#i dont really mind the thought but sometimes

[milkochaa]

i hate it when my episodes r bad enough that it's affecting my day-to-day functionality lmao

I dread going to work again and it's all due to my depressive episode causing me to spiral for the worse

And my coping mechanism is unhealthy, like I'm obsessively reading fics abt my faves n if I don't consume said media, I wld lose it all over again,,, the way they're my anchors is hilarious, pls 😟 make it end

the compartmentalisation n intellectuallising my emotions n feelings cld only work for so long before I tipped over again

I had a mini breakdown over my mom giving out my number to a family member without asking me for permission n she brushed it off as family and I still don't like it bc I know they're going to pester me and disturb abt niceties that makes me wanna claw my eyes out

I'm never good enough for them nor anyone for that matter lol

bc I failed my classes one too many times in college then I can't land a job fast enough or I can't stay in a job long enough then the job I am in isn't good enough or anyth of the sorts

the gifted kid to a problem child adult pipeline is so real lmao

sometimes I just wanna go back to when I was 12 and plan my future nicely 🤷🏻‍♀️ maybe smth would've change, maybe that time around

[meowmeow1meow]

dude anytime i think of this the smell mustve been so insane

[puppppppppy]

learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way

[amyrosedaily]

Day 29: Caught you!

PLEASE! Donate to save Muhammad Shehab's family! Main Post | GoFundMe

[willyhoos]

"shadows are inverted flames" -> wilsons hair is made of shadow -> YOUR BOYFRIEND'S HAIR IS MADE OF FLAME??? PETPETPETPET

also wilson can't leave the throne so he just has to deal with her doing this 24/7

[crystallizsch]

Hello! I would like to say that your art my favorite in the entire fandom, I don't know how to describe it but it just feels the best 💃 The way you draw the characters is very nice, Jamil is one of my favorites and you have his personality captured very nicely! Anyway, I hope you have a good day and I hope a lifetime supply of your favorite food drops from the sky for you 🤸‍♀️

AAHH THIS IS MAKING ME CRYYY ANON

i've never received a compliment about my art like this before so that's such an honor to hear 😭💕💕

THANK YOU SO MUCH I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST (*chucks this out here as another thanks*)

[greasydumbfuck]

thinking about frank and sex (in a sad way)

[perilegs]

shoutout to people working their dream jobs doing something mundane

[javierduffy]

ohh javieran … javieran post kieran’s death .., javier is a poor lonesome cowboy in america a long way from home with no more sweetheart to sit and talk with him ooohhh can anyone hear me ….

[sosoribro]

top 10 friend

10: all of them

9: all of them

8: all of them

7: all of them

6: all of them

5: all of them

4: all of them

3: all of them

2: all of them

and coming in at number 1 you know them you love them its

1: all of them

[crowleyholmes]

Bonus:

Don't mind me, I was just thinking about how Crowley must feel every time Aziraphale seems to put him in a box with the rest of hell. I know he tells him he's nice and kind and good and his friend just as many times or more, but still - after 6000 years of friendship and Doing The Right Thing together, it must have hurt when Aziraphale told him he's evil, and then even more when he told him you're the bad guys.

I just find it sooo interesting to look into every instance of Aziraphale talking about Crowley in either way. I want to take his thought process apart and study it under a microscope. We know that he knows that Crowley isn't evil, and we know that Crowley knows that he knows, and we (and Crowley) know that Aziraphale (up until a certain point) is just incredibly Heaven-brainwashed and it's hard for him to break out of that unless there's a situation at hand that requires Direct Action (see giving away the flaming sword to protect Adam and Eve, or protecting Job's children, or helping Elspeth to help Dalrymple, or stopping the Apocalypse).

How does he travel the world and the ages with Crowley and still somehow manage to call him evil with any level of seriousness? He is so convinced that all demons are evil, and at the same time he knows that Crowley's fall was unjust and a mistake and Crowley is NOT evil, but Crowley is a demon, but he's good and kind and nice and just, and Aziraphale sometimes struggles with that. Not consciously, I think, consciously he loves Crowley and trusts him and knows him well enough to see beyond angel/demon good/evil black and white thinking, but sometimes thoughts slip out of his mouth that are just. So far removed from what we know he knows.

He believes so strongly, in two things that could not be more mutually exclusive, and it's so fascinating. There's a lot of growth in that regard over the course of the series, we know that by the end of season 2 when he's talking to the Metatron, he is very clear in stating that his priority and his loyalty lie with Crowley, not with heaven. And I hold firm to my belief that he is going to Heaven because That's The Right Thing To Do, because he believes he can Make Things Better, for everybody, yes, but most importantly for Crowley. For the two of them!!

And YET. AND YET "you're the bad guys" somehow comes out of his mouth, when Crowley has Never really been a part of hell, and has always wanted to do the right thing for as long as Aziraphale has known him, and has been free of hell for Years now.

