#i feel like such a small-time writer compared to Other Authors

[aesolerin]

I like your writing so much I always recognize your writing and username on ao3 whenever I look for anything

You were my first ever introduction to DD a little while ago and now I love it

I thought I would leave a nice message for you and let you know you were someone's intro to DD if that means anything

anon it means SO MUCH to me

[ponett]

i played through alan wake for the first time. here are some things i loved along the way:

the literal first words spoken in the game being "stephen king once wrote..." as alan tries to gas himself up as a writer

alan only being able to jog for a little while before getting tuckered out because you're playing as a novelist

alan feeling the need to point out an extremely obvious The Shining reference in his narration

you put the lime in the coconut

all of the random shit the taken say, but in particular stucky going on about his hot dog rankings

looking at the novels on alan's shelf and realizing how fucking huge he made his name compared to the actual book titles

all the episodes of night springs, but in particular "the quantum suicide" and "absence of creativity" ("Is that too moronic, indeed? Who can tell? It's a fine line between the stupid and the sublime... in Night Springs.")

barry's puffy red jacket being the brightest, most saturated color present in any scene he's in

agent nightingale being a direct inversion of cooper from twin peaks, who HATES small pacific northwest towns, AND having to work with their sheriff's departments, AND their coffee, AND their trees!!

the never-ending list of author names nightingale will call alan

the evil bulldozer that tries to kill you, foreshadowed earlier by the manuscript page "Wake Attacked by a Bulldozer"

one of the patients at the lodge being a game dev and hartman going "he works on... video games. it's trash, of course. but it does involve some small creative effort"

when you're talking to the old gods of asgard at the lodge and tor is routinely smacking the table with his squeaky hammer the entire time

alan and barry driving with the cardboard cutout of alan in the back seat

the rock concert segment

alan jumping like this

the dopefish poster upstairs in the bookstore

the camera panning over during the live action talk show bit to reveal that the other guest sitting next to alan is sam lake himself, who does the max payne face when prompted by the host

the fact that this game has driving segments and you can do donuts and drift into enemies

and, of course... the energizer and verizon product placement

great game

[mixelation]

do you have any tips on how to write children? love your parenting fic!

Sure! The following is for kids less than ten (usually once they're tweens the general capability of fic authors to write them improves, probably because people usually remember middle school). Keep in mind there's a huge difference between a three year old and an eight year old, though.

I think the biggest one I'd give is just remember that children characters are people. Children have their own thoughts, opinions, and ideas, and you can probably apply whatever strategy you use for writing adult characters to children. For me, I try to figure out character motives and then that guides what they do and say and how it makes them feel about things happening around them. Children will probably have more simple motivations compared to adults, although they are absolutely capable of more complex motives. For figuring out kid!motives, I try to imagine what kids' worlds consist of. For most children, school and social interactions with their teachers and other children is a huge chunk of their daily life. Their home life will also structure their motives-- do their guardians or siblings play with them? Are their guardians strict or lax? Does the kid get brought along on errands, left home alone, left with a rotating cast of babysitters, etc? How do all these factors affect how they interact with the world and what they want from it?

For an example of how I'd start with motivation for building a character in fic, Naruto's biggest motivator throughout his childhood is wanting attention because he doesn't have a home life. He acts out because he feels even negative attention is better than being ignored. So, writing his reactions to events with the idea that he genuinely just wants attention isn't very complicated. But then, what does he do once has attention? Does he react differently to positive versus negative attention? How does he react when he acts out and still fails to capture attention? How is he when he's home alone? When he fantasizes about getting his attention, how does he imagine it will go? He does his pranks for attention, so does he plan his pranks or is he mostly spontaneous, or some mix of the two? If he managed to make a friend, how would he want to play with them? When would what he wants to do in his fantasies be different from what he ends up doing, and how would he feel about it?

In considering the answers to these questions, I think another aspect of writing children that people struggle with is that children often don't have a very good sense of cause and effect, and on top of that there's huge variation in how quickly small kids pick up on action -> consequence and the nuances involved there of. Some kids, especially younger ones, will know breaking a rule leads to some negative outcome, but they might not understand the reason behind the rule and this effects their decision making. Some kids might not understand an action falls into some category there's rules about, even if they know the rules. Some kids might understand a rule and then ignore it anyway. (I told a kid I was babysitting once not to run with scissors because they could hurt themselves, and they replied, "But I do it all the time, and I've never been hurt.") I've witnessed a lot of young kids hurt another child and then get upset themselves because they literally didn't realize what they did would hurt. Kids' decisions, while they might seem illogical to adults, generally make sense to the child, and so I would encourage writers to consider why their characters are doing things and if it would make sense to that character.

The third big thing I'd keep in mind is interconnected with the two thing above, and that's "big emotions, little body." Young people often have big, confusing emotions, and they're not necessarily going to understand them and why they're happening, how to self-regulate them, or what to do about them. Like, adults have confusing emotions they don't always know what to do with, right? Imagine you're having some conflicting, confusing feelings, and also you barely understand why things are evening happening because you don't have a good handle on the concept of "consequences" outside of your mom's house rules. You also might not have even had whatever feeling before-- grief, jealousy, etc. How any given kid is going to handle their big emotions will vary because, again, children are people and they have different experiences and personalities. A kid with a good support network might be able to get an adult or maybe even another kid to help them through it. Some kids will throw tantrums or shut down or act out. Think about your child character's past experiences and what support/options might be available to them.

The final small suggestion I have is to look up age milestones. A common complaint about fictional children is them using weird, broken childspeak that's both annoying to read and unrealistic. I've worked with kids as young as three, and they can generally speak in full, coherent sentences by then.

[kaihuntrr]

part thirty/closing remarks: author's closing notes

Ending notes to the fic before it returns on the 27th of November!

Hello! Kai, speaking here, post-birthday time (though I have a lot of commitments to do for the upcoming days, haha)! Technically it’s still the 18th in some other parts of the world, so it’s still technically my birthday, so I’m happy to say that Act I is well and truly over. This has been SUCH a while ride and I’m excited to embark on the next one. Now that I’m talking about it, I’d like to be a little mushy about my feelings on it since I’ve been having so much fun writing it. 

Truely, The Sea Prince was just meant to be a personal project of mine that I thought I could just scatter bits and pieces of over on tumblr to see if people actually wanted to get interested in it. I didn’t expect gaining friends and having a bunch of people really get invested with what I have! Still, I’m happy to have gotten a strong audience, and I hope the next act is welcomed with open arms. 

With some tentative planning, Act II is due to set sail on November 27th! 

This is so my co-writer and I can build up a bulk of edits and backlogs for the fic to keep that consistent, every-other-week schedule! It also just so happens that a new life series is around the corner, so perhaps it’ll help stoke some future things for acts III to V? We shall definitely see! 

Anyway, that’s enough rambling from me. Before I go, I want to give out a short excerpt of the prologue for Act II, just so you all have something to chew on before the upcoming Life Series! <3 Take care everyone, and I’ll see you on the 27th, should everything go according to plan! (If not, best to check out tumblr, but I’ll do my best to keep on schedule <3)

———

Another day, another perfect time to set sail.

Another chance to strike at the beasts that terrorized the people.

Grian stood proudly at the bow, facing the large iron gate in the distance. He saw the large shadow cast by the stone walls, its darkness providing a sense of safety to the town’s citizens with  a glint of the canons that adorned the top. It was a ready defense from any invading monsters, though they never dared to swim close to the islands. Maybe those monsters had some intelligence after all if they knew to stay away from the kingdom. They were protected by the king, the navy, and the hunters, each one ensuring humanity could live and thrive within the walls. It was good. It was perfect. 

It was home. 

It was going to be another exciting day. The crew planned to sail off into the sea, to find some beasts to kill, and to return to the love and warmth of the people and recover. Prepare, leave, kill, return, rest, then repeat. The simple, monotonous life of a hunter was easier said than done. A lot of hunters risked their lives every day to keep the people safe and sound. It was one of the most noble deeds a person could do in their life- it was even more noble to be acknowledged by the king himself. 

One day, this crew was going to earn the king’s approval. They had already slain small packs of those disgusting monsters, an impressive feat compared to the one or two beasts other crews their age had taken down. It was only a matter of time before the king addressed him, his brothers, and their crew. Then, they’d be hunters for the king– better than all the rest! It was going to be one of the best days of their lives, he just knew it. 

After all, he was the cunning Grian Solidarity. He was the youngest of his family and had the biggest hunger to prove himself on the wild seas. He and his brothers had made this crew not too long ago, and with how much money they’d been raking in, they just had to be the best out of all the people their age! The amount of people who had looked down on them for just being green, overeager upcomers wasn’t surprising, but Grian could bet those people were eating their own insults now. They just had to be!

Grian rested his hands on the railing, breathing in the fresh air, and hummed in delight. The ship was prepared to set sail and the others would likely return before the gates were scheduled to open. He’d done his part- checking on the weapons and restocking the ship with ammo was pretty easy when he was with Mumbo and Scar- so he had the luxury of sitting back, relaxing while waiting for the others to get on board–

“Grian?” He jumped at the sound of his name. He turned around to see Joel looking around, worried. “Have you seen Jimmy? I haven’t seen him anywhere.” Grian frowned, suddenly concerned.

Jimmy had been acting weird lately. Not only had he gotten that flower tattoo out of nowhere, but he’d been acting a lot more aloof on their hunting trips too. He’d been acting like that for a couple of months at least. He had been pretty scared of the ocean before, when they were younger, but a little exposure therapy didn’t hurt and he’d been fine. It also wasn’t the first time that he had wandered around like this- but he usually came back well before the ship would set sail.

Grian hummed, trying to recall if he had seen his brother in the past few… hours, probably. He ran through where he’d last seen the other members of their crew. He’d seen Cleo hanging around with Mumbo, Scar and Bdubs were doing something together, and Lizzie was out in the port talking to Martyn before he was due to set off with the Kestrels. Grian remembered catching Joel glancing at Lizzie a dozen times earlier, silently wishing she could join them on their hunts. “...No, I haven’t,” he finally said, putting a hand on his chin. “Any idea where he’d be?”

