#i don't know what it'll mean for me.

[sciderman]

I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain

Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it

i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)

really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!

undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.

i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.

people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.

peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.

it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."

so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.

people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.

autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.

[egophiliac]

Silver is finally here...he just took the title for the most beautiful card in TWST's history...

me five years ago: wow I really hope we get to see dragon Malleus someday! that'll be so nice and wonderful. I bet he's a big silly! :)

twst: :)

GOD. it occurred to me literally three hours before the anniversary stream that they might've been saving the reveal for then to just explode us all at once. this timing was EXTREMELY deliberate. thank you Twst. I can't even focus on all the Blazing Jewel stuff because Silver wielding the physical manifestation of his Complicated Dad Issues is busy eating my entire brain. and -- oh what's that? he duos with Lilia? I'M RUINED THANK YOU ᕕ( ᐕ )ᕗ

this is your warning that I'm going to be the most annoying person on the planet come Monday morning, thank you everybody and goodniiiiiiight

[lostandbackagain]

i like when darquesse asks china as she's dying what valkyrie was to her--daughter, sister, or toy--as if china's smart enough to know the answer

[nostalgebraist]

Due to recent experiences, I am feeling an urge to make an anti-drug-style PSA except it's warning impressionable machine-learning-curious teens to never, ever try a thing called "Huggingface transformers Trainer"

Not. Even. Once.

[thelaurenshippen]

ah yes, the sweet sting of rejection from a billion dollar corporation who believes that "action stories don't appeal to romance audiences", welcome back my old familiar friend

[000marie198]

...

Permission to smack Sonic over the head?

[bumpscosity]

the stanley parable merch is so funny im really gonna drop 20 bucks on a cassette tape which i dont even have a player for that tells you how to set up a copy machine that doesn't exist

[dormiloncito]

i'm at that point where i'm like you know what? let's just go to bed and hope for the best tomorrow

[cerbreus]

setting up 3 dates with 3 different men in the same week might not be my wisest idea

[djappleblush]

There's not enough Joel Miller fanfics on the internet and it's so fvcking annoying I need more protective angsty angry nervous shy tender gentle dominant capable daddy Joel Miller in my life 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[hatterofthelabyrinth]

Well thanks for answering my question hehe- but... We're in December and there are 2 days left until Christmas

. . .

Excuse me a moment.

[the--other]

[ Me right now at 1AM: 🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳 (¿? ]

[ Wow I did use all of the tags, huh?? ]

[freakwiththeknifecollection]

The sick feeling you get in your stomach as an undiagnosed/closeted autistic hearing friends/loved ones make fun of or talk about "what's wrong with" the openly autistic people you know

[pothame]

thamepo color analysis loading....

i want to preface this by saying i'm not super well versed in how colors are used in bl so i might get something wrong/miss something and if i do please feel free to jump in and add on! (under the cut bc it's very long lmao) also i AM over analyzing and i'm sure not all of this is intentional but it's fun to think about nonetheless!

starting with episode 1 part 4 because that's what made me start this thought train. in po's flashback we see him giving earn the two sandwiches, but we also see a photo of the two, presumably from earlier in their relationship. po is wearing yellow and earn is wearing blue. earn's workspace is also covered in blue with a blue chair, a blue lamp, and the bookshelf painted blue. from the colors they're wearing in this scene alone we can tell a lot from the status/dynamic of their relationship at the time. earn is wearing a black and white shirt, indifferent to po and their relationship, but po has fully adopted earn's blue. he feeds his partner and cleans the kitchen in blue showing he puts more thought and care into their relationship than earn. po is also wearing blue in the flashback to the earnchop event where earn, again wearing greyscale, overlooks po in his thanks to. when earn suddenly leaves po is wearing brown/neutral colors, perhaps he was feeling less into the relationship, muddy feelings. it's hard to tell whether earn is wearing a black and white shirt or a shirt with blue on it but regardless the scene is bathed in yellow light - as is all of the flashback in the apartment - which makes the blue, earn's empty space, really stand out.

when we meet po in episode one, he's wearing a greenish brown shirt as he mentions how he gave up his career to help boost his ex, but he's over it now and can get back to work! (lying) he's obviously not over it yet. he goes to pick up one sandwich but gets given (and charged for) two, probably because the two had been together so long he became a regular at this sandwich truck. the whole area is lit in yellow, and his ex on the tv is still wearing black. in front of the logo he designed. and the sandwich guy goes on and on about how great this guy is, which proves earn never went to the sandwich shop because wouldn't the sandwich guy recognize him? wouldn't he be like hey isn't that your boyfriend that's so great! of course not. of course it was po alone.

po gets back to the apartment and there's so many decorations that are color coded. blue pillows and blanket on the yellow couch, blue curtains, a blue tablecloth, a yellow coffee table cover (it looks like there's some blue too but i think it's just the lighting bc it also makes the sandwich wrappers look blue), a yellow book, and a post-it/piece of stationary that is mostly blue with a small yellow corner next to their matching black and white mugs. you can also see two framed photos of them both wearing blue. it's warm and yellow inside the apartment, but cold and blue through the glass doors. po picks up a photo, he's in yellow and earn is in blue. you can see below a photo from probably the same day. he then picks up a photo in a blue frame of earn in either blue and pink or black and white, again it's hard to tell it may even be the shirt he broke up with po in, and po in all blue. this was probably taken in the honeymoon phase, especially if earn is wearing pink.

