#i genuinely had 0 idea i could draw like that

[plebbypebblepleb]

Merry Christmas to my lovely moots!!

and almost happy birthday to me~ fufu, it's the 27th if you havent heard me yapping already! :3

So, to begin this, I want you all to know how much you really mean to me. Everyone here has been a huge part of the reason why i'm still doing art. I've been working on this and hinting at it since the start of the month!

I've been so excited to finish this project, and I hope that this will brighten up your holidays. Keep in mind, EVERYTHING IS PLATONIC!!

also, the order doesn't mean anything. it's just random! (i didnt even finish the drawings in this order, so i have actually 0 idea why it's like this lmao)

AND NO !!! I DONT HAVE FAVORITES. PLEASE DONT BE SAD IF YOUR NOTE IS SHORTER THAN OTHERS!! I JUST INTERACT MORE WITH THEM/HAVE KNOWN THEM LONGER. YOU ALL ARE SOOO IMPORTANT TO ME!! I PROMISE GUYS 😭😭😭

✦ Find your @, and read what I wrote for ya! Then, scroll all the way down for a little surprise ;3 ☆

Without further ado, LETS GET IT STARTED! 🩷🎀

@pr3tty-0n-the-inside,

where do i even begin? through my entire time in the outsiders fandom, you've been there and encouraged me throughout it. you complimented my silly crossovers, and we've overall had the best conversations. you've encouraged me throughout the entire magical girl series, and you're a big reason on why that was finished. thank you SO MUCH for being in my life. thank you for randomly messaging me when we became moots. thank you thank you, thank you. I hope you have wonderful holidays, you deserve it.

Your humor is so amazing, and I always find myself laughing whenever I talk to you. I love your roleplay account and just how you interact with people, and I love your personality.

“my fuckass computer unplugged, kill me” poetry. Words of an angel.

also, be a little nicer to yourself :3

@qqtofu,

i know we haven't talked that much, but i really do admire your art so much! you've been a huge inspiration to me, and just looking at your art gives me inspiration to draw! rin is my favorite vocaloid, and gosh, you really do her justice! i mean, how could you not? you're so super talented! and you're super sweet as well, I hope you have a great christmas/any holiday you celebrate, and i'd love to get to know ya better! <3

@charlie-bonkerz,

we've recently become moots, I know, but you still deserve to be celebrated! you have been so super supportive and I always have a smile on my face while reading your messages!

sometimes, I'll admit, I scroll back to that one compliment you gave when I'm feeling insecure about my art. (ponyboy drawing) I keep rereading it and it's been motivating me to continue doing art. Seriously, I can't stress how much those big compliments mean. I don't receive a lot of support for my art irl and your words really do have a huge impact on me.

thank you so much for being in my life, I wouldn't trade your friendship for anything. Also you're stunning.

@deim0sdread,

DALLAS!!!! thanks so so much for being in my life, you've genuinely encouraged me so much, and I couldn't be happier that I'm your friend! your oc was so fun to draw! thank you for your requests on the magical girl series, getting requests always makes my day so much better, and I get so happy whenever people show that they like my art! especially you, when I first saw how much you liked my art, I almost cried. You're the sweetest, merry Christmas / happy holidays (I'm not sure what you celebrate, but have fun with whatever it is :3) 🩷🎀

@sugarberry-beetle,

kk!! :o your oc was so cute and fun to draw! I'm so glad you randomly popped into my messages! our conversations always make me smile, and the way you type is sooo cutteeee 🩷🎀 thank you for calling my art cool, yours is 18.52% cooler than mine!!! >:333 merry Christmas/happy holidays kk!!!! :D keep creating art, id love to see it! and never give up writing! It's so adorable! DALBIT!!!!

@eepyguy1987,

youve been nothing but kind to me in messages and in my inbox! thank you so much, you make me so happy whenever i see an ask/message for you, and you're definitely a highlight of my days! thanks for being in my life!

@magefelixir,

hey there Felix! I know we don't interact much, but when we do, it's always a blast! your compliments and you expressing how much my art means to you is such a huge push for me to keep creating. If I'm going to be honest, that mesmerizer drawing was created in my head because of you! I'm so thankful for you, mwah 🩷

@cheryyy-valancce,

Cherry, you're genuinely such an amazing person and a kind soul. Your encouraging words and just compliments overall have seriously brightened up my days so much. Our endless reblogs talking about random stuff, and our conversations about vocaloid have been soooo sweet. I love interacting with you in character and out of character, because you're just so amazing to talk with!

Being your friend has been so memorable this year, and I couldn't be more grateful. I love you, cherry! I hope you have wonderful holidays!

@greasergirllll,

we haven't interacted much as of lately, but I do remember when we did, and gosh. That was so fun. You encouraged me so much to really finish off the greasers as magical girls series! Thanks so much, really. Im so grateful for our conversations, and I hope we can talk a bit more soon! 🩷🎀🌟 Happy holidays :3

@nexternalknowsthingz,

HEY THERE NEX!!! youve been such a huge inspo to me.. I don't know if you remember but I commented on a post of yours waaaayyyayay before I even started on any outsiders works.. and you responded and called my art cutee...ababahshaba

ok maybe maybe maybe I was squealing and blushing a bit and maybe I was rereading that comment

BUT!!!! gosh, youve seriously encouraged me so much. Your art is always so fun to see, and I love being moots. Thanks so so much for being my friend, and I hope you have amazing holidays! Hope to get to know you more :3

@boxxy-roxxy,

Rui, your art is sooo pretty. I love the down turned eyes and your colors, seriously, you're insanely talented! I'm so honored to be friends with such an amazing artist, and I still cherish that art trade we did. :3 the way you draw Johnny is so cute, and I LOVE seeing new art from you! I've said this before and I'll say it again. Seeing new art from you is like opening a Christmas present! Never stop, because then I'll miss ya!! (Unless you take a break, even then, I'll support you! You're awesome!!🩷🎀)

@six-eyed-samurai,

When I first saw your tokyo rev stuff, I was like, "woah!! that's cool!" and followed you. Pretty soon after were the long ass asks for the texts and such, and I was so happy when you answered them. I'm gonna be honest, I loved reading your authors notes more than I liked reading the actual texts.

Being able to call you my friend has been such a blessing, from the times you put up with my weird requests, all the way to now. Our headcanons have been so fun to make, and yes. In another universe, we're performing APT. with rindou, ran, inupi, and koko. It's been an amazing year, and I loved every second that was spent with you.

yes. you are a masochist. I don't understand WHY YOU ENJOY GRAPE FLAVORED CANDY?! ITS NOT SANE. ITS NOT AND I WILL STAND BY THE FACT THAT YOU BELONG IN AN ASYLUM. ALSO IM NOT WEIRD FOR DRINKING VINEGAR, ITS LITERALLY GOOD. YOURE CRAZY.

im so happy we can bond over Haikyuu, Tokyo rev, and bsd, and I can't wait to see how your novel develops as you keep writing it! You'll never understand how much you mean to me because I lack to vocabulary to express it. I love you so, so much sunny. I can't wait for my next Christmas with you. 🩷🎀🌟

@redfielddoesthings,

Carmim, jeez. I've been putting off your letter for so long since I just didn't know what to write. you're one of my best best friends, and I enjoy your company so much. Talking with you brightens my day in a matter of seconds. I love the way you type, I love your humor, I love your art, I love your ocs, I love your style, I love you. please never ever change.

You've told me many times that you enjoy how enthusiastic I am, even when I ask if I should calm down around you. I never showed it but you have no clue how much that means to me. I've never really had anyone before this that enjoyed how energetic I was, and to finally know what it's like is a dream come true. Your encouraging words and just overall kindness have been motivating me to continue drawing and doing what I love.

Calling you my friend is such an honor, and I'd never trade it for anything. My life was a boring ass textbook before this, but you took some silly little highlighters in a bunch of colors and scribbled all over the pages. you've lit up my life so much and I can't thank you enough. I love you carmim, /p.

also if you ever say "my art isn't all that" ever again I'm leaking our "insiders" chats. 😋😋😋 I WILL STAND FOR NOTHING BUT COMPLIMENTS FOR YOURSELF

ALRIGHT! the final message before I let you guys go on with your Christmas!

Sometimes I forget how much I'm loved, and how lucky I am to have you all in my life. Being friend with you guys makes me so grateful and helps me realize that people DO enjoy seeing my art. I mentioned this in a few messages, but I do not get much support from the people around me regarding my art. Your compliments mean SO much to me, and I couldn't be happier that I've met all of you.

going back to "forgetting how much I'm loved," I'm sure you guys do too. Keep this as a reminder of how much I care about you and how much you mean to me. You deserve everything and more, and I can't stand to know that a world exists where I don't have all of you. I don't wanna think about the fact that you guys may feel that someone doesn't care about you, because I do. I need you to know that I do care and I will always be here for you. I love you guys so much, and I could never be happier.

AND WITH THAT, WE'RE FINISHED!!!🩷🎀

time taken (for everything combined) : ~22hrs 50m

[d0vegum]

nessie!

redraw from 2019 & and 2021. comparison under the cut :3

2024 (16 years old) - 2021 (13 years old) - 2019 (11 years old)

[sysig]

Caughtcha, gotcha, not letting go ♥ (Patreon)

[starlostt5]

Jeans

pairing: spencer reid x f!reader

summary: you have a breakdown over finding new jeans

a/n: hello! my first fic on this acc I have a marvel acc that I have neglected so I'm starting fresh! This is for the girlies with killer thighs who I assume have had the same problem as me finding the jeans that fit properly!!!!

warnings: probably mistakes English isn't my first language and also I haven't written anything for months so I'm rusty

___________________________________________

"Fuck!"

Spencer pokes his head from the bathroom at your profanity, checking to see if everything is okay.

"Sweetheart, you okay?"

You look at your boyfriend and he can tell something is wrong, not because he's a profiler but because there's tears threatening to spill.

"These are the fourth jeans this month alone."

