#i dont wanna live without u even you hurted me like this

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 163 spoilers and thoughts that are making me procrastinate on like all of my work but its totally fine below the cut

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i am so serious i was completely tricked into thinking this would just be a light episode with some ominous foreshadowing but still some answers for how to defeat fate. i thought we'd be in silly haha territory now and that soon we'd reach the end and everything would be wonderful now and they can finally have what they want. I WAS PROVEN WRONG

YOU. YOU TRICKED ME FROM THE GETGO BY SETTING THE MOOD OF THE EP TO BE SILLY OFF THE BAT. YOUR STUPID CUTE HAIR BEING MESSY WHEN U WAKE UP AND THOSE SILLY ASS D*SNEY ANIMALS. YOU YOU YOU YOU RAPHAEL YOU FOOLED ME

it's super cute and funny that his singing and his general demeanor is so fairytale esque that animals and people just love him even though he tried to destroy what they were working on . he looks adorable with messy hair. i wanna see it more. cute and blond. but also. FUCK YOU

like we went from that to this and i was like "oh my god they're gonna have a bonding moment" and i was so so happy i just,, i really thought,,,,

like he looks so pretty here!! and then javier says something so sweet and so javier-brand of affectionate and they're being funny about it and it's so cute and they're all smiley afterward in the reflections of the water so its like "awww stupid fucking idiots being happy at each other without even really knowing it i love them so much" AND THEN.

STUPID FUCKING OMINOUS REFLECTION GOT ME ALL WORRIED. BUT THEN I THOUGHT OF RAPHIE AT THE START AND WENT "nahhh thats just. yknow. the normal foreshadowing at something bigger. they haven't even gotten answers yet. it's fine" oh lynn. oh girl you had no idea.

like they're so close to the truth cmon they wouldnt dump what they need to do to stop fate AND whats going on w javier at the same time right? ha. ha. ha.

ominous panels aside POOR LLOYD,,, OF ALL THE SECRETS HE COULD HAVE CHOSEN,,, he had no idea its not fair </3 we got blushy lloyd as a result i love this panel btw he's very very cute. super duper bug of him. i really like that the artist has been drawing the two of them at this angle a lot recently they look so stupid i like it a lot

ALSO JAVIER DO YOU. HAVE SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SAY. WHY DID HE ASK THAT I. JAVIER U CANT JUST ASK PEOPLE HOW DEE- WHAT THE FUCK

and then we got hit w javier being worried and i was like "man me too buddy, im worried too but im sure itll be oka-"

DEATH FLAG. WHY. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO THINK THAT LLOYD OH GOD. i read this and my worry that was briefly washed away IMMEDIATELY came back . tged is very good at giving me tonal whiplash. i dont think thats a bad thing but also its not good for my health either so. /lh

AND THEN WE GOT HIT WITH THE JEWEL OF TRUTH SECTION AND. AAAAHHH AAAAAAAAHHH the darkness that lloyd is in, he's all alone when he hears this god i . oh god i have so much to say okay

it's kind of hard to go shot by shot with this section because all my thoughts are overlapping with each other but ill try my best???

he's immediately pushed into communication between just him and the jewel and shrouded in a very very isolating darkness. there's so so so much empty space and all my yapping about how much lloyd has been isolating himself for the sake of finally protecting his loved ones kind of comes to a head here. and then we hear the truth...

lloyd is a BUG. the fact that he EXISTS is a problem that has been the catalyst of all the pain and work that he and javier have had to go through, so so early in the story. he's essentially being told that its HIS fault fate is threatening their lives. AND WOW THAT HURTS. how do you cope with being told that?? how do you manage that???

and on TOP of it all, in order to fix it, he has to choose. rid the world of this bug, or let the bug take over. THAT'S SO EVIL

the only way to protect his loved ones is to forfeit his protection over them, giving up his life. and yet the only way for him to continue being there to protect them is to lose the life of the one he absolutely loves most, javier. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT

the moment he hears this he falls to his knees. im so fucking ill IM SICK . THIS IS SICK AND TWISTED!!!!!!!!!!!

some more thoughts on the language and just. inherent despair of this section:

i think the choice of calling lloyd a bug is so so so heartwrenching. i don't know if it's an intentional thing by the writer/adapter or if it's just something they defaulted to since the world is considered a system, but either way it makes me so damn emotional

i'm a computer engineer, so i take some computer science classes too as part of my major, and one of those fun facts that you learn in those classes is that debugging/bugs became common terminology in compsci for a very silly reason. "bugs" as a word to describe error and defects had been present before, but it became conflated with programming due to a team of programmers actually finding a moth, a true to life Bug, interfering with their computer and thus messing with their program.

see, the JoT could have called lloyd anything. an error, a mistake, a problem, hell even a glitch would have worked. but they specifically said bug (and again whether or not thats intentional is up for debate but i will treat it like it is)

and the thing about bugs, the thing that haunts me now, is that without them the rest of the program (theoretically) works fine. if that moth hadnt entered the computer of those programmers, then their code would have been operating smoothly. the system would be chugging along well.

the knight of blood and iron would be functioning just fine.

yeah it'd be sad, yeah javier would have lost everyone, but it would have gone exactly as the program was written. the memory allocated for the class lloyd_frontera would be freed, and the story wouldn't have had to call on it, ever. but lloyd, the bug, the moth, stuck around. errors ensue.

and often, bugs are HUMAN error. it's a problem in a human design, not a natural glitch or mistake. the moth wouldn't have been able to enter that computer if it was built differently. bugs do not appear naturally. and they do not go away until you go back to where the bug appears and FIX IT. lloyd cannot fix the story, he can NEVER achieve the happy ending he's always wanted, because the program will always be bugged because of HIM.

suddenly too, all the little changes that have happened in the story thus far make so much sense. all of those events happening EARLIER than they should have completely tracks.

the choices lloyd made - to defeat neumann, defeat lacona, go to cremo, go to the capital - pushed javier's presence ahead, and i know that's like really really obvious, but coupled with this bug analogy i feel insane because

something that's very common in programming in general are function calls, where on the side you have the function written out all complete, and in your main code you can just say the name of the function. when it compiles, itll know what to refer to when it sees the name in your main code.

something else thats very common is conditionals! y'know, your classic "if (comparison here) then do (this thing here) else (do this thing here)", you might have seen this before (or not, im not sure how well versed tged tumblr is on programming which is why im explaining this)

and u think back to javier being there EARLY and oh. ooohh....

if (javier.location == magentano.event_location(banquet)) {

kyle_betrayal(alicia);

}

this function, this betrayal, was called early. THIS WAS CALLED EARLY because a certain character object, lloyd frontera, changed the state of javier's location way sooner than it should have happened. a bug. a bug. a bug. a bug made the code jump to this conditional. he's been a bug this whole time

and you think to when the glitches on javier first started appearing and oh. oooohhh. the object referred to as javier, disabled the "protagonist" variable on him and passed it onto lloyd. but that won't do, because all these functions for the ENTIRE STORY rely on javier's class object. how can it call on lloyd instead? lloyd should have been freed, aka the memory storing his little array of data, should have been REMOVED. CAUSE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE

theres more examples of this throughout the whole story that maybe ill list another day (as much as im yapping about it, its really not that hard/deep on figuring out where things were called early lol) but yeah yeah yeah. yeah this is so so evil and i cant believe i didnt put two and two together earlier. this analogy is SO EVIL WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS TO ME

apologies for the jargon btw. i have no idea if i explained this right or if anyone else really knows what im talking about but i've been losing it over this for the entire weekend ALKDFJLSDKF

WHATS WORSE IS THAT IVE BEEN CALLING LLOYD A BUG FOR LIKE. ACTUAL MONTHS. I WOULD REFER TO HIM AS A CREATURE AND AS A LITTLE ITTY BITTY BUG AND NOW I FEEL SO SO TERRIBLE BECAUSE HE REALLY WAS A BUG. I MADE A SHITPOST AND EVERYTHING (that ill prolly post later) THAT I HAD NO IDEA WOULD. AGE POORLY SOB SOB SOB

I AM SO SO SORRY LLOYD. I DIDN'T KNOW I DIDN'T KNOW I DIDN'T KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sniffle,,, sob,,, anyway,,, thats enough yapping about bugs and programming and lloyd being a bug,,, back to the anguish

the following section is just. god ow ow OW. the shaking linework, the shadows setting in at the top with the dramatic bottom lighting, and the blur on javier as he loses focus and starts truly, truly panicking makes me INSANE. artist you're making me CRAZY!!!

javier truly has no idea either but god dammit he's trying his best to help, but how can lloyd explain this to the man whos completely and utterly loyal to him to the point of sincere devotion? if lloyd tells him, whos to say that javier - the martyr that he is - won't just give up his life for him? god that's so... GOD. GOD GOD GOD WHY AGHHH

