#i didn’t say anything but i’ve been out as nonbinary for a while

[dulcewrites]

Hmm well now that Disney went and showed their asses (again), I feel like I can say this without putting bad juju out/jinxing anything. I honestly think the writing was on the wall when amandla, who was arguably the most excited pre the show coming out, essentially went radio silent. Then my gut feeling was only compounded by them (Disney - Lucasfilms - whoever) clearly pushing Qimir/Manny as the lead… which is just not how the show works??

There are possible reasons for that. As for pushing Qimir, it’s clear he (and maybe Sol as well) ended up being breakout characters from the show. I can’t begrudge that - Qimir is interesting as hell. But we see him through the eyes of our leads - he wants an acolyte. There is no acolyte without Osha and Mae. Also why isn’t Manny being pushed in tandem with the actually lead of the show. As for Amandla not being invited to things like d23 or swcj (like Manny), I’ve seen people be like “well, they could just be taking a break considering all of the racist stuff that’s been hurled at them”. And like yeah maybe, but you’d think the people that employed them, would ya know say something about it. Especially considering that Amandla has been burdened with dealing with racist since like the age of 12.

But this is Disney and Star Wars and Lucasfilms where everyone outside of the main story gets treated like shit.

Now for the thing that I didn’t want to put out there before actual news of s2 - I’m sorry but I can’t help but feel like this is them pushing the black nonbinary lead out so they pluck parts of the acolyte for something else. Because while I don’t cruelty pass them (releasing this news on Manny’s birthday is vile), something about them dragging Manny out in particular to several events knowing they were canceling the show just doesn’t make sense? Nothing is set in stone obviously but now I’m seeing people talk about them highlighting Qimir and Darth Plagueis (literally who gives af about that hag) but gutting the story of anything else.

I hope no one takes this as me saying Manny hasn’t dealt with his fair share of shit. He’s been outspoken about how hard it is being a Filipino man in Hollywood. But at the end of the day, Qimir (and by extension Manny) being a mysterious double lightsaber wilding MALE sith gives him an element of protection Osha and Mae (and by virtue Amandla) don’t have as characters. Because notice how much of the ire with the shows casting is about the lead character(s) being black women.

Anyway this is just me rambling about something that’s been on my mind. Tbh I actually have hope that it won’t happen simply because I don’t see the creator/writers of the show being down with that. Also Manny has been vocal about supporting Amandla and not being able do this without them

[pagerspages]

Being Trans is Scary

Being transgender is scary. It took me a while to comfortably use the term “Transgender” when thinking and/or talking about myself but I am. A Transgender person is someone who does not identify as the sex/gender they were assigned at birth. I was assigned male at birth and now I identify as nonbinary. I am transgender. 

A friend of mine called me an egg the other day. Granted I did say something rather egg like. I showed this to my other friend who assured me that I was very much cracked and there was only a bit of shell left. 

I played with makeup today for the first time. I’ve worn makeup before, but this is the first time I actually went out and bought makeup and put it on myself. I wore makeup when I was in plays in middle school and I have a former friend of mine that did my makeup once. I don’t know if I’ll ever be one to wear a full face of makeup daily. Eye makeup is fun though. I will definitely do eyeliner and mascara again, maybe eyeshadow too. 

Now to the scary part I guess. I live in an area where trans people are not respected. They are ridiculed and treated as less than human, for this reason I probably wont be coming out to anyone other than a few close friends. I think like four people know right now. I was doing my makeup today with a friend of mine in her backyard when her mom came out. Her mom is one of those people who would probably not treat me very nicely. I had just about finished my lipstick when we heard the door open. I hurried and grabbed a makeup wipe and got the lipstick off and the majority of the eyeshadow. Thankfully she either just didn’t notice or didn’t say anything. 

I’m not sure why I got so scared. I mean the absolutely worst thing that could have happened is not being able to go back to their house but that wouldn’t have been the worst thing in the world. I’m an adult and the only reason that we live with our parents is because rent is out of control. I know people have it worse but like I got a very small glimpse of what could have been today. I’m willing to bet that why I have suppressed these feelings for so long is because of the area I was raised in.

Remember it’s okay to mourn the people you could have been if your situation were better. 

[glass--beach]

I've been a fan of your music long enough to remember when you used to identify as trans fem. what's it been like circling back around to that and figuring out your identity now that you're doing it sort of in the public eye?

honestly it’s been nicer this time around. i sense a kindred spirit in every trans woman i talk to and it’s really lovely hearing from those who related to my music and figured out their own identity through that. it’s giving me a space where i know i will be accepted. i still boymode pretty often on the road and before tour was nearly always boymoding… there’s almost a safety on stage but despite being literally a performance it feels more real than when i’m not presenting fem. i’ve also now been girlmode out in public a lot after shows and not attracted any negative attention which is nice. even when there was an alt right harassment campaign against the band account they were gendering me correctly.

years ago it was much tougher for me, wearing feminine clothes at random diy shows or whatever. it was often in spaces that were anti transphobia on paper but did nothing to enforce against transmisogyny in practice. even in explicitly queer spaces i felt outcast. online was even harsher - which is really what made me increasingly scared to present fem as there were more and more eyes on me. there were many many trans women i looked up to a lot then but i felt they were so much braver than me. being nonbinary and vaguely “masculine” became a shield at the cost of being called a dude or a guy or just assumed to be male absolutely constantly, and after enough of it i kinda just didn’t want to show my face anywhere… the irony of having made what many considered to be iconic transfem music while feeling so closeted myself was honestly insulting.

with the recent album release and tour it kinda hit a breaking point because i knew a big wave of misgendering was coming if i wasn’t just honest with myself and everyone else. even saying she/they was softening the blow a bit. lots of people just stuck with they. and plenty of writers & critics still seem blissfully unaware that there is anything queer about me or my band or are simply too scared to write about it, idk. but i feel like i’ve come out of my shell a good bit. i’m not just playing shows, i’ve been able to socialize and party on off days and speak my mind more freely and dress in a way that makes me feel pretty. it’s really like flipping a switch - not just for me, but everybody else. EVERYONE treats me differently when i girlmode and i love it so so much, i feel like others are more willing to open up and to treat me with kindness and (respectfully) compliment my appearance and i feel like women (cis and trans) relate to me more, which is a whole lot better than feeling like i relate to nobody most of the time. it’s an entirely different set of social scripts that just feel so much more “right” to me, so much easier for me to embody, than the male social scripts. i know a lot of people feel like gender is bullshit and bad inherently and good for them but for me that mentality was a way to hide it think. i feel absolutely liberated in embracing femininity! :) thank you for the lovely question, i have so much to say on this

[bluegumballmf]

OK SO RANT WARNING I LOVE ADAMAI

ngl i think about adamai so much like literally almost half of the time im thinking abt him so um i just wanna talk about my personal headcanons for him bc i rlly rlly like him he’s genuinely such an easy character to relate to for me because i relate to his trauma. Anyways, forgive me if you catch any spelling or grammar errors, i’m writing this with like 4 hours of sleep and dyslexia.

um so my main mental health hcs are that he has BPD, ADD (lololol fits with the name) and minor psychosis. For ADD, it’s moreseo that from what i’ve seen, adamai struggles in social cues and has a more quiet approach to his struggles, and that he acts similarly to me, and I am autistic. For psychosis, it’s sort of a baseless headcanon, I just feel like Adamai would get auditory/ tactile hallucinations.

