#i feel like this crazy theory makes sense... at least to me...

[buckydeservesthebest]

I want to start by apologizing for my previous post, it was terribly terse, and I didn't explain myself as I'd have liked, as I ignored many factors that must be taken into account. The truth is that I wrote it while I was in college online classes... it wasn't my best idea...

Back to the topic. You have interesting points. I think this is a much more complex topic than we initially thought... The mouse in my head didn't stop spinning until I came up with this two-cent theory:

I’d like to start with the point that it actually makes a lot of technical sense that Bucky under the Winter Soldier programming possesses the memories of what happened in his missions prior to the memory wipe. I mean, it doesn't mean at all that every instant the WS is activated he remembers everything, but that the memories are there and when his handlers order him to give information, he can, with some effort, access them.

Let me explain, the first decades after Bucky's capture, HYDRA tried in all its capabilities to eliminate all his memories and thus make his identity disappear, as they needed a… it hurts me to say it… blank canvas that offered no resistance to start with the conditioning and programming. But we know that all this presumed "wiped" memory was never truly gone, as Bucky finally regained his identity, so in reality what they did was not to erase but only to suppress all this data in a very recondite place in the subconscious of his brain so Bucky's consciousness could not manifest itself and interfere with the Winter Soldier's programming.

But according to Zola's notes (in The Wakanda Files book) even without an outside stimulus to help him remember his past life, as Steve was, Bucky was already beginning to manifest memory fragments and emotions on his own, which is why immediately after each mission they would place him in cryostasis and at the start of each new mission they would begin the process of memory erasure and the use of trigger words.

My point is, no matter how much damage HYDRA did to Bucky's brain over the decades, they could NEVER truly erase the memories of his past life, so that means the memories Bucky acquired as the Winter Soldier could not be erased either.

In reality, it would not be convenient for them to continue to cause such severe damage to Bucky's presumed “formatted” memory, because his brain must still be able to apprehend information. In fact, it is under the REM sleep state (the type of trance to which the Winter Soldier is subjected) that the brain is most receptive to information, there the brain regions used for learning are stimulated. That makes sense why HYDRA chose this type of trance, because it is the best way to make the human brain accept new information... basically, reprogramming it.

Trying to eliminate the memories the Winter Soldier acquired during his missions is directly proportional to the brain damage caused. And severe amnesia causes damage to semantic memory (general knowledge, facts and concepts), procedural memory (this is the memory of skills and procedures), short-term memory (the ability to retain new information) and anterograde memory (refers to the difficulty to form new memories after the onset of amnesia).

All of this would be counterproductive for HYDRA, as after every memory wipe before every mission, they would have to basically retrain the Winter Soldier in combat tactics, use of weaponry, tactics to leave the scene of the crime unseen and without leaving a trace, and a long etcetera... This is definitely a situation they don't want to deal with...

This must mean that the ECT to erase Bucky's memories must be located more specifically in the oldest memories, those of his past life that make him who he is. Long-term memory is mainly stored in the hippocampus, according to the studies I could read, and precisely in the Wakanda Files book, Shuri says that this is the area most widely affected.

But leaving aside the more technical aspect, and returning to what Marvel has let us see, it is worth noting that when Zemo asked Bucky for the specific place in Siberia where he was held captive was *after* having pronounced the trigger words and the Winter Soldier was activated, because Bucky would never have shared that information voluntarily.

Zemo: "Why don't we discuss your home? Not Romania. Certainly not Brooklyn, no. I mean, your real home" (this is the moment when Zemo shows Bucky the red book and starts to say the trigger words, with no other flashing scenes).

That means Bucky did remember what he talked to Zemo about while he was under the Winter Soldier trance, because well, that's the information he gave Steve and Sam.

Also, there's the fact that Bucky remembers information about the other WS, like they were HYDRA's most efficient assassins before receiving the serum, etc... (the following flashback about them seemed to be a flashback Bucky had, at least that's the impression I got). This is information he must have heard by the time his handlers had assigned him the task of physically training them. And this seems to be something Zemo asked him as well, as Bucky thought that was the reason he wanted to get to Siberia. And in any case if this was information that Zemo told Bucky in that moment, it'd still mean that he remembers what happened under the Winter Soldier state.

And Zemo's comment: “Did you really think I wanted more of you?” reinforces the idea that they talked about it. (By “you” Zemo must be referring to Bucky, as he replies, “what the hell?” in confusion.)

So why couldn't Bucky recognize Steve and Natasha? My theory is that the WS's level of conditioning and programming is such that he is literally incapable of performing an action that is not part of the order his handlers gave him. I mean, if they ask him for information about a much earlier event, as Zemo did, Bucky is forced to go out of his way to remember and access those memory files that do exist, even if they are very hidden, but if the action of remembering is not part of the order then he doesn't have to, or rather, is unable to remember.

Note: I think this shocking degree of conditioning could be seen in the training of the other WS. For the order given to Bucky was to train them, and one of them seemed to hold the upper hand in combat. But once the situation got out of control and Korpov ordered him to get him to safety, the order changed and he was able to defeat almost all of the WS single handedly. All this maintains the familiar stance that the Winter Soldier exists only to obey... i'm not okay... 😭

Also, when Bucky questioned Pierce about who Steve was, it was because when a tiny fraction of his memories came back, a tiny fraction of his personality surfaced, and this allowed him to ask a question. For the Winter Soldier never questions, because he doesn't have that capacity. So, I wouldn't say it was so much that “what Bucky’s handler said doesn't make sense for him, but he can't be sure” but rather that he was incapable of performing on his own the act of trying to recall and access those memories of the supposed mission Pierce was telling him about. (added to the fact that his short-term and long-term memory are in constant flux, something he cannot control... I'll explain it below)

Natasha's case is simpler because the assigned mission for the Winter Soldier was to neutralize or assassinate her, remembering her was not part of the order of course, also she doesn't represent anything important in Bucky's life to remember, unlike Steve.

But he couldn't remember Steve when they met again on the Helicarrier either, right? Well, Bucky also had no flashback manifestations when Steve called him “Buck”, unlike the first time. I think it was the fact that HYDRA subjected Bucky to another ETC within a short time of each other - which they hadn't had the need to do before - or perhaps that this ECT was more intense, which caused Bucky to take much longer for a fragment of his memories to manifest.

That's why it took longer for Steve to try to get him to remember, tell him that his name is James Buchanan Barnes, that they are friends and have known each other all their lives, and it was until the end with “I'm with you until the end of the line” that finally a glimpse of Bucky's memories came back. I mean, Steve had to try a lot harder this time to get the same effect that calling him “Bucky” had the first time.

Note: I feel like besides the new ETC, the reason it took Bucky a lot longer to remember was because that was the order Pierce gave him, like “if that guy in disguise wants to make you think you know him, don't listen to him, you don't know him, don't think and just take him out” or something like that... and hence the very aggressive reaction to try to combat the resurgence of memories…

I find it interesting that at the very end of CA: TWS, despite Bucky remembering a sliver of his life, which gave him back his autonomy, there was not a flashback of his life before being captured by HYDRA to follow, unlike the first time Steve called him by name. So, I think maybe this could mean that in this case, he didn't have a manifestation of episodic memory, i.e. a memory with images, voices, etc. But rather it was a manifestation of emotional or associative memory, i.e. feeling that he knew Steve and feeling that he was a very important person to him, feeling that he was his family...

Note: Associative memory is memory through associations, such as a smell or a song, in this case I'd say it was the phrase “I'm with you until the end of the line”...

Did in the following time, more memories and flashbacks manifested in Bucky's mind? Well, this is difficult to answer, because there is nothing to indicate that his rate of memory retrieval is linear or constant, I mean, it is not continuous or patterned.

In fact, in the book The Wakanda Files, Shuri says that repaired memory centers/retrieved memories are temporary! For Bucky's short- and long-term memory are in constant flux.

"it was as if Sergeant Barnes was in REM sleep while awake, in a dream-like state where he would comply with orders. And while in this induced state of mind, his short- and long-term memory were constantly in flux. However, the shared memories of Barnes with his best friend, Steve Rogers, *momentarily* fired memory centers, jogging bits and pieces of his past life while in the sleeplike trance." “It would seem that stimulus, especially emotionally resonant stimulus – the sight of a loved one, the mentioning of a familiar phrase, etc – has the ability to access a presumed “wiped” memory in those who have been brainwashed… *at least for a fleeting moment*.” – The Wakanda Files

So, this means that if Bucky retrieves a certain amount of memories at a certain instant, he may no longer have them a moment later. That explains why his backpack was just full of notebooks with notes everything he can remember, for fear of losing those memories, just like those with Alzheimer's, as Seb put it.

So, the idea that Bucky didn't quite recognize Steve at their meeting in Bucharest is not far-fetched, because it's possible that at that time he didn't quite have memories of him or their friendship but only what he read about him in the museum. So, his response “I read about you in the museum” would technically be true!

Then, the idea that Bucky had access to all the memories of his past life at the end of CA: TWS is actually not correct. In fact, it can be seen in CW, in the talk he had with Steve when they arrived in Siberia, that the memories of their childhood together were something he was remembering even at that point, as he didn't remember Dolores' name, for example. The point is, each and every one of Bucky's memories come and go (maybe only until before he got help from Wakanda), so they can be there one moment and for the other not, he can go a long time with no trouble remembering and a second later lose a bit of information.

Now, according to all this we can make a relationship between the percentage of memory obtained, the percentage of personality/identity manifested and the degree of influence of the Winter Soldier programming. We have that:

Percentage of memories gained is proportional to percentage of identity manifested.

% of acquired memories = % of manifested identity.

The percentage of manisfested identity is inversely proportional to the degree of influence of the Winter Soldier's programming.

In other words, the more memories Bucky recovers, the more of his personality comes to the surface and the less effect the WS trance state has on him.

This may explain the change in Bucky's personality at the beginning in Bucharest, for if by that time the amount of memories he possessed was small, i.e. his manifested personality was not complete (ergo: the Winter Soldier trance state was still influencing his behavior), then his continued nervousness and hyper-vigilance - yes, this in addition to the PTSD already present - was normal. And this would explain the slightly more aggressive behavior when fighting the SWAT team in the fight in his apartment. Also, did you notice how Bucky knocked Steve down immediately after he touched his shoulder? It was a self-defense reaction based on the tension induced by the trance-like state of the Winter Soldier.

Note: I believe Bucky was really really trying hard not to kill or hurt anyone, but the influence of the WS trance-type, which is mostly violence, was still having an effect on him (sorry if I have said it many times already, but I feel that if I don't, the sentence loses meaning), so he couldn't control the aggressiveness of his fighting form even when he tried. But our boy is so good that in the end he was able to control himself enough to actually not kill anyone... :')

Now, following this logic, this would also explain Bucky's more relaxed and cooperative behavior after passing out, as the severe head concussion would have brought back his memories/consciousness in a way analogous to how the emotional stimuli from the outside (the power of friendship) did the two times in CA: TWS. That being the case, Bucky immediately recognized his best friend and returned that affection and that gentle, soft manner with which he always treated him in the past.

Note: This means that the concussion to the head had a greater effect in giving Bucky back some of his memory, as opposed to the external emotional stimuli whose effect seems smaller (sorry Steve).

You can see in his body language how the memories started to flow in his mind… “Your mom's name was Sarah...You used to wear newspapers in your shoes.” He even laughed when he said this! That is a spontaneous reaction to a thought that is forming at that moment.

So, the sequence of events, where Bucky first asks “what did I do?” and then with effort remembers what he talked to Zemo after the Winter Soldier was activated, is not contradictory, because:

i) His short and long term memory is in constant flux.

ii) He had just woken up from a concussion fainting so it's natural that he was confused and that it took a while for his memories to start flowing.

