#i dont rly know what else to tag this

[luck-of-the-drawings]

"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.

[hungryhyena]

woof

[slingbats]

anyway here's my gotham oswald playlist that no one asked for

[phagodyke]

dating an art student was so crazy I'm just thinking abt that one birthday I had where my ex got me stickers from the etsy of the person they were cheating on me with....

[snailcubezz]

also i remade my pn sona (again) :)c

[jinstronaut]

this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh

[hertwood]

.

[pillbug-hanjis]

scribbly Chan doodle i did while watching the 200th Channie's room! it was the first one ive ever been to 💛

[tsukana]

this isnt meant to be neg at all but i do genuinely want to know quackity and/or the qsmp admins reasonings for the server hours during the purgatory event being what they are. Because even as a viewer in PST zone, i was very ? when they dropped it since like. theres already been repeated issues with events being so late for EU time zone streamers and for a 2 week long server wide event to be like that was. surprising?

[scarysanctuary]

im not sure if it says something about me, but i find it pretty rare to find a villain that is just mindlessly evil, that gets a thrill out of being cruel, and hurts others just because they can. of course youve got characters that are actually diagnosable as psychopaths, and cant feel empathy, but i dont think most villains are like that, well, not the good ones at least. they may do bad things, but most of the time they have reasons that they think justifies their actions, which ends up being a mirror to the ugliest things humanity has to offer.

[haunthouse]

i don't know a ton about my family history but the last couple times i've seen my family they've mentioned offhand the fact that my great grandpa was a communist and was passionate about preserving yiddish literature and that if he was still alive i'd have great conversations with him about the horrors of capitalism and could practice my yiddish with him. and it's so weird to be told you're similar to someone you only met once when you were like 6 years old and will never have the option of meeting again

[orcelito]

I always find it kind of funny what some other ppl consider "slow burn". Like I've been reading a fic that the writer repeatedly said was slow burn, but some 40k words in and they've had their first kiss...

I'm not complaining, but that just doesn't feel like that slow of a burn to me lmao. But Then Again, this is coming from the person who writes some of the slowest of burns... not the slowest, mind you, but like. In discacc, I'm pretty sure their first kiss happened around... what, 400k words in? Something like that. And they hadn't even officially Met (in person) until like some 70k words in.

And Then there's ITNL. Currently 74k words, and Wolfwood hasn't even officially entered the story yet.

We're in for the long haul, y'all :]

[skylordhorus]

do u ever go in a tag for something you enjoy and realise ‘oh i have a vastly different scope on what being a fan is wrt this’

[milkteadrinker]

just realized we can like make our posts cannot be reblogged so i think im gonna use this whenever i talk abt personal or random stuff

[dysphoriccanada]

my entire childhood i was terrified of admitting things about me or opening up because i was scared my family wouldnt understand. i was the first born grandchild, i was the eldest daughter, i was academically gifted, and i often felt i was more a possession you show off at dinner parties than the nine year old who wanted to share an ice cream. i wouldnt verbalize how touching without me initiating made my skin crawl, how not knowing what to eat at a restaurant made me want to cry, or how loud and unexpected things made me paranoid for days. i didnt want to shatter their reality because then theyd just be left with me. and i wasnt sure thats what they wanted.

when i turned sixteen, my doctor presented me with a task. she told me she wanted me to pay attention to every action around me; take in all the details, keep a journal of the tiniest moments. she wanted me to try and focus on the little good moments, to help me see the good in mine and my families relationships. i never took her seriously when she said these things, but i did it anyways, for laughs, and for something to do.

the entries started small at first. my sister making a point to come find me at lunch to see if i was eating anything. my mom standing next to me while i cried because the binder i ordered didnt fit. my dad keeping a playlist of music we both liked equally when we had to drive somewhere together. things i felt that they did only because that was a very normal action or reaction.

then i made a mistake, and i spent christmas of 2018 in the hospital, and my nites on the little things kept piling up. my dad came to see me every day on his lunch break without fail. my mom brought me a new book every couple of days. my sister called every night (she was and still is terrified of hospitals) to say a prayer for me. my dad bought me a stuffed animal that reminded me of my childhood dog, and my sister sent him her chore money so he could get me a better blanket after mom mentioned i didnt like how stiff the hospital sheets were.

i chalked it up to me being in a delicate place, and they didnt want me to feel like i was disappointing them. my doctor told me to keep writing in the journal. the little things started to become more noticeable after i got home.

my dad and i dont hug and we never really have. but he always stands close enough that i can press my forehead to his shoulder or lets me grab his sleeve when im stressed. my mom has trouble with my name, but she’s always the first to introduce me as her son, because thats the title that matters most. my sister doesnt like talking about her problems and hates when i try to involve myself with her relationship status, but im the first person she calls when she needs to talk during a drive, or when shes freaking out over an assignment.

then my doctor told me to take notice of the rest of my family. the ones i was so scared of tellling.

my grandma doesnt make me talk to her, but she scrunches up her nose and eyes at me across the table to show me she’s acknowledging im there. my papa keeps a copy of every school picture of me in his wallet. my mothers sister cried when i told her, then made her husband grab me a beer so i could practice pretending to like it because she didnt want her son to try and crack any jokes about me not being man enough to chug. the quilt thats been on my bed at my grandparents for the past three years has been the same, but i only noticed the tiny signature on the corner last week, telling me its a quilt my great grandmother made.

my cousin told me i was his little brother always, and his girlfriend told me im always welcome in their home and that the upstairs spare bedroom is pretty much mine whenever i need it. my best friend of seventeen years gets me that cheesy “birthday boy” ribbon from the dollar store every year without fail. my coworker told me her son - who i babysit - wanted to invite me to “boys day” with him and his dad.

my entire childhood i was so focused on the big picture of all the things my family didnt do - things i didnt even want to happen in the first place - that i was completely lost on all the things they did do. my family loved me. just only in the ways they thought i would better understand.

im 22 this year. on monday my grandma is taking me to the hospital so i can get bloodwork done. im getting my natural hormone levels tested so that my doctor knows how much testosterone i’ll need for my shots. afterwords she wants to show me her recipe for honey-bread, and my papa wants me to sit with him and watch some new nature documentaries. my sister cant wait to get home for reading week so i can braid her hair the way she likes and read her study notes out loud so she can retain them better. my mom and i are gonna visit her side of the family so i can tell them the good news. and my dad - with our updated playlist - is gonna help me assemble my new bookshelf.

it’s the little things.

[nomairuins]

aww its kinda cute finding me complaining abt my dads whole lisa thing from 2017. honestly so overshadowed by everything else and also i was so annoying when i was 12 aw .