#i feel like ive regressed quite a bit :(

[kwyoz]

drawing random references with my inky

[nyancrimew]

You do a lot of really cool stuff and you do it As You. How do you overcome the fear of being Perceived and Known? Especially when the stuff you're raising awareness about is controversial or big? I have anxiety and while the "fuck it we ball" mindset has gotten me fairly far, I still find myself regretting putting myself out there or regressing back into a shut in.

i feel like what helped me kinda deal with getting pretty well known is probably not really applicable to many other people, because most of it really was that ive just been slowly more and more exposed to a bigger and bigger level of fame since i was like 16 or so. long before i was at the point i am now i was a really well known person in the android modding community and then the broader and broader tech community, i definitely didn't deal super well with some of my first minutes of fame and there's lots of stuff i regret (i def let it get to my head for a while and because i was also slowly burning out at the time i was quite an asshole to a lot of people). i don't think that was necessarily the best for me at the time, but i learned some lessons especially about community building and i did a lot of media work already at the time so ive been honing my communications skills for almost 10 years at this point.

i first started blowing up with hacktivism related stuff around 2019, and then everytime i did again it was bigger and bigger, making massive international headlines for the first time in 2021 (with the verkada story). i still fucked up a lot and got very stressed at that time, especially with my mental health being extremely abysmal and paranoia growing as state repression became inevitable.

after the indictment in 2021 i did more and more press work again (there are lots of portraits of me from that era) but still wasn't like A Celebrity except for those brief moments, which (as i took a break from hacktivism) gave me some more time to grow and learn. by the time the no fly list hack happened in 2023 i had been spending a few months already doing various smaller cyber security related work and working with many of my journalist friends in the industry. in a lot of ways the no fly list leak and the media reaction to it was just routine work for me already at that point, which i think allowed me to take in all the social fame way better as well. it still all felt quite surreal, but i was already mostly media trained, had quite a bit of experience with working with an audience already so it was just kind of a matter of adapting to my new environment.

this isn't to say i was like specifically working towards fame (especially this level) but ive always cared about community/audience building and media communication. i don't think im like "fake" or whatever, but you do have to consider that despite my laid back style im still someone with an autistic special interest in personal branding and media communications. i just don't wanna do that for corporations or for profit and instead use it for my activist and journalist self advocacy to give things a platform.

[softspace-fics]

Hiiiiii I just read your new loki fic with a disabled little and I was amazing to read especially when it's relatable like that I have a bad relationship with my health 😅

If your comfortable with it I really feel that a stucky x disabled little would be a perfect match cuz bucky is disabled (just in a cooler way with the vibranium arm) and iv been reading how you write bucky and Steve and they just want what's best for they're little so I need to read them helping the reader be more comfortable with they're disability.

You can ignore this but I just wanna say I love your blog and I hope your having a great day

-🦄

Hurts.

Masterlist - All my work!

A/N - hiii! I am so sorry your request took a little bit because I wanted to make it similar yet different to my story "It's hard." because everyone's experience with pain and why they don't feel comfortable with others when in pain, or for why they have bad relationship with their health is completely different. I wish I could include everyone in each post, and if you'd like to share your story with me I'd love to know, your never alone in your battles. If you have any feed back please let me know!

Warnings⚠️: mentions of rough family life, parents saying meds should fix the pain, ignorance of how pain affects someone, negative regression, mentions of bucky in hydra but nothing significant, please let me know if I missed anything!!

Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes x Little!Reader

___________

Bucky understood what it was like to be in unbearable pain, feeling like your entire body was being ripped to shreds. He had been stuck being experimented on for how long? When he told Steve about how he felt on a daily basis even after not being experimented on for a while, Steve did his best to learn how to help him out when the pain just made it unbearable.

This meant that steve tried hard to figure out the best ways to help anyone who was in severe amounts of pain. He tried epsom salts, different type of ointments, mental care, anything he possibly could think about to make bucky comfortable. 

So when they met you, you didn’t seem out of the ordinary for them, to them you were seen as such sweet person and you were pretty confident. When people would talk to you, you helped them out if you could, or were polite in saying you couldn’t. 

You had originally met the two in a library when Steve and Bucky were looking for different types of books to try and learn more about the world today. You were trying to reach for the book on the highest shelf, and pain was shooting through every fiber in your body. You were exhausted and uncomfortable when you saw Steve's shadow behind you and got spooked. You jumped and nearly fell over from moving too quickly off your tippy toes. He gently grabbed your arm to stabilize you before smiling at you and apologizing for scaring you.

He asked if you needed help with getting the book off the shelf and you quietly said yes. It was one of your favorite childhood books, you read them sometimes when you regress, although  he didn’t need to know that. You felt bad making him do it for you, even though he asked. You know it wasn’t anything significant but you had never been able to accept help. 

Your family barely paid any attention to your pain, you were thrown on meds that did nothing when you were a kid and they stopped caring. Everytime you said something you always got “Well, did you take your meds?” “Your meds worked yesterday, don’t lie to me” Meds this, meds that. It got to the point you stopped taking meds and never asked your parents for help with your pain. 

When you were able to finally get into doctor offices by yourself you got meds that helped somewhat, but you still never felt as if you could rely on anyone else to help with your aches and how you felt on the inside. You had meds which meant that you should be fine and learn to deal with the pain on your own. Right?

You had seen the duo in the bookstore quite often after the first interaction, learning they were together and they were shocked when you told them you had no clue who “captain America” or the “winter soldier” was. You never really payed attention to the world outside of your bubble, you couldn’t relate to a lot of people so you shut off a lot of the outside. 

Eventually they asked you out, and from then on is history. But something you still hadn’t told them about was the chronic pain, and the regression that came from it. You had times where getting out of bed was the worst idea ever, showering was beyond out of the question, and regression was the only option your brain had.

You’d regress young enough that you could toddle and make it from point A to point B, but past that you had no survival when you were in so much agony. This means there became times you didn’t eat for hours, you’d sleep longer than you should, and there would be times you didnt respond for hours to anyone.

Bucky and Steve got super worried on days you never replied, they tried to let you have your space, thinking that it was something that you just did, but when you didnt show up for a date at their place, they ran over, thoughts racing.

They knocked on your door which woke you up, but you had no energy to attempt in getting up. Not knowing it was them, you assumed it was a package and tried to go back to sleep when they knocked louder.

