#i do not know if this is normal or healthy

[rebuilding-hope]

Okay yeah. I think a lot of people have no idea how any of this works. You can't boycott a necessity.

It would be like saying "let's boycott big agriculture by just not eating."

To successfully boycott something you absolutely must have a backup system. You cannot just pull a backup medical system out of your ass.

Yes, you can implement a rudimentary first aid and build a natural apothecary but none of that will ever ever even touch the amount of technology and modern medicine needed to maintain, let alone treat or cure many illnesses.

Seizing the means of production includes the medical industry too. I want the ability to schedule an MRI when I want, even if for being able to say "I had a scary procedure done now, when I'm not already in a scary medical situation."

With my medicaid, before Covid ruined my local medical scene, I was able to get an MRI. I didn't need one as an emergency, but I had gone to a neurologist with my mental issues to rule out any physical causes. The test came back as normal, and I don't know how true that is, but I have some sort of baseline to look back on if it's ever needed. And now I know that MRIs aren't scary, they're actually pretty cool. They make lots of cool noises.

And I think it's the lack of education about how our healthcare system works, how the doctors learn and work, how the equipment works, why it works.

That shows fear, keeping people from seeking healthcare when they do have access to it.

This is not normal or healthy. We all know this. Boycotting the healthcare industry is what they want. Don't give it to them. Keep putting pressure on them. Show them your health matters.

Your health matters.

Deny, defend, depose.

CNN suggested that Luigi Mangione stage a boycott instead of what he did. a boycott of the health care industry. exercising my right to protest by fucking dying.

edit: it was ABC. tomato, tomato.

[olailamajnoon]

Dick: Bruce, you look down in the dumps.

Bruce: How do you know that's not just my face?

Dick: Because your face usually says 'existential despair', not 'terminal illness'.

Bruce: Well. It's nothing. Anyway...

Dick, shutting the laptop: Bruce I'm not moving from here until you tell me.

Bruce: *sighs* Fine. Selina doesn't want any children. We've been talking about our future together, after marriage.

Dick: Oh.

Dick: Wait.

Dick: You want more children?

Bruce: Well...isn't it a normal, healthy instinct?

Dick: Bruce, I think you've left normal and healthy a couple of light years behind you. You have six children, dammit!

Bruce:...

Bruce: Do you think I have a problem?

Dick: Well....

Bruce: *puppy dog eyes*

Dick: Absolutely yes.

[apiptosis]

Part 2 while I try to figure out tumbler.

The second one to meet Danny was one Cassandra Cain.

Cass ran into the thermos guy about five weeks after the incident with Tim. Unknowing this would Kickstart quite the changes in her life.

It was chaos for a while after Tim's 6 day long coma. For the first time in a very long time her brother was completely awake and refreshed. His completion returned to the healthy shade it's supposed to be and the bags under his eyes disappeared completely for a while.

The cause of Tim's coma was a caffeine overdose well that and an untreated concussion. According to Dr Leslie the last lingering traces of the larzarus pits managed to bring him back from the edge and now everyone in her family was religiously monitoring his caffeine intake. His time at the bat computer. How long he was allowed to be at WE. Etc.

Her brother was a saint for how long he lasted but eventually he got so fed up with everyone that he started a fight with Jason and Damian at the same time and after a brutal fight she, Alfred and Bruce had to break up Tim stormed off to buy the first apartment he could find that was reasonable enough.

So there she was in the early morning hours breaking into the old aparrment, room no. 404 was supposedly haunted, to give him the dented thermos she stole back from Bruce and Alfred as an apology. She even went to the Coffee shop at the corner of her studio that Tim liked and refilled it. No masks needed.

Cass was barely into the unfamiliar room when a frighteningly familiar voice appeared behind her accompanied by the singing of an unsheathed sword. "Truly Daughter, that you have allowed-"

An abnoxiously loud slurp interrupted her mother and in retaliation she stabbed the source. Said source had barely managed to turn one of the desk lamps on before he released a grunt of pain as Shiva stabbed him in the gut and he dropped his coffee mug to shatter on the floor.

A normal sized man would have recieved a mortal wound but the guy was atleast seven feet tall and struck his now vacant meaty paw out to grab Shiva by the forearm hard enough that she had to let the blade go.

The moment she let go he hefted her in the air by her arm uncaring of her kicks and merely chastised her with the barest hints of a Midwestern accent. "That was incredibly rude and since you stabbed me with it this saber is now mine." With a clean motion he tossed her out through the open window.

The whole scenario threw her off kilter and the few seconds it took her to realign herself he had already defenestrated Shiva.

With a grunt he pulled out the blade and set the bloodied thing on his sink with his ruined shirt before pulling out two chairs. 'Why would he do that? Everyone knows you don't just pull out something sticking into you, that was a sure way to bleed out.'

"I'd say it was a pleasure to meet you miss but that was rather unpleasant, you have my sympathies if that was truly your mother. So why dont we start over while I make us a cup of coffee."

"Names Danny and you are welcome to the Astral Apartments room 304." The man, Danny, said as he busied himself with the coffee machine.

"304?" For the first time Cass' rattled mind found it's voice that night. Danny immediately ought onto her confusion and radiating concern asked. "Yep 304. What room were you looking for?"

"404. Brother. My name is... Cass."

"The new guy? Moved in 5 days ago? Yeah, he left about an hour ago. If the pattern repeats he should be back in about four to five hours. It's nice to formally meet you Cass."

That was not good.

"Here," Danny said as he placed the a carton of milk and some sugar cubes down on the table next to the - yeah no that was not a cup of coffee - while it may look like an odd cup that was definitely a rather large steaming mug of coffee.

As Danny moved to take a seat Cass could find no trace of hostility from him. Her skills with spoken and written language might not be the best, it has gotten better though, her skills with the language of the body and emotion however was. Danny gave her no hostility or even dislike. Just pure concern, a lot of warmth, and comfort and a little bit of curiosity and some interest. Definitely a sense of protectiveness.

Her own worries and concern faded to curiosity and interest as she saw the wound much smaller than it was before.

"You can stay here till your brother gets back. He's usually here by the time I have to leave for Gotham U."

Slowly Cass sat down and prepared her coffee the way she liked it. Tradings one basic facts like her being a ballerina and prodding about here and there with the occasional prompt she soon found him rambling.

About his classes, how studying at Gotham U was going and how different they were from his schools in Illinois. He was studying to become an aerospace engineer. Random tidbits of space. It was kind of cute in a way how this behemoth of a man with a smile a little too toothy and bright or ears a bit too sharp rambled about his interests, eyes shining lie stars.

Eventually she had to leave when Tim arrived no matrer her own reluctance. That he was shirtless and easy on the eyes was a bonus and not one of the reasons she stayed.

As she left she concidered her options. This man with stars in his eyes would no doubt attract attention from the rogues. If she patrolled here as Orphan no one would really care all to much. It's just her way of lightening Tim's burden and keeping an eye out for Shiva.

She can come visit as Cass as well, perhaps get him to eat something. His fridge was very empty when she saw him returning the milk.

Grabbing one of the sticky notes she always kept by her she wrote down her number for him alongside a mental note to look at the academy a little but.

A few seconds after Danny closed the door Danny again. "So that's where by thermos was! I could have sworn I looked there."

[gurugirl]

Quiet Xmas Morning blurb | bfd!harry

⋆꙳•❅‧ ☃️‧❆ ₊⋆

Summary: Your heart is full and you have so much to be thankful for on Christmas.

A/n: I know it's not very long but there's a lot of new things in this one. If you haven't already, I'd suggest reading the previous part before you read this.

