#i feel like i may be more or less equipped to start working on a more serious project nyaow though?

[hiyari8]

quickish practice covar featuring lily the animove from vocaloid

[anothermonikan]

i have come to the conclusion that I'm not even lonely, like, I knew that I'm surrounded by friends every day. I am however, the neediest fucker alive, and feel it's unfair to push that on other people. god it's just 'Having wants and needs and hating it' again. can you believe this shit.

[thehouseofurmotha]

Shinsou dating Aizawa's daughter head cannons :)

Pairing: Shinsou x Aizawa!Reader

I'm also working on a soulmate au with Shinsou 🤭 I fear he may be my favorite

• You and him meet when Aizawa asks you to spar with him, as you both have quirks that are less equipped for close range combat. You're in class 1-A too which is the class Shinsou would most likely join when he ends up in the hero course so it just made sense.

• You whoop his ass, he's immediately in love. He thinks you're extremely skilled and talented and pretty much begs you to help train him with your dad.

• Maybe it's because he wants to see you more often, but you don't need to know that.

• You ultimately agree and you and Shinsou pretty muuuuch become besties.

• But this is not enough for this man because he is absolutely enamored with you.

• One day while the two of you are sparing, your father leaves to go get another cup of coffee. And at this point he finally manages to pin you to the ground.

• For whatever reason he decides this is the best time to shoot his shot and is like, "Go on a date with me?" While he's just casually got you pinned to the ground.

• You don't manage to give him an answer before your dad gets back, but after you get up and brush yourself off you look at him and mouth a simple 'yes'.

• He smiles like a madman at this and your father looks at him and asks him what he's smiling about. He quickly goes back to his normal tired resting face with a quick nothing.

• Aizawa def thinks this is weird but he decides not to press any father. He feels bad pressing kids to tell him something they don't really have to.

• You guys go on a few dates before you officially start dating. Your father definitely notices that something about the two of you has changed but he doesn't realize that it has to do with the two of you being together.

• He finds out when he walks into your room while you and Shinsou were supposed to be just hanging out and watching a movie. Which he didn't find odd because the two of you had become fast friends with the friendly competition of sparring. But as he walks into your room to ask the two of you want for dinner he finds the two of you making out.

• He IMMEDIATELY kicks Shinsou out of your guys apartment. He isn't really mad that you guys are together he's just mad that you hid it from him and he had to find out like this.

• You guys have a very long conversation about being safe, and he definitely calls Midnight to handle most of it because he thinks he might just simply pass out from embarrassment. (You as well)

• He tells you he doesn't really care as long as you're happy. But this man does not let Shinsou live it down.

• Bro is fighting for his life during training the next day being worked so hard.

• Shinsou eventually gets back on your dad's good side and he comes over for weekly dinners.

I fear I may have an obsession with dadzawa.. and Shinsou.. I'm simply js a girl though. Anyways I hope you enjoyed :) <3 happy reading!

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

idk if this is a sex ed question, or if you're the right person to ask, sorry, but do you have any reputable sources about what testosterone *actually* does?

i see people saying it limits your emotions, that it gives you breast cancer, that it makes you malnourished, its a second more dangerous puberty, etc, and I'd like to think im good at picking out lies, but there's a lot of stuff that sounds like bullshit coming from blogs i thought were trustworthy.

if not, all good, thank you in advance!

hi anon,

I'm really glad you sent this ask, because this kind of scaremongering misinformation is deeply upsetting and I'm so happy to provide a better information.

there are tons of reputable sources as to what testosterone does; some that I'll be pulling from in this answer include Cleveland Clinic, Harvard Medical School, University of California San Francisco, Mayo Clinic, the Society for Endocrinology, and Planned Parenthood.

so, what's up testosterone?

testosterone is a hormone produced in everyone's bodies, either in the testes or the ovaries depending on which set of equipment you're working with. all bodies produce both estrogen and testosterone, usually in different levels. regardless of the genitalia you were born with, how you understand your gender, or what levels of testosterone you have in your body, testosterone affects things like your sex drive, your hair growth, muscle and bone density, and the production of red blood cells.

in people born with testes, puberty usually comes with an increase in testosterone that kicks off changes such as growth of the penis and testicles, the production of sperm, an increase in hair growth all over the body, deepening of the voice, greater production of oil on the skin, and an increase in height, weight, and muscle mass.

either an overabundance or a deficit of testosterone can have health complications, just as having more or less of any hormone that a body needs can cause complications.

people who choose to transition by taking testosterone will experience many similar effects as cisgender men going through puberty, including the increase in body hair, skin oils, and muscle mass, as well as a deepening voice. while people on testosterone are unlikely to experience significant growth in terms of height unless they start hormone replacement therapy (HRT) at a fairly young age, testosterone does frequently cause a redistribution of fat on their bodies to be more similar to that of cisgender men. bottom growth, the increased size and sensitivity of the clitoris to more closely resemble a penis, is also common; the clitoris and the penis are homologous structures (they're made out of the same goo when embryos start developing genitalia), hence why they react similarly to testosterone.

to address your specific concerns:

testosterone does not limit the range of a person's emotions. while it may impact a person's mood and the severity of their feelings, the same is true of any hormone - for instance, people also report mood changes when they take antidepressants or birth control. the sometimes drastic mood fluctuations experienced during puberty are not tied to a specific hormone; this is a turbulent time regardless of what hormones your body is producing the most. testosterone is stereotyped as making people angry and violent, but all people are people regardless of their biology and are shaped by much more than the hormones in their body.

while cisgender men and trans people on testosterone can both get breast cancer, testosterone does not pose any particular risk. several of the sources linked about don't find any significant link between taking testosterone HRT and an increased risk of breast cancer, reporting that transgender individuals who take testosterone are not at any particularly higher risk of developing breast cancer than cisgender women. for more detailed information about potential health problems affiliated with taking testosterone, I recommend the "Risks" section of the linked UCSF document. yes, there are health risks affiliated with taking testosterone; this is true of literally any medication and, more importantly, is also true of just being a person with any kind of hormones in your body. cis men and women also have health conditions affiliated with being cis men and cis women, this is the price of admission for having a human body. nobody gets out unscathed.

there is no evidence that testosterone causes someone to become malnourished. people undergoing a testosterone-based puberty, whether they're cis or trans, are likely to experience a great deal of growth and bodily changes that will use a great deal of calories, which means they may be hungry and need more food than they did previously. this is a normal effect of puberty on a body, and is only a risk for malnourishment if a person isn't able to eat in sufficient amounts to keep their body properly nourished.

there is nothing about a testosterone-based puberty that is "more dangerous" than an estrogen-based puberty, which is what I assume is the point of comparison. puberty is a completely natural process that does not pose any significant dangers unless you want to be a real dipshit about it and pull some shit like "puberty is dangerous because you grow breast tissue and then you're at risk for breast cancer," in which case sure, great job, Sherlock. you solved it, puberty is cancelled forever. I cannot emphasize enough how stupid this is, conceptually; roughly half the human population goes through this kind of puberty every day and they're fucking fine. puberty by itself is not a risk factor of anything.

I don't know what particular interest the blogs you've been following have in making testosterone-based puberty sound like it's going to turn you into an emotionally stunted skeleton with breast cancer, although I fear it's transphobia hidden unsubtly behind concern trolling and disdain for cisgender men.

if you're interested in taking testosterone and are concerned about the changes you might see in your body please, for the love of god, consult with reputable health resources and a doctor rather than whatever nematode is posting about testosterone ruining your life.

[crowhyun]

gym rat taehyun who you end us seeing frequently at the gym whenever you’re around too and he starts helping you out on some of the stuff and sexual tension and then BAM, sex

a/n: I haven't written smut in so long so please bare with me 😭 I'm trying to get back into the groove of it but I've kinda lost confidence though I hope that doesn't show in my works lol. I hope you enjoy this, anon, and thank you for requesting!!

Warnings: smut, pnv, exhibitionism, unprotected sex but hyun's pull out game is top tier, I would know

WC: 1.8k

The gym a few blocks away from your apartment was always too crowded for your taste. Midday was the worst, with every piece of equipment occupied, and the ones that weren't were a sweaty mess due to peoples' lack of politeness.

Though, around 10PM was always the best time to go. It was much less crowded, and it was almost calming, in a way.

You, along with a few other late night gym rats, took this time to your advantage. The gym was nearly empty, and hip-hop music played quietly from the speakers. The sound of equipment moving and barbells clanking was miniscule compared to how it usually was.

Though, you'd be lying to yourself if you said that that was the only reason you came to the gym at that time.

Your other reason - your main reason - was currently at the pull-up bar, biceps bulging and sweat dripping down his clear skin as he effortlessly hoisted himself up on the bar. You were quite familiar with this man, or at least as familiar as you could get from afar. Without fail, he'd always be at the gym at this time, always alone, and ever so efficient in his workouts.

You tried not to stare as you leisurely stretched. You weren't in the mood for heavy lifting or cardio, yet you were fully intent on boy watching.

After what seemed like over a dozen pull-ups, the man hopped down from the bar, turning around with a hand on his hip to grab his towel, and you quickly looked away to not get caught ogling. To look busy, you continued with your stretching, doing basic stretches to pass the time. You were so distracted trying to look busy that you hadn't even noticed a certain someone approaching until you heard his voice.

"Your form isn't good." He said, causing you to flinch and sir upright, staring right at the man who was sipping from his water bottle.

Is he talking to me?, you thought. Though, he was obvious who he was talking to, due to his large brown eyes seemingly piercing into your soul. "...huh?" Was all that you could muster out.

"Sorry." He apologized, screwing his water bottle shut. "I don't mean to bother you, but I just thought that I should tell you that your form isn't very good. You might hurt yourself."

Your lips went into an O-shape as you realized what he was saying, and you couldn't help but feel embarrassed. You fully expected him to just walk away after that, but he spoke once more.

"I can help with some stretches if you'd like." He said. "I'm no personal trainer, but I know a thing or two."

"Oh...you'd do that?" You asked, trying to keep your voice steady as you inwardly fangirled, knowing that this was the perfect opportunity to get closer to the man you've been crushing on.

"Yeah, of course." He nodded, placing his water bottle down and coming closer, your heart beating a mile a minute. He gave you a sweet smile before he bent down to your level, and you got a close up look at his sweaty skin and well built arms, causing you to shiver in anticipation.

"See, when you're doing lunge stretches, you have to make sure your back is flat and your core is engaged so that you can keep your balance." He said, his voice soft, though the near emptiness of the gym made it seem as if he were loud and clear. He got into position beside you, showing off the proper way to stretch, and you followed suit.

Throught the stretches, you had learned that his name was Taehyun, and he was pretty flexible himself. You may have even purposefully made yourself seem incompetent in your stretches so that he wouldn't leave anytime soon. It was getting later and later, but you didn't want to go home - not yet.

"Hamstring stretches are a bit harder, as most people don't stretch for long enough." He informed you, gently pushing you onto your back. "How flexible are you?" He asked, helping you to hike your leg up. You were hyper aware of the feeling of his strong hands on you, and the change of position nearly made you dizzy.

"Uh, maybe moderately?" You spoke, clearing your throat in an effort to sound like your panties weren't starting to get damp.

"Moderately?" He chuckled with a slight tilt to his head. "We'll see about that then, yeah? Just tell me when it's too much." He said, his hand circling around your calf as he started to slowly push your leg up...up...and up.

You winced a bit, the stretch starting to get painful, but you were too distracted by how he placed his other hand right on your thigh.

"There you go." He encouraged, your leg straight up and pushed against his shoulder as he kneeled down in front of you. "How're you feeling? Think you can go a bit more?"

"I can definitely feel the stretch." You chuckled, your heartrate beating a mile a minute. "I think I can go further, though."

With that, he started to slowly push your leg up once more, your thigh almost touching your chest. "Hmm, you're pretty flexible, aren't you?" He spoke, and you don't know if it's the rising desire within you or not, but his voice was starting to sound more...intimate.

"I didn't...I didn't realize before now." You said, finding it hard to breathe.

"Good thing you have me here then, huh?" He smirked, the sight making your walls clench around nothing. He then started to slowly lower your leg before doing the same to the other one. Your breath hitched at the stretch, and you winced.

"Fuck..." You whispered, unable to keep it in.

"Just a bit more, you got it." He said, his whisper matching yours as he stretched you further. His torso pressed against your leg, and you couldn't help yourself from taking a peek down between your legs. Truthfully, you just wanted to make sure you didn't completely soak through your leggings, but instead, you got a glimpse of what Taehyun was packing. The dim light of the gym reflected on the bulge in his gym shorts, and you literally felt your heart beat in your clit.

You quickly looked back up, eyes slightly widening, just to see that he was making eye contact with you. There was a certain gleam in his eyes that told you that he knew exactly what you were looking at.

If that didn't tell you enough, then his next actions did.

Stretching your leg so that your thigh met your chest, he positioned himself so that he was pressing up against you, and your breath hitched once you felt his bulge directly press against your clothed heat.

Shit...he's so close.

"There you go..." He said, his voice dangerously lustful. "Now you're all stretched out for me."

You weren't exactly sure when the switch flipped, and at this point, you didn't care if you were soaking through your leggings or not. You weren't crazy, his voice definitely held some underlying tension there, and neither of you could hide from it.

"Now that you're all stretched out, you can work out safely, no matter how hard."

Next thing you know, your leggings were hanging off of one leg, and your panties were pushed to the side to accommodate for how Taehyun's girth was stretching you out in a completely different way.

Sweat dripped down the strands of his wet hair, and your leg was hiked up on his shoulder, ensuring that you had no way to hide from just how deliciously he was rocking his hips into yours.

It was a caconaphy of hushed moans, grunts and whimpers, the sounds of your bodies colliding. You but your lip harshly to try and silence yourself even though you were pretty sure the gym was empty at this time. Taehyun's cock ruthlessly massaged your g-spot with each thrust, and he groaned in ecstacy as your nails dug into his arms in order to brace yourself.

"Ah- ah- ah-" Staccato moans left your lips as your body jerked each time his tip slammed against that spot within you, his pelvis hitting your clit over and over again.

"Fuck, you're so tight." He groaned, his brows furrowed in concentration, solely focused on fucking you dumb on his cock.

A loud keen ripped from your throat as he slightly adjusted his positioning, his cock hitting so deep inside your fluttering walls. Your hips bucked up and your other leg lifted, the urge to close your legs and run away from the numbing pleasure growing greater.

"Nuh-uh." Taehyun tsked, shaking his head as he roughly spread your legs, his cock pushing deeper inside of you. "C'mon, you can take it. Take this cock." He grunted, gifting you with a particularly harsh thrust that had you reeling.

Your head fell back on the mat underneath you and your thighs shook. You could feel his cock throb inside of you, his low grunts only driving you closer to the edge. You then gasped loudly, your jaw dropping and your body tensing.

"C-cumming, I'm cum-" You stammered out, only to cut yourself off with a high pitched moan that would've been impossible for you to keep in. Your pussy walls clamped around Taehyun's thick shaft like a vice, and he felt like he was seconds away from absolutely losing it at the way your fucked out face contorted into barely concealed pleasure as you creamed all around his cock.

He wrapped his hands around your wrists, holding you down as he pumped faster, his balls tightening as he saw completion on the horizon. "Mmmh, that's it...cum on my cock just like- hah- that." He groaned, his jaw clenching as his blunt nails dug into your wrists, and before he knew it, he couldn't take anymore.