Steve continued to knock while bucky prayed that you had left a key outside to your apartment incase you lost yours. He looked under a brick and practically ran to get your door open. Thank god that he remembered people put keys under rocks.

When they got in the apartment, the quickly rushed to find you. Scanning and worridly running around.

“Y/N??” Steve shouts, checking the bathroom.

“Sweetheart?!” Bucky yells as he opens the door to your room, where he finds you crumpled in pain, your room darker than a cave.

“Please, stop screaming.” You mumble quietly, you clutch your stuffie to your chest, your regression starting to set in after being brutally awaken.

Bucky quickly comes and sits by your side, helping to pull the blanket away from your face, looking at you with complete and utter concern.

Steve eventually comes in with some things in his hands, bucky looks at him puzzled before connecting the dots.

See, Bucky found you, but Steve found your regression and safe room. Where you had soft toys and padding everywhere. It was something you had filled with everything that you could need for when your regressed, and when it hurt too much to move.

The two knew what age-regressors were from tony, seeing as him and Stephen were the proud caregivers of Peter and Wanda. So when Steve saw your pacifier and heating pads, and anything else that might help, he grabbed it all.

“Baby, can you tell us whats wrong?” Bucky softly asks, tucking your hair behind your ear, Softly rubbing your thigh with his thumb.

“Hurts.” you mumble out softly, you slowly flip over, and bury your face into bucky's stomach. His scent fills your lungs, and he slowly starts to rub your back, holding you closely. 

Steve comes up behind Bucky, his face contorted to a face of his own pain. He hated seeing you so upset, and mowing you were trying to fend for yourself, by yourself, hurt him.

“Do you want your pacifier darling?” Steve gently asks, he wasn’t sure if you knew he had found your room, and wasn’t wanting to freak you out.

Hearing him ask that question, you looked up from bucks embrace with pure terror. How did he find it? Why was he so calm about it?

Bucky softly cupped your cheek and kissed your forehead before pulling you back into his embrace, rubbing small circles on your back before he speaks calmingly.

“Doll, we know about regression or age-dreaming, there's nothing to be afraid of, we promise.”

You relax into his hold before slowly nodding. Steve hands you your paci and you slide it between your lips and just rest against bucky, the pain minorly subsiding with the extra pressure of his hug.

“Baby, I know that the pain can be hard to handle, but you don't have to go this alone, you'll never be alone now that we're here. Whatever we can do, we want to do it. Please never feel as if you have to fight this battle alone.” Bucky manages to barely whisper out, fighting his own emotions.

Your tears begin to fall, hearing words you've never heard before. You’ve had to fight by yourself for so long, that maybe them knowing wasn't for the worst.

“Your not alone anymore, never alone. We're with you now. The pain doesn't have to be suffering anymore, let us help.” Steve sits next to you and buck, rubbing your back and leaving little kisses on your head.

You slowly nod, wanting someone to be there, maybe this time, you'll be able to accept the help. The right help.

[0little-miss-scare-all0]

General Dethklok/Managerial Headcanons :3

A/N: this may or may not be dry asf i'm writing b4 the hcs so i don't forget😭😭

this is NOT proofread

Nathan Explosion :

i think he's like 6'5

its just this weird hunch i have

definitely somewhere from 28-35

i don't make the rules man😔

obviously Native American from the whole bloodlines episode

i can't remember what it's called for the life of me😭

i don't have any other nationality hcs for him

i think the show does it well enough

has gauges idc

they probably aren't hella big, but they're there

maybe an industrial or some kind of cartilage piercing

i think his favorite song they've made is Mutilation on a Saturday Night

it makes him think of early dethklok without the prophecies and shit

favorite album is the Dethalbum

probably has a bias bc it's the first project they did (totally not projecting rn😭)

song that makes me think of him is Ugly Model Mannequin by Cane Hill

idk why, it just does

Skwisgaar Skwigelf :

he's 6'10 NO ONE can convince me otherwise

his tagline isn't "taller than a tree" for nothing man

i saw someone say that Brendon himself said Nathan and Skwisgaar are the same age, so i'm not touching on that

biggest Swede ever man

like he quite literally had the Swedish flag on his belt buckle in Doomstar Requiem

go look it up i'm not joking

but maybe his dad is from like Switzerland to make him a slight bit more interesting

i doubt that he'd have any piercings

maybe his ears but that's it

i just cant see him with anything crazy

someone mentioned an elf ear body mod for him

makes sense that fairy

that last one was uncalled for hold on😭😭

this guys favorite song is awaken

he just loves the instrumentals

the little do-do-do-do do do do do do they do

idk how to explain it just go give it a listen😭

favorite album is the Dethalbum III

i think he likes how all the songs sound similar, so it isn't hard to remember the riffs (don't mention my terminology i am the farthest thing from a guitarist😭)

song that reminds me of him is Viking by Slaughter to Prevail

i just think he relates to the whole viking lineage thing

also the breakdown goes HARDDD

Toki Wartooth :

maybe like 6'1

this is going off gut feeling, not anything related to the show

i think he's like 25

he didn't look that old in Doomstar Requiem

the type of guy to sneak in like 20 cats and give them treats to not make noise

i think he regresses to like 6-7

idk why i just think yk

i think he also has gagues

they're probably white

he totally has an eyebrow piercing that pickles did in like 1900 BC that he didn't want anymore so he just let that hoe close

i think with the way his family is he would just be 100% Norwegian

no ifs not buts

might know some Latin

probably just prayers and shit like that

his favorite song they've made is Dethharmonic

or the Deththeme

for Dethharmonic he likes the orchestral elements

for the Deththeme he just likes that his name is first😭

i'd say his favorite album is the second one

just bc the album cover is purple, literally no other reason

probably bc it stands out from all other death metal albums

purple probably isn't considered a "metal" color (it should be though)

a song that reminds me of him is Summer Breeze by Type O Negative

i think he'd appreciate how chill it is

Pickles the Drummer :

bro easily 5'6-5'8

he's a short king

Wisconsin 100% his family is from no where else

like the drummer family goes back to the 13 colonies

obviously he has four piercings

those eyebrow ones

i think he has some on his ears

cartilage but not industrial

his favorite song they've made is Hatredcopter

he just loves how he sounded and the drums (based)

i forgot to say how old he is

he's the oldest, so i'd say like 39

they're not allowed to be 40 bc i said so

i think his favorite album is Dethalbum IV

it just makes him proud to see how far they've come since Dethalbum I

a song that makes me think of him is Wrong Way by Sublime

and Your Mama Won't Know by Pretty Boy Floyd

he's most definitely taunting TF out of the band with that "mom" shit

"go get mommy a bottle" "give mommy the remote"

he's insufferable (i would be too)