AND AGGHHH AGGGHHHH THE FLASHBACKS TO THE P PANELS OF SUHO WORKING SO SO HARD TO REACH THE LIGHT. GOD FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK

ITS DIMMER ITS HARDER TO REACH AND OH MY GOD THE PANEL OF LLOYD REACHING UP EVEN IN HIS PANIC TOWARDS HOPE. THE THOUGHT THAT "ITLL GET BETTER ONE DAY" COMFORTED HIM AND KEPT HIM ALIVE BUT NOW ITS BEING RIPPED FROM HIM I FEEL ILL. EVIL EVIL EVIL EVIL

this panel of that light going out . not much words on this i just feel sick to my stomach. why would u do that.

and finally at the end of the chapter we have this incredibly HAUNTING panel of lloyd panicking. the despair here is UNREAL. the lineart is shaken and messy and scribbly, and the focus on his face and his hand gives the panel a very claustrophobic and hard-to-breathe feel and it makes mE SICK!!! IT MAKES ME SICK!!! SICK AND TWISTED!!!! JEWEL OF TRUTH I HATE YOU!!!!!!!

anyway that's all my thoughts for right now . i really really hope they figure out a loophole or something . if they dont im actually gonna keel over and die /j not literally but yknow what i mean

SICK AND TWISTED!!! is my final word on this ep

thanks for joining me in hell ill see yall next week salute emoji

[writingstoraes]

paddock greetings 💌

pairing: charles leclerc/fem!reader

type: instagram imagine/social media au

notes: not proofread and not revised so please expect errors hehehe please lmk what u think by replying or messaging and if u wanna be part of my taglist! <3 this is a bit long! hehe

about: for your 5th anniversary and engagement, the drivers send their greetings with a bit of banter in the comments as always.

lewishamilton

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, arthurleclerc, and 1,560,431 others

lewishamilton Greeting this two a happy 5-year anniversary and wishing them the best as they take another massive and wonderful step in their life! Best wishes to the best couple I know ❤️

charles_leclerc Thank you, mate! Also huge thanks for setting me up with her, wouldn't be here without you 😅

lewishamilton Well you wouldn't stop asking about her so I gave in 🤷‍♂️

charlesrari LMAOOO SIR LEWIS AIRING OUT CHARLES' BUSINESS LIKE THAT

yourusername thank you, lew! wow imagine if i never went on that blind date...

pierregasly I think you would have found someone better

charles_leclerc You have one minute before I pay a visit to your room.

pierregasly

liked by carlossainz55, lilymhe, yourusername, and 506,771 others

pierregasly Congratulations on the engagement of the two craziest people I know 🥂 Pls stop asking me to take cheesy pictures of you guys sometimes what you do in front of me is unacceptable. I still remember being behind the camera when I took you guys' infamous yacht shots 😮‍💨

yourusername not you saying we're improper im literally the third wheel when you and charles are together???

pierregasly Y/N you took Charles away from me can you blame me

charles_leclerc Pierre what

pierregasly Are you choosing your wife over me? Wow okay that hurts mate

danielricciardo

liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername, arthurleclerc, and 905,660 others

danielricciardo Some outtakes from my camera of Y/N and Charles. This was the first time Charles took Y/N on a trip with us and they honestly just bring out the best in each other. No better day to post this than now. Congratulations on the engagement, you two! 🎉 Wishing you live a life filled with love and happiness.

yourusername DANIEL WTH this is so pretty :(( these pictures are a blessing, thank you danny 🤍

charles_leclerc Thank you, Daniel! And thank you for my new wallpaper hahaha

carlossainz55 You're replacing me already?

charles_leclerc Mate you were never my wallpaper

pierregasly Don't even bother Carlos he's a married man now

yourusername what i have to deal with every day...

landonorris

liked by yourusername, maxverstappen, charles_leclerc, and 432,679 others

landonorris Congratulations on the engagement Y/N and Charles! I want to let you know that I am utterly disgusted by the two of you please stop flirting in front of me ❤️

yourusername you greeted us but at what cost

charles_leclerc ... Thanks???

ferrarifan3 Lando greeting like a true friend we love to see it

charloslove LMAO I KNEW LANDO WOULD HAVE THE FUNNIEST GREETING

carlossainz55

liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername, isahernaez, and 860,560 others

carlossainz55 Love you both to bits but honestly third-wheeling with you guys has got to be one of the worst experiences ever. "It'll be fun, Carlos," but then they'd leave me in the middle of the road - this happened in Madrid by the way and I will never live it down. Happy engagement, Charles and Y/N 😁

charles_leclerc Carlos we did not leave you we just bought food

carlossainz55 You were gone for 30 minutes?

charles_leclerc The taco line was long you said you wanted tacos!

myferrarimen this banter is what i live for honestly

yourusername why were u in the middle of the road anyway

carlossainz55 I dont remember 🤷‍♂️

charles16 how carlos doesnt get lost on a daily basis is a mystery to me

pierregasly Lmaooo they left you

yukibabie "I will never live it down" king of grudges

---------

tagging: @slytherheign <33 hope ur video recording for class went well mwah

notes: thought this was a rlly cute idea and my classes start on monday so its a bummer :// my masterlist is up and running so u can navigate thru my works on my pinned post! lmk what u guys think <33

[foundfam2754]

S17e5 live reactions!

Spoilers…obviously

- yeah Elias don’t murder anyone if you wanna be an informant

- lol he has a whole receiving parade

- oh my fucking god Elias is messing w our papa pasta :(

- oh I just realised it has been ages since he’s actually spoken to him not in his mind - you got this bud ❤️

- car sex is just not it man

- OH DEBBY RYAN LOOKALIKE AND DAMIAN I see

- the girl reminds me of cat adams - revenge murder and maybe the most brutal bc of so much hurt in the past - in fact this whole thing gives me dirty dozen vibes

- “you’ve been taking to to yourself” “I’ve been talking to myself for years” idk why that made me laugh hard

- AM I ONLY THE ONE WHO SEES THE SPENCER REID PLAQUE COMING UP A LOT??? Pls let mgg come back oh my god

- hehe garvez is standing together 🥰

- protective luke 🥹

- “no!” “Everyone’s a comedian” HAHAHA

-“hands-off asshole” yeah give me more protective lukey pleaseeeee; also gives vibes of ‘don’t touch my girls stuff asshole’ which I LOVE

- “what’s up with you two…cause there’s a vibe” OH MY FUCKING GOD PENELOPE EVEN SICARIUS SEES IT. OPEN YOUR EYES AND LET HIM LOVE YOU

- couples who bully sicarius about his hygiene together stay together 🥺 🤝

- I kinda love how they’re filming this - they’re profiling together in the bull pen and workshopping - Elias has a weird chemistry w them

- lol pen with the handkerchief

- DONT TOUCH HER

- this is too easy; I’m so suspicious: I feel like he’s gonna do the same with Bailey - say something code-wordy to hint to him

- also why does it feel like Elias is being too helpful? like I think maybe he’s so invested bc 1) he gets to mess with Dave by being part of his team 2) Damian is a loose end and has some evidence to tie him to sicarius offficially

- I TOLD U HE WAS GONNA CODE WORD IT. I KNEW THE TIPPY TAP MEANT SOMETHING

- I love smart strategic confident Em and she and Dave plotting to fuck Elias over together

- is he finally gonna shower??

- “dave” like they’re besties

- LOVE THIS SHOT

- EW THEY HAD VOIT SAY OUR PRECIOUS PHRASE - but okay no that was so impactful

- oh my god he’s fucking with them so hard oh my god

- JJ SAID FUCK!!

- OH MY GODDDDDDD they’re talking about jealous Luke they’re talking about Penelope and Tyler they’re SAYING IT OUTRIGHT I CANT TALK I CANT TYPE I AM SCREAMING I LITERALLY GOT OFF MY COUCH AND JUMPED ACROSS MY APT

- ew tynelope is so gross greencia is so much better

- Luke you didn’t say nooo?! we all know it drives you crazy agent alvez

- so chaotic Elias is so funny man; kudos to Zach Gilford

- PAPA PASTA PROTECTING HIS FAMILY. You mess with Pen, Rossi brings the heat

- isn’t “locking you in a shipping container” a confession?? why are they not more interested in that?

- oh my god Brian’s gaslighting her - falling into the conspiracy thing again - everyone’s vulnerable and only hearing what they want too

- haha lukey doing yoga

- oh my god how do they do anything without Penelope

- hey kiddos - voit is leaving?? Pls pay attention to him

- is Rossi gonna let him run??

- oh my god they’re profiling each other

- OH MY GOD DAMIAN. I KNEW ELIAS WAS GONNA CODE WORD IT.

- “Teresa is in trouble”!??

