#i emphasized how everyone has been VERY nice to me and VERY professional

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 129

so after a year and a half they're sentencing the dude who carjacked me, and they want my opinion on a few things. i am doing my best not to make them regret this.

[hoperays-song]

Character Deep Dive: Klaus, Ryan and the Dance Troupe

Finally, it is done! I hope y’all enjoy this deep dive!! Just please read the trigger warnings first. Seriously, read the trigger warnings first. Cannot stress that enough. Also shout out to my beta readers, y’all are amazing!!!

- <3 Gooseless

Character Deep Dive: Klaus, Ryan and the Dance Troupe

*TW: This deep dive will mention abuse, grooming, misuse of power, and manipulation. All the events and actions mentioned are based on real world events told to me by friends in the dance industry and my personal experience and research into the industry as well. However, this is just a theory based on my analysis and the analysis done by others. No hate to the people who actually like this character. Again, just a theory. Also, there were two attempted murders on screen as well as implying other murders had taken place in the second movie, so I feel like this theory (while very dark) isn’t the darkest the series could go and is therefore not that out of place. DO NOT READ IF SENSITIVE TO ANYTHING PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED. Also, no, this is not Klaus friendly. What about anything I’ve ever posted would make you think it is? That man gave me multiple panic attacks and made me go back to therapy for a bit because it reminded me of stuff, so nope, not going to be friendly. *

 As someone who was in dance my entire childhood and was raised by someone who was a dancer for 14 years, I always enjoy watching the representation of the dance world in media. I’m constantly looking for small details that allude to the real-world dance culture and I was ecstatic to note that in Sing 2 we got to see some of those cultural aspects as well as a wide range of diversity within the dance class itself. However, less than forty seconds in, I noticed what would become my main issue with the movie itself, the character Klaus. 

Klaus’s actions were shown to be antagonistic and cruel, yes, but the fact that they were brushed off at the end of the movie to allow him to continue to work with a student he was shown on screen to physically, verbally, and emotionally abuse for the simple reason of “he now knows what he’s capable of and won’t underestimate him again after that performance”. The thing with Klaus is that the major issue wasn’t his underestimating of Johnny’s abilities, it was the very blatant abuse and belittlement that was a constant part of his class. It was bad enough to cause Johnny to have at least one panic attack, and that’s Johnny. A kid who was raised in an extremely high stress situation and is used to being dragged through Buster’s bad and typically very dangerous ideas. Within the course of the first movie, we saw him chased by cops, trapped in a flooding building, and face down a group of potentially dangerous gang members. And while he seemed more than slightly worried and a good bit scared in some of those scenes, it was never enough to cause him to have a panic attack (at least not onscreen).

Yet, when you put him in Klaus’s class for two weeks and he ends up having panic attacks and is clearly extremely burnt out to the point other characters start to notice. You have to ask, what is going on there? Well, after analyzing (probably way too much) everything about Klaus and the dancers I could and doing a ton of research, this is the conclusion I’ve drawn.

 Analysis and Allegations

The actions we see from the character Klaus are far from just concerning. Not only do we see Klaus verbally berate and belittle his students, but we also see him physically hit them. No matter what modern media tells you, these are not normal in the dance world. That’s just blatant verbal, emotional, and physical abuse> It should not be tolerated or seen as normal under any circumstances. And, what’s worse is Johnny’s almost definitely not the youngest in that room. One of them, yes, but most likely not the absolute youngest. Most professional dancers report their first official contract at the age of 18. However, troupes are known to have members as young as 15 years old. And since Klaus was hired as choreographer and was able to produce a troupe on such short notice (literally canonically overnight), those are probably all his current students, meaning those kids could be as young as 12 (the age when most professional dancers report starting to circle the professional sphere, however dance classes can start as young as 2 years old). That is further backed up by the fact that every student stayed.

Now I understand that that statement itself might seem weird, however, contrary to popular opinion, dancers are some of the most terrifying people I have ever had the genuine pleasure of meeting. It’s a cut-throat industry and dancers are a lot of times forced to learn to stand up for themselves against abusive choreographers and directors that don’t actually value them. Most dancers I know would have just walked out the moment they saw how Klaus was treating the others, let alone if he started treating them that way. It’s very much an industry based on self-worth to survive. So, the fact that everyone in that class stayed told me that not only were they used to Klaus’s abuse, but they were also more than likely conditioned to take it. 

Like I said, most dancers tend to be extremely good at sticking up for themselves. Sadly however, as in the majority of athletics industries, grooming is a huge problem in dance. As I previously mentioned, dance classes can start as young as 2 years old with most professional dancers reporting to have started seriously training at the 4–6-year-old range. That means that young children, I can’t emphasize that enough that these are children, are being exposed to Klaus’s abuse on a daily basis (Choreographers typically are also teachers at a dance school and since anyone with common sense would fire him to avoid a lawsuit, I would believe that Klaus owns the school). And as anyone who has interacted with a child before can attest, they are incredibly trusting. So, if they were told by an authority figure that they’ve been told they can trust, like say a teacher, that something is normal and not a big deal and they’re lucky enough to have a nice teacher as others are worse, they’re going to believe it.

Even if as they get older and realize that they were lied to and are in fact being mistreated, a lot of times they feel trapped or have no support systems outside of the people involved in the bad situation. Especially if you have been going to a specialized school where everyone around you has been going through the same thing and your contact with people outside it is extremely limited. This can be made worse by the power held by higher ups in the dance industry (choreographers, casting directors, etc.). Those higher ups completely control the lifeline of everything in the industry. One bad word from one can seriously be a career ender. Not only that, but those people tend to be more successful, more in the public eye, and therefore can sway public opinion against whoever might have spoken up with ease as well as making court cases where poor dancers are going up against vastly successful higher ups a literal nightmare for the dancers. A lot of times they cannot afford a good attorney and will end up losing the case or being hushed by settlements that they desperately need due to a lack of work.  

         Therefore, I believe that even if Klaus’s abuse of his students has been brought to light before, it more than likely was swept under the rug. And I believe his abuse of Johnny was evidence proving that theory. Why? Well, Johnny is different than every other student in that room. Not just because he’s never danced before, but because he is not a permeant member of Klaus’s Troupe. He’s only there for the run of the show. And if you are struggling to see why that might be important, let me explain. Johnny has no stake in Klaus’s success. He will not be affected if Klaus’s name is dragged through the mud. He will not be out of a job if Klaus is fired. What Johnny is, as Klaus and every member of that Troupe must know, is a close, personal friend of the director and absolutely can affect their employment status if he wants. He can have them fired and replaced with a different group the next day if he really wanted to beg Buster for a new teacher. Klaus knew this and still chose to target and abuse Johnny. He knew how risky that was and he still did it. That shows to me that he’s gotten away with that kind of thing before. He’s more than likely done this to several other rookies and not faced consequences. And if he’s willing to do it to them, people with no reliance on his success, he definitely is willing to do it to his students, who are relying on him for essentially everything. If Klaus’s reputation is ruined, so is theirs and their resume will probably not get them as far. If Klaus goes under, they suddenly are out of jobs in a city known for its competitive performing job market. If they speak up, they’ll be fired, and Klaus’s reputation will absolutely carry him through any court case they may try. They are very likely end up homeless and hungry if they lose their jobs with him. Klaus has all the power. And he knows it.

         Those are the primary reasons I believe that not only did Klaus physically, verbally, emotionally, and mentally abuse his students, he more than likely is guilty of several much more sinister crimes like grooming and misuse of power.

 Ryan, The Primary Victim

          This part of my theory is where it gets a little more intricate. In dance, there’s a role in most organizations known as the Principal Dancer. The Principal Dancer is the top dancer in that company and frequently are given not only solos but starring roles in shows the company is hired to perform. Starting to sound familiar? That’s because that’s exactly what we see happen to Ryan. Ryan is given the role of being Johnny’s dance partner in the duet, one of the starring roles in the scene of a show being put on by a head of the entertainment industry. However, when we look at the students during this announcement, none of them look surprised. Ryan seems to have been the choice that everyone was expecting. On top of that, Ryan is the only one of Klaus’s students to publicly receive praise in front of the others, something that again doesn’t seem to surprise anyone. Klaus wasn’t doing that just to make Johnny feel bad (he would have pointed out how other students were doing better than him too), he clearly has praised Ryan before. Ryan is Klaus’s Principal Dancer. And upon realizing that, I immediately started to worry for him.

         Principal Dancers are often used as the example for all other students to follow. They stand at the head of the barre during warmups and help other students during practice. They can even help the teacher/choreographer with the choreography and the class overall. Essentially, they can tend to take on the role of a teaching assistant. And rather unsurprisingly at this point, we see Ryan doing just that during the practice scenes. While we never see them doing group warmups on barre, we do see Ryan seemingly helping another student correct their pose when Johnny shows up late for class. In fact, he’s the only student not doing those poses and is instead walking between the others as if checking what they’re doing. He also then proceeds to do the fight scene choreography perfectly. And while we might be meant to brush that off as “oh, he’s a talented dancer, of course he can do the choreo perfectly”, I’m here to tell you that essentially no one can do choreo absolutely perfectly on their first full run through. And that’s what it’s hinted at being, especially for Ryan. Johnny might have learned bits and pieces of the fight scene choreo before that point, however, Ryan’s role was announced in that very scene, and he was still able to do the choreography perfectly. That means that Ryan had practiced that choreo before, more than likely numerous times till he was able to do it flawlessly. And that means, he was more than likely practicing alone, or at least without Johnny (a neutral third party who would note and potentially protest any abuse), with Klaus.

         We know that Klaus has hit his students before, hell we see him do it multiple times in the movie itself, and we know that he also verbally and emotionally berates his students on the regular. We can see by how his students react to this, how scared they look, that they too are targets. And statistically, the person closest to the abuser is typically their primary victim. In this instance, we know the person closest to Klaus within the troupe is Ryan.

         What’s more, the behaviors of Ryan and Klaus within the movie hint to this fact as well (this is probably where I go into over analysis but I’m too far deep in this rabbit hole now so). For starters, let’s look at the scene where Johnny, Buster, and Gunter enter the training room. The first thought that blared through my mind was their shoes. If you didn’t know, street shoes are not allowed on practice room floors, like ever. It can wear down the flooring and therefore make it extremely dangerous for the dancers. So, the fact that the dancers didn’t say anything in of itself was odd, but then again, the Principal Dancer might have been the one expected to speak up in that instance since it involved the show’s director. Speaking of the Principal Dancer, Ryan is the one dancer we do not see in that opening scene. He’s nowhere to be found and neither is Klaus. Now, Klaus being gone on the first day of a show isn’t that surprising. Choreographers have a lot of people they have to talk to such as the director, the publicity manager, the wardrobe department, etc. but Ryan being missing is odd. For one, he would technically be, at least honorarily judging by the troupe’s dynamic, in charge while Klaus is gone, and two, there’s no way they didn’t know they would be getting their new dancer (Johnny) that morning. Having no one there to formally met him or tell him the expectations would spell disaster to a cohesive first practice. And yet Ryan is missing. He could have just stepped out for a moment, true, or been helping Klaus with something, but we never see him being treated as an assistant choreographer so that seems a bit far-fetched to me. Therefore, I have chosen to believe theory three: he wasn’t allowed to be there.

         Now some of you might realize where this theory is headed, but still, let’s keep going. Why wouldn’t a Principal Dancer, the top performer in the company, be allowed to be there when the new student was introduced for the first time? I don’t think it was due to the new student, it was due to who would be there with him. Johnny didn’t walk into that practice studio alone, he walked in with the director and the screen writer, two people of power on set. What’s more is that those two are currently being backed by one of the heads of the biggest entertainment industries in what’s hinted at being the world. They have power and they can use it. If Ryan would have said something to them, perhaps warning them of what Klaus is like or asking for help, they would immediately have them removed from the show and done anything in their power to help Ryan. Therefore, Klaus kept Ryan close or might have even sent him out to do something to avoid him saying anything that could hurt his image. And what’s more, I think Ryan would have. Let’s look at Ryan’s behaviors throughout the movie now, shall we?

         First off, I will admit Ryan is a character with one to two lines and a surprisingly limited amount of screen time for actually being decently important to the plot (though he might have more/close to the same amount screen time than Alfonso if I remember correctly. I’ll have to check.). The first time we actually see Ryan, it’s at Crystal’s Auditions. However, he’s not auditioning. From what I can see (and common fan theories) he’s there to support someone, maybe a friend, maybe a child of a sponsor of the dance company. And he’s also more than likely supposed to be networking for the company as well, getting these potential rich sponsors to like him enough to support Klaus’s company. That is a job assigned to Principal Dancers at certain companies after all. In the scene where we see Ryan, we actually notice him mostly paying attention to Johnny (yes, I do ship them, no, that is not where this is going, nice try). In fact, we see him look him up and down and watch him the entire time he’s in the room. Why is that important for non-shipping reasons? Because there is no way Ryan did not recognize Johnny the next day when he showed up in Klaus’s class. He saw him as a janitor and the next time he sees him apparently his director is friends with Clay Calloway, and they can put on an award-winning show with only three weeks of prep? Yeah, there’s no way Ryan didn’t know that wasn’t a lie. He knew they snuck in. And he didn’t say anything. Klaus would have absolutely used that as ammo against Johnny if he knew and we don’t know enough about the other troupe members to know if they would have told him if Ryan had mentioned it, so it’s a decently safe assumption that he didn’t say a word. He was willing to protect them and their secrets, no questions asked.                                                                                           

         Now, onto where we actually see a fair bit of Ryan, the dance classes. This is where we finally see Ryan being acknowledged as the Principal Dancer as well as a surprising amount of his personality. For starters, we can tell he’s extremely patient and dedicated. He never seems annoyed or upset that Johnny’s struggling so much to the point they have to go long. He is just calm and steady, doing the choreo over and over again the exact same way so Johnny can get used to the same movements. He also has clearly been dancing since he was a kid to reach the rank of Principal Dancer when he’s as young as he is (I always though he and Johnny were close in age, 18-19 years old). So, what do we now know about Ryan? That he’s trustworthy, patient, and very dedicated.

         Now on to why this personality we see hints to Ryan actually being a threat to Klaus’s reputation. Ryan doesn’t act like Klaus. And why does that mean Ryan doesn’t agree with Klaus’s views? Well, a lot of times when people of similar ideologies and behaviors are together, they amplify those traits in each other (think about things like political rallies or groups of friends). Or think of how couples who have been together a long time develop the same habits or how kids mimic their caretakers (and since Ryan is Klaus’s Principal Dancer and probably been training with him for years that probably the closest fit). However, Ryan’s mannerisms and personality seem to be the exact opposites of his teacher’s. He’s even willing to sneak into Crystal Theatre to help them put on the show apparently behind Klaus’s back, seeming to lead the other students there. He doesn’t align himself with his teacher’s ideology towards Johnny at all. In fact, we see him being extremely supportive of the other boy during the show and practices. At this point, it’s pretty clear to me that Ryan has definitely grown disillusioned with whatever Klaus probably told him as a young student and in fact seems to rebel against his teacher’s wishes constantly. He wouldn’t have held back if he had been alone with Buster and Gunter that day. He would have warned them.

         You might be asking “So if this is the case, why hasn’t Klaus fired him then?” Well, simple, sponsors. Remember how I said earlier that Principal Dancers are commonly used for networking between different troupes? Well, as we can observe, Ryan seems to be a very friendly and outgoing guy. He seems like the kind of person who can make friends quickly and easily. And while that is great for making those networking connections, it also means those connections are more than likely fonder of Ryan, a cheerful and friendly young adult, then Klaus, who is shown to be a perfectionist and egotistical. If Klaus was to fire Ryan (especially since I don’t think Ryan would sign an NDA), Ryan would more than likely go to those sponsors and ask for help. He likely could financially cripple the troupe if he wanted to. Klaus is kinda stuck with him at this point.

         And that being stuck with him, especially since Ryan is almost definitely under contract, spells worse news for Ryan. If he leaves and breaks contract, he can be sued, and that lawsuit would probably destroy his future in the dance industry. And if he stays, Klaus more than likely is going to target him even more to try to eliminate the chances of Ryan saying anything (gaslighting, scarily common these days). Ryan is trapped between abuse and essentially financial desolation for the foreseeable future.

        That wraps up by deep dive into the theory that sprung to life after watching the interactions and behaviors of the dance troupe and Klaus in Sing 2. And in the case of a TL:DR scenario, I believe that Klaus has committed much worse crimes than what we’re shown on screen and I believe that Ryan is his primary victim.

[dsknsk]

Archetype names and me

In this post I'll come across all archetypes one by one and explain the reasoning behind the name I use for them. This will be under the cut because this will be a long post.

I know that the official name is actually branches, but the name archetype has been used since the past so that is the name I have been consistently using.

Vanguards

Pioneer Vanguards -> DP-on-Skill Vanguards. Why I do not use the canon name: A 'pioneer' is someone who is the first one to explore an unknown land and start something there, and metaphorically, the first person to really get into a certain thing professionally (i.e one could call Marie Curie a pioneer in radioactive science). In the sense of Vanguards it's the first sense and it is really vague because it is the job of Vanguards in general, not just this archetype. Why I use the other name: This explains what they do quickly, namely, their DP is gained from their skills instead of from anything else like passive effects. While one could argue that other archetypes also do this, this name does bring to mind the most common Vanguard type. On the other hand, the 'Pioneers' are also a faction in the game lore.

For me this archetype is split into two subtypes: the Offensive and the Defensive. This is a matter of skills and their basic stat spread. Examples of Offensive DP-on-Skill Vanguards are Scavenger, Siege and Fang. Examples of Defensive DP-on-Skill Vanguards are Courier and Zima.

Charger Vanguards -> DP-on-Kill Vanguards. Why I do not use the canon name: It does not tell anything about what the archetype is supposed to do. Do they charge forward in battle? Do they charge you by filling your DP that they fuel from kills? Unsure. Why I use the other name: It complements the DP-on-Skill Vanguards and forms a nice little touch that they are different from them. Due to this little difference it does emphasize the word 'kill' from it and that perfectly encapsulates the fact that they are pretty much always geared towards getting that kill.

Standardbearer Vanguards -> Flagbearer Vanguards. Why I do not use the canon name: 'Standard' is a very old fashioned term for a flag. Pretty much no one uses the word 'standard' to refer to a flag consistently. Why I use the other name: It's the name everyone knows them as being. It's also a whole lot shorter.

Tactician Vanguards -> Reinforcement Vanguards. Why I do not use the canon name: The 'tactician' thing about them is the spot you place their summon on, which is referred to as a 'tactical point'. I remember this term needlessly confusing a lot of people back when Beanstalk was released. Thus... Why I use the other name: The place you put the summon on can be as tactical or untactical how you want it yourself. Instead I emphasized the thing that really makes them different: Their summon. Even if we get other kinds of ranged Vanguards later, the word 'Reinforcement' still sets them apart.

Agent Vanguards -> Fast-Redeploy Vanguards. Why I do not use the canon name: Once again, the term is vague. It sounds like they go undercover to spy on the enemy? Which is not really what they do? Why I use the other name: It took me the longest while to come up with this one because they are kind of a weird archetype. I didn't know what to focus on but focusing on their elongated range and ranged attacks would get confusion with the above archetype, so I focused on their short redeployment time and made them fit within the same theme as their Specialist counterpart.

Snipers

Marksmen Snipers -> Anti-Air Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: A marksman is a simple term for a male person who uses long-ranged weaponry. It's not gender-inclusive and most Snipers of this archetype are female anyway. Why I use the other name: It was sort of also the name they were used to be known as. I could also have said them as ST (single-target) Snipers but many other Snipers are that too, so their focus is on their Anti-Air property, which is also seen in their modules.

Artillerymen Snipers -> AoE Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: An artillery piece already brings the idea of the use of a larger piece of equipment but that's all. Technically the equipment of many Snipers not even in this archetype is artillery. Also not gender-inclusive. Why I use the other name: It was the name everyone used for them in the past, it describes their difference with the rest well, and it's short, so why change it? I also accept 'Burst' for this one, or 'False AoE', since that's what they actually do.

Heavyshooter Snipers -> Point Blanc Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: To prevent confusion with another Sniper archetype. Why I use the other name: Frankly this one was chosen from their description that's actually a bit wonky, 'highly accurate Point Blanc shot' (it doesn't matter bc in this game most attacks just hit 100% unless the enemy has dodge). It went on to become more fitting later with the module that gives them benefits when the target is directly in front of them, i.e at Point Blanc range.

Spreadshooter Snipers -> Cardinal Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: No particular reason, I was too used to my own name for them. Why I use the other name: This one is taken from their range at base; which is a + sign with themselves being at one point (and not in the middle, but that's irrelevant). The four tiles around an operator are also called their cardinal tiles, and even though these Snipers are not in the middle the imagery should be obvious. I admit this one is a little weak since they change their range at E2.

Deadeye Snipers -> Wide-Range Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: Gives no real idea of what the archetype uses to differentiate themselves. Why I use the other name: It names the most important trait this archetype uses to differentiate itself. Basically the polar opposite. They have a wide range. That's it. Oh, and it was also their old fandom name.

Besieger Snipers -> Heavyweight Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: What do they besiege? A fucking city? Not all of them have besieging equipment anyway. Why I use the other name: Calls out their priority target quite god. Also to give an idea of their attacks being 'heavy', as in slow but hard-hitting. This was also their old name.

Flinger Snipers -> Anti-Ground Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: I actually did until later on. That's when I saw that this one stood out like a sore thumb by not being descriptive other than that they throw stuff. Which is not relevant for combat. Why I use the other name: I came up with this one after I thought what their actual intended usage is. Since they cannot hit aerial targets, I thought them as a sort of antithesis to Anti-Air Snipers. Hence, Anti-Ground.

Hunter Snipers -> Reloading Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: Vague and undescriptive. What do you even expect from this name? Them to be good at hunting animals in Reclamation Algorithm? Why I use the other name: I went to see their trait that lets them reload their ammo when they're idle, et voila.

Loopshooter Snipers -> Returning Snipers Why I do not use the canon name: They shoot...in a loop? You'd expect their ammunition to make a loop before returning to them, right? Nope, they hit the first enemy they come across and then return instead of having a fixed loop. Why I use the other name: Because their ammunition returns to them.

Guards

Fighter Guards -> Brawler Guards Why I do not use the canon name: Technically everyone who goes to battle to fight is a fighter. How vague. Why I use the other name: It was their old name and I really liked it. It gives you a sense of a bar fight, of someone who uses their fists instead of tactics.