“No, that’s why I was asking you in the first place…,” Joel grumbled. “He’s probably in the harbor somewhere, let’s go look for him.”

“But I just got comfortable…,” Grian jokingly complained. One sour look from Joel made him roll his eyes and relent. Jimmy knew this town like the back of his hand, just like the rest of them. He wasn’t lost, Grian was sure of it. “Fine. But Tim’s probably just wandering around again. You know how he is.” He shrugged. Joel made a small frown and sighed, but followed Grian as the two descended from the ship and into the hustle and bustle of the port town behind them.

To be continued in Act II: Bait.

[k-s-morgan]

Recently checked back up on ATLWETD to see if it had updated and followed the tumblr thread here. Imagine my surprise seeing all of the wonderful snippets and asks you answered. Tom using the mood stone? I almost forgot that was a thing. And finding out that Tom was just being a possesive/calculating bastard when he took Harrys food is embarassing to me since my guess was so far off. I thought that Tom inferred that Harry suspected him of poisoning/ truth seruming his food when he told Tom "Happy Poisoning".

Anyways, I decided it was finally my time to step up and praise you like the glorious writer you are. How on earth you could ever believe that your works arent as creative or as plot heavy as other tomarry works is beyond me. To me, your fics have lovely foreshadowing that makes me pay very close attention to anything that is mentioned offhandedly by a character because in your works everything means something. (Like seriously, one detail I missed in WHGTB on the first read was Harry reading the description of the book Tom was going to use to bond him and you stuffing permanent bonding inbetween fertility and necromancy. You had Harry misdirect us by having him muse about necromancy so we wouldn't notice. And you're right, I didn't)

And the humanity and characterization that you give to any character you write? Hell, i'd say you give them more layers than the origional authors. I always know that you won't make the characters make stupid and out of character actions just to advance the plot.

My experience with your writing started with WHGTB (my first convincing tomarry fic btw, you were the one who snagged me). After that, I trailed after your content like a lost puppy. I consumed your hannigram fics without having a spec of knowledge other than "haha cannibal eats the rude". I have now watched the telltale John Doe/Bruce Wayne playthroughs on youtube and rewatched the lego batman movie for the first time since i saw it in theaters when it came out. A Rule for a Rule is shaping up to be the best thing that happened to batjokes (outside of Half Way Across). I've even tenatively read through your Black Butler work, which I was hesitant to look at given the age gap and having never watched the anime. Should have never doubted that your approach to their relationship would make sense. You make an anime which could be categorized as ridiculous (I apologize, I have no nostalgic memories of this anime holding me back. I read your fic first, the anime can't compare) into something psychological and beautiful. Just so so real.

Anywho, there's my small (because I could genuinely write an analytical essay on your works and enjoy it) love letter to your writing.

Stay safe angel, it's unfortunate that I can't do anything to help you or your country. Even more disgusting that my country could help if they gave half a shit but won't. I would say I'm praying for you, but given that I'm not religious that goes nowhere. So, pathetically, my 11:11 wishes will be used for your continuted health.

Hope your writing continues to bring you joy <3

Hi! Thank you so much for such a lengthy, wonderful ask - I have a few more unanswered ones in my ask box, and I'm so delighted that my stories evoke so many thoughts and feelings in my readers!

Funnily, quite a few people thought that Tom sharing Harry's food and drinking from his cup is related to Harry's 'happy poisoning'! This never occured to me. I admit I love when such stuff happens because it proves how a text is its own thing, a living organism, something that the author and every reader can have vastly different interpretations of. In this case, yes, I intended for Tom to keep testing the intimate boundaries and to see how much Harry would allow, to gauge what exact type of relationship they used to share. Slowly turning him into a possessive, obsessed monster in love is such a delight.

I'm so gratified that you enjoy the foreshadowing I'm trying to build! I do love it, and I can tell that in ATLWETD, the seeds of the largest plot twists and the ending have already been planted. It's difficult to recognize them without knowing the rest, but if someone re-reads the whole story after it's done, these little hints should become obvious.

Also, it's so flattering that WHGTB became the first Tomarry story you really liked! Really, it's an honor, considering how big this part of fandom is and how many brilliant stories fill it. And knowing that you followed my fics across the fandoms despite not being a part of them - wow! I'm speechless! You honestly made me blush, I'm so happy to hear all this.

I appreciate every word you wrote - this means so much to me, I re-read your ask a couple of times because of how happy it made me. I hope you continue to enjoy my stories and discovering new great fandoms :D Thank you!

[blueaetherr]

romance oblivion

pairing: mason mount x fem!reader [she/her]

warning(s): angst?

summary: the one where feelings are no longer mutual

author's note: something short to get myself out of my writer's block. my requests are open if anyone wants to send a request or two <;3.

In the second hour of the day everyone and everything seemed well settled in the night. The neighbours' music and lights were off by midnight, the streets beyond the estates quiet and deserted of traffic and commotion, all while the animals of the day decided to retire until the early hours of dawn returned in the following hours.

Yet in the early hours of the day, Mason and Y/N were mildly awake. Still dressed in party attire from earlier, resting comfortably in Mason's conservatory. Under a dim light, surrounded by the dark of the night, they entertained themselves with their slurred jokes from fogged minds, dancing with a lack of care and laughter that occasionally brought them out of their fatigue.

Here was Y/N and Mason, friends who were openly intertwined with one another. From the way they spoke to one another, from the way they were able to spend time together outside of normal hours, the way they chose to compose themselves in the privacy of their friendship compared to in front of others—which was all the same—it was difficult to expect anything other than an honest friendship that would see years and milestones to come.

Tilting her head she focused her gaze upon the individual on the other side of the coffee table. She asked, "Tell me, Mason: how are you?" 

He offered his friend a wondering look. "How am I?" Mason had to repeat the question to himself. For the time since they settled in the space, their conversations had only known laughter and unserious behaviours. The shift in conversation was more than sudden to him.

She rolled her eyes as she laughed a bit. "Yes! I don't see anyone else here to ask."

Mason reached his hand back to scratch the nape of his neck. He let his sight wander away from Y/N. "Well... I don't know what to say," he exhaled, leaning his head rightward. It was a simple question to answer, sure. Though returning his eyes to Y/N's unfazed gaze—a look demanding and pronounced, a look purposely in his vision—he felt the need to deliver. He sighed as his face relaxed back into a smile. "I feel like you know everything about me already." 

And he was right to think so 'cause for the most part, it was true. Considering they had been friends since the beginning of time, they lived near one another and their friendship included but wasn't limited to personal and intimate conversations, it wasn't a surprise that they knew enough about one another just as they did themselves.

"C'mon, Mase. There has to be something I don't know about," Y/N said as her face opened up further, her eyebrows lifting slightly. She mentioned in a small voice, "Let's not point out the elephant in the room."

In fact, here was Y/N and Mason, friends and ex-partners who were openly intertwined with one another.

While exes they chose to remain friends—incredible friends even. After two years of dating, they knew it was time to let each other go romantically to preserve all they already had. Their break-up, as unfortunate and tragic as it was, was necessary and understandable; they wanted different things for one another and themselves, leaving them feeling unsupported in the relationship that was initially nurturing. 

As always they were patient and kind and gentle. To themselves, to one another, to the process of returning to a friendship that actually never faded away. Nothing was irrational, arguments were limited to nothing and feelings were preserved on both sides.

"I mean..."

Watching Y/N eating with a lack of care, focusing her sight upon him, her legs raised at ease on the coffee table, slightly undone in front of him. She made it clear that she was comfortable being around him as a friend, as an ex and as a friend again. She was clear of him. She no longer thought about him until her mind ran dry of thoughts to explore. She no longer held valid nor romantic feelings for Mason.

Yet here Mason was. Watching Y/N like his own reflection, struggling to form words from his distant thoughts, uncertainty every time he spoke up, observing her every action with changeless admiration and longing. For her, for something more with her—whether worthy or not of it. He had been trying to move on, trying to focus his thoughts on someone else, anything else though his attempts weren't enough. 

From the time they had ended their relationship up until now, Mason still wasn't over Y/N... and she didn't even know, both not even in the slightest way.

So Mason had to say, shrugging through a now pained smile. "Nothing, nothing has changed for me... Same old, same old, you know."

And though he wanted to say more—to express himself, to say hear me out or let's give us one more chance—he knew he couldn't so he didn't. Not only for Y/N's peace of mind but for his. After all, before they were lovers, even before they were ex-partners, they were rightfully friends. A friendship that had always been around and uniquely theirs. Y/N was his friend, and Mason would never compromise that for his own gains.

That left Mason stuck somewhere in a place where he would be alone and without Y/N. Somewhere he would continue wanting and yearning for someone who no longer desired him. Somewhere he would continue falling for Y/N with nothing to break his fall. And his most devastating reality, somewhere he would continue to fall for Y/N while she no longer would for him but rather for someone else.

[tavyliasin]

Writer Interview Tag

I was tagged by @redroomroaving and once I'd finished feeling about a hundred emotions from reading I managed to follow it up.

I definitely got a little personal as well, and I know I’m prone to rambling so I’ll pop the questions and answers below the cut. A mild CW for discussion of physical pain and some very very light mentions of mental health. Tagging @morb-untamed @sweetmage @dmbakura @hydropyro @ineadhyn @nicocoer @wixed to do this if you would like to, but there is absolutely no pressure to talk about yourselves or in any personal detail. And anyone else reading this who I missed tagging (I forget names and tags so often, forgive me) please feel free to use me as your tag-in and let me know so I can read your answers too.

When did you start writing?

I have no idea, truly. Stories and reading were a big part of my life since before I could read, and as soon as I could read independently I devoured books and imagined stories in quiet moments. There are a few things I’ve worked on under another name, another identity, but no massive published works. A couple of unfinished SFW fanfics, and some larger original projects that remain on hiatus. As for writing smut and spice and taking fanfic more seriously? That all started in September 2023, and has just grown from there. I was hesitant at first, and you’ll see that in my early author notes, but from there I feel I’ve truly grown in my style and skill, as well as my creativity and ability to delve into character details and kink alike.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

Since writing more, I’ve become a terrible reader. I can’t really focus on it for long because my brain goes into ADHD rebellion and says “no, no, we don’t want to read story we want to create story” which is endlessly frustrating when I have stacks of unread books and a ton of fics earmarked by very talented authors. I will say there is a particular thing many may notice in my works – when writing, I very rarely refer to genitalia in direct terms. It’s just a personal preference when writing, you won’t find the word “cock” in any of my works, but contrary to how it might sound I have absolutely no issue with reading it in the works of others. I am an odd creature, I freely admit that. So…yes, there are themes, pairings, styles, and vocabulary features that I enjoy reading but do not write myself.

