#i can indulge myself in my passions. that's kindness to myself

[jujutsusimp]

More than a weapon

🌸Gojo notices some change in his body due to his domesticated life with you and you love it.

Truly this is just a some self indulging fluff and cheesy romance but I needed it.

Content: Gojo x fem!reader, fluff, Gojo being insecure

“I really let myself go huh?”

You peek your head out of the book you are reading on the bed, watching Satoru look himself in the bedroom mirror, pinching a tiny bit of belly fat on his lower abdomen. This man is still carved like a Greek god, but finally, he has something more than muscles and skin.

“I will need to work on that,"  he muses absentmindedly, which makes you frown and answer instinctively: “Don’t you fucking dare.”

He raises an amused eyebrow at your intense declaration, looking at you with a teasing smile. “You like this, Babe?”, he demands with a chuckle while you let go of your book, getting up to embrace him. He doesn’t resist when you wrap your arms around him, burying your head in his chest.

"Yes, I do”, you state firmly with a pout, tightening your grip almost protectively.

“Yeah?”, he insists with a smile in his voice while he gently pets your hair.

“Yes…”, you assert, inhaling his scent, his odor is still discernible despite the flowery perfume of your soap. He always washes with your soap, and you love that. “I am working very hard for this, you know...”

He laughs, and you feel his chest vibrating against your face. “Are you trying to fatten me, my love?”, he says with a teasing voice.

“Not particularly”, you answer softly, feeling some kind of happy melancholia, “but this little belly, it’s proof of all the time you stayed hugging me on the bed instead of exercising...”, you start, peppering his rock hard abs with kisses. “… of all the time you stayed watching a movie with me instead of babysitting the whole sorcery world…” In your eyes, his body being slightly more relaxed is proof of your years of domesticated life together, and you cherish it.

You breathe deeply, digging a bit more your fingers in his back, noticing his hands had stopped petting you. In fact, he is really quiet, which is abnormal for him, and you raise your head to look at him. He appears so vulnerable right now that you feel your heart drop.

“I am allowed?”, his voice is barely a whisper, carrying so much emotions. So much fragility. You wished you had the strength to hug him harder. You wish you weren’t so small and you could shield him in your arms like he does with you. “Yes, yes you are, my love, of course you are. You are allowed to live for yourself… to let yourself go”, you affirm, echoing his first words.

“There are a lot of people counting on me, you know…”

You pout at his protestation, finally letting go of his torso to grab his cheeks. “I know, I am not telling you to stop saving the world, just that your whole life doesn’t have to revolve around your work.”

He seems deep in thought, hesitant, and you cut all further protestation by getting on your toes to plant a kiss on his face, until he is the one lifting you so he can kiss you back, loosing himself on your lips with a tranquil passion. There is no hurry in this kiss, just prolonged contact and devoted tenderness until he withdraws his head to contemplate you, his hands still grabbing you by the waist and upper thighs. There is so much love in those blue eyes, but also some doubts lingering.

“What are you worrying about, love?”, you ask softly, knowing he is still tormented. He looks confused, mumbling a bit as he thinks about it seriously for a moment. You don’t press him, caressing his hair gently in a soothing motion. Only an indecent amount of patience and love can make a man like him voice his insecurities.

“Useless… I don’t want to become useless.”, he finally admits lifting you a bit higher so he can bury his face on your chest and hide how troubled he looks right now.

He didn’t say powerless, or weak. He said “useless”. You contemplate his words for a second before kissing the top of his head affectionately. You still have a lot of work to do.

“You are not a weapon Satoru Gojo, you are a person, my lover, an incredible teacher, and a funny and passionate man. You don’t have to be useful, you have so much more to bring to the world than muscles and powers.”

You feel his grip tightening a bit on your body, almost painfully, but you don’t mind, closing your eyes while you dig your fingers into his hair.

“I don’t care if you don’t believe me yet, I will just repeat it until you know you are enough, you are wanted, you are loved strongest or not.” You hammered with an unwavering voice, holding all your stubborness for things that truly matter.

“Alright, alright”, he finally relents, his emotions vibrating in his voice but coated with sweetness. You look down at him, watching him lift his eyes out of your chest. “I believe you”

You smile proudly, borrowing his signature cocky smirk, which makes him smile fondly in return. Still holding you with one hand, he removes a strand of hair from your face, gazing at you with love. “I guess as long as I am strong enough to do that, it’s okay.”

You lift an eyebrow at his mischievous grin forming behind the tenderness. “Do what?”

Before you finish your sentence, he is making you twirl in the air into his arms, and you gasp, clinging at his hair to not fall with a delighted chuckle he soon echoes.

Yes, it was more than enough.

[ash-says]

Being in touch with your sensuality:

On today's episode of ash-says we are going to talk about how to get in touch with your sensuality. Personally it's something I am very passionate about and kind of indulgent too.

Sensuality helps me in feeling alive and in tune with myself. I can't guarantee it for everyone but for me it works wonders. It's like the "Amrut" or "rejuvenating water" (for a lack of better terms) for me. Along with that it's the most healthy way for expressing my sexuality and keeping it in control to not let it affect my day to day functioning.

Here are some ways I incorporated in the last five years of my life to be in touch with my sensuality:

1) Exercise: No matter what I am going to vouch for this always. The way it helps me in expressing the surplus energy and controlling my desires is a chef's kiss. Plus helps in tackling the sluggish feeling.

2) Dance: Especially the slow sensual seductive dance. Not only it's a good outlet but above all that it validates the emotions and creates a space to delve in it to create a beautiful synchronisation with the body movements.

3) Art: Create! Create! Create! Nothing better than creating beautiful art or writing poems, stories,etc to voice your passion for the world and it's offerings.

4) Music: I have playlists on Spotify that specifically cater to my sensual mood. It has all the songs that can set a tone for the bedroom (iykyk). Singing to it or dancing works wonders. It's a magical experience.

5) Meditation: You can meditate on those feelings to internalize it and put all that energy in proper use for achieving a goal,etc. This is something I very rarely do because I am a very active person but putting it out here cause it works for some people.

6)Play Barbie: This is my personal favourite. After all I am just a girl. I put on some makeup, wear a bold sexy outfit or a cute dress (depending on the mood) then spend my time reading a romance novel and listening to sensual songs. It's my kind of therapy🦋🦋

7) Be a model: Being all dressed up but not clicking any photos you got to be kidding me!!! Come on girl! Pose and click! You are not going to be this young again. The best thing I do is this. It literally helps in skyrocketing my confidence. I don't click pictures daily but boy when I do, God forbid!!

8) Unlearn the shame: The basic one. You need to own your body first and appreciate it. I know saying is easy but hey you won't get there if you never start.

9) Imitate things that you find sexy: I will explain this with an example, so I find laying on the bed on my chest with my legs dangling in the air extremely sexy so when I am alone I will lie on the bed in that way as a way of expressing. Secondly, we all know sipping wine while reading a book is incredibly sexy while being dressed all slutty but I don't consume alcoholic beverages so as an alternative I drink pomegranate juice. Plus I find pomegranate as the sexiest fruit for obvious reasons.

10) Invest in things that make you feel sensual and seductive: It doesn't need to be costly. Find your sexy and invest!! For me it's aroma candles, jewellery, deep neck tops, skirts, ribbons, art honestly I have developed a knack to turn any ordinary thing into something seductive atp I feel. Everything works for me. So exploreeee!! If you are experimental enough and don't have parental risks you can try out sex toys too.

That's all for today's show on ash-says. Stay tuned for more illegal tricks and explosive opinions.

[rjthirsty]

Clavis Exhibitionism

Words: 2.1k

Tags: College AU, Sound Exhibitionism, Female Reader - Insert, PIV Sex, Creampie, Kinktober2024

“Perhaps we should be indulging in each other somewhere else.” Clavis offered as you snuck into his dorm room again.

Your very affectionate, very passionate, and very horny boyfriend somehow scored the room at the end of the hall, next to a fire exit that he'd let you in through, and the two of you had been making the most of it. To say you were fucking like rabbits was not far off. Every time you visited him you both ended up with your clothes stripped off, and utterly exhausted and pleasantly sore afterwards. Clavis had stamina for days. And you'd never been so taken care of before. 

“Wait, somewhere else? Why?” You went through the normal routine of removing your shoes and dropping onto his bed.

“The shifty fellow next door has made it clear he is aware of our activities.” Clavis shot a disapproving look at the wall he shared with his neighbor. 

