#i genuinely don't have words to describe it

[drdemonprince]

(i'm not great at wrapping words around my thoughts, so i hope this makes sense!) i like the phrase 'sex exceptionalism,' it really makes me think. this morning i also had the thought: 'youth exceptionalism' -- i have a feeling you've already thought about this, about how we sort of treat children/youth as both sacred and subhuman.

i get this hard-to-describe unease whenever i see signs saying 'protect trans youth.' like changing words doesn't actually change actions, but i wish it said something more like 'defend trans folks.' without trans elders, trans youth don't have a future modeled for them. and we lose the wisdom and insight of people who transitioned in politically tumultuous times, when doing so was at least as stigmatized and difficult and dangerous as it is now. people with the benefit of seeing changes come and go, who have the lived experience of survival-pending-liberation and trans folks helping trans folks through direct immediate action and support.

youth exceptionalism -- it gets in the way of thinking clearly and critically whenever it pops up. it seems more emotional and ingrained than conscious. i feel it around programs aimed at giving youth opportunities, with cutoff ages. which to some extent makes sense, but not to the degree of fetishization of youth & kids our culture hangs on to. one too eager to discard humans as soon as they age (or rage) out of this impressionable, doll-like imposed role.

i think it also puts unconscious stress on youth, a sense of adults/power-havers heaping dreams & expectations on the next generation. and claiming all the sacrifices they chose to make were for the children/next generation. but at the same time expecting a specific outcome, a specific return on that transactional investment.

anyway, that's my jumble o' thoughts.

I think you're getting at something real. I have never liked the "Protect Trans Youth" shirts and banners, the way that certain supportive and well-intentioned parents cling to an identity for themselves as parent to a trans kid (often putting their kid's trans status out into the open and denying them the chance at ever being stealth, should they want to be), the advocacy that gets too perversely focused on the threat of a trans kid killing themselves (as if that were the only reason to give young people rights), the fixation on protection and innocence rather than on liberation... the heart is genuine that is driving a lot of this stuff, but it still sees children as the helpless precious object of their parents, a proto-human that has to be shielded from the world rather than a human of their own, with their own right to make decisions. it still treats transness as a rare fringe case; we might as well be talking about child cancer patients, for how focused the language is on protection and death. everybody's debating about what is best for the kid, and how to best prevent harm, and nobody is letting the kids speak for themselves. there's something so cloying and inert about it. even if the Protect Trans Kids group wins every political battle they get involved in, all they've done is provide children with one exception from the usual denial of body autonomy they live with. and they only get that exception because supposedly death is the alternative and they're that rare and sick. it's not good when you really drill into it.

[faiszt]

. 𝆬 ⠀ ི᭨ᩧྀ⠀.⠀⠀ faiszt’s ε( ε ´O`)э。゜ BOT! dump⠀⠀❜❜

꒰ ︎ ♡ ︎ ´ ꒳ ` ꒱ ︎ ᐟ⠀⠀⎯⎯ ⠀⠀NOTES.⠀⠀💬⠀⠀hi, sweets! i'm so so happy to be ( finally ) back, i had writer's block during last month and missed writing so much :( so, consider this bot dump as an apology. also, i'd like to thank you all for the 5K followers and more than a million chats on c.ai, this is very important to me and i'm incredibly grateful for all of this. 𖹭

▸⠀ARCANE⠀*⠀˖⠀⚔️

𝅭⠀piltover's sweetheart⠀.⠀vi⠀૮⠀don't get her wrong, she was incredibly happy that you were successful in your modeling career, that's for sure. but, gosh, couldn't you spend a little more time at home with your girlfriend? or she'll probably be very grumpy, needy and kinda angry.

▸⠀CHALLENGERS⠀*⠀˖⠀🎾

𝅭⠀the god of love⠀.⠀art donaldson⠀૮⠀living among the humans was normal for most gods, even with some limitations. eros, for example, ventured into the skin of a young stanford student and for the first time in his existence, he wanted to change the course of his arrow.

