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Poly 141 x Reader
Home is where you are
"What ye think she made this time?"
Johnny mumbles, dropping his head back against the seat behind him. Blinking tiredly up at the ceiling of the truck, a daydream clear in his eyes. Simon next to him stares out the window, sweat seems to practically seal his balaclava to his face.
"We'd be lucky if anything. It's three in the fucking morning.."
Kyle says from the passenger seat. Pursing his lips a bit.
"She should be sleeping.."
Price chuckles from the driver's seat, hand on the steering wheel, paying close attention to the road.
"She knows we're on our way home. If she made something. We'll be thankful."
His other hand is resting on Kyle's knee, his thumb rubs slow circles against him.
Simons foot taps on the floor of the car silently, brows tight together. The man just wants to go home, shower, eat whatever heaven you cooked and sink into that california king mattress. With all of you, all five of you together.
"Steaks."
He mutters.
"Hm?"
Johnny questions with a hum, Simon clarifies.
"On days we come home.. it's either steak or shepherds pie. She made shepherds pie last time so it's gonna be steak."
They all salivate at the damn thought.
"It's tha little things with ye huh Simon?"
Johnny smiles warmly, leaning on his shoulder.
It was another thirty minutes driving before they finally pulled into the secluded driveway. Their safehouse. Their home. Where you are. Filing out of the truck, bags over their shoulders. Covered in grime and dried blood, they didn't even let themselves clean up at base before going home to you. Walking forward, Simon slings an arm around Kyle's shoulder. Tucking the sargeant into his side as they walk to the house. Both Johns walking behind them, Price giving the younger a good slap on the back.
"Home, boys. Let's enjoy it while we can."
Price comes forward to unlock the front door, pushing it open for the four of them. Mumbling out a reminder to take off their shoes inside. Leaning down with a grunt to pull off his boots. The others doing the same. They can already smell what you're cooking, Simon was right. The smell of steaks is pretty clear, garlic butter, some kind of steamed vegetables and spices.
The house is clean. Warm. Low lighting, some candles lit. Everything about it screams home. John opens his mouth to call out for you, but he can feel his spine practically melt hearing you hum in the kitchen.
Johnny is the first stumbling forward, hopping on one leg as he throws off his remaining shoe. Eager to get back to you. Grinning as he comes around the corner into the kitchen. He melts. Seeing you there, in your chair dishing up their plates of dinner.
".. Hey lass.."
He mumbles, feeling like all the air left his chest.
You turn your head when you hear him, the brightest smile spreads across your face. Tossing the fork down from your hand as you turn towards him.
"Hey soldier-"
You beam. You don't even get another word in before Johnny rushes towards you, you let out a puff of air as he crashes into you. Laughing against him as he squeezes you to his chest, his face buried in your hair.
"Fuckin' missed ye hen.."
He whispers. You return with one of your own.
"I know baby.. I missed you too.."
You lift your head, kissing the scar on his chin.
"This bloke botherin' you love?"
You already know that voice immediately, smiling as you turn to look at Kyle. Who is quick at your side with Johnny, his hand cups the back of your head. Pressing a long kiss to your cheek. Taking a deep inhale of your scent through his nose. You smile warmly, your hand finds his bicep, giving a soft squeeze.
"There you are Kyle.."
You murmur, turning your head to press your own kisses across the bridge of his nose.
"Always here."
He chirps, kissing on your skin. His eyes bore into you, drinking you up. Johnny huffs, mumbling something about stealing all your attention. Earning a small tug on his mowhawk from you.
"Alright you two- showers. The both of you. You need it-"
You chuckle, giving them both a hug. Giving Johnny one more kiss on the jaw. Letting Gaz get one more kiss on your face. Watching them head past you down the hall to the bathroom. Kissing on eachother, bumping into walls. You shake your head at them with a smile.
Eyes flicking back to the entrance. You find Simon staring at you, his shoulders slack and sinking. Eyes half lidded and tired. The rest of his face under the balaclava. Your eyes soften, holding out your hand to him.
"Oh Si.."
He takes the invitation. Coming over to you. He would tower over you in height. But instead he falls to one knee in front of your chair. Hands resting on the arm rests of your chair. Your hands immediately cradle his head. Leaning forward to press your head to his.
"You're home.. it's alright now .. no more Lieutenant.."
You whisper against him. Your fingertips lift the edge of the balaclava, pulling it over the nape of his neck. Over the back of his head, nails dragging soothingly up his scalp as you take the fabric away. Making him shiver in vulnerability. Putting his mask aside on the counter.
Seeing your Simons face eases the both of you, cupping his jaw and lifting his head.
"I know doll.. I know."
He mutters, you kiss his temple. Caressing his skin. Threading your fingers into his hair.
"Go shower with the boys sweetheart.. I'll be in there soon."
You coo at him. He chuckles deeply, kissing your head between your brows as he gets up. Bumping your foreheads together one more time before walking to the bathroom.
"You're not gonna say hello to me John?"
You joke, turning your head to watch said Captain. Who was holding his hat in hand, leaning against the wall watching you. He's been watching you the whole time.
"Just seein' you with our boys darlin'.."
Pushing away from the wall he walks over to you. His eyes full of exhaustion, longing, warmth. Tossing his hat on the counter behind you. He leans down, callous hands hold your cheeks. Bringing your lips to his.
He's not as sneaky as he thinks. You know of his little demand to the boys. He's the first to kiss you. Each time they come home.
You kiss him back feverishly, as much as you've been calm and steady for them. You missed your men like hell. Your hands find his shoulders, squeezing them tightly, beginning to work on the knots of tension in them. Emitting a deep groan from John into your mouth. You smile against his lips, feeling the scratch off his beard.
"Everyone's alright?"
You whisper against him. He nods, his hands finding your hips. Slightly lifting you from your chair and towards himself.
"No one's broken. .. Kyle's a little stressed. Y'know how he is.."
You nod, eyes still closed, continuing to brush your lips together.
"And you?"
"Just tired.. But I'm home. That's what matters."
John mumbles, kissing you deep again. Dipping his tongue past your lips, a soft sigh slipping out of you. Arms pulling him closer.
"Taking good care of our boys John.. You always do.. Making sure you all come home to me again... Our strong Captain.."
You can feel him sinking at your praise. The older mans knees want to buckle at your voice.
"Let's get you in the shower baby.. Hm? Get you washed and relaxed.."
You mumble against him.
You yelp as your lifted into the air by his arms, laughing openly as he carries you like a bride. Burying his nose to the crook of your neck. Carrying you down the hall, to the bathroom door. Where you can already hear the chatter of the men in the shower waiting for the two of you. John is grumbling against your skin.
"We need you darlin'. "
"Our boys and I need you bad.."
#disabled reader#cod x reader#call of duty x reader#cod mw x reader#johnny mactavish x reader#simon riley x reader#kyle garrick x reader#john price x reader#poly 141 x reader#taskforce 141 x reader#simon ghost x reader#johnny soap mctavish x reader#kyle gaz x reader#captain john price x reader
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Silly TNG stuff
#the name game#tng au#fae au#fae sun#fae moon#witch reader#disabled reader#fnaf#fnaf au#dca#dca au#daycare attendant#dca fandom#fnaf sun#dca sun#fnaf moon#dca moon#sun x reader#sun x y/n#moon x reader#moon x y/n#dca x reader#dca x y/n#art#my art#digital art
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now my head's splitting at the seams
✴︎ in the labyrinth of my pain, would you find me?
✴︎ Azriel x Valkyrie reader, platonic Cassian x reader
✴︎ Summary: you miss a few days of training, down with a bad migraine. It turns out Cassian has a few misconceptions about your condition and, possibly, about pain itself.
✴︎ Warnings: mentions of nausea and vomiting (no descriptions), pain, toxic positivity and ableism, internalized ableism, Cassian's a jerk in the first half. Also I'm so sorry for the tense changing back and forth 💀 I would definitely not call this one a masterpiece
✴︎ Word Count: 3.4k
AO3 Link / Writing Masterlist
✴︎ Notes: somehow writing out my feelings about having a migraine turned into something pretentious about pain and ableism. I think a lot about John Green's "pain is the opposite of language" and how much that's changed my perception of pain
Also listen I love Cassian and I have no problems with him but I had to pick someone to take my feelings out on I'm sorry 💛 also just want to acknowledge that everyone experiences migraines differently and it's not a topic I'm an expert on so I'm sorry if you don't feel well represented by this.
Tbh I could write several essays about the way pain and disability are handled in the acotar books but that's for another time.
Letting out a frustrated groan, you squeeze your eyes shut tighter and twist your knuckle into the pressure point at the base of your palm, chasing the momentary relief it'll give you from your nausea. It works for a minute, and you're considering making your way to the bathroom before another wave hits you when your bedroom door flies open.
"You're late," Cassian's voice bellows through the room and he doesn't see you wince. He strides into the room, footsteps booming across the floorboards, and he's left the door open behind him, letting a traitorous amount of light into your dark room. What good were black out curtains if your darkness was going to be invaded like this anyways?