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

I don’t hear comparisons really, and I don’t aim to emulate anyone either, though I will admit I try to keep just a few little moments of humour or sly winks to the audience in similar ways to Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams. Just those quick lines or cutaways that for a moment join reader and author in a little shared joke.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I can only really write comfortably in one place, at my PC. I have 3 screens set up around my seat, which is actually the end seat of a reclining sofa, so I have a heated pad behind my back to reduce pain. I have a mini fridge with drinks on the table beside me with the side screen that has Discord on it at all times, my larger screen (the TV) sometimes has character images for reference or notes or just Spotify up so I can swap songs and playlists quickly. The last screen is in front of me on a table that goes over my footrest, and my keyboard is on a lap desk over my legs. 

I’ll almost always have my headphones on, and a small fan when it gets too warm. Sometimes I do end up a little chaotic with snacks in reach and meds also on the table so I don’t have to have anyone fetch them for me.

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

It can’t be controlled. The muse is as fickle as it is demanding, when it’s there it wants everything all at once, and when it’s gone?... It leaves a devastating emptiness that honestly I struggle with at times. Even right now, tonight I planned to write, but when I finally got the free time and got set up…nothing feels appealing to try. So I’m doing this instead, and not forcing it. 

There are things I try at times, and things I recommend, too. First? Before you start writing, tend to your basic needs. Do you need a drink? Food? Relevant medication? A nap? A talk with a friend? A bit of fresh air or physical movement? If one of these needs hasn’t been met, it’ll likely soon become an obstacle to your writing. I like to have a drink and snack ready and with me when I start so it’s there as and when I might need it, and I do rely on caffeine like a stereotypically unmedicated ADHD author…

Second, set the mood. It can help for some people to have this routine, to get their playlist going, to be in the right place, to have the things that set a whole zone and bubble. For a while, I had a specific hat I would wear when writing for another project. I could tell myself “I am putting the hat on now, so I will focus and do this thing” and in some way it trained me to write more. I know others who have done things like always listening to a specific genre of music to write, so now when they hear that genre they get the urge to write. Third is take a shower. Nothing gives me more ideas than a good shower, and I even bought a waterproof notepad and pencil set so I can make those notes whilst in there and not fret about forgetting an idea. Other than that, I recommend going back to the thing that inspired you to write. Play the game or watch scenes with the characters you want to write about, find their voices and mindsets. You can also close your eyes and imagine the scene like a play – put the characters on your stage at the start of the scene and watch what they do in the scenario. Let them show you how they react. Some people also do well to write out a plan or bulletpoints, but I find personally this can bite me in the ass because the process of writing can often stray from my original plan. Which isn’t a bad thing, but it can feel frustrating that I didn’t use ideas that I was initially passionate about.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

Ah here it is. Whilst I could go quite simply with the kinks that I keep utilising that don’t surprise me in the slightest – I know well that I enjoy writing a spicy shifting of power balance between strong-minded characters, as well as a lot of BDSM kink – there are deeper parts to this. Identity. That’s a theme that keeps rearing its head beneath a lot of works, and you’ll find it most noticeable in how I write both Haarlep and He Who Was, but it tends to worm its way into other things too. It…did not surprise me, though, because it’s something I have struggled with over this past year within myself.

I created this name, this identity, as a way to be comfortable in sharing kink fiction and spicy works without it being easily identifiable under my actual name. I still don’t like to be too personal, or share my face or real name under this one, because I would rather keep a few close friends and family out of sight of my fandom thirsting. I’m certain a lot of us are the same – it isn’t really about shame but knowing that I, and they, would likely not be comfortable discussing this level of subject matter. I’ve relaxed a little over time, and have no doubt that a few may have worked out who I am and simply kept it quiet which I appreciate endlessly, just as I appreciate that those who do know both of my identities have never shared that information or made it public. I’m happy to meet people in person, just not to have my self online shared with my other self, as I’m sure you can understand. Anyway, I digress…

Something that the keen-eyed accomplice might have noticed in me is a shift in my speech. I used a few more mannerisms and speech patterns, particularly terms of endearment, under this name when I began. It was a way to separate the self, as well as to engage with a different audience in a different way. I explained it to the few who knew both early on as “same person, different font”, because I don’t change who I am just a few parts of how I speak or interact…but I’ve dropped a lot of the endearments now. Partly because there were more than a few who expressed they were uncomfortable with this in conversation – which I fully respect and understand – so it was easier to just drop them entirely rather than double checking or switching vocabulary between people and servers. But it has also fallen away a little as I have become more comfortable with both sides of myself, allowing them to integrate again more, and I owe a good amount of that to being able to meet fandom friends in person and find that they didn’t turn away from knowing all of me and instead have become even better friends. 

So…yes, the theme of names and identity keeps popping up. The power of names, the importance of identity, how one can hold on to one’s sense of self when it feels as if it is wavering, or when a role must be played. It’s little wonder I was so strongly drawn to so many favourites. Another recurring theme, of course, is pain. Physical. Whilst this is often in the form of kink and pain play, I’ve written a few pieces where it has been a point that is not about the sexual and positive side. I am in pain. 24/7. Without end. It will not get better. It has been this way for over 10 years. The level of the pain is “I cannot walk more than 10 metres before it is too much”, and “I have to drastically reduce and monitor my physical activity to prevent pain getting worse”, so I feel very intimately familiar with pain. You’ll find it in my writing as visceral and detailed descriptions of the sensations, because I’ve felt every one of them and might just be feeling them in that moment as I write. 

I’m going to keep trying to write short comfort pieces, too. Because as I once wrote as a dialogue line for Halsin, when Tav asked how he always seemed to know the right thing to say:  

“Sometimes we say the things we need to hear the most.” 

What is your reason for writing?

Every reason ever. There’s…not a lot I can do in this body. So many hopes and dreams and even careers I’ve had to leave behind, through the struggles of mental and physical health. Whilst the former is far better, the latter is the issue… But writing is something I can do with little physical effort. If I’m in pain, I can take my medication and absorb into fiction. 

I started writing smut as a challenge, but also as a way to tell a story I was becoming rather attached to. My main longfic was one born from playing the game, and wondering about telling the story between the lines, giving reason to the choice the player character was making under my instruction. Since then, it has grown to be so much more.

I’d love to sit here and tell you “I only write for myself, I don’t need external validation” but that…would be a half-truth at best. I write because I love sharing these stories, I love that they can reach out and touch hearts and minds in ways I might never know, but I adore when someone does send back their echo across the vast void between us to say “I enjoyed this” or “this story made me feel something”. That’s…it’s everything to know I have some value. Which sounds a lot like I’m pinning my self-worth on feedback or kudos, and whilst I can’t deny that’s a hard habit to break, I do know it isn’t everything. I just want it to still be something. To know I can do more than just…exist. 

Truly if you were to ask me what I feel the purpose is to my entire life, it would be “to leave each corner of the world I touch a little brighter and better than it was before I got there”, and whilst I know that’s impossible to do all the time I still want to try. And writing? Sharing stories? That’s leaving a positive mark, giving someone enjoyment in their day – yes, even sexually, with the kinky and sexy writing. That is still a positive to someone’s day, an indulgence, something that lifts them and certainly nothing to be ashamed of.

If I can do more than that with emotional writing, with comfort pieces, with cathartic moments and with stories that have more meaning behind the words…all the better.

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

The best are the ones that pull out favourite lines or moments, but honestly every single comment means the world to me. An incoherent keysmash, a simple “I loved this”, even those are such a boost particularly on a hard day. 

Readers, please know how much it helps. Even a click on the kudos as an anonymous guest, it’s…it lets us know we aren’t just shouting into the void. It tells us those Hits are not people just opening up the fic then closing it because they hated it. It means the whole world to know we’ve done something that you enjoyed, in whatever way that was.

I’ll also say that some of the ones that have meant the most and have stuck with me are comments on the more personal pieces, like with The Love of Loviatar – the Abdirak x Reader fic where I play a little with worlds colliding to allow a reader character who experiences chronic pain (remarkably similar to my own, don’t think about that too hard) to have that moment with Abdirak who validates and appreciates them exactly how they are. Gentle care mixed with BDSM, trading the bad pain for the good pain, the pain that is welcome and has purpose, a little fantasy of enjoying what the body can do rather than being trapped by what it cannot… Every time I get a comment there, I damn near cry. Or just openly cry. They mean so much. I know how much Abdirak can mean to us, and I am so glad I can reach you all. 

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

I…well… To be thought of at all is an honour. I’m shocked any time I encounter someone who has read my works, despite logically knowing I have a good number of readers from the numbers alone. I just…don’t look at those numbers often, it’s not good for me. 

I’d like readers to know I care about them. Every last one. To know I would love to tell all the stories they want to read, and that I fully welcome their messages, comments, and even friendship when we share social spaces. There’s something special about the connections we can make in unexpected places, and I’m just delighted to be here sharing stories with you all. 

I don’t need high respect, endless adoration, or some kind of pedestal. I’m a human, unfortunately – squishy and fallible and flawed and suffering and there is still beauty and worth to me even when I don’t see it myself. Just saying that last part louder for everyone else who has loud negative thoughts of themselves. It’s ok for you to see my flaws, and it’s ok for us all to have love for one another despite those flaws. Love in the platonic sense, of course – there are levels of connections we make with people from a distant echo of a brief exchange of words to the direct warmth of a friendship. It’s as important to not underestimate the value as it is important to not overestimate our closeness to people we don’t truly know.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I am beginning to believe it is the wild ideas I have for crackship pairings and turning them into something serious and meaningful. I love taking an unlikely coupling then finding what makes them actually genuinely work. 

