#i need to do something fun while i still can bc i’m starting at uni next month

[raiiny-bay]

some WIPs from the 80s AU i never finished

[allmoshnobrain]

Hi love!! Since requests are open, can I request Cronos trying to out-drink the reader but she manages to out-drink him and he’s super impressed? Thank you!

🌻🌻

𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐝 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐞𝐧

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

cronos (venom) x fem!reader | word count: 2,6k | requests are open! send yours here

“Yeah?” he chuckled, seemingly unfazed by your annoyance. “Why don’t you prove it then, love?” Oh, you thought. He’s not the type who likes being challenged. Somehow, that information piqued your interest. You looked at him, your eyes meeting for a moment as the smile on his lips grew a bit more mischievous; was he playing with you?

✦ on this fic: cronos (venom) x fem!reader, language, drinking

✦ a/n: i've been DYING to write for cronos for a while and i'm glad i finally did! this was such a fun request and honestly i'm kind of in love with him on this one lol i may make this an au bc i already have a few ideas for future parts so requests and suggestions are appreciated. hope you guys like it! ❤

You had to admit; going back home from uni for your first holidays felt a bit weird. 

Not because anything had changed back home, but because you felt like a totally different person than you were just a few months ago, before you’d left. Plus, bringing your best mate Laura to meet your family had to be a bit unusual, right? But Laura’s parents were too busy traveling the world without her again, so you just had to do something. That’s just how you were.

Of course, being home meant one thing: dealing with your older twin brother, Philip. Which wasn’t all bad, except for that lovely old rivalry that made you compete over pretty much everything. You just hoped the days at home would be a nice mix of peace and fun. You needed a break, after all.

You should’ve known it wouldn’t be that simple.

“Hey, there!” your brother called out as you walked in, a half-empty beer bottle in hand. You could hear the TV blaring from the living room, probably a sports match. “Was starting to think you wouldn’t show up.”

“Yeah, our bus got delayed,” you said. “This is Laura, by the way,” you added, pointing to your friend, who gave your brother a shy smile. You frowned, noticing Philip seemed to be home alone. “So, where’s Mum and Dad?”

“Oh, they haven’t told you? They’re on a business trip, but they’ll be back by Monday,” Philip said casually, and you sighed. Well, they could’ve mentioned it, but Monday wasn’t that far off. It was Saturday morning, so you’d only have to wait two days to see your parents again. “They asked me to tell you to ring them as soon as you got home, though. I’ve got their hotel number.”

“Okay, will do. Just let me and Laura take our bags upstairs and change into something more comfy.”

“Oh, and…” Philip hesitated, and you looked at him, an eyebrow raised. You just knew when your brother talked like that, it meant trouble. “Uh, I’ve invited some of the boys over today for a small, like, party? If that’s alright.”

“Phil, what the hell? A party?” you exclaimed. “Have you told Mum and Dad?”

“Course not,” he snorted. “Come on, it’ll be fun. You and Laura can join in. I told them I’d have some hot birds over anyway.”

“Oh, fuck off,” you shoved him softly before heading for the stairs. “I’m not cleaning up any of your mates’ mess, you hear me?”

“Love you too,” he yelled as you walked upstairs. You rolled your eyes, and Laura giggled.

“What?” you asked, and she shrugged.

“You two are cute,” she smiled, and you huffed. “So, guess we’re having a party tonight, then?”

“Looks like we’ve got no choice,” you mumbled.

“Come on, it’s not like you don’t enjoy a good party yourself! It can’t be that bad, can it?” she tried to cheer you up. You sighed.

“Ugh, it’s just… I was expecting to get home, see Mum and Dad, maybe watch some chick flicks and eat some ice cream. Not to have loud music and drinks all night. I’m still knackered from our last pub crawl, alright?”

“Alright, grumpy,” Laura chuckled. “You should definitely grab something to eat. I know a hungry girl when I see one.”

You rolled your eyes but smiled. You knew Laura was right — you were knackered, but after a hot shower and some food, you’d probably get excited about the party later. Even though your brother’s friends were… chaotic, at best. Phil worked at a small music venue across town, so most of his friends were into the music scene in some way, which made for quite the interesting crowd.

The day flew by, and before you knew it, people started showing up at your place. You and Laura were finishing getting ready when you heard the familiar sound of distorted guitars coming from downstairs. You should’ve known a party with Phil’s friends would be a heavy metal one.

“What’s that racket?” Laura asked, looking shocked by your brother’s musical tastes, which made you chuckle.

“Heavy metal. Phil’s a fan, you know,” you said, focusing on finishing your eyeliner. You watched Laura’s reflection as she rummaged through her luggage. “Hope you like Iron Maiden.”

When you finally got downstairs, the house was already packed. You sighed, biting your lower lip softly as you searched for your older brother in the growing crowd. If he was going to throw a party on your first day back from uni, you hoped he at least had the sense to get you something to drink.

You found him in the kitchen, laughing loudly with two guys you’d never seen before. One was blonde, with a mustache and a cigarette in hand, while the other was this tall, dark-haired guy with massive arms, leaning against the wall. He looked up when you walked in, and your eyes met for a brief moment, but you ignored him, heading straight for your brother.

“Oi, fuckhead,” you called out, and Phil raised an eyebrow. “What kind of party has no booze?”

“Oh, so now you’re in a partying mood?” he grinned. “Course we got drinks. You think we’d have a party without any booze, especially with this lad?” He slapped the dark-haired guy’s shoulder, who chuckled, his eyes meeting yours for a moment again. “He’s the biggest drinker I know!”

“You’re joking, right?” Laura cut in, and Phil looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “You’re saying he’s the biggest drinker you know when your sister’s right here?”

“Laura!” you exclaimed, feeling your cheeks flush.

“What? You’re the biggest drinker I know, no contest. No one can compete with you at a party, girl.”

“Nice to know that,” Phil said, and you looked back at him, seeing a cheeky smile on his lips that made you huff and roll your eyes. “I wonder what Mum and Dad would think of that, eh?”

“You’re not telling them, unless you want me to spill about your little party,” you grumbled.

“Yeah, well, I’m not telling them because I don’t believe it,” he teased. “No way you’re a bigger drinker than Cronos.”

Cronos. That was a curious name, but you figured it had to be a stage name, right? No way someone would actually be called that. You bit your lower lip, frowning. With the way Phil was sucking up, you knew the guy had to be someone important, at least in the metal scene. Maybe he was a musician? He definitely looked the type.

“Come on, mate,” the dark-haired guy, Cronos, finally spoke, a small smile on his lips. You could tell he was loving the attention your brother was giving him, which only made you more annoyed. “No need to put your sis down because of me.”

“You don’t need to defend me,” you blurted out, and Cronos raised an eyebrow. “Phil’s just being his usual daft self,” you looked at your brother, who scoffed at you. “Besides, I’m probably a better drinker than you, anyway.”

“Yeah?” he chuckled, seemingly unfazed by your annoyance. “Why don’t you prove it then, love?”

Oh, you thought. He’s not the type who likes being challenged. Somehow, that information piqued your interest. You looked at him, your eyes meeting for a moment as the smile on his lips grew a bit more mischievous; was he playing with you? 

“Is this a dare?” you asked. 

“If you say so,” he said, his grin widening. 

“Oh, this is gonna be fun,” Laura giggled. “So, are we having a drinking contest or what?”

“Alright,” Phil grinned in that oh-boy-you’re-so-gonna-lose way that always wound you up when he dared you to do something. “I’ll get the glasses and the beer.”

You waited while Phil rummaged around the kitchen for some pint glasses and got everything sorted. You bit your lip, trying to stop the blush creeping onto your cheeks as you felt Cronos’ eyes on you. Maybe you shouldn’t have challenged him — you barely knew the man. But Phil’s endless ways of winding you up made it hard not to. Your annoyance often spilled over onto his loud friends, his loud music, his loud everything. You loved your brother, sure, but sometimes it felt like he still saw you as the shy little kid you used to be.

And you were ready to prove him wrong again.

“Right, here we go,” Phil said, plonking two pint glasses on the table, then cracking open a beer and pouring it into one of them. “How about we bet on who finishes these first? Winner gets, I don’t know, we’ll think about something.”

“Maybe the loser should have to do anything the winner wants,” Cronos suggested, that same cheeky grin on his face. The way he said it made your cheeks burn, and you rolled your eyes as Laura giggled.

“Mate, if you’re trying to pull my sister, you’ll need a better plan,” Phil laughed. “Good luck getting her to do anything after she loses to you.”

“Can you stop talking about me like I’m not here?” you snapped, trying to ignore the heat in your cheeks. “Besides, I’m not losing.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Phil said, waving you off as he finished pouring the beers. “Well, here we go. Grab your glasses, everyone, this is gonna be fun!”

You grabbed your pint glass, feeling the cold against your palm. You knew being the fastest drinker didn’t really mean being the biggest drinker, but you weren’t about to lose to Phil and his stupid rivalry, his stupid parties, and his stupid friends. You wanted to win, to wipe that cheeky grin off his face — and Cronos’ face too. If he thought he could use you for a laugh, he had another thing coming. It was time to channel every bit of determination and experience you’d gained in the drinking department since starting uni and win this.

“Ready… Set… Go!” Phil yelled, and you quickly lifted the glass to your lips. You closed your eyes, trying to down as much beer as you could, as fast as you could. You could hear Laura cheering you on, and, as quickly as it had started, it was over. You slammed the empty glass down, trying to catch your breath as you wiped off some of the beer that had dribbled down your chin, a triumphant smile spreading across your face as you saw Cronos finishing his beer — a good ten seconds after you.

“Ha!” you shouted, looking at Phil. “Told you I’d win! Maybe next time don’t use your mates to try and beat me.”

“Oh, shut it,” Phil grumbled. “Never knew going to uni would turn you into a lush.”

“You’re such a sore loser,” you laughed.

“It’s alright, mate,” Cronos cut in, putting a hand on Phil’s shoulder. He looked at you, the cheeky grin now gone, replaced by an impressed look in his eyes. “Your sister’s cool, you know? Maybe you should be a bit nicer to her.”

You and Phil stared at him, surprised. You could see Phil was also a bit miffed that his friend was taking your side, but hey, you weren’t going to complain when Phil’s antics had been winding you up all day.

“Yeah, whatever,” Phil grumbled and stomped out of the kitchen. You rolled your eyes — he was probably off to sulk somewhere, and you weren’t about to chase after him. Sometimes it felt like you were the older one, not him.

You looked around the kitchen, trying to spot Laura and ask if she fancied going somewhere else — maybe to a pub. But then you realized she wasn’t in the kitchen anymore. Neither was the blonde guy you’d seen around with Phil and Cronos earlier.

Suddenly, it was just you and him.

“So,” Cronos said, and you quickly looked up at him, blushing when he stepped closer. “What do you want me to do?”

“W... What?” you stammered, and he chuckled.

“I said whoever lost should do whatever the winner wanted, didn’t I? You won.”

“I don’t want anything. It was just a stupid game,” you said, and he chuckled.

“You sure about that?” he asked, and you blushed as he took another step. He was tall, much taller than you, and the way he moved nearer made your heart race a bit faster. You’d found him annoying pretty much from the get-go, just like you always did with Phil’s friends, but now that he was closer you could notice the curve of his lips and the way his eyes sparkled with a playful, almost tender glint.

Maybe necking all that beer at once wasn’t the best idea, after all.

“You could tell me your name,” you said, more to break the silence than anything. He blinked, looking a bit confused, and you chuckled nervously. “I mean, is it really Cronos? That’s such a different name.”

“Oh. Oh, no, that’s a stage name,” he laughed. You could see the cheeky grin soften into something a bit more genuine for a moment — still playful, but more real. It made you curious again, wanting to know more about him. “I’m in a band, you know. My real name’s Conrad.”

“That’s a cool name, too,” you said, and he smiled.

“You sure you don’t want anything else?” he asked, his voice almost hopeful, making you blush. Well, you were on your own in the kitchen, weren’t you? For a moment, you wondered what might happen if you asked him to…

No. What the hell were you thinking?

“I’m good,” you mumbled, your cheeks burning.

“Alright then,” he said, and you let out a small sigh as he stepped back. “I’m heading back to the party to grab something stronger. Fancy coming with?”

“Yeah, sure. I need to track down Laura anyway,” you agreed, then paused before looking at him. “Um, it was nice meeting you.”

“Likewise,” he grinned. You felt your heart race when he placed a hand on the small of your back. “Shall we?”

You headed back into the living room, which was now packed. The place was definitely heaving. Cronos gave you a grin before joining his friends, and you scanned the room until you spotted Laura, sitting on the couch with a polite but bored smile while some long-haired guy chatted her up.

“Oh, my friend’s back!” she said when she spotted you. She stood up and linked her arm with yours. “Sorry, I’ve gotta run. Nice chat!” she added, and you bit back a laugh at the look of frustration on the guy’s face.

“You left the poor man hanging,” you said, and she giggled.

“Oh, he started going on and on about his favorite band as soon as I mentioned I didn’t know them,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Are all your brother’s friends like this?”

“Not all of them,” you replied, glancing up to see Cronos laughing loudly with his blonde friend. Laura’s eyes followed yours, and she grinned.

“So?” she asked, her voice full of expectation. “Did you two kiss or what?”

“Did we what? What are you talking about?” you asked, blushing, and she laughed. 

“Seriously, did you not see the way he was eyeing you up? That’s why I left you alone — thought he might’ve tried to kiss you or something.”

You blinked, shocked. It’s not like you hadn’t noticed his clear interest in you, but you thought maybe he was just curious. Curious like you were about him — you could tell he was an interesting guy. But you obviously didn’t expect him to be into you, even though the way he had looked at you while you were alone made your stomach flutter with unexpected butterflies. 

“Don’t be silly, Laura. Of course we didn’t kiss,” you muttered. 

But when he glanced over at you from across the room and your eyes met, you couldn’t help but maybe wish he had.

Wouldn’t be wrong to have just a taste, would it?