He was quick to pull out of your tight heat, which was almost painful, but that no longer mattered to him, because his hot, thick cum was spurting out of his glistening cock and onto your stomach. The hottest whine left his throat as he came down from his high, his chest heaving up and down, and his eyes darting down to your fucked out form.

A few minutes of comfortable silence passed, the only sound being the low volume of the music playing through the gym speakers and the sound of the both of you catching your breaths.

"Well, uhm..." He suddenly spoke, clearing his throat. You noticed that he was avoiding eye contact, and the tips of his ears were tinted red.

Was he...embarrassed?

You fought the urge to laugh as he continued.

"If you just, uh...do those stretches before every workout, you should be good to go." He said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Thanks..." You spoke, your voice a bit hoarse. "For helping me stretch...and for the little present you gave me." You said, referring to his seed that was splattered across your stomach, seeping down to your belly button.

His eyes widened and he choked, almost as if he forgot that he had came on you.

"I'll...deal with that."

[marchofmistria]

Hi, I saw that your requests were open and I was wondering if you could make HC for when the farmer comes home all wrecked after a day at the mines (both bachelors and bachelorettes, if thats ok)

Hi there, thank you for sending :) Super fun to write for the bachelorettes as well as the bachelors <3 I'm writing these as established relationship HCs!

March

March can't help but worry about you each time you go to the times, no matter how nonchalant he tries to act or how many times he tells himself that you've been fine each time before.

Before you go, he'll always lecture you a bit and tell you to be careful (even though, he feels, this lecture goes ignored every time).

Without you asking, he'll spend time forging armor and swords that are strong and can provide a great deal of protection. You're clearly grateful for it, and it gives him peace of mind that you're wearing something he made so he's sure the quality is as good as possible.

If you're not back by a certain time, he'll go looking for you himself (even when, most of the time you're just fine).

The anxiety isn't totally unwarranted. There was a time once where he found you passed out in the mines, badly injured and attracting attention from monsters even in your unconscious state. He carried you all the way to Valen and had trouble sleeping for a day or two afterwards, even though Valen revived you no problem.

Sometimes March will insist on accompanying you from the start, claiming that he doesn't trust you to protect himself. You know not to take this as a blow to your defensive skills, but rather as proof of his deep love and care for you.

On the days you come home tired, he'll order you to go rest in bed and will wordlessly take care of you, whether that means cooking you dinner or washing off your sore body in the bath. He'll act annoyed, but you know that he doesn't mind at all taking care of you.

Ryis

Ryis worries about you when you spend late nights in the mines, but is also completely confident in your defensive skills. He knows that you're very strong, perhaps stronger than he would be down there.

He'd insist, however, that you pack food with you in case you grow exhausted down there.

He'd also make sure that you're wearing the best protection you could be. He'd probably call in a favor or two from March to give you the best equipment money could buy, just as an extra precaution.

He's always very excited and grateful when you bring home a trove of material or fascinating objects from your time down in the mines. He'd be interested to learn about all the materials that occur naturally down below, as well as the animal (monster) life living down there. Especially as Ryis would probably have little interest in going down there himself.

Ryis is less of a worrier than some others may be, but he'd definitely insist you be home by a certain time just so he could have total peace of mind and so that you two could spend the night together.

He'd definitely pamper you when you've had an exhausting day, whether that be from your time in the mines or from any other tasks you've had to complete throughout the day.

His care for you would definitely include nightly massages of your sore muscles. His idea of a perfect night is spent together in the bath with you, and then hanging out late into the night working on something relaxing like birdhouses, or even watching a movie together before falling asleep.

Hayden

One of the things Hayden loves and respects about you is your strength. He has plenty of it too, but is always deeply impressed by your ability to balance your work on the farm with your exploration of the mines.

He encourages your interests, and wants to give you as much time as possible to explore if that's what you feel like doing that day. He shows this encouragement by offering to take care of things on the farm on days when you want to go mining.

He hopes that'll take away some of your exhaustion, and he's more than happy to take care of you in that way. Any extra time spent with your animals is a happy day for him!

Hayden would care to make sure you're eating well before you go expending all that energy. He'll make lots of delicious food straight from the produce you've grown from the farm, and from the products donated by your animals.

Hayden wouldn't worry too much about your exploration in the mines, seeing how strong you are and how well you can handle yourself. He's just ready to get you home by the end of the night.

Hayden helps you recover by making sure you're well fed and well rested each day, without exception. If that means letting you sleep in a bit longer the next day and taking some of the load off your shoulders, he does it without a second thought.

Seeing his smiling face when you get home from a long day is enough to replenish some of your energy instantly. All Hayden cares about is that you're enjoying your days to the fullest in Mistria.

Balor

At first, Balor is more than supportive of your journeys down to the mines. After all, that's where you can find the rarest and most lucrative things for him to pawn off in the Capital!

It's also where you found a majority of the gifts that won his heart in the first place. It seemed like you were the only other person who appreciated these rare items to the same level he did, and he got so excited talking about it with you.

But once your relationship gets serious and progresses farther than just a business partnership, he starts to hate the days when you go down to the mines.

You always come back all scratched up and often injured, although usually not severely. Even so, he can't help but worry himself silly.

Yes, he's still excited when you come and happily show him all the wonderful things you've uncovered there that day. But he sure does wish there was another way to go about it.

He tries to persuade you to stop going down there, much to your surprise at first. You thought that he lived for these incredible finds. But he tells you that seeing you hurt isn't worth any amount of money.

He pays March a hefty sum to make you the best equipment and stocks you up with food each time you go. He can never get to sleep until he knows you're back home safe and have had your injuries healed.

He'll spend the rest of the night checking you to make sure you're really okay, and pampering you in every way possible. He wants you to know how grateful he is that you put yourself in danger on behalf of your mutual financial wellbeing. And he'll always have a special gift for you as an extra thank you.

Eiland

One thing that Eiland loves about you is your shared interest in all things archeological. The idea that there was someone as excited as him to explore the mysteries of the minds makes him deeply happy.

In fact, he's so excited and eager to find out what's down there that he doesn't really think of the extent of the danger. To be fair, he doesn't know that the mines are infected with a slew of monsters until you tell him.

When you first start returning to him after a day in the mines, you can spend hours discussing what you saw down there and going through all the evidence and artifacts you came across. Because you're equally excited as he is, he doesn't notice at first that you've injured yourself.

It's only after he sees you wincing in pain that he questions what happened, and then he feels terrible that he didn't notice it at first! When you confess to him all that's living down there, he instantly says that the mines must be closed off again.

Yes, he is deeply interested in what can be found down there. But the safety of the residents of Mistria are paramount. And you, as the person he cares about most in the world, take priority above all of that.

He feels a bit more reassured when you tell him that closing the mines is out of the question, that your injuries are not severe at all, and that on the contrary you absolutely love going down there. He's excited too, but just much more weary about your adventures now.

He'll stay late at the museum on nights when you decide to go into the mines, ready to meet you first thing once you exit. He has bottles of tonic to help you heal ready, as well as scores of delicious desserts to eat while talking over what you found that day. He's super eager, but will always prioritize your health over all else.

Valen

Valen doesn't stop being your doctor when she becomes your partner, and your health and safety are always her first priority. She knows she's not supposed to have any biases towards certain patients, but how could she not when she loves you so much?

Because of this, she really attempts to insist you stop going down to the mines. She knows that you find it fun and interesting, but she still doesn't fully understand. You make very decent money between the two of you, so it's not because of that.

She truly finds it difficult to understand why you don't prioritize your own health, especially with someone who worries so much about you waiting for you. But after discussing it, she concedes that she must let you enjoy your own interests and be there to support however she can.

You do agree to compromise on not staying out too late, as she cannot sleep at all until you're back home safe and your injuries are all tended to. Before you go, she prepares strong concoctions with her panacea to heal up most of your injuries instantly as soon as you're home.

On one occasion, when your injuries weren't mild and you had to stay overnight in the doctor's office, she didn't sleep a wink with worry for you. Even though she rationally understood that you'd be just fine in a few days, and of course trusted her own skills in taking care of you, her concern for you is overwhelming.

Most times, however, you're just fine and she's at home lovingly waiting for your return. She'll feed you a healthy dinner and run you a bath with salts to help soothe your aching muscles.

She'll always pack tonics to take with you as well, free of charge of course. You're incredibly grateful to have such a caring partner.

Juniper

Juniper tries really hard to act like she doesn't care what you're doing all day. She's still getting used to the idea of having a partner and showing vulnerability and care towards them.

She does care, really. It hurts her ego a tiny bit when she concedes to the fact that she does care. But at the same time, she can't do well at hiding her worry when you come home injured.

When you come back from the minds and show her everything you found, her interest is piqued. You consider it an enormous accomplishment the first time you gift her a crystal rose you found on one of the lower floors, telling her that she was the first thing you thought of when you saw the flower for the first time, and see her actually blush.

She can't even pretend to act proud at your "tribute." She's genuinely happy and flustered, and you consider that a win.

When you do come home hurt, she'll silently bring you into the bath house. Undressing you and then herself, she'll climb into the bath with you for a long soak.

That may include a massage as well, if you've caught her in a good mood or won her over that day with your gestures of affection via gifts from the mines. You can really get her if you tell her that you put yourself in harms way for her. She loves to feel like you put a lot of thought into her happiness.

She's not unaccustomed to flattery or worship, sure. But the real love, devotion, and attention she feels from you is new. And she's going to take steps to make sure the feeling is mutual.

Reina

Reina admires how strong you are, and how self-sufficient. But at the end of the day, she's still a big sister and being caring is her defining quality. She can't help but worry when you put yourself in danger.

She doesn't try to talk you out of it. She knows that there's no use in that. But she will do whatever she can to make your endeavors as safe as possible.

She insists of filling your bag with as much delicious food as you can carry without becoming over-encumbered. She'll cook all your favorites so you'll be more inclined to eat them as soon as your energy starts to wane in the mines.

You can always expect the same when you get back to her as well. She doesn't take no for an answer when it comes to you eating properly, even when you tell her that you've already eaten all the delicious things she packed for you during your excursion.

After you're well-fed and warmed up, you two like to relax the rest of the evening by the warm fire of the Inn, talking into the night and even sharing a warm Hot Toddy if you really need to wind down.

She's always interested to hear about everything you do each day, especially including what you do in the mines. She finds it fascinating, especially as that sort of stuff doesn't usually appeal to her. She's more than happy to listen to your tales rather than go do those things herself.

She'll often share your stories and brag of your strength and bravery to everyone who will listen when patronizing the Inn. She's proud to have such a strong and fearless partner.

Adeline

Adeline is a worrier by nature. She needs to have things under control as much as possible, and the fact that her partner is so fearless can be a difficult adjustment for her.

She knows that she needs to let you have your own hobbies. She also knows that she invited you to Mistria as an adventurer, so she can't go back on her word now.

Even so, she wishes you'd do just a little less adventuring now that you've found a home in the village. She doesn't tell you this directly, but also can't hide how stressed she gets when you're down there and she doesn't know how you're faring.

She makes you promise to be back by a certain time each night, and is upset if you ever miss that curfew. She knows that she can't boss you around like that, but you're willing to oblige her knowing how much stress she's already balancing and how much she cares about your well-being.

She does know what it's like to have someone deeply interesting in exploring, and is happy that her brother has a friend to discuss these things with now. She engages in the conversation and does find it interesting, especially if you're the one telling about it rather than Eiland. You just have a much more... engaging way of talking on the subject.

One thing that she will agree with you on is that the items you're able to find in the mines can be helpful to some of the townsfolk around Mistria. Whenever someone needs an item that may be hard to obtain, she admires the fact that you're quick to jump in and help (even if that means putting yourself in harms way). She loves that about you.

As soon as you're back home, she's making sure that you're well-rested in the most comfortable home, with the most comfortable pajamas and all the luxuries she can afford. If you're injured, she's happy to go to any lengths to make sure you get everything you need. It's the least she can do to prove how much she cares for you.

Celine

Celine is always terrified whenever you tell her you're going down to the mines. She can't imagine facing all those scary monsters and risking getting hurt! The worry is apparent on her face every time.

She knows that you're strong and more than capable, but she's scared for you nonetheless. One of the few times you see her act sternly is when she makes you promise that you'll avoid trouble there as much as possible and be home at a reasonable time.

It doesn't help that Dell encourages you completely. Opposite of what would usually be expected, Celine is worried that Dell is a bad influence on you and spurs you on into danger.

Celine tries to be supportive, but is always ready to take care of you whenever you come home from a long day in the mines. Her cottage is stock piled with medicines from Valen, delicious food cooked either by herself or by Reina, and a warm bed for you to rest in.

She cannot lie, though. Whenever you bring her a new rare plant or flower from the mines, she is so excited that she nearly forgets her reservations.

She'll spend hours reading about the fauna in her Codex Mistria, taking precious care of this wonderful gift you've given her. Her appreciation is apparent, and this incredible gift is almost worth letting you go down to the mines.

In any case, she's always excited to have you back home and will go above and beyond in taking care of you when youi're exhausted or even hurt.

[martiansodas-blog]

Art x reader meeting the readers parents and it's an absolute mess:(

(bonus points if he finds her old room and plays with her calico critters and plushies)

ok my brain automatically went to older! art soooo…

your parents knew 2 things about your new boyfriend.

1- he’s successful.

and 2- he’s a couple years older than you.

a couple years is an understatement.

but you figured once they met him and saw how sweet he treated you it wouldn’t matter!

this did not turn out to be the case.

your mom and dad took one look at him and made a snap judgment.

they knew his type, (supposedly.)

old money. a younger girl on his arm. cold and aloof. power hungry.

it’s a shame. this couldn’t be farther from the truth.

art donaldson may be a weapon on the court, but behind closed doors he’s the little spoon who makes you heart shaped pancakes.

“so. where did the two of you meet?” your mother asks, more to be pleasant and less because she wants to know the answer.

“at work,” you said , fondly remembering the exchange, “he was-“

“heckling my daughter in the workplace?”

“mom.” you warn “no.”

“honey,” your dad reigns her in

she huffs and crosses her arms in defeat.

“i was needing some more tennis equipment, actually.” art chimes in,

“yeah he was looking for these fancy sweatbands but we didn’t carry any, we just sort of got to talking.”

your dad gave you both a soft smile

“well, you seem to make our little girl very happy.”

incoming call from: tashi

“speaking of little girl, that’s probably her saying goodnight. excuse me.”

art very politely stepped out onto the porch.

“he has a kid?” your mothers eyes looked like they could pop out of her head at any second. “honestly why on earth would you think this is a good idea?”

“yes he does and she’s very sweet. her names lily.” you said firmly.

“so what? you’re gonna be a stepmom in your early twenties? is that what you want?”

“i wanted to introduce the person i love to my parents. but obviously that was a bad idea.”

your dad ushers your mom into their bedroom. he gives you a apologetic glance before he closes the door.

you stood there, frozen in the entryway for an unknown amount of time. as long as it took for art to finish his call and rest his hands on your shoulders from behind.

“hey hey, what’s the matter? what happened?”

you didn’t realize you were crying until you started to speak. well, tried to speak anyway.

“they,” you sniffed, “she…i’m sorry,”

“oh honey,” he pulled you into a hug.

you buried your face in his toned chest.

“i should’ve known this would happen” you heaved, gripping his shirt.

“shh, shh it’s ok. this is most definitely not your fault.”

he stroked your back and pressed feather light kisses to your hairline until you calmed down. when you removed yourself there was a wet patch right in the middle of his torso.