Note: In this scene he appears to hit his head as he releases his arm from the chair, was this intentional? Was he trying to knock himself out before Zemo finished uttering the trigger words? Had he succeeded, he would have regained his memories upon awakening... 😭😭

Now, finally speaking of Tony, does it make sense that Bucky said he remembers all the victims he was forced to kill? The answer is yes, it can make sense, in the interpretation in which that information exists in Bucky's brain, those memories are stored there. And Bucky's ability to access those memories, while volatile, also exists. And by probability, the possibility that at some point in time all of those memories will suddenly appear in Bucky's mind, also exists.

Perhaps... perhaps and at that moment, in which Bucky said that to Tony, he had indeed remembered a large number of those victims, maybe not all of them because he could not be sure, but a considerable amount that in the metaphorical sense can be taken as “all”... that is possible...

Then there is the more symbolic perspective of the situation, where saying “I remember all of them” is a way of saying “all those deaths are something I'll carry forever, even if I don't remember literally all their faces... their deaths matter to me....” ... this is the interpretation I always had of the scene....

Note 1: But I also agree with the interpretation that by saying this, even when true, Bucky was giving Tony the excuse he was looking for to try to kill him... and if someone had to die there, Bucky wanted to make sure that was him... tell me our boy is one of the noblest characters of all without telling me! 😭 Note 2: I totally agree that, although Bucky remembers the people he was forced to kill, it would be in any case, a memory of only their faces and not their identities, because this cannot be deduced (unless HYDRA gave him the names, but I think this was never shown), as in the case of Tony's parents, certainly Bucky did not know their identity until the moment he saw the recording...

So, well, I feel all of this would disprove the idea that Bucky tends to lie or fudge the truth about his memories to put the situation in his favor (which, indeed, there is absolutely nothing wrong with), because Bucky is at the mercy of the volatility of the manifestation of his memories, and he can only rely on what he remembers at the time. Also, nothing that has been seen about Bucky indicates that he ever lied to turn things on his favor.

We can come to the conclusion that it is not a question of whether in the ABC situations he was Bucky or was not (not counting the time he was under the control of HYDRA, because here Bucky did not exist), but the percentage of Bucky's consciousness/personality that manifests. Nor about whether his memories are reliable or not, but about the volatile flow of memories that come and go and the ability to access this information that always exists.

*Again, I apologize for the wrong impression I gave in my first post, on the subject of emotional detachment to memories and whether Bucky's memories were reliable or not, i expressed myself terribly badly, so please feel free to ignore it.*

.

Now, talking about whether TFATWS confirmed the fact that Bucky remembers everyone. The short answer is yes. This was the premise of the series, and the book "The Falcon and The Winter Soldier: The Art of the Series", which we can consider canon because it was published by the entire production of the series, clarifies it:

In fact, Bucky's line in episode 6 also confirms it: “You think your cause justifies all this death, but in the end, the nightmares won’t go away. You’re gonna remember all the ones you killed. Trust me. Don’t do this. Don’t go down this path.” (no Bucky, HYDRA was never your cause, because your consciousness didn't even exist at that time!)

There is also Spellman's comment he gave in an interview: "So when Bucky enters the series, he's never ever shaken what he believes, which is, 'I remember everyone, murders, which means that part of me was there, which means a part of the Winter Soldier is me.' And if even a fraction of Winter Soldier is you, you are an awful person."

Talking about the idea that the show doesn't explicitly say that Bucky's nightmares are memories. Actually, the show did say that, again in a Bucky line:

Sam: “You still having those nightmares?”

Bucky: “All the time. It means I remember. It means a part of me is still there. Which means a part of the Winter Soldier’s still in me."

Yeah, it’s clear that he seeks information about those victims in order to make amends, but those nightmares are still memories, because those events are information, and well, by definition a memory is the brain's ability to retain and retrieve information.

Nightmare = Memory = Information

Speaking about the amends, well, in fact, it was never explicitly said that the government imposed them on Bucky as a condition of his pardon. In reality, only mandatory therapy was discussed as the only condition. That's why in episode two, the cops arrested him for not attending the mandatory session.

In the conversation between Bucky and Dr. Raynor it is made clear that it is the government's intention to be sure that he is a “non-dangerous member for society” (the real dangerous people were the ones who at the time were the Winter Soldier's handlers, as by himself he didn't have the capacity to do anything!). And therefore, the necessity of mandatory therapy...

“You’re a civilian now. With your history, the government needs to know that you’re not gonna… It’s a condition of your pardon. So, tell me about your most recent nightmare.”

That's why the only issue she wants to talk about is whether he's still having nightmares, not whether he's made progress with the amendments: “So, Mr. Barnes, are you still having nightmares?” “So, tell me about your most recent nightmare.”

And later again: “So, you did it all right, but it didn’t help with the nightmares.”

It seems that for Dr. Raynor nightmares are considered as “a sign that something is not right" (no! they are a manifestation of PTSD caused by decades of torture and are treated with years of a real healthy therapy!), so it has to be worked on so that Bucky can reintegrate into society. And for that, it was concluded that Bucky “had to make amends to make him feel better" (that's not how this works, on the contrary, it's only harmful to him!).

It always seemed to me that amends are something that Bucky wanted to do. I mean, it's an idea that came from him. He let Dr. Raynor know about it at some point and she imposed those “three rules” on him...

And about the idea that Bucky didn't have nightmares in Louisiana because he wasn't thinking about the list. Actually, Bucky told Sam that he has nightmares all the time... this has nothing to do with thinking about that list or not...

Sam: “You still having those nightmares?”

Bucky: “All the time....”

Again, nightmares are one of the many ways in which PTSD manifests itself and depending on the severity (Bucky's case must be the most severe there has ever been) it requires years or decades of real healthy therapy to disappear, if it disappears at all. In addition, what Bucky suffers from is NOT only PTSD, but irreversible brain damage and many serious mental illnesses... and none of this is going to magically disappear because of "Sam's motivational speech and putting himself at the service of others" (which is nothing more than victim blaming and... ahhh.. but I won't talk about it right now)...

So, the possibility Bucky will always have nightmares is very high... 😢😭

Maybe this is part of the reason we find him in such a depressing state in Thunderbolts???? :'((((

“That line was an interesting moment. At the time, the choice I was making is that [Bucky] had realized there was no way he was getting out of there, and someone was gonna die, whether it was gonna be him, Steve or Tony. When he says that line, to me, it was a turning point — he was, like, ‘Okay, I know what you want me to say, and I’m just gonna say it.’ When someone comes at you over and over again, and they can’t hear you, they can’t see you’re pleading with them, you’re trying to figure out how to get through to them and they just won’t accept it, at some point you just give in, and you go, ‘that’s right, that’s what you want.’ Of course [Bucky] didn’t remember them all.” —  Sebastian Stan

[snekdood]

so august 2018 is when my peak being-crazy-made art craziness happened, huh

[moonyysgirl]

No one will ever compare-Remus Lupin x reader

pairing; remus lupin x fem!reader summary; remus and reader are childhood best friends, remus is afraid of not being good enough with pleasuring girls, so he decides to ask for reader's help on a hot and boring summer day cw; smut, soft!remus, cocky!remus, rem is horny!! best friends to lovers if you squint

It was a hot July afternoon. You and Remus were hanging out by your pool, like every summer since you were kids. You were already tired of summer, and you couldn’t wait to be back at Hogwarts, but at least you could spend some time with Remus.

He was your childhood best friend, and your parents loved him since he was a child. You  always had kind of a secret crush on him, since you were eleven, and by the time you were sixteen the feeling had become more of an habit.

You would’ve never confess your feelings to Remus, cause you didn’t want to ruin the friendship and all that crap, so you just came to terms with the fact that nothing would ever happen. You were happy with being his best mate, and even though sometimes you would fantasize about him in bed, you didn't think of him like that. 

But lately things had changed: you would often catch Remus glancing at you, his eyes lingering on your body longer than usual. He was always twitchy and snappy around you and maybe it was all in your head, but you swore you could sense a weird tension between the two of you.

"Fuck" Remus swore suddenly, distracting you from your thoughts. He was laying on the sun bed next to yours, a pair of black sunglasses covering his eyes, his damp hair falling on his forehead in ashy blond chunks.

"What is it'", Remus turned the magazine he was looking at to you, a famous actress was smiling maliciously on the page "She's so hot" Remus whined. You shrugged "seems pretty average to me".

Remus sighed deeply “maybe, maybe you're right, maybe I'm just too horny" "Remus!" he would always talk about those things with you, and you would always be annoyed, in theory because it made you uncomfortable, but it was actually because it turned you on.

Remus laughed "what? I'm serious, I need to get laid! The last time I had sex was like a century ago!”. Actually it was like a couple of months before, and you remembered it well because you pretended it didn't bother you just to get wasted at the three broomsticks…and to make out with some random revenclaw.

You rolled your eyes “ugh, you're so boring" “sorry, I didn't realize I was being too gross for you! But I'm a human, and I'm horny! and I need to get laid! and it is also too fucking hot!" he slurred out in exasperation.

“Did you ever thought that maybe you won't get laid cause your game sucks?” “Uhm? excuse me?" “It’s a real possibility you know, do you even know how to please a girl?" “Fucking hell I know! Padfoot taught me! And I think he taught me well…if you know what I mean” he winked at you with that stupid cocky smile on his lips.

You turned to him with a sarcastic smile "oh, sorry, I didn't realize Sirius was the ultimate master of getting laid!" "ohhh, now I get it!" he teased "you're jealous because I didn't come to you first!" "huh? what are you even talking about?" “It’s cause you wanted to teach me!" 

You sighed “no Remus, that would be crazy, but I realistically am more informed than Sirius on the topic" "is this a coming out or something?” you rolled your eyes and sighed “Remus! I obviously mean that I know best cause I'm a girl, and logically girls knows what other girls  wants" you picked the magazines from his hands and started going through it. 

“Actually, that sounds like a good idea" you turned to Remus “what" "you're probably more useful than Siri" “yeah, no shit, and?” “and you can help me get better so I'll finally get laid!" you rolled your eyes again "yeah, okay, I'll draw you a picture later" "y/n! I'm being serious!" you finally put the magazine down “Remus, what do you even want me to do?" 

Remus grinned, a wolfish smile curving his lips "I mean…I could practice on you!" the air caught up in your throat, your breath hitched. You couldn’t possibly have heard that right. You swallowed, your mouth was dry all of a sudden. 

“Remus, you're being weird" you cut him off, he sat down "yeah but think about it, we’ve been friends since forever, it won't be embarrassing, and you could seriously help me get lai-

"would you stop? just wank it off or something" you interrupted him, your face starting to burn “y/n! don't you want your best friend to get laid? it's for a good cause!" you pretended to read the magazine, but your mind was already visualizing the scene. 

"Hey, if it really makes you uncomfortable I'll just shut up and we'll never talk about it again, but I really need someone to help me to get better with this stuff”. You sighed. It was too weird, and you couldn't believe it was actually happening, but on the other hand...you did spend the last two years or so fantasizing about Remus hands every other night…it could be your last shot. 

"I'll go upstairs" the words slurred out of your mouth before you could stop them "you can follow me if you want" your face was red, your heart was beating in your ears, you turned to Remus. He was grinning from ear to ear.

You got up quickly, suddenly feeling exposed in your bikini, and went upstairs in a rush, without turning behind once, praying that your mother would keep gardening outside for another hour at least. 

You went into your bedroom and closed the door behind you. You immediately went and looked at the window, it faced the pool. The curtains were shut down, the window slightly open. You peeked through the curtains, Remus was going inside, you could feel the excitement filling your stomach. 