[hajimine]

THIS IS GOODBYE !! >:)

long story short, i wanna focus on my uni work + my real life more but tumblr is way too addicting so i’m gonna have to kick it out of my life entirely <3

but for all you nosy people out there (yes you reading this rn i know you wanna snoop around mhm) here’s a way-too-long explanation as to why i’m gonna go ghost ! woo !

on this post i’ll also be answering some of the asks i frequently get so please read through them before asking again ! having to repeat myself again and again gets really tiring v.v

KEEPING IN CONTACT

discord: send an ask off anon/dm me !

new blog: anyone without bad intentions are welcome, moots or not ! just send an ask off anon <3

THE BASICS

why are you leaving? i’ve sort of explained it before the cut but yeah, tumblr is a lot of fun and i do still enjoy writing, but i feel like i waste way too much time on here and get nothing valuable in return, so i’d rather focus my time and energy on something much more important to me like my studies.

but.. you can just cut down on your posting, why leave entirely? nah im an all or nothing type of gal so that won’t work for me. i’ll go back down the obsessive rabbithole and repeat the cycle, so i’d rather do a full detox yk?

wtf why all of a sudden? i know i know sorry lol :,) i just realized that i need to get my shit together and set my priorities straight and this is the best way to do it.

why are you making such a big deal out of this? shhhhhhhut up. some people asked me about it and they’re curious, so if you aren’t, then gtfo ^^ also i don’t want to leave without an explanation bc i’ve been on the receiving end before and i know that it’s not a pleasant feeling to find out that someone you liked/followed disappeared without warning.

THE BLOG

will you deactivate? no probably not. i love this blog it has lots of good memories :>

will you delete your works? as of now, nope. but there’s a pretty big possibility that i’ll say fuck it and delete everything so enjoy them while they last hehe

do you have a new blog? yep! it’s a personal blog though, and i might or might not write again on the new blog—so don’t get your hopes up. if you do want to keep chatting with me, i’m more than happy to hang out with you there! (i won’t be as active there as i was here though)

are you gonna continue writing? in the long run: most probably yeah. i love writing so i’ll probably find my way back here (or on ao3!) but right now, i need to learn what kind of things i want to prioritize my energy on, and writing fanfiction is just… not it lol

blog giveaway? no go away

。。。

braindump:

personally, i’ve had my fair share of discourses and i have come across some nasty people in the various fandoms i’m in, but i don’t think it’s fair to hate an entire group of people just because some people are absolute shitheads. so no, i’m not leaving bc i hate the hq fandom or the jjk fandom or whatever the fuck, i enjoyed my time here bc i never took tumblr seriously—all my love goes to the fandoms tho i hope u guys won’t go up in flames w the amount of dumb discourses i see on dash v.v also no, i’m not leaving bc of hate or anything like that please don’t worry!

i’ve only been here since october 2020 (and started this blog in dec) but it’s been a lot of fun !! so thank you so much to everyone who has interacted with me and my content, all my moots, my lovely anons and followers, i wouldn’t have stayed here if it weren’t for u guys xoxo. also, i’ve met some of my genuine close friends on here, and i have this dumb site to thank for that :>

and to those mfs who have sent me anon hate, talked shit behind my back, plagiarized me, stolen my ideas, stirred up discourse just for the funzies, etc, u guys are disgusting and i’m glad im not gonna see u again. i hope u get well soon. or not. idc <3

if you’ve read this far and you still wanna snoop around well uh, feel free to ask me anything and i’ll try my best to answer >:)

。。。

@ anons i hope u don’t mind that i’m answering your questions this way whoops

[miyaniacs]

CHAPTER THREE

NAVIGATION // Characters // Chapter Two

summary: Reader: female; 20 years old ; Apparently you know something… but what this something is you still got to find out.But curses, good and bad sorcerer now want to get you into their hands.Ending up in the hands of the good ones, y/n finally meets her old best friend again - Yuji. Now Yuji and his friends make it their mission to keep you save in this whole new world. Days turn into weeks and you become closer and closer to your ‚bodyguards‘

Warnings: slight NSFW (nothing explicit), mentions of blood (like only a drop of blood), bad writing in the middle bc i was unable to do it better andddd typos.

A/N: Hey.. sorry it took so long, but it was all so stressful and confusing with my BA. I don’t really like this chapter but i like the idea i got at the end of it haha Sorry if this is bad. Feedback, Comments, Reblogs are appreciated.

Your eyes widen and you quickly look down. Big mistake. Now your eyes are glued to his incredibly big muscles that show through his shirt.

You want to extend your hand and just touch them.

How is it possible for a human being to be this... this... just damn.

His arms cross over his chest. His biceps and triceps are flexed, slightly squishing his chest muscles, making them appear even bigger.

Your mouth hangs slightly open and your eyes begin to wander up again.

To his sharp jaw, then to a scar on the corner of his lips, his lips which look slightly chapped but still incredibly kissab-

WAIT.

STOP.

STOOOOOP.

Besides all the hot things about him the way he looks down at you, you feel frightened.

Raising his right eyebrow he chuckles.

And god it sounds hot.

“It’s not really polite to stare at the man you bumped into.”

“I- I- omg I’m sooo sorry.” You stutter and look down on your hands. He was right - you really embarrassed yourself right now.

“It’s fine, haven’t really felt it anyways.”

You really don’t know what to say or do, so you just keep on starring down at your hands. Something about him makes you feel so small.

“So... what brings you here babygirl?”

“Uhm.. just wandering around...” you mumble.

“Huh... and why is that?” He asks, amused by the state you’re in.

“Got too much on my mind.” You finally look up at his green eyes again.

There’s a glint in them.. but you can’t really make out what it is.

“Mhh you know I’m a good listener.”

“I don’t even know you.”

“Toji.”

“Huh?”

“My name- now you know me Y/n.”

“Wait how do you - wait no forget it, probably everyone around here now knows who I am.” You roll your eyes and plop down on the grass.

Toji sits down next to you and leans his head on his knee, looking over to you.

“So?” He asks.

“ I mean.. you probably know about the whole power thing and me right?”

“Yes I do.” He says and for a second there’s a small dangerous look in his eyes, which you obviously missed.

“And now they want to kill me, but this strange teacher promised me to not let that happen...” you sigh, “ but that isn’t really the real problem. Everyone expects me to stay here with them... But... no one thinks about the fuckin fact that I have nothing with me. Like I need some clean underwear? And my Uni stuff... and clothes... and arghhhh.... “ you sigh again and let yourself fell backwards into the grass.

“Oh yeah, why should you care if someone wants to kill you, when in fact the real problem is that you need to pass your finals.” He chuckles.

“I know I know... I just want to think about normal stuff..”

“I mean... I could distract you , if that’s what you want?” He smirks and glances down at you.

“Welll... depends on what we’re talking about.”

“Depends on what you want.” He lays down and rests his face on his hand.

Trying your best, you keep on starring into the sky and not look to your right.

A hookup with a hot stranger does sound like something that is appropriate to do during this time.

You bite your lip and keep on starring at the sky. The sun is slowly setting, which turns the whole sky into a beautiful pinkish orange light.

“Surprise me.” You say, trying to be cheeky, as you turn to your right and look at him.

Liking his lips, he smirks and gets up.

Confused you sit up and see him extending his hand.

Hesitating for a second, you finally lay your, comparably small hand, in his and he pulls you up as if you weight nothing at all.

“Where are we going?” You ask as he continues to hold your hand and drags you with him, further away from the buildings of the school.

“Mhhh you’ll see.” He simply says and keeps walking, slightly speeding up.

After a few more minutes, the buildings are barely to see and the anxiety starts creeping up inside of you. Why the fuck did you go with a stranger.

A stranger that is way stronger than you.

He’s not that hot, at least not hot enough to risk your life.

At least you’re now walking down a street, with other people around... maybe if you scream loud enough...

“And we’re here.” He stops in front of a building.

“Wh..Where are we.” You stutter and look up at him.

“My apartment.” He smirks and opens the front door.

“Ohh..”

After five more pairs of stairs, he stops at the door down the floor.

“Come on in.” He opens the door and holds the door open for you.

“Don’t worry, I won’t kidnap you or anything.” He chuckles.

Carefully you walk inside and hear him closing the the door behind him, locking it.

Whatever you expect his apartment to look like, it’s not this.

The room, is rather a loft.

Most of the walls are covered in windows, that reach down to the floor.

The bed is on the right, the kitchen on the left.

Everything looks modern and simple.

The most prominent colors aren’t real colors - Black and white dominate everything.

Some green touches thanks to a few plants.

Two Katanas hang right above the wall over the bed.

The bed is rather low, yet big with simple white sheets.

The kitchen is white too, all the electro stuff black, the few dishes that are shown, look modern and expensive.

In the middle of the room, are two big black leather couches with matching arm chairs. In contrast to the rest of the room, those look old - the expensive kind of old, not the worn out old.

“You can move.”

Turning around you see Toji leaning against the closed door, arms crossed over his chest.

“Uhm..” You look around not sure where to go. You don’t even know why you’re here.

“The couch.” He lays his hands on your shoulders and shoves you towards said couches, pushing you down on one. The leather is soft and you immediately sink into them.

“Relax, I thought you’re more fun.” He rolls his eyes and runs his hand through his black hair.

“I - I shouldn’t have come with you.. Uhm.. the others are probably looking for me.” You stutter. You really should not be here. What is wrong with you. Coming with a stranger. A total stranger. Why did you say surprise me. This wasn’t you. You tend to be more careful.

“Mhh... well let them search. You’re here now.”

“You don’t get it, they said it’s dangerous for me being alone.”

“But you aren’t alone.” He smirks and leans down his finger tracing over your cheekbone, down to your lips.

“And who said, that I’m not the one they try to protect you from?” He leans closer.

You can feel his breath on your skin. Your heart races.

He is right.

You had a bad feeling about him all the time.

Why did you come with him.

Fuck.

Your phone, you need to text Yuji and sent him your location or try to escape.

But even tough you know this is what you need to do... Your body doesn’t listen to you.

“Perfect. I always like the bad ones.” And with that you kiss him.

Why?

You really don’t know. Your body moves at its own, while a voice in your head screams and tells you to run - yet your hands wrap around his neck and you pull him closer.

His hands find your waist and he easily lifts you up, carrying you towards his bed.

“That’s the distraction I had in mind.” You purr against his lips.

His kisses travel down to your jaw, neck, cleavage...

Opening your eyes you star at the night sky. Your fingers trace over the soft cold grass.

Wait what?

Why are you outside.

Why are you- wait are you alone?

Quickly you sit up and look around.

Yes. You are alone.

And still near the small forest.

But... why are you alone...

You talked with someone... what was his name again... Toji!

Where is he?

“Y/N!”

“Y/NNNNNN!”

“YES?” You call out.

From the distance you can spot two figures running towards you.

“Y/N!” Yuji screams and speeds up.

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!” He screams and falls down on his knees.

“H- here..” you say and look up at the other person and screaming when you look into the same eyes you saw... what in your dream? Or whatever it was.

“What?” Megumi asks annoyed.

“YOU!”

“Me?”

“What’s with him?” Yuji asks confused.

“Uhmmm.. nothing.. I walked into a tree.. my head is still.. fuzzy.” You say, remembering your dream. Your hand reaches up and touches the exposed skin on your neck. You can still feel his kisses.

Who is he.

And why does he look like Yujis friend.

Confused you walk back to the dorms with the two.

On the whole way they complain about you not answering your phone, worrying them, etc. Apparently everyone was looking for you.

But shouldn’t anyone found you before?

You haven’t walked that far away...

___

It’s past midnight and you’re sitting on the ground in your room.

You can’t sleep and think back to when you arrived back at the dorms.

Everyone seemed relieved when you came back with Yuji and Megumi and asked where you’ve been. After you told them, leaving out the Toji part, Gojo was confused. According to him, he went through the while forest and you haven’t laid near it then.

You tried to lighten up the mood by joking about his blindfold, but he wasn’t in the joking mood and quickly cut you off and dragged you away from the others.

“Where have you really been?” He had asked you, without his blindfold on. His blue eyes practically starred into your soul.

“Literally where I told you.”

“IF you’ve been there, i would have saw you. Also... where did those come from then?” He asked you and pulled down your collar of your shirt. Dark blue marks cover your skin.

“I don’t remember me leaving them.” His eyes travel back up to your, now red, face.

“Uhm ... so ... I ...”

“Listen. I don’t care about whoever you’re fucking with, but keep your sex life low - at least until we figured out this whole mess. You don’t know about this world and who to trust and who not.” He stares at you and you only nod.

“GOOD.” He smiles, his character changed again.

“As a last resort, you know where my room is.” He winks.

There’s a knock on your door and you groan. Who tf visits you at this time.

“Yes?” You open it and before you can scream a large hand covers your mouth.

“Missed me?”

“Sukuna?!!” You mumble against his hand while he pushes you inside of the room.

“Yes my little pet.” He smirks and closes the door, “ When I remove my hand, you know better than to scream, yes?”

You nod and he removes his hand.

“Good girl.” He purrs and his sharp nail runs down your cheek and you feel your skin opening.

His eyes are fixed on you, while he brings his finger closer to his lips, licking up the small drop of blood.

“Beautiful. Just as I remember it.” His eyes roll back and a grin spreads on his face.

“I heard you had some fun today?” He opens one of his eyes and nods towards your neck.

“I- uhm... I don’t know.” You answer truthfully.

“Huh? Was it that bad?” He chuckles.

“No... I mean.. I don’t even know if it was real..” you open up to him.

Why are you opening up to him? TO HIM?

“Mh... that’s the seal puppy.” He smiles and sits down on your bed.

“Seal?” You ask confused and sit down next to him.

“This.” His finger tips on the spot on over your collarbone.

“The mark?”

“Yeah yeah... its real name is the infinity seal. When it’s activated an ancient power starts to ... well run trough your blood.” He lays down on the bed.

“You know ... it doesn’t only give power to others. It helps you too. Makes you stronger, faster, gives you some sort of sixth sense.”

“For what?”

“For well... Everything? My Queen... your... well ancestor I guess, told me it feels like a different person, living in your head... they warn you if you’re in danger, give you the right answer when you only have seconds to act, they just .. help you get what you want.. what you need.. what’s good for you...” he glanced up at you.

You immediately think of that strange feeling of your body moving against your will, while being with Toji.. was that ‘person’ telling you that you needed sex?? When you think about it, you really are less stressed now. Or were them the one telling you to run?

“You felt them?” He sits up and rests his chin on your shoulder.

“Oh yes... you did...” he leans closer to your ear.

“How did it feel like? Finally doing what you want to do... not caring about the consequences... or who you might hurt...” his hand creeps around your waist and pulls you towards his chest, “just doing what is good for You.”

“I- I- No... I felt bed,..., I knew the other would look for me and...”

