as she put on her pants.

“Thanks,” Bruce smiled shyly, doing the same. “Is this a… should we talk about this?”

“Yeah,” Natasha slipped her shirt on, “definitely. Just, I’m late.”

She rushed out of the on-call room and straight to the locker room, where you were getting ready.

“You’re late,” you stated.

“So are you,” Natasha responded.

“I know, and I can’t afford to piss off Gamora any more. Do you think she told anyone?”

“About you and Captain McDreamy?”

“Yeah.”

“No, he’s her boss too.”

“If they find out, what can they… Can they kick me out? Or—“

“No…. Well, I don’t think officially. You'll just get edged out, blacklisted, banned from his surgeries, passed over for chief resident. It’ll be humiliating, but you’ll live.”

“I have to end it. I definitely have to end it… I have to end it, right?”

“Y/N, shut up.” Nat headed out of the locker room.

“What?” You chased after her. “Did you seriously just tell me to shut up?”

“Oh, please. You got a hot doctor who like to make you open up, and say "ahh." It's the American dream, stop whining about it.”

“No. No good can come from sleeping with your boss.” You two arrived in front of Gamora.

“Natasha, you’re late,” Gamora stated, unhappy.

“So is Y/N,” Natasha replied, pointing at you.

“When we walk in this door, you will maintain decorum,” Gamora continued, ignoring Nat and you. “You will not laugh, vomit, or drop your jaw. Are we understood?” She walked to a door.

“Why would we laugh?” Val asked quietly.

“Oh, just you wait,” Peter replied.

The interns followed Gamora into a patient room. On the bed, there was a heavier woman with an extremely large tumor bulging out fo her side.

“Good morning, Miss Anderson,” Gamora greeted.

“Good Morning,” Miss Anderson, the patient, replied.

“What is it?” Scott whispered.

“Tumor,” Nat responded.

“Good morning, Millie,” Peter smiled, walking around to the other side of the patient’s bed. “How are you? This is Dr. Gamora and some of my fellow interns.”

“Dr. Quill, we refer to patients as ‘mister’ and—“ Gamora began to reprimand.

“I old him to call me Millie,” the patient interrupted. “Miss Anderson makes me feel old and fat, which I am, but why have to feel that way?”

“Good morning,” Dr. Banner greeted upon entering, eyes lingering on Natasha a beat too long.

“Millie, this is Dr. Banner,” Peter stated. 

“Dr. Quill, give us the run down.”

“Millie Anderson is a 43-year-old woman who presented last night with progressive shortness of breath fo the past three months. Found to have a very large tumor of unknown origin pressed against her diaphragm. Stable vital signs. Scheduled for CT this morning, sir.”

“Thank you, Dr. Quill.” Banner turned to Millie. “Are you at all claustrophobic?”

“I’ve been housebound for the last year,” Millie replied. “How claustrophobic could I be?”

“Alright then. Dr. Valkyrie is going to take you up for a CT. It’ll give us a better look at the tumor, and we’ll know how to proceed.”

“Could someone tell my dad? He’ll worry if he gets back and I’m not here.”

“Yeah, of course.”

“And would it be possible for Peter to take me instead? I mean, he… he’s just so fun to look at.”

“Millie,” Peter laughed, clearly trying to gain favor.

“Sure,” Banner said. “Sure, Miss Anderson. Excuse me.”

Dr. Banner left the room, with Dr. Gamora and the interns following.

“How much do you think it weighs?” Scott asked.

“60 pounds,” Clint answered.

“More,” Val said. “She’s carrying a whole extra person.”

“This one’s going in the books,” Natasha said. “I’ve got to get in.”

“I almost did,” Val glared at Peter.

“I was on call last night when she came in,” Peter said. “I’m never leaving this place again.”

“Let’s move, people,” Gamora said. “Miss Anderson’ surgery, should we choose to proceed, will take most, if not all, of the surgeons off the floor. Which means you people will have to work extra hard not to kill anyone, cause we won’t be there to fix your mistakes.”

You and the others listened to Gamora’s orders while Natasha slipped away to talk to Bruce.

“I really want in on this,” she whispered to him.

“I thought we weren’t talking,” Bruce replied, eyebrow up.

“I’m not talking. I’m just saying.”

Bruce sighed. “Find her father, get a family history, and I’ll tell Gamora.”

~~~

“I know you both think I like Y/N,” Clint stated as him, Scott, and Val walked up the stairs. “But I don’t like Y/N.”

“What?” Val questioned.

“No. I like Y/N. Obviously, I like her. She’s my roommate. I just… I don’t have a thing for her.” Scott and Val shared a look.

“Okay,” Scott said.

“It’s just this morning… I know you two were probably just teasing. But I don’t want you to say anything like that to her. Because, you know, we live together and that’d be awkward.”

“Clint, stop talking,” Val ordered.

“Okay, then… It’s just—“

“Seriously, dude,” Scott stopped in front of Clint. “You’re making this all worse. Just stop.” Scott peered behind Clint where you were making your way towards them. “Or you could just be honest with yourself and us and ask her out now.” Clint looked back to see you almost there.

“What are you guys standing here for?” You asked. “We’re going to be late meeting Gamora.” 

You and Val continued on your way with Scott watching Clint watch you.

“Liar,” Scott muttered, shaking his head.

The two guys caught up with you and Val. The four of you met up with Gamora in another patient room. Inside the room, a man is trying to walk but was having difficulty. Steve was also in there and a younger woman.

“Morning,” Gamora greeted.

“Mr. Jones, this is Dr. Gamora and her fine staff of surgical interns,” Steve introduced. Steve, yourself, and Gamora all exchanged glances.

“Welcome to hell, kids,” Mr. Jones stated.

“Who’s presenting?” Gamora asked.

“Edward Jones,” Clint stated, “is a 63-year-old man admitted for pain management for Dyskinesia. He's been stable since last night, and responding to the bolus injections.”

“Val, possible treatments?”

“For Parkinson’s disease?” Val questioned. “Um, deep brain stimulation has shown—“

“Not for Parkinson’s,” Steve clarified, “for spinal pain.”

“Oh, um…”

“Instraspinal catheter,” you stated. “That way, he can have constant pain medication.”

“Excellent,” Steve smiled. “This is Dr. L/N. She’s gonna prep you for the procedure and assist.” His pager beeped, causing him to look down. “Excuse me.” He left.

“You make yourselves busy,” Gamora said, following Steve out. “I’ll catch up with you.”

She followed Steve to the elevator. Where they end up alone.

“Gamora,” Steve greeted.

“Excuse me?” She responded.

“Well, that’s your name, right? It’s on your jacket.” She wasn’t impressed. “Alright, fine. Dr. Gamora then.”

“You think you're charming in that talented, neurotic, overly moussed hair sort of way, good for you. But if you think I'm going to stand back and watch while you favor her—“

“I don’t favor her. She’s good.”

“I’m sure she is.”

“You know, can I point out that, technically, I'm your boss?”

“You don't scare me. Look, I'm not going to advertise your extracurricular activities with my intern. However, the next time I see you favoring Y/N L/N in any way, I'll make sure she doesn't see the inside of on OR for a month. Just for the sake of balance.” 

~~~

“Okay, Mr. Jones,” you said with a smile. “We're going to get you more comfortable, okay? I'm going to go downstairs and I'll be back up shortly.”

“Okay,” Mr. Jones responded.

“Okay.”

You left, with the younger woman from the room following you out.

“Excuse me,” the younger woman called out, causing you to turn your attention to her. “I’m sorry, doctor…”

“L/N,” you smiled.

“Dr. L/N. I’m Lucy, his daughter. My dad seems to like you. He’s always liked your type. Is that rude? I’m sorry. I’m so tired.”

“Is there something—“

“I was wondering if you would talk to him.”

“About?”

“Brain surgery. The doctor mentioned it, and I've read about it online. If it worked, it could help with most of his symptoms, not just his pain.”

“Is he a candidate? I don’t—“

“He is, but he's afraid of it. Surgery on his back, he can understand, but his brain...And there are risks. But his quality of life…”

“There isn’t any.”

“And, it keeps getting worse. I'm getting married next month. I already lost my mom. And I want him to walk...I want him with me. Maybe that's selfish, but...you don't know what it's like having a parent...Watching him…”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thanks.”

You immediately left in search of Steve. You watched outside a room where he was talking to Gamora and Banner about Miss Anderson.

“Dr. Rogers,” you called as he walked out. “Mr. Jones, the Parkinson's patient, is he a good candidate for DBS?”

“Yes,” he replied, “but he’s not interested.”

“Okay, but I think it's worth talking to him again, pushing him.”

“We're talking about a brain surgery that is performed while the patient is wide awake, a risk of paralysis, a risk of death. And, the patient doesn't want it. It is not my job to push him into anything and it's definitely not yours.”

“Okay.”

“And since you’re clearly uncomfortable with my decision in this case, it's probably best you don't scrub in.”

“But—“

“It’s a minor procedure. You won’t be missed.” This took you by surprise. “I’m good here, Dr. L/N.” With your mind reeling, you walked away. Steve turned to Gamora, who had been watching. “You know that you’re a bully, right?”

“So I’ve heard,” Gamora replied.

~~~

You and Val were sitting in a corner of the cafeteria, eating lunch.

“It's just that he blatantly favors me in front of her and then blatantly dismisses me,” you complained to her.

“How do you know he was favoring you?” She asked, which you didn’t answer. “Look, you've got a brain. You got into this program. Just because Rogers wants to munch your cookies doesn't mean you didn't deserve what you worked for.”

“But he’s making me look bad. I have to end it.”

“Right.”

“It’s over.”

“Sure.”

“Is it true you get to scrub in on that tumor?” Peter asked Natasha, appearing out of nowhere with Val. They both sat down at your table.

“Don’t sit here.”

“You get to scrub in?” Val repeated. “How psyched are you?”

“On a scale of one to ecstatic, ecstatic.”

“It’s unbelievable,” Peter complained. “You know what I think? I think Banner wants to get into your scrubs.”

“Why are you sitting here?”

“He kicked me off that surgery for the same crap most of you pull every day.”

“You know what.” Natasha held up her fork. “If I stuck this fork into his thigh, would I get in trouble?”

“Not if you make it look like an accident,” you answered.

“Hey!” Clint greeted, coming up with Scott.

“Thank goodness,” Peter exclaimed. “I’m drowning in estrogen here.”

Clint sat down next to you, studying you. “You look… is everything okay?” He asked you.

“Rogers is a jackass,” you muttered.

“Really?” Val questioned. “I think he’s kind of great.”

“He reamed her out in front of Gamora,” Natasha said.

“Why?”

“Cause he’s a jackass,” you repeated.

“Well, bad days are… bad,” Clint said. “Maybe tonight, uh, if, you know, if you drink alcohol, I mean… we could, all of us, I mean, go out and rink alcohol… because of the bad day.”

Your pager beeped. “I’ve got to go.” And you left.

“Dude,” Peter laughed at Clint once you were gone.

Clint groaned and rested his head on the table. Scott panted his shoulder while the others laughed.

~~~

Steve had called you to Mr. Jones room. You stood near the door, watching.

“How’s your back?” Steve asked Mr. Jones as he checked him over.

“Still good,” the patient responded.

“Good.” Steve turned to Mr. Jones daughter. “How are you? Good?” She nodded as he turned his attention back to her father. “Can you lean forward for me? I just want to check something. Does that feel okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Right here?” Steve pressed along Mr. Jones’ back. The man grunts slightly and Steve looked up, finally noticing you. “Mr. Jones,” Steve took his hands off the man, “have you given any more thought about the other surgical options we discussed this morning?”

“What? Why would I? I already told you no. I'm letting you cut into my back, but that's not enough for you. All you guys ever want to do is cut.”

“Dad,” his daughter scolded, “just listen to what he has to say.”

“I already listened.”

“Sir, there’s a very small window of opportunity here,” Steve stated. “You know, once the Parkinson's progresses to a point of dementia, there's, you know, you're no longer a candidate for DBS.”

“And when I'm no longer a candidate, is that when you people will leave me the hell alone! What? Do I have to start drooling, and forget my name to get a little peace and quiet?”

“Alright,” Steve nodded. “I’ll check back with you later. Try to get some rest.” Steve left while you lingered a bit longer, just more in the hallway.

“Dad, you’re being unreasonable,” the daughter said. “The doctors are only trying to help you.”

“It’s my damn life, and it’s my damn brain,” Mr. Jones stated. “You want me to let them cut up my brain while I'm lying there awake, for what?”

“Dad!”

“I'll be at your wedding. I will sit in the back. Your uncle will walk you down the aisle. I know it's not perfect, but it's life. Life is messy sometimes.”

“I know that.” The daughter walked out and Mr. Jones looked at you.

“If she knows, then what the hell are we still talking for, huh? Why in the hell can’t she drop it?”

“It is your life,” you said, stepping further into the room. “But it’s her life too. And you have a chance to get better here. And all she's asking you to do is try.”

~~~

Mr. Jones agreed to the DBS. But you needed to hurry and find Steve, before the man changed his mind. You found him scrubbing in for Miss Anderson’s surgery with Banner and Gamora.

“Dr. Rogers,” you called.

“Yes?” He responded, looking over with his red, white, and blue scrub cap on and a mask.

“Mr. Jones has agreed to DBS. Only if we do it today. If he leaves, he won’t come back.”

“Don’t worry, Steve,” Bruce said. “It’ll take hours before we get around to the spine. I’ll page you.”

“Alright, then,” Steve said, shaking off his wet hands. “Let’s do it.”

Steve walked out of the scrub room while Bruce walked into the OR, leaving you and Gamora alone.

“Dr. Gamora. I didn’t know… I din’t know that he was my boss, when I met him,” you said. “I really didn’t know.”

“I don’t care,” she responded.

“Really? Oh, well, you sort of seemed to not be talking to me, so I—“

“You see this, what's happening right here? This is the problem with you sleeping with my boss. Not whether or not you know him before, but how it affects my day. And me standing here talking to you about your sex life affects my day. And the longer this little fling goes on, the more favors you get over the others, who are fighting tooth and nail just to make it through this program without any assistance. When those people start finding out what's going on and they don't want to work with you and talk to you or look at you, and they start bitching and moaning at me, the more it affects my day. So, no, Dr. L/N, I don't care what you know, or when you know it. Are we understood?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

~~~

“Neuro sponge,” a male nurse said, handing a sponge to Steve.