Lord Guards -> Ranged Guards Why I do not use the canon name: Because I simply do not get why they felt the need to give this one a completely obscure name that doesn't describe what they do. Also not gender-inclusive. Why I use the other name: Everyone and their mother used it and still does, simply because it neatly describes their capability.

Dreadnought Guards -> Duelist Guards Why I do not use the canon name: They...are fearless? Okay, so what does that imply for them in battle? They aren't ships either. It's also the name of the Beagle skin iirc. Why I use the other name: Because it was their old name and because they are made to duel certain enemies one-on-one.

Swordsmaster Guards -> Dualstrike Guards Why I do not use the canon name: Pretty much all Guards that aren't Brawlers or AoE use swords. Go figure. Why I use the other name: It was their previous name and because they hit twice for one attack.

Liberator Guards -> Idle Guards Why I do not use the canon name: What do they even liberate in the game? Why I use the other name: To complement the other archetypes that stand there menacingly until their skills are turned on.

Centurion Guards -> AoE Guards Why I do not use the canon name: Come on, this isn't ancient Rome. Why I use the other name: Neatly describes them hitting up to 3 enemies (or 2, in the case of poor Popukar) and it's their old name.

Arts Fighter Guards -> Arts Guards Why I do not use their canon name: The 'fighter' suffix was completely unnecessary and was only put in to make all of the archetype names descriptors. Why I use the other name: It was their old name and also shorter.

Instructor Guards -> Support Guards Why I do not use their canon name: It's a nice illustrative touch to how they apply their buffs and their lore role but it doesn't really give you more than a vague idea what they are like. Why I use the other name: It was their old name and shows that they are there to give support to others, and they are not typically made to fight at the frontlines themselves.

Musha/Soloblade Guards -> Lone Wolf Guards Why I do not use their canon name: I've always detested 'musha' as the sole foreign word that's an obscure Japanese term for a swordsperson. Again, nearly all Guards use swords. 'Soloblade' is admittedly a good step towards their true role. Why I use the other name: I think I've hit a good spot with this name. I didn't want to use a reference to another game I personally do not play or like, or call them zombies because that's even less of a descriptor. These Guards tend to work alone, without healing and with minimal support. Their kits try to sustain themselves by scaling off of their damage, meaning that being supported by someone next to them killing enemies works against their gimmick of getting health back per kill. In other words, they are, well, Lone Wolves.

Reaper Guards -> AoE Lone Wolf Guards Why I do not use the canon name: Too fucking edgy. Seriously I nearly cut my finger when I heard this. Why I use the other name: They work like Lone Wolf Guards, but with an AoE instead of a single target.

Crusher Guards -> Sacrificial Guards Why I do not use the canon name: Too generic. Why I use the other name: Because I thought that it would paint a nice image. They sacrifice their DEF and RES for a large attack stat. Of course, this in practice means sacrificing too much.

Defenders

Protector Defenders -> Core or Normal Defenders Why I do not use the canon name: 'Protector' is LITERALLY a synonym for 'Defender'. Why I use the other name: It was sorta kinda their old name which I get because if you see it now you can already figure that they aren't specifically geared towards anything except defense.

Guardian Defenders -> Healing Defenders Why I do not use the canon name: 'Guardian' is ANOTHER synonym for 'Defender'. Why I use the other name: It was their old name and describes their job well.

Arts Protector Defenders -> Arts Defenders Why I do not use the canon name: See note about Arts Guards. Why I use the other name: Also see note about Arts Guards.

Juggernaut Defenders -> Lone Wolf Defenders Why I do not use the canon name: The word 'juggernaut' has always looked so incredibly silly. I know it's supposed to sound badass, like a chariot no one can stop and wrecks havoc. But it just sounds and looks so unserious. Why I use the other name: They fall within the same category as Lone Wolf Guards and AoE Lone Wolf Guards, signified by the drop of blood in their sigil. Together they form a group that's called Lone Wolves.

Duelist Defenders = Duelist Defenders Why I did not change anything: For one, I think this term describes them pretty well. They are clearly thought to be the Defender counterpart to Duelist Guards.

Fortress Defenders -> Backline Defenders Why I do not use the canon name: I get where they come from, seriously. It paints an image of them being inside a fortress and shooting from the fortress at an enemy from afar. But it isn't really clear, so... Why I use the other name: I clarified it a little bit and referred to the position they are meant to sit in battle, which is your backline, even though they are Defenders, they focus on their ranged attacks.

Sentinel Protector Defenders -> Longshot Defenders Why I do not use the canon name: Man, stop putting 'protector' on it to indicate they're derived from the basic Defender archetype, because they're not. Why I use the other name: This one was actually the name they were planned to be given at the first anniversary.

Casters

Core Casters -> Single Target (ST) Casters Why I do not use the canon name: I get that this is supposed to be the most basic Caster type there is but in contrast to Defenders it doesn't describe more than that. Why I use the other name: It was their old name. Simple as that.

Splash Casters -> AoE Casters Why I do not use the canon name: Why cannot they hold consistency when it comes to naming AoE archetypes? Why I use the other name: Brings to mind the other AoE archetypes. I also accept 'Burst' or 'False AoE', similar to their Sniper counterpart.

Phalanx Casters -> Idle Casters Why I do not use the canon name: Most people do not know what a phalanx is. It's a group of things tightly knitted together. Maybe it indicates that they want a group of enemies all bunched up? But any given AoE operator likes that. Why I use the other name: Because when their skills are not activated, they stand there menacingly. Also to refer to their Supporter counterpart.

Mech-Accord Casters -> Drone Casters Why I do not use the canon name: Admit it, 'mech-accord' is a made up term to say 'they have a drone with them' Why I use the other name: Short and sweet and their old name.

Chain Casters = Chain Casters. Why I did not change anything: Because the name is perfectly fine. And it was their old name.

Mystic Casters -> Storage Casters Why I do not use the canon name: Doesn't do anything but add mystery to them. Perceived mystery, that is. Why I use the other name: Because they function like a storage for their attacks; they store charges until they can fire them.

Blast Caster -> Shredder Casters Why I do not use the canon name: Too similar to AoE/Burst Casters, and they are different because they are true AoE. Why I use the other name: I came up with it when we only had Ifrit, actually. Their attacks go through all visible enemies and Ifrit in particular can just shred anything on her path.

Primal Casters -> Elemental Casters Why I do not use the canon name: 'Primal' has that slight exotification whiff to it. Why I use the other name: To signify they're in the 'Elemental' group, along with their Medic and Supporter counterparts.

Medics

Medic Medics -> Single Target (ST) Medics Why I do not use the canon name: Do I really have to answer this? Why I use the other name: It's the name everyone and their mother uses and has been using.

Multi-Target Medics -> AoE Medics Why I do not use the canon name: It's a longwinded term for what's simply AoE. Why I use the other name: Because this is a short and handy term everyone has been using. It also hearkens back on all other AoE operators.

Therapist Medics -> Wide-Range Medics Why I do not use the canon name: What about them is therapist? Why I use the other name: Like their Sniper counterpart, this one actually describes their wider range as their selling point which is also what others have been using.

Wandering Medics -> Elemental Medics Why I do not use the canon name: None of them are wandering. The only medic that wanders is Whisperain and she isn't even in this archetype! Why I use the other name: They were the first to do anything related to Elemental damage and were thus the first to set up the group.

Incantation Medics -> Combat Medics Why I do not use the canon name: Okay, they use Arts, but other than that, what for? You can also use an incantation to heal, so...? Why I use the other name: There's a trope called the combat medic and they neatly fall within that, because they actually have a combat operator's prioritization instead of that of any other medic.

Chain Medics = Chain Medics Why I did not change anything: It's a good descriptive term that hearkens back on their Caster counterparts which directly gives you an idea of their kit.

Supporters

Decel Binder Supporters -> Slow(er) Supporters Why I do not use the canon name: Because this change is obviously an unnecessary fancy way to say the same thing. 'Decel' = deceleration, i.e going slower and 'binder' is just there to reinforce the notion. Why I use the other name: Much more concise as it's their old name.

Abjurer Supporters -> Buff(er) Supporters Why I do not use the canon name: I do not know what an abjurer is or how it's relevant. Why I use the other name: As an antithesis to the archetype below.

Hexer Supporters -> Debuff(er) Supporters Why I do not use the canon name: It paints that stereotypical picture of a 'weird' person putting curses on you. Why I use the other name: As an antithesis to the archetype above.

Summoner Supporters -> Summon(er) Supporters Why I pretty much didn't change anything: Because it's their old name and a good descriptor of what their main hat is.

Bard Supporters -> Idle Supporters Why I do not use their canon name: Heidi isn't even a singer. Also 'bard' is a term that brings up a masculine picture. Why I use the other name: I also accept 'Aura' for this one equally well since both that name and my name describes what their main role is. Their range functions as an aura around them and meanwhile they just stand there menacingly, not doing anything.

Artificer Supporters -> Engineer Supporters Why I do not use their canon name: I simply changed it out for a somewhat more known term. Why I use the other name: It's also partially a reference to TF2 to the class that builds and maintains turrets.

Ritualist Supporter -> Elemental Supporters Why I do not use their canon name: Clear exotification. Why I use the other name: To show that this archetype is part of the group that interacts with Elemental damage.

Specialists

Hookmaster Specialists -> Pull(er) Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: Not only can they be shortened to 'hookers', Gladiia doesn't use a hook. Why I use their other name: It's their old name.

Push Stroker Specialists -> Push(er) Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: Seriously, what's with Shift Specialists and innuendo? Why I use their other name: It's their old name.

Merchant Specialists -> DP-Drain Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: It paints a nice picture but doesn't really work. Most of them indeed have something you can say is a stall but Swalter doesn't really count for this one as she just murks the enemy with money to fuck off. Why I use their other name: Describes their most important characteristic.

Ambusher Specialists -> Controller Speicalists Why I do not use their canon name: I've been using this name for another archetype. Why I use their other name: Despite it not being entirely accurate anymore with Kirara not inducing crowd-control, I still like the feel of it.

Executor Specialists -> Fast-Redeploy Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: There's an operator called Executor (technically two) and Hellagur's sword is called that as well. We don't need more clouding the term. Why I use their other name: I've always liked their fanon name since it describes them so well.

Trapmaster Specialists -> Ambusher Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: I have a vehement hatred for the word 'trap'. Why I use their other name: Now, bear with me. I tried my best to find a word to describe this archetype with a name that didn't involve the word 'trap', but simply couldn't find a good one. Even if I substituted it with the word 'mine'. I chose the image of someone sitting at a ranged position putting down mines left and right while attacking them from afar. Because enemies will gladly walk over those mines evne though they're clearly there, it's sneaky in a way.

Dollkeeper Specialists -> Substitute Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: I was too used to their other name. Why I use their other name: I think I am one of the first people to coin the term in the first place. It sounds nice, it is taken from their description, and it describes them well. Not all of the substitutes are dolls after all.

Geek Specialists -> Stranger Specialists Why I do not use their canon name: While it's undescriptive I knew that it wasn't the only way to translate that CN term. Why I use their other name: It's essentially a slightly different translation of the same term. I made the image of that the way they work is 'strange' and 'unfamiliar' to most others.

[nightowlfandom]

Villain! BNHA AU- Our Little Apprentice: Episode-Bakugou

CHECK OUT MY MASTERLIST HERE!!

X RATED PROMPT LIST| NON X RATED PROMPT LIST

Okay you guys know the rules, I’m a grown ass bitch, you are reading about grown ass people.

Episode-PROLOGUE| Episode-Deku

Leggo!

Now playing- Episode Bakugou!

...

O.R.C.H.I.D- Kink Unlocked : Public Acts

“ORCHID don’t start.” you groaned as you typed in some coordinates.

“I have to! Y/N have you lost your mind?!”

You didn't think arguing with your AI companion was a great way to start the day, yet here you were.

A hologram of a girl in a school uniform with a giant hairbow secures atop shiny silver pigtails appeared on your screen.

"Y/N-"

“Save it, okay?!” you leaned back in your seat. “It’s for Izu-kun.”

“A WHOLE ASS VILLAIN.” ORCHID emphasized. “Y/N-”

“Shut it!” you snapped. “Get me coordinates for the fight that happened the other day.”

“Fetching coordinates....Y/N, I just don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Nothing will as long as....as long as Izuku isn’t planning to trick me.”

“I’ve erased all your records of living here so no one will tie your landlord’s disappearance to you.”

“Cool. We gotta go mobile until we can set you up somewhere.”

You watched as each computer began folding on itself into a little compact laptop shaped apparatus. You grabbed the new travel sized AI and shoved it into a backpack.

“I’ve connected myself to your wristwatch.”

Before you could turn around, Izuku walked around the corner. He stretched his arms above his head. He had stayed over after the night you two had. You had snuck out of bed to pack up everything as he instructed.

“Hey Y/N...ready already?” he yawned. He was very disheveled, hair all over the place.

“I don’t own much.” you replied shortly. “All I have that is super important are my suits and O.R.C.H.I.D.”

“Right.” he gave a single nod. “The guys are expecting you already so we can go whenever you want.”

“Right.” you repeated his words. “We could-...There’s no need to stay here y’know...”

“Of course. Don’t worry, the warehouse will feel just like home.”

“I’ll bet.”

...

You stood outside a weird looking building. You shifted all your weight to one side with a hand on your hip. Izuku pressed a random button on an intercom. “Hey fuck face, let me in!” He had slipped his hand into yours, causing you to feel warm inside. It felt almost nice.

“Everyone’s waiting.” he spoke as you both walked down the hall. “I warn you now, some might be more on board than others.”

“You can say it, Bakugou.” you scoffed. “Who cares what he thinks?” you grumbled. “I did not care about his opinions then, you think I care now?”

“Great! You’ll fit right in here.” he chuckled. “HEY, Y/N’S HERE!” he yelled once he got to a place that looked like a boardroom. It looked very...not like the outside. It was kind of professional looking.

Every chair in the room spun around and you were met by an unsettling amount of familiar faces. Instead of innocent, bright eyes boys they were all scary looking and rugged men. They had all changed intensely.

“Old classmate.” Tenya Iida lowered his glasses. He was sitting in the chair closest to you. “Glad you could join us.”

“How nice to see you after your little show.” followed Denki.

“Glad you see it our way!” Kirishima laughed.

“Good to have you...baby~” Shoto, who had been facing an open window turned to you with a wink.

“Fuck you.” you snarled, those old feelings rising up.

“Still haven’t forgiven me?” he smirked.

“Izuku I swear to-” you almost raised your fist, but luckily O.R.C.H.I.D cut through the air with her voice.

“Not to interrupt but can we set me up now?”

“Where can I set up my AI?” you turned to Izuku with a sigh, deciding that making anyone mad wasn’t on the menu.

“What’s so great about a stupid computer!” a new voice huffed. Katsuki pushed passed you two, rubbing the back of his head. He has obviously just woken up.

“Okay first of all it’s not a stupid computer. It’s too advanced for people like you guys.” you placed the flat disk on the table.

“Speak your password?”

“Princess.” you spoke loud and clearly.

“Princess? Vain are we?” Shoto turned towards you with an amused grin

“Within my own right.” you huffed.

Everyone watched as it turned into a huge quite literal ‘super’ computer. O.R.C.H.I.D’S avatar appeared on screen. “Welcome back!”

“Alright O.R.C.H.I.D.” You grabbed the handheld keyboard. “Where are the nanobots?” you hummed.

“I built them in my mainframe.”

“Show me...outside.” you ignored the slightly surprised glances your received as every monitor displayed a different part of the parking lot.

“This will be perfect for the heist tonight...”Kirishima commented. “This thing will have us in and out in no time.”

“-and since Bakugou was so welcoming towards Y/N, she’ll be your partner for the night.”Izuku cut in. “He’ll be the one to walk you through your initiation.”

“WHAT?”

“Deal with it.” Izuku scoffed. “Maybe she can keep your dumb ass under control so you don’t expose us like last time.”

“I ALWAYS WORK ALONE.”

“Not anymore!”

You watched as Bakugou sent a glare your way.

“Cool?” you raised an eyebrow.

... (fast forward)

“O.R.C.H.I.D, Scan the area.” you whispered into your watch. “There’s five guards, they’re understaffed today?”

“How do you know all that?” Bakugou boredly leaned against an alley wall..

“Look.” you held out your phone to him. He stared at you like you had 8 heads for a minute before he grabbed the phone from you. “Shit...maybe you aren’t so useless.”

“I never was.” you sighed. “O.R.C.H.I.D, preform action takedown.”

“As you wish.”

Every single guard collapsed in place. “Tell the others to go, they have 20 minutes before the effects wear off.”

“Heard you loud and clear babe.” Izuku’s voice could be heard in your earpiece.  “You’re good at this, you’ll be a natural in no time!”

“God why did they stick me in a skirt. These things suck.” you whined. You noticed Bakugou was staring at you for a long time, as if trying to see something you couldn’t.

“You really are different than how you used to be.” Katsuki grumbled.

“Glad you noticed. Puberty does that.” you rolled your eyes.

“Not what I meant!” he barked in reply. “Damnit you act like you’re above everyone!”

“Does that sound familiar?” you glared at him with a vengeance. “I seem to remember you had quite the superiority complex towards me...the extra.” you seethed the word he used to call you and everyone else below him. He had gone completely quiet now.

(Flashback)...

You looked at your camera lens, giving the thumbs up to Momo who stood up straight.

“Did you get my good side?”

“You look great!” you gave her a finger gun. It was graduation day and you were busy getting pictures of everyone to post on your famous Heroes Of The Future blog. 10 million viewers a week. As you pretended to shoot your little finger gun, you noticed a little pastel pink colored fizz come out of your finger.

“What the-”

“Hey, L/N!” a voice howled with laughter. Katsuki strode past the crowd of people. “Just wanted to let you know to stay out my way while your busy taking pictures from the sidelines. I’d hate to see the least useless person in the school get pancaked.”

“The only reason I’m not gonna punch your lights out is because for some reason Izuku considers you a friend. So get out of my way.” you glowered. As you walked away, Bakugou stared at your back.

He went to follow you, to tell you what he had been really meaning to say...that he was sorry you ended up with an asshole like Todoroki...or somethin’

but you had already joined your other friends.

...(Flashback end)

“I’m not the same stupid kid you know.” he grumbled. “People chance.”

“Neither am I...”were the last words you spoke before you tapped away at your screen. Izuku had promised you that your first heist wouldn’t involve any super harsh villain work, at least until you got out of your hero mindset.

“Someone’s coming your way. You gotta distract them, Y/N.” you heard in your earpiece

“Or kill them...your choice.” Came Denki’s voice. “I’d kill them but, your choice, babysteps, cutie!.”

Like they said, a guard came running around the corner charging for you and Bakugou. Before Katsuki could do anything, you grabbed the attackers arm and gave them a face full of radioactive plasma to the face. “O.R.C.H.I.D, Shockwave!”

“As you wish!”

The attacker was practically turned into dust. Was killing a bad person like reverse psychology? Probably. A bad person killing a bad person? Could you even call yourself a bad person. You had never used your quirk for anything other than saving stray kittens from trees.

This was years different.

“Someone else is coming! Be prepared.”

You looked to Bakugou seeing if he had any bright ideas. Before you knew it, he had grabbed your waist and pushed you against the wall, covering your body with his. “What are you-”

You were thinking more along the lines of. He used his quirk next...but this worked too.

Bakugou crashed his mouth over yours, claiming your mouth in a very lewd looking and sounding kiss. He had a fistful of your hair in one hand while the other arm wrapped around your waist, holding you up. He grinded his body against yours.

The more he went on, the more compromising it looked. Whoever had walked around the corner saw. They saw everything. They saw Bakugou anchor his head to kiss a harsh line down your neck and jaw. They saw his hands trail up under your clothes. They even saw his hands creep under your skirt.

“Do you mind?” Bakugou’s glare scared the stranger cold. “I don’t like an audience.” he snarled, holding out a hand. “BEAT IT!” he barked.

Whoever had bolted off and left you both alone, but that didn’t stop Katsuki from slowly pulling down your panties. “The nerve of some people.” he shook his head.

“Bakuou what are you-”

“Shut it! the quieter you are, the more fun we can have.” he smirked. “I’ve always liked you Y/N.” he chuckled. “I ain’t passing this up. You aren’t either.” he hooked one of your legs around his shoulders as he drove his tongue up your slit.

You first instinct was to very abruptly slap a hand over your mouth. You were shaking instantly. He laughed harshly as he lashed his tongue against your clit.

“You and everyone else.” you groaned, feeling your legs shake. It was like you were in a fan fiction or something. “W-we can’t do this here-Ungh..” you couldn’t finish your sentence.

“Oh yes we can, we can do this right here and no one is gonna say shit about it unless they wanna be in a fucking wheelchair, drinking out of a straw for the rest of their lives.” he growled. “You’re rocking your hips against my tongue like a little slut. You want this just as much as I do!” he cooed between harsh licks. “You’re a little whore for me aren’t you? Is daddy gonna teach you to be a good villain? hm?” he thrust a finger into your wetness, making you let out a cry.

He held your hips down, making it hard to move beneath his devilish mouth. He was being mean on purpose. He laid lewd, wet, and loud open mouthed kisses along your sex.

“K-katsuki.” you whimpered. “This feels dirty.”

“Awww...it’s supposed to.” he mocked your bashfulness. He fumbled with his belt as he rose to his feet. His pants dropped to his knees, then pooled on the ground. “I’m gonna fuck you like this, just like this.” he hoisted you up and pushed you further against the wall, inching himself inside of you.

“K-katsuki!~” you whined. “It’s s-so...”

“So big? So thick? Hell the fuck yeah it is.” he laughed. “You like being man-handled by me don’t you.” he slowly thrust himself into you. “Like a little slut. Face it, you want to be my extra. You love being below me because your a little fucking whore.” he snarled as his thrusts grew more and more strong. “You can’t even stay quiet on a fucking mission because you want some cock so fucking bad.” he insulted you.

Your legs couldn’t move, shit you had been shaking so much you didn’t even realize that two more people had walked by and very quickly fled after a threat from the man using you as a sex doll.

You were first to cum. You practically exploded, feeling every emotion you had release all over his length. Bakugou came shortly after, filling up your tight hole to the brim. To the point where it spilled on the ground.

“Good girl.” he threw his head back. “V-very good girl. Shit...” he messily crashed his mouth over yours against, practically invading your mouth with his tongue to which you shyly responded with affections of your own. “Maybe this was a good idea after all.”