William Murderface :

he's 5'10 and i HAVE to be firm on that

probably like 30

MAYBEEE 33 if i feel generous

he hates pickles

the food, not the drummer

along with Toki, he also loves Christmas

it just "isn't brutal" so he won't admit it

he's like a 5 year old when that shit rolls around

that's why he wanted that special so damn bad

his favorite album is also Dethalbum IV

he just loves the new sound

a song that reminds me of him is Subliminal by Suicidal Tendencies

i feel like he'd like their whole self titled and Lights... Camera... Revolution

i cant speak for all of Freedumb, bc i only listen to Cyco Vision, but he'd like that song too

i get a big Murderface vibe from them

maybe it's the whole punk thing

and Murderface being a Nihilist

it just ties it all together with a nice big blood red bow

i think hes latino like i've seen everyone say

he can probably speak Spanish well

speaks the Spain dialect (i'm not very educated about this tell me all abt it in either reblogs or comments)

Charles Offdensen :

he's like 6'2 or 6'3

i cant decide

i think it would be so funny if he was like 40 and the band made him seem 56

in reality he's probably like 42

that seems right to me

went to some high end law school

i'm pretty sure that's when they said he jousted

idk i just remember he can do it

i like to think he's wasian

Korean and Swiss if we wanna be specific

he grew up in American bc i love my country✊🏻😔😔

anyway, i say wasian bc he has a monolid i think

at least it looks like it to me

maybe it's just his glasses hiding it who knows

probably from the middle of buttfuck nowhere

like some place in Oregon

his favorite album is the Doomstar Requiem soundtrack

IDC WHAT YALL HAVE TO SAY

i think he likes how fun it is

and is very cocky about how good his parts are

his favorite song tho is Poisoned by Food

the opening scream is his shit

a song that reminds me of him is Visage by LANDMVRKS

it's kind of quiet at the beginning which helps him lock in for the rest of the song and all the songs after it

probably listens to metal all day, then goes to bed and listens to some goth shit

maybe even classical if he's feeling posh

wasn't raised religious, but still celebrated the holidays

the christian ones specifically

a canon fidgeter

in Dethdinner he was wiggling his fingers

thank you to that one charles lover with the spreadsheet of his behaviors i forget their handle

they pointed it out and i've geeked abt it ever since

Abigail Remedlindrinc :

don't quote me on her last name i cant spell that fuckin thing😭

i think she's like 5'8 easily

probably 34

not much older than Murderface but definitely not younger

shes probably from somewhere normal like Pittsburgh

ofc i say where i'm from for normal

anyway she's definitely not from PA idk what i was on abt

i cant think of a specific place she'd be from

i feel bad i don't have much for her i love her sm

she probably still has Nathan's number saved

in my heart they're still best friends

in canon god does she hate him

she's just so amazing i love her

Dick Knubbler :

this man omfg

he's like 5'10 too

maybe 5'11 on a good day

he looks old

maybe like 40

up there with charles 100%

hes such a goofy mf i hate him

but like i hate him lightheartedly

my dad loves him he thinks he's funny

he looks like the type of mf to talk in his sleep

he definitely rolls around a lot too

has to have a big ass bed or his frail ass will fall off

i think of him when i hear any pop song from the 80s

like Taylor Dayne, and Prince even though i think he was 90s

idk man i wasn't alive😭

[babyzzai]

bungo stray dogs cglre labels ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

note: she/her pronouns for sigma bc thats a girl 🤞🏻this will be in all of my posts, im a tfem sigma truther.

atsushi- flip with no lean // i feel like atsushi needs to vent his feelings by regressing, and has a deep desire to be loved and cared for since he never received that love and care when he was really a child, and i also think thats the reason hes a caregiver! he wants to love and care for and protect others the way he wishes he couldve been, its very healing for him. his regression age is 4-5! i also believe he regresses to some kind of pet- im gonna say probably a tiger because im basic, but specifically a tiger kitten, and i like to think if he transforms into byakko when regressed its just a baby tiger kitten 😭💕

dazai- regressor // dazai has cptsd from the mafia and for reasons we probably dont wven know as the audience, and i think hes a trauma regressor because of that. hos regression age is 0-2. i like to see him as a pet regressor as well, and hes OBVIOUSLY a little kitten! i saw someone headcanon him as otter regressor too and im never gonna leave that alone either so hes a kitten and an otter

kunikida- CAREGIVER!! he just strikes me so smack in the face as a caregiver. with kunikidas trauma from when he was a teacher it makes me think hed cope by taking care of kids/regressors, to prove to himself in a way that the kids’ deaths werent his fault. i also think he funds comfort in giving rules and schedules to his littles, when youre any sort of caregiver, even with literal kids, kids need structure, and being able to provide that structure would make him feel secure. i also think he loves all littles ofc, but has a preference for babies.

ranpo- oh. this man is a regressor all. the. way. // i think ranpo regresses for two reasons. one, because hes traumatized from his parents’ sudden deaths at a young age and the trauma he endured from living on the streets, and two, because hes autistic! i think ranpo is a permaregressor as well!! his regression age is 6-9! also a puppy and a kitten regressor!

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akutagawa- i think hes a regressor // however i dont think he likes to admit it, and i dont even know if he understands it. he also is a puppy regressor, specifically a doberman.

chuuya- flip with caregiver lean!! // chuuyas label is VERY important to me omg. i believe chuuya is moreso of a caregiver because its just in his nature. hes a very caring, loyal person, and he wants to make sure that those he loves are safe from harm. growing up with the sheep as their king, he needed to care for them and watch out for them, especially little kids, so its kind of just ingrained into him to take care of others. however, i think also when chuuya is really stressed and has had a hard day/hard time he needs to let go and be little! when he does regress, his little age is 4-5! absolute puppy regressor as well, hes just a little baby doggie! he LOVES doggies when regressed too, his fav show is paw patrol <2

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poe- i think poe is also neutral // idk ive just never felt strongly about him being either a caregiver it a regressor.

