#i do like others more but its required
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tagged by @rivensbane tyty!! this is such a fun prompt
rules: make a poll with your top 5 favorite antagonists and ask your followers to vote for their favorite.
(I know that I'm going to forget some faves but just off the top of my head...)
(feel free to rb to get a bigger sample size) As your local villains lover I have SO many others, many just in Destiny alone and again I KNOW I forgot a lot but here's ONLY 5
keeping the chain going im tagging: @sotc @plushchimera @cytharat @drhu0806 @camelliagwerm @susandsnell @elegiacescapist @kornyo as always no pressure to do this (or do it again if you already have) but I lov your guys takes so enjoy!
#tagging meme#antagonist poll#i COULDNT leave uldren off this poll and he had to be first by virtue of my blog#i do like others more but its required
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fandom talks too little about hylla and reyna. reyna killed her father when she thought he'd killed hylla. hylla dragged them out of puerto rico and found them sanctuary and employment on circe's island AND became one of circe's favorites. then when they got captured by blackbeard hylla also got them out of that situation by out-pirating literal immortal pirates. then in a span of three years, they split up, found their own ways to the amazons and cj, and became the leaders of their respective factions. when hylla's queenship was being threatened by otrera in son, she plotted a counter-coup and defeated an amazon queen who couldn't die two nights in a row in one-on-one combat, THEN led her cavalry to camp jupiter. (ik this woman slept like a corpse for a week afterwards). hylla used reyna as an absolutely ruthless bait-and-switch to capture orion, and all reyna said in response to that was, "bet." reyna carries insurmountable amounts of both guilt and gratitude towards her sister. even though they havent seen each other in a while, hylla still drops everything and does everything in her power to save her baby sister when she knows reyna needs her.
#like they are an ABSOLUTELY insane sibling duo. NO ONE IS DOING IT LIKE THEM#also the siblingism of committing indescribable sacrifices for each other then. never talking about it ever again. not even to say thanks.#so real#if not for the running trend of rick's female characters needing to either get a love interest or become celibate#i could almost accept reyna's joining the hunt as a 'ITS AWKWARD AROUND MY SISTER OK' thing LMFAO#also like can we talk about how shitty it is for rick to have written the amazons Like That#like ah yes the two women-run societies in the greco-roman verse:#the eternally celibate pre-teen girl scouts and the takes-femdom-too-seriously corporate shipping evil overlords#kmsing#rick wanted to do adult stuff soooooo bad in hoo but he cant write things that require more than 5 minutes of planning and worldbuildin#and the amazons were such a good example of that. so what we get is a 'teehee feminism girlboss men are beneath us' joke that feels#VERY UNCOMFORTABLE and wildly out of place in the pjoverse#the hunt is very often discussed in rr crit but the amazons not as much#unless it's to say like 'augh the amazons are so gross they're literally pro-slavery' which. my guy hylla and co did not make that#autonomous decision. rick did.#i need to stop this tag ramble somewhere so this will be it but i have so many thoughts about how hylla and reyna were handled#hylla ramirez arellano#reyna avila ramirez arellano#rr crit#my meta
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still on that robot kick
#transformers#tf idw#megatron#roller#rung#red alert#bpjd#a lil bits there at least#doodle#finished lost light the other day and uurrhhgh i need more#miss them already#im so lost in the optymus one since its like requiring crossover reading which i dont want to do. atm#why is wheelie with prowl and does it ever explain that? did i miss it? stay away from my son#also i still dont understand that time rung drank rollers juice. did he just take a sip without asking or did roller offer him his?#if the latter did he go “oh right the crack” or think rung wouldnt notice
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It's a time-honoured tradition- every time Sam comes across Izzy (and Ed) in their travels, he asks Izzy to marry him. And every time, Izzy turns him down.
At this point, Sam is asking more for the sake of it than any belief Izzy will ever say yes, a remnant of childhood dedication touched with 30 years of heartbreak and regret- though even now, a small part of him still holds out hope. Sam's promises have only got more extravagant over the years, from a job as his first mate, to a captaincy, a fleet at his command, a whole fucking island if that's what Izzy wants- but he knows it isn't though, not really. If Izzy was ever going to agree to marry him, to leave his life and go with Sam, it wouldn't be for anything Sam could offer him. Izzy never did care for flashy shows of wealth, for a ship or to be captain. The only thing that ever mattered to him was loyalty given, and loyalty shown in return.
It all comes to a head after Stede left and came back, after Izzy lost a toe, lost his leg. Sam hasn't seen him since before things with Ed started to really slide off the rails, before stress permanently set into the lines of Izzy’s face. So, when he sees a dishevelled man with a hoof for a leg in a no-name port, he doesn't even consider the idea that he might know him. It's only when he turns towards him, and Sam catches a glance at those oh too familiar tattoos, he realises this is Izzy, his Izzy, that stands before him.
Knowing Izzy's discomfort with pity, he doesn't treat him any differently than he would in years gone by, positioning himself in Izzy's line of sight before approaching and sweeping him up into a bone crushing hug.
“Israel-goddamn-Hands!” he exclaims, as Izzy grumbles back a begrudging “Samuel-fucking-Bellamy”, a tradition almost as old as their friendship itself. Izzy might not hug him back, but he can’t keep the corner of his mouth from twitching, just for a second.
