#i do not remember what energy feels like
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#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#gojo satoru#megumi fushiguro#jjk art#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#pulled another allnighter fr Angst's sake cries i havent slept.......but i couldnt help myself i was out all DAY i hadnt drawn all DAY#do u know what that does to a mf i felt all antsy and Wrong#so i cracked an energy drink i think i may have a problem honestly but hey at least u get ur daily dose of megumi angst#remember how i said i considered including gojo in the yuuji/tsumiki/megu squared train piece#well this is me making up fr Not including him there#i ws right his and megumi's relationship deserves its own homage smile :)#anyway @ anon who wanted a gojo/megumi hug.....ik it's not exactly a hug but you can forgive me im sure <3#dare i say it's better than hugs jeremy.....#honestly fr all my gripes w gojo i Did get kind of emo abt this?? but i feel like. the majority of my emotions r on megumi's behalf#also might have been the mukashi mukashi no kyou no boku on repeat that'll also do it#seriously debated putting translated lyrics as the caption but it feels like a copout doing 2 lyric-captions in a row#also i do have some shame. miku lyrics r a bit.#anyway art notes uhhhhh finally got gojo's hair to not look Yuuji#who knew the trick was to make it longer smh maybe sleep deprivation n 10 hours of staring at a screen Does make simple problems hard#oh file name 'proud of you' btw
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Did you think I was done? Ahahahaha no, I have more.
Because chapter 70 of MOMU gave me the very dynamic between them that I missed so much, I just blacked out and started drawing uncontrollably lmao
Also. ALSO. I noticed a while ago that Prowl has the habit of..like…constantly frowning. So. I did a bit of research and made this graph.
In 70 chapters, Prowl frowns rougly 104 times. And the intensity of this gesture is very clearly correlated with the development of his relationship with Jazz, as you can see ahahahahah It might be wrong tho don’t take me seriously I’m not good with graphs
#maccadam#transformers#prowl#jazz#jazzprowl#fic fanart#momu fanart#I just#mmmmm#For the whole fic Prowl had to think twice about everything Jazz says#every information could end up being wrong#sometimes even without Jazz realising it#so when Prowl says#he’s trusting Jazz. it’s.#also it totally wasn’t me googling ‘believing and trusting nuance difference in english’#the moment I realised the difference I think my brain started rollercoaster loops#he can’t believe him but he found enough faith to trust him#while. YES. For the whole story Jazz couldn’t fucking be believed#list e n#Jazz did a lot of things for Prowl#fucktons of big and small gestures to show that yes he likes loves and appreciates Prowl#I’m so happy Prowl is returning this energy#like#remember that scene a while back when Jazz kissed Prowl? Cool cool okay. Did Prowl kiss him? nope. It was one sided gestures#*gesture. That kiss didn’t make me feel like it’s truly something precious because Jazz started it but Prowl didn’t do quite the same#but this👆. This feels so much more important for me. Because Prowl#who is for the whole story was mister I calculate every chance of possible betrayal. Prowl whos entire personality is to trust nobody#Prowl goes. Fuck that I trust you. You feel me?#it wouldn’t be the same if he said I love you. Because love is very much something you don’t have a lot of control over.#but to trust someone? It’s a choice Prowl had to consciously make. You see what I mean? I love it. oh fuck I ran out of tags..
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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please don’t be sad little sprout, you are loved 🌱 🖤
🌱
#🌱Thank you<33🌱#I guess my latest vent art post made some of you guys worried. I'm sorry ;;n;; )#but I'm alright. well.. kind of? Like I haven't done anything to myself kind of alright?#maybe I should explain bit about my situation but at the same time I don't feel comfortable to open up too much#but simply said it's about doing art as a job and mental health#Things haven't been going well but I am getting help for my mental health#This is all what I will say for now about my situation#I apologize again that I made you guys worried#but I do warn that I might post more vent art if I get enough energy to draw#this is just one way how I deal with my emotions#but if you don't like vent art I suggest to block the words vent and vent art#I remember tumblr has this option somewhere??#and uhh.. I don't really know how to end this post but thank you everyone who has been sending support<33#I might not know how to reply to them but I have read them all and I'm very thankful for all the support what you guys have given me🌱#Thank you🌱#ask#anon#me talking
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It seems to be pretty well established that most fanfic authors don’t mind when readers leave comments on old fics and in fact welcome it. But what about authors replying to old comments?
