#i dont quite know what to do with it now but i guess it goes up on the wall
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Goodbye Little Sailor Man
2023, acrylic paint / oil pastel on canvas
Paint study
60cmx80cm (~23x31inch)
Photo reference taken from this backstage photo post by @mcelroyfamilystaff
I'm sorry for being such a weirdo but I think these photos are genuinely beautiful and invite to be interpreted in paint. Big learning and really challenging work. Kinda interesting color study.
I made grids and helping guides digitally and printed the guides on A4 paper with my office printer. Then used chalk to transfer the grids and lines onto the canvas and kept painting from there. There's some slight proportional issue nonetheless so its not fully identical to the photo ref.
#i dont quite know what to do with it now but i guess it goes up on the wall#going through the 3000 circles of deciding to quit your job i guess does that to you#mcelroys#im so sorry#griffin mcelroy#i swear its just this photo on its own where i go yeah i wanna paint this#idk the colors and lights are so interesting so i there was a challenge 😅#painting#acrylics#acryl#acrylic#traditional art#study#reference#partially traced to put down guides and grids via paper transferral
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...
#its sort of funny. i think my medication is working pretty well. i feel stable in a way i never really have before#is it the dopamine stablizer or is it my ion channels? whos to say. it doesn't matter. but it also doesnt change some things#the ways i think and react negativly to change. but it makes it easier to deal with. i still experience this strange dispaire on the#weekends or anytime im not working. i think the oddest thing is thst i dont think ive ever been this consistenly sad#not in a depressed sort of way. just a passing thoughts make me tear up sort of way. it doesnt feel out of control. it just feels like a#prelude to grief i guess. bc my mum is still in the hospital and its so hard to kno what that means from halfway across the country#my sisters are both home right now. they both live within 3hrs of where we grew up. one sister lives in the city my mom goes to for#treatment. so they have the opportunity to see her more than me. i dunno if they do tho. we dont really talk. i dont kno if they're as sad#as i am. if im overreacting bc i cant physically see what's happening. what the feeling is in the room. not that she would probably complain#shes the suffer in silence type. my dad keeps texting us pics of our shitty lil sunroom that hes redoing#to make my mum a lil sanctuary. he must be sad too. its his wife. hes staying with her in the hospital rn. i dunno its so weird#when i talk to my counselor she assumes i find out info thru calls or talk to my sisters abt it and i gotta b like nah we dont really talk#i get my info thru text. i havent talked to my parents on the phone in like a month. i dunno we just dont talk. so i dont kno how to reach#out and be like yo so whats up? shoulf i plan on coming home this summer for a bit?? like???#this is the disadvantage of leaving thr place where you grew up. probably when i finish my phd i should move closer to home#somewhere in the Appalachian mountains maybe. somewere in the eastern deciduous forrest. somewhere with thunderstorms.#but thats years from now. who knows what ill b doing. for now im just sad and tired and i dont quite kno what to do in the short or long#term bc im feeling the weight of my mental limitations rather intensely. but maybe im just being self limiting#whatever. i dont have a dead mum yet. shes not even on hospice care. things are just uncertain and dont look so hot#i just dont see how it can get better from here when chemo gave her secondary blood cancer and shes still full of tumors#i dont think im being that dramatic. it just objectively seems not great for survival#unrelated
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Because learning English phonetics... teaches you how to pronounce French names?
learning that apparently several hundred people have been pronouncing 'miette' as 'mighty' has actively worsened my day
#I've always pronounced it more like me-Et/me-yEt but I can absolutely see why people would get other pronunciations#including 'mighty' even if it's not what i personally probably would have guessed if I hadn't thought it was me-Et#I'm pretty sure if you followed phonetic rules for English it'd be pronounced meet/meat...#which granted is closer than mighty but *still*#also idk in my experience people whose first/only language is English do tend to recognize when a name is Probably Not English#and realize that our pronunciation/phonetic rules are unlikely to get us to the correct pronunciation and so we're left with guessing#at the rules of a language we probably don't know in the slightest#like I agree the us education system has many an issue#it was bad when I was in gradeschool and it's bad now#but as someone who was taught phonics. that shit did not teach us to pronounce non-English words and names#hell it didn't even teach us how to pronounce a BUNCH of english words and names like. come on now#do you know how many times we heard ''this word doesn't follow the rules''? (btw the answer is ''more often than we heard it DOES'')#yeah learning phonics is so important but learning and knowing The Rules doesn't mean learning and knowing exactly when to apply them#it's kinda a guessing game that you just... have to learn over time from experience on a word-by-word basis#(and yk. this ''explanation'' assumes most of the people voting are from the us and went to gradeschool in the us public system etc#which is entirely *possible* I guess but unless I've missed something that's quite an assumption)#public education system* (or other us education systems I guess. who knows what goes on in private and charter schools? I sure dont)#anyway.
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been wringing my hands about the concept of family therapy. scary stuff. like maybe it could help and we sure as hell need SOMETHING to change but i think it would be like taking a potato peeler to the soles of my feet
#look it probably works for a lot of ppl but every time i think about it as a solution for my Definitely Needs It family it's like. god no#it probably only works when everyone's willing to change and actually listen to each other#if i did it with my folks im worries they'd quit if they were challenged or talk shit about the therapist/methods afterwards#like im so worried the therapist would take their side and we'd be stuck giving in to them#only now with assurance from an expert that they're always right and we're wrong and ungrateful. not helpful!! negative progress#and if we tried to switch therapists my parents would be like oh you just can't accept responsibility 🙄🙄#you just wanted someone to tell you you didn't have to try or to coddle you or make us do what you want or whatever#aghhh it's so scary and it's not even on the table. no one wants this but i also think trying to mediate it myself would suck so fuckin bad#aughh. sorry i wanna write about it as like. a tags rant. here goes#my parents don't apologize for shit. ive legit seen it happen once. they justify and backpedal but they never acknowledge their bs#they treat the harm that comes from their methods with a sort of 'well what do you expect me to do about it?! (rhetorical)' vibe#like there is no way to improve. like the ability for parents to fail and be flawed means those things must be accepted uncritically#because they're trying and they have good intentions. but if they really wanted to help as they claim they would be willing to change#if you're trying to help someone and they tell you your actions didn't help or are hurting them you should change your methods so theyre#helped. but they operate on this assumption that their methods should always work and thud if they don't that we're too sensitive#'youre asking for too much' was kind of a major theme in my childhood is what im realizing#instead they justify and focus on intent or their kids' flaws (real or imagined). they want to change the reaction rather than the action#they dont want to help they just want the problem to go away. and quiet kids look like happy kids i guess#thing is i cant even cite that many manipulative things theyve said bc we all go quiet as soon as they use a disapproving tone#like they'll just be like 'skrunks >:/.' and that's it. i cant say anything. i know i wont be listened to and they fucking do it on purpose#theyre kinda shit at defending themselves but i can barely follow their lines of reasoning so it's so fucking hard to argue with them#it's also so unnurturing. why is us being unhappy or uncomfortable smth to blame on our failure n not smth you want to help with? wth#yk the thing about the Shut Down Tone is i recognize and resent it sometimes but it still makes me feel like im not giving them a fair shot#bc i dont even slightly challenge them much (& they dont have to say what they mean for us to cower) i feel like im misreading their tone#that im being too sensitive and thinking theyre being controlling for no reason. like im reading into it too hard and hating them when if i#pushed back they'd freely be good to me and change and be reasonable. but now it's becoming clearer that that's not the case bc they Do Not#and if i mention The Tone theyll just say im overreacting and that it's my fault for not sticking up for myself AGAIN!!!!!!#and it's so frustrating knowing what's going on and still having these doubts. i can't trust my gut or what i hear bc they might be right#they'll straight up lie or change their arguments or their story to get me to submit. am i being gaslit??? wtf#but i trust my (treated worse) brothers' accounts which helps. my parents brag about their parenting skills to us btw ✌️✌️
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adam is a criminal. the underwear kind, got new underwear? gone after a few uses. got regular underwear? also gone. you dont mind. but you do ask he gives each pair back about 2 weeks after kidnapping them. your poor babies, god knows what Adam does with them while they're not in your possession. actually do tell us, what does he do with them?