(If Sam holds Izzy a little tighter and a little longer than usual, well. That's his business)
By the time Sam lets go, most of the crew has appeared in the town square, drawn in by the commotion. They may have given Izzy his leg and welcomed him as one of them, but still there’s an underlying tension, with nobody quite ready to set aside everything that happened before the Kraken. Seeing him cosying up to an unknown man sets everyone on edge, unsure whether to come to their first mate’s aid, or to assume that they've been betrayed once again.
When Ed sees that the yelling was Sam, his hand goes tense where it's held in Stede's. He knows the routine, has seen it more times than he can count, but as he watches them part he realises that this is the first time in a long time he's unsure of what Izzy's response will be.
Knowing that something’s different, knowing that Izzy's feeling vulnerable already, Sam doesn't go for the same flashy proposal he’s been giving for years. He doesn't promise Izzy the world, he doesn't cause a scene (or, any more of a scene than he already has, anyway). He looks at the fractured man in front of him, takes his face in his hands, and says the exact same thing to him he said when they were little more than boys. “Israel, I have to ask you. I know what you'll say, but I have to try. Come with me. Marry me and sail away with me. I'll keep you safe”
And Izzy… hesitates. He glances over at Ed, at Stede, and says to Sam “...We’re staying in port for a week. Ask me again then”
That's the moment Sam knows there is something deeply, horribly, wrong. He's not just looking at an Izzy who got seriously injured in a fight and is struggling to cope, this is something so much bigger than that- and that Ed has something to do with it. Izzy wouldn't even be considering leaving if he didn't. Whether it was negligence or something more sinister, Sam doesn't yet know, but he intends to find out.
#i feel like the little paragraph about the crew is real clunky and out of place but i wanted some kind of establishment of where those#dynamics are at. its important that the crew is something for izzy to consider in his decision; but also that their relationship isnt so#solid he would stay for them alone; yknow?#im sorta aiming for a s2e5 era but like. early in those themes. he cant be all sorted yet i need him to be struggling#anyway this is part of a much larger scenario in my head that im never ever doing anything with but i wrote THIS bit in a daze in like. jun#and i got thinking about it again and i think?? it holds its own as a 'hey think about THIS' snippet. idk you decide#youre welcome to interpret this as solo bellhands but in my head it Has morphed into sam/izzy/ed/stede#because i cant not put edizzy in things any more. izzy has two hands#i also think the comedy potential of one of your boyfriends HATING your other boyfriend is gold. 10/10 dynamic#stede is mostly along for the ride in this but also i think they need him#aaaaand. the sam/ed bracket i think can only be closed in exceptional circumstances. i think they 'hate' each other too much#...which is WHY someones getting kidnapped!!! yay#anyway its all irrelevant because ill never write it out. i can do silly chill things but thatll require work#nyxtalks#ofmd#our flag means death#izzy hands#israel hands#sam bellamy#bellhands#i wanna also say. the general concept of repeated sam proposals has been floating around my head forever#it used to be a more silly thing like i referenced at the start but. s2 gave me angsty feelings i guess#i cant not have izzy have feelings for ed right now which inherently adds layers to Any bellhands scenarios i think.#but yeah. its a Classic Bellhands vibe for me. sam seeing izzy at sea or on shore and asking him to marry him (again)#i like to do this with jackie too. i think i just want that man to be obnoxiously desired#(theres also layers of my personal hornigold era lore built into this but i hope it holds up without u knowing it. tldr. sam lost izzy by#being an idiot n fumbling the bag. thats what matters. izzy went with ed and sams been trying to fix it ever since)#i probably should have readmore'd this but i didnt think it was Quite long enough. or had a good break point. sorry <3
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devotionduo so codependent that when they try to be less so they end up hurting each other what if i kms
#mine.txt#zam hated being relied on so Heavily in s5 so now mapicc values team interindependence to a level that i dont think?? hes had before#which means hes taken more liberty in grinding for himself and his teammates a lot more than he used to#and because zam places a lot of value in himself in being the team grinder he feels useless and unneded#and since zams a huge grinder it means mapiccs main method of helping him is through violence but since hes a pacifist this season#and while technically zam is fine with other ppl killing and most importantly killing For him; he doesnt really have any beef that requires#killing as a form of revenge which means mapicc cant do the main thing that zam (and anyone else really) uses him for#and they both want to do and be more for the other but theyre stuck at a standstill cause theyre in uncharted territory#cause theyre friendly but not teamed (or even pseudo-teamed like in early s5)#i will say tho mapes more active in trying to find ways to hang out with zam#but if there isnt a clear opportunity to do so hes so Weird about it lmao like he basically just kinda. hovers over him lmao#whether in chat or otherwise#but when an opportunity Does present itself tho he seizes on it basically immediately#like the stalking is easy pickings but theres also gaias hand and literally anytime zam asks him to kill someone for him#ok but seriously tho the fact that mapicc basically declared them as teammates (even if its not official)#after he finished with the stalking was so sdfsdklaghsaljh#like bruh why does zam even have doubts about mapicc prioritizing him above everyone else he doesnt even do all that for his actual team 😭#devotions
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It's kinda shocking to me how few people seem to know how prevalent the 'my great grandmother was cherokee' myth is and how it's almost never actually true, especially when it comes with things like 'never signed up' or 'fell off the trail' or 'courthouse burned down destorying the documentation' etc etc.
