#i didn’t read this before posting

[m4ndysk4nkovich]

i will never not feel so bad for ian because of how his parents treated him.

as far as we know, ian was the only one who was physically abused by frank throughout his childhood. frank hated ian the most because he “looked the most like his mother” (and the most like frank’s brother, clayton, ian’s actual dad clayton, but nobody actually ever says that) and ian thinking that he looks/acts like monica seriously effects him later on. frank treats him like absolute dog shit, and we hear ian say that when he was six frank locked him in the basement for days. one of the biggest things about shameless is the “cycle of abuse” and frank’s treatment of ian is ironic because from what we know, frank was the only one his parents ever abused (physically, at least).

and for monica, ian was his favorite. i don’t give a shit if fiona says that lip is her favorite, from monica’s first episode’s it’s been apparent that it’s ian. for example- not giving a shit about any of her children’s accomplishments until it comes to ian, and her eyes light up, or making lasagna “ian’s favorite” (it’s not). but being monica’s favorite isn’t actually a good thing. monica seriously abused ian, too, and people don’t always awknolege that. their relationship was built on manipulation, monica’s victim complex, and neglect. she did nothing but use and hurt him, and whether or not she really loved him doesn’t really matter because either way it just hurt him. and the saddest thing is no matter how far away he pushes her, he’s still attached and he still loves her. we don’t know what she truly put him through as a child, but we can assume that it was hell. from ian’s whole speech to her in 7x09 we can tell that he definitely needed her, but she was never there. this is also apparent in fiona’s monologue in 7x12.

also, in season 11 when debbie tells frank, “you ruined love for me!” that definitely also applies to what ian was saying in season 10 about having frank and monica as role models for love. they damaged him so fucking badly and even though he did get a happy ending, he got totally screwed over.

i get that people hate ian for saying that frank was worse than terry in hall of shame, and i made a whole post about that (here!), and although if we’re really thinking about it, yeah, terry was technically worse; ian still went through so much traumatic shit that needs to be taken into account.

[lygma-nygma]

Being a batfam fan is funny because people will make a post like “here’s my headcanon-“ and it’s just something that’s directly canon to the story then post about major canon events and get everything wrong.

[bloobydabloob]

Do you think being aware of the different elements in art or just ordinary objects can make the process of actually making art difficult? I get that it's about balance and unity of it all, but being introduced to so many concepts early on feels like too much. Almost feels like learning to make art digitally for the first time -> introduced to all these neat gadgets but no idea how to use them or where

This is a crazy good point anon & very important. YES I think it makes it exponentially harder

It’s just like everything else though where learning to pick your battles is pertinent - knowledge is a foundational aspect of your beliefs and your art is based on your beliefs regardless of how you frame it. Accruing relevant (and irrelevant tbh) info is always going to help you navigate more complex & unique themes. Obviously not everyone is going to get anywhere with it but I think the whole thing is pretty rewarding it motivates everything I do in my entire life so I think it’s worth it. Definitely doesn’t even just apply in theme as well it sounds like you’re talking here about practical technique too which you’re 100% right about again. I think things that I find helpful to remember are

1 - Identifying a comprehensive goal in my action helps me to slow my roll & stop trying to pull from too many sources at once

2 - On the contrary it’s also good to remember that difficult, arduous & thought provoking task is important to art. It doesn’t have to be important to you but don’t be afraid of it

But the good thing about knowing things is knowing things helps you to know more things and knowing more things helps you to make better decisions. These kinds of worries about art are just smaller picture effigies of bigger problems about growing up, it is hard & it’s exceedingly normal to feel lost especially if you’re young. If art is at its core a representation of the life behind the creator then it’s just that. All things are present even incidentally through every single thing you create, which is also why being informed is important ! If you have something to say about something then then your art will. Your art exclusively exists through the people who view it & their tastes. “What kind of people would you want to discuss your work? Whose admiration would flatter you? What figures do you admire? What occupies most of your thoughts?” Are what I’d consider pretty big standard starting points they might give you on a sheet if you were to ask someone about beginning a series of focused work.