It was all good until you realized....your earpiece was still on...and that everyone could heard you.

O.R.C.H.I.D: Next Episode Unlocked!-  Todoroki (Read Now!)

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

The Adventurous Eaters Club

Hi buddies!  Welcome to the first post of yet another project I have chosen to take on because I apparently don’t enjoy sleep in any form. 

To make this even more FUN, let’s do a THING (just in time for #RACultivatingKindness and the Random Acts Food Equity initiative)

One hundred percent of author proceeds from Misha’s cookbook go to charity, including the following: The Edible Schoolyard The Garden School Foundation Whatcom Farm-to-School Fund

One week after each blogpost I do for this little adventure, I will count up the notes on that post and donate $1 per note to one of the above, or to @randomactsorg​.  

If you make a donation to any of these (in any amount!) or buy Misha’s cookbook and send me the receipt in my asks I will match your donation AND you can pick the next thing I cook!

[I say this like I have clout here, but hey why not feed some people, do a little good, and make this interactive!]

With all the preliminaries aside, let’s cook some chicken, under the cut! 

(warning: the photos below the cut contain pictures of raw chicken in case that is a “ew” trigger for anyone.  just warning ya)

Mix ‘N’ Match “Fried” Chicken (page 169)

This is a baked fried chicken tender recipe with three different spice mixtures (for those with children, the intent is to introduce them to diff flavors and also make them less fearful of food with ‘specks’ (or speckles, as L calls them)).

**The first thing I said reading this was “Dammit Misha!  Am I just casually supposed to own a meat mallet?” (does everyone? have I missed out on the meat mallet trend? fallen behind the curve of cool culinary utensil ownership? *hangs head in shame*)

First things first, I’m going to go rogue and tell you that after you cut your chicken breast into tenderloins (or open the package of pre-cut ones), you should salt your meat for at least an hour before cooking it. 

Like so:

pre-salting meat allows it to be seasoned from the inside as well as the outside (the salt will absorb), and also helps lower the risk of overcooking.  I promise it makes a HUGE difference.

While the chicken is salting, set up your dredging station.

This is the point in the process where I realized I am out of eggs.  However, I did have the following substitutes: 1. mayo and 2. half and half.  So what did I do? I mixed them (Misha I’m SORRY).

I am also sorry to you who is reading this post for having to look at photos of mayonnaise and half and half on this fine day.  

But! this does work in a pinch.  You basically need something runny enough to dip but thick enough to stick to the meat.

Also, here is another place Mish and I diverge - he kept the “wet” pan as a single one on the station, but I know how messy I am (in both cooking and life), and due to there being three separate spices in the recipe I divided it into three, so as not to mix it.

[somewhere Jake Abel has been summoned to make a few, um, jokes about this...composition]

Next, the “dry” station - i.e. your flour/spices.  The book uses pie pans for all of this, I - a prepared individual who did not assess not having ANY uniform cookware before starting this cooking blog journey - only had one pie pan, so these are what I used:

team free will 3.0

here they are with spices for each separate one.  do not fear the cinnamon.  I too, was once afraid.  trust me when I say you will no longer be shackled by your doubt once you have tried this.

also, I went rogue again on the last spice mixture which should just be paprika but I did not have paprika (OP check your pantry before you do the next installment of this challenge), so that is the combination I recklessly replaced with it (and I recommend it!!!).

spices plus flour plus salt (for the love of Jack always add salt at each step, I cannot re-emphasize enough that this is so very important, like Sam and Dean hotel room warding important).

Mix ‘em up.

sigh I can already tell my colors will not be as vibrant as the book’s (I know you, you’re thinking ‘OP you just mixed mayo and half and half, and THIS is the crime you are sad about?? but. here we are).  

Next, Misha says to wrap your chicken in plastic wrap.

no, I don’t know why mine is green.  let’s pretend its for Soldier Boy.

time to use the meat mallet which I do not have.  however, in a pinch - a cast iron skillet will do.  (the book also very much advocates for owning one of these and I too am a Cast Iron Truther.  the only pan(s) I use).

meat mallet cosplay.

now,“smash that meat until it’s 3/4 of an inch thick.” 

this takes approximately 30 seconds to a minute with the cast iron (longer if you have pent up aggression).  it’s not a REQUIRED step, but nice for an even cook.

take your flat chicken and start dredgin’ - flour first, just a thin coat

on each side

now take it for a trip to the half and half mayo hot girl summer pool party (or, if you are a real adult unlike yours truly, the eggs you have and previously whisked together for your “wet” pan)

[stop that thought this is a blog for a children’s cookbook]

let the excess run off before sticking this back in the dry mixture for a second coat, then put it on your pre-greased pan.

like so.

what my kitchen looked like at 1:00 a.m.

final touch = the moment I knew Misha, Vicki, and I were kindred spirits as I too like to drizzle melted butter over everything and anything.  

drizzle this liquid gold on top of each piece and

pop those babies in the oven at 350 for 20-30 minutes while you write bad fan fiction sentences (well, what I did then anyway)

then slice ‘em up and put them on this plate.

Yes I added popcorn for garnish as a treat.

My colors as predicted are not as good as the professional food photographer’s Misha’s:

But the flavors were definitely there!! Especially the cinnamon.  Would 10/10 recommend.

Happy cooking!  Asks are open if you have questions or want to yell at me about the mayo thing.  SORRY AGAIN OK

[s1utspeare]

Writing Tag Game

Once again, @hils79 is coming through and giving me reasons to live every day. I love u hilsy :')

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

18 lol

2. What is your total AO3 word count?

209,037

3. Top five fics by kudos

A Swiftly Tilting Planet - 228

i wish that you would love me - 133

cause it's easier to bury my head in the sand sometimes - 131

the play's the thing - 114

falling backwards, falling backwards - 103

4. Do you respond to comments, and why?

I like to!! Partially because I love talking about my work with people, and I love seeing what they've gotten out of it, and partially because i'm always so excited when people comment so it's like "!!!!!!!!"

5. What’s the fic you have written with the angstiest ending?

uhhhhh wow idk. ummmm the first fic i ever published, way back in like, 2012, was a Major Character Death ending... Precursor in the Trollhunters fandom is fairly bittersweet... idk most people like angst with a happy ending (including me) so I try not to end things on a down note. There's enough of that in the world. for recent fics, I guess falling backwards, falling backwards OH WAIT SHIT i completely forgot about can't be bothered by the teachers. nevermind, THAT one is the angstiest

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

the play's the thing! that one was just very cute and very fluffy so of course it had a happy ending ^.^

7. Do you write crossovers, if so what’s the craziest one you have done?

I've only ever done crossovers as crack fic, but i was.............. uh definitely very weird in middle school so there's some out there.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really lol. There were a couple of critiques on some things back on ff.net, but they weren't even really hate, just things that I was like >:/ about bc i was like. twelve.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I didn't, and I never thought I would, but then I started writing smut for like, my professional job, and idk I just think it's really interesting??? it's something i haven't ever really tried so when I'm looking for a way to stretch my writing muscles and experiment I do some smut lol. I'm actually really proud of my chen pi/er-ye/yatou smut and i'm not entirely sure why??? probably just bc I wrote it which means i'm growing as a writer asighafjalfjg. who would've thought.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope! I'm not sure if that's bc I've never been in a big-enough fandom, or if everyone I've ever come across is just really nice! My style is also pretty distinctive, so that could be a turn away from stealing lol

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so! That would be so cool though!

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Back on ffnet, yeah. They were all very 2012. And bad.

13. All time favorite ship!

I DON'T KNOOOOWWWWWW like my favorite ship (Wangxian) i haven't written yet, but my favorite ship to write has probably been Iron Threesome (have i even actually written them???? outside of pingpangsangxie?? i can't remember. Anyway).

14.What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you will?

I have no idea? Like, I have every intention of finishing every WIP I have started rn... if it's not something I'm completely into, I just don't start it lmao. I want them all to be DONE but i don't have TIME lol. Uhhhh there's a dmbj kpop au that i have outlined but probably won't ever write bc there's a lot more plot than I think I have the patience to put into a piece that's essentially just "zhang rishan angst modern au"

15. What are your writing strengths?

Uhhhhhhhhh language use, probably. @xcziel said something recently about how my writing reads like it's lined in gold (and I nearly cried about it), and I definitely write as though things are going to be read aloud, so I like to pay attention to how rhythm and sounds and sentences flow. Also DIALOGGGUUUEEE see this is all because i'm a playwright alsidghasdfkjas

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

i go too fast :/ i feel like if i took some more time on things i could really up the quality of some of it but i get too excited and just want to get it OUT so i end up making tiny mistakes and then have to do more work correcting them, but if i had just been slightly more patient I could have avoided it in the first place lol

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I think that you should stick to languages you're fluent in, unless you have a professional translator. I also don't believe in making words in other (real) languages italicized, because that sort of emphasizes the "otherness" of a different language, and that's not a good thing. THAT BEING SAID i fucking love making up languages; I don't have any fully developed ones, but all of my fantasy worlds usually have made-up swear words lmao

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Percy Jackson adsighasdljalsdfjad. That was a while ago.

19. Fave fic you have written?

OOOoohhhhh, shit. Uh. I don't know if I have favorites, I just have things that I'm proud of for like, each fic? Like I really like At the Beginning of the End of the World because that one was written in second person, which was a fun challenge, as well as for a fandom that I'm not in (Deltarune) because it was a charity commission request, so I had to do a lot of research and stuff to figure out what was going on there. A Swiftly Tilting Planet is super fun and super interesting to me, and I'm really excited for the rest of the trilogy that I have planned, but there's also a LOT of stuff I kind of wish I could change about that one (mainly because I've read it over like 78 times and found all the small mistakes lmao). I'm also super proud of i wish that you would love me because i think I really doubled-down on the language strengths in that one, and the amount of people that fic resonated with is very important to me, because I'm one of them. So there's a lot of different things that I like about each fic I've written, and I like them all!

THIS WAS SO FUN THANK YOU HILSY i'm gonna tag @daydreamorama, @mejomonster, @jockvillagersonly, @bookjoyworm, and @pissmeoffanddie, as well as anyone who would like to TAG STEAL >:)

[lilyrachelcassidy]

same anon again! and totally cool with the last request :) So I popped up with a new one. Same thing daphne x reader using 15 and/or 47 from the prompt list! (preferably daphne asking out reader but anything’s cool) :))

A/N: Hi lovely anon... You're the sweetest <3 I really think you might be my official fav person rn :D And yes, yes, I'm super happy to see you again in my inbox and... oh boy, I love Daphne x Reader so much. Here you go with with the requests you asked for :)

Warnings: Might add but I consider both of those works as children-friendly lol (maybe some alcohol but that's pretty much it)...

15: “Just tell her that.” / “Such a pep talk…”

"Pansy?"

You burst into the Slytherin common room with as much energy as your legs could carry you with at the late hour as it was. Exactly, 1 am, if to be radically precise. But getting acquainted with Pansy's strange late-night habits for over seven years, you knew you could find her sprawling over the large lounge, still awake, with the Firewhisky drink in her hand per usual.

As presumed, you were right -- she was sitting, still fully dressed in her school robes and staring aloof at the fireplace, drifting more in her perplexing thoughts than she would want to. Hearing your sleepy voice, however, made her tilt her head and glance at you, standing in your emerald-green pajamas, at the entrance of the stairs to the girls' room.

She smirked. "Insomnia playing over?" she asked, teasingly, her sparkling eyes locking with your fluttery ones.

"No," you answered carefully before covering your mouth from a yawn to which Pansy's smirk widened. You flopped tiredly on the sofa, next to her and laid your head instinctively on her shoulder. "There's something I wanted to talk with you about."

"That's why you got out of bed? To talk to me about something you could do as well in the morning but without bothering your pretty face?" she asked, and though you couldn't see her face, you imagined she was frowning in incomprehension.

"Well..." you drawled, already partly regretting you had decided to come over with such a sensitive issue to her. "It's the only time Daphne is not around."

"Oh...Is that--" Pansy gasped in enthusiasm, throwing your head off of her to which you reacted with a small moan of pain, to look directly into your face. "Are you going to finally admit you're so madly in love with her and that you drool at her every time she doesn't look?"

Well, that was straightforward...

"W-what?" you sputtered out, trying to make sense of what you wanted to express. But dealing suddenly with too much confusion and surprise, you found it to be a challenging task to perform. "How would you know? I've never told anyone!"

At the raised, almost frantic tone of your voice, Pansy grinned, probably satisfied with the fact she dared to shock you. "You are the worst player in this puppy-love game if you haven't noticed yet," she said, arching her eyebrows. "It's almost hard to miss you staring at her in the classrooms or... I don't know... even when you talk to her, smiling like mad. Only concerns are for Daphne, who seems to be totally oblivious to that."

"You think? I mean, hasn't she noticed? Did she s--"

"No," Pansy interrupted you intentionally, rolling her eyes. "I think she has other doubts than that. Besides... it's also she who attempts to hide her goo-goo eyes from you."

You frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Ughh... She has a crush on you too! Happy?"

"No, she does no--"

"Of course she does, you unheeding dolt! One time, I even caught her scribbling your name in her notebook with small hearts around. What do you think it means?"

"I--" Momentarily speechless, you dropped your gaze to the hands and unconsciously started playing with your fingers. "I don't know what to say..."

"Just tell her that." Pansy shrugged, finding the simplest solution in everything while eloquently sipping her drink. "It's a normal thing to do. Go over to her during lunchtime and talk to her. Confess."

You huffed, suddenly feeling a stream of sarcasm dancing on your tongue. "Oh, really? Such a pep talk, you know... Thanks, Pans."

She nudged you with her elbow. "C'mon. You've wasted plenty of time daydreaming about her. It's a moment to take up action. Tomorrow, it's your round, or otherwise, it might pass."

Sighing, you peeked at her with seriousness. "I don't know about that."

"Then you'll never know," she commented aptly, and you knew she made her point. "I realize it might be confusing. But hey, no matter what happens, I'll be always there for you. Remember?"

"Remember," you repeated, somehow feeling more confident than you had been ten minutes ago.

XOXOXO

47. “Are you asking if I’m a single?” / “Okay… I-I will.”

The party night was... disastrous, to say at least.

And you really didn't want to be here. But all thanks to your best friend, Susan, who was definitely a go-go type of a person and had been insistently persuading you to get out with her ("This'd be so fun, Y/N!" said she with already a little too drunk tone), by now you were being pushed in the crowd of inebriated people, soaking in sweat due to the heated breaths that were puffing and blowing at your neck from all around. Making your best attempts to push your way, conflict-less, to some less teeming space, you met with a failure by being shoved to your previous position by someone's hips from behind and a loud 'Watch it!'.

Frustration and exasperation accumulated in you, and you felt truly flustered with a situation. As it turned out, flustered enough to provoke the combative self you hadn't known existed in you, to start jostling everyone around to move away from your path to freedom. It required a few angry 'ouches' and curses sent towards you, but finally...Finally, you succeeded in getting away from the bustle and a disgusting odor of sweat that hurt your nostrils just too much.

"Double Scotch, please," you said breathlessly to the bartender as you had reached the bar and casually leaned over the counter. "Triple if needed. Make it extra strong."

The bartender nodded merely, giving you a perfunctory smile, before taking care of your order by grasping some liquor from the shelf and pouring it professionally into the glass. Too distracted with exhaustion from too loud music and screeches from the crowd singing along the songs' lyrics, you hadn't even noticed a blonde girl with a glint of explicit interest in her eyes staring at you. Well, not until...

"Is it a way of dealing with the party?" the girl asked, smiling. "Or are you trying to forget you're here?"

"Both, I guess." You laughed, turning your head to behold a nice-looking gal who was casually sipping her Mohito drink. A really nice-looking, actually. Her hair was laid in the smooth curls on her broad shoulder, emphasizing her soft facial features and shiny, blue eyes. Dressed in the tight gleaming-black dress with the heals lengthening her legs, she looked more than appealing. "I was forced by a friend to come. Not my intention."

"Tell me about it," muttering under her breath, she playfully rolled her eyes and smirked suggestively. Then with an outstretched hand, she proffered you an inviting smile and introduced herself, "I'm Daphne."

You took a hand invitation, shaking in lightly and reciprocating a smile. "Y/N."

"So, you came here with a friend?" the girl, now as you knew Daphne, asked you with an arousing curiosity. "Or girlfriend, or boyfriend?"

Alcohol being the best solution for straightforwardness as it was, forced you to express your first-moment thought without any earlier contemplation. "Are you asking if I'm single?" You took a gulp of your drink and squinted suddenly at the realization of your words. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that! It's just--"

"It's okay, I'm aware of the after-alcohol effects," Daphne soothed you down and tried her best to hide her pre-momentary shock from her face, though you could still detect it.

You fucking idiot!

"Yeah, I've come here with my roommate. She loves parties and said it would be a crime to miss one, especially on Friday night," you answered her question, attempting to get slickly out of your faux pas.

Smiling, forgetting about your little confusion, and ignoring the noise from the background, you chatted, relishing each other's company and treating it as a make-up for ruined Friday plans, fault laying on both of your friends' sides. How much time had passed while you were sitting there, taking the next rounds from the bartender and goggling at each other you didn't know, but one thing was sure -- you both definitely enjoyed it.

The things came, however, to the end as soon as Susan, plastered as you had never seen her before, approached you in a stumbling manner. She was giggling like mad, which clearly indicated one thing -- it's about time to export her back to the house.

"What the heck?! It's not a funeral, peach. Come dance with me!" she screamed as if she was on the opposite side of the room, putting her arms around your shoulder and dangling on you to keep her balance. "Cooooommmmee..."

"No," you shot back, also drunk but much less than her, which made you take responsibility in your hands. Instead of looking at Susan, however, you glanced at Daphne apologetically. "We're calling a cab."

"But, I--"

"Shut it," you said, a little angry with her intoxicated state but yourself having a bit of a problem creating a coherent sentence. "The party is over. We're- are go-ing home."

Susan made a small groan but said nothing, to which you were very thankful because you wanted to end the conversation with Daphne. The sudden influx of bravery had overtaken, and you asked her to hand over her phone. So she compliantly did, and you tapped your phone number on the screen, saving it on the contacts list before handing it back to the proper owner.

"I'm sorry it turned out that way. In these circumstances," you apologized to Daphne, the weight on your arm becoming gradually heavier as your friend wriggled in her place, still grasping your shoulder like to necessary sanity. "It was nice meeting you."

Daphne smiled at that. "You too. Good luck with..." She didn't finish her sentence, but you concluded she was referring to the little situation with drunken Susan.

"Thanks. Oh, and..." You suddenly changed the timbre of your voice to a little deeper one, almost exigent actually. "...don't forget to call me."

A coy smile spread on Daphne's lips, and she said, more in the murmur than a normal tone, "Okay...I-I will..."

And then, you were strolling away, satisfied with how your Friday turned out, much less lame than you had initially assumed.

Maybe the party wasn't such a bad idea after all.

XOXOXOXO

A/N: I enjoyed writing those actually. These had to be drabbles but somehow turned out to be full-length one-shots. But no fault of mine; these were just my hands doing most of the job! I'm taking a break to spend some quality time with my friends (yes, it's me bragging I have a private life lol), and I'm sitting at my computer to write the next goodie :) See ya in some time!

Btw, as I've counted (via my computer) it's almost 2k words. What's wrong?!

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hey sex witch, wondering if you have any advice on how to deal with feelings of shame about kinks you have? (especially ones considered to be on the weirder end of things)

hi anon,

that's a hard one, and I'm sorry you're struggling with it :(

whenever someone - myself included! - if feeling down and out about the sense that they're a bit of a sexual oddity, I find it helpful to remember that what's "normal" has fluctuated wildly throughout human history, and is never more than temporary at best.

I mean heck, in much of medieval Europe cishet men who never had sex with anyone but their cishet lawfully wedded wives in missionary position with the intent to reproduce could still be considered a bit deviant if they were suspected of enjoying sex too much! human beings are beautifully varied, but unfortunately one thing that many of us unfortunately have in common is that we love to judge other people and will find almost any excuse to do so.

even more unfortunately, that frequently even includes judging ourselves. hell, that can be the hardest kind of judgement to unlearn! I'll be the first to admit that while I spend all day every day encouraging people to radically accept their bodies exactly as they are and advocate for their health and desire without shame, I still frequently find myself looking at my own abysmal sex life and wondering what in the actual holy hell is wrong with me.

... the point being, making peace with who you are and what you want can be hard, but not impossible.

as with many other facets of the self, it can be easier to accept something about you by first accepting - and even loving it! - in other people. if you have any interest in exploring kinky social groups, either online or in person, I'd definitely recommend looking into it. I cannot emphasize enough that this doesn't even need to be a sex thing; I've been to kink meet-ups that were firmly pg and fully clothed that took place in a sports bar's back room over plates of chicken wings. tons of nice people, hanging out and catching up and occasionally veering very casually into conversations about their interests in being tied up/beaten/electrocuted/etc. even for someone who shouts about sex as much as me, it's refreshing to be in a space where people are so upfront and frank about the shit they're into!

it's also definitely worthwhile to spend some time doing some major unpacking within yourself. sorry if journaling isn't really your bag, but I would definitely recommend taking some time to ask yourself some serious questions and answer them in as much or as little detail as you need. things to think about could include when you first started becoming aware of your kink(s), when the feelings of shame arrived, what you believe might have spurred those, and how you can untangle or outright refute those sources of shame. were you taught to fear your sexuality? well that's not going to work, it's a part of you as much as your sense of taste and your skin and your ability to dream. have you run into the notion that there's something particularly immoral about your particular kink? look, dude: as long as everyone's given informed consent, you can do whatever the fuck you want when you fuck. just because it's not many people's cup of tea doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the people who do enjoy it.

of course, tackling all that alone can be a tall order, especially if you're finding that the roots of this shame run deep. a little therapy never hurt anyone, and there are plenty of therapists out there who specialize in matters of sexuality and even kink. if you're in the US, like me, you can start looking for options through the directory at AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators Counselors and Therapists) and KAP (Kink Aware Professionals).

there's probably, you know, a lot of work and some tears that will have to go into this, because very few people can just magically will their shame away overnight, but I wish you the very best of luck in your journey and hope you'll remember that there's nothing wrong with being turned out, even if it is by something on the weirder end of things. I hope you can reach a place where your kink only makes you feel good (or bad, if that's what you're into, but bad in a more fun way).