The jeans you've just now ripped were the last ones you've had, which only could mean one thing. Jean shopping was necessary.

"Baby, that's okay I'll take you to get new ones. It's okay."

Spencer knows he said something wrong when you give him the look - annoyance and frustration in your eyes.

"You just don't get it."

Maybe you sound dramatic, and yeah, you know he wants to help, but that wasn't what you wanted to hear so you dramatically flop on the bed and sigh.

"Okay, tell me what can I do for you?" You groan into your pillow.

"Nothing Spence, let's just go get new jeans."

Spencer texts Emily that there has been an emergency and he won't be able to come to work today, which you tried to stop him from doing because this could wait - apparently not.

"Let's go." Spencer grabs your hand and leads you out.

Spencer severely miscalculated the amount of time it would take you to find jeans - you did tell him this is a process, but he didn't expect that after 3 hours you've gotten 0 jeans.

"I give up. This is hopeless. " You walk out of the fitting room trying so hard not to cry, but this always happens.

"They don't fit properly everywhere. They are either too tight on thighs or they are too wide on my hips or both, or they're too long or short, they have no pockets and if they do they are too small. Oh and get this, when you go to the plus-size store, they get more expensive. Why?I can't even order anything online because the sizes are different everywhere and I-" Spencer pulls you into his chest and caresses your back, drawing circles trying to calm you down.

He never thought about this because he's never had that issue and now it makes sense you've been upset this morning. Now he was even upset at himself for not understanding earlier.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm sorry I didn't understand. Tell you what, let's take a break for ice cream or whatever you want."

Sometimes, you don't believe Spencer is real and even better he's yours.

"Okay sounds good."

While taking a break, Spencer has been thinking about you and how stressful this is for you both physically and mentally.

"What you thinking about so hard, Doc." Spencer chuckles at your pet name for him, you love Back to The Future and Spencer, well he has some issues with how time travel was done, but he likes the pet name anyways.

"I'm thinking how to fix this. Why are jeans so hard to find? That's not fair."

"Spence, you can't just fix the system. This is just how it is. Besides, this wasn't so bad you were there."

Spencer frowns. How many times have you gone on a hunt for jeans without him, if this was "not so bad" how does it look when he's not here.

"Baby, that doesn't help. Is there anything I can do for you?" Spencer asks, holding your hand.

"Uh, you're the fbi call every single company that makes jeans and tell them to make better jeans." you joke, but Spencer gets an idea.

"You know what you're right."

You look at him quizzically, trying to figure out what your genius is going to do.

"Don't worry about it let's go home we're done for today."

*some days later*

Spencer gets the notification that his package is almost home, and he's genuinely excited for you to get this gift. Unfortunately, he won't be there to open it with you, but he's sure you'll love it.

As if on cue his phone rings.

"Hey, Spence, something arrived in your name, I didn't know you ordered anything?" you look at the box in your hands trying to figure out what it is.

"Yeah, I forgot to tell you." you scoff, Spencer is literally unable to forget anything.

"Okay, I lied, that's a surprise for you, but promise not to open it before I'm able to face time you okay?" Spencer can feel your excitement and impatience from miles away, but after some sweet talking, you finally promise not to even take a peek.

"Loverboy, the surprise go well?" Derek asks, ruffling Spencers hair.

"I don't know yet. I am like 90% sure that she'll like my surprise but there's always a chance she doesn't so." Everyone rolls their eyes at his reply and continue talking about the case.

Finally, after getting to the hotel, Spencer showers and calls you, excited to have you see the surprise.

"Hi, honey." Spencer chuckles at seeing you with a box opener in your hand and box inches from you.

"I wasn't gonna open it."

"Sure you weren't. Go on, baby." You huff and open the box carefully, hoping there wasn't anything breakable. You might have shook it a couple of times but he didn't need to know that.

Your eyes open wide in surprise, you look at the box and then at Spencer and then again at the box.

You pull out the pair of jeans from the box and look at them.

"Try them on."

"Spence what is this?" you ask looking through the box counting 6 pairs of jeans with no tag or size on them.

"They're jeans for you! Remember how you said I'm the fbi and I should call everyone and tell them to make better jeans?" the disbelief on your face makes him smile.

"Well I didn't do exactly that. But... I did use some connections in the fbi. Anyways try them on"

Not knowing what else to do, you just do that.

"Spencer."

"These are perfect like they fit like they were made for me."

"It's because they were, and if some of them don't fit, let me know if I need to have a talk with the person to fix them."

You can't believe your boyfriend literally went out of his way and had someone make you a perfect pair of jeans.

"I... I don't know what to say. You're literally the best and no these are perfect. How?"

"Well, I had Garcia research some people and then I found them and then had Derek meet some of them to threaten them to do a good job and yeah."

He says that like it's the most normal thing to say, like he's listing groceries.

"I love you. Not because of the jeans just-"

"I know, I know, but try all of them on. Also, I personally wouldn't mind if you lost the shirt you know because it's gonna overshadow the jeans you know?"

"Spencer!"

[the end]

__________________________________________

hope you enjoyed.

likes comments and reblogs are appreciated <3

[bogkeep]

i remember the shift, when i went from being "some random kid online who likes to draw" to "popular fanartist within a small community". it was on the fan forum for a webcomic nearly a decade ago. i had been posting my art on tumblr for a couple years already, usually getting between 0 and 15 notes on each, with a couple exceptions here and there. as you can probably imagine, being an awkward queer and autistic teen had never made me feel particularly popular before. i wasn't really lonely, personally, though many of my peers are and were, but the idea of many people actively wanting to be my friend and thinking i was genuinely cool - that was incredibly novel.

i have always loved getting attention for my work and find people interested in what i have to say. like, who doesn't? it was a very fulfilling and inspiring experience when it started happening to me on a regular basis, to the point where i could expect it. i went from being constantly apologetic about how annoying i imagined myself to be to others, to feeling confident that at least some people were excited to have me around. absolutely revolutionary to realize that people weren't just pretending to like me, they liked me for realsies, and that putting myself out there and being sincere and genuine in my enthusiasm and interest was actually a positive trait many people valued. wild!!!!!!!!

when you come from a place like that, of course you try to be everyone's friend. that's the scarcity mindset. you have to hold on to every friendship ever offered to you because it's such a rare and precious thing and you don't know when or even if it might happen again. but if you get Popular, well, at some point you learn that you can only nurture so many friendships at once, and that you can't click with everyone. like, it only makes sense. but it sucks!! learning the necessity of rejecting people and letting them down is a harrowing journey, but one that must be made.

there's many deeply lonely people out there, especially online, a space of Connection. connections to other people are so good and necessary and being lonely is an awful thing to be. this means there's a lot of people who can't even imagine not wanting more friends, let alone not be constantly looking for some. it's always a bit of a tragedy when a Very Lonely Person tries to attach themselves to someone Socially Overencumbered, as that's highly unlikely to end satisfyingly for anyone involved.

anyway, i think capital f Fame is like that, but times a hundred thousand. it's deeply fascinating to me how Fame is treated as this deeply aspirational state when it's proven again and again to be a cruel and abusive mistress. like, i understand - don't we all want some attention, some validation, for someone to recognise us on the street with stars in their eyes, like OH you're the COOL PERSON who did the COOL THING and i want nothing more than a HUG and a SELFIE and also i made you this HAND MADE GIFT and PAINTED A PORTRAIT OF YOU... that's the dream, isn't it!! to be recognized for your skill, to be admired, desired! THAT'S WHAT EVERYONE WANTS, ISN'T IT.

but it isn't.

there's a limit to everything. there's a whole spectrum of Getting Attention and Validation between "literally everybody ignores you and everything you do" and "paparazzi follow you everywhere you go" - and i can promise that you can find a lot of fulfilment and joy on the lower end of that scale. it's difficult to explain sometimes, especially to people who get No Attention - it's like telling someone who is starving that the most expensive restaurant in town isn't really worth the hassle, a good affordable sandwich will make you so much happier, trust me. like maybe it's just personal preference and what i can personally tolerate! but i had merely a whiff, a crumb of what they serve at that place, and it's Not That Good. easy for me to say huh!!!!

i'm basically a nobody on the wider web, but i've still had my fair share of unpleasant stranger interactions both of the rude and overly familiar variations. i've been treated as a commodity rather than a person. i've been put on a pedestal and dragged through the mud by the same people. it kinda sucks!! and i don't want to tell people that they should never ever put themselves and their art out there because people might be cruel, because that shouldn't be the expectation! yet for some reason, it is!!!! people experiencing Fame have to deal with all kinds of inhumanely horrible things literally no human person is equipped to experience. many people say that's the price people pay for fame, but that's said by people who haven't experienced even a Fraction of the stochastic terrorism an Audience can do to you if they choose. not all attention is good attention.

i know none of this is a fresh new hot take. i know we all know stalking is unethical and traumatic. but i am still so fascinated by the divide between people who don't understand why anyone would reject any form of adoration and those who have to work very, very hard to keep their boundaries intact.

[skinzchoerim]

OnlyOneOf's dOpamine concert in Warsaw - my experience (+sentimental musings about the lore and its messages)

The first thing I need to get out of the way is that their crowd interaction game is 1000/10. They went on stage already knowing at least two greetings in Polish, and then Kyubin and Nine did a whole pantomime to explain their understanding of them. They presented "elo" as being very casual, best done with a bro chest bump, and they were correct about that. The funniest thing was when Nine showed "siema" (a greeting that's basically just as casual as "elo") as being very polite and official with a bow of the head. And hey, if he thinks that's the most official greeting in Polish, who are we to argue?

The translator wasn't very good so a lot of the context got lost, but they said that while sightseeing they met an elderly lady who was a lyOn. Then they met an elderly man from Busan who they hoped to turn into a lyOn, but he wasn't interested, and Nine said that's just how people from Busan are lol. Junji talked about how much he loved the view and that it made him feel really sentimental, which somehow turned into JunRie doing a couple dance with a spin. I really wish I had a video of it, I also can't find any taken by other people 😔

When the time for seOul drift came they asked about a Polish car brand, and of course everyone yelled "MALUCH!!!", so it was hilarious when they asked us to do a Warsaw drift in a maluch with them.