- TYLER I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU KEEP MORE SECRETS

- oh my god the sicarius smile

- aw tebecca!

- EM :(( be vulnerable babe we’re here for you

OH MY GOD THIS EP WAS SO GOOD

[cassedyevihtt]

Solitaire and Radiosilence

I have been listening to these audio books again. About how these characters pour their hearts out online. And how people go through trying times but have friends thats there for them.

Examples of this is Tori she suffers alot alone and has to be there for charlie "i am the one thats suppost to be there when these things happen"

She cant bear the thought of someone being concerned and caring for her. But at the end of the day she feels safe with a person and lets him in. This is extraordinary.

Another thing that are common in fiction in general is that these emotional issues get to a high point where shit has got to go down. Like there starts a fire at Tori's school that makes her properly freak out and thats how she and people around her find out abt exactly how depressed she's been feeling.

Or when Tori sees micheal lose that scating competition. And he rages.

That sort of thing never happens in real life. Most of us suffer in silence. And it never gets this high point. It might gradually go over or it stays for a loooong time.

And if it does get a high point, people are never there to see it. Not the people you care abt most anyway.

Cuz u shield the people u care abt. U dont want them to go around concerned.

I freak out over things. It can get hard for me to stand or breathe sometimes and i can get a bit manic. This is all in my head. I can get easily overwhelmed bc i naturally think alot. And notice alot of things. Especially when doing something new. And not fun. Like work. This is just a basic truth for me. Something i need to live with and be patient with.

And when i get like that, sometimes I just want a hug. And other times i want people to fuck off and I just need a break and a snack. And some sleep. And to make a list.

How nice would it be for someone to know and understand that? I dont want people to be like "oh no will she be alr doing these big things she wanna do in her life?" I dont want them to make me doupt myself. I want them to stand by, see me suffer and see me pull through anyway. Like the push and pull. Both "u got this come on one more step!!" And "now u just chill, tomorrow u work"

Radiosilence has a sequence where Francis goes and finds his sister, tracks her down, fools aled's toxic af mother and finds his sister. Aled's sister and Francis and Daniel and Rain all drive 6 hours in the middle of a schoolday to find Aled.

And i feel like this also only happens in fiction. People truly caring for one another and seeing when other people are hurting and DOING something abt it. Solitaire had it realistic "i saw it comming and yet I did nothing" both charlie and tori said this to one another.

I wish someone would do that for me if they knew i was not feeling well. And i wish people would do that without it needing to be "i think she might kill herself" it could just be "mate, i think she's having a stressy day, so lets bake something nice for her and do something fun together" I mean, it doesnt have to get so serious before friends just contact each other or appear without warning and just hang out or talk.

I think, the friends that i have now, i probably wouldnt have taken that roadtrip for them in the middle of my schoolday. I'd think for them to sort it out by themself. Now, with Aled, the character's got a houndred hints that he was not okay. But in real life u cant tell. People just go around lying and maybe stop texting if they even did much in the first place.

I knew one friend was hurting herself. So i asked abt it. This was before i grew up. She talked abt it and i said for her to talk to me abt it from that moment onward. I also showed concern for another friend who had 'issues at home' I said for her to meet me after school one day where she could let it all out, and I would listen. So i did.

Another friend had panic attacks and I tried to show that i was there for them aswell. I tried to ask how they were, if they were getting help (which they were)

But then i went through shit. And i didn't feel anyone was there. I later told a friend myself, but before that no one really noticed.

I am pretty sure my main friend group knew shit was bad for me at some point. I said i'd done something stupid and they'd all ask what and i couldnt tell them.

Now later we dont really talk. My friend that had panic attacks isnt on the same wavelength as me anymore. We dont have the same interests and they have this other friend that is better. And i pissed of their little sister.

Its just. I think I chose the wrong friends. Friends who just wants to use me and discard me when i have nothing more for them to use, when i don't want to listen to their sob stories anymore. There is no genuine "how are u though?" Bc they do ask just to be nice but in reality everyone knows that they wouldnt be able to take the answer. They wouldn't want to hear the real answer. They just want to feel guilty. They want reassurance. They dont want to be there.

I am ready to move away from this place. I want fresh air. New friends that will take initiative. That wont just wait for me to make a move. But actually come around to my house and check up on me, not bc i seem sad but bc thats just a nice thing to do.

That they will call me instead of me just calling them. (For example one friend I called alot but he never called first)

And this is not me wanting pity. I dont do pity. What i want is understanding. And to be seen. Like micheal and Tori. For someone to stop and invest in the energy to get to know me, slowly. Quality time. Pick up cues and pieces of who i am. Not just the rough tough exterior i have (which I love) but the person inside too.

Maybe I'd like it to be more than one person so that I dont enter some Co-dependant relationship/friendship again. Still a bit hard to trust myself or anyone else after something like that. It has always been hard for me to trust others though.

In reality the only one that can save u is urself. It would be nice to have team players though. Real and actual team players.

[captainbragd-personal]

Gor fired without a warning. Boss wasnt interested in making things work. Even when i brought up how I qualify for Wage Suport Aid from the goverment if it could mean they would keep me.

Really sad and hurt. I really loved the kids, and some of my coworkers were cool. But fuck my boss. Fuck the owners. Fuck it all.

At least they gave me 14 days paid that I dont have to be there for. So Im gonna use that to find somethi g else. But Fuck them to hell and hope all their nails grow in and they get yeast infections. Like wherever. Hope it hurts.

Consider commissioning me if u wanna help me out:

[evb0]

first starkid fic! pretty happy w it.

jason x richie (aka weeball), chatfic, slightly angsty, 1052 word

*10/21/21 , 4:07 pm*

*DMS with @jsnjepson and @weeaborichie*

jsnjepson: hi 

jsnjepson: did u get home safe?

weeaboorichie: I’m omw home right now

weeaboorichie: ╥﹏╥

jsnjepson: okay !!

jsnjepson: you have food yeah?

jsnjepson: for the plane tomorrow 

weeaboorichie: yeah

weeaboorichie: I have like everything 

weeaboorichie: I’m still so pissed abt it tbh (¬､¬)

weeaboorichie: god my eyes hurt

weeaboorichie: from crying o(TヘTo)

jsnjepson: I’m so sorry love

jsnjepson: it’s so unfair I’m sorry you have to go through this

jsnjepson: you wanna call?

weeaboorichie: that would be nice

weeaboorichie: I’m sorry about all of this

jsnjepson: it’s not your fault

jsnjepson: I’ll text you every day 

jsnjepson: I promise

*@jsnjepson started a call that lasted 4 hours, 21 minutes and 8 seconds.*

*10/22/21 , 10:35 AM”

*DMS with @jsnjepson and @weeaborichie*

jsnjepson: what are u doing rn? <3

weeaboorichie: we just got in the place

weeaboorichie: haven’t taken off yet 

weeaboorichie: when we do my wifi will probably get so shitty too

weeaboorichie: idk if I can talk to you then (ノ﹏ヽ)

jsnjepson: that’s fine, don’t worry about it please love

jsnjepson: how do you feel?

weeaboorichie: physically or mentally

weeaboorichie: physically fine , I took advil 

weeaboorichie: but mentally. god. so shit

weeaboorichie: jace I’m gonna miss you so so much

weeaboorichie: and pete 

weeaboorichie: and ruth 

weeaboorichie: I don’t wanna leave

weeaboorichie: I’ve never even met this woman

weeaboorichie: uncle paul hasn’t met her since he was like. a baby

weeaboorichie: I have no clue why we’re MOVING. to like buttfuck nowhere texas 

weeaboorichie: neither of us care abt her

weeaboorichie: but we gotta uproot our whole fucking lives to take care of her

weeaboorichie: I DONT KNOW WHY WE CAN’T MOVE BACK WHEN SHE KICKS THE BUCKET TOO

weeaboorichie: god I just. he won’t tell me much and

weeaboorichie: I love you guys too much to. never see you again

weeaboorichie: god I can’t think about that

jsnjepson: that’s so shitty

jsnjepson: I’m so sorry love 

jsnjepson: I love you so so so much okay prince?

weeaboorichie: I love you too

weeaboorichie: thank you

weeaboorichie: I love you

weeaboorichie: fuck fuck fuck we’re taking off

jsnjepson: have a good flight love

jsnjepson: text me when you land please?

