#i had this thought and i was like it’s sooo very in character but i doubt i will write a fic for it so <3 have this
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
FIIIINALLY almost nailed my designs for lizzie and caspian can i get a HEEEELLL YEAAH???? i think these two make a vvery cute duo and i cannt wait to see them again. i also hope they both get hurt reaaaallly really badly. togeter
#OOOHH OH OOOHH IVE BBBEEEN REWATCHING THINGSSS ive been rewatching riptide weeee im never leaving here weeeee!!!#caspian and lizzie are SUUUUCH A CUTE COUPLE CAN I BE HONNESTT but in a princess and knight way. do you hear me.#caspian is such a 'lights her cigarette' kinda guy. hes such a dude that has made a vow to a very very special lady#he would float half of a boat w nothing but his water powers for eight days and he would do it all for her.I LOVE THEMM#IM SO HAPPY ABT LIZZIES REDESIGN BTW IM MAKIN A WHOLE DOODLY PAGE FOR HER N IM HAVING FUNNN YEAAAHHH#CASPIAN HAS ALSO BEN ENTIRELY RECYCLED IN MY MINDS EYE. they describe him as Wet sooo much. so i drew that and im happy abt it#caspian is sooo handsom in my brain thats why i draw him so rarely bc drawing pretty boys is HARD. but i DID IT.#when he first appeared i thought he was a triton too bc i didn talk to the fandom n i knew nothing abt dnd. so learning otherwise was funny#a residual effect o that mixup is me giving him ears thatre like the fins of a flying fish. he seems to light and carefree.#the lighter fins o a flying fish just fit so perfectly. also his white hair fades into mist in my mind#NOW FOR LIZZIE ART NOTES.A BLACK ROSE.sometimes a red rose.shes so roses to me!!gorgeous but coated in thorns. i wanted her hair to-#-resemble roses or smth like that. square swirls are also soo her. reevaluating her ref sheet was also fun bc WOW the triangles and birds#SO FUN!! shes so spikyy..her and caspian are such a good dynamic in everyway#personality wise and appearance wise and i wanted to capture that sortaaaa. in vibes. yknow.im veryhappy w getting their designs sorted out#ALSO I GAVE LIZZie tha jhonny da homicidal manac boots. bc i love that comic and i will never stop giving characters da boots.#also in other news ddoes anyone else still wonder abt destinys blade and how it used to be a golden lotus sword but then it also used to#be a person and caspian just had that sword for however da fuck long and then so willingly gave it to gillion after he lost his sword#llike did he know. did he know. also do you think caspian and lizzie have explored ea
66 notes
·
View notes
Text
Seeing You (AOT Men x Fem Reader)
Description: Here are some head canons and drabbles about how some of the Attack on Titan men react to seeing you naked for the first time.
Warnings: Nudity, suggestive content, smut for some characters (warnings will be placed individually), fluff.
A/N: Slowly working through my end of year list. I wanted to post twice this week, but honestly November is such a busy month for me. Stayed tuned for the Giyuu fic, that's next on my list. Enjoy!
Erwin Smith:
Erwin would 100% be a respectful partner, but for some reason I feel like the first time he see's you naked would be purely accidental
Being a captain or squad leader, I could see you being in your office and you accidently spill your tea or something and you need to change your clothes. Thinking no one would enter without knocking, you strip to change
Only for Erwin to come barging into your room wanting to discuss an urgent matter with you and the one time he doesn't knock is in this moment
Erwin would be sooo embarrassed, like face shocked and then turning red before he immediately whips around and apologizes before leaving you to finish changing. Feels horrid and never enters your office without knocking ever again
"Fuck", you hiss as the hot liquid hits your uniform, not only staining your shirt, but your pants as well. You thank your foresight, knowing you always kept a few extra uniforms and clothes in your office for this very situation. After removing your ODM gear, you being to strip off your clothes. That's when you realize the tea you had spilled managed to soak your bra as well. Without a second thought, you remove it as well, wanting to have a full set of fresh clothes. The moment your bra hits the floor is the moment you office door flings open. You immediately lock eyes with Erwin Smith; Commander of the Scouts Regiment, your partner, and soon to be dead man. "Captain there's something I want-", he begins, but the words die in his throat as his baby blue eyes take in your nearly nude body. Panic sets in about three seconds later and he turns around, quickly slamming the door shut, keeping his back turned to give you some privacy. "I'm so, so sorry", he says, stuttering. You put your clean clothes on as fast as you can. "I'm good sir", you tell him as you begin to put the ODM gear back on. "Listen-" Erwin starts, but you cut him off. "It's ok darling. No one else saw and we are in a relationship, at some point you are going to see me naked", you say, giving him a soft smile. However you next words turn darker, "Next time knock, the last thing I need is to flash the entire Regiment", your smile fading. "It won't happen again", Erwin says, clearing his throat uncomfortably, before moving to lay the papers he'd brought with him on your desk. The two of you fall back into work mode quickly, though Erwin wants nothing more than to you see you naked again, under very different circumstances.