Also the thing about purposeful art compared to direct description (e.g. in this context art discussion) is that visual art exceeds writing in a lot of areas including ease of ambiguity. It really is hard to talk about the place obscurity has in art especially factoring in where people might differ on it. But it’s easy to let its importance bypass you, especially as a figurative artist. It’s also easy to make ambiguity sound like an area of study, when really it is like the antilabel of artistic components, ambiguity is black ! It defines itself as a lack of presence & not as its own entity, which in my opinion makes it a lot easier to approach lol. It finds itself comfortably where you apply nothing else

There are one million things that could be / have been said on this subject. I’m sure you would probably get more solid ideas on how to approach an issue like this from someone who has taken a different approach to art themselves, I’ve never read any book approaching art performing from a seminary perspective just as I’ve never been taught or schooled. I’m still going through the throes of asking myself these same things & I think I will be for my entire life. It’s easy to believe that consensus is a trophy gained for putting enough time into something when the truth is that there is no guaranteed finality to art. Be afraid of stagnancy, not ephemerality. There is a lot to be said even for oblivion in character & impulse, so really just make art regardless. Even if it never gets good at least you were doing something

I think you’re already on the right track if this is something you’re thinking about though if you ask me or at least you’re doing something similar to me lol. The amount of “things there are” is genuinely intimidating & especially as such an uninformed, sheltered person as I am making any real decisions for something as longterm as an artistic identity without any real connections to a qualified community seems impossible. Keep thinking like this & hunting yourself down I like to do everything I can that makes something happen about this. It’s not easy ! I don’t think it needs to be

[hanzajesthanza]

geralt of rivia thoughts summarized

this city is too congested and loud

i don’t like the way my clothes feel

it’s super hot out right now but i’m gonna keep my outerwear on

i’m just gonna sit in the corner and do my thang

what’s wrong with me why do i feel emotions so strongly

people keep telling me i was made wrong

there are so many smells out here right now

i don’t like the way these clothes feel either

i don’t know how to break up with my girlfriend so i’m just going to leave i guess

wrong decision i’m going to apologize now. … by giving her some cool rocks

i kind of messed things up with my girlfriend again but i want to talk to her BUT i don’t know how to address her. we made passionate love many times. can i call her my… hmm… ummm… friend…?

i could piss in this flowerpot but… that wouldn’t be nice to the flowers

it’s time for a scathingly eloquent rant

never mind i forgot how to say words

i’m just going to tell you what happened straight up. no poetics from me

but let’s critique society

I HATE INJUSTICE AND UNFAIRNESS !!!

why are people so corrupt and evil. i don’t get it.

more importantly. WHY do i keep falling for it.

i am a relic of an older time. change is already here and i’m not ready

apart from my immediate family i’ve had one best friend for a decade and that’s my extent of socializing.

unless someone comes to me first with that. and we have shared interests. then we can roll together for a bit

i have not changed my sense of style or the type of clothes i wear since i was eighteen. i even tie my hair in the same way

[trainwrecksys]

Now to draw Miss Peregrine in a pretty pink dress with a wand which I KNOW she’ll love /j

[pixlokita]

I feel like ? I gotta remind people it’s ok to unfollow a blog when it upsets you in any way >> like if I ever do that sure, you can let me know if it was anything I did personally I’d appreciate it but if you just don’t enjoy something it’s ok to unfollow ;w; can’t stress enough how important it is to put your mental health first 👌

[dailyjevil]

hello!! hope you're having a good day :D

since you're doing the pride flag challenge, I hope you don't mind me requesting the lithromantic/sexual flag!

left is lithsexual and the right is lithromantic, idm which one you pick :]

(it means to feel romantic and/or sexual attraction to someone but doesn't want the feeling reciprocated or stops once it is :>)

Day 297 of posting Jevil every day

[weirdlookingsnakewithlegs]

I’ve never heard of the seeker slave trade before. Like damn.

For some good angst tonight, how do they get kidnapped? Do they get jumped by grounders and then wings bound by a transformation clamp (I’m thinking like the one in tfp they used for Starscream) so they’re helpless? I imagine it happens more in other cities due to Vos being a safe haven for them.

I imagine they’d get sky thirst due to not being able to fly unless their owners have a special leash or somethn so they can get some flight time for a short while and not eventually die.

Are they forced to clean houses or some other back breaking labour (cleaning houses is the only thjng I can think of atm 😭)

I’m going to cut off at a certain point because this is going to get pretty dark pretty quick.

