#i cried making this one

[foldingfittedsheets]

Mattresses, unbeknownst to many, are a lot like cars. Every year new ones roll out, they’re always tweaking and innovating and you’ll never find the same one you loved decades ago when buying a new one.

Where I sold mattresses had a three month return or exchange program for this reason. New beds take a while to break in, and they’re a big expense. Your body is used to the old one. So we made sure people were loving it. If a bed got returned we’d take it back, sanitize and clean it, then sell it again on clearance.

To sell these we always had to disclose what clearance meant to customers, and they had to sign that they knew what they were getting. (FYI, not every company is as… forthright about the used bed situation)

In clearance we had beds that were floor models, we had returns, and more rarely we had old models whose line had been discontinued. These clearance beds were always final sale, so a bed could only be sold twice.

Now, the manager at the store I was working at had realized a vital fact. Clearance beds in the warehouse didn’t sell, especially old models that salespeople weren’t familiar with. And even more especially in odd sizes, like twin extra longs. So he set up a split king on the showroom floor to exhibit clearance beds, pulling all those forgotten twin extra longs out onto the showroom.

Almost all of these were brand new discontinued models. Beds I’d never learned in training were exhumed to be displayed. The manufacturers had moved on to new lines and they’d been left behind. Why would he take such in interest in selling old stock, you might wonder? Because we made double commission on the sales margin of clearance beds, and if we’d had a bed long enough they dropped the cost in the system so it was a fucking cash cow to sell these. Even with huge discounts the commissions were wonderful so it was a win win.

When I got started I was jazzed about this program, I was so on board to sell weird old brand new beds and make a ton of money. I had a wonderful older couple come in, looking for a split king adjustable set. This was a white whale sale.

The current clearance models on the floor were a latex mattress that was brand new despite being of an age to start first grade, and a tempurpedic floor model. The couple laid down and it was like magic. They each loved the bed they’d laid down on. They wanted to buy the whole shebang.

I. Was. Thrilled. I told them about the clearance program and what that meant, and they weren’t bothered in the least. I wrote up the sale then dashed into the back, fizzing with excitement to tell my manager what I’d done.

“You sold the death bed?!” He asked in delight.

I pulled up short, my smile freezing in place. “What…?”

“Didn’t you check the notes?”

I hesitated for a long beat then slowly shook my head. You see, dear reader, all beds had a personal history. Every clearance bed had logs written up by the person who took the return, as well as warehouse crew after sanitizing. It helped us know what to expect when selling them. “Wasn’t it just a floor model? You said it was a floor model…”

He slowly shook his head. I checked the notes.

It turned out, it had been sold as a floor model. The first time. But the company had made an exception and taken it back as a return two months later. Why? Because it’s owner had passed away.

I stared at the computer in horror and my manager shrugged. “They signed the clearance form. Technically it was a floor model.”

“We know for a fact that a man died in that bed!”

“What they don’t know can’t haunt them,” he said philosophically.

The man came back a week later for more sheets, utterly delighted to tell me how well they were sleeping. I clamped my teeth down around the secret of the deathbed, choosing to let them love their new bed without the stigma. Only one person would be haunted by that deathbed, and it was me.

[hinamie]

10 years later

[officialspec]

its definitely funny when marcille gets a little mean with it but its so important to me that they are also Best Friends

[cloaked-cloverr]

glamorous pony ✨

[poemeo]

i am thinking. thinking of hours past, thinking of the world, thinking of the end.

i am thinking of the girls i saw holding hands and jumping up and down together, excited about something i will never know.

i am thinking of the bird that built a nest on my house’s front door, and the eggs that have been laid in it.

i am thinking of the night my dog passed, when she ate her last treat, the life left her eyes, and her shaking finally ceased.

i am thinking of you, and the love i hold for you, the love that sits right next to my heart. i am thinking of you, and the times we held hands, and jumped up and down, and spoke of things only we knew. i am thinking of you, and the times we made new beginnings together, in places we probably shouldn’t. i am thinking of you, and how you and i are both here on a limit, and eventually, that time will be up.

i don’t know who will leave first. but i hope we leave together, holding hands, giving one-another our last treat.

[crismakesstuff]

puppet hour! 🧦🎉🩸

the image I’m redrawing here c:

[cubedmango]

they do this the entire way home

[gumdefense]

We have moved past Maya and Franziska wingmanning narumitsu as a society. They would not fucking do that. We need to realise the truth which is that Larry and Gumshoe would try to wingman them and only succeed through failure

[rainy-xp]

Im gonna pst this here separately just because I can-

But this is the original post!

[daisythornes]

SO what i would've done in my epic perfect ending to the umbrella academy is:

EITHER

- ok, if we must do the downer ending where they sacrifice themselves to save the entire world and must no longer actually exist. what would've been a lot more satisfying and clever in addition to that is: the umbrella academy comics exist in the new world.

Claire is the writer/artist mastermind behind the series, because she has this strange near-memory of someone once telling her these bedtime stories about a group of dysfunctional but endearing superheroes. she assumes it must've been her imagination, but still, there's a resonating echo of love.

boom. our brellies live on and get to learn and grow and be happy in some way, even if it's in fiction.