[aza-marael]

Let’s Talk About Talking About Dumplin’

**Disclaimer: I give a lot of advice, but I am no professional. I’m speaking entirely from personal experiences. I encourage you to talk honestly with the people around you about Their opinions rather than listening to just yours and mine.**

So, Dumplin:

This is high key several years past it coming out but the Internet sends me into strange places so here we are.

This is both kind of a critique of the movie but mainly a critique of some things I’ve seen on Google reviews that I want to address. The movie has its problems and its strengths, and if you didn’t like it, that’s fine. Personally, I love reading well informed reviews, even if that person is totally disparaging a movie, because I’m the type to love super shitty B movies.

Anyways, reviews. My biggest issue comes from this debate between different reviews about how being overweight is portrayed. Some like it, some don’t. I’m not going to get into too much semantics because it is very opinionated. But some people in particular were talking about how the movie is an inaccurate and even “toxic” portrayal of obesity, that the mom leaving the salads in the fridge is “nice,” and in one particular review, people who are overweight have problems with a “lack of physical motivation and are usually addicted to food.” 

As someone who has been overweight most of their lives (not obese, because there is a difference, but definitely 50+ pounds over), these reviews really rankle me because it comes across as someone who has never been overweight, who has never had depression that has either influenced/been influenced by their weight, who has never had zero self esteem related to their appearance because of messages sent to them by the people closest to them. Maybe they have had these experiences, I don’t know them, but saying that “fat people” are “addicted to food” is incredibly inaccurate and promotes a very harmful stereotype about weight gain.

In my own experience, I started gaining weight largely after a close death as a kid and not really getting the emotional support from my parents. I’m also naturally sedentary, so that coupled with grief and later with depression (which fed into some bad eating habits, yes) caused me to gain a lot of weight. And yes, at the worst of it, I was kind of a shitty person. I relate a lot to Willowdean’s portrayal of admittedly kind of a terrible person because I was also like that; I couldn’t possibly believe that someone could love me. 

Will’s mom leaving the salads in the fridge can be seen as nice to a lot of people, but for me, it left a terrible taste in my mouth, because I have been there, staring at that salad. My entire life I have been in and out of gyms, personal trainers, sports, etc. because my mother placed me there. My weight was a consistent topic, about how she wants me to be healthier, about my eating habits, about it helping my life. Yes, she had good intentions, and yes, I understand very much where she’s coming from. (I can practically talk shop with any gym nut about working out and nutrition.) And to clarify, no, my mother is not abusive in any way. But even if she had the best of intentions, for me it only came across as “I’m only as good as my weight.” “You won’t love me for who I am unless I’m skinny.” “My weight makes me ugly and everyone else knows it.” She never once said any of these things. She’s even emphasized “I love you regardless,” but when you hear from others, especially parents, every single day that you should lose weight and you need to lose weight--even more so when the word beauty is attached, even if it only happens a few times--those are the things you end up hearing. The negative always stands out more than the good. And regardless of her intentions, Rosie Dickson’s actions only served to further undermine her daughter’s self esteem, which then backfires on the goal of “losing weight.”

Recently, I learned from a friend that’s been doing research on nutrition science that I’ve been undereating. Severely. Since at least middle school, on a regular basis I had generally been eating less than 1200 calories a day. During middle school, definitely less than 1000 (I know because I’d been logging my food in a nutrition app at the time). That was probably around my heaviest and unhappiest times as well. As it is, I still undereat, because my body has gotten used to it. I wouldn’t consider myself anorexic--I’m overweight so no one ever even thought that I might be unintentionally starving myself. And I say “unintentionally” because most of the time, I really wasn’t actively thinking that I shouldn’t eat because I’m fat (though I’ve definitely had those moments), but rather it was this feeling of intense discomfort for people seeing me eat. Even now, if I’m too stressed out or frustrated, I skip meals. If people I don’t know and/or family are around at a party, I tend to eat very little, if at all, compared to just eating on my own. It is the perception of being seen as a “pig,” of being that “fat person addicted to food” that does it, and it is something I now have to try to unlearn. 

You are not helping someone who is overweight by “encouraging them to exercise and diet” the way you think you are. More than likely, they’re hearing it all the time anyway. And at least for me, constantly being told that I need to lose weight only puts me in a bad mood, in which I then *don’t* exercise and typically end up skipping meals. 

Healthy eating is another thing I’ve had to learn the hard way. Everyone associates undereating with people who are underweight. And yes, this happens, and yes, anorexia nervosa is a serious issue that should be treated and approached as such, but we also tend to forget about the other side of that. When you put your body into “starvation mode” and under eat (especially if you exercise as well), your body burns muscle tissue instead of fat tissue. It slows your metabolism to try to maintain your body weight (a survival mechanism for cases of true starvation situations), when in losing weight you want to increase your metabolism. If you bounce between regular/overeating and undereating, you will likely gain weight (your body will naturally overeat to compensate for the days of undereating). Furthermore, undereating, extreme calorie restriction, and other “starvation mode” things can cause lethargy, exhaustion, and--you probably guessed it--depression. It’s a vicious catch-22 for those like me whose weight gain is inextricably tied to depression.

I can say that, of all the diets and workout programs I’ve done, the only ones that have ever worked (and by “worked,” I mean I lost at least 10 pounds) are the ones that I became motivated to do myself. Those are also the only programs that have inflicted a lifestyle change on me, in part because I felt motivated enough to lose weight not to be “pretty,” but because I want to be healthier for *myself*. It really was less of a diet or exercise change (because I really haven’t changed my routine much) than it was a mood change. By numbers, I haven’t really lost much weight, but I feel better. Happier, more motivated not just to move, but to do the things I love to do. Change of diet, even increased water intake, has just naturally followed. Again, my diet really hasn’t changed much; I’ve just naturally begun to prefer fresh foods over fried, started eating salads of my own accord (I used to hate salads, too, so lo and behold), and even began learning how to cook.

And the kicker is? All those changes only started happening because my mother STOPPED talking about my weight all the time. It’s not totally out of the realm of conversation, but she doesn’t tell me to go exercise or to stop eating bread or to lose weight. When it comes up, it’s because she’s telling me “I look good” or to talk to me about healthy recipes. 

So rant aside, Willowdean’s mom leaving salads in the fridge and telling her daughter to eat better or exercise isn’t “nice.” It can actually be incredibly harmful, and I think has played a large part into Will’s evident low self-esteem and general bad attitude during a lot of the first parts of the film.

In Rosie’s defense though, I do think a lot of her telling Will these things has a lot to do with Rosie’s own internal voice about herself--likely propagated by toxic beauty pageant culture. I say this because I definitely did these things when I was younger; I would preach and nag to people about losing weight--which later extended to not doing things bad for you. (To which I will say I lost a friend this way; turns out telling people to do things has the opposite effect. Especially if you’re *constantly* telling them. Who knew?)

If you really are concerned about your friend/child/sibling/loved one being overweight, and I speak specifically for *health reasons* like being more at risk for things like cancer and heart attacks, first of all, don’t go around telling them “go lose weight” or “go exercise.” They won’t do it. What you can do, is stop telling them to do things, but notice when they do those things of their own accord. If they took a walk or went to the gym, say something positive. Compliment them. Positive reinforcement does so much for motivation. If you want them to eat healthier or start moving more, do it with them. Make it something you can do together, rather than something *they* have to do. It can become a new bonding activity, like the families you see walking their dogs together, or friends who go play tennis together. Make it less about a “have to do” and more about a “get to do.” Trying new things, experiencing the world. If you’re having fun, it’s a helluva lot easier to keep doing it and to actually see some kind of results. And perhaps most importantly, Be A Better Support System. Be there for them on both good and bad days, but especially the bad days. If they need space, let them have space (but recognize when that space becomes something unhealthy and isolating). Do the activities that they love with them. 

And Remind Them that you love them. Every Day. Tell them constantly. Tell them that you love them even when they’re being crabby. Tell them you love them when they can’t love themselves. If they can love themselves As They Are, and the rest will follow.

[samwrights]

Team Karasuno as dads [hc]

For a married woman that doesn’t want kids, I sure do fantasize about my boys being dads a lot.

Asahi;

He definitely cried when he found out you were pregnant.

When your daughter was born, he couldn’t even be in the room because he was so overwhelmed with you being in pain and the fact he was about to bE A DAD

He doesn’t even remember how you started dating because he was so blown away by your beauty or so he claims but the fact that y’all were married?? And having a kid?? When did he get so bold??

Eventually he got over it cause he felt bad that he wasn’t in the room holding your hand while you literally pushed a whole ass human out ya cooch.

He fainted

The first time he held his daughter was the first time he had felt complete, more complete than when he rejoined the volleyball team in his third year. It felt amazingly right. He tries to deny the fact and say your wedding was just as wholesome but you can tell. Fatherhood is something entirely different for him

“She takes after momma’s beauty.” A simp through and through.

Asahi is a parental HOG. Which is kinda nice cause he loves doting on your child but also HI I AM MOM AND WOULD LIKE TO HOLD MY BABY???

He tells YOU how to hold her and feed her and little ticks about her personality like you aren’t on maternity leave and are with the baby ALL DAY (although he is REALLY pushing for you to just be a stay-at-home mom)

Because he is soooo doting, it’s very rare that you wake in the middle of the night to feed or change her—Asahi is ALL over it. But he is human and there are days he’s too tired to wake up from dead sleep. It’s ok, he’s your human. Daddy deserves rest too.

Asahi would totally be a co-sleeper, or at least nap with the baby as much as he possibly could.

Definitely bought her multiple onesies that say “daddy’s little princess”.

She gonna be a spoiled brat when she’s older 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

Daichi Dadchi;

I mean he’s a literal running joke in the fandom

After being elected as the unofficial dad of the VBC in his high school days, it was no wonder that he was such a natural with your three munchkins.

Having three slightly older boys of varying ages, you relied heavily on Daichi to get through to them when you couldn’t.

He’s definitely the strict parent; your sons all try to take advantage of you 💀 demons

Your boys saw you as a pushover most of the time because you were just so tired.

“Just keep trying for a girl, they said. There’s a 50/50 chance, they said.” Was something Daichi would find you chanting to yourself often while you cooked dinner and the boys were playing soccer in the house and breaking something.

Even though Daichi is strict, he really tries to emphasize to the boys to treat you with kindness to make it a bit easier on you.

“Guys, please don’t make your mother rip her hair out.”

“We’re just playin’!” They would sing in flawed harmony

“One day, you guys are going to be all grown up with your own special person with your own kids, and you’re gonna love them so much that you’ll understand why I’m telling you to calm down and listen to your mom.” Asjdfkhlek.

“Ewwww, daddy loves mommy.”

“I sure do.”

Sugawara;

On god, Suga would be the most patient parent. He treats your toddlers like mini adults and not your insane nine year old girl or six year old boy.

He listens thoroughly when they are upset about something, cautiously listening to the deeper truths about why they’re upset and takes great care in making sure his children feel validated.

Super dad 🥰

But it’s not a random event; after being married to you for the last decade, he had so much practice with conflict resolution and genuinely listening to you that it was a natural tendency at this point.

For the most part, your children are incredibly well behaved. Sure, there’s an occasional incident because, well they’re kids. Your daughter, being the older of the two and nearly finished with primary school, was entering her phase of discovering boys and constantly writing in her diary.

Suga may be super dad, but he is not perfect, and for some reason I totally see him reading her diary.

“Koushi, put it back. Now.” He was just going to pretend that you using your mom voice on him didn’t turn him on and prepare him to fill you with another baby.

While he may be an expert on conflict resolution, you enforced respecting their privacy; quite a dynamic between the two of you in terms of validating your children as individuals.

“But honey, our daughter is starting to like boys.”

“At least one of the females in this house does.” 💀💀💀 with angels for children, someone had to be the clown of the Sugawara family and it was certainly you.

Tanaka;

You and Tanaka had your first baby in your guys’ third year of high school, which you would be lying if you said it wasn’t hell.

Tanaka fought tooth and nail to try to do everything from makin dinner, working, making sure you were getting rest, and of course still playing volleyball. Everything except actually trying to graduate.

“I don’t have time to study babe, I have practice and then we gotta put this squirt to bed.”

There was a constant argument about Tanaka continuing with volleyball that nearly forced you two to split. While you knew how important it was to him, there was no way he was going to graduate from Karasuno while he was trying to care for you, a child, work, and play volleyball.

“Ryuu, please. I know you don’t wanna quit but if you can’t pass your classes, you won’t be able to participate anyway.” He did not take well to that.

It took him time to come to his senses and in that time, you had kept you and your son away from him to allow him his space.

Apparently that was also a wrong move on your part.

He was so angry and frustrated being away from his mini me that he had easily conceded to retiring from volleyball if it meant being able to watch his little nugget learn how to sit up and crawl.

Yes, he goes HAM on the nicknames. Squirt, nugget, mini me, beanie baby, tyke, and all of the above. He pretty much calls your son everything but his actual name.

“I’m sorry for being stubborn.” He says one night while you help him study for his finals, your sleeping son swaddled in your arms.

“I’m sorry for making you give up something you love.”

“Nah, I got you and the munchkin. That’s all I need.”

Noya;

I love Noya 🥺 but at first, he is a chaotic parent. Granted y’all had your first child when you were still in college and he hadn’t the faintest clue on how to be a dad.

To be perfectly honest, you weren’t quite sure how to parent either.

Neither of you knew how to change diapers

Noya definitely got peed on more times than he wishes to admit

When your son was still a newborn, just around finals time, neither of you could figure out for the life of you why your baby was crying in the middle of the night. Which inherently made you cry because you had an 8am final and you had finished studying 5 hours prior 🙃

“Try to get some sleep, babe. I’ll take care of him.” Nishinoya’s voice was thick with exhaustion, but he knew how little you’d been sleeping since giving birth.

When you went to leave for your final, Noya was asleep in your living room rocking chair, baby safely in his arms with the both of them just snoozing away.

It was a struggle but the two of you faced the challenge together, one step at a time with your energetic four-year-old son as you graduated university. By the time you had all settled into a larger apartment together as a family, Noya had yet to pop the question. He was too busy having fun with his little man.

Sometimes it scared you how in sync he was with his child probably because he was still a child himself but it was sweet and endearing.

“Hey babe?” He asks softly after the two of you tucked away your boy for the evening. You raised in eyebrow at him, silently goading for him to continue. “Do you want to have another?” Needless to say, he sure as shit impregnated you that night asjckglpwm

Hinata;

With Hinata being an older brother, I actually see him being a wonderful dad. However, homie’s got a one-track mind and with him playing professionally, you’re usually left to do the parenting.

Your kids definitely like you more than Shoyo, not that anyone blamed anyone; they just never see daddy :(

BUT when he is in dad mode and home, you suddenly remember why you were eager as shit to have more kids with him 🥴 which explains ya you’ve got your third on the way

When he does come home, he automatically greets his older, 8 year old son with noogies and a brief wrestling session. For some reason, Hinata felt the need to compete with his own child 💀

Headass.

But when he sees his daughter, his world stops because he has favorites and EVERYONE in the Hinata house knows it

Always asking your 6 year old girl how her day was, asking how she was doing ruling over her imaginary kingdom and if she found her Prince Charming yet.

“Pffft I don’t need Prince Charming, daddy, he’s icky!!! Mommy says I don’t need a man!”

Where is the lie

“Your mom is absolutely right and you should totally listen to her, she’s the best queen in the whole world.”

Because of his one-track mind, he is engaged fully with your kids when he is actually home. Your son had naturally gotten into volleyball which, even after a long day’s practice, Shoyo spends hours training him.

“Do you think this one’s finally gonna like me more than you?” He asks one night while he’s doing the dishes after dinner, while you’re right beside him drying them off.

“Sho, our kids love you. But mom is home with them allllll day and has been since birth.”

“Can we keep trying until one of them finally likes me more?” 💀💀💀 “or until we have enough to make our own volleyball team?”

Kageyama;

How this socially inept clown got ANYONE pregnant was unthinkable. Of course, to anyone but you. After being with him all throughout high school, it was more of a wonder how you didn’t get pregnant sooner

This dude dirty. His one track mind, if not on volleyball, was entirely on you. Nearly every night was date night which ALWAYS ended with bow chicka wow wow 😏 you horny mfers yalll moved in together as soon as you graduated from Karasuno.

Clothing at home was nonexistent.

With the two of you in your second year of college, living in your apartment, and being 8 months pregnant, the air had dramatically shifted.

Kageyama’s once still high sex drive had been channeled into school work, working, and of course, volleyball. You were planning on at least completing your semester before taking time off to care for the baby. It seemed one of you would have to really step up, and from what it seems, it wasn’t going to be Tobio.

When he was home, which was very few and far between with how much he had going on, he had tried to dote on you as much as he could physically muster. Kisses here and there, bathing together, and lots of snuggles.

Kageyama is in charge of the nursery and there’s no room for argument on this. With him not being as present at home, he sets up the nursery as a way to communicate with his child that he’s never going to see because of volleyball

I love Kags, but he is nowhere near ready to even think about parenting 💀 which you tried to be patient with, but with the due date approaching very rapidly, you kinda needed him to step it up.

“I’ve helped.” He tries using the nursery as an argument and he had gone to every doctors appointment but homeboy still doesn’t know how to make a bottle or change a diaper

Was he prepared to have to clean up baby shit and vomit? Absolutely not. Was he going to anyway? Lmao, absolutely not. This boy only wants to be daddy, not dad.

Tsukishima;

It shook everyone and their mother when people found out that Kei not only had a girlfriend that he met in college, but that his girlfriend was a milf according to Kuroo and Bokuto

When you and Kei had first started dating, your daughter was already five. And while you obviously didn’t bring her to classes with you, she was always with the two of you for date nights. Oddly enough, he really didn’t mind.

His patience for kids, now that’s he’s older and kids are actually kids and NOT his peers, rivals that of Sugawara’s.

“Hey Tsukki,” your spawn asks at dinner one day. “When are you and mommy gonna get married? People keep making fun of me cause I call my parents mommy and Tsukki.”

“Making fun of people isn’t cool, it’s so lame. They’re just jealous cause they don’t get to call their parents mommy and Tsukki.”

👁—

That same night, Kei offers to read your daughter to sleep as if to reinforce the notion that mommy and Tsukki was cooler than mommy and daddy. Of course, he was pushing for this to hide that he was upset that children were making fun of her.

After that Tsukishima really gets into his dad role—walking your daughter to school with you or without you everyday, picking her up and giving her grandiose hugs. He made sure to lock eyes with every spectator, his height towering over many at the kindergarten. Silently telling them all “do not fuck with her, or you answer to me.”

He’s sosososo protective, I can’t. He ain’t scared to fight a toddler.

Even well after you and Tsukishima introduce a child of your own, your daughter still insists on calling him Tsukki and adamantly tries to teach her sister to say Tsukki instead of dada.

“You’re okay with the kids not calling you ‘Daddy’, Kei?”

“The only one I want calling me daddy is you.”

Yamaguchi;

This poor bean 💀 not only was he not prepared for fatherhood in the slightest, but twins?!

You both swore up and down they were evil. If one was hungry, the other one would refuse to eat until the other finished their meal. This applied to using their diapers as well.

Imagine the energy of Hinata and Nishinoya as baby twin boys, and lo and behold, yours and Tadashi’s kids.

While you had slightly more patience with them, knowing they were going to grow up eventually and become their own independent humans. Tadashi was not handling this well at all.

Low key, he felt like he was doing a horrible job as a parent and, after the boys had finally gone to sleep for the night, you’d spent a lot of time consoling Tadashi.

“Why can’t I be like—“

“Baby, you’ve got to stop comparing yourself to all of your friends. None of them have twin boys that are less than a year old.”

“Yeah but Hinata has three of them, so does Daichi—“

“Honey, you aren’t them. You’re you, so please, just be you.”

He’s ambitious when it comes to parenting—he wants to be the best dad ever, and he only gets better with practice.

That doesn’t make him wanna tear out his hair any less, but as the boys get older, it does get easier. We pretend their toddler years didn’t exist, it was a nightmare that Tadashi does NOT want to relive

[oh-for-fic-sake]

Right Of Passage

Masterlist

Paige crashes and interview and your hormones are kicking in!

Warnings: Fluff,Swearing, Light Smut

A/n: so here is another Fluffy chapter for my 'from house to home' series enjoy the family fluff! and tiny bit of smut. hope you enjoy xxxxx

Taglist: @two-unbeatable-beaters​ @thatgirly81​ @angelofthorr  @iloveyouyen​

You stood backstage with Paige watching on the huge tv in front of you as Henry sat on the famous white sofa talking with Ellen. You had to admit you were excited to be here apart from visiting on set occasionally and going to awards you never really did any of this public stuff. It was how both you and Henry wanted it but it was nice to get out and be involved, Paige was excited to she loved watching her daddy on telly but a lot of his films weren't age appropriate...you’d thought about letting her watch man of steel soon but you didn't want her to get upset seeing her dad in trouble or kissing another lady she hasn’t been old enough to understand yet... She also never understood how he got in the telly she was at the age when she was beginning to understand that he was filmed and then the videos were put on the tv. She jumped up and swerved trying to peek around the curtain to see what was going on.

"Paige! No come on back here, you can see daddy after sweety just watch daddy on the telly here." She pouted but relented standing next to you huffing.

She didn't understand why she couldn't go and cuddle her daddy he was right there! And true to form when your little girl was told she cant do something she really really wanted to. You sighed watching her cross her arms and pout.

"Poppet I'm sorry but this is live...So its being put on the telly now as they film it" she scoffed at you a proper three year old teenager!

"But but why? He is my daddy! Mine and and I can cuddle my daddy when I want to! Daddy said sooo!" She finished with a pout and little stomp completely and utterly miffed.

You laughed a little, ah so that’s what it was she was jealous of everyone oogling her father. You could definitely understand that the other guest was a women you didn't recognize, an actress in a new sitcom that apparently didn't know Henry was a married man with a family! She mustn't have known not with how she had been acting during the interview. She was; in your opinion to familiar with your husband you could see he was uncomfortable as she placed her hand on his leg letting it linger to long, he had cleared his throat and shifted sliding his thigh from underneath her palm quickly and flicked his eyes to her in warning.

You gave her daggers through the screen wanting to go out there, he was your man he wore your ring and everything!. The desire to run out there and climb all over him, grind in his lap and make it absolutely clear that piece of ass was yours. You faltered and blush at the thought, where had that come from? Well you knew where it had come from you were pregnant and horny and had been without your man for twelve weeks! You had yet to find the time to jump him since being here.

Ellen must have noticed the little exchange between her guests as she spoke up to Henry moving the conversation on to the next topic, one which Henry had not warned you about prior.