“Nahhh nah nah... yet you didn’t listen to that part of you, why?”

“The other feeling was stronger.”

“See... They know what you want. What is good for you...” his fingers run up and down on your waist.

“Then... why .... why don’t I remember coming back here.” You stare at the door, not feeling his hand moving to your back pocket or realizing the situation you are in.

“You’re simply not used to the power. Your memories will come back eventually and the more you get used to them... you won’t get those blackouts.” His lips gaze over your neck.

“Why are you telling me all of this.” You breath out.

“Because I want you to trust me.” His hand leaves your waist and grabs your chin instead, turning your head to face him, he adds, “And I want you to know everything. I know that the white haired idiot won’t tell you everything. He’ll simply tell you what will help him - but I … I want you to understand the whole power, I want you to know everything before you choose to share this power with someone.” His thumb rubs the skin on your face.

“Sukuna..” you whisper and stare in his eyes, “what if they decide to kill me..”

“I already said that I won’t let this happen.”

“But … you’re only one person…. And they seem to be .. powerful…”

“Ohhh you don’t have to worry about that- I will protect you.”

“Thank you.” You gently smile at him.

“Now … I have to go. The brat will wake up soon.” He says and gets up, walking towards the door.

“Goodnight y/n.”

He walks outside and you fall down on the bed.

Behind your closed door, Sukuna licks his lips and looks down at the old finger in his hand.

TAGLIST (open): @laceymorganwrites, @nnessworls , @irreverent-dream , @fiona782 , @shadyjinyoung, @kasianthus @hello0i

[neverdoingmuch]

Wait cql lawyer/law school AU

i got you my pal dont worry!!

law school, im gonna be honest and say i know like nothing about law or law school so pls ignore any inconsistencies or inaccuracies

lwj goes to law school and he is definitely the top student in his class. they’ve been there for like a month and everyone already knows he’s gonna be the best

his one and only competition is this dude called wei wuxian but lwj isn’t particularly worried about him

so far they’re still in the stage of the course where they do the fun things to sucker people into doing the class for the semester so there’s been some practise debates and arguments and stuff in their tutorial classes

wei wuxian has that Charisma and like yeah all of his arguments are perfect but also he has an amazing smile and people are like yes i can trust him 

(he’s definitely the sort to be like hm, the easy way to argue this case would be to quote some laws and use precedence to justify this but that’s boring)

lwj is also good at that sort of stuff because his arguments are perfect and everything is so perfectly researched that there should be no ground at all for someone to lodge a counterargument

(wei wuxian manages somehow and it makes lwj so mad)

but that’s whatever lwj thinks,, a lot of people join law thinking it’s gonna be like the tv shows and books and then get completely blindsided when it comes to the rote learning part or like the actual laws 

and for all of wwx’s confidence, lwj hasn’t actually seen wwx so much as touch the textbook/s and he always studies in the law library so he knows that wwx has probably never even been there bc he hasn’t seen him even once (why’s he looking? bc he needs to see which books wwx uses to study,, bc there has to be something going on there,, obviously)

then they do their first like proper written assignment and lwj and wwx tie for the highest scores and now lwj has a Rival and he refuses to lose to someone who thinks that putting a ‘-us’ sound at the end of a word makes it latin (did wwx say habeas corpus and then point at a soft drink and go  sprite-us can-us,,, maybe,,,,)

anyway! lwj and wwx are kinda rivals for the top spot and it’s one of those situations where one test lwj wins by a point but then the next test wwx gets full marks and they just keep exchanging the top spot in class

and this whole time wwx is like The Worst to have in class. he’s always interrupting to ask questions or just straight up not listening and spends the class doodling pictures of rabbits (they’re cute but wwx is terrible and he’s not allowed to make cute drawings)

so after a few months the most horrible thing happens.... they get put together in a project and lwj is like ugh. internally of course but his face is also saying ugh

the first time wwx and lwj get together to work on the project, lwj is prepared with a proper list of tasks to do all nicely split up between the two of them and a schedule for when they should get certain parts done by. 

needless to say, lwj does not expect wwx to be ready, but wwx is definitely on top of things

he rocks up and is like yeah let’s do this, this and this and have them done by this time - basically proposing to do everything that lwj has already written down

and lwj is pleasantly surprised and is like hm maybe i misjudged wwx and decides to like re-evaluate his opinion on him

in doing so he realises that when he’d never seen wwx studying, it wasn’t an exaggeration at all. he’s never seen wwx so much as touch a textbook or spend more than a minute on a laptop doing something that wasn’t minesweeper or solitaire

but wwx is also making all of their deadlines and even adds extra information and resources to their document that could be useful elsewhere and sometimes he shows up to their study sessions and he looks absolutely exhausted

eventually lwj manages to get the truth out and wwx is just like yeah it’s easier to get worse grades than a genius but if you both study and you still get lower grades, it’s not easy,, for jc or for me

so wwx usually studies at night when his brother is asleep and lwj is like that’s bad, you can’t keep that up and just when wwx is about to go off at him lwj is like you can come study at my place

and thus begins the wonderful time where everything is alright and lwj falls in love with wwx

they work really well together and wwx is strangely considerate and nice? when he finds out lwj likes rabbits, he goes out and buys bunny post-it notes for lwj and starts to always bring him a doodle of bunnies every time he comes over. he always gets his work done on time, early even, and his work is always so brilliant and every time wwx smiles at him, lwj feels warm inside etc etc

for a long while lwj is like yes (: this is friendship (: bc he’s never had a crush before but then on the day they submit their project wwx is like hey,, the two of us make a great team,, we should always work together,, now and next year and even when we graduate,, i want to help the innocent people who need our help and i think i’d like it a lot if you joined me and lwj has his oh moment

they get a perfect score on the project of course and even after it finishes, wwx keeps coming over to lwj’s place to study or just hang out and lwj is just falling more and more for wwx each day

they’re best friends now and everyone gets used to seeing them work together on projects and then turn around to try and decimate each other when they’re working one on one and lwj thinks that he might just be the happiest he’s ever been

but then one day wwx doesn’t show up to class. it shouldn’t be strange but wwx has never missed class even once and he ends up hearing from lxc who heard from jgy that wwx was caught sabotaging some other student’s work (the other student was jzxun, who had a fondness for playing devil’s advocate and other than wwx once telling him that his argument was shit, wwx never spoke to him or seemed to know who he was but lwj is a bit too angry to remember that)

he manages to find wwx outside of his dorms as he’s moving out and he’s just like why did you do that? and wwx is like oh y’know,, bc he’s not really sure what’s happening himself,, one second he was at the top of his class and the next he was being brought before a board and being told that he was being expelled but he’s not going to tell lwj that bc lwj would definitely try and stand up for him and then they’d both get expelled

but lwj is furious and just spits out well if our dreams meant so little to you then maybe it’s a good thing you failed now,, bc his mother was a lawyer who took all these little jobs that helped people who actually needed the help and lwj was looking forward to doing that with wwx and he doesn’t even seem to care that now they can’t do that 

wwx flinches and then smiles at him and just cheerily says, that’s me and leaves. he doesn’t look back and lwj doesn’t chase after him.

lwj doesn’t see him again for years (you can do 13 or 5 or however long you feel like)

lwj is a fully licensed lawyer and he’s working for the family company and he spends half of his time working on cases and uses the rest of his time to do like outreach programs where he goes and visits schools and runs sessions on what it’s like to be a lawyer, how to apply, and to provide assistance to any students who decide to study law at uni

and then at one of these programs he meets this kid, wen yuan, who is ridiculously bright and enthusiastic and has a smile that seems oddly familiar

at the end of the second session he comes up to lwj and is like mr. lan, is your name lan wangji? and lwj just says yes, expecting the kid to be a fan of one of his cases or something but then wen yuan is like oh wow! i thought i recognised you from my dad’s photo!

and lwj isn’t expecting much but he asks what the photo looks like and wen yuan pulls out this photo from his pocket and lwj immediately recognises it,, it’s the only photo he has of him and wwx

your father is wei ying? lwj asks him and wen yuan is like yes, hesitates, and then asks, would you like to see him?

and that’s how lwj finds himself following wen yuan to some dinky little office that has a plaque outside that reads wen and wei

(wen ning is the nicest and sweetest person ever and lots of people underestimate him but then he’s an absolute monster on court. he gets up and completely decimates the opponent and then at the end is like (: it was so nice to meet you!! i am baby!! and all that,, you know our boy)

anyway they walk in and wwx turns to greet wen yuan but then he sees lwj and is like woah! you! and he’s not sure whether to hide or go and hug lwj so he just gives him a fist bump,, like a bro,, and immediately wants to shrivel up and die

anyway they get the reunion stuff out of the way, swelling music, tender wrist holding, lots of staring, lwj silently declaring his wholehearted love for wwx and refusing to believe rumours about him again even though he doesn’t actually know what happened, you know how it goes

from wwx’s side of things,, after he got kicked out he went to some small uni. good in its own right but not known for their law program and ended up specialising in family law

the first case he ever won was for the wens to have the right to keep custody of a-yuan and the first case wen ning ever won was to let wwx adopt a-yuan bc i’m soft like that

so wwx has just been kinda vibing,, being a single dad, living with the wens and helping to make that difference he always promised he would

now this isn’t gonna be some au where lwj goes oh my! i must give up my high salary job and work with wwx! bc lwj has been doing good stuff at his current job and for all of his family’s stuffiness, they run a fair and just company 

but! he does end up helping wwx when wwx gets a letter with a bunch of information about the jins and how they’re actually super corrupt and evil (big surprise,,) and how wwx was maybe definitely framed bc he was doing some casual work on the side and stumbled across some bad shit on the jins back in uni

lwj ends up being the one to take the case officially but wwx is definitely the guy leading it and so lwj ends up spending most of his time at the wen-wei office

lwj definitely bonds with wen yuan, who also wants to go into law, and writes him recommendation letters and helps him edit his applications and stuff

(and one day wen yuan is like leaving you was the hardest thing dad ever did and i dont think you appreciated how much he cared about you. he really did think that he annoyed you ‘til the end and lwj is like no! he didn’t! and wen yuan is like yeah i know but you gotta tell him and lwj really does mean to but the time is never right or something like that but also wen yuan is all but calling lwj dad at this point)

anyway they end up going to court, side by side, working as a team just as they promised to do and just as they finish their final day on the case, ended with the jury ruling jgy guilty and wwx’s reputation all but saved, wwx turns around and flings himself at lwj

is he crying? is he laughing? a bit of both tbh but wwx ends up confessing right then and there, still on record and everything (is that how that works??? idk! let’s say it does)

and what can lwj do but make out with him?

did a news crew come in to film the results of this massive court case just to end up with five minutes of wangxian kissing?? maybe! but when it played on tv it meant wwx and lwj didnt have to actually tell anyone they got together

(and does lwj eventually pop the question using wwx’s bad latinification? yes and wwx is too busy laughing to accept at first but he does and they end up being the worst possible tutors for wen yuan as he goes through law school bc they keep being all gross and lovey-dovey and acting like law school is the most romantic place in the world)

[whenfatecollides]

Hi ! I've been getting into Dreamcatcher lately since everyone's been saying if you're a lesbian you're gonna like dreamcatcher, and i do ! i was just wondering from someone who obvs knows them better, do you think they're naturally so close to each other or it could be a bit more... fan service stuff bc I'm always worried about getting into groups who just queerbait all the time, idk how to say this and im not trying to attack DC but there's been a lot of talk abt it in kpop lately

I get where you’re coming from, but with time you’ll see that they’re genuinely close

dc have gone through a lot as a group (some of the members have been together for abt 8/9 years now), specially the ex-minx members (jiu, sua, siyeon, yoohyeon, dami) who had to overcome an unsuccessful debut and decide to stick together despite a rough start. there’s a lot in the member’s own story that makes you wonder if there really isn’t a force in the world out there who brought them together because so much happened, to some members more than others, that literally put them right on the path to become a dreamcatcher member. it just had to be the seven of them. 

for starters, yoohyeon auditioned for a few companies and mbk accepted her. she went the first day and quit that same day because of how she was treated by the staff. she said that from that experience she wanted to quit on the idea of becoming an idol, but she really loved to dance and sing. which led her to meet sua at a dance competition before they auditioned for hfe. sua had been training to become an idol since 2012 and hfe was the one company who accepted her (I can’t imagine sleeping on that much talent). this led them to debut together and even become roomates.

siyeon had a close songwriter friend who introduced her to the company, she auditioned and got in. similarly, jiu’s vocal teacher referred her to the company, she auditioned and got in as well. as for dami she had wanted to become an idol since elementary school, one day she participated in an open audition at her school and hfe called her for an audition.

with gahyeon, she actually went through a few companies before landing on hfe. she was an fnc traineed for a while, she got in both yg and sm, but left since they weren’t going to debut a group any time soon. similar to dami she participated in an open audition at her school and she got called for an audition.

and handong had some interest in kpop when she was in high school, but when she got the chance to go to korea for university her dad made her promise she wouldn’t try to become an idol, it was literally The condition for her to go to korea, she wasn’t meant to audition according to her parents will. but one of her uni teachers told her about hfe’s audition and she just went for it anyway asdkjhs (her relationship with her parents is fine now). it was just meant to be.

they’ve also mentioned quite a few times that they didn’t just instantly click with each other like that (some members having a cold impression of sua at first, siyeon admitting it took her quite some time to get close with handong, jiu saying she was skeptical about the adittion of handong and gahyeon but soon realised they made the group stronger), they worked on their relationship over time and they wanted to make things work with each other which itself is really important and shows the kind of loving and supportive enviroment they wanted to build for each other (I go a little bit more in depth about their overall story in this post). they’ve made sure to build a really great sense of teamwork with each other since the beginning, from the fact that they had about 2/3 months to prepare for dc’s debut (minx still performed on october 2016 and dc debuted january 2017) alone, they really had to make a conscious choice about it all. honestly one of the things that makes me sure that dc are close is that they don’t hide the negative feelings they sometimes have towards each other (which are normal), they've spoken a few times about silly things that they’ve argued about and have even mentioned that they don’t get the other members involved in the quarrels they’re having with another member to not create more drama than necessary. but you can really see that they love and take of each other in the little things too, not just the (sometimes) fanservice. and by this I mean things like, sua calling handong in the middle of her vlive to go get food for her, dami letting yoohyeon sleep in her bed and going to the living room because she didn’t want to wake her up, siyeon falling asleep on top of yoohyeon and yoohyeon not having the heart to wake her up as well, among many many many things.

but truly they’ve gone through a lot of hardships over the years, including having a member be away and unable to participate in comebacks and group schedules for a whole year (not because of health issues or anything like that, but because of the covid situation that made it impossible for her to fly back to korea), and they got out of that situation being even more appreciative of that member when it could’ve easily been something that could have made them turn on each other. it was a situation that brought them even closer and appreciative of one another. they really want to be on this path together.

as for the queerbaiting bit, I’ve made posts about this before and as I’ve said, it doesn’t matter whether or not it’s fanservice because at the end of the day they’re respectful and caring, and they’re only normalising same sex attraction. they never make you feel gross for that attraction either, they’ve never pulled a ‘no home though’ moment, they continuously sing songs directed at female lovers without changing the pronouns, continuously accept marriage proposals from their female fans, and even when a fan was dubious and said “but we’re two girls” jiu said that it didn’t matter and that love is love, and they’ve said many times that it’s okay for female fans to be nervous around them (aka attracted to them). 

and not that it’s anyone’s business but the members themselves have dropped many hints over the years, from not specifying the gender of their ideal type

“Dreamcatcher Handong, “even if they’re not good-looking, a warm-hearted person is my ideal type.” “My idea type, erm... a warm-hearted person. A person not necessarily need to be good-looking, if they’re warm-hearted they’re a good person” ©

-

Handong: For me, firstly, kind. It would be great if the person has a good personality and is tall.