Before you could do anything you heard a knock on the door. You swallowed. “Come in” Remus opened the door just to close it behind him. He leaned on it for some time looking at you. “So” he said “so…” you responded. You couldn’t hold eye contact with him, so you kept looking at your feet on the cold pavement, leaving wet prints on the floor.

“How should we do this?” Your breath hitched, it was actually happening. You shrugged “um, I guess I’ll lay down” you weren’t sure of what you were doing, but you couldn’t stand standing in a bikini under his wandering eyes for any longer.

You climbed on your bed, it was undone, the sheets  all crumpled under you, and you thought about how your swimming suit was still wet, but in that moment the wet stains on the sheets were actually the last thing on your mind. You laid on those crumpled sheets, your pillows under your head.

Remus walked to the bad and sat on it in front of you. “Maybe we should kiss” your heart skipped a beat “huh?” Remus stretched “yeah, I mean, to break the ice, you know?” You wet your lips “um, well, I guess we could but-“ you bit your nail “won’t it be weird or something?”

Remus shook his head “of course it won’t, it’s not like we’re actually kissing, it’s just for practice you know? It should be fine” you shrugged “well, I guess” you kept biting at your nails “well if you don’t stop torturing your nails I won’t actually be able to do anything” you smiled nervously, immediately sliding your hands under your thighs “oh! You’re right..”

Remus came closer to you, your knees touching, you sat up to be at his eye level “so, I’m just gonna kiss you okay?” You nodded “here I come” he smiled. You closed your eyes, out of fear and excitement, and Remus lips were suddenly pressed on yours.

Those lips that you dreamed and desired profusely for half of your life were suddenly on yours. And it felt so real. So good. His lips were wet, warm. He tasted like chlorine and suncream.

You wanted more, so you tried deepening the kiss, your tongue pressing on his lips, he opened them, your tongue meeting with his, and all of a sudden you could feel your whole body warming.

Remus kept the kiss slow, steady. You could feel yourself breathing heavily against him. He pressed his body to yours, and you instinctively lowered yourself down to the mattress.

Remus was now on top of you, and his hands were wandering on your waist, hips, hair, making your body covered in goosebumps for the feeling of his wet and cold swimming trunks against you.

What was even happening? You didn’t know, but as long as Remus tongue was swirling with yours like that, and as long his hands kept wandering on you in that way, you didn’t care. The kiss was becoming messy, sloppy, and now you could feel Remus breath becoming heavy.

Your hips bucked into his. He whimpered, and just like that he was breaking the kiss, a string of saliva lingering between you. He sat back down, and you sat up too, to look at him.

His face was all flushed, his cheeks were burning, his lips were wet and swollen, his eyes darker than usual. Both of you had messy knotted wet hair, the sheets were completely damp at that point. “Okay, I think it was a good warm up” he said, a little smile curving his lips.

You could actually feel the pleasure pooling to your warm core, so you squirmed your thighs together, your heart pounding in your chest. You tried regulating your breath. You knew you looked as messy as Remus, but you tried not to think about it.

“Should we?” Your breath caught up in your throat again, you swallowed “uhm, yeah, I guess” “okay, so, I think you should lay down” you did that, slightly shaking in anticipation. He was sitting in between of your parted legs, your knees bended, your feet steady on the mattress under you. 

You closed your eyes, you were scared, slightly shaking. He placed his hands on your thighs, they were warm, steady, reassuring, so big that they inclosed your thighs completely. His hand climbed slowly on your inner thigh, getting closer to your core, you held your breath.

“Are you okay?” You nodded “do you still wanna do this?” you nodded again, so his hand went higher. He slowly moved your swimsuit to the side, the wet material peeling away from your skin. Your core was now partly exposed, the cool air sending a shiver down on your spine, you were burning with embarrassment. 

“Can I?” Remus was speaking softly, you swallowed, your eyes still closed, you nodded again, incapable of bringing yourself to speak. His fingers stroked the inner of your thigh gently, before going to your core. You immediately squirmed, Remus waited for a couple of seconds before softly moving your legs out of the way.

“I’m just gonna do it as Padfoot taught me” he said “just tell me how I’m doing alright?” You nodded again. You didn’t want to look at him, you didn’t want to think about the fact that he was looking at you, you felt naked and exposed, but as his fingers started sliding through your folds slowly you could also feel your mind going blank.

As you were feeling the wetness dripping from your core, you were beyond embarrassed at the thought of him feeling how aroused you actually were, your previous courage seemed a distant memory. He spread your wetness to your folds slowly. 

Your skin was burning as he went higher, you cursed under your breath when his thumb brushed against your clit. Even if your eyes were closed you knew that he was smiling. He started drawing slow circles on your clit, exactly as you imagined it a thousand times before. 

You couldn’t breathe as he picked up his pace, you couldn’t move either, scared that you wouldn’t be able to hold back the moans. His fingers kept slipping, and the swimsuit was getting in the way, but you were gone either way under his soft touch.

He increased the pace slightly, getting faster on your clit, “how’s it?” You couldn’t speak, you just kept nodding, scared of what could come out of your mouth if you opened it. With his other hand he started caressing the inner of your thigh, slowly, slightly tickling you, you felt yourself starting to melt. 

He was trying to reassure you with those gently strokes on your skin, he wanted for you to relax, you could feel it, so you slowly started breathing again. He went faster, and your automatically grabbed his wrist, your thighs squirming together.

“Is everything okay?” He said softly, you nodded “how am I doing?” “Great” you said finally, your breath slightly shaking “should I slow down?” You shook your head “no, go on”

Remus got confident, encouraged by your words, and his touch became more secure, faster, rougher. You could feel yourself melting into the mattress. Your thighs relaxed and naturally fell open. 

In that position you could feel everything more intensely, you whimpered. Even if your eyes were closed you could feel his eyes on you. You bit your lip, trying to hold back the moans. Your hair was tickling your neck and arms, adding to your pleasure.

Suddenly he shoved two fingers inside you, deep, reaching to parts you never reached before. You couldn’t help but moan loudly, opening your eyes in surprisement. “Does it hurt?” You shook your head, Remus was looking at you in amazement, his pupils bigger than ever, his lips half parted, his cheeks flushed, he never looked more beautiful.

He placed his knee on your thigh, to prevent you from squirming. That sent you over the edge. You started arching your back, your hips bucking on his fingers. Your lips fell open, and the room filled with moans and whimpers that you’d never thought you were capable of, almost pornographic.

Remus looked at the window worried, your mother was outside gardening. The window was semi open, the curtains were practically the only thing separating you. However he wasn’t getting any slower, his fingers going in and out at a numbing pace. Your body was covered in goosebumps.

You couldn’t bring yourself to care about the noise you were making, in that moment there was only Remus, Remus and his body, Remus and his fingers. As he started drawing circles on your clit again you let out a loud, obscene, moan. Remus covered your mouth with his other hand “shhh, not so loud”.

You grabbed his wrist, you were squirming under him, his knee keeping your thigh in place, his hand pressing your mouth shut. You shut your eyes closed, you could feel the tears approaching, the knot in your throat tightening, the warmth in your stomach intensifying.

“Y/n?” He whispered, you opened your mouth against his hand, he didn’t move it. You were now shaking uncontrollably, your brain going completely blank, you couldn’t think of anything, “are you okay?” Remus whispered, you nodded.

“Am I doing good?” Remus asked again “yeah” you responded against his hand, “so good” you mumbled, your words muffled, your lips pressed against the skin of his hand. Your knees started to give in, your back arching.

His fingers were relentlessly pounding in and out of you, fogging your brain. Your hips were bucking against his fingers, getting impossibly faster, your grip tightening around his wrist. Your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

“Are you gonna cum?” “Yeah” you moaned against his had. He pounded in and out of you at an impossible speed, you grabbed the sheet with your hand, the other grasping Remus’ wrist. “Yeah, just like that” he spoke softly. You came with a loud moan, spasming against his fingers, his hand on your mouth getting tighter “Shhh”.

He pumped in and out of you for a couple more times, and when the feeling started to overwhelm you hot tears spilled from your closed eyes. At that point Remus slowed down, he took his knee off from your thigh, and his hand from your lips, a strand of saliva connecting them with his skin. 

He carefully adjusted your swimming suit, and without saying nothing he wiped your tears from your cheeks with his thumbs. You opened your eyes slowly, he was looking at you, his face was red, he was smiling. 

“I guess Padfoot is the actual master of getting laid after all, huh?” “Oh, fuck off” You responded out of embarrassment, blushing. Remus laughed “come on, I was good wasn’t I?” “I guess…” you lowered your gaze shyly.

“What’s wrong?” You sighed “it’s just…I feel like I was so loud and messy and…I’m so embarrassed” you whined covering your face with your hands. Remus grabbed your wrists “come on y/n, don’t be embarrassed” he removed your hands from your face.

“Come on, now we know that I don’t actually need to get better at least!” he grinned, you rolled your eyes “yeah okay thanks for making me feel better” you lowered your gaze again. Remus sighed. “Hey y/n” he said, suddenly more serious “look at me”, you raised your gaze slowly to meet his eyes “you weren’t embarrassing, I promise” you shrugged “alright”.

Remus laid down next to you, on his side. He brought his lips closer to your ear “you were actually hotter than ever...like...more than I've ever seen” he whispered, your heart skipped a beat, your cheeks immediately blushing.

“Actually, I don’t think I’ll be able to touch another girl…like ever, without comparing her to you” you bit your lip, your heart was pounding out of your chest “no one will ever compare” he whispered, his hot breath against your skin sending shivers to your spine.

Remus laid down on his back, and grabbed your hand, his fingers still slick with your arousal, you closed your eyes, your heart beating in your ears, your breath shaking, the boy of your dreams laying next to you, holding your hand.

[thewertsearch]

TT: So what about Jade? […] TT: You didn't tell her your expedition with her would result in your death, let alone one she'd inadvertently cause. TT: Or that she'd be stuck with the job of resuscitating you. Did you? TG: what am i really supposed to say TG: hey were gonna hunt frogs til you shoot me through the jack TG: then i die and youve got to make out with me TG: that kind of changes how the whole thing goes doesnt it

Plus, after the first loop, you already knew you weren't going to tell her. The window of opportunity to decide the circumstances of your death had already closed.

TG: you dont know anything TG: about what i was feeling or what happened on lofaf TG: you were all pavement faced and babbling your throefester speak and flipping off the shit with your own crazy deathwish thing why do you think you know what was going through my head TG: youre just assuming and throwing around psyche buzzwords like aspd complex disorder

I don't think we've ever seen Dave this angry.

I think he's earned it, to be honest. These kids have been stuck in Skaia's emotional pressure cooker for nearly 24 hours, and they’re all reaching their respective breaking points. Dave's had just about enough, and he needs to let it out.

TG: im telling you if i said anything at all about it she probably doesnt even fire her gun once and all im doing is dragging her into a doomed timeline with me TT: I guess I'm learning to be impressed by your sense of obligation to inevitable misfortune. It's a strange case of inspiration through futility.

Well, it’s complicated.

On a surface level, it really does look like his misfortune was predestined - but the more of Homestuck I read, the more I gravitate toward the theory I linked in my previous post - that the Alpha Timeline can only 'force' you to do things that are already consistent with your personality. After all, we still haven't really seen a time loop that forces a character to act against their own nature.

If it's true, then perhaps Dave’s getting these shitty loops because he expects them – and maybe, if he changed his perspective, he’d start to be presented with kinder ones. It's worth a try, at least.

It’s not like this is exclusively a Sburbian phenomenon, either. Outside of Homestuck, plenty of us feel like our personalities trap us in loops of our own, forcing us to repeatedly experience the same thoughts, actions or situations.