OR

- when Five is talking to all the versions of himself in the Five Diner, he first thinks it's the whole family that's the problem with the timeline and yeah, that they'd need to die so everyone else could live, but then!

the other versions of him tell him that no, it's not the whole family that's the wrench in the gears of the universe. it never has been. it was him.

this whole time, he's been looking for answers in every direction but within. he was the only variable he hasn't considered, the last unknown.

more specifically, it was him leaving his family that broke the timeline and caused the curse of the inevitable apocalypse.

that led to the Commission, to the Kugelblitz, to the Umbrella Effect/Keepers Cult - to every possible bad ending, in every timeline Five and Lila ever saw.

so, uh... maybe after a conversation with Diego and Lila if they wanted to resolve that whole situation more.... maybe after a conversation with Viktor (Five's childhood best friend, despite the show literally always forgetting about that)...

Five gets on the timeline train one more time, then jumps back to the day he ran away. maybe he's young again but with all his memories intact, because he's figured out how to control that now, maybe he just tells his younger self not to mess with time travel or leave home.

either way, Five goes back to dinner. then he grows up with everyone.

Ben doesn't die, because Five being there helps save him somehow. Klaus gets better, Allison learns to let go, Diego and Luther reconcile, and Viktor has a best friend to tell him he's always been special, and help him sort out his powers properly.

Lila and the other Sparrows and Jennifer are still alive in this version of events, they just grew up differently, in different places and circumstances. they all find their way to the Hargreeves, because of course they do. Allison has Claire. my beloved Grace is there.

Reginald dies, and they dance at his funeral. the world doesn't end eight days from then, or any time after that.

the show ends with the gang dancing to I Think We're Alone Now, but they're in the same room this time, all together in their old house, and everything is the way they've always deserved.

[grammatically-incoherent]

thank you mr. braugher. you did it right. and it was perfect.

[demigods-posts]

headcanon that percy and annabeth host a 'Grover Appreciation Day' once a month to remind grover how much they value him. they have a picnic out in the strawberry fields where they talk about their future and grover's role in it. they talk about getting married one day and asking grover to be the best man. they later explore the city and take pictures in place they definitely shouldn't. they go to lunch and cause harmless mayhem like they did when they were younger. they end the evening with a movie marathon of all of grover favorite nature documentaries and fall asleep cuddling together on the couch.

[hinamie]

alongside someone like you

[starry-bi-sky]

my martha knight au in a nutshell:

Danny/Martha: see up here?

Danny/Martha: *taps skull*

Danny/Martha: intense psychological damage

-----------

Danny/Martha: *upon finding out she's pregnant*

Danny/Martha: oh my god i cant be a mom, I'm fifteen and homeless--

Danny/Martha: im going to be a terrible mother--

Danny/Martha: i live in a cAR--

Danny/Martha: what if the baby inherits my powers? Oh no--

-------------

Danny/Martha post giving birth: i've only had Bruce for a minute and a half but if anything were to happen to him i won't even need to fuse with Vlad, I'm razing this goddamn planet to the ground myself

Danny, to Baby Bruce: you are the last remaining thread of my sanity. I'm going to give you the world :)

---------------

Danny/Martha prior to getting pregnant: Fuck it, if everything in my life has led to this moment, i'm allowed to make one stupid decision. I'm getting drunk and getting laid

---------------

Danny/Martha while Bruce was a toddler: i swear to fucking god i am going to kill the next person who talks to me--

Bruce: hi mommy!! i brought you something!!!

Danny/Martha, immediately flipping on a dime: hi baby!! what do you have?

Bruce, a weird child like his mother: a spider :)

---------------

Danny/Martha, talking to Falcone after he made an unsavory comment at her and Bruce: If you ever come near me or my son again, I will dig up your shithead father's corpse and make you eat his skin.

Danny/Martha: do you understand me

Falcone:... crystal, ma'am

---------------

Danny/Martha new in Gotham: *getting mugged*

Danny/Martha: *grabs man's arm*

Danny/Martha: I AM GOING TO BREAK YOU IN HALF LIKE A TWIG, FUCK BOY, DO YOU HEAR THE WORDS COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH--

(she then proceeds to terrorize Gotham's night life for the next extended period of time, mostly unintentionally)

---------------

Danny/Martha: Danny Fenton?? No. you must be mistaken, my name is Martha Knight.

Danny/Martha: this here is my littlest knight, Bruce.

Danny/Martha: I made him all by myself :]

[transsophiedevereaux]

hardison is such a homemaker... always getting them fully furnished new bases, always getting them ID's and plane tickets. is it any wonder that parker is so attracted to someone who always makes others just that bit more comfortable, who cares so obviously, who will make you a home that you can go to and leave from unconditionally, even if you never had a home like that before.

[faultyvessel]

My favourite piece of TMA canon that no one ever discusses is the fact that Elias has canonically watched at least a little bit of ghost hunt YouTube. Even Martin can’t believe it.