At some point the audience started chanting "zajebiście" which basically means "fucking awesome", and they were very keen to learn how to pronounce it. I really hope they remember it cause that would be iconic.

Now let's do a time leap and go back to what happened before the concert.

I watched the fanchat from afar and had the best view of Yoojung who looked really invested in everyone he talked to. I was surprised to see how wide and baby-like Rie's face is, it's really cute. Everyone says they look even better in real life, and personally I don't find that to be true. I think they're exactly as beautiful as they appear on screen. I'll explain it in more detail later.

Now for the fansign, which... my god. My worst fear when I saw how little time was reserved for it came true, because it really went by at the speed of light. I'm really glad I brought the prints to give them, because there was no way they would have noticed the shirt. For reference, here is what I gave them (Yoojung got two):

Junji was first, he smiled and said a cheerful "Hi!", I handed him the album and then quickly gave him the print before having to move on to Rie who was already making eye contact. I don't remember his exact reaction to the print, but he seemed positively surprised. Yoojung was the one who had the biggest reaction, his mouth did the '0' he often does and he either gasped or said "wow", it was all genuinely too fast for me to process and file away every detail. I don't remember Nine's reaction well because I was still reeling from Yoojung's (also I was distracted by his scar makeup, cause damn, it looked realistic). I think he said "thank you", although I'm not sure if he even looked down at the print. Mill also seemed positively surprised. Kyubin was last, and thanks to that I got to watch his reaction for the longest, although it was still barely a second. He looked at the print and then made eye contact with me while he was handing me the signed album. There was something about the look on his face that made me wish I had a moment longer to ask what was going through his head, but unfortunately all I could do was smile, give him an awkward nod goodbye and walk off. Did he recognize that he's seen the drawing before? Was he just surprised? Did he like it? I have no idea.

The hi-touch went by even faster since the staff told us to run. The pictures were taken with about 10-13 lyOns each. After the whole thing was done, I knew that for the next concert (fingers crossed 🤞) I'll have to buy the VVIP+ benefits. To be fair to myself, there was already a lot going on in the days leading up to the concert and preparing for the fanchat would've only added unimaginable levels of stress, but I think that the second time around, I'd be able to approach it with more ease. More on that later as well.

While waiting for the concert to start, some of their songs were playing in the background. The volume was fairly low and the amount of noise in the hall made it impossible to hear anything beyond the bassline and percussion, but that just made me wish that they'd release their entire discography with only those two elements cause let me tell you, it sounded SICK.

I started to really regret not getting the VVIP+ benefit once the concert began and the people in front of me covered the view with not just their heads, but also phones and lightsticks. I was only in the third/fourth row, but everyone in front of me was taller so I couldn't see everything that was going on, and seeing the videos others shared on Twitter it does seem like I missed a lot. Still, it was the perfect spot to get sprayed with water which happened more times than I could count (mostly Kyubin's deed, thanks bro I needed it).

The performances were absolutely top tier, but did anyone expect otherwise? I need them to release the dOpamine remix, I'd listen to it way more than the original. I couldn't see Yoojung during begin at all because he performed a little further back, so I'm really glad that once the medley was done they all sang the choruses of the solos again with the audience. Did I cry? No, but very fucking nearly, especially when we all sang begin together. Another moment that nearly brought me to tears was when Nine finished performing beyOnd and the music cut one line into the second verse. Obviously part of the reason why it sounded so heartbreaking was how unexpected the ending was and how much I wanted it to go on for longer, but it also sounded like someone suddenly took away his voice, so it fit the theme of Things I Can't Say LOve perfectly.

Speaking of having his voice taken away, I'm happy to report mine wasn't. The concert experiences I ruined for myself by freezing up and not joining everyone else in having fun outnumber the ones I approached with ease and made great memories during. I was especially worried since the previous concert I've been to, Odd Eye Circle's, unfortunately fell into the former category. The English version of Loonatic was my skinz before skinz existed, and when they performed it, anxiety got the better of me. I couldn't even open my mouth to attempt to sing along, and I still have regrets about it, because I know it would have been a liberating experience.

But none of that happened this time. I sang every song along with them (was I feeling smug that I knew almost all of the lyrics when the people around me only knew the English bits? yes, sue me). I put my whole fucking soul into my favorite songs, especially mirage, seOul drift and skinz. I can't even begin to describe how special it felt. Yelling the lyrics to skinz with lyOns all around me and OnlyOneOf a few meters away felt like a full circle moment. skinz was the beginning of so many things for me, and it's such a therapeutic song that's been helping me express myself unapologetically slowly, bit by bit over the past two and a half years. It doesn't matter that I don't have as many vivid memories of the concert as I wish I had, because I know that those two hours on June 12th 2024 have been euphoric and liberating, and I will carry that feeling with me every day, getting a little taste of it each time I listen to these songs again.

While after the fact I do wish the concert had gone on for longer, at the time it felt like the perfect length. The amount of songs in the encore was a genuinely nice gesture, because they were slowly getting people prepared for the end while constantly whipping out another performance, which is a really smart way to leave the audience in high spirits. I think they ended up performing four songs for the encore - OOO yOu, angel, lOve me and dOpamine (without choreo this time), and then the first verse and chorus of time leap right before they left the stage.

The acoustics in Progresja aren't the best, but it was an amazing experience to hear them sing live. I feel like in a lot of recordings it's kind of hard to tell if they're singing live or if it's playback because the vocal and music layers sort of merge into one. I might share the videos that my mom took with her phone, because hers actually captured that live quality of their singing.

I know me writing this here won't change anything, but I have to put I out there - these kinds of stages weren't made for K-pop acts. I can't imagine anyone aside from the people in the first row or someone very tall was able to see the elements of choreography that took part on the floor or the subtitles on videos (which come on, they at least could have had the foresight to place them on the upper part of the screen, not the bottom). K-pop groups - or anyone who doesn't just stand there holding a mic but has a visual side to their performance - should perform in buildings that are constructed like theaters, with the floor gradually rising so everyone can see the stage comfortably. It seems that the Madrid venue was exactly like that, so if anyone reading this was there or at a different concert in a similar venue I'd love to hear about your experience!

Now something that might cheer up anyone who hasn't seen them perform live - this concert made me very grateful that cameras exist and allow us to watch their performances filmed professionally. It's obvious that they're amazing performers from a distance, but only when a camera gets up close and captures the way they express every song and choreography with their faces does it actually hit. I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, Yoojung is such an impressive and expressive performer, both in his body and face, and having close ups of his facial expressions is a gift from heaven.

As I laid down in bed and my emotions were cooling off, it dawned on me how many good things in my life I owe to them and how special it is to have this one artist I can point to and say "the time I spent with them changed me for the better". I think seeing them live isn't even the pinnacle of my experience as a fan, but everything I carry with me every day that I have thanks to them. That being said, I really want to see them again. Most of what I've written down here was right after the concert, but now I don't feel like I remember as much as I want to. Nonetheless, this was my favorite concert among the ones I've attended and the most special experience of my life so far. Next time I'm getting VVIP+ and getting closer to that stage so I can finally enjoy the view in peace. I'm not even taking the option that they won't return here into account. They will last forever and they will have an infinite number of world tours.

This is where this post stops being a concert review and becomes sentimental musings of an unhinged person, so strap in. I did my best to structure this section in a way that would clearly communicate my thoughts to someone who isn't the owner of my brain and therefore doesn't have the exact mind map of interpretations of the various elements of OnlyOneOf's lore. The things I say here might be something most of us have thought or felt at some point, so what I hope to achieve here is simply it put into words, because I don't think anyone else has done that in the context of OOO.

I have to start by defining what exactly I mean whenever I say “the lore” (please don't make a drinking game out of every time I say "lore" in this post, you will die). Just like with any other K-pop group who has a deeply thought out concept, “the lore” encapsulates everything related to their conceptual work - songs, music videos, lyrics, teasers, MV descriptions, symbolism, references etc. What makes my definition of OOO’s lore deviate from how I'd define other K-pop groups' lore is the elements that make OOO's lore itself different from any other. K-pop storylines are known to be complex, but the ones I’m familiar with can all be described in the form of a story with specific characters played by the members, various events, superpowers and plot twists. OOO’s lore is more focused on emotions - loneliness, desire, love, fear. Because of that, the facts of what happens in the work itself can take second place to the emotional value of it. Their story can't be analyzed like a book with a beginning, middle and end, because it's too ambiguous and multifaceted for that. We can instead discuss the themes and observe the emotional progression happening within the lore. I like to compare analyzing their lore to untangling the chord of your earphones, because when you start getting frustrated at yet another impossible knot, you can just give it a rest, put the earphones in and enjoy how their art makes you feel.

I think it was the youtuber LOU who first viewed something OOO had made through the lens of cubism in her video about dOra maar, but I'd take it a step further and say that OOO's art makes the most sense if you look at everything from a cubist perspective, i.e. there isn't a single perspective on anything, but multiple viewpoints that all work together to create what we could call "the lore". It becomes easier to take a look at the whole picture the lore paints if you keep that in mind.

We observe an internal journey across various songs that connect to each other in smaller or bigger ways. We can, but we don't have to view all of them as being one person's story. The lore contains a collection of themes that create an ambiguous, unnamed protagonist whom we see represented by the bOy wearing cOmme des garçOns or the characters in the be series. None of them are THE protagonist, but they all make up the protagonist, because they all offer different perspectives on the themes that drive OOO's art and have been building up the group's identity over the past five years.

