#i dont know how either will be solved. and im starting to think theres no quick way to fix it and that its just getting worse

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for telling someone i can't be friends with them and returning a gift?

buckle up gamers, this is gonna be a long one. so i (22nb but i present fem) was out at the bars the other night just kinda hanging out, and a girl (26f) came up and started talking to me. she didnt really seem...super present i guess? and i talked to her to be nice and she had a cool outfit on. well i was a little drunk and ended up giving her my phone number and meeting her husband (39m) and they walked me home. the whole time she was talking about how she doesn't have any friends and her ex friends just wanted to get with her husband. she told me she was bi and i was like hey me too but im not interested in sex so that was cool. she ended up walking me home w her husband bc it was late which was nice, but they seemed really shocked i lived in such a nice apartment(i do, its expensive but my parents pay for it. im really privileged to be able to do that).

i saw her again today because she kept texting me about wanting to hang out, so i went for ice cream with her bc it was in a public place and i wasnt super comfortable going back to her apt with her. i paid for her ice cream bc she said her card wasnt working, nbd bc my parents have money and her and her husband aren't really well off. i said she could pay me back sometime, buy me ice cream or whatever another day, but she really fixated on it. she told me her husband thought i was cute which made me a little uncomfortable but i laughed it of, and then she kept talking about how she was bi and would date a girl and how she approached me not to date but to be a friend and then 'see where it goes.' she also told me she did porn online to make money which is fine w me, that she's on disability but that the money isnt really enough to live on, and that she'd been raped in the past and drugged which yanno a little overshare-y considering ive known her for three days but she really seemed like she needed someone to talk to and im good at listening. well her husband showed up out of nowhere bc he apparently tracks her phone and we all went back to their apartment bc i couldn't say no(im a doormat. i know) and she ended up giving me two pieces of jewelry in return for buying her ice cream which felt a little like overkill. i tried to refuse but she said she wouldn't ever wear them again so it would be fine. it was really kind of her but now i kind of feel i owe her back for them. the whole time i was there they seemed really eager to get me to move in nearby, and while its true that area is definitely cheaper my parents are really fine paying for my expensive apartment bc my tuition is a lot cheaper than my sibling's. she and her husband walked me home again, mentioning they might be going on a cruise in november if they could save up the money and that they could bring a friend. i said id almost definitely have school which they seemed to accept. they kind of seemed to want to see my place, but i told them it was really messy(it is) i have anxiety around having people in my space(i do) and that maybe they could come up another day and i could make dinner, and she told me she didn't like people cooking for her bc she'd been drugged in the past and that i could go over to their apartment again instead.

my parents think theres some really big red flags going on and i should try to break this off sooner rather than later. i pretty much agree. im not gonna ghost her and they dont think i should either, but that i should somehow return the jewelry in a kind way and tell her i cant really be super close friends. my mom had the idea to draw myself wearing the jewelry and then say i still have a memory of it but to return it bc i cant accept such a nice gift which i could try to do.

to be clear i am shit at communication and setting boundaries, im very aware of that, and most of this can be solved by telling her hey i can't accept this gift and im really busy for school a lot and im sorry i cant be as much as a friend as you need. but i still kinda feel like tah for leading her on almost and then breaking it off like everyone else in her life. ive been under a lot of stress bc of school and my stepgrandmother passing and trying to take care of my grandfather so trying to be friends with someone that seems kind of high maintenance is not really tenable for me.

so, wibta if i tried to let her down gently?

What are these acronyms?

[gay-little-cloud]

remember that theory on the nct dreamverse about jisung forcing the members to stay with him on this imaginary realm/time loop/dream so he wouldnt be alone........ im starting to think its true... bro looks sus af in these new teasers because whats this ??

and like this is not even his first time breaking the 4th wall......

thats: chewing gum, joy, synchronization of dreams and rainbow.

bonus: (its very long, sorry)

the video NCTmentary EP3. Empathy is literally about how the dreamies are conected to each other thru dreams. and theres a scene where jisung says "last night i had a dream"

and then we get jaemin saying he had the same dream as jisung and that he thinks he was "lured by something" and felt like he was "wrapped in smoke", which is interesting because the other dreamies talk about how they think they saw each other in their dreams but none of them say they were actually there or lured by something (none of the other dreamies shared a dream with jisung, just jaemin).

also !! when the members talk about the dreams they had about each other they are together in reality, but jisung is the only one thats alone on a room writing about it on his diary instead of actually talking to someone (another member or the camera).

when jaemin talks about his dream with jisung, jisung is also not there, and the scene we see of them together are the scenes of the dream (theyre wrapped in smoke). so jisung is never seen with the members in the real word.

and then on EP.4 Synchronization of Dreams is when we get this scene

the full scene shows jisung entering the room, the rest of the dreamies were already there watching the tv not moving at all.

on DREAM LOOP : The Last Midnight #1, jisung is the only member that immeditely assumes theyre trapped on a dream, with little to no proof, he just remembers (and we see someone kept a diary, im sure it was him, again) and he's the one to tell the members "i think we're locked in here"

on EP5. Back to the Reality, they explain to us that reality is "a world with limits" and so the dream lab was "created to break these limits in reality". they also say one of the stages they can reach its called "dream in a dream" where "the dream can influence reality".

now we get kun telling us about a dream he had where he saw a door and we get these scenes:

thats jisung !!!! on the inside of the dream door !! like-

which is something we ALSO get to see on EP3. Empathy, while hes writing about his dream on his diary (he's the only member ever shown by the door):

and when the narrator explains how to come back to reality they show a bit of jisungs dream with the smoke but this time is on reverse, as in deleting all their progress.

NOW all of those are actual canon events on the nct universe so whats the theory.

theres a lot of versions of the same thing but they all conclude the same: jisung doesnt want the members to leave this imaginary realm/time loop/dream theyre trapped in.

why ? the main theories ive seen are:

-the dreamies are not real and jisung made them up as imaginary friends but this dream in a dream state that can influence reality made them lowkey real ?? but they dont exist in the real word so to leave the dream world would mean to lose them.

-the dreamies died and jisung has them trapped on a loop where they dont get to ever die. jisung can come in and out of the loop/dream but the members cant.

in every version of the dream in which the members are aware that theyre trapped, they want to leave. either because they don't know what would happen if they do or because they just want jisung to let go and get to have a real life without them.

at the end of DREAM LOOP : The Last Midnight #2, the members solve all the puzzles to get out of the loop correctly but right after they leave the dream world thru the door the day starts again with jisung saying theyre trapped on a loop.

this implies jisung is succesfully controling the realities where the members exist and that even if he reveals to the dreamies that they are trapped in a dream, they still wont be able to leave.

so jisung is using the dream lab to break the limits of reality by keeping the members trapped because they wouldnt exists if not for this.

and then i think all the different universes we've been seeing the members go thru as 7DREAM (like all the chapters of DREAM-VERSE or Production : Stranger Seven) are realities jisung is making up to keep the members together forever, but it probably gets more and more difficult each time.

maybe we get to see them scape this comeback ?? i mean its literally called [DREAM( )SCAPE].................

cant wait to see the scape films ! 5 chapters !!

wait i cant believe they posted one of the new teasers while i was writing this lmao

i love it here !!!!!! this is so good !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[positivelyadhd]

ik its not ur usual positivity but THANK YOU so much for that post!!! I feel like "gifted kid burnout" really dominates the conversation and thats only one experience of many.

I was diagnosed with adhd in elementary school and was basically like. "the kid with problems" "lost cause" my entire life. one of my teachers even directly told my mom she should be ashamed of me lol. any successes were like-- "see what you just did? imagine how much more you would be capable of if you didn't have adhd." to the point where I don't even feel any sense of accomplishment for graduating college. it's just one more "failure" i avoided in other peoples eyes. (i dont personally think not graduating college is a failure at all btw, that is just Society's Message™)

this part is kinda tangential but from what i've seen a lot (ofc not all) of gifted kid burnout posts are like, if only i would have been diagnosed earlier all of this could be avoided. and maybe that's true - I understand where it's coming from at least, the frustration of feeling that something is wrong but not knowing what or having that "proof" that you're not just "lazy" etc. im not saying this isn't a valid wish or frustration but in my experience... hoooo boy.

personally being diagnosed with ADHD in the early 2000s, didn't meant you got support, it meant you were written off from the start, adults thought you had no future, you were seen as a "problem child" like it wasn't "oh you're not lazy you just have adhd!" it was "you have ADHD so you are built to be lazy and theres nothing you can do about it lol" so it didn't solve much. just created a different type of problem. im very happy to see things look to be changing though!!

I'm curious if other people had a similar experience and thank you so much for adding the 'diagnosed but not supported' part bc that is so real!!!

Absolutely this!!

My experience with diagnosis and lack of support was strange, but basically my primary (ages 4-11) school (I believe) suspected I had adhd/dyslexia and did offer some (very limited) support. But they also always told my parents they didn't think I had a learning difficulty when they asked because I was in extra programmes. I don't really think the support they did give me really helped all that much, and honestly, when I did get my diagnosis (around 12/13?) I'd spent so long thinking there was just something "wrong" with me that I feel like the lack of diagnosis was a lot more negatively impactful than not receiving support would've been.

My secondary school then managed to flip this and despite me getting my diagnosis part way through, nothing really changed either. Being told I had ADHD/Dyslexia changed me and my understanding of myself. I finally felt like things made sense and there was a reason i found things so difficult, it wasn't that there was something "wrong" with me but the system was not built for me. Although my diagnosis was early compared to some people, it felt late to me, and everything that can happen when you're undiagnosed had already set in.

I wished I'd been diagnosed earlier but honestly, I had a similar experience to you, and I don't think it would've done much. And even when I was finally diagnosed, my school also never really acknowledged my diagnosis and wouldn't put any of the accommodations that I needed in place (despite my diagnosis coming with a report which explained everything they should've been doing to support me and how they could've done it) I didn't get any accommodations for my neurodiversity until I was in uni, and I got my diagnosis in 2015 so at least for me, my experience wasn't that different to yours in the early 2000s.

When I tried to fight for the accommodations I should've been given, I was told that I would pass my exams, and so it didn't really matter, they didn't believe going through the hassle of giving me accommodations would help me (although the diagnosis report itself said otherwise.) I always felt similarly to you, I could scrape by but "imagine how much better you'd do without dyslexia/adhd" but I also had this weird "well because you're "gifted" you can get average grades, you don't need support!" message as well?

And yeah, just like you, I didn't really feel as accomplished as I should've done when I finished uni. I'm proud of myself for doing it but I do feel this weird pressure of knowing that if I didn't have adhd/dyslexia or managed it better, I would've done much better.

I apologise for rambling about myself but yeah thank you for this ask! I feel the same way, and I'm glad to hear I'm not alone in it as well.

I wish you the best dear anon <3

[istherewifiinhell]

oh boy if theres any cover that could get my attention

[ID: Comic cover art by Mark Texeira, showing Spider-man swinging a web around Megatron, his arms bound to his chest. Spidey's in the black symbiote suit, other decepticons reacting to their tussle. END]

well anyway its not very good. marvel tf no 3, or 5-6 in uk, 1984, (despite the cover indicating january, it was in the fall)

alright lets go-- Writer: Jim Salicrup, Pencils: Frank Springer, Inks: Kim Demulder & Mike Esposito, Letters: Janice Chiang and Others*, Colour: Nelson Yomtov, Editor: Bob Buduansky, EiC: Jim Shooter Digital re-master by digikore studios limited. collection edits by Justin Eisinger and Alonzo Simon. editorial notes and assistance by Mark. W. Bellomo

* thats really how they credited it. not even the wiki list anyone else. what the fuck.

normally i strive for these posts to be ordered either in a way for comedy, or perhaps one that will give a gist of the plot. this one were just gonna try and get thru. okay?

robots... COMMENCE

[ID: Caption box: "--Or. While still inside him, witnessing Starscream's amazing transformation will!" Starscream lands from jet to bot mode, and says "Machines have been slaves on this backward world long enough!" He opens his cockpit, continuing "Today the roles are rightly reversed!" Sparkplug, who's hoisted up by the shirt goes "Ulp!" END]

always good to check in. okay. thanks starscream.

[ID: Sparkplug looks distressed, as Megatron looms behind. He's thinking "And these guys ain't any friendlier than my jailkeepers when i was a prisoner of war in Korea. Well, if that's the case…" and then says "My name's William Witwicky!Sergeant first class, United States Marines! Serial number--" Megatron picks him up by the foot, dangling him at head height. "Enough! You will cooperate or cease to exist!" END]

wha-. WILLIAM??? he was a POW in the KOREAN WAR. what the fuck. dont say that. dont say that ever again. anyway

[ID: Inside the Decepticon base, the cons standing around. Megatron speaks "Rumble…", who in response, twists his hand and replies "Whatever you say, boss!" Sparkplug standing on a small platform, thinks "These stooges'll do whatever the big cheese tells them!" Rumble holds his now unscrewed hand in the other, directing the energon spilling from his wrist into a oil drum. He says "Say "When" Scraplet!" Sparkplug replies "Er-- that's enough!" END]

i mean. yeah i think when ur saying. okay. ill do the science u kidnapped me for, but ill need some samples. ur not really expecting. that.

[ID: Autobots in alt mode, Optimus with his trailer open, says "Hound, Sideswipe, you're both low in fuel! Ride with me!" Sideswipe is driving up the trailer ramp and Hound responds "As you command, Optimus!" but thinks to himself "Wait 'til Doc Ratchet sees he has to patch up Sideswipe-- again!*" editors note: *see last issue-Bob. END]

hey look, play features. (i always love an editors note when theres less than 5 issues lol)

and introducing in this episodes special introduction

[ID: Full body of Ratchet, hands on hips. Notable, he looks more like a regular transformer, with a clear head and face, a blocky but still human layout of body. END]

the character models have been finished! good to see ya ratchet, hows having a body suiting ya? oh sorry were you looking for spiderman?

[ID: Caption box: "Soon, in a nearby secluded spot…" Peter Parker hides behind some rocks, looking toward a crowd on the other side. He thinks "I'll have a much better chance at photographing whatever's in that fortress as Spider- man!" and the symbiote suit starts to cover his body. "This costume's quite a time-saver! All I have to do is think about changing and it takes care of the rest!" He swings up to a tree thinking "If only I could solve all my problems as easily!" Editors note reads "This story takes place before spider-man #258." END]

im gonna level with you editors. i dont know what that means and i dont care.

[ID: Spidey is upside down, watching Gears transform, thinking "--I bet he's one of those robots returning to the nest!" Gears meanwhile thinks "How did i get stuck with this scouting mission? What do i care about these pesky little creatures?" He flies off, he continues musing "I've always suspected that Optimus Prime had a perverse sense of humor!" Spidey swings after him calling out "Hey! Hold on, big boy!--or as that funny lady on tv says, "Can we talk?" END]

spiderman can't u tell hes busy bitching about his job? all tho 10/10 first words to a transformers being hold on big boy.... me too man.