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fyodor- neutral // i cant see him in a caregiver role at all, and i can kindaaaa see him being a regressor but i just think its not all that fitting imo

nikolai- hes a regressor!! // and oh boy is he a mischievous one- nikolai in my mind is a bit older, about 8-10, and hes quite the chaotic kid haha. he LOVES to play pranks, scream at the top of his lungs, and when hes being taken care of he LOVSS to do magic shows too!! i kinda wanna make a post about my little nikolai hcs now… :3 i think honestly nikolai is just a silly guy, he needs a place to get all that silliness out! and thats by being a kiddo!!

sigma- flip with no lean // i dont know why but sigma just gives such mother energy. like i can imagine her loving her little calling her mama, and snuggling into her chest, and giggling softly into her hair. theres no logical reasoning i have i just feel it in my bones lol. but i think shes had a stressful life, and she has a lot of things she needs to process, ie. being born from the book, not knowing who she is or where she came from, dealing with the angels, etc. and i think in order to makeup for her not being aware of any sort of childhood she regresses to around 2-3 to make those memories and experience the childhood shes not sure if she ever even had. i can see her as a bunny regressor too!!

[zebulontheplanet]

Hello

I am so sorry if this not good to ask/ the right place to ask (idk how tumblr works yet). Please lmk if so and i will not do it again /gen.

I am concerned I may be exhibiting signs of catatonia. I know it is not smth to be self dxd and is very serious but I can't find a huge amount of useful things online and idk what to do so i thought id ask you so i can get a better idea of whether to seek professional help seeing as you have lived experience with it. I hope that's okay

I have slowly been losing skills over the past year (not in burnout). Ive lost a lot of maskjng ability, I find speaking harder and often talk like a younger child despite my advanced vocabulary as a result, I get stuck on tasks and now need physical or verbal prompting to do a lot of tasks like bADLs i didnt need this for before (not counting iADLs bc i dont need to do those because im 15, nearly 16, altho i doubt they would be better). My sensory issues have worsened and so have my meltdowns and shutdowns (which were already not great). I have episodes where I feel like I literally cannot move and my body won't move or will only move very slowly or jerkily. It is like it won't process what my brain is telling it to do. I also stim more often and far more noticeably. Idk who to go to. :(

What other overall areas does catatonia cause decline in - for example does it cause social skills to decline, etc? I've noticed my social skills worsening quite a lot too which is why i ask.. the stuff ive found online can be a bit vague/ confusing or not what i want to know.

I'm scared because idk what is happening and it's really confusing. You don't have to respond to this and I'm sorry for rambling.. is it worth going to a professional? Can this kind of thing be caused by other stuff? If I were to go to a professional it would probably take ages because the waitlists are so long here. I'm just really confused and kinda scared and I dont want to lose more skills :(

Hello, so regular catatonia is different from autism catatonia with regression. Catatonia is very serious, and if you believe you are having it then PLEASE seek out medical attention. Autism Catatonia is usually regressive, and gets worse with time without treatment. Which, I am personally experiencing and it’s the reason I’m on medication for it.

Catatonia is a very serious condition, and can be life threatening in some. So it’s important to know the warning signs and contact a professional. Do NOT wait and contact someone as soon as possible.

Regression is hard, but regression doesn’t mean catatonia. So if you think you’re experiencing regression then that doesn’t automatically mean you have catatonia, if that makes sense. Catatonia for me is episodes of complete freezing, and episodes of slowness. Even outside of tasks I have catatonia. Although tasks are a huge trigger for my catatonia.

Please don’t try and self diagnose it and seek out medical help. I hope you have a lovely day and get the help you need. ❤️

[dragon-queen21]

gulp.. mob psycho worms taken over the noggin raah

anyway mobs and ritsu are baby brothers i have to say it

(also sorry its been a bit, ive been very unmotivated)

-mobs and ritsu are definitely two low energy littles for different reasons;

mob is just a little whos just naturally quiet and low energy. when hes little, its quite hard to tell because of how similar he acts when hes big to when hes little. but! the boy has tells! definitely when hes little he will subconsciously start floating things around.

ritsu. oh boy ritsu. when this boy is little hes DONE. his regression time is his resting time. regressing is his one, ONE, healthy coping mechanism let him have it dammnit!!!

-i cant tell what ages the two of them would regress too, but definitely young. mob would probably still have that “big brother energy” though. ritsu would still carry that deep protectiveness over his brother too, even if hes to young to do more than cling to mob and make baby noises.

-REIGEN AND DIMPLE ARE THEIR CGS LET ME COOK!!!!

reigen takes up the job with the idea that, hes known the boys since they were 11 and 10 alike. so this cant he THAT hard.. what he didnt think about, was two unstable espers that are, when regressed, more prone to stronger emotions, which leads to a lot of broken mugs and vases in the office much to his dismay. but aside from that, reigens actually a pretty good caregiver. after the first time mob actually regressed in front of reigen, he made sure that his little emotional unstable child had everything he needed when he was in baby mode. (honestly you can probably give mob a pacifier and figet toy and he’d be content. very easy baby to please)

like usopp, i feel like reigen would be actually decent at story telling and during the times both ritsu and mob are regressed at the office, reigen could be .. persuaded to tell them one.. or two.. ah maybe three if their not busy..

^ritsu still TOTALLY has it out for reigen when hes little. youve never seen a kid with a more dangerous death stare ESPECIALLY to their caregiver. reigen.. reigens had to grab and hold up both the boys by the back of their shirts like kittens more than once.. uhh.. for why you can make that up.

when it comes to dimple, he takes care of them if reigens not around, like if one or both of them are little at home, thats when its dimples job. (both the boys are flips too and will take care of the other if their little.) like reigen, hes not that bad at it, but i feel like hes way more worried about their safety considering he cant directly stop them since hes a spirit.

OKAY THATS ITS THIs is SO LONG BUT I LOVE THEM

📷

Eyy!!! Mob psycho! I have currently been binge reading (aka I read two mangas back to back) One’s other series One Punch Man. I have the next book currently of mob psycho and your comment reminded me that I need to go and read it :3

~Ahh! baby space Ritsu clinging to Mob and refusing to let go. Absolutely not. You can pry his brother away from him over his dead body

~ Yes yes yes yes yes! Cooking with ya-and adding to it of course :3

~Hear me out- Caregiver Dimple, but he’s human. Not like in he’s possessed someone type way, but like he has a human form he can shift into, or he just is human, I don’t know- I don’t care, I just crave. Being able to hold the two little ones. The very definition of the cool uncle

~ “he made sure that his little emotional unstable child had everything he needed when he was in baby mode.”