I’m also getting quite confident in sensual writing as well as kink, in the particular style that I have for it. I know well that it isn’t to everyone’s tastes, but those who do enjoy my style and method will always have something in the buffet of fic to fill their plate.

I really hope to transfer this to my original work when I get it finished, as I feel like just maybe I might have a niche of style that isn’t as often seen in published works. Then again, I’m not exactly devouring raunchy original fiction so perhaps I’m entirely mistaken and would get ripped to shreds by critics of the genre. Who knows? But I will try to get published when it’s done. I hope a few of you might even read it someday.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

Ahh definitely both. I have written characters and pairings I’m not personally into that much, though sometimes (Yurgir) I have found myself enjoying the character after writing with them. It’s a fun little quirk, I start writing something thinking “am I into this?” and realise later “oops new kink acquired” or “ahh ok I see why people like [character] so much now.” 

I do really love writing requests or rare pairings/characters that readers haven’t seen before or are excited to see more of. I hope to keep doing a mix of that and the characters/pairings that I love most myself. If there’s something you’d like to see, I’m more than happy to take suggestions – there are a few kinks, characters, and tropes that I have a hard “nope” line on (not kink shaming, just personal comfort levels – I love that you can enjoy those things elsewhere I am just not the chef to cook that dish for you) but otherwise I love wild ideas and writing something that someone explicitly wants to read~

How do you feel about your own writing?

I really struggle with this one, but I think many of us do. I go from feeling confident that people enjoy what I’ve written and that I have this skill to bring worlds and characters to life with mere words on a page, yet other times? I will freely admit some works of mine take longer because I just hit this point where I just cannot tell if it’s any good. I know intellectually that I have the same style, tropes, stories, kinks that people like and enjoy, but as I’m sat there staring at it I’m questioning everything because I’m just not feeling it. That seems pretty natural, I think, that we are the worst critics of our own works because we’ve read them so many times or thought far too hard about every word and line… But I tend to solve this with an external view. Beta Readers have saved works from near extinction by checking it over, telling me what does need fixing, and reminding me that actually the rest of it is just fine I’m simply overthinking it all because my mind is struggling with something else like fatigue or pain or just a low kind of day.

So… Overall, writing has been a new life for me. Particularly in this last year, trying something new – expanding into NSFW fanfic has found me countless new connections, friends, experiences I wouldn’t have had otherwise and a real feeling of accomplishment and validation that just wasn’t happening in WIPs that were taking too long and getting no feedback at all. 

Writing isn’t just something I do, it’s inextricably a part of who I am, and in its own way it continues to shape exactly what “who I am” can mean.

And I am grateful to every single one of you who has shared this journey with me so far. I cannot wait to see how far we can go together~

[banggyu0308]

hey author!!! i love your works so much they’re all so good and i love the beomgyu one omg i think i’ve read it a few times now hehe 🤭 but anyways here’s my request!!

i was thinking beomgyu asking the reader to hang out with him because he’s utterly in love with them and wants to try and confess but they spend the whole day with another member (i don’t mind which!) so he gets really jealous and hides himself away because he’s really clingy and when the reader finds him sulking and asks him why he just spills that he loves them but felt insecure after today because he thought the member would be a better match so the reader shows him how much he means to them ifywim 😏😏 but i live for whimpery sub gyu who wants nothing more to be called the readers good boy i feel like gyu would have a huge praise kink 🤭

anyways hope you have an amazing day and if that wasn’t detailed enough do ask for more!! and stay healthy!! 🫶🫶🫶

i am so so so so so sorry this took almost two months i was gonna make it a whole fic but then i got so writer's blocked and im really sorry 😭❤️

warnings: idol gyu, jealous sulky gyu, praise, unprotected sex, handjob, blowjob, crying (not related to sex), yeah i made the other member yeonjun just for fun, sub gyu but he's on top, reader calls him 'gyu' and 'good boy', virgin beomgyu, mommy kink, very slight pussy eating

beomgyu who texts you so sweetly, asking if you maybe wanna hang out today, he's off of work and the first thing he thought of doing was spending time with you 🥺 a smile on your lips as you type out a response and he's at your house in 10 minutes, hugging you tight when you open the door :(( a wide grin on his face the whole ride to the dorm, asking what you want to do, a movie maybe? that'd be fun, you can cuddle and he can play with your hair and see if he can get away with a small kiss on your forehead... but of course he doesn't tell you any of this. tugging you by your hand into the dorm once you arrive, stopped in his tracks by yeonjun :(( a slight pout on his lips when his hyung gives you a hug and you giggle, and before beomgyu knows it you're off in the living room talking with yeonjun, laughing at something he says, and the bright look of enjoyment on your face makes him want to cry. of course you'd rather hang out with yeonjun... can't compare with his hyung in any way, but it's fine, maybe the three of you can watch a movie together?

beomgyu sitting awkwardly on the couch as you and yeonjun talk, his eyes on his lap, he almost wishes you'd make a move to acknowledge him :(( too sucked in to talking with yeonjun, and when you don't even notice him getting up to leave, beomgyu starts thinking that maybe that's fine... yeonjun's probably better for you anyways

sulking in his room and internally hoping you'll come and find him, tears pricking his eyes and he hides under his blanket when he realizes that's not the case, he's still there 30 minutes later when yeonjun announces he's leaving and you realize beomgyu's disappeared... wandering around the dorm to find him and checking his room... there's a beomgyu-shaped lump curled up under the blanket and you sit on the edge of the bed, voice soft as you say gyu? are you okay?

he doesn't respond but a part of the lump wiggles a bit, and you assume it's his head and he's shaking it. why not? you rub at his back lightly and he flinches, making you draw back your hand. gyu, please, tell me?

he pokes his head out of the blanket and you notice his cheeks are red, his hair messy, and there are dried tear tracks on his face. just wanted to hang out with you, love you so much, not like a friend at all but yeonjun-hyung would be so much better for you than me he admits, tears filling his eyes and streaking down his cheeks again.

your eyes widen in surprise, and your lips form a small o. gyu... i don't like yeonjun like that. at all.

but you were so good together... even laughed at all his jokes he mumbles, hiding his face again.

by this point you're so sick and tired of his moping, and you have no idea how to say what you want, so you simply lay down next to him in his bed, face across from his, place a hand on his cheek, and lean forward to brush his lips with yours. you can feel his whole body tense against you and under your other hand, his heartbeat speeds up so fast you almost giggle, using your hand on his cheek to pull him closer.

only love you like that, gyu, i promise you exhale, pressing more kisses to his lips and cheek before drawing them down his neck, biting a hickey onto the soft skin there... he doesn't even know how many times you two'd be having a conversation and your gaze would just drop to his neck, something so tempting about it. you press a kiss to his adam's apple before licking up it slowly, sucking a mark directly on it, tongue on his perfect smooth skin, and he lets out a whimper so shocking it makes you gasp before running a hand up and down the expanse of his waist... he's wearing a fitted tank top today and he looked so fuckable in it, dipping so low to expose his collarbones, your lips focusing on them instead.

your hand slips under his waistband to palm him gently. his tip is leaking precum onto his boxers, and there's already a wet splotch there when you tug down his pants, sliding your hand up and down his length once, taking him in your mouth after whispering gonna show you that, alright? show you you're the only one i want

he giggles just a little, humming the tune of blue hour before letting out a small hiss, your tongue dipping over his tip and he's already twitching in your mouth, an embarrassed flush creeping up his neck, he can't help it, you make him feel so good :((

but you stop just before he cums, tutting, saying only gonna cum once you're inside me, alright? and he nods in agreement, his eyes wide, and he half thinks you're going to ride him, but you suddenly lay on your back, tugging off your pants and spreading your legs wide for him to see... and beomgyu can hardly breathe, cunt looking so delicious, he can't help settling between your legs with a long lap at your clit before pressing his tip to your entrance, he knows what to do even if he hasn't done it before. pushing in just a little, looking at you for approval before sinking in a little more, gummy walls around his dick making his arms shake, can barely hold himself up :(( losing himself just a little when you clamp down around him, his hips twitching forwards on their own. your lips are parted silently, head leaned back in pleasure, but you gather yourself to gently rock your hips towards his, encouraging him to start thrusting in and out and a slow pace that grows more desperate when he catches your lips with his, mumbling against you am i making you feel good?

you nod, gasping shakily when he presses up against that perfect spot, eyes squeezing shut so, so good, you're doing so good, my good boy, aren't you?

his whole body shakes at the praise, little whimpers leaving his lips as he struggles to keep his pace steady, an incoherent sentence slipping out of his mouth, and you ask him to repeat himself... say it again, please n/n, say again?

and you giggle, threading your fingers through his hair mommy's good boy, aren't you, gyu?

his whimpers turn to gasps and his movements are erratic now, no pace set, just his hips hitting yours repeatedly, and a whine of mommy, mommy, 'm gonna cum, please? makes you jolt back from getting lost in your pleasure. you nod, and he pulls out to cum on your thighs, his eyes going so wide at the sight

he licks up his cum before nudging your clit with his nose, tongue lapping at your cunt until he has you shaking under him, which honestly doesn't take long... his tongue is inexperienced but he knows how to use it, dragging his tongue along your slit to capture all your arousal once you cum under him <3

once you recover, the both of you let out simultaneous giggles, and you pull him close to you, resting your head on his shoulder... he's the little spoon tonight 🤭 whispering in his ear that it's always been him for you, there's no other option in your mind, and look, he's all yours now <3

[thelustybraavosimaid]

Bro you just killed my Kid Cudi listening sesh for this. How many times are we going to go over this with you people for fuck's sake

Rhaelya stans hate Sansa because...

Let me stop you right there. I am a Rhaelya, a Jonrya, and a Jon stan. I don't think about Sansa unless I'm forced to. My hyperfixation is on certain characters. Sansa isn't on my radar enough for me to hate her. Like Jon, I feel little else but indifference for her.

Sansa being a hostage makes Lyanna...look like she was a hostage...because there are parallels in both their situations.

But it's *not* a parallel, and here's exactly why.

Rhaegar is not like Joffrey.