Do readers care in general whether an author replies? Is it expected and seen as rude if they don’t? Is it nice when they do but not expected? Is there a time limit to the welcomeness of replies? Like is it nice if they respond within a few weeks but if it’s been months or years it feels awkward because you don’t remember the fic anymore? I’m curious!
#basically I have let my ao3 inbox accumulate like 1600 comments#and I am wondering what to do about it lol#historically I was very good about responding to comment bc it’s important to me that my readers feel appreciated#cause genuinely I’m so grateful that they took the time to read and especially to comment! most don’t so it means a lot when they do!#but then I went through a very long phase where I was too lazy/overwhelmed/tired to reply to comments#so I just stopped doing it except for occasionally when I had energy or when a comment was particularly detailed/heartfelt#I always felt bad about it and wanted to eventually catch up again#but now I’ve let it build so much that it’s overwhelming and it’s been so long that it’s awkward lol#and every reply would need to begin with an apology and explanation#but anyway. I was thinking I’d at least like to respond to comment on particular fics#or that are within a certain threshold of time#or that are more thoughtful#but idk#just curious what the vibe is#personally I don’t expect authors to respond to me but it always feels nice when they do#especially if it’s a comment I put a lot of thought/energy into#and I think I’d be pleased to hear back even if it had been years#I might feel a little awkward if I don’t remember the fic lol#but it also could be nice to jog my memory and go ah yes that was a nice time!#haha#anyway#mine#polls
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I can't find art of my ship anywhere so I GUESS that means I have to make it myself, here are some doodles.
#ugh i can't believe i have to make my own shipping fanart#tfw you're complaining to your sister that you can't find any content of them but then you remember you have the power#man i do not know how to draw kissing or hugging or any of that romantic stuff#mostly i just know how to put paragraphs of dialogue in between two talking heads#but this seems to be something of a rarepair even though they are obsessed with each other so i suppose i gotta try#karlach#lae'zel#shipping#bg3#baldurs gate 3#karlzel#i think that's the ship name but i have found so little of them that i'm genuinely not sure#laelach#(just in case)#but come on they're perfect! they're sunshine/raincloud! dog energy/cat energy! tall/small! hot and cold! canonically into each other!#character who represses sadness and character who doesn't understand happiness! pretty girls who can both bench press each other!#considering what their banter looks like i don't get how this isn't a more popular pairing. who else does karlach wistfully sigh over?#my sister tells me that lae'zel is not well-liked by the wider fandom and that that may be why (so sorry if other people have bad taste)#or maybe people don't often put the barbarian and the fighter together in the same party at the same time#anyway now that you're 100% convinced feel free to draw them making out so that i don't have to k thx <3
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i fear the general public may not deserve her...but you get to see girl cider as a treat because i like her & i can't stop drawing her.