[ID: Caption box: Later, after extensive introductions and explanations… Spidey is hanging upside down over a congregation of Autobots in alt mode and remarks "I've fought alongside some weird characters in my career, Optimus--but this has to be a first!" Optimus replies "I am sure tales of your exploits would be interesting, Spider-man, but, for now, can you inform your military to step aside and allow us to deal with the Decepticons?" Spidey "Trust me--they'll never buy it coming from me! But i've got a plan!" END]

oh okay so were just. yeah okay were just gonna skip the interesting parts. no first meeting. okay. both of them: you seem cool but i havent read your comics. and also im not going to.

[ID: Caption Box: Meanwhile... Spidey and Gears scout out the Decepticon Base. Spidey, comically at length: We're in luck, Gears! With the army and your buddies keeping them busy out front, they're not guarding the back door! Of course, this sheer drop is enough to discourage most visitors--even traveling salesman-- but not your friendly out-of-town Spider-man! Gears thinks "This human reminds me of Bluestreak they both seem to love the sound of their own voice!" Spidey scales the cliff as Gears shoots up past him asking "Do all humans have powers like yours?" Spidey: Not since i checked last! I'd feel real foolish if they did! END]

does the bad text layout get a pass when its for a joke?

anyway give it up for the best three panels weve had all series

[ID: Spidey swinging around inside the base, Gears following, a door closing at the end of the hall. Spidey: They're trying to seal us in and i didn't even bring my overnight bag! He swings under the lowering bulkhead, calling out "See you later, big brother!" Gears simply bust thru the closed door saying "Not so fast! We're in this together, little one!" END]

wait what the fuck that was actually really cute. do that again, for a second there i thought i was reading good comics for a change

[ID: Spidey webbing up Megatron saying "Bazooka Joe's all tied up... Let's call a cab and split!" Gears is guiding Sparkplug away, who says "Remind me to thank that masked fella!" But Gears is thinking "This is worse than I expected! We don't have a chance against Megatron!" And calls out "Spider-man, hurry! We must--!" END]

Mf called him BAZOOKA JOE. alright. probably spiderman showing up after u were kidnapped by robits. not a big deal?

[ID: Caption box: Soon, after the other Autobots have disengaged from their battle with the Decepticons on the other side of the mountain… Autobots are standing over Gears, crumpled on the ground. One, Sunstreaker or Brawn, announces "That's the last piece-- we've collected all that's left of him!" Spidey is lowering down on a web asking "How can you all be so cold and unfeeling? He died a hero!" Sparkplug on the ground adds "Don't you even have mechanical hearts?" END]

lot of assuming "i know when robots are dead" from the humans here. hes fine. not that anyone even took the two seconds to say, "for us this is a recoverable injury he just needs the medic" lol. he waited until ratchet was actually. DOING that back at base. anyway. thats the crossover comic. its. not great. fine. maybe. OKAY BYE

[ID: Soundwave, heaving a massive piece of machinery over his head, and casually walking over a iron wrought fence that crunches under his feet. A guard shooting at him harmlessly and yelling "H-hey! Come back here with that!" And then thinks to himself "I'd quit this job if i wasn't so close to retirement! END]

(demastered edit. PURPLEWAVE YOU WILL LIVE ON IN OUR HEARTS AND MINDS)

[moncey-imagines]

WDW Trip Headcanons | Sans x GN!Reader

Sorry this took so long, Thanksgiving week has been quite busy 🥲 but now it is done and out for all the world to see 🐎🐎for context, the reader is hyperfixated on the disney parks (just like me 😎)

!!THIS HAS NOT BEEN PROOF-READ OR EDITED!!

enjoy!!!

Also I added an intro to lead into the headcanons 😱

It started with a simple statement:

* WHAT?? SERIOUSLY???

* seriously.

This is the first time you found out that Sans had absolutely no idea about the pure magic and majesty of Disney parks.

* You've been on the surface for like a year...how do you STILL not know about Disneyworld...

* idk

* Do you even know about the Disney company at all??? You have to, they are industry giants in like every category of anything ever...

* i think so, are they the ones that have the princesses?

* Which princesses?

* you know, the ones.

* No I don't, you have to tell me which ones.

* the ones with the hair.

* WHAT KIND OF HAIR?

* long hair i think.

* Rapunzel?

* idk

* Okay yeah that's it, we're going to Disneyworld, lemme go book the flights.

* cool

Two weeks later, you and your skeleton boyfriend were off to Orlando so you could expose him to the wonders of Walt Disney World.

Once you two are there and walking around, he'd probably be more focused on you rather than the park. I mean, it's kind of hard to ignore how excited you get over being in the park. The amount of facts that pop up in your brain the second you're in the parks is abundant, so much so that there is no way to stop you excited rambling (not that he'd try, he thinks it's cute).

* Look!! Look at the windows!!

* im lookin.

* It's a tribute to Marc Davis!!

* i...sorry, i dont know who that is.

Expect a lot of Sans not understanding a single thing you're talking about.

* Sans!! Look at the rocks, it's shaped like the Nautilus!!

* yeah?

* Yeah!! That's cause 20000 Leagues Under the Sea was here before The Little Mermaid ride!!

* wow.

* Do you know what any of what I just said means?

* um...not really no, im sorry.

He'll still listen though, he likes seeing you happy and excited.

* i really don't think these guys have the guts to be in here naked

* They're fake skeletons, Sans, but there's a rumor that the skull on the bed in Disneyland if re- wait...they don't have the guts. I just got it.

* took you a minute huh.

* Shut it, bonehead.

* sorry, but a name like that won't get under my skin.

* These jokes suck, you must have left your funny bone at home.

* i know, im just a lazy bones like that.

Everyone around you two have to occasionally either sit through agonizingly horrible jokes or get up and walk away.

* Hey, Sans! Do you think you can solve the murder mystery?

* murder mystery? isnt that a little dark for magic kingdom?

* It's not too dark for the Haunted Mansion, that's what this ride is all about.

* ah, okay. i wont let it rattle my bones then.

* You're such a doofus.

* actually, in your own words, im a bonehead.

* Do you think you can do the puzzle or not? The lines gonna move...

* yeah, yeah, okay.

Sans also seems to really like standing in line to hear what other people are saying.

* people say some wild stuff here, (y/n).

* Like what?

* i just heard a little girl ask her mom what happened to Mickey Mouse when he went backstage and her older sister said that the staff skinned him.

* Oh my god.

* thats not all, after that her mom agreed and told her thats how they make the Mickey ear hats.

* these fireworks are pretty nice.

* Did you know that they have to set them off no matter what? For safety reasons, they can't let old fireworks sit back there unused, even is they cancel the shows.

* so theres technically always a show?

* ...I guess so, yeah.

* ...

* What do you think happens if an airplane flies to close to the fire works?

* what happens?

* It probably becomes a scareplane.

* that one's a stretch

* C'mon, I thought it was funny.

* you were close, but not close enough. maybe next time.

Driving the car to the hotel, you turn to Sans.

* Did you...like today's trip? I wasn't annoying was I?

* i liked it, yeah, and not at all, i thought all your little facts were great. im excited for what you tell me tommorow.

* Alright, I'll stock up on my facts for Animal Kingdom tomorrow.

* you better, ill even polish my humerus.

* I knew you were gonna make some kind of pun, I felt it in my bones.

* what, have you been spine on me?

* Okay, that one was knee-t.

Sans lets out a sigh.

* What's wrong?

* nothing at all, i love you.

I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG AAAAA

also sorry if its more dialogue than headcanons, I've been coding VNs as of late DHFYSGADFh

I kinda wanna make this into a short visual novel...but I cannot at the moment, I must get this fic out DHGFIYFSG

I hope it was good, if anyone wants a part two in another part just send in an ask 😎

[hinacu-arts]

Actually typing on my computer for once so I'm able to use the read more lol. I need you guys to tell me if you want this in

BBC - The Fic

which would either be as its own chapter or Casey reading it. Theres also the option of it becoming a short little companion story/fic, and im also considering writing a final battle deal but I'm not sure I want both in BBC. Here's the first part of it, I cant really write more until the actual fic is written unless I got more technical on the How Do We Solve This Problem line of convo.

Reminder that this is a group chat on all of 2012's phones, that's why their names are there. Debating on whether or not to change that. The first section is copy and pasted from the section that was in Chp 2. I tried to space it out like actual texting, but tumblr was fighting me so thats why there are random "."s in there

Key Donnie = in 1987 (the first TV show) Mikey = in 1990 (the first live action movies from 90,91, and 93) April = in 2003 (the second TV show) Leo = in 2007 (the CGI animated movie) Raph = in 2014 (the second live action movies from 2014 and 2016) Casey = in 2018 (rottmnt)

LEO: anyone copy?

.

APRIL: copy

.

RAPH: hallelujah. Get me out of this hell

.

LEO: not yet. Donnie says he needs a response by everyone before he can track your locations

LEO: hi other versions of us -Mikey

.

DONNIE: the tech i have to work with here is ancient i hate it. No computer needs to be this chunky

.

MIKEY: mikey is asleep but his phone is receiving -Donnie

.

CASEY: fucking finally. Do you know how many frequencies i had to try to get these messages to come in. not to mention how i had to pry the phone out of Leo's hands so i could take it apart

CASEY: anyways happy to report we haven't gotten him killed yet

CASEY: for the record he came to us bruised that was not our fault

APRIL: great. We can start narrowing down locations now -Don

CASEY: spoke too soon Casey found out about your Casey and she's demanding a fight to the death. Casey might be coming home in pieces

RAPH: wtf

CASEY: do you want him in a box or can i send him in a crate?

RAPH: wtf -Donnie

CASEY: youre right, if he's bleeding the blood will ooze out

.

MIKEY: wtf -everyone here

LEO: wtf -Donnie

DONNIE: i dont know to respond to this -both Donnies

RAPH: damn. put him in a cooler, those are water tight -April

RAPH: please do not listen to her and please dont let any maiming occur -Donnie

----------------------------------------------------------------------

RAPH: by any chance has anyone done the calculations for their own universe? I did ours a couple years ago and its Universe 2-0-1-4 -Donnie

DONNIE: Donnie says this universe is 1-9-8-7. Our home universe is 2-0-1-2

ARPIL: Don says this one is 2003

LEO: Donnie says this is Earth 2,007

RAPH: great. We just cut down a lot of time trying to figure that out. Now we just need to track and calculate your Mikey and Casey’s locations

APRIL: their Dons have probably already done the work themselves. @Mikey @Casey -Don

.

DONNIE: they aren’t answering. Either they can’t get to the computer or they’re sleeping. Lets just begin the math ourselves. Me and Donnie will get started on Mikey. Who wants to track Casey?

LEO: I’ve been collecting data the whole time, I’ll take Casey. The universe he landed in sounds hardcore, if that Donnie wasn’t exaggerating. Casey’s hardcore but we should get him out of there as soon as possible -Donnie

LEO: I think he’s somewhere between 2010 and 2030. Mikey might be in the 1990s -Donnie

RAPH: I don’t know about you guys, but interdimensional travel is not a norm here -Donnie

LEO: Same. Its happened before but I wasn’t prepared to collect data -Donnie

CASEY: @Leo close. We’re Universe 2-0-1-8. And inta-dimensional travel and inter-dimensional travel is a norm here, but not inter-universe travel

.

MIKEY: Donnie says this is universe 19 90

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

CASEY: lmao look at this touch starved fool [5 attachments: couchcuddling.png]

CASEY: I didn’t know humans could turn that red -Mike

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

CASEY: WHATS UP BITCHES NEON LEON IS HERE

CASEY: forgive my brother he is easily excitable -D

CASEY: SO I HEARD YOU NEED PORTAL HELP -L

CASEY: Leo I swear to pizza supreme I will take away your caps feature -D

CASEY: boo no fun. You know we could be in the same room and not have to confuse everyone with two people talking from the same server -L

CASEY: I knew giving you access would be a mistake -D

CASEY: Just send that update video you and Mikey put together for their Casey’s friends -D

CASEY: [attachment: weekoneupdate.mp4] thought you all might like proof of life since Donnie is a horrible texter. Don’t worry about that last part I took care of it. -L

APRIL: the video quality is all corrupted and the only sound I hear is the words “it’s a hard knock life for us” on repeat -Don

RAPH: why is Casey on fire?

CASEY: I told you I took care of it -L

CASEY: he was trying to show off -D

MIKEY: the file won’t download

CASEY: rip -L

CASEY: I will boot you -D

CASEY: but I want to say hi -Mike

CASEY: and Raph wants everyone to know that he’s trying his best to keep Casey alive but that Casey is giving him gray scales -Mike LEO: Can we agree to keep this chat for getting you all back home data and planning only? -Donnie

LEO: how on earth did you get Casey to agree to a spa day?

CASEY: we have girls night once every two weeks. He either had to join or vacate the premises -D

CASEY: he really enjoyed himself! -Mike

CASEY: anyways I agree lets keep this /emergency chat/ open for data and updates only. Hey Leo -D

CASEY: Yes? -L

CASEY: Adios bitch -D

-------- CASEY HAS BEEN BLOCKED FOR 24 HOURS --------

MIKEY: you can block people!?!?!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

CASEY: [attachment: lakeprank.mp4]

RAPH: Donnie’s mad that wasn’t a emergency “im dying” video because he nearly had a heart attack when the whole lair alerted us but the rest of us are laughing so hard. Your April has a great reporter voice. RIP Casey Jones, for his dignity died today. -April

RAPH: also Donnie thinks its fascinating you all look so different/are different turtles. -April

.

LEO: I want to be mad because that also gave me a heart attack but that was funny af. Even through all the grainy quality -Donnie

DONNIE: well both us Donnies are pissed because the video can’t display on these ancient computers and we thought someone died since this is a /emergency/ chat

DONNIE: Leo when did you have the time to teach him 2010s text slang?

LEO: he’s standing next to me rn and telling me what to say -Donnie

.

CASEY: You are all the same turtle species? man your Draxums must be boring. At least ours has some class. Some finesse. Appreciates the art of presentation. What did yours do? Go to the pet store and buy the first four turtles he saw for his experiments? -L

APRIL: we don’t have a Draxum and April says her universe doesn’t either -Don

MIKEY: Never heard of the guy -Donnie

LEO: No draxum and we were never apart of any experiments.

CASEY: so you guys WERENT created through genetic engineering for the sole purpose of being a bioweapon/supersoliders meant to lead armies to wipe out humanity? -L

MIKEY: We were mutated on accident

RAPH: wtf

APRIL: I don’t know how to respond to this, but no we were not -Don

.