People just don't even seem to know the history like.. when the Trail happened. My great great great grandfather was 2 years old during Removal in 1838, so peoples 'my great grandmother hid in the mountains!' is so clearly wrong. And we have rolls. From before and after removal, rolls done by cherokee nation and others by the government, rolls that were not stored in one random flammable courthouse. It's not difficult to find the actual evidence of ancestry.
And just.. there are lots of ways those family stories get started. It was a practice during the confederacy to claim cherokee ancestry to show one's family had 'deep roots in the south' that they were there before the cherokee were removed. Many people pretended to be cherokee and applied for the Guion-Miller payout just to try to steal money meant for cherokees - 2/3rds of the applicants were denied for having 0 proof of actual cherokee ancestry. [We even see lawyers advertising signing up for the Miller roll just to try to get free money.] And the myth even started in some families in the cherokee land lotteries, where the land stolen from us was raffled off, including the house and everything that was left behind when the cherokees were removed. We have seen people whose families just take these things stolen from the cherokee family and adopt them into their own family story, saying that they were cherokee themselves.
If you had some family story about being cherokee and you wanna have proof one way or the other, check out this Facebook group run by expert cherokee genealogists that do research for free. Just please read the rules fully and respect the researchers. They run thousands of people's ancestries a year and their average is only around 0.7% of lines they run actually end up having true cherokee ancestry.
#and ive heard even dumber origins of the cherokee family myth#such as an ancestor having a silly sounding name so the descendents just go 'oh she mustve been an indian!!!'#i was one of the few people who had my ancestry done on the facebook and had genuine cherokee ancestry#[though i had found it before it was just really validating to get it double checked and i started finding cousins (:]#like. i was told once when i was a kid by my grandma that my dad had cherokee ancestry and i didnt believe her. its wild that so many peopl#will make it a Fixture of their identity [or even just smth they bring up ever] with Zero proof#at least for cherokees from what ive seen its usually considered really disrespectful to claim to have cherokee ancestry without#actually having the documentation [like ancestors on the rolls]#and no a dna test doesnt count. nor does 'my dad is Clearly not white!' or 'high cheekbones' or old family photos or anything#i had this discussion with someone recently whose dad had been calling himself 3/4 native but didnt know exactly what nation ???? hello?#and its like... sorry but ur dad is like. italian lol.#[and blood quantum is bullshit anyway im tired of the 'im 1/16 cherokee' comments its dumb#cherokee nation does not have a blood quantum requirement. its pointless bringing it up in the discussion of who is or isnt cherokee]#also mandatory disclaimer that im reconnecting. i didnt grow up connected to the culture of even knowing my ancestry#this is all from my looking into this stuff over the past year or so. i cant claim to be an authority over anything regarding this#this is p much all my repeating things ive heard said by people who know a lot more than i do haha#man. and this isnt even starting to get into the fake tribe stuff. the only legit cherokee groups are the 3 federally recognized bands#cherokee nation of oklahoma. united keetoowah band. and the eastern band of cherokee indians.#any others that are state recognized or not at all arent acknowledged as legitimate by any of the legit cherokee groups#anyway. my final message goodb.ye#cherokee#tsalagi
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RANDOM TADC DISCUSSION ASK UPON YE!!!!!! i hope it's alright to pop in with this! i have some thoughts on Bubble.
there's something very interesting, i think, about how bubble acts. all things considered, isn't it weird that he's so dirty mouthed? (ironic for, ostensibly, a soap bubble.) bubble does a lot of gross things and, independently of that, makes a lot of inappropriate jokes and innuendoes. this coming from an npc created by a A.I ringleader who tries really hard to make sure everything is family friendly!
caine keeps popping and chastising bubble, and it happens so often we don't actually get too much dialogue from him. bubble steps out of line so far so as to have to be CENSORED! like, straight up bleeped out. one would figure that an npc like him would follow the profanity guidelines (loose as they seem to be) automatically, or at least *care* about them, and therefore not need to be censored, but he does need to be censored! he's literally made to be a character in a game, a MAIN character, at that, and he keeps breaking the rules! what's up with that?
something tells me that i'm maybe not the first person to ever say that there's something weird about bubble, but there's something weird about bubble!!! it's one thing for caine to not even try to reign in other npcs, but why can't he reign in bubble even though he wants to and tries to? and why IS bubble so weird in the first place? much to think about...