#OK. BIG LONG RAMBLE IN THE TAGS TIME.#“cider there's no canon implication of this in the slightest!!” i know. i know.#but i am literally just having FUN & i drew her once & it just#made me feel so much better... like i've been totally Going Through It but#drawing girl cider helped. so i did it more & i will probably do more in the future#but you know what i realized about headcanons that is so beautiful???#regular cis male cidertalk doesn't go anywhere when i draw him as a girl! it changes nothing about that.#just because i draw girl cider doesn't mean boy cider is GONE & DEAD FOREVER & i can NEVER DRAW HIM AGAIN#he's still right there :^) & i think that's important for me to remember when i do crazy out-of-left-field headcanons like this#it changes nothing & i can always play with contradictory ideas & i don't have to stick to anything!! & it's so fun!!!#if you have a problem with girl cider or she makes you uncomfortable i will send evil energy in your direction. watch out.#she's so cute isn't she? :^) that colored one with dandy is what really got me hocked on girl cider#ok normal tags now bye bye#chipspeech#cidertalk'84#dandy 704#cidandy#cider draws#bert gotrax#dee klatt#(briefly)#otto mozer#oh i also couldn't stop laughing at the “woman in stem” one
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The accomplishment of one of the kids in shul: Reading the haftarah completely in hebrew with little hesitation and in a pretty timely manner
My accomplishment (whole adult): Being able to follow along without getting lost (first time I have been able to do this)
Honestly, though, I'm not complaining. My method of acquiring knowledge was to do full immersion in my community, and I've been seeing how much I've been able to learn. In terms of Doing Judaism, I'm younger than these kids at shul 💀💪
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#shul shenanigans#if you are in need of feeling like a kid again try full immersion in a different culture / subculture#i feel like a kid all the time now ever since immersing myself in my community#but few of us read the hebrew - frankly they only read in hebrew as a challenge to themselves#that's the trouble with being diasporic huh? but it does feel nice when you actually DO understand what's happening in hebrew and whatnot#i put 110% of my mental energy in following the haftarah this week in hebrew#i really do recommend full immersion with only *some* prep though!#honestly it's made me feel even more a part of my community because they have indirectly taught me so much!#like this week i actually remembered to cover my eyes to say the shema the first go around because i saw them do it#and i was like SHIT UH OH but they won't be able to judge me for not covering if they covered their eyes in the first place so 💪#a very 'what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀' situation lmaoooo
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i think i wouldn’t hate disco elysium’s collage mode nearly as much if it weren’t for 1) the way that it was marketed in such a tasteless, soulless manner, let alone the fact that it was a last ditch distraction from a dead on its feet studio piloted by dumbass thieving execs and released on the day of the court declaration, and 2) those dumbass fucking stickers
like if it had been included with the base game from the start and had been titled something a bit more tasteful and in-line with how i would have liked the feature to be marketed as— something like “exploration mode”, something that perhaps could only be unlocked after completing the game for the first time, AND didn’t have those stupid as hell visually and tonally incongruent with the artstyle stickers, i would have applauded it as a nice little bonus for being able to study and appreciate the 3d models and environments for reference.
#it is just so bleak man.#i have no words left to say for the latest development at zaum studios so instead i will just remember how fucked up this was lol#those stickers are the same energy as that dumbass fucking christmas card they put on steam.#cutesy fanart is awesome and all but don’t muddy the tone of the actual source with it. why is that necessary.#for gods sake what happened to boundaries#again i probably would take a different tone to even the stickers if#it had been done under the original creators (which i don’t think it would have‚ which is my point‚ but say hypothetically it happened)#but with the circumstances the way they are it is impossible to not view it all as tainted with a veneer of absolute tastelessness#and a disrespect to the source material and a sorry attempt to appeal to the shallowest parts of ‘fandom’#like you can add cartoony emoji faces and a sticker with harry and kim as cats. or their hands with the caption ‘best friends!!!’ (wtf lol)#and a frame with a bunch of pride flags being waved around (hard to articulate why i feel doubly annoyed of this one.#your corporate pride parade aesthetic is showing again. also it feels… lazy)#but you can never‚ ever erase the fact that you are parading around a stolen IP that you are entirely out of touch with#and one that you clearly have *no idea what to do with*#(something that we’ve all known for months with these hints but today has finally been basically confirmed as the sequel seems to be#officially cancelled with the last of the original writers’ crew being laid off)#how could you have known what to do with Elysium? how could you ever have?#hope you have fun with your stickers. rot#disco elysium#me talking
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hi! your blog is one of my favourites and i absolutely adore reading your thoughts. my grandfather recently passed away and it feels like i lost myself with him. how do i continue living after this? there is this constant weight on my chest and it feels like an emptiness has made a home inside of me. how do i go on when it feels like the world crashed on my shoulders?