“let’s go upstairs, yeah?” he suggested gently.

he was almost using his dad voice.

you nodded, grabbed his coarse hand and guided him up the steps.

“so this is your childhood bedroom?”

art took in the whimsy filled room. the ceiling was only about a foot taller than him.

“the one and only.” you managed to crack a smile.

it was just how you’d left it at 18. the walls were pink and green. a choice you’d made at 7 and never got around to changing.

you’re glad you never painted over it now, though. it makes you feel innocent again, like a time capsule you can walk into.

art strolled around the room. looking at drama club trophies that lined the bookshelf, the collection of calico critters and the photo booth films stuck on your mirror.

there was a good amount of dust on everything. it caused a pit in your stomach to open up.

“you ok?”

“yeah” you nodded, “just got a little carried away by nostalgia.”

art wasn’t sure if touch would be the right thing for you right now, so he opened his arms, giving you the option.

you hugged him without a second thought. like an instinct. you squeezed him with all your might, like a stress ball. art hardly felt it, though.

figures.

“meeting my family will go better. my grandmas already looking forward to it.”

you lifted your head to look at him.

“really?”

such a simple sentence gave you butterflies.

“yeah,” he chuckled, like it was obvious “i’ve told her all about you.”

you truly didn’t know what to say. so touched by the sincerity and excitement in his tone. it. it caused you to break into a smile, a real smile, for the first time since you’d got to your parents house.

“i’d like that very much.”

[natalyarose]

𝒲𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒩𝑒𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝐻𝑒𝒶𝓇 - 𝓅𝒶𝒸 ♡

as always, use discernment and remember you're in charge of your life, readings can be useful tools of guidance ♡ take a deep breath, pick one of the flowers in the image, asking yourself which you feel most drawn to (if any, don't force it!) & proceed to your reading below💕

♡ Yellow Flowers (ace of swords, justice, the three of swords)

Take action! You have clarity and a strong intention in regards to something in your life. Perhaps you have come to an understanding or received a piece of information that is allowing you be equipped in taking the 'next step', whatever that is for you at this time. For some of you this is a message that if there is currently an unfair situation in your life, you will come out on top with your dignity in tact. Even when it's tough, stay honest, true and precise in what you know & believe. You are someone who has strong convictions & intuitive insights, remember to keep your words and perceptions pure & unbiased to remain sharp.

Remember that having true knowledge and understanding requires having a fair mind- be mindful of getting 'tunnel vision' on topics that are close to your heart. For some, this pertains to you being hard on yourself and is a message that you need to be balanced in your self perception to truly make progress.

Another message is that if there's anything you know you need to speak up about, you are being encouraged to do so & to be brave! ♡ I'm once again, as I'm writing this being brought back to the message that you are coming out on top in something. There could be somebody who wronged/hurt you and that's being made right, or you've developed a newfound perspective that's giving you an internal sense of balance & healing. You may be getting justice of some kind for some immense pain or trauma you've endured- and again that justice could be an internal feeling/realisation.

♡ Pink Flower (eight of pentacles, the chariot, the empress)

You are working hard on something- it could be an artistic or academic project, career-related, anything. I see this as a message of encouragement to keep working on it and be proud of your work-in-progress. Whatever it is you're working on is soon going to open doors you've always dreamed of opening. I really see you almost 'levelling up' in life in due time as a result of your efforts. It may seem small right now, but your dedicated, humble work and consistency is going to lead to bigger things and an abundance of recognition, praise and status of some kind. Even if it feels like nobody is paying attention right now or everything seems so unrefined, the work you are putting in now will eventually grant you respect, admiration and potentially lead to a life with abundant financial prosperity & material beauty surrounding you.

I think there is also a message here surrounding allowing yourself and your skills to grow and evolve- remembering that you don't have to be everything you dream of being all at once, it's okay to be a work in progress and know that with time and dedication, you will grow. Time is on your side. Successful people weren't always the people you know them as now- they were once just starting out, with less resources and expertise. Trust that in time you will flourish in the same way!

If anyone who picked this group is working towards something beauty related- perhaps just manifesting feeling more beautiful and embodied- this is a sign that your actions towards refinement + attention to detail will be fruitful and lead to you feeling & presenting as beautiful as you deserve to feel!

♡ Red Flower (eight of wands, 5 of wands, 2 of cups)

There is a sense of good news or positive change in the air for you :) I get the sense that life is going to be getting a little more busy & chaotic for you, but in a good, fresh way. Divine protection can also be a theme for this group. Like your aura is just (or is intended to be) bathing in positive energy. I am seeing that there is some sort of conflict you are overcoming, it could be with a specific person. If you've been fighting a lot/at odds with someone or some people close to you, I see that being resolved and that lifting a huge weight off of your shoulders. For others of you I'm getting a message that there is somebody who seems to always be challenging your positivity. Perhaps for some it's not a person, so much as external influences, media, etc. in general that kinda *tries* to rain on your parade. For some of you I see you confronting that person/thing, but for others I see this as a message to not allow these energies to overtake you. Just let them fly past, don't get involved with the 'dramas' & leave it up to the universe.

People may be making you feel as though your optimism is blind or naive, or this could've been the case in the past. Remember that the only reason they considered your optimism to be blind, was because they themselves couldn't see it. Right now, what belongs to you is joy, excitement, optimism and new opportunities. Have no shame in embracing that regardless of others pessimism/jealousy. I'm sensing that some of you are needing new friends or at least, a circle more on your wavelength that doesn't put you down for your spiritual or positive nature. The right people for you will be the ones who share this positive energy and sense of joy with you and are delighted to have a friend in life who possesses such a quality!

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

[elicathebunny]

How to utilise the holidays/term breaks well for a successful academic year

Do you need to catch up on revising the things you didn't pay attention to in class or maybe you just need to put in some extra effort to up a grade? I'm going to walk you through my personal tips for revising efficiently throughout the holidays and term breaks without disrupting your freedom away from learning too much.

I. The Defining Phase

First, you need to figure out what you need to study the most. You should figure this out by knowing what subjects you need to spend a little bit more time on than others and revising what you already know well from time to time to keep the information fresh. Make sure you don't spend too much time on the topics you know very well, I know it's tempting and easier but you are not learning anything new or prioritising the subjects you do need to work on. The more you practice in the difficult areas, the more easier they will become too.

II. The Planning Phase

Now you know what you need to revise/study. You can make a schedule around your free days. Obviously don't force yourself to study or revise when you are enjoying your holidays off from education, so you need to work out days that you can dedicate to your learning.

To make things easier for yourself, gather the resources you need (physical or online) and make them easily available to you to get rid of the faf when starting to revise. If you know you may need extra help, utilise the online teachers and AI chatbots.

-> Don't cheat with them, these are helpful ways to check your answers and to understand the questions that you wouldn't have gotten with step-by-step help

Make sure to schedule days that you can rest and enjoy your break from school. Please don't overload yourself with lots of study days because you will burn out and miss out on your holiday. Instead make a doable schedule based on your lifestyle and what's going on in your week, dedicating just 20-60 mins is enough for a day to get all the information in your head.

Allow yourself to have breaks in between study sessions so you can reset your brain before continuing to learn.

for example: for every 1hr 30 mins studying, take a 15 min break for every 1hr studying, take a 10 min break for every 30 minutes studying, take a 5 min break [every 30 mins = 5 mins break]

if you do anything below or above the times I gave, then round it up to the nearest 30 minutes and calculate the break you should have.

III. Avoiding procrastination

SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS !!

Put your study equipment on your desk, organised and ready for you to begin your session. Keep all distractions you know will interrupt your studying away from your space. Put your phone away and keep it away from your desk, turn it on do not disturb until you have finished your session. Make sure your space is clean and organised, clear space = clear mind.

Play some ambient music in the background if you need something to break the silence. Preferably choose a background sound with no lyrics or a beat to distract you. The music will keep you focused if you need it.

a. how to stop relying on motivation purely.

Motivation often comes in short bursts and fades away, leaving you less determined to pursue your goals. Relying solely on motivation means you only act when you feel like it. Sometimes, we need to do things that benefit us even when we don’t feel like it. That's why motivation isn’t reliable in the long run. Instead, we need to develop discipline. Discipline helps you push through when you don’t feel like doing something, focusing on the long-term benefits rather than your current feelings. Doing something over and over again builds a habit, this will make it easier to get up and get it done without a fuss.

xoxo

E.B

[sophaeros]

arctic monkeys for clash magazine, april 2010

ON THE ROAD WITH… ARCTIC MONKEYS

Words by Simon Harper Photos by Jason Joyce

As Britain’s favourite band headed out on the European leg of their ‘Humbug’ tour, Clash discovered that Arctic Monkeys were less sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll, and more cakes, ping-pong and Coco Pops…

The city of Offenbach, about twenty minutes south of Frankfurt, was once noted for its abundant leather industry, and is currently the base of the German weather service, but such claims don’t negate the fact that it’s basically a sterile, grey, typically German suburban borough. The arrival of a fleet of trucks and buses, carrying Arctic Monkeys, their crew and stage gear, heralded the notion that for one night only, Offenbach may just come alive with suitably bustling energy.

Offenbach’s Stadthalle is the smallest venue on the Monkeys’ three-week tour of Western Europe. The band have been through Portugal, Spain and France, and know how to kill time during the day while everyone works around them, building the stage for that night’s show. And so, when Clash finds them, upstairs in the Stadthalle’s back rooms, they’re in the middle of a fierce ping-pong match – the game scores being tallied up across the tour. The table, it transpires, is the band’s own, and follows them wherever they go. A set of football goals lie waiting for action, but the small white balls prove more enticing.

It’s a cold, February Tuesday, and these back rooms are where the band will spend the whole day.

Previous encounters with Arctic Monkeys have been somewhat tough – notoriously reticent and famously press-shy, there’s a tangible wall that surrounds them, which is seemingly hard to penetrate. Suspicious stares cut through you, while succinct answers frustrate you. Today, however, they couldn’t be more accommodating.

Clash sits with the quartet in the band-only room, where their personal equipment is kept in a vertical flight case of drawers, and a small fridge is at hand for cold beers. Nick O’Malley, Jamie Cook and Matt Helders sprawl on the leather couches, while Alex Turner perches on the table, often pacing the room, then escaping in search of a lighter. We’re here to talk about life on the road. What starts as an interview eventually descends into louche conversation; daft chat punctuated by much laughter. Perhaps they’re glad to see a friendly face; perhaps the monotony of touring makes them crave any respite; perhaps there’s nothing better to do in Offenbach.

Is being on tour like real life, or does it feel like you’re detached from what real life is?

Matt: It’s probably real life. It doesn’t seem like it’s too separate or miles away.

When you go home is that normality or is it just a continuation of what you do on the road?

Matt: I don’t find it hard to settle back and switch between the two.

Nick: You feel like you’re unemployed when you go home properly.

Like you’ve got nothing to do?

Nick: Yeah, or like if you’ve got a couple of weeks off.

Matt: Like school holidays.

Alex: Does that make this school then?

Matt: Yeah, but it’s like basketball camp or something you enjoy.

How do your friendships cope with life on the road? 

Matt: It’s fine.

Nick: Yeah. We know how to not annoy each other. We’ve never really had friction, because we’ve all got a similar outlook on how not to annoy people, I suppose, so there’s never really been any problems.

Alex: (Mock nastily) That’s what you think, mate.

Nick: (Laughs) I suppose if you see the same people every day, after a while you’re bound to get a bit annoyed, but as long as you keep in your mind that it’s just because of the situation and not because you don’t like the person, then you can kind of avoid outbursts that you might not mean. It’s never really been a problem so far.

Do you notice a huge cultural difference between touring Europe and America? 

Alex: Even between places in Europe. I mean, often, to be honest, certainly at this stage that we’re at, days like today aren’t uncommon, where you’re out of town and you don’t even really see where you are, as I’m sure you’re aware. But you can really tell the difference just in the show, from the crowd. We did Madrid and Barcelona over t’weekend, and last week Portugal, and they were really excitable and there was like a frenzy going on when we were playing. Whereas I think crowds elsewhere can be a bit more reserved, can’t they, depending on where it is. I reckon one of the best crowds on this tour was a gig we did last week in Porto. We’ve never played there before. There was this real appreciation or something just from the start. You can just sort of feel it, can’t you; ‘We’re all here to have a laugh’.

Alex lives in the States now. Have any of you considered moving to somewhere you’ve visited on tour?

Matt: Yeah. It’s good that you do get to see places that you might consider moving, like Berlin. I could imagine living there.

Does living apart make you appreciate each other more when you’re back together?

Jamie: [Long pause] Mmmm…yeah.

Gone are the days when you’re living round the corner from each other.

Alex: Yeah, I suppose that’s true. You’ve got to sort of organise to be in one place. I suppose that is a bit of an inconvenient drag.

Are there any essential items that you have to pack before you come out on tour?

Jamie: One of them rolly things that gets fluff of your coat. (All laugh)

Alex: I feel like you’re a lot better equipped than the rest of us with things like that.

Yeah, you’re looking very bobble-less.

Jamie: Ah, cheers. Yeah, I did it this morning actually. A quick roll.

Matt: A skipping rope – except I forgot it this time. I’ve lost mine.

Nick: DVDs, stuff like that.

A ping-pong table?

Jamie: A ping-pong table is essential actually. I don’t think we’d go on tour without that.

Alex: Some kind of series…

Matt: A box-set.

Alex: Kinda really discovered that this last year. It was summat I’d never really got into before.

Nick: Any HBO series.

Alex: (Laughs) Yeah. I’ve really learned to appreciate that sort of continuum, because you can follow a thread.

Matt: You know what you need to do the next day.

What have you been watching?

Alex: We’ve got into Deadwood a bit on the last tour. That’s what’s been missing, I think, for me on this tour, some sort of thing like that.

Have you done The Wire?

Alex: Yeah.  I went Wire mad on that tour. I just got so greedy. I get so greedy with them things.

Matt: I couldn’t catch up.

Jamie: Yeah, he ditched everyone. I got ditched on t’second series!

Matt: Six in t’morning, I could hear him.

Jamie: You’d get up and that [theme] song would be on. It’d just be crisps all over, a bottle of…

Nick: ‘Wire Beast’s been up all night again!’

Alex: ‘Where’d you get that dressing gown from?’

Jamie: Just laying there with crumbs all over him.

Have you ever had any scares at customs? 

Nick: I got searched yesterday actually.

Matt: It was your squeaky wheels, just as I’d said. I said, ‘Them wheels are gonna attract attention.’

Nick: In Germany. A very thorough search, but luckily no glove action.

Jamie: They probably wanted to mend your wheels for you.

Matt: ‘I’ve got summat for that, some GT85.’

Nick: They were really suspicious of me. They really took everything apart and didn’t put it back as neat as I’d put it in.

Alex: At this end, yesterday?

Nick: Yeah, when we arrived in ‘Munchen’.

Alex: They’re quite, like, strict, aren’t they, Bavarian authorities.

Nick: Yeah. They had a look at me belt, everything. All me case and bag. Took everything apart. Then he were like, ‘Where have you come from?’ I went, ‘Barcelona’. He were like, ‘Have you had any contact with drugs in Barcelona?’ I went, ‘No.’ He went, ‘What do you do?’ I said, ‘I’m in a band.’ And he went, ‘Ah’, and then, like, swabbed everything.

Alex: When I got in t’car yesterday, the fella were like, [German accent] ‘If you like to do drugs, do not try and do it in Bavaria.’

