#i genuinely feel bad lol

[tubbytarchia]

I don't know what this is all I know is that LimL Joel makes me really emotional

[raiiny-bay]

some WIPs from the 80s AU i never finished

[ef-1]

If I think about the double standard and the disparity with which the media handled Daniel in comparison to everyone else I may lose my mind.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~

(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)

[k1tty5]

Hey! If you feel like thanking a doodle request, maybe a lil Gem? Perhaps in her scientist outfit?

Thank you in advance, and I hope life gets better soon! [:

a gem for you <3

[smile-files]

nickel and balloon stuff from spring on the breakfast!!! i'm keeping in mind that in the previous episode, both of them were under the impression that their friendship wasn't real...

in a way, ii3 balloon is a lot like late ii3 cabby. of course, balloon did something indisputably immoral (manipulate and exploit others), and cabby only did something thought to be immoral (keep and use files about her fellow contestants) -- but both did something wrong and had to subsequently undergo a disproportionate amount of abuse and malignment for it, ending up with them being apologetic and submissive to avoid any chance of being framed as bad again. the biggest difference is that cabby has internalized the guilt others have attributed to her, while balloon largely hasn't -- he understands the concept of rolling with the punches for the sake of keeping good connections, but he doesn't believe he deserves it.

nickel brushes off ii2 a LOT this episode. to rid himself of his guilt regarding that time, he necessarily has to delegitimize the hatred he felt towards balloon then, thus also ridding balloon of his guilt. he expresses this all vaguely, choosing to remember ii2 fondly and saying off-hand that its baggage should be laughed off -- implying that balloon has been forgiven. reasonably, balloon is happy that nickel seems to actually believe he's changed for the better, so initially this makes him happy.

of course, though, it becomes clear that nickel just wants to shove his own actions under the rug, and balloon reasonably gets pissed off. nickel treated balloon and suitcase like complete garbage in ii2, and balloon clearly hasn't forgotten that.

"it keeps things easy." it keeps things easy to roll with the punches, to endure nickel's abuse and accept his sudden friendship. note, also, that nickel is still placing the blame on balloon: he's saying that balloon didn't want to "make things better", as if nickel and balloon ever having a rift was entirely balloon's fault, and his problem to fix.

and as we can see, nickel still hasn't fully forgiven balloon for ii1. as i've discussed before, nickel seems to secretly feel incredible guilt about how he treated balloon in ii2 (which is why he goes to such lengths to repress the whole memory of it) -- but that guilt is about the way in which he expressed his disdain and distrust of balloon, not those opinions themselves, nor the motivations for them. this is all very interesting, then -- if he still believes balloon can't change from his old, bad self, why did nickel start being friends with him at all?

i think a large part of it is his projection onto balloon. nickel sees himself in balloon: someone who screwed up big-time and isn't able to become a better person after that (according to nickel). we tend to gravitate to people similar to us, after all. i wouldn't be surprised if nickel was also trying to overcompensate for his hostility towards balloon in ii2 by being very friendly with him in ii3, thereby helping him forget that he was ever hostile to him at all.

the most fascinating thing to me about balloon and nickel's relationship is how impersonal it is for balloon. he seems to value what nickel's affection represents rather than nickel himself -- and it represents that he's been forgiven. anyone who saw balloon and nickel's conflict in ii2, which was a product of balloon's nastiness in ii1 and nickel's subsequent inability to forgive that nastiness, would likely come to accept balloon and forgive him themselves if they then saw nickel being friendly with him -- because nickel is the epitome of the ii contestants' anger at him, and nickel of all people (seemingly) forgiving him would imply that he's really changed. the relationship is almost entirely a symbol in that regard. i don't think balloon has much residual guilt about is actions in ii1 -- he feels like he's adequately addressed them and changed -- but nickel having a positive relationship would be helpful in affirming that stance and proving to himself that he really has changed.

i wouldn't say it's cruel of balloon to keep this relationship going on under that pretense, but it is backhanded, and it helps explain why he was ever willing to accept nickel's friendliness unchallenged. he wanted his crimes to finally be laid to rest once and for all, and keeping nickel on good terms with him would let that happen. people would finally shut up about it. up until now, nickel wasn't explicitly denying his past cruelty towards balloon anyway, so balloon would be able to ignore that he neglected to ever bring it up; now, though, nickel is denying not only what he did to balloon but also to suitcase, which balloon is not able to tolerate. now that he's confronted nickel about that though, nickel snaps back with his condemnation of what balloon did in ii1, thereby uprooting the social stasis balloon had been able to maintain precisely because nickel refused to bring anything up before. in a way, then, balloon is purposefully shoving the past under the rug, just like nickel is.

we can't forget, though, that nickel has his own complex about fearing that he's incapable of change and incapable of forming positive, genuine relationships with people. balloon is essentially revealing that, in a way, he wasn't really friends with nickel -- at least not in the way nickel wished and fooled himself into thinking they were. if balloon truly were friends with nickel like that, then that would mean that balloon had forgiven him for his cruelty in ii2, and perhaps that he really has changed... but no. balloon hasn't forgiven him. why should he? nickel never apologized -- and given how he never apologized, it's impossible that he could've changed anyway: nickel doesn't want to apologize because that means addressing his guilt and allowing himself to feel it. he wants the forgiveness to be handed to him on a silver platter, without him having to do all of the painful work, and he's incredibly upset when it isn't. he wants to not be a bad person, but in order to do that, he has to feel like one, and he really doesn't want to. he hates who he was and doesn't want to associate with it at all.