"Oh my gods you've got to talk quieter," You curl tighter around yourself, head clutched in your hands.
"So you're hungover?" He stops near your bed, arms crossed as he towers over you.
"No, I have a migraine."
"Isn't that the same thing?"
You squint up at him, scowling, swallowing every bad word threatening to spill off your tongue. Though maybe he deserves it for coming into your room without asking.
"Please leave," You say quietly, all the venom you could usually imbue into your voice completely swallowed by your current condition.
"You've missed three days of training." He says by way of answering, definitely not following your request to lower his volume. "You can't coddle yourself like this."
His words punch the air from your lungs. Coddle? Something terrible is rising in your gut, along with the desperate thought that you can't deal with this right now.
"I'm not - this isn't - I don't think you understand how much it hurts." You scramble for words, cheeks heated from pain and anger.
"You've gotta push through it," He says, no hint of sympathy.
"Cassian please."
"I'm not leaving until you agree to come with me."
You don't have time to respond before you're running to the bathroom and throwing up whatever you'd managed to keep down last night, head throbbing with every movement.
Breathing hard, you lean back from the toilet and clutch your head in your hands. The silence rings in your ears and you aren't sure if Cassian is still there or if he finally took mercy on you and left, until his voice makes it's way to you, with just a hint of remorse in it -
"I'd better see you up there."
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
Cassian did not see you at training that morning, and you're assuming you've bruised his ego because the next day he doubles down.
The thing is, Rhysand knew of your condition. The other priestesses knew. It's only Cassian being out of the loop and if he understood what a migraine felt like, you're certain he wouldn't be dragging you up there. You were used to dealing with people who didn't understand, had worked hard to learn how to give yourself kindness no matter what other people said. But it's like he knew exactly what things to say, what buttons to press to undo all of that progress.
It was like he'd pulled off your armor, piece by piece, leaving you cold and exposed. Going back to that world where weakness was your given name and it hurt worse than stepping into the ring and fighting the pain. If you could prove him wrong, just make it through a couple of hours, you could return to your sanctuary of darkness. And at least then, you wouldn't hate yourself on top of everything else.
So you followed him up to the training ring, struggling to open your eyes all the way in the morning light, hunched over to make the pain down your shoulders and neck just a bit more bearable. You sway on your feet, but Cassian either doesn't notice or doesn't care.
When he moves aside, revealing your small, huddled frame trailing beside him, Gwyn gasps.
"Cassian!" She cries, her tone scathing, and the hint of smug triumph slips from his face. It disappears completely as Gwyn rushes to your side, folding you into her arms to block your eyes from the light. You groan into her shoulder and go limp in her arms, grateful for the support.
Azriel stands to the side, watching with narrowed eyes. His arms are crossed over his chest like Cassian's, but there is no determination or judgment in his posture or expression. There's angry, crackling flames as he watches the redheaded Valkyrie thread her fingers through your hair and murmur soft comfort.
"She missed training all this week," Cassian says, but he's not barking any more. He's feeling a little bit small underneath the glares that pin him where he stands.
"Yeah, we know," Gwyn says, and it's the closest she's gotten to snapping at him in the whole time they've known each other. She turns to you and her eyes soften. "Let's get you back to bed, love."
"No," You murmur, guilt and shame bringing your resolve to the surface once more. You gently push her away to stand on your own, raising your squinted eyes to meet Cassian's. "I can do it. I'll be fine."
She watches you take shaky steps to the nearest mat and begin stretching, body obviously stiff from a few days in bed. You're conscious of all the eyes on you, far too sympathetic for your liking. This is exactly what you hated.
"Are we starting or not?" You let out a stiff laugh, too aware that your words are lightly slurred. That is absolutely not helping the hangover accusations.
The other priestesses shuffle to get into place, bumping into each other as they move to find their positions. There was still a horrible silence, crackling with fierce anger, all rippling in Cassian's direction. He halfheartedly called a few orders, visibly uncomfortable with the energy in the ring.
And you tried. You tried hard. To move your body through the stretches like normal. But your muscles protested every move, threatening to lock back up, sending stabs of pain through your skull. It didn't take long for the nausea to take over, forcing you to the edge of the ring, doubled over and dry heaving.
"This is ridiculous," Gwyn scoffs before she's at your side again. "You're going to back to bed."
"I will not be weak," You growl at her, panting as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, "I am not lazy."
Gwyn's head snaps around to find Cassian, mouth dropped open in fury as she silently dares him to confirm that he may have suggested weakness to you.
"You're not and you know it," She says softly, hauling you up and leading you away from the training ring. “Don't do that to yourself.”
Cassian is feeling like he's surrounded by wolves, all the glares that are being sent his way. He understands by now that he's messed up, and in front of a group that may not be easily inclined to forgive him. He's sure every single one of them has experienced the disbelief that he foolishly shoved your way. For their pain, or for anything else.
He thought you would snap back to your normal self after a bit of warming up, shake off your symptoms with a bit of movement and sunshine. You were strong enough to, if you wanted to. He'd seen it before. He thought you just didn't want to.
A small, firm hand lands on his arm and he finds himself looking down at Nesta. There's sympathy in her expression, but her eyes twinkle with the threat of a nasty bite if he dares to say anything stupid.
"She gets them after particularly bad flashbacks," Nesta says, "Or sometimes they're just random. Madja says there's no fix for the pain but darkness and sleep."
Cassian's stomach twists so terribly he thinks he might puke, too. In the midst of attempting to instill resilience, he's understanding that he knows nothing of this kind of pain. This is something different, something that cannot be conquered in the same way as emotional pain, as every day aches and injuries. You are a soldier in a battle he has no strategy for.
He may understand the concept of emotional resilience, of getting back up and into the training ring when you don't want to. But this is different.
The final blow, the thing that makes him want to cower and hide, is meeting his brother's eyes. Seeing the fire there transports him back in time, sending flashes of a smaller Azriel pushing himself too hard, determined to show the world that he'd never be less because of the damage to his hands. Fighting against words far too similar to the ones his own brother had spouted to you this morning, desperate to become strong enough that no one would ever doubt his pain and live.
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
It was not a surprise that Cassian found himself in Rhysand's office later, confessing how thoroughly he'd fucked up, desperate for a little direction in how to fix this mess.
"It has to be their choice," Rhysand is saying, eyes meeting Cassian's over his glass.
Cassian's mouth opens and closes as he tries to conjure a response. He knows that. Of course he knows that. But apparently, his brain had not wrapped around how far that concept might go.
Cassian let out a grunt as he sat back in his chair, arms crossed. Rhysand knew he didn't have to push any further, he recognized the conflict in his brother's eyes. So he sat with him, quiet, while he processed.
"Do you want to know what it feels like?" He broke the since after a while, as the idea came to him.
"What?" Cassian blinked, startled from his thoughts.
"A migraine," Rhys explained, "Do you want to know what it feels like?"
Cassian frowned, studying his brother's expression for anything resembling amusement, but there was none. So he nods.
Not even a full second later, his skull is attacked with throbbing pain, deep in the base of his neck. He hadn't even noticed the fae lights before, but now they overwhelm him, causing a dull pain to surface behind his eyes. Nausea curled up his throat, threatening ruthlessly.
"Oh gods," He leaned forward and clutched his head in his hands, finding that his limbs trembled under his own weight.
"Do you push yourself when you feel like this?" Rhysand asked softly, not taunting. Prompting.
"I don't really ever feel like this," Cassian grumbled out.
"Hm," Rhysand mused, his brows drawing together. He'd experienced episodes like these often, under the mountain. He knew that Azriel struggled with them through his teenage years, like his brain still struggled to process his senses outside of a dark cell.
Deep in thought, he only remembered to ease up on Cassian's mind when his brother whimpered.
"Some say pain cannot truly be described with language," Rhys says, gaze somewhere else as Cassian gulps down air. "And that your pain is one of the few things that is truly yours, that you can never share. Even if you manage to describe it, it will never be felt by anyone else."
"I thought she was just hungover," Cassian says, but he's not defending himself. Rhysand knows.
"What if she was, though?" He tilts his head to the side, watching his brother carefully.
And that is the thing that had begun to unfurl within Cassian as he stood surrounded by the priestesses he'd wronged. He understood that having true control of your body meant that dictating how pain is handled had to be yours, too. He understood that pushing someone to deal with pain in his own way was a violation in and of itself. He had stepped into the world that you had carefully balanced and re-built around your condition and dared to tell you that you may have done it wrong.
"Will she get better?" He asks, thinking of the agony he'd just experienced for a few short minutes. The same one that you'd been experiencing for three days, now.
"It's hard to say," Rhysand shrugs, "Madja says she will likely experience these off and on for the rest of her life, but she may have some periods of remission."
He tilts his head at his brother again, "You know that a majority of the priestesses have an invisible disability of similar kinds, right? They won't get better. They will be in pain every day until they die."
Rhysand sighs, thinking of the hundreds - possibly thousands - of tins of salve that Azriel has gone through, numbing the pain of his nerve damage. Trembling hands hidden in black gloves, tucked into his body and away from the world. And that is the reason he's bothering telling Cassian of any of this. Otherwise, he might let him figure it out on his own.
