#x disabled reader

[thatguywrites]

F1 grid with Chronic pain Boyfriend

Verstappen, Piastri, Hamilton, Alonso, Bottas

Headcannons

Max Verstappen

Pays for the highest level medical care for you

Whatever helps your pain the most, braces, medications, straight up weed, you've got it in abundance

He'll always give you massages, or run hot baths for you whenever you need

When you start to get fatigued, and lean on things more than not, he's instantly at your side

He's more than willing to spend a whole day in bed with you if you just don't feel like getting out of bed

Advocates more for disabled people, beyond paralysis, looking into the Chronic pain that racing can cause like the back pain Fernando and Lewis have ended up with

Lewis

Funds a lot of research into your condition and similar other conditions

Speaks out about it a ton

Pays any fees necessary (I mean if mental health is included ig?)

Finds acceptable fashion, things that don't snag on your mobility aids or clash with your braces

Helps you do pt exercises

Considers training Roscoe to be a service animal for you

Decides on getting you a pretrained breed of your choice instead

Fernando Alonso

Makes sure his drivers room always has everything that helps you

Let's use use his body to support your joints

Will massage your joints as long as you agree to massage his back later

Or not, hes not too pressed

He likes buying fun gadgets that are supposed to help

He hates seeing you in pain, so he figures that whatever money can buy you will have

Valtteri Bottas

Encourages you to bike for pt, or to just to move

Finds/designs braces that fit your esthetic so you never feel uncomfortable wearing them

Always brings you to the sauna when yall are in Finland so that your joints don't get too cold

Is also perfectly ok vacationing wherever is best for you

Spain? Sounds good

America? Sure

Japan? Wonderful!

He's also very adaptable day to day, if you need to cancel because of pain he'll never complain

Taglist (Comment or DM to be added)

@koalapastries @justaf1girl @spoonfulofmilo @lokisen

[cherry-pop-elf]

Weasley Siblings Reacting To Your Muscle Spasms ♿️

William ‘Bill’

He can relate.

He has his own issue with them, from his attack by Greyback.

It’s more subtle, and tend to get triggered by stress, but he can be in your shoes.

They DO get worse when the full moon is closer/here. Since a curse breaker, he was able to prevent himself from being turned. But still has side effects.

He doesn’t get startled when you have a bad day, and they get triggered. Nor does it bother him when you both sleep together.

He’s someone who can get it, and often forgets you even have them. When he notices, it’s just another day. He GETS it, and you can have someone to confide in

Charlie

He has them. He has them BAD.

Given he works with dragon’s, and all the time, he has suffered some nerve damage. Amongst just a million other health issues.

He’s turned it into a straight up game on who twitches the most sometimes. Weasleys. You knew what you were signing up for

Since he has his owns, you have a taste of your own medicine of what it’s like to fall asleep with someone who has them.

He genuinely knows what it’s like, and it’s nice to be with someone who gets it. Doesn’t freak out every single time it happens. It’s healing. You two are buddies in this world of muscle tension

Percy

He’s…..anxious. To put it lightly. He’s always been a man that startles easy, which the twins took advantage of, so it’s a lot to get used to.

But, since his older siblings have similar issues, he isn’t going in blind either. He’s the type to be quick to try and learn whatever his partner enjoys/suffers with.

He does get very frustrated, at the start, such as when you have an incident when your knee bumped against the table while he was working. Spilling ink everywhere. He was about to yell, but he recalled a time when Charlie did the same thing. How guilty he felt, and self conscious he was. So, he forced himself to breath, and cleaned up

It’s stressful, but he’s wanting to learn and help any way he can. He finds something like that not a deal breaker. You can’t help it, and neither can his brothers

Sleeping with him is a struggle, and doesn’t happen for a while. Not until you are both deeper in the relationship

Over all, it’s a struggle. He’s an able bodied man dating a disabled partner. But, he grew up with siblings having those similar issues. So, in a morbid sense, seeing and feeling them reminds him of home

Fred

As stated, he has siblings who have similar issues. So he isn’t phased by it nearly. Not to mention he’s most certainly developed some of his own, with being a man that has tested so many wild things on himself for the sake of WWW. Also, ya know, Fireworksexual

He’s the type that teases and would often call you “Jitterbug��� or stuff like that. If you weren’t into that, he would be quick to correct himself. Jokes are to make people laugh after all, and tease those that had it coming. You were born/in an incident. Never had it coming

Given his whole aesthetic being a man of chaos, he doesn’t get bothered by you having flare ups at all. Just another day. But he would be always concerned when you have a bad day. Seeing how intense they can get. Even secretly trying to invent something to help

Given how close him and George are, they would often sneak into bed with each other when having nightmares. So having someone who’s spacing in their sleep doesn’t bother him a lick. But he will have his worries

It’s just part of who you are. And it’s part of who he is. Just one of the flaws that make you so beautiful to him

George

Rather similar to Fred, to many degrees, but he is still an independent person. And is a bit more sensitive to it all

He worries about you a bit more, and can’t help but wonder if they ever hurt. Charlie and Bill say they don’t. Unless they hit something, but still. He’s gonna worry about you when he sees the flares

When he loses his ear, after the war, he developed his own spasms from the trauma it did to his muscles and blood vessels. So he has some, and jokes that you two are twinning now. He immediately cried after saying that

Whenever you have a bad flare up in your sleep, expect to have him hold you closer. Kissing your head, in the hopes it some how. It doesn’t work like that, but he’s a wizard. Maybe it does

He’s going to worry, a lot. But it’s all in good faith, and because he cares. He’s going to try and help somehow whenever he can. And you can’t stop him

Ron

Expect to hear good ole “Bloody Hell-“ Whenever you have a bad one. He gets startled easy, like Percy, but is more audible about it. Over the years he gets better, but expect a lot of it

Growing up with siblings have similar, he doesn’t really get bothered. Just startled. Especially since he hasn’t been around his siblings along growing up, due to the age gap.

He secretly has a talent of reading spasm writing though. Since Bill and Charlie write to the family often. And since it’s ink, you can’t really fix it. So you never have to feel self conscious about your flare ups when writing

He will get startled awake, now and again, when you start sharing a bed. But he refuses to ever tell you that. Knowing how brave you are to attempt it. It’s the least he can do to try and make it work in return

When more of his siblings develop spasm, he feels a weird relief. Like if he never dated you, he couldn’t help them like he could with you

It’s new, but he’s a Weasley. Chaos is in their DNA. It’s just something you can’t control, like he can’t control his nervous ticks. It takes a while to adjust, but that’s kinda basic human nature. To adjust to new things. And you are a new thing here wants to keep

Ginny

Given her Qudditch career and lifestyle, she gets muscle fatigue often. So she can relate to having twitches. Course, having them twenty four seven is a whole other ball game for her

Given her experience, she is happy to help massage your joints and muscles. Using every trick in the book to see if they can help you in any way at all

Given she’s the baby, she didn’t really grow up around her eldest brothers, so she isn’t quite used to the concept of another person having them. Even with her team mates, they are far more subtle and they don’t exactly spend twenty four seven together

She sleeps like a damn brick. So you never have to worry about waking her up. But expect her own leg kicks when it’s been a long day on the field

She’s going to care for you deeply, and use all her special tricks to help you. Even though it doesn’t really work like that, the mental health boost it gives you still does numbers. She is trying because she CAN and WANTS to, and that’s all that matters

[starwarskawaii]

Annoyance and Empanadas

A Miguel O'Hara fic

Alright, here's that Miguel fic. Dedicated to Lan ( @chaithetics ) for always believing in and encouraging me. Proofread by my husband, @kitsunot . So if I made a mistake, blame him.

A/N: This is self-serving, reader is HEAVILY based on me. No word count because I am lazy.

Edit: possible part 2 if you guys like this one. So make sure to let me know!

CW: disabled reader, possible slightly ooc Miguel, mentions of Miguel's *gestures at his life*, no use of Y/N, second person voice, mentions of mobility aids, disability is not specified but is highly based on my experiences with fibromyalgia, female reader, mentions of brain fog, mentions of safe foods, reader is slightly implied to be autistic, PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED ANYTHING

You were annoying. Not annoying like Peter B, who always had a quip and lacked boundaries. Not annoying like Miles, who questioned Miguel constantly. Not even annoying like Hobie, although you were a bit of an anarchist. The first thing you had ever said to Miguel was, "I support women's rights and women's wrongs. I do not, however, support men's rights OR men's wrongs, so I hope you've improved." No, you weren't annoying like any of them. You were annoying like Lyla. You were annoying because you knew him. You knew him entirely too well. Which was quite possibly the worst kind of annoying you could be.

You sauntered in on your purple forearm crutches, thinking of what you could say to piss Miguel off. As much as you'd like to pretend you were a quick thinker, the brain fog made it near impossible to come up with anything on the fly. So as you sauntered in, you thought of what you could do to make those veins pop on his neck and forehead. You liked those veins.

Miguel heard you coming. How could he not? Mobility aids are not stealthy. Not in the least. Miguel knew what was coming, and he braced himself for whatever quip you had up your sleeve. Your quips were worse than a Peter Parker's; you had studied him. You came from a universe Miguel stumbled on accidentally. A world where he and all the other Spiders were just characters in comics and movies. And you happened to be Miguel O'Hara's number one fan (and biggest hater, somehow simultaneously). You had made tons of posts analyzing him on some site, tumbling, maybe? He couldn't remember. He brought you on for a few reasons, but mainly to help the algorithms predict events in the Spider's lives.

"Ohhh, Miiiiiggy!" Came your voice, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"What? I'm a bit busy, you know, " came his reply.

"Too busy for me, Migs?" You pouted and batted your lashes. You knew he couldn't resist that.

Miguel was surprised. No quips yet. That's a first.

"Too busy brooding to listen to your favorite right-hand woman?" There it was. There was the jibe at him. You loved doing that. You were probably worse than Lyla.

Lyla popped up and snickered "He was just brooding, how did you know?"

"Lucky guess. Migs, my love, would you care to tell me why the caf has no empanadas?"

"Aye, you came here to interrupt my ensuring the fate of the Arachno-humanoid poly-multiverse over an empanda?"

"They're your recipe, we all know they're the best in the multiverse" you reasoned with him.

"They're my mother's recipe, technically, and I'll make you some when I take you home." Miguel always took you home. You had a lot of issues with the stupid 2099 high-tech stuff, and it also required use of at least one hand, something you rarely had the luxury of, unless it was a no mobility aid or a wheelchair day. So Miguel made sure you were safe.

"Fine, fine. When are you taking me home, speaking of? Should I just wait here, or should I try to navigate the awful upside down maze you created while I wait for your self-imposed penance for the day to end?" Man you were annoying. Man you knew him well.

"I'll finish up soon. Wait here," his face softened as he looked over at you. You were making yourself comfortable on a chair, placing your aids to the side and getting into that position you liked to sit in. The one that seemed uncomfortable, but you swore was best for your hypermobile joints.

You reminded him a lot of Lyla. Lyla, who Xina had programmed to heckle him. Lyla, who he never had the heart to reprogram. You knew all his buttons. Just like Lyla. Just like Xina... You were also like Gwen. He had initially seen you as much more like Gwen. You had a baby face, so he had assumed you were younger. You had half-shaved hair, which you had actually gotten done because of some singer in your dimension, the year before Spiderverse came out. You had always loved Gwen Stacy, though. It wasn't hard to see why. You were smart, you liked nerds, you were incredibly confident, you were kind of punk, but also hilariously materialistic, not in a fancy clothes way but in a "I have to have this figure or I will cry" way. You were a lot like the Gwen of 120703. You loved that Gwen.

You were very different from all of them, though. He remembered stumbling upon your dimension by accident. A dimension where there were no heroes. A dimension where there were somehow still supervillains. A dimension where, even when faced with a lack of heroes, some people still had hope. You were one of them. He had initially infantalized you. Your mobility aids, your interests, the baby face, the fact that you clearly needed a caregiver, but stubbornly lived on your own all made him see you as younger than you were. You had had many arguments before he finally realized how capable you are. That you're tougher than most Spiders are, save for Sun Spider, who has EDS (you LOVED Sun Spider). That you deal with 24/7 full body pain, work a full-time job, and somehow manage to take care of yourself.

You had shown him so much. Like punk versions of him that you thought were hot. He hated them. He hated that you found that attractive. It made him question for a moment if his appearance was alright. Of course, you would like piercings and tattoos. You had multiple of each. He never really thought much of it before. You had shown him art of him pregnant. You both hated that one. He had learned so much about you. In a way, he had become the caregiver you needed. He made sure you ate, he popped into your dimension to help with your laundry, he helped you on low mobility days, he cooked for you, he helped you set up appointments and refill meds when your brain just wouldn't cooperate. He admired you. He thought you were incredibly strong. He made you empanadas because they're a safe food for you. He secretly loved the way you loved his cooking.

You cared for him. Really, truly, deeply cared. You had listened to his pain and felt it like it was your own. You were so empathetic. He realized that your disabilities and baby face and your being a few years younger didn't matter at all. You were more mature than he was. You knew pain, you lived with pain, you had lost so much and had dealt with it a long time ago. You helped him pick apart his mind, healing what had been broken by grief. He had spent so many nights sitting on the floor of your apartment, next to your couch, pouring his heart out to you. The girl who had fan art of him up on her walls. He was pretty sure he loved you, but too worried he was confusing gratefulness for that painful emotion he hadn't felt in so long that he couldn't bring himself to say anything. You were in love. How could you not be? He let you see him so vulnerable. He was also 6'9, built like a tank, perfect dark skin and hair, newly emotionally open, and had clearly come to genuinely respect you, in a way you struggled to find as a disabled woman. You were much less subtle about your feelings than he was. You flirted constantly. But he was as dense as his muscles.

"Alright, I'm done, cariño," Miguel said. "Time to go back to your dimension, and get you some food. Did you actually eat today?"

"Uhhhh, what answer do you want to that?" You said, only half joking, with a nervous laugh.

"You'll be the death of me, hermosa"

He was used to the quips. He was used to the forgetting to eat. He was used to it all, and he hoped it could stay that way. Miguel O'Hara loved how you annoyed him. And he hoped you would continue to, for at least as long as Lyla has.