Word Count: 1,507

Warning: soft fluffy cuteness - no warnings!

best friend's dad!harry masterlist

⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅̩̩͙‧͙ ‧͙̩̩͙❆ ͙͛ ˚₊⋆

The house was warm and quiet as you sat in the glider chair with your newborn in your arms. She was falling asleep slowly. She'd suckle and then her eyes would lull shut before she'd startle herself awake and start to pull at your nipple like a ravenous animal again. You smiled and smoothed your fingers over the soft hair on her head. It'd only been a week and a half since she was born but you already felt like she was your everything. It surprised you how deeply you already loved her.

Elara came a little early but you were ready for her. Harry said she wanted to make it in time for Christmas. She had to be monitored for a few extra days but she was healthy and she was perfect.

You saw the glow from the Christmas tree lights filtering into her room from downstairs and then heard a little rustling. Harry must have also been up. He was sleeping when you got up to feed the baby but he often would wake up when you'd get up. It was still something to get used to. You were more exhausted than you'd ever been in your life but maybe that explained why you were so deliriously in love with her.

Her suckling grew weak again, little eyes closed, and then… she was fast asleep. After waiting a few minutes, just in case, you carefully and gently got up from the chair and tiptoed to her crib to lower her down all without waking her.

She was perfect. Yes. That was true. But she was easy to wake and she'd cry for hours if she was woken up before she was ready.

Harry stood behind you and placed a hand on your shoulder as he looked down at your little creation with you. He knew better than to even whisper so you both just smiled at one another before quietly padding out of her room and closing the door behind you.

Your body was still sore. You knew it would take time to get back to feeling like yourself. Even walking downstairs felt like something was going to knock loose and fall out of your body. Harry held your hand.

"Merry Christmas, Mama," he kissed your lips softly when you got to the first floor.

The living room was dark except for the soft golden lights wrapped around the faux Christmas tree. You preferred a real one normally but it was too much work that year. Plus the smell bothered you when you and Harry had gone to check out the tree farm weeks earlier.

"Got your gift under the tree," he motioned.

You looked under the tree to see one small box with a bow. You hadn't wrapped any of Harry's and they were all tucked away, hidden in the closet in the basement.

"I didn't wrap yours. I'm sorry," you reached up to cup his face and he brought an arm around your back.

"You already gave me the best present I could ever ask for."

You grinned, "That I did. But you played a major role in that gift. So technically I could consider that a gift from you as well."

He grinned and pressed his lips to yours, "I'd say my role was very minor. All I had to do was get off a few times. You did all the hard work. All the stuff that counts."

A laugh puffed from your lips, "Okay. That I agree with."

You smelled coffee suddenly and realized Harry was making a pot.

"Decaf." He raised his brows at you. You were staying away from caffeine since you were breastfeeding. The doctor said you could have a little bit every day but Elara was fussy enough as it was. The last thing you wanted was a grouchy, angry baby hocked up on traces of caffeine.

"My mouth is watering," you spoke with a smile.

"Why don't you sit down and I'll get your coffee. Then we can open up your Christmas present."

Harry frothed a little milk for you while he took his coffee black. Even he was drinking decaf when he could have just had regular. He walked back into the living quietly, two steaming mugs in hand before handing you yours and sitting his down on the coffee table.

You took a sip as he reached under the tree to pull out the small red box. It had a small golden ribbon tied around it.

"What is it?" You held your palm out as he placed the box down into your hand.

"Well, you have to open it up first."

Taking another quick sip of your coffee before you leaned forward to place the ceramic mug down you looked at Harry with a big grin. The glittering lights from the tree were twinkling off his eyes as he looked down at the box and then up at your face.

You pulled at the ribbon and then paused when he sat up, about to push himself off the cushion, "What are you doing?"

He swallowed and you noticed that he suddenly seemed nervous, anxious. He shook his head and shrugged, "Nothing. Was just getting comfortable is all."

You squinted at him as he looked down at your hand. Then it was your turn for the nerves to take over. You couldn't be sure what was in the box but something told you that it was going to change everything. You knew Harry very well and his sudden excitement had your heart pounding in your chest. And given the size of the box…

"Harry…" you blinked your eyes and placed your hand over the lid as you swallowed.

"Just open it, baby. See what it is." He was still sitting at the edge of the cushion, watching you as you pulled the lid off. Inside was another, smaller box—a jewelry box.

You inhaled and looked up at him. He wore a soft smile on his face as he tensed his arms, like he was about to spring from the couch.

The moment you placed your fingers on the velvet-hinged top to lift it, he pushed himself onto his knees and scooted in between your thighs as the beautiful little shining diamond glinted from inside the box. A ring. But not just any ring.

He waited for a beat, his eyes on yours as your jaw dropped and you covered your mouth before looking at him in surprise.

Harry took the ring out of the box and held it between his thumb and pointer finger, "I love you. I want forever with you, Y/n. I know we're not in a rush but I couldn't wait another moment to put a ring on your finger. Tell the whole world you're mine."

You gasped out a quiet sob and just as he was about to continue you leaned forward and wrapped your arms around his neck to kiss him hard. You never imagined that you'd cry when he finally proposed but of course, your hormones were all out of whack and you'd been finding yourself crying for the smallest things lately.

He laughed when you pecked kisses over his cheek, "Yes, Harry…"

"Baby, I didn't even finish th—"

You smushed your lips over his again, swallowing his words as he pulled you into his arms until you were in his lap on the floor between the couch and the coffee table.

"I love you, Harry…" You smeared your lips down to his jaw and he chuckled quietly.

"Gonna put it on?"

Pulling away from him, you looked down at his hand and spread your fingers out for him to slip the ring onto your finger. It was dainty and perfect—one small diamond at the top, set in white gold. You held your hand up, and you admired the way it looked on your hand for a moment.

Harry wrapped his big palm around yours and pulled your hand up to his mouth, "That's a yes? You'll marry me?"

You sputtered a laugh and nodded, "Of course I will."

He kissed your knuckles and grinned at you before you pulled your hand away and wrapped your arms around his neck to squeeze him tight. Harry tucked his face into your hair and put his arms around your back.

It was going to be the best Christmas day ever. Fae would be coming by for a couple of hours and then your parents later in the evening. Telling everyone you were finally engaged would be exciting but the best part was that you and Harry had the most precious gift lying upstairs sleeping already.

You placed your hand over his chest and ran your nose against his, "I'm so happy, Harry. I love you so much."

He shifted his legs and ran a big palm up your back, "That's all I want, for you to be happy, Y/n."

Harry got exactly what he wanted because you'd never been as happy as you were in that moment.

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[starfieldcanvas]

ehh. i mean, i see your point, but i don't have to think extrajudicial assassination is an especially effective vehicle for social change to be glad (and even gleeful) when someone is prevented from continuing to openly profit off and promote massive, egregious, continuous, unrepentant social murder. there aren't narratively ordained Bad Guys; there ARE guys who do bad things over and over and over again, blatantly, publically, at massive scale, and beyond meaningful reach of the current legal apparatus. i would be a very poor modeler of human behavior indeed if i expected the average person to mourn the removal of people like brian thompson from the world.

that is, in fact, why you see so many centrists and conservatives freaking out about the public celebration: they are bad at modeling human behavior. or they're just lying, but imo a hefty percentage are genuinely taken aback! they've gotten to the point where "hating rich people who profit off the deaths of the poor," a completely normal and predictable human behavior, has them clutching their pearls over the breakdown of the social order because their ideology of "Worship Job Creators, Beloved Heroes of Capitalism" has entirely divorced them from reality.

the sliver of the left freaking out about it is presumably coming from a different place, one where we have strong principles on the one hand and 'normal and predictable human behaviors' on the other. as progressives we strive to be genuinely better people building a genuinely better world, but, as philosopher jamie smith puts it, "I'm a pacifist because I'm a violent sonofabitch." i don't want to build a system on my worst impulses, but also, fuck that guy sideways, I'm glad he's dead!!! you know??

i believe capital punishment is bad. i believe vigilante justice is bad. but i've concluded they're bad because of the meta impact they have on society's overall ability to function in a healthy way. that doesn't preclude me coming to other simultaneous conclusions like "it would be nice if this specific person were dead because that's currently the only thing that will remove them from power" or "it's good when local nazi agitators are scared of violent local reprisal" or "it's very satisfying when people who are cruel because they think they're untouchable are reminded that their actions have consequences." because my beliefs about the proper way to run society arise out of my desire for a world where people like brian thompson don't have the power to hurt anyone, not out of some kind of abstract dedication to healthy social systems.