RANDOM TADC DISCUSSION ASK END.
itss absolutely alright!!!! i love when ppl send discussion asks :D!!!!!
i think about this sometimes.... i havent given it TOO much thought but sometimes i am very confused by bubbles whole deal. he lives in caines hat. caine doesnt understand him (or at least, caine implies as much)
ive seen the interpretation that caine and bubble are like. deliberately doing bits. which i REALLY like the idea of but thats not really certain, and even still, why WOULD bubble be so profane??? caine seems adamantly opposed to anything not immediately family-friendly so i cannot fathom why they wouldve done that. even w that interpretation it implies that bubble is STILL sometimes just doing things caine doesnt want him to
in general bubble confuses me. i dont think about him often because i cannot comprehend why hes like that. when caine mentions the new immersive ai in ep 2, its unclear to me just how much more immersive "57% more" is. especially since like. he says hes 'testing out a new ai,' so its ambiguous if hes saying everyone in the adventure is using that new ai or if gummigoo WAS the ai (if so, why would caine only implement the ai thats supposed to be appealing to ONE character in the adventure?). so then it gets confusing how alive npcs in the game are
is the gloink queen alive? is martha mildenhall alive??? were the souls in ep 3 alive, did caine code them to know about queenie???????? how much can they act on their own?? it SEEMS like a lot
were all npcs upgraded with this ai or was it truly just gummigoo? was caine able to give everyone that much complexity off the bat and just didnt until episode 2? is bubble more less or just as complex as the gloink queen in ep 1, before caine was testing out the new ai?
all the ais in the game ALSO generally seem to have knowledge of mature subjects, which is an incredibly bold move on caines part. i mean, we dont know this for sure, but given the joke between gummigoo and chad in ep 4, or whatever it is the gloink queen tells pomni, and all the things bubble says, they just... know about these subjects. why did caine give the npcs in this game that knowledge?
(i mean, it could be a case of caine has ALL that knowledge himself. specifically given to him so he can curb it. but then why would he bother giving the npcs that knowledge? and on that note, its so unclear how much knowledge caine has... he knows intricate details about the inside of a mcdonalds. why does he know that? how much knowledge does he have of everything outside of the circus? id imagine hes out of date... but its still incredibly in-depth conceptually and visually. WHY does he know what a pacifist route is. not that thats a new concept but afaik that term for it has specific contexts for why itd be used)
AND THEN. aside from gummigoo theres like. dr football and that weird background mannequin in ep 3. which like yeah theyre there as jokes but considering caines hesitance to allow npcs to stay in the circus entirely, it implies that caine genuinely cannot control all of them, which is weird. and extends to bubble
in general bubble is like. he READS as important. during the character intro teasers, bubble was one of them. why was BUBBLE important enough to have a whole teaser dedicated to him? AND to appear in two of them???
imo, its important to note like. the first sections of any piece of media- whats said, what characters are present, what information its given. and tadc throws me off so hard, because one of the VERY first things the show establishes is that bubble is.... there. caine is your ringmaster and heres bubble too. is he comic relief or is there a reason hes being presented as important? is he just an extension of caine?
despite this, gooseworx has mentioned that bubble doesnt even interact with anyone but caine throughout the whole show…
^ post that Haunts Me. gooseworx is known to lie sometimes but . i jsut dont understand. what is his deal. he lives in caines hat. is he even important. is he his OWN rogue ai thats just kinda silly. i dont understand him. hes scary
#tadc#tadc bubble#ask#THANK YOU for the ask!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D#i get excited to have any excuse to ramblle about Anything HAHA#i do wish i had a more substantial reply other than 'idk either'#but truly. idk either#so many thoughts but nothing thats actually... conclusive. or means anything#i cannot tell if bubbles existence is a joke or if hes gonna be genuinely important. its one of the two#or... some blend. maybe. somehow????#hes scary...#hes scary to me as someone who likes media analysis. bc i truly have no clue what his deal is#bubble is a weapon against people like me HAHA#theres a lot of theories out there abt him i could bring up too but i dont know all of them super indepth#and some hinge on OTHER theories that require their own discussion#long post#edit im thinking about it more and i think atm i just see him as like...#a narrative extension of caine#but thats subject to change for sure...
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Where my Eddie meta differs from the popular fanon is I don't think all his problems are because he's gay and I don't think kissing a man would heal him or really benefit him much at all. (He is gay but that's not important right now)
#adding the last line so people dont think this is a straight eddie post#people like to go on about repression but the thing is i dont think hes repressing being gay#i think he genuinely doesnt know#buck 🤝 eddie thinking everyone checks out men#whether he is gay or bi or whatever he clearly believes he is attracted to women and is trying in his relationships#and is confused when they dont work out#obviously his gayest relationship/breakup was ana because they were going to d- shot by fox snipers#but to him he just saw it as him losing attraction#(there is gay meta you could do here with his reaction to that being to just stick it out and his only other real relationship at that point#having been with shannon the mother of his child)#yet for some reason people seem to have decided he knows hes gay and is stringing women along??#if eddie knew he was gay i really believe he would not date#and also he would already be with buck but this aint about him#anyway my main thing is eddie has a lot of problems and torments but i dont think being gay is one of them#and even if he knew he was gay that would not help much in this scenario besides being with his soulmate#which would heal him in many ways#but the chris and his parents problems would still be there#and kissing a random man or being with a random man would do nothing for him#buck had to realize that while it was important to realize he was bi it also didnt heal him#i dont think eddie would even have that i really think he would just go oh okay well anyway#im rambling its not even 9am but back to the repression repressing it would require him to know it and i dont think he does#and argument could be made for him repressing his love for buck but i dont think thats exactly it either#i might make a another post more about that so im going to hold that thought#but eddie is typically very self aware so maybe thats soke of where the idea comes from but in line with that self awareness#i dont think he would date women or say hes straight if he was aware he was gay even if it was something he was repressing#(i also dont really think he would repress being gay if he did know)#eddie diaz#original txt.