“How you doing, Mr. Jones?” Steve asked.

“Alright,” Mr. Jones responded.

“Drill bit’s charged,” the nurse announced.

“Where’s the girl doctor?”

“I’m right here,” you responded, stepping closer. “Can’t you see me?”

“I’m shaky, not blind. Anything goes wrong here, I’m blaming you.”

“Okay, in that case, I'll stay where you can see me. Now we just have to drill a hole and try to find the spot that controls the motor function.”

“You can't see my brain from there. Aren't you supposed to be learning something?”

“I’m good,” you grabbed onto his hand, “right here.”

“EEG waves look good,” the nurse stated.

“Okay, Mr. Jones. Just take a couple of deep breaths,” Steve told him. “Focus on the pretty girl. Okay, this is going to sound really scary, but try and relax. You shouldn't feel a thing.”

Then Steve began to drill into Mr. Jones’ head. After a few hours, Steve asked you to have Mr. Jones try and mimic you.

“Just keep trying, Mr. Jones,” you encouraged. “Mimic my motions. You can do it.”

“Oh, damn it!” His body was too shaky to mimic the motions.

“Take a breath and try again. The probe is almost in. You’ll know when we find the right spot.” Mr. Jones tries again, to find that he stopped shaking and was able to mimic you. “Well, how about that?” You smiled, though it was covered with a mask.

“There it is,” Steve said.

~~~

After the surgery, you and Steve brought Mr. Jones back to his room and met back in the hallway.

“I know you’re probably asking yourself why I took you off the surgery,” Steve said. “Gamora was on the warpath. I was trying to protect you.”

“You trying to protect me is why she's on the warpath,” you replied, the both of you heading down the hall. “You can't do me favors. You can't ask me to scrub in when I haven't earned it.”

“Okay, okay.”

“And you can't treat me like crap when I haven't earned that either.”

“Okay.”

“I can take care of myself. I got myself into this mess, and I’ll—“

“And you'll get yourself out?”

“I don’t… I don’t know that yet.” Steve’s pager went off as you arrived at the staircase. “Don’t let me keep you.”

“You did great work here today.” He smiled at you then headed off.

“Dr. Rogers,” you called after him.

“Yeah?” He turned around to face you.

“Sorry I called you a jackass.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did. Twice.”

Steve chuckled and continued on his way. Tony had heard and seen the exchange from behind. He came up beside you.

“You both are love sick idiots,” he said.

“And you aren’t?” You responded. 

“Yes. But I blew it.”

“Dr. Potts will give you another chance.”

“How do you know? Did she tell you that?”

“No. I just know from experience.”

~~~

You decided to go to the OR gallery and watch Miss Anderson’s surgery. Peter was up there watching as well.

“Wow, it’s unbelievable,” you said, looking at the mess down below.

“Right,” Peter agreed.

“How did she live like that?”

“Watch what you say. You never know who's listening.” He looks down below, then laughed. “Look at Scottie. He looks like he's about to fall in.”

“Are you really as shallow and callous as you seem?”

“Oh, you want to go out for a drink later and hear about my secret pain?”

“Does that line ever work for you?”

“Sometimes.”

“Oh. Must be because you look like that.”

“Like what?” You laughed at him. “So is that a yes?”

“No. I can't. I’m… seeing someone.”

“Look, if you don't want to go out with me, just say so. No need to lie.”

“Oh, okay. Well, I don't want to go out with you. But I think I really might be seeing someone.”

Suddenly, Val entered the OR below. And you could hear everything that was happening.

“Mr. Collins, the post-op heart patient in 2114. I had to open his sternotomy bedside,” Val stated, almost panicked.

“You what?” / “What?” 

Peter quickly left the gallery and you stood up to watch from the glass.

“He had cardiac tamponade. His chest films were clean this morning,” Val explained. “It just... It happened fast. He was in PEA. There was no time.”

“Go ahead,” Steve told Bruce. “I got it. We’re okay here.”

“Okay.” Bruce hurried out with Val.

“I need some retraction. Pull back on the retractor. And someone page Hill to help… Never a dull moment here at the medical center.” A blood vessel burst, suddenly, squirting blood all over Steve and Gamora. “Oh!”

“Oh!” Gamora exclaimed.

“Get right in there!”

“She can’t afford to lose this much blood. We need more blood.”

“Get me some suction here. I can't see what I'm doing. Clamp, clamp, clamp, please. Is there any blood in the rapid infuser?”

“We’re waiting on two units,” the female nurse stated.

“What do you mean, waiting?”

“Well, we didn’t anticipate this much blood loss,” Gamora replied.

“They’re on their way,” the nurse said.

“We prepped a double supply. We’ve used it all.”

“What did you cut?” Steve asked.

“Nothing. It just blew. She came in with too much damage. The artery walls are too weak. Ten units of o-negative.”

“I cannot see. Lang, give me your hand. Push right down here. Pull it towards you. Suction! Suction!”

“The pressure’s dropping,” a nurse stated.

“She needs blood. Where the hell is the blood?! Somebody grab that. Push it back, Lang. Come on.” Everyone is breathless as they move Miss Anderson more onto the table. “Oh, God. Just squeeze it off right there. Here we go… Some suction, please, in here, now. Come on. We're losing her now. Look at this. Look at this. Come on!” He started CPR, with the flatline of the machine going. "Oh, come on! Come on!” He continued with the CPR. "Come on!” After a few more times, Steve breathlessly stopped CPR. “Time of death is 11:42.”

~~~

Natasha found her way to an on call room after Miss Anderson’s surgery. She was stretching when Bruce entered.

“I'm not doing you any more favors,” he stated. “This was it.”

Natasha scoffed. “I've been holding up 50 pounds of tumor for the past 12 hours. My back's going to need traction, and the patient died anyways. And you think you did me a favor?”

“Look, I'm just… What is this… that we're doing here? What is it?”

“You need a definition? You really want to be that guy?”

He watched as she continued to stretch, then he locked the door.

~~~

You waited in the parking garage for Steve to leave the hospital. He walked up to you.

“I, um, know this place where they’re an amazing view of the sunrise and ferryboats,” you told him, pulling out some beers from your bag.

“I have a thing for ferry boats,” he smirked.

“I remember.”

He took a hold of your hand, leading you to his car.

next chapter >

NOTES: from now on the taglist when be added by a reblog. I will reblog it using my second account, @just-dreaming-marvel-2​​​. Just so that my main page doesn’t get too cluttered.

If you want to be added to the tag list, please dm me or send in an ask.

[lostcoves]

ft. taishiro toyomitsu (fatgum) x gn!reader

genre: angst with a bittersweet ending 

wc & warnings: 1.7k | hospitals, blood, bus crash, alcohol, drunk!(y/n)

premise: your first day in university of tokyo hospital’s emergency room is surely a day to remember.

note: my contribution to @instantnuma​’s love hospital collab! i had a blast writing this piece as someone who comes from generations of medical personnel! hope you all enjoy!

university of tokyo hospital, home to some of the most renowned minds in the medical profession.

and somehow you ended up here as an intern in their emergency department.

why the emergency room of all places? couldn’t they have assigned you to pediatrics?! you loved kids! kids were cute! why did it have to be the emergency room?

you panicked easily, ironic for someone who just graduated medical school to pursue a career in medicine. at least, you weren’t a surgeon. you knew your limits.

you hovered by the nurse’s station, unsure what to do. you were supposed to meet your attending, dr. toyomitsu. yet, they were nowhere to be seen.

damnit, did my attending really flake on my first day? you thought to yourself, shuffling a bit by the nurse station.

BAM! the doors of the emergency room swung open, revealing a large blond handsome man performing cpr on the person attached to the stretcher. the paramedics wheeled the wounded in and the handsome man began shouting orders.

“kirishima, i need fifteen milligrams of morphine, stat! get me some wrap for this sucking chest wound, too!” the man commanded the room with an iron fist.

you couldn’t help but watch in all, as the handsome man treated the patient’s wound. a spiky redhead- you assumed to be kirishima- appeared behind you with morphine and wrap, securing the patient’s wound while nurses hooked the patient up to the machines.

“page the OR, amajiki. this man is gonna need major surgery,” the handsome man directed an indigo haired man. the other man- amajiki- got on the phone and informed the operating room of the patient.

you could only stand in awe, as the patient was whisked away into surgery. you slowly clapped at the heroism of the man before you, “sir, that was—”

“all in a day’s work,” he answered with a lopsided grin.

“your clothes, though..” you pointed out the man’s blood soaked shirt and pants. he shrugged it off and commented, “i’ll be changing into my scrubs anyway.”

“scrubs? you’re a doctor?” well, duh he was a doctor. why else would the medical personnel listen to him?

“yup! i’m doctor taishiro toyomitsu! but everyone calls me dr. fats!” he exclaimed, extending a hand to you.

your eyes widened at his name, “you- you’re my boss! i’m doctor (l/n), (y/n) (l/n). i just graduated form medical school.”

“ah! my new intern, great!” he was such a positive ball of energy. you just realized that he towered over you, now that he was off the stretcher. what a big fellow! he then added to you, “lemme introduce you to my residents. they’ll be here to help you out, as well.”

dr. toyomitsu gestured to the redhead and indigo haired duo from earlier, “this is doctor eijiro kirishima, second year resident, and doctor tamaki amajiki, fourth year resident.”

the redhead- kirishima- waved excitedly at you, “it’s good to meet you, dr. (l/n)! welcome to the team!”

the indigo haired man- amajiki- hung his head low, “uh huh.. good to have you on- on the team.”

“now that introductions are out of the way!” dr. toyomitsu grabbed a white coat off the coat rack, “let’s get to work, folks.”

─────────────────

you collapsed in the on call room, exhausted and sweaty from the past eleven hours of your first shift. suture after suture, panicky parent after panicky parent.. god, why did you make emergency medicine your second choice after pediatrics?

“hey,” dr. toyomitsu took a seat next to you in the on call room, “sucks that your first day was a twelve hour shift, huh?”

“i haven’t been this exhausted since last year’s finals,” you grumbled.

dr. toyomitsu laughed, “you’re funny.”

“i am?” you questioned.

“you are,” he paused, “what made you decide to choose emergency medicine as your speciality?”

“they ran out of openings for internships with pediatrics,” you replied honestly.

“okay so what made emergency medicine your second choice?” dr. toyomitsu reframed the question.

you pondered on it– you didn’t think you had a really good answer– so you decided to speak from the heart.

“emergency medicine is crucial for saving lives and i wanna save as many lives as possible,” you answered. dr. toyomistu sensed your sincerity and gave you a smile, “and i’m sure you will achieve just that but be aware.. sometimes you can’t save everyone.”

you opened your mouth to respond when dr. toyomistu’s pager went off. he checked the device and leapt to his feet, “bus crash. all hands on deck! you wanna save as many lives as possible? now it’s time for you to prove it.”

you sat up and ran after dr. toyomitsu into the emergency room, horrified by the scene before you. so many injured, some strapped to stretchers and others dragging themselves inside. 

“doctor! we got a red!” a paramedic hollered to you. you rushed over to the stretcher and yelled, “what do we got?!”

“female, age seven! possible internal bleeding and multiple fractures!” the second paramedic exclaimed. you stared down at the little girl and froze. she was so small, caked in blood and her dress in ruins. god, no. she was too young, too young and innocent.

“doctor, we need to act fast!” the first paramedic shouted.

“yes!” tears stained the little girl’s dress, “get me an iv and a cocktail of vitamin k, plasma, blood, and platelets! stat!”

a trio of nurses ran over with the supplies and hooked the girl up to an iv, administering the cocktail into her body. you checked her vitals and sighed in relief, she was stable.

“we gotta find her parents, what’s her name?” you asked the paramedics.

“only form of id was on her backpack,” the second paramedic handed you the girl’s belongings. the name ‘yuki’ was sewn on with purple thread. you frowned, “get the cops and child protective services. we need to find her family.”

“i’ll do that,” one of nurses spoke up.

“thank you,” you turned your attention back to the unconscious girl. you gently stroked her fine black hair, “we’re gonna find your family, kiddo. i promise.”

─────────────────

all the living injured were treated after three hours. your heart hardened from the sight of doctors having to inform family members that their loved ones didn’t make it. but your mind kept wandering to little yuki. you had to find her family.

“any word on your kid’s missing family?” dr. toyomitsu took you aside, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder. you shook your head and answered, “i’m scared that they were on the bus with her and.. and..” you sniffled, you couldn’t finish your sentence.

“come here,” you and dr. toyomitsu embraced, tears flowing freely from your (e/c) eyes. you wanted yuki to return home safe, that was all you wanted for her. you and dr. toyomitsu ended the hug, you staring up at the attending with sad eyes, “thank you.”

“of course,” he answered before checking his watch, “looks like we’re off the clock. wanna grab a drink?”

“sure, i could use one after day,” you sighed. the two of you went your separate ways to change clothes before meeting outside the hospital’s entrance. dr. toyomitsu looked good in a fresh change of clothes.

“i wanna praise you for surviving your first day on the job,” dr. toyomitsu mused aloud when you both arrived at the bar, “most interns don’t make it to hour ten, much less the whole shift. plus, the way you handled the bus crash cases, i applaud you.”

“well, don’t,” you grumbled, “i froze up when it came to yuki.”

“but she didn’t die,” he countered.

“she almost did,” you fired back with a glare.

dr. toyomitsu’s expression softened, “okay. maybe you did freeze up but what’s important is that you didn’t freeze up for too long.”

“i guess..” you waved down the bartender and ordered a rum and cola. 

“you’ll have a better day tomorrow. i can already sense it,” the handsome doctor commented to you. you laughed bitterly and exhaled, “one can only hope so,” before downing your rum and cola.

“i wish- i wish i could be like you,” you hiccuped, three rum and colas in. dr. toyomitsu, on the other hand, was five drinks in and holding it well. he raised an eyebrow at you and asked, “what do you mean?”

“you.. you’re so confident and cool!” you giggled, “like a superhero! and you’re hot, sooooo hot!”

dr. toyomitsu blushed at your words but he chalked it up to you being drunk, “thank you, dr. (l/n). that makes a lot to me.”

“of course!” you playfully nudged him, “but we’re off- off the clock! call me (y/n)! okie dokie? i’m (y/n)!”

