turbotaxevasion

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playing with headcanons and im realizing it makes him look more like Dick lmao

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I was transferred to another unit and my usual coworkers sent me a care package...

... Thanks guys

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i love you pookie but you are sooooooooooo hard to draw save me dan mora how the hell do i draw his stupid hair????

hE DOESNT LOOK THE SAME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Things I do as a Night Shift nurse that I think the Bats also do

Bruce

sigh, a lot

walk around to stay awake

pretend to shake the computer when it freezes but i know its expensive so i cant break it

turn all the lights off and hiss when someone turns them all the way up

Dick

say "good morning" at 11 pm

randomly dropping that i have a DNR

saying hello to everyone i pass by so they dont think im mad at them bc of my tired bitch face

Barbara

wiggling my fingers on the keyboard so the keys make the fun click clack sound even tho im not typing anything

looking at a file note and going "wow, and on x history month/international x day" to literally anything

seeing an acronym and going "what is that?", googling it, and realizing that i did already know it

guessing random acronyms and never attempting to learn what it actually stands for

Cass

walking quietly so i dont disturb people and accidentally scare my coworkers bc they didnt hear me come up to them

dance with my hands to the music in my head bc full body dancing is socially quite weird

dancing with my full body if i see another nurse (vigilante ig) down the unit (across a building maybe) to communicate like bees

quacking at other nurses (vigilantes ig) when they start to complain

Jason

"do not need me, figure it out or perish" - said to another nurse (vigilante ig)

getting into a philosophical debate with a sundowner dementia grandma and going "ok ms. girl!!! didnt know she was educated!!!" when she tells me she was a teacher and a waitress and a ceo and an engineer and a pilot and an astrophysicist and a lawyer with her single bachelor's of english (i love my ladies pls dont think i dont theyre sweethearts)

"and what inspired this choice?" - said any time a patient (civilian ig) does something not only strange but potentially dangerous but i dont want them to think im mad at them

Tim

40 oz Stanley full of pre-workout

"is it too early to go home?" - said 2 hours into a 12 hour shift

wandering around with my coat on my shoulders like a cape bc its cold in the hallway and forgetting about it until i go into a room and start melting

"i think a shot of ketamine could fix most people but this lady is unfortunately built stronger than that"

Stephanie

braiding everybody's hair bc they found out she could and now can never escape it

calling tim pookie on shift even tho they are not dating (i do this with a fellow nurse that i am alao very good friends with)

debating whether or not she eats, pees, or naps during her break

snacks so frequently in the cave theres a note by the bat-computer saying "do not eat on bat-computer"

Duke

"i should not be awake right now, this is cruel"

"please do not the microwave" - we're missing a microwave and they almost broke this one too

clearing out the work fridge and when ppl complain goes "wah wah wah im [name] and i wanna eat mold even tho im allergic"

Damian

"this place will not be standing in the morning"

"you say im nice but you should know im seething and full of rage"

showing coworkers pics of my cat theyve definitely already seen

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Hospital Night Shift Core

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im about to file a complaint about my body bc what business does it have breaking out into a full body rash 6 hours into a 12 hour overnight shift??? literally why did it do that???

popped a benadryl and put ice packs on it, but what the absolute fuck???

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my winter fits have so much drip but no one will ever know bc i have the thermal coat and snow boots on

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hey yeah what the fuck did i just fucking read???

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yeah, i did just spend $80 on books when my to-be-read pile is at almost 30 books and no, i dont want to talk about it

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Tf you mean people don’t keep their bedroom windows open for long amounts of time? You ACTUALY close it at night?? Dude.. I haven’t closed my window since give or take a bit around the start of spring.. and even as im freezing my bone off I refuse to close it completely - I NEED the circulating air. Do inform me.. is it actually common practice to close your window at night?

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buying alcohol for the first time in years why do i feel like a little criminal i shouldnt be this embarrassed????

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never go anywhere without the red tennies :P

soft tagging @headfullofgalaxies

I think it's time to start a picrew chain guys. Create your typical summer look! (for outside world, I know that inside look is usually nothing™ and Tumblr could not like that)

Tagging!! @afusiek @ayakashibackstreet @jasperygrace @copper-dragon-in-disguise @kamileonik @icedtoastt @ambersky0319 @cosmiccoincidence @echoxeclipse @grand-theft-carbohydrates @gummybugg @jay0fspad3s @kotofeden @sleepyowlwrites @tosieks @yesireadbooks @vallhallarama and open tag <3

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the vet gave me an extra dose of gabapentin for my cat because he fought the sedation last time

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"tim drakes nightmare blunt rotation" and its just all of his brothers

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oh, im sorry, you think i enjoy having to take blood from you??? youre right. is this arm okay?

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as someone who has seen your cat in real life, i maintain that he is some kind of cryptid masquerading as a cat. a wonderful little mold spore that screams <3

I know exactly who you are, you're legit the only person who refers to the little idiot as a "mold spore." That being said, you're not wrong...