We might not be time travelers, but our own metaphorical loops can feel just as inescapable as the literal ones binding Dave.

TG: i was never that cool with this TT: With what, exactly? TG: you know how you turned out to be this incredibly shitty seer of light and basically failed at that in every way imaginable TT: Hey!

Eh, I think you deserved that one.

[danithy]

Davesport codependency

Speaking my truth because it's my tumblr and I've yet to be stopped!!1! Davesport - to me at least - is a codependent relationship, regardless of whether you see them as platonic or romantic. 

Although not the cause of their codependency, it is also important to note that there is a connection through the way they are united in their situation. Whereas other springlock victims had their heads replaced with phones and their memories erased, Jack and Dave survived as living corpses with their memories intact. Both regularly received comments on their physicality; Dave most often on his purple skin, and Jack most notably on how he looks soulless in Peter’s speech towards him in the legacy route of dsaf 2. While this isn’t verbally addressed, I do imagine it gives them a sense of companionship which already ties them together. 

Now, for their actual codependency: for Jack, the absence of his soul plays a major role. As Henry said in the found cassette tape: strong emotions manifest in the soul, and these determine the magnitude of a soul. With this I don’t mean to say Jack is emotionless; he still exhibits emotions in several scenes such as regret when redeeming himself as Legacy towards Blackjack, but I do imagine it messed up his already repressed emotional palate because Blackjack is a strong soul considering he was able to drag Henry towards the void. We also never see Jack (seriously) cry, outside of joke endings like soapy ending, but even in the dsaf 3 route he doesn’t cry: the little emotions he does experience are repressed. Dave, in contrast, functions merely on the remnant of his soul which repossesses his corpse and therefore harbours primarily strong emotions. Because Jack’s lack of a soul limits his feelings and emotions, I imagine he experiences them through Dave since the intensity of his soul more easily conveys onto Jack. He depends on Dave to feel alive and human; he is the soul to his heart. 

Now, as for Dave; he depends on his devotion to Henry and his legacy to be able to repossess his corpse, as also speculated by Henry in the joy_2 tape: “My current theory is that he repossessed his own body out of desperation.” To an extent, Dave tries to fill the hole where Henry once was in his life with Jack, exemplified in little ways such as Jack wearing the Fredbear suit and Dave even mentioning that it was Henry’s at some point. Now, there’s a noticeable shift between dsaf 1 & 2: in dsaf 1 Dave doesn’t view Jack as much of an equal, their conversations being impersonal and transactional, along with Dave calling Jack condescending nicknames such as kid. In dsaf 2 this changes; Jack is now exclusively called old sport, Dave follows him on several occasions, and from his diary entries we can see that he’s pretty crazy about Jack. I think this is because, somewhere in Vegas, Dave realised he made a friend who he could sympathise with, instead of a replacement for Henry. This, in my eyes, is what caused part of Dave’s devotion to shift towards Jack. Again, there’s a lot of things that show Dave’s attachment towards Jack is unhealthy; from his diary entries to Davetrap persistently staring through his window. Additionally, Davetrap doesn’t repossess his corpse when Jack decapitates him in dsaf 3’s bad ending, despite technically being able to. This shows that Jack turning on him is enough to finally make him abandon his vessel, and his soul’s devotion relies at least partially on Jack. 

Generally, Dave is more dependent than Jack; he needs Jack to be alive, whereas Jack only needs Dave to feel alive. I think this is also what allowed the 30-year gap between dsaf 2 & 3 where they didn’t see each other to happen. Dave had to be sealed in the saferoom to be kept from Jack, while Jack could manage on his own, although it likely made even more miserable. Doomed apart and doomed together. Basically; I hate them !!1!

[kanmom51]

I actually have a crazy theory...

I have already sent this ask as the response to someone else’s thoughts, but then I thought about it and I REALLY wanted to know your opinion about this.

I think Jikook by the beginning of last year didn't know they were enlisting together.

I think they obviously knew about buddy system but didn't actually think they would need to use it. Because it's not really done by idols, and also they both could've gone to safer and easier stations, where they could have more freedom.

BUT THEN Jimin started working intensely on his album and JK started acting out (like having drunken lives), and it became VERY CLEAR that they would not be able to do 18 months apart.

I mean do you remember, that at this time JK said himself that he was not working on anything. And I think the plan was for Jimin to go first (just like a lot of us thought he would) and for JK to have more time for promo alone, when others are gone (I’m pretty sure that HYBE definitely wanted for JK to have big solo debut apart from other members).

But then like I said the drunken lives happened and realization hit, that they have to apply for buddy system, that 18 months apart would be BAD for both of them.

And that's when HYBE (or whoever) made specific demands from JK. Like if he wanted to leave by the end of the year (and he had to for buddy system to work) he HAS TO do the album, and because there was no time to write it from scratch they got all the English songs. Also his schedule was extremely packed and difficult.

So I think that the travel show was something Jikook specifically done for themselves because JK's schedule was so insane that if not for that excuse they would not be able to hang out freely before the enlistment. (By the way am I the only one who thinks that we are getting the travel show only next year? And waiting for it now is kinda crazy?)

But again it's just my theory, mostly because HYBE doesn't feel (to me) like the company who would just let their artists do whatever they want. To me they are waaay more pragmatic than that, and if they decided to allow their stars to enlist together (something that isn't really done in idol culture), than they would make sure to get something in return. They worked JK very hard, and I think he took it because he had a specific goal (more like a person) in mind that he was willing to work for.

So, although we might be on the same wave with some of your thoughts, I don't fully agree with you.

I agree that they didn't know they would be enlisting together way back at the start of 2023.

I think that way back then they were still struggling with the realization that they will have to be enlisting. All the way back to the end of 2022, basically up to around the Busan concert, which was October 2022, they still held hope that some kind of arrangement could and would be found to allow for them not to enlist or to serve a shorter term. It was quite a conundrum for them, something I think most of them struggled with (and I say most because I do think that at least one of them did genuinely want to enlist) - on the one hand this is a life changing pretty scary thing (terrifying even - we saw how sad, and I will even say broken, JM was having to shave off his hair, and that was only a small part of it) they would have to do (joining the army is not a walk in the park, no pun intended), not to mention being in their prime, in the height of their success, having to part with the life they are accustomed to (professionally and personally), not being something they would necessarily want to do. And on the other hand you have that sense of commitment to the country and to their fellow Koreans, that have to face that same compulsory enlistment, adding the knowledge that not taking that path of enlistment could also come at a price. Like us, they knew that there were those that indeed believed they should be given an exemption, but at the same time many Koreans would have frowned upon it, and it's them that have to live among their people. Also, enlisting like any other SK young man would allow them more freedom in the future when it comes to voicing their opinions, as they had, like all others who had served their country fulfilling their duties. Criticisms of anything within a society you live in is easier to swallow when the person voicing said opinion is part of that society and enjoys not only the rights bestowed on those who live there, but has also fulfilled all required duties as well.

Long story short, end of 2022 the decision to enlist became a reality and Jin enlisting hit them all VERY hard. At that point I don't think they had a plan of enlistment just yet, although we do know from RM, for instance, that he was supposed to enlist with Hobi but ended up pushing back as he was busy working on his album and preferred not to lose the momentum.

And btw, hearing this from RM also teaches us that JM was never going to enlist so early on. And here I think our ways part when it comes to the continuation of your theory, because I do believe that JM's plan had ALWAYS been to stick around for JK's solo debut, whenever that would be. And I'll get back to it in a few...

JK was struggling start of 2023. What we got to see, starting with his lives in Feb 2023, him deleting his IG, was him pulling himself out of the pit he was in. Taking initiative and deleting his IG (which I will once again say was a big old F U to the company) and reaching out to us with his lives was JK becoming more active in getting better.

*Side note: I'm using the term getting better meaning pulling yourself out of a bad place you are in mentally (one that effects you physically as well).

Idk if starting the lives was a conscious decision on his part towards getting better, but I do believe that starting them was a key part in it.

Talking to us, sharing things with us, setting (at least trying to set) boundaries with his fans what is and is not acceptable on his part as an idol when it comes to fan behavior and interactions with him, doing it all in the most JK way, intelligently and respectfully.

JM was busy all the way from end of July 2023 through to the release of Face and until the end of his promotions. It's not that they weren't seeing each other or spending time together during this time. It's not that JM wasn't there for JK, as much as he could in the moment. It's very important to state this. But JK was struggling with everything. It's the hiatus, Jin's enlistment, their looming enlistment (the unknown of what will be with the two of them - separation for such a long time is something that both of them would find extremely hard to handle for so many reasons), the lack of direction, the lack of a structured timetable (JK is neuro divergent - there is zero doubt in my mind - if it's asd or adhd or a combination of the two, which in my mind is the most likely of them all). He was kind of lost and his anchor, JM, was not available in the way that he needed. Not JM's fault. Not JK's fault. It just was what it was, and JK was a little lost. It's natural for something like this to happen. I spoke about it quite a bit in my posts about his lives at the time. We saw RM was kind of lost for a while there too. The trick is to pick yourself up and pull yourself out of it (with help of others if necessary), and JK did, and JM was ecstatic to see him doing it. Those comments of his during JK's lives (we are talking about the lives during Feb-Mar 2023) were testimony to that.

Once again I can't seem to reign myself in and keep on point, lol.

So, where was I? Oh yes, they didn't know what will happen, but at the same time JM was not planning on enlisting earlier that year. Understand this: JM enlisting earlier would, to them, mean them being apart for not 18 months, but for 18 months plus. Plus the time between JM's enlistment and JK's enlistment. And plus the time from JM's discharge to JK's discharge. Even without JK's situation this was not something that they would want or agree on. Not to mention JK not only wanting JM around for his solo debut, but NEEDING him around for it. And it's not about being by his side 24/7, which he wasn't and he couldn't be. It's about being accessible. Being there to support him if he needed. Whenever he needed it. Being able to be with him for his first solo performance (this brings me close to another ask I received and am working on regarding JK's FIRST big solo performance). All this has to be within the limits of their glass closet (glass getting a little murky for their own liking since the end of 2021 all the way to the end of 2023), and the limits set by the powers of be (some of which JK very defiantly crossed). So yeah, JM was going to wait for JK's solo debut before enlisting.

As for enlisting together. That was something that was being assessed and in the works for several months. Something obviously kept quiet for good reason.

Was there a give and take with the company when it came to JK and the album? 100%. There were things he wanted, there were things they wanted, there were frogs that it being a first solo album he knew he would have to swallow.

Were some of these concessions given to allow the two more freedom, like allowing the 'travel show'? I do believe they were. Perhaps also prices paid (with Golden) for demands agreed upon in their new contracts. I can definitely see that happening.

The push for a full length album could be one of those, for example. JK was talking about a mini album even as late as mid July, and then it turned into a full length album. Could it have been the company pressuring him into it? Yes it could, as in the company wanting this. But JK is not one to cave in just because the company wants. So very possibly we had a bit of give and take going on here, and some of it most definitley would have had to do with allowances made for the two of them.

But at the same time I don't think it had anything to do with the joint enlistment. Not only don't I think that the company would have a say in it, legally or morally, but this wouldn't be something that either of them would stand for. So, in case I didn't make myself clear here, I will say it again - the company didn't use the possibility of joint enlistment as a tool to get something extra out of JK.

You talk about Hybe not being a company that will allow their artists to do as they wish. BTS belong to Big Hit, which is a subsidiary of Hybe. But Hybe would not have existed if not for BTS. BTS made BH what it is today and Hybe was built on their coat tails. And BTS, the members, they have enjoyed many freedoms within their company over the years. Not full freedom though. And Jikook, well they were allowed to be (while in other companies this was not allowed, couples forced apart or forced out). And not only were they allowed to be, but towards the end of 2020 there was movement towards normalizing their relationship, ear suck, hickey and all.