<- kfbdkndjsn love that

~But also Mob vent regressing for the first time. Trying to deal with a melt down, papers, vases, chairs, etc. flying around the room, keeping Ritsu calm, and comforting the poor boy.

~Oh my gosh they would end up scruffed like kittens. I love that.

~Ritsu would be the type of kiddo who’s caregiver tells him no “because I said so.” And he will now make it his sole mission to do whatever it is he was told not to do. But only with Reigen. Dimple tells him no and he’s a bit more cooperative.

Thank you for all the ideas! Made my day reading this :D

[grumblengrowling]

Introductory file

My name is Abble Grumble, or Apple Crumble! Tecnically, neither is my actual name as I wish to be anonymous, so feel free to come up with a nickname if it's easier! I have a main blog that I follow from, so dont be alarmed!

My pronouns are whatever for noww.. she/he/they/it and anything you can think of is A-okay!!!

Considering this is an agere blog, I should prolly specify some things for you! My average regressed age is about seven to five to ten years old, but I'm an assisted regressor so I only COMPLETELY regress when prompted or 'assisted' into slipping by someone or something. This means regressing fully is kind of uncommon? I usual get stuck at a middleish point of regression, sadly!! Sometimes typing is hard, and I forget how things are spelt or make typos, im sorry :(

Also also!!!!!! Some more importants!

I am bodily a minor!!! I dont mind anyone being my friend at all, but i know some people dont like being pals with people tooo young, so i thought I'd mention it!

Im a kin of other characters, but there is too many to mention,,

I am also a fictionkin! Namely, the ones youll see me as more often on here are;

Mabel Pines (gravity falls)

Grumbot (hermitcraft)

the collector (owl house)

Vee noceda (owl house)

Lilo (lilo and stitch)

Dapper (qsmp)

SunnySideUp (qsmp)

Powder (arcane)

I'm perfectly fine w sourcemates getting in touch with me whether you're a kin, a fictive, an introject, a copinglink, an irl, or any other related form!! Send me an ask!! I might be a little shy at first though, i get nervous easily :(

My selfships on this account are all FAMILIAL AND/or PLATONIC.

My F/o list is underneath this little bit of text. But first, I'd like to clarify! Im perfectly fine with sharing in all forms, and Im happy to talk to anyone who selfships romantically with my familial f/o's!

My f/o's are;

Grian (family - hermitcraft)

Scar (family - hermitcraft)

Mumbo Jumbo (family - hermitcraft)

This is subject to update! Im also quite new to the yumeship/selfship community so forgive me!!!!!!

Fact sheet!!!!!!!!!

My favourite colour is RED!!!

If i had to pick between all the flavours (salty, sour, spicy, sweet, bitter, savoury,) Id choose sweet first and savoury second! My last choice would be bitter, im not a big fan!!

I have a potty-mouth im trying to fix (means i swear alot but dont want to anymore!), so please feel free to correct me! A small "language!" Or "watch your tongue!" Is fine!

My favourite songs at the minute are "squares" and "y 13" by Cavetown!

I really like red apples, but not green ones!!!

Im a big fan of sanrio <3 my favourites are bad badtz-maru and hana-maru !!

I like wearing colourful socks!!

Im from england!!

I really really like the serieses octonauts, wild kratts, paw patrol and sesame street !

I draw as a hobby, and ive been an artist for over 5 years now :3

I really like baking, and despite my account theme, ive never actually tried apple crumble before!

(This was mainly written regressed and I'm too tired to fix it, sorry!)

[flockofdoves]

i was out as trans a a middle schooler and long before anyone else i knew at school etc. ever came out as trans. id like to think that even as the specifics of how i navigate my identity have changed throughout the years, that i've been pretty in touch with myself for most of the past fucking. 13 years when it comes to gender stuff and don't consider myself to be repressed in that way or anything.

but as time goes on its silly but i sometimes feel so weird comparing myself to a bunch of people i know who realized they were trans and came out way after me who are way way further in transition while i've still done nothing to physically transition and still waffle about wanting to do it perfectly and at the right time

and i know i didnt like Actually regress in my understanding of myself and i do actually find joy in being a woman through the context of being a lesbian, but i hate how that combined with still not physically transitioning in any way and not having as many unambiguously masculine clothes that are my style that fit me anymore and giving up on binding because of health issues/comfort/weight change/etc and growing out my hair (which genuinely has been an interesting or satisfying experience in some ways to learn how to take care of my hair but maybe long since has outserved me by now) and being indifferent moment to moment about what pronouns or gendered terms people use for me have all combined together to make me so fucking cis woman adjacent. and like yes i'm fine with being referred to as a cis woman and contextually sometimes describe myself as such and i'm like individually fine with most of these separate contributing factors but all together i cant take it anymore theres just too many contexts in my life where the balance is so off and people can totally ignore anything trans about my identity and i don't want that i want to be visibly gender non conforming i want to take t and get top surgery its so so so unreal that i feel less trans than i used to be and all of that history is just totally invisible to anyone who hasn't known me that long

i understand all of my reasoning and why i've made the decisions i've made and am in the position i am and but also its so strange realizing how despite all that a lot of the time i feel like the things i say sound so similar to the types of things me and other long out trans people affectionately joke about people who haven't quite accepted themselves as trans yet doing. and i know part of that is because of course any joke is gonna flatten real life experiences and peoples internal worlds a bit, but still maybe the point of the comparison isn't entirely without basis and that makes me feel really awful and feels so degrading to think about it like that when ive thought of myself as so self assured about this stuff for so long

[babysizedfics]

oh my gosh i also wrap my stuffies in a little blanket when i have to put them away😭 as for the crocheted red cardigan... i'm thinking mumbo? even if he is not a caregiver... he still has a close relationship with grian and wanted to let him know he accepts and cares about him big or little, so he made a little cardigan for grian's bear. even though it didnt turn out quite like he imagined... grian still loves it and refuses to replace it with something more polished. the slipped stitches are what makes it Mumbo's Cardigan and he wont have it any other way. -cran berri

OH ur a right genius u are

you reminded me to say ive thought abt him as part of this series already! mumbo is definitely aware and supportive of grians regression! so this is so so sweet thank u cran berri!!!

i also love bc he is a very artistic person that he is the Bad Crocheter bc he dapples in a lot of different mediums - but it is very funny to think he either

A) has never been a natural fiber artist so isnt too great at crochet and just does it to relax very occasionally. or