"And we just heard that you've had a surprise this week?" You snapped your head back to the screen it couldn't be? How the fuck? did-did he tell them? You watched as Henry grinned leaning forward nodding in excitement.He definitely did

"Yes I did. My beautiful wife bless her" he made a point to emphasize the word wife to the other woman giving her a look making her blink surprised but he continued professionally like the second long pause had been for drama. The urge to stick your tongue out a the woman and go 'ner ner na ner ner' was strong...But you didn't want Paige to tell her father so kept your tongue behind your teeth.

"She found out she was pregnant with our second child whilst I was here filming and instead of phoning me up to just tell me she arranged for her, Paige;our first born and Kal to come over and deliver the good news in person!" The audience awed as the photo Amy had taken of all four of you was put up on the screen.

You couldn't help the warmth in your chest as you watched him turn gazing softly at the photo forgetting the world around him as the huge screen showed his growing family.

The other guest visibly flinched face dropping for a second then plastered on a false smile. She hadn't known so you could let it slide...Sort of.

"Wow really? All the way from England?...That’s Paige there? Shes so big the last photo I saw was what a year ago? her brithday?" Ellen was grinning to the screen then looked back at him.

"Yes it was shes so big now and smart I find it hard to keep up sometimes shes a three-nager a sassy little moo, coming up to her fourth birthday, she starts school soon..." Ellen nodded you'd been here with Henry before promoting man of steel just after Paige was born Ellen had got a quick sneaky cuddle but nothing was really broadcast just a quick photo you'd snapped of Henry half asleep in the hospital with her all swaddled up rocking her.

"Wow school? Oh right England they start at four or five right?" He nodded enthusiastically he could sit here and gush over his family all day but had to reel it in.

"Yeah she's in preschool now and starts primary school in September...But they were both due to come over in a few weeks but brought the trip forward. Y/n knew how much I wanted another child so wanted to make it special...She had everything planned her and Paige in superwoman and supergirl t shirts surprised me onset then handed me a huge card with a note from Paige and a blown up photo of the ultrasound inside there was also a tiny superboy baby grow inside...It was a shock but I am really happy she would go so far for me...It meant a lot." Ellen chuckled nodding.

"Superboy huh?" He grinned

"Yes where we had been trying before I left she was past the first trimester when she went for her first scan and found out the gender we are having a boy this time! And I cannot wait!" Ellen glanced over to where you knew you were hidden and smirked nodding to the twitching curtain. Twitching curtain?

You froze and looked around .Where the fuck was Paige? Oh no! You looked over and saw her crouched by the curtain her tiny head peeking round, you raced over past a chuckling tech hand and tried scooping her up before she was noticed. It was took late.

"Speaking of not being able to wait, I think your kid over there can't wait to have you all to herself again." She ended with a chuckle you swore under your breath hand just curled around her pink leopard print tunic top. Paige looked back grabbing your hand and said quite loudly.

"Look Mummy people! Hi people!" And waved some waved back making her beam up at you.You heard everyone chuckle Ellen and Henry's being the loudest due to the microphone's. If you had been watching the screens you’d have notices a silent conversation between Henry and Ellen using only their eyes and with a subtle nod from Henry Ellen spoke to Paige.

"Yeah people?..Lots of people, you want to come here and sit with your dad for a bit?" Paige gasped and stood up now revealing herself completely to the stage twisting her hands in her tunic and nodded vigorously her puffy curly ponytail bobbing about, she turned giving you a look to see if its okay. You sighed nodding smoothing her hair.

"Behave and use your manners and we will do anything you want today okay?" she nodded then walked slowly unsure as the entrance to the stage was from behind the sofa and she'd have to walk around the front near the big cameras, Henry looked behind him seeing she was nervous and quickly got up running around to grab her.

She moved towards him quickly holding her arms out to her daddy making the audience coo at her then she half climbed half lifted up on his hip as he turned moving her to sit comfortably on his lap pulling at her top straightening it out. You moved back covering your face. What the fuck have you done? Your daughter that is to smart for her own good and a sassy little madam was out on live tv with her equally smart and cheeky father...God help you all.

You quickly moved to the tv again to watch the impending disaster you moved placing a hand on your bump, a habit you had when pregnant with Paige and it seems to have stuck, it was a calming motion. You giggled as Henry moved her when a knee was in the wrong place quickly tucking her legs into a more tolerable  position on his lap quietly whispering in her ear probably echoing your warning of being good.

She nodded and looked around at everyone waving cutely to some of the audience. She held onto Henry tightly resting her head on his chest as he wrapped his arm around her rubbing her leg reassuringly.

"So cute! And she really looks like you...Hi sweety! You feel better now, I've kept him for a long time huh?" She nodded unsure at first then took a deep breath.

"S'ok Miss Ellen, I can share with you." She beamed down at the little girl.

"Oh that’s so sweet, tell me are you excited to be in America with your dad?" She smiled nodding at Ellen going a little shy but surprisingly still spoke.

"Yeah! Its hot and and fun, we got to play at the pool! and we got to see daddy again!" Ellen smiled at her nodding.

"You miss your dad when hes away huh?" She nodded sadly

"Yes but he is a spy so he has to go!" You froze oh no. Ellen laughed it off glancing to Henry.

"A spy huh?" Paige nodded to her

"Yep! Last time he was away he was at spy school with his friends daddy is very good at it he is really sneaky! he sneaks me sweets when Mummy says no!....Don’t tell her...Mummy said he's too sneaky!" Ellen laughed out loud as Henry sighed rolling his eyes.

"Aha and what else does your Mom say?" You held your breath for a second praying your little girl would be kind.

"She says that he is cheeky! And she misses Daddy but its okay a'cos me and Kal cheer her up. And and she loves him...Like alot a gazillion times a day." You blinked back tears as your sweet little girl melted your heart Henry moved forward kissing her hair  she shifted on his lap.

"And I miss my girls to when I'm away poppet" she smiled giving a quiet 'I know' and attached herself to him again rubbing her face in his soft button down shirt.

Ellen smiled it was very rare to get any insight to the Cavill's. Henry guarded your privacy fiercely there was barely any photos around of his family to get an interview like this was...well it was a first no one had seen pictures of the little girl since her last birthday.

"So what do you think of your dad being Superman?" Paige sighed and tilted away from her dad he raised an eyebrow at her she mimicked him then turned to Ellen shaking her head.

"He isn't really superman...He is just playing pretend with Batman a'cos batman knows the real superman!..And superman is to busy...Its something to do with work....I think." Everyone roared up at that but Paige blinked not finding it funny she looked up to her dad frowning he just gave a cheeky grin and shook his head at her telling her not to worry.

"So hes not superman are you sure?" Paige eyed her father squinting and nodded.

"Sure" making everyone laugh again Ellen smirked trying to hold in her own chuckles.

"What makes you so sure?" You held your breath, Henry did to .Oh fuck.

"Daddy can't get Kal to take a bath!" You and Henry both sighed relaxing. Thank fuck for that.

"He can't get Kal to take a bath really?" She nodded.

"Aha if daddy was superman he could catch him a'cos superman is really fast so kal can't run away! And he could pick him up out of the bath without falling in." Ellen started laughing and Henry rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly going a little red.

"You fall in the tub with the dog once and can never live it down!"

"So your dad isn't superman?" She shook her head at Ellen. No.

"Oh okay okay... So Henry when you gonna tell her? wait until the film comes out?" She directed that to a chuckling Henry who nodded.

"She isn't old enough...We thought it might scare her seeing me in some of the fight scenes, maybe when it comes out, she will be older and hopefully understand more...She doesn't understand just yet as you can tell I'm a spy for the moment." Ellen nodded smiling Paige turned her head at him.

"Hey....Are you not a spy no more daddy? does that mean I can have a boyfreind?" you covered your mouth. Holy shit she didn't! Henry gaped like a fish looking at her flushing a very bright red as everyone seemed to find the little girl hilarious.

Ellen managed to nip in speaking to Paige before Henry could do any damage control.

"Wait you have a boyfriend?" Paige smiled rocking slowly back and forth holding the tips of her shoes tilting her head cheeks rosy completely ignoring her father stuttering behind her

"Daddy said that spy rules says spies little girls can't have one until they twenty one so I had to keep it a secret!" Ellen had to look down trying to compose herself for a second.

"So... You hid it from your dad huh?" Paige grinned nodding then looked to her dad who could do nothing but laugh wiping away a tear from how much it had tickled and embarrassed him.

"I ca-hahant believe you just said that nugget...hohahaho! oh god..Oh Paige I do love you poppet...No she doesn't have a boyfriend. She has a best friend who is a boy. A boy. Friend not boyfriend when I found out well I thought yeah"  he broke off into more chuckles.

"Yes..Spy rule huh?...Protective dad mode?..." he nodded to the host still trying to cover his chuckles wiping away tears of laughter finding this completely amusing.

"So Paige what else have you done since being here?" Paige turned from her dad then to Ellen and looked up thinking then smiled brightly.

"Oh oh! I know I found a new favite' food we ate this shell thingy!"

"Shell thing?" Henry now calmed down from his embarrassment spoke up answering Ellen becoming a toddler interpreter.

"Taco's she tried her first taco yesterday" Ellen smiled wide.

"Wow how many did you eat?" Paige sat up holding out two fingers"Wow really two whole tacos!" She smiled at the blonde woman visibly relaxing.

"Yeah but Daddy had more...And Mummy had more then Daddy but s'ok cos shes gotta feed the baby"

"Ah I see...Your gonna have a baby brother soon?" She squealed alittle to close to the microphone making people wince

"YES! HE IS THE SIZE OF AN ARTICHOKE-daddy stop pokeing meee!" You chuckled as she turned pouting batting at Henry's discretely hidden hand, poised between himself and her side that had been poking at her tummy.

"Indoor voice sweety, you were shouting again." She blinked and shrugged at 'and?!' him getting a stern warning look that sent shivers down your spine, Fuck you were gagging for it.. Especially after seeing the woman drool over him, you thanked your lucky stars that Paige hadn't said something.

Paige sighed her face dropping for a second from Henry's scolding then brightened up.

"Yeah my baby brother is is dis' big" she cupped her hands around the size of an artichoke then stretched them out wide.

"But my mummy's tummy is 'dis big, she has a big belly! And and its a boy to! I'm getting a baby brother just like Daddy promised!" Ellen smiled at her.

"Really he promised?" Paige moved kneeling up on Henry's lap 'accidentally' kicking the women beside her who grunted. And just like that with no prompting Paige turned to her.

"Oh sorry misses Lady I didn't mean to kick you den" you and Henry being her parents both knew that was a lie just by the sickeningly sweet tone.You had spoke to soon Paige was not one to let things slide and it would seem that Paige hadn't liked the other woman touching her father either.

The audience awed falling for it...it seems that she had inherited more then just her looks from her father as she 'apologized' to the woman who smiled and waved her off saying its fine.

Paige tuned away quickly to look at Ellen again bouncing holding onto Henry's thumb.

"Yes daddy promised! And I helped to he said they couldn't have a baby if I didn't stay in my own room-mmm! Hummyyyh!" Your heart jumped in your chest as Henry quickly moved holding his palm over your daughters mouth smiling chucking nervously turning bright red.

Everyone laughed casually as he did Paige grabbed at her dads hand tugging with all her might to try and remove it. Ellen then turned to the camera.

"And I'm afraid that’s all we have time for until next time and remember be kind to one another" you breathed a sigh of relief that hadn't been as bad as you thought ,as soon as the on air light went off Henry smiled thankfully to her as she chuckled shaking her head.

You made your move quickly moving out on stage ready to swoop up your baby. Paige quickly struggled and freed her face from Henry's grip whining. She didn't whine for long as he through her up in the air then swooped down and back up throwing her higher and catching her as she laughed and squealed as he did it again this time when he caught her he began tickling her then stood placing her on his hip rocking her slowly patting her bottom trying to get her to sleep, as always she curled up to him resting her head on his shoulder. He turned to you then Ellen.

"I’m so sorry since being here she has been a bit clingy,  he hasn't been able to go anywhere...I had her right there then she was just gone!" The woman laughed it off looking to the now sleepy child nodding off on Henry's shoulder who was sushing her.You was thankful in that moment that she could nod off just about anywhere

."Its fine. She was very well behaved and polite it was a pleasure speaking to her, everyone barely hears about you both! Its a treat to see her I would have her back in a heartbeat, I can't believe how big she is the last time I saw her she was still so tiny!" You laughed remembering

"She was what two weeks?" Henry nodded at you. You had stayed a little too long when he was promoting man of steel and had to have Paige here in America as you wasn't aloud to fly back home.

"Congratulations on the new baby Henry was saying in the break that your due in November?" You smiled nodding placing a hand on the bump.

"Yes I really can't wait...Henry didn't mention he was going to announce it tho...Did you babe?" He chuckled nervously licking his lips.

"S-sorry I just got excited and I did say I was going to show you off when you were pregnant this time" you hummed moving around to check Paige who had fallen asleep, the heat has really been getting to her here it was like having a sleepy baby all over again."She asleep?" You nodded to him and he finally stopped rocking and patting.

"Its fine Henry I was more concerned with what this little monkey had to say~ but I'm proud she was very well behaved considering...But I think we are going to have one hell of a day after her nap." He frowned at you

"What makes you say that?" You grinned sheepishly."When Ellen called her out I told her if she was polite and behaved then we would do what she wanted for the rest of the day... Mac donalds and swimming I think has been the request for the last few days." Ellen laughed along with Henry then leaned in giving you each a hug.

"Well we will let you go then enjoy your day and come back soon! I'd love to have you over!" You both smiled thanking her before leaving the studio.

"Well that wasn't as bad as I thought" Henry broke the silence in the car as he drove towards the hotel. You moved taking a peek at Paige asleep in her car seat sprawled out.

"Yes... I panicked when she was first out there dreading what was going to come out of her mouth." Henry nodded taking a deep breath.

"Your telling me, I did give her a quick warning beforehand that if she played up she was going straight to bed when we got back" you smiled at him nodding and leaned back silence washed over you again.

"Your not angry with me letting her out there like that are you?" You snapped your gaze to him.

"No I'm not, I don't want it to be regular tho. But I know you want to show her off a little now that she is older" He nodded then winked.

"It was mainly to get that other actress to back off, can't even remember her name but she was...To touchy." You grunted

"I noticed...So did Paige... You know she kicked her on purpose right?" He nodded to you checking the wobbed out child in the rear view mirror again.

"Yes I did jealous little nugget, I couldn't even blame her for it how bad is that? I suppose you didn't like her all over me either?" You huffed crossing your arms looking out your passenger side window.

"No I wanted to-" you flushed closing your mouth quickly he stopped at a traffic light and turned to you and poked you making you roll your eyes. He got worried thinking maybe he had done something so he continued with a few more pokes you turned to face him wriggling his eyebrows you flushed looking down shyly. His heart soared he loved that after all this time he still had it! he could turn you into a blushing schoolgirl with a look.

"Ooo you wanted to what Mrs Cavill? Claim me in front of everyone?" You squeezed your legs together as the thoughts of exactly what you wanted to do crossed your mind. images of being railed, sweaty bodies in twined grinding and rutting. you moaned quietly wringing your hands in your top then wiped your damp palms on it.

"Come on babe you can tell me?  You know I love it when you get all growly and territorial what did you want to do to show her I'm yours?~" he was right, he loved when you got all aggressive, when you took charge and fucked him! you frowned he wanted that? right well he got it! fuck it you growled turning to him before he could turn away you grasped his chin tightly tugging him forward leaning over the center arm rest.

"I'll tell you what you little shit! I wanted to come out there and dry hump the fuck outta you whilst waving your wedding ring in her stupid fucking squirrel like little face! There you happy! I wanted to fuck you till you pass out! To show her and the world exactly who you fucking belong to! And and make you beg for me to make you cum in your stupid scrumptious little trousers on live tv! " You panted going red as you ground out the words growling them out across his lips.

He blinked bright red unable to speak for all of the mans teasing, he wasn't really prepared for your outburst. You gave a chaste kiss and pulled back facing forward and stared at the traffic lights and watched them change, but Henry was frozen eyes blown wide still trying to process your filthy words as they went straight to his cock making him twitch, he took a deep breath debating weather of not it was his morals would allow him to fuck you in the car with Paige sleeping in the back....probanly not. You turned to him and awkwardly motioned to the light wanting him to move.

"Henry... The,Err the lights green.." he shook his head pulling out of his daydream of pinning you face first into you windscreen and fucking the living daylights out of you and looked back to the road moving again.

"So...Then? Hormones kicking in?..." you flushed at him sinking into your seat nodding. He smirked licking his lips remembering just how your hormones had effected you last time, the nights of endless fucking you were insatiable he had a hell of a job keeping up.

"Don't worry baby I will sort something out....If I remember last time you liked the suit I'm sure I can arrange-" you turned scowling at him your blush now spreading to your chest.

"Don’t you dare arrange anything with anyone! I mean it you little shit! Not a soul I can't have you just wandering off dressed as fucking superman! We will be caught!" He hummed giving you a cheeky side glance and placed his hand on your thigh squeezing and rubbing up and down making you tense again.

The bonus with American cars is they were mostly automatic gearboxes so he could keep his huge palm on you for the whole ride if he wanted.

"Oh love you really are wound tight huh?~ Well Zack knows about your love of the suit after last time~ okay okay! I wont Jesus...How about I see if we can have a day to ourselves I will see if Ben can look after Paige; I doubt she will act up for batman...no? No your right bad idea. Okay then we book her in for the day at the kiddy club in the hotel, could sign her up for swimming lessons and a day with the other kids in the crech? They do all sorts she would have fun" You smiled at him nodding liking that idea better.

"Then we can spend the day in bed....Or in the trailer I have a morning shoot the day after tomorrow then one at night....So I'm in the suit....Alone all day and the night shoot is rain I think so it doesn't matter if I get a little disheveled. And this one will be easier for us to slide back into place so we wont have a repeat of last time!" You blushed remebering last time. Zack may or may not have caught Henry going to town balls deep in the trailer as you screamed 'Kal' over an over role playing being pounded by the man of steel.It was only when Zack burst in Henry realized he had forgot to lock it. You cringed giving him a look.

"And I promise to lock the door this time...I could put a hat on the handle to... Or something so people know" you sighed rolling your eyes, he would do as he pleased...But if you got to fuck Superman again you weren't going to complain.

It was then that Paige stirred you heard her gasp and cry happily.

"Mac donalds! Mummy Daddy I want a- Can I have a Mac donalds please?" You smiled trust her to wake up when you were near a drive thru, the nugget could smell Mc nuggets a mile away. You tilted your head looking over to the drive thru that was across from you ,it was fairly empty a small que now that the lunch rush was over, you smiled nodded to Henry who had been eagerly waiting for permission.

Paige squealed happily as the car turned into the lot Henry turned his head to the rear view mirror as he waited in the que.

"What do you want baby girl? Nuggets?" She shook her head making him frown.

"But you always get nuggets nugget." She rolled her eyes shaking her head huffing at him.

"No daddy not today! I was good in the telly... And I’m a big girl...A big sister now so I think its time daddy." Time? He blinked not understanding you giggled as the que inched forward already guessing what she was going to say, a right of passage all children dreamed of.

"Daddy...I want a big mac... wiv lots of gherkins and a strawberry milkshake" you chuckled louder as Henry turned to face her through the center console.

"Poppet?... Here in America the big macs are really really big I don't think you could eat-" you placed a hand on his arm twisting him back around. He gave you a look of confusion.

"Get her the big mac...I promised anything she wanted...Lets get her the big mac and thank god she didn't ask for a joyride in the batmobile...Which was definitely a possibility...Get her some nuggets to incase she doesn't like it, I'm not sure if shes going to like the sauce. I'll have a large big mac extra gherkins extra cheese and strawberry milkshake"

"And a flurry!" You smiled

"Yes and two Mc flurry's" he smiled laughing

"Three big macs and Mc flurry's coming right up" as he pulled up and ordered.

Once you had your order you decided to park up and eat at one of the tables outside the restaurant. You got out your phone filming as Henry pulled out her meal placing it before her.

"Here we go poppet! One big girl big mac!" You laughed as she stared eyes wide like he had presented her with the holy grail. She shook her head bouncing in her seat excited for her first big girl mac donalds and smiled popping open the box her eyes widened.

"Wow thats so big! Look daddy looooook when I finish that my tummy will be as big as mummys! I will look like I got a baby to!" You laughed twisting the phone to see Henry on the screen still filming.

"Well you was a good girl and we did promise you anything today so you just enjoy your lunch okay poppet!" She grinned then inspected her food and frowned you and Henry began opening your own lunch sharing a look over the table as Paige blinked moving her tiny hands over then bun trying to squish it down so she could pick it up she faltered then blinked she tried again then scratched her head a little finally huffing and looked to Henry who had been watching and smirked trying to hold in a chuckle at the cute pout his daughter had.

"D-daddy....Daddy how am I? Daddy I can't pick it up" You both laughed as Henry quickly picked up the huge burger that was almost the size of her head, he held it in one hand moving it up to her she clutched his hand and the other side of the burger just getting her thumb and fingers around the bottom and middle buns. She took a bite as he held it steady for her all the while you were giggling filming her first big mac experience definitely planning to pull stills from it, hell this might even make it into the Christmas calender's you made as gifts for each year...on that thought a still of Henry's shocked face on Ellen with Paige was a good idea to...She squealed happily whilst eating making you and Henry smile.

Paige had got a quarter of the way threw the burger and was full,she didn't even have her chips or Mc flurry, she didn't care much either when you binned the melted icecream she was to happy with her 'big girl big mac' that had been wrapped up and in your hand bag for her to finish, she wouldn't let you bin it. The rest of the day had been spent lounging around the pool at the hotel Henry had played with Paige, picking her up and throwing her in the water making her scream as she kicked about paddling with her arm bands bobbing about in the water as he chased her, swimming under her being a 'shark' and tickling her feet making her laugh loudly and try to float away.

Yesterday he had another day off and had spent it with Paige having a daddy daughter day and you had made full use of the spa...Well maybe not full use there were many things you couldn't do because of the pregnancy. but you had got a facial and mani pedi and a Indian head massage then on to the more uncomfortable treatments your eyebrows done and at the prospect of your day with upcoming Henry your legs and bikini line...Yeah out of all the things you could do in a five star luxury spa it had to be the painful things you could do

You hummed you were onset again Henry had just filmed a few scenes and you was waiting by the crew for him to have the okay to run off back to his trailer.Paige was having the time of her life at the hotel kiddy club there was swimming lessons and a huge playground then fun arts and craft activities planed in the afternoon you was picking he up at 5pm when Henry had to be onset for the evening shoot.