[crybaby-writings]

leona kingscholar is a DISABILITY ALLY!

if he found out you needed a new mobility aid, or medical device, or where you were living/going wasn't accessible, he would help you get what you needed, whether you asked him to or not!

he would bring your toothbrush to you with toothpaste already on it and a cup to spit in if you couldn't get out of bed! he regularly contributes his own money to research foundations!

he keeps a glucometer set on him at all times, and allergen free snacks! he has a backpack full of extra speciality medical supplies/medications that are for the members of his dorm/the spelldrive team so that they never have to worry about not being prepared!

he never wants anyone to feel left out or like they need to hold themselves back because of their disabilities! everyone deserves to have unrestricted access to the proper health care they need!

[nixie-writes]

I love the blind/mute one!

If you’re interested, how about something similar with a reader that’s missing an arm? How Charlie, Alastor, and Angel met them/got close?

neato! I don't see a lot of representation for physically disabled peeps in this community. I did platonic headcanons for this because I liked that direction more than a romantic one.

Alastor

-he met you during a stroll to Cannibal Cafe. He initially didn't think much of you but was interested in the fact you were missing an arm. When he asked you about it you were cool with it, you weren't offended. He liked that about you. He offered to pay for your meal and after that you two kept meeting there, him always covering your meal in exchange for learning more about you and how you work despite your disability.

-you grew closer over time and eventually Alastor mentioned the hotel, telling you that while the idea was ridiculous there were kind demons who could take care of you. You took him up on that offer and he brought you to the hotel, where you signed up for a room and took stock across the hall from him. Every night he sends a shadow to your room to bid you a good night.

Angel Dust

-you met late one night, after Angel had done a shoot. He was out in a less populated part of Pride looking for bad news. You'd heard of him and knew he worked for Valentino, infamous for his abuse to his employees. Angel looked beaten and bruised. You approached him slowly and offered to buy him a drink to lift his mood. He laughed sourly and agreed, who would turn down a free drink? After a little time spent in a seedy bar he gave you his number and left. You called him nightly and he updated you on his night and you told him about your life.

-you grew closer with each call. He began trusting you with sensitive details of his work and you trusted him with the less savory aspects of your own life. He eventually mentioned the hotel he was living in to support himself and suggested you check it out if you ever needed cheap rent. You took up his offer and after mentioning him to the clerk you were given a free room to stay in not far from Angel's. He's still a bit reserved but he always makes a point to sit with you at meal time and buy you a drink sometimes.

Charlie

-she's shocked, you poor thing! She met you during one of her campaigns, you were in a small crowd of listening demons. You were the only one who seemed genuinely interested. After the other demons dispersed she asked you about your arm and you explained how you lost it/were born without it and didn't take any offense to her blunt question. She told you that the hotel had some vacant rooms and she could offer you a free place to stay if you wanted, and there were other demons who could take care of you. Since it's Hell and everyone is out to kill each other you took her offer of free residency, knowing you were just considered easy murder fodder to other demons.

-you grew closer as you adjusted to the hotel. You were kind to the other demons, even Alastor, who made you the ass of his sadistic jokes. You loved cooking with Niffty and got along swell with Vaggie, who took you under her wing to protect you. You were friendly to Angel despite his advances. You spent time playing games with Husk and regardless of your skill with a hand of cards you let him win to stroke his ego and put him in an unusually good mood. She appreciated that you were so kind to everyone and loved you for it, you were her best friend! With time you became inseparable and Vaggie considered you more like a sister.

[johndoerp]

I love all your forms!!

But I think your so cute in your lil hair form! You'd be like my little teddy I could cuddle 🥺

Doe gasps excitedly and quickly transforms into said forms, purring as he sits completely content on your lap.

[1-ker0sene-1]

Poly 141 x Reader

Home is where you are

"What ye think she made this time?"

Johnny mumbles, dropping his head back against the seat behind him. Blinking tiredly up at the ceiling of the truck, a daydream clear in his eyes. Simon next to him stares out the window, sweat seems to practically seal his balaclava to his face.

"We'd be lucky if anything. It's three in the fucking morning.."

Kyle says from the passenger seat. Pursing his lips a bit.

"She should be sleeping.."

Price chuckles from the driver's seat, hand on the steering wheel, paying close attention to the road.

"She knows we're on our way home. If she made something. We'll be thankful."

His other hand is resting on Kyle's knee, his thumb rubs slow circles against him.

Simons foot taps on the floor of the car silently, brows tight together. The man just wants to go home, shower, eat whatever heaven you cooked and sink into that california king mattress. With all of you, all five of you together.

"Steaks."

He mutters.

"Hm?"

Johnny questions with a hum, Simon clarifies.

"On days we come home.. it's either steak or shepherds pie. She made shepherds pie last time so it's gonna be steak."

They all salivate at the damn thought.

"It's tha little things with ye huh Simon?"

Johnny smiles warmly, leaning on his shoulder.

It was another thirty minutes driving before they finally pulled into the secluded driveway. Their safehouse. Their home. Where you are. Filing out of the truck, bags over their shoulders. Covered in grime and dried blood, they didn't even let themselves clean up at base before going home to you. Walking forward, Simon slings an arm around Kyle's shoulder. Tucking the sargeant into his side as they walk to the house. Both Johns walking behind them, Price giving the younger a good slap on the back.

"Home, boys. Let's enjoy it while we can."

Price comes forward to unlock the front door, pushing it open for the four of them. Mumbling out a reminder to take off their shoes inside. Leaning down with a grunt to pull off his boots. The others doing the same. They can already smell what you're cooking, Simon was right. The smell of steaks is pretty clear, garlic butter, some kind of steamed vegetables and spices.

The house is clean. Warm. Low lighting, some candles lit. Everything about it screams home. John opens his mouth to call out for you, but he can feel his spine practically melt hearing you hum in the kitchen.

Johnny is the first stumbling forward, hopping on one leg as he throws off his remaining shoe. Eager to get back to you. Grinning as he comes around the corner into the kitchen. He melts. Seeing you there, in your chair dishing up their plates of dinner.

".. Hey lass.."

He mumbles, feeling like all the air left his chest.

You turn your head when you hear him, the brightest smile spreads across your face. Tossing the fork down from your hand as you turn towards him.

"Hey soldier-"

You beam. You don't even get another word in before Johnny rushes towards you, you let out a puff of air as he crashes into you. Laughing against him as he squeezes you to his chest, his face buried in your hair.

"Fuckin' missed ye hen.."

He whispers. You return with one of your own.

"I know baby.. I missed you too.."

You lift your head, kissing the scar on his chin.

"This bloke botherin' you love?"

You already know that voice immediately, smiling as you turn to look at Kyle. Who is quick at your side with Johnny, his hand cups the back of your head. Pressing a long kiss to your cheek. Taking a deep inhale of your scent through his nose. You smile warmly, your hand finds his bicep, giving a soft squeeze.

"There you are Kyle.."

You murmur, turning your head to press your own kisses across the bridge of his nose.

"Always here."

He chirps, kissing on your skin. His eyes bore into you, drinking you up. Johnny huffs, mumbling something about stealing all your attention. Earning a small tug on his mowhawk from you.

"Alright you two- showers. The both of you. You need it-"

You chuckle, giving them both a hug. Giving Johnny one more kiss on the jaw. Letting Gaz get one more kiss on your face. Watching them head past you down the hall to the bathroom. Kissing on eachother, bumping into walls. You shake your head at them with a smile.

Eyes flicking back to the entrance. You find Simon staring at you, his shoulders slack and sinking. Eyes half lidded and tired. The rest of his face under the balaclava. Your eyes soften, holding out your hand to him.

"Oh Si.."

He takes the invitation. Coming over to you. He would tower over you in height. But instead he falls to one knee in front of your chair. Hands resting on the arm rests of your chair. Your hands immediately cradle his head. Leaning forward to press your head to his.

"You're home.. it's alright now .. no more Lieutenant.."

You whisper against him. Your fingertips lift the edge of the balaclava, pulling it over the nape of his neck. Over the back of his head, nails dragging soothingly up his scalp as you take the fabric away. Making him shiver in vulnerability. Putting his mask aside on the counter.

Seeing your Simons face eases the both of you, cupping his jaw and lifting his head.

"I know doll.. I know."

He mutters, you kiss his temple. Caressing his skin. Threading your fingers into his hair.

"Go shower with the boys sweetheart.. I'll be in there soon."

You coo at him. He chuckles deeply, kissing your head between your brows as he gets up. Bumping your foreheads together one more time before walking to the bathroom.

"You're not gonna say hello to me John?"

You joke, turning your head to watch said Captain. Who was holding his hat in hand, leaning against the wall watching you. He's been watching you the whole time.

"Just seein' you with our boys darlin'.."

Pushing away from the wall he walks over to you. His eyes full of exhaustion, longing, warmth. Tossing his hat on the counter behind you. He leans down, callous hands hold your cheeks. Bringing your lips to his.

He's not as sneaky as he thinks. You know of his little demand to the boys. He's the first to kiss you. Each time they come home.

You kiss him back feverishly, as much as you've been calm and steady for them. You missed your men like hell. Your hands find his shoulders, squeezing them tightly, beginning to work on the knots of tension in them. Emitting a deep groan from John into your mouth. You smile against his lips, feeling the scratch off his beard.

"Everyone's alright?"

You whisper against him. He nods, his hands finding your hips. Slightly lifting you from your chair and towards himself.

"No one's broken. .. Kyle's a little stressed. Y'know how he is.."

You nod, eyes still closed, continuing to brush your lips together.

"And you?"

"Just tired.. But I'm home. That's what matters."

John mumbles, kissing you deep again. Dipping his tongue past your lips, a soft sigh slipping out of you. Arms pulling him closer.

"Taking good care of our boys John.. You always do.. Making sure you all come home to me again... Our strong Captain.."

You can feel him sinking at your praise. The older mans knees want to buckle at your voice.

"Let's get you in the shower baby.. Hm? Get you washed and relaxed.."

You mumble against him.

You yelp as your lifted into the air by his arms, laughing openly as he carries you like a bride. Burying his nose to the crook of your neck. Carrying you down the hall, to the bathroom door. Where you can already hear the chatter of the men in the shower waiting for the two of you. John is grumbling against your skin.

"We need you darlin'. "

"Our boys and I need you bad.."

[hexcii]

Silly TNG stuff

[dawneternal]

now my head's splitting at the seams

✴︎ in the labyrinth of my pain, would you find me?

✴︎ Azriel x Valkyrie reader, platonic Cassian x reader

✴︎ Summary: you miss a few days of training, down with a bad migraine. It turns out Cassian has a few misconceptions about your condition and, possibly, about pain itself.

✴︎ Warnings: mentions of nausea and vomiting (no descriptions), pain, toxic positivity and ableism, internalized ableism, Cassian's a jerk in the first half. Also I'm so sorry for the tense changing back and forth 💀 I would definitely not call this one a masterpiece

✴︎ Word Count: 3.4k

AO3 Link / Writing Masterlist

✴︎ Notes: somehow writing out my feelings about having a migraine turned into something pretentious about pain and ableism. I think a lot about John Green's "pain is the opposite of language" and how much that's changed my perception of pain

Also listen I love Cassian and I have no problems with him but I had to pick someone to take my feelings out on I'm sorry 💛 also just want to acknowledge that everyone experiences migraines differently and it's not a topic I'm an expert on so I'm sorry if you don't feel well represented by this.

Tbh I could write several essays about the way pain and disability are handled in the acotar books but that's for another time.

Letting out a frustrated groan, you squeeze your eyes shut tighter and twist your knuckle into the pressure point at the base of your palm, chasing the momentary relief it'll give you from your nausea. It works for a minute, and you're considering making your way to the bathroom before another wave hits you when your bedroom door flies open.

"You're late," Cassian's voice bellows through the room and he doesn't see you wince. He strides into the room, footsteps booming across the floorboards, and he's left the door open behind him, letting a traitorous amount of light into your dark room. What good were black out curtains if your darkness was going to be invaded like this anyways?

"Oh my gods you've got to talk quieter," You curl tighter around yourself, head clutched in your hands.

"So you're hungover?" He stops near your bed, arms crossed as he towers over you.

"No, I have a migraine."

"Isn't that the same thing?"

You squint up at him, scowling, swallowing every bad word threatening to spill off your tongue. Though maybe he deserves it for coming into your room without asking.

"Please leave," You say quietly, all the venom you could usually imbue into your voice completely swallowed by your current condition.

"You've missed three days of training." He says by way of answering, definitely not following your request to lower his volume. "You can't coddle yourself like this."

His words punch the air from your lungs. Coddle? Something terrible is rising in your gut, along with the desperate thought that you can't deal with this right now.

"I'm not - this isn't - I don't think you understand how much it hurts." You scramble for words, cheeks heated from pain and anger.

"You've gotta push through it," He says, no hint of sympathy.

"Cassian please."

"I'm not leaving until you agree to come with me."

You don't have time to respond before you're running to the bathroom and throwing up whatever you'd managed to keep down last night, head throbbing with every movement.

Breathing hard, you lean back from the toilet and clutch your head in your hands. The silence rings in your ears and you aren't sure if Cassian is still there or if he finally took mercy on you and left, until his voice makes it's way to you, with just a hint of remorse in it -

"I'd better see you up there."

⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

Cassian did not see you at training that morning, and you're assuming you've bruised his ego because the next day he doubles down.

The thing is, Rhysand knew of your condition. The other priestesses knew. It's only Cassian being out of the loop and if he understood what a migraine felt like, you're certain he wouldn't be dragging you up there. You were used to dealing with people who didn't understand, had worked hard to learn how to give yourself kindness no matter what other people said. But it's like he knew exactly what things to say, what buttons to press to undo all of that progress.

It was like he'd pulled off your armor, piece by piece, leaving you cold and exposed. Going back to that world where weakness was your given name and it hurt worse than stepping into the ring and fighting the pain. If you could prove him wrong, just make it through a couple of hours, you could return to your sanctuary of darkness. And at least then, you wouldn't hate yourself on top of everything else.

So you followed him up to the training ring, struggling to open your eyes all the way in the morning light, hunched over to make the pain down your shoulders and neck just a bit more bearable. You sway on your feet, but Cassian either doesn't notice or doesn't care.

When he moves aside, revealing your small, huddled frame trailing beside him, Gwyn gasps.

"Cassian!" She cries, her tone scathing, and the hint of smug triumph slips from his face. It disappears completely as Gwyn rushes to your side, folding you into her arms to block your eyes from the light. You groan into her shoulder and go limp in her arms, grateful for the support.

Azriel stands to the side, watching with narrowed eyes. His arms are crossed over his chest like Cassian's, but there is no determination or judgment in his posture or expression. There's angry, crackling flames as he watches the redheaded Valkyrie thread her fingers through your hair and murmur soft comfort.