It’s a little hard to explain why i think he has BPD cause it’s moreso things I can relate to, such as how he latches onto people rlly quick ; ie a BPD person’s “favorite person,” who is a support system and a sort of pillar/ anchor and typically end up being someone the person w/ BPD sometimes ends up changing themself for. I personally think that adamai’s had multiple favorite people, such as; grougal, qilby, phaeris, echo and oropo, and obviously, yugo. Its kinda hard for me to like. Phrase WHY i think these people are his fps, but i think it’s mostly how he values them and prioritizes them when it comes to his actions and thoughts and feelings, i mean, just take oropo for example. Adamai changed his entire body for oropo, taking the dofus in when he was still rlly young for eliatrope/dragon standards, even assuming a body he didn’t want to survive, which even then, he only did for approval and support from his FP. This actually leads me into my next headcanon,

I headcanon adamai as transfem. Specifically a trans woman. For a few reasons, which I’ve gone over in a twitter thread (same username as on here, you should go check it out, I’m WAY more active there haha) but i’ll put it here.

1. adamai doesnt feel comfortable in his body and it’s elaborated on in the show. When he’s talking to eliatrope about his body, eliatrope states that he’s “always been unique” and iirc you can see adamai’s face drop because its not exactly something he’s proud of.

2: going off the last point, he’s shown to say that the body he now has in wakfu s3-4 is one he had to adapt to survive and not the one he chose, which is parallel to some trans people never transitioning because they dont feel safe enough to do so. this is kind of a stretch but bear with me, it’s more subconcious connections than anything else.

3. (More of a joke point) BUT HE LITERALLY HAS THE SAME WAIST SIZE AS JESSICA RABBIT. WHAT. YES I’VE ACTUALLY COMPARED I AM NOT JOKING. Like here are the images (see below) for comparison. In all seriousness, while i feel like adamai’s design IS iconic and it does serve the purpose it meant to acheive, it doesn’t feel like him. Which again, is what it meant to acheive!! I’ll touch on this more in a second, but not.

4: adamai has multiple issues regarding self perception, which in a way are all similar to dysphoria. He seems to have rejection dysphoria, body dysphoria, and maybe gender dysphoria. In my view, he seems to have all three subtypes of gender dysphoria (body, mind, and social) this actually ties in to the first point, because i feel like he’d develop a sort of body dysmorphia from shifting into a body he didn’t want, rather then a body that would be more comfortable for him; the human or the dragon. Which i’m choosing to see as a representation of the two genders; with him shifting in between being a sort of safe spot, like how many trans people identify as nonbinary or bigender before transition. (Not to say that these people are any less trans then any others, i’m just going off my own perception as a trans genderfluid person!!!)

5: he’s always being forced into roles; from being raised for yugo, to being yugo’s mentor, to being grougal’s nanny, to being possessed, etc. Ad never has chances to choose any roles by himself, and it’s similar to transphobic parents stopping their trans kid from expressing themselves imo. Again, could be a stretch, but this is how i interpreted it. It’s actually kind of similar to my parents, so maybe that’s why. Though, this COULD also just be gifted kid burnout or autistic burnout OR strict parent parallels, which i also can see correspond with adamai.

6: His mental image and self worth.

Adamai’s character is heavily influenced by a lack of self worth. He measures it with other people’s perceptions of him such as oropo’s or grougal’s, and when his body is perceived negatively by himself/others, he also starts hating it and himself, which ties into the headcanon i had about him having body dysmorphia AND into the BPD favorite people!!!

7: ( sounds like a joke point but bear w me) estrogen could have saved him

And honestly, no, Im not joking. Imo, if Adamai was allowed access to an actual process to be able to feel comfortable in his own skin, it might help his mental illnesses a lot in the long run. I equate that to him getting estrogen + finally looking like himself. It could help him with the body dysmorphia and self esteem by helping him get to a place where he’s comfortable to be himself and maybe even shapeshift again. (I actually wrote a fic about this on Ao3, https://archiveofourown.org/works/55070686, if you want to read it!!)

But um yeah, thats my reasoning for the trans headcanons, onto the less mental health involved ones, more miscellaneous. (But if you’re wondering why i’m using ‘male’ pronouns on Adamai, it’s because i feel like he would still like the he/him pronouns, but would simply use she/her more post transition.)

So, i have a few, mainly for adamai during winter vs summer.

In winter,

Silverish hair to blend with the snow

hair puffs up slightly to provide more insulation

lighter pigmentation everywhere,

much sleepier, tends to nap in the snow often

And then in the summer,

Blonde hair

more pigmentation

hair is less puffy, just curly (similar to chibi’s hair!!!)

less sleepier and more energetic.

Those are the basic ones for the seasons, but i also headcanon adamai to be an ice dragon, which means his tempurature is MUCH lower then the rest of the council’s save for maybe efrim. He needs to be in the sun much more, which could be part of the reason why grougal chose oma island to raise adamai. Another headcanon is that adamai and yugo both have heterochromia!! Yugo has central heterochromia, and Adamai has sectoral heterochromia; his eyes being blue and brown. I also headcanon that he has face markings similar to his mother, but they disappear in his dragon form because he’s closer to his father then.

Um yeah, that’s kind of it for right now, i might add onto these if more come up, but i hope you enjoyed reading!! I rwally love adamai, especially in s3 and up, he’s one of the most well written traumatized character’s i’ve seen, and i ADORE the nuance behind him.

[gonzo-rella]

Not Right | Ellie Williams

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

Pride Month 2024 #6

Requested by: Anon

Hi!!! Can I request a ellie Williams (the last of us) x sibling!reader who comes out as non!binary but also like aroacd if OK? If it's a double request I'm sorry if it turns into that

Note: Anon requested that the reader be Ellie's younger sibling, but I decided to make it ambiguous, so the reader can be read as being older or younger.

Relationship(s): Ellie Williams x nonbinary!aroace!sibling!reader (platonic)

Summary: Ellie's the first to know when you realise something's not right.

Warnings: Coming out scene(s). Implied dysphoria. (Let me know if I need to add any)

Word count: 0.5k

(A/N: So, just a warning, I haven't watched the Last of Us since it came out (other than a few rewatches of Long, Long Time), and I haven't played the game at all, so this is based purely on the show version of Ellie. I wasn't 100% confident that I'd be able to do the setting right so I decided to be as vague as possible- apologies if it's distracting! I'm just more interested in writing characters and their interactions, so I try not to worry to much about setting. Anyway, I watched some compilations and rewatched my favourite episode Long, Long Time yet again to help me get back into the character(s) and the world (I know Ellie's barely in the episode but I just needed to watch my sad gay love story again). If people want me to write for this show more, I 100% am up for that; it'll be the incentive I need to rewatch it. If anything, I want to write more Ellie fics where I can pretend I'm her cool (lameass) older sibling/older sibling figure.)