Panties Thief
A/N: Adam’s a perv, he’d totally do this.
Whenever (Name) goes to do her laundry, she notices she’s missing panties that she definitely remembers putting in the hamper. Two weeks later, Adam would give them back. (Name) had a pretty good idea of what he was doing with them, but Adam handed them back so casually she couldn’t call him out.
New pairs, old pairs, if they were worn, they were stolen.
It was Tuesday afternoon, one o’clock to be precise, and (Name) was headed home. She was never home around one, so Adam wouldn’t be expecting her. (Name) thought nothing of that fact until she walked up and into their room.
Adam was laying on the bed, a pair of her panties held up to his nose, jerking off. (Name)’s jaw dropped. She should be offended, disgusted even, but for some reason it was the hottest thing she’d ever seen Adam do.
“So that’s what you do with them,” she announced, making her presence known.
Adam jumped, shoving the panties under the pillows and sitting up to stare at (Name), wide-eyed. “W-what the fuck are you doing home?”
(Name) grinned. “Hiding them under the pillow? I saw you Adam.” Adam swallowed. (Name) approached him, pushing him onto his back on the bed and crawling on top of him. He wasn’t wearing his mask, to (Name)’s pleasant surprise.
“No mask?”
“Can’t fully smell with it,” Adam mumbled, embarrassed.
(Name) grinned, running her hands up his chest. “That’s fair. So often do you do this? I’m guessing quite often considering how many of my panties you take.”
Adam was looking anywhere but her. His dick was still out and half hard, and (Name) grabbed it. Adam choked. (Name) began pumping her fist and Adam moaned, quickly becoming fully hard again. (Name) smirked.
“You’ve been having all this fun without me.”
Adam scowled. “I only do it when you’re not here to fuck.”
(Name) let go of his dick, much to his dismay, but his disappointment was quickly dissipated when she began to tug down her pants and panties. When she was bare on her lower half, she climbed into Adam’s lap and straddled his dick.
Adam reached up and pulled (Name)’s shirt over her head before his hands snuck around her back and he unclipped her bra.
(Name) grinded down on his dick and Adam groaned, feeling how wet she was.
“Well I’m here for you to fuck now.”
Adam tossed the panties to the floor. He pushed (Name) off him and onto her back, covering her small frame with his large one, pinning her to the bed. He didn’t bother with foreplay, which he figured they’d technically already done.
(Name) was wet enough anyway.
He lined himself up with her opening and thrust in all at once. (Name) cried out and threw her head back. Her nails scraped down his back.
Adam began to roll his hips, his thrusts very quickly picking up in speed and intensity. (Name) moaned and whined with each thrust, one hand scratching Adam’s back and the other hand tangling in the hair at the back of his head.
The room was filled with the sound of skin slapping against skin, pants and moans. Adam grunted, hips slamming against (Name) as he pounded into her.
“I love you,” Adam panted. “I’m glad you’re home.”
(Name) giggled, out of breath. “And I’m glad I figured out what you do with all my panties.”
Adam chuckled breathily. “Whatever.” He thrust particularly hard and (Name) cried out, clenching around him. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
It didn’t take much longer for Adam’s thrusts to become sloppy and sporadic as he neared his climax. “Gonna fucking cum in you,” he mumbled against (Name)’s forehead. (Name) whimpered. “Please.”
Her neediness pushed Adam over the edge and with one final thrust he pushed all of himself into her and painted her womb white. (Name)’s tightening around him milked every drop from him as she came right after.
“Fuck,” Adam gasped, trying to catch his breath. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from (Name)’s heaving chest. He felt his dick twitch.
“Wanna go again?”
#hazbin adam#adam x reader#hazbin alastor#hazbin angel dust#hazbin charlie#hazbin husk#hazbin vaggie#hazbin vox#hazbin hotel#hazbin lute#x reader#hazbin valentino#hazbin lucifer#hazbin sir pentious#hazbin niffty#oneshots#oneshot#smut#perversity
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*During a particularly slow patrol or stakeout*
Steph: Soo, if you were to have a song as your theme, what song would you choose? Personally i think id be 'Applause' by Lady Gaga.
Damian: This is ridiculous, brown, i will not be part to such a foolish activity.
Steph: Dont be such a debby downer, brat. Have some fun once in your life.
Damian: *Scoffs*
Dick: I like this game! i-
Bruce: We're on an important mission, everyone. Keep the talk work related.
Steph: C'mon big guy, nothing's happening, and we're all close to falling asleep. If anything, this ensures we're attentive if anything happens.
Bruce: ...Very well. But keep your eyes on the target.
Dick: Will do! Anyways, as i was saying, i think id be 'Royals' by 'Lorde'!
Steph: Dick, i mean this in the nicest way possible but you are quite literally the closest thing there can be to modern-society royalty.
Dick: Yeah, thats why i like the song!
Tim: So you just never listen to the words?
Dick: I mean i never really close attention but is it really that much of a problem??
Duke: I mean, you are like, all of the things she mention she's never going to be.
Dick: Oh :(
Steph: *Snorts* Yeah, if anything youd be 'Candy' by Robbie Williams.
Tim: Hah, yeah.
Dick: Ok, i like the song but now im getting the feeling that its not a compliment.
Cass: Dumb but nice big brother :)
Damian: You do act quite like an empty headed buffoon at times, Richard.
Dick: What! No! Ok wait let me choose another song... ok, ill be 'Killer Queen' by Queen, ok?
Steph: Yeah i guess i can accept that. What about you, tim?
Tim, in a completely dead voice: 'What is love' by TWICE.
Duke: Uh...
Tim: I said what i said.
Duke: Ok... well, i like 'sunflower' by Post Malone.
Dick: Aaw, you are like a sunflower, thats so nice
Cass: You are very bright and warm, yes. Like sunshine
Duke: Thats the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.
Cass: I like 'The dog days are over' by Florence and The Machine
Tim: Thats... pretty much perfect for you.
Dick: Yeah, agreed.
Tim: So, baby brat, what about you?
Damian: I told you, i wont lower myself to such childish games!
Dick: Come on, little bat, for me?
Damian: I am not one to be swayed so easily, you fool!
Cass: Dont be mean, baby brother, and have fun. Please?
Damian:
Damian: Fine. I choose 'You should see me in a crown' by Billie Eilish. I would look very good in a crown.
Steph: Yeah, i dont know what i expected
Dick: What about you, Bruce?
Bruce: I dont listen to music.
Tim: Damn man, that sounds depressing, you must know a song or two
Bruce: I really dont know that many songs, Tim. Maybe you can choose for me
Dick: No! That defeats the purpose of the game, B, come on, just think about it for a second
Bruce: Mmm... I guess if i were to choose, 'Viva la vida' by Coldplay woul-
Jason, who has the comms frequency but never uses and isnt even on the same mission: Personally I'd be 'Fireworks' by Katy Perry
Dick: Jay! its so nice to hear you parteci-
Jason: Specifically the part that goes 'do you ever feel already buried deep, six feet underground but no one seems to hear a thing'
Dick: *softly* Jay, no.
#batfam#batman#bruce wayne#jason todd#red hood#dick grayson#nightwing#tim drake#red robin#spoiler#Stephanie brown#robin#damian wayne#cassandra cain#black bat#batboys
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Disillusioned
Summary : (this statement by @/exodusin) / Mabel finds you in Bills penthause but instead of escaping with her, you show her your true colors. And your new husband, Bill.
pairing: Bill Cipher x gn! evil! reader
tw: none, tell me if i should add
Mabel couldn't find Dipper. For twenty minutes she's been running around Bills piramid only to get the demon further away from her Grunkles. That worked out. Kinda. Now she couldn't find a way back and had him running after her and her brother. And now she lost him! She really hoped he was fine. Hearing a booming sound she turned to another corridor. This one was looking... different?