American customs scare me most. 

Matt: Yeah, it’s a load of questions.

Alex: ‘What are you doing here?’

Jamie: New Zealand were quite funny. We all got pulled…

Matt: We had to sit in them chairs for a bit…

Jamie: And this guy was asking us directly the last time we ever did drugs. Then someone came over who worked for us…and he soon disappeared rather fast. We were fine. (All laugh)

Alex: I’ve come to quite enjoy the American customs people. (All laugh)

Matt: They’ve always got weird names.

Alex: They’re like, [American accent] ‘So you’re in a band, huh?’ You go, ‘Yeah, yeah.’ ‘What do you do in the band?’ ‘Oh, I’m the singer.’ ‘Yeah? You don’t look like a singer to me.’

Nick: ‘Do you sound like Coldplay?’

Alex: Yeah, ‘What kind of music do you guys play?’

Jamie: ‘Do you sound like Staind?’ I went like, ‘Staind? I know them… Fuckin’ hell!’ It took me ages. ‘Yeah, yeah, we sound a bit like Staind.’ When he said it I were like, ‘Yeah, a bit.’

You’ve said before that you wanted to try and get an album out this year. Do you get any time on the road to do any work on that?

Alex: Not really. That’s a bit of a pain in the arse, not being able to rehearse and work stuff out. I don’t think I write very good songs on t’road. They’re all a bit wonky. You get back and you’re like, ‘Hmmm’.

Does it detach you from what we were talking about earlier, ‘real life’? Does it detach you from the things that you want to be writing about?

Alex: I dunno. You can still use your imagination, but I just think, yeah, in your surroundings there’s always about to be something that’s going to happen. You can’t think. I always write wherever I am, but I dunno if the things that come out when you’re touring around always have the shelf life that the other things do.

Have you got any songs earmarked for the next album?

Alex: Yeah. I mean, there’s some ideas, but we haven’t really had the chance to get out the fine toothed comb.

‘Humbug’ was a departure in sound from your previous albums – do you think you’ll continue in that direction, maybe bring Josh Homme in again?

Alex: Not sure, really. We would like to do something with Josh again – it was terrific for us to go on that adventure – but whether or not it’s this next thing, I’m not sure. And also, like, he’s busy! (Laughs) He’s got a schedule himself, doesn’t he?

You went to record over in his place, so do you think next time you’ll have him over to...

Alex: High Green? (Laughs) Homme in High Green? I quite fancy that.

Nick: He’d look like a superhero in High Green, all the bad genetics there are in High Green. He’d look amazing.

Matt: He’d be the biggest man there.

You’ve released a couple of singles exclusively through Oxfam. What made you decide to do that? 

Jamie: Laurence and Jonny at Domino came to us with that idea – a great idea for the charity reason, and then cos Woolworths and stuff had shut down, but there were always an Oxfam.

Alex: Like, in towns where there perhaps aren’t, like, an Our Price or something.

Do you have to think of more creative ways to get your records out there?

Jamie: Yeah, rather than just sat at home.

Matt: They should think about making the journey exciting – paint paths a nice colour to the record shops.

Alex: The yellow brick road.

Matt: Something that makes people want to walk to a record shop. Even if it’s just free parking. (All laugh)

Jamie: It’s just too easy to buy music now.

How do you feel as artists about the devaluing of music? Does it annoy you that you’re working hard to make something, but people can just pick it up from their friends?

Jamie: I suppose we were never in the industry when it were big money, when people used to sell twenty million albums. Has that ever happened since we’ve been around?

Probably someone like Dido has.

Jamie: Yeah, that were probably the last.

Matt: It’s like, we wouldn’t expect anything like that to happen to us, so…

Alex: I do think there is people that always will want to go and get records.

Matt: Yeah, it won’t change everybody.

Alex: I was reading a couple of months ago about there’s an idea where you won’t even have – you know like you pull songs off iTunes or whatever – but they were saying you subscribe to a database and pay to get ’em…

Jamie: Spotify, that’s what that was.

Alex: Yeah. But you can’t get them on…

It streams the music – you can’t download them.

Alex: But you can’t do that on your phone, can you?

Matt: Yeah, you can do Spotify on your phone if you pay about £10 a month. Nokia did that thing where you can just pay a monthly thing and you can have as many as you want…

Alex: The fella had a quote, he’s like, ‘There’s nothing sexy about an MP3 on your desktop’. (Laughs) He’s like, ‘There’s nothing sexy about having a subscription to a database’. (All laugh) But then you could just sort of buy a record and stand it up against your wall. Not that that’s particularly sexy, but, you know what I mean… I like things that you can stand up.

Jamie: Like you said the other day, everyone’s just gonna have an empty house.

Matt: Yeah, there’s gonna be nothing on t’shelves. Not even books now.

Jamie: No one’s got any photos anymore, no ones’s got any CDs or records…

Matt: You’ll just have a screen and a chair.

Jamie: You’ll just go, ‘Sound. This is sound.’

Matt: With nowt on your wall.

Jamie: You can just have everything [at your fingertips]; turn your fire on, open your curtains…

Alex: You’d get in it for your bath. (All laugh)

[Alex goes into the band’s equipment drawer, pulls out a giant figure of Freddie Mercury in full-on rock pose. “See, he said he likes things that stand up,” Matt says.]

Does being on an independent label give you the freedom to experiment with your marketing or promotions? 

Matt: Yeah. They [Domino] have as many ideas as us for stuff like that, like the Oxfam thing. They tend to think on a similar level, and, at the same time, if we have a suggestion, they’re open to it. It sometimes is a good thing to have a label like Domino, cos they’re experienced in doing weird stuff, and have obviously signed things that aren’t necessarily to make any money or anything, so we’ll listen to them if they have a suggestion, and vice versa. They’d put records out on tins of beans and all sorts. (All laugh)

Jamie: I wanted to do it on a conifer. I wanted to put an MP3 out on a conifer.

Matt: Or just seeds. Christmas tree seeds.

Alex: Yeah. What did they actually do?

Matt: There’s a Jewish guy, I forgot what his name is, and they did it on a kosher chicken noodle soup or something. You buy the soup and you get the code [for the MP3]. Which is good in a way, because he’s just poo-pooing the fact that there’s not much point. It’s an incentive, but it doesn’t get it in the chart, you see. It’s a give-away. So you can sell anything and just have an MP3 code on it. You can sell a car and you’d just get one song.

Jamie: But then it doesn’t count towards t’charts?

Matt: No. The Oxfam thing don’t either, does it. Only the download bit does. You’re not allowed to give away incentives like free stuff, because that’s obviously encouraging people. See, that’s the thing – people might buy the soup and not download the song. ‘I wonder if they make good soup?’

Jamie: When you see a good cover sometimes…

Matt: Yeah, you buy it for the cover.

Alex: Perhaps the epitome of that is you buying a Lady Gaga picture disc. (Laughs)

Matt: Yeah, I did. I’ve been a fool.

Alex: It’s great, cos she’s wearing like a fuckin’ box of Coco Pops or something. (Laughs)

Matt: You could buy that Freddie Mercury thing and get a Queen album, for instance. You don’t need to put it on or owt.

Jamie: You want to make it awkward.

Matt: Buy a chair. Buy a flat pack piece of furniture and you get a code for an album.

Jamie: You have to put your furniture up and send a picture to someone, then they send you the MP3.

Alex: That would make a good video: playing in a bowl of Coco Pops. (All laugh) Remember that kids programme where they used to have to go swimming in a bowl of cereal…

Jamie: Ah yeah. Didn’t they used to do something like that on The Big Breakfast?

Matt: They did, yeah.

Jamie: It were a massive cup of tea and you used to have to get the sugar lumps…

Matt: Yeah, yeah, that was it: One Lump Or Two.

Jamie: One Lump Or Two, yeah!

Alex: It would be great: kid comes down, he’s having his breakfast – Coco Pops – and then, like, Arctic Monkeys are in his cereal. (All laugh)

Jamie: Hot milk, though.

Matt: Hot milk in t’afternoon.

Alex: (Laughs) ‘Why not try Coco Pops after school?’

Jamie: (Laughs) I love that advert!

Alex: It’s the best!

Do your fans give you CDs of their bands?

Matt: They throw them on t’stage! Imagine if you got one of them in t’eye! Fuckin’ hell! Remember in America, a kid got on stage and he had a handful [of CDs] and someone had to grab him to get him off, but he threw them. So he were getting pulled away and he threw them.

Alex: I’ve been getting less CDs though…

Matt: Now they’re throwing download cards at you!

Alex: I got a pair of underpants…

Jamie: People are chucking downloads at you. You’re like, ‘What the fuck?’

Matt: People are throwing zeroes and ones at you – it’s like the credits of The Matrix!

Jamie: You can’t get any flick on a download.

Alex: They’re chucking Spotifys at me. Maybe that’s what them pants were – some sort of code.

I think it’d be a totally different sort of code! Do you listen to the music that fans give you?

Matt: I listened to one that someone gave me the other day. It just were at home though, he just gave it me.

Alex: No more than I’d wear that pair of pants! (Laughs)

Matt: It were just convenient – I were getting in me car and there’s a CD player there.

What’s the strangest thing a fan has given you?

Matt: Just in Japan – everything you get is weird! Like, a monkey hat – it left your own face in but it’s got ears and a tail.

Jamie: And sweets.

Matt: A lot of sweets.

Jamie: We once said, ‘Oh, we like these sweets’ in an interview…

Nick: There’s someone that makes baked goods.

Matt: You got a good one, where it were like a picture of you…

Alex: Yeah, I got like a diagram of myself…

Matt: A diagram, pointing at every bit, and then asking to fill in, like, what his favourite brand of jeans were.

Alex: Hand it back, and then she’d sort of kit me out.

Matt: She’d buy it all! So, like, ‘Favourite shoes? Trainers or boots?’ It would be like that. He’d fill it in and send it back and then she’d buy it. ‘Will this do?’

Alex: Back it came with this jumper that were perfect actually. She really knew me better than I knew meself.

Nick: With baked goods, I know it’s not [spiked], but you never know… It’s probably fine – it’s more than likely fine – but it is a gamble.

Matt: It’s innocent, but someone might have seen that opportunity.

Jamie: I don’t think I’m ever gonna eat a baked good that some stranger’s made. You learn about that. There is a story there…

What’s the first thing you do when you get home after the tour is finished? 

Nick: See your friends and family that you’ve not seen.

Matt: I go and get my photos developed. That’s actually one of the first things I do.

Alex: I usually pick up me guitar. Honestly. It’s a deep breath.

Later that evening, Clash is back in the ping-pong room. The tour manager comes to break bad news to the band - the curtain at the front of the stage is broken. They won't be able to make their usual grand entrance. "Ah, we've got to do it," grins Alex. Do what? "We've been saying on this tour if ever the curtain doesn't work, we've got to go on to this song." Which song? "Black Eyed Peas’ ‘I Gotta Feelin’’," Alex beams. The band are giddily bouncing around, electrified by the prospect of taking the stage to the song that's soundtracked many a menopausal vodka-stained Saturday evening's preparatory gathering.

“But when do we go on?" Matt asks.

"The rap. We gotta wait for the rap," Alex asserts.

"We should wait until "Mazel tov”,” Jamie smirks.

Ten minutes later, Clash is amidst the Offenbach crowd when the lights go out and the song bursts from the PA. A wave of euphoria swells, the irony not lost, and right on cue, just as the Peas declare, "I know that we'll have a ball", the four Monkeys stride towards their instruments.

The nineteen-song set covers their three albums - with Nick Cave's 'Red Right Hand’ thrown in for good measure. The last song before their encore is 'Secret Door’ from 'Humbug’. Just as Matt cracks the snare drum that launches the song's long psychedelic outro, cannons on the roof blast out gold and silver confetti over the joyous crowd below, proving that the Monkeys aren't averse to a bit of showmanship every now and then.

The after party is a subdued affair (well, in Offenbach it's bound to be!), with just the band, some friends, crew, and Clash, diving into the beer and nibbles on offer. A fairly drunken chat with Alex about Johnny Cash, Billie Holiday and Gram Parsons rounds off our time with the band, as they retreat back to the confines of their bus, about to depart for Dusseldor and their next gig.

Such a welcome and warm atmosphere is often rare backstage, especially with a band as celebrated as this, but the Monkeys - ever changing and ever surprising - are beginning to make a habit of defying expectations. Growing up has never been such fun.

[hiddenlongingsfanfic]

Fresh Out of Luck (Lucky Boys 2)

“So…uh Hood? Are you okay?” 

Danny could feel the flood of fond exasperation that swept through the man across from him and he finally let his muscles loosen. 

The man may have been stand-up enough to pull him from electrified waters but that didn’t always mean much.  The fact that he seemed closer to laughter than anger after a pretty intense, if short-lived, fight was definitely a point in his favor. 

Maybe now that they’d sized each other up Danny could just slink out of this guys haunt without any further problems. 

I mean, he had a lot of problems actually, but this could be one less. 

Maybe? 

Possibly? 

As he struggled to regain his footing Danny felt the other man's full attention settle back on him. 

Absolutely everything throbbed on his body as he got back up. 

The fall and the electric shock would have been enough for him to retreat to his core even a year ago. He was tougher now, more used to pain. So he was up and on his feet even though it was nearly the last thing he wanted to do. If the ground had been just a little softer or the man across from him had been just a little less scary Danny would have stayed face-planted right where he was.  As it was, one of his feet dragged behind him a little as he started to stumble away. 

Ow. 

Ow. 

Ow! 

Behind him the man cleared his throat pointedly and Danny turned his head just enough to see him out of the corner of his eye. 

“I’m fine O; but we’ll need some sort of medical assistance for our…visitor.” 

Danny didn’t even try to hold back the rumbling bass of the growl that erupted from his chest. 

Like hell. 

The other man. 

Hood? 

Raised an eyebrow at him and after a breath of thought seemed to purposefully push a little hesitant reassurance towards him. 

Danny’s nostrils flared wide and on the exhale he pushed out a wisp of frosty air. 

Which hadn’t happened before when Hood had sent emotions his way. 

This was the first time it seemed intentional though. 

As though he’d put some effort into it rather than an instinctual response. 

Which, if this was the man’s first time meeting another ghost-adjacent person, was pretty impressive. 

More than just a very, pretty face whatever he was. 

But Danny had learned his lesson about being led around by pretty people who were able to beat the shit out of him without breaking a sweat. 

Danny relaxed his grip on his solid form and felt the dim shadows of the sewers recede just a little bit more as his skin started to glow. His legs merged together into his tail and he let himself start to float into the air with, if not ease, at least long practice. 

Hood’s eyes widened a little at the transformation but didn’t budge an inch.  Instead, he let his head fall back a little against the wall deliberately making himself look more relaxed and less threatening. Danny may not be able to speak because of the muzzle but his derisive snort spoke volumes. Hood held his hands up in silent surrender. 

“Okay. Fine. No hospital or anything. But we can help you with the muzzle at least. See about getting that off your face.” 

Danny snorted again and this time he let himself float back up towards a thin sliver of night sky that he could see. It wouldn’t be wide enough for his shoulders but the plastic would fit through easily enough through the small gap. 

The man’s voice was fading but he could still feel the surge of worried aggravation when he said. 

“Fine. Have it your way.” 

Whoever O was hadn’t had any sort of audible reaction to what Hood had said so they probably had cameras along with the other equipment that the man was packing. So at least two people in this strange new world had already seen his face and what the GIW had done to him. 