Levi Ackerman: Slight Smut
The first time Levi sees you naked, is probably the first time y'all are having sex or at least during a heavy make out session. With Levi its more of a planned thing
When your relationship gets to the that step, Levi is excited and terrified at the same time. He's not scared at seeing you naked, he is scared of fucking up a big moment
Levi would savor this moment with you. He is in no rush and wants to map out and explore every inch and curvature of your body
Once he finally sees you fully exposed, he's is going to make sure you feel beautiful and wanted. This will be something that Levi keeps ingrained in the back of his mind for the rest of his life.
"It's ok Levi, you can take it off", you murmur, looking down at your partner, his fingers fumbling with the buttons of your shirt. Levi takes a steadying breath. "Are absolutely sure you want this?", he questions again. You move your hands on top of his, helping to ease his tremble. "I'm ready, I want this, I want you", you tell him, voice sincere. Without another word, Levi is quick to take off your shirt, followed to by unclasping of your bra and soon, other than your panties, Levi is looking at your nude body. His eyes rake over you, catching your plump breasts, noting the various scars that you'd gotten from years with the Scouts. He feels his dick harden, you were beautiful. "Gorgeous", he lets out, as his body over lay yours, his own clothes joining yours on the floor. His lips attach to your neck, before he gingerly cups your left boob in his hand, testing the waters. You sigh with pleasure, "I'm not made of glass love, touch me", you moan out. His hands become bolder, feeling every inch of your skin and when he finally gets the courage to slip off your panties, his breath catches in his throat. His steely blue eyes capture yours, "I'm gonna take care of you, don't worry", he tells you, voice gruff from the desire that is pulsating through to his body. And as his fingers slip into your slick inner walls, you knew this was going to be long night.
Jean Kristien:
I see this happening two ways. The first is during a heated make out session and yall throw caution to the wind. The second is accidentally, like if you got injured or he walked into the wrong room
If it’s purely accidental, Jean would be an embarrassed hot mess. His face would as red as a tomato, mumbling an apology before walking into the wall (lol)
If it’s during a more intimate situation, he’d get your permission first, but once it’s given you’re in for it. There’s no stopping him, especially now that the two of you are taking that step
Jean would definitely make sure that you felt comfortable and ready. Even if it was an accident, he’d go out of the way to apologize nicely for his mistake. He doesn’t want to do anything to hurt you
You hiss in pain as you slip your shirt and bra off your upper body. Your injury was in an odd place on your back, making treating it alone difficult. Thus, you sneaked off to an old storage closet, getting some privacy. You groan as you peeled the bandage off, getting ready to put a fresh dressing and ointment on the wound. Just as you were getting ready to apply the paste, the door swung open and in came Jean. You both freeze, staring at each other, you did not expect to get disrupted here. As Jean’s eyes move down, he comes to the realization that you had no clothes on your upper body. His cheeks flushed a brilliant red and he immediately turned around, quickly moving to leave with a quick apology. “Wait”, you shout. Jean pauses for a second. “I’m sorry to ask, but could you please help me with this?”, you ask meekly. You hear an intake of breath, “Are you sure?”, he asks cautiously. “Yes, I know we just started dating, but I’d rather you do it”, you tell him. The door clicks shut softly. “Turn around, I’ll do my best too ah, to uh, not make you..uhm uncomfortable”, Jean stutters out. Once your back is to him, he turns around. Taking the bandage and ointment he works quickly, wrapping you up. “You can get dressed now”, he mumbles, voice barely visible. “Thanks”, you say but groan when you move to put your clothes back on. “Let me help”, Jean states, moving to help. You feel the softness of his finger tips as the brush against your back and shoulders. The feeling making your body warm. “Jean”, you say softly and turn around to look at him. He raises his eyebrows at your face. “Kiss me”, you murmur. He doesn’t hesitate, lips finding yours with ease. Maybe you wouldn’t be leaving the storage closet for some time.