Gahyeon: For me, because I’m still young I don’t have a definite ideal type. Just someone who smiles prettily and is fun. Ah, if the person has a good voice, it will be good. I like to talk on the phone. ©

-

Jiu: I wish to have someone I can chat non-stop with, and who is also knowledgable and has a good character. I’ve never really thought about an ideal date, but what’s most important is that the atmosphere has to be comfortable!

Yoohyeon: My ideal type is someone who’s like Peter Pan, someone fun-loving and positive! My ideal date location would be Paris, France. It’s a really romantic city! Really look forward to spending time there with the one I love.

Gahyeon: I like someone with a beautiful smile, and someone who can really take care of me.   ©

-

to lowkey admitting a same sex crush (she went to an all girls school as far as we know)

to being uh very straightforward about it

among other things 🐒 I’ve been into kpop for quite a lot of years now and I never experienced a group make this as comfortable as they do honestly. that’s why I say that it doesn’t matter if it is just fanservice, they’re still changing things for the better. but that being said, take your time getting to know them~ I think it’s better that you see it for yourself rather than have someone tell you really

[elysianslove]

hi! how have you been since the hell that ensued after halloween is?

also could you do a batboys college au? like their major and how the reader would meet them and all that jazz? 👉👈

-🐥

hi anon!! i’m not sure what ur talking about @ the halloween stuff hvsdhjs but! here are the batboys hc’s! i’m not very familiar with duke thomas’s character enough to write about him tbh, so he’s not included here :( but if you want me to add him let me know!! i hope you enjoy!!

dick grayson

out of all the batboys i really didn’t know how to choose a major for him

but

i think he’d do law tbh, specifically criminal law 

his main motivation to become a police officer in bludhaven had been to be able to help people in any way he can 

i forgot if it’s canon or not but he does realize how corrupt it is and he quits but that’s another thing we won’t get into that lmao 

anyways yes let’s just stick with law 

meeting you ! 

he shares one or two courses with you

one that’s really early in the morning 

and one that’s later on in the afternoon 

dick is like a magnetic okay

anywhere he goes people are just attracted to him

like literally he will breathe 

but someone call the ambulance there’s a person that’s passed out bc of how beautiful he is

but this is an 8 am class 😃

so there’s no way ur awake enough to notice him

coincidentally he sits next to you one time

and this is the one time

you decide

yeah lemme just fkn sleep is uni even worth it 

dick definitely notices right away but he doesn’t say anything 

he thinks you look so cute passed out on your desk like this 🥺

when the professor signals the end of the class, he watches as people file out and then he just leans over and nudges you slightly 

you nearly punch him bc he scared you ❤️

he just laughs and goes “class is over” 

you just sigh like the guilt starts to hit you and your heart begins to sink

and he sees your disappointed face and just goes 

“i took a lot notes. i can share them w you?”

lifesaver in every single way dick grayson 😻😻😻

you had another class that you had to run to and you were rushing

he was like “dw i’ll just give them to you whenever i see you next” 

and you 🏃🏻‍♀️ outta there

imagine ur surprise when u enter class at 12 pm and he’s there in all his glory 

after the lecture is over, he walks up to you as you’re packing and asks if you want to go to the coffee shop nearby 

to take his notes of course

and you finally register just how handsome he is 

so obviously you say yes wtf

and the rest is history 😼

he asks you out, properly, pretty early on tbh 

so unfazed lmfao 

now you take naps on his shoulder instead of the desk 💞💞💞

soooo into pda 

kisses u when he first sees you

when you’re parting ways

when he feels like it

straight up cuddles w during lectures i’m not even joking 

it’s disgusting how cute you two are 

gets you coffee for all those 8 am classes u have w him hehe

study dates always turn into karaoke sessions somehow don’t even ask lmao

jason todd

english literature 

this is a collective agreement right? 

right

definitely english literature 

i dont even think he wants to go to uni but he’s going to waste time plus this is bruce’s money 😏🤑

your major doesn’t necessarily have to be english literature as well

but you share one class

and my god 

you two disagree on everything

like every little thing

at this point if he says something and you slightly agree internally you’ll still say some opposing shit 

that’s kinda what draws you to him 

at first you genuinely had nothing against him

but then this kind of rivalry developed for no specific reason 

but it was fun

and he was hot

so seeing him get flustered or angry made him even hotter somehow 

but then

but t h e n

you’re not sure if your professor like ships you or something

so you’re assigned a debate topic on one of the books you’d discussed in class/one of the books you’ve read outside, and within each group are the two sides for and against 

not only were you in the same team as jason, but you were on the same side as him

so you had to work with him

the audacity of the professor omg 

but jason needs this course 

and 

well you don’t but it’s too late to back out now 

you two meet in the campus library after deciding on a book with the other two of your team

and 

honestly??? 

you two work so well together 

like insanely well

during the debate you destroyed the other team 

spoiler alert 

doing so well with jason kinda made you like hot and bothered 

seeing him in his zone

sexy <3 

what i mean to say is

you both end up making out in some storage room lmfao 

or hate sex 😏

professor has a phd in matchmaking 🤔😻

i think you two don’t admit you like each other

bc you’re both stubborn as fuck

but eventually you’re literally on his lap on his couch and it just hits you

and you lean back and go

“wanna go out w me” 

and he just shrugs and goes “sure” and pulls you in for more kissing hehe

he’s not v good at the boyfriend thing tbh

you have to chase him around and be like “sir!!! did u forget about me huh!!!”

he doesn’t mean to i promise

he gets all blushy and flustered once he realizes 

only ever into pda if he’s insanely jealous 

will straight up make out w u regardless of where u are or who ur with lmfao 

he’s still getting used to the little intimacies and all 

debates in class are so much more fun now cause he finds it so hot when u get all riled up hehe

that eng lit professor is so happy for you two omg

tim drake

okay i also couldn’t really decide for him

but maybe he’d study something like physics (or maybe computer engineering/computer science) 

idk u have to have a death wish to wanna major in physics so tim’s major it is

i’m not sure how it works for every other uni but my uni requires 6 credits of sciences to graduate 

so let’s say for the sake of this hc u take like just the first level of physics to get 3 credits 

and 

you’re struggling 😃👍🏼

so you like approach your professor with a few questions before the quiz 

but tim is also there

and he kinda makes small talk while you two wait outside the office

and he asks why you’re here

you show him

and he’s like “oh i took this course w the same professor as well, i could help?” 

it’s like an angel had descended from the heavens for you personally 

you take his number and decide to meet up with him after a few hours 

he’s of so much more help than your professor would’ve been, even if ur prof is a really nice and smart person 

and he’s super like

patient with you? 

also he pays for all the coffee and snacks you’re getting after you already get them 

ur like bruh i didnt 

dont pay pls

and he’s like no im loaded let me 😼

swooning <3 

and guess what!! 

you ace the quiz out of some miracle

first thing you do is text him and he congratulates you 

and then

bc ur not blind and tim is so fucking cute

you’re like “can i take u out to thank u” 

tim’s brain stops working but ! 

he does say yes eventually 

he becomes your designated physics tutor + your amazing boyfriend

being with tim is so like

chill

it’s a very relaxed time 

lots of study dates! and cafe dates! all hours of the day whether the sun is up or not 

into pda but to a certain degree 

like yes of course have a kiss pretty baby 

but also it will only be a small peck

any time anyone passes by like common rooms you two will be there snuggling on the couch, one or both of you completely passed out 

damian wayne

business major 100% 

or a bsba econ major, which is basically the business side of economics 

he has to take over his father’s company one day duh 

also i genuinely think damian would excel in this field 

he’s a very keeps to himself kinda guy in uni

like you only ever see him in your common classes and then he just

disappears 

anyways there was this party that everyone was going to, and damian wasn’t planning to

but dick accidentally read some groupchat’s messages and was like are u going

damian went 🏃🏻‍♀️

but dick was like go and try to make friends !!!! 

and dames cant say no to his big bro 🥺 so he goes

stays in a corner on the settings app the entire time

like half an hr in he just leaves and is walking home/back to his dorm when you come like rushing up to him 

you’re zooming 

and then you just latch onto his hand and lean up to press a kiss to his cheek, whispering in his ear “this person’s been following me for like 15 mins just please go along w this” 

he kinda stiffens but when he does notice that there’s a person eyeing you he slips his arm around your waist and just carries on walking

he walks you to your home/dorm and is like

so awkward 

but it’s okay ! ur a people’s person enough for the two of you 

you thank him so much over and over 

and then you’re like 

“can i take you out on a real date?” 

and then he becomes ur real boyfriend hehe

is still super stiff but it’s only bc he’s so hyper aware of how attractive you are

and i’m super positive he doesn’t have that much experience with dating so 

you hold the reigns 

but he’s a great boyfriend all in all tbh 

super attentive, super protective, and so loving 

isn’t into pda especially on college campus but he does like subtle pda

things like linking your pinkies or giving you his hoodie to just parade around campus hehe

end note; i’m sorry if these feel rushed or anything like. i used to be an avid writer for the batboys, but i just haven’t been feeling it lately. i still love to write from them bc i know these boys so well eeeeppp. anyways feel free to request some more!!

[hawksky]

JJK Characters as the weird ways me and my friends have found ourselves in relationships

A/N: everyone except me is still in the relationship so lmao... the scenario is one for one exactly what happened to me and my friends, the description is either what happened or embellished to fit the character, length also depends on how much I know of the details djkshd sorry also somewhat funny but mostly cute content, i’ll be back to memeing next time but fuck gege and everything post anime at this point me and the babes need comfy content

ft. Nanami, Geto, Gojo, and Yuji (+ Nobara and Megumi) GN!reader I’m pretty sure (lmk if i missed something)

cw: alcohol 

Literally in the pandemic, matched on ~ small town ~ bumble, the true miracle is you are actually coworkers on different floors (this is the second coworker you matched with, the first one did NOT work out)

Nanami

It’s funny bc Nanami wasn’t even looking for a relationship, his job is hard, relationships are difficult, he just needs to blow off some steam and it’s the pandemic he’s trying to minimize harm, and someone who has the same exposure as him just makes sense (even if it conflicts with his aversion to dating coworkers, at least you’re on different floors)

But I mean c’mon it’s YOU and HIM, you try and pretend it’s casual for a couple dates, but that goes out the window quickly and you text your friends freaking out like “okay wait what am I doing I think I actually really like this guy”

Your work is a pretty gossipy place and for some reason it feels like greys anatomy with everyone dating and sleeping with each other but you guys don’t want that so you try for a really long time to keep it quiet and hidden from your coworkers

Some people eventually find out and you do your best to cover it up but you freak out thinking he’s going to be so mad because of how private he is but he assures you everything is fine, and even if people didn’t believe your cover up everything will be fine

You guys are already friends and have semi overlapping friend groups. You go on trip with your friends for Spring Break, they separately planned a spring break trip with their friends to the same place as you. You guys get some one-on-one time and end up cuddling. You return to uni and start dating.

Geto (unofficially Gojo too because my friend here is more like him)

Geto was really excited for the trip he planned with his roommate, and while on the trip he found out you were going to be there with your friends and I mean all of you guys are friends it only makes sense to hang out for at least some of the time?? let’s pretend he doesn’t have a massive crush on you and isn’t looking to spend more time with you in a really cool place

but then you’re hanging out really late and it doesn’t make sense for you to go back to your airbnb so you guys just decide to watch movies while everyone else is asleep and you end up cuddling and talking all night

Some of his other close friends are so confused at first because he doesn’t tell them anything, you first meet them when you go over to Gojo and Shoko’s apartment to play Mario Party

They looooove you and the shit you give him, they think you guys are so perfect for each other

You guys are involved in the same on campus activity, you start as friends but your conversations that started as regular banter turn to flirty banter very quickly, but it stays like that for a while so you get drunk at a club and impulsively text  “so are we gonna date or nah” and they call you and tell you to come over

Gojo

Look Gojo can flirt. Gojo can be your friend. Gojo doesn’t know what to do with real feelings. So he texts your mutual friends about how cute you are and how unsure he is about actually pursuing things, he’s worried about whether you’d really like him or if he’s good for you 

Your mutual friends are TIRED of seeing it and know how you’re not sure how to feel about him honestly, so they leak his texts

You are on a bender of going out every night for a week for the fun of it (no bad relationship with alcohol here), armed with the confidence of liquor and also the knowledge that he definitely wants you, you drunkenly text him while at a club

He tries calling you multiple times, eventually you go out to the clubs rooftop and he tells you to come over

you cuddle and talk for a while before going to sleep (you make fun of his room)

BONUS: while at the end of the year event for your club you meet and hang out with these two girls who introduce themselves as Shoko and Utahime, you’ve never met them before but upon hearing your name they say excitedly “OH we know who you are, we’ve heard plenty about you”

You meet in a Facebook meme group. Deadass. You long distance date and marry for 2 years before having a wedding as they move to your country.