“okay, (y/n). only if you call me taishiro.”

“okayyyyy, taishirooooo!”

time seemed to fly, as you drunkenly interacted with your boss. you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or the atmosphere but you felt your inhibitions slip away. taishiro had to cut you off after drink number five, not wanting you to get sick from the alcohol. 

“lemme get you a cab,” taishiro took you outside the bar and called you a cab.

“i don’t wanna leave you!” you whined. 

“you’ll see me tomorrow,” he chuckled.

loopy, you grabbed onto taishiro for stability and slammed your lips sloppily against his. taishiro tensed up from the kiss and pulled away.

“i’m sorry,” you hiccuped, tears in your eyes, “i’m drunk.”

“that you are,” he agreed.

“i’m so scared for yuki.

“i know. i am, too.”

a long pause.

“i wanna kiss you again.”

another pause.

“i wanna kiss you, too.”

so the two of you kissed, logic and reason out the window. taishiro’s lips tasted like candy, oh how you loved the taste. you pulled away from the kiss for air and smiled.

“see you tomorrow.”

“see yah, (y/n).”

maybe you two could kiss again when neither of you were drunk.

[olivetreehugger]

SnK Scouts/Veterans as Health Care Workers

Note: features Eren, Mikasa, Armin, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Levi, Erwin and Hange. A part two to my “SnK Warriors as HCWs” post found here. warning: mentions of blood, trauma, gore (it’s healthcare). Also, I know Hange is nb, I headcanon them as female, so I will be using she/her pronouns. 

Eren: this boy is definitely too involved in everything and has too many people depending on him at once to not be a nurse. The kid barely passed the NCLEX but that didn’t stop him from applying to every trauma center within a 25 mile radius of him. He got hired as a night shift trauma ICU nurse  and he frequently picks up shifts in the ER. He wears the cheapest scrubs he can find, often stained with ink in the pockets area. He isn’t a shitty nurse per se but there are tasks that still need to be done at the end of his shift and he gives a crappy report that’s missing too many details. Nurses hate picking up his patients, it’s always a mess. His charting is really spotty and he gets called into the manager’s office all the time to fix it. 

Still, he tries really hard to improve his time management and skills. He wants to be like his friends Mikasa and Reiner, who are the best nurses he knows. He wants to be involved in the traumatic cases and emergencies because he wants to learn as much as he possibly can. He’s really good at wound care, for some reason (hint hint). He’s kinda cocky sometimes too, which can be troublesome when Dr. Galliard is working. People know to steer clear of those two when they’re both  in the ER. Also, Eren always has a black cloud around him; whenever he works it’s gonna be a hella busy day in the hospital. Lots of emergency surgeries, intubations, codes and deaths. He’ll always jump in to help you if your patient is crashing, though, no matter how busy he is. 

Mikasa: she’s a prodigy. She was a straight ‘A’ student in nursing school, got a perfect 75 on the NCLEX and was immediately hired to the trauma ICU after doing a short internship there. She worked night shift for a year but her sleep schedule was so so fucked she started having night terrors, so she switched to day shift. Eren still calls her a traitor for it :/. She keeps trying to get him to switch over but he just hisses at her and threatens to chug a case of Monster energy drinks. She hasn’t given upon him yet, though.

This girl’s work ethic is beyond measure. She comes in exactly at 6:30 am, looks up her patients, takes report, gives a great update to the doctors when they round, and provides impeccable care to her patients. She knows exactly which treatments the doctors will order before they even speak. She’s incredible at inserting IVs--everyone in the hospital knows Mikasa Ackerman can put an 18g in a 90  yr old lady’s arm AND get blood return (just trust me, it’s flipping impossible). She has great skill when it comes to emergency situations and is a big believer in team work. If she notices your patient’s crashing and you don’t know what to do, she’ll calmly coach you and save your patient, too. All before lunch time. 

It doesn’t take Mikasa long to be promoted to charge nurse. When she’s in charge all the reports, paperwork and audits are completed before shift change. She divides the patient assignments really well and is very fair to the new grads. All around she’s an incredible nurse and leader on her unit, but don’t be fooled. If it’s been a rough day, Mikasa will get in her car and sob so loud her throat goes raw. A lot of people depend on her and working in a trauma ICU is really, really demanding. A lot of patients are demanding, rude and busy. She has a lot of trouble with stress management and is thinking of cutting her hours down so she can catch a break. Someone please hug her <3

Armin: for some reason my brain is just SCREAMING respiratory therapist. Like, I imagine this beautiful blond boy in gray scrubs (the color for RT’s in my hospital) going around helping intubate patients, giving nebulizer treatments and doing blood gases. I can just see him huffing and puffing when the attending doctor is overzealous about weaning vent support. -“Why are we changing the patient to pressure support? do you see how tachypneic he is on volume control?”

-“are you gonna put in the order? if not, your patient’s gonna be on PRVC all day, I’m not changing it without an order”

-“Doc, the patient looks like crap and their blood gas looks like death...oh, you still wanna extubate? ok, well I’m gonna leave the ventilator in here just in case. better yet, let me call a pastor in here, too.”

This kid is sassy af and he knows it. He’s smart af too, knows everything there is to know about the lungs and respiratory care. Knows every ventilator mode better than most doctors. Will certainly tell a resident off for ordering the wrong type of inhaler for a patient. He’s so damn intelligent that he even made the ice queen Annie melt like a popsicle. 

 He has no chill when it comes to his patients and even less chill (like -4078875874670) when a doctor gets in his way. For this reason, Armin has recently been toying with the idea of going to PA school so he can have a little more autonomy. He works al over the hospital, usually frequenting the trauma, CV, and medical ICU. The nurses there love him. 

Jean: Jeannie boy. Baby. Sweetie. He’s also a nurse. He is strictly dayshift and trauma. When he first started, he thought he’d do a year in the ICU and then go to CRNA school. He didn’t want to be around sickly patients with hopes and dreams and fears--it was too icky for him. But, over time, he learned that he LOVED trauma. Jean loves the controlled chaos that comes with the ugly, bloody messes that roll in through the ICU’s doors. He always gears up for trauma season (summer time) by bringing Dunkin Donuts iced coffee for everyone on the unit (day and night shift because he’s a supportive king). He gets really good at dealing with arrogant trauma residents and ortho docs who think they’re hot shit. When Jean sees a resident yelling at a nurse, he jumps in and threatens to have their license revoked. He will dig under their skin and page them incessantly throughout the day, too, just to get back at them. Jean is not a fan of lateral violence in the workplace, no sir. 

He always, always makes sure every room is stocked and new bags are hanging for the next shift. He has a thing where if things aren’t properly organized on the unit his brain just spazzes. He’s on the unit council and education committee because he also loves to teach the new grads. He also doubles as charge nurse, when management can’t be there (there can be one or more charge nurses amongst the staff, they usually work different days, though) He and Mikasa work so well together, teaming up to get tasks done, coding patients, running them down to get scanned, etc. People joke they’re the mom and dad of the unit. It makes them both blush <3 (Eren doesn’t like it, lol)

Jean loves to see patients healing from horrendous injuries, he’s constantly cracking jokes with the awake patients to try to make them feel better, and he’s really good at calming anxious family members down. Our boy just makes such good connections with people. He’s the guy you call when your confused patient is one second away from ripping his breathing tube out. He can convince the most restless, agitated patient to chill out. He’s got the voice for it. Also people love his mullet. It looks great. 

Connie: I really didn’t know at first but I feel like Connie would make a great physical therapist. He’s got great energy, he’s funny and I could see him dancing to Earth, Wind & Fire in front of his patients to hype them up for therapy. He’d be very sweet with them 

Sasha: I’m sick and tired of the food jokes, quite honestly. She’s more than that. In my mind, she’s an occupational therapist, helping disabled patients learn to feed, dress and clean themselves again. She works directly with Connie as they round on all their patients in the hospital, they make a great team!  She’s extremely patient and would make a very good nurse, but is unsure of where life is taking her. That is until she meets Niccolo the dietician in the cafeteria, and she falls hard. He encourages her to follow her heart and she does!  

Levi: Hm. This one stumped me. Levi is a bit...cold. It’s not like he has incredible social skills. He’s meticulous and focused and kinda mean? He reminds me of an anesthesiologist, tbh. Like he’ll sedate the shit outta you for surgery, makes sure you don’t die on the table, and then drops you off to the unit as fast as he can. He never takes off his mask while in the hospital and he scrubs maybe four times before surgery. He is very good at medication calculations and knows everything about nerve blocks, intubation, pain medication and sedation. He can look at a person and just KNOW what kind of sedative to give and how much. Your blood pressure will never bottom out while he’s there, he’ll warn the surgeon and immediately get that norepinephrine started.

 If Zeke is the one operating, Levi is on his ass to finish up the surgery ASAP and to not linger, because Zeke takes his time and ignores the tele monitor alarming in the background. After surgery, this 5′2 demon will scream at the 6′ resident about the importance of blood pressure management and sedation in neurosurgical patients. Levi plays no games and he also just really hates Zeke lol

He seems like a jerk but genuinely cares about getting his peeps through surgery. His favorite surgeon to work with is Hange Zoe, because she’s brilliant and fast, but also cognizant of her patient’s hemodynamics. Levi likes taking trauma cases as long as it’s with her. When he drops a patient off to the trauma ICU or goes there to intubate, he makes sure Jean or Mikasa are there because he knows everything is gonna go smoothly. He trusts them a lot. He likes Armin, too and even let him intubate a few times. On his breaks, he’s drinking tea and reading a Williams & Sonoma catalog or scrolling through cleaning Tik Tok lol.

Erwin: This man. This beautiful and hunky beefcake. Omg. I HC him as someone who went to nursing school, became a charge nurse on the trauma unit back in the early 2000′s and fell in love with it. Erwin would eventually fall in love with leadership and educating, too. He went back to school and earned his Doctorate of Nursing Practice (a practice doctorate). He managed the trauma unit for ten years before his brilliant leadership skills and wicked smart brain got him elected as the Director of Trauma Surgery recently. He is the first person with a nursing degree and DNP to ever accomplish this, so it’s very controversial. A lot of toxic doctors threaten to leave the hospital for this (because they’re assholes), but Erwin threatens to fire them in response and it usually shuts them up. 

He often holds lectures in the hospital auditorium. With a mind and voice like his, people are so drawn in by him. He advocates for nursing staff, for reimbursement when continuing their education, better staffing, parking, etc. He makes nice with doctors and gets them to sign petitions for the nurses to get these things. He’s a bit manipulative He’s also a fantastic manager and director, he’s really good at negotiating things. The nurses and residents all love him because he rounds on every ICU frequently, brings food, and asks them how he can help. He can be a bit daunting because of his height and deep voice but once he starts talking to you, you just get sucked in. All around an absolute king. 

Hange: This character reminds me of a trauma surgeon and intensivist (ICU doctor) we have, Dr. Omi. A great surgeon, really really smart, but takes absolutely NO bullshit. She will yell at you if you freeze during intubating. She wants you to recite every step before you take it, otherwise she’ll take the tube from you and do it herself. In surgery, she’s the same way. She wants you to learn, but by her standards. If she asks a question, you better know the answer or fess up right away, she doesn’t like the “uhms” of uncertainty as you try to search for a shitty response. Either you know it or you don’t. And if you don’t, she’ll teach you. Yeah she can be rough around the edges, but she’s got a big heart. She loves her trauma team. She buys them breakfast and gives them funny personalized gifts. One time, she bought an apply tree for Mikasa and brought it to her car at the end of a shift. Mikasa forgot to plant it and it died in her backseat. Hange will sometimes ask, “Mikasa, how’s your apple tree growing?” and Mikasa will lie through her teeth. “It’s growing!” Fess up, Mikasa. Those google search apple trees are starting to look familiar.

All around Hange loves to work and teach. She is a wonderful trauma surgeon and has saved tons of lives.  

[arcturusreads]

Sports Day - Merhayes

Another AO3 prompt where Cormac has a moment with Meredith's kids. who's surprised that they knew him that well.

Meredith wasn’t quite sure who came up with the idea for Grey-Sloan Family Sports Day, but she was going to kill Bailey for agreeing with it. It’s not that she didn’t love her kids and wanted to spend time with. Mer spent a lot of time playing tag with Ellis, in the back garden, kicking a ball around in a lame attempt of soccer with Bailey and helped Zola with some amateur gymnastics but sports day was something else.

Sports day meant egg and spoon races, three legged races and who knew what else. Meredith was not athletic, not by a long shot and would have happily just watched everyone else take part. Unfortunately, her kids had seen the flyer that Amelia had bought home with her and were determined that Meredith took part in every parent race that was being held. She’d tried for a while to convince them that Maggie or Amelia could also take part, but her kids all had her stubborn streak. So, Meredith now found herself signed up to more races that she had ever done in her life.

The day of the event had been cursed with sunshine. Meredith had been hoping for a downpour of rain so the whole thing could get called off, but her kids had run into her bedroom that morning, with Zola yanking the curtain open and lo and behold, sunlight had come streaming in.

When they had made it to the field, Meredith laid out the picnic blanket. Catching the kids before they all ran off, she made sure that they were slathered with sunscreen. The courses were still being set up and families still needed to arrive, so Mer took the opportunity to lay down and close her eyes, using the discarded jackets as a pillow. She was just about ready to drift off when a soccer ball came flying into her side.

“Ooft,” Mer shot upright to see her son with a cheeky grin on his face.

“Sorry, mommy.” Not that Bailey looked or sounded sorry in slightest

He quickly changed to his face to his puppy-dog eyes which reminded her exactly of Derek and all she could do was laugh.

“It’s fine, sweetie but mommy isn’t the goal post.”

“Are you gonna come and join us?” Ellis begged as she ran to join her brother.

“Please, mommy, it’ll be fun!” Zola added in.

One of them she might have been able to say no to, maybe even two but when then three of them got together, she stood no chance. The moment she had become a mother, Meredith had known that she wanted a part of her kids’ lives in a way that her mother never had been. Ellis Grey wouldn’t be seen dead at a family sports day but for Meredith, as much as she had been dreading the actual races, these were the kind of days that she loved most.

Surgery was amazing, the thrill and the rush of adrenaline that she got from it was always going to be one of her favourite feelings, but nothing would beat how she felt when she spent time with her kids. Even when they left the house a mess and drove her crazy, Mer knew that she would give up everything for them.

