#i feel like a lot of my analyses are based on specific wording in the scenes i'm talking about which may actually be completely different
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there are several different translations of rgu and sometimes they make sentences have completely different meanings between them and it drives me a little bit crazy
like this moment in the first episode.. these things are both accurate insights into utena's character and motivations but they're also completely different from each other. idk which is more accurate to the original japanese, maybe it's a sentence that can mean both depending on context or something?
#utena#m#i feel like a lot of my analyses are based on specific wording in the scenes i'm talking about which may actually be completely different#in other translations and therefore kind of invalidating what i'm saying? because how would i know if i have the most accurate one
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Kiss Distance: When Feelings Can't Reach | Linguistic Analyses on Rick & Rachel's lines foreshadow for TwiYor, DamiAnya, and Marthanderson from Ch. 105.5 (PART 1)
This is gonna be a take from the linguistic + literary lens regarding Rick and Rachel's lines from Spy x Family's Ch. 105.5.
Spoilers beware.
So let's talk about the film: Kiss Distance.
On X/Twitter, all I said was my analysis senses were tingling. There was a strong linguistic and creative writing/literary devices indicating foreshadow from the movie, and this just surprisingly got attention.
So now, I'm finally addressing this specific section in a long analysis post.
I cannot stress how much I love Endo-san's short chapters. There are so many things going on in terms of literary devices, and now, I think he plays with linguistics in them. I believe that the last time he did this was during Ch. 90.1 when we learned that Ania's name turned into Anya. I remember freaking the hell out that linguistics was touched upon, cuz honestly, what manga does that? Someone is finally paying attention to linguistics in a story, and it's just further pulling me into my rabbit-hole fixation and obsession with Spy x Family.
Although the chapter is only 5 pages long, it has SO MANY THINGS TO COVER. I won't be able to do that in this post, but I DID cover the entire thing in a video analysis that you can watch here:
What I will mainly cover in this post will be the film: Kissing Distance and the characters (Yor, Anya, Becky, and Martha) watching it + post-watching it. I cannot stress the ridiculous efforts embedded in just 3 pages, so I need to divide these sections into a linguistic lens (part 1) and a literary lens (part 2).
Let's start with the linguistic lens.
Spelling reflects language association + cultural history + maybe it's a meme too.
Spelling reflects language association
At the top right corner of page 2, we've got some English texts on the movie's billboard. "Interesting" and "Entertaining" are stacked on the left while "Movie" and "Theater" are stacked on the right.
Of these words, the word that stands out the most to me is Theater. English experts recognize that there are 2 spellings of this word: theater and theatre. These spelling tell you that it is either American (theater) or British (theatre).
I'm no expert on geography, but I believed that Ostania and Westalis were loosely based in Europe. I think I read someone talk about the architecture in Berlint also reflected European style houses--I'm so sorry that I can't recall who addressed it. The wars also felt like they were influenced by WWI and WWII. But what I do know is English it's my goddamn expertise. I'm not gonna be an uptight ass about pointing out every nook and cranny of inconsistent English, because that's just a whole lot of work for a creator and his team can do, realistically speaking. If Endo-san wanted perfect control in the language he's portraying in SxF, then he would need a dedicated team of linguists to help with translations. It may surprise you but there are many variations of a language (ex: English has AAVE. It's still English but used by this group of speakers--more on this later). But this is a hell hole of work, so I'm giving him so much slack on it as well as the translators handling the translations (like, really. No hate. Thank you for your services <3).
Another caveat: the English translation may also be a reflection of the translators. Maybe they favor American English than British English--who really knows? But I digress.
I'll stick to what I already know of the Ostanian language: It's English (variety is unspecificed, feels American) + Japanese.
Spelling shows cultural history
Next, let's address that these are adjectives slapped on a movie billboard. Normally, American movie theaters do not post adjectives. They post about the movie, the actors, etc. Comments about movies theaters being "family friendly" are subtext under the current film, etc. Here's an example of a movie theater from the 1950s found on gettyimages:
So this brings me to consider that English is being used as kazari eigo which means 'decorative English' in Japanese. In Chris Broad's (AbroadinJapan) words:
"... English in Japan is most commonly used as a form of cheap decorations and prestige, or value to a product and because so few people here understand it, the companies that plaster English all over their products and items rarely bother to check that it makes any sense." Reference:
Maybe it's a meme
This chapter, overall, felt really silly. There were silly drawings, silly play on words, silly foreshadows, etc. I couldn't help but think that maybe Endo-san was throwing in something amusing in these small things (cuz he's got attention to detail). Is it:
Interesting Entertaining Movie Theater OR Interesting Movie Entertaining Theater
It reminds me of:
Endo-san does have a tendency to incorporate memes into his manga/anime. Like... was Anya's jump not a Jojo's meme...? //sweats
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I don't know if I'm severely poisoned by JJBA memes but, yeah, I saw it since the day this chapter came out. I just thought:
ANYA = DIO BRANDO
Anyway... whether it was intentional or unintentional (for this section), I love when mangakas incorporate something meme-y
2. Ricky's English Variety
This is where I went berzerk in this chapter with all of these small linguistic details. Ricky's speech says so much about him.
His introduction of himself is that he's a broken razor. Essentially, he's painting the bad-boy ML image. But he's not just any bad boy. He's a bad boy with issues controlling himself/the situation. In other words he's toxic and not good for us healing men/women //joking. However, out of all of these words, the one that stands out to me is shaddup. His speech suddenly changed because romance conflicts need to have a wall between the main couple. In this case, other than Ricky's pompadour, it's his speech. What we have here is a clash between English varieties.
To understand what is variety in linguistics, you might be familiar with these words: language, dialect, vernacular, and accent. Language is the most obvious, but dialect, vernacular, and accent can be a lil confusing to distinguish. So here's a definition and a chart I made to help distinguish them:
- Language: a system of communication that uses words, grammar, and spelling to convey meaning, languages can be spoken, written, or signed-- Ex: English, Spanish, Arabic, etc. - Dialect: is a variation of a language that is spoken by a specific group of people, such as a community, culture, or region. It includes differences in vocabulary, grammar, and how the language is used -- Ex: American English vs. British English vs. Australian English - Vernacular: is a type of dialect that's used by the "common people" of a region. It's a non-standard dialect that's spoken rather than written. Vernacular language is often made up of slang or regional terms -- Ex: African American Vernacular English (AAVE) - Accent: is the way people in a specific group pronounce words, which is also know as the prosody of speech. Prosody refers to the tone and musicality of someone's speech -- Ex: Boston accent
In Summary (a simplified version of the above info): Language is the standard language (aka what you learn in grammar class and in public speaking class) Dialect is born from language where it becomes variations of the language and adopts different grammar, vocabulary, and language use (like American English vs. British English vs. Australian English) Vernacular is a type of dialect used by "common people" and often include slang words and regional terms (think African American Vernacular English, or AAVE) Accent is a type of dialect that is mainly focused on prosody, or how a person pronounces a word (think Boston accent)
Now that you understand the linguistic terminologies, here's a fun exercise to show you what I see:
Ricky predominantly uses the standard English language in the film:
The moment a language's word has a (legitimate) spelling change, it automatically turns into a dialect (which touches on my previous topic about theater vs. theatre).
These are Ricky's English accents:
Finally, this is Ricky using an English vernacular:
POP QUIZ!
Now that you know what English variety is, can you guess which one Ricky has? If you guessed dialect, then you're half a step there. If you guessed accent, you're so close! But the correct answer is vernacular. This is because accent overlaps with vernacular, but accent stops at word pronunciations. Vernacular has accent and slang.
3. Discourse Analysis on Ricky's Vernacular
You should now have a good understanding of Ricky's vernacular, but now let's talk about why this is significant in discourse analysis.
Linguists who specialize in discourse analysis are responsible for analyzing why and how people speak a certain way. Many linguistic features are observed (lexicons, syntax, phonology, semantics, etc.) but what they share in common is who it's presented to. They're looking at the relationship between interlocutors (people who take part in the dialogue/conversation). In other words, depending on who you converse with, the way you speak is affected.
You may have already realized that Ricky is code-switching (a speaker switches between one or more languages and/or varieties) between standard English and his English vernacular.
Now, pay attention to who Ricky speaks to and when he code-switches.
We can observe in the above panel that Ricky uses standard English when speaking to Rachel. This is because Ricky has linguistically profiled her.
How am I so sure that he's linguistically profiled her? Well, because the majority of human beings unconsciously linguistically profile their appearances. Linguistic profiling does have a similar general word: stereotype. The only difference is that based on appearance, we make a split-second assumption and decision on how we talk to that person.
In this case, Ricky spoke first (exercising dominance through initiation) and used standard English. From a linguistic lens, Ricky is telling me: hey, I know I look like a bad boy, and you may have linguistically profiled me as someone who didn't have good education, which would have reflected in my speech, but I'm more than competent to use standard English. And because I can use standard English, I'm on the same equal playing field (metaphorically and linguistically speaking) as Rachel.
But then, notice the moment, Rachel tells him that she hates Ruffians like [him], Ricky's replies with an accent of shuddap (shut up). Linguistically, he's drawing a line between them. This also indicates that they're no longer on the same side before adding his threat: "I'll cut you!"
In this scene, notice Ricky's accent comes back again, but who is it directed to? An enemy or someone from his linguistic background. He uses this accent with an interlocutor of the same English variety background to make it clear to the person he's beaten up that he's speaking in the "language" that they both completely understand.
But, the moment Ricky speaks to Rachel, he reverts back to standard English. What this means is that Ricky is linguistically assimilating/aligning himself with Rachel to show that he's on her side. This can also mean that he's making himself appealing to her through discourse. On the other hand, Rachel makes herself appealing through physical means (her taste in clothing has changed--more on this under literary analysis).
In this scene, Ricky changes appearance (more on this under literary analysis) and he speaks using standard English. But the moment he loses his pompadour, guess what happens?
Ricky goes back to his true self and shows it through using English vernacular.
Rachel has never changed in her English, so she's always been true to herself. It's Ricky who goes through these changes. And it becomes a beautiful and romantic moment of a man undergoing change not only visually but linguistically.
4. Language parallel/mirroring between the anime and the manga
The fact that Endo-san decided to give Ricky an English vernacular in the English translation of the manga reflects his attention to details between the manga and the anime adaptation.
Linguistics in Anime (what you hear)
Maybe you've noticed, maybe you haven't, but Takuya Eguchi, Loid's voice actor, ingeniously incorporated different prosodic features when assuming roles for [redacted], Loid Forger, Twilight, and Robert. Catte-b covers this in her Leitmotifs in the Spy x Family soundtrack. Piracytheorist also provided a video demonstrating Loid, [Redacted], and Twilight's voices. In both posts, Eguchi's changing voice is called timbre (Catte-B and Piracytheorist have a music background). Timbre is defined as:
In other words, timbre is an individual's voice quality or vocal signature. It's how listeners can recognize a singer regardless of what song they sing and how anime watchers can identify a VA's voice by the character's name in another anime--there's just a certain quality in a person's voice that makes them identifiable.
Because of this definition, timbre is unfortunately not the correct terminology. Using vocal/voice timbre when describing vocal register, at the end of the day, is just pitch. Catte-B and Piracytheorist, however, are not wrong in their analyses. They have correctly identified one of the characteristics of speech and even provided vocal qualties (sharp, flat, soft, etc.) but the more appropriate term should be prosodic features.
I want to highlight the most important thing about prosodic features and it's the features that make it up: intonation, stress, rhythm, pitch, and pauses.
Intonation: is the variation of pitch across a phrase or sentence. > in a way, it's creating a melody when speaking. > its purpose in spoken language is to convey meaning. This is usually the case in tonal languages that require a specific pitch to indicate a word. However, in English, intonation is present when we ask a question (the last few words tend to be higher-pitched) vs. a statement which is either consistent in pitch or can sometimes be lower-pitched. Stress: involves giving prominence to one or more syllables in a word. This is achieved through increasing the length, volume, or pitch of a syllable, or by changing the vowel quality. > stress is important for helping listeners understand meaning / word class and distinguish words during rapid speech (ex: address, graduate, permit etc.) > it can be used to emphasize a specific word of a sentence (ex: Where did you go last night? vs. Where did you go last night? vs. Where did you go last night?) Rhythm: refers to the sense of movement and flow of speech. It's a combination of stress, length, and number of syllables. > mostly concerned with syllables and larger parts of speech rather than phonetic segments like consonants or vowels > important for making speech sound flow well and helps us understand what's being said > 2 most common types of rhythm in language are stress-timed and syllable-timed (English typically uses a stress-timed rhythm) Pitch: indicates highness or lowness of sound. > A person's pitch can reflect friendliness and warmth from the upper register (higher pitch spectrum) to mysterious and sexy with the lower register (lower pitch spectrum)--or at least, this is a consensus opinion that I've heard in English-speaking communities when it comes to the opinion of an individual's vocal pitch for both men and women. Pauses: a break in speaking or a moment of silence that can help add structure to the speech. Pauses have several functions: > gives listeners time to comprehend and digest the information > can be used to emphasize words or ideas > helps speakers transition between ideas > prevent rambling > can signal speech breaks, especially in languages that utilize pausing as a prominent cue > can denote high-information content
There are more prosodic features listed like juncture, loudness, duration, and tempo, but this is where it'll get too specific. Rhythm kinda already accounts for duration and tempo. Juncture is relating to annotating pauses (like indicate when a pause is greater than a certain milisecond), and loudness could kinda fall under the category of rhythm.