That was quite the sentence. A multitude of emotions and thoughts simultaneously sprouted causing your jaw to drop and eyes to go wide as you turned to also look at the wall Clavis was frowning at. Your eyes darted back to Clavis and a surprised chuckle bubbled out from you as you tried not to grin too big. “You mean he can hear us?” You asked, stage whispering because now you're a little self conscious about being too loud.

“Apparently.” Clavis frowned deeper.

You bit your bottom lip, fingers covering your mouth as you touched your fingertips just above the peak of your top lip. It was shocking and delicious and kind of exciting and oh so very wrong, but incredibly bold for him to have said anything. “He's not going to snitch, right?”

“Oh, no. I don't believe that's the case.” Clavis answered, his golden gaze finally coming back to you. 

“Did he say what he heard?” Once again you bit your bottom lip, a devilish smile threatening to take over. 

“You're surprisingly inquisitive about this. Are you interested in that sort of thing?”

You set your palms on the mattress and give a small shrug with a playful head tilt, allowing the grin you've been trying to hold down to finally freely form. “And what if I am?”

Clavis’ lips quirked up in a teasing smirk. “Is that so~?”

He swept across his small bedroom to kneel in front of you, his low bed putting the both of you at nearly the same height. His fingers ghosted along the back of your ankles, sliding up your calves with the pressure of his touch increasing as he moved up your legs. “And here I thought you were an innocent one.”

You can't help but chuckle at his musing on your innocence. You were anything but. “We've all got something that excites us.”

Clavis’ hands pushed up your thighs, crossing onto your shorts where he hooked his fingers in the waistband. Eager for what was to come, you leaned back on his bed, resting on your elbows so you could lift your ass as he pulled your shorts and underwear free at the same time. He spread your legs and edged closer so he could sit between them. His fingers gripped your thighs, he had always loved your legs.

“What about you, Clavis? Doesn't the thought turn you on?” You rocked your hips from side to side, gently rolling your sex in front of him teasingly. “To know that despite our best efforts to keep me quiet, he can still hear how you make me moan. How many times have you had to cover my mouth because I couldn't think to do it myself? How many sounds did I bite down? All so we wouldn't get caught.”

His cock was steadily growing more stiff the more you spoke, and you were becoming more wet. You liked when he shushed you. You liked the thrill of being caught while he was fucking you senseless, how he had to kiss anywhere else but your mouth because to let your voice out would be the end of the fun you two had.

Clavis’ lips warmed your inner thigh. His hands gently caressed your naked legs. When he spoke, you could feel his mouth on your skin. “When you put it like that, it's almost flattering.”

“Mmhmm.” Your teeth toyed with your bottom lip. He was being a tease tonight. “And he's over there, getting turned on by us. But now how about I get the chance to moan your name? Can you imagine how sweet it would be to hear your name on my lips. He'd know how good you make me feel. He'd hear how often you were buried deep inside me. How many times you'd make me cum.”

Clavis slowly kissed up your inner thigh as you spoke. His tongue touched before lips met your leg, creeping ever closer to your waiting cunt. An appreciative groan came from him as an answer to your fantasy put into words.

“Let's make him wish he were you. Let's be noisy for once. Just this time. Let's make him envious. He could never have the real thing because I'm yours and you're the only one that can fuck me so good. Ah–” You gasped as Clavis finally reached your pussy, drawing a long lick between your folds. He repeated those delicious licks, wetting your clit by swirling his tongue around it. “Haah… nghn, Clavis.”

He moaned and the reverberation of his voice buzzed your sensitive bud. His lips puckered around it and he sucked your clit into a kiss. Fuck, he was so good with his tongue. He flicked the tip, caressed with flat licks, and varied the pressure as he played with your pussy. You could feel yourself leaking as your wetness dripped down your perineum.

Quiet keening leaked out of you. You were allowing yourself to make your enjoyment known, but still didn't want to get too loud. One neighbor knowing was fine. The whole hallway was not. Shifting, you brought your hand above your head and knocked purposefully against the shared wall. Clavis huffed mid-lick, his chuckle feeling foreign but decadent as he hummed before he spoke. “What a naughty vixen you are.”

“Uhnn--Clavis,” you moaned, his tongue circling your entrance. You wanted the guy next door to hear you call your lover's name. Imagining him pressing his ear against the wall to be certain he heard your moans thrilled you in a way you'd never experienced before.

The build up when Clavis used his mouth was always wonderful, but if you really wanted to scream you needed his cock inside you. “Mmmmn, Clavis?” You threaded your fingers through his hair. “Fuck me? Please?”

Clavis lifted his head to look at you, his golden eyes smoldering with lust. “Already? Impatient today? Or is it that you can't bear to be empty of me?”

He scrubbed a hand over his mouth to wipe your fluids from his face and worked his belt and pants loose. You crawled around the bed, turning so you were in it properly instead of short-wise how the two of you started. Knees bent, feet planted on the mattress, fingers fondling your stiff clit and the bundle of nerves that ran under the skin there, you licked your lips in anticipation as Clavis positioned himself between your knees.

“Fill me up.” You whispered seductively as you spread your labia and legs wider for him to fit.

Clavis sank into you. You were so wet he didn't need any additional strokes to bury himself fully in your cunt. He filled you and you pulsated around his cock. “Oh fuck, oh God, haaahnngh– Clavis!”

Your voice must have sparked something in him, because he gave you no time to adjust, pumping into you right away. His cock pushed into your cunt, rubbing your walls that were still trying to manage his size while also flexing around him. Ah, he felt so good, so hard. You loved to feel him bare inside you. 

Clavis scooped up your ankles, one at a time, setting your knees on his shoulders, kissing the inside of your leg as he put each one into place. Your pussy squeezed him tighter with your legs pressed together rather than spread wide around his hips. He loved the way you felt, too. The way your folds slid against his dick, the way your inner walls fluttered around him and how you felt where his tip rubbed your insides.

A moan escaped you, low and drawn out as he adjusted to push you into a mating press. His cock going even deeper and nudging against that sweet spot that made your eyes roll back. One of his hands grabbed your hip, as if to hold you in place as he pumped faster and pounded harder. His fingers dug into your soft flesh, leaving marks that wouldn’t bruise but would stay red for some time to come.

Instinctively, you went to cover your mouth, but remembering that you intended to put on a show for Clavis’ neighbor, you instead bit your knuckle as you let your squeaks and gasps pass through clenched teeth. Clavis was more enthusiastic than usual, his hips slapping against your ass, literally pounding the sounds out of your throat with every thrust, his weight rocking you and the bed.

Your fingers on your free hand dug into the comforter. You were close, the pressure in your belly growing tighter and tighter. Spreading your legs to drop them from Clavis’ shoulders, you opened your hips for him and felt him sink that last half-inch from nothing padding between your hips and his. His cock bottomed out, his pelvis completely flush with yours. Just a little longer and you’d be coming, you were so. Very. Close.

The noises you were making must have clued him in because after a few thrusts as deep as he could reach, Clavis ground his sex against yours, churning his cock inside you. The way his pubis mons rubbed against your clit while his dick rubbed you from the inside was exactly what you needed.

The stimulation sent the pressure bursting inside you. It snapped, cracking like a whip to the back of your skull. You might have been whimpering and keening before, but now you let out full blown moans that you couldn’t stop even if you wanted to. Every breath, every exhale had you loudly crying out as your cunt spasmed and clenched again and again while Clavis refused to relent, continuing to stimulate you and draw your orgasm out.

He rode through it, enjoying the way you squeezed and milked him. Dropping down to press kiss after kiss against your parted lips, he resumed rocking into you once you finally regained the ability to control your voice again. He hadn’t yet finished, and from the way he was stroking himself with your pussy, you knew he wasn’t going to last much longer. Clavis always slowed down right before coming, like he needed to draw out the feeling of you on his cock.

“Mmmmmn. Haaaah.” You allowed yourself to make pleasurable sounds, feeling every part of his dick rubbing against your sensitive insides. Unintentionally, your cunt clenched, perhaps you liked to hear yourself too? You had never really considered it before. “Nnngh, Clavis.”

As his name passed your lips, Clavis bucked into you. Without pulling out, he thrust against you again, and then a third time, trying to bury himself deeper, his biological need to pour his seed as deep as he can taking over.