All of what I've mentioned thus far is just creative fiction. There is another perspective on their art that has real life implications, because there are real people whose job it is to express the inner world of the protagonist through songs and performances. OOO's music videos acknowledge their status as idols in the same way other K-pop groups with a fictional narrative do - they break the fourth wall by showing snippets of choreo and lipsyncing in between storytelling. OOO could be written off as nothing more than actors in entirely fictional roles if it wasn't for how intertwined they are with the themes in their art, in no small part thanks to how active they are in the creative process, but even beyond that. Their job as idols is acknowledged within the narrative (skinz MV, beyOnd description, the name of undergrOund idOl). So, their life as idols with a fandom is yet another perspective through which we can view their themes.

Here is where our role as spectators becomes important, because this aspect of the lore couldn't exist without our input. The way we respond to it and the conversation we create around it is what gives it meaning.

One side of the lore is the human side - the intimate and natural imagery of the libidO MV, the cozy warmth of cOy, the fun of blOssOm's choreography. On the other side, there are parts of the lore that feel emotionless and cold - MVs like sage, time leap, asOiaf, dOpamine, or graphics for Off angel and dOra maar. This dichotomy is something that can be used to discuss a lot of themes, like emotional distance in romantic relationships or a feeling of being ostracized by society. For the benefit of this post, I'll focus only on parasocial relationships between artists and fans.

Being a fan is both an experience of intense connection and distance that goes way beyond just oceans and borders. The one-sided nature of a parasocial relationship can be difficult to navigate for some people, but it seems to be something a lot of us need. It's comforting to know that you can develop a strong emotional bond with someone you're completely detached from and don't have to do any of the work a real interpersonal relationship needs; you just get to enjoy yourself as you receive art and entertainment. But that comfortable distance distorts the way we perceive the artist's personhood. We know and understand that they're a fellow human being, but we can't help that we never have an opportunity to experience them as such. They’re not people to us in the sense that they have no physical presence in our lives, they're just a series of recorded images projected onto a screen, filtered and airbrushed. We can watch them act like regular people on and off the stage, but whether we want to or not, we perceive them as more glamorous than anyone we meet on a daily basis. How could we not when part of their job is to tower over us while looking like a perfectly crafted illustration every time they get on stage?

This is where another theme present in OnlyOneOf’s art comes in, which is putting someone on a pedestal. In their songs, it's discussed in the context of romantic, artist/muse or God/follower relationships, but the part of the lore I'm talking about here is something that exists in the way we as spectators perceive them and their work.

Idols are human - I'm aware I'm not making an interesting point by acknowledging that. The reason I've been inspired to write about this in the first place is that I realized how being in physical proximity to someone you have a parasocial relationship with can shift your perception of their humanity.

I didn't buy the VVIP+ benefit because I knew I would be way too nervous about those six minutes and I'd probably spend most of that time awkwardly pretending I can hear what they're saying through the noise all around. Never meet your heroes, because you might make an idiot out of yourself, or however the saying goes. I thought I was in the vast minority who felt this way due to my anxiety while other lyOns would be ecstatic to get to meet them face to face. However, while I was standing in the queue I overheard a lot of people talking about how nervous they were, which is funny, because why the hell would any of us be nervous? They're the ones who are about to have a crowd of strangers observing their every move and recording every little mistake, they should be feeling the most nervous of us all! This got me thinking about why anyone would be nervous to meet their favorite artist, and the conclusion I came to is that it's intimidation. We're not wrong to feel intimidated; I think it's perfectly normal and natural in this scenario. I'd say it’s also quite healthy, because you’re not able to get too familiar with someone who intimidates you, which ensures the emotional distance required within a parasocial relationship is kept. As with everything, it's about balance. The problem appears when the emotional distance between a regular audience member and an idol grows so large that it becomes dehumanizing. Unfortunately, seeing how Korean netizens and international fans alike latch onto tiny things to criticize about what idols do and say, this is still a very relevant topic. A pedestal that's too high can result in an approach that's entitled, cold, and often cruel. An idol becomes an imitation of a person, someone untouchable and unshakeable. Any words thrown their way, especially online, feel insignificant in comparison to their towering presence. For the people with an especially cruel streak, finding out their actions have a psychological impact on a public figure probably makes them feel like they regained some power in this uneven relationship. To them, it's nearly impossible to perceive an idol as someone with a right to receive empathy, because in their mind, the idol is too far removed from the humanity they observe in people who exist around them.

What's important here is that the lore shows us the full spectrum of who OOO are - they're idols, singers, performers, actors; they're people with fears, desires, intimate stories and hidden sides; people who have dopamine running through their bodies, people who need connection with others and people who have things they can't say. These things can't be separated from the members, because they make sure to take this message beyond the art itself. They don't filter themselves nearly as much as most idols have to - they swear, make dirty jokes, write songs about sex, casually talk about kissing men and offhandedly mention having a romantic life without apologizing for it. They're underground idols, and they intentionally distance themselves from the unforgiving audience members who would have a heart attack if their faves acted one tenth as relaxed as OOO do on a daily basis.

What I'm trying to get at here is that OnlyOneOf's art is created with the intention to create more empathy - for queer people, for mistreated lovers, for discarded muses, for people reconciling their faith with their sexuality, for one's own self despite having a lot of internalized issues. Through doing that, they override the loneliness inherent to the stories their songs tell and create possibilities for connection. They give us art that makes us feel less lonely by being a reflection of our messiest, most intimate feelings and experiences, and in turn they ask us to recognize them as a reflection of us and to not isolate them from the full human experience just because of the job they chose and its restrictions. When Jaden Jeong said they're the future of boy groups, I think he hoped they could influence audiences to humanize the figure of the idol.

I watched them between the professionally executed performances as they riffed off of each other, laughed and zoned out while looking at the audience. There were no cuts to a different, more flattering angle, no hand in the editing room controlling what footage sees the light of day. They look more beautiful in real life not because anything about their features looks different, but because the reality of being in the same space with them and finally getting to experience them just as any other human being, even with some distance still present, is a very special experience that holds beauty of its own. At that moment, I couldn’t remember why I was nervous before, and I began to wish I had sat down with them and shared a short conversation about any random thing. It would have been imperfect, but there was no reason to be afraid of that. They're just six guys of flesh and blood who clearly love what they do and whose work has given me happiness and purpose over the past two and a half years, and I would have cherished those six minutes of interaction.

On the train home, I discovered a more sentimental feeling while listening to them, especially the songs they performed, but not exclusively. There was something more personal and artistic I heard in their voices that made each song feel like more than just a recording, but a special moment in time shared by people who created something they wanted to share with others. This feeling fades the more the time distance grows between the current me and the me that attended the concert. Two hours weren’t enough.

I don't know how to end this post other than to say how fascinating it is that including imagery of fan/idol culture and technology within the lore so it mixes with all these deeply intimate stories makes everything OOO do a living piece of art. Simply existing as idols and people fuels the reason for the existence of their concept in the way that it currently exists, and I just think it's incredible.

[pine-needle-shuffle]

gosh sorry i started typing this and nearly forgot a tw for body image, self concept that kind of stuff and PLS!! delete if this is not great haha but like

i am not so great with my words when it comes to stuff like this and might not sound great even if i had all the time in the world to get it together but like.... a thing i really love about your art is how much you make everyone look like just some guy even when we're in the fantasy game where everyone is ripped and tight and conventionally pretty. i like that you take all the time it takes to create a piece where this guy is fatter than he is on model, or these facial features on model are exaggerated into things we see IRL all the time (you give cloud such a distinct nose with the hard lines and the downward slope and it's SSSSOOOO GOOD!!!!!!!!) like there's a love i have for on model drawings and the games themselves ofc bc they're the source material for my escapism but like. this is the part where the words fail me but that you (person with a life and many things going on just by nature of being someone) sit down and draw (thing that takes SO MUCH ENERGY) wedge with so much clear adoration and love and then i see everyone in your circles go nuts with just as much love and adoration that it genuinely is helping me more with my own body issues than years of therapy have lmao. maybe the therapy greased the wheels but still. you draw cloud with acne and a "strong" nose and he's still perfect. you take Zack with the "perfect twunk build" and then you give him a time skip of comfortable and safe living and he's a bear and he's fat and hairier and happy and he's still perfect. he's still my favorite guy even when he's not The Most Conventionally Attractive. you draw fat characters and not just skin and bones and muscle characters in these flowing poses that i used to only see for models where you can see their muscles so easily through their skin. i've been working for a very long time to try and overcome my desperate obsessive ruminating on "i need to be waifish and as small as possible" after running the wrong circles years ago. you're giving us art of our favorite guys and also helping at least me with the idea of not needing to be skinny and pale and hairless to be wanted or loved, sorry if this sounds really dramatic and weird but it does very much feel like you've unlocked something in me that makes my life just a little easier so thank you so much for that :0)

anon i am grabbing you by the shoulders this means so much to me you need to know that. and no need to apologize, you articulated your thoughts very well, much better than i think I could have

im- oh god idk where to start, i am unbelievably happy that my art is capable of helping people, its always on my mind when i create but to actually know that people think about it and that it makes them feel better is astounding to me. i want to make people feel seen, to feel loved and appreciated, to be that space for others cause i know what its like not having it. my goal really is to draw people, and people deserve to see themselves in art.

while i feel very small in my online space, to have an impact on others is the greatest achievement i could ever make, and i am so incredibly glad to have helped you in any way. your words mean a lot, thank you so very much for sharing them with me

[tiddiesoutwhenthetisout]

recent doodles (in between losing our shit in overcooked so we don't actually lose it)

random bulshit incoming

Pyrhhus

context: we have what we call our own "fanon pyrrhus" based on the idea that he is "an achilles without a patroclus". we play this super random game where we make a story, leave blanks for characters, then randomize. the storyteller improvises depending on these, and what happened was... the demon lord hector was being attacked by pyrrhus, took one look and said "yk what, i'll adopt you. i'm done being a demon lord (because the party sucked so hard he didn't think it was worth it). let's go back to my wife and kid."