It took a little bit of wriggling, and the painful stretch of the plastic muzzle compressing on his face but Danny managed to slide back onto the streets. 

Camera’s didn’t tend to work too well around him but the tech from this world might be different. 

So with another shuddering effort Danny managed to make himself go invisible and intangible. 

From what he had seen while he was falling from the crumbling portal he had landed in a sizable city. 

The stars were all wrong and he couldn’t quite grasp where he was in relation to where he had been. 

Did this Earth even have the same number of continents? 

Countries? 

Not that it really mattered. 

There was no going back to the life (HA!) that he had had before. 

Wherever he had landed, it looked rough. 

A lot of the streetlights had been smashed, leaving deep pools of darkness that Danny purposefully skirted around.

Even if the only thing that was still visible was the muzzle he didn’t need anybody trying to grab onto his face. 

He flitted through the back alleys ignoring the deals for both drugs and bodies that were going on around him. 

Everything looked as consensual as it could be and he didn’t see any kids involved. 

Frankly, at that point he considered it none of his business. 

He was also just tired. 

Most of the buildings looked like they were occupied; with the occasional spot of warm flickering light from a television. But any city of even moderate size was going to have abandoned buildings. It took him a little while but Danny finally found what looked like an abandoned apartment building. Most of the windows had been smashed and the front door was hanging off of a single hinge at an angle that suggested it had been pushed inwards forcefully. 

Danny cautiously floated up a couple of stories and peered in through a few windows.   He could see the occasional sleeping bag and the small stashes of supplies that some of the city's homeless had left there but between the police tape and the blood stains Danny figured something violent had happened here. 

Violent enough to keep all but the most desperate of people out of the building. 

Perfect. 

The building was steeped in death and when Danny put a cautious hand on the bricks he could feel the treacle creep of the ectoplasm that inundated the porous surfaces. 

He carefully maneuvered the muzzle through the shattered remnants of wood from a boarded off window. 

The rest of his body slipped through the boards with no issue. 

The apartment had never been anything glamorous. 

Wall to wall carpeting in a shade that may have been beige but now had a noxious undertone of green from the mold and the water damage. The wallpaper had once had fat yellow roses peppering the wall in inconsistent rows, mismatched now where the sun had faded the once bright colors.  

Danny took in a deep breath of decay, it felt just like home. 

Danny let himself relax back into visibility as he scanned the room in front of him. 

There were water stains creeping up the drywall, heaviest around the window and in the corners leaving the once cheerful wallpaper peeling up and bubbling. 

He let himself spin around for a moment taking it all in. 

Not a single piece of rubble was anything even close to white in color. 

No medical equipment. 

No weapons, ecto or otherwise. 

Danny let out a low rumble of pleasure. 

Perfection. 

He’d go out and scavenge some blankets. 

See if he couldn’t cobble together some sort of generator. 

He had never been the brains of the family, but he was no lightweight when it came to cannibalizing what someone else had already built. 

Danny dragged the remains of a moth-eaten comforter into the darkest corner of the living room and let himself fully curl up onto it with a heavy sigh. Thin lines of ectoplasm started slowly leaking up out of the floor and made a beeline for his chest. When he finally dropped off to sleep Danny felt better than he had in years. 

When Red Hood slipped onto a rooftop across the road the stranger didn’t even twitch.

Pulling a small pair of binoculars out of one pouch, he also pocketed a small handheld device that was connected to the tracking device he had managed to slip into the folds of the black rubber hazmat suit the other man was wearing.

Whatever he was, and however he turned invisible the tracker had worked fine.

Wherever Jason might have been expecting this strange visitor of Gotham to go it certainly wasn’t here.

Crime Alley was one thing.

This building though was even more decrepit than the usual.

There’d been a mass murder at some point in the early aughts.

Nothing too noteworthy.

For Gotham anyways.

A drug deal gone wrong, amped up with some of the fear toxin that the Scarecrow specialized in.

Red Hood had managed to keep most of the homeless clear of the old apartment building just in case.

He’d funded several halfway houses in the Narrows and tried to keep everyone at least marginally housed and fed.

One thing about his little empire, Jason had no end of odd jobs that he was able to offer to anyone that needed some help to get back on their feet. He’d been deep in the weeds of getting a rehab facility set up for the last several months. Getting funding hadn’t been the biggest problem; if Bruce was good for nothing else he was at least usually willing to throw money at a problem.

He had also given all of his children a thorough education in business and whatever else they were interested in.

Finding good, i.e. non-villainous, counselors was proving to be tough though.

Nearly everyone with a higher education in Gotham seemed to be on a watchlist of some sort.

Anyone with common sense and a Masters degree tended to abandon the smog-filled skies as soon as they were able to graduate.

Hood didn’t feel like he was being particularly picky either.

He sincerely didn’t care about any sort of non-violent criminal history and even then it definitely depended on the circumstances.

A spouse beater wasn’t going to get into the Narrows to profit off of his little growing empire.

A girl that had killed her rapist on the other hand.

Well.

Some people got exactly what they deserved in death.

No matter what Batman thought.

Tossing his hair out of his face Jason finally knelt down to take in what he was seeing.

Oracle was quiet too.

He’d turned on the recording when he’d slipped into the sewers and hadn’t felt the need to turn it off since.

He had heard the gasp of outrage that had slipped out when she had seen the other man’s face.

Whoever had done that to him; it was malicious.

Torture on a human rights level, even if he wasn’t technically human, wasn’t going to be tolerated by any Bat or Bird.

“We’re going to need to figure out who did that to him.”

O’s voice was grim and Jason gave a grunt of agreement.

Tilting his head, Jason watched the throbbing glow of the Lazarus water as it seeped into the man’s chest.

He wasn’t going to lie, at least not to himself, that was spooky as shit.

“I’m not familiar with whatever tech or magic this guy’s got going on but I’d say he’s probably ingesting the Lazarus water to help with his injuries.”

Jason kept quiet.

Oracle was only marginally talking to him.

She was typing quickly; looking for commonalities.

Clues as to what the hell was going on with their newest visitor.

Jason’s voice was the barest whisper but he knew that the microphone would pick it up.

“How is he even collecting it? I’ve never seen the waters in this quantity in Gotham and he seems to be pulling it out of thin air.”

“I’m not picking up any sort of machinery or tech. The only metal I’m picking up is localized around his face. You tussled with him. Notice anything noteworthy?”

Jason bit his lip to hold back a bark of laughter.

Tussled.

Like they were kids on a playground.

Like the guy in front of him hadn’t managed to literally rip his helmet off of him in pieces.

At least Dick had finally managed to convince him to remove the bomb that he had stored in it for a while.

That would have been an interesting way to go out.

“You’ve been unusually quiet even for you. What are you thinking?”

“That he sets off the Pit.”

Oracle’s gasp was bitten off but Jason still heard it.

He ignored it though and plowed on.

“Not. Not in the same way that I’m used to.”

Less blinding rage and more. Jason wasn’t sure if he could explain it to anyone.

They knew about the rage that seemed to envelope him.

It didn’t always have a trigger; just came out of fucking nowhere to ruin his goddamn day.

Sometimes though.

Sometimes it was worse.

The scrape of metal on concrete seemed to be a pretty consistent one.

Green flooded his vision and he could feel that seemingly endless well of rage start to rise in his chest.

If he was in the manor or the cave he always tried to keep well away from everyone.

Jason didn’t know what he would do to himself if he somehow managed to hurt Alfie.

That strange feeling of fear mixed with curiosity had seeped through him like a warm mist.

A hiss from a frightened animal not a roar of intimidation.

Not a hint of malicious intent; even after that frankly epic blow to his mask.

The Pit had risen to meet it, enraged and tinted with his own fear, and then had paused.

Writhing in his chest like a physical being.

Like a heart attack made of magic.

And then.

A feeling he had never felt before.

A deep rumbling purr of recognition.

All of this in the span of moments while he had watched the other man try to catch his breath.

All of it a silent undertone that felt like an alien language that he had never heard before but that made perfect sense.

“I can’t explain it. I’ve never experienced anything like it before.”

“Can you make a comparison? It doesn’t have to be perfect. Just, I’m trying to understand what you’re saying.”

Jason went silent for another long moment.

His eyes were still fixed intently on the other man.

Who definitely wasn’t breathing.

That fact didn’t seem to bother the stranger at all as he twisted into a deeper curl.

His entire body was molding to the shape of the used to be 90° walls and the man was about 70% cube.

Jason bit his lip hard enough that he could taste the faint tang of imminent blood.

What could he compare this feeling to?

He stumbled over his words for a moment, wetting his lips.

“It’s not…not quite the same. You remember the first time Martian Manhunter telepathically communicated with you?”

“Yes?”

“How it wasn’t just words.”

“Yes. There were undertones of his emotions too.”

“Right. That’s kind of what this was like. No words. Just emotions. Communicative emotions. He knew what he was doing and had some control over it.” “

So you felt his emotions but they weren’t just pressing into you the way the Martian’s sometimes do. He was using it as a form of communication that he had control over.”

“Yes, exactly.”

Jason nodded, even though he wasn’t sure if Oracle could actually see him through her cameras.

“I think he could understand what I was saying.”

The man’s sarcastically cocked eyebrows had also heavily implied that he understood what Jason was saying perfectly.

And that he was unimpressed.  

“He just couldn’t verbally respond to you because of that horrible muzzle.”

“Well that and I think I really pissed him off when I grabbed him.”

“No.”

Oracle’s voice is only a little dry.

“A person who doesn’t enjoy being snuck up on and grabbed from behind by a total stranger. Call Ripley. I can’t believe it.”

This time Jason snorted softly. He had always loved those Ripley’s Believe it or Not books.

It wasn’t Shakespeare by any means but he had always laughed a little bit at the sight of the monkey and fish body’s that had been put together to make a ‘real mermaid’.

The tv show was fun too.

In the right light the tv host, (Dean something?) had even looked a little bit like Superman.

Nowhere near enough jawline, but the resemblance was there.

Jason huffed the white patch of hair that hung over his forehead out of his eyes as he came to a decision.

“Listen. The tracker obviously worked. I’m just going to leave our guest a little present and then leave him alone. He hasn’t hurt anybody and he definitely could have knocked my whole block off if he had wanted to.”

“Okay, Hood. I’ll pass this along to everyone.”

As though B hadn’t probably been metaphorically champing at the bit and listening to the entire conversation.

The man was busy; but meta’s put his back up for some reason and he had been a little (psychopathically over-protective) of Jason ever since his miraculous return.

The man had also been trying.

Trying so hard to make up for his past mistakes with Jason and his other children.

A part of that was that he had basically ceded control of the Narrows to Red Hood.

Gotham at large may have been the Bat’s territory but all of his children had started to break it into pieces for themselves.

Nightwing was in Bludhaven, but Bruce’s adoption ‘problem’ was rampant enough that the others had managed to create their own sectors within Gotham.

Batman’s grip on the city hadn’t loosened as he aged but he had started to place his trust in his proteges.

That trust did not extend to keeping his nose out of everybody’s business but at least he had learned to occasionally keep his mouth shut.

Danny’s eyes were a little bleary when he opened them up as the sun slowly crept towards his dark little corner.

It took him a second to focus on the object that someone had placed in front of him.

He could feel the muted presence of the other ghost at the edge of his senses.

Long gone; but apparently fully capable of sneaking up on a (more dead than usual) Halfa in his sleep.

The bolt cutters looked to have been coated in rubber and were a matte black that looked expensive. There was a little note placed jauntily on top of the tool; the paper folded in half so it would stand upright.

THIS IS GOING TO HURT LIKE A BITCH. HOPE IT HELPS. RH

The handwriting was blocky but dark with good quality ink that hadn’t smeared or blotched even with the obvious haste that the note had been written.

Danny let his tail flick out and gently tip the note over so that he could look the tool over with more care.

Even with the rubber it was definitely going to set off that satanic little metal plate that was on his tongue.

The man was right. It was going to hurt like a bitch.

He blamed his exhaustion for why he hadn’t gone out and stolen something like this for himself though.

His brain had been too foggy and his body too damaged to try and figure out how to do anything except find somewhere to go to ground that he would be able to pull the plasma out of.

He felt healthier than he had in a long time after his impromptu nap/meal.

It was still going to be dangerous to do this.

If he hadn’t been able to feel the flood of emotions from the other man Danny might have hesitated.

Humans lied.

They lied all of the time.

The man could have coated the cutters with something nasty.

But it didn’t feel like something the man would do, somehow.

Danny reached a trembling hand out to the cutters and reluctantly pulled them closer. They were sturdy. Heavy-duty and hopefully capable of cutting the sutures and metal bars that wound through his face.

He took several deep breaths as he thought about how he was going to manage this.

The bars that went through his lips were close enough to each other that Danny was able to get two of them at a time between the blades of the clipper and he pushed down hard.

There was a moment of triumph when he felt the click of metal separating before his face lit up again with electricity and he writhed on the filthy carpet for several long moments waiting for the metal plate to stop shocking him.

It was lasting a lot longer than he was used to though.

It was hard to think through the pain and it took Danny several long seconds to realize that there was probably some sort of a failsafe on the tech that meant that if he managed to break any of the connections it wasn’t going to stop shocking him.

His whimpers were muffled as the remaining bars still kept his lips fused together and his hands clenched hard into the carpet and missed the handles of the clippers a couple of times before he was able to bring it up in fits and starts to clip the next two bars.  

Thankfully they split as easily as the first two but Danny was starting to smell burning flesh and acrid smoke tickled his nose as the tech fought against his attempt at freedom.

Two more to go.

Then he could hopefully pull the metal plate out of his mouth and the staples would be cake after all of this.

Horrible.

Bitter.

Poisonous cake.

The last two gave way at the same time as Danny lost consciousness. The plate sputtered out with a sullen click and Danny let himself slump down onto the floor and let the darkness take him.

At least there was enough ectoplasm to keep him going in this city even if he wasn’t conscious enough to reach for it.

Batman let his muscles slowly unclench as he watched the boy through his binoculars.

He hadn’t known if he was going to be able to stand by and just watch for much longer.

The glowing Lazarus water had started to slip back out of the carpet as soon as the meta had collapsed back into it.

The Narrows and Crime Alley were Red Hoods; but Batman was never going to leave his boy behind again and if this new boy, young man perhaps, was going to be a denizen of Gotham he deserved every bit as much of his protection as the rest of the population.

More than that, he needed to contact the League.

 Whatever sort of monsters, human or otherwise, had done this were going to pay for this if he had any say in the matter.

Batman’s lips tightened a little bit before he swung away on a grapple gun’s wire.

He was the goddamn Batman.

He had quite a bit of a say. 

[poetrysmackdown]

what makes a poem a poem? does it have to be written in a certain way? is this question a poem if i want it to be?

Fun question! This is just my personal sense as an avid reader and less-avid writer of poetry, but for me it’s useful to distinguish (roughly) between poetry as a genre and poetry as an attitude or philosophy through which language and the world can be understood. And of course these two go hand in hand. I see poetry the genre as essentially a type of literature where we as readers are signaled, somehow, to pay closer attention to language, to rhythm, to sound, to syntax, to images, and to meaning. That attentive posture is the “attitude” of broader poetic thinking, and while it’s most commonly applied to appreciate work that’s been written for that purpose, there’s nothing stopping us from applying that attentiveness elsewhere. Everywhere, even! That’s how you eventually end up writing poetry for yourself, after all. There’s a quote from Mary Ruefle floating around on here that a lot of folks have probably already seen, but it immediately comes to mind with this ask:

“And when you think about it, poets always want us to be moved by something, until in the end, you begin to suspect that a poet is someone who is moved by everything, who just stands in front of the world and weeps and laughs and laughs and weeps.”