Now in the beginning, grounders would visit Vos, befriend a seeker and then turn on them. Now this could happen in multiple ways, it doesn’t really matter how but there are several ways to contain a seeker to begin with, T-cog locks, wing clamps, thruster blocks, ect ect. Luckily, sparklings were rarely ever taken due to the fact they’re usually being watched over by a whole trine at a time or more.

Eventually one of the Winglords, way before Starscream, cut off from the rest of cybertron save for Praxus and Protihex, Praxus due to the fact that seekers are loosely related to praxians and Protihex for their medical academy as at the time that was the only way for many seekers to get medical aid. Then it got worse. Some medics could be paid off to give up seekers under their care. Which yippee that’s definitely not malpractice and fucking illegal. So not only are these seekers being given up injured, they’re also being detained.

Now yes you are correct, it was QUICKLY discovered that seekers go mad when unable to fly. Now every problem always ends up getting a solution, think of shock collars and the invisible barriers. However, another issue is that it was discovered seekers always need to be in pairs, because eventually they wouldn’t be able to fly due to their inability to properly groom and preen.

Now many seekers were considered eye candy, and while yes they did preform chores and commit to errands, many of them were just made to look pretty and be a little doll on the shelf more than half the time.

Now this is where we’re gonna get evil so mind the following trigger warnings: S/A, force marriage, force forging, cage fights, ‘dehumanization’, child labor, suicidal ideation/mentions, stockholm syndrome, self harm

Now, seekers were not considered to be fully functional before the war. Many thought they were more beast than cybertronian and because of this ‘taming’ one was considered a prize. Now you can probably already imagine what that entails and of course it leads to some… very not good relationships and may include things like stockholm syndrome or the eventual collapse into suicide and self harm.

Many of those that owned seekers were politicians, wealthy, or just high up in social status. Of course, not all these people were good and that led to certain events and the eventual coming of seeker-grounder conjunx relationships, which most of these were very much not at all healthy or even remotely romantic in any sense. With this would come with the idea of wanting sparklings and well, now you have answers for some of the seeker hybrids like Skyfire, Blurr, and a few others.

Sometimes though, another seeker or full grounder would be forged instead. An example of one such seeker being forged into this cruel world is Nacelle, who was put to work by the time he could speak basic Cybertronian. Of course his sire was very against him learning anything but Vosian in the early stages of life but that would do no use here and get them both hurt.

Now, along with that, some seekers were thrown into the Pits. Now, fighting for your life, you’re going to fight dirty and as hard as you can— biting, clawing, going for the vitals, anything. This unfortunately caused the increase in people believing seekers were nothing more than feral cybertronians. Some seekers would manage to go up in rank of course and earn some respect.

Now, considering all of this, the slave trade would continue escalating up until about several vorns before the war when Shockwave, yes Senator Shockwave, made his way to Vos along with a few students for the sole purpose of the fact it was reported that many seekers had outlier abilities. This would cause one of Shockwave’s students to become obsessed with seeker culture and eventually that student would conjunx Novastorm, one of the seekers they happened to be studying. This would lead to submitted research and it would eventually be revealed that seekers are on the same level as basic cybertronians, just that they adhere to traditions and have a very different cultural background.

This didn’t stop the trade at all but it did happen to slow it until the war inevitably started and Starscream and flock joined the Decepticon ranks. The trade would then be shattered and the seekers that survived would end up among the flock where they belong.

[driftingballoons]

Some creatures are more difficult to perceive than others

[divorceblogger]

well I did finish the vampire lestat.

[might-be-tiny-gt]

Last year I wrote a story about a streamer who shrinks based on chat donations. I meant it as a one shot, but guys…. GUYSSSSS.

I think about this story ‘s universe a lot. I have lore notes just collecting dust and I need to share it or I might go absolutely mad XD Made these visuals charts to get the basics across but if you’re interested in my lore and semantic ramblings, feel free to read below the cut.

Consider this my unofficial pitch bible for Down Played.