There's currently a few videos going around tiktok trying to answer the question of why conservatives can't make good art and I think that the premise there isn't necessarily true. Lots of conservatives have made good art, and a lot of that art even has pretty blatant conservative messaging it in. But I think people who say this are getting at something in the sense that whenever a conservative idealogue makes art that is designed specifically to reinforce their conservatives views to a similarly oriented audience, those works are almost universally abysmal dogshit. Like the first Ghostbusters movie works better as conservative propaganda than like... Idk, God's Not Dead, because the people who made Ghostbusters didn't sit down to be like "hmmm how can we really own the libs with this one" like that instinct is what actually destroys the quality of a work

[penkura]

Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Summary: Straw Hat Christmas parties are always large events, but you wish Sanji would stop and join you all for more than a few minutes at a time.

Note: Just another with a small moment in it, I couldn't help myself but to do it with Sanji. :)

You’ve known from the start that when the Straw Hats party, they party and it’s always a big event, no matter what the reason for it. It’s a given that whatever you might be partying about, there’s going to be copious amounts of food and drink, all prepared by your crew’s amazing chef.

It seems like Sanji never gets to take a break, you’ve always hated that part about these parties, despite loving his food. You wish he’d take a break, join you all out on the deck for more than a few minutes at a time, only to hurry back to the kitchen for whatever he was cooking. You hated watching him start to relax only to be dragged back in there, even if the kitchen was almost a safe haven for Sanji, he deserved to take a proper break like the rest of you.

It’s not even that Luffy has asked for more food in the last hour, there’s plenty made, but Sanji knows your captain will be asking for more later, he’s trying to keep ahead and it’s leaving him without a moment to breathe anymore.

You hate watching him do this to himself, overworking even when he should be taking a break. When you see Sanji go back into the kitchen, after leaving for not even five minutes, you huff and lean against Nami, making her raise an eyebrow at you.

“What’s gotten to you?”

You nod your head towards the kitchen and she knows what you’re saying without a word, Nami sighs and shakes her head.

“Ever the one serve without a break…maybe he’d come relax for a while if you talked to him.

“Why would he listen to me? I think you’d be the better option, Nami.”

Nami rolls her eyes, pushing you off her lightly and towards the kitchen.

“No, definitely you. Go get him out here already!”

You’re confused but do as Nami says, heading for the kitchen with every intention of bringing Sanji back out on deck with you. You have a slight idea that Nami knows something you don’t, or she’s seen how Sanji seems to go with you no matter what you’re doing or where you’re going, though you don’t think there’s anything more there.

You slip into the kitchen easily, Sanji normal leaves the door unlocked when he’s working in there anyway, especially if you, Nami, or Robin need anything. When you get in there you smile to yourself seeing Sanji is relaxing a bit, he’s taken a break probably while something is in the oven, sitting the table with his head in his arms on the table, like he’s trying to fall asleep. You’ve caught Sanji sleeping like this before late in the evenings after dinner, always deciding to surprise him by wrapping your arms around his shoulders from behind and convincing him to go on to bed. Of course it’s how you decide to try and get him to join the rest of you, he’s not even surprised when you do it, Sanji’s so used to you coming to get him at anytime of day now.

“Sanji, come take a break with us! You’ve been doing too much for this party.”

“I will,” Sanji sighs and pats one of your hands, making you frown when he goes to get up again, “I just want—”

“No, now, Sanji,” you grab his hand to keep him from going back to the oven,  causing him to give you a confused look, “Please. You deserve to take some time off just like the rest of us…things can wait until later.”

Sanji knows that you’re right, he gets that, and he wants to keep working so all of you had enough to eat and drink. He’s aware that it’s not exactly a healthy work ethic, but it’s all he’s ever known. He’d rather have everything ready before he takes a break, even with you giving him the look that always makes him give into what you want.

“Its fine, you know…I don’t mind working if it means you all get to relax.”

“But everyone wants you out there already!”

“Everyone, huh?”

“Hmm,” pretending to think, you glance away briefly as Sanji laughs a bit with a nod. “Maybe Zoro doesn’t care, but…I want you to come join us already…”

There’s just a moment before Sanji sighs with a nod, you grinning as he turns around to turn the oven off, removing whatever was in it and taking off his apron. You give him a tight hug when he comes over to you, Sanji kisses the top of your head in return before pulling away and taking your hands.

“Well, let’s go back to everyone then, yeah?”

“Yeah, let’s do that!”

[anglercrit]

Ain't no way a show in 2024 is out here outright having a character say "cheating isn't even that bad"

Like the fuck kinda morals are even happening in this show anymore

Next thing you know we're gonna have full on victim blaming where like. Angel fully says "well i never said no outright so it's all my fault and i should be happy my abuser even wants me! it's normal to physically and sexually abuse the people you care about so passionately!"

Like Jesus Christ man she wants her shows to be taken seriously but imagine if like bojack or something tried to justify him cheating or almost sleeping with a minor because of his "feefees"

Genuinely I feel like Viv is letting her kinks get in the way of her plot. Like- do I care about people having cheating kinks? Not really- I know there are healthy ways to indulge it. But the way Viv writes everything makes it feel like she just wants to write something to get her hot and bothered and then put on a guise of a proper show over it. At this point she needs to just get an AO3 and start writing PWP stuff.

[uniquebluelioncub]

I Cracked Sebeks place in the Diasomnia family

Sebek to rest of the diafam is that one cousin that is more your sibling than cousin , like yes technically he has his own family and is their cousin but if you say that they would be like no , he is our brother ?? Take back that nonsense at once. ( if they were honest for once with their feelings) Sometimes all of them forget he has his own family . Silver has the same exact position on the Zigvolts . Because there is no may Mr. Zigvolt or Ms. Zigvolt just left baby Silver with his dad who thought his baby would just come back after he crawled away , like no we are co-parenting now . like Lilia is giving his best but his best isn't that great , still a good dad but he needs help. That Man and Mal are the reasons Silver grew up relatively healthy. They would have went that boy is ours too now ( no Lilia bashing but his cooking is deadly)

To Lilia he is one of his boys, he isn't the legal parent of Mal either, and yes he isn't Sebeks dad but that is his boy , he may have good parents but hey they can share. They already do .That is the boy he saw grow up and a constant in his home , he is his teacher , mentor and adult responsible for him . Thats not his son but one of his kids.

To Silver , he is a core part of his family , what you mean he isn't ? Thats his little bro from another father/mother , his best friend he has know him for all of his life , when he thinks family he thinks the dia4. The Zigvolts have pictures of Silver with the rest of the kids at their house change my mind . It isn't even a question for him Sebek is family thats it.