"But the healers-" Cassian begins.
"Are there to help them cope with their emotional pain and trauma," Rhysand nods, "But some of them, a lot of them, were disabled as a result of what they went through and will never get better. Like Clotho.”
Oh.
It clicks in Cassian's mind, then. Who else Rhys meant. Who else Cassian had insulted. He had never barged into Azriel's room, insisting that he still train even when he could not flex his fingers without wincing, without trembling too hard to hold a glass of water. But he'd done it to you, in front of him. And that pinned his disbelief on Azriel all the same.
Azriel's pain, your pain, were enemies that neither of you could defeat. And here he was, shoving a sword into your hands, and insisting that you try.
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
A soft knock sounds against your door, so quiet you almost don't hear it. You stare at it, wondering if you should pretend that you didn't. But then the knob turns slowly and it opens just a crack, and a soft voice is saying into the darkness,
"Hey, it's Azriel. Can I come in?"
Your breath catches in your throat, and you watch his shadows dancing back and forth through the thin wedge of light he's letting in.
"Sure," You say, moving quickly to smooth your rumpled clothes and tangled hair before he steps in. You're not exactly sure what he thinks of you after this morning.
He steps inside and closes the door behind him. His eyes seem to glow in the darkness, an amber-honey color, and somehow you can still see his shadows, like they're even darker than your room with no light.
"I just wanted to check on you," He says, crouching down beside your bed so you don't have to sit up.
"I'm okay," You say, still getting over the surprise of the Shadowsinger in your space. It's true, though, you suppose. You're used to all of your other symptoms by now, and your heart hurts worse than your head.
"He's an idiot sometimes," Azriel says, basically spits. A smile begins to spread on your face so he continues, “Like, sometimes he's just an asshole, straight up. But this time, believe it or not, I think he actually meant well and was just an idiot.”
“I know,” You give him a sad smile and all of the anger melts from his face.
“I think he went to buy flowers if that makes you feel any better,” He sighs. You know he's just as mad at Cassian as you are, maybe even more mad. But he still can't help vouching for him. It's definitely going to take more than flowers to forgive him, but it's a good start. You also appreciate that Azriel has bothered to warn you ahead of time, in case you wanted to avoid Cassian's apology.
“How are you feeling?” He asks, so quietly. And you wonder who else has earned this tenderness from him.
“It's not too bad right now,” you say truthfully, though you know that sitting up or going outside might be pushing your luck.
“Still hurts?”
“Yeah. Still hurts.”
He nods. “I can try something that helps me, sometimes.”
You search his eyes for a moment, then nod.
“Can I touch your face?” He asks, almost a whisper.
Your heart leaps into your throat and you fight to keep your face neutral as you nod again, no idea what he's planning to do with you.
Slowly, leaving enough time for you to stop him, he reaches out. He's not wearing gloves, like usual, and in the dark you can just barely make out the uneven silhouette of his dimpled, scarred hands.
His fingers land gently on your forehead, and he presses his thumb between your brows. Gently at first, and then harder, circling a tender point under your skin. It makes the pain in your head sharper, and you let out a hiss.
“I know,” He says, “Bear with me a minute.”
You close your eyes, biting back a whimper, but after a moment the pain begins to ease. He keeps going for a few minutes and you feel your whole body relax, pain free for the first time in days.
You don't realize how much you've leaned into his touch until he gently pulls away and you find your head falling forward with him.
“What is that?” You open your eyes and blink at him.
“A pressure point,” He grins, and it almost looks like he's blushing.
“That's magical,” you say. You hesitate for a moment, and then, “you can sit on the bed if you want.”
Azriel smiles and straightens, and you move your pillow to the side to make space for him. He slides off his boots and sits on the bed next to you, legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles. You place your pillow next to his lap and settle back into it.
“Thank you,” You say, your body feeling lighter than it has in days.
“Of course,” he says.
A silence settles, but it's not uncomfortable. There's something in it that you understand. He's just keeping you company. Here to sit with you in your pain.
It's easy to relax in his presence, between his calm aura and the pain relief he's offered you. And you find yourself spilling the question that's been circling though your mind since this morning.
“What if I can't fight, someday? What if I can't be a Valkyrie anymore?”
Azriel stills beside you. It's a long moment before he says anything. You're tense beside him, and it makes you flinch when he brings his hand so gently to rest on your head. Not moving, just resting.
“First,” He says, in the same soft voice, “You'll always be a Valkyrie. Because you cut the ribbon. Because you sisters will never let you go. And because I know for a fact that the Valkyries did not strip their warriors of their title if they became disabled by an illness or an injury.”
“Really?” You breathe.
“Mhm,” He hums in affirmation. You forget sometimes that he knows the Valkyries from more than history books.
“And second,” His voice drops lower, like he's sharing a secret with you. His hand moves, fingers slipping gingerly through your hair. And it makes you realize that he came here with his hands uncovered as an offer of solidarity. Combing his scarred fingers through your hair, he is offering you vulnerability, like recompense for what you bared this morning. A trade. A truce.
“If you cannot fight,” He continues, “Then you will show the world that a formidable woman can be made from more than fighting skills. You will still be - will always be - something incredible.”
Tears prickle at your eyes, form a lump in your throat. You reach up to grasp his hand, the only thank you that you can manage in the moment, and he lets you.
There's another silence, as he holds your hand in the dark.
“Who helps you?” You ask, turning to look up at him. He watches your eyebrows knit together, so serious, and he swallows a smile.
“What do you mean?” He says.
You bring one finger up to tap the space between his own eyebrows.
“With your pain? Who helps you like you helped me?”
“Um,” He shrugs, “Sometimes Rhys if he has time. Otherwise, no one.”
That's what you thought, but it still makes your heart twist in your chest. It takes a deep breath before you have the courage to say the next words out loud.
“You should tell me next time you're in pain. And I'll help.”
Azriel stares back at you, something bewildered in his eyes. Because he sees your suggestion for what it is. The same thing he offered you. A trade. A truce.
A beginning.
“Yes,” He whispers into the dark, and his hand closes around yours. “I will.”
#relieving someone else's pain is strangely intimate???#idk what this is honestly#acotar#acotar fic#acotar fanfic#acotar fanfiction#acotar x reader#azriel x reader#cassian x reader#platonic cassian x reader#Rhysand#Azriel#cassian#madja acotar#Gwyneth berdara#nesta archeron#disabled reader#chronic pain#hurt/comfort
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I Just (Don't) Need Help (Part 1/2)
Yandere Batfam x Disabled Female Reader
Warnings- disabled reader, manipulation, reader is in pain, very light yandere themes
Notes- The disability isn’t named because I wanted to make it as inclusive as possible, although it is heavily based on my experiences because I only really know what I’ve experienced. The reader and Damien are both high school seniors, cause I said so. Reader lives alone because who needs parents?
It was the pain. That God awful pain that made you unable to eat, or sleep, or think. Everything in your body screaming at you to quit and give up, but also begging for help. In the end, however, there was nothing you could do.
You've tried, God did you try. You tried to work through it. You've tried to get help, but person after person, and doctor after doctor ignored your pain, ignored your symptoms and left you stranded in this unbearable hell.
You just wanted peace. You just wanted to live without this unending pain. You found it confusing how a human can constantly go through so much pain and not die from it.
You were behind in school. You've lost another job. You were so goddamn tired.
You pulled the phone off your in-stand. Sending a quick text to your friend Damien. You ask him if there were any important notes you missed at school and if he felt like sending you a picture of them. You let him know you’re fine, just sick, and hoping that’ll calm the quantity of texts he has sent you.
You have to be careful with him, Damien, he's easily irritated and highly intelligent. You’ve told him about your disabilities, but you try to not let the pain show. You know he knows something, because he'll press you for information on yourself and stare you down when you refuse to do certain things. He knows it’s worse than you let on, but he doesn’t press like the others.
The text was only slightly changed from one you sent a few weeks ago. You didn’t have the energy to write a whole new text so you copied an old one, only changing it so Damien didn’t catch on and think the flare up was too bad.
Despite only taking a minute or so, it already took all the energy you had left in you. Throwing your phone to the side, you tried to get comfortable, and you drift right back to a restless sleep.
~
A loud pounding woke you from your queasy rest. You wondered if you could slip back into that sweet dark nothingness, but with the noise being made you knew it’d be useless.
You’d gathered all the bearings you could, and a blanket for good measure, and made your way to your front door. Before you even got there, however, it was already opening. You stood there deadpanned as Jason looks up at you from his bent position; clearly finishing picking your lock.
Dick smiles at you with an awkward laugh and greets you. “Heya… sorry for the intrusion, princess.” He chuckles nervously again. “Damien said you skipped school and stopped answering his texts and everyone got pretty worried soo, here we are!”
“Yeah, okay.” You say with a sigh and go sit on your couch.
Jason and Dick share a concerned look at your exhausted form. Frowns perching on Jason's face, and a worried smile on Dicks.
“Sooo,” Jason started. “You feelin alright there, doll? Ya look pretty… bad?” He awkwardly asks you.