Eren Jaeger: (Reader is bit dominant here) Suggestive Content
With Eren this I feel like is going to be “accidental”, or basically he’s going to claim it was an accident, but he actual does it on purpose (only if yall are in a relationship, he is not gonna do it in a creepy manner)
For some reason I see him as someone who’d steal your towel or purposely spill something on you, forcing you to change or what not. Again he’s only going to this for his partner.
However you catch onto his plan pretty quickly and two can play at this game. You’ll get back at him by teasing him or withholding things like kisses until he relents and apologizes
Eventually this becomes a little tradition for the two of you. Whether it’s him stealing your towel or you accidentally splashing water on him. The two of you enjoy goofing off this way as it leads to some other fun activities
You gasp as the cool liquid comes into contact with your shirt. “I’m so sorry”, you hear Eren exclaim as you take stock of what had happened. “I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going and tripped and now you’re all wet”, he continues, voice innocent enough, but something tells you there’s more to this story. Your eyes narrow as you catch his cheeks flushing red. “Come with me so we can get you a spare shirt”, Eren says, grabbing your arm and pulling you along the hall. Once the two of you are safely in his room do you speak. “You know if you wanted to see me naked, you could have just asked”, you tell him with a slight glare already knowing what that whole situation was about. You had caught Jean and Connie’s snickering on your way out as well as Connie’s not so subtle thumbs up. You see the guilty expression on his face before he has time to make up a story. You sigh, grabbing the spare shirt from his hands before pushing him to the door. “Wait, wait”, he says, tone rushed. “What?”, you ask briskly, wanting nothing more than to get out of this wet shirt. “I’m sorry ok, that wasn’t fair to you��, Eren says, apologizing, regretting his immature actions. “I accept your apology. But next time just ask, don’t act like a two year old”, you tell him. Knowing his apology was sincere, you decided to just take your shirt and bra off for him. You hear his intake of breath as his eyes scan your chest, lingering on your breasts. You step closer, hand reaching down to grasp his pants. “Your turn”, you say with a smirk. Eren complies rather quickly, and before you know it heated desires take over, leaving the two of you completely bare for the other. “Touch me”, you whimper and soon his hands are all your body, lips finding yours. Needless to say the two of you did not make it back to finish lunch.
Armin Artlet: (Slight Smut)
Similar to Levi, he’s not going to see you naked until the two of you are good and ready to make your relationship more physical
He’s a quite nervous the first time, fingers trembling, panicking on the inside. However Armin is still going to treat you well; he’s going to make you feel beautiful and loved
Once the nerves pass, Armin is on cloud nine. He’d never thought someone could feel/ taste this heavenly. He doesn’t want you to put your clothes back on, preferring to keep you naked beside him
Going forward, Armin is going to find any opportunity to have your clothes off your body. Whether it’s bathing together, cuddling, or having sex. The poor boy can get enough of you.
Armin takes a steadying breath as his fingers play with the hem of your shirt; his nerves getting the best of him. “It’s ok love, I want this”, you remind him softly. “Ok”, he huffs out before slowly pulling your shirt off your body. You hear him gasp as shirt falls to the floor, nearly forgotten as Armin’s eyes rake over your nearly nude body. “Breathtaking”, he murmurs, before tentatively moving his hands to cup your breast gently. You sigh with pleasure at the contact. “Can I..erm..may I kiss it?”, Armin questions with a stutter. “Please”, you whine out, wanting noting more than his lips wrapped around your sensitive nipple. A few seconds later your desires are met, and you moan as he sucks your boob into his mouth, his hand fondling the other. His tongue swirls your nipple and you clench your thighs together, trying to create a bit of resistance where you ached so desperately for him. He lifts his head up a moment, catching your movements. “Let me touch you baby”, he says, voice gruff, a new found courage growing within him. “Ok”, you say, nearly inaudible. Armin’s fingers part your underwear, before they find your nearly soaked entrance. His lips connect with your nipple as his digit slips inside you with ease, the pleasure sending shock waves through your body. Tonight was going to be a special night for the both of you.
#attack on titan#attack on titan x reader#aot x reader#aot headcanons#erwin smith x reader#erwin smith#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman#jean kirstein#jean kirstein x reader#eren jeager#eren jeager x reader#armin arlert#armin arlert x reader#aot erwin#aot levi#aot armin#aot eren#aot jean
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
azriel with a mate who’s messy enough they always manage to have something scruffy with their clothing— a collar untucked, a tag poking out, a belt twisted around at the back.