“Oh fuck–nnngh!” You couldn’t feel his seed spilling inside you, but the way his cock throbbed, and the way his hips connected with yours was telling enough. And damn! It felt so good to have him thrusting so deeply, unable to pull himself free of his instincts. Like your sexes were communicating, you couldn’t help as your pussy spasmed in response to his cock pulsating inside you. 

Clavis cuddled against you on top of you, and you brushed your fingers through his hair. It wouldn’t take him long to be ready to go again, his cock rarely ever got soft once it was hard. The both of you took your time to catch your breath, nuzzling in the warmth of each other and the heat you had generated. Your lips connected, and wet kisses were shared between the both of you. His tongue sought yours and you matched his enthusiasm.

Clavis’ hands began to wander over your body, groping all the places he hadn’t had a chance to, yet. Then an uncommon sound came from the wall shared with the neighboring room. A purposeful knock. Tap. Tap. Tap.

Your jaw dropped and Clavis’ eyes went wide before you both erupted into laughter.

“What do you say we give him another round to listen to?” You giggled, fingers trailing over Clavis’ lower back.

“Only if you make those same sounds, again. You sang beautifully.” Clavis shifted, covering your mouth with his and coaxing a low moan out of your throat.

[blushcoloreddreams]

Perfume IS an essencial: Here’s 4 reasons why

Good Afternoon Dear Reader! Happy Saturday directly from Argentina

Before we dive into today's topic, I wanted to talk briefly about why these "practical" and lighter and style blog posts are JUST as important as the heart-felt blogs on heavier topics and more practical ones like organization, cooking and cleaning tips

This blog is a place where I am trying to gather useful information to help us grow as feminine women, whether that is in our hearts, our homes, our lives, or even in our own skin. I believe in a well-rounded growth perspective: I am trying to improve many areas of my life, even if they are just practical and simple.

So today I wanted to talk about one of these more "practical and simple" topics: perfume.

At first glance this topic can seem kind of boring, like "yeah, no one likes smelling bad, so wear perfume, DUH." But I think perfume is so much more than that!

I believe that a spritz of perfume can actually improve your day, your confidence, and your overall aura as a feminine woman.

***DISCLAIMER: I know that smells can trigger allergic reactions in people, and there are actually fragrance-free zones such as certain churches or work environments. Do not break those rules just to follow my advice LOL!

The women jn my life were always had a passion from perfumery and I remember using it even as a child, but I only started being interested in it during my teenage years and in the past my interest and collection only grew. But I remember that during times of intense sadness in my life, I understand that something simple as even filling in your eyebrows can be a completely exhausting task! So much personal care falls off your daily routine when you can't handle what life is throwing at you and I think that adding perfume to your routine can be an easy way to elevate your grooming.

In order to really stick to this habit, I decided to focus on WHY I should wear perfume. So here we go! This may convince you too.

1. Perfume Adds LUXURY To Life

I know what some of you may be thinking: "I'm just at home, and deodorant is good enough for me!" or "I'm just in an office chair, why do I need to smell amazing?" and finally, "I'm just going to work out later so it doesn't matter!"

You know what I say to all those reasons?

You are an amazing woman and you deserve to have a little extra luxury in your day, even if you are behind a vacuum, a computer, or a treadmill.

Most of us aren't going to be lounging on a velvet chaise with champagne and a cashmere blanket wrapped around us tonight anyways! We're not living that lux life, so why not add extra luxury into our days?

When you're vacuuming the house or reading through spreadsheets, it can be easy to feel like cinderella BEFORE she went to the ball. A fragrance reminds you that you are an elegant, feminine WOMAN, and that you are WORTHY of a little luxury.

So pick up a fragrance you love, (doesn't have to be costly,) and indulge! You are WORTHY of that extra 10 seconds on yourself.

2. Perfume Can Make You HAPPIER!

So today I was spritzing on some body spray when I realized that I had a soft smile on my face. Seriously: I was just smiling to myself! Sol de Janeiro cheirosa 71 (my newest obsession! ) evokes a reaction of pleasure: it makes me smile.

Do you remember learning about the senses in school? They can evoke emotion, thoughts, feelings, and action. Touch can make you take action when you feel pain. Taste evokes pleasure when you encounter delicious food. Likewise, smell can evoke pleasant emotion or distaste.

If there was a little life hack that could have you smiling 2 more times a day than you already do, wouldn't you do it? Fragrance is SUCH simple way to accomplish this!

And a bonus? When you smell good, other people notice! I LOVE when my husband tells me I smell good, or when a friend goes in for a hug and comments that she loves the smell I'm wearing. Smelling good feels GOOD!

3. Perfume Helps You Get in Touch With FEMININITY

When I was a kid, Id watch every morning my mom and grandma get ready and wear their favorite perfumes ( that I have the smell in my memory to this day). I made a promise to myself that when I became a woman at the age of I would begin doing 3 things EVERY DAY: wearing lipstick, carrying a stylish purse, and wearing perfume.

I think I knew, even as a child, that perfume was for women. Full grown, feminine, gracious, beautiful women. Adding fragrance to your routine is a way of stepping into that feminine womanhood and embracing yourself.

Perfume can also be especially helpful for women who are kind of uncomfortable with their femininity. You can begin exploring the possibilities with just a small change. Add a bit of mystery, femininity, sweetness, or glamour to ANY outfit. Elevate your look and tip toe into femininity with a fragrance. Pair a ponytail and sneakers with some vanilla body spray: you might be surprised at how it makes you smile!

4. Perfume Helps You EXPRESS Yourself

I truly believe that the sense of smell is neglected in our modern culture. We are MUCH more focused on the visuals of our beauty routine: hair, fashion, makeup, etc. And why? Well, you can't smell a picture on Instagram! Why invest in something so small when no one can really experience it? Who cares about smell?

Well, maybe we SHOULD care! When you meet someone, you are taking them in through a lot of the senses: a firm handshake, the visuals of their face, the way their voice sounds, and yes, THEIR SMELL!

When you go out into the world, think about the entire picture of you as a person: your smell, your style, your "vibe." What is your overall aura? Perfume can help you add a dimension of creative expression to your overall vibe and style. Express yourself!

***Bonus tip: Hydration is essential for perfume performance and it starts from the inside by drinking enough water and continues with applying lotion before your perfume. (Even better if you can do it post shower when your skin is still a bit damp). Some people also apply a small bit of vaseline or petroleum jelly to your wrists and neck (the pulse regions) before you spray. It helps your scent last longer!

And closing, perfume can add luxury to our day, help us feel happy, help us get in touch with femininity, and allow us to express ourselves! What's not to love?

xoxo

Júlia

[merbear25]

With a s/o who doesn’t celebrate their birthday (Luffy, Law, Corazon, Caesar)

a/n: My birthday is later this month, and I haven’t celebrated it in many years. The day isn’t particularly joyous for me for many reasons, so I decided to write something for myself. Idk if anyone else feels the same about their birthday but hope you enjoy this nonetheless.

CW: SFW, gn!reader, fluff, some angst, an ounce of modern au with Cora’s

Luffy

With your birthday drawing near, you were merely hoping that the day would pass without a hitch. However, it just so happened that Luffy got the idea to ask you when your birthday was.

You didn’t want to lie to him, so you gave him the correct date. He looked at you, as if processing how close the day was. When it dawned on him that it was practically just around the corner, he gasped and got excited.

“We gotta celebrate then! We can have a big cake and lots of food!”

“No, that’s okay.” Your refusal was kind, which meant it wasn’t interpreted how you intended.

“It’s fine! We’ll get Sanji to do it!”

“No, that’s not what I mean,” you protested.

“Huh? What’s wrong?” He tilted his head to the side in interest.

“Well, I don’t celebrate my birthday.”

Complete and utter shock washed over him. How could someone as amazing as you not take full advantage of one of the best days for anyone. “What! Why not?” He shouted.

You put your hands up to hush him, so as not to alert the others that Luffy was getting excitable. “It’s just a normal day for me. Not anything worth celebrating in that sense.”

“Not anything worth…” He hopped down from the counter he was sitting on and clamped his hands on your shoulders. “You more than anyone should be able to celebrate yourself!”

The sudden intensity in his eyes put you a bit on edge, although the passion he had in his words struck you to your core. “Thank you but really. It’s no big deal”

Unconvinced by that, his eyes kept their hold on you. With not much else being said, he left the kitchen to join the others.

Unsure how well that actually went, you chose to brush it off.

As your birthday was coming to an end, you realized that the others were nowhere to be found. When you opened the kitchen door, you were met with a table filled with all of your favorite foods and everyone chatting and having a grand time.