He and Dick sit on the couch with you while Dick quietly scolds him about telling you, you look bad. If it was for the lightness in your head you’d laugh a little at the brotherly behavior, but for now you opt to lay your head on Jason's shoulder once he’s settled on the seat.
“t’s jus a flare up…” You whisper out to them.
You really didn’t want to have a whole conversation. The urge to down all of the pain medicine in your cabinet comes back up. The need to just get the pain to go away. No, you didn’t want to die, but you wanted the pain to stop. You wanted to be able to appreciate your friends coming over to check on you. With all the overwhelming symptoms you couldn’t appreciate much.
With your eyes closed and head on Jason's shoulders, you had missed another look Jason and Dick shared. A mixture of annoyance, concern, and dark thoughts showing clearly through their eyes.
“Didn’t you go to a doctor for that?” Dick asks you with an irritated tone.
“Said he doesn believe me…” You tell him. “Think I wan drugs or somethin.”
Jason scoffs loudly at this. “You’re a drug seeker now huh?”
“‘Mm parently.” You reply.
Dick moves closer and rubs his hand lovingly across your back. You humm with appreciation at the action. Your exhausted form relaxes a bit more into the soft cushion. You move your head and hide it a bit more into Jason's chest.
“Maybe,” Dick starts softly. “You should come stay with us for a while?”
You sigh in frustration. “Already told you guys ‘m not gonna use you like that.” You state angrily. “You’re my friens not a resource for me ta use.”
“I know, I know!” Dick defends, throwing his hands up in defense and laughing nervously. “It’s just, we’ve got tons of money and can get you an actually good doctor. Y’know one that’ll actually listen to your needs, birdie.” He explains passionately.
“Besides,” Jason chimes in. “You’re like family, hunny. We want to help you out. And Alfred has been dyin to see ya again.”
“I don’t wan to…” You tell them.
Jason scoffs. “Why not?”
This situation was too much for you right now. The pain you felt weighed you down and made it harder to hold yourself together. The little bit of poise you had was bubbling off you like melted flesh leaving you at the barest version of yourself, and that self was angry and confused.
You didn’t get why every time you got sick or had a flare up they got like this. Urging you to come live with them ‘cause “it’s easier” and “they can help” or because “you a kid” and “you shouldn’t be living alone”. What do they know? They were adopted by a billionaire and have a huge family. They don’t know what it’s like to feel the way you do. Of course some things they understand, but a lot of it seems they don’t.
It was irritating for them as well. They want to help you, but you always refuse. It always ends in an argument and you push them away for a while until you forget why you were mad in the first place. It was a tiring loop that everyone was becoming sick of.
You lean forward and out of both the mens touches. “I don‘t know why!” You sluggishly shout. “I jus don’t wan to. I don’t know why it’s always a fight with you guys… Jst let me rest please! I’m in pain ‘n all you wanna do is try and hold a conversation that we all know will only end in irritation.” You breathlessly tell them.
You stand on unsteady feet and start walking back towards your room. The stiffness and anger making you feel even worse.
Why can’t they try and see things the way you do?
Of course, they were wondering the same thing. Dick stands up to follow after you. Matching glares enter the brothers eyes as they mirror your steps. Determined to not give up this time when you clearly need them.
You’ve already buried yourself in the bed by the time the two come to your doorway. Honestly you were a bit surprised when they came to sit on the edge of your bed. Well, at least Jason did. Dick crawled over and layed propped against your headboard next to you.
“Okay… Maybe we’ve been a little too pushy.” Dick says.
“Maybe?” You ask glaring up from your covers.
He laughs at you. “Okay, okay, I get it! We’ve pushed too far… It’s just- it’s just that we can get you the help you need, and it’s not like you’d be staying forever. Just long enough for you to get a proper diagnosis and medicine or whatever to make things easier.”
The change from joyful to melancholy in Dicks voice had you feeling guilty. The way he poured out his heart into people never ceased to awe you. You shift to sit up more against the headrest. Jason’s hand found its way to your calf where it rested casually.
“You know we don’t want to force you to do anything. We’re just so concerned for you. We know you’ve been alone for so long, but you don’t have to be anymore.” Dick says love shining in his eyes. “I know you think needing help makes you weak, but it doesn’t, and what’s family for but to be there for you when you are. Can’t tell you how many times we’ve been completely consumed by worry for you.” His brows furrowed as he explains.
“Just long enough for you to get to feelin better. That’s all we ask, doll.” Jason adds on.
“Jus a little while? That’s all?” You ask hesitantly.
“Just for a little while, princess.” Dick answers.
You nod slowly and whisper an “ok”. The two men were immediately in motion packing you a bag. You sat up more and assured them you could do it yourself but they hushed you in excitement. Jason asked you if there were any specific things you wanted while Dick filled a bag with clothes.
All in all time moved swiftly as the two moved like practiced dancers. Within minutes dresses and sentimental items were pulled from their proper places placed into bags and moved out of your home. Dick picked you up despite your demands to walk and brought you to their car. The two of you were followed closely by Jason who carried the last bag of items you’d be taking with you to their homes. Claims to come back for more were made by all three of you as you left the rest behind.
It didn’t take much for you to fall asleep in the back of the car. The rumbling and pain induced heaviness lulled you to sleep like a baby in a cradle. Because of your peaceful rest your arrival at the manor was kept relatively calm so as to not wake you. Bruce coming out to carry you to your new room while the other two grabbed your items. Tim checks the camera placed in the bedroom to make sure it’s operating and Alfred prepares a simple snack for you to eat once you wake up.
#batfamily#yandere batfam#platonic batfam#platonic yandere batfam#batfamily x reader#jason todd x reader#dick grayson x reader#damien wayne x reader#tim drake x reader#batman x reader#disabled reader
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diversity december masterlist
logan howlett x reader
the idea of diversity december is to write fanfics for people like me who don't often see themselves represented. these don't necessarily need to be holiday related fics, or even winter related.
if any other writers want to participate i would absolutely adore that. even just one fanfic means a lot when you never see things written with you in mind.
🤍 fluff, 🖤 angst, 🩷 smut, 🩶 dark
the librarian (latina reader) (🤍): after the events of logan (2017), in a world where logan survives, he and laura move to a small town to start a new life. laura quickly becomes very attached to the librarian, and seeing you with his daughter makes logan fall hard.
autistic reader (🤍): a drabble about logan dealing with reader who gets overstimulated. also slightly a logan character study.
curvy reader (🩷🤍): logan is obsessed with your thighs. this was supposed to be shameless smut and somehow turned out soft and loving.
black reader (🤍): you're a single mom to a shy daughter. when your daughter makes a new friend, laura, you start to spend more time with her father, and naturally, you fall for his gruff demeanour and kind heart.
afro-latina reader (🤍): when you start working as a professor at the x-mansion, you give logan a reason to stay and spend more time there. friends to lovers.
genderfluid reader (🤍): you love decorating, you do it for every season and holiday. this time, logan joins you in the festivities. (no religion is specified for the reader, it is not mentioned whether they celebrate christmas or not)
bisexual reader (🖤🤍): the worst wolverine comes from a universe very different from this one. a universe where things aren't as great for queer people. so naturally, he panics when you ask him if he has a crush on his roommate.
autistic reader (🤍): there are days where eating is a struggle, where nothing tastes right and it becomes overwhelming to deal with. logan refuses to let you go to bed without food, so trial and error it is.
disabled reader (🤍🖤): dealing with chronic pain is hard, especially as an x-men. but logan is always there to take care of you when you have a bad pain day.
desi reader (🤍🩷): trying to teach logan how to cook ends with you on the table, his head between your legs.
latina reader (🤍): annoyed at the way laura always makes comments in spanish when she doesn't want him to understand, logan comes to you, asking you to teach him his daughter's native language.
jewish reader (🤍): with all the christmas celebrations in the x-mansion, you decide to take it upon yourself to plan hanukkah festivities for the jewish children at the mansion.
main taglist: @raeinyourdreams @meetmypointlessaddiction @chubbyhedgehog @yxtkiwiyxt @isepod @dis-plus-fanfic-reblog-writes @deaky-with-a-c
latina reader: @naggywaggy @mami-veracruz @spencerswh0r3 @taextannie @gl1ndathegoodwitch @uncertified-doc
autistic reader: @thegothempress @z0m3r-blud @yourlocalmerchgirl
curvy reader: @spencerswh0r3 @seasonofthenerd @thegothempress @yourlocalmerchgirl
bisexual reader: @spencerswh0r3
desi reader: @seasonofthenerd
comment on this post to be added to the taglist or if you only want to be tagged in a specific fic, that's fine too.
#series: diversity december#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett fanfiction#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine fanfiction#latina reader#logan howlett x latina reader#autistic reader#logan howlett x autistic reader#curvy reader#plus size reader#logan howlett x curvy reader#logan howlett x plus size reader#black reader#logan howlett x black reader#bisexual reader#queer reader#logan howlett x bisexual reader#logan howlett x queer reader#disabled reader#logan howlett x disabled reader#desi reader#logan howlett x desi reader#jewish reader#logan howlett x jewish reader#old man logan howlett
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Hii! I just wanted to ask, if youre up to it, how jacce would react to a darling who is disabled and sometimes ends up bedbound for a day or two at a time because of it? Would it be cuddles central? Would he wait on them? What might he cook?
