#i got a trauma after watching this btw
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rrait2q · 1 year ago
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The Hunt (2012) / Mads Mikkelsen as Lucas
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imagine-nerd · 5 months ago
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The fucking disconnect is so real.
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#theo's thoughts#Story time for the people who love reading tags bc I love sharing things in the tags#So I work at a therapeutic day school and this past school year like four school days before Thanksgiving break I was asked a question#The question was if I would be willing to step up and be a long term sub in a middle school classroom#To me this was less of a question and more of a hey we need someone to do this and you're who the assistant teacher asked for#Which cool yeah fine I'll give it a go I really like that person (the assistant teacher who asked for me) and I trust her judgement on this#I was asked and accepted on Thursday. Friday‚ Monday‚ and Tuesday happen. Then three day Thanksgiving break#When we got back from break I was the teacher and it was rough at first and it sure as hell was never easy but I enjoyed it#My formal teacher observation was my boss basically going like so I see you doing all the things and the basis is there#But it's not being followed through on because of behaviors from the most unmedicated classroom I've seen in all my years working education#And now for the summer they're changing 2/3 staff that were in the room and who even knows who the teacher will be (a new hire? Maybe?)#If there truly is a new hire coming in (fed to the wolves immediately btw what a dick move) but that new hire will be the fourth teacher#These kids have had in a year? A year and a half max. The fourth. After the only thing I've been repeatedly told by admin for months#Is that we need to be stable and consistent because we may be these kids' only reliable source of that consistency and stability?#So you're going to have me come in and tell me I've done such a great job and then tell me you're moving me to 'give me a break'#Trauma informed care my fucking ass. I hope those kids raise fucking hell over it.#The brutal satisfaction of watching your own crops burn and knowing that the invaders will starve is great and all but these are kids!#They're barely just about to be teenagers (11 at the youngest and 14 at the oldest) and this is what you're going to do to them?#Yes they can be complete assholes and are often dicks to one another but they're in our school for a fucking reason? I don't get it.#Then two hours later after being told abt the change‚ the clinical director puts me as one of the three main recipients in an email#Saying that there's going to be a new student starting in that room in the summer and the real icing on the cake?#This all happens on last day before summer break. we're out of session for two weeks now and you're just dropping these changes on us now?#God I'm so fucking tired
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ryliith · 9 days ago
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I know nothing about Critical Role. These are some characters' impressions I got based on fanart
• fabulously dressed lavender tiefling ready to slay
• twin(?) elven siblings with long-ass generic pill names. I think archwizard Xanax and magister Ibuprofen are an actual part of their bloodline.
• unhinged little goblin that laughs in the face of gender identity
• that one two-colored half-orc that is tuskless(?) for some reason so I'm assuming Trauma™
• pink-haired Greenpeace firbolg
• that one ginger human wizard (?) that gets shipped with EVERY. SINGLE. CHARACTER in this damn fandom. Seriously, he gets passed around like a blunt. Also, I've never seen a single fanart of that man where he doesn't look absolutely MISERABLE, so I'm assuming he's some kind of depressed Victorian child.
I love DnD and I'm about to watch Critical Role for the first time after years spent seeing fanart made by the fandom without having any context. This are the characters I know about so far, and I've got no idea if this is the right impression or not. NOBODY CORRECT ME, I have to figure it out on my own. ( Btw I've no idea how many campaign this has or what season each character is from.)
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astonmartinii · 5 months ago
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girl, so confusing | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x fem norris!reader
will "norstappen" will work it out on the remix?
note: obvs everything here is hearsay and all a big fat joke i am just venting my frustrations with whatever the fuck lando just said after that race
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR |
- part of the brother's best friend series -
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yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri and 783,049 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: we don't just let people by because we have a big lead in the championship (that's actually how you end up with a big lead) btw.
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user5: WELCOME BACK OUTWARDLY BITCHY Y/N I'VE MISSED YOU
user6: the atmosphere shifted, my skin has cleared and the birds are singing
user7: i didn't think it would be against her own brother BUT WE'LL TAKE WHAT WE CAN GET
maxverstappen1: can you do all my media for me - you give a lot better sound bites than i ever could
yourusername: all my sound bites would be completely unusable
yourusername: cause if they thought you had a potty mouth oh boy they have another thing coming
danielricciardo: it's true i was around her when she stubbed her toe once, it was like shakespeare but concerning
alexalbon: or that one referee against chelsea, i've never heard so many creative insults
maxverstappen1: okay but my thoughts exactly
yourusername: twitter would cancel me baby
maxverstappen1: everyone wants cunty f1 back until i make contact and you ... open your mouth?
user8: not like all of lando's friends either being in the likes or the comments
user9: bro is fighting for his life in the GC after that press run
user10: i think y/n got all the sass cause lando that was not the diva statement you thought it was
landonorris: before you delete i already sent it to mum
yourusername: i'm not deleting it you big baby you gotta stand on your words bro
landonorris: nuh uh
yourusername: i can feel you pouting YOUR 24 YEARS OLD
landonorris: but i'm still your baby brother
yourusername: not with this PR strategy
landonorris: MAX WAS IN THE WRONG
yourusername: 1. i watched the ten laps before lando i'm not dumb 2. i support his rights and wrongs 3. you still won driver of the day and i thought that's what meant the most to you
user11: oh she gagged him
user12: can we get a rupaul's drag race reading challenge in f1 but it's just y/n reading the drivers PLEASE
charles_leclerc: literally all you have to do is spend 10 minutes with her in the paddock
maxverstappen1
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liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername and 1,304,599
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: still got my favourite norris on side and that's all that matters
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user13: someone check on lando cause DIVA IS DOWN
user14: diva is dead and buried at this point
user15: they're dancing on diva's grave
landonorris: DO YOU PEOPLE MIND ???
maxverstappen1: who is this random fan in my comments?
landonorris: i'm definitely not a fan of yours after this weekend
maxverstappen1: oh then let me add you to my block list
charles_leclerc: i thought unfollowing each other after a race in austria was our thing max :(
maxverstappen1: yes that's why i'm going to block him not just unfollow
charles_leclerc: oh good 😊
yourusername: and that's why i'm ready to get rid of the name altogether
maxverstappen1: i think you suit verstappen so much more anyway
yourusername: i'm ready when you are
landonorris: really? ENGAGEMENT TALK ON A POST THAT DISSES ME
yourusername: a diss? you don't want your sister to be happy? or am i not your sister anymore since max isn't your friend anymore?
landonorris: IT WAS ONE QUOTE LIKE TEN MINUTES AFTER BEING CRASHED OUT OF THE LEAD
yourusername: * second-place
landonorris: STOP IT
yourusername: don't dish it if you can't take it buddy
user16: not this brocedes era for max and lando
yourusername: @lewishamilton @nicorosberg i am so sorry they're minimising your trauma like this
user17: so real of you
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yourusername
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liked by alexalbon, maxverstappen1 and 934,098 others
tagged: maxverstappen1 & landonorris
yourusername: when you forgot that you invited your boyfriend to stay at the family home before the british grand prix and arranged a big family dinner and the flight back to england and your boyfriend and brother decide to try and kill each other in the race and have now 'ended' their friendship.... relatable!
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user21: the footage... GIVE IT TO ME, SHOW IT TO ME RACHEL
yourusername: most excruiting three hours of my life boys are so dramatic
user22: shock horror mad max and norrif are holding grudges
yourusername: IF i didn't have the patience of a saint i would've gone mad max on their asses and mclaren would've been down a driver
user23: out here threatening the victim and not the aggressor
yourusername: now why would i attack my trophy husband?
landonorris: i didn't make the plane ride awkward HE MADE THE PLANE RIDE AWKWARD
yourusername: we tried to nap but the heat from your death glare kept us up
landonorris: THAT'S NOT MY FAULT
yourusername: it's kind of expressly your fault, you could've taken your anger out on a pillow or a 12 piece wing meal like a normal person
landonorris: max's jet doesn't offer wings
maxverstappen1: get your own jet then
yourusername: @ryanair we have a new customer for you
landonorris: NO I'M SORRY
maxverstappen1: finally
landonorris: just for your jet not having wings, you're still the one in the wrong overall
user24: i fear lando may not see his sister back in the mclaren garage for the rest of the season
user25: i mean she looks better in blue anyway
liked by maxverstappen1
oscarpiastri: can we please move on lando your attitude is stinking up the gaff
landonorris: 1. wtf osc you're meant to be on my side 2. where the fuck did you learn that
oscarpiastri: while you've been sulking in your childhood bedroom i've been taking in the normal norris hospitality
yourusername: he'll get over it he did this all the time when we were younger - he'll come back and join when dinner is finished
landonorris: TELL MAX TO APOLOGISE
yourusername: i guess you don't want any of these profiteroles then ...
