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tvwebs · 1 day ago
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Excuse me? Oh no
Part 1 - curiosity
platonic!yandere!batfam x reader
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Warnings: this was made with MALE reader in mind but please interpretate the gender however you like, the reader here is minor coded but no confirmed age, invasion of privacy, out of character depictions, this is a joke fic but taken seriously, mentions of kidnapping, no beta we die like jason
Dividers by aquazero
(this is a series) part one (your here) , part 2 , part 3, part 4
PLOT: you were given a phone, but your "family" can't help but feel nosy about your own privacy
You hate it here. There was no doubt to that, you have been held hostage by the Wayne's for a couple of months now and it was terrifying AND somewhat annoying. You don't these guys, you haven't met them until like when you were kidnapped, it was horrible.
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They promised you can have boundaries, they broke those, privacy, you don't know they don't actually allow that, you felt like they were trying to be as considerate to you as possible for you to stay and you can't help but be in sort of awe, they are your kidnappers and despite their possessive and terrifying tendencies you felt like they geniuely cared for you (you didn't even wanna be here), so to cope with this situation you do what other people do- staying on social media.
Bruce gave you a new phone a few weeks ago and you have been obsessively using it so you could feel you have security again, not ideal nor healthy but hey, what else is there? You found a way to log in into your old Tumblr and/or Wattpad account, obviously you were trying to hide th fact from the bat family, you would be lectured for hours! So you tried to keep it in a down low, removing every search, hiding apps, deleting shit is saddening but it's for your safety and security.
Damian. He was the first to notice you spending much more time on your phone recently and as the little as he is, he tries peeking behind on what your doing but can't see clearly but he sees words? No texting- what is it your reading? "What is that?" He asked with a raised eyebrow and weirdly stern tone of voice, you flinched and quickly existed the app "o-oh! nothing." You are horrible at lying when it comes to Damian, he makes you feel.. uneasy.
Damian wasn't convinced as expected and he tries to grab the cellular device in your hand and with your idiotic instincts you slapped his hand away, he gasps and he turns irritated. That wasn't your best move. "How could you? All I want is to make sure you're safe and this is how you react?!" He huffs and now you're scared, like they are always so unpredictable when they are mad.
"i-im sorry." You apologized, you wish that Damian doesn't convince Bruce to put you back in the white room. It was torture, Damian scoffs and walks away, you were left shaking, what happened just now..? You just went back reading a stupid FNAF fic to calm your nerves (you are such a weirdo)
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It was dinner time, you were eating in the so called "room" you were in everyday, Bruce said you weren't ready to eat at the dinner table, whatever that means. Alfred bought you your food, you thank him and he left, is the grandpa okay?
As you eat you listen in the conversation in the dinner table, "When will we ever have them eat over here?" Seemingly to be Dicks voice, he was the one that seemed to be the most clingy to you. "When they are ready." Bruce said to him in a stoic tone. You continue to listen in..
"Father, there's something I feel that needs your attention." Damian announces, oh no what is he going to do? Bruce perks his attention to Damian with the 'hm?' sound. "I feel that Y/N is hiding something from us. Just today they slapped my hand away when I asked." He said recalling the event from earlier.
Tim who was also here (don't forget him) looks confused "like what?" He asked, Damian always seemed so dramatic about you to Tim, Damian gave an annoying sigh "Their phone! They might be hiding something in their phone!" He shouted, "they shouldn't be keeping secrets from us, were family!" He continued to argue
Oh god.
"Damian calm down, I will handle this little situation later, if they are hiding something they aren't supposed to they are going back to the white room." Bruce exclaimed and/or added.
"Doesn't that seem a bit extreme Bruce?" Jason teased with a smirk in response with Bruce's statement, Jason may present himself as the most normal and gives you a lot of freedom but he is just as controlling and possessive as the others.
"of course not, it's for their own good." Jesus Christ he is so ominous and cryptic. This is the same guy that is seen as a good billionaire?, the family continue to eat and banter
While they were eating, you were stuck in a position, when Bruce mentioned the "white room" you don't wanna go back, you don't wanna go back. That place was awful. Your privacy is not valued.
They don't care about you, they just think they do. what can you even do?
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ladykailitha · 3 days ago
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The Hellfire Exotic Club Part 14
Here we are again at the end. I'm sad to see this one go. It was a real challenge to see if I could write heavier smut and the answer is "eh, so-so". There should have been more nudity and sex in this thing than there was, but after the fight with Tumblr over the stripper tag I just gave up trying to even tag things properly anymore. Because of the fucking purity police.
But this gets racy. As racy as I get.
So thanks for one hell of a ride!
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13
~
Steve flopped on their sofa with a whine. “Robin... dancing with him just the two of us is going to kill me. I just know it.”
Robin looked over at him from the kitchen with an impressed eyebrow. “You know who to blame.”
“Chrissy,” they said together.
“If she had been dating you,” Steve huffed, laying lengthwise on the sofa and putting his right arm behind his head, “this wouldn’t have happened.”
“Hey!” she protested. “There is no way that that literal goddess is ever going to date a peon like me.”
Steve lobbed a pillow straight at her head. “Only one of us gets to mope at a time, and it’s my turn. Plus you aren’t a pee-on or whatever it was you called yourself. I bet she thinks you’re hot.”
Robin came over with the two bowls of stew she had reheated and handed one to Steve, who promptly sat up straight so she had a place to sit.
“There is no fucking way,” she huffed around a bite of carrot. “Did you see the way she danced with the new Wrath? Micaela has all the right moves, who would want me when they could have that?”
Micaela looked like a Greek statue come to life. She perfect olive toned skin, deep brown eyes and the perfect pout to her lips. She was also married to a guy named Paul, who did construction for a living and didn’t care about the stripping as long as it made her happy.
“I’m pretty sure Paul would take issue with that,” he huffed. “Besides, I’ll make a bet. I’ll ask her tomorrow if she thinks you’re hot and when I win, you have to do laundry for the next month.”
Robin shrieked in outrage. “There is no way, Mr. Clothes Horse that I am going to wash that many clothes for a month.”
“Oh so you agree,” Steve said batting his eyelashes, “that you know she thinks you’re hot?”
She began sputtering and squawking, finally she settled down with her stew and very mumbled, “Curses foiled again.”
Steve kissed her cheek and turned on “Unsolved Mysteries”.
“This show was creepier in the eighties,” she huffed. “Now most of the time it’s just supernatural shit. Robert Stack would appalled.”
Steve waved her off, “Shush! I want to hear about the Chicago Moth Man.”
~
Steve bounded up to Chrissy the next day, grinning from ear to ear. “Hey-ya, hot stuff!”
Chrissy threw her head back and laughed. “What’s happening, yourself, you goober?”
“So...” he began, rocking back on his heels and then back on his toes, “so I have this bet with Robin. If I win she has to do the laundry for a month and if she wins, I have to tell Eddie I like him.”
“Oohh,” Chrissy said, rubbing her hands together, “I almost want to see you lose so you have to tell him. What’s the bet?”
“That you don’t think she’s hot. I said you do, she thinks you don’t.”
Steve smirked as he saw the complete indecision warring on her face. “Damn it.” She stomped one foot dramatically. “That’s really not fair, Steve...”
His grin widened and he knew he had won. “I’ll tell you what, you let me win the bet and I’ll have you help choreograph a dance that will knock all of Eddie’s clothes right off.”
“Tell Robin that not only do I think she’s hot,” Chrissy said returning his grin, “but also tell her to be ready next Tuesday at seven, because I’m taking her out on a date.”
Steve gave her a fist bump and walked away, back to where a very anxious Robin stood, twisting a cloth napkin to death.
“I win,” he said smugly, “and you have a date on Tuesday at seven. Dress nice, but not fancy.”
Robin sputtered and stammered. “I would have thought at the very least she would have gone my way if for the very reason one of you to boneheads needs to say something because even long time regulars are starting to notice the friction between the two of you will light this place on fire.”
“Oh I totally bribed her,” Steve said, smirk never faltering for a moment, “I told her she could help choreograph a dance to actually seduce Eddie.”
“You are so smug,” she said through gritted teeth, pinching his cheek. “I don’t have anything to wear, you know this right?”
Steve waved her off, smacking her hand away. “Go on a shopping trip, it’s not like you’re broke. Hell, we’ll go tomorrow before work. Make you the prettiest butch lesbian there ever was.” He patted her cheek firmly. “Now, I’m going to go shake my ass.”
He walked off as Chrissy walked up to her. “Hey, gorgeous,” she purred, “I’m assuming Steve told you about our date?”
Robin nodded, eyes wide. “I didn’t know you thought that about me.”
Chrissy leaned over the counter, putting her boobs on display. She played with one of Robin’s many necklaces. “I thought that when you got hired, sweetie. This is just me finally taking the plunge.”
She licked her lips slowly as Robin’s cheeks turned bright red, causing her freckles to really stand out.
“Oh.”
Chrissy chuckled. “Such a pretty little thing. I think you have me a disadvantage, Robin.”
“How’s that?” Robin asked, amazed it didn’t come out as complete gibberish. Her cheeks were flushed and she couldn’t even see straight, every fiber of her being was focused on that single point of contact where Chrissy had a hold of her necklace.
“You’ve seen me naked and covered in chocolate sauce,” Chrissy purred, “and I was curious to see if that was on offer.”
How Robin didn’t immediately devolve into a complete buffoon, she had no idea. “Never on the first date.” She almost squeaked when she realized the words that had just come out of her mouth. That’s it. This wasn’t Hellfire Club, this was Heaven. She had died. Clearly.
“Duly noted,” Chrissy said, straightening up. “You’ll be a good girl for me, won’t you?”
Robin nodded and Chrissy waved goodbye over her shoulder. Joe who was the head waiter and her boss patted her on the shoulder.
“Don’t take it too personally,” he said with a huff of laughter. “I’ve seen lesser lesbians turn into gibbering hound dogs when she does that. She’s just a softy, really, she just also loves to blue screen the hell out of potential dates.”
Robin turned to him. “Why is that?”
“Because she wants to set the expectation that she is a stripper,” Joe said with a shrug. “She’s good at her job and she isn’t going to quit for anyone. So if she goes super sexual out of the gate and the person doesn’t mind it, then she knows it’s a safe bet.”
“Oh.”
That made more sense than it didn’t. But now she had figure out how to date the hottest woman Robin had ever met. No pressure.
Right?
~
To say Steve was nervous would be an understatement. He was about to turn an already sexually charged dance between him and Eddie and turn the dial all the up to eleven. He’s not even sure if it could be called “simulated” sex, when they were both going to get naked for a crowd, but it was definitely going to be something.