Timbre isn't listed as a feature, but I think it should simply because timbre is what makes your voice your voice. And because timbre is the "vocal signature", the shouldn't change--not unless you're as vocally talented as Tara Strong, who can easily change her timbre with different characters.
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Eguchi-san does, however, have some roles where his timbre does change, specifically as Shuuji Hanma from Tokyo Revengers and Kazuya Kujou from Gosick (he does have some moments when he slips back to his familiar timbre).
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Now that you have an understanding of what prosodic features are, you'll be able to hear that Eguchi-san's timbre doesn't change as [redacted], Twilight, Loid, or Robert. I believe Eguchi-san intentionally kept the same timbre for [redacted], Twilight, Loid, and Robert because they're all staying close to home. You can still recognize it's still the same person. But what changes are other prosodic features (intonation, pitch, rhythm, stress, and pauses). The following video is from Piracytheorist's post and the YouTube video is from Calle-B.
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Here are my descriptions of the 4 voices:
[Redacted] - Intonation: N/A. Japanese is not a tonal language. - Stress: vowels and consonants are even for syllables - Rhythm: slow and steady - Pitch: low register, feels like it can be the middle (makes sense since this is the voice he's born with) - Pauses: frequent pauses (also, no way in hell you can convince me to measure the mili-second of his pause) - Tone: warm and soft - Other quality(-ies): reminds me of slight head-mix dominant (60% - 70%). In singing, a mixed voice is when a singer mixes his/her/their head voice and chest voice together (you might commonly know this as belting). But with mix voices, the singer can choose to make it an even mix of both head and chest, or leaning to either more head or more chest. Twilight - Intonation: N/A. Japanese is not a tonal language - Stress: consonants, vowels, syllables, and long phrases are rushed - Rhythm: his speed is fast. it's like water gushing out - Pitch: low(est) register. This is probably the deepest voice he can go while maintaining his timbre - Pauses: They only exist when a completed thought is finished. Twilight, BREATHE, man - Tone: cold and sharp - Other quality(-ies): sometimes his low register have a bassy quality to it Loid Forger - Intonation: N/A - Stress: His consonants and vowels are spoken fast in some syllables but also have a slight elongation typically towards the last few words of a completed thought - Rhythm: fast like Twilights, but has an upbeat rhythm to it - Pitch: upper register (it's the customer service voice lol) - Pauses: It's a mix of Twilight and [Redacted]'s. He has moments where he pauses after a long completed thought. Sometimes, he pauses in between a few words/syllables. Pauses feel irregular here--like he doesn't know if he should relax of speed up (as if he's being pulled to either Twilight or [redacted]'s pause pacing) - Tone: sounds cheerful - Other quality(-ies): 80% head-mix voice. The chest voice is still there, but head voice stands out Robert - Intonation: N/A. Japanese is not a tonal language. - Stress: elongated vowels and consonants -- similar to [redacted]. - Rhythm: originally slow and drawl. But as soon as he realizes that "Robert's mission is over", he starts speaking fast like Twilight - Pitch: low register and soft - Pauses: He has similar pauses to [redacted]. There seems to be a lil bit of longer pauses to indicate passiveness (reinforce the boring image of Robert) - Tone: monotone and soft - Other quality(-ies): head voice. The chest voice seems to be absent (chest voice is perceived as the power in singing and speech) as to reflect Robert as someone who is small and doesn't have much personality (as to not stand out during this identity). This voice is achieved by keeping your voice low but above a whisper. When "Robert's mission is over", the chest voice emerges and his head voice becomes head-mix.
Prosodic features are best accurately portrayed in discourse, meaning it's exclusively for speaking, not writing. So, how can Endo-san incorporate any linguistic feature in writing? We've already answered that with the analyses above: spelling.
Linguistics in the manga (what you read)
I've already went into great detail about spelling reflecting dialect, so I won't regurgitate what I've already covered. Instead, I want to focus on the fact that Endo-san actually acknowledges and uses prosodic features to mirror the 2 mediums of Spy x Family. This is significant because it reinforces the mirroring characters between Ricky and Loid. After all, it's going to be a foreshadow. Normally, I'd talk more about foreshadow under a literary lens, but for once, foreshadow is illustrated through linguistics.
In discourse analysis, the way you speak almost always portrays your identity.
Ricky's English vernacular is his real speech. > [Redacted]'s voice is Loid/Twilight's real speech, which often came out in the presence of Yor Forger.
Ricky speaks in standard English to mask his real voice and make himself more appealing to Rachel. > Loid's voice is used to mask both Twilight and [redacted].
Ricky gives up his pompadour (the most important thing in his life--which also happens to be a part of his identity) to destroy the "barrier" between him and Rachel. In doing so, he goes back to speaking with his English vernacular. > FORESHADOW: Loid will give up one or two of his identities for Yor (it might be Twilight and/or Loid). In exchange, [redacted] will come back.
Another possible foreshadow is what Rachel says about recognizing the importance of Ricky's pompadour to him. Because Rachel is a parallel character to Yor Forger, it can be implied that Yor would recognize how important Loid's identity is to him. In a previous analysis, I mentioned that Ch. 90.1, is the closest thing to an identity reveal. When Yor carved out Anya's name as Ania, she never once questioned it. She also didn't question when she had to carve another sign and spelled it with Anya. I'm aware of the caveat in this claim, such as Yor lacking education in Ostanian orthography which is why she doesn't react.
Be it grasping at straws or not, Yor has the emotional maturity to bounce back from the shock of an identity reveal. Yes, Yor would be sad and hurt to find out that Twilight is a spy from the opposition, but she would understand. They know they're both orphans because of the war. Yor already has a positive bias towards Loid based on observing his behavior at home, in his efforts to provide a better future for Anya, regardless of blood relationship. The point is, Yor is already infatuated with him and her feelings for him will influence her compassion and understanding for the person he's become, so bouncing back from feeling betrayal (not the romantic kind) would be faster for her than Loid.
Loid, on the other hand, may have more reluctance towards accepting the identity reveal (this is also mentioned in my Ch. 90.1 analysis). This is mainly because he's been conditioned to be skeptical and overanalyzing. So, he'll definitely need time to brood and reflect on their situation. Or, maybe he just might have already reached a point where he's just tired, and deflatingly accepts the situation. He'll self-loathe himself for being Westalis's best spy only to have married a legendary Garden assassin--seeing both as a win and loss (he'd be the type to say that he should be dead right now because his identity was revealed to the deadliest enemy). The confession of their love for one another just might be the thing to smooth out the wrinkles.
Someone once commented that, technically, losing Twilight as an identity isn't technically a loss. Twilight was born from a sacrifice. Loid technically isn't a loss either since he was born as a role for Twilight to play. Which leaves [redacted]. Like the film for Ricky, [redacted]'s foreshadowed arrival is just an opportunity for him to come in full circle.
PHEW.
This was a long linguistic analysis of these few pages, and in real-time this took me 8 hours to write. I did lose a night of sleep cuz my brain hyper-fixated on writing this. Help. But we're not done yet. The knowledge that you've acquired will definitely be beneficial through a literary lens in part 2.
I'll update this post with a link when Part 2 is finished.
#spy x family#spy x family ch. 105.5#spy x family manga#linguistic analyses#linguistics#discourse analysis#orthography#English#English variations#scarlywroteathing#yor forger#anyaforger#becky blackbell#martha marriott#twiyor#damianya#marthanderson#Youtube
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Do you believe hwa is the only queer member of ateez? i’d love to know your opinion on who + why anyone else is/isnt!
I hope this won't disappoint you too much, but I am going to use this ask to put together thoughts that have been percolating in my head from all the reading I've been doing about Kpop. I may or may not answer the actual question, but we'll see how this goes as I write it out.
Gay people in America and Europe have the right to marriage and explicit laws protecting them against discrimination. Gay people in Korea have none of those things and as a consequence, nobody is out unless they're professionally gay, and these people are TINY in number.
There is a LOT of 4th Gen Kpop Idols' content that is queerbaiting, gay-for-pay, or maybe actually queer, whatever, but if you recall, my thoughts on why I think Hwa in particular is walking the line between being out and not out, but reads to me as queer was based on a bunch of different things he has said and done that seem to me far beyond the usual 'fan service.'
There's something specifically Korean about my reticence to speculate about whether someone is gay or not when they don't seem to be putting it out there above and beyond Fan Service. It has to be cultural, based on what I could find in the nine books I've read to date about Kpop, all written by Koreans from a Korean POV.
Femidology, a compilation of Korean feminist analyses about kpop content, had a whole section about how the overseas audiences definitely reads Boy Idol content as "queer." They use the English term, Queer, 퀴어, to describe this, but explain the reason for why Kpop Boy Idol content in fact is subject to Queer Hegemony like this: KPop is under pressure to prioritize 'new' and 'interesting' types of performance and content, and much of this 'freshness' can be easily mined by breaking free of Regulation Standard masculinity.
These Korean feminist scholars also state, categorically, that Fan Service involving queer-looking performances are de rigueur for Kpop Boy Idols because this is what overseas audiences demand. BoyLove stuff is effective at gathering overseas fans and helping the groups become well known overseas, they write. In short, the unspoken (by the scholars) assumption is very blatantly that BoyLove behavior by Kpop Boy Band members is simply and fully a form of marketing activity, exactly like how they used to have beautiful models in bikinis making come-hither faces at the camera to sell stuff to men. Nobody actually thought that the model was actually getting sexually turned on in real time in those ads, right?
The feminist scholars were ABSOLUTELY SILENT as to whether these Boy Idols engaging in creating BL content as marketing strategies were themselves actually queer, or could be representation for actually queer people in Korea. No comment whatsoever. Zero.
I suspect that to point out actual people who haven't outed themselves to be gay may in fact be prosecutable defamation but I am not in the mood to suddenly do legal research about Korean law right now, so if you care about this, please feel free.
The ethnomusicologist who wrote another book (음악인류학자의 케이팝하기), outlining in agonizing and precise detail about her engagement in fandom of a boyband called AB6IX, wrote a whole section on how she took to buying the same clothes as her Ult in that group because she wanted to break the 'gender norms' of being a woman in Korean society. She even goes so far as to copy out the entire lyrics of a song, "Rose Scent Kiss," that she says foreign sexual minorities have taken to be a 'Pride" song (the word 'gay' and 'queer' are omitted) and stays ENTIRELY SILENT on whether she thinks her Ult is queer, gay, gender-non-conforming, or if she thinks he meant to sing a queer pride song or anything like that. She just reports that foreigners have engaged this way with this song and NO COMMENT AT ALL otherwise, not even to say whether she thinks reading the lyrics that way is valid or if she disagrees.
The scholars who wrote Femidology pointed out that while Kpop has become a political and politicized entity overseas as being on the side of minorities of all types, the Kpop idol culture inside Korea is completely apolitical. They say that this is a source of conflict and friction between 'domestic' and 'overseas' audiences of Kpop, and maybe I'm straddling the borders of that divide right this minute.
Moving away from explicitly or implicitly feminist scholars 'reading' cultural texts, the Kpop industry survey book I read, 케이팝 씬의 순간들, said that Korean fandoms have a tendency to forbear tying controversial or sensitive issues to their fandoms, whereas overseas fans politicized and politically engaged with Kpop from the start. That book said that Kpop companies have never been swift or explicit or clear in addressing any controversies or debates, no matter which type of fan demands it. The survey book about the Kpop industry said that Kpop is a high-context society, and its culture is not to make its positions on anything concrete and obvious. The unspoken reason? Because being rigidly locked into a position makes you less marketable.
Going to tumblr to engage with Ateez fandom, because overseas fandom is much bigger for this group than domestically has been curious with regards to this issue. What I, a Korean woman receiving the content in my native language, see as just a type of dance that Boy Idols do because the overwhelmingly majority straight girl Korean fans want to see them be lovey dovey with someone but not have actual girlfriends, many Western fans seem to read (more than read - insist, and if you don't agree, attack you) as being literal (but covert?) expressions of actual gayness.
What none of the academics do is wonder WHY overseas audiences all want BL performances from Korean Boy popstars. I would ask the question this way - Have Western audience ever accepted and WOULD they ever accept Korean men as hard rock musicians, punk musicians, heavy metal musicians - ultra masculine, way-macho, very loud, high testosterone etc?
I have to ask this because there is a very long history of seeing East Asian men as simply not being as manly, as dominant, as masculine, as heterosexually virile or viable, and as sexual in general as other races of men - black, white, middle eastern, southwest asian. Throwing caution to the wind, I would say that people who want to feminize someone like Wooyoung, and deny his obvious manliness, are uncritically giving into this received racist impulse, and I find them very distasteful for that reason. ... Oh great. I just accused a whole lot of potentially innocent people of perpetuating Orientalist and Colonialist emasculation of East Asian men, OH boy WHAT A PEACEFUL WAY TO START MY WEEKEND.
To answer the actual question asked, if you're still here:
I haven't seen anything beyond what just looks like BL Fan Service by straight boys to me from any other member of Ateez. And I will also say - Seonghwa doesn't engage in this kind of content very much.