“What’s all this?” You asked Sanji

“Hm? Just thought we could indulge a little.”

Taking your seat, you soaked up the atmosphere—your friends enjoying themselves, filling the room with laughter as you shared a meal together. You leaned over to Luffy to express your gratitude.

Even with his mouth full of food, he managed to smile just as affectionately as any other time.

Law

He was observant, which was one of the things you both loved and hated about him depending on whether you were trying to be sneaky. This time was no different; with his eyes focusing on you one too many times, you got the feeling that he’d noticed something was wrong.

“I’m fine,” you broke the silence.

“I didn’t say anything.” His gaze remained fixed on you.

“But you were thinking it.”

He inched closer trying to get a better read on you, his eyes seemingly burrowing into your soul.

“Okay, okay,” you huffed, “It’s my birthday. It’s coming up soon and I just…I just don’t want anyone making a big deal about it.”

As your eyes hesitantly met his, the cold stare he had had shifted into one with compassion. 

“I can relate to that,” his words alluded to more pain than he’d probably anticipated. “Sometimes it’s easier to treat it just like any other day.”

You nodded, feeling the tears build up in your eyes. Of course, you were well aware of the hardships he had to overcome. The adversities either of you faced were your own. The experiences that weighed on you in different ways and yet were still parts of each other you could easily connect with.

“We don’t have to do anything if you aren’t up for it.” Even with the cool tone, the support he was giving you was unmistakable.

Having spent your birthday the way you had intended, Law approached you. Looking up at him, you gave him a meek smile—-the conflict of not celebrating your birthday this year didn’t quite sit well with you.

“I want to show you something.” Offering you his hand, his touch was tender as guided you to the deck.

Stepping outside, you were met with the Aurora Borealis. “We were passing by at the perfect time. Thought you might like to appreciate them with me.”

With the inner-strife you’d been dealing with subsiding, you happily took a seat next to him. Gazing up at the beauty swirling in the sky, you leaned your head against his shoulder.

He rested his head against yours, adding a sincere, “Happy birthday.”

Corazon

He was one of the most attentive individuals who could pick up on how you were feeling before you yourself had even realized. As the days came and went, it became more and more obvious that something was weighing on you.

Coming over to where you were, he sat beside you. With the softness never leaving his demeanor, you couldn’t help but melt from the warmth he radiated. 

When you gave him a smile, he placed his hand on top of yours. “How are you?” Such a simple question yet one that held vague concern.

“I’m alright,” you chuckled. “Don’t I look like it?” Even your playfulness seemed to be a front you were putting up.

He hesitated, taking a moment to notice the subtleties in your voice and expression. “No,” he spoke with sincerity. 

Breaking eye contact, you looked down at your fingers laced with his. “My birthday is coming up, and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it.”

He watched your fingers trace his hand before bringing them to his lips. “I can sympathize with that.” With his eyes meeting yours again, he led the conversation with his heart. “But you of all people deserve to feel special on their birthday.”

“You always know how to pull at my heartstrings.” The smile you wore trembled as your chest swelled with a heaviness.

“Aw, I didn’t mean to upset you!” He pulled you in for a hug.

Holding you closely, he made a suggestion, “We don’t have to have a formal celebration, but what about getting something to eat? Just the two of us?”

“I’d like that.”

When the day came, Rosinante drove the both of you to a secluded spot on top of a hill. Turning to smile at you, you wondered if this was the spot.

“Oh, yeah, this is it!” While he took the glasses and packed food from the back seat, he pointed to the treetops. “When the sun sets, the light peeks through those trees just perfectly enough to shine on the water, making it look like it’s sparkling.”

When he handed you some of the food, you smiled as you pressed it against your lips. 

As the sun set and the water resembled crystals, you allowed yourself to appreciate how special this day could be. 

“Thank you,” you whispered.

Caesar

Humble and wanting to remain out of the spotlight: ways one could never use to describe him. He took full advantage of his special day, wanting to be the main character. After being his other half for a few months and celebrating his birthday, it got him wondering.

“I don’t believe you’ve ever told me when your birthday is.” The careful phrasing was intentional—purposefully pushing off any blame for not asking sooner.

“I haven’t,” your tone was just slightly indifferent towards the topic but was light-hearted enough not to be mistaken as taking offense. “It’s in two weeks.”

He blinked at you, not fully understanding why you hadn’t brought it up sooner, why he had to be the one to ask. “Why didn’t you mention it sooner?”

You shrugged, delivering the answer in a cool tone, “It doesn’t hold many fond memories. It’s just another day for me.”

It was absolutely ludicrous to hear you say that. The one most suited to stand by his side not allowing themselves the proper celebration they clearly deserved had him stumped.

He chose not to pry, instead thinking of little ways he could help you feel special on your day. He easily gathered tidbits of information to make this coming birthday one you could look back on with fondness.

While that day began like any other, Caesar was finishing the small preparations to surprise you. When you finished your work, he went to collect you, guiding you to the kitchen.

“Ah!” He feigned irritation. “Those idiots made such a mess. Wait here.” He turned the corner, shuffling about the kitchen. 

When the lights turned off, you called out to him. Peering behind the corner, you stood there for a moment before you saw a faint glow coming from behind the counter.

“What’s this?” Your heartbeat quickened from the hope that he’d planned something for you.

“I know that you don’t quite like your birthday, but there’s no harm in having cake now, is there?”

There was a faint tightness in your chest from the sweet sentiment. As you came closer, you noticed that it was your favorite flavor. With the soft glow of the candles flickering on top of his unusually kind gesture, you looked up to see him smiling—nervously awaiting your reaction.

“No harm at all.” Although your smile was weak, the emotion held in your voice and the affection in your eyes spoke volumes. “Thank you, Caesar.” 

The heartfelt appreciation made him giddy with joy as you happily blew out the candles.

[etherealyoungk]

why do you love me? - kwon soonyoung

in which you ask soonyoung why he loves you

pairing: soonyoung x reader

warnings: fluff

word count: 600

you stare down at soonyoung, who's kneeling down, his brows furrowed in concentration as his fingers carefully work to tie your shoelaces. it's late, the cold night air making you shudder from the chill even though soonyoung's jacket is draped over your shoulders, and you pull it closer around yourself.

soonyoung looks so concentrated as he ties your shoelace, that cute pout you loved adorning his face. soonyoung was someone so loving, sweet, kind, and passionate. but sometimes you couldn't help but wonder why he loved you. what made him choose to love you? why you?

"why do you love me?", you ask softly and soonyoung's head snaps up upon hearing the question as he looks at you curiously. he thinks for a few moments and smiles at you softly. "do you really want to know?", he asks playfully and you nod your head.

"i love you because you insisted on paying for half of the meal and splitting the bill on your first date. i was so nervous but you made me feel comfortable and be myself. i love you because you held hands with me on our second date and i never told you, but i didn't sleep that night, because my heart kept racing whenever i thought back on the moment", he says, chuckling at his own silliness softly as he stands up and takes a seat next to you on the bench.

his hand gently and reassuringly holds yours, his loving gaze never leaving yours. "and i love you because you always text me good morning and goodnight. i love you because you indulge me, in my silly interests and ideas. i love you because on a hard day, you know just how to cheer me up. i love you because i can be myself with you", he says, all his words warming your heart.

"that's an awful amount of reasons to love me", you tell, holding back the smile that wants to break across your face.

"i could add one reason every day", he says confidently and you give him an 'oh really' look, which ends up with you finally giving in and smiling.

"oh and i forgot", he says, looking serious. "i love you because you're always wearing mismatched socks", he finishes, making you open your mouth to complain. "you swore you wouldn't talk about that, it's embarrassing", you whine and he chuckles.

"i just loose socks, i can't for the life of me keep one matching pair", you tell, frowning. "that's the clumsiest thing about you and i love it", he says proudly, smiling at you. it was the type of smile that made you stop in your tracks, the type of smile that melted your heart, the type of smile that was contagious and wholesome, the type of smile that warmed your heart.

you stand up, holding hands as you walk back home and soonyoung adjusts his jacket on your shoulders before you continue walking. you wrap your arm around his, leaning your weight on his body as you talk.