So, Meredith pushed herself up from her seat, picking up the soccer ball and ran with it. It took her kids a minute to realise what was going on before they ran after her.

“Mommy, that isn’t how you play soccer!” Bailey yelled behind her.

She looked back over at them and laughed, wishing that they would always be this carefree and happy. Eventually she stopped in her tracks and threw the ball to Ellis.

“Come on, Ellie Belle, it’s us against them.”

As she caught the ball, Ellis stuck her tongue out to her younger siblings and as quick as her little legs would take her. A quick look over her should made her see that Bailey was close to catching up with her and out of panic, Ellis quickly launched the ball away from her, to whoever was nearest. Who happened to be the Head of Paediatric Surgery.

“Ellis,” Meredith jogged over to her kids, all three of whom were grinning up at the Irish surgeon. “What did we say about throwing the ball at guests?”

“But Dr Mac isn’t a guest momma, we’re not home!”

Sometimes Meredith wished her kids weren’t that logical but at five-years-old, Ellis had an answer for everything.

“Still, baby, we’ve got to be careful and only throw to people who are in the game.”

“Dr Hayes doesn’t mind. Do you Dr Hayes?” Bailey turned to Cormac who grinned before kneeling with the soccer ball in hand.

“Absolutely not, Bailey but your mother is right, you have to be careful, okay?”

Ellis nodded eagerly at Cormac who gave her a wink.

“And how are you doing, Miss Zola? How did that science project go?”

Beaming, Zola pushed her chest out in pride. “I got the best in the class! Mrs Johnson said it’s the best she’s ever seen!”

“I’m impressed, you’re going to have to show me some time.”

“I could bring it to the hospital, if that okay with you, Mommy?” Zola turned to look at her mom.

Still in a little shock over how well Cormac seemed to know her kids, she managed to nod. “Yeah, sure thing, Zozo. You can bring it with you next time you come into work with me.”

“And how about you, Bailey? Did you manage to make the soccer team?”

Bailey sighed dramatically. “Yeah,” he drew out looking at the ground.

“You don’t seem too happy about that.”

“I am!” Bailey quickly shot back, not wanting Dr Hayes to think that he didn’t enjoy soccer anymore. “But because stuff’s closed, they said we have to wait until the new school year to play.”

“Ahh,” Cormac nodded in understanding, “I see, well that just gives you time to practice over Summer, right? And then you can get even better.”

Not having thought of it that way, Bailey was suddenly very excited about being on the soccer team again.

“Momma said I can start swimming lessons when they open again!” Ellis piped up, not wanting to be left out.

“Oh really,” Cormac smiled and arched an eyebrow. “Is that going to make you a mermaid princess then?”

“Yes!” Ellis started to jump up and down, nearly tripping over her own feet.

Meredith held out her hands to stead her little girl. “Alright you three, why don’t you get the ball back from Dr Hayes and go play, I’ll join you guys in a second.”

“Okay, it was really nice seeing you again, Dr Hayes!” Zola flashed him a bright smile as she took the ball.

“Are you here for sports day? Will you come and play with us later?”

Before Meredith was able to object and say that Cormac probably had better things to do, he replied. “I’m here with my boys and I’m sure they’d love to join us as well if you don’t mind.”

The prospect of having other boys to play was the best news Bailey could have had. “Yes, thank, Dr Hayes! Zola! Zola, guess what?” And with that Bailey was chasing after his sister to tell her his good news.

Ellis was the only one left and Meredith wondered why she hadn’t gone with her brother and sister yet but suddenly Ellis wrapped her arms around Cormac’s neck. “Bye, Dr Mac.” Giggling, she let go and went to join Ellis and Bailey.

Cormac straightened himself to full height, “What?” He saw the curious look on Meredith’s face.

“How do you and my kids know each other so well?”

Chuckling nervously, Cormac answered, “I-uh, spent a lot of time talking to them on video chat when they would ring to talk to you. I hope you don’t mind…”

He was worried that he had overstepped a mark. At the time, he just wanted to help cheer them up. He knew how his sons had been when their mom had been in hospital and at least she had been awake and responsive.

“Mind? No, but I hope you’re ready because they’re going to have a million and one questions whenever they see you.” She was teasing him, but it was also true. Her kids were just an inquisitive as she was.

“Somehow that doesn’t surprise me. You’ve got a great bunch there, Grey. Seem to take after their mother.”

[staywritten]

A Love That Last│Bang Chan IV

A Love That Lasts │ Chapter IV

Synopsis: You’ve spent the last two years, helping your very handsome next door neighbor raise his adorable daughter. The two of you fell into a routine before you knew it. And now you had this little family. You couldn’t help but fall for him.

Genre: Parent!Au, Dad!Bang Chan, Fluff, Nonidol!Au, smut in a later chapter

Word Count: 2365

Part I │Part II │Part III │

You grumbled sitting at your desk, you’d been staring at the same screen for the past 45 minutes, not making a dent in your paperwork. You were at a loss. You didn’t need to get Minseo from school, there was nothing to do at home, and you came into work on your day off because the thought of staying home and having to deal with maybe seeing Chan leave for his date kind of broke your heart. 

You spent a good portion of the day trying to piece together your memories from last night, it was mostly foggy after getting to the bar. You remembered bits and pieces of conversations here and there. Woojin taking you home, but there was just this small part of your memory. That felt too real to be a dream. Chris holding your hand, touching your cheeks, calling you beautiful. It was just so real. 

But you were sure you were just reflecting.

Woojin knocked on your office door poking his head inside. “I come bearing tasty gifts” he held up a paper bag from the cafe down the road and a cup of coffee.

“Please come in” you sat up and gestured to your open chair. “Minho told me you took me home last night, I’m sorry for troubling you, technically I’m the one who owes you coffee”

“You’re never a trouble” he set the coffee in front of you. “Iced americano, two pumps of vanilla and a banana nut muffin”

“How’d you know my order?” you grinned happily taking a sip.

“Minho can be forthcoming when he wants to be”

You laughed and leaned back in your chair. “Seriously Woojin I’m sorry about last night, I got a little excited drinking” you peaked over at him from the top of the lid “Did...I do anything weird last night? Or say anything?”

“Not at all, you were a little gigglier than usual, it was refreshing to see the serious surgeon be so free”

“I’m glad you find me amusing” you laughed, still embarrassed about last night. You sighed trying to work the courage to just up and ask him. “Woojin...Did I...er...When you put me to bed last night nothing weird happened right…?”

“Describe weird?” he leaned closer, making this unreadable expression. It was teasing almost? Like he knew something you didn’t.

“...Like..I...Did I try to make a move on you…? Like kiss you or anything?” As soon as the words escaped your lips you groaned and covered your face, trying to hide your embarrassment. 

He laughed, his arms folding over his broad chest. “Do you think we kissed?”

“I dunno” you pouted, getting a little annoyed at how amusing he was finding this. “I..don’t think so but I just needed to ask”

He smiled softly seeing you pick at the lid of the coffee, in a frustrated huff. And as much as he would have liked you to make a move on him, it wasn’t fair to lie or to tease you. “I took you home last night...and your neighbor, Chris took you inside.” 

“Chris did?” your eyes widened, and it almost felt like that was the last piece of the puzzle. It was the reason your dreams felt so real. It was why he looked at you like that, this morning.

Hyunjin knocked on the door “Oh there you are Doc, Dr. Lee said it’s almost time for your meeting”

Woojin smiled “I almost forgot about that, thank you” he stood up and gave you a knowing wink. “Good luck”

“Thank you Woojin...” 

After a few more hours of work, you decided to call it a night. It’d gotten later than you intended on staying and you figured now was a good time to go home. Surely Chan left for his date already so you could avoid that awkward. Oh, hey you look nice. Niceties. Of course he looked nice, he was beautiful. He always looked nice.

You made it home, changed out of your work clothes and into a nice comfy pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt before heading over to Chan’s. “Knock knock” you opened the door to see a very tired Felix sitting on the ground as Minseo balanced herself on the couch, tying up his hair. “What are you doing?” you snorted seeing as Minseo stuck a bow clip in his hair. 

“You’re here!!!” Minseo jumped down and ran into your arms. You crouched down to meet her, scooping her up. “I missed you! I missed you! I missed you!!” she snuggled into you as you showered her with kisses. “It’s been forever!” she pouted. 

“I missed you so much Baby” you cradled her against your chest, swinging her around. “It has been forever” at this point in your relationship. Not eating dinner with her, not reading her a story, and not taking her to school. You’ve basically missed a whole day and it truly felt like forever. 

“Don’t do that again…” she pouted. “I didn’t like that…”

“Like what?” you sat down on the couch, holding her in your lap. 

“Not seeing you…” she frowned. “It was lonely...Daddy was lonely too, I could tell” she huffed. 

“Minseo… you can’t be selfish” Felix interjected. “Sometimes people have to spend time with their other friends or family, we have to share”

“But we’re a family too!” she huffed. 

Your eyes softened, pressing your forehead against hers “Minseo… Baby listen to me… I love you to the moon and back and we will always be a family. It doesn’t matter if I see you every second of every day” you smiled and booped her nose “Or if a million years went by before I saw you again, I will never stop loving you”

She pouted “Promise?” she held out her pinky and you wrapped your pinky with hers, pressing your thumbs together. 

“I promise” you smiled, poking her cheek making it dimple. “There’s that super special megawatt smile I love, now go change into your jammies and then we can bake cookies for your dad when he comes back”

“Cookies?! Really?”

“Really really” you laughed helping her down as she hurried to the room.

Felix smiled standing up. “You are really something” he chuckled. “Minseo has been throwing a temper tantrum all day, even her teacher talked to me about it. I guess it was just a lot to deal with, you went out last night Channie-Hyung tonight. Her routine got disrupted and she just lashed out, but you dealt with her really well. You validated her concerns, you listened” he rubbed the back of his neck, looking down “I practically yelled at her for not understanding… I have a lot to learn”

You laughed “Felix, I have a lot to learn, I let my personal feelings get in the way of spending time with her. I was being petty last night”

“Personal feelings huh? Personal feelings about Hyung?” he wiggled his eyebrows playfully. “Come on, tell me. You have the hots for Hyung don’t you?”

“If you’re gonna say it like that I’m not answering!” you rolled your eyes and playfully pushed him out of the way going into the kitchen to gather ingredients.

“I’m practically a psychic about these things.You could say it’s a sixth sense” he grinned at you from across the kitchen island. “My sixth sense is saying you looooove him” he teased.

“Yeah. I do” 

“Ha! I knew it you-” he stopped and his expression softened. “Wait...Seriously? You love him?” You peaked up at him, giving him a coy smile while setting the mixing bowl out. “You’re in love with him...you guys...but...how come you never told him?”

“I guess I was scared...like what if he only thought of me platonically and then it’d be embarrassing to get rejected and I didn’t want to make things awkward around Minseo so…”

“You two are made for each other” he groaned, rubbing his temples. “I cannot believe this...you let him go on a blind date knowing you love him?”

“What right do I have to stop him?” you laughed. “And let’s just say I only realized I had feelings recently, besides I don’t want flack from you.” you shot him a glare. “You literally set him up”

“I-” he sighed “I’m gonna fix this”

“Felix you don’t have to-”

“No, no I’m gonna fix it” Felix ran out, slipping on his shoes before you could even slip a word in. 

Minseo skipped out of the room in her pajamas. “I can’t wait to make cookies!” She looked around and pouted. “Where’d Uncle Felix go?”

“He...had to go...uh fix something?” She nodded seemingly satisfied with your explanation. You lifted her up and set her on the counter. “I hope you don’t mind just hanging out with me instead”

“Nah, you’re my favorite!” she beamed, grabbing the whisk.

“More than Felix?”

She nodded “Waaaaaaay more”

“More than your Dad?”

She pouted and scrunched her face, as she was weighed her options, her little bottom protruding “Hmmm… you’re tied with Daddy, it’s equal”

“Fair” you laughed, kissing her forehead. “So do you want to make chocolate chip cookies?”

“Hmmm can we make white chip? It’s Daddy’s favorite, and he looked sad today”

“Minseo… you, are honestly the sweetest and most amazing person” you grinned, squishing her cheeks. 

She gave you the brightest, dimpled smile. “I am pretty cool huh?”

The two of you spent the last hour making way more cookies than you could reasonably eat. All of the extra cookies ended up getting bundled in little baggies for your friends and colleagues. You ended your night the same you did every night, a movie of her choice, until you two knocked out.

Minseo relaxed in your arms as you smoothed down her hair, humming a soft melody. “Are you and Daddy fighting?”

“Of course not, what makes you say that?”

“Because you didn’t eat with us yesterday and Daddy didn’t eat with me today..Did I do something bad? Is this punishment?”

“No, no no” you hugged her tighter, pressing a kiss against her hair “You’ve never done anything wrong, you’re not being punished at all. It’s just that lately your dad has plans and sometimes I have plans” you frowned. “We talked about this, remember?”

“How come you guys don’t have plans together?”

“Because we have different friends”

“In school Mr. Yang said we should be friends with everyone”

“And he’s very right, but sometimes it’s a little hard” you smiled at her.

“Can you try?”

You laughed and nodded “You’re right, I’ll try harder”

She started to become a little more invested in the movie, saving you from the stress that comes with dealing with just how unfiltered and candid children’s questions were. Up until she got bored of it again and looked at you. “When are you and Daddy gonna get married”

You coughed, almost choking on your juice box. “Well you see...what normally happens is that two people meet, and then they date and then they get married” you smiled. “Me and your Dad, are only friends”

“So date because, then you can get married and then I can have a Mom”

“Minseo...where is this coming from? Did something happen?”

She frowned. “No…”

“You know you can tell me anything…”

“I know...it’s just at school we’re making mother’s day cards and I don’t have one… Mr. Yang said I can make one for Daddy but...some of the other kids said I was weird…”

“You are not worried” you cupped her squishy cheeks. “You’re amazing and you have a beautiful big family.”

“I have a small family…” she grumbled. “I don’t have a mom or brother”

Your expression softened “Minseo...I know you don’t have a traditional family, but you have something more” you kissed her head “Don’t focus on what you don’t have, focus on what you have. You may not have a mom or a brother, but you have things other people don’t”

“I have Daddy” she smiled. “I mean, other people have one too but mines the best” she chimed.

“Yes he is, what else do you have?”