weeaboorichie: will do

weeaboorichie: I love you

weeaboorichie: bye bye

jsnjepson: bye love <3

*11/02/21, 12:43 am*

*DMS with @IAMJAGERMAN-IAMGOD and @jsnjepson*

jsnjepson: dude I just fucking

jsnjepson: I miss him so god damn much

jsnjepson: I don’t want to get out of bed

jsnjepson: ever

jsnjepson: my eyes hurt from crying

IAMJAGERMAN-IAMGOD: you’re like 

IAMJAGERMAN-IAMGOD: so down bad man

IAMJAGERMAN-IAMGOD: you wanna

IAMJAGERMAN-IAMGOD: come over to my house or something 

IAMJAGERMAN-IAMGOD: later

jsnjepson: not really

jsnjepson: I don’t wanna do anything

jsnjepson: but thanks bro

jsnjepson: for asking 

*11/04/21, 3:14 pm*

*GROUPCHAT with @micropeter, @flemwad and @weeaboorichie* 

weeaboorichie: i want to go HOME

weeaboorichie: this SUCKS

weeaboorichie: I don’t know ANYONE HERE!!!

weeaboorichie: I still get bullied

weeaboorichie: I miss you guys so so much

weeaboorichie: I’d do anything for a movie night with you two

weeaboorichie: and Jason

weeaboorichie: oh god Jason

weeaboorichie: I miss him so so much

weeaboorichie: it like actually hurts

weeaboorichie: we text and call like every day but

weeaboorichie: it’s not the same

micropeter: Sorry Richie :(

micropeter: We miss you a lot here too.

micropeter: Study sessions are so so much more boring without you.

flemwad: YES THEY ARE

flemwad: godddd I’d even watch one of ur weird ass animes w you I miss you so much

flemwad: and not  for the sexy anime girls !!!

flemwad: not just for the sexy anime girls

weeaboorichie: thanks guys

weeaboorichie: I love you two

weeaboorichie: I’m gonna go eat dinner now

*11/07/21, 2:21 PM.*

*DMS with @jsnjepson and @weeaborichie*

jsnjepson: hi love!!

jsnjepson: how’s it going? everything sorta ok over there?

weeaboorichie: actually. pretty good! 

weeaboorichie: I met this kid at my new school

weeaboorichie: his name is Ethan

weeaboorichie: he’s so cool

weeaboorichie: he likes anime and stuff!! he’s all caught up on Naruto too!!! 

weeaboorichie: he lets me borrow his manga alllll the time

jsnjepson: woaaa!!!

jsnjepson: that’s so cool! I’m so happy for you!!! 

jsnjepson: you wanna have a movie night tonight? online? we can watch the movie for that anime you like

weeaboorichie: maybe sometime

weeaboorichie: I’m hanging out w Ethan tonight 

weeaboorichie: okay okay I gotta go!!

weeaboorichie: I love you so much 

jsnjepson: okay!! I love you prince

jsnjepson: have fun

*11/11/21, 6:58 PM*

*DMS with @jsnjepson and @weeaboorichie*

weeaboorichie: hey jace!! sorry it’s been so long 

weeaboorichie: I’ve been busy with my new school and Ethan and everything

*11/11/21, 8:43 PM*

weeaboorichie: jace?

weeaboorichie: sorry if ur busy I totally get it

jsnjepson: SORRY SORRY I’m so so sorry I’m sorry I was at Max’s house

jsnjepson: that’s fine that’s fine!! I’m glad you’re settling into things!!

jsnjepson: how’s everything going ?? how are you?

*12/02/21, 9:32 AM*

weeaboorichie: fine

weeaboorichie: school is nice! 

weeaboorichie: me and Ethan have an anime club now and it’s so cool we watch two episodes every Friday and it’s like book club but for anime

weeaboorichie: he’s so cool he got me a jujitsu kaisen hoodie for my birthday!!!

*12/02/21, 12:59 AM*

jsnjepson: that’s cool

jsnjepson: a bunch of scouts came to the last game at hfhs and talked to me and max

jsnjepson: we might get to go to a really good collage for this

jsnjepson: college

jsnjepson: what college are you going too? 

weeaboorichie: uh idk

weeaboorichie: I think the same one as Ethan he has it figured out and stuff

weeaboorichie: I want to at least

weeaboorichie: you could send me whatever college u wanna go too

weeaboorichie: I guess I could look into them

*01/01/22, 1:00 AM.*

weeaboorichie: happy new years

jsnjepson: happy new years

*02/16/22, 9:30 AM*

weeaboorichie: sry it’s been awhile since I checked in

weeaboorichie: hru?

*02/17/22, 2:54 AM*

jsnjepson: good 

jsnjepson: wbu?

weeaboorichie: fine

*02/20/22*

*03/05/22*

*03/15/22*

*03/20/22*

*03/29/22, 12:43*

jsnjepson: I dont think i’m in love with you any more

*Read*

[romsabombs]

malevolent 43 was insane so here are my notes. my live reactions while listening. enjoy :)

god i feel so sick already

EW AD☹️

okayyyy voices

is it kayne watching

oh god this again

hes way more dramatic this time i think

ermm??

yuck😨

omg queen!!! indeed queen💅💖

i have no idea whats going on

ohhh dang

IS HE GETTING CHAINED UP

im so nervous and scared and afraid

yorrick lore episode?? :3

ohhh yeahh he was the prince's skull

JOHNNNN🥳🥳🥳

omg yes talk to eachother!!! bond!

HAHA JOHN WHY ARE YOU TELLING HER ALL THIS

yesss KING AND QUEENNN

omg hastur he-who-is-not-to-be-named lord of carcosa thats the thing kayne said

OKAYYYYY 💅💅

WHO😐 HAHAAA💀💀

yesss you tell him girl!! they broke into YOUR house‼️

ohhh erm what😶

"i am the king in yellow" SHE DOESNT CARE JOHN

ermmmmmm erm erm uhh

i have no idea how to describe kingqueen relationship rn

"you are no god i have witnessed" "no. but i am a god" such good lines

she should read oscars note lol

LORE LORE LORE yess tell us about this world queen🎀

"and yet you moan on a table beneath my knife👹" okayyy shes vicious💅

YORRICK SNITCH

"my transition" okay🤨🏳️‍⚧️

yo i have no idea what's going on

she said i know what u are🤨

LILY MENTION LILY MENTION

👹LIES👹 girl we're having a moment

"you gained humanity as a prisoner" okayyy true hmmm..

gosh this is heavy

bestiary mentioned :))

her ass is NOT listening

i have no idea how to picture this scene in my head

ohh she was hurt by humans☹️ because her ass is a witch

two sides of the same coin

YOUR MOTHER? omg a name

arthur is straight up dead and we're doing the traumadumping hour

😀☹️😞 :( :( oh darling

mother darkness is my drag name

okay shes got a point tho🫡

YORRICK DONT HAHA shut up!!

oh!! :3

ermmm third wheeling over here

yorrick finally does something good (shuts the fuck up)

death for the undying⛓️💔

hell brings about the truth in people🔥🔥🔥 these lines go hard

im sure you did😒😒

can you believe this episode is 52 minutes long

imagine arthur laying on the floor family guy pose while all this emotional stuff is happening

BEDROCK RAAHHHH

"our" :3333

even the witch knows hes a child

"silent to all but those who can hear🗣️🗣️🗣️"

"i am not forgotten. not by him" :((

i remember you my king!! 🤓🥰

larson mansion arc throwback

"i saved him" erm you're the reason he went crazy in the first place

FUCK YOU👹 does she even know that word

john finally gets therapy not clickbait

ok shut up john my headphones are dying

ok we're back

"i tried to kill a man who i felt was in my way" 💀💀

HAHA SHES SO MEAN

okay now arthur is the child

dont go to the dark side pookie🙏

bro this shit is none of her business stay out of it

MY LOVE FOR ARTHURRREEE🥳🥳 WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!🔥‼️🗣️

ermm 😶 come on johnn🙏

arthur said i can fix him and then did!!

WOAHAHSHFHCBXNSN WHA😨😨

WOAHHHHH WHATATTTT QUEEN??