Something about your body felt cumbersome today, like your clothes had bricks in the pockets. Throughout the school day, you’d barely been able to concentrate, and you were too distracted to care when it got you in trouble. You couldn’t retreat to your room fast enough, and all you could bring yourself to do was curl up in bed. You had a few hours to yourself before your roommate would be back, and you soaked up every second of it that you could.

The silence was as peaceful as it was unsettling. And, of course, you should’ve guessed who would disturb it. Without warning, the door slammed open and you jolted upright, as though waking up from a bad dream.

“Jesus fucking Christ, El!”

“Nice to see you too.”

“Could you close the door behind you at least?”

She rolled her eyes and did as she was told.

“Did you need something?” you asked.

She shrugged.

“I wanted to check in on you. You’ve looked totally out of it all day.”

“I’m fine.”

“Do I have to punch someone in the face?”

You huffed.

“No. And, even if there was someone, I wouldn’t let you get yourself into trouble again.”

“Then, what’s up?”

“I’m just not feeling great. That’s all.”

“You’re not gonna, like, blow your brains out or something, are you?”

You glared at her.

“No.”

She held up her hands defensively.

“I’m sorry for making sure you’re not gonna do something stupid.”

Despite the words ‘I’m sorry’, she didn’t sound at all apologetic.

You didn’t say anything. She sighed and sat down on the edge of your bed, then she pushed herself back to rest against the wall.

“Come on. Talk to me.”

You closed your eyes and breathed in deeply.

“I don’t know. I guess I’ve been feeling a certain way for a while now.”

“What certain way?”

“Like something’s not right. With me.”

“Like what’s not right with you?”

You rolled your eyes at her questioning, despite knowing it came from a good place.

“Like… I’m not who my body’s telling me I am.”

“Oh. So… who are you?”

“Not a boy or a girl.”

“Right. Cool. Good for you, sib.”

You looked up at her with furrowed brows.

“That’s it?”

“What, do you want, like, a party?”

“A hug would be nice.”

“If you insist.”

She grinned and crawled across the bed and threw her arms around your shoulders. You collapsed under her weight and were pinned to the mattress in a vice grip.

“Okay, I regret asking now.”

— — —

The night felt special, despite the anxiety and tension. At school, you hadn’t been allowed out at night, and neither of you had been to the woods before, yet here you and Ellie were, camping out under the stars. You lay down on the ground, side by side, looking up at the stars through the gaps in the trees.

“Hey, El?”

She hummed in response, and turned her head to look at you.

“I’ve never been in love before. Is that weird?”

“No, of course not. I don’t think there’s many people around here worth falling in love with anyways. Slim pickings, y’know?”

You chuckled.

“Maybe someday you’ll find someone,” she suggested.

“Would it be okay if I didn’t want that?”

“Sure. It’ll be a bummer to miss out on giving the whole ‘if you hurt my sibling, I’ll fucking kill you’ speech. But, if that’s not what you want, that’s okay.”

You rested your head on her shoulder.

“Thanks, El.”

[soupbtch]

I’ve been having a really tough time parsing through my feelings about this because they keep changing. It’s kind of silly, too, when you put it under a microscope. All love is, I guess. That’s what this is. And I’ve had a lifelong track record of loving things too hard. Not to say that it isn’t always worth it, though it’s hard to feel that way in the immediate aftermath of things coming to an end before you’re ready.

(Putting the rest of this under the cut because it is entirely too long and personal and self-indulgent. Yes, this is about the OFMD cancellation.)

I’m not a superstitious person, with the exception of talking about things I’m excited about. If I’m waiting for an offer letter from a new job, or to hear from someone, something to happen, I have the constant feeling that if I open my mouth and express my excitement out loud, put my intentions out into the world with my own breath and teeth, push it out with my tongue, it means the thing won’t happen. My words will shift the air and it will bite back. There is shaky, empirical evidence for this. I know that, logically. In my heart, though, the fear of vulnerability lives on. Of being known and seen and disappointed.

The last several years, I got better at guarding my heart. I built strong walls. I’ve kept myself from touching things I know will draw me in too deeply, avoided looking at things I knew would break me in half. Preemptive measures to avoid potential heartbreak. (A large reason for this, I’m sure now, was the long-term (bad) relationship I was in until 7 months ago, which demanded all of my attention and emotions to maintain to the point that anything more pressing to my heart would cause the whole house of cards to collapse around me.) I kept my distance from OFMD until I was sure it wasn’t queerbaiting, after season 1 finished airing. And even as I watched it and immediately after, I kept my mouth shut about wanting a season 2. I wasn’t back on tumblr at the time (another instance of me keeping myself from touching things that will pull me in with crushing force). I only had one real life friend to talk to about the show, and even then, I held back. Only let the words whisper out of the corner of my mouth, eyes shifting. I didn’t want to let myself slip. I didn’t want to show my heart for fear of it getting ripped out. I kept the walls up.

When the season 2 trailer dropped, I felt it creeping in, despite my best efforts. I craved it. With an affable hand, it was tapping on the gate to my heart that had been shut since I left the depths of fandoms in 2013. My bad relationship had ended just a few months prior to this. I was free-falling. Vulnerable.

Season 2 reached for my heart. Tentatively, I opened the gate. I invited it in. I dove towards it. I rejoined tumblr. The brainrot set in not shortly after, a familiar friend. The truth is, it could have been anything. It could have been Good Omens, had I opened the gate a few months earlier. It could have been fucking Doctor Who again. But it wasn’t. It was the gay pirates, the middle-aged men, the nonbinary actor playing a nonbinary character, the people of color, the music, the writing, the story, the actors.

Stede and Ed were experiencing identity crises and so was I. One of the reasons my ex cited for dumping me was that he wasn’t attracted to me anymore after the years of me slowly discovering I was queer and nonbinary while we were together. After I had top surgery, he didn’t love me anymore. He broke up with me during pride month. My identity was coming into focus gradually as the foothold slipped out from under me. Simultaneously, on my TV screen, I see Stede realize he’s in love with Ed. I see Ed lose his grip when his foothold slips out from under him, too; his shaky, fresh identity and bravery free-falling around him under the words “I should have let the English kill you,” spat at him for being soft and vulnerable. I see him lose himself in suicidal patterns, familiar. I feel unlovable, and I hear Ed echo my thoughts. I see him come back from the ledge, healing slowly. I see budding happiness. I see love and self-acceptance. I see the crew experiencing so much queer joy it makes my heart ache. I see the fandom experiencing queer joy around me, too. I experience unbridled queer joy for the first time in my life.

I start reading fanfiction again (a door I kept firmly shut and locked for a decade). I want more, to chase the high of queer joy as I read Ed and Stede finding each other and falling in love again and again, in a million different universes. I deepen my connections. I’m finding my foothold again. I form tentative friendships with other people in the fandom. We excitedly post about the season 3 renewal announcement we’re certain is coming. We laugh. We count down the hours together every day for the first week and a half of 2024. A shared delusion, maybe, but all signs were pointing north, and we were traveling there together. I stand up a little straighter. I feel less afraid of being vulnerable. I feel a little bit more lovable.

I let myself hope. I get excited, confident. I talk about the show and the impending renewal announcement with my own mouth and teeth and breath to anyone who will listen. I push the words out with my tongue as the walls around my heart are reduced to rubble against my ribcage. My heart beats defiantly for the whole world to hear.