Yuji

A tinder guy you went on a date with and are kinda friends? with adds you to a meme group, the group is pretty small and has no real discernible theme, it’s really a close group of friends that made a meme group and the membership kept spirally out of people adding their friends

You really enjoy the memes though so you actively comment and post your own even though the vibes are so weird

You and Yuji start replying to each others posts and comments so you end up adding each other on SNAPCHAT

After a couple of weeks of you going on failed tinder dates and snapping Yuji, who you think is super cute, you guys start having skype calls. Which quickly becomes literally every night skype calls falling asleep together, it takes like two weeks before he’s tipsy on skype telling you he loves you

Some of your friends are really skeptical of everything going on, and honestly you lose some friends to lack of support, but your closest friends stand by you and end up becoming really close friends with him as well.

You guys get married to get started on his immigration process, and a year later you have a full wedding to celebrate him moving to your country and have all your loved ones together

Honourable Mentions:

Nobara as a girl you meet on exchange, who is wishy washy for so long about whether you are in relationship or should continue it after the exchange is over. Eventually you start making the plans to come visit and get a work visa.

Megumi as the boy you meet at a party who you think is really cool, you add on facebook and he is really bad at responding quickly, literally takes a full day to respond, but he always responds in very long paragraphs and addresses every part of your message. 

@sandyscastle​ @nokkusu​

[puppy-phum]

get to know me

am going to mix these two different tag games into one post so thank you a lot for tagging me @jazthespazz and @i-am-just-a-kiddo ♥

it’s somehow funny to do these same games again after a while so let’s see what I come up with:

Part I

name: real name petra but i prefer vish/vishie over here ^^ 

pronouns: she/her

star sign: aries ♈

height: 178cm (which am coming more and more proud of while i realize how damn tall every cdrama actor is lol)

time: 10:37pm as am answering this one

birthday: 10th april!

nationality: finnish 

fave bands/groups: ah well this is always a hard question but let’s go with these: BTS, DAY6, OneRepublic, Hurts, Oneus, Hoppipolla, TXT, Red, Mamamoo

fave solo artists: (forgive me if i’ve assumed any of these wrong) Novo Amor, Talos, Crywolf, Liu Yuning, SYML, EDEN, PVRIS, Joker Xue, NF, Halsey, Sleeping At Last, Nuz, HyunA, Sam Smith, Taemin

song stuck in your head: it’s OneRepublic’s Rescue Me bc of the song tag game i did earlier today :’D that one always gets stuck in my head whenever i as much as see the title lol 

last movie you watched: i think it’s The Yin-Yang Master (2021)? I haven’t watched any movies after that bc am so busy with all of my dramas haha

last show you binged: i think binged would be The Journey Across the Night! I watched that as a whole in 4 days

when you created your blog: in 2013 

the last thing you googled: ummm i think it was “what is a ball of wool called” bc of fic purposes haha as a non native speaker i always get a bit lost with words like this 

other blogs: none, i just dump everything here like the idiot i am 

why i chose my url: dates back to my intense summer of binge reading J.R. Ward’s Black Dagger Brotherhood series. Vishous was my favorite of the brothers haha. i first used this username in some random game on my nintendo ds lol 

how many people are you following: 358 which somehow feels like a lot but also like way too few?? i should probably search for some new blogs with other topics than cql, bts and/or dmbj bc i do love a lot of things at once 

how many followers do you have: over 800 

average hours of sleep: i’d say around 7h

lucky numbers: i remember answering 5 previously? i don’t really have a lucky number but 5 pops into my head

instruments: nope, no. not touching those tyvm. i admire everyone who can play any instrument tho

what i’m currently wearing: black jeans, socks with foxes on them (plus my woolly socks), a gray cardigan (my fave thing ever!) and an orange/brown top

dream job: writer would be ideal but that is very faaaaar into the dream zone 

dream trip: around different parts of asia to taste all the amazing food ;; maybe a road trip of sorts through europe? or inter railing? another trip to london bc i miss that ;; a trip to the very northern part of lapland to see all the auroras etc! i’ve never been that far north :’D 

fave food: if i need to quickly name something then sushi. otherwise am pretty fine with anything spicy 

top three fictional universes you’d like to live in: i remember thinking about this a lot the last time i answered this but hmm. currently i’d say dmbj still bc that world is fascinating AND i would love to talk to the characters. mass effect would be the second one currently bc i miss those games and the space stuff is super cool! and the third one would be assassin’s creed rogue bc that is my fave ac game and i like the northern sea and the places in it AND i could probably be one of abstergo’s employees instead and just test/play those simulation games haha 

Part II

Last Song: am currently listening to my playlist with just everything so i have Andrew Belle’s The Enemy playing right now (also I only just now realized that Andrew Belle also sings Pieces which is one of my fave songs? my bff linked that to me after it played in some tv series she was watching)

Last Movie Last Stream: i didn’t want to mention the same movie again or skip this question and i’ve wanted to talk about this anyway so! i watched Liu Chang’s bday live last night :’D it was so much fun even if i couldn’t understand anything. it was just nice to watch him being himself and have fun and chill with his fans. also the songs were amazing ;; i cried with Liu Sang’s character song as well as the ending. and all the while i couldn’t turn my gaze away from his eyes! he has such pretty eyes and they were absolutely Sparkling throughout the whole stream, it was so nice :’)

Currently Reading: Devotions by Mary Oliver (i adore her poems! they’re a very nice change after Siken haha) and then some uni stuff for a course about culture and mental health plus my thesis

Currently Watching: Douluo Continent, Word of Honor, The Long Ballad 

all of these are amazing and make me feel different things! i started Douluo Continent just a while ago and am now on ep 16 i think? it’s been very pretty and very chill and i watch it during the weekend while i wait for new episodes to the other two :’D it’s nice to see Xiao Zhan again and i’ve enjoyed the rpg game type of feeling in it? the group of seven is doing amazing and it’s interesting to watch them craft their team work! Word of Honor again has reached the ending and i just hold my breath with it. am not too far gone with it so i am not getting as heavy feelings about it as i probably could but i enjoy it  alot still and i do cry at times ^^ and then The Long Ballad has just blown me away! i didn’t expect to love it this much and be this invested in it but everything about it has been such a positive surprise and it keeps making me super emotional! i love the characters and the story and the romances even! it’s a great accomplishment for me. also yes i cry on the daily bc of hao du and bc of ashile sun’s hair haha

(i am also rewatching Ultimate Note kind of and been thinking about getting into rewatching Reboot bc it has been on my list ever since i finished it)

What is antipoetry to you: okay hmm i had to google this too and have to agree with Kiddo here. i don’t have strong feelings about poetry tbh, i wasn’t into poetry that much before maybe a bit over year ago? Siken has really blown me away haha. but i have always loved song lyrics which i never thought as poetry but then Kiddo said to me that they consider them poetry and yeah ok. i agree? so idk poetry can be whatever i suppose. i’ve never seen any rules in it anyway. i know there are many rules for different types of poetry but then again. i feel like poetry has always been just words put together to feel things and i guess that is the core purpose of every written type of art in the end right? 

Currently craving: a drama as good and as personal as The Journey Across the Night. that show really just stole my heart and i want that feeling back. i think about that show every day. i miss Li Jia and his two partners. i miss the vibes. i miss sitting on my floor watching it and just sobbing my heart out haha. also! craving a properly subbed, whole version of Anti-Fraud League. only the first 12 eps are badly subbed out there. wetv has... blocked? deleted? the whole show??? i need it to my life, i wanna see Xiao Yuliang being cute as Mi Ruo and i wanna know where the story goes smh 

thank you so much for these both! i had fun ^^ also am sorry this is so long but haha if you’re asking me to talk about myself and my interests then this is what you get :) 

tagging (to do which ever part you want or both!): @cross-d-a @jockvillagersonly @humanlighthouse @kholran @xcziel @minmoyu and @leonzhng ♥

[chucklegigglechortlesnort]

Nekoma getting a manager hcs?

FUCK yeah baby let’s GO

Nekoma Manager Headcanons:

Yamamoto is so excited about this.

Like a whole ass cute manager that they* (*note: he) can brag about and bring to training camps and be protective over?? Hell yes.

Kuroo used to terrify the hell out of you - he’s a tall ass dude with spiky black hair and a villainous smirk. And he’s really hot. All these things chalk up to a very intimidating human being.

But you soon realize that he’s just a huge dork who’s very passionate about volleyball and his team - something you genuinely admire about him.

Tho it was really Inuoka, Lev, and Yaku who made you feel at ease. Inuoka, because he’s an absolute ray of pure golden sunshine. Lev, because he’s a dork and easy to laugh at. And Yaku, because he has hella parental energy and was the person who recommended you apply to be the manager in the first place.

It’s certainly quite the experience being Nekomas a manager.

When you went to your first training camp and we’re suddenly bombarded by Yamamoto part two and his partner in crime, you had absolutely no clue how to react. You just kinda stood there, embarrassed, until Yaku came to your rescue.

But when you met the rest of Karasuno you quickly had a understood why you were so abruptly acknowledged. Shimizu is drop dead gorgeous and Yachi is the most adorable person you’ve ever met. Apparently since Karasuno and Nekomas first match, Karasuno’s manager had been the one thing they had over Nekoma. And then they got another manager and, well, that only added insult to injury.

It took Kenma a while to warm up to you. You at one point thought he just flat out disliked you, but Kuroo crushed that fear almost as soon as it started to bubble up. He just told you to be patient and not to try to hard, and now you’re on pretty familiar terms with Kenma. (you guys bonded over animal crossing and stardew valley, it was later that you discovered his intense love for dead by daylight and super smash bro’s - he has every edition to ever exist on console)

You come to love these boys so much more than you could have imagined you could love a bunch of sweaty, stinky volleyball nerds.

Lev comes to you for flirting advice, to which you have little to no knowledge of, so it often turns into you just giving him wholesome advice on how to make a girl feel comfortable around him. He doesn’t know the difference.

You’re secretly trying to set him up with Akane and Yamamoto doesn’t approve

Yamamoto definitely plays up the over protective Senpai role and will ward off any fuck boys admirers that try to make a move on you. You have a whole team of boys occupying your attention already, the last thing you need is another one getting in the way of your priorities.

Inuoka hangs out with you outside of school the most, which is always entertaining. The both of you have a boba place/cat cafe that you frequent. There’s an old grumpy cat there that for some reason loves Inuoka and won’t let anyone else give him affection.

Kuroo will never admit it to you, mostly because he enjoys teasing you too much, but he admires you just as much as you admire him. Your support has brought up the team’s morale more times than he can remember and he can’t imagine what the team would be like with out you. You two have a very unique bond of shared, unspoken appreciation.

You and Yaku are the team parents. No, Kuroo is not the team dad. You are. Yaku is still the mom.

The team definitely throws you a surprise birthday party. It’s nothing special. Maybe a poorly decorated and barely edible cake followed by a gift card or two. But it’s the thou ght that counts. Just the fact that they decided to spend time out of their day to celebrate your birth with you is enough.

You love going out for ice cream after practice with them, it’s so wholesome and fun to be around them and see them joke around, just guys being doods, doods being bros, ya know? also free ice cream bc senpais pay

Oh did I mention that you really really love them? Because heads up, the seniors are leaving for college- oh wait they’re already gone. And now you’re crying.

Ok but seriously, watching them go was one of the most bittersweet things you had to do?? like ouch, oof, heart brOKe.

You’re the only one crying, but you don’t care. Yaku dragged you into this and now he’s leaving and it isn’t FAIR.

You guys have a little going away get together in the gym where the seniors thank the coach and advisor and all that stuff, but the last thing you were expecting was to get a formal thank you yourself.

They must really wanna see you cry, damn.

You completely lose it though, when Kuroo gives you a separate thanks with a pat on the head and finally tells you how much he appreciates your hard work. It’s a whole waterfall of emotions and you’re honestly not sure why you’re crying anymore but you can’t seem to stop and now you feel awkward

Kuroo is just kinda shocked by this and is gut reaction is to just... hug you??

Kinda unsure but does it anyways

It’s tense at first but soon it starts to feel pretty natural and now he’s just waiting for you to stop crying. Or to pull away. Or both.

You end up keeping in touch with them while they’re in UNI and they come to visit practices now and then.

Kuroo takes too much joy in scaring the baby first years who just joined the team.

Yaku still yells at Lev

Kenma and Lev get along a lot better now than they did the previous year, but Lev still manages to get on Kenma’s nerves pretty often.

If they’re visiting during a practice match Kuroo will give one of his famous speeches to get the team pumped up

They’ve always sounded rediculous to you but you find yourself smiling anyways.

Good? Bad? Yes? No? It’s two am when i’m finishing this so I’m sorry for any spelling mistakes or gramatical errors, but i don’t feel like waiting to post this so i’m posting it now

Requests are still open - two out of ten spots filled :)

- tre

[zhuhongs]

なんか私の想いが溢れ出した. i went out with some friends last night and every time i go out i always realize just how bad i am at communicating and how bad I am with people. (long meandering post under the cut. feel free to ignore its unfocused and long.. like 2k words under there)

I’ve mentioned this before but I don’t really talk much irl. I don’t talk, I can’t connect properly. Every time I’m out with people I just feel fundamentally, like… different. So a group of my irls friends plus me were going to the movie theatre and I personally really hate movie theatres. I knew we were going to one and prepared myself thinking “oh it’ll be fine bc you'll be with friends, just enjoy their company '' But god I really hate movie theaters. It’s been so long, i forgot how much I really really hated them. They’re so loud and bright. I’d much rather watch a movie at home but tbh I also just don’t like movies bc I can’t sit through them and I can’t focus and I don’t get invested easily and I need to be doing something with my hands at all times. To make matters worse, my friend's friend that I really don’t like came along. I just, I don’t like her. She’s just too loud and attention seeking and childish. Like she says things for a reaction, like rlly not okay things sometimes and I just can’t stand her. like we went to see godzilla vs king kong and then entire movie she kept YELLING "IF THEY DONT KISS I WANT MY MONEY BACK" and i was like... you are 21 yrs old oh my god.. this isnt ur tumblr blog in middle school. shut up. But here’s the thing, I don’t know how to tell her or anyone that. Like I just can’t figure out a good way to say it, so I put up with it. Things like this just make me feel incredibly annoyed. I always talk on here about how if I have an issue with anyone, I’ll just say it like an adult. But in face to face situations I just don’t know how to say things. Well I do know how to say it - it’d be easy.  I just hate having to do it. Like I don't have to say the whole thing about how I don’t like her but when she says like “simp” when she’s nonblack I could just be like. “Hey don’t say that, here’s why” and I’m sure she’d stop. Yet I can’t bring myself to have that one moment of discomfort to tell her to stop yelling in my ear or stop saying things that make me annoyed. I feel useless in a way. ちゃんとできない。 ちゃんと伝えない。During the entire movie I was thinking to myself that I’d rather be home watching a drama by myself and doing hw. I also hate going out for other reasons. I hate being seen. I hate my appearance. I know I don’t have to be pretty, I only need to exist for me. Like wow, I just have so many body image issues, and they all manifest heavily as soon as I go out in public. 