B) he followed a quick tutorial/learned the basics from cleo simply bc he literally just wanted to crochet this one thing for lil grian bc he had a Vision and couldnt not make this for his baby friend 😭 i like B, i pick B. also the blankie grian wraps teddy in is prob made from the same red yarn bc mumbo wanted to use the rest of it up!

im rlly happy to get to include mumbo in a headcanon :') bc i did think about it but decided i wont be using him as a babysitter in this series

the watsonian reason for this is as much as he loves grian and doesnt judge him for this - he is just a bit stressed at the idea of taking care of him in such a vulnerable state and honestly might just be a tad uncomfy with the whole little stuff. doesnt mean he doesnt support it or is triggered by it or anything, ppl are just different and he feels iffy being a big part of it. also i find it funny to imagine characters being wholly awkward with children/littles and not knowin how to act or talk around them and this is lol so that too

that bein said grian prob has been half regressed w him a few times and mumbo hasnt minded much bc its so similar to bein with adult grian! and if grian has slipped into full regression mumbo probably has been pretty stunted and nervous laughter and weird energy and knows now to just quietly hold grians hand give him a reassuring smile and walk him to a cgs base so he doesnt have to be awkward for too long

the doylist reason is i have no idea how to write mumbo and dont want too many more characters lol but i rlly like the idea of silly lil interactions w supportive but awkward i-dont-know-how-to-talk-to-kids mumbo that grian probably teases him about when big

i hereby christen him Absent Uncle Mumbo

[rikeijo]

Hello! Not to start another drama, but I just wanted to reach out and say that your response(s) in this thread (https://rikeijo.tumblr.com/post/752089697475559425/like-ive-said-i-know-that-people-tend-to-see) was extremely BASED.

Our cultural ubringing affects how we view and interpret media a lot, obviously, and personally I don't see anything wrong with that. It's quite fascinating actually. However, I've noticed that a certain amount of people in Western fandoms (not just YoI) seem to behave that their view is the correct one, and those who don't share it doesn't know any better or is in denial, including authors/creators. Which is interesting (and very annoying) because it usually happens in fandoms of titles that are not made by OR for Western audience. Not that that they can't have their own interpretations/fanon/hcs, of course not. But I think that, in case of YoI, Japanese creator team as well as JP audience understand the canon material (and what it was meant to say) way better than non-Japanese.

Also, how we view things like sexuality, as well as other social topics/issues, is, again, greatly affected by our culture. For example, something may be considered 'gay' in one place (or during one period), and not in another. I may be wrong, but I think it works the same way with asexuality, i.e. one thing will be 'ace-coded' for a Westerner and, simultaneously, not for a Japanese person. Same thing with mental health issues, which seems to be a VERY important thing for Western fans. It baffled me as well. Like I'm reading through a fic and the whole cast is a psychward lol (sorry, jk). Meanwhile for fans from other countries, that's just character being themself, that's their actual personality. E.g. Yuuri may be an anxious person, but he doesn't have an anxiety disorder. That doesn't make those fans uneducated or regressive, it is simply their worldview and their interpretation of canon, that should be respected.

By the way, not really relevant, but personally I didn't think Viktor's 'why? You haven't won anything' comment (as well as the following), was that big of a deal. He was crass, yes, but ... Idk, wasn't Yuuri himself more shocked than offended by it? I just sometimes feel like EN fandom is being a bit dramatic about it. Plus Viktor is Russian, and Russians are know to have no filter, maybe they wanted to portray that, lol. I wonder what JP fandom thinks of that scene.

Lastly, I'll just say that even if certain people recognize themselves in a character, that doesn't necessarily mean anything. There are anorexics who recognize themselves in Howl. Doesn't mean Howl have an eating disorder though. It is, however, very fun to point out similarities.

p.s. sorry if everything above didn't make much sense

Hi! Thank you for your message! 💜

And don't worry, what you wrote makes a lot of sense, imo! I also don't think that it's drama, because it's just a general discussion.

Fandom is such a huge community and you can find the most open-minded, kind and caring people in the world there, but yup, on the other hand some people do have a little bit of this 'Western worldview, Western way of doing stuff is the *correct* one, and everyone else needs to make the effort to meet these standards' arrogance in them, if you ask me.

In case of YoI, I can only imagine (well, also you can read a little bit about it in interviews) how difficult it was for two female creators to get their way (they openly talked about the misogyny they faced, and how they needed Hiramatsu-san, a man, on the team as one of the main creators, to be taken seriously), because the topic (I mean the gay stuff) and their approach wasn't what the industry and fans are used to in mainstream anime, and sure, it's not perfect, and some people would disagree, but imo, they did a lot. Anyway, it's their creation, they were planning and worked on for years - of course they put a lot of themselves and their cultural background into this show. Just one, specific example of this is that Mitsurou is from Sasebo, Nagasaki Prefecture, Kyushu, and YoI, as many of her other works, is connected to Kyushu. One of the most traditionalist places in Jp, where male chauvinism is still doing pretty well. Isn't it kind of obvious that she's going to see Yuuri, a virile son of Kyushu, differently, compared to a teenager from the US?

Eg. on the topic of whether Yuuri has a mental disorder or not - the "canon answer" is no, because Sayo said so, as in: canon = what Sayo&Mitsurou created. Of course, it isn't difficult to understand why people interpret/want to interpret him as having a mental disorder, or why the comments about Yuuri's weight can make people uncomfortable, and my argument even in the slightest bit isn't that it's 'wrong' to interpret things in this way. On the other hand, this kind of mindset (that I personally felt was present a bit in that discussion you've mentioned) that the creators need to do better and educate themselves more and when they do, they will see that Yuuri is canonically ace or that the issue of Yuuri's weight loss was handled in a wrong way etcetc., because a fan felt this way, is just... to me, extreme arrogance. I'd say that people should rather just accept that their own experience is 'subjective', not 'universal', and they are in no position to give a moral judgement on whether the approach that two Japanese female creators took to a certain issue is universally right or wrong, not assume that sb, who thinks differently thinks so because they lack understanding or education. They did in the story what they wanted to do and that's their right as creators and yk, as human beings - to have their own worldview, opinions etc. that may or may not be different than yours or mine.