HAHAHA WHY DID YOU DO THAT

ERMMMMMMMM HES WHAT

😀😀HEAVY BREATHINGGG

OKAYYYYYYY JOHNN🥰🥰

RAHHHH👹👹👹 hes so sigma

yo what the hell is happening

😨😨😨😨HUH

this witch sure loves stabbing arthur

TRUEEE we r in her home!!

his ass is not really gone come on

do true loves kiss or whatever or like shed a tear and it'll land on him and he'll be alive again because magic

"🤢JOHN🤢" okayy rude🙄

mm yeah true why did you leave

😀john stay with us🙏🗣️ pretty pls

i miss arthurs voice its really nice

FRIEND MENTIONED like from s1 :3

HIS ASS ISNT GONE what would the show be without him bruh

jesus christ

NO NONONONOOO NO COME ON

🫣🫣 ermm 😶

man arthurs only purpose is to be a vessel huh :( :(

isn't john like bound to this body

what a mess :/ how will we fix this

girl u barely know him why do u care

"ignorant false morals" 😒girl

i wanna know what she thinks about the trolley problem

maybe don't listen to her she just murdered your boyfriend twice. thrice

GIRL YOU DONT EVEN KNOW HIM

shut up🙄 dont piss me off you killed my boy

ohh arthur i miss him already

erm john!!!! dont say allat😀

GOD DAMN IT we got so far man

hail to the king🗣️🗣️🗣️

NEW BODY??

ok now shes worshipping him😒

:( he says arthurs name so coldly. absolutely no emotion in his voice☹️

DONT TELL HER!!!!

ugh hes back to his kiy voice

im gonna kill myself actually

"think of the object you desire to find" imagine a rosetoy just appears

OH OH OH OH HAHA YEAHH HAHAA

this is awesome actually

faroes song goes hard

ohhh hes back :3

yorrick is so cutiepatootie

oh wait is he okay😨

OH NO

OH :3 HAHA YORRICK💀💀

insane episode

aye we cant save arthur without another deal with the devil i think

where's kayne when you need him

john this speech is embarrassing you're not an alpha wolf

john non binary arc🙏

..meaning??🧐

"i choose you. to be a part of you" ☹️ pokemon reference for a sec

yorrick embodiment of sillyness

yeah doll him up before reviving him

"your love for your friend" yorrick is so third wheeling

oh he feels human :3 i feel so sigma

cant we just let arthur stay dead let bro rest in peace he's been through enough

ARTHUR :33 WOAHHH😨😨

yeah i guess that musta hurt huh

yo is his ass okay😀😀

arthur is in Pain Painnn

ima have dreams about this one

[neptuniadoesstuff]

Finally finished this alcoholic old guy named Beef (joke) whom I'm deff not gonna take in hostage-

(Small Warning for main pics: Does contain scars & burns but those are healed so nothing too serious)

(Danger Man McGhee on the Left, Normie Beef Man on the Right)

So I am kinda feeling better but still kinda meh atm. Anyways some art I wanted my time on & think it's not really good. (This is for a DT btw but I doubt the person I'm having the dt with will approve since kinda just... boring imo..) (Except one of my frends ON SCREb FRIKIN "SIMPS" FOR HIM BCS HE HAS A BEARD-)

(BUT UNFORTUNATELY I CANT CHNAGE THAT NOW BCS MY NECK WILL START HURTING & ILL FRIKIN H8 MYSELF AGAIN SO YAY!)

Anyways imma tell you some things about this moron:

He's a complete idiot who's a mechanic, but due to him being a idiot he often hurts himself on accident. (Which explains the burns)

He is divorced 6 TIMES! But only has one kid named Jasoer who is the child of his first spouse. (Which makes Jasper his estranged son)

He's a alcoholic & sometimes passes out from drinking a lot. (Btw kids don't drink you'll prob pass out or even die)

He's jealous of Sanchi (my Fallout OC) bcs well... Sanchi is smarter than him also bcs ANGUS IS LITERALLY JUST A STICK WHILE SANCHI CAN LITERALLY SNAP HIM IN HALF IF HE SO WANTS TO!

He gave himself the nickname "Danger Man McGhee" which is the most stupidest name to think of but hey a idiot giving himself a dum nickname is prob like "The floor is made of floor" or smtn.

Despite his stupidity & his very poor taste in men (srsly bro yur first lover literally SCRAPED YUR FRIKIN ARMS FOR SOME MALIOUS REASON), he's a good fighter, however ever since he stopped raiding, he kinda just works on machines & be lazy.

Thats really it tbh. I'm just not really to well mentally so I'm not really well motivated to actually do a thing like actually talk to ppl. (Plz don't ask why its... personal)

Some Extras:

(Warning: Does contain lots & lots of bl00d on one of the extras so beware)

01:

The Moron w/o his cloth things & GoObLeS (God just smite me down I don't wanna be here anymore).

02:

McGhee but w/o the goggles which aren't even canon to Fallout or FNV.

03:

MaN, drawing the bl00d on this one was as hard as me trying to keep my sanity & not try to frikin screech at my mom anytime she won't leave me the frik alone. (Dont... ask... Again personal stuff)

Anyways that's all for the bonuses/extras. I hope you enjoy this, or don't, just don't dictate what ppl like or not, I'm just a random ahh kid on the net who draws for a hobby/living & is very much not sane.

Credits

Character was created & designed by me.

Art is mine. (Do not take w/o permission or imma throw u off a cliff)

Program: IbisPaint.

Bubs' TOS: Plz don't repost/steal, trace, or recolor my art WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! If you do, I'll take yur femur and pelvis.. SO, DON'T THINK ABOUT IT! (The PNS on my blog's pinned post clearly means "Please No Steal" plz follow that rule.) If you do post my art on anything like yur blog or somewhere else (With my permission) PLEASE CREDIT ME!

[huellitaa]

ྀི ୨ embarrassment ୧ ྀི

...is a social construct designed to make us feel bad by those who cant handle their own mistakes & or shortcomings.

seriously. like. it baffles me how people are still living in the mindset where they let embarrassment become anything more for them than a concept.

୨୧ embarrassment

- a feeling of self-consciousness, shame, or awkwardness.

embarrassment is perfectly normal. it happens to everyone because we all make mistakes. but some people let embarrassment and the fear of embarrassment consume them and the choices they make far too much, far too often.

♡ which leads me onto my first point; it is completely normal. everybody makes mistakes. this is our first time in this life and we are all learning & growing with our every choice, every action, every decision <3 remember that the next time youre panicking and freaking out because you made a mistake.

♡ its never that deep. i like to try be gentle w this stuff but lemme tell u straight no one actually cares . im serious,, like babes no one gives a shit honestly 😭😭 and your mentality should be the same. people remember this stuff n laugh for 5 mins and then theyre back to their life. and if they hang on to it for longer then theyre the one who should be embarrassed.. get a life pls??

♡ similar to what i said a moment ago , its. never. that. deep. laugh it off !!!!! giggle !!!!!! laugh about it !!!!!!!! nobody cares !!!!!! this shows that it doesnt faze you and this shows how confident you are within yourself that you dont let silly little mistakes bother you because they do not matter.

♡ when it comes to your interests, please never be embarrassed about these. this is something ive struggled with since i was little but never never never be embarassed of the things that bring you joy. if they arent hurting anyone and are perfectly okay you should never be embarrassed ab that. it makes you happy. why should you be ashamed of that for someone else???🩷

♡ has someone ever said something to you? made u doubt urself? then you get embarrassed ab it???? dont. do not even go there. i ws so insecure before (i know😭😭) and couldnt hold a single opinion for myself but when you know who tf you are you wont be doubting yourself for anyone ml.

♡ so... you wanna pursue your dreams but ur too embarrassed. ur too embarrassed and worried "what if this doesnt work" "what if it doesnt happen" n whatever other dumb shit ur worried abt and scared to outgrow your surroundings and evolve. wow. you know how silly that sounds? so.. like.. let me get this straight... youre telling me... that youre not doing what you love... for the sake of someone else or some silly little doubts????wow. you get one life n youre doing that. GET IT TOGETHER BABES. GET REAL. WHY WOULD U SABOTAGE URSELF LIKE THAT????? YOURE WORTH SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT LIKE 😭😭🩷🩷🩷🩷

♡ understand that peoples perceptions of you are often reflections of themselves just like your perceptions of others are often reflections of yourself. they think its embarrassing because they know for a fact deep down that theyd be too embarrassed and self conscious to do it themselves.

♡ and then watch the way they'll all come crawling back apologising and grovelling the moment you're rich and successful and got everything you ever wanted.. all because you had the confidence to trust in yourself and pursue what you wanted without listening to their self doubts. <3

♡ reverse psychology. "why r u doing that" "thats so cringey" why r u so wrapped up in my business? thats so cringey

♡ overall, confidence, strong self concept & trusting in your ability to bounce back from anything are the three main things that will never let you wallow in this silly little emotion again. embarrassment is like a pitiful, more insignificant, ridiculous version of fear. if ur gonna be scared then b scared of something worth ur time babe ur more than that <33

[sleepy159]

Firey Gaze

summary: fluff alphabet luka hsr

hey yall im not dead yet!!!! so heres some fluff :3 (might be ooc)

cw: cringe,other than that just fluff (i think dont qoute me on that))

wc: 1,238

also no beta we die like dazai

˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . °

A - admire - what do they admire about you?

•Confidence. He is very confident himself so, he honestly would be star struck if his partner was also confident, even just a little bit. It doesnt have to be confidence about your appearance just ANYTHING. A hobby, a collection, a friend, your boundaries, etc.

B - body - what is their favorite part of your body?

•Your eyes, he probably gets distracted by your eyes when hes fighting and gets hit.

C - cuddles - do they like to cuddle?