“I have Uncle Felix and he has a million freckles and he buys me ice cream and his Korean isn’t good” she giggled when you poked her tummy. 

“All of that is very true” you beamed

“And Uncle Binnie, and Uncle Jisung are super cool and they watch me when I go to work with Daddy and Uncle Binnie says a billion words super quick and Uncle Jisung is a quokka!” she grinned and looked at you, hugging you tight “And I have you… you’re my best friend and you keep my secrets and I love you to the moon and back!”

“And I have you” you booped her nose “You’re all I need, sometimes it’s pretty cool not having a normal family.”

“I love you guys...but sometimes...just sometimes...I think it’d be nice to have a Mom too”

“Have you ever told your Dad about this?���

She shook her head profusely. “Daddy seems sad when someone mentions Mom...I don’t want Daddy to be sad..so don’t tell him” she pouted. “Secret…” she held out her pinky, waiting for you to wrap it around hers. 

“Secret” you whispered. 

While pressing her thumb against yours she giggled. “Don’t tell anyone, but I think you would make the coolest mom”

“Well I know you’d make the coolest daughter” you tickled her tummy making her laugh.

Chan sighed quietly, leaning against the outside of his apartment door. A soft smile on his lips as he listened in on you and his daughter from the open window. Originally he planned on just coming home, but hearing Minseo sound so frustrated he decided to wait. You always had a way of handling her well and he didn’t want to distract her. He just wasn’t prepared to hear how sincere you were, how loving and warm your words were. 

He felt awkward coming home now, he wanted to give you two some more time alone. He tried to gather his thoughts by staring at the stars. There was a lot to take in, a lot of things he’s hesitated on acting on just from fear and it all seemed so silly now. It was like everything was crystal clear. 

Although his date went well enough and Yeji was sweet. It didn’t matter, there was no room in his heart for anyone else. It was pointless. He was in love with you. 

To be continued….

Part V

Hey friends! I hope you liked that new chapter, I know some of my writing can be kind of long so I’m posting all of my series on my Ao3 as well! I will be posting on my tumblr first but feel free to read it there if you’d like

A Love That Lasts Masterlist

∘Tags List:

@skzsprinkles @tophuphu​ @hugs4chan  @cobbiebaexqueen @minnieskz

[erin-bo-berin]

By Your Side

MASTERLST

This was requested by and is dedicated to @be-the-bravest​, my name AND birthday twin. The poor thing dealt with appendicitis and an appendectomy on her birthday and a few following days. I’m so incredibly sorry that you had to go through that on your birthday of all days, Erin, but I hope this makes your recovery a little better. This is some incredibly fluffy, sweet goodness and you can’t convince me that Spencer wouldn’t do this for someone he loves. Hope you all enjoy some fluff to start your week and happy reading!

Spencer Reid/Reader

Rating: G (fluff)

Word Count: 1,796

This wasn’t exactly how you’d planned your birthday.

You’d been excited about your birthday for months. You’d been dreaming about a day filled with spending time with friends, family and your boyfriend, Spencer.

You were too old for parties—not that parties were necessarily a bad thing—but you were one who much preferred eating out and going on adventures.

You’d planned an entire day; brunch with your family and Spencer at your parents house, browsing yours and Spencer’s favorite book stores, dinner with Spencer’s work family and then a movie marathon with him that night.

Spencer had even taken a day off of work, something he rarely did. Having a job in the FBI meant demanding work and you admired how passionate he was about his job. According to him, this was the first time he’d taken time off in well over five years. It was touching that he did it just for you.

When you were younger, the thought of getting older scared you. You’d realized with each year you turned a new age, you’d never get back any of those previous years. Now though, you viewed it as a celebration of another year filled with ups and downs—and making it through the year, especially when you got to celebrate it with the people closest to you. Besides, the older you got the less you worried about aging; you were only as old as you felt after all.

All of your anticipated plans evaporated as quickly as a snap of fingers.

The pain had begun the previous night, a dull pain in your stomach. You were expecting your period at any time, so you chalked it up to that. You went to bed early with a heating pad and no second thoughts. By the time Spencer had come to bed, the pain had eased a bit to the point of uncomfortable, but bearable pain and you didn’t consider anything else.

The bright, early hours of your birthday changed your opinion though.

You and Spencer didn’t have to be at your parent’s house for brunch until 11 am, but you woke just before 7, the pain in your abdomen more than you could bear.

You cried out as you tried to sit up in bed.

Either Spencer was just finely tuned to know when something was wrong with you or he’d slept incredibly light last night—something pretty unusual for him.

He was up in an instant, concern written all over his face as he checked on you. 

“Baby, what’s wrong?”

Definitely in tune with you.

“My stomach is killing me,” you groaned, “What time is it?”

He peered at the alarm clock on his side of the bed. 

“6:49. Why don’t you lay back down? We still have a few hours before we have to be at your parents’.”

Spencer helped you lay back down and took your heating pad.

“Do you need me to reheat it for you?”

You nodded, in too much discomfort to talk.

“Get some rest,” he said, kissing your head before heading downstairs.

A few minutes later, he returned with the newly warmed heating pad, wrapped in a hand towel and placed it on your lower stomach.

“Has the heating pad helped any?” he asked, recalling that you’d slept with it last night as well.

“It was last night. But now it doesn't even touch it,” you whimpered.

You’d never given birth, but you were certain this is what labor felt like.

The pain was like internal sharp pin pricks, but then it’d ease off into a more mild and dull sensation. No matter what you did though, the pain was still persisting.

“You look flushed,” he commented, worried.

“I’m about to burn up,” you said, tossing the heating pad aside.

He felt your forehead and looked even more concerned.

“Where exactly does it hurt, Y/N?”

You motioned to your lower abdomen and then to an area slightly to the right.

“We need to get you to the emergency room now,” he said, his mind made up.

“What? No! I’m fine!”

You tried to sit up and cried out at the sharp pain, tears forming in your eyes.

“Babe, it could be anything from an ovary issue to gallbladder issues. It might even be appendicitis, you need to get it checked out now.”

You knew better than to argue with him. Whatever plans you’d had for your birthday had just gone out the window.

•

You sat hunched in the emergency room as Spencer checked you in. You were in so much pain now, you couldn’t talk.

Unfortunately, it was a wait, but at least you were on the high priority list.

You sat, half hunched, half curled into Spencer, whimpering and clutching his hand the entire time you waited.

“I know honey, I know,” he whispered.

He alternated between rubbing your back, kissing your head and murmuring softly to you.

It took over two hours, but considering the normal wait time, you were pretty fortunate.

Things moved pretty quickly after that.

You were taken back, a full exam and blood work being done. Next, came an ultrasound.

An agonizing amount of time passed as you waited for the results of the ultrasound while still in a good amount of pain.

Spencer didn’t leave your side though. He tried his best to distract you and take your mind off of your pain.

He also was kept busy by keeping everyone updated. Between your parents and the team from the Behavioral Analysis Unit, his phone had hardly left his hands.

Your friends and family were amazing, sending you birthday wishes, videos to lift your spirits, even some of their kids had made drawings for you. It helped some and you were eternally grateful for Spencer as he kept showing you new well wishes with a smile on his face.

The diagnosis came back quickly, when they saw the ultrasound. Just as Spencer had suspected, it was appendicitis.

“You’re in luck, our surgeon is going to be able to fit you in for this evening. We need to remove the appendix as soon as possible to avoid any further complications,” the doctor on call—Dr. Martin—told you.

“Happy birthday to me,” you mumbled.

After Dr. Martin left, a nurse was the next to come in. She administered antibiotics to help fight any infection and told you the anesthesiologist would be there soon to prep you for surgery.

The day had simultaneously passed in a flash yet crawled at a snail’s pace. You no longer cared that it was your birthday, you just wanted to feel better. You were exhausted, in severe pain and wanted to cry, as if that would make you feel any better.

“I’m sorry you feel so awful, baby,” Spencer frowned, stroking your hair from where he sat next to the hospital bed.

You mumbled your thanks sleepily and yawned.

“You should try to sleep,” he frowned.

“I would if it didn’t feel like there was a knife lodged into my abdomen,” you groaned.

After the anesthesiologist arrived and administered your medicine, you didn’t remember much. With your exhaustion and the drugs both combined, the world blurred increasingly around the edges. Just as you were about to give into the seduction of sleep, you heard Spencer say something to you.

“Don’t worry, Y/N. I’ll be right here by your side the moment you’re out of surgery.”

•

The next thing you remembered was waking up in recovery.

“Surgery went well, Y/N,” Dr. Martin said, “You should be good as new in two weeks.”

You gave a groggy groan and fell asleep again. It dawned on you that you hadn’t even checked to see where Spencer was, but before you could open your eyes to look, sleep took hold.

-

Your eyes opened again and it was dark outside. Only one light above the bed illuminated the room besides the moonlight that shone through the window.

“Nice to see you awake again,” you heard the familiar voice of your boyfriend.

You looked over and saw Spencer refilling your water cup for you.

“I got you some jello,” he grinned.

“Ugh, ew,” you groaned, turning up your nose.

You were definitely not a fan of jello—much to Spencer’s dismay.

“Hey, I resent that,” Spencer chuckled, “Technically I asked the nurse for some for you, but in reality I’m gonna eat it.”

He walked over to your bedside, leaning over and kissing you.

“How are you feeling?”

“Tired and sore. Hopefully I get some good pain medicine,” you smiled weakly.

“Oh you will. Your nurse was just in here ten minutes ago and administered your first dose. She said it should be kicking in within a half hour.”

“Thank God,” you mumbled.

Your eyes raked over your boyfriend who—like he’d promised���was still at your side. He looked tired and rattled but relieved to know you would be okay.

“How are you, Spence? You’ve been up since 7 this morning,” you commented, worried about him.

“I’m fine, don’t worry about me,” he frowned, putting a hand to your cheek, stroking it gently, “I’m just glad you’re okay. I hated seeing you in so much pain.”

“Guess we won’t be having kids then,” you joked.

“Y/N,” he gave you a look, but he was smiling.

“Pretty sure I can survive labor if I survived that pain,” you said, “At least with labor you get an epidural. Spencer, invent an epidural for appendicitis, stat.”

He laughed, his eyes crinkling, a trait you loved about him.

“I think you need to rest, honey, you’re clearly sleep deprived.”

“I don’t want to,” you pouted, “Can you cuddle me?”

“I’m not gonna risk hurting you,” he said adamantly.

“I’ll be fine. Besides, it’s my birthday still, right? I want cuddles.”

His face softened, any trace of his earlier humor gone.

“I’m so sorry you had to spend your birthday like this, Y/N,” he said, frowning.

He pushed a piece of your hair off your face and sighed, seemingly resigned to something.

“Alright, you win. Scoot over.”

You smiled, moving slowly and carefully over in the bed in an attempt to make enough room from him.

He spread out next to you, positioning himself to face you.

“Better,” you said.

You smiled your first real smile of the day then.

“You know, I may have had a shitty birthday, but I’m glad it was another birthday spent with you. You hardly didn’t leave my side.”

“I’ll always be by your side, no matter what you face.”

He took your hand, bringing it towards his lips and kissed it gently.

“I love you,” you smiled up at him.

“I love you too.”

 He returned your smile, placing an arm very gently over your waist.

“Happy birthday, Y/N.”

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[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Space Orcs, “Reunited.”

Just tying up some loose ends, also see the post I made right before this about a stupid story that happened to me while writing this. It is kind of funny :) 

The day was hot, very hot, and the sun beat down on fort harmony with merciless intent. Over the tarmac, the sweltering heat caused little mirrages, as puddles of water to appear and then vanish down the runway. 

The heat was oppressive enough that no birds sang, and even the roaring of the engines had been dulled by a day that none of the en were willing to venture out of the air cooled airplane hangers.

Only one figure remained outside staring up at the blue sky and the oppressive sun beaming down upon her.

Waffles limped over the hot pavement, the tarmac burning the delicate pads of her feet, but if she stopped walking it would only hurt even more.

Her tail drooped towards the ground,

It was so hot.

She made it across the tarmac and down to the little shaded area where someone had set up a discarded cardboard box and a bowl of water.

Her feet continued to ache, and she licked at them with her long, pink, tongue though that only brought momentary relief from the burns.

Across the tarmac two men watched her form the open hanger door. It wasn’t that they hadn’t tried to get her to come inside, they had, it was just that she wouldn't, and no amount of cajoling or bribing her had worked. THey felt bad of course, but there was nothing much else they could do.

One of the men felt bad enough to brave the heat and bring over a bag of ice which he pressed onto her paws for a time before having to return to his work.

Waffles laid her head down and closed her eyes ears drooping.

So hot 

Overhead an engine sounded. It was a familiar noise by now,and only one of her eyes cracked open to watch the shuttle descend from the sky and come to land on the scouring earth. She closed her eyes again, listening to the distant sounds as the shuttle doors open, and human voices swelled up around her.

It was then that she was hit with the smell.

IThe heat washed over her face and straight up into her nose with a smell she had been waiting for for months now. 

She shot to her feet ears up nose lifted.

Her tail began to wag 

And despite the heat of the burning tarmac, she raced across the open space yipping and barking and whining for all she was worth

***

Adam stepped out of the shuttle into a sheer wall of heat. It was like being punched in the face by the sun. The borrowed flight suit he now wore was immediately sweltering and he fanned himself with one hand already beginning to pant.

Behind him Sunny and the other stepped down onto the tarmac.

Sunny Immediately yelped and sprung back into the shuttle

Adam couldn’t help but laugh, but that was when a high pitched whining noise reached his ears. A whining barking, yipping noise that immediately had him turning towards the sound eyes wide.

It started out as a small shape barely distinguishable from the sand and grass to the side of the tarmac, and then, as it raced towards him it coalesced into a furry bullet.

“Watffles!” He shouted, taking a few steps down from the ramp as she raced up, and leaped into the air.

He caught her mid arc staggering back a few steps as she attacked his face was the kind of love that could only be bestowed by man's best friend. She whined and whimpered and her tail wagged and her body wriggled so hard he had a tough time holding onto her. 

“Hey pretty girl!”

Wavvles whimpered and barked some more licking his face and the side of his head repeatedly to the point where his hair was damp.

He laughed and held her to his chest, her tail thudding against his side and back.