maxverstappen1: i'm eating them all lol
landonorris: FINE GOD DAMN
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landonorris
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 1,674,099 others
tagged: maxverstappen1 & yourusername
landonorris: i think i just got gentle parented (brought matching jellycats) into forgiving max
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user28: about fucking time
user29: baby had his first real dose of wheel to wheel racing for a win and wanted to throw away a friendship
user30: good thing his sister never knows when to shut the fuck up and humbled these men cause lord knows without her lando would still be chatting shit in the media
yourusername: someones got to make sure lando doesn't embarrass himself (idk where his PR department went but mclaren need to run me my money)
maxverstappen1: girl, so confusing when you literally forget all about it as soon as we got you the jellycat you wanted
landonorris: i am a little brother first and foremost
yourusername: hard on the little you've been acting like a whole ass five year old
landonorris: have you ever thought that maybe i'm acting out because i miss you now you've moved in with max and wanted matching jellycats so we always have a part of each other??
yourusername: awww really???
maxverstappen1: that's actually kind of cute
maxverstappen1: and a hunk of BULLSHIT
landonorris: FINE I'M PETTY BUT I WANTED TO WIN SUE ME
maxverstappen1: well i also wanted to win so that's not the serve you think it is
yourusername: you only 'forgave' him because you saw that max was playing padel with charles
landonorris: umm yes obviously, i can't let lestappen be a real thing
yourusername: why not that's literally my dream threesome
yourusername: WHAT WHO SAID THAT
yourusername: lando i think your comment section is haunted
charles_leclerc: well i'm ... flattered
landonorris: you can have lestappen you weirdo
maxverstappen1: @charles_leclerc stop being flattered i don't share
yourusername: heheheheh
landonorris: that much is obvious... you couldn't let me win once?
maxverstappen1: no!
yourusername: no!
fin: here's a lil quick one today cause i had some free time! i am working on guilty as sin p4 but i'm so so so busy and i do be going to silverstone on wednesday xx hope you enjoyed !!!
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malkaviian · 2 years ago
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im writing zachary's backstory and man im tempted as hell to make maverick a part of it
#basically; if i make him a part of it: maverick killed him due to his obsessive behavior; but it was in self-defense#because zachary tried to kill him first with a dagger; he just got lucky to be able to grab the dagger and attack#however when he realized what happened hours after and while watching his dead body; his mind did a complete change to deal with it#he ended up as obsessive as zachary was with him but with other people; and developed his autassassin0philia#the trauma of being nearly killed because someone just 'loved' him that much now turned into the most hot and romantic situation he everwas#and now he desperately wants to be in that situation again with someone he 'loves'; and actually end up being murdered.#if his obsession kills him that means they truly love him right? that's what zachary tried to do after all; and he loved him#once again: any posts involving maverick end up being REALLY dark#now with someone else that isnt samael!!#thats how zachary ended up being a demon btw he got killed and a demon wanted to have his body; so they did a pact and their souls got mixe#but as part of the pact he cannot remember at all his childhood and teenage years#his memories start at 21 y/o in college; and even then he misses basic details like which career he was studying or past friend's names#he doesnt even remembers how many crushes he had in college before maverick appeared in his life; he thinks it was like 7?#but he cant say for sure. he only clearly remembers the events that eventually led to his death#starting from when he first talked to maverick. the whole obsession and stalking and stuff.#and the thing he remembers the most vividly is being repeatedly stabbed and then having his throat slit by him. all the pain he felt#now his obsessive tendencies got toned down due to the demon's influence; but he still has his twisted version of what love is#i mean; he always was a little bit obsessive. but with maverick is when he got the worst#and fully developed his thoughts that anything is valid if it is for love; regardless of how immoral your actions can get#oc talk#ask to tag#you know what im going to make this canon; this is fucked up and i like it
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nyrasvoid · 2 months ago
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Through Love and Sorrow
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♡︎ Gwayne Hightower x Fem!Reader
𖤓 Summary: After the joy of expecting their first child is shattered by a devastating miscarriage, Gwayne Hightower returns home to find his wife consumed by grief.
⚝ Warnings: Angst, Miscarriage, Grief, Hurt/Comfort, Pregnancy Insecurities, Emotional Trauma.
⚝ A/N: this fic also includes a kinda mother-son relationship between reader and Daeron,btw sorry I haven’t posted anything in like two weeks lmao
-Word count: ≈4.4k
This fanfic is a request from a while ago (link)
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You sat in your room, the sunlight pouring through the tall windows. Your hands moved skillfully with the needle and thread, working on a small attire—a delicate onesie you had lovingly made for your child, your first with Gwayne.
As you finished the final stitch, you glanced at the door, eager for Gwayne’s return. You had planned carefully how to share the wonderful news with him, and now the moment had arrived.
The door creaked open, and Gwayne stepped in, looking tired but his face brightening when he saw you. “My love,” he greeted, coming over to kiss your cheek. “You look especially happy today. What’s going on?”
You smiled and took his hand, guiding him to sit beside you. “I’ve been working on something,” you said. “And I want to show you.”
Gwayne watched as you pulled the small onesie from behind your back and placed it in his hands. His brow furrowed for a moment in confusion before realization dawned on him. He looked up at you, his eyes wide with disbelief and excitement.
“Is this…?” he started, his voice full of wonder.
You nodded, unable to keep the smile from your face. “Yes, Gwayne. We’re going to have a babe.”
He stared at you for a moment, the onesie still in his hands as if he couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing.
Then, without warning, he pulled you into his arms, laughing with joy. “A babe! We’re going to have a child!” His voice was full of emotion, his grip on you tightening as he buried his face in your neck. “Gods, I’m the luckiest man alive.”
You laughed with him, feeling the warmth of his love surround you. He pulled back slightly, cupping your face in his hands as he kissed you deeply, then gently placed his hand on your belly. “I can’t believe it,” he whispered, as he got on one knee to kiss your barely swollen belly
“We’ll have a little one running around soon, with your beauty and wit,” Gwayne continued, his voice thick with emotion as he caressed your belly, where your child was beginning to grow. “We’ll teach them everything—how to ride, how to wield a sword, everything. I’ll be by your side through it all.”
You smiled, leaning into his touch. “And I’ll make sure they know how to be kind and strong, like their father.”
Gwayne laughed softly, his eyes sparkling with the kind of happiness that made your heart swell. “And stubborn like their mother, I’m sure.”
The days following the joyful news were some of the happiest of your life. Gwayne was attentive and loving, always making sure you had everything you needed, always talking about the future and the life you would build together. But as time went on, you began to be more worried and insecure.
The other ladies at court had spoken to you, sharing their experiences with childbirth—how their bodies had changed, how their husbands had sometimes seeked comfort elsewhere during those vulnerable weeks after the birth. They’d laugh softly, as if it were just a fact of life, but their words dug deep into your mind, planting seeds of doubt and fear.
You found yourself pulling away from Gwayne, unsure of how to voice your fears. He would come to you with that familiar smile, eager to talk about the babe or to spend time with you, but you would turn away, offering only brief responses, avoiding his touch.
It was not that you loved him any less—if anything, your love for him had only grown deeper—but the fear of losing him, of not being enough, was paralyzing.
One night, as you lay beside him in bed, the silence stretched on longer than usual. Gwayne finally turned to you, concern evident in his voice. “Darling, what’s wrong? You’ve been so distant lately. Have I done something to upset you?”
You stared up at the ceiling, your heart pounding in your chest. You didn’t want to say it, didn’t want to reveal the insecurities that had taken hold of you. But Gwayne was insistent, turning onto his side and taking your hand in his. “Please, my love. Talk to me.”
The words came slowly, hesitantly, as you struggled to express your feelings. “I… I’ve heard the other ladies at court talk,” you began, whispering.
“About how their bodies changed after childbirth, how they couldn’t… couldn’t be with their husbands for weeks, sometimes longer. And how their husbands…” You swallowed hard, unable to finish the thought.
Gwayne’s grip on your hand tightened as he waited for you to continue, his eyes fixed on your face, his worry deepening.
“They said their husbands sought comfort in other women,” you finally confessed, your voice breaking. “In whores. And I—I’m afraid, Gwayne. I’m afraid that I’ll change, that I won’t be… enough for you anymore. That you’ll look elsewhere.”
For a moment, there was silence. You didn’t dare look at him, too ashamed of the words you had spoken. But then Gwayne did something you didn’t expect. He started to laugh—a soft, warm chuckle that caught you off guard.
You turned to him, confused and a little hurt. “Gwayne, this isn’t funny—”
“No, no, it’s not that,” he said quickly, his laughter fading as he saw the tears in your eyes. He leaned in, brushing his lips against your forehead. “It’s just… the thought of me with anyone else is absurd. My love, you are my heart, my soul. There is no one in this world who could ever compare to you.”
You opened your mouth to protest, but he silenced you with a gentle kiss. “Listen to me,” he said, his tone serious now. “You are the only woman I want, the only woman I will ever want. The idea of seeking pleasure in someone else when I have you is ridiculous. Those other men—they’re fools. I would never betray you, never.”
You felt a rush of relief at his words, though the doubt still lingered. “But what if—”
“No what-ifs,” Gwayne interrupted, his hand moving to cup your cheek. “I swear to you, on every star in the sky, that I will never stray. And if any man tells you differently, I’ll knock his teeth out.”
A small laugh escaped you, despite yourself. Gwayne grinned, his eyes twinkling as he saw the smile return to your face. “See? There’s that smile I love so much. You’re going to be a wonderful mother, and we’re going to be a wonderful family. No matter what changes, I’ll be right here, by your side.”