He had been slowly ramping up the tension between him and Eddie with each week and it was the last Saturday of the month and he was about to blow something. Eddie’s mind or his fucking job.
He really, really hoped it wasn’t his job.
They did their trio dance and Lilith slunk off stage, leaving behind Lucifer and Samael. The looks they were giving each other could have set that stage on fire. Steve was already most of the way red and his wings were tattered. It would not take much for Samael to fall. And fall tonight, he most certainly would.
Steve started out slow. He wanted to make Eddie come to him. He ran his hands all up and down his chest. One hand went up to his throat while the other dipped to press the heel of hand against his aching erection.
The moaned he released was not faked.
Both hands touched his cheeks and then dug into his hair, his hips thrusting out. The audience was hooked but the person he wanted was Eddie.
Lucifer watched with hooded eyes as Steve made love to himself. Then the water fell on Steve’s head and he ripped off his top. The wings were skeletal now, the last bit of feathers having been washed away with all the white.
He was standing there in red boots and g-string, head back and chest out.
The growl from Eddie was primal and Steve wasn’t sure if it was Lucifer or Eddie who made the sound.
But it didn’t matter, it did the job.
Eddie stalked across the stage and pulled their bodies flush together. He lifted one of Steve’s legs up and unzipped the boot, gently pulling it off. That leg went tightly around Eddie’s waist and he did the same with the other leg.
Soon Steve was only wearing the g-string, completely wrapped around Eddie, who was still fully dressed.
With his hand firmly on Steve’s back, Steve lowered himself backwards, arching his back, like those Renaissance painting of fallen angels and deposed saints.
With his free hand Eddie ripped off the harness with the wings tossing them aside to be picked up by one of the other dancers. Then that hand slid over Steve’s chest, down to the front of Steve’s thong and ripped that off as well.
The gasp from the audience and then the roar when Eddie tossed at them was loud.
Not that Steve could hear them over the rush of blood to his head. He wasn’t sure if it was entirely due to hanging upside down or the fact that the only thing that separated him from Eddie was the leather pants he wore as Pride.
Steve wrapped both arms around Eddie’s neck and began to grind against him.
Eddie forcibly set him down and pushed him away.
Steve had nothing to worry about because he knew this was part of the dance and turned toward the patrons.
He danced, reveling in his now naked form, showing off and simpering to the crowd. Then he’s yanked back, into Eddie’s arms.
He smirked and pushed Eddie away, turning back to the crowd. Eddie yanked on his arm again but instead of pulling him close, he pushed him to ground.
Steve stared up at him, propped up on his elbows as he scooted away from Eddie, toward the edge of the stage.
Eddie pulled on his tear away leather pants, leaving him only in the black combat boots he wore.
He stood, straddled over Steve and then knelt on one knee, running his hands over Steve’s torso and then pushed him all the way to ground.
Steve’s arms came up and his hands roamed over Eddie’s legs and ass. Eddie’s other knee hit the stage with a loud thump, causing the audience to jump. They were that enthralled with what was going on on stage.
Eddie slithered down Steve’s body and they both moaned together.
Steve was no longer sure where his body ended and Eddie’s started. It was like they were one.
Eddie stood up and as he straightened, he flipped Steve so he was on his stomach. He knelt back over Steve’s prone body and lifted his head by his hair. Steve knew to rise with it so it didn’t actually hurt, but fuck it was sexy as hell.
And the crowd thought so too.
Steve rose on his arms, stretching his back, like a mermaid pose, head back. Then he went straight down again slapping the stage to make it sound harder than it was.
He rolled over and looked up at Eddie. Eddie beckoned him to him and Steve followed, hypnotized. Entranced.
They danced together, their bodies moving as one.
Then with the dying beats of the song, Eddie dipped Steve, kissing him firmly on the mouth.
The audience went...well wild was too tame a word. Feral. They went absolutely feral.
Someone handed them garters for them put on and get money stuffed into. Once all the money that was stuffed the garters and thrown on the stage was gathered up, Steve and Eddie stumbled into Eddie’s office/dressing room.
Mouths and hands everywhere as they tried to touch as much as possible. As they were already naked or mostly there all it took was a quick tumble onto the sofa and they were really going at it.
“Baby,” Eddie huffed. “I was so hard, I almost came twice.”
Steve moaned underneath him. “Only twice? God if I didn’t have an ex-boyfriend who liked edging me I would’ve come several times.”
Eddie propped himself up on his elbows to look Steve in the eye. “We going to unpack that later when we are both sane again, but for right now I need to see you come!”
“Deal!” Steve cried as Eddie ground down.
The sex was short and explosive, as they had been turned on pretty much from the get go.
Eddie collapsed against Steve’s cum covered chest causing him to let out a pained huff.
“Where the fuck did you learn to dance like that?” Eddie complained. “Have you been holding back on me?”
Steve chuckled. “I had Chrissy help choreograph that in exchange for getting her a date with Robin.”
“That sneaky little minx,” he said with a fond shake of his head. “She is in so much trouble for that.”
“Hey,” Steve protested. “It worked didn’t it?”
There was silence for a beat.
“It did work, right?” he asked shyly.
Eddie raised his head to look him in the eye. “I guess that depends on your end game, if I’m honest.”
“I’m in love with you, Eddie,” Steve said his voice shaking just a little with the raw emotion of it all. “I want to take you dates, I want to wake up next to you, I want to know how you take your eggs so I can make you breakfast in bed. I want it all, with you.”
Eddie sat up and pulled Steve with him. “I want that too. I’m love with you, too. I’ve always been attracted to you. You’ve been nothing but kind to Chrissy, you defended my club against Nancy and Jason, you made it possible for me to really turn this club into something really special. It was good before you came, but you made it great. Of course I want to be your boyfriend, Stevie. I’d be upset if you didn’t want that, too.”
Steve surged forward and kissed him firmly on the lips. “Okay.”
Steve really didn’t feel like walking through the throng of people waiting to get paid, so Eddie loaned him some clothes.
When Eddie opened the door everyone cheered.
“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie huffed. “Just remember I’m still your boss. Speaking of which, let’s get you people paid.”
Jeff and Chrissy came forward the locked box and the tip jar. Eddie counted the money, but instead of Steve on the other side of the desk like he used to do, Steve sat on the corner of the desk watching Eddie work.
After everyone had gotten paid they all shuffled out except Robin, Chrissy, and Jeff.
“Nice to see you two finally worked it out,” Jeff said with a huff of laughter. “I was about to embarrass the hell out of Eddie if something didn’t change by tonight.”
Eddie shuddered. “Glitter and stickers. So many stickers.”
Jeff grinned broadly.
Robin handed Steve a bag. “This has all your stuff in it, like your clothes, wallet, cell phone, and keys. I don’t want to see you home until sometime tomorrow.” She cocked her head to the side. “Mainly because I’m making out with my girlfriend tonight and really don’t want you there.”
She winked at him and then grabbed Chrissy’s wrist and hauled her out of there. Chrissy squawked and wave goodbye, yelling her congratulations over her shoulder as she was dragged along.
“And that’s me out of here, too,” Jeff said jutting his thumb at the retreating pair. “I’ll catch you guys tomorrow.”
Once everyone was gone, Steve smiled down at Eddie.
“Tomorrow,” he said wistfully. “I like the sound of that.”
“I like the sound of an infinity of tomorrows,” Eddie replied.
“Me too.”
They kissed again and walked out to their cars. Steve followed Eddie to his apartment, and just like in the rest of Eddie’s life, just never really left.
Soon he was spending most of his time over there, sometimes for sex, but mostly just being himself.
One Tuesday night when they were curled up on the sofa, Eddie asked him to move in for real.
“I’d really like that,” he murmured against Eddie’s lips.
Steve thought back to that fateful day when Robin came home from getting the job at the club, telling him that a dancer position just opened up and they were desperate. He hadn’t really stripped in a long time, the stripper-cize classes excluded. Those really weren’t the same thing as actually stripping.
But money was running out and he was out of options. So he auditioned using that silly song, hoping to stand out just enough to get the job.
And it instead changed his life.
“I love you, my little devil,” Steve purred.
Eddie’s returning smile was blinding. “And I love you too, angel.”
They kissed happily in their ever after.
~
Tag List: STORY COMPLETE!
1- @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog @gloomysoup @micheledawn1975
2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji @garden-of-gay
5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman
7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth
8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss
9- @dreamercec @sadisticaltarts @too-much-tma-stuff @dolphincliffs @chameleonhair
10- @themoonagainstmers @novelnovella
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whatatime2balive · 1 day ago
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It's (Not) My Right To Be Hellish
Pairing: Caitlyn x Vi
(A/n: I made this fic last night and completely forgot to post it to my tumblr account. I will post the ao3 link right after this.  I found out that the creator of Arcane had a headcanon that Vi had a prison wife and I was like "what if I used that in a fic to cause problems!" Alright, so this essentially takes place after the battle act 2 in season 2. We're just pretending that some random magical occurrence stopped the fight early and both sides had to retreat with minimal casualties. Also this is post heartbreaking apology from Caitlyn so her and Vi are friends again. I have not seen act 3 yet so this is all merely under the assumption of everything I know now. Anyways, I love jealousy fics so please enjoy and let me know what you think!)
Vi feels dead on her feet, which is a rather common occurrence these days. As she walked alongside Caitlyn and Maddie, she began replaying the past few weeks in her head as she usually does no matter how hard she tries to ignore it. The battle against Ambessa ended before it even really began. After Isha shot that gun into the air, a massive earthquake broke out which completely destabilized the surface everyone was standing on. It didn't matter what side you were fighting for, everyone immediately fled to get to safety. Honestly, Vi thinks it's a blessing in disguise.
Vander's condition is still up in the air, but they're holding out hope he will pull through. Isha was badly injured from the blast, but they managed to get her to a hospital before the kid went beyond the point of no return. Poor girl can't stay conscious for more than ten minutes, but she's stable and the doctors said she will only improve from here. Jinx hasn't left Isha's side once since she was hospitalized.
And Jinx, well, it's so beyond complicated. As of right now, her and Caitlyn managed to find it in themselves to call a truce until Ambessa is no longer a threat. They're civil for now, so Vi's content.
The only thing that's significantly changed for the better is Vi's relationship with Caitlyn. After everyone fell back, Caitlyn pretty much broke down and apologized so many times that Vi lost track. Vi was hesitant to put any trust in her, even after the battle against Ambessa. It was more of a temporary team up than anything in her eyes.