It was smaller and narrow, as if the walls were about to crush her trying to protect something further. On the end of it, she found grand traingle doors. She really hoped whatever was inside would be harmless enough to let her rest a second. She opened them, coming into a big luxurious room. It looked like some sort of a penthouse with an expensive cauch, a fireplace, chandelier and a-
"Oh! Mabel, hi!" - Wait, what? It was you! Y/N her cool older friend, the one who helped her out in numerous adventures, and the one who vanished, just some time before the start of Weirdmaggedon! She could't belive her own eyes!
"Y/N? What are you doing here! Has Bill kidnapped you and inprisoned? We were so worried!" The girl rushed to hug you. "We need to go! Bill is-"
"Go? Oh Mabes, why would we go anywhere?"
She took a step back. You looked the same as always. Just maybe more elegant? Her tired mind desperately searched for the explanation for the weird feeling she had right now.
"Y/N... what... what have you been doing since the start of Weirdmaggedon?"
"Oh, well, I was sitting here " you gestured around the luxurious room. You didn't seem to be panicked at all. Have you get used to the situation? " I've been quite bored, but overall I'm fine, really! I'm glad you're here to visit!"
"Visit? No! I'm here to defeat Bill! Have you seen what he did to the town? To the people?!"
Despite your face being frozen on a smile something in your eyes changed. You didn't answer immiediately, stepping back to a table nearby, pouring yourself a drink. You talked slowly, as if you were soothing a panicked animal cought in a trap.
"Oh yes. Trully a work of art. It took time to design all of this you know? Do you have a favorite part?"
She felt her stomach drop. She misheard you right? O-or you're just acting! Or under some weird demonic enchantment, you wouldn't say such a thing, right?
You smirked tilting your head. " Well... in my opinion, the top three things would be... hmm, the walking water tower - I know, I know, a boring choice, but it walks very funny and-
"Y/N, listen-" you ignored her, continuing as she wasn't even there "- the second would be bubbles, very creative, colorful and fun, you know? Especially yours, it was so cute it made me a bit jealous! It's a shame I didn't get to visit tho. Yes I know, sorry, don't look at me like that, I will do that next time ok? Now! Drumrolls! the first place goes toooo-"
You looked at her as if wanting her to guess. In response she gave you a mixed look. It seemed like you clearly needed some help, but there was no time to sit around.
"I dont know, what is it?"
" ME " she jumped quickly pointing a grappling hook at the intruder. It was Bill, again in his yellow tamer form, standing awfuly close to you and holing-
" Dipper!"
"Nu-uh Shooting star! You're not playing with that toy anymore!"
At the snap of his fingers her weapon dissapeared. He grabbed her and before Mabel could move she found herself in the same hand where Dipper was trapped in. But you? You just stood there.
"Y/N! Help us!" her brother shauted. You only responded with a piting look in your eyes. Until your attention moved over to the demon getting closer.
"Hey toots! Check this out - a pegasus dropped it off today!" he handed you a card. From where the twins where placed they could see a drawing of the pyramid and a short text which Bill read out laud:
"It's a "I missed you, B.", and yes, it's me, I'm the B, also there was no pegasus, also there was me."
He blinked at you.
You gasped and smiled, your cheeks got darker and your hands tauched where your heart was supposed to be.
"Oh Billy! You're such a romantic!"
Dipper looked at you with disdtain "You just didn't say that."
"Oh but they did! That's my spouse after all!" you both laughed at shocked faces of the children. It was funny how none of the Pines realised they had a traitor among them. Now everything started to make sense. How you claimed to love spending time in the shack. How your face always lingered on Dippers journal. How you never smiled at Stanford but was always calming him down after a fight with his broher. How they all could always count on you, to take care of the kids on their silly adventures.
"How could you!" Mabel felt her eyes getting watery. She really liked you. She trusted you!
You shrugged lightly smiling. " Oh dear, don't be sad, it was always the plan. I'm sorry you have to be entangled in all of this"
"No you're not."
"Ha. True, I'm not. You know me so well kid."
"Why. Why did you do all of this? We were friends-"
"Oh HA HA HA, they already have friends kid! And money, fame, riches, infinite power! And the handsome ol' me! What else would they need?"
"An entire world to rule?" - You kissed Bills eye while handing him a drink "Oh, and I don't want you to take it the wrong way, you know? But i hate you. I thought I could get over it. But I feel sooo tired. And it's just the time to split up! I mean, honestly, you and your grunkles had lot's of chances to get to the right side of history but you decided not to. Now you pay. Tell my thanks to Ford, I would never meet the love of my life, if not for his stupidity." your smile dropped.
"Y/N you can still fix this!"
"As if!" Bills form grew larger while he opened the door "See you sweetcheeks, I will get that equasion in no time! Gotta disassemble some kids molecules!"
You stayed there smiling, waving back at Bill.
That was the last time they saw you.
#gravity falls#thetalkingcrow#bill cipher x reader#bill cipher x you#gravity falls x reader#gn reader
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Hello granddad!! Really enjoyed the new episode by the way :D I just wanted to ask something, I dont know if you already answered this so I'm sorry for bothering you if you have D:
Do you have a particular interest in nuclear physics? I'm wondering because when I watch ION it seems to me like you must be very passionate about it as well, either that or your just very good at researching (or making stuff up this sounds legit to people who dont know anything about physics, like me! /j), but it sounds like you know a considerable amount! Maybe it just seems like that to me because I don't understand physics at all :P
I really love cracklin!! So much!!! I've felt like I was too naive and childish for most of my life, I felt weak, pathetic, i cried nearly every day and my feelings of self hatred were only solidified by the people around me. And even though I act MUCH differently now and am in fact quite crude (I am much like a bird squawking outside your window that refuses to shut up!!!) and say uncomfortable things, I'm still regarded as naive and dumb sometimes! The thing Sylvia and cracklin have going on feels very similar to MANY friendships I've had with girls my age. I liked school very much and liked to work, so it made them angry that I managed to be "so stupid and so smart at the same time" (quoted directly from something a girl said to me when I was in middle school). I feel very seen.
I also want to ask if you have a particular interest in object shows, or if you just happened to choose to make your show an object show by coincidence? Object shows are my special interest and I LOVE how your show goes against (almost) everything standard for an object show. Your show is absolutely unique and there's nothing like it out there! I'm sure you will inspire many young creators to make their object shows more serious and complex, deviating from just the typical competition show. In my eyes something is qualified as an object show when there are objects (or non human characters) and the creator considers it an object show, so I love how versatile the title can be! Your designs communicate a lot about the characters and that's SO uncommon!!!! I love it!!!!! You inspire ME!!!! The art is also BEAUTIFUL, really abnormal to see in object shows, most of the time very little detail is put into it, but your backgrounds feel so ALIVE
Have a good day! :]
☢️ As soon as I saw this secret message, the words flashed through my mind: “this letter is very autistic, perhaps it was created by an autistic person.” ☢️ I love long opinions with lots of details and sincere emotions, thank you for this text, I was very happy reading it!
☢️ Yes, you guessed it - nuclear physics (especially everything related to the operation of Nuclear Power Plants) has been my special autistic interest for about 5 years now. I love everything about it. In fact, I am absolutely bad at the exact sciences, but the dance of nuclear energies fascinates me and takes my breath away! I order manuals on nuclear reactors for myself and read them with great pleasure, waving my hands. I often go to a coffee shop to read there by the window with a cup of coffee ^^
☢️ I created ION during the most terrible period of my life, and this project was the only thing that held me while anxious depression was rapidly developing and consuming me into some bottomless black abyss. So I put my whole soul, all of myself and what I love into ION, I made this project my mirror. ☢️ It is very important for me to see how this story touches the hearts of other people, I scream with delight if some neurodivergent people recognize themselves in Cracklin! This is extremely important to me.