But then came Hybe and Hybe going public, and I knew the day that was announced that even though the members will get a huge payout this move will cost them freedoms they already had, because now there were shareholders and share prices to worry about, and when your band is the main bread winner for that company, well, as I mentioned, there is a price to pay. And they have been paying that price. The two of them for the 2 years prior to their enlistment. As long as they were under their old contracts they were bound by them. Which is why I feel like there will be changes coming when they are done with their MS and well into their new contracts. This will be freedom regarding their art (I think we can already see part of that with RM's new album) but also regarding their personal lives, in a sense of what they can or cannot show if they choose to. JK telling us he's human, telling us he loves us but he deserves to be happy, or even more needs to be happy to be able to create and perform and make us happy (you need to be especially dense if you don't understand that this also includes being in a relationship with another person, who may or may not be a member of his own band). This includes setting boundaries with their fans - yes they love them and feel indebted to them, but at the same time they need to stay in their own lane (I do think JK has been too nice at times setting these boundaries, while others like RM, Yoongi and Tae - a couple of times - were way blunter).

Once again, Hybe wouldn't have the right to 'allow' or 'disallow' them to enlist together. This would have been their decision and theirs alone. Hybe could talk about timing and what they would like to happen before or after, but not if it can or will happen. Hybe could like or dislike it, support it or not, but they would have no power over it. The military alone would have a say if to allow it or not, and at the end of the day we know how that one ended.

I also want to touch on another point.

Again.

Their choice to enlist together.

I've seen talk about Jikookers using the term NEED when it comes to the two of them - needing to be with one another to get through their military service, and I wanted to put in my two cents on this.

The way I think of it is that when people use the term need in that case it's not about saying that if they weren't allowed to enlist together they wouldn't have survived it. No. That isn't it. Not in my opinion, in any case.

These two young men are strong physically and mentally, and they would get through whatever was thrown their way (wouldn't be easy, I tell you that, but they would get through it). Chances are that if they wouldn't have gone down the path of enlisting together they could have landed a cushier placement, band perhaps, like NJ, who knows. But definitley the choice to do this together had a price tag to it, and their letters from Festa tell us as much as well (even though they obviously sugar coat it for us, but the sentiments are clear - it's hard).

So, they chose this. They knew this was going to be hard. A harder, more difficult, placement if they were to go down this path. And yet this was their choice!!

Why?

And here comes that NEED into play.

Yes, I do think that they needed this. They needed each other. They needed to not be separated for 18 months not knowing if and how often they could get to see each other or be together (maybe, if allowed, once in 3 months, and only if their units allowed the time off at the same time). They needed that person that they trusted and KNEW that would stand by their side, that would support them, be their rock, catch them when they fall, be by their side in their time of need, just like they always have been.

They are each other's PERSON. The one that would ALWAYS be there through good and bad.

They both put it down in words:

JM

And JK

Shock, awe... I must be one of those delusional Jikookers that believe JK's lyrics were not describing his relationship with us, the fans. Another song written for the one person they love, yet given as a gift to Army.

And in his very subtle but intelligent way, he told us that himself:

"Even when I was working on the song, I really wanted to release it as a fan song".

Just like JM did, eh?

Would it be too hard to just say : "I wrote this song for my fans"? He chose not to, didn't he? Once again we have choices here.

I digress.

You could replace NEED with WANT, if you will. Same same in this case, imo. Seeing how hard they fought to find their way to this exact point.

The first, the only idols to ever do this!!

Bottom line:

To me, using the term NEED in this context is not about them not being able to make it otherwise, but more about a choice made to have that person they feel closest to, the person that has since forever been their emotional anchor, the person that lifted them up when they fell, the person that stood by them, cared for them, supported them when they were struggling. The person that KNEW them to the core and would be there by their side to get through this together with.

Each other.

[jeffrrandell]

Explanation for the connection I made lol 👇

I'm gonna at least slightly explain Tord and Gravy being roommates. I'm not going to lie to you guys, this was a joke made because when my friends and I were watching "Technical Foul" from 8 Crazy Nights we were like "that's like if Tord crashed at Gravys house tbh" and then it turned into "Tord somehow becomes Gravys roommate after he leaves Edds house, for like maybe 2-3 years. And it's almost like a Disney movie. Tords just happy he has a place to stay, and he knows Gravy is just soooooo nice but man is he annoying. So he's not mean to him, he just is autistic and only ever likes Edd anyway basically. But he warms up to em. Gravy works a ton of jobs, and Tord cleans up around the house. And an odd but actually important detail is Gravy smokes weed (because of all of these jobs), and Tord took interest in that. Getting high together kinda made it easier for his nerves to be calmed down, and it made it easier for him to realize "oh Gravy is just a guy". Of course afterwards, Gravy turns back to jumpy goofy Gravy, but Tord learned to appreciate the energy. Tord and Blonzie were already slight acquaintances, actually before Tord met Gravy. Somehow for whatever reason Tord ends up at the auto shop he works at, probably asked about a pile of spare parts that looked like junk and Blonzie said "take em". So they had that for a while. They're mechanically intelligent together. Plus Tord finds his stunts REALLY cool, as he loves destruction too. He'd love to invent little things for him to try out. They also both have "I'm gonna be silent now" autism. Anyway, he never in his life expected for Gravy to be like "meet my boyfriend" and "oh whataya know, it's the guy that calls me Tiny and gives me spare parts". Not sure if it makes sense for Tord to still be living with Gravy when he gets with Blonzie or not, but either way they'd make a really weird fun trio. Gravy definitely opened up Tords weird side for him. Because Tord is just so closeted around everyone, even Edd didn't know a few secrets about him (for probably crush related reasons, intimidation.) But with Gravy, it sorta didn't matter to him what he told him. He'd listen, and I mean it's sad but. Gravys a huge loser who's pushed around EVERYDAY, and for a bit Tords view on that was "well he has it worse than I do so he can't judge me"

But yeah, they're friends lol

In a WTFuture timeline, this was also a joke that turned out to be something that we all kinda liked. I believe in Tord clone theory btw! Basically one day, Not Tord shows up to Gravys house one day. Reminder that if this is a bad timeline, Blonzie is dead sorry. But yeah Gravy notices something is off about him. Very off. Like, somehow this Tord knows Gravy would call him "buddy" buuut.. Tord never called HIM "buddy". Blah blah blah somehow Gravy is in the Red Army. And I don't mean as a soldier, the last thing Tord wants is for him to die actually. As in any timeline, Gravy will work a million jobs. And that's exactly what he does. I'm talking coffee runs and goofy shit like that. Because to me, yeah Red Leader is "WOAAHH crazy leader man scary he's taking over the world" but it's EDDSWORLD, so he's also "aw man. My helmet stinky" "play just dance with me I'm bored" like y'know. Before this concept, I was like "yup. Gravy is the first to die in this timeline" and then it turned into "Tord wants to keep him alive because he'd be dead bored without him"

And I'm serious it's gets so goofy. To a point where THIS Tord also opens up to Gravy, crying about Edd and being like "I'LL JUST GET RID OF ALL THE COKE IN THE WORLD I CANT LOOK AT IT ANYMORE!!" and then he's like "😲💡" and then Gravy talks about his feelings too.

Potentially as well, since Gravy is trained in medical, he could also technically take care of wounded soldiers and almost act as a doctor but ONLY back at headquarters, he's not allowed to go anywhere he'd be in danger. Anyways. Yup. My sick and twisted mind.

[doubleslashkarma]

the doors were fucking crazy guys

SOOOOO a lot of shit happened in Lukey's stream today regarding Keeper lore and such, and I have. Theories. HUGE ramble under the cut

Though we already suspected, it's pretty much confirmed that Lukey was a scientist even in his past life, which tracks. He was experimenting with something, and whatever his research was, the Keepers want it desperately.

This is where Aimsey comes in, because one of the things the Keeper (?) said during the conversation in... The Null? I guess? Was:

S--l-... there's not many words that would fit into that scheme, and I can't help but notice that "Skulk" is one of them. Combined with the text that appeared on his Memory Fragments later in the stream:

"They were the ones who doubted my research... And now they need me..."

It seems the most likely story to me is that Lukey found a cure, or something similar, to the Corruption while studying skulk (I don't know what other use researching skulk might have). The Keepers KNOW he did, and want his help eradicating it entirely, but Lukey obviously doesn't remember, which leads to this weird back and forth where this... Keeper (?) asks for information that he doesn't have.

There's also the fact that this time, "Keeper" was put into question. The implications there that whatever is talking to Lukey is NOT a Keeper, but something pretending to BE one, is also a terrifying possibility that I don't really know what to do with. I don't know what else it could be. I'd want to say just a memory, but he comes away with physical proof of the interaction, so I don't think these are all elaborate hallucinations. I think. Who knows.

I have a lot of thoughts about how Corruption and skulk are tied to memory- the way players who have gone through The Maddening don't remember who they used to be, time sickness, and the fact that skulk collects exp. It would make sense, then, if the corruption is the erosion of memories then the skulk would be the preservation of such. However this schema in mind opens up some interesting avenues for talking about Lukey's memory loss.

This whole thing reopens Keeper!Lukey theory a bit, which I had previously totally disregarded. If he found a cure, it's possible that the cure cost him his memories, which would mean that he could've in fact been a half-corrupted player at some point. I'm tentatively putting that one back on the table.

However, I'm not subscribing to it. I still think the Keeper's language with him implies an "otherness" from the Keepers- the fact they were surprised to learn he knew the name of The Null, and the increasingly obvious fact that his freedom seems to be... conditional, to say the least.

There's also the fact that Stultus, Owen's Keeper friend, was so surprised and suspicious of the fact Lukey is connected to The Null. It seems like whatever "side" he's on, it's a different "side" than the Keepers who live in The Null. (It also opens the possibility that Stultus is on team Corruption, which would be interesting. The fact he said Lukey needs to "pick a side" implies so much yet says so little.)

This is more a bunch of random thoughts put together than anything but I feel like I'm going insane with the red string board over here lmfao

[aakaneeee]

well people. . It's time, aka Akane's monthly revival because there's Luka content. And gosh do I have a lot to say about this. Except.. I'm not going to market these as theories, but as predictions. I think as an og fan I've seen enough to be this confident in my abilities LOL

Quickly, I'd like to address the lyrics and the title, because I will reference it later and I don't want to have to explain mid-prediction.

Wiege has two meanings, and both are so fitting:

1. Cradle. It feels.. perfect, for me. It makes so much sense. Luka was a cold child.. but I'd like to say only physically. I feel like he genuinely warmed up towards Hyuna and Hyunwoo as a child. And I'm going to bring an idea that might get me a bit of backlash but.. I've gotten worse, and that is, that Hyuna is at fault for Luka's approach on his feelings. (Audience boos) From the little we know about Hyunwoo, I feel like Hyuna treated both him and Luka.. at least a little bit similarly. Or at least, Luka couldn't discern a difference, if there was any. Luka is a tube baby, he probably doesn't know (and I am not babying him here, I'd like to add!) what "siblings" he has. For him, affection might just be all and the same. Yes, it wasn't Hyuna's responsibility to teach him, but I feel like a hint was there "Your life is mine", and she could've explained, in a way. But, back to our discussion, Hyuna was Luka's cradle. She burns as bright as the sun, while he's colder. But most importantly, she was his only true friend (Considering I don't think his relationship with Hyunwoo was extremely close, even though they were 'friends'), someone he thought truly cared about him. Hyuna was Luka's cradle, holding him close, comfortable... until at one point, he outgrows that cradle (Hyunwoo's death).