We know what happens next. I’m free-falling again. It’s silly, right? I wrote all this out to help myself process my emotions, why the cancellation hit me like a wrecking ball, and I feel sillier for it. I feel silly for my heart being so large, for feeling things too much. I feel silly for letting my guard down and letting myself get hurt. For loving things too hard with no plan of how to let go. After a lifetime of this, I should know better.

This show doesn’t define who I am; I already had a pretty firm grasp on that before I ever hit play on the pilot. It’s not life or death. But it helped me find my tender heart again, the me from 10 years ago, the fearless one. It made me fearless again. It made me love again. And at the end of the day, season 3 or no, that means the most to me, and I am endlessly thankful for this heartbreak.

If we’ve never talked before, hi, I’m Danny. Thanks for reading this. I love y’all, crazy little gay people in my phone. I will keep talking about OFMD until the day I die. Hold my hand, let’s be fearless together.

[coyotestarcraft]

Hi can u pls write a crowley fic where he is absoleutly in love with reader who is an angel and while he is confessing like he did in the show the reader just stops and kisses him just like he did. If u r comfortable with it it can be like a fluufy smut

Hav a lovely day

Yes I can! You have a lovely day too dude/dudette (no matter boy, girl, nonbinary or trans, or whatever other gender is out there, I call everyone dude, just a fyi)

This takes place in season 1 when the world was ending just a fyi

Please clarify if you want female/male or gender neutral reader when requesting please. (This goes for everyone) 🙂

Reader is gender neutral to keep it fair.

Requests: Currently On Hiatus (I’m just finishing the ones in my inbox for now)

🚫MINORS DNI🚫

————————————

You’ve known Aziraphale since the early years of when Earth was created.

Now that it was ending you needed to find him to confess how you felt.

“Aziraphale!” You called out but got no response back, that made you worry, but you saw a familiar redhead sitting in his chair.

“Where’s Azira?” You asked him, he shrugged, the smell of alcohol lingering in the air.

“Don’t know, don’t care. That idiot left and I didn’t do anything about it.” He groaned.

“Well do you have an idea where he might’ve went?” You dramatically threw arms out, “probably to find you, I don’t know!” He snapped.

“Fine.” You huffed, walking outside to quickly run as fast you can towards your apartment.

As you burst in you gasped in horror, Aziraphale was pinned against the wall by Michael who was holding a knife.

“Let him go!” You snarled, you went to take a step but another force stopped you, your head turns to see Sandalphon holding you back with one hand, his tight grip makes your wrist start to turn white.

“Let. Me. Go. NOW!” You shove him as hard as possible, knocking him off his feet.

You moved so fast no one, not even Aziraphale saw you grab Michael by the throat and yank them off Aziraphale.

You tone dropped to deadly level.

“Leave now, or I will rip every bone from your celestial body bit by bit until you drown in your own celestial blood.” If looks could kill, Michael would’ve been dead long ago.

They nod frantically as they pulled Sandalphon to his feet quickly miracling themselves to heaven.

“Are you okay?” You asked when you stepped up to Aziraphale.

��Yes dear, I’m fine, a little shaken up but fine.” He smiles, you gently cup his face to inspect for scratches or cuts, but nothing caught your eye.

You soon realized how close your faces were, out of embarrassment you quickly let go and backed up.

“Darling?” Aziraphale.

“Sorry, I didn’t-“ you get off when Aziraphale takes your hand in his, gently stroking your knuckles with his thumb.

“It’s alright my dear, I liked it. And to be honest I like you too, I always have since I met you 6,000 years ago.” He smiles.

“That’s a relief because I’ve been pining for you since we met.” A single tear runs down your face, the angel wipes it away while staring lovingly into your eyes.

“May I?” He asks, taking a glance at your lips.

“Please,” breathlessly you nod.

He cradles your face in his strong but incredibly gentle hands, his lips slot perfectly against yours as you two kiss one another for a moment before pulling away, panting slightly.

“That was lovely.” Aziraphale said after a moment of silence.

“Yeah, now I really love kissing.” You say but Azira feels you want to say more.

“So, does this make us a couple?” You ask.

“I suppose so, but it’s whatever makes you comfortable my love.” He replied.

“So we can cuddle and do all the things couples do?” You ask, a hopeful smile crosses your face, your question gets answered with a peck to your cheek.

“Yes.” He chuckles.

Suddenly your apartment door opens revealing Crowley.

“FINALLY!” He yells as happily as he can manage given he’s a demon.

“Thank you Crowley.” You laugh at the demons antics.

———————————————

Thank you for reading!

[smolbeanie1221]

Being aroace spec can be so confusing

My first relationship was with a girl, and I kinda just went along with what she wanted to do bc I figured, well she’s enjoying it so I must be enjoying this too… I didn’t mind anything we did, I just didn’t care or think about it.

Second relationship was with a guy, and at this point my mom had made me feel incredibly guilty for having been with a girl before, joys of being afab in a religious family and the first person you date is a girl. And he was… definitely pushy. Again tho, I just went along with it bc I figured, well he wants to do this and I just have to be bi so there’s a chance I’ll be a normal girl and end up with a guy someday so I have to be enjoying this too… Yeah I definitely was feeling a lot of pressure there.

At this point, I had not felt actual sexual attraction towards anyone, and I don’t think I was ever romantically in love with either of those people.

Third relationship was with a guy who was also one of my best friends. We were kinda dating for a summer and it was a better relationship than the previous, but in the end we went back to just being friends and it was better that way.

At this point, I’m very confused, but I discover this wonderful thing called ASEXUALITY. And everything suddenly made sense. Except for one small thing.

Fourth relationship that never actually became a relationship. I was in some type of love with a different best friend, I would say demi/sapio-romantic (romantically attracted because of both an emotional and mind connection basically). But he was definitely aromantic, but allosexual. I was romantically attracted to him, but asexual… right??? For years I was confused because I wanted an actual official relationship and I would’ve been more than okay with sleeping with him. But… that can’t be sexual attraction?? I’m ace?? Right?? Ahhhhhh. Yeah so I was very confused around him. Turns out, I’m actually demi-ace, but I didn’t realize that until years later after I lost contact with him, and I’ve been too scared to reach out to him lol. Anyways I have a gf now anyways. And that’s been the only time that the demi part of my ace-ness has come out, pun intended lol.

Actual fourth relationship. Definitely romantic and completely non-sexual. Really good relationship for over a year, and that partner helped me become more comfortable with my gender identity and we both were ace and it was really good for a while. It just wasn’t a relationship that was built to grow, so eventually we drifted apart.

Fifth relationship. A non-romantic and non-sexual relationship. Lasted less than a year, but made me realize that I was also aro spec bc being in a relationship that did not have romantic or sexual expectations felt so comfortable and right.

Sixth relationship. The one that broke my heart. My other best friend in that time frame, we were incredibly close and bonded over everything, from our mental health struggles to books to sheetz runs to everything. Eventually we officially were boyfriends in a qpr. They were my number one person for so long, my life partner. There was never anything romantic or sexual, but we loved each other deeply. Until life happened and they changed and I had to break up with them and got my heart broken.