Rhaegar actually died with Lyanna's name on his lips, as was confirmed in the official World of Ice and Fire App.

He was also described as a "love-struck prince" by the author himself:

At last I was able to ask him the question I had sent for the tombola. I have always been fascinated by how ASOIAF embodies the theories put forward by Acemoglu and Robinson about countries with extractive institutions (which hamper development). So my question was: Why do you think the political institutions in the Seven Kingdoms are so weak? His answer: the Kingdom was unified with dragons, so the Targaryen's[sic] flaw was to create an absolute monarchy highly dependent on them, with the small council not designed to be a real check and balance. So, without dragons it took a sneeze, a wildly incompetent and megalomaniac king, a love struck prince, a brutal civil war, a dissolute king that didn't really know what to do with the throne and then chaos. Interesting answer.

[Source]

Joffrey had no real love for Sansa. He saw her as an object to mistreat and misuse. He had no empathy and a deep lack of consideration for other people. He had her beaten because it gave him momentary gratification, because he was a psychopath. How is this comparable in any way to Lyanna at the tower of joy?

In fact, the whole point of what we are finding out about Rhaegar through Dany's chapters is to prove that Rhaegar is literally not the monster Robert has been making him out to be. That all Robert has said was due of his blind hatred of him and little more. So again, how is Lyanna's experiences in the tower of joy comparable to Sansa being beaten and harmed as a hostage in King's Landing?

How could this be a parallel, and can you back your claim with anything other than headcanons that have no basis in the books?

There is a reason why the tale of the winter rose was told to Jon specifically — because Bael the Bard and the Stark maiden is analogous to Rhaegar and Lyanna.

George says this about romance:

It's interesting, to get back to this issue of romance that you raised earlier. When I was in Spain a few years ago, I had dinner with a woman — a Spanish academic — and a big fan of both science fiction and romance, and she had read a lot of my stuff because people said I was a very romantic writer. And she sort of launched at me and said, "What are you talking about?! You are not a romantic writer, you know. Nobody ever lives happily ever after in your books!"

I was defending it, saying, "Well, but that's a different tradition of romance. I don't — I'm a romantic writer in the tradition of The Great Gatsby and Romeo and Juliet, and, you know, the Beauty and the Beast. These things don't necessarily have happy endings, but aren't the most powerful romances the unfulfilled romances — the romances where people go their separate ways, but they'll always have Paris, like in Casablanca, one of the films I showed here. You know, they go separate at the end, but they'll always have Paris." And she basically said, "No, you're wrong. They have to be happily ever after together for it to be romance, otherwise it's just sad."

[Source—clip starts at around 03:19]

This traditional telling of romance is shown quite clearly with both Bael the Bard with the Winter Rose and Rhaegar with Lyanna. Bael the Bard's tale was briefly happy:

No. They had been in Winterfell all the time, hiding with the dead beneath the castle. The maid loved Bael so dearly she bore him a son, the song says...though if truth be told, all the maids love Bael in them songs he wrote.

But also ended in tragedy:

"The song ends when they find the babe, but there is a darker end to the story. Thirty years later, when Bael was King-beyond-the-Wall and led the free folk south, it was young Lord Stark who met him at the Frozen Ford...and killed him, for Bael would not harm his own son when they met sword to sword."

"So the son slew the father instead," said Jon.

"Aye," she said, "but the gods hate kinslayers, even when they kill unknowing. When Lord Stark returned from the battle and his mother saw Bael's head upon his spear, she threw herself from a tower in her grief. Her son did not long outlive her. One o' his lords peeled the skin off him and wore him for a cloak." (Jon VI, ACoK)

Rhaegar left to fight in the War of the Usurper, lost and died. Lyanna died giving birth to Jon. And Jon died trying to save "Arya" from Ramsay.

This is what George means by a romantic love story.

And they also love Arya, because...Arya...looks like Lyanna

Or maybe we just like Arya because she's a fantastic character. Idk OP, could be that.

and isn't as hyper feminine as Sansa

This ties in quite well to the misogyny some "fans" of the series have to women like Arya. It's not because Sansa is "hyper feminine" that I don't care for her. I'm just indifferent to her. Femininity has absolutely nothing to do with it. I don't know if you know, but women can and do express themselves in different ways.

therefore her fans think she aligns with Rhaegar

?????????????

because they...hate Sansa and pretend its a love story

That is 100% the way George is taking R+L's story. This is quite literally his preferred telling of a romantic story. One where they share a brief affection for one another despite the eventual consequences, but end up separated, or worse.

Even though the point of Lyanna Stark is that her untold narrative is comparative to both Sansa and Arya

How is Lyanna's narrative comparative to Sansa? The only thing you've given was a non-parallel of being in the Red Keep/tower of joy, but there's nothing to suggest that Lyanna was trapped, beaten, or harmed there.

The king frowned. "A knife, perhaps. A good sharp one, and a bold man to wield it."

Ned did not feign surprise; Robert's hatred of the Targaryens was a madness in him. (Eddard II, AGoT)

--

For the first time in years, he found himself remembering Rhaegar Targaryen. He wondered if Rhaegar had frequented brothels; somehow he thought not. (Eddard IX, AGoT)

You do not find it strange that the brother of the woman who was supposedly trapped and imprisoned at the tower of joy has no ill words to say about the man who supposedly committed such heinous crimes?

[dapper-lil-arts]

Few mlp fanfic questions.

Are there any stories you read that influenced you to start writing your own?

Are there any characters you find it difficult to write?

I think everyone has their own opinion on what the best story the fandom has produced is. What do you think it is?

Does it feel strange to have come into the horse fic writing game so late? Especially with so many big authors already so popular.

Drawing on that previous question. How have the other writers in the fandom been towards you? Have you found the community welcoming?

1 - Not fanfiction, no, I was more influenced on media as a whole! And originally I started writing fanfic before I started actually reading it.

2 - Not in an actual writing sense, but fluttershy and rainbow dash dont rly mesh with my kind of stories usually. I usually write large stories with emotional resonance and lots of drama and action and romance, and characters like Fluttershy and Rainbow are harder to motivate for narratives like these, considering how chill and laid back they tend to me. I find it easier to push the others into drastic situations. 3 - I can't say yet, i've only read a few, and although I've enjoyed plenty, I've never had one to truly engross me and make me think "oh yeah, this is the peak. It cant get better than this" yet. Maybe its bc I write what I want and dont see as many stories like mine out there? Again, large adventures with lots of personal drama and romance all interconected with the same themes and narratives coupled with incredible payoffs. I've seen good dramas and good action and good romance, but rarely all in the same fic! (I have seen some incredible comedy fics tho.)

4 - Not really! I am really glad bronies arent around anymore, i did not want to deal with them, tbh. I will say though, now that the fandom is more chill and lowkey and mostly inhabited by gay people, there's no chance that I'll ever get one of my fics to have like. big audio dramas and comics made for them, no matter how good they are or appreciated they are.

It is definitely a shame when I see an incredibly popular fic and its like. Trashy, not even that interesting and bland, and I think damn. Were i in the fandom back then, could I dethrone this? The answer is no because I will never be famous lmao.

5 - Any writers I've met have been incredibly kind and supporting and fun! it's been a delight to meen peeps working on similar projects like mine and having the chance to discuss our crazy ideas, hehh. It is definitely a bit sadly a not very broad space, since for the people that are fans of this show, not many write or even read. Then you see people going "I never watched equestria girls bc it was teenage stuff" over you know, the children stuff, and I just scratch my head lmao. The writing part of the fandom is definitely a very small one compared to the rest, but there's good stuff in there.

It is def a bit disheartening at times, writing is smth that you put a LOT of effort to make coherent and fun, and sometimes peeps barely read it. it is what it is! i've got close friends that dont read my writing bc they cant focus enough to read or find time, it happens.

[ilovedazaiosamu]

“I love you, Myshka”

author’s note : hello, im a new writer here, if you can, please give me tips on how to get better! /// i’m also sorry that my fyodor is ooc😓

characters : fyodor, reader(you), a doctor

genre : angst, hurt/comfort, happy ending

enjoy!!

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…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

You and Fyodor love each other dearly, at the start of the relationship Fyodor would always be there for you, whenever you’d want something, he’ll give it to you! Oh no!!You’re crying? He’ll find out who made you cry and repent for their sins. Oh my, but look at your relationship now, Fyodor’s too busy with work and won’t give 1 single shit about you, he’ll even hurt you if you disturb him when he’s in a bad mood.

He thought that humans should learn a lesson if they made a mistake, whether big or small, but now, he’s contemplating if he’s God or not… seeing you lay unconscious on the floor makes him feel like he’s damned.. he went over to you and quickly got you some help. But my, my! when a doctor shouted “Go!! get more help!! we’re losing this patient!” Fyodor’s eyes went wide, he felt an uneasy feeling that made him regret everything he did to you.. he wanted to see you smile and laugh again, not see you with lifeless eyes and a neutral face expression. Fyodor would do anything to get you back, to make you show your contagious smile to him, to make you feel special, to get you everything you need and want, to never feel this guilty and uneasy feeling ever again.

……..