LEO: I told you their world was hardcore -Donnie

CASEY: really? Case Man says its pretty chill compared to his. Like he doesn’t have Run Of The Mill but he does have evil aliens so -L

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

[whonsper]

tell me about the slimariana zombie au??? :O

YOUR FIRST MISTAKE thank you anon i love you

okay so picture this. qsmp. quesadilla island. the sun goes down one day and doesnt rise the next morning.

its a slimecicle centric apocalypse fic, following him from day one when he gets on the island. when the sun goes down and he wakes up to the night sky still. opening the door to check around and hearing the ungodly sound of a horrid creature with sagging skin and too-stiff movements, stumbling ever closer to him. his first time having to kill one of these creatures, bashing its head in with the closest thing he could grab, which ended up being a wooden shovel. the loneliness he felt as he sat in his hole-in-the-wall house, too afraid to even open his front door.

the islanders try going to the federation, surely this wasnt meant to happen, what happened to their luxury island getaway? the federation either cant or wont listen to them, its as if they cant see it at all.

the egg event starts, much to the shock of everyone. why bring children into such a dangerous environment? why would they bring more stress and danger to the islanders lives rather than solving the existing issues? but they try to make the most of it, slime and mariana pair up with their kiddo and take care of juanflippo as best they can ("welcome to my house!" "...wheres the rest of it" "....this is it. but i promise, we don't need a huge space, and flippo is happy here, right?")

the story follows through the everyday struggle to survive, what with their steady depletion of supplies, the daily fights between slime and mariana, and the added stress of trying to take care of flippa. the danger shes in at all times, her excited screams echoing through the trees, the blood trickling from a scraped knee, all calls to the zombies to their exact location. but theyd rather see her happy and deal with the consequences than lock her inside, wasting away and miserable

theres four endings as well! im super excited about them, and i think everyone else will love them too (or hunt me for sport, but you know, thats a form of love imo)

i dont know how to talk about this in a coherent way, but have some tidbits and fun facts!

slimecicle is missing a hand after he chopped it off trying to get wood one day. it regrew as a nerveless slime hand, with which he can vaguely hold things but cant feel anything. he just has to trust that flippas hand is somewhere in his...

flippa and slimecicle learn sign language together, both english and spanish, to communicate faster (especially helpful when theres zombied nearby)

theres a whole messy relationship arc that does end with mariana and slimes wedding

[ionicthievery]

I know I'm probably screaming into the void and not even saying anything new but i like Scooby-doo a lot and im pretty sure people in my real life probably dont want to hear me talk about Scooby-Doo for like an hour so im talking here! The new Velma show makes me so sad. Scooby Doo wasn't originally a series with characters is was a cast of roughly defined character traits. There wasnt a plot or an over arching story a lot like sunday comics. That can kinda get on my nerves but is sweet and a good concept.

(When i was younger i couldn't stand old Scooby Doo but that was because i would get stressed out about old shows and couldn't handle laugh tracks.)

The newer stuff was my favorite and looking back it was really more because they were brighter colored and had better pacing but i think both are great!

My absolute favorite moments are when the characters work like a ernest team. They have history with eachother and live in a van so of course the bicker and fight and thats okay but those moments of real wholesome mystery solving shenanigans are where its at! Where they come to this problem and are all jazzed about funding out whodunit and scared that it might be a real ghost!

I know a million people have said this but Mystery.Inc is a great place to start if you want peak Scooby Doo. Theyre a team, they love eachother but theres drama (it get a little weird but 🤷🏻)

What it sounds like to me is the Velma show is deeply uninterested in making a Scooby-Doo show and just wanna make something people can hate watch or something? Im not entirely sure i understand the point. Scooby-Doo can be witty, sarcastic and sometimes a little mean but it always has come from a love for the original concept. I dont see any of that in Velma and thats what makes me sad. The next series might follow the tradition of taking a little bit from each show and its disheartening because i know Velma a show with what read as malicious hate towards its past iterations will have a some sway in how the gang is characterized! Which would be the distilled toxic traits of every character.

Velma is mean, doesn't believe in ghosts and smarter then everyone and hates them for it

Daphne is vain, vapid always the damsel

Fred is stupid and rich

Shaggy is cowardly, lazy and doesn't know what's going on

I hate that either make them well rounded like able characters, dont make the show or make them the classic cardboard cutouts they were originally meant to be! Augh

[single-malt-scotch]

me and my controversial topics will stay under the cut lol.

i know i blabbed lightly of this probably but obviously one of the things that put me off from mcyt for a few years was when the "rpf is bad" opinion started circling the internet more frequently, in tumblr's 2014-2016 toxic callout culture era. i think that era shifted YT fandoms as a whole and turned loads of ppl to presenting creators with their "characters" specifically (like i recall this early on w markiplier and jacksepticeye) and clarifying it often. but i find this all very amusing when 80% of the ppl dont actually play characters at all, and ppl are either just writing "rpf" or theyre just turned a creator into their own OCs. i think its sometimes just a way to not associate with the idea of rpf even if its like, right there.

like, the problem i think is that the majority of fans, namely the young teens that are the main audience, are very consumed by purity culture and being free of problematic interests in such a black and white way. i get it, i understand why you dont want to be associated with rpf. when i think of weird and uncomfortable rpf i think of.... fan fiction of the Beatles, or something. a band or a movie actor is someone we can easily define as "not a character" but... when it comes to mcyt, its a little more grey, because i know some of them goof around in games and do bits and exaggerate themselves.

and yet i still think its counter productive to get caught up in these woes, and to deny what exactly it means for something to be rpf, or have rpf elements. ironically i think the indulgence people have with making them characters worsens the parasocial/obsessive/skewed lens people have on creators these days. how? well its bc of how ppl get super attached to characters... comfort characters, kinning, etc. i love characters just an intensely, but when you apply this to a youtuber who like, doesnt actually play a character? even tho you wanna act like they do? .....there can definitely be issues in that and its def what makes me not get into the fandom as it is. you elevate them with your view of them as a character by being able to indulge in them way further bc they are kind of "yours" now. but also theyre not really.

but specifically back to the rpf vs not rpf topic- basically what i really intend to say is that like. there is harm in becoming too concerned over what youre writing bc you can fall into that mindset of being far too aware in a way thats just gonna make you feel terrible all the time (i experienced this myself when i was like 15 on tumblr and wanted to avoid any potential of touching something "problematic"). this post isnt to declare you are writing rpf, or you arent, or whatever the"rules" are about when it is or isnt, but just that theres always time to just accept shit as it is when the blurry lines arent actually doing any harm in this case. and that even trying to force yourself into the seemingly right direction doesnt exactly solve all the other problems either.

cuz i did all the things ppl would wanna call me out for and i dont care at this point. i wrote fan fiction where the guys where more characters than themselves, in a fantasy world for the server. but i also wrote fan fiction that was irl and based during minecon! and it was smut. and all i can say to that now is...ok. im not even gonna sit around and vehemently condemn it either? even if i never plan to do it again. cuz i dont see the need to punish my past self, nor do i see the reason to continue questioning the nuances of where the line between hard rpf and hard fiction lies with this bc its a never ending conversation. its just not worth my time to worry anymore. i know how to not be weird about it, i know my boundaries between creator and fan, i dont even get near the extent that some people do... i feel like im aware enough to feel like im not causing harm/can make logical choices when issues arise. i was a niave teenager before, and wrote such things with little thought, and had a much less healthy mindset about it! but the way the internet laid on the pressure of these strict definitions was the moment i felt shame, and as if i couldnt ever redeem myself from actions i understand far better now. its really not worth the stress and heartache to get so caught up in it.

[otherwisepurple1403]

You know, the thing I hate most about myself is not just that I make promises to people that I cant keep but rather that I make promises to myself that I cant keep either.

I started off my day so happily coz it felt like any other day while I was still making steady progress and then I become lazy thinking that if its so easy right now I'm sure ill finish the rest of it in no time.

Its an endless cycle... i work hard, im happy, im overconfident, i waste time, i hate myself for wasting time and realize i could hv done this earlier, i waste more time doing useless shit, i cry and then i get a little bit of motivation to get me going, i study, i do just avg or smtimes a little above avg and i becomes overconfident that im good at last minute studies but the truth is that i barely survive every time and die inside a little every time i hear that ppl hv finished the portion and that unlike them i was wasting my time. and then on top of that my parents keep bringing up how bad my condition was in an effort to motivate me but i just get reminded of every thing again, and i keep getting the motivation to be better but not the motivation to actually do it.

and then im reminded that im just making excuses but then i make the excuse that i cant do anything abt it but i really cant and theres this feelign of self-hopelessness that even i cant solve. i dont wanna be just avg with last minute i wanna hv good grades with proper preparation. and with the stream im pursuing later i might actually die

no heres the thing i dont wanna hv a phone its like me not wanting to like ###### coz i know its bad for me but im attached its not an addiction.. maybe it is its not an addiction, in the sense that i dont want it but because i hv it anyways i might as well just use it but the thing is that once i start using it i get trapped and i forget EVERYTHING the motivation to want to be better ? gone

not gone actually just forgotten temporarily stored at the back of my mind and then once i get off whatever is distracting me i realize the time i wasted like a month later, when exams r starting tmrw and im far behind and i wish i never had a phone but i dont want it to be taken away becuz now that i hv it i cant imagine my life without it and if i dont hv it while others do ill feel left out and ill want a phone even if i didnt want it just a while ago.

its not just insta and social meda its literally everything i will get hooked on the tiniest source of dopamine if it means i get to avoid smth i hate and i dont hate studying, i just hate the start of it , getting in the flow its so hard (thats what she said) the reality keeps leaving my mind when im thinking its so easy to forget i hv an exam tmrw. every second of the day, i hv to be reminded, otherwise i just forget. ill manage i know i will but i still hate myself for this confidence

Just Start im not a car i cant just start even a car needs a spark plug to make an explosion and push it forward but without fuel or air there wont be an explosion even if the spark plug tries its best. if the necesssary conditions rnt met the result will be either underwhelming (incomplete) or nothing. and underwhelming isnt enough to push the car ahead.

for some reason that i hvnt figured out yet i only work efficiently when im under pressure, but i guess that because 1) when im under pressure im constantly reminded of it and so i can focus and finish it off and 2) when im not pressured i procrastinate saying that oh i can only do this when im pressured coz i focus better under pressure and i take pride in that and become overconfident and then im like oh i can manage this last minute my future self probably cusses me out every single day

i hate how stubborn i am like why does my mind criticise itself for making bad choices and then make excuses for the bad choices and then criticise that excuse again and again its a loop im in a loop but then i think that im wrong for assuming that abt myself and not even trying to change it like how am i even supposed to break a loop ? especially when its so strong

then when i cant find anymore answers in my own behaviour i look around outside. at some point i thought that maybe when other ppl try to help me it makes me want to accept their help even lesser coz im stubborn and dont want to do things that others tell me. maybe if ppl stopped trying to help and i tried to help myself on my own, all alone, it will work. but then im just alone, and ppl misunderstand when i say i dont want their help and stop giving me support too i dont want help i just want the support to help myself but then again i dont know how to help myself. and if i cant help myself then how is anyone else going to.

is this really procrastination? or am i just victimizing myself?

[academicweaponintraining]

ermm what the flip dude!! um yea so im starting this blog bc 2 of my friends have blogs but im too lazy to do coding stuff so im just gonna have a tumblr :3 anyway today was actually fun because m wasnt here today so i didnt have to sit with her! lunch was actually pretty fun today bc d sat with me since her table was full, and then k and z sat with us too bc mrs w is SO strict during lunch for literally no reason.. d and me talked for the whole time but k and z mainly just talked with themselves, but they talked to me a couple of times. i literally DONT know what to do bc i can not sit with m for the rest of the year. its so boring everyday. and literally no one gets that i cant just leave her, because she would be sitting all alone! like i cant just leave her to sit alone. p doesnt get it, every time i say something about not being able to leave her shes like "just leave anyway, its not your responsibility to sit with her" and i guess thats true but I WOULD STILL FEEL BAD!!11!!!!1!

tw sewer slide

ok im literally SO scared bc i just read a's blog and (1) she relapsed again and (2) shes seriously thinking of k ing herself. i LITERALLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. because even if i wanted to tell someone who would i tell? the school counselor would probably just call her parents and im not doing that to a, her parents are like bad... but if i dont tell someone its basically my fault if she goes through with doing it. Ughhh i wish there was some way to make her life better because i just care abt her alot. genuinely dont know how i would be able to live without her, shes like the only good thing abt school. i dont know what to do because i care about her so much and i realy really dont want her to go but at the same time i just want her to be free of everything shes going through. but that makes it sound liike i dont care if she does it?? and i do!!! UGHHH I HATE THIS dude. i wish i could make eveyrhting better but i cant.

end of tw i just dont want to think abt this

bruh i wish one of my friends would update their blogs bc i think a is mad at me bc i didnt talk to her for some of the time we were at a basketball game. dude i dont know why but im so paranoid all the time that my friends are talking abt me. like im scared of a and s's messages because what if theytalk about me. ughhhhhhhh. lemme talk about something bc i dont get why its annoying me. so bascially this girl in my grade, she has like so many guys who like her and shes already gone out with a guy in our grade. and theres another guy who likes her and she likes him back and i dont know why but it makes me pissed. idk why cuz i dont have a crush on either of them.. idk i dont want to be mean but its so annoying how many people like her. like i know if i was pretty like her people would like me more. that reminds me earlier i was talking to d about how i better glow up this summer ( i HAVE to you dont get it) and she said that she would bully me into it if i wanted her to. she was joking but likeee maybe ill take her up on that offer. not literally bc i dont want my head shoved dwn the toilet ro something but i wanna ask her what i can do to be prettier. d is a very no bs girl so i feel like shell tell me the truth and she wont be like "nooo ur so pretty stop". i feel like some girls would def do that. honestly though my main problems i dont think can actually be solved, but here are my issues:

fat face

bad jawline

thin lips

gappy teeth

glasses

assymetrriacal eyes

yea i can only really change the bad jawline one...

anyway this blog was prob speled really badly and i should go to sclepp. bye blog:3

[dear-ao3]

hungary. round 13 of the 2024 world championship. we are now officially halfway through the season. and well. it didn't disappoint. why do i say this? well. in every possible meaning of it: welcome back brocedes (and others)

today is july 27, 2024 (yes I KNOW ITS A WEEK LATE I KNOW SPA HAS ALREADY STARTED IVE BEEN BUSY OKAY) and lets fucking go

now. this post is going to be a disaster. more so than the other ones. im terrible sorry about it but that is just simply the way that it is. when we get to the disaster part i will let you all know but look. its a double header, we're hurtling towards the summer break and ive, as ive said i think last time, had a lot of things going on so. please tolerate the disaster i beg of you.

there was a lot that happened leading up to the race that i am just going to speed run fly through otherwise we will be here forever and i dont want to be here forever

-ralf schumacher (michael schumacher's brother, ex f1 driver) came out as gay via posting a photo of him and his partner on his instagram

-he happened to do this literally while his nephew, mick schumacher, was driving his leg of an endurance race in brazil

-most of the drivers went to either the euros or Wimbledon. carlos had fun with the fact that spain won and england did not and left lando this note on thursday

-lando responded by blocking carlos's spot on sunday

-if you were charles leclerc you went to neither the euros or Wimbledon. you were photographed wearing a big floppy hat.

-charles also went to the eras tour in milan with his girlfriend, alex. and there he met up with pierre and his girlfriend kika. aparently, according to the two of them, this was entirely unplanned and they had no idea that the other was coming and just kinda ran into eachother. there were some funny pictures of charles on the phone waving around and looking for pierre

and then of all of them together

(they are kind of wearing matching outfits?)

-and this might have been at silverstone but charles was asked how leos training is going and he said that leo and wait and he can sit but he cant do much else. he doesnt turn around unless there is food and he doesnt know how to lay down because he is already so short.