hello, love! this is so very sweet and kind of you, and i hope you're treating yourself gently and kindly right now - there aren't words for a loss like this. that heaviness is difficult, and hard, and painful. it's okay if things don't feel okay, right now, or even soon - i think that's something that a lot of the people i know that have gone through similar grief feel: like they should be able to get back to a relative 'normal' in a [insert far too short period of time].
but it's okay if it hurts. that's where i'd like to start. you're allowed to feel that emptiness, that world-crashed feeling that goes beyond words, beyond time. don't feel like you have to rush this to feel some sort of better. things get easier with time, i promise you this, but sometimes painful feelings are important to feel, too. cry, scream, feel your emotions. they're a part of you. grieve.
it's perhaps a little silly, but when i think about death i always think about a couple of space songs: mainly drops of jupiter by train and saturn by sleeping at last. there are perhaps others that speak to the emotions better, but these two have always hit something a little deeper for me, and are popular for a wide-reaching reason.
and while personally i don't know much about grief like this, i do know a lot about love; and i think they're a lot of the same thing.
the people we love are a part of us, and this is why it takes from us so deeply when we lose them, because it does feel like we've lost a part of ourselves in the wake of it. but it's because they were so central to our experiences of living - our lives, that the separation introduces a hollowness - a place where they used to be. a home that now goes unlived in.
an emptiness, like you said.
but just because they're not here physically, doesn't mean he's not still there, in your heart, in your life, your memory. you can hold him close in smaller ways, as well: steal a sweater, or cologne/scent for something a little more physical and long lasting for remembering. hold onto the memories you cherish, the things that made you laugh, the ease of slow mornings and gentle nights. write them all down, slide a few photographs in there, go through it and add more when you miss him. keep them all close, keep them in your heart.
you're not alone, in this. he's still there, with you, it's just - in the little things.
he's with you in the way you see and go about your daily life, in doing what he liked to do, in the ways he interacted with the world that you shared with him. the memories you recall fondly when the night is late or the moment is right and something calls it into you like a melody, an old bell, laughter you'd recognize anywhere.
but i think, perhaps most importantly above all others - talk about him. with your family, your friends, his friends, strangers; stories are how we keep the people we love alive. the connections they've made, the legacies and experiences they've left behind, and so, so many stories.
how lucky, we are - to love so much it takes a piece of us when they go. grief is the other side of the coin, but it does not mean our love goes away. it lives in you. it lives in everyone who knew him, in the smallest pieces of our lives.
the people we love never really leave us, like this: they're in how we cook and the way we fold our newspapers, our laundry, in the radio stations we tune in to and the way we decorate our walls, our photo albums. they're in the way we store our mail, organize our closets, the scribbled notes in the indexes of our books. the meals we love and the drinks we mix, the way we spend time with one another. they've been passed down for generations, for longer than history - and we are all the luckier for it.
think about what you shared with him, and do it intentionally. bring him into your life, like this, again. whether it's crosswords or poetry or sports or anything else. if one doesn't help, try another. something might click.
i hope things feel a little easier for you, as they tend to do only with time. i hope you find joy in your grief, even if it is small and hard to grasp at first. know that your hurt stems from so much love that there isn't a place to put it properly, and that it is something so meaningful and hurting poets and storytellers have been struggling to put it into words and sounds that feel like the fit right for eons, and that it is also just simply yours. sometimes things don't have to make sense. sometimes they just are - unable to be put into words or neat little sentiments, as unfair and tragic as they come.
but i promise it will not feel like this forever. your love is real. and perhaps, on where to begin on from here - i think it's less on finding where to begin and just beginning. and you've already started. you've taken the most important and crucial step: the first one. wherever you go, after that, from here? you'll figure it out. you always have, and you always do. it'll come, as things always do. love leads us, as does light - and you're never alone in your hurt. in your grief, your missing something dear to you. i think if you talk about it with others, you'll find they have ways of helping you cope as well - and they have so much love of their own to spare, too.