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guys ive been drawing so much lately I've been starting to actually hate it 🙁
#i LOVE drawing and always wanna do it#but lately I feel like I'm being forced to draw stuff 🥲 even if it's of my own doing#art class. the school project I just started. the animations I make. other stuff.#I feel like I'm constantly on time limits for them (and for some of them i AM 😭)#even if there's literally 0 reasons for me to rush myself i feel SO guilty if I don't#especially when I share the wips here and ppl leave rlly sweet comments like “this is awesome! I can't WAIT to see it done <3”#those comments make me SO happy#but once my motivation starts to wane after working on a wip for days I'm like “no I HAVE to continue I've basically promised everyone this#even if I didn't... actually promise anything to anyone.... 😬#when I asked for drawing requests a few days ago I was like “haha I'll probably only get one or two ☺️”#then they just kept on coming and coming and I'm like “FUCK. WE'RE REALLY IN IT NOW 😨 SWEET MOTHER OF PEARL WHAT HAVE I DONE”#and even though i KNOW I can take my sweet ass time on them#I'm still like “fuck. I NEED TO DO THIS NOW. I basically begged for drawing requests and it'd make them sad if I don't 😭😭”#if someone sent me a request and I havent drawn anything for you yet I'm sorry 😭😬#I know the logical answer to EVERYTHING would be “take a break doofus”#but the idea of *NOT* DRAWING OUTSIDE OF MY REQUIRED ART STUFF!!??? shiver me timbers#and now I'm just drawing. drawing. drawing. drawing. drawing. guilt. procrastination. more guilt.#I draw for SO MANY “pick how you do it” school projects outside of my art classes mostly bc its the easiest option LMAO#but then I get home after doing that all day and im like. fuck. there's more to draw. more to do. I don't wanna do it.#but I'm extremely bored and dont know what to do without it 🙁#you could probably write a poem out of that or something ngl LOL#anyways sorry for being a bummer. I'm gonna keep drawing for my school project after this bc I havent learned a thing 🥲 ciao ✌️#rant#rant post#vent post#artist vent#blog#*falls over dead*#I'll post like normal after this dw
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people are saying he « led her on » because he did. the fact that he kissed her in the first episode set the tone for the rest of the season and if you can’t perceive the flirting I’m sorry but how?? he didn’t make anything clear he sent the craziest mixed signals in the world. there’s nothing revolutionary about claiming that Martha was being pushy toward someone who was clearly not interested it’s 1) weird to claim in what it suggests about her 2) factually not true.
I wasn’t gonna respond to this at first because the top half of this ask is pretty much just individual interpretation and I don’t really care about it. Like, no, to me, the Doctor doesn’t seem especially flirty towards Martha. He’s just sort of Like That. That’s his damage, you know, Mr. I need to traumadump on anyone who tolerates being around me for more than five minutes. Mr. If I don’t develop an intensely codependent emotional bond with the companion I have currently I’ll die. It doesn’t read to me as him trying to lead her on because that bit’s honest, and he does it with damn near every companion he’s ever had.
And if nothing else, because we do see Ten when he tries to flirt intentionally and he’s a fuckin dork about it. Kind of guy who looked up romance in the dictionary and took notes. Kinda guy who draws diagrams to maximize kissing potential. It would have been obvious even to me (<- romance-blind as all fuck) if he was flirting with Martha on purpose because he’s not smooth at all; he flirts like he’s gotten lines in a play and he’s super excited to be the main star.
But anyway, as I was saying, that’s just how I see it. And if you see it different, no skin off my back, I just disagree.
But I take umbrage with you putting words in my mouth. I never said Martha was pushy towards him. Because yeah, she’s not. If I implied that she was, then it was a result of poor phrasing on my part. Martha’s not at fault for what she feels, for wanting there to come something of it. No more at fault than the Doctor is for not returning those feelings. It’s a bit weird that you’re assuming that I think one of them has to be the bad guy here when that was the opposite of what I was saying. My point was: When it comes to their romantic subtext of their relationship, it’s weird to pretend like either of them are to blame for them not being in a relationship at the end of s3, and even weirder to assert that as part of why Martha supposedly wouldn’t like the Doctor afterwards when they’re. friends. they continue to be friends into s4.
Martha’s not pushy. She has a crush on her friend. It happens. He doesn’t return it. This also happens. Both of these facts are pushed to the extreme because he’s a time-traveling alien with poor emotional skills and she’s put herself in the position of needing to help him from minute one of meeting each other. That’s why it’s fun to watch, because the Doctor is both so open and so unavailable in turns, because Martha’s feelings for him grow and change as she knows more about her Doctor until she decides to step back.
I don’t know, man. You seem to be coming at this as if one of them has to be The Problem™️. I don’t think either of them is, not so definitively. I think boiling their relationship down to that is reductive and an insult to the way they both grow over s3, to Martha’s choice to continue to be his friend while also establishing her own boundaries, to the fact that the Doctor is able to let her go without immediately trying to kill himself afterwards when she’s not there to catch him.