The funny thing is that we wouldn't probably even have this discussion if the creators were, for example, Ethiopian women or from Peru - but anime is mainstream in fandom spaces, so I don't think that many people care that much/think too deeply about identity of the creators and how it influences their work, as they aren't really perceived as 'minority' (from a western point of view), whose voice should be heard, because it's important and different, on the same level that many other creators (rightfully) are - to give an example, I think that if a Western fan tried to 'replace' a sexuality of a character in a novel written by eg. an Ethiopian woman with their own and argue that it's canon, this character canonically has this label now, bc they feel the character is just like them or whatever, it wouldn't be received in the same way - I think more people would argue that no, there is cultural background that needs to be taken into consideration, don't speak over the author etc.

[mcschnuggles]

Heyy previous anon raving abt akechi from earlier… in my defense u told me that i could talk abt him so… (lol)

My fav fic in golden verse has to be with goro and kawakami. Its pure comfort and i always reread it on a bad day and it never fails to make me feel warm and happy… i love seeing him cared for he rlly needs it :,) but i do wonder how that fic would look if it was written from his perspective rather then hers, and ig ive sort of made up a story in my mind abt it haha. Hes much less apprehensive then he is in other installments, probably partly bc HE called HER rather then being forced to drop after almost dying (😬) or being invited to a playdate, but it makes me wonder exactly what made him call her… knowing him it must’ve been quite something.

I also wonder if having her with him, a young woman in her 20s, reminded him of his mama who i always imagine to have been pretty young based on the circumstances. Idk i just think abt them, and even if we never get another installment of them together, i hope that maybe he has her when hes having a rlly rough time idk. Theyre just so so sweet and i think could heal each other maybe a little…. Ok just talking abt nothing but yknow!!! Love ur work!!!!!!!

YESSSS this is exactly what I wanted thank you!!!!!

oooh silver lining is slept on imo but that’s just because I love Kawakami so much it’s unreal. I really love getting to write her interactions, esp the unconventional ones!!

No no you’re spot on about his seeing bits of his mom in her it’s like you read my mind 😭 I just realized I accidentally posted the series order wrong but I do think he latched onto her during the indoor playground trip. Even if she was just going to sign for them, he had to do his research before he trusted his regressed self with anyone. Not to mention that I think akira would talk about her a lot beforehand and that would contribute a lot to this idea he has of her. I think when akira told the others they could always depend on Kawakami, it was more about the others if they needed help in school

but no you’re so right they could really have a chance to bond!! I imagine that after silver lining goro’s trust in her really blossomed so he’d be much more likely to call on her again. maybe not for something as drastic as blueberry getting torn, but maybe he’s had a hard day!! maybe shido popped back up in the news and it blindsided goro in public! I think that that relationship is still sour enough in his mind that it would be a roadblock, but Kawakami could be a nice foil to it. shido took care of him as a means to an end, so he’d have loyalty from the person he was using, whereas Kawakami just likes Littles and wants to see them taken care of. also I don’t think I’d ever do the strikers era with goldenverse BUT it would be so funny if the reason he couldn’t make it is because mamakami said no LAKSJDF

[malfromtheblue]

Ahhh, I'm so glad I asked!!

I'm not black, but I am chubbier (In more of a curvier sort of way), I have faint stretch marks, and I do love the fact that you aren't immediately ready to catch a case. So many yanderes are so ready to go way too far for their darlings, without taking their feelings into consideration.

Which leads me to more questions!

What would you do if your darling was feeling bratty and didn't want to listen to you?

How do you feel about age regression and how would you handle it?

What would be considered the "last straw" for you? Like, what would trigger you to snap on someone who's messing/flirting with your darling?

-🐼 (I am now your panda anon!!)

heya, my cute little panda!

you sound adorable, hon <3 i love squishy girls!

yes, i try to be rational for the simple reason that im not always right. i can be thinking that someone is flirting when they're just being nice. its harder to put that in perspective when you're in a relationship and it looks like someone is flirting with my darling, but i try to be of good judgement. and i always want to talk to my darling, and make sure shes actually uncomfortable before i do or say anything

now onto the question!

brattiness is something that can be tamed, so no worries. and really you dont have to "prove your dominance" by yelling or being rude. ive found that when a girl is acting bratty, she would rather you take a calm but firm and assertive approach. just in my experience. usually, i say something like "now when has this behavior ever gotten you anywhere?' or " im not going to listen to you if you cant drop your attitude for a second, Doll". the goal isnt to make her feel like shit, its to bring her back down to Earth and make her realize that bratting out isnt going to get her anywhere. but keep in mind that i love a girl who occasionally brats out, its the cutest thing 💞

im fully supportive of age regressors! as far as handling it goes, i would try to make my place as comfortable and safe for her. i actually have quite a few stuffed animals and fuzzy blankets. i mean, having an age regressor, i would probably have to upgrade a bit, but im always willing! and if anyone comes across this blog and is feeling small, you can always anon or ask and be as tiny as you'd like! i promise ill answer ya.

the last straw for me is if i can clearly tell that my Doll is uncomfortable with a person flirting and i can tell they can tell too but they keep doing it anyway. now thats an example of something that makes me lose my shit. like, how irrelevant and cheeky could you possibly be to be so disrespectful? even if theres a girl alone, you shouldn't continue making her uncomfortable. and its never any better if shes in a relationship??

did that help, my little Panda bear?

~ Mal💕

[gizkasparadise]

spoilers for ep 8 under the cut! mixed feelings on things atm

on the one hand, i am happy that tagon is more of a threat and they're not going the Mad King route because im so sick of that trope

on the other hand, it was stupid obvious that his OG crew weren't executed. idk how 2 of the consummate schemers of the series, especially the 2 that know tagon best (taealha, saya), didnt see this trick coming from 900 miles away

overall i dont think they know what to do with saya this season. he doesnt have as much screen time, feels pretty inconsistent, and they're (imo) downplaying his intelligence/ruthlessness as well as his spirituality quite a bit :/ i had hopes when he tricked the ago into thinking ipsaeng attacked him but him (& taealha) falling for this really obvious scheme aint it

adding onto that point, s1 pretty firmly established that saya is good at calculating but his big gaping weakness is how he craves validation, particularly from tagon and tanya (and this season even hints at that when he meets eunseom again!!). idk why they didn't do something more in that vein??? because saya throwing taealha under the bus in favor of an alliance with a finally-father-figure!tagon makes 100% more sense for subverting the coup (and i thought that's where they were going when tagon hugged him!!)