☢️ Object shows are not my special interest, but I was very surprised and intrigued by this genre of web animation. At first, I did not like the concept of an object show and I could not understand why people were watching it … and then something switched inside me and I really wanted to create my own experimental Object show. To create it entirely myself. To make an author's project that will become a part of me. I didn't even hope that ION would be liked by anyone else, I posted 1 episode with the thought that I was doing it only for myself. And now I am happy as a rainbow in the sky, reading so many kind comments and support! Thank you very much
#ion object show#investigation of object nuclearity#i.o.n.#object shows#ион обджект шоу#и.о.н.#cracklin ion#object show community#special interest#autistic character#osc community#objects#object show#osc
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I want to see something where Bada gets idol!reader pregnant and their relationship is public. I dont have a plot just want to see something cute. Maybe throw in some drama cause why not
Down bad bada is a must
What A Life. | Bada Lee x Reader
°SUMMARY:
"𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎."
"𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝙸'𝚟𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚐𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚗."
"𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎."
"𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝙸'𝚟𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐."
"𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎."
~ 𝙹𝚑𝚎𝚗𝚎 𝙰𝚒𝚔𝚘 - 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚢 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚢 (𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝙻𝚒𝚏𝚎)
°CW:
𝚏𝚕𝚞𝚏𝚏, 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚜𝚝, 𝚐!𝚙 𝚋𝚊𝚍𝚊, 𝚝𝚘𝚡𝚒𝚌 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚊𝚗𝚢, 𝚝𝚘𝚡𝚒𝚌 𝚏𝚊𝚗 𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚎 (𝚛. & 𝚋𝚊𝚍𝚊), 𝙳𝙸𝙳 𝙽𝙾𝚃 𝙿𝚁𝙾𝙾𝙵 𝚁𝙴𝙰𝙳‼️ 𝚂𝙾𝚁𝚁𝚈 𝙵𝙾𝚁 𝙼𝙸𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙺𝙴𝚂‼️
There is a lot to being an idol. From having some sort of talent, just simply being a pretty face to look at to strict diets and contracts, hectic overloaded schedules, and toxic groups and companies, but there is something that is expected of you is an idol. Can you guess what it is...
Being the only one for your fans, a parasocial relationship if you will. You are supposed to stay pure and innocent for your fans, no sex, no relationship, no children, no drinking or smoking, no potty mouth. You are supposed to keep your fans as happy as possible, whether it makes you uncomfortable or not. Just do it with a smile, they say. Well, so much for not "breaking" the "idol rules."
You may have screwed up a few months into your solo career as an idol. Your relationship with your choreographer, Bada Lee, was exposed by fucking sasaengs and then was quickly picked up by Dispatch, fucking snitch. There was some hate with comments on your social media like,
"Unnie, you are not ashamed for abandoning us like this?"
"Well... there goes her career."
"Noona, a woman, seriously?!?!? Maybe you should get a real MAN?!?!"
"Wow, so we fuck our choreographers now."
"STAY AWAY BADA, YOU DIRTY CUNT!!!"
But despite the hate, you and Bada decided to go public with your relationship, which gained quite a bit of support with comments from both your fanbases,
"Come on, guys, just admit it. They are cute as fuck."
"Love it!!!"
"Both of my worlds are colliding. What the actual fuck?!?!?."
"My parents are so cute!!!"
"Made for each other fr."
"Look at how they look at each other."
You both were happy. Your careers were skyrocketing, and you two still had somewhat of a supportive fanbase together and solo. Your company were somewhat supportive but still made you apologize to fans to regain their trust again.
"So what you are telling me is that I have to apologize for falling in love?" You scoffed as you sat across from your manager and a couple of members of your staff. "Are you hearing yourself right now?"
"Well, ma'am, you signed a contract that states everything regarding the dating ban as well as the consequences that may follow if broken." Your manager said, pushing the contract towards you as well as pen and paper to follow. "It's there in black and white, ma'am."
"So what's next? Are you gonna make me apologize for getting married and starting a family, too? You said as you began to write your heartfelt apology to your fans.
"Well, let's just hope that doesn't happen, right?" Your manager said as he leaned back in his seat with a smirk on his face. "You are our money maker, sweetheart, so we kind of need you. Tell your bitch to wrap that shit up, okay?"
"Yeah, whatever." You scoffed as you pushed the pan and paper back towards him, standing from your seat as you made your way to the door. "Also, if I were you, I'd watch what the fuck I say since ya know, I am your money maker."
"So what do we do with it?"
"Bada, you don't have to do anything. I have to handle this."
"It should be fairly easy, right?"
Bada was quite confused about the whole situation. It's like, at one moment, you were perfectly fine and then you end up sick at the simple scent or taste of a food. At first you both thought it was your menstrual cycle until you realized you were a whole two weeks late. It can't be, right? There's no way... Is there?
"Okay, I'll just read the instructions and just go for it. What's the worst that could happen?" You grabbed the bag of pregnancy test and made your way to the bathroom with Bada hot on your heels. "Baby, just let me take the test, okay? Alone, please?"
"Yeah, of course. If you need me, just call." Bada said, kissing your forehead before backing up allowing you to walk into the bathroom. "I'll be right here, okay?"
You nodded as you closed the door behind you. Nerves began to rush over your body as you pulled the test from the bag and began to read the instructions.
"Okay, step one, remove the plastic cap and use immediately. Step two, hold the absorbent tip in urine stream for five seconds. Step three, replace cap and lay test flat. Step four, wait 1 to 3 minutes for results." You read, taking deep breath after the mouth full. "Alright, seems simple."
After five tests, constant hand washing and the struggle of just trying to pee on the stick, you were finally done and now is the even more nerve-wracking part, waiting for the results. The three minutes seemed like hours, but it was time, and to be honest, you were scared shit less. If these tests come out positive, what will this mean for both of your careers?
"Bada..." You called out for your girlfriend on the other side of the door. "Come in here now."
"What does it say? Baby, why are you crying?" Bada said as she rushed into the bathroom to see you sitting on the floor with a test in your hands as tears stream down your cheeks.
Bada looked over to the other tests on the counter. Her hands flew over her mouth as she let out gasp. "Positive... it's positive."
Bada sat next to you, wrapping her arms around your body as you sob into her shirt, still gripping to test in your hand. You are pregnant, and there's no going back now. It's not that you don't want children, you do, but not this early and not like this. You wanted to getting married and be settled, no more idol life just you, Bada and your baby living somewhere discreet and outside the public eye.
"What are we gonna do, Bada? What about my career? What about your career? The fans? The company?" You began to play out everything in your head of what would happen if the public found out. All the backlash and more negative comments. "I'm scared, Bada."
"Hey, it's you and I, okay? Don't worry about all of that. If this was not meant to be, then it would have never happened." Bada lifted your head as she wiped your falling tears, gently caressing your cheeks. "It's okay to be scared, baby. This is new for both of us. We're gonna take it one step at a time. Together."
You smiled weakly as you leaned into her touch, nodding in agreeance. "I love you."
"I love you too." Bada said, pulling you into a kiss. "We got this."
"We got this."