But Caitlyn sure as hell made it her mission to prove herself. She's already jumping in and allocating resources back to Zaun to improve their quality of life even though it's only been three weeks since the battle. Seeing how invested Caitlyn is in helping the lives of the citizens in Zaun made Vi open up back up to her and before she knew it, it was like no time had passed at all between them. They were friends again.
The problem is that friends are all they would ever be.
Once the two girls reconciled, Caitlyn told Vi that her and Maddie slept together a couple of times in those four months they weren't on speaking terms. It's like someone took a knife to the Zaunite's chest and tore it open. That was Caitlyn's polite way of saying the kiss she shared with Vi was a one off thing that wouldn't happen again.
The minute Caitlyn finished telling her about the situation with Maddie, Vi had immediately cut her off and said that was perfectly fine. She physically did not think she could stand hearing a verbal rejection from Caitlyn, so Vi merely insisted it was no big issue and changed the subject. Vi can't even blame Maddie, who wouldn't fall in love with Caitlyn?
Even after everything that happened between them, the brawler is still a pathetic lovesick fool over that damn sharpshooter. But now that Caitlyn sincerely apologized and is actively righting her wrongs? Damn, Vi really wants to make out with her.
Yet, she can't. Maddie is the one dating Caitlyn, not Vi.
Vi can't even find it in herself to hate Maddie. As a matter of fact, she became rather fast friends with the shorter woman. Maddie's a sweet girl that's been pushing for peace since the first day she clocked in as an enforcer. She doesn't judge Vi for her past in Stillwater like many other enforcers do and she makes great company since Caitlyn's spent most of her time drowning in work as of late.
At the end of the day, it was probably for the best. Maddie's the kind of girl that can hang on Caitlyn's arm without people watching them in disdain. Since Vi gets more and more pathetic by the day, she will take any small morsels of friendship Caitlyn will offer her.
Even if it hurts, Vi really is just grateful to have that damn unhinged mongoose in her life. Just being friends would be enough. It had to be. Though it certainly doesn't help that Vi essentially moved in with Caitlyn until she can find a place of her own. It doesn't seem to bother Maddie, so Vi's been trying to keep an appropriate distance between herself and the Piltover girl.
Life isn't perfect. Far from it. But Vi has hope now. That is so much more than she could have said one month ago.
Today was beyond draining. She's so fucking exhausted, it was probably a mistake to agree to going out tonight. But, well, Maddie insisted that the two of them along with Caitlyn should get a couple drinks at a nice bar to take a bit of the edge off. Vi's pretty sure there's not enough alcohol in all of Piltover to get all her edges off, but she supposed relaxing even a little bit is progress.
So here Vi is, walking at Caitlyn's right while Maddie is strolling on the tall woman's left as they venture to the bar Vi can't even remember the name of. Vi was snapped out of her inner musings when Maddie lightly tapped her on the shoulder.
"Earth to Vi? You in there?" Maddie softly asked.
"Yeah, sorry, I totally zoned out for a hot minute. What were you saying?" Vi asked apologetically.
"I was saying how excited I am to take a breather. It feels like everything around us has only been getting more and more stressful. A chance to unwind is going to do us all some good," Maddie confidently told her.
"Especially you, Vi. Every time I see you, your brows are furrowed," Caitlyn giggled.
To prove her point, Caitlyn lightly dragged her finger against the middle of Vi's brows to smooth out the creases. Vi didn't even know she was furrowing her brows at all. Caitlyn gently stroked the spot a couple more times and Vi could already feel herself start to lean into the touch. How the hell is she so pathetic that the smallest form of physical contact makes her melt?
"What can I say Cup- oh shit I'm dying," Vi hastily blurted out while pretending to cough.
Calling Caitlyn cupcake is a habit Vi is trying really hard to break. She's seen Maddie look upset a couple times when Vi uses the nickname, so out of respect for their relationship, she's been trying to stop. Vi totally gets it. She knows if she were Caitlyn's girlfriend, another girl giving her some cutesy nickname would piss Vi off to no end.
"You alright Vi?" Maddie frowned.
"Yeah, managed to choke on air somehow. I'm just special that way," Vi lied.
At least she caught herself before saying the full nickname. Vi was about to say something else when a feminine voice behind them started to speak.
"Well I'll be damned. If it isn't inmate 516, roaming free once more," the soft voice laughed.
With absolutely zero hesitation, Vi grabbed the shirts of the two enforcers and dragged them into the alleyway that was conveniently right next to them.
"Get your guns out now," Vi hissed.
Caitlyn already had her rifle pointed before Vi could even finish the sentence. Maddie took a split second before following her boss's lead.
"Who on Earth is that?" Maddie whispered quietly.
"Admittedly, I don't know. But they called me by my prison number and everyone in Stillwater absolutely despised me. Not to mention the fact that anyone who's ever known me has tried beating my ass at least once. Better not chance it," Vi whispered back.
"Oh c'mon Babe, do you really not recognize me? I'm hurt, truly," the voice giggled.
Vi's eyes widened and she stepped out of the alleyway, ignoring both Caitlyn and Maddie's protests. Only one woman has ever called her babe.
"Holy shit. Sarah?" Vi asked with wide eyes.
The figure right before her is wearing a cloak covering her face. Then she pulled it back to confirm Vi's suspicions. Standing right in front of her is Miss Sarah Fortune in the flesh.
"Miss me Babe? I know I missed you," Sarah grinned with open arms.
Vi laughed in pure disbelief and rushed into the other woman's arms. Sarah immediately wrapped her arms around the shorter woman and pulled her in even closer. Vi genuinely can't believe it. After all these years, here she stands, alive and well. Oh, what a relief.
"Of course I missed you. I'm honestly surprised you didn't get your ass thrown back into Stillwater," Vi cackled, holding onto her even tighter.
Sarah looks like she always did, but now she's so much more alive than Vi has ever seen in Stillwater. Obviously, prison tends to dull the average person's inner light and everything, but Sarah very clearly is thriving post imprisonment. Her ginger hair has a shine now that it didn't before, those bright blue eyes held much more wonder, and her lightly tanned skin is much softer than it used to be. Being a free woman suits her well.
"Clearly, our guns are unnecessary in this particular scenario. Who's your friend Vi?" Maddie asked while lowering her gun.
"Yes. Tell us, Vi. Who is your friend?" Caitlyn asked with narrowed eyes.
The way she said friend kind of sounds like the way most people would say disease. She didn't even lower her gun yet. That girl really needs a drink.
"Huh. Never thought you of all people would be rolling with enforcers," Sarah said, still locking Vi in an embrace.
Right, the other two girls are still in uniform. She can understand why Sarah would be weary.
"Ah, well Maddie, Caitlyn, this is Sarah. Sarah, Caitlyn and Maddie. It's a long story, but you can trust them. Maddie's never given me any shit for my past in Stillwater and Caitlyn's the one who actually got me released," Vi explained.
At this point, Sarah unwound herself from the hug. Then, to Vi's immense surprise, she held her hand out to Caitlyn.
"In that case, I should be thanking you. If anyone ever deserved to be free, it's Vi," Sarah said.
"Of course. Vi deserves the world," Caitlyn simply stated while cordially shaking her hand.
Vi is going to try really hard not to blush at that. Try is the key word here. Sarah then went to shake Maddie's hand as well. Apparently living in the free world made the woman civilized. That’s something Vi did not expect.
"Nice to meet you both. I'm sure if you guys can put up with Vi's bitching, you must be alright," Sarah grinned.
Maddie laughed. Caitlyn did not, which surprised Vi because that would be a perfect opportunity to make fun of her. To be fair, Cait's been off tonight anyways. Vi simply scowled and shoved Sarah lightly.
"Please, you know you missed me and my bitching," Vi scoffed playfully.
Sarah grinned and slung her arms around Vi's shoulder. The brawler didn't mind the contact, she's always been a touchy feely kind of person with the people she cares about. Sarah's always been rather physically affectionate too, so this is nothing out of the ordinary. The next words she said were not as ordinary.
"I also miss making you my bitch," Sarah whispered into Vi's ear so quietly only she could hear it.
Vi blushed bright right and immediately nailed the redhead in the stomach with her elbow over the sexual innuendo. Sarah laughed and managed to keep her arms over Vi's shoulders.
"Arrest her on the counts of being insufferable," Vi groaned.
"Please, we'd both be locked up for life," Sarah snorted.
"You two are hilarious together. It's pretty cool that you two are able to reunite now of all times. How long have you guys been friends for?" Maddie asked them.
"Vi and I were a lot more than friends back in Stillwater," Sarah said with a shit eating grin.
It would appear that the blush has only gotten worse. It's so embarrassing that her first instinct is to downplay the relationship so that Caitlyn doesn't get the wrong idea, only for Vi to immediately remember Caitlyn does not give a damn. The woman is in a relationship for god's sake. She does not care about Vi's love life, past or otherwise.
"If you want to get technical about it, yes, she was my prison wife. For what, two years?" Vi answered while looking to Sarah for confirmation.
"I thought it was three. To be fair, time bleeds together when you're imprisoned," Sarah shrugged.
"Something like that. Point is, we were prison wives until like a year before Caitlyn busted me out. She just up and disappeared one day," Vi told them.
"Fuck, I am so sorry about that. I didn't know it at the time, but an old friend of mine pulled some strings and got me out early. I had no idea I was getting let out until I was literally dragged by my hair out the door. I tried convincing my friend to get you out too but their pull was only for one favor. I would have written letters but," Sarah trailed off guiltily.
Vi knew. Stillwater doesn't allow any contact from the outside world. Letters are a no go out there. The shorter woman nudged her former lover slightly.
"Relax, Red. I'm happy you got out. You didn't know, you couldn't exactly give me a heads up. Besides, I'm here now too, so everything kind of worked out," Vi told her sincerely.
She honestly meant it too. Sarah's made some nasty mistakes, obviously since she wound up in Stillwater, but she really is a good person deep down. Vi really has always cared about Sarah. It's hard not to when she was the only source of positive human interactions Vi had in that hellhole.
"Well, it has been lovely meeting you, but we have plans tonight, so we really must get going. I do hope we didn't disturb any plans you might have as well," Caitlyn said urgently, already ushering Vi away.
Why did she sound like they're in such a rush? Oh shit, do they have a reservation? Or are they supposed to be there by a certain time? Vi definitely wouldn't have spent the whole time just talking and standing in place if she knew.
"Ah, don't worry about it, I don't have anything to do tonight," Sarah shrugged.
"Really? Then you should join us! You guys seem like you'd have a bit to catch up on. Besides, the more the merrier right?" Maddie asked while looking at Caitlyn.
"I'm not entirely sure where we're going is Sarah's scene," Caitlyn started quietly.