There have been instances where the guys (Seonghwa inclusive!) seem to be protesting straightness, but then, as the whole discussion above shows, they can't be out so does it count? Most overseas fans would say no, right?
For example, in their "Fridge" reality content, Yeosang tells a story about being gifted a little drink by an early fan and female classmate in high school. The ones who went to all boys' schools look wistfully jealous and say that they don't have experiences like that. Then Wooyoung says to Seonghwa, But I mean, a boy could've given you one! to which Seonghwa yells, I DON'T WANT THAT!
I have seen San loudly object, once in English and another time in Korean, to gay speculation about him. There's one where a girl told him her boyfriend thinks he's hot, and he gives her a stern look, confirms that it's her boyfriend who says this, and says, Sorry Bro! The Korean content is where Woosan visit an ex Idol or something, an older man, and tell him about the friendship tattoo they got. The man goes, "Wait, the two of you got matching tattoos? Just the two of you?? Uh, that's... strange, you guys!" and makes a face and an uncomfortable mouth sound. San, who has been respectful to the point of mutism so far, turns and yells IT'S NOT ANYTHING LIKE THAT! The caption they put in under him goes WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU IMAGINING?! (the indignation and implied outrage is very clear).
I did wonder what to make of Mingi answering the "Will you marry Yunho oppa?" question once asked of him on a live with, "Marriage between men is not legally possible in Korea," but in the highly specific context of how he speaks to his fans, it's more valid to me to read this as I am straight, and I find your imposing your sexual fantasies about me fucking my best friend who I grew up with disgusting but I can't yell at you because there are 10,000 people on this call that are all recording it and I'm aware as a savvy show biz old hand that this speculation sells tickets and albums rather than a confession that he's going to marry Yunho if gay marriage ever gets legalized in S. Korea.
As I have been saying from the start - I think it's cute and fun for people to think Matz and Woosan are actually in love and dating and being young superstars together on world tour and romancing each other on stage. Do that as much as you want. Lots of Korean girls do it too, as visible in the internet chatter. But as you (hopefully) see, there are a lot of racial and historically informed aspects of this, as well as the strange quirks of Korean popular culture and fan demands, that give me a lot of qualms if I think about it too much.
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*slightly* exploded bird primary (badger-flavored system) (unhealthy badger primary model) + rapid-fire/actor bird secondary
Hi Wisteria! I’ve been loving your thoughtful and in-depth analyses and no one else in my life is familiar with the SHC system, so it’s been hard to get some outside perspective. English is not my first language, so please forgive my grammar/awkward phrasing at times. For my sorting, I am thinking Bird primary, though I’ve considered Lion and Badger primaries. I think I am not a snake primary. I have never felt there was an intrinsic moral hierarchy when it comes to people I care about. I still care for them, but at the end of the day, I think we are all living conscious beings who deserve equal treatment, rights, and consideration.
Definitely getting Idealist primary here (Bird or Lion, and I see why you're thinking Bird. Your whole position is well-thought out and well articulated.) I will say that 'all living conscious beings deserve equal treatment' is kind of the Badger mission statement,' but when we're in generalities that big, that thought could just as easily be coming from a Bird with some Badger in their System, a Paragon Lion, or even a really expansive Snake.
I also think prioritizing your own group is often dangerous.
This bit here could describe a Snake or a Badger equally well, depending on how we're defining the "group" we're talking about here.
A Loyalist would probably say that protecting the group is the only thing you know for sure you can do well, and when things get too big and Idealistic, they become unreal, hypothetical, and unsafe. But you seem perfectly fine with that level of big-picture stuff, so I'm happy to say Idealist for you. Also, there's an undercurrent of... suspicion, directed at Loyalists.
I guess I could be a snake that only includes themselves, as I do act in self-preservation a lot of the times
That's a human thing. If someone is *struggling* with turning on the self-preservation, that's a problem, and probably a sign of Burning, or a very immature Badger.
and struggle to trust people.
That can also come from a lot of different places.
I sometimes have an attitude of turning people bad in my head as soon as they act against me, or in a way that reveals their “true character”
Honestly, this kind of sounds like it could be a *Badger* thing?
Because Badgers have opt-out morality, they will often do this thing where you're one of their people, until you break the rules (or the social contract) badly enough. And then you're out, because you're a threat to the rest of the group.
(this is often a projection) and then tend to self-isolate.
Hmmm. And now you're back to being philosophical. Distancing yourself from the emotion of cutting people off. Much more Bird.
I thought bird primary because I do change my ideas about the world and morality quite often and refine my worldview as I discover new ideas. I am also very receptive to scientific ideas and do put logic and reasoned morality above intuition.
You also seem very chill about this whole process, which makes me say Bird again. (Not Lion. The process just tends to be a lot messier and a lot more emotional with Lions.)
However, my tendency to prioritize the perceptions of the group, my need to serve a larger purpose and my desire to be useful to society do feel quite badger-y.
They do. "Prioritize the perceptions of the group," especially is a very Badger thing to say. Badgers also like being useful to the group. But 'need to serve a larger purpose' is a big enough statement that it could work for almost anyone.
What Badger and Bird have in common is that they're both External primaries. What the world thinks is important, and you care about that in a way that Lions and Snakes just kind of don't.
As for lion, I do often act based on heuristics, especially if I haven’t thought out a specific issue yet.
Yeah, this isn't lion. For one thing - you used the word "heuristics." For another, you're stressing about the way you only rely on these "well xyz worked in past" mental shortcuts when you haven't "thought a thought out a specific issue yet." Implication being that, in a perfect world, you would have time to think it out completely every time. (Birds hate having to make snap decisions.)
I can also pretend to be more rational than I am, and tend to live life in automatic mode, by relying on assumptions and facts that sound good. I think I do this less than other people, but that is still a flaw I’ve noticed.
You rely on these "automatic" shortcuts less than other people, but think that you should use them less, and feel bad that you use them at all.
I wonder if you're a Bird primary living in a very Badger community. Or the flip, a Badger living with a bunch of Birds.
As for my secondary, I am a little bit lost. I am very much in my own head and not very action-oriented, so I feel like I lack the data to identify my secondary, or I am burned and just using whatever works. I usually just use stress to motivate action and procrastinate until the last minute.
Oh, the neurodivergent special. Save the non-preferred task for the last minute, and then use the adrenaline that generates to hack your brain into getting it done really fast. Definitely not the only person here doing that.
Childhood: As a kid, I was extremely quiet, sensitive, and introverted. From early on, I remember being very artistic and curious. I would dress up and improvise plays in front of my family. I also loved to draw, write poems, walk in nature, and learn about the world (I was especially fascinated with animals). I also loved to get lost in imaginary worlds, and I remember writing fantasy stories, and believing I had magical powers or was an alien/magical creature.
When I was in school, I remember not connecting very well with my peers. I think people could feel I was different. I was soft spoken, sensitive, and I excelled at school.
I mean so far, *I*could have written this. And I'll take it all into account, but this isn't a system for describing personality, so much as it is one for describing method/motivation.
I didn’t like sports like other boys, and it wasn’t acceptable to hang out with girls, so I just kept to myself. I was already doing good in school, so I just kind of developed that aspect of my identity. I didn’t get along with many other kids and ate lunch with my teachers a lot. I still had friends, but few of them were close.
You're describing constructing your identity in a very deliberate, conscious way, which is more Bird than Badger. It's honestly Bird secondary - like this how you get Actor Bird, deliberately developing one 'version' of yourself because it's useful in certain situation. I'm hearing you enjoyed acting and costumes, and (flash forward to present day) you "pretended" to be more rational than you are. I think you might be an Actor Bird.
It was validating to be so good at academics, and to get teachers’ and parents’ approval. Even if some other kids resented it, I didn’t care because it gave me worth.
This hits every child to some degree, but it hits External primaries very hard. This could describe a young Bird or a young Badger equally well, and now I'm wondering if any of these authority figures especially Birdy or especially Badgery?
Getting good grades, being the perfect child, being “mature for my age” were a big part of my personality.
"Perfect Child" is often an Actor Bird construction. "Mature for your age" is something I usually hear said about young Badgers. Are you maybe a Bird primary, with a very Badger-flavored System? It would fit everything I've read so far.
I also knew deep down I was queer
oh thats brutal
but I eventually became really good at self-editing, and I began to embody a version of me that was acceptable. I was the successful, responsible, smart kid, and I eventually started playing football in high school so that of course meant I was straight. I fully made myself believe the mask I was putting on at that time (badger-like?). In high school, I was tired of being an outsider, so I tried fitting in. I became much more agreeable, sociable, and started becoming more popular. Honestly, it felt good to be appreciated by my peers, and I did play into the character I was projecting. I was still hyper-focused on academics, but for the first time, people actually liked me.
Okay, so I do see why you're saying Badger. Badgers (especially young badgers) can just adopt the group's identity, and lose sight of their own individuality in the process. But I don't think that's what's going on here.
To me, this sounds like it could only be Actor Bird. I know English isn't your first language, so I'm not reading too too much into the word choice... but you do refer to this "Acceptable Self" as a "character," that you "embody." Building this "mask" was a deliberate, conscious process, and it sound like you lived in this persona for a while. Also, not ignoring the fact that... it worked. Wanting to be more popular, and then building a persona that is more popular... that's not something everyone can do.
This actually makes me think of a sorting I wrote for Blackbeard of Our Flag Means Death, and the Actor Bird-specific angst of building a character, spending a little too long in that skin and then feeling that people only like you/you only have worth because of a role you play... and then becoming trapped, because your character is too simple, and it's stifling.
I eventually came to accept my sexuality and had a friendship that made me confront the lack of authenticity of the mask I was putting on. After that, I explored my authentic self while still enjoying my newfound social skills and ability to attract people.
I love that. You built a "popular" persona, and then realized that you din't have to wear it all the time.
I also started getting interested in social justice, philosophy, and politics, which made me question a lot of preconceived notions and ideas I held true about the world.
Oh that's a very Bird primary list of interests right there.
As I became more informed, ethics and morality became a big corner stone of my interactions with the world. I was always interested in finding the “right” way to be, even as a child,
This almost seems like a version of the "book fantasy," which is something I've heard from several Bird primaries at this point: "When I was younger, I wished that there was a magic book that would tell me the 'right' way to act in every situation."
but this meant I could figure out what that meant in more objective terms, and for myself instead of what adults thought. Paradigm shifts were exciting (and still are).
I absolutely love that for you. Bravo.
Family dynamics:
In terms of family dynamics, I always went along to get along. I was checked out emotionally, especially since a lot of family members would say homophobic things, and I never felt completely comfortable with them. I stuck with easy topics and didn’t go into my personal life, and I was content with the image of the golden child they had of me. Even with my parents, whom I love, I never felt I could completely be myself. This led to a lot of secrets and lies to conceal my real self. I was never that rebellious or troublesome to begin with, and I kind of acted like a little adult.
Okay. That makes sense. Sounds like you built a pretty robust Badger primary model that was useful for keeping the peace with your family. (It also sounds just, incredibly necessary.) This explains why a lot of your descriptions of your younger self read as super Badger primary to me: "little adult" "mature for your age" "farming the approval of authority figure."
I also thought a lot of their views were outdated, although I rarely argued with them. My dad had the idea he had to be strict, which was just not the best fit for me. I learned to be extremely secretive, sneaky, and find ways around the rules. I was not very wild to begin with, but I did value my freedom. I just kind of passively agreed, and then did it behind their backs.
Sounds possible you might have a little bit of a snake secondary model?
Although my dad was very sensitive and affectionate, a thing that hurt me a lot was his inability to deal with others’ emotions. I was not allowed to express negative emotions or cry, and he justified this as him being “old school”.
Ah yes. As we know, boys should only have Cool emotions, like Anger and Science. Wondering if your *Dad* might be a Badger primary, with this focus on Tradition and Rules.
This was extremely frustrating to me, as I never understood how tradition could be a valuable reason for anything, or how sticking with old values and refusing to adapt was acceptable.
A little bit of that Bird primary 'make it make sense' thing.
My mom, though more accepting of my sensitivity, was also very critical. She used the status quo to judge what I did, which was also very frustrating. If something I did was weird or impolite, she would use a kind of circular reasoning (this is bad because it’s not socially acceptable, and it’s not socially acceptable because it’s bad), which was also confusing to me.
I love that you can now identify that as classic circular reasoning.
I just wasn’t super interested in developing a strong connection with anyone in my family. I just felt that it was all too arbitrary,
Definitely don't think you're a Loyalist, because I don't think a Loyalist could do a break this clean. There'd be some sense of something... some guilt, some emotion, some residual thing.
and I was more interested in exploring my friendships with people who understood me more deeply. I felt my parents’ (especially dad’s) rules didn’t make any sense, and I wanted my freedom as soon as possible. Since I moved out, our relationship has been a lot better, though I still hide aspects of my life from them.
Very true that just not needing to be around your family 24/27 makes things so much better and easier to deal with.
Problem solving: In terms of problem solving, I like to think I am strategic, and a good contingency planner. I generally understand things well, and how they work together, and am quick to find a solution. When thinking about solving a small problem, I will usually think of the “goal state” first (i.e., what is the ideal I am trying to achieve in this situation). Then I can break down what I need to do. This usually starts with evaluating resources at my disposal (i.e., time, space, material, or mental resources), and what is in the environment. Then, I can come to a solution implicitly by connecting the dots. Finally, I will mentally play out the situation and see if it works, or if there are any roadblocks. This all happens quickly though. Planning is fun, but so is throwing away the plan or finding a clever way to get out of the situation.