as an aside, here is the song (northern star by dom fera) i was listening to when i wrote this, for no other reason more than it makes me think of connections, and love, and how we hold onto the people we love and how they change us, wonderfully and intrinsically. it's a little more joyous than the others i've mentioned, and plays like a story, and it made me think of what is at the core of this, love and stories and i am here with you, and maybe it'll bring you some joy, if you'd like it. wishing you all my love and ease 💛
#q&a.#birdsong.#wishing u gentle ease; the death of a loved one is near inexplicable to put into words and i hope you take care of yourself gently <3#i hope this will make u laugh: when i was a tiny child in middle school there were times i would go outside in my tiny suburban cul de sac-#in the rain and sing along to my lil ipod nano and i only remember doing this to drops of jupiter. can you imagine going out to get the mai#after a long day of work and you just hear this kid singing train in the streets. in the RAIN.... it makes me laugh like i really.#i really thought i was so cool and deep and emotional ghjkd but i find it v funny that i only remember it w/ that one train track.#and saturn just. it's my fav s.a.l. song for a reason. that slow violin opening? the piano coming in gentle and easy?#it feels like light. like hope. like something new - a dawn after the long dark. that beautiful things can begin again even where#it hurts. and there is nothing more human than a sentiment like that.#how rare and beautiful it is to truly exist. what it is to be alive and get to be here and live with other people. with those we love.#i think your grandfather was so lucky to be able to know you. to have you in his life for the time you had together.#i'm no spiritual person; but i like to believe when you're thinking about him? he's thinking about you too.#the second law of thermodynamics (physics nerd mode) is that no energy has ever been created/destroyed since the beginning of the universe.#so it has to go somewhere - it's that carl sagan quote of 'we're all made of stardust'. because we are. we used to be stars; planets; etc.#i think it's why i think of these space songs - because they're a part of everything; once more; when they go. us and everything else.
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A lot of early concept stuff was expression/pose brainstorming - there’s the classic six Webkinz emotions (which, I learned have been largely pared down to just four after a point! Since they got rid of Dr. Quack’s role, there’s no more “sick” expression and most ‘Kinz’ tired and sad expressions are the same! >:0 What’s the point of having an easily editable puppet with the spaghetti code intact that you have to put an image there AnyWay and not make a slightly different expression!! H’f) as well as the main Sakura poses - so if I’m already making up expressions, why no go a little further! :D
One of the expressions I definitely needed up top was Mischievous - working with a cat, that’s the only logical conclusion really. I think it’s funny that she swerves the compliment only to pay it right back as well lol
The ticklish expression is one I’m still going back and forth on! I’m half tempted to have it be somewhere between happy and angry - maybe a mood gradient, starting out just positive and slowly moving into “Hey stop! >:0″ if it’s too many times in a row? It’s a thought haha
Similarly so, messing with her ears - bothering your pets is a very important element of socialization (lol)
As seen above, I’d reallyyy like to figure a way to have a dual-visual mood system - both the ‘Kinz body language/expression/emotion and a more exact stat bar. I’m still chewing on this idea a bit, no pun intended lol. That and click-and-drag with an actual image you can drag around your screen, hm and hm! Much to think about. Her face here turned out cute and funny haha, helped me push the expression more comedic
Much better :) Webkinz already has some well-known food dialogue, my favourite is probably “Mmm to the mmmax!” haha
Each low-mood would have their own emotion tied to it, but what about somewhere in the middle? I like the idea of the ‘Kinz getting bored if they’re left alone for too long! And little paw taps, showing off her embroidered paw pad haha ♪