"She missed training all this week," Cassian says, but he's not barking any more. He's feeling a little bit small underneath the glares that pin him where he stands.

"Yeah, we know," Gwyn says, and it's the closest she's gotten to snapping at him in the whole time they've known each other. She turns to you and her eyes soften. "Let's get you back to bed, love."

"No," You murmur, guilt and shame bringing your resolve to the surface once more. You gently push her away to stand on your own, raising your squinted eyes to meet Cassian's. "I can do it. I'll be fine."

She watches you take shaky steps to the nearest mat and begin stretching, body obviously stiff from a few days in bed. You're conscious of all the eyes on you, far too sympathetic for your liking. This is exactly what you hated.

"Are we starting or not?" You let out a stiff laugh, too aware that your words are lightly slurred. That is absolutely not helping the hangover accusations.

The other priestesses shuffle to get into place, bumping into each other as they move to find their positions. There was still a horrible silence, crackling with fierce anger, all rippling in Cassian's direction. He halfheartedly called a few orders, visibly uncomfortable with the energy in the ring.

And you tried. You tried hard. To move your body through the stretches like normal. But your muscles protested every move, threatening to lock back up, sending stabs of pain through your skull. It didn't take long for the nausea to take over, forcing you to the edge of the ring, doubled over and dry heaving.

"This is ridiculous," Gwyn scoffs before she's at your side again. "You're going to back to bed."

"I will not be weak," You growl at her, panting as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, "I am not lazy."

Gwyn's head snaps around to find Cassian, mouth dropped open in fury as she silently dares him to confirm that he may have suggested weakness to you.

"You're not and you know it," She says softly, hauling you up and leading you away from the training ring. “Don't do that to yourself.”

Cassian is feeling like he's surrounded by wolves, all the glares that are being sent his way. He understands by now that he's messed up, and in front of a group that may not be easily inclined to forgive him. He's sure every single one of them has experienced the disbelief that he foolishly shoved your way. For their pain, or for anything else.

He thought you would snap back to your normal self after a bit of warming up, shake off your symptoms with a bit of movement and sunshine. You were strong enough to, if you wanted to. He'd seen it before. He thought you just didn't want to.

A small, firm hand lands on his arm and he finds himself looking down at Nesta. There's sympathy in her expression, but her eyes twinkle with the threat of a nasty bite if he dares to say anything stupid.

"She gets them after particularly bad flashbacks," Nesta says, "Or sometimes they're just random. Madja says there's no fix for the pain but darkness and sleep."

Cassian's stomach twists so terribly he thinks he might puke, too. In the midst of attempting to instill resilience, he's understanding that he knows nothing of this kind of pain. This is something different, something that cannot be conquered in the same way as emotional pain, as every day aches and injuries. You are a soldier in a battle he has no strategy for.

He may understand the concept of emotional resilience, of getting back up and into the training ring when you don't want to. But this is different.

The final blow, the thing that makes him want to cower and hide, is meeting his brother's eyes. Seeing the fire there transports him back in time, sending flashes of a smaller Azriel pushing himself too hard, determined to show the world that he'd never be less because of the damage to his hands. Fighting against words far too similar to the ones his own brother had spouted to you this morning, desperate to become strong enough that no one would ever doubt his pain and live.

⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

It was not a surprise that Cassian found himself in Rhysand's office later, confessing how thoroughly he'd fucked up, desperate for a little direction in how to fix this mess.

"It has to be their choice," Rhysand is saying, eyes meeting Cassian's over his glass.

Cassian's mouth opens and closes as he tries to conjure a response. He knows that. Of course he knows that. But apparently, his brain had not wrapped around how far that concept might go.

Cassian let out a grunt as he sat back in his chair, arms crossed. Rhysand knew he didn't have to push any further, he recognized the conflict in his brother's eyes. So he sat with him, quiet, while he processed.

"Do you want to know what it feels like?" He broke the since after a while, as the idea came to him.

"What?" Cassian blinked, startled from his thoughts.

"A migraine," Rhys explained, "Do you want to know what it feels like?"

Cassian frowned, studying his brother's expression for anything resembling amusement, but there was none. So he nods.

Not even a full second later, his skull is attacked with throbbing pain, deep in the base of his neck. He hadn't even noticed the fae lights before, but now they overwhelm him, causing a dull pain to surface behind his eyes. Nausea curled up his throat, threatening ruthlessly.

"Oh gods," He leaned forward and clutched his head in his hands, finding that his limbs trembled under his own weight.

"Do you push yourself when you feel like this?" Rhysand asked softly, not taunting. Prompting.

"I don't really ever feel like this," Cassian grumbled out.

"Hm," Rhysand mused, his brows drawing together. He'd experienced episodes like these often, under the mountain. He knew that Azriel struggled with them through his teenage years, like his brain still struggled to process his senses outside of a dark cell.

Deep in thought, he only remembered to ease up on Cassian's mind when his brother whimpered.

"Some say pain cannot truly be described with language," Rhys says, gaze somewhere else as Cassian gulps down air. "And that your pain is one of the few things that is truly yours, that you can never share. Even if you manage to describe it, it will never be felt by anyone else."

"I thought she was just hungover," Cassian says, but he's not defending himself. Rhysand knows.

"What if she was, though?" He tilts his head to the side, watching his brother carefully.

And that is the thing that had begun to unfurl within Cassian as he stood surrounded by the priestesses he'd wronged. He understood that having true control of your body meant that dictating how pain is handled had to be yours, too. He understood that pushing someone to deal with pain in his own way was a violation in and of itself. He had stepped into the world that you had carefully balanced and re-built around your condition and dared to tell you that you may have done it wrong.

"Will she get better?" He asks, thinking of the agony he'd just experienced for a few short minutes. The same one that you'd been experiencing for three days, now.

"It's hard to say," Rhysand shrugs, "Madja says she will likely experience these off and on for the rest of her life, but she may have some periods of remission."

He tilts his head at his brother again, "You know that a majority of the priestesses have an invisible disability of similar kinds, right? They won't get better. They will be in pain every day until they die."

Rhysand sighs, thinking of the hundreds - possibly thousands - of tins of salve that Azriel has gone through, numbing the pain of his nerve damage. Trembling hands hidden in black gloves, tucked into his body and away from the world. And that is the reason he's bothering telling Cassian of any of this. Otherwise, he might let him figure it out on his own.

"But the healers-" Cassian begins.

"Are there to help them cope with their emotional pain and trauma," Rhysand nods, "But some of them, a lot of them, were disabled as a result of what they went through and will never get better. Like Clotho.”

Oh.

It clicks in Cassian's mind, then. Who else Rhys meant. Who else Cassian had insulted. He had never barged into Azriel's room, insisting that he still train even when he could not flex his fingers without wincing, without trembling too hard to hold a glass of water. But he'd done it to you, in front of him. And that pinned his disbelief on Azriel all the same.

Azriel's pain, your pain, were enemies that neither of you could defeat. And here he was, shoving a sword into your hands, and insisting that you try.

⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

A soft knock sounds against your door, so quiet you almost don't hear it. You stare at it, wondering if you should pretend that you didn't. But then the knob turns slowly and it opens just a crack, and a soft voice is saying into the darkness,

"Hey, it's Azriel. Can I come in?"

Your breath catches in your throat, and you watch his shadows dancing back and forth through the thin wedge of light he's letting in.

"Sure," You say, moving quickly to smooth your rumpled clothes and tangled hair before he steps in. You're not exactly sure what he thinks of you after this morning.

He steps inside and closes the door behind him. His eyes seem to glow in the darkness, an amber-honey color, and somehow you can still see his shadows, like they're even darker than your room with no light.

"I just wanted to check on you," He says, crouching down beside your bed so you don't have to sit up.

"I'm okay," You say, still getting over the surprise of the Shadowsinger in your space. It's true, though, you suppose. You're used to all of your other symptoms by now, and your heart hurts worse than your head.

"He's an idiot sometimes," Azriel says, basically spits. A smile begins to spread on your face so he continues, “Like, sometimes he's just an asshole, straight up. But this time, believe it or not, I think he actually meant well and was just an idiot.”

“I know,” You give him a sad smile and all of the anger melts from his face.

“I think he went to buy flowers if that makes you feel any better,” He sighs. You know he's just as mad at Cassian as you are, maybe even more mad. But he still can't help vouching for him. It's definitely going to take more than flowers to forgive him, but it's a good start. You also appreciate that Azriel has bothered to warn you ahead of time, in case you wanted to avoid Cassian's apology.

“How are you feeling?” He asks, so quietly. And you wonder who else has earned this tenderness from him.

“It's not too bad right now,” you say truthfully, though you know that sitting up or going outside might be pushing your luck.

“Still hurts?”

“Yeah. Still hurts.”

He nods. “I can try something that helps me, sometimes.”

You search his eyes for a moment, then nod.

“Can I touch your face?” He asks, almost a whisper.

Your heart leaps into your throat and you fight to keep your face neutral as you nod again, no idea what he's planning to do with you.

Slowly, leaving enough time for you to stop him, he reaches out. He's not wearing gloves, like usual, and in the dark you can just barely make out the uneven silhouette of his dimpled, scarred hands.

His fingers land gently on your forehead, and he presses his thumb between your brows. Gently at first, and then harder, circling a tender point under your skin. It makes the pain in your head sharper, and you let out a hiss.

“I know,” He says, “Bear with me a minute.”

You close your eyes, biting back a whimper, but after a moment the pain begins to ease. He keeps going for a few minutes and you feel your whole body relax, pain free for the first time in days.

You don't realize how much you've leaned into his touch until he gently pulls away and you find your head falling forward with him.

“What is that?” You open your eyes and blink at him.

“A pressure point,” He grins, and it almost looks like he's blushing.

“That's magical,” you say. You hesitate for a moment, and then, “you can sit on the bed if you want.”

Azriel smiles and straightens, and you move your pillow to the side to make space for him. He slides off his boots and sits on the bed next to you, legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles. You place your pillow next to his lap and settle back into it.

“Thank you,” You say, your body feeling lighter than it has in days.

“Of course,” he says.

A silence settles, but it's not uncomfortable. There's something in it that you understand. He's just keeping you company. Here to sit with you in your pain.

It's easy to relax in his presence, between his calm aura and the pain relief he's offered you. And you find yourself spilling the question that's been circling though your mind since this morning.

“What if I can't fight, someday? What if I can't be a Valkyrie anymore?”

Azriel stills beside you. It's a long moment before he says anything. You're tense beside him, and it makes you flinch when he brings his hand so gently to rest on your head. Not moving, just resting.

“First,” He says, in the same soft voice, “You'll always be a Valkyrie. Because you cut the ribbon. Because you sisters will never let you go. And because I know for a fact that the Valkyries did not strip their warriors of their title if they became disabled by an illness or an injury.”

“Really?” You breathe.

“Mhm,” He hums in affirmation. You forget sometimes that he knows the Valkyries from more than history books.

“And second,” His voice drops lower, like he's sharing a secret with you. His hand moves, fingers slipping gingerly through your hair. And it makes you realize that he came here with his hands uncovered as an offer of solidarity. Combing his scarred fingers through your hair, he is offering you vulnerability, like recompense for what you bared this morning. A trade. A truce.

“If you cannot fight,” He continues, “Then you will show the world that a formidable woman can be made from more than fighting skills. You will still be - will always be - something incredible.”

Tears prickle at your eyes, form a lump in your throat. You reach up to grasp his hand, the only thank you that you can manage in the moment, and he lets you.

There's another silence, as he holds your hand in the dark.

“Who helps you?” You ask, turning to look up at him. He watches your eyebrows knit together, so serious, and he swallows a smile.

“What do you mean?” He says.

You bring one finger up to tap the space between his own eyebrows.

“With your pain? Who helps you like you helped me?”

“Um,” He shrugs, “Sometimes Rhys if he has time. Otherwise, no one.”

That's what you thought, but it still makes your heart twist in your chest. It takes a deep breath before you have the courage to say the next words out loud.

“You should tell me next time you're in pain. And I'll help.”

Azriel stares back at you, something bewildered in his eyes. Because he sees your suggestion for what it is. The same thing he offered you. A trade. A truce.

A beginning.

“Yes,” He whispers into the dark, and his hand closes around yours. “I will.”

[cherry-pop-elf]

Master List ✍️

((WIP duh))

Fluff: 🩷

Angst: 💔

Smut:🫦

Disability’s: ♿️

Platonic: 🫂

Hurt/Comfort: ❤️‍🩹

Triggering Topics:❌

Violence/Gore: 🔪

Weasley Siblings

Nickname Headcanons 🩷

Muscle Spasms Headcanons 🩷♿️

Reacting To A Tattoo Inspired By Them🩷

Baking Headcanons🩷

Safe This Night ❤️‍🩹🩷♿️

Kissing The Siblings 🩷

Reaction To SelfHarm ❤️‍🩹♿️💔❌

Reaction To Agere 🩷

Amortentia 🩷

Reacting to you saying you are pregnant 🩷

Reacting to you coming out as trans 🏳️‍⚧️ ❤️‍🩹🩷

What Nicknames they like to be called 🩷

Firebender Types 🩷

Giving You A Mani-Pedi🩷

Bill Aka William

Unleashed 🫦 🩷

Farmers Market 🩷 🫂

Percy

Work Load 🫦

Fred

Cold Hands, Warm Heart ❤️‍🩹

Sucker 🫦

Warming Up The New Client 🫦

George Weasley

Morning Routine/X Wheelchair Reader 🩷♿️

Training/X Wheelchair Reader 🩷♿️

Disabled George Headcanons ♿️

Princess Treatment/X AMAB Wheelchair Reader 🫦 ♿️ 🩷

Angel With A Ticket/ KnightBus Reader ❤️‍🩹

Handsome Man: Trans George 🫦

Aquarium 🩷

Realistic 🫦

Curious ❤️‍🩹 🩷

Daycare ❤️‍🩹🩷

Every Perfect Curve ❌ 🩷

Happy Birthday To We ❤️‍🩹 💔

Cuddle Party 🩷

Kissable ❌❤️‍🩹

Detox Day🫦🩷

SFW Alphabet 🩷 ❤️‍🩹

Breakfast 🩷

Drink With Me 🩷

Fred And George

Pretty Rain Cloud ❤️‍🩹

Honey Wounds ❤️‍🩹 ❌

Birthday Boys 🫦

Hoof Race ❤️‍🩹🔪 🫂

Snuggle Company 🩷 🫂

Sweet As Sweets 🩷 🫂❤️‍🩹

Ron

Home Sweet Home 🩷

Draco Malfoy

Newly Made Man 🩷

Sirius Black

Honey, I’m Home! 🩷🫦❤️‍🩹

Remus Lupin

Big Bad Wolf 🔪 🩷 ❤️‍🩹

Not Called Moony For Nothing🫦🩷

Newt Scamander

Late Night Cutie Pie 🩷

Severus Snape

Morning Classes🩷

Charlie x Shouren

More🩷♿️

HPMA

Diary Of A Tavern Keeper 💔

Tall Glass Of Wine: Gridley X Reader 🫦

Abigail Grey

S.P.E.W For Werewolves 🩷🫂❤️‍🩹♿️

Shouren

Disabled Headcanons 🩷♿️

Need A Hand 🩷 ♿️ 🫦

What In Hell Is Bad?