All of these took place from late middle school to early college by the way. I went from, oh I’m a girl and I like girls! To, shit I can’t like girls so I have to like boys too bc I have to be bisexual at least. To, ohhhh so I can actually not want to sleep with people and that’s normal too?? So I’m nonbinary and asexual? That makes sense. To, why why if I’m ace would I be more than okay sleeping with him??? To, huh i think I’m aro spec too. To, okay I’m definitely aro spec, probably demi-aro technically and… probably demi-ace too? Yeah that’s probably right.

At the same time, I didn’t feel as tho romantic was necessarily the right word for me. I mean I’ve experienced romantic attraction I think, but it usually felt kinda forced by either my partner’s expectations or by society’s expectations. I think that’s why my non-romantic non-sexual relationships felt so comfortable to me, bc there wasn’t any of that expectation. I have no freaking idea what romantic attraction really feels like to me. I’ve experienced it I think (??), but for several reasons including outside expectations and general-emotional-processing-issues at those times, I have a hard time knowing any emotions I was feeling at that time in my life. The “butterflies” and “spacey eyed” and “gooey lovey” feelings I felt could’ve been romantic, sure. But they could’ve also been someone who was heavily emotionally repressed all their life just being happy to have someone that they loved who loved them back and getting excited over how cute they were and enjoying their rambles and just generally being happy with someone and also liking some physical contact like hugs and cuddles bc physical touch is their love language with everyone and they like hugs with everyone they care about, and it wasn’t necessarily romantic…..

I get a similar feeling to “butterflies” when I’m nervous about something or excited to see someone in my family I haven’t seen for a while bc I love them and am excited and happy. Not necessarily a “romantic indicator”. I get “spacey eyed” all the time, and usually it’s bc I’m obsessing over my latest fanfic idea. Again, not a “romantic indicator”. I get “gooey lovey” feelings when I see an adorable animal, when someone in my family or close friend group does something really sweet for me or I’m really happy to see them or I get a hug from anyone I love. Once again, not a “romantic indicator”.

Because of all this, I have settled on alterous as my general term for the type of attraction I have with people I have or wanted to date. Alterous to me means this: “I want to be with you and talk with you and do everything with you, I just don’t care how it looks for us or how we categorize ourselves.” I would also attach romance-inclined or sex-inclined as a prefix type thing when applicable. Fourth relationship that never actually happened? Sex and romance-inclined alterous. Fourth actual relationship? Romance-inclined alterous. This doesn’t actually mean that I will feel romantic or sexual attraction or interest or desire with someone, but I may be inclined to want aspects of that type of relationship and I might have those actual feelings from time to time.

The partner that I have now, seventh relationship for those counting lol. This relationship feels stronger and better than any that I’ve had in the past. There’s no pressure or expectation about sex, and she knows that I’m on the aro spectrum, so there’s no romantic pressure either. At the same time, I love the romantic type aspects we have, but I can’t with any certainty say that my feelings are romantic, or at least not romantic all the time. But I feel about her differently than I have about anyone else. There’s several possible reasons, but one main thing I think is that I’m now in a healthier place emotionally so I can better feel and process all my emotions, including my feelings towards her.

Anyways, at this point I would say I’m aroace spec. Demi-altrose (alterous, romantic, sexual).

[unknownarmageddon]

Tell me your story when you discovered you were trans if you don't mind

oh hell fucking yeah i’ve been waiting for this question

okay story time

basically when i was way young i played an online game called animal jam play wild right

and like. i’d make all my avatars without eyelashes or flower crowns or pinks. “girly things”. and i also always roleplayed male characters, and my username was based off a male book character. which all made everyone i ever really met assume i was a guy.

so i just got referred to as a dude ALL the time like. constantly. that’s just what people assumed i was. and i even, as this kept happening, thought that if i called myself a girl online and was called one online it wouldn’t feel right. like i have vivid memories of saying to myself “if someone called me she online that’d feel weird” because i had been introduced to the notion of regularly being called a dude by people. i had NO idea what this meant and didn’t look into it at all it was just like. that’s that LMAO

i guess it was because like. on animal jam i really got to experience being more of myself??? i guess??? like in terms of expression. cause i made all these fun avatars that i loved and felt so connected to and that people referred to me as a guy because of. that was my first real experience with something like that, being called something other than she because of something i controlled. or something

and kinda as time went on and as i learned a bit more about the lgbtq community and saw other people doing it i decided to make a like. painting thing that stated my pronouns

so for a really good while i went by he/they pronouns on animal jam. never even questioned it. never considered it meant something. i never even called myself trans, never even called myself a guy. because i hadn’t had that realization yet. but that’s just what felt right to me

and even when i decided to go by those pronouns i had this whole thing where i was worried i would be like. lying about my gender???? which is WILD to me now. like i was like “if i went by he would i be lying about my gender?” because i didn’t really. know anything

and i also have this like. faint memory of one of my aj friends asking me what the pronouns change was about cause i had told them prior that i was girl. (which i only did because i thought it was funny seeing people get shocked by that, not because i actually thought i was. idk it was complicated) and i remember preparing the response of “im trans” but i crashed and they left before i ever got to say that. so i guess that was the first ever acknowledgment of being trans. BUT i never actually identified as trans for a good while

while i was playing animal jam and using those pronouns i was also watching a lot of squaishy quack’s videos. and i heard them talk about using they/them pronouns, and being genderfluid. that was the first real introduction i got to titles, words, for something like i might’ve had going on. and since i didn’t really have a grasp on what specifically was going on with me i thought “oh maybe that’s me.” so for a while i identified as genderfluid. but it felt like. forced. like i was trying to make myself that. so then i switched to nonbinary. because for some reason i never considered that it’d be as simple as trans. so i went with nonbinary for a WHILE but it still didn’t feel right. they/them didn’t feel right

so. last year. i was in the car with my father and i was watching the rain go down the window and i just had this batshit epiphany out of basically nowhere like. “holy shit. i’m trans. i’m a guy” like i was finally putting two and two together

and that’s. basically it CACKLES (there was a lot more thought than that but. essentially. that’s what it was)

and. yeah. it’s been that since

if i hadn’t played animal jam i doubt i would’ve realized by now

[theoldlesbianwithcats]

do you have advice on how to stop being bitter over not having a gf? I’ve tried dating apps but they’re really bad. Especially with the queer shit lately, it’s all been a mess. I’ve become very frustrated and bitter over being single. I had a “situationship” fail, she didn’t want to do online dating and frankly she ended up being borderline toxic anyway but I still wish things could’ve worked out for us. Especially since finding a gf has been really difficult for me. Ppl my age mid 20s are super immature and nonbinary or yk other stuff. I know I’m going to be single for a while (realistically speaking, none of this “you could meet your soulmate tomorrow” b.s.) I come from a homophobic af family so I had a lot of internalized homophobia I’ve struggled w and honestly staying single w no other gay ppl in general to talk this out with has been making me go back into those dark days.