Still, Crowley is a Demon, and Demons Are Evil, angels and demons are hereditary enemies, right?

Except.... it's a little different when it's someone you know, isn't it?

[devondespresso]

writing my silly little fic and again im struck with how much opportunities they missed by pretending the s2 stancy breakup wasn't messy, specifically for Nancy's guilt about barb and forcing herself to grow up too fast

like s1 Nancy spends one night being a stupid teenager goofing off at her boyfriend's party and staying over to get spicy while Barb goes home. then she later realizes Barb disappeared and died that one night she was letting go and having fun. this is widely recognized trauma for her and informs a lot if not most of her actions through the rest of the show

in season 2 she's feeling the weight of it more around the first year anniversary. steve trys to help by taking her to a party to forget for a little while and 'be stupid teenagers' for a night. a perfectly set up parallel already

the way the show wants it to go, we get the bullshit argument, they fight, allegedly break up at some point, and nancy sleeps with Jonathan. later steve tells her to go with him and we're supposed to read it as Steve stepping back so jancy can happen. we're supposed to be seeing this as a happy ending.

but with the material we're given this would have been the perfect place for an emotional repeat of season 1 for nancy. she and steve go to the party and pretend to be stupid teenagers for the night. but oh no! nancy lets lose too much, lets herself relax and drink and dance, and the next day her boyfriend's pissed. hes saying she said things she never remembered saying and its hurt him and she doesn't know what to do. and kids around school are talking about them breaking up at the party, and that fits with Steve's anger she saw, so they must've broken up right? it sucks, even if she wasn't in love with him, that'd be the worst way to break up with someone (especially if she's confusing platonic and romantic feelings or convincing herself it has to be romantic when she really just values him as a friend)

and then she doesn't have time to work it out, she needs to go with Jonathan to avenge barbs 'disappearance' to give her family closure. She's got a lot of conspiracy shit to do and its stressful. so when murray starts going off about how she's not really in love with steve, how she actually likes Jonathan and he seems to like her back. they finished a lot of the hard work with the conspiracy stuff, she can let her guard down and have a quick good night.

then the next day is chaos. demodogs and labs and will being possessed. It a rough fucking day. Steve tells her to go with Jonathan while they get the mindflayer out of Will, civil like they're on good terms so she does (and thank god she did because that was rough and they needed all the help they could get)

and then everything's fine again, with the upside down. and it looks like she handled things better this time, was about to relax occasionally and still made it through.

except apparently she and steve didn't break up. he thought it was just a few fights, that they put their shit aside for the apocalypse and now they can work things out.

and it could ruin nancy. a year later and she's still hasn't learned her lesson, that letting her guard down hurts the people she cares about, that relaxing and having fun makes her lose people. its her fault for the messy breakup with Steve and its her fault that barb is gone. she's the reason she's lost friends close to her, 2 for 2, and now she only has Jonathan left (and what do you know, season 3 has her conflict with Jonathan and in season 4 she's not let anyone else get truly close to her and fred still dies)

you see what i mean?? by having conflict magical resolve itself in the background we loose so much powerful, painful character drama for her. our girl who thinks she has to keep the world around her up solely on her shoulders because she can't handle the loss of her best friend in season 1. Nancy who desperately wants to be normal and have people she loves but keeps losing them, through factors both in and out of her control, but feels like everything has to be her fault just because some things were.

and to be fair, that story is still present in the show. its there and definitely compelling, but it could've been even more so. i feel like if maybe there was less 'nancy has to be a strong independent girlboss' in there (abd it's definitely there, they want to make a point of making her a Strong Woman Character so bad) and she was allowed to have mistakes acknowledged by the narrative, this is the direction it would've gone. She could've been an excellent example of well written women who are strong and awesome through their own right instead of the narrative trying to make us like her

[they-might-be-ultramen]

unclear if my thinking a lot about my ocs fucking animal style is because im getting hornier due to my testosterone and since i dont really do sex its manifesting through my characters, or if this would be happening anyway because i love rotating my characters in my head and for some of them horniness is a forgone conclusion. doesnt really matter either way, but i was just thinking about it. anyways back to thinking about gay elves

[spaciebabie]

you're like a celebrity to me. Is that weird? I put you on the same pedestal that actors and CEOs and stuff other people are put on. Am I normal? Am I normal, Spacie? I hope I'm not

AHAHAHAHHA??? im flattered! i dont think its weird per say, but i am definitely NOT famous. dont put me on that pedestal brah im literally like. just some guy shitting around on tumblr.com/dashboard

[collgeruledzebra]

could-be-nothing realization of the day that i came to while listening to 99% Invisible: kane and feels is sound designed like a documentary

[widevibratobitch]

laalalalala another vent post because i have no therapist to pay for listening to my bullshit