(after 1-2 hours)

The doctor walked to Fyodor and asked him, “Hello sir, are you Mrs. [name]’s relative? or someone close to her?” “I am her lover, is she doing okay?” Fyodor said to the doctor, trying to not make himself sound worried, “I’m sorry to inform you sir that she is in a critical condition and needs to rest in the hospital for a few weeks or months, until she’s stable and ready to go, she can get discharged from the hospital.” the doctor said. Fyodor asked if he could go inside your room, the doctor then said yes and let him enter your room, seeing you lay on the bed made him feel guilty for not being there with you. He sat on the chair near your bed, “The moon reminds me of your beauty. So beautiful yet so far away. Here I am wishing I could hold you in my embrace” he said, and then suddenly he jolt up when he heard your voice, “Fedya?? is that you?” as you said softly, trying to make yourself sit up from the bed, Fyodor helped you and then asked you, “Why? why must you do that? why did you try to kill yourself?” silence then filled the room, but it was broken by your response.. “Fedya, you almost never came home, we never do things together, I don’t care if you bought me something expensive, I just want to spend time with you! Why can’t you understand? Why did you have to hurt me whenever I disturb you? You could’ve just scolded me! You didn’t even care whenever I spent hours inside the bathroom crying, you didn’t even want to spend any time with me when you had the time to, it even looked like you didn’t love me anymore, Fedya..” you cried out to him, trying your very best to not break and have a meltdown. “Myshka, never do that again, I’m sorry you felt like that, I’m sorry that I made you feel like that, I’d do whatever it takes to make it up with you, please Myshka, never do that again..” Fyodor said, softly, you smiled at him and hugged him, sharing your warmth with him. “ I love you, Fedya, my heart goes around the moon everytime I see you.” you said to him, Fyodor chuckled, “Myshka, if God ever offered me eternal life, I’d turn him down, because life without you is nothing compared to death, I love you more, Myshka.” Fyodor replied to your words, making you flustered than ever, he then gently cupped your face and then kissed you, you widened your eyes and then returned the kiss to him. In the end, Fyodor will always love you, no matter whatsoever happens to you and him. “Please rest well and don’t make me wait too long, Myshka, I’ll be waiting for you until you are much better.” Fyodor said, you nodded and teased him about getting worried for you.

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[andmaybegayer]

Last Monday of the Week 2024-08-26

Documence...

Listening: Modest Mouse to fill some spaces. I am rather fond of This Is A Long Drive For Someone With Nothing To Think About so here's She Ionizes And Atomizes

Watching: Hosted a rare Good Movie Night, put on Baz Luhrmann's William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet, which is one of the best movies. It's so good. We had one person who hadn't seen it since school, and one person who had never seen it. Truly a great movie start to finish, more movies should just be Shakespeare plays!

I really like how it plays with line delivery, a lot of the Big Lines where a lesser performance would leave some space for a dipshit audience are brushed past in the context of their passages while other normally innocuous lines are elevated to an astounding degree. "Mercutio, thou consort'st with Romeo" is normally a pretty like, passing line, it's very easy to read it as part of the pre-game bickering of Mercutio and Tybalt, but here it marks the point where the game changes from idle banter to a serious accusation. A simply inspired line read.

I'm a huge tragedy lover. It's great how many times a character looks up and goes "hey does anyone else feel doomed". Yo these violent delights are coming to an end anyone know what comes next?

Reading: I have been occupied with obsessing over Documents so I have had Baru Cormorant on hold. Instead, mostly various blogs. One of interest is They Don't Make Readers Like They Used To

This is interesting especially since I've been the main sounding board for @thosearentcrimes reading lately and it makes some interesting points that might be wrong, as is common for this blog.

The key thesis is that readers engage more with the works they read now, but also they are more likely to challenge those works on their fundamentals, rather than anchoring themselves directly in the author's words first.

Some of this is definitely just that more people engage with media now, and it's more visible, is part of it, but that is also kind of the thing it's pointing at. More people are able to engage with media like this who would, I guess, have normally had to become writers in order to express these thoughts. Some of them did!

Playing: Tactical Breach Wizards is out! I am about halfway through the campaign.

It's very a tight tactical combat strategy game, especially if like me you are trying to be quick and efficient with your turns. You can absolutely kite enemies around a level for round upon round if you wanted to in most levels but it feels bad and it will eventually chip you down.

Because you can rewind within each turn but not successive turns you are kind of encouraged to keep your turns dense in action and low in number so that if you need to go back you aren't throwing away dozens of turns of state. Most levels pan out in 1-5 turns, which is small enough that you can memorize every action you took even with a larger squad.

The writing is Tom Francis Standard, mostly snappy quips, but the additional dialogue compared to, say, Gunpoint gives it some room to get a little more earnest. Which is nice.

Making: Bleh.

Tools and Equipment: Live Captions for Linux is an interesting little application that runs a CPU-based live transcription model locally to transcribe whatever is coming through your speakers, or whatever's coming in on the mic.

I've had it sitting on my computers transcribing podcasts, which I often listen to by routing my phone's bluetooth audio via the PC I'm sitting at. It provides a reasonably good glanceable transcript as well as a transcription history that is handy if I lose focus for a second. Rather than rewinding I can just take a look and see what I missed.

[eleanor-bradstreet]

Love to Spare - Part 5 (Anthony Bridgerton x Reader; Benedict Bridgerton x Reader)

Anthony Bridgerton x fem!Reader Benedict Bridgerton x fem!Reader Fluffy, friendship, angsty feelings! GIF by me Word count: 2k Part 4 Part 6 Masterpost Author's Note: Am I the terrible person that wrote Part 5 to be so long that I had to split it in half and now this will be 7 parts? Yes, I am that person. But it's all written - it's done. For real. 7 parts.

Summary: A season of suitors and a night at the opera.

You were an hour late in meeting Sir Edgar, having lost yourself in conversation with Benedict. You told him about your plans to teach and write and how they had been dashed by your family’s financial situation. He was sympathetic and supportive, his kind eyes sparkling as you spoke. When you asked him about his dreams in turn, he told you of his love for art, his penchant for sketching, and his hopes to distinguish himself with some kind of career. He was funny and inquisitive, listening so attentively that it was easy to open up to him despite barely knowing him. Where Anthony listened to you with all the insights of a clever colleague, Benedict seemed to listen with his whole heart.

Your subsequent conversation with Sir Edgar while strolling through the park was comparatively less stimulating. You spoke about your mutual acquaintances and the latest gossip of the ton, but neither of you turned inward to speak about yourselves in any meaningful way. You had the impression he was not the sort to even think to ask. Everything seemed very simple about him; simply pleasant, simply adequate, friendly and polite but lacking in passion. You convinced yourself that this could be a good quality in a husband. Someone who was quietly dependable, stable and calm, not prone to anger or jealousy or strong opinions. 

Two days later you received a parcel containing a small note and scroll of canvas tied with a blue ribbon. The note read:

I’m sure your home is filled with bouquets from suitors, but here is something to enjoy once they all wilt.

It was unsigned. Unfurling the canvas, you saw it was an oil painting of blue hydrangeas, bursting with color. Lining one stem were small, squiggled initials, ‘BB’. You displayed it beside Sir Edgar’s bouquet of roses, which were already turning black and shriveled, and felt something odd in your stomach each day when you admired it. But you didn’t send any reply, or acknowledge the gift when you later saw Benedict. You didn’t want to entertain any advance he may have intended with it.

Over the next several weeks, your parade through the ton and its annual events continued. You were guided through balls and garden parties, concerts and promenades, steered by Anthony into the company of Sir Edgar whenever he was present. You danced and chatted with other gentlemen who showed interest. Three of them even called upon you at home and left trinkets of affection, but Sir Edgar remained the least objectionable. You surmised that there wasn’t much objection because there wasn’t much of anything really. When a man said so little, there was little to take issue with.

Always on the fringes of your outings were Anthony’s brothers, Benedict and Colin. As your acquaintance deepened, you found that despite their similar appearance, their personas were very distinct. If Anthony was strength, Benedict was beauty. He always found ways to inject moments of joy into boring affairs; sneaking you glasses of champagne, or pulling you away from Sir Edgar to show you a vivid painting around a corner, or introducing you to acquainted academics, writers, and artists. You noticed that Colin often preceded him, calling Anthony away on some urgent matter just before Benedict appeared. You followed along in good humor, laughing on the edges of ballrooms, joining the Bridgertons at their picnic spot in the park, and debating artistic license with Benedict at each gallery opening. 

You consistently had to remind yourself that this was a friendship, just like the one you had with Anthony. But you couldn’t deny that each time you saw Benedict, something tugged within you, like a magnet within your chest pulling you in his direction. Try as you might to ignore such feelings, they could overwhelm you when your guard was down. Sometimes at night when you were falling asleep, hovering on the edge of consciousness, you would find yourself saying his name. You savored it on your tongue like a sweet you had stolen just for yourself to enjoy. Then in the morning you would chastise yourself, reminding yourself of all Sir Edgar’s good qualities and how he met your and Anthony’s criteria for a practical choice of husband.

Things progressed this way through the first half of the season. You knew matters with Sir Edgar were escalating when he insisted on holding your hand throughout an entire performance at the opera. It was the greatest affection he had yet shown and though perhaps a bit awkward, you supposed it was sweet in its own way. But you were distracted by the fact that the singer on stage was Anthony’s paramour, and you had a clear view of him in his family’s box above, looking as if he wanted to eat her alive. Whether that was passion or anger you couldn’t be sure, they were so entangled with those two. Just before the show ended, you saw him slip out of the box and disappear.

When crowds began to mingle in the foyer, Sir Edgar gave you a wide smile and stepped away to speak with your mother. You knew, without a doubt, that a proposal was imminent. Even though this was the intended outcome of your courtship, you suddenly felt yourself gripped with nerves. You wanted to speak with Anthony while your mother and suitor were planning your future nearby. His reassurance would put you at ease. You began to search for him in the hallways leading back toward the stage.

You heard Anthony before you saw him, one of three shouting voices echoing around a corner. Turning, you saw that he and the singer were yelling at each other over the shoulders of a large stagehand positioned between the two of them like a wall. The giant of a man was barking at Anthony to leave and looked about ready to trounce him. You felt certain that your presence was the only thing that stopped him because once the group saw you, they fell quiet. With a snarl, Anthony turned on his heel and began marching back toward you, nostrils flaring as he heaved with anger. 

“Anthony,” you chased after him.

“Not now, dammit!” He snapped. You both rounded the corner into an empty hall and he paused, looking at you with remorse though he was still panting with frustration. “I’m sorry.” His voice was anguished. “Y/f/n, I’m sorry.”

He was in no state to counsel you about your engagement, that was clear. You hated seeing him like this. You hated that his dalliance caused such maelstroms of emotions within him. But you had grown used to these moods, and you knew how to treat them. 

“Anthony,” You placed a gentle hand on his arm. “Take a breath and take yourself home. And don’t open a bottle until you get there.”

Exhaling heavily, he nodded in gratitude. “Will you come and join me, once you leave here?”