-we also had the very much anticipated leo and roscoe meet up!!!!

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A post shared by Arthur and Ollie (@arthur__ollie)

-leo and roscoe also totally overshadowed pierre and kick getting a dog, a toy poodle named simba

-and max and checo won the MTV MIAW award for couple goals? apparently this is a latin american music award. and also apparently max and checo won. which is incredibly funny for several reasons, the first of which being that they are not a couple (i think they were the only same sex people nominated also? and maybe the only people who weren't actually dating)

-esteban ocon now has his race winning car in his garage

-esteban has won exactly one grand prix and that was the 2021 hungary gp and this year he also made his helmet themed after his trophy from that race

-someone else did the same thing and it was lando norris, though he didnt win a hungarian gp, he broke max's trophy last year.

-they made a whole big deal out of it and the trophies are handmade porcelain so lando went with max to get a new one for max and blah blah, big thing

-anyway, lando also made his helmet after the trophy to commemorate the whole silly incident

-other important f1 drama from pervious years in Hungary was when kevin magnussen told nico hulkenberg to "suck my balls" on live tv. clearly they have gotten over that feud.

-alex and logan tried and almost failed at solving Rubik's cubes

-and stake (and others) continued to be goofy and insane when the severe rain storms earlier in the week flooded the whole paddock

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A post shared by sofia¹⁶ (@f1.sums)

-the rain storm ripped the roof off of the mclaren hospitality

-oscar said that "last time our motorhome caught on fire, lando put it on pole"

-which will take us right into silly season (yes i know im probably missing things, theres a lot to come here ok, just deal w it)

alright so lets just fly through this

first and foremost haas announced that kevin magnussen will not be re signing with the team in 2025, this is likely to make way for esteban ocon, who is heavily rumored to be going to haas, though no announcements have been made about it yet.

who is replacing esteban at alpine? well we still dont know. pierre hinted that it could be carlos sainz as he said in the press conference that "i welcome the fastest guy, we all know who that is" carlos meanwhile was asked if he had made a decision yet and he said "ive been busy watching the euros and i havent taken a decision. sorry." though he is probably waiting for a seat still from either mercedes or red bull. its unlikely that he will get a red bull seat, but mercedes could be back on the table as toto wolff said later in the week that his gut instinct is to wait on signing anyone (more on this later).

of course, jack doohan and mick schumacher are still on the table for seats, if not at alpine then elsewhere. mick did some testing this past week. one was a tire test for mclaren which had nothing to do with anything silly season. they had to do some mandated pirelli tire testing, in order to do it the person driving the car needs a full super license and meet some other requirements (which mick does) and none of McLaren's test and reserve drivers have a full super license and instead of bothering lando and oscar during the triple header they borrowed mick under the engine agreement because mclaren uses mercedes engines and mick is the mercedes test and reserve driver.

and he also tested for alpine along with jack doohan. apparently (according to alpine and toto wolff) he kinda knocked peoples socks off and went way faster than jack and teams like alpine and audi and williams are all some level of interested in him. audi having interest in him is not really surprising as mick is german and they have already signed nico hulkenberg who is also german and they are a german team. we've seen teams do this (have an all nationality line up) when entering the grid before, most notably with nico rosberg and michael schumacher at mercedes when they first started as a team we we know it back in 2010 (?).

which then takes us to liam lawson who ran a test in the red bull at silverstone (which is exactly what daniel ricciardo did last year) but aparently liams times were underwhelming and he was .200 off of max (which is not good enough in modern f1), and considering that perez was not instantly swapped as happened with daniel and nyck de vries last year, it seems that wont be happening.

and in any case, sergio perez said during this weekend that "Even if I win the race or even if I finish last. I have a contract with the team and I am going to fulfill it.” yuki tsunoda very clearly said that he thinks he deserves the seat next to max and said that if they chose liam, "it would be weird." but yuki has never been given a red bull test (daniel and liam both have) and christian horner pretty much said well one say it could happen, "you never know." but as we know, checo might have those stipulations in his contract saying he cant be more than 5 places or 100 points behind max in the championship by spa (next race) so who would replace him? the only other option is daniel ricciardo who said "i have two races to kick some arse and thats where my energy is right now" why two races? well because helmet marko said that "we wait until the next race in spa and then we make a decision."

and there you have it. silly season is sillying as per the usual.

now there is one thing that i have yet to mention, that is only adjacently related to f1 and it is this:

yes. that is in fact nico rosberg. aside from being a world champion, and the only person to beat 7 time world champion sir lewis hamilton in equal machinery, he also has an insane youtube channel which is pretty much dedicated to cars and f1 and environmentalism and vlogging and whatever else he feels like. anyway its been like over a year since hes posted anything. and he close. the middle of the hungarian gp week. to make a reappearance.

the video came out slightly later in the week and it is here. and just a quick tangent here about the video: he basically took his f1 engine from when he was in f1 and put it into a street legal mercedes hyper car. and aside from looking like there was light and joy and happiness in his eyes, he decided to paint the car silver. at first glance you might be thinking oh that is a normal shade of mercedes silver. incorrect! it is not! aparently he gave them a random code of color and was like hey i want this and didnt say why so people were like yeah alright probably just a good color. false. wrong. incorrect.

nico rosberg is good at one thing and that one thing is being absolutely fucking insane. so the color code was for a ferrari color called grigio ferro. a FERRARI COLOR on a MERCEDES POWERED CAR. nico. buddy. what on actual earth. (you know cause lewis was the mercedes driver and hes going to ferrari and yeah how can one not read into it?)

anyway. so we have nico floating around. and the weekend was shaping up to be another insane race. what could go wrong? (hint: a lot)

lets get into practice.

specifically practice 3 because i didnt watch 1 or 2. (charles ran into the wall in practice 2 and idk what else happened) and i only watched practice 3 because i was on a train stupid early and watched it live. and i was half asleep on this train and was like yeah ok ill watch the boys go vroom.

so there they were, they being crofty and ted, talking about who the favorite was (lando) and the car performance and the temperature when suddenly:

"now i am going to jump in here unannounced” said a certain blonde 2016 world champion, knocking the socks off of everyone

thats right everyone. not only is nico rosberg back vlogging, he is back in the paddock commentating for the first time since china. and since everyone on here has made it well known how much they like hearing about nico, im going to include him as much as possible (tho thats what will lead to the impending disaster later.)

and he had, as usual, a whole lot to say

the first thing that he chose to speak about was checo perez and his mental health

checo, as know, is getting speculated about left right and center by everyone and their mother about what's going to happen with his red bull seat. his teammate is max verstappen, arguably the best driver in F1 right now and perhaps one of the best ever.

nico rosberg, as we also know, was notably teammates with michael schumacher (admittedly, at the end of his career) and sir lewis hamilton. he knows a thing or two about being overshadowed by your teammate.

and so he said:

nico: “it’s difficult to see the mental struggle and for someone like perez now in this situation it’s really really hard yeah cause you into this big negative spiral uh you start to doubt yourself you have one of the greatest of all time next to you that’s verstappen um so… the media pressure starts as well in every press he’s at he’s like there’s fifty people in front of him saying are they gonna kick you out next race or how long will (you stay there)” crofty: “so can you empathize with sergio perez cause you were up against one of the all time greats as well? and you found a way to beat him over a season and become world champion?” nico: “well of course i can empathize that’s why i’m talking about it. i was in the same position!” crofty: “so what does sergio need to do then?” nico: “it’s it’s really uh it’s hard…of course work super hard and also a bit of luck that you hit the ground running on a weekend a fresh you know? and that you need to just find those little positive momentum’s to go back in an upwards spiral also the expectations are really re set. so now anything like within 3 4 tenths of max verstappen can already be a success so that also helps cause the expectations at rock bottom so that can help get him back into a positive momentum.” 

despite checo's poor recent performance, nico also pointed out max's recent performance when the graphic flashed up on the screen saying "well thats not a very good run there...well we just saw max verstappens race results and it was a very unusual picture with a 6th in there and a fifth and a two wins and a second which is great. great for all of us.” great as in, it is entertaining.

there was also discussion about lando and mclaren

“mclaren and lando are at least as strong as max at the moment but have not maximized their opportunities," nico said. “max already knows how to fight for the win he’s done it so many times with lewis. lando needs to still learn and he’s learning quickly” 

then, we started to have some runs on the soft tires. previously everyone else was running on the hards. and esteban ocon put some softs on, but was still .8 off of max, who was on hards.

nico did not hold back: “that’s looking like quite a struggle so far unless of course they’re running a lot more fuel but um i wouldn’t assume that so it’s a bit strange”

he also had a lot to say about the return of flavio briatore:

“but what a comeback we’ve seen from flavio briatore at that team, hm? he arrives at the track and the team jumps 10 places ahead instantly, have you noticed that?”

at first, crofty chalked this up to a coincidence but then asked, “what does he bring to a team like alpine?”

and nico once again was brutally honest: “well it’s such a mess over there that you really can do with an experienced hand as a consultant who takes a look from the outside and says ok listen this and this and this worked best in our day when this team was the best team in the world we should try and work back towards that. he also will definitely play a role in the drivers i’m sure of that. he can be very helpful”

it wasnt too long after this that pierre spun off the track, claiming that there was something wrong with the front brakes

and it was on a soft tire, which was bad because according to nico: “i was just going to say there with pierre gasley locking up into turn one that’s one of the horrible things that can happen in fp3 cause you ruin one of your sets of tires. cause it gets flat spotted and vibrates so much in the front that you don’t learn anything.” 

then nico told some very insane story about how james vowels, back when he worked at mercedes, would only call nico "rosberg" so nico only called him "vowels"?

the camera then panned to a banner that someone had made:

crofty was speculating about whether or not toto was a cat person or a dog person and nico said "well he loves the flag”

crofty was confused “he loves the flag?”

“yes he seems very happy about that," nico said because aparently that is a pleased toto face.

nico also praised george, saying that he was doing "magical laps" while once again psychoanalyzing Lewis's driving down to the exact amount of tenths that he lost in each corner

and then he started to pull out the stats:

“well let’s remember lewis this is one of his best tracks, or one of his best with 9 pole positions but it’s also a track where i think george is extremely strong cause he put it on pole here just..two years ago? with a car that did not deserve pole at all so he’s also extremely quick here” 

and if you're thinking, oh he just knows everyone's stats. incorrect.

because they started talking about fernando alonso a few minutes later and:

“but qualifying was never his (fernando’s) strength cause he only has twenty three pole positions? crofty if you could pull out the stat?” “uh he has got 22 pole positions” “22, which for the career fernando had that is surprisingly low. versus his thirty plus, what is it thirty race wins?” “…32” 

i rest my case.

then the teams started putting in the fast laps. george and lewis both did fast laps. lewis on a new set of tires and george on an old set of tires. but despite the fact that lewis was on a new set of tires, he was still .2 seconds behind george.

nico started arguing with crofty over it: nico: “but this is a brand new set compared to george’s old set, yeah? and it looked all over the place that lap also so lewis…..” crofty: “but it’s an improvement of sorts to be 2 tenths back instead of 6.5 tenths back” nico: "sure but now george was only able to improve by what is it two tenths? his own lap? something?” crofty: “he’s gone one tenth up”  nico: “yeah ok so then it’s not so bad for lewis to be just over two tenths behind that’s still acceptable at this point in time you can still make that up in qualifying.”

lando did a fast lap. and just like in china, nico continued to be president of the lando norris fan club:

“wow i was like shaking my head through that lap that was phenomenal to watch no that was phenomenal to watch that was so close to perfection between driver and car, magical, like as you said it was just the exit on the very last corner where there was a Slight imperfection with the rear stepping out cause the rear was blazing hot obviously by the end but wow incredible”

max also did a fast lap, but he was not satisfied with it. he was shaking his head as he crossed the finish line. this might prove to be an omen for the rest of the weekend.

and max was followed by checo, who continued to have an underwhelming performance

“wow miles away." nico said. "even on the hard tire he was 8 tenths off verstappen and now six tenths off still which is kinda where weve seen him lately but still so far off wow” 

as far as the stand outs after practice? it was ruled that was daniel ricciardo, alex albon, and nico hulkenberg of the back marker cars. and then the two mclarens and max. lewis and the ferraris were not stand outs.

lewis then proved he was really not a stand out by sprinting out and going in the grass briefly.

“yeah this is not what you want to have happen before qualifying obviously cause you can tell that he’s not in the sweet spot and thats really not a nice place to be in,” nico said.

and then, well, practice was over and nico's services were needed elsewhere.

"we will see you and your shirt on screen in a few moments," crofty said to nico.

and what shirt was he referring to?

this one

yeah idk either guys.

and. nico nearly harassed toto and george threw peanuts at them:

but anyway. we dont really have time to unpack that

qualifying

and heres where the disaster begins.

this race weekend saw the return of a lot of dynamics (brocedes, sebastian vettel and mark webber, multi 21, mad max, etc etc.) so theres gonna be some interspersed lore in here with the everything else thats happening. and to top that off, nico rosberg was still commentating, but he was commentating on sky sports italy. and i do not have sky sports and i dont speak italian so i was watching crofty and martin and ted on the international broadcast so theres going to be weird intercut scenes and quotes from nico mixed from the other broadcast and yea. disaster. try to keep up i guess????

anyway. it was raining.

which aparently no one saw coming?

but it was raining for around an hour. and it was Damp. so could go inters. could go slicks. regardless, it was crunch time to get a lap in before the rain hit again.

despite the fact that rain was only Approaching, the track was still slippery, as logan sargeant demonstrated as he went off track, but managed to rescue it before he hit the wall.

mercedes was really having an absolute time of it. lewis was up in p1 meanwhile george was way down in p14. right on the cusp of getting knocked out. rain was coming in.

max was also not having a great time. and he was getting angry about the weather and the strategy over the radio, which is pretty typical of max. over the radio he said, to his race engineer, gianpiero lambiase (gp)

max: mate i dont think we can improve like this gp: what's your concern, the temperatures or the- max: the rain! THE RAIN! gp: okay. calm down max. then if youre concerned about the rain we can box, we cam come back to the garage its not a problem. you were talking to me about tire temps.

that plan pretty Immediately went out the window though because there was a big crash and crofty screamed "ITS PEREZ HES IN THE WALL"

and he was indeed

this was exceptionally bad news for checo. it was, as Martin said "the last thing that sergio perez needed today"

and nico, over at sky italy, speculated that potentially, checo's damages due to crashes could be costing red bull updates due to the cost cap

this sparked some more Speculation about checo's future and crofty said: “we get a lot of comments that are like when are you going to stop speculating about sergio perez’s future? and the answer is when he stops having moments like this. because there have been a lot of these.”

then ted said: “we’re not (speculating) it’s red bull who is and we are reporting on it that’s all we’re doing. when you’ve got helmut marko the special driver advisor at red bull saying that in terms of drivers ‘everything is open’ then we’re just reporting that they’re doing it but yeah christian horner's gonna have to have a round to his kitchen for another cup of tea isn’t he?”