"Sooo hows mama holding up?" you jumped about a foot in the air as Ben slid up beside you chuckling. you and Ben had got on over the week you and Paige had been here, he was brilliant with Paige understanding from his own kids how much it meant to her to meet 'batman' he'd played along and you and Henry had even had to use the old threat 'I will tell batman, I will I will phone him right now so he can come and tell you off' to get her to behave how long it will last your not sure but it had been a god send.

"Sorry didn't mean to frighten you...So you feeling? any cravings yet?"

"does sex count" he spat his drink at that laughing loudly making you chuckle.

"OOHHH I see them hormones hitting you hard huh? no wonder your out here...Wheres the other two?" you smiled at him shaking your head.

"Paige is at the kiddy club in the hotel learning not to drown and Kal is currently asleep in the trailer, Henry wore him out this morning before coming here." Ben smiled nodding watching as you eyed your man.

"So? your gonna fuck superman today?" he smiled cheekily you flushed pushing him.

"If I get my way fuck yes....Just hope this suit is easier to put back on then the last one...Got him fucking stuck nearly ripped it bless him" he blushed brightly.

"Fuck no kidding?!" you nodded to him exasperated. you smiled as Henry finally got the okay to leave and ran, yes ran to you quickly scooping you up making you giggle and kick your legs.

"Bye Ben!" you waved over Henry's shoulder he waved back shaking his head.

Without any interruptions or detours you soon found yourself in the trailer cozying up with your very own superman kissing and sucking at his neck as he moved pinning you to the bed grunting entangling his tongue with yours.he moved to place himself between your legs.

"Fuck I can’t wait to be inside you again...Been to fucking long since I stuffed you full!" you moaned as he tore at your clothes rolling you over carefully as he stripped you kissing and biting at your neck as he did. It wasn't until then you saw kal...Sitting right at the bed his tail thumping on the floor. He thought you were playing...You hoped. You tapped Henry trying to get his attention but he was to interested in flicking your nipples with his tongue.

"Babe....babe!....Hey Superman hold up!" you finally moved his head to look at you.

"Huh?" you looked at Kal who was still watching you both.

"And it’s Kal?....He don't know what we're doing do you boy?" you looked from him to the dog then back.

"Really? you think he don't know the birds and bees? And what about when we role play? what’s he gonna do when I call you Kal?." Henry laughed moving to kiss you again then pulled back licking his way across your neck and shoulder speaking between kisses

"Well...Call me...Clark then" you frowned you didn't think of that one last time you'd done the whole 'Alien meets human' scenario you poked his smug little face

"Alright smart ass" you resumed kissing at him rolling on the bed carefully then glanced feeling something hot puffs of air. Kal panting on your side.

"Babe wait...Kal come on don't be all creepy breathing on my like that boo!" Henry pulled back rolling his eyes

"Babe leave him its fine we have had sex around him before"

"Yes but he's never been so close... Its like voyeur! our son is a voyeur!!"

"Come on love he don't understand besides he watches you in the shower...He has seen you poop!....Okay okay ,Kal go lie down over there, come on off you pop" he said pressing at the Akita to the door Kal huffed and laid down a little ways from you both

"Far enough?" you nodded to him and pounced at him biting at his neck making him moan low in his throat he pressed you back bringing his hands to the apex of your thighs moving them slow and steady rubbing at your needy pussy whilst talking up a role play for you which was incredible.

"Fuck,I don't normally do this but you, you are fucking magnificent, you owe me little woman! saving you as I did, its not often I ask for anything in return but fuck if I don't want to fuck you~, tell me you going to let me fuck you? let superman cum in that little hot cunt as a reward?" you moaned tho cheesy and cliche you couldn't resist as he moved his hot mouth across your tits sucking and pulling at the overly sensitive flesh as he dipped his fingers inside of you rolling your bud with his finger he nuzzled his face across your stomach slowly placing a chaste kiss over your unborn.

The moment was ruined when Kal gave a small 'boof' making you both jump about a foot scared shitless as the bear had crept back to the bed resting his chin on the mattress staring at the both of you Knowingly. Kal didn't like you fucking whilst pregnant apparently that. You sighed telling him to go lay down and he did .....on the bed next to you shoving Henry away from you with his big furry head resting it on your belly blinking up at his dad with puppy eyes.

You laughed at the look on Henry's face, superman had just been cock blocked by his puppy and you roared with laughter unable to stop petting the silly bear.

"Oh god hahaha! Kal please come on off boy! Mummy and daddy want some alone time..." The bear huffed.No. he stayed still looking at you and Henry with just his eyes pretending to ignore you both. Henry sighed leaning over him.

"Okay then son here's the deal...You let me go at your mother for and hour and I promise you the biggest rawhide chicken treat I can find? okay deal?" you giggled as Kal’s ears perked up at the word chicken. He was thinking about it so you added to it trying to convince your four legged son.

"Just think Kal....A big stick of raw hide chew with a huge slab of dried chicken all to your self, and either of us will take it away when we think it will spoil your dinner...you get the whole thing in one sitting?...oh and did you know there are some huge treats after all it is America" he barked happily wagging his tail and jumped off the bed disappearing to the other end of the trailer. you and Henry blinked at him you recovered first scowling at Henry.

"And you said he didn't know what we were doing! fucking damn right he new!" Henry shook his head laughing uncomfortably

"He scares me sometimes..."

"No shit!"

"Now where were we? we only have an hour~" you giggled as he dived back down ready to spend the time Kal had allowed you ravishing each other. Kal did not give you an hour, being generous pup he was he gave you two.

[yoonjinkooked]

CHEMISTRY | Run (2)

PART 2 - RUN

SERIES MASTERLIST

DRABBLE SERIES, TONS OF SHORT LITTLE CHAPTERS. WILL BE UPDATED OFTEN CAUSE HOSEOK IS THE #1 SOURCE OF MY PAIN

Pairing: Hoseok / Reader

Rating: 18+

Genre: FWB, university AU

Warnings: cursing, avoiding emotions and responsibility, future smut, Hoseok just makes a cameo in this one

Word count for this part: 2K

Summary: After a few years of being immune to Jung Hoseok’s charms, you suddenly fall into them, head first. All it takes is one night, too much alcohol and a lot of balls.

“Rise and shine, you drunk idiot,” are the words with which Seokjin greets you. The massive headache that you are suffering makes his voice sound 20 times louder than it really is, which is not your favorite way of starting hangover Sundays. Despite knowing that he won’t be deterred from waking you up, you still keep your eyes closed, hoping that today is a day of miracles and Seokjin decides to give you a break. He doesn’t - instead he grabs a hold of the ankle of your left foot and starts shaking it left to right, trying to shake you awake. “Come on, you’ve been out the whole day, I was scared you were dead. Get your ass up, take an aspirin and be an adult.”

“That sounds like a plan,” your voice is worn out, a tell-tale sign that you had spent last night yelling into someone’s ear. “God, why did you let me drink this much? You should have forced water down my throat,” you grunt as you struggle to get yourself into a seated position - you don’t fall back and the room is not spinning. So far, so good. 

“Oh, I was planning on doing that,” Seokjin grins down at you, not looking the least bit hungover - genes, he’d tell you with a proud look on his face. “But by the time I returned from the kitchen, you already had Hoseok’s tongue down your throat.”

And then, you remember. Boy oh boy, do you remember. Seokjin laughs at you, amused by your expression as realization sets in. You’ve hooked up with Hoseok. You’ve made out with Hoseok. And you did, in fact, sit on his dick, just like you’ve wanted to. Luckily for you, you were both fully clothed. Seriously, lucky you - if you remember anything in detail, it’s that you weren’t alone. 

“Everyone saw us last night, didn’t they?” you ask, sighing when Seokjin nods immediately. 

“Everyone. I mean, you were hardly being shy about it, jumping his bones in the middle of the living room,” Seokjin reminds you how straightforward, perhaps even pushy, you were with Hoseok. Both before and after the kissing had started. “For what it’s worth, he wasn’t complaining.”

“I have no idea what had gotten into me,” you admit, trying to recall when, if ever, you’ve thought of Hoseok as more than a friend. And you did not - he was always a friend, that good looking friend that you wouldn’t even consider as a possible hook up option. Your brain had short-circuited last night, and although surprising, it isn’t completely unfounded. 

“Well, Hoseok did not, I can assure you,” Seokjin is laughing his ass, his expression softening a bit when he notices just how uncomfortable you are with his teasing. “Come on Y/N, don’t overthink this. You’re both single and hot. You were horny and he was stoned and happy to help. Making out with him once won’t change your friendship, if that’s what you’re thinking.” 

“Yeah, in theory,” you mumble, knowing already that the next time you see Hoseok, you will feel very awkward. Maybe he won’t and that saves the day? It’s a possibility, but you’re not almighty and situations like these tend to turn you into an awkward mess of a person. 

“You’ve made out with Jimin before and you’re still close,” Seokjin shrugs. 

“Yeah, but that’s different. That’s Jimin. We did it jokingly, more than anything else,” you shake your head, knowing, remembering  that whatever last night was, it was different. “I have no clue what happened. One second he was there, dancing, minding his own business and the next I just… had this strong urge to kiss him.”

“Well, at least you’re a go-getter,” Seokjin laughs at your glare, still refusing to accept this as a possible issue in the making. “Come on, I didn’t walk all the way to your place for therapy hour. You’re nursing a hangover and we need coffee. When you have enough caffeine in your system, you’ll remember that Hobi is the chillest guy on the planet and that your worries are completely baseless. It can be awkward for a week or two but you’re both grown adults, right?”

“Right,” you agree, choosing to hold onto that thought. You’re not kids or horny teens - it’ll be okay. A few inside jokes, a couple of days of awkwardness and a lifetime of teasing from your mutual friends - nothing you can’t handle. No harm, no foul. It’ll all be hilarious in a week or two. 

“You’re acting weird,” Jungkook’s statement makes you freeze, the breakfast burrito in your hands inches away from your mouth. After years of being friends with him, it shouldn’t be a surprise when Jungkook says the most random things at the most random times, but somehow, it still is. 

“No, I’m not,” you deny. 

“You are,” Jungkook nods, as if he is confirming it with himself. “You’re all jumpy. If I didn’t know you any better, I’d think you’re on the run from the law,” he laughs at his own joke, before suddenly stopping to fix you with a suspicious look. “You’re not on the run, right?” 

“No Jungkook, I’m not hiding from the cops. I’m not even halfway through my first coffee.”

“She’s just hiding from Hobi.”

You glare at Namjoon from across the table. First of all, his assumption is rude. Second of all, it is absolutely correct. Well, you weren’t exactly actively avoiding Hoseok, but you also weren’t volunteering to spend time at places where you knew he’d be. Instead, you have spent the past few days occupying yourself with random and not so random tasks and obligations, all while trying not to think about how he’s a good kisser. Or how good he smells. Or how firmly his hands gripped your waist that night. Nope. Not going to think about it. 

“Why would she hide from Hobi?” Jungkook is confused. 

“I’m not hiding from Hobi,” you tell him, before turning to give Namjoon a pointed look. “I’m not hiding from Hobi,” you repeat in a warning tone - it’s clear that you don’t want to talk about it. 

“Perfect,” Namjoon offers you an angelic smile. “Then you won’t have a problem with him joining us? I mean, he’s already walking our way,” he adds, looking over your shoulder. 

Your knee jerk reaction is very literal - a sudden movement leads to a loud bang, a whine and you clutching onto your right knee that you’ve just hit against the table in a lame attempt of making a run for it. Panicked, you turn around to check if Hoseok had seen this, only to realize that he is nowhere to be seen. The shit eating grin on Namjoon’s face when you look back at him is confirmation enough. “I hate you,” you deadpan as he keeps on laughing at you. 

“Why are you like this,” Jungkook asks you as you rub your knee, still very much in pain. “Is it because you made out last weekend?” he interrogates you before chugging on his yogurt. 

“Maybe,” you reluctantly admit, since you were so obvious there was no use in denying it. “I know it doesn���t make much sense but it’s just… weird.” 

“You’re being overdramatic, as usual,” Namjoon chuckles. In moments like these, you wonder why you’re still friends with the guy. Sure, he can be charming, nice and helpful, but he can also be a smartass and act all high and mighty, just like he is doing now. “Not that you would know, since you’re hiding from the guy, but Hoseok is not avoiding you. The situation isn’t weird - you are.” 

“If I wanted therapy, I’d pay for a professional,” you snap. 

“I’m on Y/N’s side here,” Jungkook pauses to swallow his food before continuing. “We can tease and joke, we always do that but we shouldn’t invalidate her feelings. If she is feeling awkward, she has every right to feel that way. Don’t invalidate her feelings, Joon,” he ends his speech with a little worried pout, making himself look at least 5 years younger. 

“Have you been watching Dr. Phil again?” Namjoon asks him. 

“Hey!” you jump in Jungkook’s defense immediately. “Don’t be an ass - he has a point and he is being nice. I didn’t ask for your opinion, which you generously offered anyways. Hoseok’s feelings about this have no affect on me - I’m feeling awkward and I’d rather push said awkwardness under the rug for the time being.” 

“Unlike Mr. Smarty Pants Architect who actually does watch Dr. Phil, I’m the only psych major sitting at this table,” Jungkook starts and you laugh at the not so subtle drag directed at Joon. “It’s my duty as your friend and a future therapist to say that the tactic you’re turning to is not healthy and will likely cause more trouble. But,” he emphasizes, noticing that you have already opened your mouth to complain. “It’s your choice. You know what you’re doing and why you’re doing it.”

“Oh, so you’re saying that her acting like the two of them have divorced after 20 years of marriage instead of… exchanging saliva is valid?”

“Stop!” you glare at Namjoon. “You’ve heard Jungkook – my feelings are valid.”

“You’re a coward and you know it,” Namjoon laughs at you. He’s not completely wrong – you are a coward, but you also have your reasons. “You were making out – it’s not the end of the world.” 

“Yes, but it’s not a random dude we’re talking about here!  It’s... Hoseok!” you whisper his name, as if someone other than the two of them could actually hear you say his name in the crowded and incredibly noisy university cafeteria. 

“All the more,” Joon widens his arms in exasperation. “Hobi is not an ass. He’s not going to make it worse, he’ll probably laugh about it, but seeing as you’ve been playing hide and seek, you won’t have a chance to. The longer you wait, the harder it will be once you can no longer avoid him. And honestly, the time is around the corner because I have no idea how you plan on skipping Yoongi’s birthday party.”

As if you needed a reminder of that. There is no way in hell that you can make up an excuse big enough to avoid going to Yoongi’s party - a family emergency wouldn’t work, not when this is your closest group of friends. You’ll have to be there, Hoseok will absolutely be there and you have three whole days to get your shit together. 

“I’ll do my shit at my own time,” you conclude proudly, knowing that you will figure it out and it won’t be because of Namjoon’s impromptu intervention. 

“Um… Y/N,” Jungkook lets out a nervous laughter. “I’m not so sure about that. Hobi’s walking towards us, right now.”

“I’m not falling for that again,” you wave your hand in dismissal, the pain that you are still feeling in your right knee reminding you of Joon’s failed attempts to trick you. 

“He’s really not lying,” Namjoon sips on his coffee sassily, the slurping sound coming from his straw making you want to throw something at him. But there’s something about the cocky look on his face that makes you realize that he’s not joking this time. Not to mention that Jungkook, unlike Joon, is an actual sweetheart of a person who would not lie to you just to spite you. Gulping, you decide to risk and check. 

And sure enough, as you turn around you can see Hoseok just a few tables away, smiling at the three of you – ripped jeans, white shirt, green snapback and that stupid, blinding smile. For a second, only for a second, your eyes meet and before either one of you can make a face or react in any way, you are standing up and this time around, your knees are safe. 

“I have to go,” you grab your bag and phone and speed walk before anyone can tell you anything. You can hear Jungkook yell after you, but you’re already a few tables away from them, walking towards safety as fast as you can. 

Was it stupid? Yeah, probably. Was it obvious? Painfully. But fight or flight kicked in and up up and away you went. 

[monsoonblooms12]

Detectives By Chance: Ch-6 Unforeseen

A/N: Hi, how is everyone doing? I took a nice break to get a grip on myself and it really worked wonders. So sorry for taking such a long time to get this out. I hope this will be worth the wait!💛

Series Summary: It was supposed to be a usual weekend for the four. Coffee, fun, friends and love. But an unexpected case changed their lives in a way they had never imagined. A mystery - a murder - many secrets… Will Ethan, Pooja, Alexandra and Mark, be able to survive? Or will the circumstances twist and break their lives forever?

Pairing: Ethan × f!MC (Dr. Pooja Sharma)

Disclaimer: PB owns most of the characters. I only own the OCs and my MC.

Word count: 1890

Triggers: Mentions of murder

Rating: General

I am participating in this week’s @wackydrabbles​. The prompt for this week is “I meant every word.” and it will appear in bold.

CATCH UP HERE!

Sometimes Destiny, has a strange sense of humour,

When we think it is the end, it is usually just the beginning.

The four had just fallen asleep when sudden banging of the door woke them up. 

Ethan woke up abruptly. He saw how peacefully Pooja was sleeping. 

Ethan didn't want to wake her up. 

He got out of the bed and took a look at the clock. 

7 in the morning. 

It was pretty late as compared to his usual waking time. But after everything they did last night, they were tired as hell and hence it felt like they had slept not 4 hrs but 40 minutes. 

Yawning, he got to the door and was very, very, taken aback.

Standing by the door, was the Police.

"Officers, How may I help you?" Ethan inquired in a very professional tone.

"Dr Ramsey. Sorry to disturb you at such an early hour. We wanted some information." The police officer standing at the front informed.

Ethan let out a heavy sigh but knew better than to argue with them. So he acknowledged, "Please come in. People around will be concerned if they see the Police standing at my doorstep." He stepped aside to let them in. 

By the time, Mark, Alex and Pooja had also waken up due to the sounds and came out of their rooms. All three were surprised to see the Police.

The officers too, stopped short on seeing them. Their gazes stopped on Mark and Alex.

"Look who we have here." One of the officers implied to the other, pointing at Mark and Alex.

"Seems like our work here has become a lot easier."

"Excuse me, Officer, what exactly are you talking about? You stated you wanted information." Ethan said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, we wanted information about the whereabouts of Dr Danvers and Dr Walton." The way the Officer emphasized whereabouts was enough for them to know that something was wrong.

"Officers, we are here. Tell us what you wanna know." Mark spoke before Ethan could say anything.

"Sure, Dr. Danvers. You have an awful amount of confidence for a criminal." The Officer scoffed.

This time it was Pooja who spoke. "Wait! What? No, No what? CRIMINALS?"

"Of course, Dr Sharma. Not just mere criminals, these two are Cold Blooded Murderers." The police officer grumbled.

"Officer, I am sure there has been some misunderstanding. They both were with us all the time. Lex, er, Dr Walton and me, we discovered the body together." Pooja tried to intervene.

"Oh yes, Dr. Sharma? Then how on Earth did the original key of the patient's room get into the office of MARK DANVERS?" The man shouted the last words.

"WHAT! How is that even possible? I didn't even know the real key of the room was missing until the body was discovered!" Mark replied in his defence.

"Save it, Dr. Danvers, Save it. Tell all you want to tell in the court. Besides, that is not the only proof we have. We have asked your neighbours about your whereabouts on the night of the murder. Some of them say you two returning late at night, and as per their description, that is just after the time of the murder.” 

“Also, while scanning Mr Davis's room, your fingerprints and a piece of paper with both of your names was found. When we questioned his colleagues, it was revealed to be his handwriting. He wrote in that way in a hurry. So, I guess that enough proof for us to arrest you two." The Police laid all the information in front of them.

"All this is BULLSHIT. We did not do anything like that. All this is a lie." Alex was on the verge of a breakdown. 

She made a motion to grab one of the officers' collar when Pooja grabbed her and stopped her from doing anything that would make matters worse.

"No Lex, you won't. Don't make matters worse, I beg you." Hearing Pooja's plea, Alex calmed down.

"Dr Mark Danvers, Dr Alexandra Walton, you both are under arrest. Kindly follow us." The police officer said in an almost ruthless voice. 

Alex was about to intervene, but Mark grabbed her hand. 

Ethan laid a hand on Mark's shoulder and assured, "We promise we will get you both out before they can present you before the court. We promise." 

Mark turned around, gave him and Pooja a one-armed hug. Alex too, hugged the both of them, and then the two went away, holding hands all the time.

After the Police had left, Ethan and Pooja sat down on the couch. Never had they imagined that this would be the beginning of their morning.

"How the freaking hell did this happen? They are innocent, we know they didn't do anything." Pooja was breaking down again.

"Yes, we know. And now we have to prove it. We need to find evidence that can free Mark and Alex up. Something which can prove their innocence. We need to check Miles Danvers's private clinic. That is our only hope." Ethan answered.

 The two of them hurriedly got dressed and set off to the second address. 

The address they had never checked.

It took a good 35 minutes took 3147, Rainy Day Drive. The day was cloudy and grey, and the street looked gloomy but less terrifying as compared to last night.

 Ethan let out a dry laugh and said, "One rainy day brings us to Rainy day drive." They looked around to locate the clinic. But where they arrived appeared so broken and messy that it was obvious that it had been through a lot.

Taking a look at the status of the place, and thought of Pooja's condition.

"Rookie," Ethan said.

"Hmm?"

"I am going in there."

"Of course. I am going in too. Wasn't that why we came here?" Pooja questioned, surprised why Ethan was stating the obvious.

"No, I said I am going in, not we, Poo."

"What the hell do you mean by that? You are trying to say that you are going to that place alone? Is this really the time to play jokes, E?" Pooja charged, angry and worried.

"I am not kidding, Poo. I meant every word."

He cupped her cheeks. 

"Rookie, please try to understand, okay? My priority is and will always be you. I can't let you get hurt in any way. I will go there first and check if everything is alright. If all is clear, I will send you a text. Then you can come in." Ethan tried to explain.

"And if everything is not clear?"

"Then I will search alone and keep you updated if I find anything."

"You mean that I should leave you alone in the fire?"

"Poo, I am just going to check. This place is so old, I don't think there will be any trouble in there. But I promised that I would protect you at any cost. See it just as me keeping my promise."

"But what if-"

"No, what-ifs. I am going. I will check and update you soon. Promise me you won't go in until I tell you too."