That night, the two of you found solace in each other, and as you drifted off to sleep, you felt the fears that had plagued you begin to disappear, replaced by the strength of your bond and the love you shared.
---
A few weeks later, you, Gwayne, and Daeron sat at the dining table, enjoying a simple meal. Daeron was telling you about his day, his young face alight with enthusiasm as he described his lessons and adventures. You smiled fondly at him, listening intently as he spoke about a new bird he had seen in the gardens.
“And then it swooped down, right in front of me! I almost thought it would land on my shoulder like the falcons do on their keepers,” Daeron said, eyes wide with excitement.
Gwayne chuckled, ruffling the boy’s hair. You laughed softly, reaching out to squeeze Daeron’s hand. “You’re already quite the little adventurer. Perhaps one day you’ll ride with your uncle on his journeys.”
Daeron’s face lit up at the thought, and he looked eagerly at Gwayne. “Will you take me with you one day, Uncle?”
Gwayne smiled, “One day, certainly. But I’m afraid I have to leave again in three days’ time for an important matter in Blackcrown. I’ll only be gone for a month, maybe less.”
You felt a pang of worry at his words, though you did your best to hide it. You had hoped he wouldn’t need to leave again so soon, but you understood the responsibilities that came with his position. “Just promise me you’ll be back well before the babe is due,” you said. “I don’t want to have to deliver without you.”
Gwayne took your hand across the table, squeezing it reassuringly. “I’ll be back in plenty of time, I promise. Nothing could keep me from being here for you and our child.”
Daeron looked between the two of you, his eyes filled with a mix of concern and curiosity. “You’ll come back safe, right, Uncle?”
“Of course, Daeron,” Gwayne replied with a warm smile. “I’ll be back before you even have time to miss me.”
True to his word, Gwayne departed three days later. You and Daeron saw him off, Daeron clutching his uncle’s hand until the very last moment, and you pressing a kiss to Gwayne’s lips, trying to ignore the uneasy feeling in your heart. As Gwayne rode away, you couldn’t help but feel a little sadness, but you reminded yourself that he would be back soon, that everything would be alright.
In the days and weeks that followed, you busied yourself with preparations for the babe. You spent hours knitting tiny clothes and blankets, imagining the child that would soon be in your arms. Daeron often kept you company, helping you with small tasks or just sitting nearby, chatting about his day.
One afternoon, you decided to take a walk in the woods with Daeron. The two of you had grown close over the years, and you cherished the bond you shared. As you walked along the familiar paths, Daeron spoke of his lessons.
“Auntie,” he began after a moment of comfortable silence.
Just as you were about to respond, a sharp, sudden pain shot through your abdomen, stealing your breath. You gasped, clutching at your belly as the pain intensified, bringing you to your knees.
“Auntie?” Daeron’s voice was laced with panic as he rushed to your side. “What’s wrong? What’s happening?”
The pain was unbearable, radiating through your entire body. You could barely find the words, but you managed to gasp, “Daeron, get help. Quickly.”
Daeron hesitated, his face pale with fear, but then he nodded. “I’ll be right back. Stay here, I’ll get help.” With that, he sprinted back toward the keep, his small legs carrying him as fast as they could.
You were left alone in the woods, the cold earth beneath you as the pain continued to wrack your body. You knew, deep down, that something was terribly wrong. Fear gripped you as you realized you might be losing the baby. Your heart ached with the thought, but there was nothing you could do except wait.
By the time help arrived, the miscarriage had already happened. The maids and guards who found you tried to help, but the damage was done. The life that had been growing inside you was gone, leaving you with an overwhelming sense of loss and emptiness.
Ignoring the advice of the maesters, who urged you to rest and be carried back to the keep, you walked on your own, numb to the world around you. The only thing on your mind was the baby you had lost and how Gwayne would react when he found out. You couldn’t bear the thought of seeing the disappointment in his eyes, even though you knew it wasn’t your fault.
Once you reached the keep, you went straight to the nursery. The small room that had been filled with so much hope and joy now felt empty and desolate. You sat down on the edge of the small bed, your hands trembling as you picked up the half-finished blanket you had been knitting for the babe.
Days passed in a blur. You couldn’t bring yourself to leave the nursery or eat. The maids came and went, offering food and kind words, but you paid them no mind. The world outside the nursery seemed to fade away, leaving you alone with your grief.
Daeron was the only one who could get through to you, even if just a little. He would visit you every day, sitting beside you and talking about anything and everything. His presence was a small comfort, a reminder that you were not entirely alone, even in your darkest moments.
One afternoon, Daeron came to the nursery as usual. He looked at you with concern. “Auntie, you have to eat something. The maesters say it’s important. Uncle Gwayne wouldn’t want you to get sick.”
You shook your head, still clutching the blanket. “I’m not hungry, Daeron. I just… I can’t.”
Daeron sighed, sitting down beside you. “I know you’re sad. I miss the babe too, even though I never got to meet them. But Uncle Gwayne will be back today. Maybe… maybe he can help you feel better.”
You didn’t respond, the weight of your grief pressing down on you. But Daeron’s words lingered in your mind. Gwayne was coming home. You weren’t sure how you would face him, how you would tell him about the baby, but you knew you couldn’t avoid it forever.
Daeron leaned in and gave you a hug, his small arms wrapped around you tightly. “I love you, auntie. And Uncle Gwayne does too. Don’t forget that.”
His simple words brought tears to your eyes, and you hugged him back. “I love you too, Daeron. Thank you.”
Daeron smiled up at you, his eyes full of warmth and understanding. He squeezed your hand before standing up to leave. “I’ll go and make sure everything is ready for Uncle Gwayne’s return. I’ll come back later, alright?”
You nodded, watching as he left the room. Alone again, you stared down at the blanket in your lap, running your fingers over the soft fabric. You had poured so much love into this tiny piece of cloth, and now it felt like a cruel reminder of what you had lost.
Hours later, you heard footsteps approaching the nursery. Your heart clenched with a mix of dread and longing. The door creaked open, and Gwayne entered, his expression filled with concern and urgency.
“My love?” His voice was soft, but it was filled with worry. He rushed to your side, kneeling before you as he gently took your hands in his. “Daeron told me… told me what happened.”
The tears you had been holding back finally spilled over, and you couldn’t stop them. “I lost the babe, Gwayne,” you choked out, your voice breaking. “I’m so sorry… I’m so, so sorry.”
Gwayne’s eyes filled with pain, but he quickly pulled you into his arms, holding you close as you wept. “Shh, it’s not your fault, my love. You have nothing to be sorry for,” he murmured, his voice soothing as he stroked your hair.
“I feel like I failed you,” you sobbed, clinging to him as if he were the only thing keeping you grounded. “I couldn’t protect our child…”
Gwayne pulled back just enough to look into your eyes, his own filled with unwavering love and determination. “Love, listen to me. You did nothing wrong. Nothing. You could never fail me, and this… this is not your fault. It was beyond our control, and I don’t blame you for a single moment.”
You searched his face, looking for any hint of disappointment or anger, but all you found was love and compassion. He kissed your forehead, his lips lingering there as he whispered, “We’re still young, my love. We have time, and we will have children—many, I hope. But right now, all that matters is you. I’m here for you, and we’ll get through this together.”
His words were like a balm to your wounded heart, easing some of the pain that had consumed you. You nodded, resting your head against his chest as you let out a shuddering breath. “I love you, Gwayne,” you whispered.
“And I love you,” he replied, holding you tightly. “More than anything in this world. We will get through this, I promise you that.”
Gwayne held you close for what felt like an eternity, letting you cry, letting you release the pain you’d been holding onto since the miscarriage. His presence was a steady comfort, a reminder that you weren’t alone, that he would be there for you no matter what.
After a long while, Gwayne pulled back slightly, brushing the tears from your cheeks with his thumb. “Come, my love,” he said gently. “Let’s get you out of here. We don’t have to stay in this room. We can go anywhere you’d like—anywhere that will bring you peace.”
You hesitated, looking around the nursery. The room had once been a place of joy and anticipation, but now it felt suffocating, a reminder of the loss you had suffered. You nodded slowly, realizing that staying here would only prolong your grief.
“Alright,” you whispered, letting him help you to your feet. You wavered slightly, still feeling weak, but Gwayne was there to steady you, his arm wrapped securely around your waist.
As you left the nursery together, you found yourself leaning on Gwayne more than ever before. He didn’t mind, guiding you gently through the halls of the keep, away from the place that had brought you so much pain. He led you to your chambers, where a fire had been lit, casting a warm, comforting glow over the room.
Gwayne helped you sit by the fire, then knelt beside you, taking your hands in his again. “You don’t have to be strong right now,” he said softly. “Let me take care of you.”
You nodded, too drained to argue, too weary to pretend that you could handle this on your own. Gwayne stayed by your side, talking to you quietly, telling you stories from his travels, stories meant to distract you, to bring a small smile to your face. He was patient, understanding, never pushing you to talk about the miscarriage, but always offering comfort in whatever way he could.
A few days later, when you had gathered enough strength to leave your chambers, Gwayne took you out to the gardens. The air was crisp, and the scent of blooming flowers filled your senses. It was a welcome change from the stifling atmosphere of the keep.