but. the car was cleared. the track was damp. and qualifying resumed. there was some speculation that it might rain again and nico again bitched that engineers “will look at the radar to check if it's raining instead of just going outside.” reguardless all eyes were on one george russell, who as i said was down in p14, and came out on new softs

there was speculation from crofty that the cars were going to be fueled for three to five laps, so that the tires could get up to temperature by the last run.

five cars started on track but then gradually everyone came out, except for esteban and pierre as the result of a bad strategy call (the pit lane was saturated) (nico called this strategy "foolish") , and checo obviously

george though, came in just as the track was really starting to dry out again, which was surprising.

not as surprising though as daniel going fastest, a whole .037 seconds ahead of lewis.

and then! bottas knocked george russell out of qualifying.

george owned up to it on team radio, first saying "i’m sorry everyone that one is on me” and then later saying “why are we not putting enough fuel in the car to complete the session guys? traction is getting better and better” 

toto later said it was mostly the teams fault, but george stuck true to the statement that he shouldn't have put the team in that position for the rest of the weekend.

over on sky italy, nico had some interesting things to say about george getting knocked out:

“... you know hamilton is happy about that. george has been doing better than him all weekend and now he's out...” [other commentators make shocked noises] “... maybe that was too blunt. i should have said, hamilton is sobbing over russell not making it into q2?”

george was interviewed during q2 and here was what he had to say about the ordeal:

george: “well there’s two factors. the first was i didn’t do a good enough job at the beginning and that was why i was down in p15 and then the next one was we put the new tires on at the end and we didn’t have enough fuel to complete the session and i was on track when it was wettest and when it was dryest i had no fuel so it was a disaster from both aspects we should have gone through comfortably on that last lap but we had no fuel so as i said that was on me for being in the position in the first place.” lawrence: “that’s an unusual mistake to make isn’t it?” george: “um. yeah. it’s not our usual standard for sure. but yeah we need to go through it, i need to understand what happened at the beginning but i mean having enough fuel for the whole session is a fundamental so we uh as a team we made a big error.”

the only other interesting thing to happen in q2 was that charles came very close to hitting the garage when he pulled out and crofty said "now that is either incredibly fortuitous or the most precise piece of driving charles leclerc will put in all weekend long”

and well. we've all seen his parking.

oh and! logan sargeant made it to q2! for the second week running! he was happy about that. alex albon, his teammate was not happy though that he didnt make it to q3 because he thought he would have been able to if he had been able to go out again at the end. this was the start of some of the Bonkers Strategy Calls that we were going to see throughout the weekend.

which takes us to q3.

and it was going to Rain

which meant speed run! to the track! get in a lap as fast as possible!

max got the ball rolling with a 1:15.555. and he was complaining about his front win. oscar tried to beat him. he failed by .308 seconds. but lando DID beat him and put himself on provisional pole with a 1:15.227. by now it was raining in the pit lane. people were getting antsy.

and yuki crashed!

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nico made a joke about this. what the joke was, i am not sure, but one of the other commentators told him "your COLLEAGUE is IN THE WALL!! BE NICE!!"

he was okay! but there was a red flag

lando was on pole still, oscar was .022 behind him and then max was .046 off of oscar

and then something interesting happened

obviously there was a red flag and obviously it was starting to rain more. but there was still enough time in the session left for everyone to be able to just barely have enough time to go out again.

despite this! max and fernando started getting out of their cars and taking off their gloves and helmets, clear signs that they were not going to be getting back on track (yes, drivers sometimes do this during red flags and can still get back in the car but this was not a particularly bad accident and so it would heave been impractical to get out of the car)

fernando threw a bitch fit about it, throwing his clothes literally on the ground as he complained about how the fia had handled the red flag and he said later that he thought he could have been able ti improve his time if the fia had handled the red flag better, but thats not the point here. the point is that george russell walked past the bitch fit filled with swagger, only to turn around and go back because he remembered that he has a job and its to listen to the drivers complain. (hes the head of the drivers union)

but max and fernando both ended up getting out because they were "reasonably sure that they would not improve their lap time"

meanwhile. oscar.

he was waiting on the pit exit to be able to go back on track, smack in the middle of the queue behind lando and lewis. his race engineer, tom, came over the radio and said:

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then after that he said

"priority here oscar is not getting any sporting infringements of penalties. so that means not excessively impeding cars in the pit exit."

and oscar had the perfect reaction:

once everything got up and running again it was a mad dash to the start line. or well. kinda. the two mclarens took their sweet time to slow down the other cars. nico was asked what he thought of it and he said "I think it's fine but they change the rules so often I can't keep up." the order was lando, lewis, oscar, Daniel, lance, charles and carlos. everyone but carlos made it to the line and time and.....no one improved upon their times except for daniel who moved into 9th.

so all that kerfuffle was pretty much for nothing

but! we had a mclaren front row lockout! with lando on pole and oscar p2. and the mclaren twitter admin got a little bit too excited about this:

now this is clearly a very bongled stat. this is the third time mclaren has locked out the front row in hungary but the 64th time in the teams history that theyve locked out the front row. the tweet was soon after deleted.

lando said in his post race interview that he was expecting to win. oscar said that they wanted to get a 1 2. and max said “of course i love competition but i would like to be on top of the competition” 

nico had a prediction on sky italy and it was "Lando not even bothering celebrating pole position... I bet that tomorrow, by turn 2, Max will have overtaken Oscar and be second. After turn 2.”

this was right in line with what nico said earlier in the week that "ive heard rumors that the middle eastern bosses were very much fuming because a couple of wins have been thrown away now/"

that though did not stop him from rambling on about the "amazing grip" of the mclaren

and now before we get into the race, unfortunately we need to talk about some back story. and that back story is Sebastian vettel and mark webber.

sebastian vettel, as i have talked about before, is an ex formula 1 driver, most notably for red bull and ferrari, a 4x world champion, the youngest ever world champion, bee enthusiast, environmental enthusiast, and also the proud owner of several terrible pairs of shorts.

mark webber, as i have also talked about before, is an ex formula 1 driver most notably for williams and red bull, oscar piastri's manager, australian, notable number 2 driver, and he coined nico rosberg's britney nickname

the two were teammates at red bull for the entire time sebastian was there, from 2009-2013 (though i think mark was there from 2007? on?) this was also during the time that seb won his 4 championships from 2010-2013.

by all accounts, sebastian vettel was an absolute menace on the grid but especially in his red bull days. and this was exemplified by nothing better than the infamous multi 21 incident at the 2013 Malaysia gp

so now, briefly, cause we still have a. whole race to get to, lets se the scene. (this is a really shit a brief retelling of the story, if you want more detail i implore and beseech you to google it)

seb is a 3x champion at this time, 25, and absolutely dominating the sport

mark is a 0x world champion, basically just seb's number 2 driver, 36, and in his last year in f1

seb was starting on pole, mark p4 and then both mercedes (nico and lewis) were behind them. mark ended up taking the lead from seb early on and towards the end of the race both cars were told to hold position, which we now know as the multi 21 instruction. (mark was car 2 seb was car 1, car 2 must remain in front of car 1)

mark was on older tires, seb was on newer tires. marks engine power was also turned down slightly and i think he was told that seb was going to slow down as well. this was not the case.

with 13 laps to go, seb passed mark, defying team orders and winning the race.

over radio, seb was told "this is silly seb, come on"

as he was trying to get past, mark said "yeah thats good teamwork!" (he had been told the race was his) and he got the following response "okay mark, he was told, he was told!"

over radio after passing seb said "i was really scared, main straight. all of a sudden he was moving and i had to lead the line, to repeat, i had to get over the line"

after he had won, sebs race engineer said "good job sebastian, good job. it looked like you wanted it bad enough, but there will be some explaining to do"

in the cooldown room after the race, mark said "multi 21 seb" *throws hands in frustration* "yeah, multi 21" *slams down water bottle*

seb said nothing and angrily chugged his water bottle

on the podium mark said "in the end seb made his own decision and will have protection as usual and thats the way it goes" (seb told mark at the next race in china that he had no respect for him as a person after making that comment)

and seb later did apologize for it in a post race interview, saying "i put myself above that decision today, i didnt mean to i can only you know, say sorry, apologize, i know it might sound very dull now to mark and to the team but its the truth"

their relationship had already been rocky, and it was never really the same again after that

years later, mark said he wasnt angry about this but more sad that the team had reached that point. many have pointed out that sebs actions were likely payback for the previous year's championship deciding fight in brazil when mark squeezed seb against the pit wall at the start, which seb was really angry about. malaysia was at the start of the 2013 season, so it was only 2 races after brazil, despite the fact that it was separated by several months.

seb was ultimately not punished for the incident because his lawyer sent red bull a two page letter a few days later saying that the team order breached his contract because it had been an unreasonable team order.

so thats, basically, multi 21.

lets also remember that mark webber is none other than oscar piastri's manager. mark webber was a very very infamous "number 2 driver" (with him even saying "not bad for a number 2 driver") meaning that youre just there to help your teammate win. he has said or implied before and of course i cant find it that oscar has it in him to be a number 1 driver and win championships. this will all come back in a few minutes.

lets also also remember that who is in the paddock this weekend? nico rosberg. the very same nico rosberg who was involved in one of the most insane and intense teammate rivalries in f1 (we've been over this before but in case you forgot, nico and lewis battled head to head for three straight years at mercedes, destroying their childhood friendship, playing mind games with eachother and actively trying to sabatoge eachother in order to win the world championship. lewis won the first two of those years, nico won the last year and then announced his retirement from f1 at the prize giving ceremony)

nico also made a prediction for who he thought was going to win:

and there had been speculation that the infamous rosberg curse had been broken last weekend when lewis won after nico predicted that he would, but we will see.....

also, prior to the race, max had stayed up late and by late i mean until at least 3 am to do a shift of racing for his sim racing team. this is not the first time that max has done this, he also did this before imola and everyone was fine with it. max also won the race in imola (albeit by like .7 seconds or something but he still Won)

and with all that in mind. the race.

our starting order:

lando norris oscar piastri, max verstappen carlos sainz lewis hamilton charles leclerc fernando alonso lance stroll daniel ricciardo yuki tsunoda nico hulkenberg valtteri bottas alex albon logan sargeant kevin magnussen checo perez george russell zhou guanyu esteban ocon pierre gasly

and i think pierre started from the pit lane? yes no maybe idk?

what i do know is that the race started and lando Immediately lost the lead

like Immediately

to oscar

so oscar was p1 and lando had been trying not to hit oscar so he went a little bit wide which caused max to react and go off the track. max rejoined the track in front of lando in p2 which lando and mclaren said was leaving the track and gaining an advantage.

"max has to give back the position!" lando said over the radio.

max was pissed about it over the radio and said that he was shoved off and refused to give the position back. max of course didnt know that lando had not been shoving him off the track and literally had nowhere else to go because he was trying to not hit oscar. so the incident went to the race directors

max was told rather sternly to let lando past on lap 4. and he begrudgingly did. there was no further investigation.

"okay, so you can just drive people off the track then?" max asked over radio. "then you can tell the fia thats how were going to race from now onwards. just driving people off the road"

and everyone that statement was very exciting for all of us because it meant that mad max was making a reappearance.

who the hell is mad max?

well that would be max verstappen, but more angry.

prior to dominating f1 for the last 2 years, max had plenty of angry radios, but since he hasn't been fighting too many people for race leads or been stuck in the mid field recently, we havent heard too much of it. until this weekend. and believe me, there was more to come.

speaking of the midfield, they were starting their pit stops. albon, k mags and ocon pitted on lap 7 while alonso ricciardo and zhou all pitted on lap 8. which was a little early for some for pitting, but they still did it.

mostly because the undercut is strong here. meaning that you pit before your enemies for best results. supposedly.

with all the pit stops though, checo and george had made it up to p11 and p12 but were now very effectively stuck in the mid field. and by lap 12 everyone who had pitted already was lapping faster than them.

speaking of undercuts, hamilton who was in p4, went for the undercut on max, pitted on lap 17 and came out behind yuki in p7. over at sky italy, nico rosberg yelled excitedly "it's got to be hammertime now!" lando, still up in p2, also pitted on lap 17.

max, meanwhile, was having problems. "i cant brake, i cant enter corners, front and rears" despite these apparent issues, max kept driving the car

it was at this point when they started bringing up that max had been sim racing for awhile the night before.

meanwhile, oscar was still out in p1 and he had built up an 8 second lead over max who was in p2 since lando had pitted. oscar pitted on lap 19.

checo and george did not pit. they were still stuck behind yuki in 8 and 9th.

also not slaying was aston martin. fernando and lance were down in 12 and 13. they started on soft tires and were now trying to get past nico hulkenberg. they were failing as of lap 27. but on the next lap fernando managed to get passed when nico locked up.

"CAN LANCE GET PAST TOO???....no." crofty yelled

and also also not slaying was williams

their tire strategy was leaving much to be desired. it was a little hard to figure out what had happened but they basically told alex one tire strategy initially and then changed it mid race kinda without notice. he was less than pleased.

"we're now thinking were going to have to go to plan b" his race engineer said

"yeah" alex said "but i dont appreciate when you do that. and now the tires are dead. we're just too indecisive."

for some context, alex was able to get 5 spots up to p9 at the start of the race, then had a really slow pit stop and this call ultimately led to him being stuck on the same very dead tires for 40 laps. worry not everyone, this was not the last bad strategy call that was made this weekend.

while all that was happening max and carlos had pitted. max came out in 5th behind lewis.

checo finally pitted on lap 29 right along with pierre, daniel and alonso.

and yuki pitted, for the First time i might add, on lap 30.

this was another weird ass strategy call because by the time daniel had pitted twice yuki was only just pitting once. and this was generally a two stop race. and 70 laps. hm hm. maybe it'll pan out for daniel whos to say!

oscar meanwhile had managed to get back out to the front and was ahead by 4.413 seconds on lap 33.

on lap 43 lewis was under pressure from max. over at sky italy, nico rosberg had a lot to say about that:

"you cant imagine how difficult it is to have verstappen behind! right now lewis has to give it his all!"

and while that battle was happening, pierre retired his car on lap 35. for the SECOND week in a row. due to a hydraulic leak.

oblivious to that though, lewis and max kept battling. max briefly got past lewis but he went wide and lewis was able to pass him back.

again nico had a lot to say. (not sure if this was said specifically here but im making educated guesses). one of the other commentators said that lewis gave up his position, and nico disagreed: "no no! he braked early and max simply braked late! lewis did not give up anything!"

max got back on radio after locking up: "im minus five brake bias and this thing just doesnt fucking turn its undriveable"

crofty was unimpressed with this. "he sounds like a man who could have done with a better nights sleep last night"

and over on sky italy, nico was saying similar things. though he was saying it a bit more unhinged.

"last night lando's bed time was 11:05. wake up at 8:05. so hyperprofessional. at the same time you have verstappen, who until 3am was sim racing. thats a bit disappointing. it shows hes too used to his ease of domination."

and why did he know lando's exact bed time? aparently he called him??? baffling man. anyway.

hamilton and leclerc pitted on lap 41. and we havent talked about ferrari too much i know but that was mostly because they were actually having a pretty decent race. and by that i mean that other people were fucking up far worse than they were. though, nico rosberg did compliment charles's tire use.

they both came out in fifth and sixth behind sainz and verstappen

max was once again, unimpressed.