#the thing about the doctor is that if you want to tell me that he’s Extra Special Flirty With This Companion.#i dunno. feels like something that requires a lot of proof lmao. because the doctor is a freak who latches onto people like a barnacle and#gets way too invested way too quick and holds on like he’ll die if he even thinks of letting go. he’s just like that. he’s just like that.#he’s like that with rose he’s like that with martha he’s like that with donna amy clara bill!!!! these relationships are all different but#the common core is that the doctor is a freak! the doctor clings on too tight!!! the doctor will fuck you up he loves you so much!!!#idk! is it more leading on for the doctor to kiss martha to pull off a plan than it is for him to reshape amy’s life around him on accident#and then show up when she’s an adult to finally whisk her away. or to let clara do emotional infidelity with him for months while#insisting that he’s not her boyfriend. i don’t think ever he is. i think he’s just like gravity. mavity. you’re gonna orbit him because he’s#something cosmic and unknowable. and he’s also your best friend. he’s always too much and too tangible all at once.#am i making any sense here.#ask#martha jones#the doctor#tenth doctor#doctor who#idk man its like 7 in the morning where i am im not awake enough to talk martha/ten semantics. personally i think they should have made out#on screen even more without ever clarifying the nature of their relationship so that they had even weirder and more complicated feelings#about each other.
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i wrote this as a joke because I wanted to strangle a guy watching tiktoks without headphones on the bus, but im genuinely disturbed that we've gotten to a point where convenience comes first. and it depresses me even more that its used to justify and monetize greed
#like we have so many ways of doing things that could help us in the long run but because we're told it requires more work we just cant#its too resource intensive. or maybe its too much to maintain. we have to overlook benefits so money can go into more important things#we teach each other to do things a certain way so it works for everyone but who was it convenient for first? what abt who it might hurt?#i have to wonder if the rules our current system uses is worth listening to or following if it doesnt have our best interests in mind. u an#me and the ppl around us.. would we be better off if i ate my meals knowing the person who grew it wanted to feed others the way they could#feed themselves? and that isnt to say we're going to be happy doing it but i guess satisfied that its helping someone instead of quietly#accepting that itll eventually go in the dumpster behind a grocery store because it stopped looking appetizing or it wasnt on sale anymore#what about building homes so we can shelter each other? what if we were satisfied with what we did because we knew it would be paid back#with kindness? isnt that what we evolved to do?? heal each others bones and tell stories and help each other??#why dont houses come with solar panels or generators unless we find a way to make people pay to use the sun? why is our pooled money used#to fund genocides instead of education and hospitals? whose interests and convenience came first when we started this??#i wont pretend to know the answer because i dont. but we all know we're miserable and im sorry to say that i cant see myself fighting#for a world that wont fight for me too. why do we work if we cant live from it?? why did they stop us from plucking more teeth from our#bosses until they could build more walls around themselves and then go back to underpaying us??#im so tired. i cant even imagine making it to age 70#yapping#vent
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Target Solas may be saving my life actually
#in the funniest way possible#bc i started researching target jobs for the retail rifts fic#and discovered that just working as a TL for target#i would make more $#than as a resident#like i know i know. its cheap labor for the hosp#but how in the hell is this fair. lmao like. how in the hell am i valued so little#and if you for a second think ''it shouldn't be about the money''#stfu.#its not about the money. its about the absolute dogshit hours. working 100 hrs a week bc programs violate the laws all the time#not being able to see a therapist for fear of program backlash bc they can and will and have fired residents over that#its about not being compensated or valued at an appropriate level for the amount of time and education required#like genuinely. fuck this#im so bitter and drained by it all#could write essays on why and how badly the system needs change#but ive decided it isnt worth it#its not worth it and i dont want to do this anymore#ive already started to line up some other opportunities#bc genuinely. seriously. wholeheartedly. fuck this
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Something that always annoys me is the idea only 1 language learning method works. Which is not true. While it may be possible that, for a particular individual, only a few out of many study methods may work well enough for That Individual to make progress and stay motivated... that doesn't mean all the other study methods won't work for anyone else out there, or that those few methods will work for every other given person.
Obviously if you've been studying a while, then you already figured out what kinds of things work for you and don't. If you're a beginner, just wading into studying?
I would suggest you simply look for study methods that: 1. Teach you new things regularly, 2. Review and practice things you've learned, 3. Include studying things you need for your particular goals (for example if your goal is to read X book then the study materials at some point should involve reading practice and some words the book contains, if your goal is to talk about Y then the study materials should include some information about pronunciation and words you'll need to be able to say).
As you can imagine, a TON of study materials will meet these requirements. And you can study a given skill in a LOT of ways.
(Reading is my focus lol so just for reading, a beginner might: do vocabulary study with lists or conversations with native speakers or watching shows and looking words up or listening to dialogues with a transcript like in a textbook or graded readers or a picture book with word labels in the target language or a video game with labelled objects in target language, all of those things as long as your vocabulary is improving or reading practice is happening would help you make progress). So to improve reading skill as a beginner: you could study with a textbook, a podcast with transcript, a classroom or tutor with words written down in target language (like TPRS), a video game, a TV show and a translate app on your phone, a friend you talk with (who either writes words down or you look up words you hear with a translate app), a friend you text with, srs flashcards like anki (provided there's text) etc. As long as there's new words, and/or you're practicing reading, the study method may work. If it works will come down to if you can stay motivated doing it regularly, and make sure you regularly learn some new things and review/practice things you've already studied.