If thats not your speed maybe just something cute about his favorite type of outfits on darling ^-^
I’m totally up to it! 😆
If Jacce had a disabled darling that occasionally ended up bed bound, he would definitely be at their beck and call. The only thing he would be missing is a nurse uniform at this rate (any kind you want to imagine 👀). Plus he would never think of them as a burden, quite the contrary since Jacce considers being of any help to his lover to be a great honor. If his darling condition doesn’t hurt them too much, he would for sure be the first to volunteer for cuddles and give them massages! He would also try to cook comforting food for his lover, either their favorite meal or typical things like homemade chicken broth. Anything to bring a smile to their face basically!
・*:.。..。.:*・*:.。..。.:*・
As you tried to drift off to sleep, since you really didn’t have anything else to do, you could hear faint whimpers coming from your side. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think a stray had broken into your room. But as you opened your eyes and glanced down you could see Jacce, with his chin resting on the side of the bed, looking up at you with worried eyes. You let out a sigh before speaking up.
“Jacce I told you I’m going to be fine.” You raised your hand to run your fingers through his hair, “I’m used to this.”
It didn’t seem to calm him in the slightest.
“Still… I hate seeing you hurting and not being able to do anything about it.” He mumbled into the sheets and you could even suspect a pout.
You smiled at his response. Jacce’s eagerness to help you in any way shape or form when you weren’t at your best was always a part of him that you found incredibly touching, even if it sometimes came off as a bit clingy.
“Since you’re here, why don’t you slip into the covers and cuddle with me? I was about to fall asleep anyway.”
And it only took that to light up his face in that familiar puppy-like expression.
#answered#answered asks#my art#yandere#yandere x gn reader#yandere male#yandere oc#tw yandere#sub!yandere#sub yandere#gn reader#x gn reader#yandere x reader#yandere x darling#My oc-Jacce#dom reader#pathetic yandere#male yandere#desperate yandere#yandere x you#disabled reader
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Doctor's Visit | Implied Harvey [Stardew Valley x Reader]
Word Count: 847 Warnings: Mentions of fainting, no name used Pairing: Harvey x Disabled!Reader implied
A/N: Written in 2nd Person because I am cringe but I am free. This is not proof read at all.
Three, two, one. The way that you blacked out wasn’t too unexpected, it started happening a lot since you started to live in Pelican Town. It did come unexpectedly this time, well not really, but at this point you would like to pretend that you only passed out when you were up too late on the farm, or out in the mines, but you knew that wasn’t true.
Waking up on a hospital bed was something you had became familiar with, but not something that you had let yourself grow accustomed to. The hum was the first thing you let yourself tune into, having been out a lot longer than you were used to since they had time to move you.
“Harvey,” You called out, your eyes landing on the doctor, who was only a few feet away, reorganizing a few things.
“You’re awake,” He said, his voice cheery as he turned to look over at you, but his eyes held a deep bout of worry. You didn’t let yourself think too much into the look in his eyes as he walked to be by your side as you sat up. “Easy does it,” He said, moving his hand to give you a small bit of help to sit up.
“I’m alright,” You assured him, your voice gentle as you took his hand to help you sit up all the way, letting your feet dangle over the side of the exam table you woke up on. You didn’t say anything about how you having been asleep up there was dangerous, there were only so many resources that this small town clinic could have.
Harvey’s brow furrowed as he looked at you, his arms crossing for just a second. His mouth opened and shut a few times, like he was planning how to speak, what to say to you as you sat there, looking at him expectantly.
“You passed out in the town square,” He said after a moment. Like this was somehow going to convince you that you weren’t okay.
You couldn’t help the laugh that pushed past your lips, your head shaking gently. You knew he was telling the truth, you were there when it happened. The look of confusion that shot over Harvey’s face made you take a deep breath, clearing the laugh from your throat before speaking.
“I’m alright, I just,” You paused, thinking of how to say it. Your last job didn’t have the best health benefits, and then this one the only clinic was ran by the doctor before you. “I’m disabled.”
That was how you decided to say it, it made it a lot easier than to explain all of that.
“In your files-” Harvey started, but you promptly cut him off.
“I was unable to get a proper diagnosis before moving here,” You explained, trying not to let yourself get red in the face. You always had this small habit of second guessing yourself, why you couldn’t get a diagnosis, even when symptoms were right there.
Harvey stayed quiet, taking a moment to process before moving to pick up a clipboard, jotting a few notes on there, you watched him, confused by the man’s actions.
“What are you..” You asked, a small pause as you tried to move to see if you could read the clipboard. “Doing?” The final word came out of your lips as he set the clipboard back on the counter.
“Making a note,” He said, walking over to you, pressing the back of his hand to your head, just to make sure everything seemed fine without making it too professional feeling.
You just nodded, you didn’t seem too bothered by it, you were used to that, the notes, the comments, the “What if you’re making it up?,” all the “What if it’s just in your heads?” So in your mind, Harvey was doing the same thing.
“I can recommend you to an out of town doctor, to see if they can help you,” He said, his eyes locked on yours. “Also, I do believe you need to take it easy with the physical strain you’re putting on your body until its figured out.”
You let those words settle in, the care in his voice, the way that he was taking you seriously, you couldn’t help the large smile that came over your lips.
“I will, thank you, Harvey,” You said, you did move to hop off the examination bed. “This means a lot.”
To you this meant the world, the urge to hug the man was strong but you were fighting it off. It wouldn’t be too odd since how close knit the town was, how close you’d grown with him over the year.
“Of course, I care about you,” He said, his hand reaching to gently set on your shoulder, so you used this as a chance to push forwards to give him a hug.
You then stepped back, both of you a bit red in the face before you said your goodbyes and headed out, back to your farm, a grin on your face.
#rosie.writes#stardew valley#stardew valley x reader#stardew#stardew x reader#sdv harvey x reader#stardew harvey x reader#stardew valley harvey x reader#x reader#reader insert#fanfic#disabled reader#harvey x farmer#harvey x reader#sdv harvey#sdv farmer#stardew valley fanfic#stardew fanfic#sdv fanfic#sdv x reader#sdv x farmer
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... Familiarity ...
[Reader reminiscing about the way Kurt smells and the familiarity it brings them. Sprinklings of my own headcannon’s about how his signature BAMFs don’t just smell like brimstone and why they're so unique to him]
The scent was familiar; ash, ozone, and brimstone. Not entirely pleasant, but not horrendous either. It was something familiar, something comforting. Everyone said that Kurt smelled like brimstone, but you couldn’t agree, not entirely at least. Ash, ozone, and brimstone. It was the scent of the smoke left behind by his ‘BAMF’, the smell of when he donned the suit and became ‘Nightcrawler the X-Man’, but it wasn’t him.
Kurt reminded you of a lot of things; laughter and safety and half-translated jokes in a language you couldn’t understand but loved to hear. He didn’t smell like brimstone, not entirely at least, and the thought made you pause. He smelled like bread, and clean laundry, and for some reason heat. It was a combination almost as interesting as the smoke of his teleports, and one just as comforting. You never realize how... calming, the scent of the person you love could be until it’s not around anymore. The scent of brimstone clung to his fur, sure, but he was meticulous about his hygiene and spent most of his time out of the suit. So, most of your days with each other smelled like Kurt; like bread, and laundry, and heat. It was soothing, and for all that you teased him about smelling like rotten eggs after his BAMFs, you still clung to him without hesitation, still relaxed with your chest against his as he laid back on one of the many couches in the Institute. “Why do you always smell like bread?” You look up at him, a confused expression pinching his eyebrows together as he tilts his head at your words. The question had been itching in your brain for a while, rolling around your skull like a particularly stubborn marble. The scent of bread, and laundry, and heat filled your nose as the fur of his neck tickles your cheek. “I can’t really figure it out. I know you eat a lot of bread, but I don’t think that would make you smell like it too. I just... don’t get it.” You could feel the tip of his tail flicking in amusement against your ankles as a small smile graced his lips, a flash of fangs peaking out and catching your attention as he chuckles softly before you go looking back up at him. “It... might be easier if I just show you.” His hands press a little firmer into you, the one at your back holding you steady while the one on your upper arm rubs the thumb thoughtlessly as he shift the both of you to sit up, his legs moving out from under you to plant his feet quietly on the floor. You follow suit, adjusting yourself and moving to grab your crutches, slipping the braces onto your biceps. Kurt stands first, smoothing out his shirt while you get your crutches on and holding out a hand to help you up, always a gentleman.
You take his hand to pull yourself up before you steady yourself with your crutches, your grip on the handles loose and easy and familiar, the material comfortable under your palms. His hand moves to rest on your shoulder as he guides you, walking towards the kitchen. You stare at him curiously, but don’t question him, although his amused grin is quite nice to look at. The walk is quiet, save for the soft hums that reverberate from Kurt’s throat, following along to some silent melody only he can hear.