General premise: Monica Diaz is Twitch streamer with steadily growing fan base. Her tag is MiniMushroom and her aesthetic is cottage core. She loves all things magical and tiny, especially toadstool mushrooms, that’s the image most associated with her “brand.” She’s approached by a mysterious benefactor who has developed technology specifically for Monica to test and utilize for her streams. It’s called Byte-Syzed Tech and it connects to a user’s twitch stream and based on the user’s preferences, gives the audience the ability to change the user’s height. The one shot I wrote takes place during Monica’s first live use of Byte-Syzed tech on stream. If I were to develop this into a full story I’d probably go back a bit and start around when Monica is first approached about using Byte-Syzed tech then continue to follow Monica adjusting to using Byte-Syzed more often. How she deals with the size change on camera, off camera, how her social and personal life are affected, all that good stuff. I think it would like a slice of life feel good kinda story.

Characters:

- Monica - Main character and primary user of Byte-Syzed tech. Surprisingly enough, she’s actually a law school grad who probably would have put her degree to use if she didn’t accidentally gain a massive following on twitch. Funny how life works out. She stands at 6’4 and always was fascinated with the idea of being small (Basically, she’s a g/t nerd who doesn’t know what g/t is) so being gifted Byte-Syzed and being able to use it on stream is kinda a dream come true.

- Kim - Monica’s girlfriend, roommate, and stream moderator. Kim and Monica were high school sweethearts but drifted apart in college due to personal matters in Kim’s life including having to drop out of college. Kim and Monica rekindled their relationship a few years later and Kim cites Monica and her encouragement as a big reason why she’s been able to get her life back together. She’s currently back in college working on getting her degree in Mathematics.

- The Twitch Team- Moni hosts solo streams but also very often collabs with three of her online friends. Ariel (@Lifeisthebubbles), a Vtuber who is the only one Moni has met in person. Corey (@McDonuts) an NB asmrist on youtube who started streaming games for fun. And Phin (@UrguyPhin) Corey's bf and the competitive gamer of the four. All three of them were streaming with Monica when she first used Byte-Syzed and have since gotten used to pausing their games so an ever shrinking Monica can adjust her set up.

- The Benefactors- Keeping their (Plural, there are two of them) exact identity to myself for the time being, but basically they’re mad scientists with the best intentions. Their antics have garnered attention across the internet as they have created and gifted inventions to up and coming online creators that seem to defy all laws of physics. Anti Gravity chambers, a literal money tree, a mask the morphs the wearer’s face, and now the Byte-Syzed size changing tech. Despite their inventions going viral, their identities have remained hidden. So what is their deal? They’re just big fans of these creators and for lack of drawing skills have gifted them weird inventions instead. Nerds… Due to the nature of Byte-Syzed and the possible effects it can have on the human body, Monica and Kim remain in close contact with them.

How Byte-Syzed Works in Universe: This I wrote tons of notes about when I first thought of the idea. Byte-Syzed can be divided into three key components; The program, the arm band monitor, and the sync suit.

The Program is installed on the user’s computer and connects directly to the arm band monitor and sync suit. The program has user friendly set up that allows the user to input the direction of height change (Shrink or Grow), The minimum or maximum height change, How height change occurs (By views, chat commands, donations, etc.), and rate of height change (How much height is gained or lost with each instance of viewer interaction.) EX: If height is based on donations, the user can set it up so they lose 1 inch for every 10 dollars donated. They can set the minimum height to 6 inches, so once they’ve received enough donations that they have shrunk down to 6 inches, Byte-Syzed will hold at that height. More donations may come in after, but the height will remain at 6 inches for the duration of the stream.)

The Arm Band Monitor, is the device the physically changes the user’s height after connecting to the Byte-Syzed Program. It also monitors and display’s the user’s current height and vitals. All data collected from the arm band will then be saved and can be referenced later if the band is connected to the computer. The arm band must be kept on at all times during active use and active reset of Byte-Syzed. Active use is the time in which Byte-Syzed is being used in a stream and the user’s height is actively changing. Active reset refers to time after the stream has ended and the user is either set at their new current height or in the process of returning to their normal height. After a stream has ended the user will remain at their changed height until they press the reset button on the monitor. Once the reset button is active, the user will return to their normal height at 1.5 times the amount of time it took to change to their current changed height. EX: A user has finished a stream that was 4 hours. They hit the reset button which will return them to normal over the course of 6 hours. (4x1.5=6) This only applies for time Byte-Syzed was in use, not how long a size change occurred. EX: If the user’s stream was 4 hours, but they reached their minimum height in 3 hours, the reset function will account for the 4 hours the stream lasted. This is a safety procedure to reduce stress on the user’s body. Note: If the reset button is not pressed, the user will remain at their changed height for a period of 12 hours. After 12 hours, the reset function will kick in automatically.