azriel always adores how they never seem to notice. he adores even more the chance to get closer to his love, always silently and politely tucking in tags or smoothing out wrinkles without being asked to — loving how his mate jumps in surprise at his touch but it soothes away into affection in half a moment when they realise who it is <3
#😭 he’s such a softy i swear to god#imagine like doing a beautiful dress reveal and he’s speechless#and as you leave the room to meet the others - he drags you back around the waist for just a moment#‘az? what- woah! i know i look good but keep those hands—‘ and he’s smirking as he pulls back and smooths over the fabric#‘you had a tag sticking out angel’#az is the type that wants to touch his mate as much as he can :’)#i had this thought and i was like it’s sooo very in character but i doubt i will write a fic for it so <3 have this#azriel shadowsinger#azriel#azriel x reader#azriel shadowsinger x reader
139 notes
·
View notes
Text
was once again glancing at the lackadaisy reddit and i genuinely feel a little crazy about how people perceive the wick and mitzi arc from retinue to sneakthief? or, honestly, their arc in general. to act as though wick is some patron saint greatly amuses me when it’s implied by mitzi and the comic that wick had either proposed a business deal himself or had been very amendable to talk about it after their kiss and / or other intimate acts last night … mitzi didn’t pull this out of her ass! she did not put this upon wick randomly. it was something they mutually agreed to do, and given how hard wick tries to wiggle away from the conversation without outright saying no ( aka giving excuses to stall ) i would even guess he essentially already agreed to such a deal, in the throes of passion, only for him to not fully mean it later. this doesn’t mean it was right at all for her to then steal from wick! this isn’t me excusing that! but wick isn’t some poor meow meow either in this scenario, even if he is the ‘lesser’ evil overall.
and tbh i also think the conversation was doomed from the start : wick was horrifically exhausted and was still too shaken up by rocky’s ‘joke’ to fully engage with mitzi, as well as finally having church’s warning start to weigh on him … and then there’s mitzi, who wasn’t faring any better! what with viktor out of commission, asa turning on her, mordecai threatening her, and then having spent most of the afternoon hearing her dead husband’s name be thrown around. in order to hurt her and scare her into obedience, mind you. like, neither were in any state to discuss business or romance!! so it’s no surprise it went poorly. especially when both of them were equally sore and testy during their date.
#my posts.#lackadaisy#anyway i have WAY more to say about this and wick & mitzi’s arc in general but this’ll do#my very illiterate rambles lol#i think the fandom is so enamored with wick that they fail to see he’s someone who is flawed#and someone who ( as tracy’s said a time or two ) isn’t morally superior than the other characters in any way#yet people act as if wick is only some quirky little guy who’s just sooo sweet and that’s it you guys :)#he needs SAVING from the big bad evil woman!!! he is just so blind to her wicked intentions :( he’s being led on …#which to me is so far from the truth. wick had no issue throwing his investors at mitzi for her to schmooze up#and even tried HELPING her schmooze them!! he knew her intentions either the second he got her letter or soon thereafter & was cool with it!#like i love wick so bad but just like rocky there’s a habit of woobifying him …. which is tragic and sad to me#lackadaisy is full of complex characters PLEASE stop dumbing them down into helpless victims who just stand there waiting to be saved!!!#wick can still be complex and a little fucked up and it can still be wrong that mitzi stole from him#him being a flawed character who can and does do wrong doesn’t cancel out mitzi’s bad act#and vice versa#anyway. i love them SO BAD they could never make me hate you wickmitzi#( if none of this makes sense my apologies its 9pm and im sleepy and im overwhelmed by my thoughts about them <3 )
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
Gibeon ruining his relationships partly out of grief over what happened in the past with Lucius, or Gibeon acting the way he does and doing everything because he knows exactly the type of man Lucius is, and knows he won't break a promise or die so easily, and believes he is still alive out there somewhere..