and for the first time pyrrhus felt genuine love and care and went from the snarling boy (bottom right) to the cutie on the left. and in our succeeding games he has dissociative identity disorder as a running gag. he turns feral when he feels threatened (words said, things seen, etc.) but generally he's a really sweet guy especially when he has granny (thetis), but a father figure whether isolated or not is essential lest he's just feral.

in one story, his father threw him into the dungeon (yes it's achilles) because he didn't want the child. so little pyrrhus had to eat monsters to survive. his grandfather peleus turns out to be the leader of an orc gang hanging out in there so at least he has a sweet side, but they don't live together because pyrrhus is rebellious and defensive with his autonomy and capability. also, this one plot definitely wasn't a crack rework of dungeon meshi lol-

then here's ANOTHER redesign of

Patroclus

because i can't get him right orz. the "looks like heracles" thing was because he resembled my image of heracles before i tried to salvage his hair. i couldn't erase anything bc we did not have an eraser lmao. i think this will finally work, but i just have to tuck that stray lock of hair away from his face next time. also, i'll attempt facial hair again but in smaller amounts (i put stubble on him in the next pic). i'm just incapable of drawing more "masculine" features rn but i'll practice at some point... 💀

that's achilles below patroclus. the dark left eye was an accident, but honestly it *would* be interesting if he had one pitch black iris from his mother and the other green is from wherever the fuck he got it. i took the headband thing from his hades design too hahaha (idk my ancient greek culture okay)

also, yes, they do have matching ear piercings. i might try to digitalize these again later on when i'm in the mood.

i have to learn how to cartoonize stubble oops

also, curly/wavy hair is so fun to draw with these simple shapes, huh : 0 i'm the type of person to draw hair with fine strands except when i'm deliberately aiming for that anime style (i just want to learn how to color like them help).

i was going to yap about the stories we've done so far but i realized maybe i should turn that into an entire new post. or maybe draw stuff for them 🤣

also, like DnD this game would probably be fun with a lot of people. you could do this for any fandom too so that's the best part of it.

[acilykos]

Hi. I see you're aroace and I'm too so I was wondering if I could ask you a question? Idk if this is something you do I found you through aroace senkuu post so absolutely feel free to ignore if you don't want to talk about it.

So basically I'm trying to figure out what exactly loveless means. BC a lot of people both arospec and not have told me that label might fit (as in I want 0 romance etc. But also no platonic equivalent). However. I am a very passionate person about my chosen career, music, art, my cat. Those are all things I feel so strongly about, I wouldn't know what to call it but "love". Similarly there are people I care about, just not in a way where I want romance with them or a platonic version of that kind of relationship.

(I've seen you call senkuu loveless too, and I'm a little confused BC he clearly does care deeply about some people and possibly even more so science. Why not call that love? Is it a terminology thing?)

I'm not trying to pick a fight, I really like your analysis of senkuu.

I'm genuinely trying to understand.

It's possible to reject the societal notion of what love is. I do so myself.

But there's no denying that the chemicals involved are something everyone experiences. Like. Everyone gets dopamine, vasopressin, oxytocin etc. It's just the context that's different. Much like oxytocin is experienced both in mother-infant bonding and in sexual contact, I get a dopamine rush listening to music but not making out with someone.

(granted romantic love hasn't been that well examined but there does seem to be a consensus on the general chemistry involved)

Same chemicals but different result/feeling, you know?

Not getting these chemicals at all is impossible I think, so that can't be what loveless means.

So what does it mean??? Is it just about society's perception of love??

I personally approached my lack of romantic attraction by Googling the brain chemistry BC clearly I wasn't getting anywhere with the emotional side. I'm not an expert. But the definitions of different aro orientations I see commonly, don't actually address this at all. It's like everyone decided on a different definition of "love" and nobody told me any of them.

Again, I know this sounds very passionate, but I always sound like that. I'm not trying to pick a fight, nor am I expecting you to solve my identity crisis. So really no need to reply if you don't want to. I can see how this would be. A lot to try and answer.

Hi, hi!!

First of all, I'm happy to meet a fellow AroAce!! I'm also calling myself loveless because it fits the most, I did research before and found it was the closest to describe myself.

Second of all, I think it depends on the definition of what loveless means for oneself because as always, sexuality at the end of the day is a fluid and personal thing.

Apologies if some of the thoughts seem jumbled or contradicting. I just woke up, was very happy about getting to ramble and I just don't know how to properly describe my "emotional thought processes" because I decided to illustrate my points with examples.

It's a long read too, I hope you don't mind.

Personally, I define it as a "lack of attraction" because oriented and angled AroAces experience other types of attraction (like platonic, aesthetic, etc.), but don't ask me to explain the difference between either, I really have no idea what it is (no offense to any angled or oriented AroAces). Personally, I find it ironic that the two most known "orientations" of AroAce people are still based on experiencing attraction despite AroAces being known for not experiencing it. So we had to create another word to say "Yeah, we actually don't experience any type of attraction”. It's also ironic to me that we call it "loveless" because it's not that we don't love, we just aren't attracted to people.

I'm an artist, I love art and drawing myself, as well as writing.

I'm also a scientist, I love chemistry, astronomy, pharmacology, psychology, really, I'm just always happy to talk about any subject. In fact, that's my current career, I'm a pharmaceutical technician.

I have favourite songs, favourite subjects, favourite seasons. Favourite shows, favourite characters, hell, I also have favourite ships.

I care about my family and friends too.

It's just that I'm not attracted to people. I don't want a romantic relationship because I don't experience romantic attraction. Same as I don't want a sexual one. I just don't see the need or appeal for another person if the goal is to just have a dinner date or a climax. Sure romance and sex can come hand in hand, but that depends on whether or not you experience either or if you're committed in a relationship. Anyways, I digress.

These two are the typical ones people talk about when it comes to attraction, but then there are the illusive platonic and aesthetic attractions, and many more I believe. One of them is explained later which causes AroAces in the first place to also use the labels oriented and angled.

Platonic attraction, or at least as I come to understand it, is seeing a person and just wanting to be their friend. You see someone and you think "wow, I really want to be their friend!!" also apparently called having a "squish".

I don't do that. I don't really feel something compelling me to talk to this person to become their friend.

Same as I don't feel attraction towards aesthetically pleasing people (which is also a highly individual definition). Or well, for a lack of a better term, the only "Wow, I really like how they look" I experience is in terms of gender envy. I don't want to be with them, I don't want to be them either. I just think "I'd like to express my gender like that". If that makes any sense.

I see people talk about "they're hot" and "they're so cute looking" and how they have this attraction towards them because of the way they look, but I just don't? I may appreciate the beauty by acknowledging that someone has nice features or a cool style, but it's the same as me looking at the weather and going "Ah, the sun is shining, isn't that nice." before continuing to do whatever I did, not spending more time on thinking about the weather.

For a real life example: My sister and I are going to a driving school. She has an aesthetic (and I call it on purpose an aesthetic attraction. She has not spoken once with the guy and she also said it's not exactly a crush) on one of the other people there, which to me makes no sense given his general character he revealed at least at the driving school. She even took his pen he forgot at school (just some company gifted pen from when we got a visit that day) in hopes of giving it back to him and struck up a conversation (She failed to. She was too embarrassed, in case you're curious).

I only acknowledge he has a nice jawline. That's it.

I don't feel any type of attraction towards people. I don't want or need to be their romantic partner. I don't want or need a sexual relationship. Just because someone has a personality that clicks with mine, I don't automatically feel the need to become their friend. If we become friends, great. If we don't it is what it is.

Obviously when I'm friends with someone, I care about them, but it's just... not the way friendships are usually portrayed. I don't feel the need to have many friends, or meet up with them constantly or go on trips or anything of the like. I like them a lot, I want them to be well. I just... don't really feel an attraction? I don't know how to properly explain it.

An attraction for me is either the need to be constantly with them, one way or another, because you physically and/or mentally/psychologically feel the need to be in their presence, whenever an opportunity arises OR that you spent a lot of time just thinking about them (daydreaming, fantasies, you get it). I just don't feel like that. I'm fine with not talking or seeing friends for multiple months or years. I'm also fine if we don't talk constantly too. If the friendship ended because we couldn't maintain it, it wouldn't destroy me.

It actually happened multiple times, I'm fine with it. Do I miss them or feel nostalgic when I think about past experiences with them? Of course, I care about them as people.

But I'd feel the same about it even if we had stayed friends, because I obviously feel nostalgic with things I did with my current friends.

I just really don't have the ""need"" to have friends in my life. I'm not "attracted" towards them, I care about them and I like them, but it's just not the type of attraction or even love that society usually attributes to what (best) friends are supposed to be or behave like.

(Same for my family. I haven't seen some of them in years, I don't need to. I like them, I care about their wellbeing.)

You may be wondering, if that's my attitude towards friendships, how do I even have friendships.

They talked to me one day and we happened to keep talking because we liked what each other had to say. It's been years later, so it's safe to say that we still like each other, but not once have I ever initiated a friendship, funnily enough. All I did was just... reply or talk once and we kept talking and meeting up, and eventually we became friends, and because they know a lot about me and I about them, I care about them.

And this is what I think Senkū is like too.

He cares about his friends deeply and he obviously cares about his family too. But he doesn't feel any attraction to people. He never once had an "I need to be their friend" moment. He accidentally sort of becomes friends with them because of the situation they're in and then develops a friendship with them because they've been through a lot of things for multiple years.

How did he meet Taiju? Because Taiju saved his machinery. Senkū didn't have any friends prior to that. But then they talked and spent their childhood together and became friends.

Taiju introduced him to Yuzuriha, they talked, she helped with his experiments as well, and they too became friends.

Senkū not once initiated a friendship.

He may have approached some of them first, but not because he wanted to be their friend/felt platonic attraction, he just needed them for a plan, then he used them for his plans, but they stuck around and they talked and time passed.

If it comes to his plans or science, he talks first. If it comes to any "emotional" conversational topic, someone else initiates it.