As you walked together, Gwayne kept his arm around you, his presence a steady reassurance. You were quiet for a while, lost in your thoughts, but eventually, Gwayne broke the silence.
“Do you remember the first time we walked through these gardens?” he asked, a hint of a smile in his voice.
You looked up at him, nodding slowly. “I do. You tried to impress me with your knowledge of every flower and plant.”
He chuckled softly. “And I failed miserably, didn’t I? You knew more about the flowers than I did.”
“You were charming, though,” you admitted, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I fell in love with you that day.”
Gwayne’s smile widened, and he pressed a kiss to your temple. “And I’ve been falling in love with you every day since.”
As you continued to walk, you felt some of the tension ease from your shoulders. The pain of losing the babe was still there, and you knew it would take time to heal, but with Gwayne by your side, you felt a glimmer of hope.
Later that evening, as you sat by the fire in your chambers, Gwayne brought out a small wooden box. “I have something for you,” he said, his tone soft, almost hesitant.
You looked at him curiously as he handed you the box. When you opened it, you found a delicate necklace inside, the pendant a small, intricately carved locket.
“It belonged to my mother,” Gwayne explained. “She gave it to me before she passed, and I’ve kept it all these years. I was waiting for the right moment to give it to you.”
Tears welled in your eyes as you looked at the beautiful locket, your heart swelling with emotion. “Gwayne, it’s beautiful,” you whispered.
He took the locket from the box and fastened it around your neck, his fingers brushing against your skin as he did so. “I wanted you to have something that reminds you that you’re never alone,” he said, his voice filled with tenderness. “Whenever you feel lost, or when the grief feels too much, just remember that I’m here, and that I’ll always be here.”
You touched the locket, feeling the cool metal beneath your fingers, and nodded. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “I’ll treasure it always.”
Gwayne smiled, as he leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips, a kiss that was filled with the promise of a future together, a future that, despite the loss you had endured, would still be full of love and hope.
In that moment, you knew that with Gwayne by your side, you could face whatever challenges life threw your way. The grief would not disappear overnight, and the road to healing would be long, but you would walk it together, hand in hand, and eventually, you would find peace.
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P.S: i’m sorry my paragraphs look so separated but I have bad eyesight and I can’t read it well if I don’t separate lmao
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the-flaneur · 22 days ago
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the enemy of my friend is my enemy, but he's also his own worst enemy? so he's my friend? (nr6) | pt2
pairing: nico rosberg x hamilton!reader [smau]
summary: in an attempt to plan a surprise birthday party for your brother's 39th birthday, you enlist the help of his ex-??? to get into his apartment
warnings: none (i think)
[prev] [masterlist] [requests]
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f1gossipofficial
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liked by user1, user2, user3 and others
f1gossipofficial well apparently three of our drivers have been spotted in monaco alongside a broken down car and a number of balloons. they were also spotted quickly getting into a tinted window car. we wonder who the driver of the second car is?
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user1 damnnn they're looking fine today 🤤🤤🤤
user2 finally someone feeding us gossip worthy content, istg this year has been sooooo boring, like where's the spice (but this barely counts btw, someone do something more entertaining lol) user3 but like who were the balloons for??? cause there was A LOTTTTTT and none of their birthdays are soon? user4 nah watch it be like an ex-girlfriend of all of them, the f1 dating pool is a puddle 💀💀💀
user5 lol the amount of people who immediately flocked to the car after seeing them get out of it, like if it was anyone else, those rich people would be honking the hell out of them lol
user6 nah fr fr, like a supercar just stopped bang smack in the middle of a busy monaco street, but everyone cares more about taking pics of the drivers and themselves with the car 🤣🤣
user7 i wonder why they're all together, usually post-padel we never get any interactions of them together, only max and lando
user8 lol stalker level insight right here
user9 that other car is smexy as hell 😻😻😻
user10 ikrrrrr like someone hook me up with a sugar daddy so i can get a nice car collection user11 nah that driver is probs just another wannabe businessman or entrepreneur 😖 user12 lol just watch it be some random ass youtuber pandering for views
user13 OK SOMEONE PLEASE BE AS DELUSIONAL AS ME AND TELL ME THAT'S NICO ROSBERG'S CAR
user14 girlie pop wtf user15 nah she might actually be onto something, istg nico mentioned on insta that he got a new car that looks superrr similar to the one in the pic 🤔
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f1gossipofficial well apparently someone was able to get a view inside the car as the drivers opened the door to get in, and apparently nico rosberg was the one driving the car 😱😱😱 stay tuned for more updates
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user16 OH MY OH MY GODDDDD GUYS IS THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT NOW, SOMEONE PINCH ME RN OMG
user17 ya'll he's BACKKKKKKKK WITH THE F1 GRID user18 GUYS WE'VE BEEN ROBBED FOR YEARS OF A POST NICO ROSBERG CASUAL HANGOUT WITH THE REST OF THE GRID 😭😭😭😭😭
user19 damnnnn this man has aged like fine wine
user20 even with the brocedes trauma, both men are looking great in their late 30s 😙
user21 since when did charles and lando be so like...friendly with rosberg? he's never been on the grid with them... 🤨🤨
user22 i mean he does do the post race interviews, but even that's a bit too professional to have any like "friendship" user23 yeah...interesting.... 🤔 user24 idk maybe recently they've just been able to have more conversations? i mean they all live in monaco, and ig theres not that many places where you wont bump into an f1 driver 🤷🤷
user25 guys does this mean we're getting a y/n nico reunion??? cause the three of them said they were going to visit y/n
user26 nah that was probably as a joke ngl, like they probably saw her earlier today or something 👁️👄👁️ user27 yeah im sure it means absolutely nothing user28 lol famous last words amirite 🙏🙏🙏
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y/n.hamilton guess which rats im babysitting tonight in monacoooooo 🐀🐀🐀
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user29 Y/N MOTHER WITH HER GRID CHILDRENNNNNN, I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOUR ❤️❤️❤️
user30 i love her so muchhhh, she just brings the energy all the time user31 i need her in the paddock next year, cause we've been robbed this year of content 😿 user32 fr fr like i need to see my women decked out in her multi team fits complete with a hamilton jersey 💋💋💋
user33 AHHHH THE BOYS LOOKING REALLY GOOD WITH THEIR GIRL TONIGHT
user34 she literally has the cutest friendship with them <3
user35 wait ya'll....is anyone connecting the dots like i am 🕵️🕵️🕵️
user36 ❓❓❓ user37 guys wasn't nico just with them...🧐
user38 OH MY GOD OH MY GOD GUYS I THINK MY HEART JUST MIGHT EXPLODE?!?!?!?!?
user39 GUYS IS IT TRUE??? NICO AND Y/N REUNION IN 2023 🤭🤭
user40 YA'LL WE'RE FINALLY GETTING THE BRIT AND BRAT DUO BACK??? GUYS THIS IS TRULY A CULTURAL PHENOMENON FOR THE ELITE 🔥😍🔥😍🔥😍🔥
user41 GUYS 2016 Y/N-NICO TRUTHERS ARISE ONCE AGAIN, WE'VE BEEN DEAD FOR TOO LONG 🙏🙏🙏 user42 guys...i don't think i can be normal after this 🥴🥴🥴
user43 DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY PICTURES OR VIDEOS OF THEM TOGETHER, YOUR HONOUR PLEASE 😭 THIS IS THE ONLY TIME I WILL APPROVE OF PAPARAZZI CAUSE I NEED TO SEE WITH MY PHYSICAL EYEBALLS THAT Y/N AND NICO HAVE SEEN EACH OTHER
user44 😳😳😳 i hate to say it....BUT LOWKEY SAME PLS SOMEONE DO UR THING
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permanent f1 taglist (comment or msg me to join)
@charlesgirl16 @tallrock35 @sweate-r-weathe-r @unlikelystay @alex-wotton
@daisyfreecs @euphorihan @louloucs @oikarma
enemy or friend (this) series taglist (comment or msg me to join)
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© the-flanuer || do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platform.
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proudfreakmetarusonikku · 18 days ago
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to people who don’t know c!tommy lore btw, here’s a quick tl;dr.
he is a fictional character. he’s not real life TommyInnit. none of this applies to real life TommyInnit to my knowledge idk I don’t watch him. maybe he died and came back to life due to black magic idk but it’d be unrelated to c!Tommy anyway.
quick summation of his personality is that he's basically like the most loud fucking obnoxious little brat ever but he’s also got a big heart. he’s great. 10/10.
he's also a child soldier who suffered through severe child abuse and a whole lot of other shit. his trauma was suprisingly really well portrayed for a sixteen year old RPing their oc in minecraft. basically his whole Thing is that he was a traumatised teenager who wasn’t a perfect victim but was still written really sympathetically. his fanbase is mostly mentally ill trauma survivors from all I’ve seen bc of that.
despite that, for some fucking reason his canonical ending is killing himself after saying all he wants is a simple life, Getting That In The Afterlife, and being bffsies with his abuser. total tonal whiplash, sudden ableism, it’s a nightmare and makes zero sense.
real life tommyinnit talks about this being the start of another arc he has planned and is pissed at people being weird about c!tommy in chat. this arc is cancelled bc the irl dream is too busy being a misogynist on Twitter and handling his allegations in the worst way possible (probably bc if he had to handle them Well he’d have to talk about all the times he was weird to minors on stream including the irl tommyinnit and also a thirteen year old girl bc why the fuck not) so it just Ends implying that it’s good for abuse survivors to kill themselves. it’s real fucking bad.