And the second meaning, beginning. In the picture we got, Luka is centered, he's in the middle.. but he's so small, and overshadowed by the tree. Luka is the best performer of the ANAKT, always first, but has no friends. But perhaps, he was better that way. Then, Hyuna comes, and it's a new beginning. He's finally not alone. What I've noticed in the new banner, Luka is missing, but across the tree trunk, in his place, is a taller shadow. Perhaps, a shadow of who Luka was, hopefully still left in there. Or, the other way around, it symbolizes his real self being left there.

And the lyrics:

When I close my eyes,

Play in paradise.

These, to me, remind me of the interview where Luka said his favorite game was hide and seek. In a way, his whole ANAKT life was a game of hide and seek: hiding all the time, but no one trying to seek him. Until Hyuna did, and found him. Something that intrigues me is the "paradise", which to me sounds like what Mizi once said: Dying in competition means returning to the Great Anakt, which I suppose is to them like Heaven.. or Paradise. This will be important later, so remember it.

And now, my predictions for the HyuLuka episode

! First of all, I think the song will be lullaby-like. When I first saw this teaser, with the lyrics, as weird as it sounds, it reminded me of Richard's song in The Hero in TAWOG, a song that always gets me to cry for some reason, and I've been really stuck on that . It would be interesting, because it would fit Luka's voice (as does everything else), but probably not Hyuna's, even though 6FU; would eat it.. which to me, sounds like their "love", where Luka loves her, but it isn't returned. I'd love to see more German in it than just in the title. And considering the nostalgic, pastel, very cutesy artstyle (that reminds me of the memory part from Jordan River animation!), it seems very viable. But the art style is also noisy, which gives an unsettling vibe. It feels like a 2020's dreamcore wallpaper.

I might be crazy, but the hand holding the flower (with only 3 stamens, like the 3 friends) looks dark-skinned, like it would be Hyuna's or Hyunwoo's, but I doubt it would be his, considering it's the account's profile picture. If this is some kind of reference to.. perhaps, an unrequited Hyuluka but the other way around, with Hyuna still not over Luka.. probably won't happen, but God, would that be awesome.

So, how do I think the round will go?

First of all, I have to say, I'm not sure if this will be a round or a Mizisua type episode.😭 I'd say "oh the wait time is way too small" but also... do you guys remember the production announcement of Round 7? Yeah. You can never be sure.

This isn't necessarily a prediction, but more of a suggestion of what could be: It would be SO cool if it would be both.. in a way, merged. This idea just appeared in my mind and I was like OH. MY. GOD. Imagine if almost the whole thing was just them, as children, having fun, a whole backstory.. but then, when Hyunwoo dies, it pans on his face, and then it's back on stage, the loser's face instead of his. It would be so heartwarming, and then DEEPLY DISTURBING and traumatizing. I also really want some Luka and Heperu backstory so I can hate Heperu even more.

On the topic of the loser... It's going to be Luka. I'm an insane Luka lover and it was hard to get accommodated to this idea, but there is no way that he will survive. First of all, the shadow in the account's banner, in place of Luka. It's implications... are quite obvious. Second, the pattern of characters shown in Sweet Dream, and he is next. Third: "In my arms, you would be protected." I feel like Luka would consider the competition "In his arms". I don't think he would break his promise: hear me out for a second. He wouldn't let Hyuna die this way, because I feel like his sense of possession over her also comes with responsibility and protectiveness. And fourth, the Paradise lyric, to me, is a foreshadowing of his death.

I also think he will die by self sacrifice. First of all, there's no way Hyuna could defeat Luka by pure odds. Yes, her stats are better, but lets be honest, her mental power would NOT be as good infront of Luka, and also, the aliens wouldn't vote her. She's a rebel, wanted for so much time, with technically no guardian: they wouldn't want her to defeat their prince, probably. And second, I have made two categories:

The "perfects": Sua, Ivan, Luka

The "rebels": Mizi, Till, Hyuna

See something similar? Both the perfects that are dead, have died by self-sacrifice. The only other dead character, Till, has been shot while reaching for his freedom, so you can't say this is for all characters. And let's be honest.. Patterns are usually being followed in this series. Id also like to add, even though it's a reach, that in a tier of how 'perfect' they are, it'd be:

1. Luka

2. Sua - not so obvious self sacrifice

3. Ivan - obvious self sacrifice

So, I'd say that Luka's might be even more backstage, as if to sabotage himself in a way that seems viable. It also kind of goes in line with his character, he's not one to break facade on stage.

I think this episode will be quite a deep-dive into their true selves. We know the least about them, so this will be GREAT. I'd love to see a more morally gray Hyuna in this. (Since I'm genuinely kind of tired of only Luka being villainized in the ship, which honestly..  is kind of in line with the other perfects. Let's let Mizi, Till and Hyuna be little freaks too) I also want to see atleast a little bit of Hyunwoo, like a little snippet of his mind, what he saw in Luka.

In conclusion, I'm SO happy and hyped about this HyuLuka episode, they're so mysterious and I really really want to see more of L- I mean, more of them. Getting 2 episodes where Luka is present one after another is literally THE dream to me. Basically, Wiege is killing me and I'm gladly letting it.

@4listr Since you asked to be tagged and also, @rockwgooglyeyes I REALLY want your opinion on this

[codenamethebird]

Ok here's a little (not really) analysis/theory post about Hades 2, because I'm obsessed. Its consumed all my thoughts. And I need to talk about a theme I think will (hopefully) be addressed as the game progresses.

Here's some examples of dialogue that starts to touch on this conflict between mortals and the gods. What exactly do mortals deserve? We also have literal Icarus "flew too close to the sun" here too (and probably Pandora). Chronos was able to sway many to his side with a promise of a golden age without the gods, which is presented by the narrative as a foolish venture. And not saying it isn't, or that Chronos is the secret good guy here, but I believe Chronos is taking advantage of a very real hurt that exists for mortals.

This line from Nemesis really stood out to me, because it implies that while mortals have a concept of evil, the gods don't. Which sounds ridiculous but the more you think about it makes total sense. The gods in Hades (and just greek myth in general), are kind of the worst. They are petty and selfish, they literally attack you if their boon isn't picked first, and most vitally in this context, often utterly disregard mortals.

For example, one of the things that drove me a little crazy in Hades 1, was how chill everyone was with Demeter's never ending winter. Demeter was killing possibly millions upon millions of mortals and everyone else just sort of let it happen. Maybe complained a bit because it was annoying to them, but just stood by. And that's just one example. Mortal's have a very valid reason to hate the gods.

And considering we have more areas of the surface to explore that aren't out yet, I have a feeling Melinoë is going to be meeting some of these discontent mortals. And my hope is they are going to be nuanced characters, that will challenge Melinoë not just in a fight, but her very ideals.

Because Melinoë is very deferential to the gods, waaaaaay more that Zag ever was. Unlike Zag, who was more like a bro to them and was willing to suck up to them for personal gain, Melinoë seems to genuinely mean all the respect she gives them. She praises them, defends them when they are insulted, and just generally very polite to them.

In a smaller scale, she describes Hypnos as having a wisdom about him and can somehow sense her intensions while asleep. Which as Nem implies, the version in Melinoë's head doesn't exactly line up with reality (though sidebar, I am a believer in Chekov's Hypnos and that he's going to somehow save the day and put Chronos in a never ending sleep or something, but that's beside the point haha).

Melinoë's reverence to the gods makes total sense of course. She was denied her family and a happy childhood, and because of that has glorified them all in her head. The Olympians are sending her vital aid on her holy mission for vengeance and to save her family, even as their own home is being attacked, how honorable of them!

And I think part of Melinoë's arc is that perfect picture of them breaking into pieces. Yes, they are the better of the two options between them and Chronos, but that doesn't mean they aren't also kind of the worst. That mortals deserve better than frivolous gods that can decide on a whim their fates for better or worse (love u Moros but I'm still fucked up over you and your sisters giving mortals horrible doom endings when you were bored. At least he feels bad now but still. Perfect example of gods even when not intending to having horrific consequences for mortals). And maybe like how Zag healed relations with his family, Melinoë can start repairing relations between the Gods and Mortals.

[starsainzjr]

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x singer!reader Faceclaim: Hwang Yeji Requested: Yes No

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yourusername Shanghai, China

Liked by bingbing_fan, j.m, lewishamilton and 723,911 others

yourusername My favorite tour stop! Thank you for such a warm welcome Shanghai! Can't wait to see you tomorrow night!

View all 100,639 comments

bingbing_fan Such an incredible show! You're an amazing amazing performer YN, cannot wait for tomorrow night

yourusername You're so sweet, thank you! bingbing_fan Thank you for the tickets!

j.m Cannot wait to play with you next week.

yourusername Going to be an incredible show!

jiminsmints I still refuse to believe I managed to get tickets for this concert it's going to be legendary

ynyln_fans Seriously! It's actually insane we're going to get to see them on the same stage

l.h.eight Lewis???? What are you doing here?????

lewismylove I feel like my worlds have collided. I had no idea he was an YN fan

forzalewis My fangirl Twitter senses are tingling

lewishamilton

Liked by mercedesamgf1, mission44, yourusername and 692,211 others

lewishamilton Shootout done and dusted. Good result, starting P3. Excited to see what we can do tomorrow.

View all 162,922 comments

mercedesamgf1 Huge result! Looking forward to the rest of the weekend 👊

f1 Absolutely legendary performance out there once again

silverarrows44 Merc come back 👀

redbullsroad No. No. I like the energy tho silverarrows44 No you're right I'm delulu

l.h.eight Oh so this what the Red Bull and Ferrari fans are feeling this season

forzalewis Just give it a season, you'll feel better silverarrows44 No don't remind me 😭

ynyln_fans YN?? What are you doing here???

forzalewis Maybe my theory isn't that crazy after all...

yourusername Shanghai, China

Liked by bingbing_fan, j.m, lewishamilton and 739,228 others

yourusername Night one! What an incredible performance in front of an even more incredible crowd. Thank you so much, Shanghai!

View all 109,226 comments

bingbing_fan Amazing show, just like I thought it would be. And an amazing performer!

yourusername Always love having you in my crowd! Thank you for coming!

j.m Just half of what's coming. Can't wait to bring it tomorrow night

yourusername It's going to be absolutely legendary!

ynyln_fans I still refuse to believe this is going to happen. And that it's tomorrow night. And that I'm going

jiminsmints You and me both 😭 jiminsmints It's easily going to be the best night of my life

forzalewis Lewis in the likes again. Let my man cook

l.h.eight I'm invested in this now. Less painful than whatever it is that's going on on the track

mercedesamgf1 China

Liked by lewishamilton, georgerussell63, yourusername and 561,229 others

mercedesamgf1 Sprint day. Let's do this

View all 90,283 comments

georgerussell63 Admin do I still get the candy you promised me

mercedesamgf1 Yes but you actually need to leave me alone and go get in your car in order to make that happen silverarrows44 Merc admin is getting progressively more unhinged and I honestly love it. I'm here for it, I support them

l.h.eight Lewis always looks amazing. I love this man

mercedesamgf1 We love him too silverarrows44 At least someone does l.h.eight Oop-

ynyln_fans YN liking the team posts?? 🤨

forzalewis Postpone the grippy sock vacation maybe I'm not delusional

yourusername and j.m Shanghai, China

Liked by j.m, bingbing_fan, lewishamilton and 891,243 comments

yourusername Absolute favorite night of the tour this far. Without a doubt. Thank you so much @/j.m for playing with me and giving such an incredible show to everyone who came out!