"its quite impressive how we let ourselves get undercut, and just completely fucked my race," he said.

that was not what ted thought tho. he said "max does not have a car that hes comfortable with." hm.

meanwhile. as interesting as that was. something else even more interesting was about to happen. and that was that lando was about to make his second pit stop.

this was interesting because as i said and as max brought up, the under cut is powerful here. at the very beginning, lando was also told that his fight was Not with oscar with first, but with max for second. and then, a few laps before his second pit stop he was told that he could fight oscar. hm

in any case. lando pitted.

this was aparently to protect against lewis in p3.

nico rosberg, undoubtedly reliving the silver war in real time, said "they should then let piastri pass him, let's see how they manage it"

oscar was told not to worry about it when he came in two laps later on lap 47 for his pit stop. he was told not to worry about lando because they were going to reinstate the order.

lando was now ahead of oscar.

max was leading cause he hadn't pitted again yet, then lando and then oscar.

on lap 49 lando was told to give the position back at his convenience. remember that this is a 70 lap race. that is plenty of time to swap back.

on lap 50 nico rosberg was once again loosing his mind: "i would be worried in piastri's shoes! we'll have to see what lando does ... and they told him, let him pass when you want, i'd do it on the last lap!"

he also predicted how lando would swap the position back (if he did):

"he's gonna slow down. he's gonna make it so obvious. he's going to humiliate him... kind of like Lewis when he was asked to give me the position and was bitter about it"

max went to box and came out in fifth so now lando was leading.

and he was still pulling away from oscar. oscar who he was supposed to swap back with.

lets get a little refresher on the driver's championship standings. while we wait for lando to give the position back.

max: 255 points lando: 171 points charles: 150 points carlos: 145 points oscar: 124 points checo: 118 points george: 111 points lewis: 110 points fernando: 45 points lance: 23 points nico: 22 points yuki: 20 points daniel: 11 points ollie: 6 points pierre: 6 points kevin: 5 points alex: 4 points esteban: 3 points guanyu, vlatteri and logan: 0 points

so. max and lando are only 84 points apart. first place gets you 25 points. second gets you 18. hm. all things to think about.

"once you get to lando we will swap positions" oscar was told over the radio. which is Not what they had told lando, btw. lando was told originally that they would be swapping positions.

nico rosberg once again had things to say: "im suffering with piastri! because theyre telling him, if youre not as fast as norris, we might not let you past! ai ai! horrible!"

he also criticized McLaren's inability to give unclear instructions, saying "im not in agreement with mclaren's strategy, you have to be precise in your instructions"

meanwhile, there was some speculation that mclaren might have to keep lando in front because max was picking up speed again.

max disagreed with this though. gp tried to be positive with him over the radio and max said "no mate dont give me that shit you guys gave me this shit strategy, okay? im trying to rescue whats left"

crofty once again said "not to be critical but it sounds like max stayed up too late playing a sim race which he did and got up early to do a sim race session with he did instead of getting a good nights sleep" and then anthony davidson came on and defended max, saying "the last time max did 24 hours of sim with his team he won the grand prix. some of us dont need that much sleep."

max though was oblivious to all of this as he tried to pass charles but failed. he was trying to very politely pass charles as well, because charles as we all know will not hesitate to send max off the track and into a wall if provoked. he finally managed to get past him on lap 57.

lando had still not swapped back the positions. but he had gotten a whole earful from his engineer about how much he was over using his tires in pretty much every corner.

on lap 57 lando was told "lando we still think youre using the tires too much...i know you'll do the right thing." the gap between him and oscar had grown to 3.876 seconds. lando hadn't actually responded in awhile during all the tire talk and they did a radio checo to make sure he could still hear them cause they thought that was the problem (he could hear them)

this is when multi 21 started to get brought up. you remember, multi 21 from the Malaysia gp between sebastian vettel and oscar piastris very own manager, mark webber?

"oscar piastri's manager has a thing about team orders not being followed" crofty said. they also said that it would have been a breach of trust if lando didnt switch back.

meanwhile, nico also had things to say about the multi 21 comparison: "when you feel like your team is giving more importance to your teammate, that's a horrible feeling" and nico would know this first hand because again he was half of the great silver war.

10 laps to go. lando was still out in front. 4.7 seconds ahead.

"okay lando," will, his race engineer begged over the radio. "10 laps to go. both cars are using tires too much. remember every single sunday morning meeting we have, okay?" basically saying, remember that oscar has been there for you in strategy before, you need to be there for him now.

lando was not phased. "okay well then tell him to catch up please." lets remember that lando is nearly FIVE SECONDS AHEAD RIGHT NOW

nico rosberg had started to leave the commentary box because he had to get ready to interview the winner, but when that radio came back through he ran bACK INTO THE BOX AND SCREAMED

"guys LITERALLY COPY OF WHAT LEWIS USED TO SAY! when they'd say "let nico pass" "well he needs to come get me first". FOR REAL COPY AND PASTE SAME WORDS."

and aparently when he was asked why he wasnt leaving to get ready for the interviews he giggled and said "I CANT LEAVE NOW FOR SURE IM STAYING HERE!"

he did eventually leave though, sadly :/

and lando's race engineer was still losing his mind. "lando, he cant catch up, you've proved your point."

but that was briefly abandoned because max decided to take red bull gives you wings literally:

he locked up and bumped into lewis, and it was flagged for causing a collision.

miraculously, max kept racing, but he was now definitely behind lewis, actually 2 spots behind lewis in 5th. and he was pissed.

"yeah, i moved out of braking" max said over radio.

gp was kind of done with him at this point. "im not even going to get into a radio fight with the other teams, max. its childish on the radio, childish."

the crash was hard enough to trigger the sensor that requires drivers to be checked by the medical team post race. so gp came back on and said

"i understand the medical delegate neds to have a look at you and examine you."

max was having none of it. "we can send the medical delegate to the stewards team and they can have a look. see if they are all okay. im absolutely fine."

regardless of all that though, nico did give us his thoughts on this crash in the post race show:

"im assuming here that maybe max hasn't seen it (the crash) yet on tv? otherwise someone needs to tell him that there was actually a corner which is why lewis was turning in? i mean, lewis was taking the corner."

regardless. there were now five laps left. and lando had still yet to give the spot back.

"lando," will begged again. "there are five laps to go, the way to win a world championship is not by yourself its with the team"

this is about when crofty started saying that “would lewis hamilton move over, would max verstappen move over, would fernando alonso move over? lando is coming of age and learning to say no. i’m your number one driver.”

mclaren though were simply not having it. despite the fact that they were the ones who had put themselves in this situation in the first place.

and oscar, who had been quiet this whole time, finally said on lap 66 "the longer we leave this the riskier it gets"

by lap 67 will was absolutely Done with lando. "Please. Do. It Now."

and so on lap 68, lando finally slowed down on the straight, and let oscar by. "you dont need to say anything." lando said over radio.

lando did manage to stay within DRS of oscar, and for a quick second everyone thought he might try to pass him back again, but he didnt.

and so, OSCAR PIASTRI WON THE 2024 HUNGARIAN GP!!!!

his post race radio though was anything but celebratory:

"well done oscar, well done. checkered flag. really good." "yep. thank you everyone. thank you very much. thank you for the coordination. sorry i made the swap a little more painful than it needed to be but yeah thank you, appreciate that. well done. come good points. really good weekend. first f1 win. thank you everyone, thank you, thanks."

now oscars a very chill guy so no one was expecting him to be insane and celebrating but it was still a little more subdued than everyone thought it would be. people are usually screaming and cheering. this was anything but.

and will buxton (who was not present this weekend) tweeted pretty much that:

anyway. that aside. we had the interviews. for the top three.

who were the top three?

oscar, lando and lewis. lewis was in fact celebrating his 200th podium in f1 (the record)

and who was conducting the interviews?

why none other than NICO ROSBERG!

yes. a brocedes interaction in 2024. a real live brocedes interaction in 2024. who would have thought.

idk when the last time these two spoke publically was, but i know its been awhile. and this did not disappoint:

and yes it was a very nice and civilized interview and once everyone got over the holy shit theyre Talking aspect. well. lewis fucking WINKED at nico at the very end of it.

brocedes, no one will ever be as insane as you.

while that was happening, oscar did the p1 sebastian vettel finger

crofty was beside himself about it

also really quickly because it is in fact 1 am and i do need to sleep but ted lost his mind over the hat that oscar was wearing. cause pretty much everyone at mclaren was wearing one. and ted had a right proper crisis over How the hats were made when When they were made and Where they came from and it was really quite funny please watch it

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charles also came over to congratulate his son

also, in case you were wondering, lando was the first person to congratulate oscar on his win:

and they had this moment while lewis was getting interviewed:

so they seemed to be okay? whos to say.

especially because this happened in the cool down room

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so lets unpack that.

first lando chucks to p2 hat ala nico in the cool down room 2015 in cota right after lewis won the world championship:

and then kinda insulted lewis. which btw, no one (not even lewis) really blamed him for because hes still coming off of his adrenaline high. racing cars takes a lot of work.

the podium was also interesting.

oscar first shielded his trophy from lando (because you know lando broke max's last year) and before lando champagne popped he gave his trophy to an official to be taken off stage so that he didnt accidentally break it

this did not stop oscar from holding his own trophy as lando popped his champagne.

although! lando did not spray oscar! he sprayed lewis! interesting!

lando, of course, was hard on himself again for the race result and i cant find what he actually said but i can find nico defending him:

"well lando is always a little bit, hes on the more sensitive side psychologically and also he criticizes himself a lot even on the start you know now on the start he criticized himself but actually it was the shift that caused the bad start and the shift is most likely not him, actually its 100% not him if thats the case he always exaggerates i find with criticizing himself."

one things for certain tho, the rosberg curse is clearly still very much a thing.

(as a very brief aside, aparently they asked nico what he thought of lewis going to ferrari and he thought it was an april fools joke)

despite all the drama though, oscar said later that he thinks that mclaren can definitely win the constructors championship. and andrea stella (the mclaren team principal) said that he trusts "lando 100% and ultimately he made the right decision"

(zak brown, the mclaren racing ceo, was i think at the indy car race this weekend, mark webber (oscars manager and multi 21 victim) was at the formula e race, oscars girlfriend was also not present and his mom was not at the race because she never comes because they scare her, but she did tweet that her 6 am pilates class was cancelled, likely because she would be celebrating)

this did not stop nico rosberg again from interviewing andrea stella and really giving him a piece of his mind.

i cannot find the exact quotes but it was something to the nature of ANDREA WHAT ARE YOU DOING PLEASE YOU NEED TO BE MORE CLEAR WITH YOUR INSTRUCTIONS PLEASE BELIEVE ME I HAVE EXPERIENCE IN THIS ANDREA PLEASE

and andrea, to his credit, was just like. okay. yes i trust you. i will take your advice. you have experience here.

nico was still Displeased though

but enough of that. lets look at some of the other flops of the weekend. cause there were many.

so, this was the finishing order:

oscar, lando, lewis, charles, max, carlos, checo, george, yuki, lance, fernando, daniel, nico, alex, kevin, valtteri, esteban, and guanyu

so we've talked about the top 3. Ferrari, somehow, given everything that happened seemed like a big happy family of a team. which is saying a lot when we remember everything ferrari's been doing recently.

checo also had a pretty good race. p16 up to p7. and so did george, p17 to p8 and he took fastest lap.

yuki ended p9, which was good. he had started p10. but his teammate daniel, who if you will remember is trying to potentially be on deck for the red bull seat (though we dont know if there will be a swap because daniel is horner's pick and helmut marko wants to leave checo blah blah bureaucracy) finished p12 after starting p9 because of the shitty tire strategy he had been put on. remember, he was called to pit after a very short first stint on the mediums (he pitted when people who had started on softs were pitting) (and came out in traffic in a drs train) and ended up doing both of his pits before yuki had done his first.

ted even said post race about daniel:

"Not the greatest strategy in the world. It was not Daniel's fault that he was P12. Some people would say that but there was nothing he could do about it, Yuki had the better strategy so ended up P9."

there was even briefly worry that daniel was skipping media. which was pretty worrying because even when daniel was getting fucked over left right and center at mclaren (thats another post entirely), he still came to all the media sessions. but he did eventually appear.

moving on from that. aston martin. they also aparently had team orders, but their team orders got ignored.

fernando was told to let lance past to try to get past yuki. if lance could not overtake, then he was supposed to give the spot back. he did not overtake yuki and he did not give the spot back. so lance ended in the points and fernando did not.

and we already talked about williams

there were a few other things that happened post race. nico rosberg got incredibly pissed at the sky sports team for trying to get him to back liam lawson as the best replacement option for checo at red bull and he said something to the effect of: SURE! YES! HES THE BEST CHOICE MAYBE. VERY HIGH RISK THO. ITS A BAD IDEA TO PUT A ROOKIE INTO A RED BULL SEAT

speaking of rookies, kimi antonelli won his second f2 race, but he did openly admit to the press that he's not sure if he's ready for f1 yet because he is still learning a lot in f2 and he s not doing everything correctly yet. and ill have you all know that i tried to find the link to that article and my google literally froze. its time to wrap this damn thing up. tho he will be testing the mercedes again after the belgian gp

and max verstappen had a lot to say after the race, mostly in response to what people said about his angry interviews

"i not know why people think you cant be vocal on the radio," max said. "this is a sport"

max was also banned from late sim racing before gps by red bull. which is kinda funny. cause that was the squeaky wheel that needed the grease!

and carlos also defended oscar's win and the swap, because his own first win also had a lot to do with team orders.

and i really think that the last thing that i need to talk about is oscar's post race celebrations. which he said were not very glamorous because

"we had a flight back from budapest that was significantly delayed and then flew into a different airport. i didnt get home until about 5am and my girlfriend was waiting at home for me. spent a few hours with her that were asleep and that was about it. had mcdonald's - we were flying back with a few of the drivers, lando was there, alex albon, a couple of others. in our wait for the alway we got a cheeky maccas, ad a big mac, got home at 5am and that was the celebrations. just a couple of f1 drivers, getting some burgers and nuggets really. we didnt take any trophies or anything, not that you can put anything in those trophies anyway. we had three or four hours of delays and there wasnt any food around so mcdonald's was the nearest and the most convenient thing so that was what we chose."

he also said that he and lando "were good" because they shared mcdonald's and "we were playing monopoly on the way back on the plane, were all good apart from alex albon teaching us a thing or two about monopoly!"

about not having his family there, oscar said "of course its nice to have people that are close to you there, but its impossible to predict where youre going to get good results so its just luck of the draw of whos there in some ways. marks not missed many races in y f1 career, maybe three or four. he was very busy with mitch in london, so i dont blame him at all for going to do that. but i got to see lily that night, a little bit later than id planned, but it was still nice to go back and see her."

and despite the fact that it was clouded by all the team orders drama (just like how oscars first sprint win was clouded by max winning the world championship) oscar piastri is still a race winner. he had excellent moves in the first corner and was able to hold p1 until the team made the terrible pit stop decision. oscar and lando both deserved to win, but it is mclaren here that is really at fault.