You almost reflexively said yes, but stopped yourself. The consequences of being seen alone with him at his home were significantly greater now that you could no longer be dismissed as just his solicitor’s daughter. You were a lady in society, and you had a serious suitor no less. A suitor who was waiting for you in the next room. You just then began to consider the impact your marriage would have upon your friendship with Anthony. Your meetings for brandy and banter would have to decrease if not stop altogether, as your time would be devoted to your husband. You didn’t know how you could continue to seek the comfort from each other that had become so reliable over the years. Now you felt even more conflicted about a proposal, a layer of sadness added to your nerves.

“I don’t know that it would be appropriate now, my lord.” You said sadly, reminding him of your stations. “I am spending the evening with Sir Edgar.”

He looked up at you, all of the same realizations clearly sinking in as his eyes grew somber. He nodded tightly. “Of course.”

“I will see you at tomorrow’s ball. Please take care of yourself.” You released him with a weak smile. His eyes full of pain, he returned a small bow, then walked briskly to a side door.

You wanted to stay with him. To try to convince him, once again, to find a new mistress and leave the drama of the opera singer behind, even knowing he wouldn’t do it. But your own love life and future were taking precedence that night. You each had your own feelings to sort, and could not do so together. You knew you’d have the opportunity to speak with him the next day. 

Crossing the foyer back to your mother, Benedict suddenly emerged beside you.

“Miss y/l/n! Have you seen my brother? Our mother is looking for him and naturally I am the one dispatched to retrieve him.” He flashed his tireless smirk.

You fought the little jolt within that you felt every time you saw him. “He has left for the night. I believe you’ll find him at his apartments.”

He frowned as he read your expression. “Is something wrong?”

You knew he was asking about Anthony, but you wanted to divulge all of your own feelings. You knew he would have listened. But with him being part of the reason you felt so odd about an impending engagement, you couldn’t say anything. “It’s not for me to say. But you should go to him.” If you could not be with Anthony, at least he could. “Be gentle with him, Mr. Bridgerton. Brandy and indirect questions should do the trick.”

His brows arched playfully. “Ah, you know the formula.” His grin brought one to your lips too. Then his face screwed up with confusion. “Wait, does that mean you visit him at his apartments?”

“Sometimes. Perhaps not anymore.” You sighed. “Why do you ask?”

His eyes grew intense, deeper somehow. “It’s just…I can’t believe our paths haven’t crossed before now. Or that he never said anything about you.” He was looking at you as if you were a precious artifact, something to marvel at. It rooted you to the spot, something buzzing down your spine. He stepped closer, and you looked up to hold his gaze as he towered over you. 

“Remarkable.” He whispered, so close that you could feel his breath on your skin. Then he murmured, almost as if to himself, “Can’t believe it’s taken so long…”

It was the warmth of his fingertips brushing yours that snapped you out of the spell and you all but jumped. “I must go.” You squeaked, then marched into the nearest cluster of people without a look back. 

You barely managed to catch your breath by the time you rejoined your mother and Sir Edgar. Your suitor smiled at you knowingly for the rest of the evening as you mingled with the theatergoers and slowly made your way home, walking under the lamplight. He deposited you at your doorstep and dropped a kiss on your hand before taking his leave. Your mother, eyes full of both hope and relief, confided that he had indeed declared his intentions to propose to you at the next night’s ball. 

It was settled then. In one day’s time, you would have a fiance, and your family’s future would be secure. You should have felt happy. You should have felt relieved. But all you could think about that night were Anthony and Benedict's eyes. Anthony’s so full of sorrow, a sorrow your marriage wouldn’t let you soothe any longer; and Benedict’s, glittering with some odd fascination. Surely you were reading too much into it with your silly infatuated emotions. You were an overeducated, undersocialized, secret friend of his brother and that made you an anomaly. It was time to stop thinking about him altogether. It was time to start distancing yourself from the Bridgerton brothers. You needed to prepare for the next chapter of your life as Lady Graham. That night, you stowed away the painting of the blue hydrangeas.

[yumemiyas-wips]

All of you SHUT UP and read this.

FULL TRANSCRIPT OF POST BELOW.

Two “rival” Chinese lesbian fic writers submit anonymous posts about each other on Weibo (Chinese twitter).

**I AM NOT the OOPs.** Two authors in the same lesbian fic writing community anonymously submitted posts to a Venting for Writers account on Weibo (https://t.co/BBxcEnSiJ4) (Chinese twitter). Source of the screenshots (https://twitter.com/juexias/status/1615339261611610115) in Chinese from @juexias on Twitter.

Mood Spoilers: CUTE, SWEET, WHOLESOME

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Submission by first author to the Venting for Writers account (https://twitter.com/silencedhawks/status/1615417962693033990?s=20) *Translations done by @silencedhawks on twitter.* — 27 December 2022

Both myself and another writer are quite famous within the same circle. We write and produce content at around the same speed. We don’t interact much between each other, but we have a bit of a little rivalry going on. For example, if she published a piece, tomorrow I have to publish one too. I can’t let her take up the trending spot on her own. We take up half of the trending spots without giving into each other, so we compete quite passionately against each other in secret.

But these two weeks I scrolled, and she didn’t appear, so I checked her profile and realized she was down with a very high fever and had been uncontactable. For a moment the Christmas gift fic I had became bland and tasteless.

When I finished reading, I was really scared. I immediately used my reader QQ account to ask her what happened and found out that she didn’t manage to snatch medicine in time and had been sick in bed for four days straight. After hearing that, I sent half a box of ibuprofen and fever reducers to her overnight. Now I just hope she’ll get better faster so I can properly and fairly beat her up. **The victory of being on top feels hollow when she isn’t here.**

And when she was lying in bed, I seriously thought it over. I concluded that her prose has too many irrelevant words and complicated sentences. What can be said in ten words she says in more than a hundred, apart from the complicatedness, it isn’t that good.

But compared to the others in the fandom, if I had to pick one, her writing is still more acceptable. Amen.

Response post (https://twitter.com/silencedhawks/status/1615423341594308608) by the second author (https://twitter.com/silencedhawks/status/1615423358556045312?s=20) (the one who got sick). *Translations done by @silencedhawks on twitter.* — 15 January 2023

Hello Bot, have some ibuprofen a reader sent me.

This is what happened: A week before Christmas, a lot of people from my school returned to their hometowns. On my way back, I caught COVID and fell sick, and ended up spending the entire Christmas in bed. I was really miserable during that time. I didn’t stock medicine. Even the fever meds I had were from begging my maternal grandma’s neighboring village. My family is a little special, I was brought up by my grandma. She’s getting on in years now and I absolutely don’t dare to let her take care of me.

With no one to take care of me and no medicine, the side effects of COVID left me bedridden and half-dead. Even after the fever went down on the third day, my head still felt like it was exploding with pain, like someone was prying it open from my temples all the way to my forehead.

After I felt a bit better, I decided to bury myself in blankets and check my phone to see how popular the fic I posted was, how many comments there were, in order to cheer myself up. I write in a small circle. Even though I’m not as popular as another writer who writes drabbles in the same circle, I have more comments and a very stable fanbase. Sometimes I manage to get on the rankings too.

There’s a reader who will always leave me meaningful comments on the content of each chapter and is very good at directly pinpointing what I wanted to convey. So I have a very distinct impression of her and later exchanged QQs with her. After exchanging QQs, I found out that she’s very lively and cute, like one of the cats I used to raise. Even through the screen, I can feel the lightness between her words. But she doesn’t use QQ often and is only online late at night.

Her command of language is very good. I asked her before if she would be open to collabing with me, but she said that she may not have the standards and time to churn out fic, and that the most she can do is some shallow writing. It was this reader that sent me medicine after hearing I got COVID. When she sent me the parcel number, it had only been half an hour since we talked.

The medicine had a paper note on it with nice handwriting. Below the note, four tablets of fever medicine had been used and there was still more than half the box of ibuprofen. After I received it, I asked how she would cope without it, and she told me two hours later that she still has medicine at her house. And she said that she was too busy these few days and forgot to say happy Christmas, so was a bit embarrassed. And she sent a very cute sticker, carefully asking me if she could make up for it with a belated Christmas wish. Actually, when I received the medicine, I was already half recovered. But I still deeply remember her Christmas greeting.

She said happy Christmas, and remembered that after she herself had gotten COVID her throat hurt, so she also gave me a box of lozenges and told me not to forget to eat them. **After all, you have to eat sweets during Christmas.**

In that moment I really couldn’t reply because I was crying. I was crying so hard that I scared my grandma. Even though I’ve explained many times, she still believes that the “friend” who sent me medicine is definitely a boyfriend that I haven’t told her about.

The story I want to tell ends here. When I was writing this, she was shopping for CNY (across province) goods with me. After her holidays started, she came online more often but still occasionally lost contact sometimes.

During those times I kept looking at my phone and thinking, **“If heaven exists, I hope we can meet each other in the future.” If it doesn’t, I’m willing to write for her forever.**

(Reddit OP here. These were anonymous submissions and we are unlikely to get any updates from here so I consider it concluded. Side note: The author who got sick has some insane charisma. Get it girl.)

[sinvulkt]

20 Questions For Writers

Wow, thank you so much for the tag @fanfictasia !! I've wanted to participate in something like this forever!! 🎶✨️✨️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Right now? 66.

"Yes, as a star wars writer, I am very proud of that. No, I do not intend to change it anytime soon."

I really need to focus on (and finish) some of my WIPs, and that mean trying not to disperse my energy amidst one shots (no matter how much i love monthly challenges and fic exchange events). Also I'm very proud of that 66 count and want to appreciate it xd.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

321k words!!

(More or less 100k / year 🎶 little me would never believe that 0.0

My school exam results sure don't, with how they are dropping 🤣)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star wars mostly (Vaderkin or my OC Sinvulkt), then Marvel (Dr Strange), Dream SMP (Dream), Le Visiteur du Future (Renard) and more recently Batman (Bruce Wayne) as well as Avatar: the last airbender (Zuko).

Plus the original stories I am supposed to write but almost never end up doing xd (the engagement in fandom compared to original stories make the switch hard xd).