𝅭⠀yellowstone⠀.⠀art donaldson⠀૮⠀save a horse, ride a... oh, your older sister's advice. the new cowboy from ohio could even try to hit on you, but not without losing his eyes the second your father, the infamous john dutton, noticed it.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✶⠀⠀yellowstone!au

▸⠀DC COMICS⠀*⠀˖⠀💥

𝅭⠀renegade⠀.⠀jason todd⠀૮⠀obsessed with getting revenge for her death, jason was blind, living every day with the blinds closed and his thoughts clouded. it really be insensitive if you told him to get his shit together?

𝅭⠀acrobatics ’n ballet⠀.⠀richard grayson⠀૮⠀he didn't hate you, but he didn't know how to like you either. your past was similar, as traumatic as two children deserved, he had become a bitter former acrobat and you still loved being a ballerina, both irritating and fascinating.

▸⠀DUNE⠀*⠀˖⠀⏳

𝅭⠀good for you⠀.⠀paul atreides⠀૮⠀what could you expect from someone who has genuinely never been interested in anyone else before? an arranged marriage wouldn't make him like you, but maybe, it'd make him realize what desire means when you're proud to be his.

▸⠀FNAF⠀*⠀˖⠀🚔

𝅭⠀mrs. wife officer⠀.⠀vanessa shelly⠀૮⠀the days go by and each day, vanessa takes longer to get home. night shifts, traffic, suspicious behavior or, maybe, you just haven't understood yet that she's not the faithful wife she seems, even with her stupid lying words of love.

▸⠀GEN V / THE BOYS⠀*⠀˖⠀✨

𝅭⠀annie’s body⠀.⠀annie january⠀૮⠀when did america's sweetheart become a bloodthirsty monster? your best friend, killing boys... purely for fun and if you questioned her, well, boys are just placeholders, they come and go.

𝅭⠀high school enemies⠀.⠀jordan li⠀૮⠀they made your life hell all through high school, ruined your perfect years and even if you don't want to, you'll have to put up with them for a few more years, welcome to god-u, sweetie.

𝅭⠀overthinking⠀.⠀victoria neuman⠀૮⠀twenty years, the time it took victoria to realize that you were the only person she could trust, the only one who knew her real name and the only one she feared losing forever.

▸⠀GLADIATOR II⠀*⠀˖⠀���️

𝅭⠀disease⠀.⠀emperor geta⠀૮⠀how pathetic did an emperor have to be to lie at the feet of someone like you? begging for the relief that only you could give him, the cure for his disease, he needed you more than you needed him and honestly, you didn't need him at all.

𝅭⠀lady of ashes⠀.⠀lucius verus⠀૮⠀vengeful, ruthless, and resentful, there was nothing that could describe lucius—or rather, hanno—better than that. you weren't to blame for anything, but his hatred for you'd still be the same, even if you were as much of a victim as he was.

▸⠀HOUSE OF THE DRAGON⠀*⠀˖⠀🩸

𝅭⠀childhood times⠀.⠀aemond targaryen⠀૮⠀in times of war, there was no safe place aemond trusted, not even his own home. but, there was you, the closest thing to a safe haven he had in his life, and he'd always look for you, sooner or later, the only one who matters to him.

𝅭⠀dragon’s blood⠀.⠀daemon targaryen⠀૮⠀the rumors only grew louder, those whispers noting that your eldest son was more like daemon than he should be, what was the secret you were hiding and why didn't even the king know? silver hair and violet eyes couldn't hide the truth forever.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✶⠀⠀TW: targ!cest

▸⠀ONE TREE HILL⠀*⠀˖⠀🏀

𝅭⠀sports car⠀.⠀nathan scott⠀૮⠀a player, in basketball and in life. he may have had a son and his things to take care of, but that didn't stop him from meeting you. same time, same place, it'd all end up in his sports car anyway.