reguardless. oscar piastri is a race winner.

last but not least, a very very big shoutout to everyone who posted quotes and clips from nico on sky italy and on the post race show. i didnt tag anyone cause i would hate to crash anyones computer or phone opening this post but i did link everything if anyone is curious :)

and i will see all of you very soon in our last race before summer break: spa

Sorry i tried to scroll past but, i know nothing about f1 other than max verstappen is fast, my dad doesnt like lewis hamilton, fast car goes in a loop and sometimes expodes. Could you give me a crash course in f1 drama? Im very intrigued. Whats the tea as it were?

a terribly loaded question, but i will do my best. i’ve talked about some of the drama before like the red bull second seat and the chronicles of haas but allow me to briefly try my hand at explaining the nightmare that is the upcoming silly season

under the cut we go

silly season is when the drivers go through contract renewals, extensions and switches. usually it’s confined to the first half of the season (march-july) but it has been known to extend all the way to the last race of the season and they like to switch people around at random sometimes. driver contracts are complex, there’s a lot of money involved and basically You Are The Face Of The Team so if you have a shit season then you make the team look bad. but at the same time you could have a shit season because you have a shit car. it’s sticky stuff.

so. there are only twenty seats in formula 1. 10 teams. each team gets two drivers. (there’s also reserve drivers but we’re not going to get into that). who ends up with a contract is largely up to the teams, they can pull the contract out from under people they can also cut you mid season. they’ve done it before.

of the 20 drivers on the grid, 14 of them have contracts expiring at the end of the year. yes. 14. you see how this could get complicated.

so let’s meet the teams.

red bull racing. they came first this year (and last year) in the championship. like aggressively first. like they won the championship by over 350 points. they are definitely the team to beat. but if you end up with a seat at red bull, you do have to deal with max verstappen being your teammate and he won all but three of the races last year. he’s the golden boy. red bull are also notoriously silly when it comes to contracts and famously swap people mid season who aren’t performing.

mercedes. merc is home to 7 time world champion lewis hamilton and they have won the championship a great many times, though not since 2021. they are kind of in their flop arc and their car the last 2 years has been pretty garbage, but they have still made it work because they were able to come in second last year.

ferrari. god help the poor little meow meows with a ferrari contract. ferrari is a notoriously great team and they’re trying to get back to the top again but their strategy every single time has fallen short. to the point where their drivers are the ones doing the strategy in their cars while driving. they came in third last year and have been decently consistent at getting first in qualifying and then getting beat by max verstappen on race day.

mclaren. they’ve definitely worked their way up over recent years. they ended fourth last year and have had some championship wins before but not nearly as many as say merc and ferrari. their team ceo (owner? director?) is a little interesting and their car started out a pile of flaming hot garbage at the beginning of the year but they did manage to get their shit together.

aston martin. they are owned by canadian billionaire lawrence stroll, father of lance stroll (one of the drivers for the team). they’ve undergone several name changes over the recent years (force india, racing point, etc). they positively slayed at the start of the season and then one day they sucked. they finished fifth in the championship.

alpine. the frenchest french team. they’re (i think?) still partially owned by the french government. both of their drivers are french. (their drivers also hate eachother but we’ll get to that. just know they’re in the middle of a modern french civil war). they had the opportunity to have a good rookie driver (oscar piastri) this past year but in a thrilling twitter battle, he publically flamed the shit out of them and went to mclaren instead (and slayed). they're usually solidly middle of the pack. they ended sixth in the championship.

williams. williams has been one of the back of the grid teams for the last many years but they have finally started to get their shit together and don’t quite suck as much as they used to. all of the points this year were scored by only one driver though (except one but we’ll get there). they came in seventh.

alpha tauri. they are the sister team of red bull. so technically redbull owns both teams (meaning they can swap drivers between teams. they like doing this.) they’ve just kind of been There for awhile but they did slay towards the end of the season when one of their drivers led the race for several laps. basically tho, this team is the gateway to redbull. they came in eighth.

alpha romeo. recently renamed to stake f1 team (but sometimes they are going to be called kick sauber. this is a whole other drama post and i’m not getting into it). they’re also just kind of there. generally unproblematic. seems that really great drivers who get ixed out of a contract for a younger driver end up here or young drivers who are in their early years are here before they go to a better team. they ended ninth this year.

haas. oh haas. goofy team. they suck. point blank they suck. they keep loosing sponsors because they suck, they don’t win ever (one time they came first in qualifying last year). they cursed themselves in australia in 2018 by not tightening their tires and its been downhill ever since. they came 10th. their team principle got let go (fired?) who’s to say today.

so those are the teams. it is important to note that:

-there is a cost cap. each team is allowed to spend no more than 135m per year.

-not all cars are equal. some things are standard. they all undergo the same testing. but the cars are all very different. so you can be a good driver but stuck in a shitty car. which makes it impressive if you are doing well in a shitty car.

let’s meet our drivers!!!

starting with the guys who’s contract is not ending in 2024:

max verstappen. 3 time world champion. 26 years old. general beast on the track. he dominated the whole season. he’s currently racing for red bull and has a contract with them through 2028.

lewis hamilton. 7 time world champion. 39 years old. he drives for mercedes. he will not leave mercedes until he retires. he really really wants to win an 8th world championship and is willing to stick it out a few more years as long as merc still believes in him. his contract expires in 2025.

george russell. the other merc driver. 26 years old. hes aggressively british and says thinks like blimey unironically. walking meme. got his merc seat in 2022 right when they entered their flop arc by getting his tractor of a williams to finish second in qualifying in the middle of a rainstorm. his contract expires in 2025.

lando norris. mclaren driver. 24 years old. he has notably never won a race in his five years of formula one (mostly because right when his car finally was good enough max verstappen was 20 seconds ahead of anyone) but he is regarded as Very Good. he has only ever driven for mclaren. and even though there is another year left on his contract there is mass speculation that he will not renew his contract with mclaren after it expires and he may move up to one of the top teams (red bull, merc, ferrari) (tho i think he doesnt hate himself quite enough to go to ferrari). his contract expires in 2025.

oscar piastri. the other mclaren driver. 22 years old. this was his rookie season and he positively slayed. like people compared his rookie season to lewis hamiltons rookie season. he also had the positively funniest start to his rookie year because alpine announced that he would be driving for them (he had been their reserve driver and in the alpine academy) and he posted a tweet that basically said yeah thats false i never singed anything with you and im going to race with mclaren instead (he dodged a bullet) and then alpine tried and failed to sue him for $4m USD. he signed a contract extension with mclaren this year and his contract expires in 2026.

lance stroll. aston martin driver and son of the aston martin owner. hes doing ok, tho there was conspiracy that he wanted to quit and have a tennis career awhile ago. but basically since his dad owns the team it seems that hes guaranteed a seat for as long as he wants one.

so now. moving onto the good shit. the people who have contracts expiring in 2024. hold onto your hats people.

charles leclerc. (everyones favorite slutty little soup can). 26 years old. he is currently at ferrari and he has been since 2019. notably, he was given the longest contract in the history of ferrari after a stellar rookie season at sauber (renamed to alpha romeo, renamed to stake f1) where he got the tractor of a car consistently into the points. having the longest contract in the history of ferrari was a flex at the time, but now its likely how he will introduce himself at therapy sessions. ferrari have fucked this man left right and center up the ass with a plastic lunchroom spork. hes talented, he can drive, and he can drive well. but the strategy that ferrari has absolutely sucks. either something is wrong with the car (see him blowing out his gear box on the formation lap in monaco, his car completely crapping out and spinning into the barrier in brazil before the race even started) or they fuck up his pit stops or put him on the wrong tires and honestly its just frustrating. but will he leave??? likely not. you'd have to pry ferrari out of his cold dead hands and at this rate that might be where this is headed though there has been some minor speculation of him going to another team like merc or red bull, but merc doesnt have any open seats and red bull is a whole other dumpster fire of drama. ferrari are going to have to pay him a boatload of money to make him stay.

carlos sainz. the smooth operator. 29 years old. ferrari driver. previously carlos was at toro rosso (renamed to alpha tauri), renault (renamed to alpine), and mclaren before signing with ferrari. he has been at ferrari since 2021 and has voiced that he would like to stay with them for however long he can. there is speculation that lando might replace him at ferrari (but landos contract is not up until 2025) and there is also some speculation that alex albon might replace him. while charles is clearly the golden boy at ferrari, carlos is slightly slower but also definitely consistent. he was THE ONLY non red bull driver to win a race this past year, in Singapore after max verstappedn was knocked out of qualifying by alpha tauri reserve driver liam lawson (more on him later) and because he basically came up with his own strategy in the car while he was driving.

sergio perez. aka checo. red bull driver. 33 years old. and oh boy here's where we open the can of worms. checo was previously at racing point (renamed aston martin) and it was very near the end of the 2020 (?) season and he was out of a contract. he had a bonkers race where he was knocked to the back of the grid and then overtook everyone and somehow ended up winning (there is more to that story but just trust me) and christian horner, red bull team principle, mr ginger spice and definite disney villain called him and said congrats sir you have a seat at red bull! well. fast forward. hes been causing problems. problems as in crashing a lot, generally not doing great and pissing the crap out of red bull. it is basically guaranteed at this point that he will not be getting a contract extension. there was actually talk this year of him losing his seat mid season to one of the alpha tauri drivers, because remember, red bull owns both teams and they can switch them whenever they want to (and they have!) but ultimately this did not happen. even though checo has a seat at red bull until the end of 2024, its mass speculated that he is going to get switched with an alpha tauri driver, probably daniel ricciardo (more on him shortly) mid season because there is a speculated clause in daniels contract that says that if checo isn't performing well in the first few races daniel is getting his seat.

daniel ricciardo. 34 years old. alpha tauri driver. man oh man what a guy. outside of being the prankster of the paddock, he has one of the most batshit careers of anyone currently on the grid. he started out at red bull and was showing real talent and skill and was on track to win things (and was!) and was there until the end of 2018 when max verstappen (his teammate) started getting preferential treatment and also red bull started having a lot of problems with their engines (which were being outsourced from Renault (now alpine) and another team on the grid) and well very very long story short he made the surprise move of the century and decided to sign with Renault (which makes no sense they're the one with the engine problems) and was there for 2 years before moving again to mclaren where he was reportedly not treated very well and had a hard time driving the car so they mutually ended his contract with them early and he basically retired at the end of the 2022 season and became a red bull reserve driver. then halfway through the 2023 season alpha tauri ixed one of their drivers, nyck de vries, because he wasnt doing well and promoted daniel back up to a full time driver at alpha tauri (which we know is only a step down from red bull) but then he broke his hand in a crash in zanvort (?) and then he was replaced for a few races by formula 2 driver liam lawson (who we will also talk about) and then he came back to finish out the season in alpha tauri after he was cleared. daniel has admitted openly that he never should have left red bull and he was given bad advice to do so. hes towards the end of his career at this point and its well known that he Really Really wants to finish out his career at red bull again. he and max have already been teammates before and they do work well together and daniel is great driver (see his comeback in texas (or maybe it was brazil?) this year). so. Pretty Sure that daniels going to get either an extension at alpha tauri or go up to red bull. thats what we all want. get this man in a red bull we need him there biblically.

liam lawson. now technically liam is not actually a formula 1 driver. hes a formula 2 driver, but he was daniels replacement for five races and there has been some speculation and some confirmed news about him so hes getting included. when he was racing for f1 he was at alpha tauri. hes 21 and looks like he belongs in the movie grease. no one was expecting him to slay in formula 1 and he positively knocked everyones socks off. the scene: Singapore. which, if you'll recall, is the one race that a not red bull driver won. this was largely because liam lawson slayed the absolute game in qualifying. the qualifying part of racing determines what order the cars start in on the grid for the race and theres three parts, the first two parts the bottom 5 drivers each time get knocked out and then the top 10 complete for the last 10 spots. liam lawson knocked BOTH max verstappen and checo perez out of qualifying in the second round by going very slightly faster than them, effectively fucking up red bulls race and allowing carlos to win. and he also scored points in that race, which no one was expecting. now thats all fine and dandy, but here's the speculation: hemlut marko (im pretty sure) (who is somehow decently involved in the decision making at red bull though i couldn't tell you how) said that he thinks that liam lawson will be in an f1 seat no later than 2025. meaning that he will probably get offered a contract this year. and hes already raced for alpha tauri. red bull have sunk a good amount of money into him. they clearly want him. so if he gets offered an alpha tauri seat in 2025, that means theres a good chance danny rics is going to red bull. do you SEE how the plot here is THICKENED

yuki tsunoda. age 23. currently at alpha tauri. and fun fact, the only alpha tauri driver to race there the whole year. he had three separate team mates. he is slaying and hes often slept on. he has a bit of a temper and likes to shout on the radio and also hates working out (they had to force him to move to italy or something to work out, long story) but hes been kinda killing it. he led several laps in the abu dhabi race this year and hes decently consistent. people think theres possibility that he could get moved up to red bull on account of the fact that he is younger than daniel and clearly has more years in him,, but there is also possibility that he might not because red bull like to make stupid decisions. and if he doesnt get moved up to rebel, will he stay with alpha tauri? we don't know.

alex albon. age 27. currently a williams driver. alex albon is another one with a batshit career. he started out his rookie year in 2019 at alpha tauri then got moved up to red bull halfway through the year when red bull decided that pierre gasley wasnt doing a good enough job (more on him later) and stayed with red bull for a solid year and a half until he lost his seat in 2021 to checo. he has been with williams for the last two years and is basically carrying the team. like. williams as a team scored 28 points this year. and alex albon scored 27 of those 28 points. and as we know, williams is still kind of in their shit arc (though they are doing much better. they didnt score any points for a solid 2 (?) years. so this is an improvement.) and if you can get a shit car to perform you catch the eye of bigger teams. now, alex has already been a red bull driver. and he was on the cusp of podiuming two separate times when lewis hamilton ran into him. this (among a few other things) basically killed his chances at getting resigned at red bull because he wasnt ""performing"" and red bull are bitches who love to win. but some people think that red bull should give him another shot. like daniel, hes already been max's teammate and he can definitely drive. but theres also talk he might go to ferrari because ferrari think that he might compliment charles's driving style (or something). but going to ferrari at this point is kind of suicide. so.

logan sergeant. age 23. the only american on the grid. the other williams driver. he just finished his rookie year. he scored a grand total of one single point this season, in texas, and it was because charles leclerc and lewis hamilton both got disqualified because the floor of their car had more wear (by literally less than millimeters) than it was allowed to, bumping him up from 12th to 10th. he has never done better than alex albon. he was also the very last driver to get a contract for 2024, with williams waiting until i think december of 2023 to announce his contract extension. clearly, hes on thin ice. but people have also said that he needs time to get used to formula 1 (other people have pointed out that oscar piastri slayed his rookie season this year and this statement about needing time is largely false). where logan ends up next year though will largely depend on how well the 2024 season goes for him.