Similarly, after adopting the attentive posture of poetics, there’s plenty of things that can feel or sound like a poem, even when they perhaps were not written with that purpose in mind. I’ve seen a couple of these “found poems” on here that are quite fun—this one, for example. The meaning and enjoyment you may derive from the language of a found poem isn’t any less real than that derived from a poem written for explicitly poetic purposes, so I don’t see why it shouldn’t be called poetry.

That said, I do think that if you’re going to go out and start looking for poetry everywhere, it’s still important to have a foundation in the actual language work of it all. Now, this doesn’t mean it has to be “written in a certain way” at all! But it does mean that in order to cultivate the attentiveness that’s vital to poetry, one needs to understand what makes language tick, down at its most basic levels. It will make you better at reading poetry, better at writing it, and better at spotting it out in the wild.

Mary Oliver’s A Poetry Handbook is an extraordinary resource to new writers and readers, and a great read for more experienced folks as well. Mary Oliver’s most popular poems are all to my knowledge in free verse, and yet you might be surprised to find her deep appreciation for metrical verse (patterns of stressed/unstressed syllables), as well as for the most minute devices of sound. In discussing the so-called poetry of the past, she writes,

“Acquaintance with the main body of English poetry is absolutely essential—it is the whole cake, while what has been written in the last hundred years or so, without meter, is no more than an icing. And, indeed, I do not really mean an acquaintanceship—I mean an engrossed and able affinity with metrical verse. To be without this felt sensitivity to a poem as a structure of lines and rhythmic energy and repetitive sound is to be forever less equipped, less deft than the poet who dreams of making a new thing can afford to be.”

In another section, after devoting lots of attention to the sounds at work in Robert Frost’s “Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening”, she writes,

“Everything transcends from the confines of its initial meaning; it is not only the transcendence in meaning but the sound of the transcendence that enables it to work. With the wrong sounds, it could not have happened.”

I hope all this helps to get across my opinion that what makes a poem a poem is not just about the author's intention, and not just about meaning (intended or attributed), but also about sound and rhythm and language and history, all coalescing into something that rises above the din of a language we would otherwise grow tired of while out in our day-to-day lives.

I'll always have more to say but I'm cutting myself off here! Thanks for the ask

[nocturnowlette]

Aren't you worried about forming a cult of personality?

Group hypnotherapy, mediated especially by a single individual, seems to encourage that kinda parasocial following.

Mix that with personalised sessions with multiple people, possibly seen as lovebombing. Elevating your audience to the idea that they're a mutual, when they're not even close to your personal life.

Why not just point to a larger, more professional hypnotherapy server? Such could guide the individual to somebody that may be better equipped for them personally, and constructive yet critical peers for yourself and other hypnotists.

It could offer other methods (including non-hypnotherapy ) that could guide individuals to heal faster.

Imo, it's a lot healthier when attention is spread out mutually, and treatment exposure is not at the whim of a subjective personality.

And if just a group, not primarily about hypnosis and more about your explorations of it, then you should post that kinda stuff to your channel instead so the video can receive feedback from hypnotherapists, and it'll be able to be seen by everybody, not just the people in your server, and you can just do puppy stuff there. As long as it's all safe and doesn't form unhealthy bonds that prioritise escapism over wellbeing.

You seem confused on what this server is.

Firstly, it's not hypnotherapy at all; it's a recreational hypnosis server. I, in fact, actively discourage anyone who is not a professional therapist (let alone hypnotherapist) from attempting to serve that role to someone else. Many hypnotists who just start out see conditioning as a hammer and every emotional problem as a nail, and I shut that down immediately.

You also seem to heavily overestimate my role as the server leader. If we were to quantify activity of hypnotists in the server, I likely would not even be in the top 5. I've largely lost my interest in regular hypnosis sessions for the last few months and serve mostly as the teacher and guide, as well as just the administrative server owner.

This server is not even about hypnosis so much as it is a community server that has hypnosis as a binding topic. If I were to give a topical split of how much it's talked about versus everything else, I'd say that it composes less than 10% of all discussion in the server. Therian/puppy stuff takes up slightly more than that, maybe 20 to 25%, then the rest of the server is nerds talking about their interests and having fun.

Any emotional progress made in the server is consequential and due to the place letting people feel safe to be themselves. Such a thing does seem to help folks quite a lot, but no active therapy is being done, and we encourage folks to actually seek therapy among other things.

My role as the server owner is largely due to necessity. I've always found myself at a lack of communities that actually suit me, so I've always had to make them myself. I quite dislike being the leader and much like with hypnosis, I actually prefer being on the lack-of-power end and not the super-in-power one. I'm a subject far more than a hypnotist.

I'm selective about who joins because every single server member to have caused issues and then left joined the first day of the server before there was a member cutoff. This place simply won't work for the majority of people, and the people who are let in are ones that would benefit from it.

On to the other topic, I trust therapists who know some hypnosis, not hypnotherapists. Hypnotherapy has been infected by quacks who know next to nothing and is, by almost every measure, a community destroyed by scientific mysticism. It is maybe the worst representation of hypnosis in our world and at best is hardly helpful, while at worst is actively destructive.

Every hypnotherapist I've met has been woefully knowledge-less on the actual functions of hypnosis and how it works, and seems to only know how to do the specific things they're taught. It's the difference between memorization and understanding. They were chewed up and spit out by the pseudoscience factory and think they know anything.

I have no intentions to ever be a hypnotherapist because it is not even close to the best method of processing any emotions whatsoever. I like hypnosis as a hobby, a way to have fun with people. If you want something similar that is more helpful, look into Gestalt therapy.

[xkseii]

⎮Just One Drop⎮

⏤ Characters: Sakusa Kiyoomi⎮reader

⏤ Including: nsfw (-17)

⏤ Warnings: vampire! Sakusa, bottom! Sakusa, top! Male reader, implied athletic/tall/buff! Male reader, blood mention, injuries, virgin Sakusa who almost never touches himself; may do a part two. Not proofread, I have no brain for that, this whole fic is a mess ngl-

⏤ Summary: Finding your mate and sharing a bit too strong bond.

⏤ 6.400 words

Itachiyama, a private school in Tokyo, and somewhere you dreamed to go to.

It was known to have a lot of athletic clubs, the best equipment, support for the students and a foreign exchange program. Though it was available every year, not many students had the opportunity to get accepted, as it was extremely selective.

And it was because of its same exchange program that you got the opportunity to join this school for, at least, a year. Possibly more if you proved yourself good enough. This opportunity was the greatest you could have. You were currently in a public school, which wasn't bad in itself, and you liked it, but knowing that you could spend a year somewhere much better, who were you to not take this chance.

The program was offered only for students that were part of a sports club, had good results and were recommended by their teachers. Though, this part did not matter much, as it was only showing how much you were valued.

Thankfully for you, and your hard work, you ended up fitting in with their requirements, more or less without surprise. Compared to Itachiyama, your school didn't have much money to spend on clubs, and you couldn't enjoy the sport as much as you wanted to. But with this program, you may be able to train with a real coach, learn more, and know how it feels to have a real team.

So, without any more hesitation, you accepted to leave your country for Tokyo, along with one of your friends.

And only a month later, you were on a plane, going to Japan and joining Itachiyama Institute as a third-year student.

Without any surprise, you were welcomed nicely by some teachers and a few students, which were all more than kind and lovely. There was no doubt that the school chose the calmest and sweetest student to give a good image from the start.

That's how you met Motoya Komori, another third-year who was in the volleyball club, and he quickly became a good friend. The next day, he took the time to show you the city, explaining how everything was working for your first days here, and the time spent helped you to bond together and create a great friendship.

Perhaps it was a surprise for you, but all the students from the exchange program including you became rather popular, as you were for most foreigners and athletes, you fitted right in the standards of this school.

Fortunately, everything was going well. Your first month has been perfect in every way. Despite now living in a whole new country, and only knowing a bit about it, you manage to meet multiple people, get a few friends, some close ones too and joined the club you loved the most.

Unsurprisingly, you weren't the best player here, as you did not get the opportunity to have a coach or a clear routine before. But now, it was the moment to enjoy and improve yourself, you were still an over-average player and training with a good team could only help you. A strong motivation takes over, wishing to become better and be a regular.

As days passed, you gained some habits from this new lifestyle, as every morning you spend time with friends from your class, and then for the rest of the day, you would be with your club members or Komori and his friends, now yours too.

For a reason that was unknown to you, Komori was always busy in the morning and couldn't be with anyone, same for when he was finishing his practice with the volleyball club, he never had the time to do anything after. You never tried to pry into it, as it wouldn't be respectful, and it was normal for him to have things to do. Simply, you just grow curious about why he was so secretive about it, though, you did nothing to find out.

Honestly, you forgot about it for a long while, until you saw him one morning walking into the school, a guy next to him.

This someone was surely a third-year too, they seemed really close, and you couldn't help but feel curious. This unknown person, you guessed was a man with the name Komori pronounced, was rather attractive, also catching your eye by how different he was from your friend.

Komori was someone always joyful, excited, extremely friendly and liked by most people, while this guy was the complete opposite of what you were seeing. He was wearing a mask, no sign of happiness could be found on his face, nor any other emotions except annoyance and tiredness.

Compared to your friend, he was not greeting anyone, not talking or barely a full sentence while replying to Komori, and would not try in any way to interact with any person, or simply ignore everyone. You had no clear idea of who he was, or what was his full name, but he managed to stay in your mind for a long while.

In the following days, you would notice him everywhere you were going, unable to ignore him or not recognize him from afar. With his black curly hair that looked extremely soft, the mask he was wearing, hiding his features except for some, like the two moles on the right of his forehead, and his aura, he was easily seen.

It was driving you crazy. 

How effortlessly your eyes were drawn toward him. There was no reason for it that you were aware of, but it was as if something was enchanting you toward him. 

You still did not know who he was, and yet, he was occupying your mind, magnetic and hypnotizing for you, catching your attention and poisoning your mind. For no reason, you couldn’t stop thinking about him and especially did not want to think about him particularly. It was a strange and bothersome feeling, being thrown toward someone so hard, but not even knowing anything about them that could explain it all. 

Days passed, and this odd attraction did not stop one bit. The most frustrating was that you were the only one sensing it, never once, he looked at you. Though it should be normal, something inside of you was annoyed to not end because of this. After all, you were nobody for him, and he was nobody for you. 

Thankfully for you, the next week, you never saw him once. And so, you almost forgot about him until today. At lunch, as you were eating with everyone and joking around, talking about the last practice or your classes, Komori suddenly started to act strangely. He would blush and stutter while talking, which was far from his usual self. You saw how most were sending him a sweet smile and motioning for him to say something, leaving you confused. 

For some more minutes, he stayed silent, looking blankly at his empty plate, until his head suddenly shot up. With a bashful grin, he offered you to come to his practice this afternoon, to watch him and maybe do something after together. In amusement, you watched as his cheeks turn a deeper shade of red, Komori looking away in embarrassment at his sudden outburst. 

As curious as you were about volleyball and what Komori’s practice looked like, you accepted quickly, as refusing was not an option for you. And genuinely, you never saw him brighten up this quickly, his smile was blinding, to say the least, it could be compared to the sun at this moment. Komori looked so excited and happy that he was jumping on his chair, the others looking at the two of you amused. Soon enough, it was time to go back to class and after patting your back, everyone left after the bell rang. 

The hours passed rapidly, you barely even remember when you started the second class of the afternoon, or when the bell rang and everyone left, either to go home or to their club. At this point, you were moving on autopilot, noticing last second how you were standing in front of your gymnasium and not the volleyball team’s one, making you sigh. 

You walked alone to the other gymnasium, making sure it was the one Komori told you about, this time, before going in its direction. Carefully following the path, you look up a split second from your phone, and you see him. Here he was, waiting outside the building with his back resting against the wall, the same man living rent-free in your mind for more than 2 weeks. 

Thankfully, he was too busy on his phone to notice you pass by him, you opened the door in haste and entered the gymnasium. Even though you only saw him for some seconds, the sudden pressure you felt before the door closed behind you sent shivers up your spine. Your hands were still shaking as your body was screaming at you to run away. You took some seconds to inhale deeply, calming yourself down to not cause a scene before stepping forward. 

As he was quietly waiting for Komori, Kiyoomi was pulled out of his thoughts by the sounds of steps going toward him, he already felt annoyed, sure that he was one of his teammates. Turn out he was wrong, as the person did not even stop, and thankfully, only passed by him without a word.

But then, it hit him, the sweet scent he has been smelling continuously these last weeks. His grip around his phone tightened, all his muscles tensing as he resisted the urge to just yank you toward him and feed. It was such torture when he felt your eyes on him, only wanting to look back at you, but you kept walking as if he wasn’t there. 

He barely had the time to look back before the door closed behind you, the view of your nape and shoulders, along with the shape of your upper back graved into his mind, making his mouth water. He tried so hard to find who was smelling so sweetly for weeks, to no avail, and here you were, showing up like it was nothing. How could you not be aware of him and what you were doing to him, it was insane. 

He was tempted to run after you, just to get a longer time to enjoy your smell, but sadly, his cousin showed up at the same. And unfortunately, he was forced to push to the back of his mind his thoughts about you, or everything that he imagined he could do. Rapidly looking suspiciously at his cousin as he seemed much happier than usual, and then, when a smelled a whip of your smell on Komori, his eye twitched. Did you two know each other? 

Kiyoomi couldn’t help but wonder what was making you so attractive. Perhaps it was your scent, the sweetness of your blood, or how you were cleaner than the rest, the remaining scent of your body wash and shampoo still on you, even after a long day. He knew it sounded creepy, but his need to feed was taking over his senses, and something deep within him was calling, craving for you. Despite all his efforts, he couldn’t help but fantasize about you. And knowing that his cousin could be close to you, made him feel especially annoyed for an unknown reason. In the end, you were always on his mind. 

Stepping inside the gymnasium, you were thankful to recognize some players, you took the time to greet some of them whom you knew through Komori’s acquaintances, before sitting in the bleachers. At the same moment, Komori and the guy from earlier came in, one looking overly excited and the other annoyed to no end. It was strange how he looked so upset but also so close to your friend. 

Someone from the team yelled “Kiyoomi” and you watched as the man’s head shot up, sending a death glare to the too-joyful player. It seemed like your guess was right, he should be a third-year too since the player called him “senpai”. Though you were only sure of his last name and age, and still knew nothing more. At least, it’s a good start, maybe if you learn more about him, you’ll manage to get him out of your mind, as ignoring him was not working. 

Soon enough, the practice started, and you tried your best to find and watch Komori. Despite your efforts, trying so hard to focus on your friend, your eyes were always drawn back on Kiyoomi, each movement hypnotizing you. 

You couldn’t help but observe him with curiosity, almost forgetting about Komori, that was looking over you at that moment, disappointed that your eyes weren’t on him. In silence, he followed your gaze, curious about who you were so focused on, only to find out that you were watching his cousin. He felt his heart being crushed when he saw you with the eyes of someone who was a bit too interested in someone that was not him. 

What pissed him off the most, was how Kiyoomi was acting. He seemed nervous, and clearly destabilized because he was feeling your eyes on him. The light blush on his cheeks was even more annoying, especially when it worsens after the quick look he would take whenever you weren’t watching him anymore. Komori felt his patience run out, not only his cousin had to get interested in his crush, but he managed to get your attention too.