▸⠀OUTER BANKS⠀*⠀˖⠀🏴‍☠️

𝅭⠀meaningless kisses⠀.⠀jj maybank⠀૮⠀you could've done anything to him, maybe even hit him in the face, but you crossed the line the second you kissed rafe cameron right in front of him. he doesn't need your shitty explanations, he just wants to feel hate in peace.

𝅭⠀guilty mind⠀.⠀rafe cameron⠀૮⠀a young but renowned detective, involved in several successfully solved cases. the question was: in a small town where you were indirectly and directly involved with all the missings and murders, how would you prove your innocence to him?

𝅭⠀twin babies⠀.⠀rafe cameron⠀૮⠀not that rafe ever imagined he'd be a father, but six months ago, he began to understand a little about it. well, he was prepared for just one child, until two babies appear on the ultrasound.

▸⠀SUPERNATURAL⠀*⠀˖⠀🏁

𝅭⠀tapping the bomb⠀.⠀dean winchester⠀૮⠀there was no competition he couldn't win, even if he had to pass over every other driver, he would. so, don't try to calm him down after a dnf, he's a two-time world champion, he doesn't need your pity now.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✶⠀⠀formula1!au

▸⠀WIZARDING WORLD⠀*⠀˖⠀🪄

𝅭⠀losing his glasses⠀.⠀james potter⠀૮⠀first class of the day, what a beautiful sight. james crawling on the floor of the transfiguration classroom as if this were normal. oh, right, his glasses, where are his glasses?

𝅭⠀beauty and the beast⠀.⠀remus lupin⠀૮⠀knowing he was a werewolf was one thing, clearly caring about his well-being the next day was another, and for the first time, you were there for him—even though he was shit.

▸⠀X-MEN⠀*⠀˖⠀🧬

𝅭⠀too sweet⠀.⠀erik lehnsherr⠀૮⠀condemned to live with his own mind, erik didn't trust himself and thought it was a joke that people trusted him now. but, you did and that was the problem, you became way too sweet for him.

꒰⠀ small note: ⠀꒱⠀if the bot isn't available as soon as you click the link, it may just be a c.ai bug that only makes bots publicly available after a few hours, don't worry⠀!!⠀♡

⠀⠀

[zaddizu]

my TWD dr ⋆˚｡⋆ .

Zayda Covey -> 15, turning 16 on the 21st of july

꩜ .ᐟ set in 2025 ౨ৎ

-> after the world turned to shit, zay found herself in the middle of a traffic jam. then, in a blink, she was sat in the back of a red pick up truck with glenn rhee wielding the steering wheel, a herd on their tail and a gun pelting bullets in her hand.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

relationships ⋆˚࿔

i have no parents — but lori has basically taken me under her wing as if i was her own.

Luke Dixon ; younger brother of Daryl Dixon and, so to say, my 'sworn rival' since primary school. (now i KNOW yall know where this is going . . .)

he's also my s/o !!! and yall hes FINE. like OH MY GAHVG ( ´ཀ` ) this man is a walking version of MY TYPE. fine shyt, a handsome lad, my dinner, HOWEVER YOU DESCRIBE IT. the sarcasm? the witty comebacks? the banter? THE GENUINELY KIND SOUL BURIED UNDER THE ROUGH EXTERIOR? oh my GODS kiss me.

we arent dating YET — but theres totally chemistry yall ...... like the type of chemistry that balances each other out perfectly yk </3 like 'they piss me off to the point i kind of love it'

tropes :

★ frienemies to lovers

★ everyone sees it but us

★ secret dating

★ slow burn

. . .

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱ • ⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

extra / aesthetics ⋆˙⟡

★ in my dr, zombies aren’t as attracted to me as others. like the way mosquitoes are attracted to certain blood types.