Senkū just doesn't feel the need to have emotional connections, but that doesn't mean that he doesn't care about his friends or won't develop friendships, if that makes sense. He doesn't seek them, but if friendships happen to develop, he accepts it. He doesn't portray it outwardly, but deep within his heart he still cares.

Everyone in his life started out as an ally, it eventually became friendship. Senkū didn't recruit people because he wanted friends, he recruited them because he had a need for allies to wage war against Tsukasa, then Ibara, then Whyman.

You can even apply it to Senkū's relationship with Xeno, who is according to the fanbook one of Senkū's "closest relationships" (the other one being Byakuya). Senkū respects Xeno as a scientist and as the only NASA employee who actually helped him build a rocket, but even then it's because Xeno talked first and their relationship was strictly mentor and mentee, it was hardly a friendship in what society defines it as anyway. I guess the closest equivalent would be Marty McFly and Doc Brown from Back to the Future (I know, Marty isn't Doc's mentee, but it's about the assisting in science projects part), if it comes to media, but even then Senkū's and Xeno's mentorship would not fit the definition of friendship the way Marty's and Doc's does.

I also call Senkū loveless, because he would never enter a queer platonic relationship (qpr). Entering one would mean you experience a type of connection that is more than friendship, but not romantic or sexual. Or at least that's how I came to understand it. Personally, I'm still confused on what they're actually like aside from them developing from a "tertiary form of attraction". This is where angled and oriented AroAces come in, and why some people call themselves "AroAce lesbians" for example. They experience a different type of attraction towards women that's not just friendship, but it's also not romantic or sexual (at least that's how I understand it, any tertiary attraction feeling AroAces correct or explain it to me, because it's been confusing me for years).

Now look at Senkū and tell me that he'd ever enter such a relationship, when he barely feels the need to make friends on his own. He says it himself "love causes only problems" because of the emotions involved in it. He also, as we established, doesn't feel the need to make friends. If that's already too much and Senkū doesn't have the need for friends, and a QPR is similar, except it lacks the romantic and sexual part and is supposedly "more than a mere friendship", then Senkū definitely wouldn't have that.

I think it's important to mention that, but I think at this point it is obvious, I don't define attraction and caring as the same things.

Why would I? It isn't the same thing, otherwise we wouldn't have different words for it.

Attraction means I myself feel the need to be close to whatever attracts me, maybe that I can't stop thinking about it because I need it in my life, but it can also be superficial.

Care is that it doesn't cross my mind every day, but maybe I happen to think about it once because it crossed my mind, or if I'm with friends or family who tell me about something that happened to them, I care about their wellbeing.

You may also have noticed that I barely even used the word "love" despite talking about being "loveless". As I mentioned in the beginning, I really don't think it's the right term. We love. We care. But it's just not the love people think of first (aka romantic). I love my hobbies, I love my friends and family, I love my favourite characters. But none of this is what society tells me that love is supposed to be or feel like. But it's the most direct way of saying "I don't experience any type of attraction", as misleading as it is, sadly.

And that's it, basically.

Again, it's just my own definition and experience, so how true it is for the majority of AroAces or how much you agree with me, is totally up to you and anyone else. Emotional matters are confusing, and a lot of the time don't make sense and are hard to put into words, but I gave it my best shot with all I know right now. If you're curious or think that loveless may not be the right term after all, you're welcome to do more research on the terms angled and oriented, I bet there are a lot of AroAces who identify with those labels ready to help you out, and who know much more about it than me.

I hope I was able to help you in any way to find some clarity! Thanks again for stopping by, feel free to do that again any time!!

[corvidcall]

my top 5 favorite commanders of 2024

I know a top 10 is more traditional, but... I mean, I didn't want to pick any commanders I didn't actually build!!

Before getting into the list, I do want to give an honorable mention to Bonny Pall, Clearcutter, which is a deck I built but never got the chance to really play. But as a Minnesotan, I gotta show some love to my girl Paul Bunyan.

Now, onto the actual list!

5. Kellan, the Kid

The difficult thing about this list is that, as a Vorthos, I really just wanna put down all my favorite characters. And I LOVE Kellan. My sweet boy. People love to tell me that "Thunder Junction had no story," and I genuinely still don't understand what they mean by that, because I read the story!! It very much existed and was good! Kellan tries to sacrifice his own morals to win his deadbeat dad's affection, and it just doesn't work, because his dad is fundamentally incapable of caring about him.

Anyway, uh, the card is cool too I guess. Kellan looks very handsome in it and I'm so proud of him.

4. Yuma, Proud Protector

Would.

...I was just gonna leave it there because its funny, but unfortunately I have "can't shut up" disease. Yuma is the first trans man in MtG! (At least, the first canonical one. We all know Jace is trans but he's stealth and used his mind magic to erase the knowledge from WotC's memories). The sidestory about him was one of my favorite bits of mtg writing this year. Also, he's from fantasy Chicago and moved to Thunder Junction, and as a trans person who moved from the midwest to a desert, I find him very #relatable.

...ok technically I live in a semi-arid region and not a true desert. BUT STILL.

Also, this deck is fun because everyone always gets concerned that I might run mass land destruction in it. And if the guys at my LGS keep pissing me off, one of these days, I will.

3. Flubs the Fool

Its kind of funny that this is on the list, because, by all accounts, it should not be a deck I enjoy. It doesn't have either of my favorite colors (white and black). It's from a set I hated (i did NAWT enjoy Bloomburrow lol). Its a cEDH deck (I think cEDH is an abomination). Its a storm/combo deck (I dont like having to keep track of that much, AND i don't like taking that long of a turn).

... but tbh its a hoot! So far, it's had a 100% win rate against the cEDH players at my LGS, and it just makes me laugh. You want to be Hellbent (have no cards in hand) as soon as possible, which is usually the OPPOSITE of what you want, and you just draw a card, cast it no matter what it is, draw another card, until you manage to draw into your wincons (infinite storm combo + Brain Freeze to make everyone mill, or infinite mana combo + Walking Ballista to ping everyone for infinite damage). It runs exactly 0 interaction. What other opponents' decks are doing is not your problem. What YOUR deck is doing is not your problem. We're on empty brain mode babey!!!!

2. Alquist Proft, Master Sleuth

Must a commander be powerful in order to be on the list? Must a card be "good"? Is it not enough to see a beautiful face, small?

I had two goals with this deck: First, I wanted a lower-power deck that I could play with my sister, who is just learning how to play, and second, I had such a blast playing Azorius Detectives at the MKM pre-release that I wanted to build a deck that had all the fun cards from that.

Alquist is certainly not... the best commander ever. His activated ability is REALLY overcosted, considering how low impact it is. By my math, it's not even worth using unless you're able to make x=3 (for anything less, you'd be better off just using your clue tokens normally). But he helms a deck thats honestly one of the most fun in my collection! There's a lot of fun cards in there, like the one that makes detectives unblockable, or turns all your clue tokens into equipment, or gives your clues Exalted, and it's really fun to sit down at a table with this guy and see people have no idea what the hell kinda deck its gonna be. My partner plays this deck more than I do, but I cant stop thinking about the time I was sitting at the pod next to them, and I overheard one of their opponents go "Azorius aggro???????" like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. And he was right!!

1. Shilgengar, Sire of Famine

I built this because the art of a demon sitting on a throne of angel wings was the sickest thing I'd ever seen in my life. And it still is.

This is my #1 because this deck is just so... me, back on my bullshit to be honest. Orzhov is far and away my favorite color pair, but thus far most of the typal decks you see in Orzhov are vampires, and tbh I... don't really like vampires. I like vampire-type EFFECTS (draining enemies while healing yourself is the ideal tbh!!) but as a creature type? snore. Sick of seeing vampires in everything, sick of hearing about vampires, and I don't think vampires are sexy because vampires are one of the most culturally thin movie monsters, second only, perhaps, to the Slender Man himself. show me a fat vampire and we'll talk.

Anyway, this is an angels deck, which is way way cooler because I love angels. Big huge lady with a sword who can FLY??? HELLO???? very sick. And its all about sacrificing my own angels to make Blood tokens, and then sacrificing the Blood tokens to get all my angels back from the graveyard. I love an Aristocrats strategy (a deck built around sacrificing your own creatures) because I think its really funny. I show up to a wizard battle with my army of cool angels. I shoot them all myself before you get the chance to. When the dust clears, I have won somehow.

Its funny that, considering that I mostly build decks based on characters I like first and for gameplay reasons second, my most favorite deck of the year is of a character I couldn't care less about lol. Sorry man, I don't care that you invented vampires in Innistrad! I'm busy admiring all the big beautiful sword ladies I put in here. And then pinging everyone to death with Mirkwood Bats. And that's gonna take up pretty much all of my time!!

Overall, I'd say it was a pretty good year for Magic for me!!! I had a lot of fun building these, and I actually started going to my LGS weekly to play. It's been a blast! Can't wait to report back next year to talk about all the fun I've had in 2025!!!!!

[cursecrazy-writing]

It's not like this blog has attracted virtually any attention so I don't know what good it is posting here, but I feel a little guilty saying nothing at all when the least I could do is leave a sort-of farewell note explaining why I'm not around.

Uh basically I'm very done with writing. I owe thousands of words to various commissioners, and I still intend to get that work done, but beyond that, I'm not going to waste any more of my time writing stories. The whole endeavor has plainly not been worth it, all the stress of a second job but with a fraction of the pay, so I'm just going to stop.

And really, it hasn't been about the money. I've always undersold myself because I know the true value of writing as a job is worth extremely little, and that most of writing is based on passion. What I've strived for previously was not to make a lot of money or a living off of writing, but to simply put stories out and have them be read. What I desired most was feedback -- not necessarily criticism, but literal feedback, any signal or indication that people are reading my stories, that these stories affect people and that they're happier having read them. But for years none of my stories have been getting noticed, certainly not enough attention to merit months of work or even the amount of effort it takes to upload and advertise a story on social media. You can see how a vast majority of my uploads here on this Tumblr have 0 notes. On Twitter, I was lucky to get two or three likes from some of my regular followers that habitually liked anything I posted. I go to my Patreon stats and see mere double digits of anyone even clicking the damn links. So this main goal of mine, to simply have my stories be enjoyed, is utterly failing.