He leads you into the kitchen, and then towards one of the stand-alone freezers, opening it up and assaulting your nose with the scent of bread. You blink the cool air from your eyes and stare. What... what were you looking at? You glance at Kurt only to see him holding the door open with one hand while the other sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, his tail coiling nervously around his leg. Wrapped up in cling-wrap and lining the shelves of the small upright freezer, were rows upon rows of bread. There were different shapes, and sizes, and colors, all neatly ordered and wrapped up tight. There was even a small pile of what looked like pretzels. You were very, very confused. A quick glance at Kurt made him chuckle and avert his gaze sheepishly, a feat for someone without visible pupils. “I... miss the bread back home sometimes. I took to baking it myself sometime after I first arrived at the manor to help with the homesickness.” He pulls out one of the pretzels and fiddles with it in his hands, slowly closing the freezer door. “The professor aided me in finding the recipes, I usually bake a few different types at once and then store them for later. Sonnenblumenbrot is my favorite, which is why there’s so much.” This was not what you were expecting. “I-, huh...” You blink a few times, just to get your brain back in order. A small huff of amusement escapes you at the absurdity of what you’re seeing before a small chuckle breaks out. You lean a bit more firmly on your crutches as you let go of one of the grips, lifting a hand to muffle your giggles. You look up at warm yellow eyes and give a baffled grin. “I’ll be honest, I didn’t take you for the baking type.” Kurt let’s out a small chuckle of his own as the tension melts from his shoulders. “Well, I don’t like to bring attention to it. Besides, baking is Kitty’s thing. I really only make bread Spatzl.” You point to the pretzel still in his hand with an amused grin and another chuckle. “And pretzels apparently.” Kurt’s ears flush indigo, although it was a bit hard to see under the fur. Your own grin ticks up at the corner in amusement. “Can I try?” And with the scent of bread and laundry and heat in your lungs, a new note of familiarity threaded itself into your heart as Kurt grinned wide, threw the pretzel in the oven, and you fell a little bit more in love.
#kurt wagner x reader#kurt wagner/reader#nightcrawler x reader#nightcrawler/reader#x men x reader#x men x you#kurt wagner#nightcrawler#crutch user reader#reader uses elbow crutches#disabled reader#it's a pretty minor part of the story but I still wanna shout it out#KweenyWrites#kweenyfic
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Hiiiiii I just read your new loki fic with a disabled little and I was amazing to read especially when it's relatable like that I have a bad relationship with my health 😅
If your comfortable with it I really feel that a stucky x disabled little would be a perfect match cuz bucky is disabled (just in a cooler way with the vibranium arm) and iv been reading how you write bucky and Steve and they just want what's best for they're little so I need to read them helping the reader be more comfortable with they're disability.
You can ignore this but I just wanna say I love your blog and I hope your having a great day
-🦄
Hurts.
Masterlist - All my work!
A/N - hiii! I am so sorry your request took a little bit because I wanted to make it similar yet different to my story "It's hard." because everyone's experience with pain and why they don't feel comfortable with others when in pain, or for why they have bad relationship with their health is completely different. I wish I could include everyone in each post, and if you'd like to share your story with me I'd love to know, your never alone in your battles. If you have any feed back please let me know!
Warnings⚠️: mentions of rough family life, parents saying meds should fix the pain, ignorance of how pain affects someone, negative regression, mentions of bucky in hydra but nothing significant, please let me know if I missed anything!!
Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes x Little!Reader
___________
Bucky understood what it was like to be in unbearable pain, feeling like your entire body was being ripped to shreds. He had been stuck being experimented on for how long? When he told Steve about how he felt on a daily basis even after not being experimented on for a while, Steve did his best to learn how to help him out when the pain just made it unbearable.
This meant that steve tried hard to figure out the best ways to help anyone who was in severe amounts of pain. He tried epsom salts, different type of ointments, mental care, anything he possibly could think about to make bucky comfortable.
So when they met you, you didn’t seem out of the ordinary for them, to them you were seen as such sweet person and you were pretty confident. When people would talk to you, you helped them out if you could, or were polite in saying you couldn’t.
You had originally met the two in a library when Steve and Bucky were looking for different types of books to try and learn more about the world today. You were trying to reach for the book on the highest shelf, and pain was shooting through every fiber in your body. You were exhausted and uncomfortable when you saw Steve's shadow behind you and got spooked. You jumped and nearly fell over from moving too quickly off your tippy toes. He gently grabbed your arm to stabilize you before smiling at you and apologizing for scaring you.
He asked if you needed help with getting the book off the shelf and you quietly said yes. It was one of your favorite childhood books, you read them sometimes when you regress, although he didn’t need to know that. You felt bad making him do it for you, even though he asked. You know it wasn’t anything significant but you had never been able to accept help.
Your family barely paid any attention to your pain, you were thrown on meds that did nothing when you were a kid and they stopped caring. Everytime you said something you always got “Well, did you take your meds?” “Your meds worked yesterday, don’t lie to me” Meds this, meds that. It got to the point you stopped taking meds and never asked your parents for help with your pain.
When you were able to finally get into doctor offices by yourself you got meds that helped somewhat, but you still never felt as if you could rely on anyone else to help with your aches and how you felt on the inside. You had meds which meant that you should be fine and learn to deal with the pain on your own. Right?
You had seen the duo in the bookstore quite often after the first interaction, learning they were together and they were shocked when you told them you had no clue who “captain America” or the “winter soldier” was. You never really payed attention to the world outside of your bubble, you couldn’t relate to a lot of people so you shut off a lot of the outside.
Eventually they asked you out, and from then on is history. But something you still hadn’t told them about was the chronic pain, and the regression that came from it. You had times where getting out of bed was the worst idea ever, showering was beyond out of the question, and regression was the only option your brain had.
You’d regress young enough that you could toddle and make it from point A to point B, but past that you had no survival when you were in so much agony. This means there became times you didn’t eat for hours, you’d sleep longer than you should, and there would be times you didnt respond for hours to anyone.
Bucky and Steve got super worried on days you never replied, they tried to let you have your space, thinking that it was something that you just did, but when you didnt show up for a date at their place, they ran over, thoughts racing.
They knocked on your door which woke you up, but you had no energy to attempt in getting up. Not knowing it was them, you assumed it was a package and tried to go back to sleep when they knocked louder.
Steve continued to knock while bucky prayed that you had left a key outside to your apartment incase you lost yours. He looked under a brick and practically ran to get your door open. Thank god that he remembered people put keys under rocks.
When they got in the apartment, the quickly rushed to find you. Scanning and worridly running around.
“Y/N??” Steve shouts, checking the bathroom.
“Sweetheart?!” Bucky yells as he opens the door to your room, where he finds you crumpled in pain, your room darker than a cave.
“Please, stop screaming.” You mumble quietly, you clutch your stuffie to your chest, your regression starting to set in after being brutally awaken.
Bucky quickly comes and sits by your side, helping to pull the blanket away from your face, looking at you with complete and utter concern.
Steve eventually comes in with some things in his hands, bucky looks at him puzzled before connecting the dots.
See, Bucky found you, but Steve found your regression and safe room. Where you had soft toys and padding everywhere. It was something you had filled with everything that you could need for when your regressed, and when it hurt too much to move.
The two knew what age-regressors were from tony, seeing as him and Stephen were the proud caregivers of Peter and Wanda. So when Steve saw your pacifier and heating pads, and anything else that might help, he grabbed it all.
“Baby, can you tell us whats wrong?” Bucky softly asks, tucking your hair behind your ear, Softly rubbing your thigh with his thumb.
“Hurts.” you mumble out softly, you slowly flip over, and bury your face into bucky's stomach. His scent fills your lungs, and he slowly starts to rub your back, holding you closely.
Steve comes up behind Bucky, his face contorted to a face of his own pain. He hated seeing you so upset, and mowing you were trying to fend for yourself, by yourself, hurt him.
“Do you want your pacifier darling?” Steve gently asks, he wasn’t sure if you knew he had found your room, and wasn’t wanting to freak you out.
Hearing him ask that question, you looked up from bucks embrace with pure terror. How did he find it? Why was he so calm about it?
Bucky softly cupped your cheek and kissed your forehead before pulling you back into his embrace, rubbing small circles on your back before he speaks calmingly.
“Doll, we know about regression or age-dreaming, there's nothing to be afraid of, we promise.”
You relax into his hold before slowly nodding. Steve hands you your paci and you slide it between your lips and just rest against bucky, the pain minorly subsiding with the extra pressure of his hug.
“Baby, I know that the pain can be hard to handle, but you don't have to go this alone, you'll never be alone now that we're here. Whatever we can do, we want to do it. Please never feel as if you have to fight this battle alone.” Bucky manages to barely whisper out, fighting his own emotions.
Your tears begin to fall, hearing words you've never heard before. You’ve had to fight by yourself for so long, that maybe them knowing wasn't for the worst.
“Your not alone anymore, never alone. We're with you now. The pain doesn't have to be suffering anymore, let us help.” Steve sits next to you and buck, rubbing your back and leaving little kisses on your head.