• At first he wouldn't because he would be scared his robotic arm would make you uncomfortable but once you reassure him, he warms up to it and loves to cuddle (would rather die than ask you to cuddle though, straight up drags you with him and cuddles you )

D - dreams - what do picture yalls future to be like?

•Luka would NOT wanna be tied down with kids. But hes always up for animals!! (hc hes a dog person.) Luka would like to eventaully live in the same house as you too.

E - early or late riser?

•He is 100% a morning person, wakes up at 5am with a shit load of energy and goes to do a full ass workout.

F - fight - how often do yall fight?

•Hes constanly fighting and getting beat up, coming home covered in blood and bruises on the verge of death.I think you would be worried and lecture him and he would say, "This is what i enjoy!" there will be fighting sometimes. Hes pretty good at apologizing though.

G - gentle - how gentle are they, emontally and physically?

•Ok, bbg is VERY emontally gentle, istg he will do anything for you, no questions asked as long as he gets a kiss or a hug as a reward. and physically? ok so he TRYS to be super gentle but because hes so strong and all that jazz, he might accidentally hurt you

H - honest - do they hide things from their s/o?

•ok he 100% shares almost everything with you, but,if you ask him if you look good in smth and he doesnt think so, he will be SWEATING."o-oh u-uhm! i-its...?" he wont give you a direct answer. but besides that, he wont keep secrets unless its for your own good. Also he wont give to many details about his past untill hes more comfy with you.

I - i love you - how long did it take for them to say ily

he hands you flowers and choclate before blurting it out, rubbing the back of his head nervously as he tries to act confident. If you reject him he will try to switch the topic. (awkwardly)

J - jealousy - how fast do they get jealous?

•Dont quote me on this but, he quite literality thinks Aphrodite (or Idrila?) came down and personally blessed you, hes very confident so he probs gets jealous like mediocrely fast but doesn't let it show until the person is like CLEARLY. hitting on you because he doesn't wanna be overbearing

K - kiss - where do they like to be kissed,where do they like to kiss you,what is kissing them like?

•he loves to be kissed on his nose OR knuckles, i cant explain why,also kiss his robotic hand and he will FOLD. likes to kiss right underneath your eye and your forehead because hes pure like that. hes probably not that experienced in kissing you so you might have to guide him but,hes like so confident when hes kissing you, you forget if he does smth wrong. will ask for kisses without shame.

L - little ones - how are they w/ kids?

•Hes fucking amazing with kids,tells them storys, feeds them, helps them, like hes amazing with them but doesnt want to feel tied down with a family so he visits the moles a lot.

M - memory - whats their fav memory of you?

•one time you needed to burn off some steam and he suggested that you could spar with him, with a little bit of convincing, you agreed and something about seeing you sweating and moving around in the dimly lit room just like made him feel butterflys, no i cant explain why.

N - nicknames - what do they call their s/o?

•alrighty, he would call you like weird nicknames as a joke to embarrass you, but fr? he uses "love" for a pet name

O - open - how long does it take for them to open up to you?

• About his past? depends. He doesnt really keep his past a huge secret but he 100% wont bring it up unless you ask because he finds opening up to be awkward and a sign of weakness (unless its someone else venting, then its fine just not him.)

P - patience - how quickly are they annoyed?

•Doesnt get annoyed fast because he quite literately spends his whole life training and then still fails sometimes, so hes very patient, and when his patience runs thin, either he is not aware and might snap at you, or hes very aware and runs away to avoid snapping at you

Q - quizzes - how much do they remember about you?

•Forgets his own age but he does remember the important things about you like your birthday, favorite candy, color, etc!

R - rainy day - what do they like to do on rainy days?

•he loves to take you outside and find worms, stomp in puddles, pull pranks on random people, etc. You gotta remeber hes still a kid (17) also if you get a cold the next day, hes apologizing like his life depends on it

S - security (hahahahah got you) - how protective are they?

•he knows you can protect yourself because he has probably taught you some self defense moves, but if hes there and some person is like trying to touch or or assault you, lets just say its a gorey sight<3

T - talk - what do they like to talk to you about?

•Everything and nothing, he shares all the gossip with you. also, bring up the topic of insects and suddenly hes reciting to you a whole ass book about them

U - ugly - what is a red flag of theirs?

•After a fight,he will just shower you in praises and everything to try and get you to stop being mad,now you might think "oh this isnt that bad!!!" to which your right in some degree BUT it’s a little manipulative core

V - vanity - how concerned are they with their looks?

•Considering hes a champion of Belobog, he is pretty concerned about his looks, he LOVES when you compliment him, will never forget it.

W - whole - would they feel complete w/o you?

•Would mange ok physically, his performance might falter a little but emotionally? if hes opened up to you, hes not recovering. But of course he plays it off because he’s to proud for that. (will beg for you back if given the opportunity.)

X- xtra - random hc for them

•Loves to show you off,basically the whole of belobog knows you two are dating.

Y - yuck - what is something they would not like in a partner?

• A overly sympathetic person, no i can’t explain this one and please don’t get mad at me

Z - zzz - what are they like when they sleep?

•if you guys are cuddling, you might break a rib or two from him holding you so tightly.

˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . °

a/n: i got these hcs out of satans ass,so if they are ooc,please tell me

[lokissweater]

omg my dream has always been to live in a cottage w u and picking mushrooms to make a stew for wifey 🫵😣💞 BUT UR ABSOLUTELY RIGHT ABT IF HE WANTED TO HE WOULD TYPE VIBES bc that’s hot, like YOU thought of that? WITHOUT ME TELLING U TO TOO 😻😻😻

girl I’ve had a talking stage that ended badly bc bro is emotionally immature but he’s not over me, and it’s been 5ish months since we last talked??? (I thought I was delusional) but he’d always jump into this ONE topic every time I’m near him—he’s also loud in class too and he would not even talk abt this topic if I’m not there (unfortunately we have the same classes in this semester) to make me jealous??? But I’m like bro……. Why would I be jealous of ur immature ass when I have a wife at home that writes like an angel descended from heaven herself and my 2D men to satiate me 🫵😻 like unless ur 6’2” white haired with blue orbs for eyes, don’t talk to me 🎀🎀🎀 (bro literally flinched backward when I walked past him like he did not go near me first… please…)

ANYWAYS BOY TALK OVER, I WANNA GIVE READER BESTIE TONS OF SMOOCHES PLSSSS 🫵😣 and they’ve known each other for so long??? That’s the cutest thing ever omgogmg ik damn well if gumi upsets reader, bestie would swoop in and be mrs steal yo girl and will be on his ass for fumbling reader (but I have mega trust that he wouldn’t do that, he literally worships the ground she walks on as he should, bare minimum guys 🫦🫦🫦)

since u said BJ gumi will be a thing, lemme share another freak crumb… let’s say gumi was watching reader get ready for tryouts… she was putting on lip gloss… and what if he uses the tip of his saber to smear another special lip gloss for reader… WHAT WHO SAID THAT 🤨🤨🤨

on a side note, I’ve collected 2 vers of mr blue eyes, a yuta nendo!! (I got him for $30!! My friend bought 2 of those lucky draws from new years good smile deal thing, AND SHE GOT YUTA??? SHE KNEW I LOVED JJK SO I BOUGHT IT OFF FROM HER FOR $30 😖🫶 ) and kuroo from Haikyuu + Karma from AssClass (I was waiting for a nendo of him for YEARS; I sent in a request to GSC to make one and they did for 10th anniversary 🫣) next on my list, I’d love to collect megumi+toge (bc of you, I grew to love them even more 🥹💞) I hope to see you post pics of ur sora and gumi hehe 😻😻🫶🫶 LOVE U LOTS AND STAY WARM ML 💞💞💞

Ps. I SAW U TALK ABT XAV FROM LND?? DO U PLAYYY… heh

- 🎀

NO BECAUSE LITERALLY !!!!! i’m not about to tell you MAN … tell me to get down on my knees and shut me up with your glow stick 🤨🤨🤨 quick 🤨🤨

IM FUCKING DEEEAAAADDDD WHAT A MOOORRROOONNNN !!! ABSOLUTELY THE FAWKKKK NAAAWWWWTTTT !!! ofc he’s not over you you are literally the definition of a baddie him being in SHAMBLES IS A GIVEN !! AND FUCKING LET. HIM. let that man suffer because your blue eyed honored one would NEEEEEEVVVUUURRRRR do that shit to you so actually dont settle for less and LET HIM BE FUCKING STUPID ! AND LMFOAAOAOOAOA YOU ARE SO FUNNYYYY AND LITERALLY bc i write strictly for yall and yall only i will continue to pump out these juicy 2D men that are RESPECTFUL so we can reflect this in the irl 😻😻

AND AAAACCTUALLLYYYYYY readers best friend HAS AND WILLLL !!! she literally watches him like a hawk to make sure he’s not effing up and hurting miss pretty little reader, which ofc is a rare occurrence 😻😻 but she WILL turn and BAAARRKKK if there so even is a sniff of reader upset over mlb!megumi and i live by that.

but alas… gumi can be rest assured !!!!! cause he’d rather burn in hell than run the risk of reader leaving him 🫦🫦🫦 i’m wet.