°AN:
Ummm... I really hope you enjoy this, and I am sorry for the VERY late response. Enjoy, tho!!! 💙
#bada lee#bada lee smut#bada lee imagine#bada lee x reader#bada x reader#street woman fighter x reader#team bebe#street woman fighter 2#swf2
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𝐁𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐋𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫!𝐄.𝐖
a/n : so just wanna say this is my first time writing in a while so i hope its somewhat decent, i’ve noticed the tlou community on tumblr has thinned out quite a bit so im kinda just grasping at straws here but for those who do decide to read thank you and i hope you like it even though its very short and poorly written 🤍
warnings: none i think? not proofread
𖦹 you’d worked at the bar for almost half a year now, being a sophomore in college who lives out of state you needed the extra money and your friend had started working at ‘ cherry bomb ‘ a few months before you did
𖦹 you made decent money hourly, but with usually working Fridays as its the only day that works the best paired with shirts that show just enough cleavage to make amazing tips as well as the vibes of the small little local dive bar made it more enjoyable than most would expect
𖦹 you didn’t notice her at first as it was a particularly busy night. it was just you and your coworker Clint working the bar so your mind was filled to the brim with drink orders and strange pickup lines from old dudes.
𖦹 she noticed you almost immediately however
𖦹 it was her first time at this specific bar or a real bar in general, dina and jesse had dragged her along saying she needed to get laid and be a normal human being for once but of course they coupled up and went straight to the dance floor
𖦹 she rolled her eyes, instinctively knowing she wasn’t going to have a fun night she went up to the bar to sip on a glass of whiskey until dina and jesse wore themselves out, somehow finding an empty stool, she saw you pacing back and forth, pouring and mixing different concoctions and putting them in front of their designated orderers, all while smiling and providing great customer service, being sure to push out your chest for the rich old douchebags who think they might get lucky by tipping well and writing their number on a napkin after making lewd comments about every women in their line of sight.
𖦹 finally, after being so distracted with all of the drink orders and tabs being opened and closed, Clint taps you on your shoulder as you close out a customer “hey, can you take this chicks order, shes sitting on my side of the bar but like 6 people just walked in”. you sigh before begrudgingly saying yes and go over to his side of the bar to see, a drop dead gorgeous auburn haired woman right around your age who is setting off gaydar.
𖦹 when you approach her and introduce yourself her throat goes dry and immediately forgets how to act like a human being. she cant even hear the words coming out of your mouth, yet she loves the way they sound and she especially loves the view your shirt gives her. you have to ask if shes alright to get her out of her haze and when she snaps her head up and stumbles over her words trying to save this extremely awkward social predicament, you cant help but let out a light chuckle which causes her to mutter out a small ‘sorry..’ as her face turns red
“its okay honey, just tell me what you need and ill have it over here as quick as possible”
“uhm.. can you just make a uh whiskey? or well i guess you guys dont really make the whiskey huh hahah..”
𖦹 she stopped trying to make small talk after that despite wanting to hear more of your sweet voice but decided watching you from afar gave off a better vibe.
𖦹 eventually, people started to dissipate and more stools became empty and soon enough dina and jesse were tapping her on the shoulder telling her they were ready to leave and just ordered the uber. she let them know she still had to pay and close out and with the uber still a decent 10 minutes away they opted to wait outside while she did so. she called you over to ask if she can close out her tab and pay, even though she barely drank half of her whiskey.
𖦹 you smiled at her before walking away and coming back with her receipt and her credit card, as she signed it and left a tip that was more than her drink, she handed it back to you to which you saw the tip and thanked her dearly for leaving you so much money before retreating to the back room where you but before she could leave she noticed a napkin in front of her, a napkin that had a phone number written on it with a note reading ‘ don’t be shy, call me ❤️’ .
turns out rich guys do get lucky.
#𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐬 🐞✏️#ellie williams#ellie tlou#tlou#tlou fanfiction#ellie the last of us#the last of us#tlou2#ellie x reader#ellie willams x reader#tlou game
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the company i work for decided that its switching from the german formal "You"(Sie) to the informal "you" (Du) in all of our websites so now we have to scour the entire database to change it and i quite frankly hate that, not just bc the unecessary extra work but especially bc its such a weird and unecessary change
i bet its bc everything here is getting englishfied (both literally and culturally it feels like, when my new boss talks its half in english bc every second german word is just replaced by an english one despite there being perfectly fine words for it in german too, its so annoying) and bc they want to sound more personal in hopes of getting more clients bc 'company is your fwiend uwu!!', i know this here is the amercian tm site so you wouldnt understand really but i do not want to be greeted with 'du' by companies, no, thats too personal, you dont know me and im not giving you my data, stay away!!
i guess thats how i would describe it .. the formal you is like a polite distance, like someone you dont know staying outside your personal space, but when its the informal 'you' it feels invasive unless i told you you can call me that, and that goes double for companies
maybe its a small thing that doesnt seem important but i cant stand it, im just a little part time worker doing data work so i got no say in it but the companies founder also announced hes giving his post to his kids some time ago so ...... since then theres been alot of changes and new projects that solely aim to imitate whats popular and whats done by other companies, despite ours being one that is, or used to be, intentionally different, like, that was the POINT, but i guess chasing trends is just too appealing for CEOs
#ganondoodles talks#personal#rare personal rant#theres more and more changes that feel so weirdly forced#like man#i thought being different was the whole point#like climate and ethics are .. or were .. the core idea and now i guess its just fine to do whatever conventional companies are doing#yeah woohoo lets also do an app thing that forces people to sign up if they want reasonable prices!#smartphones the standard everwhere!#who needs anything physical if you can put it in an a phone so syphon off data directly out of people fingertips!! yea!!!#lets use AI pitcures bc we refuse to hire more graphic desingers and they are jsut so overworked uwu#climate? ethic? whats that#argh#sorry this needed to get out#recently had a stupid conversation with a coworker bc i asked them why we are okay with AI shit now when it goes against what this-#company was presumably founded on#and he was rly defensive and said welll we dont have time and its cheap and also maybe we should got WITH the time#like that last thing especially pissed me tf off#but i cant afford to lose this job#im starting to hate it more though so the dream of being able to stay like this might not be real#i cant get a job in this place that is as nice to my mental health so idk man#i wish i was good enough at merch and online stuff so i could live of that#but even trying to find out how taxes work on that stuff is a nightmare to me
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hi !! can you do a gideon graves x male!reader who owns a flowershop? (if you dont do male readers thats ok lol, gn!reader is good too)
Better than Any Boquet
(a Gideon Graves x male flowershop owner! reader)
EEE MY FIRST REQUEST !! (TYSM ANON IM LITERALLY SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS) ALSO I DO ALL GENDER READERS !! SO MALE READER ISNT A PROBLEM AT ALL !!! ^_^ (ALSO I WILL SAY THAT THIS SUUUUUPER LONG. I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT ANY SHORTER BUT PLS DONT BLAME ME IM BARELY STARTING 🙁 ) BUT I RLLY DO HOPE U ENJOY BC THIS HONESTLY TOOK ME SO LONG TO PUT TOTHER. BUT THANK U AGAIN !!! <3333 (also this isnt proofread so)
Gideon had been acting..strange lately. The league noticed, his employees noticed, even he noticed ! But, nobody could seem to pinpoint what exactly it was.
He had been going out more, being a little bit less harsh on certain people, and the biggest thing people noticed was the amount of flowers around now. Of course nobody dared to ask, heavens no ! But still, it was strange. It’s not like he was a big fan of the flowers himself, but for some reason he had so many around.
Eventually, it had started as a routine. Day after day he would do the exact same thing ! Saying he needs to go do something ‘important’ out, taking his leave, and ending up in the local flowershop. But why ? Its not like he was there for the flowers, no. He had a better reasons.
He walks in, his mind somewhere else before hearing something that completely snapped him out of it. A simple, “Good morning, Mr, Graves!”
< Thats > what he was here for.
The nice owner, thats what he was here for! How could we forget? How could he forget such a nice boy, the same boy who helps him every day no matter how many questions he asks or how many times he ends up repeating them. He even remembered his name! Not by the fact that he’s THE Gideon Graves, but by the fact that he comes in every day to his shop !