Morax

Moment Of Peace ❤️‍🩹🩷♿️

Fairy Odd Parents

Peri ‘Poof’ Fairy-Cosma

Flowers For You 🩷

Human Nature 🩷 🫦

Slashers

Over for dinner 🩷 🔪 ❌

Mouthwashing

Curly

Kiss it better Series! (In progress)

♿️ ❌ ❤️‍🩹 🔪 💔

Anya

New Chapter ❌ 🫂❤️‍🩹

Break Him Back ❌ 🔪 ❤️‍🩹

Crew

Your Own Happy Ending ❤️‍🩹❌ 🔪 🫂

[starwarskawaii]

Annoyance and Empanadas Pt. 2

A Miguel O'Hara fic

A/N: In which I make yet another self-insert fic. This will probably be a series. If I make a couple other disabled folks and Miguel-actually-has-a-personality-not-just-a-hot-body understanders happy, it's all worth it.

edit: Just a warning, this one is longer

CW: Reader is implied again to be autistic, or just awkward as hell, 2099 cursing, more mentions of chronic pain, mentions of past hurt due to disability for reader, reader has a brother, reader has a niece, brief suggestive content, still pretty PG, one use of damn, pretty much same content as last one, tone is a little more serious than pt 1

Miguel stepped into your apartment with you. Your messy apartment. Shock, how did you live like this?! There were blankets everywhere, you never made your bed (a complete waste of time, you had no one to impress), your laundry was permanently overflowing (how did you own this much clothing?!), there were figures and dolls and knick knacks absolutely everywhere, books stacked haphazardly on shelves in an attempt to make them all fit, comics tucked in between, fan art on the walls... There was so much sensory input he almost felt dizzy.

You flopped down on the couch, somehow hitting your leg with a forearm crutch on the way down. Only you. You tossed the aids aside and Miguel picked them up off of the ground and leaned them against the doorway. You almost never used aids inside your apartment unless it was a bad day. Better to fall at home than in front of a bunch of strangers, was your reasoning. Miguel did not agree with your reasoning. Miguel kind of wondered how you had managed to stay alive before him.

As you cozied up on the couch, Miguel began to make your empanadas. Beef and cheese, your favorite. You never had a taste for the chicken. Admittedly, neither had he, so this suited him just fine. You two had fallen into a sort of routine. Monday through Friday you worked your normal job, and he would come by after you got home to cook with you and help with all the things you would never ask him to go out of his way for but needed, and Saturday you would spend the day at the Spider Society, helping Miguel map out Spider's lives. He used to work extremely long hours, since most other Spiders would have to go home, and he technically already was home. But since you came into his life, he had finally learned to delegate more.

Today was Saturday. You loved Saturdays, and so did Miguel, though neither of you had ever actually told the other. Maybe, Miguel thought, maybe it was time to tell you. He knew you were attracted to him, physically at least. He knew you cared about him. He just wasn't sure if you loved him like he loved you. But something in him as he made those empanadas and reflected on your routines together made him realize that those feelings, the ones he wasn't sure whether they were gratitude or love, were absolutely love.

You sat on the couch, holding a plush and willing yourself to get out of your uncomfortable day clothes and into something that didn't make you want to scream. Miguel had seemed so uncomfortable with you being in your pajamas the first time he saw it. You weren't really sure why, bodies are just bodies, right? Maybe because he was such an awkward nerd? He couldn't be attracted to you, could he? Not back then, anyways. He called you "hermosa" now. Seemingly platonically? You really weren't sure. You're not exactly great with social cues, even after years of practice. Plus, you're a disabled woman. What man wants that? Who signs up for a lifetime of their partner never being able to give them what a normal woman can? You weren't even sure if you could have kids with all the unknowns with your health. Not to mention that Miguel and you were from different universes. You were pretty sure he wanted to have kids again. How would that even work? How would any of it work?

Back in the kitchen, Miguel wondered many of the same things you did. How would it work? How could it work? Did you even want him? Your parents were long past too far gone to help you, having disabilities of their own, and no one else around you had even tried to. If he made this awkward, you might feel like you had to part ways with the one person who was caring for you. He didn't want that. Still. You were always so mature. You were friends with people who you had crushed on who had rejected you. Why wouldn't you do the same for him? And he was a genius who invented multiversal travel, who said he couldn't figure out how to make an interdimensional relationship work? In some ways, you two already did. That settled it. He had resolved to tell you.

You changed into an oversized nightgown, with soft seams. You had cleaned up some of the blankets you left out along your way to your room. You knew Miguel hated messes. The blankets were still out from having your niece over a few days ago for a sleepover. You pondered whether you should tell Miguel how you felt, more explicitly than the hints you had been dropping. He was so dense... You hated pursuing, it gave the other person too much power. And you were already permanently stuck in a power imbalance with any and every man you meet. Disability put you at a permanent disadvantage in relationships. You had a very pesky genuine need for a partner. You thought about your family, your brother, your niece, your parents... How would they feel about all this? How could you even tell them about it all?

You entered the kitchen and Miguel turned around to tell you the food was almost ready. His heart stopped. Somehow you looked even more beautiful than usual, wearing the same ratty nightgown that you refused to get rid of, believing that you were doing your part for the environment by wearing it until it was scraps. Something about knowing that he loved you made him love looking at you even more.

"Miguel?" you questioned, seeing the strange look on his face. "You alright there, love?"

"Do you call everyone love?" Miguel blurted it out before he even realized what he was saying. Shock. Shockity shocking shock.

"I mean, only people I care about, but I suppose I call a lot of people love, why do you ask?" you raised an eyebrow, wondering if he was going to lecture you on proper coworker etiquette (as if you two weren't past that point), make some smart mouth comment, or finally address your flirting. The possibility of the last one made your heart nearly stop. Half the reason you flirted was because Miguel would never pick up on it.

"I think I love you"

"What?"

"I mean I know I do. I mean... We've been close friends all this time, and you're the only person I have ever been able to just be open with and... Shock, this is coming out all wrong."

"Migs," you said tenderly, as if you were approaching a wounded animal (which you basically were, he is half spider). "I love you too"

"You do?"

"Well duh, your smart mouth and endless brooding isn't easy to put up with without rose colored glasses." Love did not dull your sharp tongue. Not even a little. Poor Miguel. You were still very annoying. No matter how much he loved you. "Can you handle being a relationship with me, though?"

"What do you mean, cariño?"

"I mean I have a broken brain and body. The stuff you do for me after work will become a full-time job. I am a full-time job. I am so much work... And I haven't been worth it for anyone yet." You hated saying it out loud. You believed Miguel loved you. But you also believed that loving someone didn't mean you could love them well. You had to be sure Miguel knew what he was signing up for, because you loved him. You wanted him to be happy with you. The real you. The 24/7 broken brain and body having you.

Miguel leaned over and kissed you gently on the forehead. Somehow, you knew exactly what the gesture meant. You knew your Miguel. You knew all his buttons, you knew his story, you knew his heart. You knew you had it, in spite of whatever was broken with you. He knew he was signing up for a life of doctor's appointments and medication issues and flare ups and wheelchairs and fighting your insurance company. And he didn't care. He did it all already, and he loved it, because it was for you.

"I can handle you amor" Miguel spoke after what felt like a perfect, peaceful lifetime of just staying close to you after the kiss. "You are so worth it. Worth every single trial that comes our way"

"I'm surprised you told me. I'm surprised you didn't catastrophize the idea of being with me in your head until you were convinced that being within the same universe as you would kill me. Which, to be clear, it won't. Any bad things that happen are just a part of life." You reassured him. You felt a little bad for teasing him at a time like this. But he did catastrophize everything. "What about kids? I always assumed you would want more, now that you don't force yourself to carry the weight of the entire multiverse on your back and stopped blaming yourself for what happened. How would that even work, for us?"

"You want a baby with me already? Dang, looking to live out some of your fan fictions?" Miguel grinned. You glared. He stopped, and spoke "I'm honestly not sure, mi amor. I would need to run some tests, and there's your health to consider... Maybe we would adopt from your universe? We probably don't need to figure it all out now though, mi corazón."

He raised his brows at you and smiled. Just then, the timer went off for the last of the food. He made all your favorites. Whether he consciously knew or not, he was always going to tell you tonight.

"I do have one question though, on that topic. Can you... Are you even able to... Would it hurt you if we..." His voice kept trailing off. Weird. What is he- Oh. OH.

"Yes, I can do that, I'm just more limited in how. I know we're in love and all, but I strongly prefer to wait for that until much farther into the relationship. Like wedding night farther." You were bright red. Miguel had thought about that? With you? You were slightly under the impression, given the way he worked so tirelessly, that this Miguel variant was a sexless being. So much for that theory. You regained your composure a little. "Sorry, I realize that probably isn't what you were hoping I would say."

"Don't apologize, you were just honest. Besides, it's been ages since I..." His voice trailed off again. "I will be completely fine waiting for you. Anyways, we have much more important things to figure out, like how to have a cross dimensional relationship"

"And how to eat all this food you made." You added, salivating at the spread in front of you.

In front of you was elote, some cut up fresh fruit (when did he get that? You really ought to see what he's doing in your kitchen more often...), and, of course, those empanadas. You could kiss him. You should kiss him. He was yours now, wasn't he? As much as you did your best to not oversexualize him and to see him as a person when you were a fan, he still looked like THAT. You had still wanted this for so long. Gosh, you should kiss him.

You leaned over to him as he set down the food, attempting to find the best angle to meet his lips. Why did you have to fall for this damn tree? He was over a foot taller than you. A freaking tree, a very hot tree, very kissable tree, that loved you... What were you mad at again? You finally decided there was only one way to get what you wanted: asking.

"Kiss me?"

You weren't sure how this was all going to work. Probably pretty similarly to how it was now. You weren't sure how you were going to tell your family you were dating a cartoon character. But it would probably be fine. You weren't sure how life with Miguel would end up, what your family would look like. Would your family be the two of you and a cat? A kid? Just you two? In spite of all the unknowns, as he pulled you in for that kiss, you were somehow sure it would be fine.

Let me know if you would like to be tagged in this series!

[datauthorress]

okay but, imagine feral! logan snuggling you at night. especially when its cold outside. you have a habit of getting cold very easily and logan is aware of this, so when you guys are getting ready for bed and you're lying there on your side and you're cold because there's a blizzard roaring outside. logan, hyper aware of whatever you're feeling, presses up against your back and moves his arms around your smaller body. his body is literally like a furnace and the heat that radiates from him is nothing but amazing.

logan nuzzles the back of your neck and you sink back into him, stealing his warmth. he's so warm and you never want to leave his embrace. and when he starts purring? that's even better.

[nosyrobin]

Tiny request for twin reader with damian mabye they were seperated at birth aka talia gave bruce twin reader and kept damian but win reader has some kind of disability like walking with crutches and as soon as damian moves in he goes into protective brother mode and always tries to help twin reader

“I’m your protector.”

Damian Al ghul-Wayne x Disabled! Twinreader

Summary: separated from birth, Damian finds out you are disabled from walking. Knowing that you are his blood sibling, he can’t help but be protective over you

After Talia revealed to Damian he had a twin (brother/sister) that she gave away to his father all because you were disabled. He felt anger towards his mother and a little bit of betrayal.

How could she keep such a secret from him and the fact she just gave you away made him feel…protective.

He wants to know you are okay. He wants to make sure you are okay. So when he moved into his new room, he got a knock on his door. He opens it to see, you. You had crutches, smiling as your hand grip the crutches handle. “Brother! Oh my, we do look the same!” You were excited, happy. Damian immediately observed you, he sees you are pure of light. He was right to feel protective when you don’t know much of the words he is saying with his high vocabulary.

He draws and colors on your crutches, he likes to see the light in your eyes when he draws what you like on your crutches.

You both may be different, but his brotherly love is not. He’s always sitting by you, dinner, breakfast, lunch out of the manor, events, galas. He’s always there. Sure Bruce would try and tell Damian that you can protect yourself, maybe even that you can do things without his help. But you’re ten, just like him. So what did he do? Not listen to his father like he always do.

He’s happy to know you never wanted or tried to be Robin. His heart would break knowing that his precious half would try and fight. But that also meant you never learned how to protect yourself and fight mostly, making it worse for Damian to grasp.

Damian tried not to baby you much, but he couldn’t help but feel anxious at those random thoughts in the back of his head. “They’re gonna fall one day, what if no one is there to pick him up.” He would sometimes just sleep on a chair in your room incase you fall off your bed.

Damian would train Titus for whenever you fall and you can’t reach your crutches. He would have Titus use his body and guide you somewhere so you can get up.

“I’m your protector.” He would say when he sees you trying to get up and grab your crutches. But titus and him are already up and helping you. You laugh thinking he’s joking, but he’s not.

If you’re sick? Protectiveness levels are off the charts when he sees you cough and shake. Yeah he’s not going to school until you’re better. No way he’s leaving his sibling at home!

Would call pennyworth off his phone if you are homeschooled. Always checking up on you no matter what, it doesn’t matter if Alfred says you are okay. He wants to hear you say it.

If someone dared to make fun of you, he’s after them like the devil himself. If they dared to try and take your crutches, it’s gonna get wicked. Even god himself won’t be able to take Damian off the assailant.

Say you were also on the artistic route, he would absolutely treasure your art work. “It’s bad..” you said once, and Damian straight up lectured you about how art takes time and how beautiful your art work is to him no matter what.

I can see Jason saying it’s true the artwork looked terrible, and Damian just straight up chased him around angrily while you try to tell Damian it’s okay.

Titus adores you, and you adore Titus which makes Damian feel even better that Titus likes you. I mean who wouldn’t when literally you are the sunshine of the family.