To Malleus he is one the little kids that he saw grow up , he may have not held him as a baby but as a toddler , he may be obsessed with him , but Silver is obsessed with mushroom risotto and he is with gargoyles thats just how Sebek is , thats his littlest guy . His little guy who cried bc he couldn't do magic. Yes he might be annoying sometimes but everyone in this family is sometimes thats normal . Mal is that one sibling with a huge age gap who basically raised his little siblings . If Lilia and Silver are his family so is Sebek . He will protect Sebek with his life , he chose those two as knights not because of their strength but because of their hearts, they will never be afraid of telling the truth to him ( or so he thinks) And with them close he can protect them .

AND Sebek is still like ah yes my cousin/sibling and his emotionally foolish family thank 7 I am the normal one in this family and not a part of it he is in denial as he is SEBEK ( need I explain more ?)

[reorientation]

Just started on estrogen as an intersex woman because it turns out I never had any my entire goddamn life. I always identified as a lesbian, I love women, I'm in a long-term relationship with a woman, and that's not changed...

...But, oh my god.

Men smell so *bad*, but it's in such a *good* way. I don't understand it. This is completely opposite how I used to feel and I don't *get* it, and the worst thing is I'm a dominant?

And all I can think about is being pinned down and crushed. What is HAPPENING to me? Surely this cannot be normal, surely something has gone wrong?

I'm the one who's in control. I'm the one who takes control. I like women, I don't like men.

And god, for months now, I haven't been able to get off unless I'm thinking about some guy finding me, taking me, and me being *fixed*. Fucking me straight, making me a good girl for him, converting me. And it really is fixing, isn't it? I'm a bit broken and I need to be cured. I'm dripping as I write this. I've never dripped before.

Please either tell me this is unhealthy or help me feed it, because... wow. Please help make me worse, or make me better - I don't know which anymore.

It's obvious what's healthy and unhealthy here, isn't it? You went to a doctor and were told what you'd been missing your whole life - and then you went home, and took the drugs, and realized what you'd been missing your whole life.

There's something so pure about this! You knew who you were as a woman - and as a lesbian, and a domme - but you didn't know who you were meant to be. You got corrected - genuinely, medically! - and all of a sudden you discovered a deep, profound need to be a good girl for a man.

"I'm the one who's in control. I'm the one who takes control. I like women, I don't like men." -- but that was what was wrong with you, this whole time! This isn't inherent to having estrogen - nearly all women do, and they don't all feel like this - but as soon as it hit your bloodstream, it was all you wanted. What can you possibly conclude except that you were built for this?

You still love women, you still love your girlfriend - but for months now, either she hasn't made you come at all, or she's only made you come while you fantasized about a man fucking some sense into you. You only learned how to be dripping wet while imagining dripping a man's cum.

How could you ever look back? How could you try to return to the life you had before, now that you've seen how it was always wrong?

[spongeknife]

Timebomb: A look at supportive relationships with amnesia (a focus on DID)

I have been rewatching S2 Arcane, and of course Echo's scenes in E7 have left me with a special type of joy. So, coming from someone with DID, I'm looking at how DID effects relationships and what a supportive partner may look like. I would like to note, I do not think Echo has DID, nor do I wish to make that connection: But, Powder's perspective of Echo's changing behavior has a lot of similarities to my own real life experiences and I wanted to highlight that. Also the advice I give may not work for everyone. This is more a guide for partners who have no clue where to even begin, with examples, not a step-by-step instruction manual. I will do my best to go in order.

Alright, so I'd like to start at the beginning, where Echo is writing in his journal and seems to "become aware" of where he is. In Arcane, I understood this as our Echo taking over Powder's Echo. But, in a system sense, this can also be seen as "switching" (one part becoming aware of the body/taking control).

Now, I think in a lot of cases, these "switches" can lead to confusion and stress, as a part tries to piece together what is happening and who they are. It terms of relationships, Powder is unaware of this "switch" when she begins to talk with him. Much like a system, many switches can be very internal - leading a partner to not be aware of what is happening inside a person's head.

Powder, pretty obviously goes about conversation as she normally would, walking up to Echo with a smile and even making a joking quip. Echo, internally, is connecting Powder with Jinx, and I think the visual in the mirror depicts that really well. Much like a part who has switched in, Echo is relying on his old memories and is unaware of who this present "Powder" person is. I have experienced this as well, being unaware that a problem from the system's past is no longer a threat. Powder proceeds to process that Echo is clearly not okay (by the way he jumps back in defense) and tells him to relax. Even when Echo throws an object at her and grabs a screwdriver in defense, she does not attack back, instead just questioning why. Now, I do not think in a real world scenario any OBJECTS SHOULD BE THROWN, and I do believe Powder is a lot more patient than most people. (I know if my partner threw something at me, I would not just be confused and then move on).

But, in a less extreme example, Powder is staying true to who she is, and what her reactions are. I find in systems, when disorientation and stress happens, one of the best things a partner can do is be routine and patient. Or, even helping a part ground themselves (which we see later on). Powder is clearly upset and confused (I would even say hurt), but she doesn't become reactive. In the real world, I would not recommend just ignoring if a part has done something hurtful, but instead, disengaging or supporting until there is a better time to address it. In this case, when Echo does not respond to her asking what gives, she drops it (and I would recommend coming back to it when the person has a clearer head). What is not seen here that I would also recommend is coming up with clear boundaries and sticking to them BEFORE incidents happen. Having a sit down with your partner's system and letting them know what you are okay and not okay with, is a great way to show the system that there is stability.

System note: Now, I would also like to note there is a couple times, I as a system, liked to believe Echo has this reoccurring problem (or a similar one) because that's comforting. And, as a side note, one of those times is Benzo seeing Echo and saying, "one of those days, huh?" Benzo and Echo's relationship (familiarly) is also a great example of being a healthy support system, but that's a story for another time...

Now, continuing on, Powder is flexible. She does a good job (it seems at the moment, at least) with accepting this "different" Echo, and choosing to support him through verbal and physical affection. While in Arcane, Echo isn't very appreciative of her gestures, in the real world, being flexible is a good way to remove pressure from an already stressful situation (Imagine how this would've gone if she had snapped at him in that moment for being so distant), even if he doesn't believe it, Powder is showing she is still on his side through this (and, I believe this helps him open up later on).

Walking through the bar to sit with the group, Powder seems to be holding his hand as well. Again, using physical touch as a grounding tool to help guide Echo. She continues talking with him as she normally would, and when he seems dissociated from the conversation (going from partially aware to completely unaware), that's when she snaps to ground him again, out of concern.

She asks what's wrong, and notes that he's been out of it. In real life, many systems experience time loss - and, when switching or dissociating, may not even realize they are. Reaching out and describing how a part is behaving may help them realize something is off as well. Powder has been supportive, compassionate, and above all else, VERY patient. Echo opens up about how he feels ("waking up in the wrong universe"). All the small steps she's taken has helped him feel he can open up. (Again, imagine if she snapped or threw something back at him, in his eyes, equally viable options from her). Now, not all parts switching in may feel ready to open up, some parts may need a LOT more small steps, some may only need one. Her ability to come back and keep trying is a beautiful illustration of how much support people with systems or DPDR may need. AND, when he opens up, she reminds him of what he's been through (staying up all night). In real life, a part may be unaware of what the body's been through, and empathetically letting them know may help them adjust to the present. Along with this, Powder talking about sleep is, again, showing a partner is likely to be unaware of what is happening internally if the system does not communicate it. Given that, Powder still tries to reassure about what some current stressors may be (there being "plenty of time before the competition") and reminds him AGAIN, that they are a team ("we'll work out the kinks"). She goes to touch him and he flinches away, in reality, parts may be doing this because they are still not fully grounded. Again, if they have been living in the past (especially a trauma covered one), they're natural state is being on the defense. When a part dissociates they may be reliving their experiences silently, or even becoming unaware of their body - reverting to that naturally defensive state. Powder looks hurt at his rejection, which is completely valid. She still picks up the cup that gets knocked over, is still aware that now is likely not the time to talk about it, and doesn't degrade Echo in front of their friends.