But afterwards I changed my mind a bit. There was a moment where we were outside running around in the street and it reminded me of that one scene in AIB episode one with Chota, Karube, and Arisu in the street and I was rlly like… wow… maybe human connection really is good. It doesn’t matter if I’m pretty or good at talking, sometimes, to laugh and be silly wth others is all you need to make your night. Just one moment, just one person really is all it takes. We all went out for dinner afterwards and it was really really fun. I enjoyed it, there really is something about eating with someone that brings you closer to them.  

The entire time though, I didn’t talk much. I don’t really know when to cut in in a conversation to a point where it feels right. I feel like by saying my piece I’m interrupting others just to say something that wasn’t really of any use. Really, I prefer silence with others. I’m bad at talking in social situations but I’m great at talking in classes and at work because of the context. Because I’m expected to engage there. The pretense is different. Like you’re supposed to contribute in those places. It’s acceptable to talk there. But for me, it doesn’t really feel acceptable to just share about myself like that in a social group setting. I wish I could always communicate like how I am doing here. It’s so much nicer online. I get to post my full complete thoughts without bothering any of you. My words can easily be disregarded and just flipped through. It’s passive. Posting is passive, talking is active. And sometimes, people don't really want to talk to others, they just want to say their piece. Like when talking about their problems, often we just want to say it and the act of saying those words is all we need. We don’t want input, it annoys us. I don’t like to cut in, and I can never find the right words to say. Even right now, none of this feels like it’s coming out correctly. None of my words feel like they’re coming out correctly nowadays, but this is the only way I know how to be. If I can’t post my thoughts on here, even if they come out crooked and ugly, I may never speak again. I have to keep talking, and typing, and trying otherwise I’ll never get any better. And I know it’s okay to do things wrong, but still, I can’t let myself do that. Again, I do fine when I’m at work and school. I’m functional, normal, you would never be able to tell how much is going on in my head. But in private, I may never speak again if I wasn’t spoken to. 

When I was younger, around 12 or 13, I remember something a friend posted on my first online community. They posted, quite honestly, that they never wanted to meet anyone on there irl. No matter how close we are, it would never be the same IRL. I didn’t get that sentiment at the time. To me, why wouldn’t you want to see your friends everyday in person? That would be great. But I think I get it now. I’m afraid that if I ever met any of you someday it wouldn’t be the same. I’m not really the same in person. I’m bad at talking, bad at connecting. I’m not a proper person. But I feel like that’s okay. It’s okay to just exist on here as I am. While my friend was talking to me on our drive back to her place (we carpooled) she was telling me about her life. And she was apologizing like “oh I’m sorry I keep talking about myself” but quite honestly I was glad to just be able to listen. At some point my friend kept asking me what was up so I decided maybe I’ll tell them the arcane secrets of how I’ve been into guardian and how all the characters rlly hit for me for personal reasons. That was really the only thing I thought that was of note to tell her about. Really I don’t think I’ve done or felt much new since I last talked to her. But as I was trying to explain I just wasn’t doing it right. She just didn’t get it and trying to talk about something like that just made me embarrassed to the point where I just dropped it and tried to just say, “oh yea, you got it, that’s it.” and move along bc I didn’t think she’d get it. She’s the type that doesn’t really get how you can make meaningful connections online. So whenever I try to talk to her about certain things, it just doesn’t register. I’ve learned to choose my battles. I didn’t really think she wanted to get it. So I didn’t tell her. I tried telling her about stuff I liked in the past and I just always stop halfway through. I can’t communicate properly. I can’t speak in a way that I think is worthy of being heard. So I don’t talk. It frustrates me to no end. It feels like everyone else can do it so easily, that I’m the wrong one. 

I had another friend from Uni message me about something and she was like “so what’s new with you, twin” (we have similar bdays and get along well so we call each other that) and tbh I just, didn’t know what to tell her. I had talked to her in a long time, so things had happened but nothing so easily said that I could just tell her over text. SO I just was like “work, school, yk how it is” and yea. I really am the one choosing not to let people in. It frustrates me to no end but I don’t know what a good starting point is ever. I feel like I should just send all my IRLS my long reflection essays next time they wanna know what's up. All the secrets to why I am the way I am are in there.

I’m scared of telling people how I feel about anything. IRL when I say something I often speak quietly, moreso like I’m only talking to myself. People often don’t hear what I had to say. And I don’t repeat myself. If it was something someone didn’t hear, in my head, that means that it wasn’t important enough to repeat. I’m afraid of talking and being misunderstood and never being able to be interpreted the way I mean. I want to convey all my thoughts correctly the first time. So i don’t repeat myself, not bc I’m mad at the person who didn’t hear me. It’s not about them, it’s about me. I don’t believe my words to be worth repeating. I don’t want anyone to stop the conversation for me. Just keep going, it won’t come out the right way anyways. I was taking a uquiz a week or so ago and one question was “what power do you want” and one option was smth like the power of comprehension. Which would make it so every time you spoke, that person would understand you the way you intended. That is the most ideal power for me to ever possess like it was unreal. I’m still thinking about that quiz. It was good.

I know that I’m worth being listened to and that my words are valuable enough to be heard but I don’t want to do that. I’d rather listen. I only like talking when it’s safe like it is here. I’m trying my best to get better though. I keep saying that I want to be a proper adult. I want to live right and without regrets and i really think communication is key to that. I’m trying. It’s hard but I’m trying. But still, I can only talk here a lot.  I can’t talk any other way. I don’t tell my friends about my interests, it embarasses me to no end. 

Being on here is comforting though. When I talk about stuff like this, I always see a lot more people than usual like my post. I feel like you can all relate. Really, people are more similar than not. We all have very similar burdens and pains and baggage. It’s comforting, I'm not alone. My words might be able to help someone. Because when all of you talk about the same things, i also feel seen and comforted and since we are so similar, then the same is true for the things I say.

But anyways, I did a lot of listening tonight, and it reflects the sentiment above. People are the same. I was listening to my friend’s friend talking about her mom earlier and the entire time, I really resonated with what she was saying. I got it. Her mom’s situation was really similar to my own mom’s situation in the past. And I was just amazed at how I barely knew this girl but I felt really similar to her. I saw her differently after learning all that. It was really a great thing. ANd on the way home, my friend was telling me about her life recently and some things andi really understand what she was going through. I didn’t say anything, because again, I don't like to interrupt. And when I try and be like ‘oh me too, it's the same for me too” I feel like I’m derailing. I know I’m not but I really think she needed to say her piece. So I let her. But the entire time, I thought about the things in my life that were the same as what she was feeling and it was beautiful. Life and human bonds are beautiful. Even when they are hard and messy and annoying, people all want the same things. They want to be loved and seen and understood. And in those moments when we feel seen, it’s worth more than any of those complicated feelings that come along with it. Not to be cheesy but wow… in order to reap the rewards of being loved, you really do need to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known. I was glad I didn’t stay home watching a drama. I was glad that I went out. No matter how alienated I feel from others, there’s still merit in being around other people. No matter how much others may misunderstand you and annoy you, they are almost always worth more than being alone. That;s because deep down, we’re all the same.

I’m not good at reminding myself that. As I said here, I don’t let people see me. I don’t let people in, I’d rather keep them out. I’m a picky, boring person. I don’t like people easily and I don’t tell them much. I stay inside my own head and I don’t like to come out. I was raised that way. But people are worth it. Communication is worth it, no matter how hard. It’s all worth it. I need to try harder so I can be a person who is able to see and enjoy more beauty in this world. I spent my hr long drive home listening to music and ruminating on these thoughts, trying to plan out all the words I wanted to say here. I don’t think I said any of it right. I’m not satisfied with how I write nowadays. But writing, talking, conveying emotions, all of these things are worth doing. So no matter how crooked and awkward it comes out, I will keep doing it. It is my goal. 

[collectivefandomstuff]

Hey mom! I’m stressed at 1am, any advice? I’m having trouble in school via studying sometimes it feels like we’re going from 0 to 100. And I need better study habits, do you have any advice? Bc sometimes it feels like I’m so afraid of failure that if I do study to my full potential (sounds weird) I feel like I loose the excuse of saying oh I got a bad score bc I goofed off. Like if I actually do all my effort to study and do bad, then is there something wrong with me??

(A/N: this answer is so long I almost feel ashamed to post it. I’m very sorry everyone. Anyway, if you’re looking for the concrete tips they’re at the end :) )

Hey :)

This doesn’t sound weird at all because I’m the exact same way. This way of thinking is actually more common than you’d think, and is often a part of the cognitive profile of perfectionism (btw, perfectionism isn’t that apt a name but I digress. Also, this way of thinking doesn’t mean you’re a perfectionist.). Anyway, I know a bunch of people who’ve experienced this, and the common factor isn’t fear of failure, but rather what it is you think you’re failing at. For example, I once told my therapist that I was super stressed over a bunch of stuff and I also had a paper I had to get done, and he asked me what would happen if I didn’t turn it in on time and I was like “academically? nothing. mentally? I wouldn’t be me anymore.” And that’s the stitch.

The people I know who struggle with this are often (though not exclusively) girls, and often people who’re pretty smart. They spent their childhood being told over and over that they were gifted, intelligent, and good at school. And back then, that was easy to live up to. They danced through the first few years of school without any issue, and enjoyed it a lot. They did their homework, understood stuff, and were usually “good kids”.

Now, we’re always growing and re-shaping our sense of self, but the foundations are lain when we’re children. So, when people around you keep identifying you as a smart/good student, then we start identifying ourselves like that too. Especially if it is being reinforced by your actual achievements. And then, suddenly, getting good grades isn’t about doing well or working hard, it’s about identity. It’s about who you are at your core. Thus, the stakes become infinitely higher. If you fail at a math test that you really studied for, then that means that you don’t have what it takes, and that means you are no longer yourself- the intelligent kid who’s good at school. A test might not be that anxiety-inducing, but losing your whole sense of self is. So, in that case procastination makes a lot of sense, because as long as you don’t fail while doing your best then you never put your identity on the line.

(This also applies if failing at school has become synonymous with being a failure, i.e. if you’ve been taught that doing well academically is the only way to be a successful/useful person in society, or if academic success has merged with the idea of a happy future so it feels like failing autmatically leads to an unhappy life. Essentially, mental structures that lead to a misconception of the stakes involved in a single exam/paper/task.)

That said, I do have some more practical things to say here. First off, sometimes we’re in a situation where we can’t do our best and that’s okay. I’ve failed exams, tests, papers, you name it and I still have my degree in the end. It’s never the end all of things.

Now, my own biggest freak out like this came when I started uni. My first paper I went completely insane and procrastinated like crazy, and I failed. And then the though crept in “what if I can’t do this? What if this is it. I can’t handle higher education, even if I try my hardest?” The anxiety was... big bad and mad.

I should say for this next part that my therapist once told me that I have a strangely aggressive approach to handling anxiety. Moving on. I sat down and said to myself “what is worse, to try my hardest and fail or half-ass it and never be able to live the life I want?” Since the answer was pretty obvious, I got to it. I had about 5 weeks until the next exam, and I sat down and planned every single hour until then. I studied for that damn test like I’ve never studied before, and whenever I felt anxious I would tell it to FUCK OFF and focus on the task I had planned. I didn’t allow myself to think beyond that first planning session, I just did what was next on the agenda. What am I supposed to do right now? read these 10 pages? Ok.

I’ve had two exams during my studies where I failed (the second due to the situation I was in) and ended up in this spiral. And here’s the funny thing: I have a small number of courses in uni where I got a higher grade. They include 1) courses that I found extremly interesting and 2) those two courses.

Okay! I know this is already so fucking long but I want to give you some actual tips too. Number one is obviously to plan. Take a whole day, sit down and plan the next month. Consider all your assignments, when they’re due, what you need to do to study, how long that’ll take and when that is done most efficiently. Plan everything in your calendar. Give yourself enough time for each task that you can do it even if you’re not super super focused. Do not study outside these hours. When you’re done for the day you’re done for the day. This way, there’s a clear, reachable end to each study session and you don’t feel as compelled to postpone tasks. When you sit down to study, don’t worry about the other stuff you have to do, or other subjects that you haven’t done yet. They’re all in the plan, all you have to do is what is in front of you. As long as you keep doing that you’ll make it. (If the plan goes to shit for some reason, take a day to plan a make a new one. It happens).

Some things to consider:

Different subjects are best studied in different ways. I used to set aside 15-30 minutes every day in high school for Italian, where I’d sit down and read the chapter we were working on out loud. I didn’t even focus that hard, I just did it every day- the chapter and the glossary. I STILL remember some sentences from that book. Math is best done in longer stretches, but not too long. 1-2 hours preferably. Think about how YOU work. Do you best read a textbook in one go or in increments? Do you learn better in a coffee-shop or your room? Silence? Music? This can also change depending on your subject. Plan accordingly.

For reading, time your reading speed for the book. Read a page at normal speed and clock it, then multiply that by the pages you need to read to see how much time you’ll have to plan for. Round up to give yourself room for spacing out.

Plan for breaks. Think about your normal need for it, but the uni standard is 15 minutes for every 45, making an even hour. Find a break activity that’s has a specific end, for example making some more tea/coffee and snacks and doing some stretches, or maybe playing one race in mario kart. Avoid things that you can get stuck doing beyond the alotted break time.

Buffers. For every five hours or so, plan one hour of buffer time. This is time that you can use if something takes longer than expected. If you do everything as planned, this is surprise free time! :D If you have a long study session, plan 30 minute buffers every two or three hours to be used for extra breaks and to keep panic at bay. Buffers will save your life.

Make a chart with different tasks and have little boxes that you get to fill in with fun colours when you’re done. If you have to read 100 pages, do a bar with ten boxes, that way you can see your progress visually.