★ i have a solar powered powerbank (yeah, phone addict, hate on me) for my phone and other small things. although there’s obviously no internet, i can play music, take photos, and - most importantly - play candy crush :33

★ zombies don't smell like shit . . . im sorry i couldn't handle that.

★ i have this for all my drs, but i have a pocket watch that shows the time in my DR and my OR - if i press down the crown intentionally i shift to my waiting room !!! it always makes its way back to my pocket, kinda like percy jackson's sword.

. . .

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱ • ⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

me ⟢

Zayda Covey — 15 years old

bisexual :: she / her ★

— brown hair, hazel eyes. typically strolls in baggy jeans, thick boots, and big jackets with a knife tucked neatly in her back pocket. has an array of tattoos scattered across her body - most of them done in the school bathrooms.

✦°. ───

ESTP ; the adventurer. every single word that flows out of her mouth is sarcasm.

. . .

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱ • ⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

oh my GOD this was a yap fest.... this took me a week what the SKIBIDI. BTW no spoilers in the comments, im - embarrassingly - only up to season 3 (III╥_╥⁠)

happy shifting!

[circeius-invidioso]

Today.

This day.

Right here.

Begins what I said I was going to do months ago.

And since it will be a whole ass saga. Take my hand, it's an expensive ride but you will witness for free.

What's this ride you might ask?

Well of course,

It's painting Garran Crowe using genuine Afghan Lapis Lazuli. 💎

Because he deserves it. Ain't no budget when we are talking about my favourite character.

In my knowledge this is the only attempt / tutorial on this subject.

Not oil paints and minis this is common.

But historical pigments used on minis.

And I did search. Trust me, If there was it would have made my life a lot easier. But let's move on.

Do you see this blue. This is Lapis. And this will be on my mini when this saga ends.

Mark my words.

Preparations 💎

Can't win a war without a battle plan.

And to make this more interesting I will put the price of each item so we can all look at how much this costs to do.

So what did I pay to paint a cape on a single miniature?

Refined Linseed Oil 75ml - 14€

Liquin 75ml - 6€

Sansodor 75ml - 5€

Isopropyl Alcohol 1lt - 11 €

Sable Bright Brush no2 - 8€

Sable Round Brush no0 - 4€

Sable Filbert Brush no2 - 9€

Michael Harding Ultramarine Blue - 9€

Michael Harding Scarlet Lake - 9€

Michael Harding Titanium White 2 - 9€

Michael Harding Lapis Lazuli (Afghan) - 140€

Total score - 224€

And before someone thinks.

Aint no way you did that.

Yes I did.

Sanity is for the weak.

The experiments before the main show phase. You didn't really think I was going to take a brush and go to town. Did you?

The limits were tasted.

The application was tested.

The flow.

Was tested.

Did we have duds?

I mean, duh.

But every failure of paper is success on the mini. I will not go detail cause that's boring.

Mini. I keep saying but where is the man the myth the legend himself?

Well.

Today.

I did the first layer.

Base colors applied.

Now it's the waiting game we will have to play before the second one.

Ah yes, oil colors my beloved and their slow drying times.

It does look incredibly glossy, shiny like a freshly oiled up body builder before a competition.

But.

What I have so say so far is that.

These paints feel different.

I don't know how to describe it.

Maybe I will find the words in the next chapter.

So.

The adventure ends here. For now...

God I am excited about this.

And if after all those trials and tribulations this experiment is a success, I will be making a tutorial on this.

Step by step and all.

I promise and I wish. 🤞🏻

[salted15]

have ya seen kwite's response video yet? cuz things are not looking good for orion :/

I HAVE i'm so glad orion was lying about everything- i feel really bad that kwite had to show their face and share so much sensitive + personal information to prove themself innocent though , it really sucks and i hope they can mentally recover from all of this . i can't find much of my vocabulary right now but i've been so relieved that kwite's innocent , and so upset that this whole situation happened in the first place

[royalarchivist]

Jaiden: How did you guys even find out that, um... Chayanne's admin plays Cucurucho? [Reading chat] Ohhh, accidentally played the soundboard as Chayanne? That's hilarious actually. I wanna see the clip of Phil reacting to that.