"But Et-"

"Promise?"

"Ethan, List-"

"Promise?"

"Fine, Promise. But in case you see any trouble, text me at that moment. I will come running."

"Promise, Rookie, Promise."

Before Pooja could say anything else, Ethan had already walked into the dilapidated building. So she had nothing else to do other than wait.

While waiting, Pooja tried to arrange all the information they had in her mind. She started surfing the web to know more about Mr Davis and the 2011 scam he had supposedly conducted. About 100 people had lost tons of money in that scam, and it was pointed out that since 2011, Mr Davis started living a rich life. He said it was from his inheritance of his dead uncle and a promotion, but now, it was obvious that it was all the money from the scam.

What a criminal! Only if he had got caught, maybe then all the hassle, worries and pain that entered their life without as much as a precaution, could have been avoided, Pooja grunted. Her heart grieved on remembering Mark and Alex. "They don't deserve this.", she thought.

She checked her phone and, Oh dear! Thirty minutes had passed by, but there was neither any text nor any sign of Ethan. She was worried sick. But she had promised, and Pooja had been known for keeping her promises. When she promised something, she always fulfilled it, no matter what. 

Suddenly her phone lighted up with a 'Ping!' making her aware of a new notification. She saw Ethan's name light up on her screen, and without even glancing at the text he had sent, she rushed into the ruptured clinic.

Once inside, she looked around. The place was dark, had a look of a horror house and smelt sickening. Pooja turned on the flashlight of her phone and began to look around. She sensed something was eerie. She presumed that the moment she would walk in, she would see Ethan.

But the place was soundless. Her heart thumped with panic.

"Ethan! Ethan! Ethan, can you hear me? Ethan, please reply I-I am scared. ETHAN!" Pooja screeched but met with silence. Dismay and agony made her feel weak. She sat down on her knees and began weeping.

"Now is not the time to breakdown." Pooja thought to herself and urged her body to stand up. 

"Keep calm, Keep calm for Ethan." She reiterated the words in her mind like a prayer holding her up.

Suddenly, she recollected that she never checked the text Ethan sent. She opened Ethan's text, but it did not read "All clear".

It read, "MiD To."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? MiD, MiD, MiD..." Pooja thought harder and harder, overlooking everything, only focusing on the letters M.i.D.

"MiD, MiD... Oh, hell!" It struck her like lightning. "MiD is M-Miles Danvers. Oh my god!"

Suddenly, the sound of her phone ringing jolted her out of her thought process and spread an alarm through her body. She hoped, desperately for it to be Ethan.

But she saw that it was an unknown number. Her first thought was to ignore it, but then she wondered, "What if, what if it is Ethan? Trying to reach her and tell her where he was?"

She acknowledged the call. "Hello?"

"Ahh!!" A hoarse voice uttered from the other end. "Dr Sharma, is it?"

"Who the hell are you? I don't have time for any of your shit." Pooja fumed.

"But you surely have time for Dr Ramsey, don't you?" The man implied with cruel amusement in his voice.

"What the-? How the hell-? Wait, are- are you Miles Danvers?"

The man let out a menacing chortle, more like a crackle of a witch. "Oh, yes! I am. And don't worry! Your dearest boyfriend is here, in my utmost care, and under my most watchful eye."

The humour in his voice went away, and a nerve chilling sinister voice revealed, "If you want to save him and your dearest best friends, come to the address I am sending you as soon as possible. Don't you dare ignore this call. Well, unless you want them to rot and die. Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha."

PS: If you enjoyed the story, please like, leave a comment or reblog. Your feedback keeps me going💕. Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you have a great day ahead!

Tags (Please let me know if you like to be added or removed) :@bbrandy2002 @whimsicallywayward15 @ohramsey  @nervoussaladsludgeopera @trrfanaddict @hopelessromanticmonie @imonlybibecauseofethanramsey @lovablegranny @bellcat2010 @gkittylove99 @starrystarrytrouble @3riche @chetachisblog @zoehanji @withbeautyandrage  @drariellevalentine @mvalentine ​ @aestheticartsx ​@angela8754​ @schnitzelbutterfingers ​ @ao719 ​ @choicesstan1 @arnikki-2406 ​ @neotericthemis ​ @anotherbeingsworld @maurine07 @sophxwithers @twinkleallnight

[mimiplaysgames]

Terra Week Day 2 (Youth/Fashion)

Summary: All Terra wants to do is be calm before the storm. Then  Lea plays a joke on him. And Isa talks to him about the past. Life is full of lemons and lemonade. | Word Count: 3,306

Read on AO3

A/N:  For Terra Week 2021! You can find that account on Twitter!

~*~*~*~*~

The Tenets of a Master, Ch. 2

Our hearts live free in our Youth Children shine Light with their truth

“Let me tell you something—don’t get offended, okay?”

Terra’s answer is a nervous chuckle. 

“Cross your heart,” Lea insists.

“I don’t know what that means.”

It’s a sunny afternoon at the eastern shore of Destiny Islands. Lea props his elbow on their shared beach table, ignoring his empty plate (he’s planning on being last for the barbecue, all for the extra saturation of flavor on the scraps). Terra is enjoying a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice, pulp included. Lea narrows his eyes as if scanning Terra’s face, who is slurping another gulp. 

“Are you bothered by the way I’m drinking?” 

“I’m trying to decide if you’re the type to kick me under the table or punch me in the face.”

“That sounds more like Aqua.”

“She’d really—?”

“If you’re rude. Yeah.”

Lea smirks. “How rude, exactly?”

Terra was going to say that he’s seen her curse twice in the lifetime he’s known her, but something about that embarrasses him. Something about the way Lea studies him, about the way the other Keybearers address him so formally when they’re much more relaxed with each other. It makes him feel targeted. He’s never considered that he was weird until he’s surrounded by other people.

“Why don’t you spit out what you want to say.” 

“What’s with the uniform?” Lea asks, pointing vaguely at his chest and arm. “The crossed suspenders, the armor… You could break bones with those fancy shoes.”

“They’re… proper attire for a wielder? This is the crest of Mastery.” Terra points to his belt buckle. “To remind you of your goals. The armor to protect you from Darkness.” He holds his forearm, rubbing the metal like a friend in need of comfort. “The cross is a label, the Mark of Duty, so that anyone in need can find you.”

Lea snorts and immediately pulls out his Gummiphone, typing a quick message with a grin that knows an inside joke. Holding his chin, he opens his mouth as if to say something, then shakes his head and all the words out of it. “Exactly my point.”

“Your point?”

“You three kind of carry yourselves like you have sticks up your asses.”

Terra chokes on his drink. “What?”

Lea puffs out his chest and broadens his shoulders—he’s trying to imitate someone stiff and intimidating, but it doesn’t work. Not with a lanky body like that. “Have you seen the way you walk?” He wiggles his shoulders robotically. “Like there’s a five-foot pole shoved right up the asshole, all the way to the forehead.” 

Yeah, that would earn him a kick under the table if Aqua’s the one to hear it. At least, if anything, Lea makes it easy to smile.

“Admit it. You think the armor is cool.” Terra sure did when he forged it for the first time, telling Aqua that his first beta mold was not big enough.

Lea is quick to shut up, choosing his words too carefully. “A jacket would be nice. The peacoat types with the elbow padding.” 

“Or a cloak.” Terra chugs the last of his juice.

“Not a bad idea. Would look good with the hair.” Lea points up to Terra’s spiky crown. “You should talk to Isa. He likes to dress nice.” Standing up and crossing to the other side, he shoves Terra in the shoulder. “But seriously. You scare the other kids. We should address that.”

Terra swallows, his juice thick and gooey. 

It’s not really their fault, is it?

Maybe Terra is paranoid, but it seems like Roxas is avoiding him. Not that he deserves any blame—Roxas must have lots of stories to tell about Terra’s face. After all, it’s strange for Terra to look at someone with Ven’s face but with all the misplaced expressions. Right now, Roxas is the furthest away from Terra in the group, choosing to stand near the water with hands in his pockets. Riku is next to him, carrying two plates. They’re listening to Ven talk. 

Xion keeps to herself, but she also has a hard time looking Terra in the eyes. Terra’s been tempted to ask about her story, how she’s gotten here and whether Terra’s face has hurt her, but he’s afraid to ask. She’s with Kairi and Aqua, sharing fruity drinks with pineapple wedges on the rims.

“I scare them?”

“You are like a robot about to punch anyone who looks at you wrong. You need some sway. You know, like you’re a buddy. A teddy bear. Give me a hug, you know, that kind of vibe?” 

Terra’s never thought about it before. Master Eraqus emphasized the pride, the strength, the confidence. Walk it and you shall embody it. To be professional is to be trusted. But times have changed, and Terra needs to catch up. “Will you show me?”

The way Lea walks is the type you see among scheming minions guarding a castle atop grassless mountains (at least from the picture books Terra used to read as a kid). The sort of bravado that promises some and lies even more. Everyone thinks Lea is fun to hang around with, though (and truthfully, he is). He’d know better, and if this helps to melt the ice and make everyone comfortable with Terra, so be it.

“More weight to your step,” Lea says, ending his sentence with a pop and snapping his fingers. He straightens up to imitate Terra’s posture, almost on his toes. “You’re up here, like you’re trying not to shit yourself.”

That sounds easy enough. Terra swings his arms more, bending his knees every time he plants his foot so that he bobs up and down. It earns finger-points, whoops and snickers from the others. Lea brags about what a good job he’s done, signaling to Roxas specifically who shakes his head in disapproval (Ven looks toward the horizon out of embarrassment). 

Aqua has a tight smile and pretends to sip when Terra approaches. She leans close and whispers, “What have you been drinking?” 

“A crappy sense of humor.”

As much as Aqua wants to fight it, she snorts, and hands him her drink, speaking even lower so no one hears. “I bet ten munny this is better.”

It’s too sweet.

“Lea is so mean. He thinks you’re such an easy target,” Xion says, staring at the sand. That smile though is bingo, an improvement above the rest, so Lea’s done his job. She pulls out her Gummiphone and starts to type. Glancing at Terra, she corrects herself, “Sir.”

There’s no need for Sir but should Terra tell her that to make it more casual or would that be disrespectful to her wishes? 

A mock-laugh echoes through the beach when Lea checks his phone and lets everyone know that he still is very proud of himself. Xion sticks her tongue out at him. 

“I think it’s good for him, having this much fun,” Kairi says, swirling her straw. “Sometimes Lea can get too serious.” 

That doesn’t sound like Lea but Terra notices how engrossed he is in typing on his phone without a smile, totally not engaged in the conversation Roxas is having with Riku. Maybe Terra doesn’t know as much as he thinks he does. Maybe first impressions are fallacies. 

Smiles can be painted.

Like Kairi’s, her small grin a mask that doesn’t suit her. Terra would act the same, too, if one of his best friends, his family really, went missing.

“Naminé and the others are on their way,” Kairi says after she checks her phone. “We should go to her.”

“They’re not meeting us here?” Aqua asks.

“The sunset is much nicer on the other side of the island.” There goes Kairi’s painted smile. “But the water is bluer here. Good photo ops no matter where you are.”

“It’s a simple walk over, right?”

“Yes, ma’am. You’ll recognize the spot.”

The island is small, connected by caves and overcrowded with palm trees that hide how far the beach stretches. For some reason there’s a lingering ache somewhere in Terra’s stomach. He’s been at this beach before, but he is skeptical of that, as if the last and only time he was here was some sort of déja vu but he can’t picture what he’s supposed to remember. 

Maybe this is coming from Xehanort. That thought alone is both worrisome and exciting. 

“You ok?”

Riku lags behind with him as the rest of the group hikes through the sand. Aqua turns her back over and motions to do the same. It makes sense why she’s concerned—Terra is making it look like he’s isolating himself.

“I’m fine, just…” This world is so small. How crazy it is that it was that long ago when Terra sensed how Riku felt the same way. So much truth spoken in this small cluster of sand and water. 

Riku knowingly places his hands on his waist. Terra’s living protegé, successor, superior, all humility wrapped in pride with something that looks similar to guilty written on his face.

“I think I need some alone time. Tell Aqua five minutes,” Terra says. 

Riku smiles like he’s been there, done that millions of times before. “Will do.” He steps off, giving Aqua a wave of his hand that stops her in her tracks. 

When the voices fade and the water laps and crashes, Terra listens for something foreign but familiar. He follows the trail of shoe marks in the sand slowly, stepping stones to a moment he hopes might set off a little spark. Setting aside the vague fear of connecting hearts with someone dead and dangerous, he’s hoping for a lightning bolt, a sudden flash and then boom, he knows Rainfell is safe and sound.

But what he feels is as vacant as the ocean sprawled before him, like he’s stared at it for years. It’s making him anxious, how he wants to walk the surface and see what’s on the other side of the horizon. If the water drops off the edge of a cliff, if he falls all the way down to hell. 

And then, nothing. His heart sinks.

But why, though? Being spared from connecting to Xehanort means he gets to keep some sanity—

—but it also means that he’ll never reconnect with Master Eraqus ever again. Death is death, a door that goes one way. 

Maybe Terra is a terrible person for being so disappointed. 

A buzz in his pocket snaps him back to a reality where the sun is on its way to setting, and just like that, Terra feels lighter. 

He’s expecting a text from Aqua or Ven, but what he gets is:

kairi

at waterfall icymi

icymi?

Terra looks around for a sign. Shouts and laughter whisper from somewhere far away, followed by a splash of water. 

“Lost?”

Behind him is none other than Isa, put together in a tracksuit so impeccable it’d be a shame to sweat in. 

“I’m looking for Iseemee Waterfall.”

“Excuse me?”

“I think that’s where everyone else is.” Terra shows him the screen. 

Isa purses his lips as though he has found something amusing. “This island only marches in two directions. We’ll pass by it eventually.” He gestures to invite Terra to accompany him—come to think of it, Isa tends to keep to himself, his visits sparse and quick, usually speaking only when spoken to. “Ventus has offered a game of frisbee with me,” he says like it’s a blessing. “I found it to be very respectable.”

“He’s a good kid.” Terra can’t think of anything else to say except to repay the compliment. “Roxas is pretty cool.”

Isa flashes him a set of wide eyes before giving him a smile that’s equal parts unsettling and clairvoyant. “Roxas has his ways. You understand.”

“Of course.” Terra crosses his arms. The sand here sinks deep. “I just don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”

“Nothing.” Deadpan and matter-of-fact are words Terra would use to describe the way Isa speaks, with a touch of softness that is too vulnerable to let itself be transparent. “Roxas will need some time to adjust to your face.”

Terra sighs.

“You can bribe him with a game.” Isa’s smiles are controlled but sincere, a ghost given life again but not sure how to use it. “He likes to win.”

That seems so simple yet why has Terra never thought of it? “Thanks for the pointers.”

Silence settles with them alongside the seabirds gawking over them, not awkward but not comfortable either, bringing with it a loss for words and a question hanging in the air that doesn’t get asked. They finally arrive at the spot: the same place Terra’s been before, at the same pier with lazy trees that bend near-parallel to the ground and grow star-shaped fruit. Everyone else is already here, Naminé a beaming pillar of light in her white dress, shy and nervous to dip her toes in the water. 

Isa takes a seat on a rockface next to the lowest-hanging tree. 

“May I admit,” Isa says, his hands splayed on his lap as he watches the ocean turn purple, “it is also strange for me to look upon your face.” There’s no waver to his voice, no hesitation. Isa is brave.

“I don’t blame you.” Seems like a common theme: leave a trail of suffering, and everyone’s going to remember you for it. “Actually, I wanted to ask you something.”

“You may go ahead.”

“I want to help Aqua find her Keyblade.”

Even Isa’s chuckles have restraint and poise. “I wouldn’t know of such a thing.”

“I was the last one to have it.”

“You mean Xehanort.”

“Well…”

“A matter of a different person. I must insist so.”

“You knew him.”

“I did not. You overestimate the time he lived in your body. The majority of those years were under Xemnas’s control.”

“Xemnas.”

“His Nobody. Or rather, yours.”

Terra can’t help it. He has to chuckle. “I appreciate your straightforwardness.”

Isa turns to face him. “Lea tells me you consider the X crossed over your chest as a mark to bear with pride.”

It slaps Terra in the face. Isa has scars jutting across his nose, too deep to be self-inflicted. “Um… yeah.” He clears his throat. “We call it a Mark of Duty.”

Isa does not seem offended, but whether that is out of authenticity or politeness, Terra can’t read him. 

“We’ve called it the Recusant’s Sigil,” Isa says slowly, eyes far away. “It bore us new names. Defined us so we refused to submit to our old identities, leaving us free to forge a united purpose.” He mimics the shape of the X with a finger across his chest. Cross my heart. “To the very end. That cross spelled an ending. We were all heretics to the person we once lived.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Terra whispers. The Master wore it proudly to the day of his own demise. 

Isa touches his face. “Xemnas marked me deeper than the others.”

“I’m so sorry.” Terra gasps. “I don’t… I don’t have memory of that.” 

“Ah.” A painted smile. If Isa hoped for some sort of validation or acknowledgment, Terra has failed spectacularly. “All the same, A Nobody’s path is a means to an end. We were all watched, weeded out for traitors.” Suddenly he does not look like Isa, but someone else with Isa’s face. “How Xemnas lacked the scope to understand us.”

“What do you mean?”

“We were perhaps experiments doomed to fail. The piece of Xehanort’s heart installed into us was supposed to swallow us whole. But the foundation of this concept was flawed. We kept memories of our human selves. That was supposed to make us superior to lesser Nobodies, but it was also our weak link. The goal was to keep us numb to them, so when we inevitably remembered, we’d have little care and wouldn’t dare stray from our duties.

“For me, the more I remembered the images, the more I remembered what I had sought out to do in my life.” Isa nods to himself. “Being a Nobody was supposed to give me strength to follow through, but it felt like shrinking. Until there came a point where I grew back. By then, I couldn’t fit myself anymore.”

“What were you trying to do before you became a Nobody?”

Isa passes him that knowing smile, a secret. “Finding a proper ending to my own story.” He exhales, content. “Do you have any memory from being Xemnas at all?”

“None.”

“What about from Xehanort?”

“No.”

Isa frowns. “Nothing in these past twelve years? Where were you?”

Thickness clogs Terra’s throat like a cork, painful to take down. He shrunk for twelve years, too, shoved into a corner of a room with no walls, black on black on black, as if light never existed. He’d move as if he had arms when he had none, flail and try to wake himself up when he had none. He wasn’t anyone or anything but a name. 

He shouldn’t have lived for twelve years. But he did. He lived when he knew Eraqus was near, never seen except once (a bushy smile hidden under the mustache), never heard, never touched. When Terra tried to speak, tried to listen, tried to move and ask for help, he couldn’t. He just knew Eraqus was there to give him hope that the nightmare would stop. Thus he lived. 

The part with Eraqus, Terra keeps to himself. 

“I was Nowhere.”

“I can’t begin to comprehend what that is supposed to be like.”

“A loop,” Terra briskly answers, leaning onto the palm tree and breathing in the parched aroma of bark. The air is crisp with salt and it’s fanning out the heat of the sun from earlier that day. There is laughter and the relaxing crunch of waves and a humid layer on his skin—everything he couldn’t get in Nowhere. “I played the same memory of my nineteenth birthday for one hundred times. I don’t know why I chose that memory so much, I guess I thought that was as good as it was going to get. The same conversations, the same jokes, over and over again. I made sure to get everyone’s voices right so I wouldn’t forget. 

“But after the fiftieth time, I’d beg Aqua to say something different, but she never did. I’d try to ask Ven a new question but it never escaped my mouth. I could only act the part I was supposed to. Over and over again. When I was tired of it, I went back to Nowhere and waited. 

“I only kept going because… I think I wanted to live. On a loop. I wanted to, then I didn’t. Then I did.

“You never know what kind of thoughts will hit you when you think you’ve decided to let go. At random times, it—” He sounds like a stranger to himself. “I convinced myself that this will never end. That I’ll be punished forever. I needed to burn out once and for all. 

“And when I’d get to that point, I’d realize some things. I’d realize that I never made things right with my friends, so I told myself that I had to get through this, and get myself out.

“Then I remember I’ll never be free. I’m so tired. But I’ve never had my first kiss, so I have to get out of this if I’m ever going to experience it.

“Then you decide to play your most humiliating memory to find out exactly what you did wrong, when you’ve made your best friend cry. It makes you want to forget everything and rest. But—and this is going to sound weird—I’ve never ordered food at a restaurant before. So, if I ever will, I must get out of this.”

[tuanhood]

delta

pairing: professional frat!jackson wang x reader

genre: lot of fluff, pining from afar, professional frat

warnings: none

word count: 3,700+

summary: when you joined your school’s co-ed professional frat all you had wanted was to get valuable business connections and resources that could help you in your future career. you really didn’t think you would end up with a huge fat crush on mr. popular. 

a/n: soooo this one is a little different because I know everyone always writes fics about jackson being the guy who throws the party or the kinda party boy type so I wanted to do something less expected and lil more soft. also this is unedited and lowkey a mess but :) yeehaw a post.

lambda | alpha | gamma | kappa | theta | sigma

You weren’t sure whether to scream or cry.

All you knew was that you wanted Jackson Wang. Badly.

Most of the girls that tended to crowd around him simply fell at his feet for his ridiculously good looks – which you had to agree was true – but you wanted more than just that. You wanted everything that Jackson was and is. His looks, his sense of humor, his kindness and his brain. You had been addicted to him since you joined Delta Sigma Pi at the beginning of the school year and you had to do something before you overdosed.

It hadn’t been your intentions to fall so head over heels for someone who you had mostly admired from afar and talked to in passing, but you really couldn’t help it. You had become a part of Delta Sigma Pi only for the possible connections it could bring you in your future. If you had wanted to join something more social you would have rushed a sorority like some of the girls in your dorm Freshman year. 

In fact, you were pretty against everything the Greek system stood for and advertised, but when you had heard of co-ed professional fraternities that aimed to help students make connections in their chosen profession and encourage advancement, you changed your mind. Instead of an organization that prided itself on binge drinking and toxic behavior, you joined Deltasig – a business fraternity for male and female students that centered on “professional” activities and fundamentals.

Of course, there were still “social” gatherings amongst the conferences, workshops and service activities that filled most of the members’ schedules. The social events were never really your thing – you’d much rather focus on advancing your future then drunk on a dance floor and squished in between two of the brothers you took a startup workshop with. You started to avoid and skip that aspect of Deltasig until you had taken notice of Jackson.