the next day we see him in bright blue putting blue folders in a box, probably packing up earn's stuff, and he picks up his phone in its blue case. it shows all over that he's not over earn. i don't know thai so i'm not sure about the calendar.

the first close up at the suit shop is of a blue measuring tape and a yellow measuring tape resting together on a suit situated on a mannequin, as well as a green tape under. obviously yellow + blue = green. the next close up is of fabric samples, mostly blue with one red and a few warm creams (aka yellow). po walks in to the job he took to support his ex wearing the blue that took over his life and still remains. the suit shop owner, uncle joei, is wearing a blue shirt with a blue tie that has yellow flowers on it. the shop is covered in blue fabric on top of warm wood with yellow lamps and yellow walls. you could say it's symbolic of earn taking over his life and causing him to give up his career for the time being. po even has a blue sticker at the center of his laptop.

with this much blue i honestly had a hard time deciphering what his color was during the trailer and my initial watch but baifern saves the day! at the interview she sets up for him po wears white, a blank slate, a new start. during the interview we see a flashback to po working at the shop and at the fanmeet, both wearing pink (guess who's wearing blue. that's right THAME). this was probably during a high point in his and earn's relationship or at a point where he felt very strongly for him. we see him editing the fanmeet footage in blue at the very blue very neat desk, this was probably before earnchop got started. back to the interview and we see warm po in this cold blue room. his clothes almost look yellow and i thought they were until i saw the clip outside the building again. in the flashback to studying with baifern, we see po in white again. my guy is starting fresh and leaving earn behind and we love to see it! his notes. still in blue. but! i'm choosing to ignore it<3

as po gets his id picture taken we can see more clearly that his outfit is white and i just have to have a little blorbo appreciation bc he's so cute and happy to have a new job back in a field that he loves

we meet new besties ming, wearing yellow, and tae, wearing blue (and a yellow handkerchief!). we also meet thame yay! he's wearing blue (denim) over a black hoodie and arguing with the ceo over his schedule. with the added context from episode 2 of how she persuaded him into a solo career as an attempt to save mars but then didn't allow him any creative freedom, the tension makes sense. we have the infamous sasaeng accusation and thame is very guarded and aware of what's going on around him, especially when it comes to things that could affect his group (hello leader love).

po goes to the sandwich stand in his all white fit ready for change and frowny face :( two sandwiches. the green lawn behind him is very prominent and there's a dark blue sky just above his head perhaps emphasizing that he is reminded of earn. however baifern saves the day again with a phone call and po says thame is cute even thought That was their first interaction (what is wrong with him [lovingly]).

the next outfit change we see for po is at the concert announcement where he's wearing a brown tshirt under a cream cardigan, hello muddy feelings. tae is wearing his yellow handkerchief again, over a brown tshirt this time, and ming is wearing blue (denim)! i don't think their colors really say anything, at least not now, but it's fun to see the color palette extend to side characters. thame enters the green room in black and white before taking the stage in all black. the group performance is primarily lit in blue light, and thame's solo performance is very golden.

during the interview and argument thame has changed back into his black and white outfit. these outfits are consistent throughout the remainder of episode one but let's mention the flashbacks. i already went over po's flashbacks but i forgot to mention the amount of blue in the apartment while they're (po is) working on earnchop's logo.

both people are wearing blue, and blue in general sticks out more than the yellow, like it's taking over. like earn was taking over po's professional life. we see po in all white at the shop working on the logo, waking up in blue after working on it all night, but then we get our first non-old-photo glimpse of po in yellow as he goes to the store to take care of something earn left for him in a (yellow) envelope with a (yellow) sticky note on it.

then thame hits po with his perspective and we see one of his memories. leaving his members while wearing black and white (i think for thame black and white/greyscale is him trying to distance himself emotionally from the group and feeling like he's doing what he has to do to protect it).

at po's very yellow desk, in contrast to the one at his apartment, we see him starting to pack up for the night, surrounded by the dark blue night sky visible through the large windows. after he calls baifern with a question about perspective, he tries to find thame to explain himself. we see thame on the roof, alone, shrouded in the blue of the sky. po runs past the yellow walls of the inside of the building before heading up the rooftop where he and thame have their first moment in the beginning of getting closer. while you can see the blue of the sky and the cityscape, you also see the green hedges. where blue and yellow meet. po says a line he swears isn't flirting and that's where episode one ends!

this ended up being WAYYY longer than i intended and i guess also part recap of the episode?😭 so i'm gonna cut it here and make a separate post for episode two. i'm not gonna reread this because it's 12:30 at night so it's probably kinda cringe at points but it is what it is, maybe i'll polish it tomorrow but probably not lmao

[girlivealwaysbean]

pata hai i was looking through your chats on whatsapp to find your vdn ka address and i found a text ss from him that i sent you and it was something like unfortunately i'm not there but i do love you and i read that and had to sprint across the living room after reading that i can't believe it still affects me wtffffff when will it be overrrrrr i blocked him in august it should be over by now right

oh no😭 it's only been 3 months babe aur time lagega he was your childhood friend na and ahem

[emieclat]

while rereading scarlet i started picturing sophia lillis as thorne for some reason. so here are some doodles of that vision

(this is the scene where cinder plugs iko into the rampion)