The Synchronized Suit or Sync Suit is directly connected to the Byte-Syzed program and will grow and shrink with the user at the same rate as the user. Normal clothing can be worn above it but they will not change size with the user, only the sync suit. The sync suit Monica received came with the suit, shoes, and a headset with a built in microphone to keep audio input even over the course of her size changing. More sync suits are in the process of being designed and produced, with the goal of making sync suits that resemble everyday clothing like t shirts or skirts.

Fun Story Ideas:

- Origin story. How Monica met the benefactors and was gifted Byte-Syzed, her and Kim’s gripes about using it, actually going through with it and the pros and cons she noticed, the end of her first size changing stream and dealing with being tiny in her own room and her girlfriend’s hands. Etc etc

- Monica finished a late night stream using byte Syzed and forgets to press reset when she goes to sleep so instead of growing back over the course of the night she wakes up at her tiny size. After realizing her mistake she begins the growth process but now has to do it while attempting to do her regular day time activities.

- Monica is approached by a doll company to collaborate on a new doll based on her, only issue, their studio is several hours away and they want her to model at both her full height and at the height of the dolls. After some consideration Monica and Kim decide to take a road trip to the studio and use Byte Syzed at the studio under Kim’s careful supervision. What could go wrong?

- Months have passed and Kim and Monica have grown well adjusted to the major size difference between them after Monica finishes a byte syze stream, however curiosity has gotten the best of her and Kim wonders what it would be like to be the tiny one for a change.

If you have read this far, you have my eternal gratitude. Thanks for reading this far, I really hope you liked it XD Maybe if time and motivation allows I can flesh the story out.

[chimerahyperfix]

You’re looking for something— no, someone, too, aren’t you?

(I can’t comprehend how you understand what’s going on, with your lifeless shell. Craft as you are.)

[xskyll]

Izuku: This poor guy. I must have accidentally tricked him into thinking I’m an interesting person.

Shouto: I think it’s interesting how you’re able to hold a conversation while smacking yourself upside the head.

Izuku: See, this is what I mean. That’s not interesting. Anyone who grew up with Kacchan could hold a conversation while getting hit.

(If it isn’t clear, Izuku is hitting his headset irl to knock the water out.)

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First

[hazelwongspullover]

“you silly girl! i’ve been trying to protect you, but you can never do the right thing”.

the actual audacity for june to say that, when she literally committed a kidnapping scheme and played a part in su li’s murder??

she should have absolutely no say about doing “the right thing”😭

[ssruis]

At some point I really do need to talk about tsukasa + rui wrt to rui - who has had so many people leave him because his ideas were scary/dangerous even when he did everything to ensure people wouldn’t actually get hurt - going “I’m going to be too weird and he’s going to leave me so I should just get it over with now by being as insane as possible. Ok he’s still here what if I’m more insane. Ok he’s still here but surely he’ll leave if I’m even crazier. Ok he’s still here but THIS time (rinse and repeat).” I feel like a lot of why rui acted Like That in the beginning was because he was like “this guy is a liar there’s no way he’ll actually stick around *nobody* is ok with my stunts.” If everyone says you’re weird and your ideas are insane and will hurt people you might as well lean into that being your reputation so that nobody else will attempt to be your friend and then leave when you + your ideas are too much. Obviously a lot of this is unconscious but I think in the beginning it was at least a little deliberate.

He was 100% lying when he was like “if you touch this you’ll die” in the main story but I feel like that was his way of being like “see recruiting me was a bad idea. Oh well this is what I expected”. Which is also why he immediately is like “bye then ✌🏻” when tsukasa is like “I don’t want to die.” & then he’s shocked when tsukasa is like “ok fine let’s do that” -> he suggests a flame thrower and launching tsukasa 10 meters into the air -> tsukasa is still like “😰… but it will wow the audience so as a future star I must do it”

which is 100% the first time anyone has been insane enough to agree to what rui throws at them & he’s very obviously super cheesed by this

The reason I’m singling out tsukasa (besides the fact that I’m a ruikasa enjoyer) is that, unlike with emu/nene, 1) tsukasa promised to match his freak during their first interaction 2) when rui attempted to call his bluff tsukasa continued to be insane and agree to his ideas.