Milo runs off, and Powder has a good reason to follow behind. I think it's a good reminder that, yes, it can be very tiring, and as a partner, it is not wrong to take breaks from situations. Sometimes, things are stressful, and taking a moment to do something else is NOT wrong. I know a lot of partners really want to stick through it with their partner's system, but please remember your own health is just as important. Go on that walk, hangout with friends, drink some water, write about it, whatever you need to do to regulate. Additionally, in this case, Powder is the direct stressor (it seems), and she's giving a break to Echo to process what is around him. Sometimes that's needed too, hopefully the system you're with tries their best to communicate when they need to take a step back (and they may need some help at times). Sometimes what a partner does CAN be an indirect trigger, but that does not mean that partner is to blame. System note: I'm going to skip over most of the parts where Powder and Echo aren't interacting. But, I would like to note as a system, I can relate to Echo not being present, instead being focused on something else. (When he redraws the anomaly over and over and OVER again), just a little tidbit that I can relate to. Along with Echo not wanting to be in the "present" moment. Powder, despite all the stressors, invites Echo into her routine (seeing Vi).

And, she does not show how confused or upset she may be feeling. Continuing to show him respect. Once they are in a private, safe (I assume it's safe to the original Echo and her) space, she tries to ask about why he's acting so distant. This is a good example of coming back to what happened later. She saw him talking with Heimerdinger and likely believes he is feeling better enough to talk with her. Now, in real life, a part may not be ready. That does not mean the partner should never check in about how they are feeling. Dating a system has a lot of trial and error, sometimes it's the right time, sometimes it's not. Now, if a system DOESN'T hold space for how you may be feeling (aka, EVERYTIME you try to check in it backfires), I would recommend a genuine conversation about it. Again, just because your loved one is struggling does not mean you as a partner deserve to feel like crap for trying to be supportive.

In this case, Echo wants to know about his present situation. Powder does a great job of summarizing for him and tries to help fill in the gaps she thinks he could be missing. In real life, again, a part may need help connecting to present day, letting them know what may be obvious can help them feel more grounded AND stable. Additionally, when Echo has doubts about Powder's character, she shows there's no reason to distrust her. She doesn't get offended by his questioning, instead just letting him know who she is, through the perspective of Echo. In real life, highlighting what a part has done with you can help them see that their system trusts. "You weren't gonna figure it out yourself", "You're the big idea guy." are both lighthearted ways to remind Echo who he is, and that he has trusted her in the past.

I'd also like to note, she continues with what she went there to do. She takes a lighter and heads over to Vi. She's not being dismissive, but she's also not cornering him, either. This emphasizes her reliability and trust, and shows Echo that she's not focusing in on him like a hawk. In real life, some parts who switch in may feel like they're just waiting to be punished, like they're just waiting to make a wrong move. By continuing routines, a part may feel the lack of attention means they don't have to be on defense. System note: "having an identity crisis again" is just adding to my previous notes LOL.

At Vi's altar, we see a great example of what to do in situations where a partner is getting hurt by a switch in (which can happen). Ekko is processing the fact Vi is dead AND Powder has been handling a lot of stressors that can come from switches (rejection, being treated like a bad guy, ect.). In this scene, Powder is clearly hurt, and, I believe she has every right to be hurt. Yeah, not every switch will be 100% great. That being said, I loved the way she handled it. She places a couple firm boundaries, like letting Ekko know what she doesn't want to talk about ("That's not funny Ekko" and "Just 'cause you're having a bad day, don't take it out on me."). She's letting him know how she's feeling, and without being mean, is letting him know she is reaching her limit.

She's upset, and to me, she has every right to be. Some systems/some parts I've met have a hard time recognizing that just because they are in pain means what they're doing can still have consequences. That is a seperate topic I could talk about for days, but in this case, I'm treating Ekko as a part who pushes boundaries. Ekko continues to ask questions about what happens. Yes, some parts may do this. The reasons are endless (maybe they feel this reality isn't real so who cares, it could be any reason), but at the end of the day, if you're interacting with a part that is pushing boundaries and you don't want to handle it, don't. I'm not saying walk away forever, but Powder does a great job if placing a final boundary, "You should leave." Again, she's being firm, she's letting Ekko know she doesn't appreciate what he's doing, but she's not going out of her way to attack him. When you're supporting a system with parts who push boundaries, it can be hard to not react back. But, imagine it much like arguing with a person without a system. I know very few arguments where attacking back has worked in favor of both parties, and that compounds when you're interacting with a system.

Now, in this case, Ekko leaves. But, what do you do when a part isn't respecting boundaries, if, hypothetically, Ekko didn't leave the room? I know this may not work for everyone, but I would stick to my own boundary. If I ask someone to leave the room, and they don't - choosing to continue a conversation in this case, I leave the room. Remember, again, your own stress and health is equally important, and it'll be hard to help anyone (including yourself) if you can't remove yourself from the high stress situation when you need to. If placing boundaries is hard, I would recommend practicing. I've at times, told my partners I would like to practice ending conversations and what not in low stress situations (letting them know so they don't feel rejected), so I can get used to being able to.

Following this, Powder is very clearly avoiding Ekko. When Ekko looks up she turns away. I think this is a good reminder that things parts do CAN have an effect on their surrounding support systems. I think it's good they show Powder is clearly upset by what Ekko has done. In real life, this can happen. Being a partner should not mean having to be 100% whatever emotion their partner's system needs. That's not very healthy or feasible. Again, it's okay to feel upset and hurt, especially if a part is doing something upsetting or hurtful. Powder doesn't go out of her away to attack Ekko or retaliate, and that's another good thing to keep in mind, even when it's hard.

The next scene we see with Powder and Ekko communicating is Ekko showing Powder the shrine he created of Vi. In a real life sense, a part may be trying to apologize OR may also be trying to show their partner that they are doing their best to be connecting to the present. Parts that are traumatized may have a hard time communicating complex emotions in a way that's understandable, so they may communicate through creative methods. Now, Powder does a good job of recognizing he's trying to apologize and open communication, so she does as well. And in that opening of communication, she learns more about Ekko and vice versa. In real life, this could mean a part opening up more, or just a part being more willing to be cooperative. Ekko, in this case, also stops recognizing Powder as a threat, and in real life, a part may begin to do the same thing. When Ekko talks about his version of Powder compared to the real version, it is very akin to a part trying to synthesize present day situations and past traumas/situations.

In turn, Powder opens up about her own feelings. In real life, opening up to a part may give new perspective on a situation, and can lead to a mutually supportive environment after a switch. In this case, Ekko is willing to hear Powder out and help her (giving advice), and Powder begins helping him with his own project. This goes back to those baby steps I mentioned at the beginning. If Powder hadn't continuously taken small steps to show she wants to be on a team with him, their conversation may not have gone like this. Additionally, now that a "team" foundation has been built, Powder and Ekko can build each other up. In this case, Powder bumps him with her shoulder, a form of physical affection he appreciates now that he's more grounded, compared to earlier that day where most physical touch was met with defense.

I think it's also good to recognize, Powder seems more willing to show support to Ekko in ways she didn't previously because they communicated.