"Oh, that's a great idea! Do you mind, Cait?" Vi asked her.
Caitlyn looked over at her for a moment and Vi could have sworn her eyes softened. Maybe that's just her being delusional.
"If you really want her around, I don't see why not," Caitlyn said with a smile that looked a little too strained to be sincere.
Vi was focusing more on the fact that she could actually interact with Sarah without someone ready to beat them up at all times. She's relieved that the other two women were nice enough to include Sarah.
"Please tell me we're going for drinks," Sarah sighed as the four of them started to resume their walking.
"You must be a mind reader. Maddie and Caitlyn say the place is great, but I've never been so we're taking their word for it," Vi told her.
Sarah nodded as she moved her arm from Vi's shoulder only to link their arms together. It's nice. Familiar and warm. Sarah's always been a source of comfort for Vi. Looks like some things never change.
"Wait, how did you know it was me when you called out? I was faced away from you and my hair's dyed black. How'd you recognize me?" Vi questioned.
"Babe, I know those back tattoos like I know my right hand," Sarah smirked.
Vi is going to really fight down the blush this time and merely rolled her eyes. Of course she'd say something like that. To be fair, her tattoos are very distinctive, even for people who didn't use to kiss them. Vi kind of wonders what it would be like if Caitlyn kissed her tattoos-nope! Not going to go there.
"I gotta say, I love the black hair on you, but I miss the red. It was just so, Vi," Sarah smiled.
"Yeah, I'm planning on dying it back to my natural hair color soon. The black hair's been fun, but I miss the red too," Vi told her.
"If you need help, I can do it. I'm pretty good at dyeing hair," the redhead informed her.
"That is a very thoughtful offer, but I already agreed to it. I've even got the dye back home. You don't need to worry about it," Caitlyn told her with an almost vicious smile.
Perfect, now Caitlyn and Sarah are glaring at each other. Something tells Vi this is going to be a long night.
**********************
Through the whole walk to the bar Vi still doesn't know the name of, Caitlyn's been acting odd. Like, really odd. She keeps side eyeing Vi and Sarah's interlinked arms while giving Sarah very terse answers. It's really unlike Caitlyn to be so blatantly rude to someone she just met. She wasn't even this bad when she got Vi out of Stillwater.
Vi is starting to suspect that Cait and Maddie got into a bit of a fight earlier. Any time Maddie tries initiating any sort of physical touch, Caitlyn always shies away. Granted, Caitlyn always shies away from Maddie's touch, but Vi's pretty sure that's because of her enforcer reputation. She mainly thinks the two fought because of Cait's attitude towards Sarah.
Vi supposes it doesn't matter that much. Sarah's not bothered by it and Vi can't think of many scenarios where the two would frequently cross paths. It's also very possible that their personalities just don't click.
After what feels like years, the quartet made it to the bar. It was a nice place that had a soothing atmosphere about it. Perfect establishment to take a moment to wind down for a minute.
"I intruded on your plans, first rounds on me. What do you guys drink?" Sarah asked.
Caitlyn opened her mouth, probably to interject, but Maddie thankfully beat her to the punch.
"Oh, thank you! I'll have an old fashioned and Cait usually goes for a gin and tonic right?" Maddie asked while looking at the other woman.
Caitlyn simply nodded in response. Vi opened her mouth to tell her order only for Sarah to wave her off.
"Whiskey sour, I know what you're about. Take a seat and I'll find you guys," Sarah nodded.
The three of them moved to sit at a table with four chairs. Vi was sitting across from Caitlyn and Maddie went to the chair next to Caitlyn's. There was a moment of really awkward silence before Maddie spoke up.
"Man, what are the chances you run into her after over a year of not being able to see each other?" the shorter woman asked.
"I know, I'm still kind of reeling a bit myself. To tell you the truth, I was worried about her. I didn't know she was getting let out early. I had been terrified that something worse happened," Vi sighed.
"Thank god everything worked out. She seems like a pretty cool person. What do you think, Cait?" Maddie asked.
"She's fine," Caitlyn deadpanned.
Damn, so she does not Sarah at all. It disappoints Vi a little bit even though it probably shouldn't. Vi just wishes all the important people in her life could just get along. At that moment, Sarah returned with their drinks. A small round of thank yous went around the table.
"Now then, who wants to hear humiliating stories about Vi when she was in prison?" Sarah smirked.
"I know I do," Maddie teased.
"Literally don't even start with me or I swear I'm drinking your shot," Vi glared.
By god, Vi had so many embarrassing moments in prison. She did not need the girl she liked or the girl she liked's girlfriend to have this kind of dirt on her.
"Babe, trust me, you don't want my shot. So basically, Vi walked up to this guard right," Sarah started.
"That's it, fuck you," Vi glared and snatched the shot.
"Babe, you really don't," Sarah started, but it was too late to save Vi.
The moment the alcohol hit her taste buds, Vi had to fight the urge to retch. Sarah quickly put the chaser to Vi's lips and managed to get her to swallow it. Vi winced and covered her mouth. That was such a mistake, why does she do this to herself?
"Are you alright? I don't think I've ever seen alcohol hit you that hard," Caitlyn asked, voice laced with concern.
"You know, it's actually the funniest thing, Vi can not stand vodka. She's totally good with every other kind of alcohol, but for whatever reason her body just can't handle vodka," Sarah told her.
The redhead is now soothingly rubbing Vi's back as she tries to recover from that heinous shot. All Vi's focused on is not physically convulsing. It would appear that her pettiness gave her some immediate karma.
"I totally deserved that," Vi managed to groan out. Sarah laughed and squeezed her shoulder.
"Probably. I'll be back. For obvious reasons, I need another drink," Sarah chuckled.
"Now obviously I don't know much about your guys' relationship, but you and Sarah look pretty good together, Vi," Maddie teased once Sarah left.
"Please, Vi could do better than that," Caitlyn scoffed while rolling her eyes.
"Hey, I get you're probably weary of her because she was thrown in Stillwater, but Sarah's not so bad," Vi insisted. She felt a very strong urge to defend her friend after everything she's been through.
"I'm getting another drink," was all Caitlyn said before leaving the table.
Vi hadn't even noticed Caitlyn's drink was already gone at this point. She must have guzzled that thing.
"I'm so sorry, I'll go talk to her. I don't understand what is with her tonight," Maddie sighed as she got up to follow the other enforcer.
Vi nodded and took a small sip of her own drink. She really didn't get Caitlyn's problem with Sarah. Even if it was the whole she's an enforcer and Sarah was an inmate, by that logic Maddie would be acting the same way.
At once, the answer hit Vi like a ton of bricks. Of course, Caitlyn's blatant disdain for Sarah is so obvious now! Sarah must have gotten in trouble with the law and Caitlyn had to take care of it!
That made perfect sense. It genuinely would have surprised the Zaunite to know that her ex managed to stay out of trouble with the law. While Sarah certainly wouldn't do anything major to draw attention to herself after Stillwater, it would be just like her to commit some petty theft crime. Caitlyn must have been one of the enforcers that had to deal with Sarah. It explains literally everything about how those two dislike each other.
That even explains why Maddie is perfectly fine with Sarah. She's a junior officer that just started going on the field, so it's likely she hasn't dealt with too many run-ins with criminals.
"Hey, where'd the enforcers go?" Sarah asked as she returned to her seat.
"Caitlyn needed another drink and Maddie followed," Vi explained.
She figured she's just going to ask Caitlyn about whatever Sarah did later. After so long of not being able to see one of her closest friends, she doesn't want to taint the memory of getting into whatever stupid shit she's done since her release. Obviously whatever Sarah did was either insignificant or already taken care of since Caitlyn isn't trying to arrest her.
Vi twisted herself a little bit in her seat to get a better look at Sarah. It's the first time they've been aloneish since reuniting and she looks more vulnerable now. More open. Sarah took one of Vi's hands in hers and squeezed it gently.
"I was worried about leaving you in there," Sarah admitted quietly.
"I was worried about what happened to you when you left," Vi softly told her.
"I meant what I said to that enforcer chick. If anyone ever deserved to be free, it's you," the redhead smiled.
"You give me too much credit," Vi chuckled.
"You don't give yourself enough. I will say, even though I'm happy we're both out of Stillwater and everything, I think it's so fucked up that we can't even have sex anymore. The sex was good when we were in prison, imagine how awesome it would've been as free women," Sarah sighed mournfully.
"Oh, why can't we have sex now?" Vi asked in confusion.
Vi doubts Sarah's in a relationship given what she just said and how touchy she's been throughout the night. Maybe she got an injury or something?
"What, are you forgetting about that blue haired girlfriend of yours that looks like she wants to pull that gun on me every time I interact with you?" Sarah asked with a raised eyebrow.
"What? Cait and I? No, her and Maddie or dating. I'm single," Vi clarified.
Honestly, it feels like a slap in the face for her to have assumed Caitlyn liked her back. Vi prays she's not obvious in her feelings, she does not need or want to cause anymore problems.
"Well if that's the case, I feel bad for the Maddie chick. Blue Hair does not like her," Sarah scoffed. Vi opened her mouth to defend the relationship before Sarah leaned in close. "But more importantly, you're still single?"
Vi laughed and nodded. Sarah stared at her for a long moment, as if she was considering something.
"Sail away with me," Sarah decided to say. Vi's brain short-circuited.
"Huh?" Vi ever so eloquently asked.
"I've got a boat, a decent sized crew, and a world undiscovered. C'mon, think about it. You, me, the vast open sea, a lot of sex," Sarah teased.
"Oh my god do not tempt me right now, that sounds so nice," Vi sighed.
It really, really did. The idea of just dumping all her problems here and sailing off with the beautiful redhead sounded too good to be true. She could ignore the pain of losing her family, of losing Caitlyn, of losing everything she held dear.
"But I can't. I'm sure you've heard about the issues with Piltover, Zaun, and Noxus. We're getting ready for war. I have to protect my people. All of them," Vi frowned.
"Disappointed, but not surprised. You've always been a fighter, that's why you got your ass thrown into solitary half the time. I get it. Even so, now that I know you're free, you're stuck with staying in contact with me now. I'll write you so many letters you'll get sick of my handwriting. I'll be telling you where the ports I go to are, so you'll have no excuse to not write me back," Sarah smiled.
"You got yourself a deal, Red," Vi grinned.
"And hey, maybe when the dust settles, you can sail around for at least a little bit with me. The offer will always stand," Sarah told her.
"I will hold you to that," Vi nodded.
Just because she can't ditch her responsibilities at the current moment in time doesn't mean that a vacation in the future is out of the question. Granted, this is under the assumption that Vi gets to have a future, but there's no need for technicalities right now.