What a fantastic breakdown of how to solve a problem. It's also extremely Bird secondary. If it happens fast enough, and you're comfortable enough with it, it looks like it even gets into Rapid-Fire Bird territory (probably why I was getting a little Snake secondary energy up there, Rapid-fire birds can look extremely Snake.)
Am a little bit side-eyeing your decision to call yourself "not very action-oriented" up there. You seem perfectly comfortable with problem-solving to me.
Whenever the unexpected happen, the path becomes really obvious to me. Priorities become salient, and things that are useless fall to the side. It’s more in situations where I’m forced to make a controlled decision that I’m a nervous and indecisive wreck.
Bird primaries HATE making snap decisions.
I can get stressed out if there is missing information, or if the expectations aren’t clear. Travel is especially stressful because of the number of unexpected events that can affect the rest of the trip.
I mean, no one likes missing information or unclear expectations. But it really gets to Birds. (Both primary and secondary honestly. and I'm really thinking that you're a Double Bird.)
With all the information, even if it’s bad news, I can manage and find a solution. But my brain will keep spinning scenarios if I don’t know for sure. Even at school, uncertainty was always worse than bad news.
I hear this. It really goes back to that classic Bird primary fantasy: "but I want to know EVERYTHING"
Not knowing where I stand with someone, with a group, or with a supervisor also makes me nervous. I like knowing what they think of me and what people need from me so I can provide it (or not bother if they dislike me for no reason).
I do think that you have a Badger model, or a Badger flavor to your system. Honestly, you very likely have bOTH. You took in the parts of your parents worldview that made sense to you: it IS useful to know what people want from you, and to know that you aren't making any social faux pas (that way, if someone is acting weird at you, you know it doesn't have to do with you.) But you also have this much more performative Badger model: this is who my parents expect me to be, I don't agree with it, but I can put it on and let it run.
In terms of interpersonal problems, this is where I am most terrible. I am often an absolute doormat and will not vocalize problems and internalize everything. My issue is that I don’t feel confident that I am right and doubt my ability to argue my point and stand up for myself without absolutely ruining the relationship.
Unfortunately, I can't say I'm *surprised,* since you grew up in an environment where arguing was very frowned upon, and it's not like you can win an argument with someone depending on circular arguments and logical fallacies.
You also built a large part of your *identity* around this Perfect Child, Invisible Badger who just does not cause problems. In the language of this system, you built a very intense Badger primary model as a coping mechanism, and now it's run out it's usefulness... but is still hard to punch through, because old models get sticky.
If something bothers me, I will mull over it and eventually let it go because it becomes too late.
Okay, *this* is why you thought there might be some Burning going on. There's this aspect of the way you relate to people that just feels very unsafe, and so you... shut it down.
I think the problems here are uncertainty, and lack of control. When I am in a situation where I know all the elements, have resources, and plenty of time, I am good.
That is absolutely Textbook Double Bird. But (as I'm sure I don't have to tell you)... it's also a fantasy. Very often, you will be lacking in either resources, info, or time. This is why a lot of Double Birds build models, or look like Lion secondaries whenever they don't have time to prep.
If there is an unknown, I can’t do anything.
In the language of this system, that's a Bird primary that's Exploded a little bit, this idea that you can't possibly act if you don't have all the information. It's very Chidi from The Good Place.
In social situations, I can’t control the volatility of relationships or other people, so I just control my reaction.
Pretty much all you can control, so good.
Often, instead of doing something when something is bothering me, I will basically force a paradigm shift to see the situation in a better light, and then move on.
Bird primaries are known for the superpower of just being able to *decide* to like something, or *decide* to be interested in something. That is absolutely what you're doing here. It's *a* way to solve that problem, I guess. But it doesn't seem to make you feel free/powerful.
I kind of have an addiction with the process of solving, and an intolerance for doubt. When I was questioning my career choices, I would reflect on all aspects of my personality, of my goals for the future, I would take endless career quizzes, read the descriptions of jobs over and over, would ask my friends what they thought I should do, etc. I would run in circles, never deciding. I even started deconstructing the philosophy of work, to determine if it was even possible to make a good decision.
Very Bird. Very *exploded* Bird. Of course you went from "what job do I want" to "is the concept of work philosophically moral."
Other questions: My future plans is to live a relatively quiet life out of the public eye, surrounded by books, and having plenty of free time to research or practice my hobbies. I want a stable job, with money so I don’t have to think about those things, and I want to be intellectually stimulated and to be able to add value to the world in the best way I can. I want two dogs, a partner who is fine with my need for space. I also want to live in a walkable city that has an interest in art and culture, and access to nature.
That sounds lovely.
Mostly, I want to be satisfied that I am a good person and be able to do what I want with relative freedom. Now, to be honest, I am very unsatisfied about the real world. It seems so monotonous, and I have always had the secret desire to escape into a fantasy realm. Unfortunately for myself, I don’t believe in the supernatural.
It gets better. There are a lot of cool things out there, and it all gets much less linear once you leave school. I would probably say though - knowing you and your tendencies - maybe a little less focus on being a good person (because that's a can of worms) and maybe a little more on doing things that are a net positive to the world around you.
I feel most powerful when I surprise myself. I once prepared for a grad school interview by reading hundreds of questions and preparing answers for them. When I practiced with a friend, it just came out forced and clunky, and I found myself trying to repeat exactly what I had written. I had accepted I just wasn’t going to get in. When I went to the actual interview though, I just went off script and took risks. I told personal anecdotes while maintaining the image I wanted to project to them, which got me an offer.
You are absolutely a Rapid-Fire bird, which is very cool.
When I speak up in class, when I stand up for myself, when I make impulsive decisions, and especially when I do something scary, I also feel this way.
I like it. Lean into that Lion secondary energy. I know a lot of Birds, especially Double Birds, find it extremely helpful.
I also feel powerful when I feel competent. For instance, when I fix issues at work, when I get good grades, when I manage to problem solve in a clever way.
All of this is very Bird secondary. And honestly, a very effective-sounding Bird secondary.
In high school and during the pandemic, I also was obsessed with personality systems and would read and introspect for hours trying to determine my type. But there was never an answer satisfying enough because the process of introspection was the addictive part of it, and even a sliver of doubt would send me into another rabbit hole. There is a kind of poking at it until it becomes mush effect. I literally made excel sheets with my results on different quizzes, over multiple weeks, to see if there was a pattern. By focusing so much on figuring out who I am, and the intricacies of my own psyche, I just end up losing the big picture and not being able to contextualize the information I’ve gathered. Sometimes it even becomes hard to identify anything since I’m focusing on such a tiny part of myself, and the human mind is so kaleidoscopic and changing, so it stops making sense and just becomes a big blob of behaviors and thoughts. I’ve had a hard time figuring out my MBTI and enneagram because of this as well.
I have been there before, trying to navigate the difference between what is useful introspection and what is navel-gazing indulgence. I accept that people are incredibly complicated, and any categorization system is inherently imperfect. I also accept that words to describe your inner workings are extremely helpful, and honestly, necessary. One thing I like about the system is the cleanness of it. So much of it has to do with cutting through the noise and the *presentation* we are presented, and just going - okay, how do we work, why do we work?
Thank you to Lorangutan for such an excellent submission. If you'd like a Sorting of your very own, commissions are open on my ko-fi. :D
If you'd like to read more about the system I'm using, my explanation is right here.
#shc#sortinghatchats#sortme#wisteria sorts#double bird#bird primary#bird secondary#exploded bird#actor bird#rapid fire bird#badger primary model
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Hey, I know you probably don’t let those hateful people bother you, but I just wanted to say something anyway. I really think you’re an amazing person and super smart, and I’ve learned so much from your blog and your fics, both about AoT and Levi specifically and also life in general. Because of you, I’ve become more aware and understanding, especially about stuff like disabilities and how ableism shows up everywhere. Honestly, I used to be clueless about all that. I didn’t even realize how common ableism is until I started reading your work. It’s awful seeing people attack you on your blog all the time just for writing about Levi’s disabilities. You’ve also taught me so much about trauma (sexual trauma in particular) and mental health. I’ll admit, I used to be really judgmental about eating disorders, especially anorexia. I thought it was just about vanity or being picky with food. I’m ashamed to say that now. I didn’t get it AT ALL. But your writing changed that for me. On top of that, the way you write about Levi’s struggles with his sexuality really hit me. I grew up in a place that’s super unkind toward queer people, so I relate a lot to how Levi feels in your story. It’s terrible that people accuse you of “hating straight women” just because you write Levi as queer. Anyway, I just wanted you to know how much your work has impacted me. And reading your analysis posts on your blog has helped me come away with a better understanding and appreciation for AoT and Levi as a character. Don’t let these unhinged haters get you down! And as a side note, some of your anons and haters need a reminder that fiction is, well, fiction lol I love seeing my favorite characters struggle and suffer because it’s cathartic. There’s a reason angst, whump, and hurt/comfort are so popular. That doesn’t mean we love the character any less. Keep doing what you’re doing!
Hi there! First of all, thank you so, so much! Your words are incredibly kind and I honestly found myself smiling reading them. To know my writing, whether it’s been my fiction or my analyses, has helped you in any way, let alone all the ways you’ve detailed here, is the biggest compliment I could receive. I always hope the stuff I write will end up being beneficial in some way, either in engendering an appreciation in others for the things I love, or in helping engendering greater sympathy and understanding toward the things I tend to explore in my fiction, and hearing you say my writing had done that for you is amazing! If my stories have helped you develop more compassion and awareness toward those with disabilities, either mental or physical, that really is the most I could ever hope for. That’s such a big deal to me. Knowing specifically it helped you understand and have greater compassion toward those suffering from anorexia in particular is amazing to hear, and also to know it made you more aware of how unfortunately prevalent ableism is. Thank you so much for sharing that with me. And thank you also for sharing how my depiction of Levi in my stories has given you some sense of solace with your own experiences growing up! Again, that’s such a huge compliment. I also really appreciate what you said about the accusations leveled against me. I definitely don’t hate straight women, or anyone based on anything so arbitrary as sexual preference, haha. I just like to write Levi as queer in my stories, but anyone who knows me knows I don’t even actually ascribe any sexuality to Levi when I’m strictly talking about his canon character, because the truth is, it’s never an aspect of his character that gets brought up and so, doesn’t really matter in the context of canon. If someone wants to ship him with female characters, or with themselves, that’s fine by me, haha. I seriously don’t have any issue with any ships or any shipping community. Everyone should be allowed to ship what they want without being harassed. Just like everyone should be able to discuss Levi’s canon character without being targeted for it or accused of being anti shipping. Sadly, some people just can’t stay in their own lane and have to actively work to make anyone who thinks differently from them miserable. But anyway, seriously, thank you so much again! To know my work has served as that much of an inspiration to you is honestly inspiring to me, and I appreciate you reaching out to tell me so more than I can put into words! Thank you so much again!
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Guys something happened and im back on my she ra nonsense. Help all my recent tabs are tma fanfic i need to go deep in my bookmarks to pull out the she ra stuff and follow a ton of she ra posters bc its been like two years since i was substantially aware of she ra BUT THE HYPERFIX IS COMING BACK I CAN FEEL IT AAAAGH
Its 12:44 am and i’m going to write all my thoughts and theories and you are going to enjoy them
1. Beast island is actually sentient and the reason it makes that signal is because it’s achingly lonely and doesn’t want its new friends (anyone who comes to the island) to leave. Little does it know it’s forcing its depression upon everyone that visits
2. Etheria and Eternia are actually twin planets, the First Ones are humans, and Eternia is far-future Earth (idk, Earth got a neighbour and then we colonized it? Sure sounds like humans to me). This explains why the First Ones’ language is made up of English phonemes and includes English words, and why Adora looks human.
3. Horde Prime used to be an Eternian, a very long time ago. His current form is the result of hundreds of years of incredibly vain genetic engineering and experimenting. He still isn’t fully pleased with his appearance and tweaks his clones every generation in an attempt to find “purity”.
4. Hordak’s “defect” is a result of this tweaking. Imagine inbreeding, except it’s one guy who keeps turning random genes on and off and switching out base pairs to see if it’ll make him prettier. Turns out there were some nasty genetic surprises in Hordak’s version of the code. As with any other clone that had such genetic conditions, Prime tossed him out in the next major fleet movement without running any analyses first. Running an analysis would force him to confront the fact that he (gasp) made an error!
5. The “general” thing wasn’t actually complete bs. Prime threatening to take Catra’s body as his own, was. See, Prime really wants to be this one perfect thing. Why would he waste time being a cat when he could be perfect? He has a special line of “generals” whose sole purpose is to house his mind. They have two additional eyes, the ability to grow those weird chin/cheek spikes, and the capacity to be much taller (all hidden unless he gives them specific hormones in preparation for inhabiting them). All this to say: Hordak might just wake up with four eyes open one day and promptly freak himself (and everyone else) out.
6. Entrapta has been in the center of a lot of explosions (esepcially when she was a teenager and hadn’t figured out the right balance of “pursue knowledge” to “lab safety” yet) and has replaced a startling amount of her body with prosthetics covered in a synthetic skin.