2 years later tommy and his friends log on the server and just completely retcon that ending bc it’s dumb and sucks and now c!tommy is chilling living his best cottagecore life while his abuser is Presumably dead bc he’s a weirdo necromancer stalker who refuses to admit they’re not Besties, and he’s making up with the people he hurt. it is actually thematically appropriate and not ableist as shit! people celebrate bc CAN YOU BLAME US. CAN YOU FUCKING BLAME US WHEN WE WERE STUCK WITH THAT THIRTEEN REASONS WHY ASS SHIT
anyway c!tommy happy ending real 💚💚💚💚💚🇨🇿 i put the czech flag there by accident but it can stay.
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gffa · 6 months ago
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TALES OF THE EMPIRE wound up being a mixed bag for me, there was a lot I enjoyed but there was a lot that just felt really unfulfilled. Morgan's episodes were very pretty to look at but I couldn't help thinking--the entire time I was watching, even--that Filoni's not great at creating new characters that can carry entire episodes like this, none of this felt particularly necessary or like it was fulfilling a void that I wanted to know more about. It doesn't help that I still think her arc in live action was badly handled, that if she was meant to be a Nightsister from the beginning, her first episode should have dealt with that, instead of springing it on us later, so when filling in the background of her on Dathomir in TOTE, it brings all that up for me again.
Morgan's first episode was so pretty and it was interesting to potentially get more Dathomir lore (even if it's incredibly thin and I felt it was too close to the "we see others suffering in the galaxy, but we don't want to get our own hands dirty by fighting for other people or getting involved in helping others, btw we're morally better for that :)" trope for me personally) but everything on Corvus just felt superfluous to me and I spent time trying to figure out why I felt that way. If they had done her story this way or that way, would I have enjoyed it more? If they had included this or that, would I have thought it more necessary?
And ultimately I just kept coming back to that I don't really care about Morgan Elsbeth enough that I wanted three animated shorts dedicated to her, when I could have had so many other characters get fleshed out better. I appreciated that they were showing two characters on opposite journeys, that Morgan was falling into the dark step by step, while Barriss was slowly clawing her way out of it, but that's about all that I appreciated of Morgan's story (other than the beautiful animation).
But I'm not sure I feel like Morgan's motivations were all that well planned out. It's clear that she's looking for revenge and trying to find a new family at the same time, but it's not really clear why she's working with the Empire or how she thinks this leads her to her goals. Grievous is the one who murdered her village, how does working with the Empire (as the Separatists were folded into the Empire, too) achieve that goal? Who or what is her revenge focused on? Is it that she just wants the whole galaxy to burn, because if her village burned, so should everyone else? I feel like that's probably what they were going for, but that it could have been more coherently written.
Barriss' episodes hit a lot harder, where I'm glad that she at least got an arc, but I feel like it just missed so many marks, like why even have Vader there, I'm all for gratuitous Anakin cameos, he's my trash can man and I'm always excited to see him, but absolutely nothing was done with him, despite that he was looking Barriss right in the face there. Not even a moment of showing the audience, "Oh, his soul is so far into the dark of fear, hate, and rage that he doesn't even care about her anymore." Just nothing there, like there was no connection at all. How do you go to the lengths of putting Vader in a scene with Barriss and then treat it like there's no history between her and Anakin??? So completely unsatisfying!
And then it's another series where other guest appearances would have made sense--Barriss has a whole unfinished story with Ahsoka and you don't include her here? I'm as tired of Filoni putting Ahsoka in everything as anyone else, but here it would have made sense and would have brought that relationship full circle on-screen, Barriss' betrayal of her and her clawing her way back to the light after all the trauma and hurt, there's so much she and Ahsoka would have between them. And then nothing.
Or Barriss' relationship with Luminara, TCW never really got into how that must have felt for Luminara, to have her student betray the Jedi so profoundly, for her to fall to the dark, there's such a well of potential there and it's just entirely ignored. She mentions Luminara once and it was a lovely mention, but there's no sense of resolution or completion to that arc.
I did enjoy her story with Lyn and I try not to compare what the show wanted to do with what I wanted the show to do, but I couldn't help it. During all those scenes, all I could think was that this could have been so much more powerful and complete if it had focus on Barriss' established relationships and characters I already care about, because a new random Inquisitor is just not going to hold the same weight for me as my pre-investment in Ahsoka and Luminara. (On the other hand, with the way they butchered Luminara in the last season of TCW, maybe I dodged a bullet!)
For all that negativity, though, I really loved that Barriss found herself in being a healer again, that she found the light again. That's all I've wanted for my girl!!!! (That and put a headdress on her, ffs.) I legitimately took in a hard breath when she said, "Then you have one more Jedi to deal with." because Barriss is still working through too much to fully come back to clarity re: the Jedi at that point , but when it really came down to it, when she really saw what the dark side really was, part of her still was a Jedi. And the way she spoke of her time as a Jedi, once she had a clearer, lighter head again, was sweet, I was so surprised that we got that much from her, but I'm so glad because, if nothing else, Barriss herself deserves to be in the light again.
The way she was settled into her own skin by the time she confronted Lyn on the icy planet, the way she genuinely wanted to help her, but wouldn't let her hurt innocent children, the way she could sidestep Lyn's predictable moves and could stop the blade with just a hand held out, she found her path and what she wanted to do, and oh it was so lovely to see Barriss finding herself again. I loved so much that her unshakable compassion did reach Lyn, it was such a satisfying arc for Barriss to reach that place after all the people she'd hurt. I loved so much that Barriss getting back to this place does a lot to remind us that her foundation is a compassionate one, even if she was lost to the dark for awhile.
I just wish that there had been acknowledgement of those she hurt, the people that died because of her, the betrayal she stabbed people in the back with, rather than just "sees the dark side is bad, walks away, finds the light again", which goes back to that this feels like a generic story that's mostly impactful because I'm filling in the gaps myself because I already know Barriss as a character, rather than that it continues the story that was previously told about her.
At the end of the day, I enjoyed it and I recognize that I'm being a little unfair in how I'm saying I wanted this, this, and this, rather than digesting what the show itself wanted to do, but when you're crafting two stories that are specifically about showing us the journey of two characters that originate elsewhere, you're drawing on the stories from those other origins--except TOTE decided to only halfway do that. There's a lot to love in these shorts, the animation was incredible, the voice work was incredible, Barriss' emotional journey was incredible and I'm so thankful that they even gave her any kind of compassionate resolution. But the specter of how much the shorts ignored hangs over it too heavily for me to say that they were anywhere near what they could have been imo.
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ssparksflyy · 8 months ago
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Hiii I hope you are having a great day!! I was wondering if you could make another percy jackson x daughter of Hecate reader? If you don’t/ can’t do it that’s fine I just though i would ask.
ask and thou shall receive ༉‧₊˚.
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percy jackson dating hcs ! *ੈ✩‧₊˚
pairing: percy jackson x latina!daughter of hecate!reader warning(s): swearin an: dw i got ur 2nd request that u wanted reader to be latina :)) i just added in some little things that tie in ♡♡ srry if these are short btw </3
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in the dead of night, your eyes so greennnnnnnn
you and percy tend to stay up later than most of camp
your always up and out after curfew
you js function better at night okay
me asf
the day is reserved for lake dates and the night is reserved for sky watching dates ♡♡
youre literally attached by the hip if you couldnt tell
as they say in waitress, i love you means your never ever getting rid of me ♡
you usually watch from the roof of cabin 3, just cuddled up and sharing a blanket
but once percy suggested you watch from the docks
and you were like oh!
not actually but you looked really hesitant
he was like whats wrong??
so you told him about la llorona !! #coquette
it was so preppy
but now youre both scared to go to the lake at night
even though yk shes not real
and youve literally been through tartarus
and back
and you face unimaginable horrors every day
and percy's literally the son of the sea god
mexican folklore is scary ok yall
idc if it didnt scare you as a kid / you like horror
I DONT
IM TRAUMATIZED
MY GRANDMA PUT ON LA LEYENDA DE LA LLORONA WHEN I WAS FIVE AND I HAVENT KNOWN A DAY OF PEACE SINCE
sorry for trauma dumping yall
kinda silly how some story about a lady who drowned her kids is enough to make 2 of camp half blood's strongest soldiers shake in their boots
so u stick to rooftops ♡
you and hazel are bestiessss
shes a honorary member of cabin 20 of course
you exchange tips and tricks, hazel telling you about the things she saw hecate do and the things she said to her
and you tell her about the things youve picked up over the years :))
percy cant help but smile whenever he sees you two together
he sees hazel as a sister
(yall remember in son when he was ready to fight somebody for her or something like that i dont remember exactly what he said but i do know he was ready to fight)
and ur his fav girl ever ♡
his heart just feels warmed
same way he feels when he sees you playing with estelle
you show her a bit of ur powers and she flips outtttt
she asks sally to be a witch for halloween because "i want to be just like (y/n)!!!"