MY BABY BLUE BOWS I LOOOVEEEE YOUR FREAKY MIND SO FUCKING MUCH ITS NOT EVEEENNNN FUUUUNNNYYYYYYY !!!! THE WAY I JUMPED UP AND DOWN AND SCREAMED AND IVE COME HERE TO SAY CONGRATULATIONS !!! IM ADDING THIS IN THE FAWKING FIIIICCCCC !!! BABEUFHSIBSJS and then he’s making reader lick it all up after— BIIIITTTTCCCCHHHHHH—

AND OMGGGG WTFFF YOUR NENDO LINE UP IS SOOOO COOOOLLLLL 😭😭😭 W FOR YUTA THAT IS SUCH A STEEAALL !! and GSC is actually so in love with you and obsessed with you for that bro AND LET ME TELL YOU that i know for a FACT sir hollow purple is working up in those headquarters, saw your email, looked you up on linkedin, fell in love, and pitched in the idea just to see you happy he literally told me himself 😻 no i will not be taking further questions 😻

AHHHH I WILL I WILL I FUCKING ORDERED MORE BFIDBSJS SO IM GONNA WAIT UNTIL I GET THEM ALL AND PUT THEM ON MY CUTE LIL WEEB SHELF TO SHOW YALL 🫦🫦💕💕💕

i ADDOOOREEE YOU MWAH MWAH THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING 🥹🥹💕💕💕 PLS STAY NICE AND TOASTY AND HEALTHY FOR ME OR I WILL ACTUALLY START SCRATCHING MY SKIN AWWWFF !!!

and YESSS I DOO THOUGH ITS BEEN A FAT MINUTE !!! … xavier makes me go into cardiac arrest 💕💕

I LOVE YOU !!

[mikeyswayy]

hey, uh. hi. yeah. sorry i dont know why im doing this. im pretty sure youre dead. god i hope you arent. maybe this is just the digital form of visiting someones grave eh? yeah, i dunno. its lonely without you. keep wanting to tag you in things, god i fucking wish i could still tag you in things. i was a little scared to send this one, even just to write it, but id rather you be alive and proving me a fool for writing this than dead. maybe with my luck the universe’ll wanna make me look stupid so bad that ur actually fine. i miss you. ive been waiting the past few days you know that? waiting to be wrong waiting for you to come back waiting for this to be like the other times, but its been four days now. i just. i hope you found peace man, i hope if you are dead its better than anything ever was back here, you deserve it.

while im here i figure i may as well catch you up on everything goin on, not anywhere near as good as getting to freak out about it on here with you but i think its the best im gonna get. so basically a couple days ago frank posted five random dates in the shape of the mcr logo and that was. jesus frank. the dates are 11/13, 2/16, 3/7, 2/24, and 12/6. i now live in fear. and then today the official mcr account posted a picture with a background that looks reminiscent of paper kingdom, oh god, 150 peices of,, ash? confetti?? falling down over large red letters that spell out a backwards k and then cr. so basically. going insane over if this is mcr5 or not. fuck youll never get to see mcr5 will you? fucking scary, feels wrong to get excited about it without you. i hope youre okay, i really fucking hope youre okay and all this is for nothing i hope youre in the hospital because soneone found you before it was too late and you just cant have your phone because of it, i hope you didnt even do anything and youre just staying off tumblr just anything, please, fuck man you have to be okay alright?? im scared, i really miss you, i know we werent that close or even close at all but you mean do much to me alright i need you i need you to be fine. i hope you see this. oh, on the topic of not being close, i uh. never learned your real name. i made a small patch with your username and put it in the left breast pocket of my coat, i hope thats alright. wanted you close to me and all

i think thats it, so uh. this is goodbye i suppose. i didnt get to say goodbye before. saw your post 2 hours late. it hurts, i try not to get too caught up in the what ifs though. its hard. so goodbye friend, until next time. i hope to see you again. i love you.

I'm not dead!

I'm sorry I scared you like really badly but I'm okay

What happened was I like almost didn't but I didn't go deep enough to do any real harm to myself

I cut a little but not the full way so I'm fine but if I had went all the way I would probably be gone bc no one did like come in my room for a while after

I've just been staying off of here and not really posting because I didn't really think anyone would really care if I was dead or not

But I know you do

Also I really appreciate you saying what's been happening with MCR thank u

I know abt everything but still u telling me is really sweet, thank you

The patch is really nice, thank you

I feel like doing something similar since u did that and I probably scared the living shit out of you so yeah something with ur user maybe idk is that weird idk

I love you too man

I'm really sorry for scaring you I just didn't know what to do that day and I'm sorry for not really posting anything after that 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

[definitelynotnia]

sorry i have to rant or i will cry i hate when im so angry that the anger comes out as tears

tw: random guy being a general asshole abt lgbtq and trans ppl so if you dont wanna deal with that today, cz ik there's already enough hate literally everywhere online, then please save yourself from this burden and move along, i hope u have a nice day bcz if i cant then someone should

i just spent my whole afternoon arguing with this guy- it was such a waste of my time i haven't slept properly last night and i wanted to take a nap but my nap time is GONE i hate this i told him im done with this conversation and that i dont give a shit about him enough to want to educate him on things and have him change his opinion i TOLD HIM IM DONE i told him that he can keep his opinion shoved up his ass and as long as he doesn't bully people i dont give a shit i was READY TO GO TAKE MY NAP but nooo this bitch is like "just say you've run out of valid points" like BITCH NO.

i can't have valid points to counter you with because all the points ur giving me are utter bullshit like how the fuck am i supposed to reply to "ppl assigned male at birth wearing skirts and make up is worse than war" like WHAT???? DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF??? ARE YOU INSANE? what the fuck am i supposed to respond to that with? except that trans people aren't hurting anyone and war is, and he's like "at least war can be contained, these people are spoiling the mentality of the youth" like YOU ARE THE SPOILED YOUTH not the other way around, im like listen if you were really pressed about children and how trans inclusivity impacts children then you would have at least read more about that but if your first point is only "they're doing surgery on children" then clearly you have not even done as much as a simple google search so we both know that you just heard that in some random reel and went with it and you dont give two shits about the supposed 'children being made to undergo surgery', which they're not, and all you actually care about is looking cool and edgy by hating on the lgbtq community because thats whats in trend right now in india. he's like these people are too privileged why cant they just shut up and enjoy life they are rich like first of all rich people can have problems too??? also being able to afford therapy and gender affirming care does not equal to rich thats like saying if someone in ur family has any chronic illness ur automatically rich like ??? also poor people are trans too? and im so sick of these ppl thinking being trans is just an american thing or a first world problem like brother no? you are literally living in india trans people are mentioned in the FUCKING SCRIPTURES are u KIDDING ME? being trans is not a new sudden occurence its been there for longer than you have. like literally after 2 hours of conversation the only points he could think of to hate on lgbtq for no reason is

they are rich and privileged so they shouldnt have problems

if they have a problem with their gender they should keep it to themself and not fight it (??????)

they are running from their problems (they are literally solving the problem thats the part which everyone is mad abt its when trans people try to solve the problem by being okay with expressing themselves freely and to counter i said that even alcoholics are running from their problems ive never seen any of u andrew tate cocksuckers ever make a "joke" bullying alcoholics he's like thats different like literally all his "points" are him just saying whatever and then if u try to explain it with logic he'll be like no but thats ok bcz i said so and this is wrong bcz i said so like fuck you dude)

they shouldnt have rallies and stuff because there's more important things like war that the government should focus on (he was the one who said "war is a beacon of peace there cannot be peace without war" when i had first mentioned that its ironic that out of all the bad things happening in the world rn LIKE war the biggest thing he's worried about is a "man" wearing a skirt but ok sure now all of a sudden war is a big boo boo and we should all be focusing on that, so basically when he wants to hate on ppl war is irrelevant but when a marginalised group wants to fight for their rights that time war is the most important point and no one elses suffering is valid bcz there is war)

it is spoiling today's youth (im not even gonna talk about this because i do not see how people living their lives and just existing is considered "spoiled" and "corrupt" but people regularly hating on, bullying and degrading a whole ass community just because they are uneducated swines lacking critical thinking skills and a spine that saw some 'famous' youtuber or influencer or wtv or maybe a reel with 'dark humor' dissing on lgbtq and pronouns and 'blue haired girls' and now they thing they're oh so cool and edgy and dIfFeReNt and "not like those woke snowflakes" just cz they degrade and bully a whole community of people every chance they get)

im so done im SO DONE with this bullshit its EVERYWHERE its a trend now to be hateful and mean and an asshole to anyone who isnt "normal" according to heteronormative standards. i understand not having an opinion, to some extent ok i get it you're young you don't need to be involved in this yet but no, they want to have an opinion but they will do no research they physically shudder at the thought of reading a book and god forbid they actually google up a trustworthy article to confirm some of the bullshit they believe they will do none of this but they will scream and shout about how lgbtq is the problem and magically that is the only "social issue" they care about and they care soo vehemently apparently that they have to post about it and make dArK jOkEs about it and use slurs and degrade them every chance they get because THEY are harmful yes sure you who are actively spreading hate are the angelic saviours of society and a community of people JUST EXISTING are the ones that are harmful, right.