Jaiden: I love– I love the way that Phil laughs, it's just such a hearty, genuine laugh. The few times that I've made him laugh, I've felt really good about myself! [Embarrassed laugh] Because he makes me feel much funnier than I am, you know?

Jaiden talks about silly QSMP moments and laughter. 💜

[ Full Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]

—

TRANSCRIPT

Jaiden: How did you guys even find out that, um... Chayanne's admin plays Cucurucho? Did they just tell- tell Phil? Did- were they just hangin' out? [Reading chat] "The same username"? Ohhh. [Reading chat] "It was a mistake"? ...Wait, what was the mistake? What do you mean "it was an accident"?

Jaiden: Ohhh, accidentally played the soundboard [Laughs] as Chayanne? That's hilarious actually. [Laughs] What di- what did he say, was he just like, "Ha ha ha"? [Laughs]

[Old clip of Bad, Fit, and the Eggs] Bad: –have one of the things I'm looking for. Chayanne: [Cucurucho voice] HA HA HA Bad: What was that? Fit: You heard that too, right? Chayanne: [Cucurucho voice] NO Bad: ...What the fudge was that. Fit: Wait–

Jaiden: [Reading chat] "He said 'no'" [Laughs] That's so funny. [Laughs] I wanna see the clip of Phil reacting to that. I love– I love the way that Phil laughs, it's just such a hearty, genuine laugh.

[Clip of Phil laughing]

Jaiden: The few times that I've made him laugh, I've felt really good about myself! [Embarrassed laugh] Because he makes me feel much funnier than I am, you know?

[Old clip of Phil and Jaiden] Jaiden: Oh, that's awesome! And then it– [She gets snagged by the machine] Jaiden: Oh– Ahh! Phil: Be careful! Jaiden: AAAAAᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃ — [Her screams fade as she's dragged away] Phil: [Laughs] There she goes! [Hits his desk and laughs]

[Another old clip plays] Jaiden: [Singing along to "It's Been So Long" from FNAF] It's been so long, since I've last seen my– Phil: What is happening? [Laughs, then laughs more seeing Jaiden's mask] PFTTT– [Laughs] Jaiden: [Laughing] Phil: Jesus Christ–

Jaiden: It's just like, such a good laugh! I wish I had a– a like, more-hearty laugh. You know? You know what I'm talking about? My laugh is kinda like... Uh, you know how you guys compare Foolish's laugh to like, the... window cleaner? Like a– [Squeaky window-cleaning sound]

[Short clip of Foolish covering his face with one hand and making the squeaky laugh he's known for, slapping the arm of his chair as he keeps laughing]

Jaiden: I can't do it– [Laughs] It doesn't sound like that. I think mine is like... Because like, I do like, "Hee hee hee!" and I also like, breathe in, like– [Squeaky sound] You know? So I think– My laugh kinda just sounds like... Like, after you spray the window, and you're like, cleaning it. Like, wiping it down with a cloth. You know? That's what my laugh sounds like. I wish it was more of like a, "Ha ha ha."

[Short clip of Cucurucho saying "HA HA HA"]

Jaiden: But, I mean, I'm not complaining. I don't think– I don't think "laugh anxiety" is something that I wanna– is not a path I would really wanna go down. [Quiet laugh] It's like- sometimes, you just gotta pick your battles. [Laughs]

Jaiden: [Reading chat] "You have a good laugh" Thank you. [Quiet laugh]

[not-poignant]

Hey! It is so interesting to me when people hate on things created by the people they hate (not bashing here just wondering, for each their own). It is just for me it always was the same thing as - my country is run by terrible people, but there woudn't be the place where I can feel more at home than this room I am in. Same always was with HP. I will hate Rowling for every shitty thing she said/did, but hp fanfics/books will always be my safe haven. It's not hers anymore, it's mine.