"Well, I am still here for a couple weeks, so that sex offer is still on the table," Sarah whispered, leaning in close.
Vi, yet again, is tempted. Sarah knows what she likes and is familiar to her. Vi might not burn at her touch or yearn for the smallest bit of contact the way she does with Caitlyn, but Sarah is still wonderful. Vi was saved from making a decision when a glass cup slammed on the table. Both former inmates jolted and looked up to see Caitlyn giving them a stare that kind of made Vi fear for her life.
"Sorry. I saw a spider," Caitlyn plainly said. Vi's eyes widened and she quickly stood up.
"Oh please tell me you got that little fucker," Vi hissed.
"I didn't take you for an arachnophobe, Violet. You can take down fully grown men twice your size but you're running at the first sight of a tiny spider. It's cute, really," Caitlyn teased with a glint in her eyes.
Vi felt warmth spread across her chest. That's the Caitlyn she knows and loves. Hopefully that drink she got is helping at least a little bit.
"Oh whatever, Cup-Caitlyn," Vi snorted, internally kicking herself for the slip up of the nickname.
Whatever enjoyment Caitlyn had from messing with Vi was immediately gone. The woman across from her grimaced and looked down at her drink. Shit, now even Caitlyn's getting uncomfortable with that nickname.
Vi resisted the urge to sigh and took a swig of her own drink. It really is going to be a long night.
**********************
Once the four of them decided that they drank enough for the night, Sarah split off from the group once they left the bar. She was close to the port where her boat's docked, so there wasn't a need to walk her home or anything. Once Vi and Sarah shared a quick hug and exchanged contact information, the redhead was off.
The walk back to Caitlyn's place was mostly silent. A tension Vi can't quite place was swimming all over the trio. It felt like forever until they reached the Kiramman household. Caitlyn gave Maddie a quick farewell and walked through the front doors.
So admittedly, Vi was under the impression they would be walking Maddie home. When she realized she was actually quite wrong, Vi gave Maddie a hasty goodbye and followed Caitlyn.
When Vi walked through the front doors, Caitlyn was sitting on the couch and pouring herself another drink. Apparently she simply did not get enough in the past two hours. Vi figures now is as good a time as any to broach the subject of whatever Sarah did.
"Alright, you can be honest with me, what the hell did she do?" Vi sighed as she sat next to Caitlyn.
"What the hell did who do?" the taller woman asked.
"Sarah. What did she do?" Vi asked.
"I'm not following," Caitlyn plainly stated.
"What crime did Sarah commit after she's been free? Her impulse control has always been shit, it doesn't surprise me that she's had a run in with the law. Just tell me what she did," Vi sighed. Caitlyn looked her up and down for a moment, then turned away from her.
"If Sarah's done anything illegal, I wouldn't know about it," Caitlyn told her.
Vi's jaw actually dropped. A million questions are going through her head right now. However, she only verbalized one.
"The what the fuck is your problem with Sarah?" Vi blurted out.
Caitlyn yet again slammed her cup on the table in front of her. Vi's surprised it didn't shatter upon impact.
"Do not taunt me, you know very well why I don't like her," Caitlyn spat.
Vi has genuinely never been as lost as she is right now. How in the fresh hell is she supposed to know why Caitlyn dislikes Sarah to this extent?
"No, I really don't. Look, I get you might be weary of her past at Stillwater. Hell, I can't blame you for not liking her personality but," Vi started, only to get cut off by the woman in front of her.
"Personality? You think I don't like Sarah because of her fucking personality?" Caitlyn practically seethed.
"I quite literally can not comprehend any other reason!" Vi exclaimed in pure distress.
Actually what is happening right now. Caitlyn pinched the bridge of her nose for a moment. The Piltover woman clenched her jaw and looked directly into Vi's eyes.
"If you're really going to make me say it out loud, then fine, I'll say it. I don't like her because it is very obvious to me just how much you like her," Caitlyn scowled.
"I genuinely want you to know that I have never been more confused in my life than I am right now. Why does it matter if I like Sarah?" Vi asked.
"Everything you do matters to me!" Caitlyn snapped.
Vi's confusion is only worsening as she stares at Caitlyn. Her blue eyes held so much pain that it made Vi sick to her stomach. She wants to help. She wants to ease the pain Caitlyn is in immediately. Vi tried to find some kind of words of comfort but the other woman simply kept on going.
"It matters to me that you can't stand vodka. It matters to me that you still get nightmares about Stillwater. It matters to me that when you smile, your entire face glows. It matters to me that you've been pulling away from me. It matters to me that I deserve your rejection and hatred. It matters to me that I want so badly to be in your life and you don't want the same," Caitlyn blurted out, tears starting to well in her eyes.
Vi fought the urge to cry. It was so close to a confession and yet not. The Zaunite merely sighed and moved to grab the glass Caitlyn slammed on the table.
"You need to go to bed, Cait. You're dating Maddie, you really shouldn't be saying things like this," Vi sighed.
"What? I'm not dating Maddie," Caitlyn frowned.
Vi dropped the glass in shock. Miraculously, it didn't spill or shatter. When this emotional crisis is over, Vi has to know what kind of indestructible glass cups Caitlyn buys.
"What? I one hundred percent thought the two of you were together," Vi honestly told her.
"No, no, I never even considered it. I suppose we can tack that on the list of reasons why I'm a terrible person. I was always clear with Maddie that our relationship was only physical and bound to be temporary. I think she got a bit too hopeful along the way," Caitlyn sighed.
Holy shit. Vi's actually the dumbest woman alive. To the shock of absolutely no one, unfortunately. Okay quick Vi, stop staring at her like a dumbass and actually say something to comfort her. Vi moved closer to Caitlyn and firmly held onto her hand.
"I never hated you. I couldn't even if I wanted to. I've been pulling away because I thought you were dating Maddie. I didn't want to cause any problems there so I thought giving you space was the best thing to do. I mean, you even seemed to hate it when I called you Cupcake. I slipped up a couple times tonight and you just looked so upset. I thought I was just doing what you wanted," Vi shrugged.
"I only looked disappointed tonight because you kept correcting yourself. I never thought I'd want to be called something as ridiculous as a cupcake until you stopped calling me one," Caitlyn softly admitted
"Hey, you take that back. Cupcake's aren't ridiculous, they're absolutely delightful," Vi softly joked.
A small smile swept over Caitlyn's face that made Vi's heart pound in her chest. There has never been a more beautiful smile than the one right in front of her.
"Why did you think I was dating Maddie?" Caitlyn suddenly asked.
"It may seem stupid now, but it's because you told me about the fact that you guys slept together. I took it as your way of telling me that kiss didn't matter and was a one time thing. So I just kind of changed the subject to avoid hearing it out loud," Vi sheepishly told her.
"I only told you about Maddie because I was trying to be honest and have you hear it from me. Looking back, it probably would have made more sense to ask you out before mentioning it. I thought you brushing it off and changing the subject was your way of saying you weren't interested. I didn't blame you, especially after everything," Caitlyn sighed.
"You know I've already forgiven you and I already know you meant it. I just can't believe we're both this stupid. See, this is expected behavior from me, but I thought you were smarter than this Cupcake," Vi teased.
Caitlyn let out a laugh this time which sent Vi into a fight of giggles too. Once their laughter died down, Caitlyn reached out and gently cupped her hands under Vi's face. The Zaunite leaned into the warm touch, feeling a sense of peace wash over her.
"Will you just be my girlfriend? It doesn't matter how long I have to wait or what I need to do, I want you to know that I adore you and no matter what the future holds, I want you by my side. I'm going to work every day to be deserving of you so I just," Caitlyn rambled before Vi cut her off with a kiss.
"Yeah, I'll be your girlfriend, Cupcake," Vi giggled once they pulled apart.
Caitlyn looked like someone told her she won the lottery with how ecstatic she looked. It filled Vi's heart with joy knowing she's responsible for that look. It was at that moment that Vi came to another realization.
"At least the mystery of tonight is finally solved. You were so jealous of Sarah it made you seem insane," Vi grinned. Caitlyn blushed and rolled her eyes.
"So what if I was?" the Piltover woman grumbled.
Vi honestly wasn't expecting her to admit it, especially not so quickly. She simply chuckled and moved in to kiss Caitlyn's cheek.
"You don't have to be. I've only got eyes for you, Cupcake," Vi smiled.
"You should know you don't have to worry about Maddie. As totally fucked up as it is to say, I only started sleeping with her because her eyes reminded of yours," Caitlyn sighed.
"I think what's even more fucked up is how happy that makes me," Vi honestly stated.
Before she could even blink, Caitlyn yanked Vi in for another kiss. This one was different from the first. It was desperate, hungry, and it made Vi feel like she just got lit on fire.
The Zaunite kissed back with just as much vigor. Caitlyn broke the kiss only to move her lips down Vi's neck. Those soft lips pressed hot, open mouthed kisses along her neck. Vi audibly gasped when Caitlyn found the crook of her neck.
Caitlyn got the message that it was her sweet spot and started sucking at the vulnerable spot. Vi moaned at the unexpected action at an embarrassingly high volume. In an attempt to recover some of her dignity, Vi bit her lip to prevent any noises from coming out. Caitlyn pulled back a bit and frowned at the sight.
"As hot as you are biting your lip, I want to hear you. I've wanted this for so long words can't even describe it," Caitlyn said.
With that, she returned to making sure no spot on Vi's neck is left untouched by her lips. Vi could only cling onto Caitlyn's shirt as she was ravaged by the taller woman. Reluctantly, Vi allowed the low moans and gasps to escape her lips.
"How do you feel about taking some clothes off, hmm?" Caitlyn asked, searching Vi's eyes for any sense of hesitation. There was absolutely none.
"Let me touch you, Cupcake, please. I need to," Vi begged.
Caitlyn didn't need much convincing. While Caitlyn took both her pants and shirt off, Vi could only manage yanking off her shirt before getting pulled into the other woman. Now they're both laying side by side on the thankfully large couch, bodies entangled with one another.
Holy fuck, this is really happening.
"Tell me what you want from me Caitlyn, shit. I'll do anything you need me to," Vi breathlessly told her.
"Aren't you a good girl, hmm? So eager to please," Caitlyn smirked.
Vi blushed brightly at the call out while Caitlyn took off her bra. She guided Vi's head down to her breasts. Safe to say, the shorter woman got the message really quick. Vi took her beautiful girlfriend's left nipple in her mouth and traced the areola with her tongue. Caitlyn gasped and put a hand in Vi's hair, urging her closer.