#Doodles#Webkinz#Diamond#Ghostkinz#Ukadevlog#Diamond makes for an excellent concept art model#But y'already knew that haha she's featured a few times now! Plush or digital she's so cute#Of course these were made before her vectors! Had to start traditionally first and foremost!#All the bluesky stage so let's! see! what makes it to coding it lol#Some of these I even know how to do! :D The rest uhh we'll see :)#For now it's just the fun of Ideas >:3c Strong creative ideas cannot be fettered by realism! Lol#It'll be fun to see what makes it all the way to final! Heck I don't even know how much of what Actually Currently Finished will stay haha#I considered having the extra doodles under a cut but ehhh it's a cheat week it's fiiine it's not a big deal#How are we feeling on these mostly-unedited doodles haha - they're not too bad I think :)#The little intro in the first one haha - I went with my current in-game name even tho I use ''Willian'' for all my Ghosts this one included#It's a WillPlays but also not?? It's fine don't worry about it lol#Since pets are so centrally featured I gotta make sure they're good ahh#Smol actually came up with a great idea for face-clicks that aren't punches :3c So I'm gonna try that out sometime hehehe#It doesn't feel right to punch a 'Kinz! :'0 Bothering them is fine tho lol#So far I've thought up some ways to intentionally drop Happiness and Energy but I think Hunger would just have to be a waiting game#Maybe an activity of some kind? Not sure hmm#Anyway don't intentionally try to make your 'Kinz sick just to see the cute/sad blinking animations! That's mean!#(Do it I made the blinking animation soooo hard so every time they blink it's like she's struggling to keep them open ahhh)#I had the idea to have a run-away system if they're mistreated but hmmm dunno yet not sure#It really is fun to think of a more in-depth pet system ♪ I really like the many many features Webkinz Classic has!#The wide selection of pets and items and the room and clothes customization and games and like - there's a lot on offer!!#But it does really feel like the Interactions With Your Online/Plush Pet have fallen wayyy to the wayside :(#There's only extremely sparse locations you can even talk /to/ your pet anymore :( Not just as them like an avatar#I remember chatting with Sugar every time I logged on - I have to join a specific timed event just to wish Embroidery good luck anymore#Getting to chat is a big big reason I'm excited for this <3 It's /fun/ to chat with your plush! It makes them more real <3
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Maybe I could just [square bracket trick] these revisions and leave them for future me...
Future me is gonna be so mad hehe
#wipvii#I feel like I can't write the next few scenes without doing the revisions for the scenes I've already edited#but going back and changing things after a pass goes against my most important drafting rule#also it's been a hot second since I've written those scenes - do I even remember what is important?#am I just going to be overwhelmed by all the information I've forgotten and by the sheer amount of work#that fitting these revisions in is going to require?#especially because I know I will be making cuts to keep my word count in range - which is going to mean rewriting and reshuffling stuff#and knowing what to cut in the first place#it just seems like too many steps at once and I don't have the energy/brainpower for that#maybe I'll just [] the stuff I need to add in the correct places to get it started#then in draft 4 when I am reshuffling and line editing my scenes anyway it will be easier#than trying to do it all right now when it's been a while since I've read the scenes before it#man that's a lot of tags
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procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally
#on my friends living room floor they love together but one of them has been london for weeks or maybe months#to be with her love. im on a foam mattress from one of their beds next to a glass bottle of water opened by one of them#in a mug given to me by another. the weather felt like my childhood today and it also felt like 2 years ago.#(put space in the heavens Einstein's idea and hes your friend too so nothing to fear) around the table they drank and laughed and i thought#i hope you keep growing so full with the love you receive . i hope your appetite becomes insatiable from how used to it you are#and i know youre all leaving soon but i hope one day you miss this and that youll be happy you miss it#its worth missing i think#i thought he didnt care but he said after exams hes going walk around this area over and over#(this is near where he lived and where we visited almost daily for a year)#(hed come across the bridge on a lake)#we went where she used to live and at the entrance a fox sat calmly. it just yawned and stared.#it felt important somehow. i think maybe their impressions of me will never be close to how i feel inside but i think#i love them enough for that not to matter. i dont think theyll ever know this. i dont think if they did it would change much.