Will he ever admit its for him? Maybe later. But right now? Certainly not ! He can’t lose such a ‘friendship’ with this lovely boy he’s met ! For now, he simply comes in, looking for him at the desk in the front. Asking things such as “How do I take care of these?” or “What type of flowers would go best with this event ?” . Simple things to hide the fact that he’s only there to see him and to hear him talk.
After about an hour of mindless questions and small talk, he comes home, once again with a boquet of flowers in hand. He couldn’t help it ! He HAD to buy flowers every time he’d go in there, or he’d leave feeling a bit bad. So, there he goes, grabbing another empty vase and putting some water in it, then placing the flowers inside.
He sighed, looking around at all the flowers he now had. How long could he keep this up ? How long could he push his feelings for this boy away and just keep going and buying flowers, never making a move?
It honestly didn’t take long, he was running out of room for flowers and was so head over heels he couldn’t help himself anymore.
Though, for the first time he couldn’t help but feel a bit afraid. Would you like him? I mean yeah, he does have quite the name and ego, not to mention the billions he has in cash, but would you really find him attractive? He guessed he’d just have to find out.”
He spent about a week thinking about this.
Infact, he spent the whole time trying to distract himself, he had forgotten to go to the flowershop. After the week, he had finally decided to go say something. Thats when he remembered. He spent the whole week away from YOUR presence after being there non-stop for a few months!
Now he was really worried. He probably made you sick thinking something must have happened since he stopped coming for a whole week!
So, off he went! Sprinting down the street to the flowershop, holding on to his glasses for life. His plan? Say everything through a letter. He couldnt get himself to say it to your face, no matter how big of an ego he had.
He comes in, pushing the door open, almost falling over as he catches his breath before looking up. And there you were, making direct eye contact with him as you out new fresh flowers in a certain section.
“Mr. Graves! There you are! I was wondering where you’d been.” You say, giving him that same, sweet smile.
“Please..call me Gideon.” He says, closing the door behind him as he comes in entirely. “I have something..a bit more important for you this time.” “Anything! What do you need, Gideon?” He liked how you had listened without a question.
“I need a boquet of roses, the best ones you’ve got, and I need you to put this letter in there. But, I’d like you to read it first.” He says, handing the note to him. “I need these by 5 p.m today, and I’d like for you to write me a reply on the letter of what you think.”
With that he mutters a “Thank you” and runs out quickly, not even giving you a chance to respond.
You stand there, a bit dumbfounded. But, there was no need to go chase him down and question him. It seemed simple enough. So, you grab the roses, picking the best ones as he’d asked. Then, the letter.
You grab the letter, opening it slowly, then is when you get met with something..suprising.
“Sorry about the leave, I couldn’t be here for this. All these visits were never about the flowers, it was about you. I wanted to get closer, but never knew how. I’ve liked you for all these months, and never knew how to truely say it. You were always too kind, and quite the handsome man too, giving me that smile every day I walked in, no matter how clueless I was about anything. Especially the flowers. But you always listened to me. But, I do love you and everything you do a lot. And I would love to have you by my side. Because to me, you’re better than any boquet.”
#gideon graves x reader#gideon graves#scott pilgrim x reader#scott pilgram vs the world#scott pilgram takes off#x reader stories#fluff#??? idk#i love gideon#thank u sm anon#writer#new writers on tumblr#vancesrambles
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As I work on my college assignments that I have missed due to being sick I can't help but think *damn* I would absolutely hate being transported to another world due to all my responsibilities. Like, even if it was that zero time occurring between getting back home I wouldn't want that, because fuck what if time did pass? What if I got fired from my job or missed on rent and all my stuff got thrown out of my apartment?? I love the idea of being away from my responsibilities but I hate having to go back to more and more things I have to more things I have to make up or have just missed.
Anyway, my brain suddenly attached this to a reader who got stuck in the linked universe. The emotions they would go through because their mind isn't stuck on the past or present but in the future. What if they had pets? Who'd take care of them? How would they pay their bills if they got stuck in an alternate universe? It's a sudden absence of these things that really trip them up because they had so much to do and now it's all gone. They can actually live now. But also they weren't built to live life outside of the weird society we have. How can they learn to live if the way they'd been living was nothing but a mental ladder to keep up with. How can they keep going knowing that back home there are important events and people and animals that they are missing out on.
-✒️ (Sorry for the long ask I'm an a very existential mood rn)
Sorry this is such a late reply!! I've had a "fanfic author curse" kinda year tbh, so I'm just now getting back into my hobbies :/
(i just got so burnt out by life i wasn't even in the mood to play the video games, let alone touch my blogs/write for them :( which is sad bc i love talking to you guys /gen)
So, I hope this late response is okay, and college and things these days are going better for you anon!!
_
BRO RLLY DROPPED MY WORST FEARS IN MY MAIL BOX ON A GODDAMN?? WEDNESDAY EVENING??? 😭😭 /LH
NO but SERIOUSLY this is genuinely a fear ive had in realistic isekai scenario situations,
So for like a year, maybe 2 now? Ive been obsessively consuming "isekai/reincarnation/transmigration anime" or this trope that somehow someway a character is misplaced from their original timeline, maybe just mysteriously yoinked/died/possessed another body in a diff universe, whatever, either way theyre There now, in a diff universe. And animes consistently gloss over this transitional period, that i can see real ppl actually having, to just sort of accept and move on, of course yo get the plot rolling.
But i guess theres just not quite enough sort of nitty-gritty isekai content yet for anyone to get have finally made an isekai genre thing that really goes on the other side of the spectrum, where the MC is like, well, THIS^^^
Like unless ur actually a hermit, youve either pushed away all ur family anf friends or theyve passed away, and you dont have a pet, pr whatever/whoever else,
ive learned after sort of coming out of teen years/rlly long depressive episodes that, Someone will always notice you. Theyll notice youre gone, and theyll miss you.
Like ppl hit u with that angsty, "nobody cares abt me" and then when u realistically sit them down like, "okay. What about your favorite teacher? What about your best friend? What about your online friends who will never see you log on again? What about your dog?"
Like yeah, who will take care of your dog?? Becaue where im at in life, if my sibling dies, ive got no one to care about my old girl, my kitty Mia <3 whos loved me since i was 12 😭
So, ive been actually wanting to fill in somewhat this gap in isekai genre by sort of expanding on it, i mean to be honest fanfiction is the only media ive seen thats gotten close to tackling this, with any amount of realism/emotional depth it deserves.
i hope u found this any amount of satisfying response, i probably would take this is in either a complete horror fashion/tragic scenario (which i don't write that often tbh) or a sort of "angst with a happy ending" like MC/reader worrying freaking out abt homeworld but there's a portal to let you go between worlds or smth
Peace out ✒️,
🌙📁
(i found a file emoji - how do we feel abt it??)
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Could we get some angst like where fem!reader and dallas get into an argument and/or go on a break but they can’t stand being away from each other and do the whole confession and kiss in the rain cliche?
Mwah mwah chefs kiss love this i dont know how to cw so uhh fem reader?? use of nickname doll??? fight??? idk bro
It was raining. Hard. The soft pitter-patter of the droplets on the window reminds you of reality everytime you start drifting away.
“I don’t understand, who do you take me for?! An idiot?!” You seethed, knuckles turning white from clenching them too hard. “No, you’re not an idiot, you’re a bitch, that’s what you are.” Dally says pointing at you. He was equally as mad, although maybe for a less justified reason. You had seen him hanging around some red-head. It started as a simple question, but one thing led to another and now it was a full blown argument. “You don’t let me have any fun! No parties, no chicks, nuthin’!” He angrily stated. “We’re in a relationship, Dal! There is no chicks! No parties! Oh my God! Can you use your brain for like a minute and think about how I feel!” You say, putting your face in your hands. Dallas gives you a look before shaking his head.
“That’s it, we’re done.” He reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a cancer stick and a lighter. “Good riddance, toxic asshole” you huff, crossing your arms over your chest as he leaves.