"don't you want to know why i love you?", you ask softly. he glances at you as you peer up at him. "only if it's more than five reasons", he says, making you snort out a chuckle. and that is how you end up listing all the reasons - all the silly, wonderful, cute, thoughtful, clumsy, adorable and endearing reasons you loved soonyoung for.

reblogs appreciated! | taglist: @daisycheols @naaaaafla @slytherinshua @weird-bookworm @idubiluv @qaramu @n4mj00nvq @itsveronicaxxx @joshuaahong @fallingforshua29 @frankenstein852 @strawberri-uyu @lvlystars

[b00kdiary]

Euphoria | Ithan Holstrom

Ithan Holstrom x Plus Size Reader

Where Y/N finds herself needing to be reminded just how desirable she is, and Ithan Holstrom is more than willing to show her. Here's to all my thick, fat, plus-size girlies who want some SJM men love too xo

Warnings: mature themes (18 +) swearing, body-image issues, eventual smut and the Ithan being utterly infatuated with his thick, beautiful lady.

MASTERLIST

I stared, unblinking, as Ruhn Danaan, Crown Prince of the Valbaran Fae, kissed his way down the neck of a gorgeous and dark-skinned Faun. I trailed my gaze along as he sucked and bit gently against her soft skin and perfect bone structure, the Faun's eyes closed, her face a mirror of lust and bliss.

The grip I had on my glass tightened and I willed myself not the shatter it, to not draw attention to myself, to how jealous and seething I was.

The fluorescent lights inside the White Raven danced over the two of them, highlighting their ungodly beauty as they danced and rocked against each other to the beat of music. My chest tightened at the way Ruhn's arms wrapped so effortlessly around her slim waist, resting against the perfectly flat length of her stomach, revealed by her cropped bralette.

She was lovely by most standards and typical of the kind of females Ruhn was seen with- tall with small breasts and a small, yet nice ass and petite enough that there wasn't a single place that sat out or rubbed or curved too much.

Unlike me.

I swallowed down the lump in my throat, taking a long indulgent sip of my drink to drive away the dryness and the sorrow. It was hard not to trail my mind into those uncharted, dark waters, the kind of scary, hollow place of insecurity where I could pick myself apart and rip any sense of security I had to pieces.

Because unlike that Faun, who had turned now, her toned back facing me as Ruhn kissed her, kissed her with so much passion and need that it made me feel sick. Unlike her, I was not petite or skinny and I did not look like the kind of girl that Ruhn Danaan desired.

"You're glaring, Y/N." A deep voice interrupted my pity party and snapped me back into this room, away from all the meanest, cruellest thoughts I had of myself.

I turned, levelling out my eyes and surprise-filled me when I met with honey-brown eyes and a smile that could melt a girl's heart and drop her panties.

My lip kicked up as I took in the golden-brown soft waves of hair and tan sun-kissed skin, my gaze moved down, over the acres of strong, corded muscle that was further accentuated by the form-fitting t-shirt he wore.

"Ithan Holstrom," I mused, cocking my head at him, and seeing his lip tilt into a lazy smile "You're the last person I expected to see here, I didn't think this was your kind of scene."

"It's not, not really but," He shrugged, glancing over his broad shoulder to where a few wolves sat gathered around a table "But the pack forced me."

"You don't strike me as the type of guy who can be forced to do anything," I raised a brow, tossing a long strand of hair over my shoulder and felt Ithan's eyes track each movement. "Don't try and hide it, you came here for a good time, a good fuck maybe?"

He chuckled at my playful words, the sound rough and heady, running over me and prickling my skin. I forced myself to breathe as he stepped closer, close enough that his hard chest brushed against my breasts, and I felt the warmth and scent of him.

"Is that what you came for?" He asked, though his words weren't a question, not as he looked over my head, his stare pointed, straight to where Ruhn and that Faun stood "Or were you planning to glare at Ruhn Danaan all night, hoping he'd notice you?"

"Don't be a prick," I scowled, my lip curling and I pushed at his chest, hearing a rough bark of laughter escape him as he saw the fire burning in my eyes " I might be pining after Ruhn, but it's no different to how you trailed after Bryce like a lost puppy all these years, Holstrom."

His eyes darkened at that- those honeyed pupils shadowing into a starless night sky. Bryce was a sore topic still, even after two years and I felt guilt gnaw at me, hating myself for mentioning her, for the way that smile tilted down now.

"Bryce didn't want me, I knew she didn't," Ithan gritted back, his jaw locked and his eyes hard "Ruhn might want you, he could want you as badly as you want him, you're just too scared to find out."

"I'm not scared," I said defensively, crossing my arms over my chest, and yet again, I didn't miss how his steely gaze fell, something sparking in them as my top lowered and revealed my ample cleavage. I clear my throat, ignoring the twist in my gut "I'm just realistic, I know Ruhn's type, I've seen his type and I know I'm not it."

"His type?" Ithan mused, raising a dark, thick brow at me "What? Gorgeous? Desirable? No, you're definitely not his type." It was sarcastically drawled, accompanied by a sassy eye roll and it was the least serious I had seen Ithan in years- since Connor died.

"Try petite, skinny and perfect," I snort, but my voice isn't as joking as I would like, it's heavier, weighed down by the reality of the words.

"Bullshit, Y/N," Ithan scowls, and the way his eyes glared out in protest, in defence, it was as if he was furious at me for even saying what I did. "If Ruhn fucking Danaan thinks you're not perfect then he's a bigger asshole than I already thought he was."

I felt my face heat, my body turning hot and needy at his words, at the honesty and conviction behind them. He stepped closer, close enough that I smelt the mint and alcohol on his warm breath, and a fire sparked in my core- and I didn't step back.

"You think I'm perfect?" I whispered, my voice hoarse and shaking slightly. I couldn't stop staring into his eyes, couldn't stop watching the lust roil in them, darkening them by each second, we inched closer, drawn together like magnets. "Don't fuck with me Ithan, I mean it."

"Y/N, while you were busy glaring down Danaan and the Faun," Ithan said, his voice slipping into a low timbre, the gruffness clawing over my nerves and making me breathless "I was staring at you."

"You were?" My voice was softer than I wanted it to be, but my defences were wearing down. I had always found Ithan attractive, always wondered what he would be like as more than a friend. And as his hand snaked around my waist, large, veined, and ringed, and slowly dragged me to him, I knew that those feelings hadn't faded with time.

"You might not believe me, but I was staring at you, alongside damn near every other male in this room, Y/N," Ithan muttered, his face inches from mine and when his nose brushed against my cheek, my eyes fluttered. "If you had just looked around you, you would have seen how many wanted you- and how could they not?"

I felt his hand trail down my back and sides, over the rolls and curves of flesh, and I felt nauseous, hating that he could feel it. But he growled, a purely animal sound, his fingers digging into my flesh as if he was holding himself back as if touching me brought him to the edge of his control.

"Ithan," I swallowed, steeling my spine, and forcing back the fierceness and power I was used to wielding with men, "I'm not Bryce Quinlan."

"And I'm not Ruhn Danaan," He shot back immediately, his lip quirking "But that doesn't change the fact that I fucking want you, and I know you want me too."

I inhaled a shaky, long breath, my throat drying out at his words and at all the sinful, dirty images that flashed through my mind, filthy enough that I had to clench my thighs shut.

"Let's walk to yours, no cab," I say hoarsely, ignoring the way he grinned as I grabbed his hand and began dragging him to the exit. He followed dutifully, his fingers interlocking with mine, his thumb brushing soothing, soft strokes against my palm.

"Why?" He laughed, his brow raising at me as I glanced over my shoulder and I didn't miss the way my body ignited, striking, and burning as his gaze trailed over my skin.

"Because I can't promise I won't ride you in the back seat," I said honestly, gnawing on my lip as my eyes met his over my shoulder "And I don't want the night to end before it's even begun."

"Fuck," Ithan swore, low and dirty, and I could smell his arousal.

Just like I knew he could smell mine.

***

We walked through The Wolves Den with ease, silent and quick-paced as we waded through each corridor and climbed floor after floor.

Ithan had wanted to take the lift straight to his floor and had been so on edge that he looked as if he might have taken me against the wall in the goddamn lobby if I had given him the say-so. But I wanted him at breaking point, wanted that wolf inside him to come out clawing, biting and roaring.

So instead, we walked, each second that passed and the silence that stretched drawing the tension tauter and tauter, and I could feel my blood thrum in anticipation. Ithan looked over at me as we walked down the final corridor- and the smirk he wore, the knowing gleam in his eyes, told me everything he wanted to do.