(note how it's the suitcase robot who says "you can say sorry" when nickel says that nothing can be done about making things better...)

there's clearly an immeasurable amount of resentment these two have been harboring for each other throughout this season, which they'd only been hiding for the sake of fooling themselves into thinking they've changed (nickel) or thinking that others think they've changed (balloon). and now that they've let themselves explode with anger, partly related to the lies they'd been telling themselves falling apart, they yell at each other and balloon drops nickel down a hole!

ah, balloon and nickel's relationship... it's bizarre, it's toxic, it's convoluted, it's shady, and it's incredibly sad. i'm glad i'm revisiting ii3, especially this episode -- i used to be utterly baffled by nickel's writing, particularly in spring on the breakfast, but now it makes complete sense to me. also, i used to think balloon was entirely the victim in this relationship, while now i know that he has his own faults and own baggage in that regard. it's weird -- they hate each other, but at the same time they're dying to be liked by one another. god i love these freaks...

[ccelicaa]

IM SO SORRY FOR NOT HAVING A LOT OF ART TO POST LATELY 😭This is a wip I've been working on in tandem with the first chapter of my fic that i keep talking ab 🧍but just haven't finished🧍 don't hype me up i need to finish it already :angry:

College and classes have been keeping me busy...so once again I'm sorry for not having anything finished to show you guys rn 😢😢 but I'm hoping to put something out soon!! and will answer asks and dms soon aswell!!

ok yap over

[kabutoden]

FUCK THE KARKAT VANTAS PLUSH THEY CUT ME OFF FOR FUCKING REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

I WAS GOING TO MAKE A KARKAT VANTAS PLUSH AND SELL IT TO THE PEOPLE!! I WAS GOING TO DO THAT!!! I HAD A MARKETABLE PLUSHIE DESIGN AND EVERYTHING!!!! DO YOU SEE THIS FUCKER??? DO YOU SEE HIM??? DO YOU FUCKING SEE HIM?

I SAID IT TO ALL MY FREINDS!! TO MY FAMILY!! 'gonna make a marketable plushie out of this dog hes sellable as fuck' FUCK!!!! THEY FUCKING GOT TO IT BEFORE ME AND THEIR DESIGN ISNT EVEN GOOD!!! WHY IS THE HAIR LIKE THAT ITS FUCKING makeship THEY CAN MAKE SOME PRETTY QUALITY WORK!! ITS GOING TO COST 30 DOLLARS YOU DIDNT FUCKING NEED TO skIMP ON THE HAIR!!!!! PROMISE!!! WHAT IS THIS A FUCKING FNAF PLUSH??? ARE YOU JOKING??? WHO DID YOU COMMISSION TO MAKE THIS PLUSH DEISNGNNNNN WHY IS THE HAIR FLATTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

I WAS GOING TO DO THAT!!! IT WAS HALF THE REASON I MADE THIS STINKIN COMIC AND NOW I HAVE 60 MORE PAGES I WANT TO FINISH NOOOOO FUCKKKKKKKKKK NOW I HAVE OFFICIAL COMPETITIONNN WHYYYY

its fine. im fine im. FIIIIIINEEEEEEEE. its on me for not working on aphids... f in the fucking chat (this post is not very serious)

[genericpuff]

vent post

[sergle]

perhaps it doesn't need to be that Deep, but some of y'all's relationship with age and youth truly stresses me out. you're doing this thing

like nevermind that using reaction pics/gifs in place of a text response is not something that Olds Do, if it's becoming less common on tumblr, i think that's been in the past like. 2 - 4 years. nevermind that... you truly stress me out using Thirty Five as the old and out of touch age to make a joke about. oh my god girl... 35.... please!!! you don't need to be so scared of aging!!! 35 is young! the imaginary 35 year old mom being used for this joke is a Young Woman! my first instinct is to make jokes abt how I am, in fact, geriatric (which I like to do) but I gotta break character and be like. hey you guys don't Actually think that 30 is elderly, right. we're joking when we say we're old, right?? you aren't actually internalizing that. right??????

also I spent like 5 years curating my Fotos Folder and I've got so many good ones... so I am actually probably gonna keep using them when I AM old. I love these images

[proteusolm]

Every once in a while I'll get thinking about how unnecessarily cruel the dentistry industry is and get sooo mad. I feel like no other branch of medicine has made so little progress in improving the comfort of the patient other than maybe gynecology. Ever had a dental surgery? I've had several and it's grotesque that being conscious for that is the norm. I'd rather have surgery while awake practically anywhere else on my body. I won't go into the gross details, but it is much too close to your senses. You don't want to hear, feel, taste, smell being surgerized that up close and personal even with perfect local anaesthetic. Pain isn't the sole aspect of surgery with the potential to distress someone. It changed me from a great patient to someone who refuses to go to a dentist outside of emergencies and pulled my own permanent retainers out with pliers when they broke.

[forcebookish]

"topmew don't like each other," "topmew only tolerate each other because they're in love," "topmew were never happy together"

meanwhile, topmew throughout their relationship:

seriously, are you all robots? do you not know what smiles are? what laughter is? fun? y'all are weird

[bacchuschucklefuck]

love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest

[qprpbj]

whenever i see ppl have darry as straight im like okay…….. wait a minute

[ribbonpinky-art]

sideyshowy bobby