dont know about yall but if i went home and my family found out i was involved with ~brujeria~ i would not be accepted at home (please read as if youre white and cant say shit in spanish)
thats just the mad religious side talking dont worry yall
but sally and paul would literally let you in with open arms
the jackson's apartment is your second home
percy has a drawer reserved for your clothes in his room ♡♡
he loves it when you sleepover, at home or at camp
he absolutely adores kissing your hands
he doesnt care about the dangers you can produce from them, he'll kiss em allllll he wants
you could be cuddled up together, ur reading to him and he just grabs one of your hands and begins to leave a trail of kisses up your arm, shoulder, neck, cheek, and eventually leaving one on your temple
it just gets you like 😵‍💫
he loves his badass girlfriend, okay?
literally your #1 fan
would beat up anybody who talks shit !!!
tea is your holy ground ♡
because you cant drink coffee
cause ya know, adhd, youll just end up knocking out
though you do drink it when you cant fall asleep at night
its me, hi
and hot chocolate is strickly an only-in-december drink, because then it wont hit in december, since you had it earlier in the year
(my mom does that with gorditas and tamales broooo its painful)
so ya drink tea!
i dont drink tea, so im not even gonna try to tell you what his favorite is
he likes whatever you like
but you try a bunch of different teas and stuff together :)
youd probably adopt a black cat together when youre older
youre never gonna beat your neighbor's witch allegations
(probably because theyre true but youll obviously never say that)
i feel like percy would be more of a dog person but lets be real, he likes horses.
fuckin horse girl smh
but that does not mean he wouldnt love and care for the cat
he'd so let you stop to pet any stray cat you see on the street
takes pictures of the cat anytime you do ♡
you cook together !!
you teach percy a bunch of different recipes and stuff :)
has a 'kiss the cook' apron 100%
and what can ya say, you gotta kiss the cook
man you guys manage to stay silly throughout the horrors, we love
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bolszaja-miedwedica · 8 months ago
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before i started my deity work with Aphrodite i prayed to her to make me look like my best self and the day after that my hair started to curl randomly (i have no one in the family with curly hair) and i came out as genderfluid and i still was skeptical
then she gave me so many signs
i literally smelled apple chupa chups when i fell asleep (i didnt have anything apple scented in my room and the window was closed)
i was getting angel numbers constantly
i found a literal shell necklace when i went to throw the trash out
and i was still like "nah cus what if its a misunderstanding"
my soulmate was like "bitch youre so oblivious shes literally calling to you about your cars extended warranty"
and so i asked "if Aphrodite is reaching out to me please show me yourself in my dreams"
AND GUESS WHAT
i dreamed about watching a youtube video called "working with Aphrodite: deity work 101" and there was such a beautiful woman in the video she had a dark skin and long black wavy hair and very thick eyebrows and plump lips and i woke up and i was like "wow she was so pretty" and i was STILL skeptical cus i was like "nah maybe its just because i was thinking about her so much" and my soulmate was FED UP with my dumb bitch shit
and so it was time to do a deity spread because you know maybe its okay and if not then well
and i found a deity spread (i now make my own)
i pulled the card
it was nine of pentacles
i checked the deities associated with the card
"oh, thats random"
another deity spread
the strenght
"oh its the same deity"
ok i think somethings not adding up
and then i researched Bastet
"hmm cats yes, oh dancing,hmmm yeah okay"
and i looked at past me crying randomly because i got the urge to get a cat
and i looked at past me smelling incense randomly
and i looked at past me getting literal signs from her for as long as i could and i was like
"oh my god im so sorry i didnt know"
and so i started my deity work with both of them the same night
past me is stupid, oblivious and made mistakes but past me got me to now where i have a happy established relationship with my goddesses and im forever thankful for that
their altars at first were just sitting on my plant shelf
it was messy
Bastet only had my old silver cat statue, my cat tarot deck (which btw shows her character perfectly) and some tigers eye and tourmaline
Aphrodite only had some rose quartz a drawing of her that i made and a pale pink candle
now we're here and their altars are always full of food offerings to the point i had to upgrade their space to the shelf above
they still share an altar but theyre both okay with it
so uh yeah
just wanted to share this weird story of how i started
(then Aphrodite invited Apollo to my space who helped me a lot with my trauma, then i reached out to Dionysus and Marzanna and now we're here 5 ancient gods sitting in my room watching me read gay fanfiction at night)
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xxnashiraxx · 25 days ago
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With Stars to Fill My Dream (12) - You Know How Much You Broke Me Apart
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LOOK!!! I CAN FINALLY SHARE THIS!!! ❤❤❤ I commissioned this absolutely BEAUTIFUL art from @ritzeldraws of the dance scene in this chapter! It's so beautiful- it captures their expressions and feelings perfectly and it's been my iPad background for months waiting to be unveiled! It's so lovely and I'm beyond happy that I got the opportunity to request this. :") Thank you again!! (They're dancing to Duvet by Boa btw, just in case you thought it was a happy dance)
Prepare your tissues for this chapter 💕 It's sad, and my song choice is awful (sarcasm) but you'll recognize it if you've watched Cyberpunk Edgerunners. No happy endings in Night City 💔
Please enjoy!
Chapter Summary: A brush with death leads to denied realizations from Astarion when Ofelia suffers a fatal wound. After she recovers, the party takes a group photo with Ofelia's revived phone- courtesy of Gale- and they all dance the night away trying to forget about their next objective: taking down the goblin leaders. The unlikely pair's slow dance leads to a drunken confession, and further torment appears in the form of a dream visitor wearing the visage of a former friend from Ofelia's past...
Pairing: Astarion x female!Tav
Warnings: 18+. Mentions of past abuse and trauma. Canon-typical violence and gore.
Word Count: 7,811
Have some dance pics below the link!!! ❤ (peep the accidental cursor lol)
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✧˖Tag List: @khywren
Opening under the cut!
Astarion tries not to think too hard about the way her eyes had been so sweet one moment, and the next had snapped like someone had wrung a child’s neck in front of her. She’d been very successful hiding her tone, but the eyes never lie, and hers were like cold dead stars. Empty and black.
He watches her come out of the broken mill, face impassive, before her brows twitch and a sheepish frown pulls at her lips.
“Lae’zel… I’m really sorry. I should have listened… you know way more about any of these things than me.” 
“No matter. It is normal for warriors to exchange furried words in the heat of battle. Apologies are not necessary, but I will offer mine as well. What were you retrieving?” Ofelia lights up and holds out the little rectangle she’d pried off the goblin.
“My phone! I found it! It plays music!” She grins at Lae’zel earnestly and the gith looks at her a moment before turning away.
“I take it back.” Ofelia sticks her tongue out at Lae’zel’s retreating back before gathering the rest of them close. They disclose the identity of the gnome they’d pulled off the mill, the man walking away towards the treacherous temple ahead- nothing they could do to stop him.
“Okay, we’ve got what? A bugbear behind that building?” She asks, keen eyes darting to the left. Gale nods. “Three trolls in that building there, another four goblins around the back of the old apothecary. Then it’s the road down to the temple. And that sounds like way too many for us to tackle with sunset so close…” She presses a finger to her lips, deep in thought.
“We could break into groups, at least take out the rest here a little at a time?” Karlach asks, her eyes flashing towards the trolls.
“Okay… let’s balance the teams. Karlach, Gale? Trolls?” The two specified nod, though the wizard with less enthusiasm. “The bugbear… Lae’zel and I.” Astarion tuts.
“What about me, darling? I hope you’re not considering pairing me with these two?” He jerks his chin at Wyll and Shadowheart and the latter rolls her eyes at him and graces him with a rude hand gesture. Ofelia flicks her eyes up to him, darkness flaring in them, before she turns her chin away.
“Okay. Come with Lae’zel and me.” He grins, and though they can do without the wet blanket, he’ll trust Ofelia’s judgment. He slides next to her, brows creasing when she stiffens, but she flashes a warm smile at him and his concern ebbs. She’s started behaving like a timid little thing around him and it’s sweet, almost as sweet as her usual red cheeks and tender warmth. What a lovely thing she’ll be to indulge in when she finally lets him devour her whole.
Ofelia lets him pounce on the passed-out bugbear and he preens at the opportunity to show off, lodging his dagger into the neck of the beast as it roars in anguish. He dances out of range of its angry swipes, leaping away gracefully thanks to the meal she’d provided him this morning. Ofelia strums a little tune to embolden Lae’zel and with a final cleave of the githyanki’s greatsword, the creature collapses into a puddle of blood and sour ale. Vile smelling, at that.
“There are lots of supplies lying around, would be good to take them back to camp after we’re done here.” Ofelia murmurs to Lae’zel and the other woman grunts in acknowledgement.
“Ahh yes, moldy cheese wheels and old brandy. Hardly a feast,” He drops said bottle, her eyes meeting his again and he can see that razor-thin edge beneath like a yawning abyss, void and unseeing. He blinks and it’s gone, replaced by dry humor. When she looks away towards an old barn, he frowns. She’s behaving strangely. At least something useful had come from his centuries of torment- the power of observation. And he’s very good at it.