So consider those things when you see people selling a study method as a product (especially when it's costing you money). Consider if it teaches you NEW things, and are those new things related to your goals, and how MUCH new stuff will it teach you before you finish it? Consider if it provides review or practice, or if you can use it's materials to review on your own making up your own method, or if you'll need to do separate review/practice.
So examples:
LingQ. Can it teach you many new words? Yes, thousands, since you can import any texts you want when you get done with their provided material (I have no idea how much their beginner material covers though in terms of words... I would hope 1000-3000 words but that can be researched). Is your goal reading? It's suited to reading, so you will practice and review often with it. Cost? I think it was $12 a month when I last had it, and the price may have increased. Is it worth it? Depends on a learner's needs. I found it was wasting my money, so I chose to use free tools like Pleco and Readibu apps - since those apps are suited for Chinese learners and have better translations, Pleco has better paid graded reader material if I was going to spend money, and both Pleco and Readibu let me import texts so I can learn thousands of new words just like LingQ but free. Now that I'm not a beginner, I often use Microsoft Edge to read chinese... since I can still click-translate words easily (all my web browsers have that tool free), and Edge's TTS voice is helpful for pronunciation and sounds quite good. I read webnovels online so Edge works well. But it's translations aren't as good as Pleco or Readibu, so if I still needed translations more I would use them. So... is LingQ a good study method? Its certainly a study method marketed to buy. Well... the method is suited to improving reading skill, at least. It costs money, which is a negative, but it does offer a lot. However: everything it does regarding reading can be done free with other apps or sites or web browsers on their own. So if paying money motivates you to read... sure. LingQ does have a few word tracking features a learner may find worth the money, keeping in mind the actual read-to-learn method can be done free without lingq. (Also... while LingQ is a valid option for improving reading, if the learners goal is speaking then it would be important to think of what study activities the learner will do OUTSIDE of LingQ to improve speaking... because I've seen how LingQ is marketed as "how to learn a language" but it's only focused on some skills. It has vocabulary and grammar in some sense, since you'll read a lot and encounter new words and structures. But it doesnt have speaking or writing practice at least last time I was on it. Those activities would need to be worked on, on your own).
You can do that kind of cost/benefit contemplating with any study method material you see being sold. Amother example: there's a beginner Mandarin course called Mandarin Blueprint. It teaches like 800 words. Thats all. It may be worthwhile for a beginner... who still needs to learn 800 common words. But if you already know a few hundred words, the benefit of the course is less, you'll need to find a new material to teach you more new stuff soon. And the price was like a few hundred for the course... which for me personally was too much to spend, when I had already learned 800 hanzi from a book that cost me 12 dollars and 2000 words from a free user made memrise deck. The course claimed to get a person speaking, competent, but anyone not a beginner would say speaking basically with 800 words is nowhere near the level of working in Chinese or just doing a lot of daily life stuff, or reading/listening to media. (Although for the motivated beginner if you're learning 800 words on your own like I was, its definitely close to the point of jumping to learn more words and start reading kids and teenager books, and watching easier shows if you're willing to look new words up). So to me... Mandarin Blueprint felt like overselling some basic beginner materials. (Again when I know several other things that teach beginner stuff either more in depth so HSK test prep classes, and college courses, or that teach beginner stuff to the same depth as Mandarin Blueprint but free).
Some study materials aren't going to act like they teach everything. I've seen chinese courses just for learning to speak tones better and general pronunciation - probably worthwhile if your goal is to improve speaking and a teacher could help improve the issues your having. But a learner needs to be aware for that course that they'll need to study vocabulary on their own, its JUST a pronunciation improvement course.