As her mouth was working on Caitlyn's breast, Vi's hands began trailing up and down the taller woman's soft sides. She gently massaged and squeezed them, allowing Caitlyn to melt under her touch. Her mouth quickly went to the right nipple and began to give it the same treatment as the left. Caitlyn's ragged breathing is merely edging her on. Vi can already feel herself getting wet from everything she's doing to her lover.
"Inside, I need you to put your fingers inside me," Caitlyn insisted while tossing her underwear off.
She certainly didn't need to tell Vi twice. That doesn't mean Vi won't mess with her a little bit. The Zaunite began slowly trailing the tips of her fingers down Caitlyn's stomach while still giving her chest plenty of attention. Eventually, her fingers made it to Caitlyn's cunt and holy fuck was it wet.
Both women audibly gasped when Vi made contact with Cait's slit. Vi decided she was going to be a little playful and began slowly stroking two fingers up and down the Piltover woman's sex without actually entering inside her. Caitlyn's grip on her head tightened and caused a delightful sting.
Caitlyn began bucking her hips in hopes of getting Vi's fingers inside, but at just the right time the Zaunite would manage to pull back. When Vi looked up, she could see the blissed out face on her lover and that sent a wave of heat straight to her core.
She's honestly having the time of her life teasing Caitlyn. The whimpers of being so close yet not quite getting what she wanted was driving Vi absolutely mad. Then, Caitlyn cupped Vi's face and pulled her away from the breast she was paying special attention to. When Vi looked at Caitlyn, she was an expression the Zaunite had never seen before. It was a calculating look that meant business.
"I'm warning you right now, you can tease me as long as you like, but I promise you I will return the favor tenfold when I get my hands on you. Now are you going to be a good girl and fuck me, or are you going to continue acting like you have control?" Caitlyn firmly asked her.
If Vi wasn't sure if she had a praise kink before, she knows she does now. The prospect of being a good girl was the push Vi needed to slowly slip one finger inside of Caitlyn's beautiful cunt. Plus, she's hot when she's bossy. Caitlyn moaned lowly and grabbed onto Vi's back.
"Another one," the Piltover woman managed to command.
Very eager to see her girlfriend come, Vi did as instructed. The second finger slipped inside with absolutely zero resistance. There Vi sat, absolutely mesmerized at the sight of Caitlyn taking in two of Vi's fingers. She's starting to think she might actually come from this sight alone.
"You're so beautiful clenching on my fingers like this Cait, holy fuck," Vi whispered.
The other woman almost immediately tightened around Vi. Looks like she's not the only one that enjoys a bit of complimenting during sex.
Vi bit her lip as she slowly began to pick up the pace of pushing her fingers inside of Caitlyn's wet pussy. She can feel her girlfriend's walls tighten around her, signaling she's coming to her high soon. Without letting up the pace, Vi leaned down and swallowed Caitlyn's moans with a kiss. Caitlyn wrapped her arms around Vi's neck and tugged her in as close as possible.
"Fuck, keep going, I'm so close," Caitlyn moaned.
Given how fucking tight she is, Vi certainly believes that statement. Vi's fingers began pumping impossibly faster as Caitlyn desperately rutted her hips upward. Caitlyn clutched onto Vi's shoulders as she finally hit her sweet release. With a loud moan, Caitlyn rode out her high on Vi's fingers.
This is probably the hottest thing the Zaunite has seen in her entire life. The woman she's in love with is desperately trying to regain her breath after Vi just gave her an orgasm. This is a memory she will be cherishing for years to come.
Vi slowly took her fingers out of Caitlyn and brought them to her lips. While making direct eye contact with her, Vi tastes Caitlyn's arousal still coating her fingers.
"Tastes sweet. You know, like a cupcake," Vi grinned.
"You are so annoying," the taller woman huffed with no real bite in her voice.
Caitlyn let out a small giggle before yanking Vi down into another searing kiss. It ended way too shortly when Caitlyn pulled away. Then, the Piltover woman looked at Vi and frowned.
"You're wearing way too many clothes. We're going to need to change that," Caitlyn told her.
At once, Caitlyn got to work on undoing her chest bindings. Vi was so focused on kicking off her pants that she didn't notice the white piece of paper slip from her pocket. Apparently, Caitlyn did.
"What's this note for? And why does it say 'when you're ready to sail away with me'?" Caitlyn frowned.
Vi took a moment to process the question because of how elated she was over the fact that she made Caitlyn come. The Zaunite glanced down at the paper before shrugging.
"Oh, Sarah wrote me that. She wanted me to leave with her when she went back to sea. For many obvious reasons I declined, but she still wrote down her next port so that I could write," Vi mumbled.
She didn't really care about the note. What she cared about was having Caitlyn on top of her. As it would turn out, Caitlyn cared quite a bit about said note. The Piltover woman crumpled the note and tossed it dismissively behind her.
"I'm going to make you come so hard you won't even remember your own name, much less her's. You're not going to want to sail away from me when I'm done with you," Caitlyn whispered darkly in Vi's ear.
That's way more attractive than it should have been. Now that Vi's pants and underwear are off, Caitlyn is starting to nip at the shorter woman's chest. Vi whimpered as her girlfriend's soft lips made contact with the valley between her breasts. She's so embarrassingly wet right now, she needs to come soon.
"Cupcake, please, I need you," Vi begged.
"Oh? Need me for what?" Caitlyn asked innocently as she continued to press kisses down to Vi's stomach.
The taunt made Vi want to scream in frustration. It's pretty damn obvious what Vi needs right about now.
"Touch me," Vi insisted.
"My poor darling, I am touching you. If you want something specific from me, you have to be a good girl and ask," Caitlyn smirked as her hands began massaging Vi's thighs.
Oh she's evil. It's like Caitlyn thinks Vi is just some whore that's going to be begging her to come!
Well, she would be correct, but Vi is not happy about it!
"Just eat me out already before I go insane!" the Zaunite whined.
Caitlyn's eyes flashed and before Vi could blink, her girlfriend was pressing open mouthed kisses on her cunt. Vi’s breath hitched in her throat as she slammed her hand over her mouth to stop her moans.
"If I don't get to hear you, you don't get to come. Now let me hear those pretty moans Vi, I won't tell you again," Caitlyn warned.
The fact that she's so vocal is absolutely humiliating to Vi, but the idea of not being able to come is so much worse. Therefore, Vi let her hand flop at her side so now the sounds she makes is all for Caitlyn's ears.
Caitlyn smiled and dragged her tongue up Vi's slit. The Zaunite physically did a full body shiver at the sensation. The pleasure crawled all the way up her spine in a way that was too intoxicating for words.
"Who's making you feel this good, hmm? Go on, say it," Caitlyn quietly hissed.
Vi really doesn't want to speak, her voice is just going to sound all shaky and awkward. But something tells her that Caitlyn is going to get it out of Vi, one way or another. Even if Vi's embarrassed, it's still really hot.
"Fuck, Cupcake, it's you. You make feel so fucking go- oh fuck," Vi gasped as Caitlyn's tongue went inside of her.
Feeling the Piltover woman's tongue inside of her is almost making her scream. She was already so wet and this is making it so worse. It's only a matter of time before Vi completely unravels.
Vi tried moving her hips to speed things along, but Caitlyn pinned them to the couch with her hands. All the Zaunite could do is lay there and take the pleasurable attack on her cunt.
"Tell me you're mine, darling. Tell me you're mine because I have always been yours," Caitlyn moaned into Vi's pussy.
"Fuck, Cupcake, I'm yours. Only yours, oh my god," Vi cried out.
Upon hearing those words, Caitlyn's tongue began vigorously circling Vi's clit. The taller woman began repeatedly pressing against her most sensitive spot and before she could even comprehend it, Vi was coming all over Caitlyn's face.
"Fuck," they both moaned at the same time.
They made eye contact for a moment before giggling like a couple of idiots. Caitlyn slowly moved up Vi's body and gave her kiss while her arousal was still coated over the Piltover woman's lips. Literally everything Caitlyn does is so hot.
Once they broke apart Caitlyn laid next to Vi and began gently messing with her hair. Vi yawned and leaned her head on Vi's shoulder.
"You feeling good? Do you need anything, my darling?" Caitlyn softly asked her.
Vi's tummy did a small backflip at the possessive 'my' in front of darling. The things this woman does to her is actually insane.
"I feel fucking amazing actually. All I need is you, Cupcake," Vi smiled.
"I have to say, I feel pretty fucking amazing myself," Caitlyn chuckled.
"Well then I did my job," Vi giggled.
"I love you, you know. I'm not expecting you to say it back, but I really think you need to," Caitlyn began, only to get cut off with Vi's lips on hers.
"I love you too. Good luck getting rid of me now, sucker," Vi smirked. Caitlyn simply laughed and pulled her in even closer.
"Sounds perfect to me, Vi. That sounds absolutely perfect."
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That very morning, Caitlyn and Vi walked into town hand in hand. Vi was originally concerned that it would hurt her reputation to be with her in such an obviously romantic setting, but Caitlyn was having none of it. As they were strolling down the street, they met up with a couple enforcers that Vi remembers meeting but unfortunately forgot the name of. Oh shit, Maddie’s there too. Hopefully it’s not awkward or anything.
"Oh, congrats on getting back together you two!" the blonde woman smiled at seeing their joined hands.
“Aw, I’m for you guys! You make a sweet couple,” Maddie agreed.
Vi felt herself physically relax. Maddie’s not heartbreakingly upset, which is truly all Vi wanted. Even though Caitlyn may have never reciprocated Maddie’s feelings, she is clearly also relieved that she’s alright with this outcome.
"About time, Vi. That one was a wreck without you," the black haired man teased while pointing to Caitlyn. Vi laughed a bit while Caitlyn blushed.
"Thanks, but we never like, broke up or anything. This is the first time we've started dating," Vi told them.
"Wait seriously?" the blonde asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Yes, it's true. Our relationship is quite new," Caitlyn told them.
"Wow. You guys were not good at hiding it," the blonde deadpanned.
Caitlyn and Vi looked at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter. They were totally right, after all. The two women were awful at hiding their feelings for each other.
Vi smiled easily as the other three enforcers began rambling on about the plans they had coming up this week. Caitlyn gently squeezed Vi's hand which the Zaunite quickly returned. As long as they had each other, they would be alright.
"Hey Babe, how did- ah boo! You guys are totally dating now, aren't you?" the voice behind them identifiable as Sarah groans. Vi bit back a laugh as Caitlyn frowned at Sarah's presence.
"Yes, we are now very happily dating, Sarah," Vi grinned.
"I suppose I'm happy for you. But hey, if you're ever dating unhappily, you know I'm always available," Sarah smirked.
"Vi, grab my gun," Caitlyn deadpanned.