me @ ep 7: damn i think yangcha/tanya might be my season 2 ship, #conversion is the theme

me @ preview for ep 9: oh nevermind he's super fucked

all the actors are doing a great job! but i think the writing is fumbling it on some of them -- eunseom and saya in particular feel off to me. that said, i like how tanya & the wahans have been written this season (and prefer s2 tanya to s1 tanya, oops) -- ive seen people complaining about her dad but his character development (or rather regression?) feels right. the little reunion moments behind the scattered tribe members are also a really good touch, and i like that they did something with mungtae + dalsae despite the fast-track pace we gotta run to tie everything up

can we please streamline the ago plot. please. i beg you. im about to start fastforwarding on it

i think the nunbyul = sword theory might not be as dead in the water as i thought! she's featured a ton, and there's also something poetic about the three world-enders being saram, igutu, and neanthal. eunseom's sword is also not God Legit, and the fact that nunbyul is the only neanthal that can use a sword was referenced again

[auxfem]

ok heres the thing that's driving me a little insane: two of my siblings are firm believers of gender identity ideology and they are both in their mid to late twenties. as if that's not bad enough, my sister has recently said she's nonbinary. this was not a shock to hear because she has a couple things with the nonbinary flag on them that she hasn't bothered to hide; I figured it was only a matter of time before she said something about it. it really irks me though, as anyone on radblr can imagine. ive always been closer with this sister than our other sister, so for her to declare she's nonbinary, it feels like she's trying to erase the bond that we've had as sisters. especially considering how the two of us together contrast with the other women in our family. I'm a lesbian and she's bi; our other sister and our mom is straight, the two of us quit the religion we were raised in; our mom and our sister are still devoted members. it feels like I'm being shunted off into the side of the family that's not progressive. my mom and my oldest sister are the only ones in the family who are still part of the religion we were raised in (there's also my dad, but he is a PIECE OF WORK that I'm not getting into rn). us siblings who have left the church have had extensive discussions amongst ourselves about how fucked up the church is and how much we hate it and we complain quite a bit about our mother's involvement in it. we never really talk about how we feel about our other sister still being involved in it but we all know it's weird she's still part of it too. there's also the different dynamics in that she's our sister and our mother is, well, our mother. so we all know that they are willingly part of this organization that is regressive, and that's... honestly it's fine, our mother is and always will be how she is, and we know our sister has a good heart and tries to be a better kind of Christian. so for a while we had this dynamic of the women in my family: the two youngest daughters who realized for themselves that religion is not for them, in part because of who they can't help but be, and the mom and the oldest daughter who realized for themselves that they want to continue to be mormons, and we know this about each other, and we still love each other. it was equal, two and two. plus another two: my brothers. so if my sister is nonbinary, what does that make it?now the majority of the women are the unprogressive cultists, and on the non-women side, there's the progressives. oh whoops, there's also me, the ONE woman who isn't part of the misogynistic, homophobic, psychologically abusive religious cult. i also suspect that my "nonbinary" sister and older brother are suspicious that I hold "TERFy" beliefs, so can you see how it feels like I'm going to be shunted into the "not progressive/Bad Woman" section of the family? especially since my mom and oldest sister are just going along with how they've been raised and what they've known their whole lives, whereas I should know better because I got out, I see the other side, I know how awful it was is being oppressed as a woman and a lesbian. so then what will they think of me if I tell my sister what I really think of her being "nonbinary" if they believe in the TERF boogeyman?

[toerrishumansodontbeone]

.

Everywhere else seems too shameful to share(though I did anyway) & elaborate on, because those places are full of legitimate knowledgeable pros/artists, but uhhhh,

so I think I want to become a tattoo artist?

But seeing as I am the person that I am, living in the place that I am, knowing the language as badly as I do and having the anxiety that I do that makes it appear even more basic, I don't think I really can go the traditional route of studio apprenticeships.

And the loud majority of studio tattooers will of course tell you to never ever how even dare you try to do ANY tattooing on your own!!!! To the point of actively discouraging even buying a machine at all, even just for practice skins. Just draw a lot and go spend 1-3 years in an unpaid grueling apprenticeship where maybe they'll let u do something in a year or so uwu (tho there are also ppl fighting the gatekeeping) ( n some apprentices Ive seen whove started doing serious practice within a few months)

But yea so,,, thats why tbh it feels embarrassing to even mention me wanting to, even though on the other hand thats also.... the way to put any sort of attention on you, to garner interest from prospective mentors and amass future clients....... but also god its nerve wrecking thinking some local pro is looking at my stuff with disdain and mockery.

It just sucks how much language is a barrier for me. I'm not confident enough to just barge in talking in english even if they prob know the language fine enough.

Ontop of that its kinda sad I had all this sustained motivation for several days in a row but then I made the mistake of posting some little designs online. Because I was excited about it I of course expected excitement back. A response! A showering of praise and acceptance!

But the need for social validation is a poisonous pit and it never gives back quite what you give it. I knew it would not give me the validation and would ruin things and make me doubt myself and still I was hopeful and wanted it to be different and maybe a little bit more like the old times,,,

Its so hard to keep up my own confidence, as essential as it is to human psychology. I cant even create those little wins to sustain any real growth in myself. I just keep regressing and becoming worse. Im a hermit but one that doesnt even have any real community to turn to even online..........ughhhhhhh.

This is a very unstructured ramble, but its felt so fruitless having all these thoughts clogging my brain and nobody to talk to about them.

I dont know. Now I suddenly got back into writing and making more significant progress on my story/possibly novella.

and inbetween I thought more and more of how tattoo artist is the antithesis of me. I cannot pull my own clients, I cannot talk to people and make them want to keep coming back for my company, I could not do the receptionist duties for an apprenticeship, I do not even have an appropriate space to tattoo if it ever came to that AND renting even v small offices is stupid expensive at first glance. So I could not start doing that without already having a steady stream of clients.

Tattooing feels like a level of responsibility I could handle, it feels like it would be an interesting new craft to explore, w techniques to master, a different kind of self expression........ but thats all idyllic theory. No career path really fits me and it comes back down again to me being so unable to change my social ineptitude. Its such a waste how I had some modicum of comfort and progress in that sphere my last few years in Latvia,, and it fell apart just because it was so unsustainable financially......... N now that Ive been comfortably settled for a while in austria, just being financially stable and comfortable isnt enough...

Insanely Ive been wondering if the economy has evened out some in LV that I could come back.......but theres no way I would even physically *survive* through some unpaid apprenticeship there.....