7. Hordak’s body wasn’t repaired by Prime in season 5. Prime just injected him with a bunch of painkillers (not enough to not be in pain, but enough to function) and covered up the arm holes. About an hour after the finale, the painkillers wear off and Hordak all but collapses. Having a chronic muscle/joint condition + being electrocuted + being possessed hurts. Man, he really went through it, didn’t he?
8. Based on Wrong Hordak, it’s going to be… really hard for the clones to get used to being outside of the hivemind. They will form cults. They will make new pieces of technology that will mimic the hivemind. They’ll scrounge for the chips and try to implant them in each other. They will find and beg (or threaten) Entrapta and Hordak to put back the hivemind. Hopefully people will have enough compassion for them to help them get used to being individuals.
9. All Eternians have the capacity to activate the Sword of Protection and become She-Ra (or gender-correlated equivalent). Horde Prime is, initially, Eternian, based on the other headcanons here, so he hypothetically could. Any clone could. Hordak could.
Wow! I forgot about some of these headcanons! This was pretty neat. Hope you guys like em too. Also I haven’t watched canon in like a year so there might be some inaccuracies, but at some point I figured that holding onto the thoughts until I rewatched canon just wasn’t worth it. And lo and behold now you can see all my random thoughts too!
#she ra#she ra and the princesses of power#spop#hordak#entrapta#horde prime#thought dump#i’ve been thinking about these for a loooong time#like since 2020 in some cases#please enjoy my madness#if i’ve shared some of these in the past no i havent#some of these are used as worldbuilding in old fics that never saw the light of day
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hello des!! i hope you're doing ok, resting your wrist, drinking water, fixing shrimp posture etc.
little bit of a disclaimer, feel free to ignore this ask if it's too presumptuous/annoying.
so recently i had an idea for a fic. it was based off a post i saw that had cute little casual touches people can do when they like each other, and i was like OH. i want to write a donniexreader based off this. so i started outlining, clarifying a couple plot lines, etc. i sat down on a saturday morning, hoping to get all the little details ironed out.
then the inspiration hit me.
sam, i wrote 8k fucking words in one sitting. and i was so so excited. 'oh this is amazing, the muse is here and i can really get going!!!'
only problem is that when i was reading it back, i realized that it's so fucking similar to symphony.
not to get too into detail, but it's going over post-movie injuries/trauma (using a medically accurate explanation for each boy's injuries, which coincidentally is basically exactly how you wrote them) mutant/yokai racism, touch starvation (not donnie this time but still) april-casey relationship, and a musically inclined main character. oh and there's also a bad future timeline.
.......i know that a lot of those things have been written on in this fandom before, but considering the fact that i read your fic before i started mine and i don't want to steal your work. it's been worrying me a lot, so now i'm not able to write because i'm over-analysing everything trying to make sure it's as different as possible, but it's not really working out very well.
anyways. i'm not sure what i should do. i haven't really had a clear question in all of this....
i guess i should ask, do you mind if those things specifically are similar? should i say the fic is inspired by yours if i post it? should i not post it?
again if this is too abstract of a question, im sorry. i'm just concerned that i'm taking too much from your thing (symphony makes me laugh and cry and giggle and sit on the floor and stare at the ceiling for hours in the best possible way, and i am in awe of your storytelling)
this is kind of a difficult question for me to answer, to be honest, as i haven't read your fic but you've read mine. i have no idea how similar the two are, so i can't really give you my honest response on whether you're "copying" me or not.
that said, if it's similar enough to my fic that you feel the need to ask permission to write it... you kind of already have your answer on how close it is, don't you?
now, i'm not a fandom cop, and i don't believe in hoarding fic ideas. if you want to post a reader-insert fic with all the same plot beats as my fic, i'm confident enough in my own skills as a writer that i don't feel intimidated by someone doing something similar. we're all in fandom to have fun, and getting territorial over fic ideas is kind of counterproductive to that environment. i'm thrilled that reading my work inspired you to create something, and i'm very touched by the thoughtfulness you've shown in reaching out to ask permission to mirror it.
here's what i would probably do in this situation, if i got the response i'm giving you here and i decided to publish: in the author's note, i would say that i was inspired to write it after reading someone else's fic. i would link to it, encourage people to read it, then move on to the next project and just accept the fact that there may be people who pop up and accuse me of stealing. and whether you are or not is... kind of up to you, hahaha
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I love your nuanced takes. They are always a joy to read.
I'd be curious which songs, beatles or solo, do you think they wrote for/about each other and their situation (beatles&solo).
You don't have to go into great detail on them if you don't wanna.
Hope you have a great day. <3
Hi anon :) Glad you enjoy my takes! Hope you have a great day too <3
Preface that while I think this is fun, I really don't generally think songs are a good vehicle to extrapolate about the real life of these people. So, I try not to base my analyses of them as people on these songs, even the ones I feel more strongly about.
I'll categorize these by how certain I am about them (and I'll leave out confirmed stuff like Too Many People, Early 1970, How Do You Sleep?, Run of the Mill, Here Today etc.)
If you have a question re: why some specific song is in this category and not the other I can try to explain, though some of it is admittedly just vibes (and since I try to separate this from the Main Analysis™, I feel okay utilizing the vibes as a justification at times lol) If I left a song off you'd like my take on feel free to ask as well.
Close to positive:
Day Tripper is imho at least partially about Paul. This one feels so obvious to me, given what John said about it and the timeline (written squarely before Paul took LSD, conveniently after the whole LA fiasco), yet I rarely see people talking about it. Sad! It could also be partially about Cynthia.
Tug of War: Paul said it was about John in 1982 but then retconned that. IDK why he did that but. Come on!
I Know (I Know): I nearly put this one a tier lower but the I've Got A Feeling intro and the way it fits in the timeline. The Getting Better reference. It matching up with Paul's description of them tripping together + "share in each other's mind". It's too much.
A compelling case can be made:
In My Life: it makes a lot of sense. But Paul isn't the only likely muse IMO. he might be the most likely one, I'm not sure. I Know (I Know) makes me tend more to it though, admittedly.
3 Legs: yeah. Probably! It's not entirely clear to me what he's expressing outside a feeling of betrayal though.
Oh! Darling: Likely about John, but perhaps actually about the band as a whole.
The Answer's at the End: the way George quoted that same saying when asked about Paul in that live chat… THE IMPLICATIONS! (at least that maybe George came to associate the song with Paul later on?)
Remember: I tend to think this song is specifically about running away from the Beatles. There's more sadness in it, given John references Bring It On Home in the lyrics.
Who Can See It: this one also appears to be about George's general relationship with the Beatles. I don't think this is a hot take but no one talks about this song lol. I love it!
Cafe On The Left Bank: the song referencing Charles de Gaulle making a speech does place this quite firmly in the 60s. It's not really a love song though so I don't get why people consider this one such a win lol. It seems to mostly be about the city of Paris itself.
I like to think it's true but am admittedly not sure:
Call Me Back Again: it's a vague song, really. But damn… those mellotron flutes.
#9 Dream: IDK. this versus "The dream is over". the production-style. I like reading this song as a reconciliation with The Beatles as a concept.
Little Lamb Dragonfly: the whole being haunted by the dragonfly even though you're trying to move on thing :/
No Words: COME ON??????? but the Denny writing credit does puzzle me lol.
Crippled Inside: it would be soooooo devastating @ Paul!!! (probably only partially, possibly also self-directed)
Could have been inspired by the other but not necessarily in the way people think:
Some People Never Know: I do think Paul felt John was cynical in the way he's describing in this song. (I don't really think I Know (I Know) is a response to this song btw)
Silly Love Songs: ditto. He is Not fucking saying "I love you" (romantically) to John in the song he's duetting with his wife lol. but it could be a cheeky lil nod.
We Can Work It Out: I believe Paul when he says this was written about a fight he'd had with Jane. But Paul was also in conflict with John at the time (again, the LSD thing), thus I think that might have in some way informed his outlook when writing this. And John may have been thinking about their conflict while writing his part.
Let Me Roll It: it sounds a lot like John, yeah! but idk about the lyrics.
Look At Me: it could be about Paul, but it could be about the whole world, really. It's more a wish to be seen and understood really.
Dear Boy: I'm annoyed by people insisting Paul is lying when he says the inspiration is Linda's ex-husband. She's co-credited (and she actually isn't credited on every Ram song. I don't think the credit was "handed" to her, at least not at this point in time)! That being said, Paul may have bonded with Linda over feeling unappreciated in their previous life situations.
Yvonne's The One: Look. I think John's death really shifted how Paul felt about telling people he loved them. That may well have influenced the lyrics song. I don't think it's necessarily that literal.
However Absurd: ditto. This song is even more abstract so it feels even less literal.
?????? Who Knows
If I Fell: usually I think no it couldn't possibly. But– (And I don't find that Valentines card very compelling, no. but it's just like: well then who else would this song John called very personal about? I guess, for all I know, it could even be Brian. wow!)
Girl: I mean. Maybe! Sort of. They also said at the time it was about religion, and that makes a lot of sense, but it could still be that the character of the girl was inspired by how John felt about Paul at the time.
I'm So Tired: it seems equally likely to be about Yoko to me.
Don't Let Me Down: ditto. Actually. this one's more likely Just about Yoko tbh.
I'm Losing You: maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe. but also. Yoko.
Now And Then: genuinely who knows. this one's admittedly stranger for Yoko but… they did "interrupt" their relationship often, requiring to "start again". Also May is an option.
The Pound Is Sinking: Mostly, I don't know how straightforward it is.
Honestly… Not really
(Just Like) Starting Over: the "My Love", "Another Day", "Wings" thing has never compelled me, based on those being OLD songs by 1980, plus none of the phrasing or word choice is particularly conspicuous to me. But I also don't feel very strongly that it's not about Paul. It could be, though I don't know that I'd assume it was meant as a direct declaration of love then. Also the line before being a reference to Through The Looking Glass is neither here nor there. Since when is John Lennon dropping Lewis Caroll references only reserved for Paul? that feels like putting the cart before the horse, based on one single lyric in Glass Onion.
I've Got A Feeling: I think he's just saying words here, tbh.
Real Love: if it's about Paul that's fucking depressing. But I don't think it is really.
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A small ramble about Eclipse's therapy
Okay, so this is all copy-pasted from Discord where I was going through it minute by agonizing minute and just rambling my little heart out
This episode. Specifically this one. Ramble under cut.
Reminders before I talk about this! Eclipse is confirmed to have ASPD in canon. I also have ASPD. I do know things on that topic because of this unfortunate fact. For some in-depth things on Eclipse's sociopathy, I suggest popping over to these two analyses! Eclipse Is a Sociopath - Traits of ASPD
Eclipse obviously doesn't even want to be here, we know this from the very start when Moon is literally shoving him to get him into the room
Eclipse attempts (and fails) to intimidate both Moon and Solar. First with the comment about Lunar, which was meant to get under Moon's skin but when he didn't get a reaction he brushed it off with a 'whatever'. Next with the stand-off with Solar "Name is Solar" Technically correct, as we know from earlier episodes that his name is "Solar Eclipse" and Lunar is "Lunar Eclipse" The 'eclipse brothers' (Which is only further supported by the fact that a blood moon is a type of eclipse) Of course, we all know this was not the answer Solar was wanting. (Solar gets his own petty revenge by dragging the process out. Moon also gets petty revenge by mocking Eclipse. This is honestly a good reminder that they all came from the same base personality.)
Eclipse was flabbergasted. Absolutely gobsmacked. Shook When Moon told him upfront that he does need therapy. I think this stems partly from the fact that this is Moon and Moon has never tried to do something that would benefit Eclipse And then just being told what he already knows by someone else probably caught him off guard. He doesn't want to go to therapy because he thinks that therapy means he is weak. We already know how Eclipse feels about being weak and needing to rely on others for literally anything. We see this on a lesser extent with Solar who doesn't ask for anything because he doesn't want to be seen as a burden.
I do think it's important that he calls Solar the 'inferior version' right after calling him the 'better version' of himself. He called Solar better than him and then immediately change his words. Possibly because he can't stand the fact that Solar actually is better than him. Not necessarily in what one thinks of when we do comparisons like that, but more of Solar's more stable than Eclipse. He has a family to lean back on. . . unlike Eclipse. The one person that Eclipse cared about (at one point but now claims to hate) now hates Eclipse but loves Solar, which is just. . . another version of Eclipse. And that knowledge has to be painful, even for Eclipse.
It's also possible that Eclipse actually does think that Solar is inferior due to the common mindset that socio/psychopaths tend to have about 'normal people' around them. We pity people on a superficial level for being held back by fickle things like emotions and guilt, while also blatantly ignoring our own issues that make our own lives 582390458234098x harder due to the packaged deal that is ASPD
(To briefly summarize the "package deal" - along with socio/psychopathy toss in Anxiety Disorders, Paranoia, Dissociation/Derealization Issues, PTSD, ADHD/ADHD-symptoms, and Depression)
Back to the analysis
Eclipse immediately starts to mock Earth's office. He tends to mock Earth a lot in the past, because she's a very reactive character. It also used to be a lot easier to make her insecure. Someone who is insecure isn't going to press a hostile party for conversation/information.