"Huh? Why?" Vi asked.
"Because I might actually shoot her," Caitlyn scowled.
"Yeah, alright, no gun for you," Vi mumbled as she hastily grabbed it from Caitlyn's holster.
And here Vi thought those two might get along now that the air has been cleared. Clearly, that will not be the case. Vi simply kissed Caitlyn's cheek and watched as a small smile graced the other woman's face.
At least now Vi has a little more incentive to survive Ambessa's wrath. A future with Caitlyn is, without a doubt, something worth fighting for.
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reveriesrequiem · 24 days ago
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short writing practice one-shot, with rodydeku and erasercloud sprinkles. keep in mind this is only a hobby, and i am not an experienced writer.
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wind rustled through izuku's hair as he sipped at his lychee-flavored boba. the sky was a a breathtaking orange-to-pink, and the clouds were in the cumulus formation.
izuku's always liked clouds. it was his little thing. like how denki acts like he hates it, but he actually like being compared to pikachu. yaomomo likes feeling useful. izuku likes clouds. hitoshi likes hugs-but only if its cold.
contrary to popular belief, izuku wasn't actually oblivious. he could see the way momo and kyoka looked at eachother. the way tenya looked to ochako for praise whenever he makes a joke or pop-culture reference.
the way denki always made to include hitoshi in whatever he did. the way aizawa-sensei had a picture on his desk of a blue-haired boy with a smile to rival even the brightest stars, and constantly held onto a necklace that held a ring identical to the one on his finger.
in short, he wasn't oblivious.
he was burst out of his thought process by a shuffling of footsteps behind him. a hand gently placed itself on his shoulder, warm and familiar.
"are you alright, midoriya?" aizawa-sensei's voice, gruff yet full of concern, rang out from behind him. he'd been, admittedly, softer, ever since the war. izuku thinks he, tenya and yaomomo make for great co-parents.
izuku blinked sleepily, "yes, aizawa-sensei. just..thinking about something."
"on the roof?" izuku nodded simply. his teacher huffed in fond irritation.
"..aizawa-sensei?" he started, quietly, a few minutes later. he picks at the label around his boba.
aizawa-sensei grunted.
"have you ever..loved someone that- that you can't have?" izuku's voice quivered, trailing off at the end, nervous.
"..i have."  izuku looked at his teacher, suprised.
"and how do you...deal with that?"
"other than drinking boba on roofs and staring at clouds?" he teased.
izuku tsked.
"this is about your othenan friend, isn't it?" aizawa-sensei deadpanned. izuku blushed and tilted his head in a shy 'yes'.
the black-haired man sighed and sat down next to him. the hand on izuku's shoulder moved to his head and ruffled his hair.
"..i had a friend. in my first year, when i moved to the hero course. i didn't want to be his friend, but i ended up hanging out with him and his group anyway." he could've sworn aizawa smiled. it was a wistful one, one that people would often have when reminiscing.
"he died in my second year."
"oh- i'm sorry – "
"don't apologise, kid. " he buried the lower half of his face in his capture scarf and continued, " i admit, i came to love him. romantically, i mean. but it was too late for it to go anywhere farther than it already was."
"w- what was his name?" izuku asked, gently.
aizawa-sensei hesitated before answering.
"...oboro. his name was oboro. "
izuku's smile was small, but kind, "thank you for sharing this with me, aizawa-sensei." he says, honestly. his teacher blinks, and bashfully pulls up his capture scarf to cover his mouth once more.
"c'mon, kid. let's get you back to the dorms." the gruff man offers his hand. the teen grasps it, laughing as he pulls himself up.
~
"..shota?" oboro had murmured, carding a hand through his boyfriend's hair as he dozed.
"mh?.. he hummed.
"do you think..we're together in every universe?" the blue-haired boy questioned softly. shota cracked an eye open to stare at him, confused.
"what brought this on?" he asks, voice hoarse from sleep. oboro blinks lazily, sky-blue eyelashes fluttering.
his face softened before he answered, "nothing, nothing! just..curious, i guess." he laughs quietly before pecking shota on the cheek.
the red-eyed boy gave a 'hmm' as he looked up at his partner. "i think, that any universe without you is a sad one." he muttered, sleepily. oboro smiled so wide his face must've hurt.
he rained kisses all over shota's face before tucking his face into the crook of his boyfriend's neck, a smitten grin stretching his lips.
shota huffed contentedly and settled down to fall back asleep.
~
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yohankang · 4 months ago
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hi besties, what dramas are you watching this season??
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exopelagic · 6 months ago
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i said i wouldn’t do it this time but it’s 3am and mods asleep. boy
#welcome to another episode of Luke is insane abt hockey boy!#this time featuring a guy who is actually this time almost (ALMOST) confirmed to be queer#the almost is partly me being insane because I don’t trust anything anymore#but like. there are only so many reasons you wear pride converse. that is not ally behaviour#it just threw me this time I think bc I’d been like no. heterosexual. bc I think I became aware of him when he joined the real hockey team#because the OTHER problem is that the whole time I’d been thinking he was cute as hell (bc he is) and simultaneously being like no. bad.#anyway this meant that I have actually talked to him a bunch without overthinking it this term which honestly has been very cool#not like a whole lot but we’ve played together a decent amount and hopefully will keep doing that#and yesterday discovered hes recommending other people talk to me abt goalieing which is insane to me bc I am truly not that good#but apparently I made an impression!#anyway it does not help that this guy has gotten incredibly good at hockey in the past few months#idk man I make bad decisions (I say as if this was a decision) bc it is now the end of term once again <3#which means absolutely nothing can or will happen until after summer. which isn’t an issue#I’m just frustrated by my tendency to realise these things right before I’m about to not see the guy for X period of time#I also desperately need to stop crushing on hockey boys I swear but in my defence that is the main way I meet people#I think I’m cursed actually. that would explain many things#anyway he also has exams until next Tuesday which means he’ll be at hockey next week but idk abt this week which is devastating#i just wanna have talk to the guy more honestly to see how that goes bc we’ve not rlly talked individually for an extended time yknow.#in other words we have not had A Conversation it’s been groups or like quicker exchanges#he’s kinda quiet but i can’t quite tell which way yknow. I know he’s Watching basically all the time. and he is slightly awkward#which is also kinda cute. he gets a lil rambly when he talks abt hockey and I wanna push that button more#i. topsy if you’re reading this you’re gonna laugh so hard I just realised. he’s captain of the team now.#which sidenote is INSANE bc he started playing with them THIS YEAR#but oh my god. okay.#anyway. I need to start complimenting guys more for multiple reasons but also#1. he dresses very cool 2. he caught me looking at his shirt last week without saying anything (BEFORE I caught the rainbow converse)#i compliment women on their clothes and jewellery and hair and shit all the time but I do not with men bc. I mean do I need to explain.#but ​this is so unfair I am haunted by existence of boy and here we are once again. posting on tumblr with the possibility of seeing him lik#two more times before summer. might be three or four depending on what he comes to#luke.txt
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blitz0hno · 6 months ago
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I don't want to get off my phone I don't want to stay on my phone I don't want to pump gas I don't want to do deliveries I don't want to get ready for bed I don't want to write anything of substance I don't want to create I don't want to not create I don't want to be here I don't want to go anywhere I don't want to move I don't want to stay still my brain and body seem to simply want to sit here and Yearn
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weirdnerdygoat · 1 year ago
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I'm doing far too much introspection lately, can't i just go back to calmly reading fiction?
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delta-piscium · 1 year ago
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✨🌈☀️send this to ten people you're happy to see every time they pop up on your dash/notif and wish them a good day🌟🌈💥
been staring at this for a day like 🥰🥰🥰 filled with endless love and joy here, like so soft, and also right back at you, always thrilled to see you and I hope you have the loveliest day
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luxraydyne · 2 years ago
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pop quiz what breed of childhood trauma borne neuroticism is it called when being condescended to on just the most neutral, limpid, nothing thoughts you express like you’re a little silly child, or “out of your depth”, or woefully misinformed, or just speaking on something you shouldn’t cause fuckin hell you’re doing it *wrong*, and with the most plainly obvious remark too, makes you want to chew on your own arm until you reach bone marrow
#i hate internet discourse i hate internet discourse i loathe online Big Fandom it makes me come out in hives#i'm not stupid. i'm NOT stupid. i know this. i'm not being mean and nasty and bitchy either. just saying shit wrong.#siiigh i don't want to just stop making shit and like speaking. about stuff. on the internet. but like also. why would you?#there are exceptions (who i hope would recognise themselves if not i apologise) but largely i am more miserable#and more self destructive more regularly since stepping out of anonymity and engaging with people online#except animal crossing. like everyone i've interacted with through acnh has been. really Nice tbh. which is nuts lol#the stories you hear are almost universally bad and yet everyone i've chatted with albeit briefly has been so nice#i get anxiety over whether or not some stranger i'm never gonna meet thinks i'm an imbecile or not like how stupid is that? it's ridiculous#my self esteem has somehow gone backwards???#it don't fuckin matter! proving a relative nobody wrong and keeping her in her place don't matter! i mean it's daft but what's the point#and i know i need to internalise that i KNOW but damn it's hard#i want to just say fuck it and leave. become like a fandom esque zombie or whatever. but i also want autonomy over what i've produced now#unless i just delete all that too ig#but why should i!!#i go through this cycle every month it's like having an extra self-loathing hormone#if you're super attached to something w my username on it just download it for yourself you have my blessing give urself peace of mind lol#in principle i want to ghost and all of a sudden i'm am unperceivable and none of it's my damn problem any more lmao#but then i'm too bullish and prideful and egotistical so i'm like 'bbbut my seven tumblr followers who always like my silly text posts uwu'#i'm the dw in this scenario. the sign says 'just leave you're a nuisance' and i'm looking right at it like 'he he. no <3'#even if just doing what the signs says would definitely go some way to help with not wanting to just perish. or the arm chewing thing.#i just. simply. think. i would like to know. what it is i have done specifically#i know the answer is somewhere between nonexistent and nonsensical like it's not worth thinking about#what i've done is exist in a way that is arbitrarily deemed stupid/distasteful/ugly/deviant/noisy/irriating/etc it's irrelevant#and yet. there is a burning black void of needing to know in me. anon hate get into my dms tell me why you dislike me so#nothing is scarier. is the phraseology#like a game of wackamole with every utterance. is this one gonna get bapped with the hammer of 'you are so wrong'? why? does it matter?#who knows....it is a mystery......#i matter so little! i have 50 followers! two (2) ppl read the fanfic and thought it was 'aight! i don't matter! i am such a tiny fish!#what is even the point just leave me be no one cares!#i *could* redirect this hysterical existential horror energy into my original work. i *should* do that
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monsterfactoryfanfic · 4 months ago
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if I've learned anything from grad school it's to check your sources, and this has proven invaluable in the dozens of instances when I've had an MBA-type try to tell me something about finances or leadership. Case in point:
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Firefox serves me clickbaity articles through Pocket, which is fine because I like Firefox. But sometimes an article makes me curious. I'm pretty anal about my finances, and I wondered if this article was, as I suspected, total horseshit, or could potentially benefit me and help me get my spending under control. So let's check the article in question.