Had it been what he’d said? Perhaps it was a little… cold. Not that it matters, really. But it does now, and he’ll need to remedy it once the opportunity arises. He rolls his eyes inwardly, breathing out a sigh. Why is it so hard to win her affections? She’d even admitted the first time he’d drank from her how much she likes vampires, that should have won him some points, surely? All he needs is for her to agree to a gods damned night with him and he can take the rest from there. It’d be easy to pretend to care at that point. Clinical, even.
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teeny-tiny-revenge · 9 months ago
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It's home cinema manufacturing time! 🏴‍☠️ Gonna put my pirate show on my shelf! (I'm doing an Arts and Crafts Project and I'm making it everyone's problem.)
After seeing how much they cost, I abandoned the idea of getting a Blu-ray writer for now. For the time being, good old DVDs is what it's going to be! My TV is old and not very big, so DVD resolution is gonna be fine.
It's been ages since I last burned a DVD. For the full experience, I'm gonna create nice menus and pretty sleeves for the boxes. Graphic design is my passion! Um.
Well. First needed to find a program to do stuff with. I'm a Linux guy, so I'm using Devede. (Which is free, btw. In case someone else wants to do a low cost spot of putting pirate show on the shelf.)
DVDs fit a maximum of 120 minutes of video. So, four episodes, I thought. But after a quick attempt, the program refused to do more than three (maybe because of the menu also taking up space, and four episodes cutting pretty close to the 120 min mark?). Anyway, three episodes per disc it is. It's a pretty nice runtime for watching the entire disc, IMO. An hour and a half, and then you can return to reality to realise you should probably eat something, or go to bed because it's midnight.
OFMD with its current two seasons has a total of eighteen episodes, which is divisible by three. You get the following setup:
Disc 1: Pilot, A Damned Man, The Gentleman Pirate - That's pretty good, Stede's introduction to piracy all on one disc!
Disc 2: Discomfort in a Married State, The Best Revenge is Dressing Well, The Art of Fuckery - All bangers. Great to watch together, our boys meet and shenanigans happen!
Disc 3: This is Happening, We Gull Way Back, Act of Grace - Many romantic moments, lots of great scenes, shit hits the fan at the end there. Alright!
Disc 4: Wherever you go, there you are, Impossible Birds, Red Flags - ... Pain and angst! What have I done!?! The disc of horrors. Gotta make sure to have tissues at hand when I watch this. But hey, it also has messy bun Ed! Small mercies.
Disc 5: The Innkeeper, Fun and Games, The Curse of the Seafaring Life. - Another disc with all winners. I love all these episodes so much! (You can watch this disc to recover from the trauma of the previous one!) But seriously, this one slaps.
Disc 6: Calypso's Birthday, Man on Fire, Mermen - Great combination again. Season finale! Love and excitement!
... Honestly, except for the psychological damage of putting all the most painful episodes together, this is coming out pretty cool. Says a lot about how good the show is. I actually really love all the episodes (yes even the painful angsty episodes of massive depression). Thinking about this little project really reminded me how much I love this entire show.
So, we got a tracklist, now menus, then we can burn this stuff!
I did the menu backgrounds in GIMP. Realised I have a big folder full of screenshots I took myself, screenshots someone else took and posted on Tumblr, official promo pics for the show, and I have no idea anymore where most of them are from, because I named the files according to what's on them. Which is useful for when you want to find pics (Need a picture of cursed suit Stede? I have files named that, easy peasy!), but not so great if you wanted to give credit to whoever took a given pic you used. (It's probably @sherlockig or @ofmd-ann or @blakbonnet. Please feel credited, your beautiful screens and gifs brighten my day, and some of them are now probably part of my DVD menus. Shrunk down and cropped, but, yeah.)
I originally wanted to structure my menus as having the title of an episode, then some pics from it, then the next episode, then pics from that, and so forth, but I couldn't convince the program to give me the necessary padding between the menu items, so I ended up just putting the episode images below the menu. Still like it.
Anyway, DVD menus can also play sound! Behold a crappy video of my beautiful creation (provided entirely for sound):
It plays Gnossienne N°5!
More crappy pics of my other disc menus:
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Gonna make them some nice sleeves next. Some day. Gotta make sure they all work properly first. So. I'll be on my sofa, watching my DVDs. With menus! (Edit: here are!)
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riskyraiker · 9 months ago
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Hi! Just saw that your request is open, could I request for a HC of TFP characters (and the humans if you're comfortable with it :D) with a cybertronian reader who's a popstar.. like she used to be a very famous popstar in Cybertron before the great war! platonic btw, it's just how they will interact with em (This is just a bonus but: the reader has the same vibes with shining glitter cookie 😭) sorry if this is a bit confusing, thanks!
AHHHH I LOVE THIS!! I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS FOR A WHILE. I did the autobots for this one, but let me know if you want decepticons aswell!
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Being a popstar was awesome! Until now, because of the war. Life was great before. Interviews, shows and interaction with fans filled your schedule everytime, but right now? You ran for your life to the closest escape pod what you could find. Shooting and screaming could be heard behind you, but you ignored it and ran faster. Jumping into the escape pod you activated it and left, but it put you into a stasis coma for safety travel reasons. After eons you wake up on a strange planet, but soon as your hearing recovered you heard shooting. Did you even escape Cybertron and fell asleep? You wondered. Hiding behind the huge pod, you let the fight continue until it stopped. You could hear an feminive voice speak so you peeked from behind the pod. You saw...AUTOBOTS! What a relief for you, but the autobots soon noticed you and held you at gunpoint.
Optimus
Optimus didn't realize it was the one and only popstar from Cybertron at first, until you tell who you were.
He grew comfortable really quick around you aswell :D
Didn't react at all at first, but surprisingly got really happy about seeing you. (His inner Orion pax woke up)
When he was Orion Pax he loved i mean LOVED your style in music and performing.
Would smile the whole time when you explaing happily about your music or about your past life to the team
He also loves your style of your plating and armor as they shine and glimmer in the sun.
Would have a secret soft spot for you and loves to go patrolling with you.
He would NEVER miss a performance from you when the team has any free time.
In short he would be a secret fanboy and who never shows it
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Ratchet
Ratchet was shocked to see you. You! The famous popstar alive after all these years since the war started. He didn't know much about you tho.
He did not like your loud personality at first, but grew to it since Miko is even worse.
Does like the way you perform, surprisingly since you're a popstar for frags sake! But accuses of it being a waste of time.
He would sass back sometimes, since he's so grumpy all the time (grumpy old man!)
Would spare you from his small tantrums!
He rarely sees it, but when he does he absolutely is hypnotized by your shiny plating!
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Bumblebee
Oh he would be overjoyed to see you!
He's such a fanboy he won't even think it through when he's already running to hug his biggest ex-idol (His present idol is Optimus 100%)
Would always listen about your stories from before the war. Or would help you make songs if you ever had time.
The moment you said that you want his beebs and boobs (heh nice) in one of your songs, he almost passed out at that moment.
Would spend as much time as possible with you, because who wouldn't?!
He absolutely would stare at your glimmery plating everytime you were outside
Every time you performed he would be dancing and beeping along with the music.
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Arcee
Didn't grow fond of you until like 2 weeks.
She has heard about you before and during the war.
Somehow she did like your music after you played it around the base.
When she gets to know you the gossiping will NEVER EVER end.
She would also trust you enough to tell you about her traumas and all the loss she has gone through.
You two start to act like sister after a month or few.
She does like to watch you perform sometime, but might think it's a waste of time.
The moment she sees your plating shimmer in the light she would mention it IMMEDIATELY!
Would sing with you if you asked
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Bulkhead and Wheeljack
OH THESE TWO WOULD LOVE YOU!!!
The way your armor/plating shines when it's in natural light, the way you sound and dance, the fact that you used to be popular! Would make them want to befriend you immediately. (Not in a bad way ofc!)
They would be the second biggest fanbots you would have on the team!
Dances for their lives when you sing or perform!
Would listen your music quietly when they're on patrol aswell.
Don't forget! If you need some ideas for songs these 2 would rush over even before you can finish your sentence. (They still make bad ideas xD)
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The humans
DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED!!!
Miko would love you the most from the kids ofc!
"A POPSTAR?! CYBERTRONIAN POPSTARS EXIST?!" Would be the first thing you hear when she gets to know what you used to do in cybertron.
Jack would find you cool (Not as cool as arcee. So he won't hurt her feelings)
Raf would love and examine your shimmering plating after a while he stared at it, but was too scared to ask so you mentioned it to him yourself
In short the kids would be inlove (platonically of course! They're kids!)
June would find you interesting, but never meets you that much so she doesn't get to know that well unlike the kids.