Like the fact she chooses to sit across from him instead of next to him. This is a part of the flexibility I was talking about earlier. Because different parts may have different wants/needs/boundaries, being flexible can help both parties feel desired - instead of trying to continue things as if it were a previous part.

Another example of them now working as a team is Ekko supporting Powder at Vi's altar. Even though he has not experienced what she has (or doesn't remember it that way), he still recognizes it's importance to Powder and helps out. In real life, a part becoming aware of a partner's feelings and communication styles can also lead to moments like this, where a part who may not be aware of everything, tries their best to support you through your own struggles, even if it's not how your partner's system "typically" shows support.

Now, it seems in Arcane, Powder isn't fully aware of what Ekko is trying to build, but she still helps him to work through it. Now, in real life, a part who has switched in may have alternative goals compared to the rest of the system. In a case like this, where the goal isn't threatening or harmful, supporting that part can help build up that "team" based foundation. The part knows that even though you may not be their partner, you're still a safe person to go to in times of trouble, or just when they want a comfortable person around, even if there are no romantic feelings for them. This can be very important when high stress situations come about later, and can help parts open up about what's going on internally (because, remember, a lot of system communication/mental health is internal).

Additionally, because Ekko and Powder feel safer with each other, Powder feels okay asking questions. In real life, having a bridge of trust, even if it seems small, can lead to moments like this as well. Where a part feels open enough to answer questions, and not become defensive. Remember, at the beginning of this Ekko couldn't even be close to Powder without becoming defensive. These small steps have worked towards the goal of being able to communicate and trust each other, it's all built up.

Powder is clearly excited for what they've worked on together, because they're now a team (even if, again, it's not romantic like her Ekko). In real life, these connections can lead to those same feelings of excitement and commitment, even if it looks different from how it was with a different part.

We can also see that Ekko is open to how she likes to show affection (physical touch), and she's looking out for him ("Please go change before the party") because she understands and cares for him. Ekko also does change for the party, and in real life, this can be seen as a part caring right back. Following this is where they dance together, now she recognizes he dances differently ("Where'd you learn those moves?"), but still has a good time. Again, she's flexible and compassionate towards him.

Instead of choosing to be upset about how things are different, she accepts these differences and chooses to have a good time with Ekko. In real life, a part may do things differently - they may dance differently so to speak, but you can still enjoy what they have to offer (again, even if it's not inherently romantic).

Ekko thanks Powder. He was able to have a good time and experience something he thought couldn't be real. In real life, a part may be feeling the exact same way. They may feel their trauma memories, their past, clouds how the presents can be. By finding ways to support them and have good moments in the present, it can help them feel things do not have to be as bad as they've experienced. Along with this, Powder leans on his shoulder. She feels supported again as well, even if it's different. It took some work, but she's able to be vulnerable with him in the same way he's being vulnerable to her. And that's really important, even if the relationship between some system's parts aren't romantic, it's really important to feel like it's not completely one sided as a whole. Yeah, some parts may not be supportive like you're used to, but if you begin to feel resentment towards the system or feel like certain parts are ruining your relationship, I would recommend having a conversation about it. If you feel like you're not getting back what you're putting in, I would recommend having a conversation about it, because again, your feelings matter.

Moving on, they kissed. I don't necessarily want to focus on that. I want to focus on what happens right before. Powder goes in for a kiss, and Ekko rejects her ("Sorry, I..." and pulling back), and she looks hurt. She lets him know it's fine, but even while she's hurt, because they have that base "team" foundation, she waits patiently for him to explain. She doesn't just walk away, or lash out. She waits for him. And I think, a lot of systems, and certainly myself, just want someone to be willing to take it slow when we need. It's rough, and we recognize a lot of "typically" relationships don't have the amount of waiting that can be needed. But, truly, one of the most compassionate things I've experienced, is having someone gently pull the brakes and wait for me to be able to communicate.

Ekko communicates, he asks for her to "just pretend like it's the first time," but note, he looks hurt after asking. He seems to be waiting for rejection. In real life, a part may be like this. After the trauma they've went through, or the stress of switching in, they may just feel like they're waiting for the other shoe to fall. Ekko and Powder have worked towards being able to communicate towards one another, so he does open up, but that doesn't mean that feeling of anxiety goes away. This is part of why some parts may feel the need to take it slow, while others may be open and ready after only a couple steps.

Powder is flexible, patient, and kind to him. She is willing to pretend like it's the first time, and she doesn't act like it's some sort of chore. In real life, while a partner may be "pretending" it's the first time, please keep in mind that to the part that switched in it is the first time. It may be the first time for a lot of things (for feeling included, for being affectionally touched, for working with someone positively, for going out to a party, any of it). The good moments a partner chooses to have with a different part can help them feel more relaxed in the agitated state they've lived a lot of their life. Ekko grew up in a vastly different world, all of the kind things she is doing is completely foreign, and some parts switching in are the exact same way.

At the end, Powder sees him. In real life, in our time, I can't imagine being able to see other parts like this - where they have a physical body and what not. But, you may have a moment like this. A moment of recognition, of understanding. You might even have that moment without your partner's system knowing. You might find things you love (romantically or otherwise) that are different part to part. To keep the conclusion short, Powder does a wonderful job of showing patience, respect despite being confused, empathy, and compassion throughout this episode, and many moments shows kindness in unconventional ways. Please, remember to be kind to yourself, and of course, every system is different - so remember to communicate.

[hannahhook7744]

Oh No! My Intervention! It's Broken!

Summary: King Arthur had tried to ignore Merlin’s not so slowly increasing visits to the tavern. But after Merlin's three day disappearance and reappearance he just can't ignore it anymore.  Merlin’s drinking has gotten out of control and their friends are all concerned. He has to do something. Or: Arthur tries to be a good friend by staging an intervention for Merlin’s non-existent drinking problem.  Trigger Warnings: Implied alcohol abuse and dependency, swearing, threats, etc. Inspired by this post. Merry Christmas @aconfusedvoid ! Hope you like it!

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Gwaine was, undoubtedly, going to hell for this. 

Oh sure, he had definitely earned his place down there long before today with all his drinking, galavanting, fighting, swearing, and wooing of many. But after today? He was most definitely, seriously, unequivocally going to a special place in hell. 

Why?

Well because Arthur was staging an intervention for Merlin because of a drinking problem Gwaine knew the younger man didn't have and the knight was enjoying every single moment of it like the little shit stirrer he was. 

The king had gathered the round table, Gwen, and even George for the intervention—saying that he was concerned for Merlin and his health and safety, and that he hadn’t invited Giaus because he was afraid the man enabled the behavior. He looked more and more embarrassed the longer he spoke, and honestly it would have been a pretty solid argument had Merlin actually been the alcoholic Arthur thought he was. 

Lancelot, Leon, Mordred, and George looked like they wanted the floor to swallow them up—which made sense since the four of them obviously knew what Merlin was actually up to. With George being an assassin, Mored being a druid, and Leon and Lancelot being extremely observant, and all.

Gwaine couldn't help but wonder if they knew that each other knew. 

He was willing to bet 20 shillings that the answer to that was no. 

Elyan, Gwen, and Percival looked just as concerned about Merlin as Arthur did and yeah, Gwaine was definitely going to hell for how much the whole thing made him want to burst out laughing. 

He was made all the more sure of it when Merlin entered with a pitcher and some cups, and stopped dead when he saw the looks on all their faces (Gwaine was sure it was obvious he was holding back laughter based on the glare Arthur was sending him). “If I didn’t know better, I would say this looked like an intervention.” 