Hi anon :D

I've been single for a long time as well, so we're in the same boat! I feel like finding a woman to date in your early 20s was also difficult before all the queer/nb nonsense, for most of college my only prospects were bicurious women who wanted to hookup with me to experiment. I was happy to finally enter my 30s so most of these women would be married and stop annoying me, but with the return of political lesbianism they're in all age groups now 🙃 Then in your 40s, 50s and beyond, you have to avoid the "late bloomer lesbians" (= confused bi women with a midlife crisis)! Is there even a time when it's fun for us to date?? I'm not sure.

It's important to remember that being single for a long time doesn't say anything about us, that doesn't mean that we're unlovable or failures. Plenty of good people (even among straight people!) struggle to date and hate dating apps. It's normal to be bitter about all the things you're missing because you're single (hanging out with another lesbian everyday, sharing good moments, support, physical affection, sex) but instead you could try gratitude exercises like listing advantages of being single (more free time, more time for friends and hobbies, you can decorate and organize your place the way you want it...) Beyond internalized lesbophobia, you can use that time to solve any insecurities, emotional baggage or trauma you might have that could cause problems in a future relationship.

Also I've said this already but I really want to insist: when society (and now the lgbtqiabcxyz+++) wants us to be miserable, lonely, and ashamed, we need to go out of our way to be self-indulgent and spend our time doing things that make us happy and fulfilled. You have a lot of free time, so instead of wallowing and doomscrolling, ask yourself: what can I do to make today a great day? Is it working out, calling/meeting with a friend, doing something creative, learning a new skill, finally finishing a video game, cooking a recipe you've always wanted to try? Even relaxing at the park for an hour or two without your phone so you're not sollicited at all can make you feel better! Don't wait until you have a girlfriend to live a happy life! :)

(... Also, if that's not done already, buy yourself a vibrator. You'll feel less miserable about being single if you can give yourself really good orgasms whenever you want haha)

[gendercriminals]

So. I’ve been trying to find a way to word this post for awhile, but it’s never turned out quite right; so I’m just gonna slam it down and hope for the best. (Which isn’t saying much. This is the “piss on the poor” website.)

While I understand as a community how it might feel like a gotcha to appeal to transphobes through relatability, and pointing out the way that anti-trans bills/laws/regulations will hurt cis people as well… I just really wish that we didn’t have to do that, and that it was a less common talking point.

See. Transphobes know. They’re not saying the quiet part out loud, but they know. That’s their intent. They don’t want to stop at just trans and purposely gnc people. They want everyone with any sort of gender variance they don’t like, inherent to their physical body or not (intersex people and people of color with non-traditionally-cis-european-white features come to mind for the former), to disappear forever.

They want anyone who doesn’t fit into their view of (euro-centric) gender and agab normality to be hidden, “fixed”, silenced, and/or killed. They want us out of the public eye, so anything done to us isn’t as noticeable.

Trans, nonbinary, and gnc people are the main targets in this moment, and everyone else caught in the crossfire are just necessary sacrifices for the sake of “normality ” in their eyes.

[pagerspages]

Professionalism and Neurodiversity

I’ve been working since I was 15 years old. I worked a summer job at a cherry processing factory the summer between my sophomore and junior years, the summer between my junior and senior years, and the summer after I graduated high school. I went straight from working at the factory to my first full-time job working at a gas station. I worked at the gas station for four years. I then moved to a big box retail store working in their automotive department doing oil changes and tire work. I worked then as a service writer/adviser at the same shop, and then I moved inside the store to work as a sales associate.  

All of these times I have had ‘problems’ with my brain. I had severe anxiety when I first started working at the gas station. I almost quit a week into it because working with money stressed me out. I also got a talking to from my boss for not being personable with the customers and at least greeting them. The customers really didn't want to talk to me either but that's neither here nor there. I did not know the extent of my Neurodiversity until way after this. 

I thought it would be just a silly funny thing to do if I took the RAADs Autism assessment. (I will at no time during this post claim I have autism because I have not been officially diagnosed.) This funny silly little thing to do really sent me down a rabbit hole when I scored 140. To put that in perspective no Neurotypical would score above a 64. I’ve shared this with friends and they haven’t been very surprised? I guess I haven’t always masked as well as I thought I have.

Anyways working while being Neurodivergent sucks. I consider myself lucky because I can work. I even enjoy working sometimes. Other times I just need to leave and I can’t. There have been times where I’ve literally had to tell a customer on the phone to hold so I could just close my eyes and ears and block out all the noises. The phone is right next to the window out to the shop as well as the register. There are times where my coworkers are ringing someone up and talking to them, the techs are making loud noises and there’s an announcement going on the PA system all while the customer is trying to get me to give them a price on tires and I just can’t fucking handle it. 

I am a people pleaser. I don’t like to tell people no. I think this has a lot to do with my anxiety thinking that people won’t like me anymore if I tell them no and I’m no longer useful to them. I think it’s also become part of my mask. My mask is this really helpful guy that knows what he’s talking about, does his job well and will help others do their job and whatever is asked of them with minimal complaining. And yes I see my mask as a male even though I now consider myself nonbinary, idk why. 

I’ve been asked before what career I want. No one likes it when I say I don’t want one. Like literally my only big goal in life is to be happy. I stupidly said this during a job interview once and unsurprisingly didn’t get the job. I don’t want my whole life to revolve around trying to get a better and better job and unfortunately for me in this stupid ass economy that really doesn’t work.  

I’m not sure what this post was supposed to be tbh. Maybe I just want to rant. Maybe I want someone to find this and read it and relate to it so we both know that we aren’t alone in how we feel. Maybe I just want validation from strangers on the internet. Who knows why I do anything at this point. I sure as hell don’t. 

[mur-art]

I swear I’m working on other requests but I definitely went a bit too hard on this one. @aarcanaa​

This is getting out of WTTT and into my own OC territory but I hope y’all don’t hate me too much. I intended to add L.A. too but TBH I don’t think I’ve spent enough time in L.A. to feel confident with a design right now. Also I personally have a lot of negative feelings toward L.A. so it may be a bit unfairly biased. 

Anyway, some notes about my interpretations (and a sketch of San Diego v.2) below: 

Fun fact; I live in a super rural part of California literal hours away from the nearest major city (which is actually Las Vegas, Nevada) so my experience of being a Californian is a bit uh... different. Cities terrify me a bit (see my notes on L.A. above) but I’ve been to most of the CA cities at least once. Out of all of them, I’ve actually spent the most time in San Diego. 

Anyway, enough rambling; here’s some notes about them. Keep in mind, these are just my interpretations based on my own experiences. 

San Francisco: 

-Nonbinary; uses they/them pronouns. (I can’t get the idea of them saying “My name is San FranCISco but I’m anything but” out of my head.) 

-Has a lot of super artsy and well-executed tattoos (pretend I can draw them correctly!) Most of them are exactly what you’d expect, but some of them are truly bizarre. Many of them cover burn scars. 

-Apparently SF’s official city flower is the dahlia, so they’re wearing a vague approximation of a dahlia. 

-Has a semi one-sided rivalry with L.A. (L.A. is too busy with her own shit to care as much) I think this somewhat originally stemmed from the jealousy of L.A. overtaking San Francisco as the largest city in CA, but it continues because of their clashing personalities.