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j.m Thank you for inviting me. Could not have wished for a better night. Can't wait to do it again

yourusername The loudest I've ever heard a crowd. We're absolutely teaming up again soon!

jiminsmints I don't have a voice

jiminsmints I screamed so loud when he popped up and just straight up appeared through the smoke

jiminsmints I really don't have a voice

ynyln_fans Neither do I but that was easily the best night of my life. Hands down

forzalewis GUYS

forzalewis THIS IS NOT A DRILL

f1wags Shanghai, China

Liked by 30,118

f1wags This photo was captured by @/lewlewlemons and posted about by @/forzalewis on Twitter. The photo was taken outside the venue for YN YLN's second show in Shanghai where she performed with Jimin. Several other fans have posted about interactions with Lewis at the concert and have said that they saw him dancing and singing along in his private box at the venue. Are we going to see another WAG in the paddock soon?

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lewlewlemons He was the sweetest person ever. He was in a rush but still paused to take a picture with me when he saw my hat

f1wags We've always heard that he's a wonderful person to meet!

forzalewis I would look to point out that my theories were not unfounded and do in fact that traction. Just for the record so no one calls me insane

ynyln_fans Yeah this is allowed. I like Lewis, we can have Lewis

yourusername Shanghai, China

Liked by bingbing_fan, j.m, lewishamilton and 800,119 others

yourusername Last night of performances and a bit of entertainment for before the show. Thank you so much to everyone who came out to see me and @/j.m perform. It really means the world

View all 112,304 comments

j.m I've only ever seen you get excited like that over racing

yourusername Can you blame me? My team is having a good weekend

mercedesamgf1 Superstars of different worlds 🤩

yourusername Oh my god this is the best day of my life mercedesamgf1 Check your inbox! We hope to see you tomorrow! j.m I'm not even in the building anymore and I heard her scream

ynyln_fans She's just like me fr

forzalewis OH MY GOD ITS HAPPENING

lewlewlemons STAY CALM. STAY F*CKING CALM

yourusername posted a story

yourusername

Liked by j.m, lewishamilton, mercedesamgf1 and 582,034 others

yourusername One of the best weekends ever. Thank you so much @/mercedesamgf1, I can't wait to come back!

View all 129,339 comments

j.m I am never going to hear the end of this, am I?

yourusername Nope! You're lucky I'm not dragging you along with me to be entirely honest. j.m Truly a miracle

mercedesamgf1 It was a pleasure having you, happy to be able to give you such a good result! You might just be our good luck charm!

yourusername Count me in for next weekend then!

ynyln_fans I'm living for her F1 girlie era

l.h.eight She's gonna look amazing in red, just saying

lewlewlemons I'm crying it's about time Lewis gets someone good for him. They're both so sweet

forzalewis Okay, okay. Just because they're lining up does not mean they're dating. But....

lewishamilton

Liked by mercedesamgf1, yourusername and 628,025 others

lewishamilton Great feeling to be back on the podium. Let's keep it rolling into Miami.

View all 201,188 comments

mercedesamgf1 What a drive!

silverarrows44 So this is what Red Bull and Ferrari fans have been feeling all season. It's nice, I like it

l.h.eight I feel as though we can't get used to it unfortunately silverarrows44 No but we can really enjoy the feeling of it right? For now?

yourusername Thank you for an incredible show! Can't wait to be back!

lewishamilton Thank you for an amazing show too! It's only fair. See you next weekend! lewlewlemons Good fucking bye

lewlewlemons They're probably not even together yet and I'm already willing to give my life for them

forzalewis Let's just ponder the YN and Roscoe content we have the potential to receive

l.h.eight You do have a point there

yourusername Miami, Florida

Liked by j.m, lewishamilton, mercedesamgf1, and 799,292 others

yourusername Welcome to the weekend @/mercedesamgf1

View all 181,833 comments

mercedesamgf1 Let's get it started!

yourusername Cannot wait for this!

j.m Am I ever going to hear the end of this?

yourusername Nope! And you're already signed on for touring next year, no backing out of it now j.m I'm pretty sure you weren't supposed to say anything about that yet yourusername 🤷‍♀️

ynyln_fans I don't know what to freak out about first. The fact that we're getting more YN and Mercedes content this weekend, or whatever the hell they just revealed up above

forzalewis That's a very good point. I, for one, am paralyzed right now

lewlewlemons The day that Lewis makes an appearance in these posts is the day I die

forzalewis Real

yourusername posted two stories...

yourusername Miami, Florida

Liked by lewishamilton, j.m and 900,294 others

yourusername Nothing to see here, just hopping a flight with the most recent race winner

Comments on this post have been limited

j.m So that's what the screaming I heard was

yourusername I HAVEN'T STOPPED WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

lewishamilton All thanks to my good luck charm

yourusername Look what you've done. I'm blushing now lewishamilton Then come over here and lemme fix it

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All photos from Pinterest, Instagram, or Google Images

[lightningonatether]

Why c!endersmile were actually friends

ALTERNATIVELY TITLED: my crazy thesis on two bad bitches with not a single moment of screentime fueled purely by my own insanity

ALTERNATIVELY alternatively titled: to all loreheads please be nice i dont usually lorepost. feel free to engage though

So my return is courtesy of litchi, who mentioned c!endersmile like once a month ago, and got me thinking about them so hard I couldn't just walk away.

Namely, litchi reminded me of a few theories I have concerning c!endersmiles relationship, that I developed back when i was watching the SMP live. This might make my recollection of some events a little fuzzy, but everything should be canon compliant cause I was thinking about all this as I watched.

I was already watching ranboo pretty regularly at the point the prison arc started, I cant resist a really weird guy with horrible debilitating anxiety. I already thought the whole hearing dreams voice in his head was really interesting, but as the prison arc evolved it became clear that ranboos relationship with dream wasnt just some hallucination inside ranboos head and actually had some substance.

My theory really started to develop into what it is now with the explosions on the prison roof which led to the lockdown and tommys death; these were confirmed to be set by ranboo in his enderwalk state. He was one of the only people online at the time, ranboo found tnt in his inventory afterwards, and I think dream also told sam he knew ranboo did it at some point, although I can't find the exact stream.

At that point it was obvious that enderwalking ranboo held a different set of beliefs, alliances, and likely more memories than the "awake" ranboo we saw most of the time on streams, and was acting against amnesiac ranboos wishes. The explosions above the prison along with the reveal that ranboo had been regularly visiting dream in prison confirmed that dream and ender!ranboo were some sort of allies.

At the time, my assumption was that ranboo had simply made an attempted prison break. It wouldnt be a stretch to assume, if ranboo had visited regularly, that he would have noticed the poor conditions and tried to break his ally out. However, after the confirmation of the staged finale, and a better look at cdreams motivations(wanting to provide protection for punz, separating himself very publicly from his only known ally to keep them safe) the idea that enderwalk ranboo, an ally of dreams, would go against dreams explicit wishes to stay locked in that prison began making less sense.

It would only make sense if either:

enderwalk never knew about the plan or

enderwalk knew about the plan but went against it anyway

1 is a very tempting explanation. c!dream rarely lets anyone close. even punz, who knew the plan intimately, wasn't aware of dreams true motivations to bring the server back to a peaceful time before conflict. but..... it didnt sit right with me.

Two reasons for this: I know some people may have stopped watching/never watched ranboo lore, but towards the end of the prison arc, ranboo began seeing flashes of "lessons" appear on screen. These lessons all had that utilitarian and paranoid feel a lot of dreams actions/reasoning have, like "dont trust anybody"(paraphrasing, thats just what i remember the core of that message being) or "never hesitate to gain a favor from someone, you can use it to get something from them later". anyone remember technos favor to dream? It was heavily implied these lessons were meant to be from dream, directed at c!enderwalk. This would mean the two spent a significant amount of time together. not only that, dream was sharing his *life philosophy* with ender!ranboo. thats not just something dream would share with anyone, and implies a close allyship at the least. its almost like he was teaching a pupil. yeah, sure, some of his lessons were a little fucked up and weird in that dream sort of way, but he was looking out for the kid. and it seems that enderwalk wasnt hesitant to act on those lessons either. he promised to keep a shulker safe for foolish, gaining a favor, and didnt sign a single one of those prison visitation waivers, on top of sam discovering they were corrupted into enderian when he checked LMAO.

This alone would be enough to persuade me enderwalk HAD to have been let in on the plan, at least so he wouldnt cause any problems (such as trying to get his ally out of prison).

but the other reason is... ranboos stated philosophy against conflict. he doesnt like sides, he wishes they wouldn't exist. I remember watching a stream and nearly jumping out of my seat when he told chat he just wished the server could just be one big happy family! because that is nearly word for word what a bunch of loreheads were saying about dreams motivations at the time(and now obviously lmao). if we keep in mind their contact for those "lessons", ranboos visits to dream in prison, AND the fact that dreams and ranboos motivations coincide on a level even Above dream and punzs(punz seemed to have been unaware of and also not particularly motivated by dreams wish for peace) i cant really imagine dream not letting this guy in on the plan.

which leaves us with 2) ranboo tried to break dream out against dreams wishes.

Maybe ranboo was just an ally and chickened out after he saw dreams mistreatment in prison and went against the plan, but... dream missed him after sam barred him from visiting. he asked sapnap to deliver a note to ranboo(just a smiley face, likely with the hopes of triggering an enderwalk) despite fearing for his ally punz enough to lock himself in prison. it feels reminicent to how dream sounds when he comments on george not visiting him once. like he missed a friend despite trying so hard to separate himself from the ones he'd had.

Maybe ranboo tried to break in because he saw a friend being mistreated, and couldn't leave the plan stand.

And that kind of makes sense doesn't it? that dream, someone whos paranoid about how peoples connection to him puts them in danger, would choose an amnesiac who spends most of their time terrified of dream, and wouldnt remember any of his plans or their friendship to use against either of them in the first place?

[lukolabrainrot]

For me it seems obvious that if N was to bring anyone who is not obviously work related and especially L, today all everyone would be talking about would be her relationship. SM, gossip mongers and everyone in between, would completely dismiss HER ACHIEVEMENTS and make it about a man. Bridgerton has become a BIG pop culture moment and them getting together would become a huge one as well, especially after leading the most successful season as a romantic couple. If they already were a public couple with craziness of the first days calmed down and a few public appearances, then yes he would be seen as just a supportive partner. For now though it would be nothing but complete shift of attention from her to them, him. So it actually makes sense for her to walk red carpet on her own.

I understand why people are tired of all the teasing most of us are excited on their behalf, but let’s not forget it is not our lives, it is theirs, and they are real people who will move on their own pace, as they should. Where is all that patience we have all been talking about? If only we would stop getting impatient trying to prove some point, pay attention to N/L only, dismissing all the unnecessary noise, and stop getting triggered every time we see them hanging out with people other then each other or not give us the information we want on OUR timeline I think we will get good news much sooner.

They have indeed been playfully teasing us, I think because they are not quite ready to the intensity of attention they will receive when it becomes public knowledge (I mean they went through WT they can imagine what to expect) but they know that there are people who are excited and eager for a possibility of them together, so they give us little clues and hints that that might indeed be happening. I also think they underestimated the insanity of some of this fandom because instead of accepting what we are given and being quietly excited for them, they got angry about their narrative not being proven correct when someone else invaded her privacy to prove theirs’. I fear that might force them into quiet and we will get absolutely nothing from here. If past few months prove anything it’s that if they didn’t wish us to we would know 💩. I mean… where indeed IS L, we have not seen him (except for a blurry reflection and his hands) for months, 🤨 all we have is because they wished us to have it.