He was going to turn around to focus back on the game, too fuming to watch much longer until he saw his eyes. Komori felt his blood run cold when he witnessed Kiyoomi’s pupils shaking violently, expanding and narrowing rapidly without any control. In a panic, he called a time-out immediately, taking his cousin by the arm, and dragging him away to the changing room without another word, leaving everyone puzzled. 

The players, despite being confused, decided to grab their water and relax until the two came back to the court. One of them, that was your friend, called you down, wanting to introduce you to the rest of the team, excited like a cute child. He quickly explained who you are, that you came because of the exchange program and were really talented in the sport you were practising. 

Without any surprise, you hit off with all of them rapidly, immediately feeling welcomed and appreciated. You could only enjoy how easygoing they were and how simple it was to have a nice discussion with them, the gloomy mood becoming more joyful and light-hearted. 

With your arm thrown over a second year’s shoulders, you relish in the good ambience, almost forgetting about Komori and Kiyoomi. Softly laughing at a dumb joke a player was saying, you felt more comfortable than ever with them. You almost did not notice your friend come out of the changing room, alone this time, looking much calmer and relaxed than earlier. 

Not mentioning what just happened, he joined the discussion as if everything was fine, standing next to you, close enough to be able to whisper some jokes about the players in your ear. Though everything was going well, you could still feel Komori glance at you anxiously, despite his calm and collected act, something seemed wrong. 

Some long minute passed before the intriguing man came back, Kiyoomi finally got out of the changing room and joined the rest of the team, just next to you. Though, Komori quickly placed himself between you and him, putting his hand on your shoulder before introducing you, making you discover that they were cousins. 

It was making much more sense now, as you could understand why they were extremely close and often together even though it seemed like one of the two did not like the other around him. 

Komori took a quick glance at you, not saying anything. Normally, you try to shake hands as a greeting. But thankfully for you, a while ago you noticed how Kiyoomi was avoiding every skin-to-skin contact with absolutely everyone. So instead, you simply bowed, hoping it was enough. 

Thankfully for you, you noticed a while ago how he was avoiding every skin-to-skin contact with anyone, so you didn't try to shake his hand, but simply bowed. You spotted from the corner of your eye how Komori exhaled in relief, knowing how Kiyoomi would have lost it if you touched him without washing your hands or putting on hand sanitiser.

Glad that the incident has been avoided without him needing to intervene, he started talking to you, being the one mostly holding the discussion going. He kept standing in between you and his cousin, pushing him to the side little by little discreetly.

You could see how it was annoying Kiyoomi, and he was starting to lose his patience. The tense atmosphere was making you feel more and more uncomfortable, the situation not getting better in the slightest, so you decided to tell Komori that they should start practising again, as they lost a bit too much time already.

He blushed in embarrassment, and apologized immediately, motioning for Kiyoomi and the rest of the team to go back on the court. As he walked away, the black-haired male was still standing in front of you, eyes piercing through yours with an unrecognizable expression on his face. And then, he left without another word, his shoulder brushing against yours as he almost gently pushed you to the side.

During the rest of the practice, the game changed as he was looking at you, and you were looking somewhere else. You could feel his eyes on you, but you tried your best to focus on the rest of the players instead, despite the burning feeling on the side of your head and neck.

You could see Komori being annoyed at his cousin's behaviour and almost calling him out in the middle of the game, hiding his anger, which was in reality jealousy and kept acting strange.

The tense atmosphere between the two was distracting, especially you that was observing from afar, and you were unable to keep track of what was happening when the two guys were staring down at each other. The other players were awkward too, and the training session was cut short, unexpectedly stopping one hour earlier than usual.

You took the opportunity to exchange numbers with the rest of the players, some of them inviting you to upcoming parties or for lunch. You enjoyed your time with them, meanwhile, Komori and Kiyoomi had already disappeared from the court. You barely had the time to see them get out of the changing room, freshly showered and dressed in their school attire as Komori bids you goodbye, followed by a short apology as he drags Kiyoomi away, whose eyes weren't leaving yours.

That peculiar tension disappeared the moment he stepped out of the building and was out of your sight. It left you shivering, a foreign urge, a nameless craving bubbling deep into your stomach, mind, and heart. It leaves you gasping for air as if something just punched you in the stomach.

The same night, as you were finally home, laying down on your bed with your eyes closed, you felt it, this other presence in the back of your mind. It was subtle, too subtle for you to make anything about it, but it was here. Though the tiredness took over your body, your mind fell into an endless void, unknowingly going straight into his trap. And then, he was here again, the same captivating face and enchanting eyes staring down at you. It was luring you in, making you step forward until you were close enough for him to grab your face, bringing you into a heated kiss.

Everything went too quickly, and before you knew it, the blood in your veins was boiling up, almost as if electricity was going through them. Your legs and core were burning up, tensed and overwhelmed by everything that was happening, this delirious dream driving you mad. It seemed so realistic, you could feel his warmth, smell him and touch him. You couldn't resist the temptation as you held into his waist, bringing him closer and sliding your leg in between his. The moan he lets out was resonating in your mind, echoing through the white void of your imagination.

Your brain was screaming at you to get away, push him and snap out of it, but you weren't able to, too focused on his lips and his taste. The same magnetic aura made your mind go blank, forgetting what you were thinking about the second before.

Kiyoomi smirked at your reaction, wrapping his hands around your neck, his nails digging into your skin to have you even closer, trapping you in his hold. One of his hands slowly danced down, tugging on the shirt you were wearing, exposing more skin as he had the opportunity to move down and gently bite your neck and shoulder.

Everything was too tempting, and he couldn't help but lick the side of your neck, searching for the softest part. He looked down at you, mouth still wide open until his fangs touched the side of your neck, and his mouth closed suddenly onto you, like a predator jumping on its prey.

It hurt so bad at first, your skin was burning, as if someone threw you in a pit of fire. But slowly, the pain subdued, a strange sensation being left behind, your pain and pleasure being twice stronger. You were confused about what was happening, while Kiyoomi was completely high on the taste and satisfaction he felt.

It was certain now, he had found his mate, your linked sensations and dreams were the proof of it. He could feel the pain on his neck as he bites you, his own hands copying you when you cup his face, trying to tug him off. Kiyoomi know how rare it is to get a link this powerful, but he didn't mind it one bit, he was not even expecting to meet his mate one day, and yet, it happened.

The only frustrating part was that everything was happening in your minds only. For now, the link was temporary and would disappear within a few days.

He needed to see you again.

He sensed you grow more frantic, desperately to get him off as now, the bite was really painful. As gently as he could, he opened his mouth, his fangs slowly retracting from your delicious flesh. The smell of your blood was still tantalizing him, but Kiyoomi needed to be patient, it was useless to rush things.

When finally the pain disappeared, you were able to breathe correctly again, fear leaving your mind. Even though it was not real and this guy couldn't harm you, the threat of sucking you dry or killing you was still on the back of your mind. Deep down, you were aware that he never threatened you, and the whole atmosphere didn't feel like he wanted to harm you… especially with how his body was reacting.

His hands were still on your jaw and shoulder, thumb softly caressing your skin, lips colliding soon after. Kiyoomi keep peppering kisses all over your neck, nuzzling against you as he enjoyed the scent of your perfume and blood.

Curious, you look down to observe him, his red eyes catching your attention. In a beautiful way, his pupils were overtaking the colour, blending into a deeper shade, only adding to the profoundness of his eyes. Despite behaving so sweetly, he looked high and mad, with remaining blood on the corner of his lips, staining his skin.

His tongue darted out, licking the blood off with an expression of pure ecstasy, swallowing with great pleasure. His lips parted to let out a sinful moan, showing off his long and pointed fangs, and the urge to taste you again get stronger.

Before he could try to touch you again though, you slapped his hand away, mind clearing up as you took a step back, putting some distance between you and him. He tried to go after you, his hand reaching for your shoulder. Kiyoomi was only some centimetres away before everything went black, and you woke up. His frustrated and disappointed face echoed in your mind as everything disappeared around you, the ground vanished and let you fall endlessly. 

You woke up after this, the fall in your dream forced you awake. You were panting and sweating profusely, your heart beating erratically, still unable to process everything that you just dreamed of. But you weren’t so sure if it was a dream anymore, as you could feel your neck burning and hurting, and after checking in the mirror, your body was covered in red nail marks. They were on your neck, clearly recently made and far too similar to the place Kyoomi was holding you for this to be a coincidence. 

You felt sick, your mind was aching and your stomach turning, as you felt as if something was missing. Strangely, you craved something but had no idea of what exactly. And to not help you with this situation, you rapidly found out that you were hard and dripping, which wasn’t something you wanted to be right now. 

Even after a few minutes, you were still in the same state. You tried to take a shower, to ignore it, watch things that you found disgusting and made your stomach turn, and not in a nice way. But despite this, after doing everything you could think of, it wasn’t coming down. Desperate, and wanting to enjoy your morning before classes, you decide to check the time, seeing how there wasn’t so much time left before going to school. 

Seriously hesitating on what to do, you knew that if you were still like this after long minutes, it wasn’t going to disappear suddenly within this short span of time. Groaning, you convinced yourself that you had no other solution, as you dropped what you were doing and went into the living room, throwing your school bag beside the door. 

And that’s how you ended up sitting on your sofa, lifting the front of your shirt and holding it up with your teeth as you pulled your pants down, stroking yourself slowly. Gradually going faster, you felt your mind go blank, forgetting about all the strange things that happened to you, unknowingly distracting someone else as you relieve yourself. 

Unfortunately for the poor volleyball player, the link between you wasn’t effective only in your dreams, but all the time, both during the day and the night. This means, that if one of you feels something in a strong way, the other will immediately sense it and share that feeling too. 

And so, while getting dressed after waking up feeling discontented by his first dream shared with you, Kiyoomi felt the powerful pleasure going through your body. That bliss coursing through your veins as much as it was in his, his mind went blank as a wave of satisfaction hit him, hard. 

His knees went weak, and he almost fell onto the ground, legs shaking as the sensations were far too powerful for him to withstand. Kiyoomi didn’t know how to feel. First, you ignored him almost all the time during school, then you ended up being pushed away by you inside your dream, and now, you were masturbating just after waking up. Did it mean that he has enough effect on you to give you a hard-on and make you lose your mind? 

Though he wasn’t able to think much longer as he felt his legs give out, the feeling was breathtaking, almost electric, as he never felt something this strong with anyone before, even with those he had a link with. 

Usually, he finds that kind of act absolutely disgusting and unhygienic, which explains why he never touches himself, except for the exception of doing it in someone else’s dream. He was never touching himself, or even thinking about it, even less about spending a night with someone. It was just a distraction. 

But, with the raw pleasure he sensed, unable to ignore it as long as you were feeling it, he could feel his resolve crumble. Your euphoria was taking over his senses, as he could almost feel you, hear you mean and grunt in his ear, imagining your voice as you murmur his name, and unconsciously, his body started to react. 

He really wanted to fight it, refusing to let himself get indulged in such a gross and odious act like this, especially in the morning. But, knowing it was you, pleasuring yourself because of him, was exhilarating, to say the least. It was maybe a unique opportunity to share something with you outside of a dream, pleasuring himself at the same time as you, as if you were the one doing it for him. The idea was so tempting. 

Fixated on what he wanted to do, he completely ignored Komori that should be waiting for him outside the house by now. He could wait for a bit longer anyway, you weren’t going to be at school early today so, there was no reason for them to be in a rush. 

Before he could move towards his bed, a spike of pleasure made him collapse on the ground. In a haste, he pulled his pants down, almost ripping his underwear off as he touched himself for the first time outside a fake reality. The simple contact of his palm against his wet tip made him whine, back arching as his body was sensitive to the point he could feel something come out already. All his muscles were tensed, and he had difficulty breathing as he was overwhelmed by everything. 

Kiyoomi barely started to move when a new wave hits him, feeling your body tense up at the same time as him, he could discern the shakiness of your legs, and almost hear the grunts escaping your lips but muffled by your shirt. Your mind was utterly blank and empty as the link became stronger, now truly unbreakable, as you were unknowingly solidifying it. 

Now, Kiyoomi was able to hear your erratic heartbeat, your unstable breathing, and how you struggled with each inhale. The best thing was the shared pleasure, Kiyoomi could feel each rapid stroke, as he would reply with a slower but tighter one, absolutely worsening your sensitive state. 

As Kiyoomi was trying to match up with your pace, something new emerged, as he felt your body tense up, your breath stopped as a strong sensation broke through your entire body. At this instant, your release triggered his own body to follow you, and cum instantly, even if he wasn’t physically ready to. 

And here he was, in the middle of his room, touching himself for the first time and coming after only a few movements of his wrist. His whole body and brain broke, not functioning anymore, as everything came to a stop. 

It was far too embarrassing. It was so lewd and humiliating, but oh-so-satisfying to have his body give out, Kiyoomi needed it more than anything. 

The thought of being connected to you, being so close to you, feeling whenever you do it, whenever you lose yourself in the forbidden pleasure. It only makes him more addicted to you, desiring to see and taste more. 

If the smell of you and your blood weren’t enough to make him lose his mind, the way your body was moving, how big you were compared to him, and how it left him so many places to bite onto, definitely did. The thought alone could bring him to new highs. He could imagine it already, how he could suck your blood out of you, slowly driving you insane, only for the aphrodisiac of his bite to overwhelm you, him only being able to bring you this endless pleasure. 

Minutes were passing, and despite his mind slowly becoming clearer, he was still frozen in place, his body unable to move. Cum was running down his shaft, onto his hand and sliding down to his elbow, pooling onto the ground. 

He was finally able to breathe correctly, enjoying the relaxed state he was in, high on the pleasure he felt not so long ago. Thankfully for him, it seemed like you only needed to do it once to be satisfied, or else he would have been passed out by the end of the second time. 

But Kiyoomi spoke too soon because he felt it again, this time much stronger, the link activating in a way he didn’t know was possible, his body moving without his consent, his hands going back to hold the tip. His hand moved in synchronization with yours, obediently following your lead even if he didn’t want it. 

He shrieked at the aggressive tempo, the pace was far too quick for him, along with the tight hold around his dick, driving him insane, he was losing it. He couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t do anything to free himself from this power you had over him. He wanted to tell you to slow down, to let him some minutes to regain control of his body, but it would impossible for you to hear, and even so, you were too lost in the headspace he forced you into. 

It was his own fault, after all, if he didn’t play with your mind while you were sleeping, he wouldn’t be here right now, unable to control his own body or mind. Everything was blurry around him, his ears were buzzing and his lower body was shaking as he tried to hold himself up, gripping the edge of his bed. 

Kiyoomi was awfully sensitive, with no stamina during this kind of play, and so, before he knew it, he was cumming again. Without a doubt, you felt it, and yet you weren’t stopping. His hand was still moving at the same pace despite having just came, and he was now completely drenching his pants, unable to stand up anymore. Kiyoomi fell to the ground, his back hitting the side of his bed as he spread his legs, giving up and leaving you to do all the work.

He knew he couldn’t stop you now, not even decrease the pace until he regain his body’s control. Unfortunately, as long as you’re in this state, you will be the one with the upper hand, and he was forced to endure it. Currently, he couldn’t do anything except roll his head back, arch his back and let his mouth hang open, letting out the most sinful sounds he ever heard made. 