She didn’t seem very inclined to get down, and the Tarmac was so hot he worried about her paws burning. So instead he held her like a large baby in his arms, and once she was finally done licking his face, she rested her head against his neck and chest nuzzling every now and against at his chin just to remind him she was there.

Not that he could forget an 80 lb German Shepherd.

Behind him the others were laughing and awing.

Ramirez had videoed the whole thing, and continued to video as they made their way across the tarmac and too one of the hangers. Waffles didn’t seem to have any intention of getting down.

Finally they stepped into the hanger, and reluctantly he set her back on the floor, though she insisted on sitting on his feet every time he came to a stop.

Across the room there was a clamouring of voices, and A group of at least five people came charging across the room.

His family hugged him so hard, he thought he was going to crack a rib, and he laughed right along with them as they stammered out nar incoherent sentences.

Eventually his mother pulled back wiping her eyes on hand resting on his cheek the other on his shoulder, “Boy, you need a shave.”

He smiled, “Yeah, can't say there are many razors in a wormhole.”

“I knew it, I knew it. Our baby brother is invincible.” David announced, slapping him on the back so hard he nearly stumbled forward.

Waffles looked up at him her tial thudding against the floor, her tongue lolling form her mouth

“Where were you!”

“Not sure if I am allowed to say just yet, but i'll tell you when I know what I am allowed to say. Let's just start by saying that it wasn’t pleasant, but it’s a great story, ad it involves  miraculous escape planned and executed by yours truly in a fantastic manor.”

HIs mother sighed, “At least you came back wit hall your body parts in tact this time.”

She turned her head to look down and smiled, “Dr. Krill we are so glad you made it back too. We were devastated to hear that you had gone missing as well.”

The doctors saved a polite hand, “No matter.”

She gave him a very light hug anyway, careful to avoid crushing him or something, which he seemed to enjoy despite himself.

Thomas crossed his arms, “Hey, is anyone gonna thank me for bringing him back in one piece?”

Martha sighed and grabbed him up in a hug, “Thank you for bringing yourself home in one piece.” She pulled back, “ How was the war.”

HE grinned, “It was awesome, we mounted a revolution.”

She shook her head, “I can’t take you anywhere because you're either discovering extraterrestrial life or overthrowing corrupt governments.”

Thomas grinned, “Plus I think this has finally made me realize what I want to do with my life.”

Adam smiled as he watched his brother, this was arguably the happiest he had ever seen thomas: who was known for his sullen nature and moodiness. Life hadn’t been easy on him, and he had jumped and bounced from one thing to another in between relapses.

“Oh, and what is that?”

He motioned back to where the rest of the group was standing, “Well I was talking to Ramirez and Maverick and I…. I think joining the marines would be good for me.” He got a slap on the back from their father, who seemed more than pleased with the idea.

Martha assigned, “Of course I should  have seen that coming.” She smile, “I am proud of you. Just try not to overthrown anymore empires while you’re at it.”

He grinned, “No promises.

Adam got hugged a few more times after that seeing as no one was really willing to believe that he was alive.

Even the men he didn’t know from around base stopped by to shake his hand and tell him how glad they were that he was back.

The UNSC sorely missed him.

At some point Krill insisted on doctoring him, and dragged him back into the medical bay where he did all he docterly things, blood pressure temperature pulse. Sunny stood in the corner with both sets of arms crossed over her chest.

He might have asked her to wait in the hall, but he had a feeling that that request wouldn’t go down so well, so he let it go.

Krill examined the three large gashes on his chest and where they had healed over into large, livid puckered red scars.

“Hmm, I could probably fix this. WIth a consultation from a plastic surgeon.” He muttered 

Adam waved him off, ‘It’s alright Krill, I think they look kind of badass, sort of a tarzan king of the jungle sort of vibe.”

Krill glowered at him, “Well one of these days you are just going to have to pick ONE vibe, because space cyborg pirate Tarzan is getting to be a bit of a mouthful.”

Adam laughed.

Sunny harumphed glowering angrily at the new scars.

Krill turned to look down at the ones on his upper forearms, which hadn’t scarred up yet, but where still in the process of being scabbed over, “And what are these.”

“Er…. I had to get the attention of the keepers, and that was the only way to do it without them heightening security on me.”

Sunny’s fists clenched even further.

Krill flipped over his hand, which was still raw and red, “Let me guess”

Adam shrugged sheepishly, “Well you know how it is.”

He turned his head to look at Sunny and quickly looked away as her stare bored a hole in his forehead.

At the end of the medical bay, the door slid open and a soldier stepped inside hurrying over to offer him a set of ACUs and a pair of boots, “These should fit sir, the brass will be here in half and hour, and will meet with you in the war room… I… mean the conference room !A.” He turned on his heels and walked out, big boots clomping on the tile as he went.

Adam changed quickly and managed to hunt down a razor in enough time to get a quick shave in before meeting with his superiors. He didn’t understand why other men wanted a beard so much, it was really nothing to be happy about, and it made his face itch. Felt so much better when the thing was finally gone and he was free.

Sunny was a little miffed when she had to wait out in the hall as he and waffles stepped into the conference room, which he could immediately see why they called the warm room. It was less like a conference room and more like mission control. The room was large, lined on all sides with massive monitors which cast pale blue light down onto the large, elongated table with its holographic touch screen.

As soon as he walked in an entire room of officers stood from their seats.

“Commander!”

“Its good to see you, son.”

“We thought you were dead.”

“Earth is going to be happy to hear you’re alive.” He smiled and greeted the others with a firm handshake despite how tired he was, “It takes more than a wormhole to take a human out.” He said taking the seat offered to him near the head of the table.

Admiral Kelly had broken from her usual serious demeanor into a smile, “We are glad to have you back, Commandr. A lot has happened since you left.”

“Can I get a quick summary?”

“Well we learned that the balck hole, or I suppose wormhole now that we know, was created in part by the burg working with the voiceless kree. The voiceless have long been in conflict with the voiced and allied with the burg to turn our ire against the voiced. However, they pose no significant threat without burg technology and so we focused mostly on the burg. Your ship was of course, in pieces, but nearly all you crew survived as they were picked up by other ships in the near vicinity. You were pronounced MIA as was Dr. Krill. ONly three on your ship didn’t make it, and one of our ships was permanently crippled with over 50 casualties and 100 additional injuries.”

HE grimaced, but held back on the guilt for a moment.

“After that battle, the GA came to council, and war was declared on the burg. We sent in the GA armada and over 1000 shock troopers on to the face of the planet. While there a small team comprised mostly of your old crew discovered that the burg king was being imprisoned in a cavern below the throne room and allied with him to replace the queen with a successor.”

He had heard that part of the story , but it didn’t cease to amaze him.”

“Beyond that it was actually quite simple.”

“And my ship?”

“We will get to that in a moment, commander, but now its your turn.”

He nodded and sighed hand to his head, “Where to begin. Of course you know I initiated the shatter protocol when it seemed there was no possible escape for my crew. I stayed behind to initiate assuming, like you, it was a black hole. However, when I didn’t die and was shot out to some unknown location, it appeared as if it was a wormhole instead. I managed to crashland the command deck on the planet below, which was habitable. It was an alien world, but seemed rather…. Jurassic…. In nature. I managed to salvage the emergency kits from under one of the crew seats and survived for a week or two on the beach well fed and warm, however,while I was out in an attempt to boost a radio signal, I ran into some sort of alien creature which attacked me. The wounds I received were pretty bad, but I managed to kill it. I was losing blood fast and probably wouldnt have survived if the Omnidroids-”

“Wait, I’m sorry, the WHAT!”

“Sorry, sir, The omnidroids are what I nicknamed them because they look like something form an old movie. Think large ball with five big stumpy legs and a tiny head on toop.”

They nodded and he continued.

“Anyway, I ran into a group of them, and they helped with my sounds. I couldn’t understand them, and I am pretty sure their speech is in a much lower register because it was like listening to whales talk. Anyway, they brought me aboard one of their ships, and kept me there for a day or two. When we landed I was let out into an enclosure of some sort, turned out to be some kind of alien zoo.”

They stared at him.

He stared back.

“Your kidding?”

“No time for joking, commander.”

He shook his head, “I am not joking. I am serious, the enclosure that I was in had perfect temperature plenty of water and lots of food, but I could see other alien creatures outside the window and above me, just looking at me. Drones came in every now and again to feed me or clean the pen.”

They staired in silent awe.

“Anyway, from there I concluded it was likely they didn’t know I was sentient, so I determined that escape was possible if I let them think that. I started trying to figure out if I was being watched, and their response time if i was. Once tht was done I picked an appropriate time to escape, and used the iron eye armor I still had one from meeting with the Kree and pried open the bars before setting all of the other creatures loose. I found Dr. Krill on my way out, and we hijacked a shuttle.”

“How did you know how to get back?”

He shook his head, “I didn’t. But that was when the space dragon showed up.”

They stared at him again.

He held up his hands, “ I swear I am not making any of this up. That is exactly what happened It created some sort of wormhole and I ended up in the middle of a burg battle in space.”

“So there is an entire alien society separate from the one we already have.”

“It seems so?”

“And the shuttle?”

“It was handed over to GA scientists for examination and potentially reverse engineering.”

They nodded.

He waited for them to say anything else before.

“So…. my crew is safe but my ship?”

They shook their heads, “Is gone,” THey held up a hand to cut him off, “However it was actually a  stroke of good fortune as we have been building new ships for the fleet over the past few years, and one of them was close to completion. So, using the scraps leftover from your ship we were able to finish the job.” They leaned forward, “Commander, despite any issues we have had with your commanding in the past, we have determined that to judge you by the standards of the old military was a faux pax on our part. Space is new, and requires something from men that it hasn’t required before.”

He waited to see where this was going.

“The new armada will be nearly five times the size of the old. The captains as they are now will be promoted to fleet commanders and will be over their own unit of ships. The ship that the harbinger was recycled to make, is twice as big as your old ship with room for over 1000 crew members. It has the latest in alien and human technology and is the most advanced space vessel humanity has ever seen.”

It was an important reminder at this point not to pee himself out of excitement, so he kept his face stony, though he wanted nothing more than to jump around like a little girl squealing.

“However, since the captains would be promoted to fleet commander, that means that you will have to be promoted against as well.”

He paused.

“I… but I haven't been commander for all that long.”

“The UNSC fleet is growing at a rapid rate, and to keep up with it, we are going to have to adapt rapidly as well.”

“So, commander, do you accept?”

He paused and looked down at his hands, “I’m not moving to a desk job, sir.”

“No, no you won't. But you will be commanding a larger ship and thousands more people. Do you think you can handle that? He paused again looking down at his hands thoughtfully.

“Yes, I think I can.” 

[m34gs]

For that ship ask: 6, 7, and 9 for Ikkaku/Yumichika.

Thanks for the ask friend! (regarding this post) hehehe, I am so excited to answer these questions. I love Ikkaku and Yumichika as a ship, and these are some great ideas!

6. Single parent AU: Which one is the single parent? (Alt. if they’re both single parents: Which one is open to starting a new relationship from the start? Which one is never planning on finding love again… Until they meet the other and are instantly smitten?)

So, while I think that they both would be great parents, I think Ikkaku would be the one to be the single parent. Maybe he messed around a bit without thinking everything through and had a surprise baby with someone who wasn't interested in staying to raise the child, or maybe tragedy struck and his first love was taken away too soon. Either way, he now has this adorable little child, completely dependent on him. And damn it, he is gonna be the best dad. His kid is never going to want for anything, he will teach them how to fight, how to play, how to do everything they need. He isn't as good at some things, like cooking (I like to think he gets impatient and either undercooks things or turns the heat too high and burns everything), but he makes sure his kid gets the four food groups at every meal and snacks in between, even if it's pre-cooked or take out. (Which, in my opinion, there isn't anything wrong with those, and his kid is happy so Ikkaku is happy).

Ikkaku spends so much time doting on his kid that his friends worry about him, saying he still needs to take breaks and time for himself. Ikkaku is nervous at first (he would die before admitting it but he is worried about his kiddo), but he reluctantly lets someone (probably Orihime, who he is friends with through Ichigo) baby sit his little one and goes out to a pub with some friends to just have fun and relax. And damn if he doesn't see the most beautiful man he's ever met serving drinks and food to customers there. He's literally tonguetied. This man is so pretty, and he knows it. Lucky for Ikkaku, he is also a catch, and this man is bold. He slips Ikkaku a paper with his drink, and it has a name and a phone number on it.

They meet up a few times for coffee. Orihime is steadily becoming Ikkaku's number one baby sitter. (He trusted Renji once. Never again.) And Ikkaku is really into this guy. He doesn't have to pretend to be all tough, the guy, Yumichika, he gets it. He admires his strength, but also calls him beautiful and that is something Ikkaku is not used to hearing, but it definitely makes him blush. And he really enjoys his outings with Yumichika.

Then, comes the moment of truth. Ikkaku was open from the beginning about having a kid. He had to be. His kid is his world and he would never want to be with anyone who wouldn't love his child like their own. So Yumichika has been asking to meet his kid, and Ikkaku finally arranges it. He is more nervous than he was for the first date. He wants this to work so badly, but what if his baby is having an off day and acts shy or scared or throws a tantrum and scares Yumichika off? Or what if Yumichika is uncomfortable around children?

But then, Yumichika arrives. And Ikkaku introduces him to the kid. They stare at each other for a long time. Then Yumichika kneels down and offers a smile to the little one. The kid looks up at Ikkaku, who prompts him forward with a nod. So Ikkaku's child walks up to Yumichika and says, as is typical of children, the first thing on their mind, which is "can I wear colours on my face like you do?" (referring to his eye shadow and make up, which is of course flawless) and Yumichika is all for this. hell yeah. He says 'of course' and they spend the day doing make overs together, while Ikkaku watches them with a soft adoring expression he never shows for anyone else.

7. Doctor AU: Which one is the longsuffering doctor? Which one is the patient?

Yumichika is the doctor. He most definitely is. I think, he'd be a surgeon, maybe plastics? And Ikkaku is the patient. Ikkaku came into ER, severe work-related injury, needing immediate treatment, blood transfusion, and prophylactic antibiotics, the whole works. He got his leg crushed under machinery, there's blood and bone everywhere.

Once they get him stabilized, admitted, treated, and he's starting to heal, plastics is consulted. The top Plastic Surgeon, Yumichika Ayasegawa, is sent a referral, and he, of course, accepts, because he never turns down a challenge.