You replay the fight in your mind, turning it over like a coin in your hand. Was I in the wrong? You think to yourself. Hell no. You affirmed yourself, if Dallas didn’t show up with an apology, you didn’t need it anyways. There’s a sharp crack against your window that startles you out of your self assurance. Another crack makes you look up. On the third crack you catch what it is. A pebble being thrown at the window. You look down at your lawn trying to catch a glimpse of who would be stupid enough to throw pebbles at your window during a storm. Dallas. Of course. Dallas was stupid enough. You quickly open the window, forcing it open quickly. A pebble wizzes by your face and you shoot Dally an unimpressed look. “What do you want, Dallas,” You say. Please, don’t stand in the rain, you’ll catch a cold. Your mind betrays you, you still care about him. “Let’s talk.” He say, voice slightly shaking, although you don’t know if its because of the cold or because he hasn’t seen you in forever. “You’re not stepping foot into my house while you're soaking wet.” His lips quirk up at that, there’s the girl he knows. “Would you like to come down then?” You make a show of mulling it over, although you already know the answer. The jacket is already in your hand by the time you're down the stairs and reaching for your keys. You quickly slip it on and rush out of the house. The rain soaks you before you’ve even reached Dal, the wind picking up speed and the rain turning into heavier droplets. He stands taller than you, by quite a bit actually, but his shoulders sag when you reach him. There’s a few seconds of silence, except for the torrent of rain that was battering both you and him. “I miss you.” He says, quietly. “That’s sweet.” There was a pause before Dally took a deep breath. “I’m so sorry. I messed up big time.” “You seem to do that a lot” You interject. He gives you a small chuckle. “Yeah, I guess I do. But I’m so sorry, really. It’s kind of hard adjusting to a ‘relationship’. I just thought that I could get a head start if..” his voice goes quiet, “if you ever decided to leave me like Sylvia. I thought I could prove I was a tuff guy. I’m not tuff, not really. Especially when it comes to you. I really hate that I’m turning soft or whatever..” He looked up at you, his usually harsh eyes were unexpectedly innocent. “Dallas, you can’t keep thinking that I’m going to morph into Sylvia. I’m not Sylvia, you’ve got to understand, you can’t keep letting this front our relationship.” You hugged your jacket tighter around you. “You’re right, you're not Sylvia, you’re so much more, so much better than she will ever be.” and before you could react his hands moved to your face and he pulled you in. The kiss was, dare I say, “magical”, resparking feelings that you had tried to put out for the whole time Dally was missing from your life. You pulled away quickly. “Please, doll, I’m so sorry for everything, I’m ready to be a better boyfriend, don’t pull away from me.” He nearly sobs. You roll your eyes and take your keys from out of your jacket pocket. “As much as I love the ‘kiss in the rain’ cliche, it’s fucking cold out here Dal,” you smile at him, taking his hand. He wraps his arm around your neck pulling you in again. His hand slips into yours and you realize how warm it is in his arms.
#shroomsroom#clara'sroom#dallas winston x reader#the outsiders x reader#dally winston x reader#dallas winston x read angst#dally winston x reader angst
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toxic thoughts with connie<33
tw toxic relationships/lowkey abuse?? | connie grabs you by your hair n threatens ya | mean connie☹️☹️
thinkin about connie n you being in a toxic lil on and off relationship. calling it quits every other day cuz youre just so bad for eachother.
you guys are screaming n throwing shit at eachother every chance you get. but its never your fault, no its always connies.
“youre a fuckin idiot (y/n),” he takes another drag from the blunt in his hand, “‘nd you’ve got one more time to raise your voice at me before i come over there and beat the shit outta you.”
its just a threat. an empty fucking threat, you know it is, but glancing up at him shirtless, muscles bulging with nothing but his plaid blue boxers on and a mean glare on his face. you cant help that chilling shiver that goes down your spine.
“m’not—dont call me that!”
“maybe than, lets see…” he lets out a mocking loud laugh, “dont fucking act like one?” you hate how he wants to make you cry. how he wants to see you act a mess. how he does everything in his power to upset you. and you hate he he almost always wins. always pulls a reaction out of you.
you feel the tears spill over your cheeks before you can even try n hold em in and you do everything in your power to not just flop down on his clean grey carpet and roll around and curse him. thats what connie springer does to you.
“‘m so fuckin done with you,” you pull up the strap of the lightpink nightgown silk dress connie gifted you as a im sorry for fucking up, again gift that just flops right back off your shoulder, “nd m’serious hic this time, you wont every hear from me again.”
bullshit. you know its bullshit. and it pains you to admit, but you dont think you’ll ever truly be done with connie springer.
connie sits up at that. intrigued. “oh really?” he’s putting his joint out in the ass-shaped ashtray he stole from jean and scratching his hickey covered neck (from guess who) and you can tell hes not taking you seriously. he never does.
his tone is mocking when he huffs out, “go ‘head, y’know where the fucking door is dum-dum.” he’s grabbing the remote, just about to turn on somethin other than the lame shit playing on tv before your throwing one of your bunny slippers directly at his face.
atleast you tried hitting direct. it barely grazes his ear but youre still satisfied when you see his scrunched up face.
and you know hes real mad. his handsome face is turning red at the minute and hes grabbing the slipper from his side before heading towards you.
you try to get away quick, little feet making it maybe two steps out the room before hes grabbin you by the hair and pulling you towards the ground. “ow—connie,” here come the tears again, “s-stop..! let go of me!”
“stop all that fucking crying before i really give you some shit to cry about,” hes letting go of your hair and turning around before your shoving him from behind, trying to get even. “dont fucking touch me! i dont fucking care—” he cuts you off, “shut the fuck up. my gosh.” and hes turning around, grabbing you by your now scrunched up nightgown and pulling you real close to his face.
he can see how upset you are. the tears streaming down your puffy face, your brows all furrowed and all the hiccups coming from your swollen, wobbly lip. sometimes yeah, he does feel bad for how he treats you. the random disappearing days when he knows how much you depend on him, the name-calling even though he knows you cry over every-fucking-thing, the pushes and the shoves knowing your barely half his size. all of it.
still he cant help it. maybe theres something wrong with him. he doesnt know and he doesnt really care. he knows you wont leave so what the fuck, why would he stop?
“look at you,” he takes the hand that isnt practically raising you up to your tippytoes and cups your face, running his thumb over your bottom lip, “your the prettiest girl in the world y’know that? too bad your a crazy bitch.”
>_<
its only like an hour later n youve forgotten all about the petty fight with your boyfriend. forgot that you threw the slipper at him cause he was being sneaky with his phone nd refused to let you see it. dont care tho. you love him again.
“feels so good baby,” he groans, pushing in n out of your slippery pussy with his thick cock, “i love you so much…y’know that?”
you’re being shuffled down towards his standing form some more, ass hanging off of the bed and pushing against fat balls that are pat, pat, patting against your squishy thighs.
“yesyesyes, love you—i-i love you!” you dont even know what the fuck your saying—cant process anything but the feeling of his fat cock stuffing you full. hes so deep n you and its hard to even breathe. feel like hes up your nose.
“s’deep connie ngh…m’cummin again,” youre looking up at him. watching his pretty eyes open n close again n again. watching him bite his saliva covered lips and waching his button nose scrunch up in pleasure. your eyes flick down to obvious bulge in your tummy and you mewl wrapping your legs around his moving hips. trapping him.
your pussy is so fucking greedy, suckin him in again n again and she still cant get enough. connies bringing his hand down and pushing right on that bulge in your pretty tummy that has you both whining. looking you right in the eyes, “go ‘head princess,” and he giggles when you let out the sluttiest little moan, “that feel good huh?”
youre whining out the loudest connnieee follwed by some praise before your squirting all over him, getting both your tummies soaked up and making a mess all over his dark blue bedsheets.
hes following close after with an annoyingly sexy, fuuuck baby and coming right in your swollen pussy.
youre so tired. can hardly open your eyes when you feel connie already pulling out of you to go clean you up. grabbing one of his freshly cleaned sweat towels usually reserved for basketball, crouching down and dabbing it around your messy pussy.