To be completely honest you had noticed Jackson long before you started getting little butterflies in your stomach every time you were in a room with him, but it wasn’t until two months into the school year that things changed.

You had shown up rather early to one of the weekly meetings – finishing class an hour before and not wanting to go all the way back home, then back up to campus. You had settled down at one of the tables and decided to take out your sketchbook to kill some time, not expecting anyone else to show up until at most thirty minutes before the meeting start time. With your hectic schedule this year and a heavy class load, it wasn’t often anymore that you could find time to work on your clothing sketches. It was your dream to have your own fashion label and company – an avenue where you could be creative through designing and also be a ball busting career woman with her own business to run. You hoped joining Deltasig would help you there.

It wasn’t until you had finished the shading of a winter coat that you realized you weren’t alone.

“Nice design.”

The deep voice had startled you – so much so that your pencil had fallen from your grasp and made its way to nearly the other side of the room. “Shit. Sorry about that,” you looked up from the table to be met with probably the brownest eyes you had ever seen. Your minimal encounters with Jackson before hadn’t prepared you for this up-close moment where all you could focus on was every little detail on his perfect face, “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Immediately, you positioned your eyes down and back to the sketchbook not wanting to creep him out at how much you apparently now loved staring at him.

“Totally fine,” you mumbled, still not daring to look back at him. You had heard so many girl – not just in Deltasig but all over campus talking about how mesmerizing Jackson Wang was. Legend has it that once you make direct eye contact with him, you’re placed under an unbreakable spell and become his forever. That kind of talk had always made you laugh. How could a human being – just a person has the capabilities to make another human being feel that way? Maybe it was because you had never been into the social partying thing or really ever had time to date due to your focus on designing clothes, but you couldn’t understand it. That was until that day.

More silence had settled between you and Jackson. You figured that by the way you were reacting, he probably thought you were rude. Somehow in your mind you had comprehended that maybe Jackson hating your guys would actually help you. If he didn’t like you then he would ultimately spend less time around you, therefore you would no longer have to feel whatever it was you were feeling as a result to being around him for less than two minutes.

“Let me get your pencil for you,” it was like you couldn’t make use of your body properly. As soon as he said it, you found your head whipping up to look at him go to the spot where your long-forgotten drawing utensil had landed. Your brain had repeatedly said “no look away” as Jackson leaned down to grab it, but your head remained stagnant in its place, eyes fixated on his back and the way his shoulder muscles moved.

Luckily you found yourself snapping out of the Wang induced trance as he stood up and turned back to return the pencil. To you it felt like you were being obvious and acting like a complete lunatic, but to sweet clueless Jackson he thought nothing strange of it.

“Here ya go. Sorry again,” Jackson smiled as he placed the pencil down on the table near the sketchbook, “you’re really good by the way. Is fashion design the reason why you joined?”

As much as you had wanted to respond to him, your mouth felt dry and your stomach churned in anxiety, afraid of saying the wrong thing. Instead, you nodded in response and despite your clear hesitations in conversing with him, Jackson smiled once again, “well that’s awesome. We’re really happy to have you in the frat Y/N.”

That was the last thing he had said to you before heading to his seat to also wait for other members to show up and start the meeting. The fact that Jackson Wang had knew your name made you want to blush and hide under a rock all in the same moment.

Ever since then you tried to push down your feelings for Jackson. You had heard crazy things about him – that he was very much into the small “social” part of Deltasig and even partook in a partying life outside of the org. That life wasn’t necessarily for you and that gave you more reasons to shove your daily fantasies of you and Jackson married with two children and successful companies out of your mind.

Despite all that talk of the kind of life Jackson led, you couldn’t ignore the way he acted at meetings and frat events. The way he would always encourage whoever had the floor to share an idea or concern, the way he would make sure to laugh twice as hard at someone’s joke if no one thought it was funny and especially the way he carried himself during workshops. He went from kind and alluring goofball to professional businessman. You loved a man with duality.

Then you started going to the Deltasig mixers and no longer could you ignore your feelings. It was all downhill from there.

They weren’t the average frat party where hundreds of people would show up and overall chaos would occur. Instead, the parties were more on the scale of just friends getting together to have a good time. Discovering that notion made you feel more open and comfortable in this kind of setting and you told yourself that was the reason you started going. Not because Jackson would always be in attendance.

You tried to be the average partygoer, but every time you would find your eyes drifting over to Jackson who was always in the middle of telling a story, dramatically using his arms to emphasize certain points. The smile he would get on his face when the person he was talking to would nod and laugh along made you feel even more sucked in. You weren’t even apart of the conversation but you felt Jackson’s charisma and just overall goodness in every part of you.

Then at a certain point during the party – every single time – you swear you could sense Jackson looking at you. You never look to see if you’re right and you’re unsure of what scares you more – being wrong or being right.

And now as you stood here, at probably the seventh Deltasig social you had been to, you once again watched the countless other girls in your frat fawn over Jackson. The girls obsessing over him and trying to get his attention wasn’t a new thing, after all this was the seventh time you were experiencing it. Only this time it was getting to you a lot more than before.

It was mostly being caused from the fifth – or was it the sixth? – “special” mixed drink Mark had made you in the kitchen.

“I don’t know I just throw in whatever sounds like it would be good,” he had said.

That had been good enough for you.

“Let me know if you decide to go for the MBA, my dad’s on the board of admissions at Northwestern and could totally help. Anything for that extra edge, right?”

It’s difficult to ignore how loud Hana is trying to sell her connections to Jackson. As if that’s what’s going to make him interested in her. Why would you want to be with a guy if all he liked about you was the fact your dad could write him a cushy letter of recommendation? She’s not the first however, and she’s certainly not the last.

Jackson smiled at her and you can’t help but smile in return from across the backyard. You’ve identified practically every different type of Jackson Wang smile and based off the way his mouth stretches across his face along with his eyes fixated downwards, it’s the “I’m smiling just to be nice” smile. It makes you satisfied.

“I’m good for now, but I’ll definitely let you know if anything changes. Thanks Hana, you’ve always been so helpful.” It amazed you how he could be so genuine with everyone about nearly everything. It certainly didn’t fit the picture of the Jackson who apparently always parties. But what did you know?

Hana smiled once more at Jackson before she cut her losses and headed back into house. You waited to see who the next contestant would be to try their tricks on Jackson. You watched and watched, looking at Jackson and surveying his every move. It wasn’t long before you realized that you had been staring at Jackson for an unfathomable amount of time – a clear sign that the alcohol had hit you. You didn’t drink ever and it felt like the effects of Mark’s special mixed drinks had come all at once.

“Y/N are you okay?”

It felt like you were getting lost in trance after trance, as though you couldn’t focus on one thing entirely. Your thoughts were so scattered you didn’t even notice Jackson’s approach.

“Y/N?”

Since you had started coming to the Deltasig socials you had never directly spoken to Jackson. Sure, during meetings and workshops there would be a word or two that would be exchanged between the two of you, but never a real conversation. Those were also under more professional circumstances and even though this was still a “professional frat” event, it didn’t have the same implications.

Blinking, you snapped out of your daze and looked at Jackson on your side, “y-yeah. I’m fine… just- why does it seem like I’m not okay?” Rather than the teasing tone you wanted to convey; you came off as genuinely concerned for yourself. Which was… good?

He sipped from the red cup he was holding and you feel yourself lose focus once again – this time on his pink heart shaped lips. “You were just kind of staring at me… for like a long time.”

Sober you would be embarrassed, but drunk you smiled at his words. Despite staring – something that was weird – Jackson still made you feel comfortable, like it wasn’t a strange thing to do.

“Oh yeah sorry. I was just enjoying the view,” you almost want to bite your tongue at how candid you are, but you figured that the Jackson that everyone knows and loves would just smile and shrug it off like he always does.

Instead you ended up being surprised, “oh really… and what view is that?”

You swear that the alcohol is playing with your mind, because even if Jackson is saying that to you, then it certainly can’t be in the tone that you think it is. It was hard to distinguish what was real and what was in your head.

“Just you,” drunk you is very surprising, but you kind of liked her.

You tried to read Jackson’s face, but for once you couldn’t. Instead of one of the smiles you had memorized and etched into your brain, you were taken aback to be met with Jackson’s blank face. For someone who was always smiling, it made you feel like you had whiplash at his out of character demeanor. “Y/N… I think you’re drunk.”

You were drunk? Okay yes… maybe you were, but after spending the party staring at Jackson and all of these months watching is every move it was clear that you were drunk on more than just alcohol. You’ve been drunk for months and right now was the tipping point.

“No. YOU’RE drunk.” You couldn’t believe that out of all the things you could say in response, you had chosen the one where you accuse him of being drunk. Jackson furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and looked down at the cup in his hand, “that would be impossible considering the fact that I don’t drink.”

Now you were the one left confused. After all the things you had heard surrounding Jackson, him not drinking didn’t really match with that, “are you sure?”

A smile stretched across his face and he lets out a little laugh. Your heart warms when you realized it’s one of his better smiles – his “that’s so funny, please tell me more” smile. If you had to spend the rest of your life seeing that smile, you’d never have a reason to be upset ever again.

“I’m sure I don’t drink alcohol.”

Your eyes widened at his reveal, “what? You don’t drink? The Jackson Wang? Party animal?”

It’s then you notice that most everyone else has left the backyard to go inside. The table that had once been full of drinks and surrounded by groups of people was suddenly cleared and deserted. You could still make out a hum coming from inside the house where people were still continuing the kickback, but from the empty backyard you suddenly felt so removed from it all.

Jackson takes a step closer to you, and frowns. At this point your mind is too hazy to analyze what kind of frown it is. Whether it’s a genuine frown or one of Jackson’s pouty frowns he wears when he gets teased by his friends, “Party animal? Where’s that coming from?”

You shrugged, “it’s just what I’ve heard… ya know through the grapevine.”

“Well I’m definitely not a party animal, so let’s clear that up now.”

“I just thought since everyone always-” you began, but he abruptly cut you off seeming a bit annoyed – something you hadn’t seen from him before, “Well not everyone knows what I’m actually like. They just make assumptions, I guess… I didn’t think you were like that though.”

The way he says the last part isn’t out of anger or annoyance, instead he sounds disappointed which makes you feel even worse. You grow quiet, your head beginning to hurt – unsure if it’s from Jackson’s reaction or the alcohol, you crouch down to the ground and place your head in your hands.

Jackson crouches down beside you out of concern and you’re barely able to make out his question of whether you’re okay or not. All you hear is an annoying ringing sound and Jackson and the yard in front of you begins to spin.

“I’m never drinking again,” you mumbled mostly to yourself, but you hear Jackson chuckle.

You feel yourself freeze and the ringing go away when Jackson reaches forward to tuck a strand of hair behind your hair, “you probably shouldn’t have had any of Mark’s drinks. They’re known to be lethal.”

“How did you know I had Mark’s drinks?”

This time it’s Jackson’s turn to freeze, his cheeks heating up, “just… took notice I guess.”

Jackson Wang had noticed you? You knew that he was attentive, the caring kind of guy who always looked after his friends, but this was different. It made the world stop spinning and your headache magically disappear as if you had been granted some sort of clarity.

You felt words on the tip of your tongue that could embarrass yourself further in front of Jackson. So much so that it could drive you to drop out of Deltasig and kiss your hopes and dreams of making connections in the business world goodbye. But the haze of the alcohol and Jackson’s big brown eyes right in front of you provoked you to let the words out.

“I always notice you Jackson.”

As soon as the words are out in the open, you look down at the ground not wanting to meet Jackson’s gaze, just as you had the day, he caught you drawing in your sketchbook. The silence that looms between the two of you feels heavy as it’s not often that Jackson’s left speechless. Even in awkward situations he always has something to say or a way to break the tension. You had seen it countless times before with all of the groupies in the frat that hang around him, so why now did he have nothing left to say?

You cleared your throat, “anyways… maybe I should get going since I’m drunk and all…” Despite your words you made no effort to get up off the ground, instead you felt yourself nervously tug at the grass around your feet still waiting for a word from Jackson.

Finally, after what felt like forever you felt like you could breathe.

“Is it the same way that I notice you?”

You know what he means, you know exactly what he means and it makes your heart stop. Your fingers leave the newest tuft of grass that you’ve pulled out of the ground and look back to Jackson. You’ve never seen him look so small and shy before; the alcohol makes you want to wrap your arms around him. Nodding at his question, you see a smile appear on his face. A smile that you haven’t seen before, one that you haven’t memorized and analyzed.

He licks his lips, “Y/N… I’ve never really been interested in parties or these stupid socials… I only really started going because I thought you would be there. I wanted to come up to you so many times, but… I just chickened out. I know we don’t know each other that well, but ever since you joined Deltasig I can’t get you out of my head. I only joined the frat to keep in mind what’s really important to me – my future – and I never thought much about making friends or,” he paused, “dating… It just wasn’t on my mind. But then I met you and I don’t know what it is… whenever I’m in a room with you I can’t stop looking at you. Ugh, that probably sounds psychotic, doesn’t it?”

You’re hanging on every word of his confession and soon find yourself laughing when he reaches the end. This entire time you had thought Jackson was this super cool, unattainable guy who paid you no mind. That he was the kind of person who was nice to everyone and had an aura to him that caused him to be labeled as one of the members of Deltasig that loved to party. But that was all wrong… Apparently, he was just like you.

“Are you laughing because you find me creepy or is it because of the alcohol?”

When you finally catch your breath, you fan yourself feeling hot from your intoxicated state and the laughter that had consumed you, “actually neither. I’m laughing because I’ve felt the exact same way.”

His face lights up and you once again catch a glimpse of that new smile. It makes you position yourself closer to him, leaning in until you can feel his breath and he can hear your heartbeat.

Just as you lick your lips and are about to close your eyes, you feel him move his hand forward to brush your hair out of your face for the second time of the night. Jackson looks at you with such a fondness that he almost convinces you that you’re a fragile doll that needs to be protected.

“I really really want to kiss you… but not while you’re drunk.” His words make sense, but they cause you to pout. You wanted his lips on yours as soon as humanly possible.

Jackson looks at you shyly once again, “can I walk you home instead?”

You felt like this was the beginning of something, the beginning of something so big and so important that never seemed fathomable before. All you had really wanted was for Jackson to look at you the same way you looked at him. It was a simple request that you never thought would be fulfilled, but with your new favorite smile etched on Jackson’s face, you felt a new kind of electricity run through your body.

“I would love that.”

[flooffybits]

To Risk It All

Idol: Kim Taeyeon (Girls’ Generation)

Request: Yes

Anon: hi! you're one of my fave writers & i want to say that im absolutely in love w/ your works! can i request a taeyeon scenario wherein she tries her best not to let the public know abt their relationship because she doesn't want ppl hating on s/o that they can't even enjoy a simple date outside? s/o was fed w/ it so they got into an argument? tae eventually apologized & took it upon herself to reveal their relationship to the public? im sorry if this is very detailed btw :( i hope it's okay!

Author's note: theres no need to apologize! detail is actually really nice because it makes writing the story better

Years of being under the spotlight has given the idol a lot to learn. After being harassed from dating a junior, being bashed for a member being kicked out of their group, and losing a friend where she was forced to hide her own depression, she’s learned how privacy would always be intruded by many.

At first, she didn’t want to think too much into the relationship she had with you. You were someone she met at some cafe, as cliche as it sounded. She accidentally poured her drink all over your shirt and she ended up apologizing profusely and insisting to buy you a new shirt.

She found comfort in you for the little time you spoke when picking out a shirt. You knew who she was, yet you treated her like a regular person, something she’s been wishing for in a long while. When she realized that you were someone she could talk to, she asked for your number and if it was okay to meet again without the accident, and you happily agreed.

When she started to fall for you, her fear started coming back, too.

She had to be professional about it, but she also didn’t want to lose you. So she kept those feelings down and tried to be as normal as possible around you, though she couldn’t help it when butterflies would swarm inside her stomach whenever she saw you and how the world seemed brighter when you smiled or laughed

It put her at ease.

So one night, she thought that maybe it would be okay to just be herself around you and her feelings poured out of her like a waterfall. It would have been alright if you rejected her, that would have been much easier. But instead, you initiated the kiss right after she told you and all things came flying out the window.

You weren’t too bothered with having to keep the relationship a secret and she appreciated that. She could just enjoy her time with you in private.

But not all things last forever since two years after, Dispatch decided to come and ruin her life once more. There have been some pictures of the two of you, but your faces were always covered due to Taeyeon’s request. It kept you protected and even if people noticed her, they wouldn’t know who was with her.

“I know, Tae. I just wished we could do something else.” You sighed while you sat on the couch, fingers running through your hair whilst she crossed her arms, lips pursed together. “We can but... just not now. It’s too risky.” She says and you know because you’ve already heard this before.

The conversation has been reoccurring, much more now with Dispatch keeping a close eye on her.

It irritated you.

Yes, you knew that this was going to happen when you first started seeing each other. But you didn’t think that you would nearly be on house arrest just for it. It felt suffocating and restraining and it wasn’t healthy, to either of you.

“Then why don’t we just tell them. At least that way, we don’t have to keep hiding.” Her head whips to you, looking at you as if you had grown a second head. “Y/n, the reason I don’t want us going out is that they don’t find out.” She emphasizes and it doesn’t help your frustration.

“Then what are we supposed to do? Even coming here is risky for you because everyone knows you don’t live her. If people saw you, that’s it. And then what?” You finally snapped. “I can’t go out to see you, we can’t be seen together, then what’s the point?” Your words made her heart rate rise. It was scaring her because it sounded like there was only one way out of this, if she chose not to come clean.

“I’ve told you, I’m doing this to protect you.” She breathes out and you stare at her with a frown, doing your best to stay calm with the situation you were both in. “I don’t need you to protect me, Tae. I am more than capable of handling myself.” You tell her, voice lower compared to your outburst earlier.

“I don’t want them to start sending you hate or threats. I don’t want them to suddenly walk up to you and potentially hurt you. You mean too much to me for that to happen and I can’t forgive myself if something bad happened to you because of me.” Tears were threatening to come from her eyes, but she didn’t want to let them out. “If you do, then you would have enough faith in me and our relationship than the fear of what everyone else will say or do.” You reason, standing up and then walking towards the bedroom.

Taeyeon was left in the living room, staring quietly at the spot you once occupied and let out a deep breath. She had to run her fingers through her hair, doing her best to brush her exhaustion and anxiety away. This was one of the things she wanted to avoid, yet here she was.

Looking at the bedroom, she chewed on her lower lip before she shook her head and walked inside. With a quick look at you, back to her with the blankets pulled up to your chin, she slipped in behind you, doing the same and curling up under the covers.

..

The next day was a little calmer compared to last night. When Taeyeon woke, she saw that you were already awake and had breakfast prepared, though after a little panic of waking up alone in bed.

Sometime during the night, you both ended up tangled together, bodies close, without realizing. And when you woke up, that was the same position you were in. It made your chest tighten because as much as you wanted to keep this relationship going, it was too tiring for both of you.

"Good morning." Her voice was gentle, careful as she entered the dining room and sat down while you offered her a small smile. "Good morning." You greeted back while taking a sip of your coffee.

There was a pause and you both have to admit that this was one of the most awkward breakfasts you've ever had. Neither of you could look each other in the eyes, and neither knew what to actually say. But thankfully, her phone rang and stole her attention away, and judging by the grimace on her face, you could only guess who it was and what it was about.

“Go ahead. I’m going to work, soon.” You tell her, picking at your food since you didn’t really have the appetite to eat anything and Taeyeon bit her lip. “Y/n, I’m really sorry about last night but I will fix this. I promise.” She tells you, reaching for your hand to give it a squeeze and you try not to sigh and give her a weak smile. “Okay.”

Taeyeon left your place with hesitance. She drove all the way to SM, thinking about what could possibly happen and what she could do. She didn’t want to keep hurting you like this, it was unfair. And then your words from last night echoed in her head when she got to the parking lot.

Staring at the wheel, her hands went loose before dropping to her lap. She had to take a minute and actually think of this whole thing. If she kept hiding you away, these fights would only keep on escalating and the risk of losing you was slowly rising, too. But if she did come forward and told everyone, the possibility of them hurting you scared her beyond belief, but you convinced her that you were capable of protecting yourself and she knew firsthand that you could.

It was just a battle between her own fears and she wasn’t sure which side she would be taking. Glancing at her phone, she sees the picture she took of you when you were sound asleep next to her.

Looking at it now, she knew that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with you. It was just something she hasn’t told you yet.

At that moment, she grabbed her things and finally exited her car to go and get this meeting over with, her head held high as she steeled her resolve. She wasn’t losing you. That, she was certain of.

..

Coming home after a tiring day, you kicked your shoes off before dragging your body over to the bedroom, dropping your keys on the counter as you passed, but your hand stopped mid air when you saw Taeyeon sitting on a chair, wringing her hands together. When she finally looked up to meet your gaze, she gave you a smile before standing up.

“You’re back.” She breathed out and you blinked in confusion, slowly putting your hands on the table while she bit her lip and then carefully handed her phone to you, an article pulled up that was dated today, published just a few hours ago. “What’s this?” You ask hesitantly and she just gives you a pleading look.

You look down, immediately seeing the picture of your girlfriend but was quickly followed by the one you were both in and you already felt your breath hitch in. After a quick glance at her, you let yourself read the contents of the article, slowly feeling your muscles grow less tense when you saw that Taeyeon had confirmed the rumors of her seeing someone.

“You...” You choked out while putting her phone down and she let out a breath. “I thought about what you said and... you were right, that I shouldn’t let other people control how my life goes.” She looks at you, her eyes shining as she reaches for your hand like she did that morning.

Taeyeon has endured so much throughout her career, but all the hardship brought her to where she is now. It was what brought her to you and she believes that maybe this is what life planned out for her. With a steady gaze, she squeezes your hand. “I want to be with you. I want to live the rest of my life with you.”

Your eyes softened as you took in her form. Your girlfriend was truly an admirable person and you just wanted to take all that suffering away from her. But it also moved you how she was willing to tell people that she was dating again even after what happened before. But the last bit made you freeze while analyzing her features, trying to see a sense of doubt, but there was none.

She stared at you with nothing but certainty and love and it was enough for you as you pulled her into you and pressed a long kiss against her lips, one she happily accepted with her arms wrapping around your neck.

You would both be okay, even through the hate. She had always been afraid, but now she was more than willing to risk this career. Because unlike this, you gave her a sense of comfort and security.

She would be damned if she gave that happiness up.