Damian definitely have written letters to you when he was on “punishment” is what he called it when he had to go work with the titans. So when you visit him at the titans tower, he made sure most things were safe proof for you. Kory already knew you because of Dick. Kory tries to reason to Damian as he literally rips something apart because he deemed it as “unsafe.” But did he listen? No.

When beast boy playfully was play fighting with you, Damian was ready to cut Garfield’s head off. Only for you to wipe the floor of the green shapeshifter by using your crutch as a bat. Damian hid his sword with a smirk, maybe he doesn’t need to protect you much.

[elsecrytt]

curse technique concept:

your technique can make anyone fall in love with you. it's not permanent, but the emotions are extremely real, and powerful, wearing off over time unless refreshed.

the technique is activated by eye contact.

you've also taken a binding vow - you cannot activate your technique at will, it's always on. this makes your technique much stronger than it should be.

so you run around with a blindfold, much like gojo, just to prevent making random people fall in love with you.

it's not so bad, really!

growing up, your parents would wear eyepatches - with only one eye making contact, the technique was half as effective!

except... if the effectiveness of the technique increases proportionally with the number of eyes... well...

[lesservillain]

vi. for you, there'll be no more crying

summary: things change between you and eddie for the better cw: SMUT, unprotected piv, a fight with rick, eddie recounts what happened to him last year a/n: it's happening!!!!

It’s been almost a month since you’ve seen Eddie Munson.

As you lay in bed after a long day of clinicals, your fingertips and toes still cold from the January snow nipping at them in your school uniform. The blizzard that hit at the beginning of the week left several feet of snow all across Indiana, leaving an appropriate setting for the way you’ve been feeling as of late.

Because you should be at the Munson’s today. You should have been at the Munson’s just about every day since the last time you saw them. But, unexpectedly, you’d been told that you wouldn’t be needed anymore, at least for a little while. It wasn’t a reassuring statement in the least. 

You’d took it as maybe just a couple of days, but as February draws closer, you’re starting to feel as if you’d never see your two favorite men ever again.

You didn’t know for sure, but you had a feeling as to why you’d been asked not to come back. It was…embarrassing to think about. You’ve been kicking yourself ever since it happened. 

That night on new years when you and Eddie kissed. Accident or not, it felt like the fireworks outside were going off behind your eyelids. Never have you ever felt so…so…connected to someone just from a kiss. And you were certain by the way Eddie was looking at you that he was feeling it, too.

But, now…Maybe he wasn’t red from enjoyment. Maybe it was from disgust.

You didn’t get much time to dwell on it, though. Because immediately after the phone rang, police chief Hopper calling for Eddie. It scared you to see Eddie’s face drop the way it did. You had a sinking feeling it had to do with Wayne. But when Eddie asked you to take him home right away, it left you confused. 

He wouldn’t tell you anything. Not even budging a little bit. 

“It’s not bout Wayne. He’s fine.” 

That’s the extent of information that you were given.

The next day is when Wayne called, reluctantly telling you that you didn’t need to come out for a while. They were having family issues and Wayne was going to be home to take care of him, so you didn’t have to bother with them.

You tried to argue. Tried to tell them that you would come out just to cook and keep them company if need be, but Wayne was insistent that you don’t make the drive out. At least not until they tell you it’s okay. You finally agreed, but it didn’t feel good. Especially since it didn’t make sense.

Eddie and Wayne made it very clear that they didn’t have any family in town. Eddie might have some grandparents in Tennessee, but they’re on his moms side of the family and they’d not heard from them in years. So what kind of family emergency could it possibly be?

After thinking it through, you’ve come to the conclusion that the phone call from Hopper was unrelated and that Eddie was just using it as an excuse to get rid of you. 

The kiss was clearly too much for him. It had you wondering if there were times where you’d been too unprofessional. Maybe you were supposed to decline their invitations to come over for holidays. They were just being nice asking you to come over, they didn’t actually mean it.

It was even worse when you called on Wayne’s birthday last week. No one answered, so you just left a voicemail, hoping for but not getting a call back. 

And, to top it all off, your clinicals were being held at Hawkins General. Their short staff made the need for help greater than any of the other hospitals around right now, so a lot of the workers there were working past their limits. You’d only just started this week and already felt like you were busting your ass.

The experience you had taking care of Eddie was definitely a help when it came to being more of a help than a hindrance. The patients seemed to really like you, too, which made you feel a little better. Still, you couldn’t help but wish that you were going straight to the Munson’s instead of having to drive all the way home to an empty house after a long day.

Tonya was correct in her suspicions when it came to Charles proposing, so she’d been spending more time with him at his house than at your shared home. It made sense, and you were happy for her. But you still missed having her around to cry on, especially when you were feeling this down.

As you drifted off to sleep, you decided that you were tired of feeling like this. You were going to go to the Munson’s home tomorrow after your clinicals. Even if they turned you away, you wanted to at least apologize for making Eddie feel uncomfortable. You wouldn't be able to go on if you didn’t.

‘If you’re lost, you can look, and you will find mee~” 

You belt Cyndi Lauper as you turn into the entrance of the Munson driveway. You were a little suspicious at the amount of tire tracks that seemed to be going up and down the snowy driveway. Maybe the boys had been coming over to see Eddie?

A sports car you’d not seen before sat in the driveway, taking the spot next to where Wayne normally parks his truck. But it was gone. Wayne wasn’t home, but someone else was here? 

You pulled into Wayne’s spot and threw your car in park. You were getting angrier with each new question you had bubbling up in your head. You walked around to the unfamiliar car, trying to see inside, but it was too dark and the windows were too tinted to see in.

The sound of the front door opening drew your attention, and you almost started yelling then and there when none other than Reefer Rick himself, illuminated by the porch light, stepped off the porch and peered around to see who was there.

“Well hello, nurse,” he called out, putting a cigarette to his lips and lighting it.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” You round the cars, stomping up to him, the sound of snow crunching under your white sneakers.

“Woah, woah, calm down,” he throws his hands up, the smoke billowing from his lips above your head. “I’m just here to hang out with Eddie while Wayne’s workin’--”

“Wayne’s at work?” You can feel tears starting to form. This is exactly what you didn’t want to happen. “Why--,” you sniffle, “Why didn’t he ask me to come out and stay with Eddie?”

“Um, that is because…-Oh! It was, like super, short notice.” He says, nodding unconvincingly. “Yeah, they just really needed him and, uh, he just didn’t think you’d be able to make it out tonight, ya know?”

“Bullshit.”

He looks at you wide eyed, “Wh-what?”

“That’s bullshit, Rick.” You stand your ground, giving him a look that could kill. But he only grew agitated, nostrils flaring as he towered over you.

“Listen, I don’t know what you’re thinking you’re going to get for coming out here, but they don’t need you anymore.”

The words hit you like an arrow to the chest. All of your suspicions were right, but you…you just couldn’t accept it from him.

“I want to hear that from Eddie.”

“Tough luck,” Rick says, taking another drag. 

“I don’t need your permission to talk to him.”

“You do when he said he specifically doesn’t want to talk to you right now.”

The tears fall, but you remain resolute regardless.

“I’m going to talk to him--hey!” You went to walk around him, but he stepped in front of you to prevent you from going any further. You tried it again, and he only moved once more.

“Damn it, just move!”

“I’m not moving,” he says sternly.

“What is this really about, Rick?” He reels back with disbelief. 

“What are you talking about?” He says, sounding exacerbated. “I’m trying to keep my friend safe and you wont take a hint? Is that what you want me to say?”

“Keep him safe? Safe from what?” You match his confused energy.

“From you!”

“ME?!” You’re pushed over your limit at this point. “Don’t even fucking try it, Rick. I’ll call you out for filth.”

“Do it then! I’d love to hear what you could possibly have to say about me!”

“Okay! How about the fact that Eddie used to be your biggest dealer? And that I know you’ve been trying to get him to deal for you again?”

“Wh-what? Are you actually insane?!”

“I’m not the insane one here! The man is in a fucking wheelchair! I know you bring your drugs over here, I’ve seen them in his sock drawer.”

“Yeah, because he smokes it himself! How the fuck do you think he’s been getting by without his pain meds, dumbass!”

Ricks words took you back. You knew Eddie wasn’t taking his pain medication anymore, but you thought he was doing okay without it. You didn’t realize it was because he was using weed to feel better.

“I’ve also not been selling it to him. I’ve just been giving him what I can so that the guy above me doesn’t notice. I actually never needed Eddie to sell for me, I’ve just been trying to help the guy out!”

“Oh, don’t try and get all high and mighty. Eddie may not realize it but I know that you have money. Probably from your mommy and daddy.”

Rick is quiet for a moment, the tips of his ears red under the porch light. You knew you’d got him with how long it took for him to respond.

“Listen,” he finally says, his tone much more serious. “Maybe I do have access to money in one way or another, but I’m not going to flaunt it in front of my friend when I know him and Wayne have struggled to keep the lights on. Eddie’s been like a brother to me since he started pestering me as a freshman, and I’ve done what I can to help them out. Things that only stay between Wayne and I, that Eddie doesn’t even know about, if you catch my drift.”

Your eyes go wide and you nod. The feelings you’ve had towards Rick up to this point should make you not believe him, but something about his shift in demeanor has you wanting to be convinced that he’s telling the truth.

“So if you’re understanding where I’m coming from, I think that you should know what I’m going to ask you to do.”

Your head cocks to the side in genuine confusion.

“No, in fact I don’t know. Please tell me.”

Rick rolls his eyes, taking a step closer so that he can speak to you more hushed.

“C’mon, don’t make me do this. Be the better person and just go.”

“Rick, I honest to god don’t have a clue what the fuck you’re talking about. Speak to me in something other than vague threats please.”

He scoffs, leaning down to be at your level. 

“If I give you a check to leave here and never come back, will that satiate your needs?”

You blink hard, trying your best to comprehend whatever bullshit Rick is going on about.

“Rick,” you say with a sharp exhale, “I don’t know why you think I would ever want any of your money or why you think you could pay me enough to stay away from Eddie. But, I’m going to say this only once. I am not interested.”

Rick straightens up, head rolling back in frustration.

“I can’t believe you. Do you, like, get off on taking things from people who are suffering or something?”

“What the hell are you talking about? I’m not taking anything from anyone!”

“Oh, so you’re meaning to tell me that you’ve just been taking care of Eddie for free this whole time? That Wayne hasn’t been working to keep you around? And now that Eddie doesn’t need you, you’ve come here to try and convince him that he’s still sick so that you can keep getting a check.”

You feel like you’re going insane listening to Rick spout off the made up bullshit that he was spewing at you.

“No! Rick, have you ever even talked to Eddie?! I’ve not taken a single dime from the Munson’s in the last five months that I’ve known them! I was taking care of Eddie through a volunteer program through my school! And when that ended, I agreed to keep taking care of Eddie until he really didn’t need me anymore!”

Rick shakes his head, reeling as he pieces through everything you’ve just told him. It’s quiet for a moment between you two.

“So you’ve really not taken any money from Wayne?”

“No, I have not. Unless you count the times he’s made me food, or bought us all take out. But I don’t ask him to, he always insists.”

His head drops, foot kicking from underneath him.

“Look, I think that we’ve both been…under the wrong impression about each other. I don’t want anything to happen to the Munson’s and I think you don’t want anything to happen to them either.”

“So…we’re on the same page then?” You nod, and Rick laughs. “Well, I’ll be the first to say sorry then. I really thought you were trying to get the little money that they have.”

“And I thought you were trying to get Eddie back into dealing. I’m sorry for thinking that of you.”

“I guess…we’re cool then?”

“I guess so.”

“Cool, well, listen, I know you probably came here to see Eddie. But, I don’t think he would want you to be here right now.”

You frown, unhappy to hear that Rick is still trying to get rid of you.

“I’m sure that he doesn’t, but I really need to talk to him. I just want to clear the air with him and then if he wants nothing to do with me after that…”

“Mmmm, I don’t know what air needs clearing, but Eddie’s being going through some stuff of his own right now. I don’t think its about not wanting to see you…more like he doesn’t want to get you into what he’s got going on.”

You were growing more frustrated with how vague Rick was being. So, instead of wasting more time, you decide to rush past him, heading straight for the front door. But, he didn’t try to stop you. Instead he stood in place, taking a drag of his cigarette as he watches you walk through the front door.

Once inside, you’re greeted by the low hum of music playing from the radio in Eddie’s room, as well as the low murmur of conversation between Eddie and what sounded like Dustin.

Walking down the hall, you stand by the door and peer into the room. Eddie is sitting on the edge of his bed and Dustin is sitting in his chair. They look like they’re looking over a map of some sort and you wonder if it’s one they made for their D and D campaign. 

Your eyes scan over Eddie as he talks. Ever so animated as he points things out, while Dustin, just as animated, retorts something back. He looked a little rougher since the last time you saw him. His hair needed some TLC and the dark circles under his eyes made you wonder if he was getting enough sleep. It pained you to think he was having night terrors without you around to comfort him.

After a moment you decide to knock on the door, causing both boys heads to whip around to face you. Dustin smiles upon seeing you, a kneejerk reaction that he has anytime he’s not seen you for a while. Eddie’s reaction isn’t as sweet, his eyes practically bugging out of his head when he realizes that it’s you in his doorway.

“What are you doing here?” He asks coldly. He didn’t seem at all happy to see you and it hurt.

“I’m here to see you, Eddie.” You take a step inside his room, but Eddie reaches a hand out to stop you.

“You need to leave. Now.” He says in a tone that he’s never spoken with you before. You feel tears starting to well up in your eyes, but you do your best to hold them back.

“No,” you say firmly, “Eddie, we need to talk.”

“I know,” he says with a sigh, hand running through his tangled hair. “I know, but…I promise you that we’ll talk, it just can’t be today.”

“Why not?” You feel that you’re borderline petulant sounding, but you don’t know if you can wait any longer now that he’s here in front of you.

“Tonight…just isn’t a good night.”

The sound of the phone ringing catches you off guard. Dustin jumps up from Eddie’s chair and bolts past you to the kitchen. His weird behavior and Eddie’s resistance have you feeling on edge.

“Is everything okay?” You ask concerned.

“Honestly, not really,” Eddie says exasperated. “That’s why I need you to go. I really can’t risk you being here with what’s going on.”