“there you go princess,” hes speaking not to you, but to your cunt, “good as new.” hes leaving a big wet kiss to your pussy like he always does, standing right after and hovering over you to leave an even wetter kiss to your abused lips, throwing the towel somewhere across the room.
>_<
your cozily straddling connie in his bed, being lulled to sleep by his fingers smoothing over your hair.
hes smoking again, cautious enough to not blow it in your face though—he knows you hate smoke—thats only for when he wants to piss you off. you hear him clear his throat.
“m’gonna stop this baby,” hes smoothing over the same roots of your hair he tugged on earlier, “m’serious, no more of this arguing shit,” he grabs your face, pushing your lips into a pout. “ill do better.”
yeah fucking right. you both know thats bullshit. you guys ‘ll be back at all the screaming n yelling tomorrow.
#can you tell im not that good at smut#connie smut#connie springer#connie x reader#aot smut#tw toxic relationship#tw toxicity#connie springer smut#toxic!connie
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Aussie question time: when I find out an idol is American/Canadian, their image in my mind completely changes because now it’s like “Oh I know exactly who you are, I grew up with your type around me” there are subtleties that I’m going to understand that others might not. So with all that said, I’ve been curious about what that’s like (if you experience it) w the skz aussies (throw in a lily if you’re feeling it -v-) 🎤
this is wayyyyyy too long so I'm putting it under a read more- also disclaimer: i dont know these guys and these are just my opinions, dont take em too srs <3
Hmmmm... Well I guess I'll start with Felix- I've said it before a bunch but the whole "Felix is a tiny uwuw baby sweet summerchild who is just such a baby" etc. etc. has made me laugh from the get go- because Yep! he is incredibly sensitive and sweet natured and kind and he cries a lot- 100% that is true. Dont think I'm saying it's not. But like. He also grew up in western sydney, he grew up in a area that if you google it one of the first suggestions is "is it safe" but then at the same time he went to private catholic school im pretty sure. and i saw pics from back then that he'd posted back in the day of cool little felix with his gold watch and his fade and all his little homeboys looking rowdy on the train- I know that kid and while that kid can also be sweet and sensitive, he's not incapable and hes not a baby. Good recent example was when he went on that Jewel box show with the gay dudes and people were acting like he was *so uncomfortable* and sooooo out of his element and so this and so that- theres gay dudes all over sydney, there's gay dudes all over australian media- the idea felix couldnt handle that was simply laughable to me- but it kinda shows how many outside perceptions of him still very much fall into that vaguely infantalizing thing. Like when he was the one who was happy to go up to adam levine and dj snake in that skz talker while the other boys were much more shy? that didnt shock me at all. felix went to korea as a whole teenager laregly against his parent wishes- he's actually quite an outgoing and brave guy. Outgoing guys can still be sweeties, though- one doesn't negate the other.
One other aspect of Felix i think a lot of fans just gloss over but is easily noticeable by me is that he can kindaaaaaa be ... a lil bitchy? like he's never ever mean or cruel dont get me wrong- but he has a slight bitchy streak, he rolls his eyes AND he's actually much more sarcastic than people bring up? Again- he does it a lot with Chan and that doesnt shock me- they both are aussie boys, Chan will get it and I think Felix can very much be himself with Chan, he doesn't necessarily feel the need to put up an extra air of like... Sweetie boy-ness? bc when he calls chan a cunt on live chan just laughs and goes OI!! so yuh the main thing with felix is while i do think hes a little sweet guy, ive never from the get go had a hard time seeing him outside of that box, too. Also maybe that's a lil bit aussie humour slipping under the radar here or there 🤔
Chan to me from the get go too was pretty much like. Prototypical overachieving aussie Good Boy. Like, i had a drafted post i never posted bc it was too niche- but it was essentially about how he speaks about sports and the like, and it just said "We get it. You went to zone carnival" which was the sporting event that the kids who got gold or 1st place were sent to. If you went to zone, you were the Successful kid. I think these days most fans perceive him as... a bit of a goofy guy? but I have gone through the archives and i have seen the comments from people talking about how chans such a bad boy- thats shit is so funny to me bc you can show me every iteration of chan and I'd never, ever think he's a bad boy. Like he wishes he was a bad boy, he kinda cosplays a bad boy- even him referencing swearing bc of his australianess and shit over the years makes me giggle a little bc i feel like felix def 100% swears all the time but he doesnt like Smirk about it too much? he doesnt really bring it up? things like that stand out, it to me feels very like Oh yeah I'm this naughty Aussie boy who swears hehe and then all the australians are like ? Girl we all do huh lmao
Otherwise, I dont have as much to say about chan as i do about felix, funnily. Like idk people might perceive differently to me, but nothing too far off? I will say that given Chan's success and the fact he was seemingly a very well achieving kid too (maybe not debuting for such a long time is part of this) he is WAY more humble than I'd expect. Like not to besmirch Australian men but a lot of them can be really loud and cocky, especially the famous successful ones (any sport star) it's almost encouraged to be like that if you're a dude (but only to a certain degree, anything beyond a certain point and you'll be roasted lol) So I have to give credit where it's due and say that Chan *Seemingly does have a very good nature and I appreciate that about him! Its probably why I like him so much bc he actually very much doesn't give off those vibes- he doesn't seem like that overly macho cocky bloke I know very well. So that makes him good fun for me- he's very successful and he's confident and yet he doesn't activate any of my bitch instincts- thats impressive! I don't know him, so I'll never know for sure of course, i feel like i need to make that disclaimer but still I do believe he has a good heart, and he tries so hard! and I appreciate that.
Lily is weirdly like Chan. like she's hilariously like chan tbh- I wonder how they really get along sometimes bc I feel like they might look at each other and be like Hm... we the same............ ? Lmao I will say though, lily is a bit out of pocket and half of that I believe is her personality but half of it is just.... I think she's just australian 😭 like i cant lie you get me as a teenager to early 20 something and put me on a live and I can promise I would be saying as much ?? shit. Like, I do think Australians are a little loud and not necessarily always.... tactful (again Not everyone, but yk.) lily certainly fits that bill to a T. I appreciate that regardless of her idolhood she does still say things that maybe she shouldn't, she shrugs off a shoplifting confession, she says she'd murder someone if she had to, she bought and wore a shirt that fans quickly tracked down and found out all the proceeds were going to Palestine- she would have known what that suggested. she clearly had this goal of being an idol since she was a baby, like literal baby but she hasn't sacrificed her broader personality, even the parts that could potentially be off-putting to those idol fans that expect perfection and nothing else. I appreciate that in her! and I hope she never loses her little weird girl spark bc it does make her very dynamic! Her slightly gruff aussie girlness is very fun for me to see in the idolsphere bc it def feels out of place, but in a refreshing way...
so yeah. Idk if this was sensical, I was making dinner so I put my phone down a bunch and it's probably disjointed but thats my opinion... my thoughts, my ideas! Idk my take on them. Thanks for asking 🫡
#thanks for the ask!#rustinged#i will say though as well im p comfy on commenting on things chan and felix say.... bc like. im from the same area#we are new south welshmen.... sydney siders.... im from here so i usually get their little quirks p well#with lily shes younger and from a different state so its a little different#same as if there was an idol from like western australia or northern queensland or the northern Territory#i wouldnt be anywhere near as confident in talking about them bc ive really never been there and its very different from syd#but also GOD id love an NT idol that would be the funniest shit ever#or like a miners kid from WA 😭 sounds funny to me#but yeah :)#this is so long for nothing much but if theres one thing i can do its talk so
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