Earth, like the girl-boss she is, calls him out. Kudos to Earth
Okay let's step back from Eclipse a second because MOON This is probably the worst possible timing for him to bring Eclipse in for a therapy appointment and he knows it and even though Earth says it's fine he's still apologizing and genuinely sorry and I think that's a huge step from how he was falling apart a little bit ago and slipping back into what Old Moon was Moon's also always had a soft spot for Earth (Big brother syndrome except Moon is technically the youngest sibling)
Okay back to Eclipse. After a failed attempt to get under Earth's skin he goes for Moon again. The man really do be flabbergasted that the two most reactive people he knows aren't giving him the reaction he wants.
And then back to Earth. He honestly spends the first bit just trying to get a reaction out of everyone because that's what he's good at. He's exasperated when Earth starts asking him questions, and gives her his normal sarcastic a-hole response. He's purposefully unnerving and trying to make both Earth and Moon uncomfortable because he doesn't want to be there.
He skirts around the abandonment question, which just lets everyone in the room know that he does indeed feel abandoned. He deflects the question honestly horribly in my opinion. "Abandoned, why would I feel abandoned?" Proceeds to list off reasons that he would feel abandoned but phrases them as questions. Sir? Try harder.
Moon plays a common tactic when dealing with unwilling peoples. "The sooner you play along the sooner you can leave." Common courtroom/interrogation tactic. Gives a goal to work toward while also implying that they're willing to stick around for as long as the person in the room is willing to bullcrap them. This may be a familiar tactic to the audience because parents love using this when teens are lying to them. So do teachers. "Just tell us what we want to hear and then we can be done. But if you sit here in silence then I'll sit here in silence with you."
Reminds me of parole. A lot of people who've gotten in trouble with the powers that be are required to participate in active therapy if they want to get out of a heavier charge. It's a common requirement of plea deals
Watch me ramble Back on track
Plsplspls and then Eclipse says the same thing I FORGOT HE SAID IT CUT ME SOME SLACK IM TYPING AS I WATCH THIS FOR THE SECOND TIME ITS BEEN A WHOLE DAY I've got the adhd my memory is not that good sir
I'm only 6 minutes in are you bored yet
Earth does irritate him by making assumptions about him that are wrong. It's a small blow to the pride. He's not acting like he doesn't care, he just doesn't care. And then he just starts bullcrapping so I'm gonna call him out on his bullcrap
He didn't just care about the star
Someone who doesn't care isn't going to be hurt by rejection so lets go over the list
Getting back to Moon. Remerging their code which is where he felt like he was supposed to be. Moon shoved him away, rejected him, and that made him upset
Lunar. Lunar wasn't just a means to an end because Lunar had just the right traits, the right level of whatever to make Eclipse care about him. Think of it like this. Eclipse was barely offended by Bloodmoon attacking him and ditching him. But he went out of his way to blow Lunar up because Lunar, in his eyes, betrayed him
The star to an extent. He cared less about the star itself and more about being able to make a world perfect for him and those around him. He was a Lawful Evil type back then (Dances in DnD language)
Eh that's honestly all I can think of off the top of my head. I'd argue he also cared about Sun to an extent because he used to be Moon, but probably not as much these days lol But yeah CUT THE CRAP ECLIPSE GRRR WHOO LOW SELF ESTEEM "You'd all just immediately try to find a way to kill me" He really do think that everyone would just go out of their way to kill him even if he was existing peacefully. He's half right
Sun didn't really want anything to do with it. Solar was just going along with it because Moon's his best friend (and Solar himself is insecure whoo). Earth isn't confrontational. Ruin (who probably brought eclipse back, btw where did he disappear to we haven't seen that cockroach for a while) didn't hop on the kill Eclipse train until after he was 'kidnapped', and we all know how sus that was. Lunar, yeah, but that's Lunar. Moon also was immediately like "omg kill this guy" but also, that's just Moon. Like I have talked about how self-centered those two are before, haven't I? Monty also wanted to kill Eclipse on sight but he's literally worse than Moon so he don't really count. Monty is literally an awful person who is only semi-decent because of Earth
Eclipse describes his death to Earth as if she wasn't literally there. Again. Reactions. As well as the weird complinsult which she has no idea how to process. Is it an insult? Is it a compliment? It's both honey. It's both. Take it or leave it. Once again frustration and insecurity at the lack of control Eclipse has ove everything. From being monitored, to being brought back, to literally being in a brand new body that he had no say in. The physical lack of control bleeds into the mentality that he has no control over anything, including his own thoughts and emotions. And what's sad is it's kind of true. . . he can't even control his own actions some of the time because of the directives. That just makes him feel paranoid and hopeless, and while he doesn't say it explicitly, it shows. He doesn't think he can change in his mentality because he can't change anything else around him either. That's part of why he thinks therapy is pointless.
10:30 This is where I argue he takes off his metaphorical mask. Not because he trusts Earth, but he's trying to see where her breaking point is. She's been patient and kind and making an attempt to be understanding and it's curious because no one has ever just sat there and asked him questions and let him ramble. He's trying to make her uncomfortable still, but he's also curious. This is a button that has never been presented to him before, how many times can he press it before it's taken away from him. At first he's thinking about his answers, calculating his responses, but it feels honest.
12:20 And then he realized that he was getting ahead of himself and that he was just rambling because he's never had someone to talk to and he stops. Whether it's because it's something he doesn't want her to know, or Moon to know, or it's just something he isn't ready to say out loud yet, he changes topics.
And then he's back to deflecting and getting the focus off of him and poking at Earth again
(Side note: Earth calls him an idiot in a roundabout way and it made me giggle both times watching it)
"You would take more pride in-" Pauses video Gestures frantically PRIDE UGH THE FALLING POINT OF A SOCIOPATH IS OUR PRIDE Yes he would take more pride in it being about information gathering. He'd probably be more complicit if it were for that purpose instead of 'inner healing' because going to therapy is a BLOW TO HIS PRIDE IM Ignore me as I go insane Presses play
Eclipse breaking the fourth wall like-
He's very cynical about the idea of trust and it's because the few times he put his trust in someone/thing it's failed him. AND THEN MORE DEFLECTION ECLIPSE PLEASE- Just stay on topic I'm begging you I know it's hard but LET ME HARVEST YOUR BRAIN MAN STOP DEFLECTING
He's so gobsmacked when Earth claims that we aren't defined by who makes us. Which must be hard to hear for Eclipse because for a while there his entire identity was defined by the fact that he was made by Moon and left behind.
He presses Earth for further detail about this and it makes me wonder if this was the first time he's ever heard or conceptualized this
It's fun to hear Eclipse (I think for the first time) finally verbally disown Sun and Moon. "I don't care to make it right anymore. They've cast their stone and now I'm stuck in my own ship." AKA They had their chance to give him a chance time and time again and each time they shunned him. Why would you go back to someone who has only caused you pain? Eclipse is in a similar situation with Sun/Moon that Lunar is in with him. Part of him wants to be back with them because he was made from them, they will always be part of him just how Eclipse will always be part of Lunar. Violence begets more violence.
I do think it's interesting how Eclipse doesn't acknowledge that he blew up Lunar and it's probably because he didn't blow up Lunar. The Eclipse before him did. Just like how Moon didn't reject him, the Moon before did. (I'll come back to that later)
Earth has to point out that Lunar got ka-boomed and then Eclipse laughs "Oh yes, I did, right." Because, again, he didn't. The Eclipse before him did. It feels like he's trying to avoid taking accountability for that (and good on him because he's technically innocent it's not his fault he has the corrupted memories of a dead man)
HOWEVER ON THAT NOTE
It does feel like with every day that passes by those memories become more of who he is now, and he's slowly accepting them as part of his own identity because he's kind of stuck with them. If you woke up in a random place and someone handed you a broom and said 'you're bob the janitor' and that's all you knew you'd probably believe it (/ref)
(If someone gets that reference I will love you forever)
"Do you really. . . not care about him?" - Earth Eclipse: Doesn't answer the question, answers a question with a question which is DEFLECTING
Sir? You do too still care don't you?
"It's kind of hard to empathize with you" - Earth Me: Runs up chat to grab something
"a normal person cannot relate to a sociopath because our life experiences are so vastly different. You (general you) will never be able to understand what it’s like to be physically unable to care about someone to the point that it hurts because you want to care. And a socio/psychopath will never be able to understand on a visceral level what it’s like to be able to connect with another person or be able to feel things all the time or to do the right thing simply because something compels you to and not because you had to ask yourself “is this morally good or bad behavior” because you just know" - Me four days ago
Do find it interesting how Eclipse has no comment when Earth says he doesn't like her He probably likes her just fine, if I'm being honest. Probably likes her more than most other characters. He's just kinda a jerk and likes to press her buttons because it's funny
When she does manage to hit something right on the nail "It must be scary, right?" And "You just never have a sense of control" He makes a kinda-joke "Are we just going to keep talking about how sad we are" to change the topic AND SHE LAUGHED SHE LAUGHED AT HIS JOKE 👑 Ma'am you dropped this
I do personally Eclipse's sense of humor because it's pretty on point with my own, but I also really enjoy people being uncomfortable with it as well because that's half the fun. So I'm getting a small amount of dark enjoyment of Earth being uncomfortable at the boom joke
((Earth did awesome considering the circumstances. I can respect the fact that she is communicating her own emotional and mental needs even while dealing with someone who's not exactly pleasant for the general populace. She's gotten a lot better at setting boundaries))
Eclipse walks out because he's irritated with Moon. It's a power play. "I may have been forced to be here, but you can't make me sit and listen to you." He honestly had no idea what Moon would have said at the moment, and I also don't think that it would have been the best timing for Moon to drop that on him. They need a calm environment where neither of them is worked up to start touching that topic. Also MOON He's apologizing for something that isn't even his fault and while I can respect that, I almost wish he wasn't taking the blame for something a past self did. Just like how Eclipse is trying not to take accountability for what dead-man Eclipse did. They're two people who have been hurt by the actions of their predecessors and are playing out a game that was set into motion long long before their time. Now the only question that remains is who is Romeo and who is Juliet
Anyway that was the episode
Am taking inquiries and demands as well as bounties for my head
#sun and moon show#earth and lunar show#tsams moon#tsams fnaf#eclipse tsams#tsams earth#tsams solar#tsams#eclipse analysis#tsams analysis#alex talks#video analysis
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rui kamishiro, the alchemist - an extremely jumbled overanalysis
⚠️ LONG POST AHEAD ⚠️
hello rui fanclub. instead of doing schoolwork i think about rui as the alchemist. what’s new with me i know.
but why is he an alchemist specifically?
because if you look at it simply, rui’s jobs in the shows could also garner the title of ‘mechanic’. where you take a lot of metal and make it into something functional, or fix it so it works again. fundamentally that’s what he does right? with all the robots and staging ideas? and to some extent he could also be a ‘poet’ or ‘philosopher’ because we know he and tsukasa write the shows (during the pxl arc anyway) and he’s constantly coming up with new show ideas. there’s stuff like ‘magician’ or ‘wizard’, which could also be used to describe how he does things with such ease — and we’re not even going to mention ‘genius’ or ‘whiz kid’, okay?
so with all of that said, rui haters /j can essentially say that rui’s title of ‘alchemist’ is just him trying to sound a little cooler — and to some extent they might be correct. like have you seen this man
but let’s get to the nitty gritty of today’s wall of text, because there’s no way sega would call him an alchemist and not know what that entails. putting on my swirly nerd glasses.
✨alchemy✨ according to the merriam-webster kids definition is as follows:
“a medieval chemical science with the goals of changing less valuable metals into gold, discovering a single cure for all diseases, and discovering how to live forever”
and is commonly cited by most articles i read on the topic to have been a mixing of science and magic, having been the predecessor of modern chemistry. that part sounds like rui, doesn’t it?
and honestly, that alone should be enough to stop me from yapping, BUT WE NEED TO HIT THE BOTTOM. HAND ME MY SHOVEL I’M GOING IN /lyr
by the way!! i am completely aware of the more metaphorical meaning of alchemy where it’s essentially synonymous with magic, e.g. “he performed his alchemy o’er the pot and the water became soup”. but since wxs are often cited as the guys with the whimsical references to olden times (gestures wildly at revival my dream) i have no reason NOT to analyse him from the philosophical perspective.
so basically the alchemist has three main goals as we said before and just for my sanity (and my english teacher’s approval even though she’s not ever going to look at this) i’ll use them to organise my thoughts.
⚠️ DISCLAIMER: this post is not properly structured or organised and may be hard to understand. if you need any clarification on anything i say here please let me know! and ofc feel free to add your own ideas! also this is not too serious or in-depth ⚠️
websites used for research have been linked in underlined words :D (ex. wikipedia)
the transmutation of metals a.k.a. turning ‘lesser’ metals into gold
this one is pretty straightforward. rui is somewhat of a metal manipulator by making his robots, and while he doesn’t turn them into gold literally he DOES make them more valuable by giving them something better — life.
now obviously your life is more valuable than gold — although capitalism says otherwise! /j
also, as wxs’ alchemist specifically, rui’s job is to take them as they are — let’s say, their base forms — and make them shine through his directing, thus making them into something brighter, like gold! (addition for all the ruikasers in chat: gold shares its alchemical symbol with the sun and the sun is a star and guess who’s a star COUGH)
something else interesting though: according to the royal society of chemistry:
“To the medieval alchemist's mind the different elements were but the same original substance in varying degrees of purity. Gold was the purest of all and silver followed closely.”
it kinda gives a bit of weight to rui’s character and (just because i have to revise it for school) his relation to the general human experience in a way. we know that rui’s been outcasted for most of his life because of his interest in shows — but at his core he is still human, just like everyone else. i keep thinking about that line from rmd whenever i think about rui and the human experience, where little rui says “i am me, people are people”. it’s not wrong per se — but he’s just as human as everyone else, is he not? that’s why his story (especially pandemonium) hits so hard imo. it also then makes sense why rui treats his robots as his “little darlings” and gives the plants so much care, because all the world is made of the same stuff — according to the alchemist, at least.