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. Dreamt of a Never Ending Sky (Dream SMP)

669 kudos

2. To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars)

480 kudos

3. On the Edge of Twilight (Star Wars)

380 kudos

4. Scales of Embers (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

353 kudos

5. Crash Landing on Space Australia (Star Wars)

319 kudos

I'll never know how my Dream SMP fic got so much engagement. Good timing at a moment the fandom was in effervescence, I guess. Scales of Embers scoring so high is also a surprise 0.0. I discovered it had that many kudos today. It’s a shame the Dr Strange fandom is small because I think my Dr Strange WIP What If Doctor Strange Lost His Humanity ? would have deserved a place here. It definitely does in my heart.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! As a reader, I always feel super happy when the author shows that they’ve read and appreciated my comments. I know that personality an author who answers make me more likely to want to drop a comment.

As an author, I absolutely want to show how much I love every single comments, so I try to answer them all. But I get a little overwhelmed sometimes, bcs lots of other stuff going on irl or another reason. As such, it can happen that I don't feel the energy to answer a comment on the spot. And if I don't answer it on the spot (using the power of the wiggy dizzy nice happy feeling of getting a comment), I don't necessarily have the energy to answer later on. I currently have something like 60 unanswered comments I think? TT.TT

But rest assured that whether I answered or not, I absolutely adore and cherish every single ones!! Comments are amazing! ✨️.✨️

(This kind of engagement is one of the only reason I managed to settle into such an active rythm of writing after years of trying then dropping the hobby~)

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Glance at my fics.

Uhhh... This is a hard question here... Many of them have angsty endings XD

Mostly the ones at the beginning (the worst written ones xd). I wonder why~

Also a lot of them don' have endings yet XD

I'll say amidst the 'old' fics from 2021, Day 8 - Screaming (Star Wars) would be the angstier one (or most horrible one ig xd).

But as far as recent fic go... While I haven't finished writing it bcs its wordcount exploded in my face, I already plotted / drafted it a few months ago and I know the ending, so I'll choose:

Batman’s Downfall (To Stand Alone) (Batman)

I noticed my kind of angst doesn’t have much success around these parts 🫠🤣. Oh well. I cherish it all the same :3.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sometimes I think I wrote too many fics. It's hard to select one.

Uhhh... My fluffiest works are one shots in Of Feathers and Freedom serie, but they are part of the series so it’s not really an 'ending'.

...

I'll answer for the crackiest story rather than the happiest ending bcs all my finished fics ending are ominous open ending at best xd.

The Blob Adventures Of Excentrics Jedi (Star Wars)

Because it's cute blob drawings of our crazy team of OC in taaoej, and I love them (although we are all angst lovers in taaoej, so it's more crack-angst, and we don't know the ending bcs there isn't really one. Not yet at least. Hopefully never).

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

Just my own innervoice as far as I'm aware. But then I've always been rather clueless when people tried to 'hate on me'. The message usually just got lost somewhere in dreamspace immensity, never computing.

I've found the fandoms communities really welcoming at the very least!!

9. Do you write smut?

No.

I don't really enjoy reading smut. Nor romance for the matter. I don't think I'd enjoy writing it.

But maybe I'll try one day, for the sake of experimenting all genres.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I never did. I don't know why. Maybe I just never felt the need to mix characters and universes. There are amazing crossovers out there though, so who knows, maybe one day I'll try one.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of. In all honesty, I don't think my works are nearly popular enough to get stolen xd.

My writing style isn’t that good yet, and my dislike of romance when the majority of the fandom community is ship-powered means I end up in a corner quite niche. (A corner I love, that being said. Yay Crack, Angst and Gen~)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but maybe I'll translate some of mine in french someday. Be it only so that I do write fiction in my native language from time to time.

Anyone that wanna translate my fics, feel free to!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes, To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars)!!

I’m still waiting for my co-author @purpleopossum to come back to me / get back in star wars mood to continue that one. 🫠

Can’t say my hopes are that high up after all this time, but it’s the redemption | healing part of the serie and I don’t really have fun writing alone redemption | healing part... i prefer doing the whole mayhem that create the injury in the first place. And with how long some of my fics hiatus are (and I got no excuse for those xd), it’s only fair for me to wait. (I did write more other works for the dragon Vader serie in the meantime xd).

I made an oath to myself to never leave a work unfinished though, so we’ll see. If in several years purple still doesn’t wish to continue it, or if she inform me she is dropping the story, I’ll try to make some kind of ending. It’s part of the game i guess.

Alternatively, the The Amazing Adventures Of Excentrics Jedi universe is a group of star wars OCs that we made together with @pat-the-togorian , @asteral-feileacan , @ct2002-rema and Xylian. I don’t know if that count as co-writing? We usually write our OCs pov.

But in all cases, co-writting is very fun and I’d definitely do it again if other opportunities arise in the future.

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

The absence of ship is my all-time favorite ship. Otherwise, "main character / digging their own grave" would be my 'favorite ship' since I tend to synch with idiots snarky jerks disasters.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars) that I mentioned for question 13? 🤣

More seriously, I'll answer On the Edge of Twilight (Star Wars)

Because it's my vent fic. I know the main plot line, I vaguely know the current arc, but no one can predict where the next arc will go. It's all pure impulse and while I have a vague idea of 'ending', I refuse to plan a path towards it. This fic specifically, I want to keep pure impulse. So I'd love for it to become some kind of "The NeverEnding Story". :3

16. What’s your writing strengths?

I write.

No seriously, it's not something I did four years ago appart from vent poems here and there. Writing is in itself a huge writing strenght!

Otherwise I'm also a bottomless well of idea. It's pretty neat.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

... romance?

Or dialogues. Lastly I have a lot of frustration around the transition from dialogue / transition / dialogue. I feel like I'm crap at properly timing that.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's fun. I do it for games sometimes. Since apparently writing normally is not chllenging enough for my brain sometimes. It did teach me bits of mando'a.

Recently for Sēċan (Star Wars) I decided last minute to put the whole droid dialogue in morse, and I regret none of it.

I'm usually only doing it for one shots though, and never 'official existing' languages until now.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star wars :p

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Now that's another hard question, how am I supposed to select one.

I'm gonna answer the whole Of Feathers And Freedom (Star Wars) serie. Bcs wings. :3

Tag time~ (if you wish to)

@purpleopossum @pat-the-togorian @cinderfeather @beguilewritesstuff @purple-iris @dreaminghour @ravenite-void @trickstress333 @bluntblade @doctorgeekery @stewardofningishzida @jenae-0 @trickstress333 @kittonafoxgirl @pastelcourage @salparadiselost @kefalion @charlottevader @ravenstakeflight @starr234 @aelaer @sarcasticfirefighter @mckiwi @linzerj @sonderwalker @exomal @tonhalszendvics @nephilimswitchlight @firejay112 @only-here-for-the-star-wars @ajedilikehisfather @makaronik @chickadeechickadoo @dirtkid123 @numerousbees1106 @akizumy @25centsoda @udekai @wendingways @silvereddaye @in-company-of-misery @wisechaosglitter @kuraiarcoiris @alright-anakin @wyvunn you're more than welcome to join on the interview fun!! (Or to ignore the tagging if not interested xd).

I know I tagged. I lot of people. Some of you may recognise my pseud, some may not. But I thought it would be interesting to hear the answer of the various authors with whom I interacted on ao3 over the years, so I went and digged up those with tumblr I could find from my inbox 🤣

(Hopefully I didn’t bother any of you >.< - otherwise I apologize. Same for if I accidentally tagged a non-writer.)

I'd love to hear your answers! 🎶

[lostfracturess]

Hi! I'm a s&c reader and I really like the way you write! Your fanfic is very good and addictive, not only because of the events, but also because of the quality of the writing.

I was wondering if you have any writing advice?

Bye~

thank you so much!! of course, i've giving a few writing tips here before. here are more i can think of rn:

read yourself: by reading yourself (fanficiton or not) you become a better writer. immersing yourself in different styles and genres really broadens your understanding of writing and also let you explore what you enjoy and what not.

write regularly: practice makes a huge difference. don't get stuck on perfectionism in your early drafts (which i'm terrible at). just getting words on the page is the first step.

find your voice: your unique way of putting words together is what makes your writing stand out. don't be afraid to experiment with tone and language. you don't have to have everything set from the start, you can explore and have fun with language as you go!

i've been experimenting a bit the last few chapter with s&c with my writing myself and make it more "visceral" or how you would call it, like really gripping and "ugly" in the way you describe feelings.

i think r. f. kuang (poppy war trilogy) does this so excellently and i really like her writing style. she was always a big inspiration for me.

plotting: some writers like detailed outlines, while others prefer to discover their story as they write. when i get stuck with writing i often plot more. than i think it's easier to write but also i'm so impatient and just want to write instead of plotting... so you'll have to experiment to see what works best for you.

reverse plotting:  if you're stuck with plotting, start with the ending you want and brainstorm how your characters might arrive at that point.

specificity over generalities: instead of "big tree," can it be a "towering oak" or a "gnarled willow"? instead of "nice day," describe the "crisp air" and "bright sunshine." this makes the scene more vivid for the readers.

add sensory details: don't just tell the reader what's happening, describe what it smells, tastes, sounds, and feels like.

don't be afraid of using the word "said": maybe it's just me but some authors shy away from that, which i get because it reads so repetitive but i rather read "said" a few times in a scene with a lot of people, instead of loosing sight of who said what.

notes on your phone: often i get random thoughts and i then have to immediately write them down in my notes app because otherwise they would slip again out of my brain. so whenever you have a good scene in mind or see something (in a movie or what) you like, just write it down and come back to it later.

vary sentence length: mix of long sentences and short, impactful sentences creates a rhythm in your writing. a lot of long sentences in a row can feel slightly boring otherwise. try to break it up with some short ones in between.

ask yourself questions: does this scene help the plot? or is it just for fun? what should the reader know after this scene? or with what feeling should the reader be left? is this character's motivation clear? this will help you identify potential weaknesses in your writing.

lastly but most importantly! don't compare yourself to others: it's so hard to not compare yourself with other, i know that myself all too well, but writing is a journey and for most of us a hobby. focus on writing what you really like and celebrating your successes, no matter how small!! ♡

hope these will help you a bit! sending you love ♡