#and seeing them smile makes my heart glow anyway. today i tried their malaysian tea the ginger burned my throat#they warmed my heart. hes going to canada soon and hes going to the US soon and shes going everywhere soon ill never understand#how were supposed to live with memories and with seperation and with the past but we do it anyway so i think it doesnt matter much#i wanted to write a poem for the lab rats with the fibre optic wires lit with blue forcing them to turn around and around#something about how im sorry that the two photon arrays burned the inside of your brain. im sorry about the sharp points of multielectrode#arrayes. im sorry about everything we do to you. she asked to see me tomorrow. im trying to have self control but i miss her so awfully#last night my friend talked to me and i updated on everything that happened with love and the lack of it and she just started laughing#and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets#and she felt like the people were her. and her eyes would go over the people and the bag of bagels and the construction men they probably#have a kid at home maybe shes a daughter. this kid is crying for her mother and the building you just walked past caused#blisters and pain and people died in it and very likely people were born in it. we talked for hours and i felt like#i was holding her hand just like that time she held mine watching a horror film. i love her so much#my friend is a genius and i remember her picking up the charms of my phone and staring at the leaf hanging from them. shes side stepping to#music drinking dangerous cider and cocktails from a movie and chit chatting with billionaires and undergrads#i love her dearly. his head covered in electrodes. she tells me about a syrian guy shes in love with and she says#what you feel and what i feel is like cocaine. ive tried a lot of fucking cocaine.#she says ive reminded her of what living actually feels like and to never put energy into someone who doesnt see me this way.
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Reminds me of “The World Was Wide Enough”, a song from the musical, Hamilton!
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#sonic movie 3#sonicmovie3hype#movie shadow#movie sonic#I’d imagine Movie Sonic being Alexander Hamilton and Movie Shadow as Aaron Burr 😭#🎶The World Was Wide Enough Sayonara… Shadow The Hedgehog🎶#Movie Shadow: 🎶 I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory Is this where it gets me on my feet several feet ahead of me? 🎶#🎶 I see it coming do I run or fire my gun or let it be?🎶 🎶There is no beat no melody 🎶#🎶 Sonic a young hedgehog whom I consider an uneasy ally and had our first rivalry Maybe the last face I ever see 🎶#🎶 If I throw away my shot is this how you'll remember me? 🎶 🎶 What if this sacrifice is my legacy? Legacy what is a legacy? 🎶#🎶 It's planting seeds in a garden you never get to see 🎶 🎶 I wrote some notes at the beginning of a song someone will sing for me 🎶🎶#🎶Earth you great unfinished symphony it was too much of a Mad Mad Mad Mad World for me 🎶#🎶 You let me make a difference a place where even weird technicolour space alien orphan children 🎶#🎶 Can leave their fingerprints and rise up I'm running out of time I'm running and my time's up 🎶#🎶 Wise up eyes up I catch a glimpse of the other side 🎶 🎶My creator my father Gerald Robotnik is on the other side 🎶#🎶 He's with his granddaughter Maria who’s on the other side Teach me how to say goodbye 🎶 🎶 Rise up rise up rise up MARIA! 🎶#🎶 My best friend my sister I’d love you to take your time 🎶 “I'll give them a chance to be happy…”#Company: 🎶 he uses the very last of his chaos energy- Movie Shadow: “CHAOS CONTROL!” Movie Sonic: “WAIT!”#Movie Sonic: “He was unable to maintain his super transformation form any longer” “I tried to stop him but he punched me away”#“I get a drink” = “I get a chilli dog 💀”#🎶Aaaah Aaaah Aaaah 🎶#“I hear cheering in the streets” 🎶Aaaah Aaaah Aaaah 🎶#🎶 They say Gerald and Shadow Were both at her side when she died 🎶#🎶 Death doesn't discriminate Between the sinners and the saints it takes and it takes and it takes 🎶#🎶History obliterates in every picture it paints It paints me and all my mistakes 🎶#Movie Sonic: 🎶 Before Shadow The Hedgehog feel down to Earth he aimed at the sky He may have been the first one to die 🎶#🎶 But I'm the one who paid for it I survived but I paid for it 🎶 🎶Now I’m the “hero” in your history I was too young and blind to see 🎶#🎶I should've known I should've known the world was wide enough for both The Ultimate Lifeform and me 🎶#🎶The World Was Wide Enough For both The Ultimate Lifeform and me… 😭🎶
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I got thinking too much about Marwa from What We Do in the Shadows again and how she was canonically making observations of Jupiter and Saturn in the 1200s. Then I thought about how Elena took Damon to go watch a meteor shower, and I decided that Marwa and Elena should get away from all the vampire drama B.S. in their lives and go nerd out about astronomy together, and this moodboard sort of happened. I also thought about how Elena becomes a doctor and went ah, they are both women in STEM! So I ran with that as a theme too.