-Is rich AF but attempts to dress and act like they’re not. Wouldn’t want to be like L.A.; that’s what they’ll say. But they will 100% humblebrag about their latest expensive gadget purchase whenever given the opportunity. 

-Leans 110% into every single thing they do; they are seemingly incapable of half-assing something. This is their boom town mindset in action- first it was gold, now it’s tech. They are a MASSIVE overachiever, and this leads to them always being stressed-while-pretending-not-to-be-stressed. 

-Acts kind of spoiled and haughty and can be a judgmental asshole sometimes, but despite this, they actually do care about people. When shit hits the fan, they’re the first one to lend a hand. Maybe it comes from coming close to dying multiple times (in the way that personifications can actually die, not just silly accidents) that gives them a deep sense of empathy and awareness of their own mortality. This leads them to champion causes that seek to make the world a better place. They’re not perfect and sometimes things backfire, but they do try. 

San Diego: 

-Cis female; she/her. 

-Canonically (at least in WTTT) California’s favorite city. She knows this and tries to work him to her advantage to get what she wants. 

-She’s basically sunshine personified. She’s super bubbly, outgoing, and generally friendly. Unlike the other California cities, she is actually genuinely laid-back and relatively stress-free. 

-She’s very book smart, especially with numbers and engineering-related things, but she often acts outwardly ditzy and carefree, leading some people to doubt her intelligence. However, when she gets to work she can prove herself immediately. 

-Historically, she was overshadowed by the other cities. At times, they even forget she existed, despite her trying her best to make herself stand out. I found this great quote from a 1920s businessman: 

“What is the matter with San Diego? Why is it not the metropolis and seaport that its geographical and other unique advantages entitle it to be? Why does San Diego always just miss the train, somehow?"

-Despite being perpetually overshadowed and ignored, or maybe because of it, she forged her own identity. She didn’t feel like she had to uphold any rigid standards like the others did, so she became much more chill. 

-She can be very flaky; don’t try to make plans with her, she’ll either forget or get distracted by something else. If you want to hang out with her, you just have to go with her flow. 

-She can speak Spanish fluently and is best friends with TJ (Tijuana). 

-She’s super fit and could beat you up, but she won’t. 

-San Diego is well-known for having a large military presence, so I had to include San Diego in her day job attire. (Ssh, pretend I know about military stuff and got her uniform accurate) She can go from hippie mode to drill sergeant mode in an instant, but only when someone has really fucked up. 

Anyway, thanks for sticking with me! 

[imjustabeanie]

Hey there! It’s Morgan (@whiskersz) here for the matchup trade! First of all, I’m very happy that you came to me for a trade, I didn’t even know these were a thing before seeing your work!

Some basic info – I’m 20, use he/they pronouns, I’m Bisexual and Nonbinary and I have no preference for the gender of who I’m gonna be matched with :) I'm also Italian!!

So, I guess I should start by saying that I’m quite the introvert. I find it very difficult to start a conversation with people I don’t know and even when we’re already acquainted it takes me a while to open up fully. I’ve been called scary before, which happened also because I naturally look a bit annoyed all the time and apparently I don’t laugh at many things.

Once I open up though, I’m very silly! Literally the definition of ‘just a guy’; I like cats, drawing, painting, watching series and playing videogames and shipping myself and my OCs with my favorite characters, and writing about cute scenarios; I also love shopping and ‘dressing to impress’, I never leave the house with a random outfit, I dress in hopes that somebody in the streets will look at me and think that my style is awesome. So, I would say I kind of like attention in a way. Speaking of my style I always dress like I’m straight from the past, I own stuff that used to belong to people who bought it in the 80s, but even earlier! I also really love anything vintage and I’m somewhat of a maximalist, my desk is a mess of trinkets, action figures and jewellery.

As for what I dislike, I really hate gory scenarios, I can’t stand seeing that kind of thing at all and I actually pass out a lot from just hearing the description of such things. I also generally dislike annoying noises such as loud chewing, and people who don’t respect my boundaries. If somebody is like that, I’m not afraid of telling them that they’re getting on my nerves, though if we’re close I’ll be way kinder to them as I tolerate stuff from my loved ones way easier.

It’s maybe unexpected, but in a relationship I’m very loving and caring and I will worry about anything and everything, I’m also very empathetic so if my partner is feeling down I’ll unfortunately feel down as well, but I’m very willing to ignore my feelings since I’m just basically mirroring what they feel as I would rather be supportive and positive in times of need. My love languages are a mess, I basically express my love through words, actions, gifts and expressing that I want to spend time with each other all together; the last one is a bit more special maybe since I rarely feel up to doing things with people in general.

I don’t want to make this too long, so here’s my deal breakers and then we’re done! I’m not a fan of clinginess, I care about my loved ones a lot but I need a lot of space to practice my hobbies and to do my thing in general. I also dislike people who get angry easily, I’m a very chill person so I’d rather be surrounded by equally chill people. For the rest, just be loyal and honest and then we’re chill!

Hope this is all good! Take your time with this and happy writing :3

I nearly answered the wrong ask lmao. So sorry for the wait I hope you like it!

Your hazbin Hotel match is.....Vox!

For husker:

Don’t judge or blame me….your match is…Vox! I was surprised too since I initially hesitated between Husk and Vaggie….and somehow ended up with Vox.

Vox is a passionate man (demon?) to say the least. You did say that it’s difficult for you to start conversations in general so he’ll be the one starting them (and he likes it). What’s annoying with Vox is that it takes a little something special (his own interest) for him to start considering the person if you know what I mean. That’s why my scenario here is that you were a friend of someone in the Hotel (it can be anyone). Vox is interested in the hotel so he socialized with you to get inside infos. When he realized he actually started enjoying your company he acted like a schoolgirl and completely isolated himself because well it’s the first time! After the V’s saw him in that miserable state of mind they finally decided to confront him. It was effective cuz he confessed a week later.

Vox, as the other V’s, sometimes doesn’t respect boundaries (but not as much as the other two) by wrapping his arm around your shoulder or waist without asking first. But once you put him in his place he’ll accept it and then apologize by treating you to a nice date (plus a bouquet of flowers ofc). Something that’s nice is that he does take criticism (unless it’s from Alastor) but he’s too prideful to apologize properly by words. Instead he’ll take a step back and think about his actions so he won’t repeat the same mistakes.

He loves how good you dress up. He also dress to impress and likes someone that’s like him. He commissions new outfits for you almost weekly and always goes all out (velvet helps with the choices and coordination)! You’re the couple that everyone wants to dress up like if it helps. He relishes in the envious looks people give you both, it’s obvious from the big grin on his face (if you let him, he’ll kiss you and basically give the middle finger to everyone watching). Getting matching jewels is a must. I also see him as a watch type of guy so if you get him one he will wear it all the time. When in public, he speaks first and always starts the conversation so you don’t get awkward. If he feels you getting shy he’ll take over.

Vox is basically vintage himself. I can completely see him collecting stuff from all time periods (beside radios) His house is basically an organized hoarder house. Which means he has strings to bring you some very good and rare stuff. Each month he makes it his personal quest to bring you a box of a few rare items. He also brings with him vinyl for you two. After a long day he enjoys listening to music over a nice diner with you. Then he takes your hand and dances around the kitchen/living room. When he comes back home to you, he gets softer/more honest. He tells you about his ups and downs. He takes your opinion very seriously too.