Plan for days/evenings that are free. Plan what you’re going to do those days, like “movie night with X”, “play videogames and eat cupcakes”, “take a long bath and read a good book”. That way, you use your free time well and can use those days and evenings as incentive.

Prioritize your work. If you have too much to do, make a list of what’s most to least important and focus on doing the important stuff first. This includes studying tasks. What’s more important, reading that text for the third time or really understanding integrals?

Drink lots of water and eat sugar. It’s brain food. I usually bake before an intense week. That way when I feel myself going down I can go get a cupcake instead of taking time to make something to eat, or worse- try to soldier through which never works.

I hope this helped a little at least :) Good Luck! I believe in you! 💙💜

[dawniebb]

Face reveal bc yes

So, guys...especially from the Renegades fandom bc i’m the most active there: you saw the title lmao. This will...barely get notes (i wonder if it’ll get notes at all) buuUUUT YEAH LET’S GOOOO (If you’re gonna reblog pls be respectful bc i have issues and btw reblog ONLY if we are mutuals)

THIS IS ME! <3 HELLOOOO!!!

Now, if you want to stop here, do it. If you don’t...well

I’m going to tell you a story about myself and why I decided to post this.

First of all, I’m not celebrating anything. I’m just celebrating me, I guess (?) and in fact I’ve been wanting to do this since my parents got me a She-Ra cake for my 20th birthday back in May, because I loved that thing and felt the physical need to shove that thing into everyone’s faces But I didn’t because I didn’t feel ready enough...then that thought left my mind, and it came back like two weeks ago.

I’ve had mental issues since I was in like...elementary school. I’m sure I had felt depressed before I turned 12; however, the first memory I hold of feeling so, it’s when I was already 12. Because it was then when I realized that I wasn’t just a dumb kid who didn’t know how to make friends xd To this day, I genuinely feel like I was suffering from isolation bullying; you know xd my classmates purposely excluded me from activities, they would find any excuse for not letting me join their work teams and stuff like that; during my last year at elementary school, I only had like one friend, and that one friend and I shared a sort of abusive/toxic relationship, as in: manipulation, “we’re best friends. you should only talk to ME”, and then this friend turned her back at me too, because she decided to join the rest of the group and ignore me.

lol.

And I remember wondering what was I doing wrong. Like, why didn’t people like me; why didn’t they want to hang out with me; why did everyone seem to have friends except me. And then I got trapped into a very...dark place, and I remember being overthinking one day, because I tend to overthink a lot...and I remembered this specific kid who was in the same class as me.

I was in the line for the teacher to check my homework, and this kid, a boy, was behind me.

You see. I’ve always been chubby xd I don’t think I’ve ever been skinny since I was 2 years old or so, because by the time I was in kindergarten my classmates’ moms were already calling me a ‘little meatball’ thinking it was a fucking adorable nickname because Mexican moms can be pretty shitty sometimes don’t let the media stereotypes fool you not all of them are all cheerful and upbeat and when I was in elementary school, for some reason, besides being chubby, I had a really bad posture. And this boy who was behind me started imitating my way of walking and his friends were laughing, so I turned around and asked him wtf his problem was xd and he turned around to his friends and asked “Do you see how hunchback she is?” like I wasn’t even there xd and I genuinely tried to slap him but I couldn’t, and he said “Yo, stop moving because you’re going to cause an earthquake”

And my mom has always felt personally attacked for the fact I’m...u know, fat. She has always been very insistent on the fact I need to lose weight and stuff like that. And her, mixed with my experiences at school, made me feel like I wasn’t enough.

But my mind started saying things like “And u know why you aren’t enough? Because you’re fat”

Because, like, the day of the hunchback insult, when I told the teacher, who was a very shitty teacher btw but i’m not talking about her again today (i’ve already talked about her in MANY of my university papers, because I’m studying to be an English teacher), she turned around at him and said “Don’t listen to HER” and to this day I still don’t know why xd

But it made me feel like I wasn’t enough. Because I was fat.

Lol x2.

To this day, I still don’t know if I have an ED. Like, I genuinely don’t know. But I can safely say that, if I have one, it’s more likely BED... because, through the years, I managed to lose weight when I turned like 15 and I had my quinceañera party, but then first year of high school came and I had a relapse into depression...like, this might come off as a very unpopular opinion, but junior high school was dope for me x’d I remember it as one of the best years in my life, right after my second and third year in high school (high school in Mexico lasts only three years) and so...when I started my first year in high school and got fucking depressed again, I gained ALL that weight back, and even doubled it. During my second year of high school, I met my friends. The friends I still keep with me to this day. And they accepted me like the fucking train wreck I was, failing math like three times in a row and crying about it every single one of those times  because I’m pretty sure I have dyscalculia but my parents won’t listen to me they think i’m just lazy when it comes to math even though they know i cant even read a fucking clock . And them, along with my another very close friend who I met via fanfction when I was 12, helped me go through it. Like, I did have some issues with my body during high school, but not as much as you would expect. They were getting pretty bad in my first and second semester, but during the other four my friends managed to stop me from losing my mind, even when it all went to shit in my third year again for different reasons.

Then I graduated from high school, and I made friends there too. Although my best friends are still my friend from fanfiction, my friends from high school and just one of my university friends. And you know...I was left...pretty scarred from the shit that happened during third year of high school, and even if I didn’t feel like I was *that* depressed, I did gain a lot of weight.

Like, the highest I’ve ever been. Then my dad got sick during October from last year, then my two doggies were murdered god i fucking hate my neighbors the same day my dad was released from the hospital and my mom went kinda nuts during December and I wanted to just...yeah.

So I did a lot of emotional eating. Like, y’all don’t understand.

It was like...I would go to uni and eat a brownie. Then chocolates on my way home. THEN a “a snack” like...fucking rice krispies. Then a huge ass meal, with soda bc why not. Then I would have either cookies or hot cheetos as a treat after my huge ass meal,

I’m a short person xd carrying that much weight was making my ribs and back hurt, as well as my legs and feet; my breathing was freaking awful, and there were some days were I got SO paranoid I just said things like “i’m gonna die today” or “out here trying to get diabetes like the rest of your family, aren’t you??” :’) but i didn’t tell anybody. My parents are not really an option in this case, BUT I didn’t tell my friends, because then I would have to explain that I ate a lot and that was something I was EXTREMELY ashamed of.

When February came, I was scared of going out, because I knew I would have to choose what clothes to wear and nothing fit me anymore and, the things that did, looked super stretched on me and, u know, I was sore. My health was getting bad. But I didn’t like to feel that way.

AND I MUST CLARIFY HERE. I’M WORKING ON THAT. I’M ACTUALLY A BODY POSITIVY DEFENDER, I JUST DIDN’T LIKE HOW *I* LOOKED AND, BESIDES, I WAS GETTING SICK. I GENUINELY THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE AT SOME POINT. I’M NOT SAYING BEING FAT OR CHUBBY IS DISGUSTING. NO. I BELIEVE ALL HUMAN BEINGS ARE EXTREMELY BEAUTIFUL. AND IF I’M WRITING THIS IS BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO KNOW RECOVERY IS DISGUSTING AND DIFFICULT SOMETIMES AND THAT IF YOU’RE GOING THROUGH SOMETHING LIKE THAT: I’M SORRY. NOBODY SHOULD EVER FEEL LIKE THAT. I SUPPORT YOU. AND I HOPE THINGS GET BETTER. AND NO MATTER WHAT OTHERS SAY, YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE TO CHANGE ONLY IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE. BECAUSE IT’S YOUR BODY. KEEP HOLDING ON.

But going back to the story...

My friends used to tell me I looked pretty all the time, which I appreciate a lot to this day. But my parents were like

Me: I’m fat and I look deformed.

Them: I agree.

Because yeah.

Just before the pandemic madness happened, I went on a school trip with my uni friends and one of them triggered my isolation trauma in the worst way possible...and that, somehow, ruined ALL the photos I took throughout the trip. Because I wasn’t enough. Because I was deformed and fat and I looked like an apple. Because nobody wanted to be seen near me. And my personality was shitty.

Like, I should’ve known I was worth it. I’m still worth it and I know that. But I wasn’t less worth it when I was chubbier. And maybe I didn’t look as bad as my head made me believe. But at the time my mental health was extremely awful.

Now, covid happened.

Not gonna lie. Quarantine fucked me up as much as it fucked everyone else, but for me...by not going out, I stopped being near trigger foods, and I was even able to consult a dietitian.

I’ve lost 15 kg since March. And I’ve managed to love my past self, but I love this one because changing it was my decision. Sure, my parents didn’t help a lot, but in the end it was MY decision. I’ve come to accept I was worth it even when I felt disgusted by myself, and all of those awful things people said or did to me, like my friend during that trip...

I didn’t deserve any of those things. Because NO ONE deserves to be treated that way.  No one deserves somebody else making fun of them. No one deserves somebody else doing awful things to them that they know damn well that they trigger their childhood trauma. No one deserves to be judged for the way they look.

I was in a very dark place, and sometimes I’m still inside there. And like...during all those times, I kept posting in here.

I remember being next to my dad in the hospital, telling him “Guess what? Supernova drops this week” or “We’re going to watch TDP together, right?” or “Let me talk to you about She-Ra...” ....those were things that like...saved my life for a while, though mostly Supernova. Because, actually, Marissa Meyer has helped me in my fucking darkest years x’d from my third year of high school until now.

Her books didn’t take my depression away, but they did make things a little lighter for me, even when I felt like dying.

And I know this fandom is like..full of minors, so...I don’t know if any of you need to hear this: But you’re worth it.

If you want to change anything in your body, do it because YOU want to.

Because YOU’LL like you better.

Because it’s YOUR body, and it’s the only part of yourself that you and other people can touch.

Nobody should ever tell you you’re worthless because of your weight and your physical appearance. And if they ever do, then they’re the ones who should apologize, not you.

Nobody has the right to mistreat you, abuse you, or use your own body against you.

As for me...my ribs don’t hurt anymore. Nor does my back or my feet, and my breathing is getting better; I took the conscious decision to lose weight but, like I said, now that I’m not in such a dark place, I’m staring to realize that the past me wasn’t as hideous as my mind was making me believe. She was okay; she was broken inside, but she didn’t deserve anything that happened to her, nor did she deserved to treat herself that badly.

I posted my photo just to celebrate that I can finally said I’m not disgusted anymore. I can finally see myself in pictures again. And see my own reflection. Or go through my closet. Or do my makeup, because I LOVE doing my makeup and I was even ashamed of that. I’m not fully okay yet, but I’m healing.

So, if there’s any little Dawnie around here: I hope you give yourself a chance and realize you’re beautiful.

I hope that, if you change, it’s because you wanted to do it.

I hope you know that it’ll get better even if the healing process it’s not that easy.

I hope you know there’s people who love you.

I hope you know that you are beautiful. You were always beautiful and, no matter what path you choose, you’ll always be beautiful.

And worth it.

And human.

And important.

Take care of yourself, because you’re wonderful, no matter your size <3

[colour-outside-the-liness]

First of all!! Loved the MoU fic update! left you a comment on AO3 and all. 10/10 ratings haha.

Secondly, moving countries is great you should try if you ever get a chance. I've always wanted to do that and jumped in on the first opportunity I got to make that dream come true, and I recgozine how lucky I am to be able to do so. It's definitely not easy but I'd do it again if I could (in true sag fashion 😎 haha). Where would you want to live? You ever been outside the UK?

Hahaha you and I in a team would be a nightmare to play against I think. Oh come on you absolutely do not deserve people questioning your intelligence! I like to play dumb in addition to the taunting so people underestimate me, they never see it coming when I win. They never see the cheating coming either, my friends are always shocked when they find out, but I do it almost every single time! 😂 I'm competitive too but I like to play it cool especially If I lose I'll be like "it's just a game calm down yall" but if I win I'm like "in your face losers!" (very mature I know).

I love your drunken story, though does sound like it was very dangerous so I'm glad nothing bad happened to you two! Ah I love yalls nordern accent (me and everyone in this fandom 😂) haha your friend's sense of humor is golden.👌 I'm glad you enjoyed my worst drunken experience, that was the last time I did something like that, I felt bad bc my best friend had to take care of me the whole night and you're right she should've told me it was just a rock! Lucky you you didn't get a hangover the day after, I certainly regretted drinking too much that night however fun it might have been haha.

Like I said before your niece is a really cool kid haha I'm glad you have someone to talk to about Bly Manor, don't know anyone who watches the show and my friends don't like scary stuff so I have to talk to myself about it 😂 and now you! Thank you for entertaining me ;) and I only watch the parts I really like now, I'm tired of crying every time I watch the whole show haha.

Do you do random accents really badly like Dani too? 😂 it is kinda funny your mom said it like that yeah hahaha maybe she just meant the good bits? And I mean, do you think you need help? Lol

I have a sneak peek of that damie fanart here, don't think I'll ever finish it tho. I want to do a medieval AU inspired fanart. Maybe it will also inspire someone to pick up the idea and write it haha.