“Eddie, it sounds like you’ve gotten yourself into something dangerous. Does Rick have something to do with--”

“No, it’s nothing to do with Rick. Well, he’s involved now, but he didn’t have to be. But, you’re right, it is dangerous. That’s why you need to go home. I promise you that if everything goes how it’s supposed to, I will call you tomorrow and we can talk about whatever it is that you want to talk about.”

“Whatever it is that I want to talk about? Eddie, what I want to talk about has been eating me alive for the last month. I’ve been worried sick about you, you know.”

“And I’m so sorry, but I really need one more night to get what is going on taken care of and then I’ll--”

“EDDIE! SHE’S UP! THEY SAID SHE’S UP!”

Eddie moves himself into his chair so quickly that you almost miss it. He starts to roll toward you and you side step out of the way to let him pass. Dustin is standing in the living room and Rick was standing at the entry way chewing on his thumb nail.

“I gotta get over there, like, now,” Dustin says in frustration.

“Absolutely not,” Eddie says, pointing at Dustin.

“I’ll take you,” Rick says, pulling his keys from his pocket.

“Rick, no--”

“Eddie, they need me! Just wait here and keep playing your music! I’ll be fine!”

“Dustin, you know what almost happened to me! There’s no way I’m letting you go and get yourself killed!”

“I’m not going to be killed! We know what we need to do to stop him, and they’re going to need me there to make sure that everything goes smoothly. They’re fighting a boss without any support!

“Then I’m going, too!”

“That’s not gonna happen,” Rick says, waving his hands. “I can’t fit your wheelchair in my trunk anyway. 

“Fucking damn it,” Eddie curses, hands banging against the armrests of his wheelchair. 

“She’s already here, you might as well tell her what’s been going on now,” Dustin says motioning towards you.

“That would really be appreciated!” You say with exhaustion, more confused now than ever.

“Alright, kid, get your shit and let’s go,” Rick says opening the front door. Dustin rushes into the kitchen and grabs a duffel bag with a baseball bat handle sticking out of the zipper.

Just as Dustin is about to run out the door, he stops. Turning to face you, he pauses for a moment.

“Whatever you do, don’t answer the door.”

And with that, he leaves. Only you and Eddie remain.

It’s quiet after you hear Rick take off in his car besides the sound of music still coming from Eddie’s room. The tension in the room could be cut with a knife. Eddie finally takes a deep breath, letting it out before finally speaking.

“Do you still have cassettes in your car?”

The question throws you for a moment, but you nod in response.

“Yeah, I have a few. Why?”

“Go get your favorite one and bring it back in here.”

You didn’t understand why he would ask you to do this, but his serious tone made you take the few steps towards the door. The frigid air hits you once again as you run out to your car. Rummaging through the cassettes you have, you pull out Rumors and run back into the house. 

“What is all of this about, Eddie?” You ask. You walk up to him and the takes the cassette from your hand, smirking when he sees what it is.

“You and Wayne and your tastes in music.” 

It made you happy to see him smile. It’s felt like eons since you’ve last seen it. 

Eddie wordlessly rolls down the hall and you follow behind him. You watch as he pops out the cassette and places it in the case. It’s the one you got him for Christmas. He then replaces it in the player with your Rumors cassette and presses play. Once Second Hand News begins to play, he finally looks at you directly. Your name leaves his lips with a slight shakiness.

“There’s something going on that I really didn’t want you to be involved with. Something that…frankly, I don’t know if you’re even going to believe me when I tell you.”

“Try me,” you say, sitting down on his bed, giving him your full attention.

“Okay, so,” he starts, his hands already fidgeting with the rings on his fingers. “You know how I’ve been telling you bits and pieces about what happened to me last year?” You nod. “Well, I’ve sort of been…well, not really lying. But maybe only telling you half truths.”

Eddie then proceeds to tell you what actually happened to him last year. He tells you about an alternate dimension that exists under ours, that is an almost identical copy of what our world looks like. 

“Well, I’ve really only seen Hawkins, so I can’t say it’s the same everywhere. But, it’s a carbon copy of this town frozen in time.”

“Frozen in time?” You ask.

“Yeah, it’s stuck on the day that Will went missing a few years ago.”

“Will went missing?”

“Back in ‘83. It was this big thing where he went missing, then they found his body, but it wasn’t actually his body. Then he came back and people started calling him Zombie Boy.”

“Okay,” is all you can say as you try and wrap your head around that logic.

“When Will was missing, he was actually in the Upside Down. They were able to get him back, thanks to El.”

“El? Like Jane?” You’d heard the guys call her El before. Eddie nods.

“She has these, like, super powers. Kinda like The Force in Star Wars.”

“So she can lift people with her mind?”

“People, objects, and I guess she has a mind power where she can track people down. I think she used it to help them find Will.”

“How is that even possible?” You feel like Eddie’s barely scratched the surface and you already can barely grasp what he’s told you.

“The government and some experiments that happened a few years ago. They had a lab here in town that was destroyed in the earthquake. Which wasn’t a normal quake, by the way. It was caused by Vecna.”

“Who-na?”

Eddie continues telling you about the events leading up to what happened to him. He fills you in on a monster called the Mind Flayer, about how El lost her powers, then got them back. About how Will is somehow connected to this Upside Down place because of his time there, and how he can sense the presence of it.

“Then…” Eddie stops talking for a moment, looking a bit distraught as he collects his thoughts. “Then…um, one night, last year, there was this girl I went to school with. Her name was Chrissy.”

“Was?” You question. Eddie nods solemnly.

“She, um, asked me to sell her some drugs. I didn’t have on me what she wanted, so I brought her…brought her back to the trailer. It was just me and her, Wayne had already gone to work. I was looking for the drugs she wanted aaaand, uuuh, while I was gone…”

You can see Eddie becoming more uncomfortable as he talks. It breaks your heart to see him like this.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, Eddie,” you tell him, hoping that maybe if he skips whatever happened that it would make him less uneasy.

“No, no,” he says, shaking his head, “I-I haven’t really, um, really gotten to talk about it since it happened. I feel like if I do then…” Eddie takes a moment to compost himself, eyes full of tears when he tilts his head up.

“She, um, she was acting weird. Just, standing there, not responding to me. Then, boom.” Eddie lifts his hand up, mimicking it hitting against something above it. “She’s suddenly on the ceiling. As if something was pulling her up by strings. Then her arms and legs…they snapped in ways that aren’t natural. The sounds,” Eddie puts his hands over his ears and leans forwards, eyes wide on the floor. “Then her eyes just popped into her skull. And her jaw…”

“Eddie, it’s okay,” you say rubbing his back as he starts to sob. You pull him closer to you until his head is resting in your lap. You can feel his tears soaking your thighs, but you only continue to rub soothing circles into his back. 

“You don’t have to tell me anymore, Eddie. I don’t think you’re ready to relive this.”

His head shoots up from your lap, his face wet with tears, eyes rimmed red. He sniffles as he takes his shirt and wipes his face with it.

“It’s fine, I got this,” he says with a rasp. “That was the worst of it. Um, after that, I just totally freaked out and ran. I wasn’t even thinking straight until I pulled up to Rick’s place. That’s when I realized what happened and…what was going to happen to me. I already didn’t have a good reputation in this town, and I knew if I called the cops after I left…shit even if I hadn’t left, they would have arrested me on the spot.”

Eddie tells you about what happened over the few days he was at Rick’s. About how Dustin, Max, Robin, and Steve found him there and they all explained to him what he told you. How if he hadn’t seen it with his own eyes he wouldn’t have believed them.

He then tells you about the manhunt for him. How a group of boys, one of them being Chrissy’s boyfriend, found him and one of those boys ended up being killed the same way Chrissy had. That made three people total that had been killed by Vecna at that point, and apparently he only needed to kill four.

“Who was his fourth victim?” You ask. Eddie blinks and looks up at you.

“Max was supposed to be.”

Eddie tells you everything. He tells you about Max’s visions and her almost being killed in front of Lucas. How El managed to keep her from dying and that’s how she ended up in the coma she’s in now.

It makes you think about how you’d been taking care of her. Did her mom know this is what happened to her? Or was she just as in the dark about it as you and everyone else was. 

You understood why Lucas felt that he couldn’t leave her side. You would probably do the same if you were in his shoes.

“I’m so sorry, Eddie. That must be an awful thing to live with.” You were referring to survivors guilt. You knew Eddie had to have been feeling it this whole time, but you didn’t know the context that made it’s severity make sense.

“I’m trying to deal with it. Honestly…you’ve made me feel a lot better. When Dustin or the guys try to cheer me up, it feels like they’re pitying me. But you…”

You take one of his hands in yours and smile. He looks at you bashfully before adverting his gaze once again. As you hold his hand, you feel the scars that adorn them.

“Eddie,” you say quietly, “What happened to you?”

Eddie remains still, almost tense. There was a long pause before he finally spoke again.

“You know how it’s hard for me to listen to that one Metallica song?”

“The puppet one?”

He nods.

“Yeah, you said it had bad memories.”

“That night, the same night that that happened to Max, we were in the Upside Down. It was Dustin and I, left in charge of creating a distraction so that Steve and Nancy and Robin could get to the big boss. So, I took my guitar from down there and played that song. 

“I’d been practicing it every day since I got the album, so I knew that I needed to play it and make it count. I felt so bad ass playing it, too. And, the best part is that it worked. We were able to get all those fucking bats to come to us.”

Eddie was looking past you, recalling that night in his head.

“They swarmed us. Dustin and I were able to get back into the trailer where we thought we were safe. But, those fucks were still able to get in. We took them down, and Dustin wanted to leave…But I was too stubborn.

“Instead of doing the right thing and going with Dustin, I tried to play the hero and wanted to make more of a distraction for the others. So I…ran out there and I tried to fight off hundreds of these bats by myself.”

You gasp, your hand coming to your mouth as you connect the dots.

“Needless to say they made a snack out of me,” Eddie says gesturing to himself. “I was sure I was a gonner, too. I blacked out and everything. Woke up a few days later in a busy hospital where I didn’t receive the best care in the world. But, I was also handcuffed to the bed considering I was still the number one suspect in the murders.”

“Wait, so even though you came in barely alive they still thought you were a murderer?”

“Yep. And, get this, Jason, Chrissy’s boyfriend, he died in the earthquake. His aunt works at the hospital as a nurse. She obviously doesn’t like me, and I don’t blame her. She tried to kill me.”

“What?! How?”

“Apparently she was going to give me like a lethal amount of some kind of narcotic in my IV. But Wayne caught her at the last minute when he came to visit me.”

“And that’s why you were so weary of me.”

Eddie nods, giving you a coy smile. “Sorry about that…”

“Eddie you don’t need to be sorry about any of that. If I had known, I would have done things totally differently--”

“But I’m glad you didn’t. Instead of treating me like a charity case, you treated me like human being despite my shitty attitude. Who knows if we would have gotten to this point if you had known.”

This point. That could mean a myriad of things, but you try not to think about why you came here and instead focus back to the present. 

“Wow. That is…a lot.”

“Yeah,” Eddie nods, “I know that most of it sounds like some kind of fantasy, and I don’t blame you if you don’t believe me.”

“Why would you lie to me?”

Eddie looks at you with surprise.

“You don’t think I’m crazy?”

“Eddie, obviously you’re quite upset about all of this. I don’t think you’re that good of an actor to fake it.”

“You have no idea how happy that makes me,” he says with a sigh of relief. “I thought you would have told me to shut up before I could get everything out.”

“You really think that way about me?”

“No, god no,” he says waving his hands, taking yours back in his grip once he’s done, “I just wouldn’t have blamed you if you did.”

“So, I’m guessing that the radio silence from you the last few weeks is because something is happening again?”

“Yes. Do you remember when we were at Grant’s place on New Years?”

Your cheeks go hot and you nod.

“Well, when Hopper called, he told me that something happened to Max that night. Apparently she levitated off of the bed and told Lucas that Vecna would be coming soon.”

You reel back, taken aback at the visual you had in your head of that happening. “No one at the hospital said anything about that.”

“That's because only Lucas and Max’s mom saw it happen. Nearly gave the poor woman a heart attack.”

“I bet it did,” you say thinking about Max’s poor, tired mom.

“Ever since we’ve all been on high alert in case something else happens. But nothing with Max has happened.”

“Has anything happened to you?”

There’s a quiet moment again. Eddie’s thumb rubs circles into the back of your hand as he takes his time to respond.

“I’ve been…having those dreams. But they’ve been more vivid than before. He…he talks to me.”

“Who talks to you?”

“Vecna.”

“The bad guy from the Upside Down has been talking to you?”

Eddie nods. “He told me that I was lucky to get out alive, that he was going to make sure that didn’t happen again.”

A wave of nausea washed over you. Eddie was in real, genuine danger and there’s a possibility that you might not have ever seen him again if you hadn’t come out tonight. How could you even live with yourself if that had been the case?

“Well,” you say after a moment, “That’s not going to happen. Not while I’m around.”

Eddie shakes his head in disbelief. “I just told you I have a target on my back and your first thought isn’t to run?”

“Hell no! I’m not leaving your side ever again at this point.”

Eddie brings a hand to his face, head tilting back. He plays it off as frustration but he’s trying to hide how red his cheeks are from your words. But when he says your name in a whiny tone to punctuate his actual frustration, you suspect he’s going to protest you staying.

“Please don’t make me leave,” you say before he can get another word out. He peeks at you through his fingers, a sad puppy like look on your face as you plead with him. “If I have to be honest with you to get you to let me stay I will be.”

“What do you mean by that?” He says, running his hand down his face so he can look at you properly.

You take a deep breath in and release it.

“Eddie, what I’ve been wanting to talk about…I just, I can’t keep my mind off of you. And, not just in the way I’ve been worried about you…” You bite your lip. “Ever since New Years…when we..you know.”

“When we…”

“Kissed.” 

Eddie really blushes now, and you become acutely aware of how your hand is still holding his.

“Ye-yeah, I’ve been…wanting to talk with you about that, too.”

“I want to apologize.”

Sitting up straight, he looks at you like you have two heads. “What do you need to apologize for?”

“That kiss, it was inappropriate. At first it felt like it was just an accident, but the more I’ve been able to think about it the last few weeks…The more I realized that I didn’t want it to be one. And that made me think that you must have felt that way, too. Which was why I thought you stopped having me come over.”

“No, nope, not at all,” Eddie says, waving his hand dismissively. “Honestly, I’ve barely been able to think about that. Not because I don’t want to, but, well, you know, with everything going on.”

“Well, that makes me feel better, kinda. Obviously I’d rather you be mad at me than in danger from a supernatural being, but I’m glad you’re not upset with me at all.”