He finds Ikkaku attractive at first sight, but Yumichika is a professional. He would never date a patient. Instead, he focuses on his work, and does an amazing job. After about a year, Ikkaku's leg looks awesome and he's ready to be discharged from Yumichika's client list. Sure, there's scars (there always will be from an injury like that) but Ikkaku is highly impressed with Dr. Ayasegawa's work. And also his face.

Yumichika still wants to be careful. He may be in the same city, but he remains aloof and keeps his distance for a couple months afterward, but he can't help but flirt when he finally does see Ikkaku again, in the grocery aisle. Ikkaku is totally into this (the doctor has the most beautiful face he's ever seen!) and he ends up with Yumichika's number by the end of it.

9. Pirate AU: Who is the pirate? Who is the member of the royal family who did not sign up for this?

OOOOOH THIS! PIRATES! YES! HELL YES! THANK YOU FOR ASKING THIS ONE I LOVE PIRATES!!!

OK, ok, so. I have IDEAS. First, Ikkaku is totally the prince, first Prince of the kingdom and set to inherit the throne. Meanwhile. MEANWHILE. Yumichika is the King of Pirates. Yes. Yes. He is the most powerful pirate on the sees, with a notorious reputation for targeting any rich merchant or nobility he comes across on the seas. Ikkaku at first thinks this man must be fearsome and terrifying to look at, and he's a plague to the people. It makes his blood boil (and his heart race at the promise of a thrilling fight). He sets out on an expedition to hunt down this pirate king! But. When he finds the Pirate King, he is surprised (and entranced) by his beauty. And also a little confused, because even though Yumichika is beautiful and the Pirate King and says he loves to collect beautiful things, he doesn't seem to have retained a single piece of the wealth he stole. It's confusing, until Yumichika captures Ikkaku and brings him back to Yumichika's home island, where the wealth has been split among the people and shared. They are an island under the current king's rule, and they are heavily taxed to the point it is difficult to make any profit or survive. Yumichika shares all his spoils with them.

Ikkaku confronts him, demands to know why? Why, if Yumichika values beautiful things, is he giving wealth away? It doesn't make sense. Is this a set up to trap Ikkaku and manipulate him? And Yumichika just shakes his head at him and gestures to the people. "They're smiling," he says. "Is there anything more beautiful than a genuine human smile?" And that is when Ikkaku falls head over heels for this beautiful Pirate King.

Whew! This is a bit lengthy, but there you have it! I hope you enjoyed my answers and thoughts to those questions!! Feel free to ask more if you like, friend!

[pb-nj]

Let Me Take Your Hand, I'll Make It Right

Nico Kim/Levi Schmitt

Stress relief comes in many forms.

(hc inspiration from this post)

Warning: Racism

It's surprising the cases they've had lately at Grey Sloan. All of a sudden the most mundane injuries that people come to the ER for is down to nothing. They still had their influx of non covid patients, legitimate ones at least. Mostly food poisoning; weird but not surprising since people have gone into the trend of experimental baking during lockdown and the occasional injuries that happen when families get too bored in the house. 

He heard it before he actually saw it, a shout of an angered man and Levi rushes to the pit to check the commotion and he just came right at the time that his ex-boyfriend had been punched in the face by a distraught-looking man.

He saw Dr. Hunt and even Ben Warren coming to his aid but they were barely able to reach Nico before the blow was made. 

"I SAID NO CHINESE DOCTORS!" The man bellowed and tried to make another move towards Nico but Ben was able to pull him back and restrain him while Dr. Hunt had used himself as a barrier between Nico and the man. 

"Sir, calm down. This is a hospital and you are causing a disturbance. And you're not supposed to be in here, patients only." Dr. Hunt had one arm towards the man as he tried to reason with him. "Dr. Kim is not Chinese, he is negative from the virus and he is our only orthopaedic expert right now who can see your daughter's broken shoulder."

Levi checks the surroundings and indeed sees a teenage girl on a gurney, crying and clutching her injured arm. She was trying to get her father's attention, shaking her head hysterically but the man only kept staring daggers at Nico. 

"Exactly why I snuck in here! I saw that man attending to my daughter! Chinese, Asian, whatever! They're all the same! How can you keep people like THAT working in the hospital! They caused this virus and he still has the nerve to show up here?!" 

Levi exhales sharply and walks briskly to the nearest nurse station to check if security has been called, to his relief they've already called them as soon as they heard the man raise his voice. Levi looks back at Nico and his expression is merely blank, looking at the floor as if he's tuned everything out. He can see blood through his mask and some trickle from his brow, the exposed cheekbone is forming a nasty bruise, he's not gonna be surprised if his lip is cut too. 

The nurses nearest to the ruckus were too afraid to come near and so Levi took it upon himself to get something from the instruments cart that Nico can wipe his face with.

He walks quietly, closer to the scene and kneels by Nico.

"Here." he whispers softly, handing some tissues to Nico.

Nico startles and that seems to get him out of his daze, looking up at Levi and slowly takes the offered tissue. He slightly lower his mask and starts dabbing at his bloodied nose. Security came right at that moment and pulled the hollering man out of the pit, his daughter sobbing loudly.

Together with Dr. Hunt they helped Nico up, "Dr. Kim, go and get checked in one of the private rooms. I'll see if I can, uh, call Dr. Lincoln to step in for this girl. I wouldn't in normal circumstances but you're pretty bashed up. Please know it's nothing to do with what that man said. Go get yourself cleaned up and have some rest."

Nico merely nods and allows the nurses to help steer him out of the pit. Taryn comes in just in time, surprise on her face when she gets a glimpse of Nico and saunters to Levi, most likely to ask what happened. 

Levi could only rub his forehead as he retells the story and is halfway through when a nurse comes to disturb them.

"Dr. Schmitt, sorry to interrupt but Dr. Kim has asked for you in on call room 6. He doesn't want to be seen by anyone else." Taryn pointedly looks at Levi as he catches her eyes. 

"I'll take over here and.." she pauses, raising a finger towards Levi, "I'm only allowing this because he got sucker punched in the face. You... You better not wear your heart on your sleeve. Now go see what Asian Ken doll wants."

He gives her a small smile and thanks the nurse as he makes his way to the on call room. He grabs a first aid kit on the way just in case and knocks on the door before going in.

"Hi.. What are you doing in an on call room?You were supposed to be in one of the private rooms." Levi steps over to him and he was sitting up on the bed, mask off but was inspecting his injury on his phone. 

"You haven't been seen to?" Levi asks, pulling a chair over and puts the first aid kit on his lap. 

Nico shakes his head, putting his phone down and meets Levi's eyes. "No. I can only trust you." 

"Nico, the nurses are just as capable to tend to you, you know?" 

"I know just... Please?" He looks at Levi pleadingly and the resident can only sigh and nod. Taryn told him not to put wear his heart on his sleeve but how can he when the person he still loves is hurting.

"Okay." He opens the first aid kit and starts cleaning Nico's wounds and he was right, not only did he got hit on the side of his face and nose but his lip got cut but not too bad to require stitches. 

He could feel Nico looking at him, looking at his eyes as he works on the wounds. He tries his best not to flush but Nico's always had a strong look that can weaken his knees especially when he's looking at Levi. If Nico notices Levi's hands trembling he doesn't show it. 

Applying a small wound strip on his lip as the last part, he sits back and finally meets Nico's eyes. The fellow had never stopped looking at Levi the whole time.

"Are you okay?" He asks softly and knowing full well his question can be consider stupid after what happened, he still asks. 

Nico is silent for awhile, just staring into Levi's eyes before he lowers his gaze, clasping his fingers together.

"5th."

"Sorry, what? 5th?"

Nico nods, expression numb and his tone equally numb when he spoke, "5th.. He was the 5th person today to tell me not to go anywhere near them and the numbers go higher throughout the day. I've not only been counting patients I've lost but also patients who have rejected me. Patients who I attended before the pandemic and had to come in for emergency cases and rejecting me, asking for Link instead. Some end up agreeing when they're told Link is on paternity leave and some go home without being seen to. Saying they'll go to another hospital."

Levi's heart breaks right then and there and he can't imagine how much Nico's heart is breaking.

"Nico... I'm so sorry. I.. I never realised how much you've been going through." He takes a deep breath, raising his hand in an attempt to cover Nico's but stops himself midway. Nico noticed the gesture but doesn't move nor react. 

"I got used to it over time. People are scared, worried and they just want to stay alive."

"Yes but Nico they shouldn't be afraid of you. You are not the virus. You get swabbed every week and come out negative. You don't need to suffer silently."

"Levi, this hospital is already going through hell. If I can ignore the abuse I do. I treat who wants to be treated and those who don't want me I make sure I recommend them to the best orthopaedic surgeon in another hospital. It's part of the job."

"It's not, you know it's not.." Levi tries to argue but even he is at a loss of words. He doesn't know how to make this better, how to make people not be afraid of Nico. "Has this been going on for months?"

Nico nods but his expression doesn't change. Levi studies his face for awhile and he must admit it's been awhile since he's seen Nico without a mask on and just actually look at him without doing all the other things they've been doing normally in on call rooms. He misses these moments where they can just be and having each other's presence was enough to make everything right. 

"What can I do?" Levi says softly he isn't sure if Nico heard it especially with his mask still on. 

Nico slowly looks up at Levi and his face is showing like he's debating on something before he responds, "Stress relief."

Did Levi hear that right? He blinks a few times, shock evident in his eyes as he makes sure he heard it correctly.

"Stress relief? Stress relief as in.. now?" He must've looked comical,which is a success in itself since half of his face is covered, because Nico chuckles and smiles. 

That smile reached Levi's heart and he hasn't seen that smile in months. Even when fooling around lately he actually hasn't seen Nico's real smile. 

"Yeah stress relief." He's smirking now and Levi wonders how Nico Kim can still look hot smirking with bruised and bloody lips. 

"I mean.. Okay if that's your thing but you should really be resting."

"Can you sit next to me?" 

Levi raises a brow, putting away the first aid kit on his lap and placing it on a table. He moves to sit on the edge of the bed next to Nico.

"Did you get punched that hard? I mean should we ask for a CT?"

"Turn around."

"What? Nico are you okay? and like not feelings-wise but like in the head.. How many fingers am I holding up?" Levi waves a peace sign in front of Nico but the other just kept staring at him with a small smile on his face at Levi's antics.

"Turn around Levi."

Levi huffs and gives in turning around, his back now facing Nico. He nearly jumps out of his skin when arms wrap around his waist from behind and Nico touched his forehead to Levi's shoulder. 

His hands hang in the air awkwardly as Nico hugs him from the back, not really sure what to do until he hears soft sniffling from behind him and his heart breaks at the sound. He places one hand on the arms that seems to cling tighter and tighter and the other reaches back until he can pet Nico's hair carefully. 

He closes his eyes as he keeps hearing the sniffling and ragged breaths of Nico's cries and he too feels like he's gonna break down just from hearing it but he has to be strong. Strong for the person who he's known to only be strong and act strong. 

Levi allows Nico to cry it all out. He doesn't know if he's crying out the today or the past week, past months or perhaps he's crying out everything he's never cried out before but he knows they've been there for a long time like that because he could feel how stiff his body is from being in the same position for so long. It's a surprise no one has come looking for him but he guessed Taryn had something to do with it. 

Nico's hold finally relaxes and he leans back on the headboard again, not bothering to wipe his tears. He merely swallows thickly and closes his eyes. "Thank you, Levi." 

Levi turns around and this time he doesn't hesitate to place a hand on Nico's, "I can't make people change their prejudices but I can be here, I'm always here. For this kind of stress relief and the other." He grins sheepishly and it makes Nico open his eyes and chuckle at him.

"I miss seeing your whole face." He admits and once again Levi's heart soars. 

"Nico-..." He starts and of course he gets paged. They were bound to need him soon enough. "Page, non covid and all other residents have their hands full. I gotta go."

Nico merely nods, that soft expression still on his face. 

"Get some rest and just.. tell me, us, anyone.. If you need anything." He walks backwards, trying to keep Nico in his sight for as long as he can before he walks out the door. 

_

This was Levi's 7th devastating news to give out and this was the worst today. The patient was about to get married, they've made plans to have a small ceremony, just them and their parents and it was 4 days before the wedding when she started getting symptoms. She died and they didn't even know she was 4 weeks pregnant. Her fiance is practically on the floor sobbing, his mother holding him. Levi is just stood there, unable to do much. He stands there until the mother and son manages to get up and give him a quick thank you before leaving. 

He clutches his tablet to his chest, letting out a shaky breath and trying to keep from tearing up. He gets a message on his phone and it's.. it's from Nico.

Come see me. The usual.

He isn't sure what to make of it and he pockets his phone. He hasn't had a break yet and so can do with some while he goes to find Nico.

After that time Nico got punched, they've only come to each other for sexual relief. It's like Nico has cried out everything and is back to himself completely. They don't talk about that time and Levi doesn't allow himself to be confused by that time. He takes what he can from Nico and leaves it at that or so he makes himself believe but he's getting better at this purely physical thing. 

He makes it to their usual on call room and as soon as he opens the door he is already talking, "Look Nico I'm not in the mood. Can we do this another time?"

"I saw you just now.. Breaking the news to that family. Must've been hard." 

Levi is taken aback because he didn't see him around that time.

"I was just behind you, updating another family. You looked like you had an even harder time breaking the news to them."

"She.. She was pregnant and.. They didn't even know and they were supposed to get married in a few days." He shudders out a breath, hugging himself as he shares the news. 

"Okay." Is all Nico says before he turns around, back now facing Levi and oh... 

He knows he shouldn't and he knows they need to talk if they keep doing this for each other, being there for each other but right now he just needs this.. needs Nico. 

And so he wraps his arms around Nico's waist, rests his forehead on his broad back and cries, not even caring that he is now full on sobbing and Nico, he rests his hands on Levi's arms and eventually takes one of his hands and intertwine their fingers together as Levi keeps crying on him. 

They both know they're blurring the lines again and Nico isn't sure if he is ready for that. They're at the precipice where it may just go downhill if they make the wrong move.

But for now.. he holds Levi and lets him cry.

[julia-highstorms]

Last Night on Earth (Bryce x Rei (F!MC))

Summary: Infected by an unknown poison, Rei spends what could be her last night on earth with her most important person.