The reality is that I am not a good writer. If I was a better writer, I'd see more success -- my momentum from Endless would have continued for a little more than just a couple months of attention. Even Endless itself was a strike of luck, because the only reason that story saw so much success is because it got stuck on the first page of giantessworld.net so it got a disproportionate amount of notice. Maybe this wouldn't bug me so much if I didn't see other writers of varying skill levels doing much, much better than me with regards to social media interactions -- blogs that have existed for days get triple digit notes, blurb-sized fetish writing tweets that get shared by dozens of accounts, etc. Clearly there's a right way to do these types of things and I've just been doing them wrong lol.

Not helping whatsoever is how anti-erotica every social media seems to be. And I do mean erotica specifically. Obviously you can find tons of outright porn here on Tumblr or Twitter or basically where the fuck ever. But an account that just posts writing? Weird fucked up niche writing about fetishes? With NO pictures??? The algorithm simply will not allow it. I'm constantly under pressure to have to expand my skillset to include abilities I have not honed, leaving me with the option to either learn how to draw myself (basically taking on a third job so I can practice an art craft i don't even want to be practicing just so my main craft can get non-fucked by an invisible intangible algorithm) or, my favorite, ~hire an artist~ to make images for me so that I can at least pretend it's my writing that people enjoy and not the actual art I had to pay someone to make.

To top it all off, I just don't feel like writing any more. I've been writing giantess stories nonstop for five years and I'm basically done with it. I haven't had any ideas that genuinely interest me, no inspiration to create, everything feels like it's either been done before or it's trying way too hard to be an original concept for a size setting. More than just a case of writers block, I really don't feel joy from writing anything. On a technical level, all I can imagine is the silent criticisms, people cringing at my writing but never explaining why it's bad, because again, none of my stories ever receive any category of feedback, so I'm left wondering completely how people felt any way about a project that took me months to finish. I just have to assume that if no one is saying anything, it must be because there's nothing good to say about it; I see all sorts of dumpy little comments on other people's publications, but I get zero, implying something critically wrong with my art compared to others.

Eventually, the goal is to close the Patreon, the discord, and all other accounts -- probably only once I've caught up on all commission work and can just deactivate peacefully. By then I hope to have at least uploaded or re-uploaded everything I've written onto some place for record purposes, maybe ten years from people will feel like reacting to my writing lol. Until I fully deactivate, expect me to be basically gone, I won't be taking any extra work and won't be checking messages. I hope some of you enjoyed what I made. Thanks for reading.

[cynnaghoul]

Fineeee I GUESS I'll be a good friend and ask something

Venus's relationships with other utmv characters? :0 like the most important ones?? You can also be silly and put ocs in there tooo

TEEHEE, THANK YOU, HAKUUUU ❤️

Venus actually has a decently important role as The Oracle of the Multiverse, which sounds crazy, but there's lore.

She has the ability to hear everything in the multiverse through her antenna (kind of like a radio signal), this includes future events!! But she can only hear, she can't see.

She only discovered this ability when she was pulled out of her AU, since it's not an ability she's actually born with, it's just her antenna picking up on everything around her.

She does have important relationships with some of the other characters, so lemme give a run down!!

Ink

Ink was actually Venus' first real friend when her AU was destroyed. Her hearing allowed her to hear him all the way in the Doodlesphere, and as someone who was new to the concept of the multiverse (and with scary new hearing abilities), she assumed he was a safe presence.

Ink actually also enjoyed her company as well, he used to draw her a lot, and her hearing abilities were considered helpful to him. However, after so long of being with him in the Doodlesphere, he noticed she wasn't really thriving in the ways he knew she could, so he ended up putting her in the company of someone else. That would be Fresh.

Their friendship is super strained because she misunderstood his true intentions, but they are mostly friendly, and she does cooperate with him when he needs her omni-hearing.

Error

Venus considers him her other coworker alongside Ink. She finds herself between the two on many occasions, but doesn't seem to mind. She actually does find Error pleasant, but they still struggle to actually get along because of their lack of an energy match.

Thanks to being between Ink and Error, Venus had to make a Vow of Neutrality, promising that she would not withhold oracle information from either of them, and they would get the same information. This vow is broken when Ink breaks his truce with Error, and Venus sides with the latter instead.

They get along on the occasion, but she mostly find him to be a fun target for teasing and irriating. When he destroyed those AU's, she was very much angrier with Ink than him.

Fresh

Fresh is pretty much Venus' best friend, and the only person that knows almost everything about her.. aside from Hatter. (More on him another time!!) They're an iconic duo in the Multiverse, almost never being found separated from each other.. unless they're doing their own thing, obviously. Otherwise, they're practically attached at the hip.

They're pretty much a major headache to anybody that has the fortune of being within 30 feet of them. They have an almost perfect energy match and no idea what a volume button is, so they're loud!! Venus has known Fresh since what feels like eons, even managing to escape becoming a potential vessel.. for a bargain, of course.

Cross

This one was actually pretty complicated to get an idea for because I know she didn't like him at first. Venus thought he was a problem thanks to the X-Event and the chaos that followed, however her mind changes.

She realizes that she needs to separate her anger towards Ink's broken promises and recognize that Cross was genuinely going through a lot of internal problems. Some that even she could relate to.

She definitely attempted to speak to him while he was in the Omega Timeline, since she was already there to comfort the poor anomalies that already lost their lives or homes.

Dream

Venus doesn't typically work with Dream, but seeing as they're both emotion based, they probably team up occasionally. Especially where Venus' powers involve emotional projection, she's able to help increase the flow of positive energy to give him a decent boost.

They're friends at best, often having similar opinions on things and even similar ideals!!

Nightmare

Venus has her ears on this guy for sure. In fact, she uses her emotional abilities in The Hub (more lore on that later) to help others get rid of their negative feelings. She wants to ensure that he has trouble causing or bringing harm to anyone under the influence of their own feelings. Unfortunately, she isn't always successful.

Rue

@rainyecho 's OC

Venus actually does like Rue a lot, she considers them a good friend despite the fact that they hang around Error all the time.. but she knows better than to let that dictate her opinions on people!!

She finds them pretty odd, seeing as they're a virus, but she's no better for hanging out with the parasite, so she pushes that aside. As long as Rue doesn't become a real threat towards Venus, she believes they're totally great best friends.. or something.

Null

@hakunakii 's OC

Venus is familiar with Null as the Multiverse's form of transportation, but they don't cross paths often enough to chat all the time. Regardless, in the few times they have stopped to chat, Venus has found them rather pleasant, but confusing. She feels like they have a potential energy match, but she's not too sure.. they seem odd. But once again, she's never let that prevent her from making a friend!! Perhaps she'll have to invite them around so she can get to know them better.

Void

@demifinnyfib 's OC

Venus thinks Void is pretty silly and.. also pretty stupid, but that doesn't mean she doesn't like their company!! She pities them, actually, considering they lost their memories. She believes it's depressing for forget who you are and who you came from, but Void seems so shockingly nonchalant about it. She just can't wrap her head around them. She's very fond of them, even if she feels bad for poor Goldie's loss.

Golden Guard!Sans

@demifinnyfib 's OC

Venus comforted Goldie when he first came to the Omega Timeline with the belief that his friend was dead. She thought it was such a heavy burden for him to have to carry all on his own, especially after finding out that his friend no longer had their memories.

Her heart aches for his situation, but she chooses not to get involved. Only offering her comfort when it's necessary, and sometimes even a piece of advice for him. She's fond of him, but lately his uptight nature has made him the punchline of many of her teasing remarks.

------

That's pretty much the gist of it!!

If there are any more questions, just ask!! It's super fun to answer questions and I definitely have the time to!!

And please lemme know if I missed anyone that you guys are curious about!!

[tonydaddingham]

am i missing something in kinda comparing the entire maggie and nina situation to paris? 'cause there was no need to get them to fall in love. a&c might not be able to make people actually feel it, but they seem to have mind control down pat without much effort (or any moral quandaries). they could have waited for an angel to show up and just faked it- easy, certain way out. it's not like the idea of working together like that is even weird, not after the gabriel miracle.

so. either they missed it, which is plausible, and uhhh, renders this whole ask pointless, or *would* have moral issues with it (also plausible💀), or they're being completely ridiculous again, and would rather plan balls than actually make an effort to get themselves out of Mortal Fucking Peril (not that aziraphale necessarily knows it is). i think it would fit the pattern, honestly- when not having huge blowouts over *problems of their own making* (hey aziraphale kill this kid it'll be fine, aziraphale why won't you ditch earth with me, crowley why won't you come to heaven with me), the ineffables always seem to be constantly, aggressively orbiting eachother, making heart eyes and goofing off (cough end of the resurrectionists "not kind" cough) with 0 regard for safety except for the (very very sadly i can't find the -ennial word for every other century) occasional heart attack, and then just skipping right back down the aisle.