[strawberrymilkwithastraw]

ok, i need to rant about how I feel about mitski for a minute,, (cw suicide, mental illness eating disorder etc)

the thing is i was in mitskis top 0.05% of listeners back in 2020 (when I was going through probably my worst mental health crisis ever) and so much of her lyrics feel like they have been ripped out of my soul.

thinking specifically about i bet on losing dogs, that one I interpret/see as my relationship to mental illness/disorders. The idea that you are unable to quit the feeling and the spiral, and you know what will happen if you are to continue but you are addicted to the feeling or the familiarity of it. I feel like I am completely responsible for almost all of my bad habits and issues,, but I also feel unable to break out and live differently. the line "I always want you when I am finally fine" feels so eating disorder coded, the idea that healing is actually the losing part of the game, that I want to get back to the feeling of hurting myself because it is familiar and comforting. you want to get back in the game and starve yourself again (I wanna feel it), even if you know its harmful, because at least you know it. I also relate to that line with the feeling of suicidal ideation, like,,, that you know its bad for you, but you cant help but fall for it. the fact that eating disorders are so competitive in terms of sickness feels relevant as well, like losing is another win, "some one to watch me die" as long as you stay with the self destructive habits you know they will always be there for u

i think if im not harming myself i dont know who I am. like as long as I make it known, or as long as I'm trying to harm the person I am, that its ok, because then other people know that I also hate me. like, I don't like me either don't worry.

i want to feel it- that line for me feels so relatable to the idea of needing to feel bad. because at least you are feeling something. i don't know what I want out of life, besides to not be in it. i feel like I don't recognize myself without any illnesses. or whatever

[taegularities]

Rid you're crazyyyyyyyyyyy

just finished cmi11 IM FUCKING CRYING holy shit that was so good oh god

first of all the conversation between oc and her mom made me cry so hard- it hit home for me, as a girlie with mommy issues, that part felt so real to me. Oc's courage to stand up for herself like that and tell her how much she hurt her own daughter is something i dont have in me. It broke my fucking heart, that yearning feeling, i cant believe you put that specific feeling into words rid [are u part of the mommy issues community as well🧐 or are u just that amazing, a true fucking artist (i saw that anon calling you the beyonce of ff and i agree 100%)] idk how to describe my feelings rn, that part definitely left a mark in my heart, ill never forget it

second the domesticity in these two dorks oh my goddddd they're driving me crazy, theyre so cute and in love and im in love with them and i want to cry bc i want what they have but bc irl men suck the hopeless romantic in me is gonna have to live through fanfics for the rest of my life and that makes me fucking miserable but bless the fanfic gods like you that keep my soul alive, idk what id do without you

lastly that scareeeeee oh god like i knew itd be a negative but it had my heart beating out of my ass (idk if thats a phrase) but the way they handled it oh god, the emotionsssssss the fears and insecurities, just reminded me that theyre human, even if theyre the most fucking adorable characters ever, theyre still human and i loved seeing such nuance. You really are doing an amazing job rid, not only writing the story, scenes and dialogue, but also the way you write these characters in such depth, its so fucking refreshing to see.

i want to kiss your beatiful head that holds your beautiful brain, seriously ive never ever been so enchanted by a piece of writing before (and i read so much fanfiction its like an addiction) you are by far my strongest fix. For real tho, your writing, and particularly cmi has touched me deeply and I'll never ever forget it. So thank you

Rest assured and stop doubting yourself bc youre seriously incredible and so fucking talented. Now rest up and take care of yourself, i imagine its not easy to birth such work (i mean 36k you monster, i loved every second of it but damn girl take a break before you burn your brain out) but no srsly i hope youre eating well, sleeping well and doing things that make you happy and relaxed. You deserve all the best of this world rid🫂🩷

sincerely ~ 🐼✒️anon

panda hi hello oh my gosh, sorry for being late, but you mentioned so many important things, so i wanted to take my time HELLO!! never stop sending these lovely af reviews 🥺

i know... she really is inspiring bc the courage to stand up against someone you feared for so long is admirable. i'm part of both the mommy and daddy issues community even though it's gotten a lot better lol like i wonder why it's such a recurring theme in my fics 🤣 i'm so sorry you could relate to oc :( but i'm glad you liked the scene so much.

and ahhh the domesticity 🤧 it's been so so fun and relaxing to write!! real life romance can be hard to find, yeah :') so i guess writing these scenes and chapters has been extra cathartic (although it drives me crazy, too — the next chapter has been making me so jejfhdjjsgd), but here's to finding a cmi jk irl soon :') much more to come!!!🕯️

the scare was one hell of a ride 🥺 i cried a lot!! and even i have been realising lately that i sometimes try to make my characters flawless, but that's actually not what i wanna go for. i always snap out of it and then try to make them flawed bc they're human, and i think the cmi couple, despite how endearing they are, is definitely vv flawed :') thank you for pointing that out 🥺

your strongest fix?? girl PLEASE ILL CRY 😭💔 i love you so much, you're so sweet for saying that and seeing me in such a way, pls i want you here forever <3 i rested a lot after cmi11! but ngl, cmi11.5 almost burned me out ksjdhehd gonna rest even more after that hehe. tyssssm, i hope you're well and healthy and i appreciate you so much for your kindness, reassurances and love for this series/me. love you so much 🤍

[bonesandthebees]

I know ive already talked about a dusty tomb but like BRO i need to talk about it again but this time more emotional bc like snfnfmdmsbmfsoehfkfkb [combusts]

It is my comfort fic

Like out of allll the fics i have saved as my comfort fic, it's honestly the most? Efficient? If that makes sense

I click my speeddial button, scroll to the end of the fic (or when sbi first meet, depends on my mood) and then BAM, instant serotonin

Often the fics i love for comfort are hurt comfort, which makes reading them when Im sad a risky move, and i end up making myself more sad than not 😭

And ofc, i have pure fluff fics too, but they never hit as hard as your writing does, i dunno

Also literally it's so quick too, i just read like 2 sentences and im like "damn okay, got my sandduo fix for the day. I am happ now"

A dusty tomb is so simple, yet so effective, and it's just honestly really cute without being super cheesy and aaaa i love it sm and tysm for writing it cause it's honestly like one of the things that helps me the most rn whenever im sad, besides yknow, healthy coping mechanisms LMAOO, dont worry i gen do those too, but sometimes u just need a quick read before bed. Which yeahhh the amount of times ive read it to help me sleep... it's not even that old of a fic 😭

Wait.

IT'S FROM FEBRUARY?@,#?$(@;$($(*#

.

I thought it came out in may WTF

What...

Okayyy, existential crisis about time aside, it's a good fic. A really good fic. Genuinely one of my fav fics ever (tho i feel like i wanna reread the clinic prequel ngl... that was my go to comfort fic before a dusty tomb came around. I havent read that one in awhile). I just love fantasy aus so much, more than any other au, and goshhh it has all the best tropes in it and and and and *dies*

I dont think I'll ever get bored of this fic, considering it's been out for 4 months, and it still feels fresh to me

Goddd, dust!sandduo u guys live rent free in my mind, twinsduo and emduo too. I love them all so much :( honestly that techno is sooo <33 can he give me a hug pls, i feel like he'd be a good hugger

Anyways im off to sleep now or well maybe reread the clinic prequel fic ehehehehe god i love that fic so much (u have no idea how many times ive reread that... too many times... it actually makes me Insane)

aaa this is so sweet!! tbh I loved writing dusty tomb so much. it was so out of the blue and unplanned, but it was so sweet and i had a ton of fun with the world itself too

I'm so glad it's your comfort fic. I have those fics too where I just open them up and go to a specific part to reread just to get all those fuzzy feelings whenever I need a pick me up. It makes me so happy to know my fic is that for you.

one of these days I'll write another one shot in that universe.... maybe... probably not tbh but the idea is there

(also i love dust!techno too he's so fun)

(and the clinic prequel aaaa underrated personal fav of mine)