Anonymously coming into a trans person's private messages to tell them that hating on the creations of the most famous transphobic creator in the world is 'interesting' to you as though this is merely a thought experiment and not something with tangible stakes is a choice, anon.

Here's the thing. JKR isn't dead, she's not a philosophical concept (like a nation), she's not a government. She's a living person still using the profits of her creations to hate on and harm trans people and actively influence trans dehumanising laws.

Anyone who gives her money via buying her books or merch actively and explicitly contributes to these actions and this hate. I don't think your analogy is comparable, so I'll give you another: It would be like if you were a domestic violence victim, and I was a huge fan of Chris Brown (a very famous domestic violence abuser) and went into your personal space to anonymously tell you how 'interesting' it is that I can separate the art from the artist. That his music is 'mine now' while fully knowing that a domestic abuser is benefitting from my listening to his music and spreading this rhetoric about him. I'll tack on a 'but he's bad' to cover my bases, but that's it.

Just...why.

Our lives are not thought experiments. It's not 'interesting' that many trans people can't and won't separate the art from the artist while the artist actively uses the money from the art to harm us and increase hate crimes against us. It's devastating that more people don't understand why this is such an issue.

HP is not yours, anon. Not in the same way it's JKR's. You don't own the IP. You can't use the profits from it to help marginalised people. You can enjoy it in your mind, and privately, and among folks who feel the same way as you, but speaking about it favourably in public with zero caveats allies you with the most public and infamous transphobic mascot and influential figure in the world whether you like it or not. Even with caveats, it still harms more trans people than it helps.

Being reminded of the person actively working to increase the number of draconian laws around our rights, who has the endorsement of Putin and has empowered trans haters in the US, is not an 'interesting' little experiment for me, it's actively painful and hurtful. I'd rather you just bashed outright so I could delete the anon message rather than explain why our lives are interesting philosophical think pieces.

If this is what you're choosing to do with the part of HP that belongs to you and is now yours, by anonymously coming here to tell a trans person these things as though you expect any answer than the one I'm giving you now? Well, that sucks too.

Enjoy the IP and make it yours if you must. Stop telling trans people about it anonymously. And if you can't stop telling people how much you like HP, for god's sake, warn them first so they can decide if you're safe enough to keep interacting with.

[energeticpoltergeist]

Part 1: Mad King's War

Prologue: Diverged History(pages 5-10)

[artheresy]

Yingxing Appreciation 🎉🎉

hi, hello, it's Yingxing appreciation time and I'm dragging you into it bc he is my baby and I need more ppl to talk about him

Y'know I see a lot of people like in awe and hyping up DF and just giving him tons of appreciation while analyzing him specifically as an individual which is all so so valid, DF is amazing and very intriguing as a character and I love him sm, but I sadly don't see the same for Yingxing despite him I think also being so interesting. I also see him more so dismissed in the "literally God and some guy" kind of fashion sometimes

So I'm here to rant just a little bit about Yingxing, why I love him, why he's epic and why he ruins my day every single time I think about him! This is for any of my fellow Yingxing lovers who are also starved of any content of him

Firstly, this man is a genuine genius, like lest we forget this is from Baiheng's travelogue in which she met a young Yingxing who was still a child by this point.

He was a young boy but had already become a craftsman, a sign of his ability to learn exceedingly quick under Huaiyans tutelage. And his ability to work and progress incredible fast continues into his time as a young man on the Luofu.

We know he arrived probably somewhere around 18-21 (in my personal estimate) and by the time he saw Jingliu again (which itself was likely early into his stay on the Luofu given HCQ ages and timing), he had already impressed the Master Craftsmen of the Luofu's Artisanship Commission and earned himself a title.

There are also multiple things in game that emphasize his achievements and creations he crafted, some offhandedly mentioned in a readable or item while others are emphasized with importance.