“I don’t think I could ever be mad at you.” The gooey tone he says those words make you feel like melting into a little puddle on the floor. “I also wouldn’t take back what happened. Because I don’t regret it. Unless you didn’t want it to happen. Then I’ll do my best to forget.”

“You really don’t regret it?”

Eddie shakes his head. “If nothing else, I think that if I died right now that I’d be happy to have had at least that with you.”

You feel your heart beating in your chest. Eddie and you look at each other, the tension thick as both of your true feelings start to surface for the first time like this. You swallow thickly, and Eddie’s eyes shift down. They land on your lips, then back to your eyes. 

The string snaps, and you both lean into each other, lips colliding together is a passionate kiss. His hands hold your face in place, yours go straight for his hair, letting your fingers get caught up in his tangled mane. Your lips move in sync as you take each others breath away. 

The fireworks from New Years make an appearance in your minds eye once more. But this time, they’re raging more than ever, amplified by the warmth that floods your body as you have this moment with Eddie. All the worries you had fly out the window as he hold you, kissing you with just as much feverence as you have for him.

The moment you pull away from each other feels like being ripped away from a fire in the dead of winter. But Eddie’s face remains close to yours looking at you wildly, a huge grin on display.

“Wow,” he says with a breathy chuckle. 

“Yeah,” you say, eyes still closed as you feel a heat starting to burn within you. They remain lidded even with you open them, taking in Eddie’s features up close as he looks at you with a childish wonder.

You can’t help but lean into him again. Letting your lips barely touch as you peck him once, twice. The third time lingers, and you feel the heat of his breath blowing from his nose against your cheeks. You open him up with your mouth, letting yourself into his as your tongue slips inside. There’s some hesitance on his part, but he does his best to match your pace, tongues doing a sloppy dance between you. 

As the kiss intensifies, you place your hands on Eddie’s shoulders, pushing him back gently until you’re barely on the bed anymore. You close it with another peck or two, his eyes closed as he chases you. You slide down until your knees hit the push of his carpet and that’s when Eddie opens his eyes. He watches your every move as you place a delicate hand on either knee, pushing his thighs apart until you’re properly wedged between them.

“Wh-what are you…?” Eddie trails of, still wanting to make sure you’re doing what he thinks you’re doing. Your hands move slowly as they run up his thighs until they reach his hips, then you move them back down at the same pace.

“What do you want me to do, Eddie?” You ask, voice smooth as silk as you look up at him. 

“Holy fuck,” Eddie huffs, voice shaky. You lay your head on his thigh, looking up at him, and Eddie swears you have a sparkle in your eyes.

“I can do whatever you want me to, you know,” you say with a smile. “If there’s a possibility you might die, might as well make it a night to remember.”

Eddie doesn’t say anything, and it makes you a little nervous. But he couldn’t help it. He was going through every scenario that he’d ever jerked off to with you in it. He was getting so hard that he didn’t know how he was going to be able to keep his cool.

But his silence worried you. Did you come off too strong? 

“Eddie? Do you want me to stop?”

Eddie suddenly snaps back into it, shaking his head wildly. 

“No, please don’t!” He absentmindedly grabs your hand and places it on his hard cock. You gasp, feeling him through his sleep pants. 

“This is what you do to me, you know. And not just now. There’s been so many times where I’ve imagined this happening. But, I gotta say, nothing I’ve imagined has come close to the real thing.”

You eat up his words and they go straight to your core.

“You’ve thought about me?” You ask genuinely.

“I can’t think of anything else but you,” he says lowly. Too bashfully for the mood you’re trying to set. You want him to know he can be open with you, that he doesn’t have to think he isn’t worthy of you.

You adjust your hand so that you’re holding onto his cock and start rubbing him through his pants. Eddie makes little noises in response to your touch that tell you he’s liking it. 

“Can I--” You start, but Eddie cuts you off.

“You can do whatever you want,” He says breathily.

“I don’t want to do anything you don’t like though,” you say, looking up at him through your lashes.

“As long as it’s you I’ll like it.”

With that, you let your fingers curl around the hem of his sweats and tug. Eddie lifts himself up a bit so give some slack and you take advantage of it. You pull his sweats down enough that his cock springs free, smacking against his stomach.

You’ve seen his cock briefly before, but to see it now in all it’s glory was a lot. It was as big as you expected it to be, and thick, too. You reached out your hand, wrapping it around him and begin stroking him. His cock jumps in your touch.

Eddies hands are gripping his wheelchair. He can’t believe this is happening to him. He’s never had anyone touch him like this before and the fact that you’re the first to do this was driving him crazy. Every move felt better than he could have even imagined. 

He watched in awe as you adjusted yourself, your lips hovering over him as you fucking spit on his cock and rub it in. He feels like he could bust right there, but he does his best to keep calm. The last thing he wants is to embarrass himself by cumming too fast.

But you’re testing his resilience when you take him into your mouth.

“Oh, holy fuck,” he moans as you get as much of him in as you can. With your hand on the base you start bobbing up and down on him, doing your best to open up for him as you take him to the back of your throat over and over. 

Eddie’s hands fly to your head. You hesitate for a moment, but when you see up to see the way he’s looking at you, you keep going. Pulling yourself from him, you take your tongue and lick him from base to top, swirling it around his head before going back in for the kill. You open up your throat and take him until your can feel your nose rubbing against hair.

“Haaaaa, oh my god,” he chokes out, his grip on your head getting tighter out of reflex. You hold it for as long as you can, trying your best to hold your breath until you just can’t anymore. You pull off of him again, looking up at him to get his reaction. 

“Was that good?” You ask as you stroke him.

“Is the sky blue?” He can’t even believe you’re asking. You smile and lean down to wrap your lips around his tip. You work around it with your tongue as you keep pumping. Eddie grabs the arms of his chair again and his hips buck, putting him further into your mouth. You cough a bit, unprepared for that much of him all at once.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” he says, his hands framing your face. “Are you okay?”

You smile and nod, “Yeah, it’s okay. You’re just so big, Eddie. I can’t take you like that if I’m not ready.”

Eddie’s face is like a tomato from your words. You calling saying he’s big does a little something to his ego that he’s going to keep in his mind for the rest of his life. He leans down and kisses you, taking the lead with his new found confidence. You can feel him guiding you up from the floor with his hands, and you stand until you’re the one leaning down to him.

Eddie suddenly pulls away, locking the brakes of his chair. He places a hand on either arm and pushes himself up so that he’s towering over you, your bodies brushing against each other as he teeters on his leg. Out of instinct you grab him by his waist to hold him up. 

But Eddie has other plans. He maneuvers his body, shifting his weight so that he’s pushing against you. This causes you to fall back until you land on the bed, bringing Eddie down with you. Before he can crush you under him, Eddie braces his hands on either side of you, propping himself up so that he’s hovering over you, his knee on the bed between your legs.

Now you’re the one blushing, taken aback by such a smooth move by him. He’s so close to you, his hair curtaining around you so that all you can focus on is his face. Which is looking at you like he also can’t believe that he just pulled that off. 

“Hi,” you say when he doesn’t say anything.

“Hi, sweetheart” he says with a classic Eddie chuckle.

You reach up to kiss him again and he melts into it, allowing some of his body to relax into you. It doesn’t take long for things to heat up again, but Eddie doesn’t seem like he’s able to make another move while holding himself up. So you take the opportunity to reach between you and grab him again.

Eddie breaks away and curses, looking at you with a lust filled gaze. 

“Can I touch you?” He asks, taking you by surprise.

“Of course,” you say, tickled at the prospect. 

Eddie shifts onto his side, and the two of you adjust until you’re laying next to each other. He looks at you up and down and raises his hand. But he freezes before he does anything.

“Wh-where should I touch?” He asks you. You think he’s joking at first but you realize very quickly that he’s not.

“Eddie…have you ever done this before?”

His hand drops, eyes looking away from you in embarrassment. 

“Oh, Eddie,” you coo, brushing his hair out of his face. “It’s okay if you haven’t. I just didn’t know.” He looks at you out of the corner of his eye and smiles. It’s still embarrassing, but he should have known you wouldn’t judge him. “Do you want me to show you?”

Eddie’s ears perk up.

“Please?”

You take his hand and guide him to the bottom of your shirt. Gently, you move his hand until it’s under the fabric. The tips of his fingers skim your skin as you raise his hand higher, higher, until it’s touching the cup of your bra. You leave it there and move your shirt up the rest of the way so that your chest is on display.

His eyes are bugging out of his head. Eddie’s seen boobs before. He’d say he’s a pretty big fan of them. But he’s never seen them this up close and personal before. He snaps back to reality when he hears you giggling.

As Eddie ogles your chest, you arch your back and reach around to unclasp your bra. If he’s this amazed covered up, you can only imagine how he’s going to react once he sees the whole picture. Once it’s loose, you pick up Eddie’s hand and remove it, tossing it to the other side of the bed. 

“Woah,” he says in awe, eyes blinking rapidly. Your cheeks hurt from how hard you’re smiling at him.

Bringing his hand back down, you place it on your breast, giving him a small squeeze to let him know he can do as he wants. Eddie gets the hint and immediately begins playing with you in his hand. He needs at you, feeling you in palms and with his fingers. He lets yous nipple get caught between two of them and gives a gentle pinch that has you gasping.

“Did that feel good?” He questions, and you nod in response. He likes this answer and tries to do it more, experimenting a bit with pressures and feeling them more. Most of it felt good. Honestly you were more turned on by his fascination than anything. Most guys barely pay attention to your body during sex, but Eddie’s inexperience seemed to be benefiting you.

It’s when Eddie takes it to the next step that you start to feel genuinely turned on. 

He moves, letting himself get closer to you until his face is right at your breast. He looks up at you with those big brown eyes, pupils blown out so that they’re almost block, and takes your nipple into his mouth. You can feel the sensation all the way down to your toes as he sucks and licks you. Eddie’s shifts himself so that he can fondle your other breast while he continues working on you.

It becomes too much and not enough all at once and you desperately just want Eddie to touch you in other places. So you take his hand once again, gentle around his scars, and bring it down to the waistband of your jeans. Eddie looks at you, tit still in his mouth, waiting to see what you do next. So you unbutton your pants and wiggle them down as best as you can. Eddie’s head whips around to watch, suddenly very interested in what you’ve got going on.

When you’ve gotten them off, your panties on full display for him, Eddie feels like he’s won the lottery. The reality of everything suddenly sets in that this is actually happening and he’s pretty sure he’s never been so hard in his life. He lets you move his hand down, over the fabric until his hand is where your legs meet. They feel damp to the touch, and Eddie can barely compute that you’re wet. Because of him.

“Do you want me to show you?”

Eddie smacks his lips, still staring at where his hand is touching you. He’s watched porn before, so he thinks he can figure it out. His hand moves from yours and he runs two fingers down your clothed slit, getting a feel of you before he does anything else. 

He’s trying to keep himself aware of any movements you make as he continues to feel you. He knows there’s a sweet spot hiding somewhere, he just needs to find it. After a minute he gets frustrated decides to take the plunge. He pulls your panties to the side and repeats what he was doing before.

The sudden gasp you make when he brushes over a certain spot has him celebrating internally. He focuses on what he’s pretty sure is your clit, making small circles with the pads of his fingers. The reaction you give him has him elated, your smalls huffs and moans making him feel like the king of the world. And he did it all by himself!

You were shocked that Eddie was able to make you feel so good so quickly. It was hard to believe he’s never done it before, but you couldn’t think about that as he tended to you. Eddie was so zoned in to what he was doing, and you found it so endearing, but you wanted more. 

Bringing yourself forward, you took his face in your hand and turned it, planting a kiss on his lips. He only faltered for a moment, taken by surprise by you, but quickly returned to your needs. 

“Eddie,” you breathed against his lips, “feels so good. Need more.”

Oh shit, is this it?

Eddie thought quickly about how he was going to do this. He didn’t know if he would be able to hold himself up on his bad leg. But he would try for you if it’s what he needed to do. He pulled his hand from between your legs and shifted up until he was on one knee, only using his thigh to keep himself balanced. 

When his shirt was pulled from over his head, and you couldn’t help but stare. Eddie had started doing some exercises recently to rebuild his strength, push ups, lifting small weights, and it was starting to pay off. And the little trail of hair from his cock to his belly button had you drooling. 

Eddie caught you staring and smiled down at you.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

“Maybe next time,” you tease back, and Eddie almost jumps with joy. You hadn’t even done the deed yet and you were already talking about a next time? Maybe Vecna had gotten him in his sleep and this is what his heaven is. He wouldn’t complain if it was.

Eddie does some moving, and you help by opening your legs up for him. He looks at your exposed pussy and just about passes out from the sight. No porn star could compare to the sight of you laying before him, in full view for him to take in.

“Take a picture,” you say, laughing at the trance he seems to be in.

“Sorry,” he blushes. He grabs the sides of your panties and pulls them down until they’re just another piece of clothing on his floor. 

He takes a note from a porno he’s watched and runs his fingers through your folds, collecting your wetness before bringing his hand to his cock and pumping it. The sight of it has you feeling hotter than before, a lump forming in your stomach from the little bit he’s touched you already.

Eddie looks like he’s about to take the dive when you stop him.

“Eddie, do you have any condoms?”

Eddie’s eyes go wide, a wave of devastation washing over him.

“I did…but they got destroyed when the trailer did,” he said, as if he didn’t know those condoms wouldn’t have done any good even if he did have them.

“Oh, um, that’s okay,” you say. “Just make sure you pull out. Okay?”

Eddie salutes you, “Scouts honor.”

“Didn’t take you for a scout,” you say jokingly. Eddie simply shrugs and strokes himself a few more times.

Eddie does his best to situate himself, leaning over you with one hand and one leg, using his thigh for support. Before you know it he’s lining himself up at your entrance. The anticipation is palpable as the head of his cock just a thrust away from being inside of you.

Taking a breath, Eddie looks at you.

“You sure you want to do this?” 

You can’t help but laugh at the position you’re in for him to ask you that.

“Yes, Eddie, I promise.”

He chuckles, “Okay, well, here goes nothing. Let me know if I do something wrong.”

“Just don’t go in all at once,” you tell him. “Go slow, please.” Eddie aches at how sweet you sound pleading with him.

He takes another breath and goes for it. He pushes himself past the threshold until the tip was all the way in before pulling back out again. He does this a few times, inching in a little more with each thrust until he’s halfway in and already feeling like he’s going to cum.