Nobody said anything.

Merlin shot Arthur a betrayed look. “You told me this was a council meeting!”

Ah. That’s how he got Merlin to willingly come here.

Gwaine couldn’t help but snicker. 

Percival elbowed him in the side. 

“Ow! What was that for?”

“It was for you not taking this more seriously. Thank you Percival.” Arthur responded, rolling his eyes before turning his attention back to the subject of why they were all here. “Now, Merlin, I’m sorry for bringing you here under false pretences but I—we—are concerned about you.”

“I can see that. You don’t normally have interventions for people you aren’t concerned about.” Merlin scowled as George took the tray and pitcher from him, and crossed his arms. Giving them a baffled look. “What I don’t understand is why—”

“You have a serious problem, Merlin.” Gwen interjected. “Drinking to this extent isn’t healthy.”

The look of complete done-ness on the servant’s face was almost enough to make Gwaine start cackling again. He almost did when Merlin and Lancelot met eyes—no doubt having a silent conversation on how to get out of this mess. The only thing holding him back was the pain in his side from when Percival elbowed him. 

But oh how he wanted to.

He probably shouldn’t have found this as hilarious as he did. But he couldn’t help it—the whole situation was just so ridiculous in context. 

Gwaine knew he should intervene. 

But he didn’t. 

He would when he was needed. But for now, he was content with just sitting back and watching to see just how his best friend planned to get out of this.

“I don’t have a drinking problem.” Merlin sighed. 

“Says everyone with a drinking problem ever.” Arthur deadpanned, ignoring Gwen’s hiss of “Arthur!”

“What Arthur is trying to say—”Elyan cut in. “—is that we aren’t here to judge you. We just want to help you get better because we’re your friends and we don’t want you disappearing like that again because next time we might not be able to find you.”

“I am going to kill Uncle Gaius for this and then tell mother.” Merlin muttered, only loud enough for Gwaine to hear it seemed before addressing Elyan at a more natural tone. “Yeah…about that…”

“You always take on so much.” Percival frowned. “You take everything so hard and  you keep everything negative bottled up inside when you really shouldn’t—”

Merlin looked at Mordred, who have him a sympathetic grimace and Lancelot, who gave a ‘don’t look at me, you get us out of this’ look. 

“You should really tell them, Merlin.” George hummed, refilling Arthur’s drink. “He’s been planning this for weeks and they’ve all been oh so worried. They’d likely  be less worried if they knew the truth.”

The other servant looked alarmed. “How did you—”

“What are you on about George?” 

“What do you mean the truth—”

“Oh for Godsakes.” Leon grumbled, standing up. “Merlin isn’t an alcoholic, he's a sorcerer and he’s been disappearing so often because he’s always trying to save Arthur and the rest of Camelot. Now can we PLEASE just end this and pretend it never happened. This is mortifying.”

The room went silent. Dead silent, one might say. 

Gwen, Arthur, Elyan, and Percival all looked like several different things were all dawning on them at once—missing puzzle pieces no doubt appearing and sliding into place explaining things they had been suspicious of like too easily defeated foes, broken branches, and foes speaking in riddles that seemed to make no sense, for instance. 

Lancelot looked embarrassed. 

Mordred was staring at Leon in shock.

George refilled their cups as if nothing had happened.

All while Merlin stared at Leon gobsmacked. 

And just like that the damn that had been holding back Gwaine from laughing broke, causing him to have a fit. His laughter so loud that it echoed throughout the castle and the kingdom.

“YOU KNEW?!” Merlin screeched—eyes moving frantically from Leon to George to Gwaine, shock written all over his face. 

“All the servants in the castle know, Merlin.” The other servant rolled his eyes—actually rolled his eyes, which was the most emotion Gwaine had ever seen from the man other than when the meeting had started, that is. “How many times has Giaus scolded you loudly about being careful with your magic with the door wide open?”

Merlin swore, burying his face in his hands. 

“I told you.”

“Not the time, Lancelot. Gwaine! Leon! How did you two know?”

“You weren’t exactly quiet when you told the dragon to fuck off, Merlin.” Leon deadpanned, looking exasperated as if he wasn’t just as much of a menace. “Also I recognized Mordred as the druid boy Arthur spared. That along with the bandits tripping over nothing and flying tree branches, not to mention the Lamia not affecting you, made it very clear that you were dabbling in sorcery.”

“Strength.” Gwaine pointed at Arthur before pointing at himself. “And Courage. That makes you magic. Also plates don’t fly by themselves. I would also like to apologize for my previous bad faith comments regarding magic, I was trying to hide the fact that my sister had magic too and may have overdone it a bit.”

Lancelot stared into space, looking as if he was regretting every decision he had ever made in life. 

Gwen and Elyan were muttering to one another. Comparing stories. “It all makes so much sense.”

“That’s why Mordred called you EMRYS?! I just thought he was confusing you with the real deal because of how attuned with nature you are!” Percival sputtered, having an existential crisis. 

Merlin was two seconds away from a panic attack.

And Arthur?

He looked relieved. “Oh thank god you aren’t reckless enough to risk your life just for the sake of getting sloshed. I was afraid we’d have to lock you in a room to help you detox or something.”

“Arthur!”

“WHAT?!”

“You were gone for three days! We thought you were dead! Can you blame me—”

“How many times have I told you I’ve never been in the tavern?!”

“It was a genuine concern!”

[soap-is-an-artist]

gonna ramble about charlie and auron because i just got out the premiere and. holy shit.

if I'm way off base on my analysis i am so sorry, im still processing, these are just my initial thoughts on stuff. and if you disagree id love to discuss it!

okay so first things first i screamed a LOT. I was so relieved when Charlie said he wasn't mad at Cas [i would've cried probably]. Auron made some truly wild comments. case in point: "I would probably slap the taste out of your mouth if it wouldn't mean getting you all hot and bothered just in time for Casper to drop me off at the office, pull into the parking garage, and fuck some goddamn sense into you." I YELLED OMFG auron. you can't just SAY shit like that. Then the Disney princess line. Charlie sounded so weak when he said "can we go back to that part about 'Casper fucking some sense into me'??" And Auron answering with "Not until I'm outside of the vehicle. You'll have to find someone else to watch." AURON. STOP PLEASE IM GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK FROM LAUGHING

alright moving on from that let's get to the serious shit. Charlie is justified to be angry about Auron interfering in his personal life; it ISN'T a healthy way to interact with people, whether you want to befriend them or not. Auron orchestrated this whole scheme because he doesn't know how to communicate his feelings, and you know what? I get it. He doesn't know what normal is, and it's not really his fault that he doesn't know. But he can at least try? Wikihow is free, brother /lh

Charlie wanted a fresh start. He wanted to disconnect from the dangerous world that Auron is a participant in, he wanted to earn his own way in the world, earn a bit of self damn respect like he deserves. Auron undermined all that, despite his good intentions. He lied, big time. And that's kinda shitty and not okay!

Was it about control? Keeping a hand on loose ends, like Charlie thinks? Auron just wanted to "protect him", right? Well, as someone who has had much of their life controlled by people who ALSO just wanted to "protect" me, that's a very weak excuse for taking away someone's agency. Now, our situations aren't exactly the same. Auron is not Charlie's parents [THANK GOD] and there actually some things Charlie isn't aware of that he needs to be protected from! But this was not the move. Like.. at all.

What's my solution? I dunno. But maybe don't force all these things to happen. Perhaps send an email rather than getting your guy to hunt down your former employee's childhood friend/crush and sneakily reunite them behind his back? Or at least try the email first, Auron. Charlie calling Auron out on playing pretend, "just writing one of your little stories"... ouch. But does he kinda deserve that? Yeah. I think so.