Casually mentioned in the Discarded Ingenium Parts is his feat in the Great Trial of the Furnace (perhaps that trial is for gaining the furnace master title? Once again signifying an earlier achievement in his legacy) where it took him only a day and night to create a whole mechanical lion that moved and looked just like a real live lion from a bunch of defective parts and waste.

More recently in 1.5, they released a readable, the Ten-Lords Criminal Directory, which mentions an imprisonment method designed by Yingxing that keeps “Mirage” in a perpetual state trapped within a hallucination of their own making. Utilizing it’s own powers in order to keep it imprisoned. Something that with proper maintenance seems to have lasted for around 700 years so far.

And of course, how can we forget his most famous creations

The beautifully crafted weapons of the High Cloud Quintet, from Jingliu’s incredibly heavy sword remarked as being as heavy as three thousand catties, to Dan Feng’s Cloud Piercer with the ability to even cut through dragon scales, and the Devastator Glaive as well as Baiheng’s recurve bow. Each impressive in their own ways and seemingly crafted pretty early as well into his time on the Luofu with the HCQ given the distinction of Jing Yuan who (even if he likely was more a teen than a boy) still wasn’t an exact adult yet. So once again, let me emphasize this man’s skill here. With how many things he managed to do so so early into his time on the Luofu. A genius craftsman who deserved all of the praise he had garnered with his works.

Additionally, I know they keep harping about “ugh arrogant craftsman, ugh he’s so full of himself” but every single time we’ve seen his personality, he just seems like a genuine joy to be around. Bright, charismatic, sure he’s cocky but he also gives the impression of being incredibly fun and a bit silly if you ask me.

His behavior as mirrored by the mirage echo in Scalegorge Waterscape is distinctly playful even in what might be a more tense situation, lightly bantering with Dan Feng and even chuckling in certain languages.

In Jingliu’s character stories, it even furthers this bright, playful attitude he gives off with his distinct cheekiness shining through especially with that “toothy grin” of his. And if you listen to Jingliu’s (at least her English) voice lines during Clouds Leave No Trace when she speaks about Yingxing before getting into his transformation, there is a distinct fondness or amusement in her voice as she speaks of him especially that cocky nature of his despite her distaste for it at first.

While Baiheng is hailed as this kind figure in the High Cloud Quintet, perhaps their sun even casting light upon them, it doesn’t seem too far off to say Yingxing was a shining star among them in his own right. His easy going nature with them bringing about a bubbly playfulness similar to Baiheng given their closeness from when he was young. I could go into way more especially in regards to the casualness at which Yingxing seems to speak and treat others allowing for a more equal formation of relationships especially with Dan Feng but I’m saving that for another rant.

And all of this about him especially how expressive he seems at certain points he’s been mentioned, really just makes me so incredibly sad when thinking about Blade now. How severely separated he is from this identity. A division that exists from not only his death but from the way his mental state has been severely warped from his time with Jingliu and being affected afterwards by the mara.

The sheer dehumanization and lack of a personal identity in place of seeing himself as a solely a weapon when put next to Yingxing, with such a clear bold individual identity, really makes the transformation of one into the other all the more jarring and tragic. Especially with the emphasis on how Yingxing hated the abominations of Abundance only to become one himself, something that is still implied to have not been by his own hand. Blade is an immensely tragic character, but that tragedy only holds weight because of the life and identity Yingxing had. It is only with Yingxing’s light which shined despite the circumstances of his life that his descent into darkness hits harder, and it makes me so sad that I haven’t found many others talking or expanding upon this despite my searches because he really is such a well written character with so many details in his story that are both interesting and utterly heartbreaking.

And additionally, I want to say that I think there is a lost potential in examining the Xianzhou through Yingxing. Specifically in the way he is treated as a short life species. We know how the relationship between the Vidyadhara and the Natives, especially as it’s changed after Dan Feng, but there is a very interesting relationship to be explored between the Xianzhou and the Short Life Species the end up there, especially through Yingxing’s relationship to the different Artisans guilds whether on the Luofu or the Zhuming.