It mostly seems like common sense. "...track expenses and income for at least a month before setting a budget...How much money do I have or earn? How much do I want to save?" Basic shit like that. But then I get to this section:
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This sounds fucking made up to me. And thankfully, they've provided a source to their claim that "research has repeatedly shown" that writing things down changes behavior. First mistake. What research is this?
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Forbes, naturally, my #1 source for absolute dogshit fart-sniffing financial schlock. Forbes is the type of website that guy from high school who constantly posts on linkedin trawls daily for little articles like this that make him feel better about refusing to pay for a decent package for his employees' healthcare (I'm from the United States, a barbaric, conflict-ridden country in the throes of civil unrest, so obsessed with violence that its warlords prioritize weapons over universal medical coverage. I digress). Forbes constantly posts shit like this, and I constantly spend my time at leadership seminars debunking poor consultants who get paid to read these claims credulously. Look at this highlighted text. Does it make sense to you that simply writing your financial goals down would result in a 10x increase in your income? Because if it does, let me make you an offer on this sick ass bridge.
Thankfully, Forbes also makes the mistake of citing their sources. Let's check to see where this hyperlink goes:
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SidSavara. I've never heard of this site, but the About section tells me that Sid is "a technology leader who empowers teams to grow into their best selves. He is a life-long learner enjoys developing software, leading teams in delivering mission critical projects, playing guitar and watching football and basketball."
That doesn't mean anything. What are his LinkedIn credentials? With the caveat that anyone can lie on Linkedin, Mr. Savara appears to be a Software Engineer. Which is fine! I'm glad software engineers exist! But Sid's got nothing in his professional history which suggests he knows shit about finance. So I'm already pretty skeptical of his website, which is increasingly looking like a personal fart-huffing blog.
The article itself repeats the credulous claim made in the Forbes story earlier, but this time, provides no link for the 3% story. Mr. Savara is smarter than his colleages at Forbes, it's much wiser to just make shit up.
HOWEVER. I am not the first person to have followed this rabbit hole. Because at the very top of this article, there is a disclaimer.
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Uh oh!
Sid's been called out before, and in the follow up to this article, he reveals the truth.
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You can guess where this is going.
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So to go back to the VERY beginning of this post, both Pocket/Good Housekeeping and Forbes failed to do even the most basic of research, taking the wild claim that writing down your budget may increase your income by 10x on good faith and the word of a(n admittedly honest about his shortcomings) software engineer.
Why did I spend 30 minutes to make a tumblr post about this? Mostly to show off how smart I am, but also to remind folks of just how flimsy any claim on the internet can be. Click those links, follow those sources, and when the sources stop linking, ask why.
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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago
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youtube
golf
#another case where I post something entirely random that has nothing to do with anything I've ever posted here#and seems very different from costumes and cat pictures or etc. but ghbhj..... I could spend hours having pointless conversations#with myself like this. briefly got fixated on making fake chats on this website for a period of like 3 days straight a few months ago#(its 'chat-simulator.com/simulator' I think..???) but I made a ton of them.. one with some random family bickering with each other. another#that was like a magic school group chat with like 8 differnet students helping each other with an assignment#and just talking about things. another was a fake text xonversation between a king's assistant#and someone who was working in the castle kitchens and they were trying to plan a time to meet up to exchange the stuff that the assistant#stole from the king so that the chef could sell the items on a black market or whatever. then this one with just some weird#group of friends trying to plan to meet up to play golf and etc. etc. etc.#Talking to myself has always been one of my favorite hobbies. for some reason it's so fun lol#just making up random discussions people might have#not even entertaining or interesting or funny ones but just like... anything.. it doesn't matter. It could be a 5 hour long discussion abou#cheese or something.#THOUGH maybe that is just an extension of having always been a writer like.......... isn't that basically just what writing is? making up#fake scenarios and conversations between fake people?? lol... But I guess Writing Writing usually has some sort of goal or story you're#trying to tell. Whereas stufff just like ''3 elves discuss their favorite bread toppings for 15 minutes'' has no purpose#and is not even that interesting or cool so there's no reason behind it and is more just silly fun I guess#Aside from the physical health problems and ocd over something bad happening to me or etc. I've often thought I would be good at one#of those 'get locked in a blank white room for 24 hours' type challenges. since I would probably just sit there and be like 'okey. :3#I shall have an elaborate group conversation about elven politics with myself.' and would just pace around the room acting as different#people arguing with each other for like 6 hours lol#ANYWAY.. ultimate recreational activity...#one tiny little glimpse here of the sorts of things that my computer is full of but that i never post lol#Its interesting how communication develops when you're just talking to yourself alone in a vacuum. Sort of like inside jokes between two#best friends that just seem nonsense to everyone else. My folders of things that probably just read as disconnected gibberish or something#but are just mildly amusing to me.#Though also I just realized this is so tiny on tumblr I can barely read it.. hrrm.
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astrxealis · 6 months ago
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i am so used to my pinned post i kinda don't want to change the format but i want to
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#Like. i want it to be more ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 u get me?#it's too small/limiting for me rn ragggghhh ..... will change it soon ^_^ 💖#wow. hard to believe it's already june. 4-5ish months till i'm not a minor anymore and around 2 months till college#happy pride btw :3 Hm. i am still not out to my parents but i am vv comfortable now w who i am.#i know for sure i prefer short hair over long hair and hate when it gets past this certain length that i then need a haircut#and i've actually grown comfortable wearing dresses and skirts! which ngl has been there a bit since i watched hamilton#but only now ?? like. Yeah.#it's funny bcs when i had shorter hair than my short hair rn LMFAO it was shorter than i actually liked#but the perks were my friends telling me You Look Like A Guy Even More and some storeclerk calling me sir#but that was funny bcs i was w my twin. and ok we're identical but maybe not obvious at first bcs i wear glasses and they have slightly more#femme and long hair and her style is diff from mine. colorful or bright or maximalist vs minimalist or dark or max 3 tones same colorsalways#LMFAO. me & my twin r super comfy w each other so sometimes we make Jokes. uh. yeah. HELP?#if u get it than yaaaa B) o/ anyway yeah. also comfortable w small amts of makeup now!#if it looks natural enough i'm cool w it :3 i also like stylistic shit. but haven't tried that stuff yet <3#i just hate makeup in general when it is too much that you don't look like yourself anymore... unless it's Cool#IDK HWO TO EXPLAIN. whatever it's not important. <3#ouuughhh i love my new pompompurin stuffed toy... official from sanrio in japan hehehehehehhe#i like making it do stupid shit like eating my soup or mochi and i like using it to tell my mom stuff like#pompompurin thinks you suck (jokingly. i love my mom she knows how i am!)#so she says back pompomsometbinv tell your amo (owner?) she sucks more LMFAOOO#also. just. fhsbkfjd official merch... >___< we were supposed to head back to our hotelwtvr after gpinf to alihabara#akihabara** but while waiting to reload the card thing. i spotted the official yostar store and :)) YAY#so got a little standee. for arknights. 1 for me 1 for my twin but it's gachafied and the fucking. thing. is.#every chara u cld get was basically a fav of mine ESP. TEQUILA. HOLY FUCK. MY ABSOLUTE JOY SEEING HIM.#but the two we got... were both my my Twin's favs... who i also like but. they are Not my faves. :)#so apparently just in general my gacha luck really sucks.#even w the gbf pins. artemis managed to get BELIAL and then for me uhh. ok we got 1 for a surprise gift for a friend#they r not active on tumblr atm i think so shhh anyway so basically anyway. i cld have gotten sandalphon. or other ppl. and i got two charas#i DO like but... more are arti's favs than mine still..... haha. at least w the ffxiv coasters we had equal luck. Amazing luck.
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bloodawakening · 1 year ago
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Rebellion. hi yes I am still hibernating (my goal is to still get a hub blog set up for other muses I plan to write + bring back but guess who might be having an idea for a new muse...)
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buttercuparry · 2 months ago
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Urgent: Extremely low funds!!
I am writing to you on behalf of Abdulsalam Al-Anqur ( @aboodanqar20 ), whose family has managed to raise a mere 3% of evacuation/survival funds. At this point, it would soon be one year of bombing and destruction of Gaza and I request you to take this in consideration while reading the post. For almost one year, the family has tried to get by, before finally reaching out to all of us for help. I am going to keep this short in hopes that this would be an easier read and would take only a few minutes of your day. 
Abdulsalam is only 26 years old and is father to one year old Iman. He hopes to save his daughter who is currently suffering from malnutrition and offer her a better life by evacuating to Egypt.
However as the borders are currently closed, the Al-Anqur family needs your help to collect funds for survival. There are 7 members in total, including an elderly couple.
Abdulsalam’s father (Ahmed Al-Anqur), is 54 years old and has recently been diagnosed with cancer. He has been advised to undergo surgery every three months, but with how things are in Gaza, the family isn't sure if it is possible. They are also worried that even if by some miracle it becomes so, they might not be able to bear the cost of it
What Ahmed, hence needs is access to medicines to get by. He also has a weak heart and already has 4 stents in place.  
The Al-Anqur family has been displaced several times and because they couldn't bear the cost of transportation, they once had to travel from the North to Deir Al-Balah in the South ON FOOT ! They have also been subjected to terror and humiliation when they crossed military checkpoints.  
Currently the family is living in a camp surrounded by waste and garbage and would like access to a decent tent before winter sets in.
For a long time, Abdulsalam refused to share his burden with anyone. But after almost a year of surviving through this genocide, he has grown tired and now fears for his daughter’s life. He is also close to tears about his father’s condition and requests  your help in  raising funds for survival. Please help him in whatever way you can. He has come onto  tumblr with a lot of hope. Please donate if you can. Boost and share if you can't. 
Currently at €1,703 / €50,000. Only €797 till €2,500.
Vetting #4 by @gazavetters ( this blog is run by Gazans themselves whom you have helped and still continue to help. Please, a lot of hope is riding on your participation).
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breadfan · 1 year ago
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to be playing P5R but constantly thinking of Yakuza is like having to juggle between two jobs
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