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shesnake · 5 months ago
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I wanted to know your thoughts on this but do you think it's fair to say either Louis or Armand are abusive in their relationship? Idek if this is a valid angle to view the characters from because I guess they're all monsters or whatever but a part of me thinks that it's kinda lukewarm to refuse to engage with the complicated themes of the show, which abuse is featured heavily and pretty clearly imo. This isn't aimed at you btw. Something I noticed is people tend to use some of Louis's less favorable moments to justify the violence he experiences. Like that post about Armand just matching Louis energy in ep 5, most of the notes are taking the stance that Louis is a cold, unempathic pimp who doesn't care about sa victims, that Armand genuinely is completely right when he says he is always cleaning up after Louis that he was only worried and tenderhearted and Louis escalated in the worst way and that after Louis said that he deserved everything that happened after. And I may be biased but to me that is so fucking crazy. To me it seems like fans, specially nonblack fans, have zero empathy for black abuse victims, actively enacting abuse culture even. But idk if that is a too reactive view. I don't want to say Louis isn't flawed because he is. But I mean we are watching the season about Armand getting Claudia killed on purpose and somehow people are still like Maybe Armand didn't do it, maybe it was all Louis, maybe Louis really asked for it. All of it. I think there's a problem there but idk I kinda feel a little crazy too. Btw disclaimer I fuckin hate Lestat this is not about comparing Loumand/Loustat lol
hi! and wow there is so much to discuss here...
I think it is fair to describe the actions of both Louis and Armand towards each other as abusive by definition but it's always important to remember that it is Armand in the position of greater power over him. Armand is older, stronger, owns dominion. He can walk in the sun, manipulate memories, and live without constant debilitating hunger for blood - all of which are things that impede Louis from being his own person outside of Armand.
Louis also faced this same predicament when he was with Lestat, but unlike Armand who uses his own innate powers against Louis, Lestat mostly used his social advantages of whiteness, wealth etc in addition to withholding key knowledge about vampirism to keep himself in control and Louis dependent on him.
and sure Louis can lash out all he wants! He can mock Armand's sexual trauma (trauma which Armand himself already gets them both to fetishise... but that's a whole different conversation...) he can hit back when Lestat hits him but when he's with either of those guys he is always going to be the victim. Nothing shitty he does to his partners, or to Claudia, or to Daniel, justifies what is being done to him by these men.
There absolutely has to be anti-blackness involved in any argument that says Louis deserves any of this. (Of course Armand as a brown South Asian man is not immune from fandom racism but his treatment is racialised in a different way that is also a different conversation). Any negative behaviour from a Black man is going to be seen by racists as exponentially more aggressive than it is, especially the cross-section with those you mentioned who aren't engaging with the complicated themes of this show exploring abuse.
They can see that Louis yelling at Armand is bad, but don't notice that Armand is being manipulative. They can see that Louis stabbing Lestat that one time during sex is bad (and still sexualise it), but don't notice that Louis is disassociating in every sex scene he has with Lestat afterwards (because they're too busy sexualising it). They can see that Louis making Daniel upset is bad, but don't notice that Daniel has been leveling dozens of racist and homophobic micro-aggressions at him since episode 1.
Armand got a few minutes to tell his tragic backstory in Louvre, Lestat had 2 or 3 different scenes in season 1 to recall his own. It's just been words. Meanwhile racists erase Louis' experiences with trauma because they never had enough fucking empathy for him to begin with to even register it happening to him! on screen! in real time! right in front of us!
And yeah Louis and Armand and Loumand are incredibly complex and compelling, and I do enjoy seeing Louis' moments of cruelty towards Armand! But he's never going to win against him in the game Armand built for him.
And in terms of Claudia, I do think that Louis failed her, as he has always failed her. And is responsible for her death in that regard. But that failure involved letting those other two fucking sharks eat her!!! I personally haven't seen anyone pushing the blame completely off Armand and onto Louis but I wouldn't be surprised. This week I've more pissed off about people levelling it all on Armand and think of Lestat as an unwilling participant.... this is of course the blonde white vampire show....
anyways sorry this is so long! thanks for the message this was really interesting to think about.
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lauraneedstochill · 5 months ago
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I debated whether I should keep my opinion on EP3 in the comments to @st-eve-barnes post (she made some good arguments btw!) but I guess I’m out of fucks to give. just like the HOTD scriptwriters ✌
big fat disclaimer: I sincerely can’t say a single bad thing about Ewan. his acting was absolutely amazing, he owned the scene, and it’s pretty clear he doesn’t have a problem with nudity (if you watched “High Life”, you know what I’m talking about; if you didn’t, please read the warnings before watching).
my problem is with everything leading up to the brothel scene with Aegon — because this is NOT how you write conflict, and because it could’ve hit way harder if only it was done PROPERLY. unsurprisingly, it started in EP2:
➡ the fact that we got absolutely no reaction to B&C from Aemond is a joke. I’ve read some people saying “well, Jaehaerys isn’t his son so why would he care” — sure, Aemond wasn’t competing to win the uncle of the year award. BUT you are telling me he wouldn’t simply be pissed about the fact that a couple of nobodies managed to sneak into the supposedly well-guarded castle and kill a Targaryen like it’s no big deal? that they dared to put a knife to Helaena’s neck, that they clearly could’ve done worse things to her? that they left a mess in his room, touched his stuff? you mean Aemond, who is definitely an annoying perfectionist who puts every thing in its specific place, Aemond who’s extremely arrogant about being the best warrior, the biggest defender, the mister-know-it-all, Aemond who clearly has anger issues — HE wouldn’t be fuming on the inside? HE wouldn’t rush to the small council meeting to know all the details? HE wouldn’t volunteer to help Aegon murder the ones responsible? it’s a pity everyone’s forgotten S1 Aemond but I have NOT.
➡ I won’t talk much about the brothel scene in EP2 (@pygmyharmoset analyzed it really well) but I will say that to me it felt very disconnected from the main plotline. yet again, there is NO ! BUILD UP ! was it so hard to at least show Aemond leaving? to let us know what mood he was in (was he agitated? fidgeting? when exactly he decided to leave? did something trigger it?). they could’ve cut out the moment of his arrival so we wouldn’t know where he was going to have the big shocking reveal later when he’s suddenly with Sylvi, all naked and vulnerable. it would’ve only taken an additional MINUTE of screentime!
➡ now, to the worst of it — and I really want you to think over what I’m about to say:
people are allowed to grieve in their own way. not everyone is lucky to have all the right tools to process trauma.
did Aegon treat Aemond poorly? was he mean and cruel to his younger brother? yes. yes, he was (newsflash: there are no good people in this show. hope this helps).
BUT
was Aegon’s child killed because of a mistake Aemond made? is it possible that Aegon’s been harboring his resentment, that the absence of Aemond in that tragic, pivotal moment in their lives hurt him? the answer is also YES. Aegon doesn’t know how and has never seen how to cope with emotions in a healthy way, and it’s not in his power to break the cycle so he keeps repeating all the same mistakes. that’s the tragedy of it and that’s the ticking bomb planted under the foundation of their relationship.
the tragedy of that dumbass writing we’ve been presented with is that we did not see their conflict take root. we DID NOT get to see how their discontent kept growing, how they both felt caged and dissatisfied with their circumstances (Aegon realizes no one wants him on the throne and he feels helpless, Aemond is constantly being denied the chance to prove himself so he also feels helpless) — and how eventually that anger they couldn’t channel into anything else made them lash out at each other.
my first thought after watching EP3 was that there’s gotta be a scene missing between the small council meeting and the brothel scene. there SHOULD’VE been a scene with just Aegon and Aemond, they had all the reasons and opportunities for it! here, think about this:
Aemond’s comment at the end of the meeting comes off as patronizing (“It’s a brave thought” — Aemond is forbidden to leave with Vhagar so he’s glad that Aegon has to sit back, too). Aegon insists that he’s just “as fearsome”; but the thing is, he isn’t sure of it, so of course Aemond’s words stay with him, nibble at him, and it would only take a cup or two for him to get heated about it. he calls Aemond to his chambers and brings back the topic — “You don’t deem me brave, brother? You do not think I’d fight just as hard?”. it’s only the two of them, Aegon is in full armor, standing on his little wooden stool, a cup in his hands. and because he is hurting, he wants to hurt Aemond in return. so he gets off the stool and comes closer to him, sneering, “You are, no doubt, a fierce warrior,” — but then the smile falls off his face, and his voice gets quiet, pained, searing, “So tell me, where were you when my son was being murdered? I came to learn that they were looking for you, were they not? Oh, you would’ve fought them off with ease, for sure. So where were you, huh?”
and then you get the tension breaking, the emotions erupting — and, most importantly, the CONFLICT. Aegon throws the cup away, darts to Aemond, grabs him by his clothes (remember how desperately he held his face in EP9 of S1? the parallel would’ve been so beautiful !), finally screaming “Have you any idea what you’ve done? WHAT IT COST US?” — and now he isn’t talking about B&C but about Luke too. only, we’ve seen the extent of Aemond’s guilt and he isn’t about to show it now, taken aback by Aegon’s outburst, so instead of taking the blame, Aemond does what he knows best — he attacks him in return. they throw accusations at each other: Aemond reminds Aegon he was getting drunk, he himself didn’t do anything to be there for his family, he didn’t even do anything to deserve being on the throne. it’s nasty, it’s a shouting match, Aegon’s buddies eventually have to come in to pull them away from each other.
and it’s no surprise that Aegon goes back to drinking after that. and Aemond, overwhelmed and in disarray, goes back to the only place that can grant him comfort. so when Aegon finds him there and dares to humiliate him publicly and rob him of that illusion of comfort — that’s when something switches in Aemond. that’s when he decides he’s not a loyal dog anymore.
and that is, in my humble and very subjective opinion, how you properly bring someone’s temper to a boiling point. if only Ryan Condal ever cared, HA.
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