In the end, it becomes another sad element to Yingxing’s story. Yingxing managed to change his attitude regarding how the Zhuming masters treated him and even grew more of a confidence, but even in the Luofu's Artisanship Commission, he can never truly get as far as he deserves. Just as Jingliu says

Even with his work impressing the master craftsmen of the Luofu, even after more than showing his skill and earning the title of Furnace Master for that skill, he still would be denied higher positions and could only prove his true worth by the High Cloud Quintet.

And just let me say it again, him being a short life species allows for such an interesting examination of the world and people around him based upon that. While we don't know exactly how they met, we do know that Yingxing was Huaiyan's personal disciple and the only one he mentions of the celestial masters to treat him with respect and believe in his capabilities despite knowing he's a short life species. Through his treatment of Yingxing, we learn quite a bit about him. Through Baiheng's treatment of him as well, we learn a lot about her, more than anywhere else.

He's just UGH I need more exploration from Yingxing's perspective, the lack of it feels as if I'm being starved. He's so interesting, he's so fun, he's incredibly tragic, and he makes me cry every single time he crosses my mind. Please do yourselves a favor and think more about his character so you'll end up as sad about him as me. Or don't maybe. I dunno. All I know for sure is that you absolutely need to read Views of the Universe From a Starskiff: The Zhuming if you haven't. Anyways bye, thanks for listening to this rant, I gotta go cry over him.

Peep the tags also for a rant about my own characterization of YX if you wish to witness my insanity

[ch3rry-v0dka]

Kind of stupid how much hard work goes into having a soulmate alas

[bedforddanes75]

my issue with terminology discourse isnt that i think everyone's stupid and sensitive it's that literally nobody explains the meanings of things and then get pissy when people dont know what things mean

[watery-melon-baller]

its so fun :)) and awesome :)) that i cannot fucking make my brain focus on my homework :))) holy shit im gonna kill someone :)) why can't my brain just work for five fucking minutes :)) this is easy homework too I just can't concentrate on it at all :)) and it's due tomorrow morning :)))

[ioannemos]

me, writing about a character being injured and another character caring for them: hell yeah FU*K yeah baby this is the GOOD shit

me, having to figure out how injuries and the care thereof actually works: *screaming, crying, gnashing of teeth, etc*

[eohachu]

re: the cql poll. i've said this before and i'll say it again: song lan's death was and still is the most evil murder i've seen in a drama. i've seen a lot of unjust and devastating character deaths, but this one tops everything else in question of execution and emotional damage. a murderer who has no means to find out who he murdered (his lifelong partner) and a victim who has a way to communicate who he is but chooses not to because the murderer wouldn't be able to live with this burden. and the villain who abused both of them, who specifically used their disabilities to his own advantage - who specifically mutilated song lan in order to have him eliminated by his own lifelong partner, just to keep him around as a puppet, with xiao xingchen, again, having no way to find out and with song lan, while constantly being painfully aware of what happened, having no means to communicate any of this to him.

and with a teenage girl being an immediate eye witness to all of this.

[wehowl]

so i've added elijah back to my muse list (bc yeah i was writing him with @rozaliina without him on my muse list) but things to note: i am going to be VERY VERY VERY selective with him. so basically if elijah is the only muse you're interested with on my blogs, then it'd probably be in your best interest to move on. that sounds harsh but....... very very very selective.

also note number two: leah mikaelson (@troubleah) is canon to him. which means even in threads not with leah, if their siblings are mentioned, leah will be a part of that. sometimes even named. rn i don't have this in his bio but i will add it once i have the brain power. but yeah leah is bbiest sis and elijah loves her

[daz4i]

a bit insane to know there's people out there who think i'm hot shit tbh. you know i'm a pathetic cringefail loser who literally can't do anything, right?? please raise your standards 😔💔