How's your weekend been so far? My neighbor is making me watch Grey's Anatomy season (???) 500 idk but I wish I was reading that pirate AU instead 😂

Awwh thank you so much!! I will get around to replying to the comment on AO3 tomorrow when I reply to the others I've had a very busy day today though so haven't even had chance to read any comments yet but thank you so much for giving it a 10/10!! I wanna do it as soon as I get chance but I know it's gonna be hard and that I am gonna need a bit more money behind me first but I definitely wanna do it when I can... yeah I've been out of the UK twice- one time I went to France for the weekend when I was doing my A Levels and was like 17 the college I was studying at took some of the art kids and since I was doing a photography A Level I got to go and then a couple of years ago I went to LA for a few weeks which was great but I've never been out of the UK for longer than that!! A nightmare for everyone else but it would be hilarious for us I just know it would haha... I sometimes do I have said some dumb things, I actually used one of my dumber moments as a funny little story in one of my fics- people still laugh at me now for what I said and it's been 10 years... my roommate will not let me live it down!! See surprising people that way is always brilliant like when people just expect you to lose and then you win? That's the best kind of win in my eyes!! I don't cheat at games I am just ridiculously competitive and can't stand losing unless it's something like a video game I am okay with losing those but board games I can't stand losing and I am also a terrible winner my roommate won't play games with me anymore!! I can't say anything about anyone being that kind of a winner because I know I am and one of my sister's is terrible too we literally make a song and dance over winning Oh it was so dangerous and we were so dumb to do it like anything could've happened and we both sit and look back at that and go "man we were dumb" but I also sit and go "oh my god she's gonna be a mum in like 4 months" because we've done some crazy / stupid stuff!! My roommate is without a doubt one of the funniest people I have ever met and she's not afraid to tell it how it is... I'll admit because I have a Northern accent Jamie is like the only character on Bly Manor to not have an accent to me so when I hear people talking about her accent I'm always a little like "what?" Because to me that's just how people talk around here haha I did enjoy your drunken story and honestly we've all been there I have had to be taken care of on more than one occasion for being too drunk like to the point of people having to help me into my pyjamas and everything I've been in some bad ways haha!! She should've definitely told you it was just a rock and not a turtle!! Yeah I've only had one hangover and that was after a night of drinking where I blacked out and don't remember any of the night!! Yeah the night of the drinking is always fun- the hangover isn't though and often makes you wonder if it was worth it haha She's so cool like genuinely just a cool and funny kid and she just asks all the questions about shows she's watched so with me its Bly Manor with her mum and dad it's Stranger Things she asked me about it once but I had to tell her I'd never watched it she didn't seem impressed but yeah I'll talk to her about Bly Manor any day of the week- and you too now honestly I will talk about it to anyone that will listen... I can't not watch it all if I watch it because there's just so much about it that I love even if it makes me cry... episodes 4,6, and 8 are my favourites though and are probably the ones I have watched the most!! Yeah I do random accents all the time and they're always terrible but I always find myself really funny- I had this friend at Uni that had a slight southern English accent because he had spent most of his childhood there before moving up north and he still said certain words in a southern accent and I used to do his accent all the time but it was always terrible!! Oh yeah my mum is pretty blunt with stuff like she'll say things sometimes without thinking about how it sounds that or she just doesn't care like she's said

somethings haha I am sure she did mean the Dani thing in a nice way though because she said she liked her- Dani and Owen were her favourites and I mean some help for me wouldn't be a terrible thing I'll admit haha That fan art is incredible!! Like seriously amazing!! I would love to see some medieval fan art for Damie!! I have been sent a few medieval prompts for Damie and I have started writing some of them but it's taking time to actually get full chapters together but once I have and once I have more time from wrapping up other WIPs I'll make a start on editing and uploading those because medieval stuff is always great!! It's been good thank so far today I went to a little beach town with my mum, 2 of my sisters their partners and two of my nieces (my cool niece was one of them… not that my other niece isn’t cool but you know what I mean) and me, my two brother in laws, and my nieces all played a game of crazy golf while my mum and sisters went to a cafe and had cups of tea... they didn't wanna play with us but we still had fun while we played (I came second which I was very happy with)!! I hope you enjoy Grey's Anatomy and that you get chance to read the pirate AU soon!! It's soo good!! ☺️

[sunatooru]

hellooo this is an emergency request pour moi pls. i really appreciate all the emergency requests you do btw, idk how you deal w all that stress AHAHA but um ig i just kinda want some comfort and highkey just validation. i tried to get my dad to stop treating me like a kid bc i’m 21 years old but it’s like whenever i tell my parents my emotions they just mock me for it and then when i say i don’t like that they tell me i’m being too sensitive and it sucks. my mum was on the phone w one of my aunties and my aunty says she still sees me as a cute little kid and i mean idk what to reply to that so i didn’t and it wasn’t bc i was upset, i just didn’t know what to reply yk. and then my mum told her that i don’t like being treated as a kid anymore clearly making fun of me like that has NO correlation to what she just said but anyways. ig i can understand it bc i was more of an adult at 19 pre covid than i am at 21 rn bc i’m unemployed and nearly done w my degree and idk what to do in the future. i can just, i’ve always felt like i don’t open up anymore and i can feel myself closing off more and more. i don’t think i’d ever open up about my feelings honestly bc they’re never validated, by parents or even my friends sometimes so yeah. LMFAOO this is just a vent at this point. i changed my mind about writing, i can’t even imagine a haikyuu character comforting me w/o me reading it and being skeptical. i’m just talking to you now, and idk if you wanna give me advice or comfort or even a similar life experience but that’s up to you babes. have a nice day/night and thanks for reading this word vomit lmfaoo

Hi lovely, I’m glad that you could get your emotions out here knowing that it’s harder to do irl. You can come here to vent whenever you want ☺️ This got kinda long but I wanted to cover everything so I added a readmore xx

I 100% understand what you mean and although it’s annoying, I know parents will always see their children as kids. I think them disregarding your wanting to be treated as an adult (which you are) is a little disheartening but I think it’s because they have probably seen you everyday. Like you won’t notice changes in a person unless you haven’t seen them for a while, so maybe that’s why they’re treating you the same as always. But them mocking you coming out and telling them how you feel is not nice. And if you try again with the same results then it’s an issue your parents need to fix. So don’t waste your energy on what you don’t have control over. Also if your friends aren’t understanding or comforting you then you should ask why. Because if you’re starting to close up then your friends should be more concerned and try to at least distract you with something fun.

And I’ve also found myself closing up more because it’s hard to explain pain sometimes but one day we’ll both be able to open up more 💕

Regarding life after your degree. I promise you, almost everyone is wary about their future. Especially with COVID making it harder for us young people to secure even a part time job. Also, it’s not necessary to know what you want to do in the future. Everyone thinks there’s a certain path to follow but really just follow your heart. And just because you don’t know now, doesn’t mean you’ll never know what to do. I think just focus on ending on a good grade and then in summer you can think about employment? Like there are many ways you could try to earn cash. If you’re good at DIY or like making stuff then you could sell them online. It’s going to be summer holidays and many parents work, if you like kids and are good with them you could check if anyone needs babysitters. Also, this might be good for when terms starts again, but tutoring is a good option. But do try looking for some summer temps or part time jobs so you have some independent income and also be out of the house more often. Don’t be demotivated if you can’t get a job!! Volunteering is always great just so you can feel like you’re doing something good and productive.

Oh and if your psychology department at your uni are recruiting participants then do it! They might compensate you (I once got £30 for 2.5hrs, which is great imo) so if there’s any experiments still running you might be able to grab some cash. Open a saving account too and check bank offers where you can get money for switching accounts!

If you change your mind and want some writing, let me know because they would never invalidate your feelings and mean every word they say to you. I hope I haven’t gone overboard but just remember it’s going to be okay and life gets better!!

Thank you and I hope you have a great day/night too 🤗❤️

[wincore]

hiii moonnn !! for the kiss prompt , may I request johnny pls 🥺 place: under the stars & love as the reason ! tysm this is an honour bc u’re one of my fave nct writers 😙💖

thank u darling for enjoying my writing!!

theme: boyfriend!au, demigod!au (greek mythology)

“So…are you gonna tell me why you brought me up here or…?”

“Do I need a reason?” Johnny grins at you, chin resting on his forearms atop the roof of his car.

“I can’t help but think you’re up to something,“ you state, narrowing your eyes at him from the other side. 

Johnny lets out a short chuckle before closing the door of the car and motioning for you to follow. When your boyfriend said he’s taking you on an adventure, you quite literally had no clue what to expect. Everything’s an adventure to the man—even if it’s just going out at 3 a.m. to get hot ramen from the convenience store right beside your apartment. You didn’t think it’d be an hour drive, dozing off on Johnny’s shoulder by the time you reached.

You take two steps after him before you gasp.

“Don’t tell me we’re meeting your dad!” 

The blood drains from your face at the idea. A God among Gods—you wish that were an understatement—is unlikely to meet mere human beings on a whim, lesser beings as one of the other demigod children had labeled bitterly. He’s a God, feared and admired since times of war and prayers. So what gives you, a mortal, enough confidence to face someone as divine, as powerful? It makes you uneasy.

You shake out of your trance to find Johnny laughing, doubled over.

“We’re not really meeting him but- you’re that scared of my dad?” he says, calming down from his fit. “Even I’m not that terrified of him, babe.”

“Shut up,” you say, cheeks coloring. “It’s not exactly everyday I meet someone who can smite me out of existence.”

“Relax! He’s pretty easy-going,” your boyfriend reassures you, taking hold of your hand. “Besides, he likes hanging out at the beach. And he’s got, like, a bajillion other kids to worry about.”

You rub your thumb over his knuckles, a sigh leaving your lips.

“He can’t be that bad,” you mumble, feeling somewhat sorry.

“Oh,” Johnny says with a dismissive tone, “Pretty sure he’s won worst dad of the year several times, actually. Only beaten by Zeus himself.”

You want to laugh but you stiffen. 

“Are you allowed to say his name like that?!” You lower your voice, eyes shifting around nervously.

“If Zeus could hear everyone saying his name, he’d be, uh, hearing some delicate words pretty often.” Johnny shrugs. “And then we’d have more thunderstorms.“ 

You laugh, easing, Johnny’s eyes lighting up at the sound. They always make you feel warm in the chest, with how pretty those almond eyes are. He tugs at your hand, and you follow him up a beaten road before diverging into a less visible track.

It’s a long walk uphill, however, and Johnny has it easy when his legs are so fucking long. The wind gets chilly and you cling onto Johnny’s hand for a little piece of warmth. A break would be nice. You stop halfway through, swearing at your boyfriend for choosing such a godforsaken place but continue nonetheless when he frowns, a look in his eyes you don’t want to upset. 

Johnny doesn’t let go of your hand the entire time. He’s been this way since you started dating, perhaps even before—a little protective with the need to feel your touch at all times. It’s understandable and you found it endearing despite how often he refuses to let go. (And his strength and stature make it next to impossible to break free.)

It wasn’t hard to tell there was something off about your boyfriend; maybe not the first or second time you met him, but eventually, it was clear. You met in university after all, and it’s not the full uni experience unless all your secrets are laid bare by the end of first year. 

Johnny was a natural people person, everyone drawn to him like he was made of honey, of things so sweet. But there was something about him, oh it nagged you day and night, a silvery whisper. The way he spoke, the way he smiled—there was a quiet difference you just couldn’t put your finger on. He’s aced every athletics club entrance test for fun, a little awkward at reading his text material and always hanging around the swimming pool for too long—gosh, were the number of people ogling him extraordinarily high then. There were so many hints and you’d missed all of them. 

You’ve met demigods before, just not one like this. Johnny was almost unworldly were it not for his habit of making everyone feel at ease. It took you a while to figure out.

Son of Poseidon, gentle eyes and sun-crinkles—how could you miss it? The way he smells of golden amber and sea musk, calloused hands and deep eyes, just all of him, really. It was hard to not find him attractive. But it was harder to answer if that was all. 

The place gets closer—you know because you can see a soft smile forming on Johnny’s face. You quicken your pace to match his footsteps, curiosity peaking as you notice your boyfriend get giddier.

The water glows a gentle blue, in contrast with the darker shade of its surroundings. They reflect the stars, their shine not dulled through the distance and a certain twinkling you haven’t seen in them in quite a while. Water lilies bloom bright, small frogs jumping in and out of the water. There might be some fish too but they’re elusive, invisible if you try too hard to spot them. 

It’s a clear sky tonight. You sigh at the warmth, quite possibly a result of the habitation around here but you’re glad it soothes the cool air. (”You like this kind of thing, don’t you?” “Hm, yeah.”)

“You will not believe how I had to impress the Naiads to find this place,“ Johnny tells you, walking closer to the spring to stand beside you.

You furrow your eyebrows at him, the implication of his words not quite what you expected. “Impress, huh?”

“No- babe, that’s not- I mean, of course not,“ Johnny looks at you with mock hurt.

“Naiads do love a son of Poseidon,“ you mumble, turning away to face the waters. 

Johnny wraps his arms around you, resting his chin atop your head. “Oh, but this son of Poseidon only loves you.”

“Johnny, that’s cheesy,” you say looking down, the heat quite rushed to your cheeks. You want to call him an idiot but the word falls short.

“But you’re enjoying it,” he hums.

“I enjoy everything about you.”

You feel Johnny shake with soft laughter, swaying gently at his own pace. You don’t know when you started to see Johnny in most everything—in the new dog cafes, in midnight city rains, in children playing volleyball. Call it love, call it more.

You turn around. “I—”

Johnny presses his mouth against yours in a kiss that makes you melt and you clutch the fabric of his hoodie for support. His arms wind around your waist, secure as always and he hums when you push against him. 

“Baby’s getting bolder, hm?” he murmurs between kisses with a laugh. You respond with a weak sound.

You remember the first time you kissed him, not quite sober and he had pushed you away only to spend the night with you. The whiskey still burns on your tongue sometimes. 

You don’t need to see fireworks when you kiss, just taste the late night coffee and a bit of Johnny. 

A son of a God and his lips, tongue, fingers, love—the texts and scribes were nothing close to describing it perfectly. You forget the words you meant to tell him.

But you don’t have to say ‘I love you’; it’s there in your mouth and he can taste it.

//

“No, I don’t wanna listen to the minotaur story again!” Johnny shakes you by the shoulders. “It’s literally the worst thing I’ve ever heard.”

“But why? I think it’s funny—”

“Yeah, Dad’s very creative but…gross.”

You laugh at his disgust, nose wrinkled and a mild shaking of his head. 

“Tell me another story,” he says, leaning in, “Something more…romantic.”

You breathe out quickly at the sudden proximity, heart in your throat. His smile grows and you resist the urge to huff at him. He’s unbearable when he knows he’s under your skin. Gods, it was harder to admit you fell in love with him than it was to find out his heritage.

You reach out and move the hair out of his face, marveling at how he manages to keep it soft when he used to be a sweaty college student pretty often. Memories are funny in a way, they keep you so closely tied. There’s an embarrassing amount of pictures of him on your phone, the ones he sent from the dorms, from his new job, sometimes family photos during holidays. It gets busy a lot, but sometimes, just sometimes, it’s like this. 

You wonder if Gods get to have happy endings. You wonder if there’s more to the constellations they made.

“Hello?” Johnny pretends to knock on your forehead.

“Something more romantic, hm? Okay,” you say and he goes back to laying his head on your lap, twirling the water in wisps around his fingers to spell random words. You bend to press a kiss to his forehead, a surprised smile wavering onto his face as the water splashes beside you.

“Baby, you might want to have aimed lower.” Johnny winks at you.

“You’re so annoying. I’m in love with you.”