[Side note: Charlie talking about how if he'd sought out Cas on his own terms, it would've worked out because they fall in love every time? "Because that's where I'm supposed to be." I. fucking. fell over. I had to fucking BITE something omg. Yeah im biased in this argument sorry lol, i definitely have a favorite here]

HOWEVER: Auron admits that he was wrong! He is not an unrepentant man and he DIDN'T double down! That is a big point in his favor imo. He doesn't actually say "sorry" but he uses a lot more words to mean something... similar? I guess that's a fanfic writer's way. I get it, I also elaborate way too much. So, an actual clear cut "Charlie, I'm sorry I fucked with your life behind your back just because I wanted to be friends with you" would've been nice. But this will do for now.

Also Charlie you REALLY need to watch out for Finn that guy is a freakkkkk he will fuck you up big time. Not normal Finn. The magic one.

Okay I'm done typing whatever pops into my head with the barest pretense at organization lmao, I'll revisit this in time once my thoughts marinate a little more

[moonspirit]

Annie was stuck in the crystal during the time that puberty would hit her the most. How does coming back from the crystal AND losing titan powers affect her? I was wondering what are your thoughts about it. Does her body change afterwards or not? How does she feel about it? Whats her reaction to getting her first period/PMS? How are the girly talks with Pieck? Did Armin notice the change and/or sense Annie's worries related to the lack of it?

Hello anon!

I've spoken about this a few times in the past so in case you haven't seen those posts yet, they're here if you're interested :O~

the whole age discourse

the growth discourse

Annie being malnourished and a HC that she develops agoraphobia.

Tho to put it simply, my thoughts are that she suffers from weakness, tiredness and exhaustion post losing the titan powers and this lasts for quite a while. Something about the strain of carrying the power inside her all this time that makes itself known only once its gone. Imo she probably also suffers from insomnia and *some* binge eating tendencies.

Tho I've always thought that post-canon she's likely to maybe gain a bit of healthy weight and perhaps even grow an inch. The fact that we saw her stunted at the pre-timeskip height means we will never know if Annie's was always destined to be a short person through her genetics or if she's just that way because of the crystal with potential to grow more post-canon, or if the crystal irreversibly damaged the possibility of that ever happening - but it's fun to think about any which way xD I personally like to imagine she does gain an inch!

As for what she feels regarding this, hmmm, not a lot because her skillset has always mattered more to her than physical attributes and this attitude is here to stay, but if we talk about post-canon Annie who's hit by a 10000 tonne truck of new feelings and emotions, then it won't be too wrong if I say it makes her insecure sometimes???

Coming to the whole period thing - I have a very very specific hc about this, and it is that she doesn't get them until her powers are gone haha xD It's just an idea of mine but playing around with some vague titan science and biology ideas, the shifter powers do not prevent her puberty from kicking in, per se, but rather that it "wicks away" the physical aches, pains, and bleeding. So Annie experiences a normal period as we know it, only post-rumbling. (If you're a reader of VBEOW this is actually a major and recurring point of discussion and there's a lot of involvement of Armin and Pieck in this subject!)

As for girly time with Pieck, ahahaha xD Omg post-canon Pikuani is one of my favourite things ever, because I really REALLY love thinking about these two finding comfort and friendship and "sisterhood", shall we say? in each other after all this time being separated. With Annie's aloof personality, it's just my hc that during her training years before being sent off to Paradis, she didn't really get to "bond" with Pieck. But post-canon? So much time to get close and silly and confess some of their deepest feelings to each other, under the reassurance that, here is someone just like me who has all the pains I do and will understand me :>

[throwawayasoiafaccount]

Frankly, I don’t agree with your conclusion.

The reality is that Rhaegar and Elia’s marriage was loveless (in a romantic sense) and was arranged by Aerys. There’s been much conjecture over why Aerys chose Elia and therefore Dorne, but most agree that it was a mix of reasons, three being that Elia had Targaryen blood, by marrying Rhaegar to Dorne Aerys could isolate Rhaegar’s growing power block, and it’d insult Tywin. Therefore we readers know this wasn’t a normal marriage. And GRRM, if I’m remembering correctly, called Rhaegar and Elia’s marriage a tragedy.

So, from what little we know it’s fairly easy to conclude that this marriage was not healthy for either party.

When people use the arranged marriage “excuse” they’re not really excusing anything, because they don’t attach the normal standards of marriage to this relationship. The way I see it, most arranged marriages are legal ways to buy and sell people for profit under the guise of marital sanctimony. So to me, both parties (Rhaegar and Elia) should have been able to have lovers outside of their arranged marriage, however, that was not possible because of the patriarchal standards women are unfairly expected to uphold and subject themselves to.

The only “cheating” I wouldn’t justify would be cheating between couples that actually fell in love. Therefore, your usage of Ned Stark to support your point actually doesn’t in my eyes as his and Catelyn’s marriage is love based. There is a clear difference here and equating their marriage to Rhaegar and Elia’s is doing a disservice to GRRM’s writing and any reader of ASOIAF.

To go over some of the other points you made 1) the idea that Rhaegar got with Lyanna specifically for the prophecy is bs that’s been consumed and regurgitated way too many times and has no standing as a legitimate theory if you actually read the books. 2) The idea that people would readily support Rhaegar and Lyanna’s relationship is iffy at best. You’re overstating the North’s standing and image as to many in the South the Northerners are nothing more than barbarians who worship tree gods. The only reason the North seems to have a better standing than Dorne at the moment is because of Ned and Cat’s relationships outside of the North. So no, the world wouldn’t just fall over at Lyanna’s feet and abandon Elia because of xenophobia. If anything, Lyanna and Jon would be the ones in need of protection. 3) Believing that Elia and her children’s lives would be in danger is, quite frankly, an unnecessary concern when taking into account Lyanna and Rhaegar’s personalities and the little we know about Rhaegar’s relationship with his children (he clearly loved them and had a good relationship with them).

To play the devil’s advocate for a sec, I want to say that I completely understand the distaste towards cheating and anything of it’s like. I really do understand why people take issue with Rhaegar and Lyanna’s relationship, however, when taking the entire situation into account I don’t believe that this actually qualifies as “cheating” as we know it, nor do I think it’s okay for stan’s to completely warp a character just because Rhaegar did something as human as falling in love outside of his arranged marriage.

Also, I as a reader love the complexity of this situation. I understand all parties and sympathize with all characters. Frankly, all three characters got the short end of the stick and it’s terrible, but I don’t think it’s the characters and their actions that need changing, I think it’s the volatile system that needs to be upended and rebuilt from the ground up.

Why do people in this fandom normalize an affair between Rhaegar and Lyanna?

Because Rhaegar’s marriage was arranged. So it means the reason for arranged marriage is an excuse for cheating and cheating with a highborn woman and running away with her?

Not like that. Just because the marriage was arranged doesn't make it an excuse to affair and run away with the other woman, especially to fulfill the prophecy.

If the three of them were still alive after the rebellion. And People knew the relationships between Rhaegar and Lyanna, the people would surely support them. Because Lyanna is from the North and she is the Stark. And that put Elia and her children's lives in danger. It can happen like the Blackfyre rebellion. Because a lot of people are racist and sentimental towards Dornish.

This fandom is sick of normalizing an affair between Rhaegar and Lyanna. But if happens to Ned Stark if he really has an affair or their other favorite character in the affair, they will be mad.

[levelzeo]

Whenever I get stuck on a hard level of a video game, for some reason my stress response is the overwhelming desire to fucking BITE something.

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.