"You have got to be kidding me, Ithan," A voice declared, female and high-pitched, loud enough that it grated against my senses and had both of us coming to a reluctant halt. I eyed the fifth door, which happened to be Ithan's room, with need. "Bringing the trash home?"

"Watch it, Amelie," Ithan growled, his eyes tapering in warning as he turned to glare at the dark-haired, golden-eyed female before him. His pack member- and a total hateful bitch.

"Why? Scared I'll scare away your whore for the night?" She snorted, her arms folding over her chest as she looked at me, amusement and cruelty gleaming in her eyes. I saw her stare trail between us, taking in our interlocked hands, the way our arousals wafted in the air, and she scowled.

Jealous, that much was obvious.

"Hey, Ithan?" I mused, glancing sideways at him, and smiling sweetly. He rose a brow at me, confused and half-amused. "Are the walls here thin?" I stared pointedly, past Amelie, to the open door at her side, number four- right next to Ithan's.

Ithan seemed to catch onto my thought trail and chuckled lowly, nodding his head "Very thin."

"Amelie," I smirked, my hand trailing up Ithan's muscled chest as he punched in the code and pushed open his room door, "When you touch yourself tonight, imagining that Ithan's fucking you and not me, don't be too loud- Ithan might hear it and go limp."

"You fucking-" Her eyes burned, and so did her cheeks, outrage and embarrassment filling her as she stepped toward me.

"Have a good night, I know I will." I winked and Ithan's laughter flittered over to me, caressing my skin like a phantom touch. The door clicked shut behind me, and suddenly, Amelie was gone, and it was just me and him, in his room, together, and alone.

"I don't think I've ever seen Amelie that red before, she's not used to being put in her place like that," Ithan noted, his eyes dancing with amusement as he leaned against the back of his sofa "She's not going to let that go, you know?"

"Amelie's a neurotic, insecure bitch," I scowl, walking a few tentative steps further into his room, "She can get fucked, I couldn't care less."

Ithan doesn't say anything else, remaining silent as my gaze lifts and washes over his room. I take in the four bare walls and the simple brown sofa, glass table and TV, a large double bed at the furthest wall and a chest of drawers and a matching wardrobe at its side.

"Not what you were expecting?" Ithan asked, cocking his head to the side as he observed my expression. I pursed my lips, looking over his folded arms, the way the muscles bulged, and I swallowed.

"I'm not sure what I expected," I say honestly, my voice quiet and when I slowly began to walk over to Ithan, I felt the tension in the air go taut. I paused, standing just before where he sat on the sofa's back, looking at me with a wry smile. "Were you being honest when you said that the walls are thin?"

"I was," He chuckled, revealing two sharp canines on either side of his upper teeth and I shivered at the sight of them. I imagined them against my skin, teasing, scrapping, and biting and I clenched my hands. "Were you being honest when you said you would be having a good night?"

I smiled at the heat in his eyes, at the way we were so close, yet we didn't touch not in one single place, and I knew he was holding out, restraining himself from grabbing on to me, just as I was.

"I plan to have a good night," I say, cocking my head in challenge "But really, it's up to you how good of a night for me it is."

One second, I'm standing before Ithan, smirking, cocky as I watch the lust burning in his eyes, and then the next, his fingers are wrapping around my throat, his ring digging into my jugular as he pulls me to him.

I groan as his mouth collides with mine and my body shakes at the heady, desperate way his lips move against me, tasting me, devouring me, taking me like it's his last night on Midgard. I melted into the strength and solidity of him, his hand at my throat, the firm pressure there, making my body turn weak.

Ithan's lips move against me, deep, languished strokes that fan the embers sparking in my stomach and I dig my nails into his chest, curling my fingers around the fabric of his t-shirt, needing to tether myself to him, to keep myself upright.

I whimper at the feeling of his left hand descending my body, his fingers gripping against every bit of flesh and curve with need, all the way from the top of my spine to the curve of my ass, and he groans as he cups me, the flesh spilling out and soft against his palm.

“Bed, now,” I pull back, my faces only inches from his and we’re both panting wildly, lust and need dancing in our gazes, like a mirror.

“Hm, not sure I’m a fan of being told what to do in my own place, sweetheart,” Ithan smirks, and my eyes flutter as he draws me closer, biting and suckling against my neck, the feeling of his canines against my skin driving me crazy. “Why don’t you try again?”

“Stop trying to be an alpha male, Ithan,” I manage to grit out, desperately trying to force down the moans that threaten to slip past my lips, but his mouth and tongue against my hot skin make it so hard. “We both know you’re really just a puppy- ah-“

A squeal escapes me as both of Ithan’s arms wrap around me, hooking under my ass and there’s a whoosh of air as he yanks me up into his arms, so fast my heart lurches and I’m locking my legs around his waist and holding onto his t-shirt so tightly I’m surprised it didn’t tear.

“You’re far too coherent right now,” Ithan grumbles and fuck if the sound of it doesn’t go straight between my legs. I hold onto him tighter as he begins to carry me over to bed, looking as if my weight is less than nothing to him right now. “I’m going to need to fix that.”

“Please do,” I whisper, tossing my hair from my face and bringing my lips back against his, slower, deeper, the hardness and ridges of his body brushing against my breasts feeling so good and the long, thick length rubbing against my thigh feels even better.

Ithan smirks against my lips as we thump against the bed and true to his word, Ithan drops me on the bed, so hard and fast I grunt at the impact, my body and tits bouncing as I land on my ass. The sight makes him smile, and the way he towers over me, looking like some kind of God has every nerve in my burning.

“You’re fucking incredible,” He mutters, and the honey in his eyes is gone, melted into the darkest chocolate, the kind that told me every filthy, heady, dirty thing he wanted to do to me. I leaned back on my palms as he rested a knee on the mattress, lowering his pleased face down to mine. “But I bet you’d look even better without all the clothes.”

His hand snakes around to the zip at the back of my top and fuck, fuck, fuck- I freeze.

“Or not?” He mutters, a crease forming between his brows at the way my body physically locks up and his hand immediately stops, resting flat against my back, his thumb rubbing softly to soothe me. “We don’t have to do that if you don’t want-“

“No, no-“ I shake my head, clearing my throat as I bring a hand to cup his jaw, loving the way he melts into the touch, “It was just a habit, a muscle memory reaction- No, trust me, I want to, I want you, Ithan.”

“Good, because I want you too, Y/N,” He mutters, smiling as he brings his mouth down, but he doesn’t pull at the zipper, instead he kisses me, tastes me, and enjoys me, and my hands curl into the root of his hair, glad for that moment of reprieve.

I can tell he’s being sweet because he is sweet, and now that he knows I’m hesitating, he won’t make the next move until he’s sure I’m ready- and I am, I am so fucking ready.

I pull back from him, my eyes locking with his and the room is so silent, deadly silent, as I draw my hand back and ever so slowly tug down the zipper to my top. The sound is almost sensual, making Ithan’s face darken, in anticipation, in feral lust.

I gnaw on my lip as the zipper pulls free and still keeping my eyes on his, I draw the top forward, down my arms, every movement deliberate until the fabric is discarded on the floor beside us. Ithan says nothing as he stares down at me, as he stares down at my bare chest, my breasts heavy and aching and I’ve never been gladder that I chose not to wear a bra.

His Adam’s apple bobs and the breath seizes in my lungs as his cold hand traces across my back, around to my chest and he groans, low and deep, the second his hand cups around my breast. I gasp as he kneads the flesh, his fingers slowly and deliberately tugging on my pebbled nipple.

“Ithan,” I growl, I can’t help it, he’s staring at me, looking like he wants to devour me, but he hasn’t bloody moved. “Do something, for Cthona’s sake.”

“So needy,” He croons, and I nearly sigh when he leans forward again and pushes me back to lay flat against the mattress. My body shivered as he climbed onto the bed, his large figure moving to hover over me, and I felt almost small in comparison to him, a feeling that was unfamiliar to me.

He kissed lower down my neck, his mouth inching closer as his hand kneaded my breast, rolling the sensitive bud between his fingers and tugging gently igniting so many sparks that I couldn't even speak, merely moaning breathlessly with each sure touch.

I gasped when his head ducked, his eyes shielded by the strands of hair that fell forward as he plucked one nipple into his mouth. My back arched and my fingers dug into his shoulders hard enough to hurt as the raw feeling of his tongue and teeth teased me.

“Ithan,” I moaned when he began biting against my nipple, not too hard, but firm enough that I felt the shock go through every nerve ending, sparking, burning, and throbbing, so hard I felt it in my core.