Author’s note: Open Heart is back which means BRYCE IS BACK and omg the angst in chapter 11 was on spot. As usual, I wanted to give a bit of more depth between Bryce and Rei’s relationship. Read more about them here

Song: Last Night On Earth - Green Day

Disclaimer: Characters and some dialogues belong to Pixelberry Studios.

Rating: PG-13

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x Rei Sato (F!MC)

Word count: +2.8K

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Rei left out a breath she didn’t know she was holding as she watched Ethan and June wheeling Rafael out through the decontamination room and down the hallway, solitary figures in a labyrinth of plastic. She had the sensation that her mentor took one last worried look over his shoulder to where she was. 

The silence that fell over was deafening, the pressure in her head felt too much. Now, all alone, she felt like she was the last person on Earth. She curled up on her bed and the tears came hard. She let them fall, hiding her face behind her hands, her frail and weak body quivering to the intensity of her weeping.

She cried for Danny, for Bobby, mourning the loss of those two souls. She cried for Rafael, scared of what could happen to him overnight. She cried for Kyra, fighting for her life at the O.R. She cried for herself. She felt scared of what fate had in store for her.

Working with medicine, she had to learn to endure that sometimes they were unable to save everyone. Death was part of life and a hospital staff dealt with it more often than most people would.

But she was scared either way. She was terrified. The feelings were overwhelming. Mourning, loneliness, anger, regret, helplessness, fear.

________________________________________

What it seemed to be much later, her friends and the diagnostics team arrived outside the window to her room. She felt tired, her eyes dry and puffy from crying so much.

She noticed Bryce standing behind Baz, staring at her with haunted eyes.

“How’s Kyra? The surgery must be over now…” “She’s fine. She’s resting. She, uh… we haven’t told her what’s happening with you yet.” - Rei nodded.

“Good idea.”

Sienna sniffed and buried her face in Jackie’s shoulder. The diagnostics team informed her that she had maitotoxin.

There was no cure for maitotoxin.

...She was going to die there.

Rei felt a wave of emotions all over again, feeling more helpless than she had ever felt. That was going to be her last night on earth.

Ethan told her to not give up yet. That was something so typical of her mentor to say and something she would usually be thankful for. If it hadn’t been for his tough love, she wouldn’t be the doctor she was today.

But today, right now, she wasn’t a doctor. She was just a dying being. He assured her that they’d synthesize an antidote overnight. Usually, she would believe and put faith in him. She trusted in Ethan Ramsey, and in June and Baz.

But that night she wasn’t feeling much hopeful. Even though Aurora came in with a group of doctors from Mass Kenmore. Even though Carrick affirmed that she wouldn’t die on their watch. Rei felt that she was already far from being saved.

Everyone said their goodbyes and followed June and Baz to the lab. Ethan stayed behind for a moment more, his pale blue eyes fixed on his favorite mentee, on the woman he was secretly in love, his face wrinkled with worry and something else. Fear. Regret. Longing.

“It isn’t over yet, Rookie.” - he said, and she smiled weakly at the nickname. - “You should try and get some rest.”

“What, are you my doctor now?” - she snapped back at him, good humouredly.

“Yes. I’m telling you as a doctor and...” - he hesitated, as if he tried to carefully choose his next words.

The head of the diagnostics team reminisced about the talk he had with Sienna on their way to a FBI field office earlier, where he confessed he had rather unprofessional feelings for Rei. But he didn’t tell Sienna the complete truth: although he had never really confessed to her, Rei knew about his feelings for her. At least, back then when she still was an intern. And Ethan was more than aware that her feelings for him weren’t mutual. She had rejected him. And he still pinned for her either way. And she could possibly die soon. Real soon.

He thought about throwing everything to the ceiling and fully confessing to her. How he still loved her. That might be his last chance.

...But that wouldn’t be fair. To Rei. A love confession from her boss and mentor was the least thing she needed right now. And it would be unfair to Dr. Lahela too. Whatever was the nature of their relationship, it was clear that Rei loved that scalpel jockey. And that, this time, the feelings were mutual.

The young surgeon was a few feet away, leaning against the wall, his hands buried inside his pockets, staring down at his feet, patiently waiting for his turn to talk to Rei. And Ethan was sure that he would possibly spend the rest of his night keeping her company. That was something she would want. 

“...as your friend.” - he finished his thought.

Rei nodded, smiling gratefully at Ethan, unaware of the storm of emotions he had inside him, and he left. 

She heard him exchanging a few words with someone who was behind the wall. Bryce came into view as he stepped to the side, lingering by the window. He forced a smile.

“It’s all gonna be okay, Rei. I promise. You heard Dr. Ramsey, they’re going to find a cure.”

“Bryce, you don’t have to pretend to be positive for my sake.”

The smile left his face.

“...I’m not. It’s for my sake. If I don’t stay optimistic, I’m gonna lose it. I can’t let myself do that. Not yet. Not while there’s still hope.”

“Okay. Whatever helps.” - she murmured, resting her head back into her pillow on her back. - “What did Ethan tell you?” “He asked me to take care of you.” - he frowned. - “You should try and sleep. You need to keep your strength up.”

“I don’t know if I can. I keep thinking about Raf… wondering how long he can hang on…”

Bryce looked down to his side, to the spare hazmat suit nearby, his brain working.

“...What if I stayed with you for a while? Would that help? There’s another hazmat suit out there.” - he smiled warmly at her. - “You know us scalpel jockeys. We’re beyond useless in the lab, anyway.”

That proposal seemed to bring a bit of life back into Rei, her eyes shining.

“Are you sure? What about Keiki? Will she be okay?”

“Keiki is a teenager, Rei, not a baby. She can take care of herself for a night. Besides, she forbade me of going home with you like this.” “Did you tell her…?” 

“Yeah. I said I’d be up late here. She told me to stay here with you. Keiki’s your number #1 fan, Rei.”

Rei chuckled softly and agreed on Bryce staying with her that night. A few minutes later, she heard the decontamination tent activating, and he entered her room.

“What do you think? Am I still handsome? Or am I somehow more handsome? Be honest.”

She laughed as Bryce strutted through the door in his bulky hazmat suit.

“It’s your best look yet. You should rock this every day.”

“Don’t tempt me, Rei.”

“I can’t believe you actually came in here.” - her voice dropped to a murmur.

“If I’m gonna be here for you, I’m gonna be here for you.” - he walked to her bed, standing up beside it and took her hand, squeezing it gently, as if to prove he was not a dream.

“I’m glad. I’m not doing so well in here on my own.”

“Not true, Rei. You’ve been incredible today.” “I haven't done anything but watch two good men die.”

He suddenly enveloped her in his arms. It was a good hug, even through the thick plastic suit.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” - he whispered into her ear and then Rei felt the tears back into her eyes.

She weakly circled her arms around him and sobbed. She looked so fragile.

“Bryce, I-- I’m scared.” - she confessed, hiding her face on his chest. He let her weep, his hands rubbing up and down her back in a comforting movement, saying nothing.

She was scared of not waking up in the morning. Of not being able to spend one more night at Donahue's with her friends. Of not knowing if Kyra had made it all after her surgery. Of not being able to see Bryce's smile ever again, or to feel his touch. She was scared that the last news their family would have of her was about her death.

“I know it wasn't my fault that this happened… but I still feel so full of regret. This might be last night on earth…”

“Hey, none of that. You need to stay positive.”

She brushed away her tears.

“Oh? Any suggestions on how to manage that?”

“I think we already established how incredible I look in this.” - he tried to give her a confident smirk. Rei smiled ruefully, her eyes red due to her crying.

“That’s… not quite doing it for me.”

“Fair. Then let’s focus on all the positive in you. What are you most proud of? What makes you happiest?”

“I definitely am most proud of my job.”

“As you should be. You’re a fantastic doctor, Dr. Sato.”

“And of working in the diagnostics team, although at first I didn’t intend to be part of it when we were interns.”

“I remember all the drama.” - it was almost funny how it seemed pettiless compared to what was happening now.

“And about what makes me the happiest… probably… You.” - she confessed, her cheeks blushing slightly.

“Now there’s a pleasant plot twist.” - Bryce grinned.

“Are you surprised?”

“Not really. I don’t want to make you feel like you’re not special, but I’m a lot of people’s reason for living.”

“You asked for my favorite thing, not my reason for living.” - she pointed out, smiling back at him. - “In light of the new framing, I’m changing my answer to ‘pictures of baby animals’.” - he laughed.

“That’s actually fair. I’ll allow it.”

They grinned at each other and, even filtered by the mask, the beauty of Bryce’s smile could still almost blow Rei away.

“Gosh, you’re pretty.” - she murmured, adoration in her eyes. But to her surprise, his smile faded. - “Bryce? Did I say something wrong?”

“No. I just… Rei, I really am trying to stay positive. We both have to. But…” - he hesitated.

“But what?”

The truth was that Bryce was desperately trying to keep his cool. He somehow managed to do it at the operating room, but now, seeing Rei so terrified, feeling so helpless…

And even though she was the one in that situation, unsure of her fate, Rei Sato still was able to comfort him. To check on him, to make him feel like the most amazing person in the whole world.

He loved her.

He felt his heart clutching inside his chest and out of breath, a lump in his throat.

“You mean a lot to me, Rei. More than you know, probably. The idea of losing you…” - he trailed off, shaking his head ruefully, unable to finish his sentence.

Rei could see a sadness in his eyes as he gazed back up at her, but also something more… that something that made her heartbeat speed up.

“Bryce, you mean a lot to me too. As a friend, and as more…” - she murmured, her cheeks turning a bit redder and less pale.

“Yeah?” - he asked, as if he couldn’t believe his own ears.

“Yeah. I don’t know what waits for me tomorrow… Hell, I don’t even know if I’ll get a tomorrow. But if tonight’s my last night on earth, then you’re the one I want to spend it with.”

“Well, damn, Rei. Talk about bittersweet.” - he smiled, his eyes glistening with the tears that threatened to fall.

“Let’s focus on the sweet part.”

She gently took his gloved hands and led him to the bed, too small for them both, especially with his suit, but they didn't care.

"Would you hold me?"

"I'd love to, Rei." - he curled around her, spooning her tightly from behind. She always felt safe whenever she was in his arms.

"I wish I could feel your skin."

"You will."

"I wish I could kiss you."

"Sorry, was I mumbling? You will, Rei. You're going to get through this." 

"It's nice."

"What?"

"Hearing a doctor tell you this. It almost makes you believe that it will really be okay." - Rei swallowed another fresh wave of fear.

"What is it?" - his voice sounded worried.

She turned to face him, the tears welling up on her eyes again.

"What if the inside of this hospital room is the last place I see? What if…"

"Hey, don't go there." - he said, brushing off the hair out of her face. She took a deep breath.

"I need a kiss." - he smiled, amused by her request.

"How do you want to manage that one?"

"With a lot of imagination, I guess?"

Smiling softly, he lifted her fingertips in his hand, bending over them to 'kiss' her through the mask. Rei couldn't feel the softness of his lips, but a tingle of warmth shot through her nonetheless.

"How was that?"

"Better than I expected, honestly."

"Good."

His arms tightened around her. She laid still, enjoying the strength of his embrace until, at last, sleep clouded the edges of her mind.

"I'm glad I at least got to hold you one last time��"

"It's not the last time, Rei. I promised." - she heard Bryce say as she drifted off to a restless sleep.

________________________________________

The hours passed slowly, but Bryce didn't dare to close his eyes, afraid of losing her. Rei's weak breathing was the only sound in the room. Her body would squirm occasionally and low whimpers would escape her lips as the pain would hit her. He would brush off a strand of hair away from her face, her skin feeling both clammy and cold through his glove.

Much later, when the sun was already up the next morning, Bryce still found himself with Rei. He was now in the chair right next to her bed.

She woke suddenly to a stabbing pain in her midsection. She clutched her stomach, gasping at the intensity.

"It's okay, Rei. You're okay." - he rubbed her back soothingly, his voice comforting.

She gave in, riding the wave of pain until it passed. When it was over, she lied back down the bed, feeling weaker than ever, breathing hard. She gazed listlessly at the window just as her friends hurried up.

"Rei! We did it!" - she heard Aurora's voice and blinked at the blurry shapes of people in the window.

"Huh?"

"Seriously? You guys found an antidote?" - Bryce asked, immediately standing up.

"Something like that." - Carrick smirked confidently. 

Rei took a shuddering breath, trying not to hope too hard. Ethan, June and Baz came swimming into focus as they entered her room. They looked exhausted, but there was a glint of hope in their eyes.

"How?"

Ethan explained, a smile on his tired face. They hoped it would keep the maitotoxin from progressing any further. They had already administered it to Rafael, but there hadn't been any change of his condition so far, neither for worse nor better. 

Well, it was better than nothing. It was the only shot she had anyway.

"Give me your arm, Rei." - she presented her arm, barely able to hold it up. Bryce promptly cradled her, holding her arm still as Ethan prepared the injection. - "Ready?"

She smiled back at him.

"Ready."

He smoothly inserted the needle into her vein and dispensed the serum.

"And now we wait… and hope." - June concluded.

________________________________________

The next several hours passed in a slow, anxious crawl. Bryce had to go back to work, as well as all of her friends. Every hour, June would come by to test Rei's blood.

Slowly, her blood pressure started to stabilize. Eventually, the nausea receded. The world swimmed back into shaper focus, until…

"It worked!" - Bryce announced, loud and clear.

"Seriously? I'm cured?"

The young surgeon strode through the decontamination tent on his scrubs, with a megawatt smile that told her everything she needed to know.

"I told you it was going to be okay. I told you-- Unf!" - she printed across the room and into his arms so hard it nearly bowled him over. - "Couldn't you wait for me to cross the room, huh?" - he asked, looking down at her, enjoying the sensation of her arms hugging him tightly, her body against his.

She shook her head, a broad smile on her lips, her dark eyes shining with happiness, full of life.

"Nope."

Rei grabbed the front of his scrubs and pulled him into a dizzyingly deep kiss. Bryce immediately responded, kissing her back as if there was no tomorrow. But today was tomorrow.

"Thank you." 

"For what?"

His arms wrapped around her, holding her close, both of them savouring the warmth and solidity of each other's body.

"For being alive." - he whispered, leaning down to kiss her temple.

Rei laughed, happy and feeling more alive than ever, and they held each other for a moment more. 

________________________________________

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