#going insane over lucius and gibeon. it will happen again (promise)#both flavors are very good..#for the longest time my train of thought was more 'gibeon thinks lucius isn't alive anymore'#but now i'm like. maybe he is actually acting like that partly out of his belief that lucius is still alive#and maybe he is just desperate to see him again!! there isn't much time left!#(current train of thought is that gibeon's motivations have to do with wanting to see lucius again and settle things with him)#(whatever that means. i think they were friends who maybe had a disagreement over the rakurium or something..)#anyway.#gibeon ruining his family over some pretty man he befriended decades ago is sooo. it's soo good.#pushing his own son away and later on hurting his own grandson (amethio) because of the past#is it worth it gibeon! do you think lucius would want to see you like that. or are you in so deep that you don't care anymore#the thought that maybe lucius is still alive and stuck in rakua because of what happened with gibeon#so like. maybe these two are keeping each other alive ww what is wrong with them <3#(we still need to know the whole truth but in the meantime i'll entertain these thoughts)#lucius#gibeon#hz071#character notes#episode notes
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
like its so bwerehhhheuhhh that despite being the masterminds santa and june dont get any extra cool reveal sprites the way ace and snake did like Come Onnnnn. also help it made me laugh so hard that they reused snakes crazy sprite the one where his eyes are wide w rage for this stupid random background item examination like i really had so much fun w the humor in this game
#another humor thing i loved abt the game is the amount of swearing it had like god it was so fucking good#cuz im a person who swears a lot im always like What The Fuck so to see my thoughts word by word be repeated by the characters were wjdbsskf#my opinion is that humor is sooo super important in a video game cuz games are Long they are long and immersive#so to be able to laugh during this period is v crucial to me.. and in that regard 999 performed very spectacularly. very fun and funny game
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
One day I'll draw the ieytd cast with all the flower imagery i want
#i think. i think the fact that we all draw the characters so colour coordinated contributes heavily to this#i have SOOO many fucking thoughts you have no idea#specifically some starstruck ones I've had for like a year but blahblahblah im always thinking about them at least a little#it's my fucking that old man yaoi you can pry it from my cold dead hands#but also ughhh i hate the canon ages like SIDE NOTE#okay these tags are abt to go in a wildly different direction basically i am no longer yapping about florography#likeeee prism being 40 canonically makes it weird for me prism is more like. 45-47 for me and reggie is probably like 50-52#juniper also like i know a lot of people say mid 20s but for me?? he's like 37 and DESPARATE not do have a twink death#and then phoenix is probably around the same age as jj??#idk just working off the main 4 guys (to me) i guess but idk ive always had mild issues with the fact prism is canonically 40#it's just. naur.......nuhuh......................#i digress reggie being in his 50s is weirdly important to me and i have NO idea why. maybe I've just been jn this fandom for a while#<- been here on and off since before first class from ieytd 1#i more or less discovered there was a fandom in 2022 tho but sighs. ive been here a WHILE.....#at the very most j was here before seat of power i remember watching a playthrough of that when it released#but in terms of first class my memory gets deeply spotty but thats being a system for ya wayyyyyyyy#wow this ramble went in like 17 directions jf you're still here thank you??????????? why??? /lh#[words words words]#ughh anyways 🤩🤩 ieytd and flowers yeah it's intrinsically linked to me#idk might redesign them all surrounded by flowers but also i literally do not have the time for that <- just started art college
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
I could play one of the most beautiful well crafted video games on the planet and it will never be as appealing to me as one that kind of sucks shit but has soooo much potential
#merlin.txt#just finished cyberpunk#i feel like they could have done sooo much more with the concepts they had#the game showed us a bit of everything in the world but i dont think they explored any one topic enough#and they pulled a ton of punches. the ending did not feel like this big 'grab your allies and fuck the corpos' thing it shouldve been#it was mostly just tying up johnnys loose end. one big loop. which i fuck with; but it wasnt rlly anticapitalist at all in that sense#i have a bunch of other thoughts on johnny but ill save it#but god. the beginning (act 1 and the first bits of act 2) where just soooo fucking good#and it rlly felt like it was going to gear up into this huge thing instead of just being one last hurrah for rogue and johnny#AUUUGHH theres just So Much Potential. goddamn#imo i think the major thing is that at some point it stopped being v's story. it was everyone elses#he has Very little agency. which is interesting but man this guy deserves better#when it comes down to it the game Is really shallow. whenever there is any sincerity in themes its very centrist#the fact is you dont rlly meet many characters in game who are Truly working to take down corps except for johnny and he doesnt rlly count#and if there Are its usually played for irony and laughs (looking at kerry) or theyre flat out kind of awful.#judys story is probably the best of the companions bc shes actively trying to help sex workers and its played very positively#i also think two of the main themes (letting go of the past; what it means to die) are Majorly helped by some incredible emotional beats#and w/o some just Really Really good scenes and good repetition of lines and motifs its very tropey.#ok i wasnt going to write a full thing. but let me be clear: i fucking loved this game. i would not be writing so much if i did not love it#the sun ending was Still soooo vindicating. v is still kicking and that's all that matters to me#(it helps that v is a Great protag like one of the Best voiced rpg protags next to hawke da2)#(which is kind of a funny comparison since i think both protags suffer from a lack of agency)#ok im done now
10 notes
·
View notes
Note
GOOD LUCK in court!! decimate that shitty sister's ex 💖💖💖
Thank you!! It's been A Lot Already, but it's going okay so far. Day 1 of 4!