My head spins as Ithan begins shifting lower, and I cringe when he begins trailing his hands down my stomach, instantly thinking over every roll and stretch mark and flesh that was there- not that he seemed to mind. No, he kissed against the skin, trailing his tongue languidly down, just as infatuated as he had been before.

The tension in the air is thick as Ithan runs his calloused hands down the side of my thick thighs, kneading the flesh and teasing the material of my skirt, his intentions obvious. And with the ache beginning to become unbearable between my legs, I don’t hesitate to lift my hips, glad when he immediately hooks his fingers into the top of my skirt- pulling it and my underwear down in one go.

It’s almost amusing how quickly he discards the excess material over his shoulder, so transfixed on the sight of my naked body before him, sprawled out and burning from the intensity of his gaze.

“Fuck, you’re perfect,” He groans, his voice hoarse and the tightness coiling in my chest eases as he runs his hand up my thighs, feeling the cellulite and stretch marks and grins as he spread my legs apart for him to come between.

My heart races in anticipation as he sinks down below my parted thighs, his eyes burning with satisfaction as he comes level to my core, and the urge to clamp my legs shut fills me- which he seems to sense, if his strong grip on either side of my thigh, keeping spread wide apart is any indication.

I feel his hot breath against my most sensitive part and just when I feel like the seconds are dragging into minutes, making me fidgety and restless, I gasp at the feeling of his tongue flicking against my clit, soft and probing, coaxing out quiet moans from me.

“That’s it,” Ithan purrs and the sound vibrates against my core, making me clench my fingers into the duvet under me for purchase. Ithan seems encouraged by my moans, his tongue lapping against my clit in long languish strokes that draw pleasure from me in waves. “Taste so fucking good.”

He grins against me, cocky, sure, and under any other circumstances I’d hate it, but right now, I can’t find it in me. Instead, I reach down, lacing my fingers through his soft hair, tugging, yanking, and scratching, coaxing Ithan to give me more- which he happily does.

“Fuck, oh my-“ Two fingers prod my wet entrance, and the sound is so lewd as he quickly stuffs the two digits inside me, stretching me in the most perfect yet painful way, especially when he curls those two digits, hitting a spot that has me seeing stars.

“There we go,” Ithan coaxes softly, feeling my body start to vibrate and writhe, that pool of pleasure building and building within me, plummeting fast and harder as he fucks his fingers in and out steadily, in tandem with the smooth agile movement of his tongue against my clit. “There we go, such a good girl.”

I cry out, trembling and moaning as a white-hot blaze burns through me, starting at my core and running into my thighs and stomach, all the way down to my toes. I pant, my head fogging with the overwhelming blanket of pleasure that Ithan’s smothered me with.

Ithan groans, his teeth tugging at my sore clit before he eventually lets go, his fingers slipping out of me with ease. I exhale harshly at the loss of contact, sagging back as the euphoria dies down and my body settles into calm again.

Ithan ascends my body, a shit-eating grin on his wet lips and I don’t have time to even speak before he captures my mouth in his, pushing his tongue deep into me, letting me taste myself.

“How’s that for a puppy, sweetheart?” He mutters, biting my bottom lip and I roll my eyes at the sheer masculine satisfaction in his voice, in those bright eyes as he stares at me.

“Don’t be an arrogant prick,” I snipe back, ignoring Ithan’s laughter as I place either hand on his shoulder and the surprise that lights his face as I yank him down onto the bed beside me, flipping us so that I’m straddling him, makes me grin. “I’m still in charge, Ithan.”

“If this is you being in charge, I’m not fucking complaining,” He smirks lazily, his voice heavy with lust as he leans back, his eyes oh so slowly trailing across my body atop his, looking like the cat that got the cream as he enjoys every inch of me.

I smile, soft, as I run my hands against the seam of his t-shirt, my thumbs hooking under the material and slowly dragging it up- revealing inch after inch of tan, smooth skin, so much corded muscle it makes me hot. Ithan easily helps, and it’s not long before the material is over his head and thrown to the ever-growing pile of clothes on his floor.

I drag my core against the front seam of Ithan’s jeans, and our groans mix in the air at the feeling of his hard length brushing against me. I don’t waste any time, Ithan’s eyes never leaving me as I move my hands to the front of his jeans, my fingers fumbling against the button and zipper, almost desperate as I open them, tugging the materials down just a little.

“Shit,” I mutter, my eyes widening as Ithan’s hard cock slips out, breaking free and slapping back against his stomach. Ithan snorts at my reaction, at the sheer surprise on my face at the size of him, and my cheeks heat in embarrassment as he smiles at me. “Shut up.”

“Fuck, Y/N,” His eyes flutter as I grip my hand around his hard length, my fingers struggling to find purchase as I palm up and down, every moan and gasp that escapes him egging me on. “You’re fucking killing me here, sweetheart.”

“Poor puppy,” I tease, smirking and Ithan’s canines expose in warning, his hands coming to either side of my hips, and when he slowly lifts me up, dragging me closer to him, I prepare myself for the feeling of him inside me.

“Shit, shit,” I moan as Ithan’s cock brushes my entrance and I ever so slowly sink down, down, down, until he’s stretching me like he’s going to break me in two, until his tip brushes something far and deep inside me.

“Fuck, you’re so tight,” Ithan swears, his fingers digging into the flesh of my hips and thighs so tightly, I can feel the cut of his nails.

I flutter my eyes as the burn soon seeps into pleasure and we both suck in a gasp of air when I drag up, so deliberate and slow, all the way to the tip, before slamming back down, hard and fast. Ithan swears, his chest rising and falling so fast as I do it again and again, his cock slipping against my wet core like it was made for me.

“Ithan, oh-“ I whimper as I ride up and down his cock, alternating between fast, hard strokes and long, slow ones, Ithan’s hands at my hips guiding me along, helping me chase after the relief, and I know I won’t last long, not with the cord within me tightening so perfectly.

“Look at you riding my cock so well,” Ithan praises roughly, his teeth gritted as he pants and moans every time he sinks into me, and when my eyes lock with his, I’ve never felt more seen, more desired in my life. “Look at those tits bouncing, fuck, taking me so good Y/N.”

He ruts his hips up to meet me, the sound of him fucking in and out of me, so wild and demanding, is like music in the room, mixing with our moans, our low curses, and the way our hands wander over each other, unable to get enough.

My fingers scratch against Ithan’s chest and abs, my body starting to shake and weaken at how good it feels, how he’s hitting against a spot that makes my insides turn to mush, again and again. Ithan must sense my fatigue, sense my head spinning, because he grabs me, and within seconds, we’ve flipped over and he’s on top of me now.

His hand guides my thighs around his hips and my eyes roll, my back arches, as he sinks in even deeper and I whimper into his lips, into his mouth at the brutal pace he sets, slamming into me again and again, unrelenting, and merciless, so fucking good I can’t catch my breath.

My eyes flutter open as Ithan’s hand wraps around my throat, pressing firmly on either side of my neck and when my eyes meet his when I see the burning, commanding, domineering power behind them, it’s like something in me rips in two.

He hits a spot, some magic, fathomless spot inside me and it all shatters to pieces like glass.

“Ithan, I’m-“ I cry out, black dots blurring my vision and my body bucking and writhing against his hard muscles as release ripples over me like a tidal wave. Ithan grunts as I clench around him, suffocating his cock inside me, the orgasm hitting me and lasting longer than I’ve ever had.

“That’s it, that’s fucking it,” Ithan whispers, panting against my lips, and I feel his movements become sloppier, more erratic, more careless, driven to the edge by me coming around him. “Everyone in the whole fucking Dens gonna know whose making you feel this good.”

I whimper at the filthy words he grunts into my ear, my body trembling with the aftermath of my orgasm, edged on by the way Ithan still fucked in and out of me, chasing his own high and when his forehead rests against mine and he groans, guttural and heady and low, I know he’s found it.

The sound he makes, the growl that escapes him, reverberates through the whole damn room and my body is aching as he comes to a gradual stop inside me, our sweaty, panting bodies, melting into each other as we climb down from our peaks.

Ithan groans as he slowly slips out of me, the feeling of his warm cum leaking from me and dripping down my skin making me blush, and the small smirk that lines his lips as he inches back to look at me tells me he finds it both amusing and adorable.

“I can feel your cum leaking down my thigh,” I breathe and Ithan's eyes flutter, rolling as he laughs, burying his face into my neck dramatically, as if I were completely ruining him.