It went like this for so long that he lost count, his body shaking uncontrollably. Then suddenly, you were slowing down, and he could finally breathe correctly, inhaling as much air as he could, his lungs burning. Kiyoomi thought he could relax, but something felt wrong, as he didn’t feel you finish, with no sensation similar to what he felt the first time. Were you really done? It seemed suspicious. 

As he thought this, you were breathing heavily, so close to your high, as you moved your thumb towards your tip, barely pressing your nail into the opening, sending Kiyoomi’s body lurching forward. His voice broke as a moan was forced out of his mouth, this action hurt so fucking good, the pain was addicting. His hips thrusted up uselessly, knowing he wasn’t the one in charge of the stimulation he was receiving. 

And it’s only after another orgasm that he broke down, whimpering your name out loud, begging and whining, crying, pleading for you to stop, and then to keep going, to give him more. Until finally, he shouted out something intelligible, squirting over himself, and his pants, making a complete mess as he was too drunk on these sensations to process anything. 

He humped the air, searching for you as something snapped inside of him, his eyes rolling back in his skull, his whole mind filled with thoughts of you. He hoped you were losing your mind too, while thinking about him, making a mess while hoping he could be there with you. Kiyoomi would do absolutely everything to be in between your legs, lapping at your dick, devouring your thighs and tasting you. He could offer his mouth to you, his entire body, doing anything that could make you happy. 

There were hearts and tears in his eyes, Kiyoomi knew that he needed to have you, to make you his, and have you as desperate as he was for you. It was crazy how badly he was dreaming of marking you, now, sinking his teeth into the flesh of your neck, and forcibly making you cum inside of him. Just imagining how he could drive you mad with only one bite, only a single bite and you were his forever, obsessed with his scent, hypnotized by his eyes and entranced by his body. 

He was aware that a single bite could drive any human insane, making them mad and high on a surreal pleasure. And he couldn’t help but dream of biting you countless times, cover neck and shoulders in his beautiful marks, making you bleed, tasting you without feeding. 

He could see and feel it already, how you would fuck into him harder, unable to think of anyone else but him, destroy his body until he couldn’t walk anymore. How you could make a mess out of him, and only he could bring you to an ecstasy you never felt before, become addicted to this link and sensations. 

For the first time, Kiyoomi desired someone, wishing that you could be his and only his. As his mind was taken away, disappearing into a pit of need and want, determined to make a move as soon as he can, his body went limp. 

You weren’t in a better state on the side, his numerous releases made you almost pass out by the end of it, and as you try to slow down your breathing, needing to get ready to go to school, something in the back of your mind snaps. 

You closed your eyes, and when you opened them again, you were in the same dream as before. 

⏤ Thank you for reading! I wish you a great day.

⏤ here is my masterlist & ko-fi ⏤

[myfaveficrecs]

Christmas Tradition

Pairing: Bob Floyd x Reader (Darling)

Word Count: 1785

Warnings: Pure fluff

AN: Written for @sailor-aviator's Christmas Writing Challenge. My prompt was ornaments, and I chose to do something I haven't done before. I wrote for Bob! Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone.

“Still okay to meet at 6?”

Bob smiled while reading your text knowing your Christmas tradition would change after this year. In all honesty, he should have changed the tradition a couple of years ago but he always justified why he couldn’t do it just yet. Being on different sides of the country, deployments, being with your families in different states for the holidays, work schedules didn’t align, you both were too busy. But this year that changes.

“I can’t wait, Darling.”

“Going to pick out ornaments tonight?” Phoenix asked with a smile, catching a glimpse of her WSO’s phone while walking by.

“Yeah,” he blushed but could not seem to tamp down his grin. “I put the one for tonight in the tree already this morning after she left for work. I just have to wait a few more hours.”

“How are you feeling?”

“What’s the matter Baby on Board? Going to throw up again?” Hangman gave his traditional smirk while walking to his locker. Looking around, Bob realized the whole squad was in tow in the locker room now.

“Shut up, Bagman. He’s nervous enough without you adding to it.”

“Nervous about what?” Rooster chimed in. “You guys are just going to get your ornaments, right?”

“Wait, ornaments? I feel like I’m missing something.”

“You usually are, Hangman.” Phoenix glared at the irritating pilot. She was not going to let him ruin this day for Bob.

“Every year, Bob and Darling go to a boutique in the town they are in for Christmas to pick out one new ornament each for their tree. The ornament is something that reminds them of each other or something that they did together that year.”

“Okay…and what makes today's nauseating display of affection any different from the other years?”

“First of all, it isn’t nauseating, it’s romantic. Secondly, Bob is officially making her part of the squad!”

Loud cheers and hands roughly shaking his shoulders made Bob turn an interesting shade of red, but the laugh that came out of him was pure joy. “She has to say yes first. I gotta get out of here and meet her. I’ll let you know how it goes.”

With choruses of cheers and good luck, Bob rushed out to his truck, pulling out his phone to let her know he was on his way with a quick text. The closer he got to her, the less anxious he felt. She was the only thing other than being above the clouds that made him feel completely at peace. His Darling was his safe place, his home, his heart, and his soul. She was so deeply ingrained and embedded into his skin that he would never be rid of her if he tried. She was everything and he would make sure she knew it.

Pulling up to the little boutique decked out in all the garland, lights, and ornaments probably in the whole of San Diego he saw his little Darling already waiting for him at the front door, excitement all over her face. He may have started this tradition, but she made sure to treasure it and keep it exciting. 

“There is my handsome man. How was work?” You asked, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, leaving little kisses along his jaw, enjoying the light flush that started along his neck and was gradually making its way to his ears. The little prickles of the five o’clock shadow leave pleasant tingles on your lips.

His arms wrapped tight around you, swaying you back and forth to a tune that was only playing in his own mind. “It was good, I got to try some new equipment upgrades today. They are asking for my input on how to make it better.”

“That’s because you are amazing at what you do, and I would know how precise, focused, and accurate you are.” 

Bob laughed, covering your mouth with one large hand while you wiggle your eyebrows, trying to tamp down your own amusement for his sake. “Be a good girl.”

His deep voice with that particular phrase sent lightning zaps throughout your body and straight to your core, the memory of his head between your legs this morning making your heart pick up speed. “I can’t make any promises.” You let out a little yelp when you felt a quick swat to your ass, his strong hands turning you around by your shoulders and pushing you gently through the door with a laugh.

With a chime from the alarm and a loud jingle of the bells on the door, your presence alerted the owner of the little boutique that has become a favorite of yours to come to. “There’s my favorite couple! I was wondering when you two were going to come by and see us.”

“Good evening, ma’am.” He greeted with a nod. She reminded him of his grandmother - a little rounder with age, silver streaks in her blonde hair, rosy cheeks, and round glasses that complemented her face rather nicely.

“We’ve got some good ones this year, take your time kids!” The woman pointed towards the back of the store with the large display of several Christmas trees loaded down with ornaments to pick from. With barely contained excitement, you linked your fingers with Bob and dragged him towards the display.

“Have any idea what you are looking for this year?”

“Yes! Since we have officially moved here now that you’ve got a permanent assignment, I wanted to find one that has to do with your job. Can’t be that hard to find being in Fightertown, USA, right?” You mumbled, walking around the first tree in deep concentration. Your eyes squinting the further up you looked at the tree before moving to the middle one. “What about you, what were you thinking?”

“I’ll know it when I see it.” When you looked over at him all you could see was his undying affection shining back at you. The added twinkle of the Christmas lights surrounding you both added a soft glow, bounced off the ornaments and added streaks of color and prisms along his flight suit. The smell of cinnamon, cranberries, and jet fuel made you light headed for all the right reasons. God, you love this man.

Right above his head on the tree in front of him was the perfect ornament! “There! Grab that one.” You squealed, reaching your hand out and pointing out the pilot helmet with red and green stripes. Bob shook his head with a grin and got it down for you, placing it gently into your palm. “Now you need to find yours.”

Bob’s real ornament was already waiting on their tree at home but he would gladly buy a dozen more to make sure it was always full of memories. Walking slowly around the next tree, he crouched down to see the ones on the lowest hanging branches with more clarity and immediately his eyes were drawn to a glass ball with the colors of the northern lights all around it. He immediately held it up with a triumphant smile, “This one. When we went to Fairbanks to see my sister in September, we saw the northern lights for the first time together.”

“It’s beautiful, Bobby,” you said, gently clasping the bottom of the ball with your fingertips for closer inspection. “Let’s get home so we can put these on the tree. We can put on your favorite Christmas movie and curl up under the blanket on the couch, sound good?”

“Sounds like the perfect way to spend Christmas Eve.” He leads you up to the cash register, paying for the ornaments quickly while chatting with the shop owner before walking you to your car.

The drive home was quick, and his nerves were still nowhere to be found. This was the right thing for them, he knew it, he felt it. Why didn’t he do this sooner? Why wait so long to start their ever after? 

Turning the lights on for the tree he watched as you carefully unwrapped each ornament, yours being placed on top of the tree, as far as your arms could reach. As soon as you picked up his, he wrapped an arm around your waist from behind and pointed to the middle of the tree. “How about right there, Darling? Looks like the perfect spot.”

He watched as you reached out and put the ornament where he pointed to before your whole body froze, gently holding the glass ball in place. He felt the long intake of breath that filled your chest, pressing further into his chest before letting go of the new colorful glass ball knowing it was secure. With a silent gulp that made his adams apple bob in his throat, he wrapped his other arm around you tightly.

In the center of the tree was a gold and silver ball, designed to open in the center just like a ring box. Inside there was a plush velvet black pillow holding the most beautiful thing you had ever seen.

“Darling, I want to continue this tradition and make new ones with you for the next fifty years. I want to make sure you know every single day how much I need you, how much I love you. I’ve always known you were it for me, nobody else is ever going to love me the way you do and nobody is going to be able to complete you the way that I do. I’m sorry it took me this long, and I want no more excuses. Marry Me.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement. It was a fact. It was a confident declaration. 

Gently reaching out to the custom ornament, he pulled the beautiful vintage ring from its pillowed cushion. A thin gold band held an array of diamonds. A clear and beautiful round stone in the center surrounded by another circle of smaller round diamonds. The outer row is arranged like a sunburst. He saw it in an antique store two months before while you were searching for the perfect table for your entryway. He bought it the second your back was turned because he immediately thought of you. His sunshine. His Darling.

You felt the thin band wrap around your finger and settle at the base like it was always meant to be there. You couldn’t take your eyes off of it no matter how much your brain screamed at you to turn around and wrap yourself around this beautiful man that you had forever to spend with, so you did the next best thing. Grabbing his hand tightly in your own you whispered your own declaration, “It will always be yes.”

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[lady-shadow-and-darkness]

Why not leave?

I find it interesting how almost all the higher ups in the mafia don't really wish to be there, but despite having more than enough power and resources to leave, they don't.

Kouyou has been an executive since 15 (at least), and throughout those seven years I find it impossible to believe that she never thought about leaving. In fact, this is even addressed in this manga by Mori himself, to which she just responds with something lighthearted. Her earlier escape attempt was a fail, yes, but surely she understands that things are much different this time?

It is not her capability which is preventing her, but rather her mindset. And while this also ties into her responsibility, it is also important to note that she may very well believe that she can never truly be rid of the mafia and its teachings. It took an immense amount of reassurance for her to trust Kyouka in the hands of the agency, and even then, very reluctantly.

To Kouyou, I don't think that's a demonstration to her that she can leave, but rather a reminder of what she couldn't achieve in the past. And now, she most likely thinks that the mafia's influence on her is too deep to be shed off. She says as much herself to Kyouka, who has barely been in the mafia for 2 years at that point. Imagine what she thinks of herself. I do think that her duty to the mafia also makes her stay, she acknowledges that she's an important piece in their operations and jokes that it would fall apart without her. She has accepted her role in the mafia, and knows thinks it's too late to get out.

Mori, the leader himself, despite being...well, the leader, simply views his role in the mafia as necessary. He doesn't want to be the PM boss, his life in BEAST is clearly indicative of what he actually wants (you can't tell me an 'inherently evil person' ends up taking care of an orphanage in some universe), but he knows that he is the person best equipped to handle this role. His strategy of the "optimal solution", speaks to his neutrality and general capability of remaining apathetic towards necessary events which would most likely break someone else emotionally and mentally.

This isn't to say that he doesn't have any emotions, the man has a lot of them, it's just that he's incredibly adept at putting them aside and dealing with a situation completely unbiased. Fukuzawa acknowledges in canon that despite their great differences, a common motive that they share is the well-being of their city. In fact, Mori's making a HUGE sacrifice in his life just to maintain the workings of Yokohama. That's something you have to respect.

Chuuya is more of a complicated case. A lot of people in the fandom seem to disagree over whether he wants to stay or leave, but the answer is a bit more complex than the black and white ones we've been looking at. I'll be addressing this separately later, but for now, about Chuuya : I personally think that it is both, and he has conflicting feelings on this situation.

To start with, unlike Kouyou, we actually know when Chuuya came to be affiliated with the mafia. And that in itself isn't the most ideal set of circumstances, he had just been betrayed by his friends (who essentially raised him) because of a situation clearly orchestrated by the mafia (specifically Dazai, the one person he was coming to trust and resonate with), and more or less forced to be a new recruit. From stormbringer, we know that Chuuya's incentive for not leaving came from his need to protect his friends (who had already betrayed and backstabbed him at this point) from the mafia.

Any sane person would assume that Chuuya absolutely abhors the mafia at this point, but this isn't the case. Despite having his friends' lives hung over his head, he was still able to respect Mori and what he was working for (especially since he considered his own period of 'leadership' to be a failure). He was still able to care about the lives of his comrades and underlings who were also a part of the mafia (depicted in the dragon head incident). And he was still able to remain loyal to the mafia despite the several hardships and burns he faced for it.

Aside from his respect (and possible admiration) for Mori and the mafia itself, Chuuya's a person who's really attached to his relationships with people. He doesn't just respect the mafia, he also views it as his family. He has formed bonds with Kouyou, Mori, Dazai (shhh I don't want to hear anything), Akutagawa, Hirotsu...and even Gin, Tachihara and Higuchi. I mean, is there any known character in the mafia who this man doesn't know? He probably even knew Kyouka before she left. The only exception to this is Kyuusaku, and even that is because of his attachment to people (he's mad because Q, directly or indirectly, caused the death of his subordinates). He talks about burying his subordinates personally and contacting their families, if that isn't care, I don't know what is.

I think his arc with the mafia supporting him unanimously in stormbringer helped strengthen his attachment to it, which is why we've got the epilogue of him seeing his biological parents and declaring that the mafia is his true family in that LN. It's safe to say that he appreciates what he has right now a lot. But does that really mean he doesn't want to leave? In the very same light novel, it is ALSO implied that Chuuya longs for a life outside of the mafia. Hell, we literally have a character who was dedicated to bringing him to the light. And now, there is no risk associated with it either. But he chooses to stay. Or maybe the choice was never his.

With all of that said, I think it's incredible how BSD manages to portray what it's like for someone to lead a life of crime in the dark somewhat realistically in terms of feelings. It isn't some "badass mafia person" aesthetic (even though some people interpret it that way), it actually depicts the complexities that come with being associated with a criminal organisation in a fictional setting (to the best of its ability). Literally nobody in the mafia wants to be there, they just have to be. Sure, it offers them resources and opportunities which is why they choose to stay, but as an ability user, if they don't have the choice of living a normal life with the opportunities offered to an average person, do they really have a choice about being in the mafia at all?