…sorry that was me extrapolating. MOVING ON
finding a single cure for all diseases
now we get into the stretchy parts of this analysis.
getting rid of all diseases would theoretically better the entire world, at least in a medical point of view. now what does rui use all of his fancy robots for? as a catalyst for making people smile with his shows, of course! as we all know, laughter is the best medicine, and a smile can brighten someone’s day (so they say).
and furthermore, all of rui’s little exploits, and generally just his character overall, work for the good of others. i don’t know if i’m using this term correctly but i feel that he’s sort of a chaotic good person: working for what is good and just, even if it goes against authority. i mean, we see this right from the start of the game’s story — making nenerobo so nene can continue pursuing her dreams; the mall area conversation where he makes a balloon stegosaurus when the employee isn’t looking, claiming that it’ll be a much better present for the lucky kid who receives it; doing his robot shows in public even if the police chase him and nobody stops by to watch it all anyway, perhaps in the hopes that just one person will be even lightly amused by his antics. even when he intended to work alone, he sought to better other people’s lives, even if they didn’t appreciate him for it. (which ofc makes me so sad)
finding the elixir of immortality
now this one i initially struggled to get a good argument for because there’s a lot of things you can talk about here. the immortalisation of an individual is one of them — in making a show or story you essentially make a permanent memoir of the ideas you had for it, or the world at the time in which you wrote it, and i suppose in the case of the wonder stage immortalising the memory of a person in keeping grandpa otori’s stage alive.
but then it hit me.
rui wants to immortalise a *moment,* not necessarily one person. the time he has with wxs. which we are all aware that they are running out of.
this isn’t that clear in the early story because he’s not as attached to them yet — which i suppose leaves a hole in my argument since he’s used the title since before the main story. but maybe he only gained this goal in its full extent after joining wxs. curtain call and our happy ending make it very clear that rui wants to be with wxs, ideally, forever. and let’s not even MENTION the fact that they worked in phoenix wonderland which is supposed to be an immortal bird!!
i suppose at its core the idea of immortalisation is to spend time with the immortal individual forever, so that they can continue to have all the wonderful moments of life. everyone fears death to some extent, after all. so therefore: rui’s current alchemic quest, alongside/after the wxs training arc, would be to find that elixir for wxs and somehow find a way to make shows with them forever… even though realising that he *needs* to let go is probably going to be the most groundbreaking part of his character progression.
rui’s philosopher’s stone (not the harry potter book)
you might be wondering why i’ve titled this section this way but i promise i’ve got a point
so the philosopher’s stone is basically related to all three of the alchemist’s goals in some form. apparently if you put it in the ground it produces metals faster? (because apparently they thought it just grew like that. you DO get stones from the ground so i guess that checks out. AND THAT’S WHY RUI IS A GEOLOGIST IN THE KIRAPIKA SET.) i think i saw an image with its symbol that called it the ‘end of all ends’. so it’s kind of a miracle object in the sense that, once discovered or created, will instantly fulfil the aims of alchemy.
now obviously being in the modern age, rui isn’t looking for something that can solve all the world’s issues forever, because that’s proven impossible. but maybe there’s something that can do the next best thing — and for rui, that’s doing shows. it might sound silly (and i’ll come back to that in a bit) but rui knows how wonderful shows can be, how they make people smile and forget their ailments for just a small moment — they don’t get rid of them, of course, but they offer the next best thing he can give. that fateful little mermaid show gave him a purpose in life, basically, something he could work towards that could affect people in ways that a robot on its own simply couldn’t.
and i suppose, in that sense, all of wxs are alchemists, too…? well, if we apply this to some sort of medieval fantasy game, they’d be in his party and help him out, right?
the alchemist as an outcasted figure
so basically from most of the stuff i read, alchemy was generally frowned upon (and even outlawed in england) due to being associated with fraud, with con artists of the time utilising the transmutation thing for their own personal gain, and just generally looking for something impossible. i think in some way this could be connected to rui being ostracized by his peers because of his ideas — he’s not a fraud, but the actual alchemists of the time tended to receive the same reputation as the con artists. and i imagine the alchemical experiments were pretty dangerous back in those times, so there’s that whole thing with people not trusting rui’s ideas to be safe and practical.
bonus related discussion: do you think maybe people were envious of rui’s ‘genius brain’ and wished he would use it for something other than shows… like scientific endeavours? idk this is just a half formed thought i had after writing this particular section. in the same way that alchemy started to become an old practice, did rui’s love for theatre and whimsy grow to be seen as farfetched at any point? maybe in that mysterious elite high school— okay that one is just me grasping at straws. but it makes you think, right?
main conclusion
the role of alchemist really fits rui to a tee, right down to the context of the times. and i’m karamell, chairwoman of the rui fanclub. and there are literally so many things that sega could play with in regards to card symbolism (COUGH the alchemic symbols COUGH COUGH) that i secretly hope to see in the future!
(and now you, dearest reader, have some completely impractical information about a bunch of pixels under your belt. read and flourish!)
bonus: planetary references
in ancient alchemic writings the planetary symbols were actually used for alchemy as well, as in they were used to identify some of the main metals. as such most of the metals are associated with the solar system as well, notably gold with the sun, silver with the moon, and mercury with, well, mercury.
now… what is rui’s colorfes card themed around?
that’s right: SPACE.
now this could be entirely coincidental bc its implied in the story that his colorfes sekai was based on one of his favourite sci-fi books (show? movie? i’m a fake rui fan what text type was Trip to the Moon) but sega likes their extended metaphors and symbolism.
so anyway that’s the REAL end of the post. that will be all. no, i didn’t need to write all of that, but i did because isn’t that what my training is for?
#karamell yells#project sekai#rui kamishiro#karamell’s confections#rui the alchemist post#has been sitting around since july… so here y’all go. happy reading ig#this is 10% research and 90% me making stuff up 😁#but um. this is the length i go to for my boy
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I feel like I should’ve started talking about this much earlier when I first started to obsessively post about the 2024 remake of Nosferatu. But it’s something that I feel like I needed more time to think about and process it. Even then, I’m not sure if my thoughts here will be thoroughly developed, so perhaps I’ll do a follow up to this post if I feel like I’ll have more to expand on with what I say here.
I’m going to be discussing about my own jumbled and currently unorganised thoughts in relation to the dynamic between Ellen and Orlok as portrayed in the 2024 version. But I do want to state that much of what I’ll say here is just my own personal interpretation and what I got out of it. I do understand that others will have a different take on it, which I think is absolutely fine. If I do get something wrong about certain details, please don’t be afraid to correct me in the comments or reblogs.
I feel, however, that what I will say here is perhaps not as clear or well-thought out as I want it to be. So I hope that me writing down my initial perceptions and interpretations will give me some leeway into following up on it with more clarity soon.
With that aside, let’s get into it.
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Whenever I think about the connection between Count Orlok and Ellen Hutter, a certain thought keeps on popping up in my mind - which became more prominent after my second viewing of the remake at the cinemas. I couldn’t help but keep on thinking how “just because someone may have a better understanding of what you yearn and desire for (as well as all the deeper parts of you that others may not properly understand), it doesn’t mean that it’s a good thing”. And for me, I think that thought served as the basis of what I ended up taking out of the portrayal of Ellen’s connection to Orlok.
I personally feel that between the two (and which I think the film makes this obvious in terms of general/surface-level reading), love is practically impossible for them - mainly due to the abusive and coercive ways that Orlok goes about with the way he tries to get Ellen to submit to him. And though there is perhaps some kind of genuine carnal desire and lust between the two, it didn’t guarantee for me that they were “meant for each other”, in a way. Like for me, I couldn’t really gloss over that. This was definitely made more concrete as a result of my second viewing (no offence and disrespect, Ellen x Orlok enthusiasts).
However, I’m aware that this is me reading into the dynamic of the two based off of what’s made obvious - the Text, in other words. With a film like this, there’s definitely going to be way more to unpack and to take in than what appears on the surface - which is where the Subtext is taken to account. From what I’ve seen in other people’s personal analyses of the movie, there’s a lot to discuss in terms of repression of desire and sexuality (especially in the context of Victorian women and the societal climate of that time period), as well as other themes that others have pointed out that I haven’t mentioned or have forgotten about.
But what stuck out to me a lot was when I saw someone else’s tumblr post discussing something in regards to validation in terms of Ellen and Orlok’s dynamic (which I honestly wished I remember which tumblr user it was because I think some of the points made in their post made a lot of sense). I sort of forgot what it was specifically that much of the post said, but I do remember how it made me feel more haunted by the connection between Ellen and Orlok.
Which I think makes things more sad and tragic in terms of how it all started for Ellen:
Being a lonely teenager, calling out to whoever and whatever to ease her loneliness and sorrow
and then the universe responding by gifting her a monstrous being who both sees and understands all the parts of her that almost everyone around her has shunned and misunderstood, whilst also bringing great trauma to her that haunts her all the way to her adulthood.
It’s scary when the person that ‘validates’ all the repressed parts of yourself is also the person that traumatises (or at the very least, hurts) you.
Orlok sees, knows, and exactly understands Ellen’s repressed lust and desires, which is what makes the way he pursues after her feel more daunting the more I reflect back on this film - he not only violates her, but puts the lives of those she’s close to (Thomas, as a notable example) in heavy danger. All of that, just to satiate his own appetite and lust for her. And yet that undeniable lustful pull between the two exists; it’s a very real thing between them both, even if it’s not healthy and good at all (especially for Ellen, who blatantly expresses the pain and shame she feels with how parasitic and toxic it is).
Now there’s obviously way more to take into account of in terms of how the two could be interpreted way beyond what I just said here. Plus, I feel that I can’t just box up Ellen as being solely a victimised individual, and nor can I reduce Orlok into solely being an abusive figure - whilst those aspects are definitely one of the core parts that make up both their characterisations, it’s not the only thing that exists about them. Again, there’s so much more ground for me to explore in terms of what I have taken in with regard to how these two are portrayed in this remake of Nosferatu.
Now I would’ve ended this post here, but there’s some more that I have to say - especially in regards to how weirdly…personal it got into making this post.
With Orlok and Ellen’s dynamic, it was something that I did often think about whenever I began to reflect back on my general experiences, but never would have thought that it would ever end up feeling personal to me. But as I was thinking much more about it whilst writing this, that’s when it started feeling like I was looking down at shards of a broken mirror - in each piece, held a clear-as-day reflection that gazed back at me.
Their dynamic started to remind me of certain aspects of my life that I will not delve into heavy detail about, but let’s just say it was quite intimidating (and eventually became saddening) at first when my mind began to see elements of those aspects within the way Orlok and Ellen’s dynamic was portrayed here. And it definitely put into more perspective as to why I saw this Nosferatu remake in the ways that I do (and definitely made me feel even more scared and shameful of the divisive and super problematic attraction my brain had developed towards Bill Skarsgård’s portrayal of Count Orlok). But perhaps that’s what this film is meant to do - create a kind of dissonance between me recognising the horror in what unfolds whilst also feeling the undeniable dark perverse eroticism in it.
It ended up making this post somewhat more challenging to write out than I was anticipating. But I guess that’s what just makes Nosferatu (2024) so impactful for me, even if what I expressed here isn’t enough to truly convey what this film holds.
I hope this post made sense, but admittedly I feel that it’s quite rambling, maybe lacking backbone, possibly misunderstanding some things, and all-over-the-place. Again, I may make a follow-up to this when I feel like the things I have to say are a lot more concrete.