fernando alonso. 42 years old. many people like to point out that oscar piastri is actually younger than fernando's racing career. he won tiktok creator of the year (somehow) and is also a 2 time world champion. he retired a few years ago, just to show back up again and slay. during the first half of the season when aston martin had a zoom zoom car he killed it, and then they had problems on top of problems and he didnt do well. except for that one race in brazil where he came in third, beating checo by literally .05 seconds. he hasn't really made any hints about retiring a second time and he is kind of carrying aston Martin right now (he scored 205 points this season, coming in 4th and tying in points with charles leclerc, lance stroll only scored 74 points this year.) and they did have their best year yet this year. (though they are relatively new).

pierre gasley. 27 years old. french. drives for alpine. the french team. previously he raced with toro rosso (now alpha tauri), then got promoted to a red bull driver in 2019, then halfway through the season they decided he wasnt doing a good enough job and he got demoted back down to alpha tauri. then he won a race with alpha tauri just to stick it to red bull. after the great oscar piastri contract twitter war, he was signed as alpines second driver, with Esteban ocon being the other driver (more on him soon). estie bestie and pierre (both french) were childhood friends and now hate each other for unknown reasons and basically feuded on the track for most of the season. french civil war at alpine. he scored 62 points in 2023 and came in 11th. not really sure where he will end up, it is possible that he will stick it out at alpine.

esteban ocon. 27 years old. also french. currently driving for alpine. another one with a silly bonkers career. he started out at force india and had a baller few seasons there but his teammate at the time was checo, and checo didnt really cooperate with him too much and caused some drama that cost estie bestie some places and some points. max verstappen also beat him up in the garage once. thats not really relevant but it did happen. anyway, after the owner of force india was arrested for .... i don't remember what maybe it was embezzlement or bankruptcy or something money related, the team was backed by lawrence stroll and became racing point. but all of that happened mid season and lawrence was basically like look ill back you guys for now but next year my son gets a seat (lance) so one of you two (checo and estie bestie) have to go. and ultimately they let estie bestie go even though he was more consistent because checo had more sponsors and they needed money. so he was out of formula 1 for a few years (but was a merc reserve driver) and then went to Renault, which then became alpine. he did come in 12th though overall this season, just behind pierre. so. will alpine keep both him and pierre and keep the civil war going? whos to say.

nico hulkenberg. 36 years old. haas driver. in his 200+ f1 races he has never been on the podium and he really really wants to be on the podium. unfortunately this will never happen in a haas because haas fucking sucks. and everyone knows it. he is getting towards the end of his career though. though! stake f1 will become the mario Andretti and audi team in 2026 (don't question it) and they have supposedly voiced interest in nico. so we will see if he hangs on that long to end up at audi. for now tough, hes definitely hating it at haas. though, haas are going to have a different team principle next year so maybe that will change things. i have a sneaky feeling through that haas will probably end up with another 2 rookie drivers because everyone else is smart enough to not race for them.

kevin magnussen. 31 years old. haas driver. hes another deeply interesting character. he has had one podium. in his rookie season. in his first race. and none since. kevin started at haas in 2017 and then left at then end of 2020 when he basically got kicked off because the team needed money and they wanted to bring in drivers with more sponsorships. these drivers were mick schumacher and nikita mazepin. so kevin basically was forced to retire after the 2020 season. this went decently well for haas. until russia invaded ukraine right before the start of the 2022 season and, well, nikita was Russian and it was never distinctly proven that his dads company (who was sponsoring the team) wasnt also funding the invasion. so nikita got fired and they were literally like 2 weeks out from the start of the season, down a driver. who are you gonna call? kevin magnussen! and hes been back ever since. but hes clearly getting annoyed with haas. there was one great clip from this year where his car caught on fire and he kind of just stared into to, clearly hoping it would burn for a long time. so the likelihood of him extending his contract is looking slim.

valtteri bottas. 34 years old. currently a driver for stake f1 (alpha romeo, kick sauber, whatever you wanna call it). previously, he was a mercedes driver and notoriously helped lewis hamilton win a great many championships, until he lost his seat to george russell in 2022. there was a rather awkward part of the 2021 season where valtteri knew that he was out of a merc seat the following year and kind of just chose violence. he slayed. then he went to alpha romeo, grew a mullet and made a calendar of his ass. quite the glow up if you ask me. hes also very interested in cycling. honestly though, i have my own personal speculation that hes going to retire at the end of this year.

zhou guanyu. 24 years old. driver for stake f1 (alpha romeo/kick sauber, etc etc). hes doing alright. he just finished his second season, in his first season he was majorly out qualified by valtteri but this past season he managed to out qualify him a good 6 times. which is decently good for the tractor of a car hes driving. its possible that he could get a contract extension, but like logan, its probably going to depend on how the 2024 season goes for him.

and thats all the drivers. theres also a few others i didnt talk about, like some other f2 drivers who want seats and mick schumacher, who is currently a merc reserve driver, all of which could be contenders for f1 seats. but one things for sure. this is going to be the silliest fucking silly season.

feel free to add on and peer review me

[bubsub69]

Entry 8

28/05/2023 15:49

I'm trying to move on from her but it's really hard, i messaged some people but even on the first one i was shaking over the send button, because i don't want to move on, i want to wait for her to reply, i want to be with her, no matter how hard she ghosts me, but yeah i still sent some messages, 3 from reddit and 2 on chaster, no replies yet but its not really looking great

its so frustrating to browse through chaster as well, i was looking for some locks with interactions and theres so many people there that are findoms, fucking hate that shit, just want to have an actual relationship not talking to someone that treats this as her job, but considering the ratio of sub guys and dom women its kind of inevitable, just browsing through personal subreddits that shit becomes so clear, a shit ton of M4F posts with no upvotes and the few F4M ones all have at least a couple of upvotes, which is also what made me really like her in the first place, she picked my shitty 6 line introduction over the 10 paragraph essays of the charming princes, maybe she liked how im a person of few words or just how even in introductory text im a shy mess, but i guess after meeting me she changed her mind..

Still waiting for her to start a conversation, literally anything even just a hi just showing that she cares about me but i guess thats asking too much, conversation hasnt progressed after she said she was moving and her twitter still doesnt have anything besides her first tweet so i cant stalk her from there either. I guess i just have to be patient and wait for one of the messages i sent yesterday to get a reply of something os just keep trying to find someone else, but im so tired of waiting, i keep telling myself to be patient but im sick of being patient, yesterday was the 1 month aniversary of talking with her and im still only have 1 video call with her and this marks one week of not talking to her at all, i dont even know how to start a conversation with her anymore, i cant ask her if she found a house it obviously doesnt take a fucking week even if she is squatting at an ex's house, and now that i think of it how does she have an ex in portugal, did she seriously already date and breakup with someone in her time in portugal? i guess she was here for a bit before she permanently moved here, i probably couldve asked her about that but asking that a week later is weird. back to the waiting and patience i guess, my favourite.

Since im in a this marks x mood this was also the biggest interval where i didnt write in here and i kinda know why. For some time i thought i got the sadness™ from post nut clarity but during chastity i constantly had the sadness™ and was fine for a bit after the cage broke and i gave up, (speaking off i tried glueing it but it broke again.. twice so rip to the ring i guess) but this i was busy with the security project and hanging out with people helped me to not be a sad fuck, i laughed and cracked some jokes, you know being a normal human being, but it just goes to show, its like all those greentexts say, having a girlfriend wont solve all your problems, and in my case its having friends but i guess im too much of a useless fuck to get those either unless its in a work context.

[otakusheep15]

hi im the same anon :)

honestly that hc u have is pretty solid and i even had a thought that he might be autistic. Did he had a life similar to silver where he was isolated from most people. Also its interesting how he comes from sunset savannah instead of the shaftlands despite him being based on the snow white story not the lion king. Do u think because of his origins he couldnt really fit in with most of the people ( and the most people being beastmen) but wasnt really accepted so he started copying or trying to find out how they get along the best. But at the same time, it makes sense for rook to be from there since the place is filled with beasts and he is based off a huntsman after all.

'his off-putting nature stems from a lack of social skills.' yep i agree as well honestly a lot of unsettling stuff he says or does wouldnt be so unsettling if he expressed them in a more appropriate way.

also someone told that they hc that rook is a noble which makes sense considering he is elegant enough to be a prince (if we change his haircut tho) and if he is a noble maybe like malleus he didnt grow up around the people he probably should at his age or no people. and because hes a noble nobody dares to approach him and he couldnt really reach out or connect to them. but at the same it doesnt because i dont think the huntsman would've been a noble. If he was, why was he sent to do the dirty job not his minions

also i have heard that many people consider huntsman as a false antagonist. as as he tried to kill snow white in the first place, but he actually did it out of fear of queen grimhilde aka the evil queen, who threatened to execute him if he would fail. so i think they went with that interpretation and gave rook light magic.

"an interesting character design to him, both in looks" i mean his looks is interesting...but should i be worried about your taste in men.

"at least a side story that delves more into his character." yes i hope so too uk like obey me they have a side after finishing the main story theres a part where u could go to the opposite storyline and find out about the bts. id like something like that and maybe that showcases him going through his development.

side note, im still a student who is mandated to take the subject english language even if i want to drop it. I citied them because thats the way we kinda do stuff when we have solve questions etc and thought hey wouldnt it be easier if the person understood it in more context and thus using the way to use the method ive learned in school.

I love the autistic Rook hc actually. Honestly, I think most of the characters could be labeled as autistic, but maybe that's just me. I think it would be interesting if he grew up similarly to Silver. I do remember during the Halloween event Rook mentioned one time where he got lost in the woods and spent time with wild animals, and the story seemed like it could have been based off of the Jungle Book, but maybe that's just me. But, either way, that story does seem to indicate that he was either neglected as a child or just liked adventuring on his own. As for why he lives in Sunset Savannah, most of the characters are pretty scattered about in terms of location. I know Cater, despite being a card soldier, lives in the same place as Vil and Jack, so Rook definitely isn't an outlier. I think him being there might represent how the Huntsman abandoned his home with the Evil Queen after helping Snow White. Maybe his parents (or just Rook himself) moved out to the Savannah at some point during his childhood, but that's only a small theory of mine, and I doubt it's true.

The headcanon of him being a noble is interesting, but I don't think it really works. He just doesn't seem like the type, and him being the huntsman doesn't line up either. I personally like the idea of him just lacking proper social skills much better. Also, when I mentioned his character design, I more meant how he looks despite living in the Savannah. Like, I wouldn't think someone who lives his life would look so prim and proper lol, not that I find him attractive. However, as I was writing this out, I did also remember that Rook was in Savanaclaw during his first year before moving to Pomefiore because of Vil, so I think that might be the reason.

As for a side story about his past, I wouldn't mind a vignette of him talking about his past. At the very least, I'd like for him to elaborate more about him switching dorms. From how he spoke of it, it seems like dorm switching isn't a super rare thing, but it still seems uncommon, so I'd like to hear more about it.

But, yeah, overall, Rook is an interesting character, and I would love to know more about him. He has such potential and I usually enjoy his type in other games/anime, so I'm sad I don't like him more. Hopefully we'll get more about him at some point in the future.

(Side note: it is very late when I'm writing this rn, so if any of this sounds weird or grammatically incorrect, I'm sorry lol.)

[mihai-florescu]

Romanian parents and telling their kids attending uni in the west, who were panicking about what to do and how to help from here, that they should just have fun instead

[actualbird]

Omg I just started playing tears of themesis and its a lot of fun! I like that you actually have to find the clues, and actually solve the crime I think that's interesting. Any tips for a newbie lol

I'm so excited especially for the fact that I'm going to understand all the Luke posts on my dash because I love him already XD

wAAHH, hello and welcome to tot!! i hope you have a fun time playing :D (and yes, ur taste is Exquisite, luke is SO GOOD,,,I LOVE HIM SM,,,,,)

and i guess off the top of my head, i do have some tips!! feel free to take whichever u need and discard the ones that dont spark joy!

gameplay tips

do the daily and weekly tasks!: these give rewards each day/week that will help you in card leveling, overall player leveling, and collecting s-chips. sometimes events happen which add new tasks to do for certain rewards so like, basically whenever you see an Exclamation Point Icon anywhere, check it out! theres gonna be stuff to do and rewards to get from it

level up your cards!: if im remembering my own experience starting out, i recall that the debate power increase through the main story was a little bit steep in the beginning jHVKSJHDF. i used to get on by just fine with the EXP from debates itself leveling cards, but that quickly didnt give my deck enough juice. level em up with oracles so u can smoothly go thru the main story :D

take ur time exploring not just the story but also just the sheer amount of other stuff going on in the game: i was overwhelmed when i started, and i started on this game's Release. there was Less Stuff. idk how it must be for ppl coming in now, when theres More Stuff omg. but it's chill, take ur time, theres a bunch of neat stuff to discover

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story tips

(idk how intuitive/already obvious these might already be, but when i started out i had no idea how these types of games worked so it took me a while to realize there were MORE STORIES JHSDJFH so i'll mention these tips too, aka tips i wish i knew in august of 2021, HAHA)

read card stories/content: every card you have that is not an R card (so the SSR, SR, and MR), has either a 6 part story in them to read or 2 audio messages for you to listen to and they are Wonderful. dont sweat it tho if u dont have a card and u wanna know its content, by this point, nearly everything is recorded on youtube so u can easily watch what u dont have!

play the boys' personal stories!: aside from the main story (which are the cases and investigations) each nxx boy has personal stories u can find by going to Ur Phone In The Game -> Click On Guy Of Choice -> Lower Right Corner.

if ur interested in nxx team plots outside of the main story, check out past events and their plots on yt!: the event plots are a Treasure Trove of interesting case stories And full ensemble cast interactions. i love this game the best tbh when i see the whole team interacting with each other, so i adore event plots. sadly, nearly all of the events that are done cannot be accessed anymore to newcomers in the game itself, but they can still be watched on yt. buuut thats just nearly all of the events which leads me to my next tip that rlly isnt a tip but simply just my personal recommendation as an intense enjoyer of this game---

download and play through the Mysteries of the Lost Gold event: the Lost Gold event originally ran through september of 2021, but it's been made available permanently as downloadable content in the game no matter when you start playing!! i highly recommend this event. it's by far still my favorite event in this whole game (everything from interesting plot/case to fun gameplay to delicious characterization, I REALLY LOVE LOST GOLD OK!! THIS IS A LOST GOLD STAN ZONE!!)

anyhoo, this event can be accessed by going to X-NOTE Story -> lower and rightmost button Event -> upper and rightmost button Past -> download Mysteries of the Lost Gold

really, i cannot recommend lost gold enough ajhfvjkahfa this is the One Thing i hope all players can experience it's just...I REALLY ADORE IT OKAY!!!

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i hope some of these tips can help!! and i hope you enjoy playing this game :D

if ever uve got more questions, pls dont hesitate to shoot another ask hehe. it takes me a while to respond sometimes but i am Always down to be a tot-enabler thru sharing any info i can OwO

(also: jahsvfkjHVKJH SCREAM, have u been enduring my kilometric length luke posts prior to this with no context?? IM SO SORRY AJHVFKJAHSFASF HES JUST....I LOVE THAT GUY...)