#we had this birthday party for nephew no 2 yesterday and it was sooo awkward seeing him and a couple of people from his family#his mum came over to me with the toddler my sister's ex has now with the woman who was his mistress#and i'd never met the baby before#and kinda figured i wouldn't care but i had such a visceral reaction to him#i was like i need this baby out of my face#his mum is so manipulative too and she always has been#i'm like ma'am i have known you for 14 years if you think i don't know what you're trying right now you are sorely mistaken#i was very polite though lol#hilariously my sister's ex and his old mistress/now partner are getting married next week too#and the thought of getting married 1 week after you're in court trying to finalise your 1st divorce - - you can't make this stuff up#she was sooo possessive of him at the birthday party too and death glaring my sister the whole time#and my sister was like girl you can HAVE him#anyway good luck to her given the man he is she's really (honestly) going to need it#but nephew no 2 had a good time yesterday which is all that mattered#also i do feel like this entire experience is helping with my character writing at the very least so silver linings haha
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i’ve been trying to get through hoh for literally like a week now but it’s so hard bc the way my fave nico is treated is absolutely ABYSMAL and i know it only gets worse
#personal#even hazel being like ‘yeah he’s hard to get along with’ or whatever she said#every single non-tartarus perspective has had at least one reference to this#and like i understand the reasons it’s not that it’s that it highlights this issue i have with a lot of the characters in that series which#is that i don’t like them. and that’s so different for me bc i actually usually find that my two favorite characters in anything are the tw#that don’t like each other? unrelated to that dynamic usually mostly but still within it#but that’s not even what the dynamic is yk.#and it’s just the whole thing overall like in the last book there was one part where these two characters who are supposed to be good#friends are separated and one makes a comment about how annoying (or something along those lines) she finds the other which.#i’m vaguely aware of what happens in toa so i think you could argue something about that but read on its own bc i don’t want to make that#argument without fully grasping where her character goes#it just kinda reinforces this… vibe to the whole series that was not nearly as present in the first series of like. really overemphasized#like gender roles/heterosexuality/etc. i can’t think of the word to use to describe it. i’ve seen other ppl talk about the parts that add u#to the whole that i’ve seen but never synthesize them. and it really varies between actually insidious and simply not my taste which is par#of the reason i hesitate to make a full critique out of it. but suffice to say i really don’t like it#with that being said the pacing of this book is really good and i am compelled to finish based on the themes i do find interesting#autonomy being a huge one#but anyway those are my thoughts on it after a few days of a break. i’ve been playing a video game instead :3 but i start work on wednesday#sooo i won’t have as much free time boo#looking back maybe ‘insidious’ is a very strong word for it. i’m talking about like when percy complains about the bag and similar moments
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
okay, but i think it is about time to talk about one of misao's fears is, because i believe that they can tell you a lot about a character and their psyche — and i came to tell y'all that the one i'm going to be talking about today is that misao fears becoming a mother / motherhood. the first reason in which why i believe this is because misao just genuinely thinks that she is not the nurturing type and that she would likely be a terrible parent to her child ( which i know is a very depressing thing to think about. but it is something that she has feared for a long time, unfortunately. ) this likely stems from a mix of misao's inability to deal with her own emotions, though, as she feels like it's better to just bottle them up and deal with them all on her own rather than the alternative. and this would be to try to confide in someone and/or get help from them should she need it. so, misao feels as if her child were to come to her needing emotional support from her, she would absolutely fail at it and the last thing she wants is to emotionally neglect someone the way she had been as a child ( p.s. of course, this was mostly just borne out of unfortunate circumstances, as i've stated before because of kaiyah's illness. though this hasn't stopped misao from feeling the brunt of the impact that it had on her. )
plus... i feel as if misao also doesn't have a lot of confidence in herself whenever it comes to the concept of always being able to put a child first, as she has a pretty negative self-image of herself deep down if i'm being honest. she sees herself as an extremely selfish person who can't even become friends with one person because she is so afraid that someone will hurt her, and in her opinion, that makes her pathetic or weak. so she doesn't feel like she'd be able to take care of a child with the amount of responsibility that is required to in order to raise them properly and protect them at the same time.