The stretch is delicious. You didn’t mean for him to go this slow, but you don’t want to discourage him so you let him go at his own pace.

By the time Eddie is almost all the way in his fists are already gripping his bedsheets. It’s indescribable how amazing you feel around him, and it feels like a tidal wave of emotions is on the horizon. But Eddie is determined not to make things weird by crying right now, so instead he looks at you, trying to gauge how you’re feeling about all of this.

Wrong move.

Because the slack jawed, lidded eyed expression you were giving him only made things worse. And then you go and smile at him! Come on!

“You can go faster now,” you say to him after a few slow thrusts. Eddie nods and starts moving a little more, doing his best to get a good rhythm with only one leg. But you take your leg and position it around his thigh, giving him a little more stability which he greatly appreciates.

At his new pace each thrust felt heaven. The way he hits that spot so effortlessly due to his size has your eyes rolling to the back of your head. The room is filled with moans, curses, and Eddie’s name here and there.

He leans in closer to you, his face buried in the crook of your neck. He’s breathing heavy into your ear, little gasps and hisses coming from him as he continues to roll his hips into you.

After a few minutes of bliss, you start to feel a wobbling on either side of you. Eddie’s arms look like they’re about to give out at any second. You thought about it for a moment until an idea popped into your head.

“Eddie,” you huff, getting his attention. He stops, looking at you with a slightly scared expression.

“Y-yeah?”

“Do you trust me?”

He nods, and you take your legs and wrap them around him. With one swift movement, you roll your bodies until you’re sitting on top of him in the bed. The new angle is intense with him sitting so snug inside of you. 

The look on Eddie’s face is pure surprise, eyes wide with shock.

“This okay for you?” You ask, and he nods once more. “Good.”

You lean forward, letting your hand run up his stomach to his chest. Then you start to move, going up and down slowly a few times before giving one thrust that had him cursing under his breath. After getting the reaction you want you start to bounce on him, giving him quite the show as you do. You bring his hands to your chest once more to let him feel you up as you milk him for all he’s worth.

“You feel so good, Eddie,” you say to him. Eddie looks at you like you hung the moon.

“Y-yeah?” He stutters.

“So good,” you reassure him.

“Oh god, don’t talk like that,” he says, covering his face with his hands.

“Why not?” you ask, switching from bouncing to rolling your hips as you lay chest to chest with him.

“Jesus christ. Because if you talk like that then I’m gonna come, and I don’t wanna come yet.”

“You can come, Eddie. I want you to,” you say in a sweet tone.

“But you haven’t yet,” he whines. It touches you that he’s worried about making you cum.

“It’s okay if I don’t. This is for you, not me,” you say, caressing his face. But he shakes his head.

“No, want to make you come, too. Don’t wanna be like those assholes who don’t make girls cum.”

“Awe, Eddie, that fact that you even care means you’re not like that. But…” You take his hand, bringing his thumb to your clit. “If you really want to make me come, do what you were doing before.”

“Yes ma’am,” he says, getting started. The combination was delicious as you started to roll your hips again. 

It didn’t take long for you to feel like you were on the edge with Eddie’s help. The knot was forming in your stomach once again and you chased that high by grinding down on him, letting his cock hit you right in that sweet spot over and over.

“Oh, fuck, I’m so close,” you say, moving on instinct with what feels good. 

Eddie felt like he had front row seats to the best show of his life as he watched you start to come undone on top of him. That deep pit feeling that he’s been trying to ignore was becoming too much for him to stave off for much longer. He was doing his best to try and hold it in because he really wanted to watch you cum on his cock. But every movement you made chipped away at him.

“Shit, oh my god,” you say just before you hit your peak. One more good roll of your hips and the knot inside you snaps. The feeling is intense, and you vision goes blurry as you come hard.

Eddie is losing his mind watching you. The way your pussy is spasming around him is too much for him to handle and he’s suddenly cumming as well.

“Oh, fuck!” He shouts, holding onto your hips as he spills inside of you.

It takes a moment for the both of you to come down and realize what happened. You hop off of him quickly, almost falling off the bed with how shaky your legs were. 

“Shit, shit, shit,” you say, jogging into the bathroom to take care of the mess Eddie made.

“I’m so sorry,” he calls to you from the bed. “I-I didn’t mean to!”

Eddie was panicking. He knew he fucked up and there was no way you were going to do this with him ever again now. You might never even speak to him again after what he did.

“Eddie, it’s fine,” you say from the bathroom. “I’ll just clean up really quick and we should be okay. I think my period is due soon anyway.”

He wasn’t really sure what that meant, but the fact you weren’t yelling it him was enough to help him calm down at least a little bit. He sat up fully in the bed and looked down at himself. The lower half of his body where you were was soaking wet, evidence of what the two of you had just done. It hits him like a freight train that you had sex with him. And he made you come? He felt like he was on top of the world.

After cleaning yourself up, you sheepishly reentered Eddie’s bedroom. You had just had sex with him, but you were feeling a little bashful about being naked in front of him. But the way he was looking at you made you feel like you could be covered in mud and he’d still be happy to see you.

“Do you want to take a shower?”

“..and she picked out the venue,” you say as you brush out Eddie’s hair. “I think she wants to do like a mint green and a light orange. Maybe some white or silver or something like that, too.”

“I’m assuming you’re going to be the maiden of honor or whatever it’s called?” Eddie asks, looking at you in the bathroom mirror.

“No, her sister is, but I’m going to be a bridesmaid. I hope she has us wear green dresses instead of orange.”

“I think you would look really pretty in orange.”

You blush, sneaking a peak at him in the mirror. He’s had a grin plastered on his face since you two got in the shower. Even now he’s looking at you like you’re the most beautiful painting in a museum.

“Thanks,” you say softly, finishing the last few knots in his hair. “There, good as new.”

“Hell, yeah,” he says, looking at himself in the mirror, “It fees way better already. I don’t know how I thought I was going to be able to manage this long without you.”

“I guess that means you can’t get rid of me, huh?” You say, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. 

“Good thing I didn’t plan on it.”

Warmth flooded your whole body at his words. It felt so good to get your feelings off your chest with him. Of course Tonya was right that he liked you. When he told you that he’d been pining for you for a while, you felt like kicking yourself for never seeing the signs.

You bend down to press a kiss to the crown of his head. His smile grew even wider as you did, the apples of his cheek dusted with a hint of pink. He couldn’t believe that this was even happening to him. How did he manage to get the most perfect girl in the world to like him? Certainly wasn’t his looks, nor his personality. Maybe you were just crazy and taking a chance on him. Whatever your reason, he doesn’t plan on doing anything to mess it up.

“Do you think Dustin and the gang are okay?” You ask suddenly, pulling him from his thoughts.

“Shit, I almost forgot,” Eddie says, suddenly anxious again. “The phone didn’t ring while we were…you know.”

“Not that I heard. Is that a bad thing?”

“Not necessarily,” he says, turning his chair to look at you, “But I was hoping that one of them would call once things are settled down.”

“Can I ask you something?” You say after a beat.

“Of course.”

“Why did Dustin say not to answer the door?”

“Vecna, he’s…doing this weird thing with them. Apparently Nancy slipped into a trance and went to answer the door to their house and it ended up being a trap. She had some scary visions I guess and now she’s petrified to open a door. Jonathan’s been staying with her so she’s not alone.”

“That’s Mike’s sister, right? Has Mike had any visions?”

“Not Mike, but I guess Lucas has been seeing things, too. So we’re just trying to be cautious.”

“What does Wayne think about all of this?”

Eddie chuckles, shifting in his chair. 

“He’s always been a believer in the supernatural, so it didn’t take much to convince him of whats been going on. It’s the only reason he hasn’t asked you to come out here instead of Rick. Which, he’s not been doing too bad taking care of me, so don’t be too hard on him.”

“I think Rick and I are cool now,” you say with a smile.

“Well, that’s good to hear,” Eddie starts, “Because I actually needed to ask you something.”

“What’s up?” You ask curiously.

“So, I was going to ask you to go with me as my plus one, just in case I needed help But now…I guess I want to ask you if you wanted to go with me to Rick’s wedding. Not just as my plus one, but as my…”

“As your what?” You ask with a teasing lit.

“As my date,” he says, eyes cast down so he doesn’t have to watch you if you reject him.

“Awe, are you asking me on a date?” You ask.

“Maybeeee…”

“Eddie, of course I’ll go. I’d have gone no matter what, but I’ll especially go as your date.” You reach your hand out for him to take. He looks at it, then up at you before taking your hand in his. He brings is to his lips and places little kisses on your knuckles.

“Are you sure? You don’t have to say yes because of what we did.”

“Eddie, I told you I like you. I’m sure it must be had to think that considering how down on yourself you are, but I really, really do like you. Want to date you, if you want to.”

“So, if everything goes well tonight…maybe we can, like, go see a movie or something?”

“I would love to. We can go to the one close to my house. Oh, maybe we can even double date with Tonya and Charles. She’s been dying to meet you.”

“She has?” He asks, surprised to hear that anyone wants to meet him.

“Yes. She’s the one whose been trying to tell me that you like me for months now.”

The two of you laugh and carry on, eventually heading out to the living room. The two of you get comfortable on the couch after deciding on a movie to watch and popping it into the VHS player. Everything is going well, the two of you stealing little kisses here and there, until about 20 minutes into the movie.

The both of you jump when you hear it. It feels like your heart is beating a million beats per second. You almost think that you imagined it, until you looked over at Eddie, who seemed just as distressed as you.

And then it happens again. 

Another knock at the door.

thanks for reading!

[1-ker0sene-1]

Your blog is like a buffet, thank you 🥺 I would like to maybe put in a wee little request of poly 141 with a reader that has arthritis with pain flare ups maybe, I'm kinda going through it rn with a bad flare

{Thank you for your lovely words and great request! I'm sorry about your flare, I hope it goes down soon!♥️ Take care of yourself pookie♥️ paraffin wax has helped some friends of mine :)}

John notices your flare first. The way you try to breathe through your pain and continue your tasks, eyes close and shudder for a second. His eyes soften and a frown etches on his face. Oh sweet thing, you've done enough. He just wants you to rest. He'll move closer to your side, a hand sliding warmly up your back before holding the nape of your neck. Authoritative, yet in a gentle manner.

"Darlin'?.. you doin' alright?"

He asks, he knows you're not. But whether you tell him you are or not gives him an inside to exactly how much pain you're in.

However no matter how you answer, he's sending you to go rest. Kissing your temple.

"Hm? How about you watch a movie with our boys? I'll take care of dinner.."

His arms wind around your waist, pulling your back into his chest. Kissing on your shoulder. He didn't want you to feel bad for needing a break. Besides the boys waiting on the couch would be more than willing to look after you.

"John you really don't have to worry about it-"

You can hear the creak in his knees as he bends to lift you up. An arm under your knees, and another behind your back. Kissing your cheek, his beard tickling your soft skin.

"We're home now. We can take care of you."

He mumbles. Glancing over as Kyle walks into the kitchen. Tilting his head at the scene.

"Something happen?"

He asks in a bit of alarm, raising his brows. John shakes his head coming over to stand in front of the younger man, holding you up between them. Mindlessly you reach up, skimming your fingers over Kyle's jaw. Who takes your hand gently and kisses your fingertips.

"I'm alright really-"

John sighs at your dismissal. Leaning to kiss Kyle's head just above the brow, explaining to him.

"Flare up.. darlin' will be up in no time. Just needs some rest and care is all."

Kyle hums in acknowledgement, taking you into his own arms. You groan at their dramatics, dolling you around like you can't move at all. But smile as Kyle peppers your cheek in kisses.

"Let's get you to the couch lovie.. I'm sure Johnny will be all too eager to give ya a massage while I get you an ice pack yeah?"

You sigh softly, leaning into his chest as he carries you into the living room. Despite your groaning earlier, it was nice to simply rest. Get the weight off your aching and stiff joints.

"Thank you sweetheart.."

You mumble into him, a smile spreading on his lips.

"Just loving you sweets, nothing any of us wouldn't wanna do."

Coming into the living room around to the couch, Simon sits up stiffly seeing you carried like that. Nearly throwing Johnny off on accident, earning a yelp from the scottsman. Seeing that look of pain threw the blonde man off.

"She alright?"

The question Simon asks makes Johnny blink and sit up as well. Kyle waves them off, slotting you carefully between the two men.

"Flare up."

Is the only words he needs to say. Before both Johnny and Simon envelop you in their arms.

"They're being dramatic- I'm not dying y'know-"

You giggle. Simon chuckles, an arm around Johnny's hips as you lay between them on his chest. Johnny laying almost on you, quite the effective soldier sandwich. Johnny kisses your collarbone. Leaning into the dramatics to cheer you up.

"Our wee lass. How are we ever gettin' by without you?"

He practically purrs. His hands warmly brush over you, serious for a couple seconds.

"Where does it hurt bonnie..?"

As you tell him, he caresses, massages, and feels over each area that you mention to him. Watching you with loving bright eyes. Occasionally leaning down to notch your lips together, swallowing up your groans of comfort. Simon licks his lips watching the both of you, gripping Johnny's mowhawk to pull him back a bit. Kissing him first, sloppy and rough.

You watch the two of them. Pressing a kiss to Johnny's throat from below him, your fingertips skim over Simons arm. When Si disconnects the kiss he leans down to kiss you next, gentle and soft. Moving slow and sweet with you. Now Johnny is watching with a lovestruck grin. Hands still kneading and massaging your aching joints.

Doesn't take long before Kyle walks back in with a couple of ice packs, kissing Simons cheek- which has the blonde pulling back. Just so Kyle can get the next kiss, cheekily pressing his tongue in to run over your mouth. You laugh and pull back when he's had his fun.

"Got your ice baby."

He hums, Simon takes the packs, resting them where Johnny is done massaging.

"Twenty minutes on and off!"

You can all hear John say sternly from the kitchen. Kyle smirks and nudges your shoulder.

"I'll go help the old man with dinner."

He says. You reach out before he can leave, bringing him into some drowning kisses from all three of you on the couch. Kyle finally slips away after a couple minutes of chasing eachothers mouths. Wiping his lips with a dazed smile as he heads back to the kitchen.

Johnny's cheek is on your chest now, cradling the back of his head close to you. Simon is kneading at your hips. Whispering into your hair.

".. We'll get you in a hot bath.. yeah doll? Warm you up.."

His Manchester accent purring in your ear.

"You won't have to move an inch. You take care of everything while we're deployed. Gotta do the same for our girl.."