I believe he is too date with all new series/movies (to be expected since he’s in the entertainment industry). That’s why you can always count on him for good recommendations. But if you introduced him to human world series/movies he’d welcome it! This means that you two always write a recommendation list to the other and it makes up for many common topics!

He sucks at video games. He’s too impatient and loves the fast types of games. He does try to have a healthy competition I promise but he gets all sulky when he loses lol. He’d like to get into more time consuming games but he doesn’t have much time (he did get the idea that it’d be good to get into the game industry to bring/brainwash more demons….). He gets jealous easily and it’s not uncommon to find him criticizing every character you matched yourself with. Oh boy I can’t imagine if it’s an actor….poor actor getting glared at will be so confused.

He enjoys your drawings! He gifts you with the supplies since he knows you like drawing as a mean to encourage you. If you actually started a career he’d back you up. If Vox finances animated series he’d give you a shot of actually present your characters to the artist for inspiration. He’s genuinely proud of you for that. He does criticize to help you out of course and if he doesn’t like it he’ll tell you why. Now for cats…I love cats but I don’t see him as an animal person. He won’t stop you from getting a cat but will get jealous if the kitty gets too much attention. Ironically cats love him….He likes that you support him all the time despite his obvious evil ways. We can say that love is keeping you two together.

Now for some bad parts….It happens that Vox gets all worked up (when a certain someone is involved). It’s very rare that he blows up on you due to stress but it happened once or twice (the reason you’re nearby is that he usually hugs you to calm down). He was fully apologetic afterward and even expected you to break up with him for it. Also he has an unhealthy rivalry with Alastor so yeah….

Tada!

[bunnysdaydreams]

Shimada Brothers & Kiriko reacting to reader coming out as Nonbinary

I haven’t really seen much of these three with a nonbinary person before and I had an idea…so yeah hope you enjoy 😊 I am putting genders just to explain what these three thought of you as well

Hanzo Shimada

“You’re nonbinary?”

At first he’s surprised

He’s always used female/male pronouns with you and not once has he been corrected

He struggles with changing pronouns at first and makes some mistakes here and there

But he slowly becomes better

“This is my friend and their name is”

When someone deliberately calls you female/male Hanzo shows up and with an unforgiving voice tells them off

“They are nonbinary and I suggest you leave them alone” he gets closer to them and whispers something in the their ear

They bolt off like a coward with their tail between their legs

You simply roll yours eyes and rest your hand on his shoulder

“I could’ve handled them, but thank you Hanzo”

Genji Shimada

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I hope I didn’t offend you”

Like his brother he is also surprised

But is quick to using gender neutral pronouns

“They’re an amazing person, you’d like them Master”

He’d definitely take you to meet Zenyatta and introduce you to him

And just like Hanzo, Genji will put anyone down who says something they shouldn’t

“They are my friend. They do not need to listen to you. So leave them alone”

You never have to worry about Genji actually hurting the person

Because Genji will flat out lie and say he didn’t do anything

“Don’t worry I handled them, they won’t hurt you again”

He slings his arm over your shoulder and brings you to a claw machine to get your mind off of the person

Kiriko Kamori

“I’ve had a nonbinary friend this whole time!”

She’s super happy that you told her something as personal as this

She even gives you nicknames that can be used for any gender

Muffin/Pumpkin/Foxy/etc.

She doesn’t struggle with the pronoun changes either, because her fox spirit is nonbinary as well

(That’s my head cannon for Kiriko’s fox)

When comes down to someone teasing you about being nonbinary Kiriko pulls no punches

“Hey leave them alone, before I make you. They want to do nothing with the likes of you”

Also she would definitely let her fox come out every once in a while and hang out with you

Until she finds out that her fox likes you over her because of the treats you give them

[clickpen]

hi i’m gonna post rambles about a book series nobody knows maybe. i came across it while reading an anthology called fell beasts and fair. idk if anyone will read this and i don’t care but i need to get out something in my brain. i have a degree in fiction writing or something idk

i don’t think anything’s really inspired me to sit down and think about stuff like this in a while but i read a book of queer essays before the anthology (queer reflections on horror) and i guess ive been in “alternate analysis” mode

but anyways when it comes to fae there’s always something to be said about neurodivergancy 

i think, as a nonbinary autistic person, there’s something distinctly fascinating about the city between series and pet. i'd initially gone "omg this must be some it/its nonbinary child" (the anthology short story is narrated by a leprechaun who doesn’t know pet’s gender and constantly thinks of “it” though there’s actually a typo that calls pet “she” in narration once that i noticed because i was laser focused)  bc there was only one use of pronouns and it seemed to be corrected back to it/its. like, i thought pet was an it/its human that happened to be correctly gendered bc the leprechaun didn’t apply a gender to her

and then i still didn't quite get it until a good way into the first book that pet was probably a she/her because athelas called her she mistakenly. as far as i recall, pet never calls herself a girl. 

even tho ive only read one short story and the first book so far (gonna read more once i’m paid for freelance stuff,) i’ve felt like there’s a strong lack of an Image of pet. like yeah she’s narrating but also she carries the story and her weight based on her personality, voice, and narration, it feels a lot like you’re looking into the world through this narrator. she doesn’t really seem to react much to being called it besides mild annoyance at the confusion rhe first time, mostly it's annoying that they keep trying to pretend they don't like her

but like (within the context of the first book n stuff) pet is talked about so little and has existed by her/itself for so long, unnoticed and hidden, that it feels like she/it truly lacks a personhood and has for a Long Time. like it’s already noted that nobody knew she existed. she may well not exist, but of course she does, she’s got such a hyperactive and involved personality and is brave and kind.

and only the people who seem to recognize that about her actually seem to talk to her as a Person. even though she’s ostensibly dehumanized by fae that are detached from the concept of humanity, they also award her more humanity and recognize her individuality and personality more than anyone has in SO long, bc she’s been hiding and not really interacting with people outside of work. 

there’s some trans metaphor i can see in there, that’s all i’m saying, but also something about adhd + autism and masking

i feel like she/it isn’t too bothered by going by pet because she hasn’t really gone by a name besides “you” for so long and just no longer has interest in pretty much anything human of that sort. she also takes quickly (and in a somewhat silly way) to this “role” because she’s not really been given a role in so long. i don’t think pet knows how to be a person or human, and doesn’t CARE to understand a right or wrong way of doing anything, she just is and only begins to exist around the freak squad. (i keep thinking of her as it/they)

i feel like i could write a whole thing about the comparisons between neurodivergant (ESPECIALLY autistic) people and fae, and the idea of autistic people forcing themselves to mask and pretend. and then also how trans people often have to hide who we are and only be ourselves in private, or how sometimes there’s a uniquely isolating experience about being trans and nonbinary and feeling disconnected from other people, even other trans people sometimes, because it’s hard to be Seen when you’re nonbinary

anyways pet is autistic and nonbinary (she/it/they/maybe just doesn’t care) and i’d hazard a guess at bi and/or ace if i wanna keep pushing the disconnect from others angle.