though this isn't necessarily true as misao has put up those barriers that would normally let people into her heart mostly due to trauma, and having experienced trauma doesn't make anyone weak. i just feel as if she desperately needs to remedy her self-image because it is very damaging to think of yourself like that and it would be really good for her emotional health if she were to try to ways to better cope with everything that she's experienced throughout her life. there are other reasons as well behind why misao fears motherhood while i'm talking about it, however, and these are arguably one of the more bigger ones: the act of giving birth itself and suddenly being thrust into having to not just take care of yourself, but the baby inside of you as well. which sort of makes sense whenever you connect the dots as to how many horror stories misao has heard about delivering a baby and also how much a person's experience while being pregnant can vary from others. i mean, it has been shown that some people may have more morning sickness than others and that they just don't have a very good experience with being pregnant in general, for example. but other's may be 'glowing' as they say and may find it easier to deal with.
so, you never really know what kind of pregnancy you're going to have until you actually become 'with child' as misao would call it. and the unknown aspect surrounding it scares misao more than anything. plus, as it stands now, she isn't sure whether she'd want to go through the process of giving birth as there can be a lot of complications regarding it. but there can also be so many good things about inviting a new member of the family into your home and misao feels as if it is kind of expected of her to have children so she can continue the kanade line.
but misao is just so afraid of it for these reasons that she can not see herself as a mother, even in her head. however... there is the matter of adoption that she has yet to take into account, but with how focused the jorōgumo are about having biological children, i feel as if misao hasn't even considered it to be an option for those who are afraid of giving birth and also to give a baby / child a loving home as everyone deserves one of those. but yeah. i hope that this gave y'all a little more insight into her character, as misao is scared of re-enacting her past in a way, though i feel as if you become a mother yourself... you have to separate what will be your own experience of parenthood from your parents. so, in order to overcome this fear she has, misao would have to treat it as an entirely different thing from kaiyah's experience as a mother and her own child self's experience of her as a mother.
and this is definitely possible. it would just take some work, as overcoming any kind of fear would. plus, i feel as if misao were to accept other people's help it would also benefit her, since discussing motherhood / plunging into the topic of the sometimes seemingly scary thing that is parenthood is definitely not something that you have to try to go through alone.
#ALL POWER DEMANDS SACRIFICE: musings.#NO SLEEP OF THE INNOCENT. NOT FOR YOU: character study.#SOMETIMES AGAINST ALL LOGIC WE HOPE: headcanons.#yeahhh so i know that i keep on posting some pretty heavy things on my pages BUT like i said on my other acc i promise that i will give-#y'all some fluffy content after this JSJSJ but i just had to talk about this because it says a lot about her character and i don't mean tha#in a bad way or anything ofc. i just mean from like a psychological standpoint and i know that motherhood / parenthood can be such a comple#thing to talk about BUT i tried my best to cover all of the reasons as to why misao is afraid of becoming a mother and/or having another-#person to take care of in her home in general. to summarize things her negative self-image and the experience that she has as a child-#regarding how her own mother treated her (though she still VERY much loves kaiyah and knows that she can't really blame her for any of it-#bc of how severe her mental illness was) haunting her in a way as she believes that perhaps she will continue the cycle of emotional neglec#in the family. sooo yeah it is awfully complicated though when you consider that kaiyah did her best to take care of her and that's really-#all you can do as a parent. it is just a very nuanced topic for her but of course that doesn't mean that i hold the same opinion of it as-#misao since you should always separate from the character from the writer but whenever i get in her headspace i feel as if this is the best#way i could describe her fear of it.#tw: trauma.#tw: mentions of emotional neglect.#tw: discussions of pregnancy / motherhood.#tw: fear.#tw: discussions of negative thoughts.