I remain hopeful for now that my first theory of those crumbs might be correct, which is that now with all this publicity out of the way for N (hopefully) they will get on set for BRT, and with security of closed set as well as supportive people around them will feel comfortable sharing their news while having an ability to be out of the public eye during the initial, inevitable insanity such news will cause. If I were in their position I would have acted like that, but again it is I, they will do things their way, so we should just sit down and wait patiently. And you know what? After past few days of public whiplash I kind of feel hopeful, good things usually come when you least expect them.

Ps. I am kind of shocked at my positivity, usually I am much more pessimistic.

I love this positivity Anon!!

I think I just had expectations for this trip (and you know what they say about expectations lol).

I think I just needed to touch some grass and remember to be patient and know that I don't actually know these people. When they want us to know, we will...

[uhoh23]

Person A - I think he's a Wanderer

Person B - DEMON

Me - THE DRAGON KING HAS ARISEN MY BRETHREN

NGL I was originally leaning more towards the demon theory bc there's a lot of evidence for it, but the problem that I have with the demon theory is that it now feels TOO obvious, like the devs are trolling like how they joked about him being a vampire. All three main theories make sense tho - demon, wanderer, or dragon.

There's so many demon implications - 1. The N109 zone being a lawless place that apparently has little sunlight, hence why there doesn't seem to be many plants, making it sound like the underworld bc the underworld probably wouldn't have much life in it, its another version of Hell. 2. Sylus' flower is the Datura, sometimes known as the "Devil's Trumpet." 3. Demons love deals. They trick humans and according to Christian lore, hate humanity. Sylus enjoys using people, even with the good in him. He's always trying to get something.

Point is, it kinda seems TOO on the nose...but the dragon theory is less obvious for me. I would have NEVER thought he was one until I did my research on Chinese mythology 🤣 AND BOY DID I FIND some INTERESTING things. Let's start with the most IMPORTANT point - In Eastern mythology, dragons can shapeshift between human and dragon. There's TWO dragons in particular that stood out to me - Fuzanglong and Longwang.

Fuzanglong - Dragons of hidden treasure. They live underground and hide gemstones, golden nuggets, their most prized possession a magic pearl. Has horns, demonic looking eyes, and dark red is associated with them. Sometimes known as "Keeper of the Underworld." They can cause volcanic eruptions when awoken or when they leave the underground. Elusive to humans.

Sylus and the color red go hand in hand. Couple that with the "treasure" talk that reminds me of Nightplumes due to Sylus saying "A man's heart goes to where his treasure is." Just like a dragon protecting his treasure. Sylus also enjoys gifting MC gems as a gift 🥺 There's also that scene where it looks like MC is underground, blood on her hands, and lava seeping through the ground. This ties to the volcano aspect and the underground aspect of this particular dragon.

The Dragon King - IT GETS WILDER. A guy named Longwang could shapeshift from dragon to human at will. He was the source of rain. His human form had red eyes and his dragon form typically had red scales, but some artists would opt for other colors. Longwang was the king of all dragons, immortal, and eventually he became a God in the story of the Lotus Sutra. His dragon form had wings, claws, and horns. He had four dragon brothers who could also shapeshift, lived in a luxurious palace in the sea, and he ate gems. Longwang was benevolent usually, but he was known to have a bad temper and be intimidating. He also apparently had thousands of kids 🤣

Sylus - has red eyes, he's intimidating to most, gets annoyed easily with most, can't die (or so he claims), the gems thing again, and he's rich. He very well could be a God with his crazy healing abilities and apparent immortality. The Lost Oasis card specifically brings up God's and Longwang played a significant role in a Chinese literature piece called Investiture of God's.

Last, but not least, Sylus' zodiac sign...I find it FUNNY how COINCIDENTALLY this man is an Aries in the Western zodiac, yet in the Chinese zodiac the Aries equivalent? IS A DRAGON. Just search up "Aries in the Chinese zodiac" 💀🫣 The devs did their zodiac homework bc Sylus has MANY of the Aries traits, so who's to say they didn't purposely choose Aries due to it's ties with the Dragon zodiac?

Aries Traits - love the chase in romance and they view crushes as a conquest to conquer, domineering, competitive and hate losing, adventurous, natural leaders, very straightforward, dominant. Dragon Zodiac - natural leaders, adventurous, very straightforward, competitive, can be arrogant, impatient, impulsive 👀🤣 Granted, maybe none of this proves he's a dragon, but I think this stuff is super interesting nonetheless 🖤

[anderscim]

✦ a really old minitheory about jax that had been left in my drafts for nearly a year

title is pretty self-explanatory.

// spoilers for the pilot episode of TADC

so, this is actually an old theory that i had created back when the pilot first came out—but i decided that it’s worth sharing now. basically, it summarizes what i think could possibly be a reason behind our favorite rabbitoid’s behavior.

take everything with a grain of salt. (^^)

this might sound like a weird place to start from, but i swear there’s a line of thinking behind it—what could be some of the reasons that a character abstracts?

at the very least, we know for sure that abstraction occurs if a character’s mental state entirely collapses—which could happen for a myriad of reasons. mental breakdown, existential crisis, you name it.

however, the most important effect that comes with abstraction is that they completely lose their sense of identity—which is also shown externally with the abstracted character’s appearance.

this led me to think that a possible reason for abstraction could also play into identity—whether that’s losing it, somehow messing with it one way or another, or, in a crazy scenario, doing something (aka recovering original memories, for example) that would cause them to clash with their current identity. things like that. obviously there’s some very strong theories out there as to what could also be other reasons for abstracting, but for now i’ll stick with the simpler explanations.

okay, but what does this have to do with jax?

basically, i needed to set up the previous context in order to be able to explain a possible reason for jax’s… jacka$$ery. yeah. that works.

as far as i can tell, it looks like he’s essentially being mean to everyone else just for the sake of it. from (allegedly) placing a centipede in ragatha’s room, to constantly bullying gangle, to pretty much every snide comment in general—it seems that he’s completely cemented his role as the “mean guy” of the series. but what if that was his goal?

the reason why i partly discussed identity in the abstraction section is because, to me, it seems like jax is setting up his own identity as the rudest and most chaotic character in the cast as a way to ensure his survival in this digital world for as long as possible. or in other words, this identity of his is something he can consistently fall back onto no matter what happens, which allows him to keep his mental stability a bit better than others. it’s a simple role that was developed only within the context of the digital circus, and he seems completely comfortable with staying in it.

additionally, here are some other circumstances where he could just fall back on his “identity”— - something bad happens to him? sure, let’s call it karma. - in the event that he does something that causes a bit too much destruction? it’s fine, he’s supposed to be the guy that would do something like that anyways. (edit: he did exactly this in episode 2. just my luck. help me.) - hurts someone on accident? wouldn’t be out of the question. maybe even intentionally if the time calls for it.

overall, it feels like his current place as the “rude character” makes it a lot easier for him to stay consistent and keep things less complicated. being nice is difficult and nuanced, you may unintentionally hurt someone by saying the wrong thing—but if you’re already known to harm people one way or another, there’s absolutely no mistakes you can make.

and for jax, it’s a way to keep himself grounded while causing a ton of chaos on the side—which he seems to like doing, so it works. this is pretty much a foolproof method of survival for him; at least, until something happens which he doesn’t expect.

but this is all just speculation. feel free to chime in with some of your own insights (´∀｀*)

———

edit: yes, this is pretty old haha. but i think it still somewhat holds true for episode 2, so i’m posting it for now. would be kinda funny if i was entirely wrong about this though (￣ ￣)

[bardicindignation]

Wild, Spaghetti on the Wall Theory Time

Braius Doomseed is NOT a paladin of Asmodeus.

Based on Subclass choices, vibes, and the Sam with the out of nowhere curveball character trend that we all know and love. Sticking the rest under a read more bc this got...long.

I know it sounds crazy, but hear me out! Sam always has a curve-ball in his back pocket with the characters he plays from Scanlan to FCG, we all know this. It's possible that the back pocket deal is gonna be a last-minute betrayal bc, yk, Asmodeus but! BUT!!! Braius can cast Moonbeam, and since, according to his character wiki he's at least a ninth level paladin, he doesn't yet have the 10th bard feature that allows him to pull spells from other classes even when you're not College of Lore (he's a Tragedy Bard). This means that he's either Oath of Watchers or Ancients, and while Watcher's could make sense for the fight against Predathos regardless of what god Braius follows...that's a lot of paladin levels to have been brought out just since the gods were aware of the situation (like, a couple weeks I think?) and neither super seems like an Asmodeus associated Oath. (As opposed to, say, Crown or Conquest, or Vengeance, or Oathbreakder.) Plus, Tevan had no fucking clue who he was, and it seems like one of Asmodeus's lieutenants might be appraised of a high level follower of his Lord being tasked with going directly after Asmodeus. But Joy! You might say. Oath of the Watchers is pretty Neutral, and he could have just ! What about the sign he god from the ichor on the wall? Why would the god of Lies tell any of his followers shit? And if not Asmodeus who the fuck is Braius following??? Ok, so, first off, let's break down the Oath. I really, really, think that it's gotta be Watchers if Braius is really a follower of Asmodeus bc Ancients is not only heavily nature aligned (not something that the Lord of the Hells is at all associated with) but the language of the description of the Oath also seems heavily aligned with good (I mean just look at the tenents) and...y'all. I don't think Braius is a Watchers Paladin. First off, Sam never once asked (to my memory) about who was within 10 ft of him at the start of initiative, when Watchers would have given all of those people a bump on their initiative. Now, this could be 'new character who dis' except. Except. Sam did consistently ask Matt if people who were within 10 feet of him who were being targeted with Delilah shit were getting hit with spell damage.

Here's the Aura of Warding from the dndwikidot page on Oath of the Ancients:

"Beginning at 7th level, ancient magic lies so heavily upon you that it forms an eldritch ward. You and friendly creatures within 10 feet of you have resistance to damage from spells." Oath. Of. The. Ancients. Bitch. (also we learned that the name Doomseed came with the oath. Naaaatuuuuure. Also also, doesn't say who the doom is for) So next up, the symbol message...what the fuck was up with that? Just bc it was an Asmodeus symbol doesn't mean he's the only bitch who can interact with it...and it was specifically not coming from the structure of the symbol itself, just the run-off. This is not a super strong point, but Asmodeus is not the only god of trickery...but more on that later. Tevan Klask doesn't know who the fuck Braius is! Look, the Lord of the Hells is a lying-ass bitch. We all know this. It's entirely possible that he keeps his people out of the loop on each other. But he's gotta know that Tevan has a line to the people going in after Ludinus the most and it feels a tad weird that Hot Devil Man would have no knowledge of a high level paladin of his Lord doing the same damn thing.

Also, Braius didn't react, like, at all to Tevan getting banished by Ludinus which feels...a little weird. So. So. If not Asmodeus, then who? What other Trickery, Nature, romance (the flirting is constant which isn't necessarily a firm indicator but c'mon) alligned deity is out there with not only what is possibly the strongest connection to whatever the fuck is going on with Predathos, but also has direct experience with followers of one 'deity' masquerading as another which could have been extremely effective without actual divine intervention? That's right, it's the motherfucking Moonweaver!! Just going by her title, it's entirely possible that this bitch was ultimately responsible for trapping Predathos in the first place, and we've heard suspiciously little of her in C3. Her cleric domains include both Trickery and Nature, and she's heavily associated with deception, misdirection, lover's trysts, and moonlight.

Yk, like with a Moonbeam. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

(My second, last minute theory is that Sam's still playing a follower of Avandra who also has Moon, Trickery, and Nature under her domains. This would be extremely funny to me. Wait fuck I'm still saying Moonweaver for my first choice but the wiki is telling me that The Changebringer is the Archenemy of the Lord of the Hells...fuck. Fuck Sam did you do this Sam let me in your brainnnnn.)