& then when rui “shows and theatre are my entire life and also the only way I know how to connect to people (even though that never works)” kamishiro leaves and refuses to return, Tsukasa elects to convey his true feelings/rediscovery of his original goal through a show based around their argument. Which is an absolutely unhinged thing to do, but it works because rui is also unhinged and shows are the language he speaks best.

I think after the main story rui’s continued attempts to find the point where he’d finally become Too Much for tsukasa were unconscious. The brain likes patterns and it’s natural to attempt to make any exceptions to a rule fit with what you’re used to.

Wonder Halloween is absolutely rui’s worst nightmare coming true, in that he constantly goes to such great lengths to ensure that what he does is safe and people still leave anyways - and now he’s finally found someone just as crazy as he is, a place he can be accepted, and Tsukasa gets hurt because one of rui’s inventions malfunctions. If people left rui when it *was* safe, why on earth would someone stay when they actually got hurt because of him? & then tsukasa doesn’t leave, but rui pulls back because there’s no way he’s getting a second chance if someone else gets hurt. I think tsukasa being mad at *himself* for getting hurt and only getting mad at rui for pulling back was Huge because rui is so used to being too much, and now tsukasa is going “I won’t accept anything less than your authentic self.” Also huge because it showcases that tsukasa is a fucking freak.

The constant roping tsukasa into antics at school is (imo) another part of that - ok so tsukasa is fine with all of this on the stage, but what about in front of all of his peers? Getting in trouble and being labeled as weird will be the deal breaker right? Even nene doesn’t want to be seen around him. Nope! Tsukasa actually is going to act like they’re glued at the hip at school. Tsukasa cares about his reputation, in that he doesn’t want to be labeled as a trouble maker, but he’s already known as a weirdo and doesn’t really care. He’ll huff and puff about Rui being irresponsible and tarnishing his reputation but he’s still not leaving. Rui will purposefully annoy him & tsukasa will react dramatically but continue to associate with him.

Pandemonium is essentially an event about their relationship, & I’m not going to go pull a bunch of quotes (I am keeping this post solidly under control. I am not going to go insane with the evidence. I am normal and in charge of my own destiny.) but since I have this quote on hand:

Rui: I had always thought that I could never properly understand everyone around me.

Rui: as I started doing shows at Wonder Stage with everyone, my way of thinking and feelings began to change.

Rui: now, I am able to understand and connect with someone without relying on shows, and I’ve come to value the beauty of laughing alongside others

Rui: that’s why — tsukasa-kun. Thank you for giving me the chance to change.

The reason why pandemonium is the turning point for their relationship is because they’re connecting outside of shows. The reason why rui specifically cites tsukasa as the reason he changed is because tsukasa brought him to wxs, repeatedly emphasized that he would not accept rui holding back, and stuck with him when any sane and reasonable person would have been like “I value not getting detention on the daily and not dying on stage.” I say that with love. Pandemonium shows that rui *can* connect to people and form relationships without playfully threatening bodily harm several times a day, but the rui + tsukasa relationship is special in that they’re both insane Together.

One specific thing I want to point out is in the card story where tsukasa joins the disciplinary committee (I’m not transcribing that/pulling quotes watch it yourself) because he’s tired of having a reputation as a trouble maker. The easiest way to clear his name would be to stop associating with Rui at school, but tsukasa instead goes “I’m going to be taking responsibility for him and watching him carefully”. ??? Ok? Freak. (Tsukasa Tenma voice) you are NOT getting rid of me.

Last thing to mention is that saki, upon first meeting rui, is like “He must keep my brother in check I’m glad he found someone to do shows with 🥰” (funniest possible first impression of the ruikasa dynamic). This post is rui focused (consequence of spending the past 24 hours rotating him in my mind) but I think that because rui is so crazy people often forget that tsukasa is also insane. Even saki, who he’s objectively more normal around, thinks he’s a freak.

They’re both show maniacs. Matching each others freak. Absolutely misery inducing to be around if you haven’t built up a tolerance. I think they’re neat. I hope they both explode. You understand.

[whitehartlane]

karlsruhe (h)