But yeah, Marwa needs a friend who will actually support her interests and engage with her intellectually (no shade to Nadja and the Guide, I'm glad they had a fun weekend watching Mamma Mia together which was literally the only time we got to actually see Marwa happy onscreen, but they have never demonstrated much interest in science that I can recall and I want Marwa to have an astronomy buddy), and I think Elena would be fascinated by her and her perspectives on astronomy from centuries ago, and they could learn about modern astronomical advances together. If I find the time and energy I might even write fic about it, but for now, here is a moodboard so that we can all bask in the vibes of my beautiful crossover vision together.
Image sources: x x x / x (the first frame of x gif + a screenshot from x) x / x + x x x
#Elena Gilbert#Marwa wwdits#Marwa/Elena#Marlena#Marwalena#I'm not necessarily viewing this as a romantic ship but I'm also not not viewing it as one. take it either way as it pleases you#rowing the rarepair rowboat#(thank you freddieslater for letting me use that tag that's such a good tag)#the Vampire Diaries#What We Do in the Shadows#Marwa the Relentless#at first I didn't want to call her that because Nandor is such garbage to her. not even garbage. he hollows her out and destroys her soul#but I like the idea that she is also relentless in her own way. if only insomuch as she survived him. which really she didn't#the more I think about what happened to Marwa the more I feel like she endured the worst fate imaginable. I mean what Nandor did to her was#really so much more evil than any of the compulsion we see in Vampire Diaries because I mean he completely erased everything that made her#who she was. He chipped away at her personality and her sense of self bit by bit until he literally deleted anything recognizable as Marwa#from existence. I need to scream about it.#and the only scene with her smiling is the one I took that screenshot from. The only. Scene.#anyways I'm so glad she's fine now & having fun showing Elena cool telescopes and telling her about all of Jupiter's moons &how to see them#I love astronomy so if somebody on TV mentions liking astronomy I become bonded for life with them. lol#TVD rarepair rowboat#WWDITS#not to be anti-wwdits; I do love Nandermo. but they did Marwa so dirty#Justice for Marwa!#astronomy moodboard#I made this weeks ago but I got so busy with the play but now the play is over and I went 'hey remember that moodboard you should post it'#so here it be :)#it's not the best moodboard I've ever made but I made it in a passionate fervor of feminist energy and I like it
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I wanted to draw misakis funny shirt so so so badly but i couldnt draw her hat for the life of me :,,,,(
#watching mygo rn grgrggrrgrggrhr its so good#i love them all…… ive forgotten their names rn so i cant tallk abt them but i love them#art tag#bandori#whats the bandori tag. got damn#bang dream#hello happy world#girls band party#misaki okusawa#kokoro tsurumaki#dunno if i should use their ship tag its not like. ship art? theyre kinda just hanging out#man i wish bandoris beatmaps itched my brain as nicely as other rhythm games do#somethin about it…. maybe its just meaner to me but it doesnt feel as like satisfying to play? which sucks#and you can only use i think up to 3 energy things!!!!! getting the event stories are killing me let me use more!!!!!!!!#cutomised the hell out of the lane and beat thingies which helped a bit. maybe theyre too tiny thats what i dont like idk#remember seeinf bandori YEARS ago like ? what is this? anyway#and now look at me. im in the trenches rn. having the time of m ylife#i love sll the bandori characters o smuch ALL of them. ok im done. good bye
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