#rant#i saw a lot of comments on forums yesterday thinking automatic language growth alg was like snake oil#aka a scam. but it can be done for free (free lessons online) and for people who#learn well from visual context and guessing (i learn well that way) the lesson style DOES result in learning new words and grammar#so provided you can find ALG type free lessons that teach 1000+ words (ideally 3000+ words) then you will learn#enough grammar and words to then move onto native speaker content to continue studying. so all free#i have not seen yet how ALG helps students with speaking or writing yet though. so i can only say it for sure improves passive skills#specifically listening with new words and grammar. and listening translates to reading if you practice that on your own#even just with subtitles or podcast transcripts.#the issue for me is can i find alg courses that teach a thousand words in a timely manner (and free if thats my personal requirement)#i think Dreaming Spanish and Comprehensible Thai do have enough free courses to teach 1000+ words#so those ones would get you to possibly intermediate b1 level in passive listening skill#and then its up to you on if 1 that meets your goal 2 you learn well with that lesson type 3 you are motivated to do the lessons#like... duolingo itself is not completely useless... it teaches 3000 words on most courses (and maybe 1500 common words). the big issue for#me with duolingo is it takes me AGES to complete a lesson and complete a course (years). cause i cant focus on it#whereas with duolingos content... its beginner content. at best it will get Reading skill to A2 or low B1#and maybe other skills if you practice OUTSIDE duolingo with the words and grammar u learned.#so getting to A2 vocab shouldnt take me more than a year to learn (based on how i study). i can learn it in 6 months if i#just study a wordlist on paper and a grammar guide online. so since duolingo takes me 4 times LONGER to study than the other methods i use?#duolingo is a waste of my time. not worth it (and it markets itself as if it will get a learner to B2 when it wont. and it markets#as if 1 lesson a day is all you need. to make progress in 6 months in duolingo like my wordlist study...#you'd need to be doing duolingo 1-3 hours a day... which duolingo does not tell u to do. and most learners dont
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also i hate to admit it and i swear i DO understand the importance of them but fellas i fear i may be steadily morphing into a humanities hater
#the lack of required humanities teaching is likely directly related to why things are so fucked up stupid right now and they are SO crucial#but it is a fact that now every time i think about writing an essay i get slightly nauseous#specifically avoided taking any humanities classes this semester & ONE of my classes has an essay and im genuinely nervous abt it#i'm not a math whiz but at least it's more justifiable to be bad and hateful of numbers. shit has me- the chronic rambler- scared of words#im so. so sick of final projects. just give me a fucking bubble sheet i'm so serious it is significantly less stress and effort#why do professors act like writing a 5 page essay for 4 different classes is easier than filling out a piece of paper & leaving in an hour#and why does it feel like most of my peers AGREE. WHY WOULD YOU PREFER THAT#I GET THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE GET TEST ANXIETY BUT THAT IS LIKE TWO HOURS OF STRESS VS TWO WEEKS TO A MONTH OF STRESS I DONT GET IT#this is not a tangent because humanities classes will almost always have an essay instead of a test and it will almost always be an essay.#eye twitch. but as long as everyone else is happy about not having to circle things on a piece of paper i guess. its okay. its fine#anyway my other reasonings are that shit really is boring im sorry i cant. i cannot get into it i really do try my best#and also all the classes are annoyingly early which just really does not help their association in my brain#sigh. the humanities play a very important role in education and society as a whole and they deserve to be mandatory. get them away from me
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gender euphoria moment ! rare morgan w
#like the outfit itself was not a big deal. i didnt even wear it outside. but i looked in the mirror and felt something more than apathy#i looked in the mirror and i did not see a boy or a girl. which is in fact a big deal.#i took pictures. i fucking took pictures of myself on my own i cant emphasise how little i have ever done that. i even drew myself#i have spent my life under the pressure to look normal#it's why when i started becoming conscious of appearance i wanted to look like the average girl/boy on the street#and whenever i dress in the presence of other people i still worry about whether i will look normal. in place.#so putting on things in the locked bathroom of my own house is just. freeing i guess#i hardly ever go out which is probably half the reason for the anxiety around it#and there's like. the social expectation that you cant dress well unless you have a reason#like i literally never get to do this. let me have it#n e ways. i dont think what makes me feel gender euphoric is as easy or binary as it is with some of the people i know irl#i just! i want to look trans. i want people to look at me and be uncertain.#i always used to dress like the most “normal” person ever because i felt like it was a requirement#so it's alwayd fun to get vaguely formal with it#not a revelation exactly that if you fuck around with clothes and find what you like and wear it it's good. but worthy of note#idk where im going with this im rambling. whatever its my blog#personal posts#might post the fit on art blog bc i want attention and compliments. anyway.#<- wow im so narcissuspilled#<- me when i show myself any form of feeling toward myself that isnt hatred
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forced myself to wake up and leave my warm cozy blanky at 3:30 am in the winter to speedrun my syllabus because they gave us 12 hours to prep for our endsem are yall proud of me
#not to mention ive baaaaarely gotten sleep the past few nights because its been back 2 back exams every day#forget afternoon naps i havent even been getting more than 4 hours at NIGHT#and i am a bitch that values sleep above all else#and i got no time to prep the syllabus beforehand because of all our never ending fucking assignments#including yk. the full fledged GAME they made us code from scratch in 3 weeks without teaching us anyyy of the required tools or languages#literally speedran an entire math course with everything from number theory and graph theory to fucking induction and combinatorics#in like. 4 hours and gave my endsem NOT EVEN 12 HOURS BACK AND IT WAS 50% OF OUR FUCKING GRADE#and now i have to do it againnn for the third exam in a row at 9:30 in the fucking morning#which btw i realized LAST NIGHT. because our datesheet said the exam was at 2:30 but theyre doing it in batches#so i dont even have the morning to revise and need to pull this shit#AND THEN EVEN FOR THE COURSES WHERE I SOMEHOW COVER THE ENTIRE SYLLABUS THOROUGHLY THEY WILL GIVE THE MOST OUT OF POCKET BULLSHIT#THAT YOUVE NEVER HEARD OF IN YOUR LIFE#and after THIS exam i have to speedrun linear algebra and teach it to a bunch of kids by tomorrow morning#granted that one is on me because i couldve said no but ugh#college hateposting#in other news my ex crush wore a suit yesterday and she looked so hot she almost made me relapse into lesbianism#but i digresssssss#x am rambles#man ive missed ranting about shit on tumblr i should come back here more often
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