#nosferatu#i feel like there’s things i’m missing out on mentioning icl#nosferatu 2024#but yeah i’m just churning out what i got so far#in terms of my thoughts#obsessed with nosferatu#nosferatu movie#robert eggers#count orlok#ellen hutter#bill skarsgård#lily rose depp#film discussion#nosferatu (2024)#orlok#ellen and orlok#gothic horror
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i do love how much more militaristic heid is in the remake universe. and how he's got much more valor / honour. it's obvious my portrayal of him is entirely based on the remake / rebirth version of him. however, my lore is a mix of the original / rebirth. i love the original so will draw from it a LOT.
but one thing i appreciate massively in rebirth with heid is that everything we see of him is actually good. like, they've actually added the nuance i wanted to his character. though he's in fewer scenes than i'd like, it warms my heart to see his character expanded on in a way that isn't entirely negative.
in remake, we see him as a bully. he's brutal and cruel - he's a villain in every sense of the word. but, since writing him and analysing his scenes - i told myself 'no, this character is a WAR veteren - he isn't just a moustache twirling villain as people like to say', i tried my best to write him as a character with flaws, good and bad. i wanted to portray a sadistic, brutal man who holds grudges and scars. who is as capable of being loyal and brave as he is a monster. and i do appreciate rebirth for giving us the humanity that i wanted so desperately to portray in my portrayal -
like; i love his interactions with the soldiers. as @ivory-paragon said on my last post; that pride he gets from his soldiers doing a good job in his own seeking approval from his new boss. like, if they do a good job - he does a good job ( at least, he sees so ). it's nice to see him appreciate them, even for a second. and its good to see him pine for rufus' attention. he wants rufus to know that he's competent and doing a good job. at a later point in the game, when rufus demands his directors prove their loyalty. admittedly, i found it a little odd. heidegger has already given his blood for the company and for him specifically. this is a post ill make another day, im sure.
and during the ceremony, we see both a much more professional conduct from him AND a more heroic side of him. i made a post analysing his actions and suggesting they could be a mix of valour, self preservation, bravery or kindness. i see it as all of the above.
in later scenes, we see heidegger openly berate a traitor / show disgust over someone being a traitor. he resents it. i love that because it once again shows us his code of honour. his thoughts and feelings toward the military and how passionate he is to those he serves. heidegger is a low of things but a coward is not one of them, i love that rebirth has confirmed that.
idk, i got a lot of feelings. im sad that i didnt get more of my boy. of course i am, i played the game watching dyne and dio and thinking how tempted i am to try and take them up but also, heid has such a strange, special place in my heart.
since writing him, i lost my dad and my best friend - nina. i've grieved so much and been through so many life changes from graduating uni to changing career all while writing this character and idk, he's always been a consistent place for me to channel emotion through writing / analysis. so, it's nice seeing him again and even nicer having some of my own theories confirmed to me.
#this turned from a hc post to an amotional lill dumb thing#i wasnt upset the other day about rebirth making me doubt my characterisation#if anything - for me - it solidified certain things i feel#i was sad because other heid fans dont like me ha#(ooc)#(headcanon)#(analysis)
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I really love all your analyses!! tbh i think in overwatch but especially in blackwatch cassidy was seen as "low maintenance" when it came to physical and mental care because he was so used to having to fend for himself that everyone just assumed so
Couldn't put it into better words myself. But it isn't just the fact that he's always had to fend for himself, yes it started that way for everyone else but with Cassidy he was always responsible for someone else. In the Crisis he wasn't able to let himself feel, he needed to survive, that was the goal, in Deadlock he was responsible for Ashe, Julian and Frankie, making sure they didn't get caught, injured or kidnapped. In Blackwatch he was responsible for Genji, he also became the "big brother", the role model to a lot of the younger characters, specifically Tracer and Pharah. At that point he wasn't allowed to feel, to mess up, to make mistakes or fully let himself relax because people were counting on him, looking up to him. And then no one listened to him when he told people the things happening with Blackwatch, with Reyes, with Moira.
Then Gerard died, Ana died, Mina died, Mei and Sigma went missing, Echo was put into quarantine, and he was everyone else's shoulder to cry on. He most likely comforted Reyes when Gerard, Ana and Mina died, he comforted Pharah when Ana died, comforted Mercy when Mei and Sigma disappeared and he most likely only let himself feel anger when Echo was put into quarantine. Everyone else around him was falling apart so he needed to stay strong, after all he could take care of himself, right? He was low maintenance. He was surrounded by death and betrayal his entire life, he could handle it.
Then the Swiss Base incident happened and he spiraled. I've gone into some details about this but it's heavily implied that Cassidy is a functional alcoholic (getting blackout drunk at various bars, a lot of his interactions/voice lines involving alcohol), it's also somewhat implied that Cassidy has relapsed back into smoking (his old voice line with Mercy and his behavior around Ana). He was taken away from every support system he had and now that he finally needed one it was gone. He was a wanted criminal with a 60 million bounty on his head, he couldn't talk to anyone, he didn't want to put them in danger.
I think the only people who know and understand what Cassidy has gone through are Angela, Ana and Sombra.
Angela is very similar to Cassidy in that people view her as low maintenance, she's the golden child, the medical prodigy, she's the support for everyone around her, a golden light of hope for the future. It's why you will always see me say that Angela and Cassidy are each others comfort person. They've known each other for 20 years, have been in Overwatch for the same amount of time, they were used and lied to by the people they thought they could trust. There's a reason Ana had to talk both of them into joining Overwatch again.
Ana has only recently realized how everything affected Cassidy, and there is now doubt in my mind that she feels responsible for what he's gone through. She's the only one out of the Old Soldiers Trio who doesn't glorify Cassidy's time in Blackwatch, whereas both Reaper and Solider have voice/elimination lines that indicate they don't grasp the fact that Cassidy was more negatively impacted by his time in Blackwatch.
Then there's Sombra, we don't see much of they're dynamic in cannon but the fact that Sombra has seen Cassidy blackout drunk at a bar, has seen his search history (listen, I know it's a joke but she defiantly saw some concerning stuff in that search history), and is the character with the most similar backstory to him. Orphaned survivor of the crisis joins a gang then ends up working for a big organization.
I defiantly think that Cassidy is on his last footing, which makes me worried for when he finds out about Reaper. Cause either Angela is going to tell him or he's going to figure it out on his own. And as much as I'm of the opinion Cassidy isn't going to be merciful towards Reaper, I don't think he's going to have a healthy reaction.
Hopefully the New Blood crew will help him when he starts to spiral, because they are all very similar to him.
Sorry for the rant and thank you for enjoying my analyses!! There are defiantly more to come.
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was wondering if u had advice on how to do this, like the whooole critblr (was wondering if you could define that as well because i don’t actually know ;-;), since i havent seen one for tina or niki (analyses and info) and i’d like to make it
Critblr as a whole is kind of the outer rim of the 2020-era mcyt streamer content following.
The funny thing is there's not really 'rules' for how to be on critblr as much as rules for how to be on main (people who are on mainstream, visible accounts and can be seen by the CCs) that people on critblr tend to break. As a sub-group it's kind of not held together by much other than gossip, and some of the blogs here wouldn't be considered that out of the ordinary years ago before we got "boundary culture" where people got more careful with what they said or did in high traffic, cc-visible spaces. Overall (to shorten the lore a lot) critblr happened because the forced positivity / happiness mandate of main was too narrow and caused a backlash. Now it's worth giving you the heads up that parts of critblr are associated with doxxing and fishing for personal / ‘forbidden’ information, so this is a sketchy part of town. (Mage fact: I actually didn't figure this one out until a bit after I made a blog, whoops.)
I do something very specific by crit blog standards, I use what I know about Enneagram types to cross-reference why people act the way they do. My 'skills' (if I can call them that) are based on a handful of books and like 10 years of observing people in the wild-- this entire blog has been me trying to put that to use/words so I'm not sure if I could do a general enneagram outline beyond what I've written here.
I'm also not sure if I have all-around advice for developing intuition / noticing patterns beyond giving yourself the chance/permission to do so? Psych (even pseudo psych) is a massive rabbit hole and it can take a while to learn things, let alone start getting useful results from them. One of the things about streamers is it truly is just you observing them for hours. If you start to notice a pattern or a logic to what you're seeing, or on the opposite end are confused and want to know more, that can be a good place to start your 'search.'
If you feel you have opinions or insight into what those two are like, feel free to give it a try, as long as you think it's worth it. Critblr is a bit less popular than it used to be so there might be some blogging into the void, but people tend to appreciate good posts.
#Word of warning as well#it can be kind of hard to turn this instinct off once you have it#i've been in another fandom lately and I noticed that I was trying to puzzle out this guy on reflex#even though I largely intended to take a break#I may never really shut off from this but that may just be me#gcldrvsh08
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From this post
You understand the characters and setting. When reading your fics, I believe the elements you add beyond cannon. Further, your character’s actions are the most in-character versions I’ve read.
District 12 is a grim place. Your words convey that but infuse a warmth/nostalgia that make it feel oddly beautiful.
I’ve loved them all!
Oh wow!! Seriously this is the most wonderful set of compliments!! Thank you anon!
My main goal is to write the kind of story I’d like to read.
Before I discovered fanfic I spent a ridiculous amount of time working on character analyses for Katniss and Peeta. Like I wrote essays. I spent months pouring over the books to glean as much insight into them as I could. One of the many things that I love about the books is that we get a limited view of what’s going on, but lots of clues to piece together so much more narrative.
When I first started reading fanfic I’d sometimes come across stories with characters that were so ooc that I couldn’t keep reading the fic. So that was a pet peeve before I ever considered writing my own stories.
The unfortunate side to that, for me anyways, is it makes the writing torturously slow. I’m either constantly overthinking every word or I’m free flowing and have to edit a bunch because I’ve written something ooc (because I just want these two lovebirds to be happy already).
When I write chapters for The Awkward In-Between I kind of write them in layers. I probably go through 3-4 edits of adding, removing, switching around dialogue or narrative to increase the flow. I like to set the scene, like when she goes into the dress makers shop it’s vaguely dusty smelling because it’s 12 and even merchants can’t afford new clothes often.
I constantly reference the source material, specifically quotes that I feel are key to defining the characters, or defining how they feel. I’m also constantly thinking about the story structure and how certain moments are underlined with their importance based on where they’ve taken place in the narrative. I’ll probably write a post on this particular point in the next week.
I stumbled across a post earlier this week where someone asked if Peeta was fighting for his love for Katniss in 13 or if he’d given up. They wondered about the love triangle and why Katniss was so awful to Peeta. I think they were specifically asking from a movie perspective, which is just such a different beast than the books because we don’t get any of Katniss’s inner monologue and there’s not a great way to get across what she’s thinking/feeling without voiceover. Anyway, their questions got me thinking all week about how I interpret the text and how I’d answer their questions. Hence the post I’ll be making soon.
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With the 2024 "season" of Death Battle now two weeks behind us, I think it's about time I give my thoughts on and rank all the episodes. But unlike last year, I won't be doing a whole tier list for them. There's only four episodes, so why bother? So instead, I'll be going more in-depth on my thoughts instead of just a simple sentence or quip.
So, without further ado...
4: Omni-Man vs Bardock (6.5/10)
This honestly didn't feel like the best foot to start on after the big hiatus. The analyses felt like they were trying to rush through everything (especially on Nolan's end), the models were exceptionally shiny and kind of ugly (ESPECIALLY on Nolan's end), the animation felt too sporadic to really get a grasp on what was happening, the ending felt hella abrupt, and the outcome's explanation... HOO BOY! Hell, even the music I have gripes with. I don't exactly like how it was basically "Diabolical Invincible Me 2" and would have preferred more of a lean towards Solid State Scouter, especially since this might be the only time we'll ever SEE Bardock on the show. I'm not sure I would have even led the return with OmniDock as a whole, as it doesn't feel like that big a matchup to do it with. Though I will say that this episode having a huge-ass controversy based off the outcome certainly made it feel like the show never left.
3: Among Us vs Fall Guys (7/10)
In all honesty, I didn't think I'd like this episode. The DBcast they did on it a few years back made it feel like an absolute trainwreck of a debate, so when it was revealed after Bowser vs Eggman, I was like Patrick in the Valentines episode of SpongeBob; my face just dropped into a hard frown. But after the episode itself, it at least felt like the most "fun" of the four. Both the analysis and the fight had a good few gags that got a chuckle out of me (Like when the Impostor's knife couldn't stab Pink. Though the Among Us call in the rundown did drag for a bit too long). A lot of people are calling this episode "peak fiction" which, while it's certainly not bad... no. The other two are far closer to that claim.
2: Bowser vs Eggman (9/10)
Unlike SusGuys, I certainly understand where people come from when they call this episode "peak fiction". The fight was absolutely bonkers and hype all in one, with some of the best rig animation I've seen from the show. Like, the part where Metal takes out Bowser Jr. and Bowser goes full Will Smith mode with the backing track of Game Over going full hype choir was one of the hardest moments in the show since UI-Kaioken-Kamehameha vs Sun-dipped Supes. It also has the bonus of showing that Metal Sonic is, in fact, the GOAT, as well as Infinite getting Thwomped somehow reaching big meme status (It got on LIMC. That's never happened with DB before!). Although, there were a few questions that the episode left me that I'm not entirely certain on. A few for example include "Why did Eggman's arsenal seemingly not include the Master Emerald?" or "Is King Boo really a part of Bowser's army? I thought the Boos were their own faction". But nevertheless, this episode was amazing. Though not as amazing to me as...
1: Joker vs Giorno (9.1/10)
To steal a line from memes "This is brilliant, but I like this". Even if I went into this dreading the outcome since this is one of the most toxic vs debates known to the internet, as well as GER being the certain type of OP that just isn't fun (Like Bugs Bunny), it still produced something incredibly cool. The analyses were fun and I liked the running gag of Godfather and Goodfellas references in Gio's, with the fight being the epitome of one specific word: STYLE. The way Joker's Persona's and Gold Experience's life abilities is so damn stylish and cool. Hell, even the fight music, Requiem for a Thief, with the idea of mixing Last Surprise with Il Vento D'oro is the purest example of "Oh we GROOVIN'!" in music ever. And the way Joker broke out of GER's Infinite Death Loop and fired back with Sinful Shell... fuckin' immaculate. Like Joker said, "We never saw it coming"
Why didn't they lead with THIS one instead?
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