You slowly nod, wanting someone to be there, maybe this time, you'll be able to accept the help. The right help.
#agere#agere little#little!reader#agere caregiver#cg!steve rogers#sfw littlespace#agere fanfics#age regression blog#cg!bucky#steve rogers#disabled reader#Stucky x disabled reader#stucky#stucky x little!disabled reader#little!reader x cg!stucky#cg!stucky x little!reader#disabled reader x Stucky#Bucky barnes#steve rogers x bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x steve rogers#steve rogers x bucky barnes#steve x bucky#bucky barnes#bucky x you#bucky x reader#Steve rogers x bucky barnes x y/n#y/n#stucky x y/n#stucky x reader
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Hello, sorry in advance - my English is VERY bad😭💔
have problems with blood pressure, which often makes me dizzy, and yesterday in the bathroom because of the pressure I lost consciousness and fell - my mother was very scared, and we waited another half hour for an ambulance🤣
(everything is fine, I got tangled in the bath curtain and it saved me my head from a concussion, but I sprained my neck, hit my nose and got bruises all over my body)
I would like to know how the bayverse tmnt(individually) reacted to the fact that there was a crash from the bathtub, the door was locked, and when they managed to open the door, their beloved was lying on the floor, her feet on the edge of the bathtub, and the girl herself was lying unconscious, confused in the bathroom curtain on the tile floor? 🤣
Will they scold the girl for her habit of locking doors, or will they wash her themselves after this event, idk
(please guys take care of yourselves especially if you have the same health issues as me 🙏)
Bayverse Turtles x Fainting Disorder Reader
Listen with me! ↠ⁿᵉˣᵗ ˢᵒⁿᵍ ↺ ʳᵉᵖᵉᵃᵗ ⊜ ᵖᵃᵘˢᵉ
A/N: Behold! The singular ask that survived the Tumblr askbox purge. It's ok dear! It took me a bit to decipher the ask but I think I've got the jist of it!
Leonardo x Reader 🧡
Heart attack the first time you fainted. Warn a guy if you have a fainting disorder will ya?
Internally screamed while carrying you to Donnie to see if you need the hospital. Deep breath of relief to find out, no you don't.
Please tell him what you have and how to help. He's just one big ole softy and he loves you and wants to make sure you're safe and comfortable.
Scolds you every time you lock doors. He understands your wish for independence and privacy but either you leave the door unlocked or he breaks down the door. Your choice.
Can be a bit overbearing at times so don't be surprised if you need to have a talk with him at some point. Let him know you appreciate his effort but it's just a tad suffocating.
Probably knows your medical history like the back of his hand. Wants to know everything to be helpful so you've probably told him something about something at some point and now he has it all memorized.
Call him while at the doctor's office if you forget. He'll think it's amusing that you forgot your own medical history but will still happily tell you what you forgot. He enjoys feeling useful.
Constant stash of water and snacks in his room and kitchen specifically for you. If anybody else touches it, they are required "by law" to replace it or else they get ha'shi treatment.
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿
Raphael x Reader 🧡
Literal panic attack the first time you faint around him. Screaming for Donnie and asking if you're gonna die.
Don't be surprised if he yells at you for not telling him. He's not trying to be mean, you just scared him is all. Just let him get it out and eventually he'll calm down and apologize for yelling before holding you in his arms.
This man ain't gonna remember shit about what ever the fuck you have. He'll remember the name and that it's a fainting disorder and that's probably it.
This man already has a water bottle stash but he happily lets you access it whenever you need to. Hydration is good!
Not afraid to break your door if you lock it. What if you faint face first into some liquid and then drown and die? Hm?! He loves you too much. You're not allowed to die. Leave the damn door unlocked.
Another turtle you might have to sit down with and have a "I appreciate your effort but you're suffocating me" talk with.
Probably has a note on his notes app labeled "Tiny's Medical Shit" with some basic information on your disorder and how to help with dizzy and fainting spells.
His room looks like it's absolutely baby proofed with the caps he puts on sharp corners and with all the pillows and blankets on his floor but really he's just doing his best to keep you safe and injury free.
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿
Donatello x Reader 🧡
Worried the first time you faint around him but not all panicky like Leo or Raph. He might softly scold you for not telling him about your fainting disorder though.
Faint proofs his lab. He wants his baby in his lab with him but that wasn't exactly possible for awhile so he had to faint proof his while fucking lab. Please praise him for it, he desperately needs the validation.
As soon as he knows you have a fainting disorder, he looks up what it is and suddenly knows more about it than even you do. POTS, narcolepsy, it doesn't matter. He knows more than you now.
Will love you for eternity if you call him while at a doctor's because you forgot something about your own medical history or just don't know the answer.
"Hey Donnie?" "Yes dove?" "How many times would you say I've fainted in the past month?" "Twenty-seven. I have it all documented. Why? You at the doctor?" "Yeah. Figured if anybody knew the answer to that question, it would be you." "Well you were correct. I love you, dove." "I love you too, my love. See you tonight."
He doesn't care if you lock doors. This man knows how to pick a lock in twenty different ways. He also knows that, if push comes to shove, he can easily just break the damn door down.
Lots of water and snackies for you in his lab. Nobody tries to steal from your stash. Mikey tried once and had to deal with scary Don for few solid minutes. They know better now, lest they incur the wrath of Scary Dontron.
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿
Michaelangelo x Reader 🧡
Surprisingly chill the first time you faint around him??? Like why the fuck is he so calm???
He does his best to study up on your disorder but, much like Raph, he knows what it's called and that's about it.
Has a "fainting spot" for you in his room that's essentially just a nook in his room with extra fluffy blankets and pillows with a basket of water and snacks within reach. Whenever you faint, he places you there and stays close by until you're awake and conscious.
Doesn't worry too much about locked doors. He'd prefer if you don't but he understands that he can easily bust the door down if needed.
If you're clingy after a fainting spell, this man is gonna eat it up. Need him to hold you? Course baby, come here. Need some kisses? Who is he to deny you? Need some head rubs while you bury yourself into his arms? Why it would be criminal to deny you!
He isn't the best at keeping up with all the fun facts about your disorder but he's surprisingly fantastic about tracking your fainting spells. Like, it's Donnie level tracking. He may not know the ins and outs of your disorder like Don would but he can indeed tell you that you've fainted three times this week.
Will chirp if you call him at the doctors. He can't promise he'll know the answer to your question but the fact that you thought of him and called him still warms his heart. Prepare for him to cuddle and scent you when you get home if you do this.
I'm so sorry for not writing guys. I've been in Ao3's embrace for the past few days. 🤭😂
#tmnt fanfiction#bayverse tmnt#tmnt bayverse#bayverse tmnt x reader#bayverse leonardo#bayverse leo#bayverse leonardo x reader#bayverse leo x reader#bayverse raphael#bayverse raph#bayverse raphael x reader#bayverse raph x reader#bayverse donatello#bayverse donnie#bayverse donatello x reader#bayverse donnie x reader#bayverse michaelangelo#bayverse mikey#bayverse michelangelo x reader#bayverse mikey x reader#disabled reader
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König x Disabled!Reader Head Canons
For the physically disabled lovelies 💗
Part 2
Completely gender neutral. All fluff🩷
Not all physical disabilities covered, if interested I can make a part 2.
At first König treats you like a delicate little flower
Slowly understanding that he needs to stand back and wait for you to ask for help
He goes out of his way to learn about your disability and ways to support you
If you have gastric issues
He will prep meals you can eat and buys snacks that are safe for you
Makes you home made broths instead of the box or cans
Only the best for his Schatz
In his free time, he sits down and organizes your pills for you so you don’t have to worry
Organizes your braces to be easily accessible for you
Sees a cool cane on Etsy, buys it for you
König drives you to every doctor appointment, no matter how minor
He will go in and sit with you
König is your biggest advocator
He will speak up for you when you feel you can’t
Makes sure you get the best care
THAT YOU DESERVE
Keeps an extra asthma inhaler with him at all times
If your condition requires physical therapy
He learns what stretches or exercises your PT requires for you
Always encourages you and tells you how well you’re doing
"mein Schatz, you put the soldiers I train to shame." *head kisses*
(Even though all you did were 2 sets of donkey kicks and some clams)
Chronic pain?
He learns pain maintenance at home
Königs large strong hands gently massaging sore points of your body
Win-win for him because he loves to see you better and loves to touch you
“Don’t push yourself Schatz, what can I do for you?”
Always has extra pain patches, cream, and even CBD gummies on hand for you
“Heat or ice?”
Bed is covered in pillows for any support you’ll need
Stairs your biggest enemy?