(hope this is coherent, i've been editing things a little too long to tell)

hello @aq-uatic my darling!!!💕

(bby im so sorry!!! i thought i had posted this ages ago and i went rooting around in the drafts to continue something else and realised i hadn't!!! im an idiot sorry!!!)

i think there is some context behind aziraphale's actions in particular with this scene:

we know that aziraphale has a fondness for maggie, that i'd argue goes slightly beyond the fondness he has for humans in general (and even then that's questionable at times), and he seems genuinely put out that he's not in a position to help her - to wiggle his fingers about, and make it happen for her (horrifying implications, aziraphale, but we move). so, whilst aziraphale obviously is prompted into the whole 'lets-make-these-two-humans-fall-in-love-bc-that's-totally-normal-and-okay' by holding the everyday record back in the bookshop, i think there is an element of aziraphale genuinely wanting to help her, and coming up with the ball is his interpretation of an organic way to do that (💀). but it doesn't justify the whole thing one little bit; despite the possibility of that being his intention, it's completely batshit - nina certainly didnt know, let alone consent, to anything, and maggie didn't either; they're not dolls for either of them to play around with.

essentially though, i agree - any logical, coherent, sensible thinking would have probably just helped them arrive at a solution that didn't involve warping reality and bringing a whole room of people under a horrifying amount of hypnosis. but you have two supernatural creatures who, in a fairly major way by the time of 2023 at least, have their sense of existing amongst humanity influenced by not only the clandestine, dramatic nature of their own story, but by their tendencies towards damsel-but-not-wholly-in-distress-ing and anti-hero-at-best-ing respectively. we have to barely scratch the surface to see the intertextuality between these traits of theirs, and where they might stem from stories told in certain books and movies (emma by jane austen, and james bond spring to mind).

they constantly talk in riddles to each other, in code and in double meanings - they may somewhat understand the general sense of what the other is saying, but it's not categorical and leaves too much room for error or misinterpretation (which, ultimately, it does). it's a constant dance circling each other, ebbing and flowing, pulling in and drawing back, but never coming together properly; it's a quadrille vs. a waltz.

it makes sense that they are so used to finding the most roundabout and convoluted ways to do things, and this continues into s2, because not only is it how it tends to go down in fiction, but also because that's literally how they've had to exist - not only so their closeness isn't detected, or so their true natures aren't suspected by their respective head offices, but also by nature of being literal supernatural creatures living amongst humans - sleeper agents, of a kind - and constantly having to exist without detection.

none of this makes it right, of course not - but i actually don't think they see any other way of going about things. they're so good at it, so well practiced, that (as just two examples) they run verbal rings around gabriel/metatron (book) and beelzebub chattering about the great vs. ineffable plans at the airfield, and they dance around the most straightforward solution to the maggie/nina problem. as for themselves and their relationship, they dont speak plainly to each other until the bandstand or final fifteen... and even then, i feel like its aziraphale that is maybe the first to break and speak plainly? idk:

i think it's clear that crowley is the more scared, and therefore the more cautious, in this regard. for all his objections attempting to distance himself as an angel compared to crowley's being a demon, aziraphale feels to me that he is the more inclined to throw caution to the wind. i think its because crowley understands the danger in blowing their cover a little more than aziraphale does - aziraphale on multiple occasions slips in nearly admitting their closeness (1800, end of 1827 as you pointed out, and when meeting with the archangels in heaven in s1) - and is still stuck in the safety that dancing around what should be plainly said affords them. they both - as you wonderfully put it - aggressively orbit each other, and breaking the holding pattern comes a little too late.

so no, i think your drawing the parallel between the Weird-Ass dynamic in 1793, how they handle the maggie/nina storyline, and then how they behave with each other, is very apt! but its, at this time, arguably all that they've known - acting in this way - and breaking the cycle is starting to happen, but won't pay its dividends until s3✨

[optimizim]

tell me abt your ocz?? (>_<)//

(first of all woah my first ask! yippee!) (second of all. this got long. i'm so very sorry.)

skutz, skee and poot are their names! i don't have them developed as much as i want to; i've just broken back into the oc-o-sphere after a couple of years of succumbing to cringe culture.

skee is a, hm, xenoecologist? 🤔 it's a really cushy job, even though it sounds scientific. he's tall, impressively so, but flunked out of invader training and sucks at anything that requires a lot of long-term commitment. essentially, his job is to explore planets with No Sentient Lifeforms and log anything interesting he finds; anything that could be useful for the empire. he's kind of bitter about sucking at every job he's ever tried but he's also not self-aware enough to make any sort of genuine improvement in his life B^)

poot is the irken equivalent of a NEET. yeah TECHNICALLY he has a job. he's skee's """"assistant"""". skee is fond of him and since poot livens up the base on whatever planet they're on, he gets to loiter doing barely anything. he's loyal, upbeat, generous, and also INCREDIBLY stupid. he's less xenophobic than most of his fellow irkens but also genuinely not any threat to the empire whatsoever by virtue of his sheer stupidity. talking to him would probably be pretty grating (and you'd feel bad for not liking him because has good intentions 😬)

(there is NO way they'd have a SIR unit. why did i draw that!!!)

skutz doesn't even really know those two even tho i drew them together. he's the one i like to think about in bed before i go to sleep :,) he's yer standard irken piece of shit. short, but "pulled himself up by the bootstraps" and got a job overlooking drones and laborers, where he got to ego trip around people who couldn't really do anything about it. way too cocky and ambitious, he took a "great opportunity!!!" to test out the interdimensional tech that was being developed in his universe. he thought he'd get famous but he ended up getting catapulted into a dimension where irkens don't exist and had to kinda rawdog existing in a universe where he has absolutely 0 influence.

i've been thinking about what aliens he might encounter in this dimension and i like the idea that they'd be VERY nature heavy but not in a way that's disconnected from technology; maybe irkens even used to exist in this dimension but their tech was absorbed into this other empire instead of em achieving dominance. but! that universe is secondary to most of my thoughts about my ocs, and i just like to think about the possibilities there before i go to bed. skee and poot have a muuuch more canon adherent sort of deal, and skutz is easy to adapt for that too.

WOW and that ended up being a lot but i'm glad its written down somewhere now 👍

[yuemoon-art]

ALSO THE CHANGE! FROM THE LETTER THAT JONATHON THROWS OUT OF THE WINDOW TO THE LETTER ON DRACULA'S HAND! PERFECT TRANSITION A+++++++

Don't mind me I've just been staring at these for a few days 😭 ahhhh I'm so honoured thank you!! Please don't be sorry for such lovely comments— now I have to rewatch the animatic while looking out for the timestamps ;) ahahahaaa :,)))) I can only say thanks again!!!! Im gonna put my response under the cut cause there ended up being so much:

0:53 Yesss glad you caught that!!!! its a reference to my DD2022 art; I decided to put it in the animatic because I think its one of my best works. HAVE to immortalise that

0:58 Heehee :3 I had so much fun making that move!! Originally it was supposed to be still but I had the thought of "hey now that ive learned keyframes I wonder what else i can do" so that was the result :)

1:25 :,) thats such a high praise, I had fun plotting out these transitions too!!!

1:31 Also another reference to one of my DD2022 arts! Had fun translating that to a more "cinematic" composition

1:33 Had no idea that was called a crybaby mole Im stealing that now on. Very happy someone noticed his beauty mark!!!

2:35 hehehehe

2:43 another case of "hm Ive learned keyframes what can I do with them" :) Im glad it looks cool!!

2:48 Yep!! plus also like a role reversal; previously it was Lucy who was entranced and helpless under Dracula's gaze. Now, it is his turn.

2:58 thanks!! I had so much fun designing them, especially the blue eyed one! Initially I forgot Stoker described her as "fair" but hm I guess you can close 2 eyes and it could be interpreted by the "beauty" meaning of "fair", rather than skin... I also genuinely forgot black people don't usually have blue eyes blonde hair but hey! Theyre vampires. No point quibbling about ""realism"" or whatever

3:03 hehehehheh. Thanks! I had so much fun drawing Dracula's defeat

3:17 HAD to draw that sunset its such a cinematic moment in the book. Stoker did good.

Also hehe yep the Art/Seward was purposeful. I love this song because it brings me so much nostalgia as the opening theme for a local tv drama. Very glad to have made it part of this animatic. Thank you for the enthusiastic dissection of this passion project aaa Ill treasure this response.

[flingmetothemoon]

Idk if this video was already uploaded onto Tumblr yet or not or if the post no longer exists, but I'll still put it up here to be safe, this video is made by KeyBlack, AKA "The Artist Formerly Known as SquigglyDigg.".

-Genuinely unpopular opinion: I prefer the idea of Maria being Sonic's close friend in the past than Shadow's. Why? Simple. The idea of Shadow wanting to avenge the death of someone who loves earth and wants him to help humans BY hating humans and wanting to destroy their world not only makes zero sense, but it makes him come off as a manchild (or I should say "Hedgechild") who throws tantrums way out of disproportion even though he's supposed to be a sympathetic character. If Maria survived (she didn't, just saying if), how would she feel if someone who is like a brother to her came back to hate the very thing she loves and completely went against her wish? Sonic being friends with her makes PERFECT sense. It'll explain why he loves nature and exploring. Fans complain about his more relaxed and aloof sides in Sonic X (half of season 2 were anime adaptations of the Sonic Adventure games) but it makes sense to me because even when he doesn't directly remember the trauma, his body that grew up with wanting to be on earth still gives him an instinct to go off on his own and appreciate beauty and his brain might be telling him to isolate himself in case if he ever were to draw too close to people, the tragedy could possibly repeat itself. Poor Blue Blur, someone give him a hug! :C

Headcanon fuel time

-Sonic was a young hoglet when Gerald took him in to use him as a base for an Ultimate Lifeform. Gerald was busy working half the time, so Sonic spent more time with his granddaughter Maria. Sonic and Maria were each other's first close childhood friends (close enough that they considered each other siblings). One of their favorite games to play was tag because it was the best way to use up energy and bond. Gerald taught Maria how to invent so one day, Maria invented Sonic his own socks and red shoes when his preteen stage finished.

-About 50 years later, Eggman found a deep-frozen body of Sonic in the deep depths of an -0 degree ocean and took him to South Island to thaw in hopes to find an opportunity to take his powers for world domination.

-When Sonic woke up from cryonics, he got amnesia and had to learn life skills again. Although he won't admit it, Sonic has self identity issues because he can't remember where he came from.

-Sonic regains his memories of his past in Space Colony ARK after the events of Sonic Adventure 2. When he gains memories of Maria, he becomes unusually depressed to the point that even his friends notice it (they're used to the upbeat and positive Sonic). He took the death of her very hard since losing Maria is like losing his sister.

And with that backstory in mind, maybe Shadow was actually Sonic's unborn brother/cousin! :O