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
playing me again is making me remember my obsession with making up alien races in middle and high school. like that urge has never left but its been so back burnered by everything else im into. however, it is being reignited,
#i thought my aliens were sooo cool#and i had soooo many#but really they were all like. one-note and had no depth.#(and were also all very very similar but sshhhh)#i did have the one setting idea of. what was basically a penal colony planet of a buuunch of different species#and that planet more or less gets abandoned/cut off from the rest of the galaxy#so the people sent there are all left to fend for themselves on this strange world#and its basically just a big excuse for me to put all my aliens into a medieval/dnd-ass setting#and i thought i was a fucking genius for coming up with that#i still really like it and i want to do things with that setting. ONE day.#i kept making maps and coming up with countries for it#but i kept changing my mind on what the maps and countries WERE#so i need to solidify that more lmfao#ONE DAY..........................................#ill also put my boy ach'm in it. i dont think hed be a main character but he could be important#real ones remember ach'm
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i have a complex list of reasons for why jack bottoms, though obviously who give a shit, it's aaaaalllll goooood
#it's always very funny (in the 'this smells funny' way) when you get into a new fandom and find out there's some kind of war of the roses#over who is getting fucked in the butt#like it is Not that critical just have fun!#that said i respect u if u at least Thought about logistics and aren't just basing it on whichever character you're unconsciously kinning#or if you are you had better make it sooo characterful. then i will write you a permit
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
guys i just read the sun and the void why is there zero online content for me to consume
#shep speaks#tsatv#the sun and the void#reading#books#idk#guys okay it had its issues but i read the whole thing in a day#even w the pacing problems like cmon#mild spoilers no direct ones >>>#okay lwk not rlly happy w the final love interest but ig the original one was fucked by the end of the book#but no spoilers but the secondary love interest they had cute moments but she was lwk annoying#like alllllll the characters had pretty big flaws but she was made out to be sooo sweet and kind like#idkkkk i need to process i think#i’ll come back tmmrw ik i dont even post here anymore lmao#but wtv i will yell into the void#but anyways you guys should give it a try ik a lot of people didn’t like the first half bc it was very worldbuildy#but i liked it tbh#also i ddint know there was gay people i literally just thought the cover was cool
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
The difference between how I enjoy Olivia and how I enjoy Jackie is that I like to imagine Olivia dying in deep and symbolic ways that leave a deep scar on the people around her that will still manage to die out before her death can reach its climax and I like to imagine Jackie being hit by a car and exploding
#rat rambles#oni posting#and if you know me youd know that both of these are equally affectionate lol#olivia appeals to me by being am extremely interesting character and a complicated person#and jackie appeals to me by being very easy to boo and throw tomatoes at#theyre both sad divorced middle aged women but jackie is easily the worse of the two and the more pathetic of the two#olivia has deep moral and philisphical crisies and jackie throws a hissy fit over her ex wife throwing a party its not a competition lol#like jackie is such a manchild of a woman and thats exactly why I love her#I do also have serious thoughts feelings and hcs abt her too but those are a result of her growing on me and that was a result of her being#a sad wet cat of a woman who is such a shitty person for no good reason#she had reasons but those are mostly just hand waves nowadays#and even back when she did genuinely believe in doing things for good rather than solely progress it still was shaky reasoning#point being she ruined everything for everyone including herself and it was for no good reason and I love that abt her#also I love my design for her so she gets bonus points by leeching off of my artistic talents or whatever#shes sooo silly actually (incorrect)#olivia is also silly I will forever obsess with 'tiny baby!' and her various puns and jokes as the pod#it rly makes you wonder what they were like back before they were doomed toxic yuri and were simply doomed yuri#I have my hcs ofc but yknow#their date nights were probably just them sitting in a mcdonalds for 17 hours straight discussing theories and doing their college homework#and then their study nights were them getting blackout drunk and crying their eyes out and having gay sex or smth#in the modern day they both absolutely refuse to drink unless theyre home alone they can't trust themselves in the slightest#anyways obligatory 1 am post made time to go to bed and keep being offline as hell
0 notes
Text
beau is such a trailblazer of an oc cause he's the first dallonwrites protagonist to have a good relationship with his family
#LMAOOOO LIKE#i know they're the type of family who would have a group chat together and that concept is so wildly foreign to me#my relationship w my family is actually fine dw it's just like all recovering from things. we make do#felix and dorothy were definitely like the product of me fully realising i had a fucked up childhood and not being able to get therapy#i think my whole pov on it is changing now though which is interesting#like i havent outgrown RR but i would never write the things i decided for that story if i came up with it now#but 20 year old me wanted to write about those things for a reason so it's almost become a time capsule#i actually have sooo many thoughts of this because my brain is so interesting to me lately#recently more often than not i hate reading characters with fucked up childhoods from other writers#idk why but i'm just like. i want the kids left alone for the most part!#some more than others and its like i dont know what the reasoning is because its not like i can know where their inspo is coming from#(that's another thing i want to write about one day because i do think some people esp newer writers like#don't fully know how to write an interesting backstory yet or aren't confident in it so they lean on#very traumatic childhood things like abuse neglect addiction etc.#and without saying what I Went Through it's very interesting when you see things you went through IRL#that for others are just like interesting character development ideas#NOT TO MAKE ANYONE FEEL BAD! because i mean i do and have done it before with things irrelevant to me#it's just something i've noticed and like. i think easy to sensationalise when you're a newer writer#even things you HAVE gone through)#not me testing the waters for essays in the side blog tags again. i need to actually write something for my silly little substack#actually similarly to this i rly want to write abt how i can't get with the whole my old writing is so bad and cringe!!! anymore#bc now i know younger me was in such a scary place and needed those cringey stores#but i need to do it in a specific way bc i dont think that line of thinking is problematic. i just cant do it
0 notes