König can carry you
And your wheelchair/walker/rollator
All the uppies
Does routine maintenance on your wheelchair for you
You sit there worried you aren’t good enough for König
All the while
König sits there wondering how he got so lucky to deserve you
#konig#konig x y/n#konig cod#konig x reader#könig#könig x reader#konig headcanons#könig mw2#könig headcanons#disabled reader#könig x disabled y/n#könig fluff#konig fluff
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Your blog is like a buffet, thank you 🥺 I would like to maybe put in a wee little request of poly 141 with a reader that has arthritis with pain flare ups maybe, I'm kinda going through it rn with a bad flare
{Thank you for your lovely words and great request! I'm sorry about your flare, I hope it goes down soon!♥️ Take care of yourself pookie♥️ paraffin wax has helped some friends of mine :)}
John notices your flare first. The way you try to breathe through your pain and continue your tasks, eyes close and shudder for a second. His eyes soften and a frown etches on his face. Oh sweet thing, you've done enough. He just wants you to rest. He'll move closer to your side, a hand sliding warmly up your back before holding the nape of your neck. Authoritative, yet in a gentle manner.
"Darlin'?.. you doin' alright?"
He asks, he knows you're not. But whether you tell him you are or not gives him an inside to exactly how much pain you're in.
However no matter how you answer, he's sending you to go rest. Kissing your temple.
"Hm? How about you watch a movie with our boys? I'll take care of dinner.."
His arms wind around your waist, pulling your back into his chest. Kissing on your shoulder. He didn't want you to feel bad for needing a break. Besides the boys waiting on the couch would be more than willing to look after you.
"John you really don't have to worry about it-"
You can hear the creak in his knees as he bends to lift you up. An arm under your knees, and another behind your back. Kissing your cheek, his beard tickling your soft skin.
"We're home now. We can take care of you."
He mumbles. Glancing over as Kyle walks into the kitchen. Tilting his head at the scene.
"Something happen?"
He asks in a bit of alarm, raising his brows. John shakes his head coming over to stand in front of the younger man, holding you up between them. Mindlessly you reach up, skimming your fingers over Kyle's jaw. Who takes your hand gently and kisses your fingertips.
"I'm alright really-"
John sighs at your dismissal. Leaning to kiss Kyle's head just above the brow, explaining to him.
"Flare up.. darlin' will be up in no time. Just needs some rest and care is all."
Kyle hums in acknowledgement, taking you into his own arms. You groan at their dramatics, dolling you around like you can't move at all. But smile as Kyle peppers your cheek in kisses.
"Let's get you to the couch lovie.. I'm sure Johnny will be all too eager to give ya a massage while I get you an ice pack yeah?"
You sigh softly, leaning into his chest as he carries you into the living room. Despite your groaning earlier, it was nice to simply rest. Get the weight off your aching and stiff joints.
"Thank you sweetheart.."
You mumble into him, a smile spreading on his lips.
"Just loving you sweets, nothing any of us wouldn't wanna do."
Coming into the living room around to the couch, Simon sits up stiffly seeing you carried like that. Nearly throwing Johnny off on accident, earning a yelp from the scottsman. Seeing that look of pain threw the blonde man off.
"She alright?"
The question Simon asks makes Johnny blink and sit up as well. Kyle waves them off, slotting you carefully between the two men.
"Flare up."
Is the only words he needs to say. Before both Johnny and Simon envelop you in their arms.
"They're being dramatic- I'm not dying y'know-"
You giggle. Simon chuckles, an arm around Johnny's hips as you lay between them on his chest. Johnny laying almost on you, quite the effective soldier sandwich. Johnny kisses your collarbone. Leaning into the dramatics to cheer you up.
"Our wee lass. How are we ever gettin' by without you?"
He practically purrs. His hands warmly brush over you, serious for a couple seconds.
"Where does it hurt bonnie..?"
As you tell him, he caresses, massages, and feels over each area that you mention to him. Watching you with loving bright eyes. Occasionally leaning down to notch your lips together, swallowing up your groans of comfort. Simon licks his lips watching the both of you, gripping Johnny's mowhawk to pull him back a bit. Kissing him first, sloppy and rough.
You watch the two of them. Pressing a kiss to Johnny's throat from below him, your fingertips skim over Simons arm. When Si disconnects the kiss he leans down to kiss you next, gentle and soft. Moving slow and sweet with you. Now Johnny is watching with a lovestruck grin. Hands still kneading and massaging your aching joints.
Doesn't take long before Kyle walks back in with a couple of ice packs, kissing Simons cheek- which has the blonde pulling back. Just so Kyle can get the next kiss, cheekily pressing his tongue in to run over your mouth. You laugh and pull back when he's had his fun.
"Got your ice baby."
He hums, Simon takes the packs, resting them where Johnny is done massaging.
"Twenty minutes on and off!"
You can all hear John say sternly from the kitchen. Kyle smirks and nudges your shoulder.
"I'll go help the old man with dinner."
He says. You reach out before he can leave, bringing him into some drowning kisses from all three of you on the couch. Kyle finally slips away after a couple minutes of chasing eachothers mouths. Wiping his lips with a dazed smile as he heads back to the kitchen.
Johnny's cheek is on your chest now, cradling the back of his head close to you. Simon is kneading at your hips. Whispering into your hair.
".. We'll get you in a hot bath.. yeah doll? Warm you up.."
His Manchester accent purring in your ear.
"You won't have to move an inch. You take care of everything while we're deployed. Gotta do the same for our girl.."
#cod x reader#disabled reader#call of duty x reader#cod mw x reader#johnny mactavish x reader#simon riley x reader#john price x reader#kyle garrick x reader#poly 141 x reader#taskforce 141 x reader#141 x reader#kero answers
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I'm gonna start a trend hehe >:3
So :
How would your Fae Sun and Moon react to being called baby (as in affectionate petname sense)? Like when we pet them or we just nuzzle into their necks gently??? Sth sth soft touches and petnames have been plaguing me lately, thank you 😃💥
OKAY SEE YOU JESTIE HEHEHE
🫣💞✨💥‼️
Calling the faeries, the generous pet name givers themselves, a pet name?
Oh, Starrie,
They’d crumble
They can dish it out but they can’t take it
#HEHHHEHHEE#HI STARRIEEEEE#moots <33#ask#my art#the name game#tng au#fae au#fae sun#fae moon#disabled reader#witch reader#fnaf sun#dca sun#sun#Sundrop#fnaf moon#dca moon#moon#moondrop#dca fandom#dca au#sun x reader#sun x y/n#moon x reader#moon x y/n#dca x reader#dca x y/n#daycare attendant
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I admire people with disabilities that build a life of success despite their problems
Imagine the reader being Bruce and Selina's baby who suffered from baby shaken syndrome, they ended up going nearly unscathed though it ended up resulting in them growing deaf and have difficulty maneuvering theri limbs, we all know what a helicopter parent Bruce can be and how obsessive Selina is already, so reader ends up thriving despite their injuries, surgeries and even devices are used to help them, everything I monitored and taken care of UNTIL the reader takes interest in vigilante life.
And then, hells breaks loose.
#yandere#blue talks#yandere batman#yandere dc#yandere x reader#yandere batfamily#yandere jason todd#yandere dick grayson#yandere damian wayne#yandere selina kyle#yandere bruce wayne#yandere family#yandere alfred pennyworth#disabled reader#yeah
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Literary Service
Silco Marlowe's tattoo sleeves
made by @yoghurtcup
Go read Literary Service here! fic m.list
#arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x female reader#silco#arcane silco#silco arcane#silco x reader#silco x you#literaryservice#modern au#arcane modern au#teacher x student#teacher kink#league of legends#silco league of legends#disabled reader#fluff#silco fluff#smut#silco smut
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am's interaction with a chronically ill, sick and disabled favorite human of his? one so plagued with their own natural suffering that his barely fazes them.
AM with a disabled/chronically ill favorite human.
// cw hospital mention, AM being AM //
Ah, I have been waiting for this kind of ask for a while.
AM despises humans with all of his hollow soul. He wishes he could move freely, dance without pain, love without consequences.
And he finds you. You, the sick, the fallen, the blind and the ill, are different from the others; AM can't even comprehend how a human, who is supposed to be capable of anything, is in so much pain of its own. AM understands, and he grows fond of you.
The supercomputer begans to care about you. He no longers inflicts pain on you, preferring to isolate you from the others and force you to talk about... you.
AM is a strange being. He doesn't force you into these interrogations just "because", he wants to learn about you, he wants to help you. Either way it hurts you, its not easy to talk about your disabilities/illnes with your tormentor, who knows what kind of unspeakable horrors he will apply to you with said information.
Yet, when you finally open up and talk about it, he becomes very caring to you and only you. AM brings you meds to aid your pain, he lets you have decent mobility aids, he even constructed a special, secret room for when your body just can't go any longer; its like a mini hospital where you can rest.
AM knows that you are not the biggest fan of hospitals, but thats just part of his "love". At the end, he wants you to know that he sees you as an equal regarding pain. AM understands how infuriating it is to only wish to do things others can do so easily.
He couldn't visualize himself in love. How can someone love him with his horrid scars, old eyes & ears, broken legs and curved back. But you, oh you adored every bit, every line of his skin. Because you and him shared the pain no one else could knew in the end of the world.
For a moment, AM was loved, and so were you.
#ask#i have no mouth and i must scream#fuzedatti am#ihnmaims#am x reader#disabled reader#chronically ill reader
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