“Keep saying shit like that, Y/N and I might just have to chain you to this bed,” Ithan mutters against my skin, kissing and nibbling across my neck and jaw before he meets my lips again, kissing me sweetly as if memorising the taste and feel of me.

“After that, I’m tempted to let you, Ithan,” I grin, sighing as he rests his weight on top of me, his arms on either side making sure not to crush me, but the warmth and touch is welcome.

“Are you still thinking about Ruhn Danaan?” He muses, cocking his head, and the honey has returned back to his eyes, that smile turning boyish and soft again as he stares down at me.

“No,” I say simply, honestly, dragging my hand up his chest and neck, before settling against his jaw, my thumb drawing lines across the hard ridge there. “Are you still thinking about Bryce Quinlan?”

“Definitely not,” He smiles, earnest and firm and the sight makes my entire body heat again.

“Good,” I let my eyes darken, letting him see just what I was thinking as I wrap a leg around his hip, drawing his hardening cock back down against me- and he grins with feral delight at the action. “Because I haven’t quite gotten you out of my system yet, Puppy.”

-------------

@mis-lil-red @hyemishii @assaultsofthought @starswholistenanddreamsanswered

[yuurivoice]

Saw a goofball post about ASMR Roleplay, romantic plots, narratives, etc. and so on.

Let me share some of my philosophy with you as someone in this game for 7 years, 150k subs on YouTube, and who turned this into a lucrative business for himself. I say all that not to flex, but to assure you that maybe I know a little bit about what I'm talking about.

Audio Roleplays, ASMR Roleplay, etc and so forth is not some sort of rigid, strict thing. If you believe that content in this niche has to adhere to strict rules, structure, and expectations, you've already entered into this with strange expectations because there is such a vast array of ways you can go about presenting this content.

Some of it is slice of life moments in time with an assumed relationships between character and listener. Before narrative audios started to pick up steam, or rather, a handful of folks (myself included) developed followings centered on original characters and stories, the vast majority of creators in this space were just doing snippets of experiences. And, in case you were unaware, that approach is wildly successful. Boyfriend Experiences, audio smut, etc. has a much wider appeal at this time because a listener can drop right in and enjoy it.

If you have somehow deluded yourself into thinking that every audio has to adhere to strict narrative rules, be defined by conflict, or things happening beyond whatever the vibe calls for, you're willfully putting yourself and the niche in a box. Which is fine, but seeing people piss and moan about it is strange.

My approach has been to blend narrative series along with one-shots. One-shots serve as super self indulgent audios that aren't tied to the narrative and allow listeners to engage with some of their favorite characters they fell in love with in the narrative without furthering the plot.

Sometimes I play the game, explore tropes and clichés that are popular for the sake of taking a crack at it. Because it brings in new listeners who then become fans of my narrative work and creates genuine supporters of my passion projects.

And ya know? It fucking works. It works really well. I can drop a very straightforward, stripped down comfort audio with Alphonse like I did today and move listeners to tears. And then we can continue on with BitterSweet when I'm good and ready. It keeps the channel running, keeps the audience engaged, and keeps me working.

The bigger point here is that creators should be able to approach their work as they see fit, without concerns about goofballs with strange expectations and standards dictating to them what is and is not valid. You wanna know what's valid? Creating shit that you like, that the people who support you like. However you achieve that is all good in my book.

Having some goofy ass superiority complex about how people play pretend with pretty voices is strange behavior. I'm proud that my community has never flung that kind of nonsense around, and I'm speaking on it to affirm that kind of stance for the folks who rock with me.

If you're a listener who has recently stumbled into this niche, I implore you to explore, listen to others, find what you like and enjoy it because you enjoy it. There are countless people making audio content these days and there's no wrong way to do it, never has been. There's something for everyone, and if someone tries to tell you otherwise, be wary.

I'm not about negative nonsense, not about tribalism or putting down one person over another. Lift up your faves and share why you appreciate them and their style. But petulant bickering and shitting on others because of something as trivial as audio content? Nahhhh. If I catch anyone spouting nonsense like that in my name, I try and snuff it out as fast as possible because that's not how my shit is built.

If you are someone who fucks with me and my work but has had some opinions like that, I implore you to chill because none of this has ever been that serious. I want people to enjoy what they want to enjoy because for the love of fuck, life is too short to try and grandstand over this silly little niche. Or please get all the way away from me and my people.

Deuces. ✌️

[dr5amatic]

THE AGONY OF UNMADE DECISIONS ,

a sentence starter prompts list comprised of quotes from the novel if we were villains by m.l. rio. please be advised that this list may involve topics including, but not limited to, murder, death, and violence. change verbiage as needed.

why are you here? you should know by now i’m not going to tell you anything.

seems safer to let sleeping dogs lie.

it must eat you alive, not knowing. not knowing who, not knowing how, not knowing why.

you’ve kept your secrets all this time. it would drive anyone else crazy. why do it?

want to come out for a smoke? might help you relax.

your time will come to be the tragic hero.

let’s go skinny-dipping! i haven’t been swimming all summer.

seems like just yesterday my dad was shouting at me for throwing my life away.

you can’t do good work if you’re hiding, so we’re going to get all of the ugliness out in the open.

if you haven’t made any enemies in life, you’ve been living too safely.

you make a surprisingly convincing villain.

i know what you’re doing. you’re baiting me.

i don’t know about you, but i want to get cleaned up and go to bed and pretend this didn’t happen for like at least eight hours.

i think we were all fucked up from the start.

you promised me you wouldn’t say a word, so don’t.

i’m sorry, what the fuck just happened?

you know, people aren’t going to put up with your bullshit for much longer.

you’re probably the only person he’d listen to.

where’ve you been all night?

i was making the rounds for a while, but i got overwhelmed and snuck upstairs to do some reading.

i’m done with this fucking party, with all of them down there. what do you want?

why don’t you just tell me what happened? no performance. no poetics.

we can’t just stand around arguing about how it happened, we have to do something.

look, i know you have a pathological need to play the hero, but right now you need to stop and ask yourself if that’s really what’s best for everyone.

someone’s dead and you don’t know where you were?

before last night, everything was fine.

i care about you, and what might happen if you carry on like this.

he wasn’t an easy person to like, but he was an easy person to love.

what do you do? ignore your grief, or indulge in it?

maybe every day we let grief in, we’ll also let a little bit of it out, and eventually we’ll be able to breathe again.

i’m not going to kick you out of your own bed.

it doesn’t add up. we’re missing something.

you look like you might need someone to carry you.

i’m going to bed unless you’ve got something to say.

i’ve had enough of your sexual misadventures for one year, thanks.

it’s fucking freesing and i’m not leaving you out here alone.

when did we become such terrible people?

why don’t we get a drink or something? just us. i can’t think straight with everyone watching like we’re a reality show.

i just–maybe it’s because you’re you, and i mean, look at you–but i don’t understand. why me? i’m nobody.

you know, everyone calls you ‘nice,’ but that’s not the word. you’re good. you’re so good you have no idea how good you are.

we carry on as usual, or they’re going to want to ask all kinds of questions we don’t want to answer.

are you going to cold-shoulder me all night?

what’s gotten into you? you don’t sound like yourself.

you’re smarter than this. 

i’m not keeping any more secrets for you.

you can justify anything if you do it poetically enough.

you’re just going to leave me?

i think hell may have frozen over.

when you enter the theatre, there are three things you must leave at the door: dignity, modesty, and personal space.

anything can feel like punishment if you’re taught poorly.

you can’t quantify humanity. you can’t measure it–not the way you mean to. people are passionate and flawed and fallible. they make mistakes. their memories fade. their eyes deceive them.

i want so badly to be so mad at you that i could kill you, but i can’t, so i’m mad at myself instead. do you even understand how unfair that is?

i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i want to hurt the whole world.

why don’t you sit, and i’ll pour tea?

he was my friend—much more than that, truthfully—and that was enough. i didn’t need to know why.

can i help? i still–i want to help.

let me put myself back together and then i’ll come find you.

it’s like i look at you and suddenly the sonnets make sense.

tell me you didn’t do it.

i never wanted you to look at me the way you’re looking at me right now.

we have to go back and act like nothing’s wrong. we’ve got to get through tonight, and then we’ll worry about it. all right?

you know, it’s not too late if there’s another version of the truth you want to tell me.

will you rest easier with one less mystery on your mind?

you were real to me. sometimes i thought you were the only real thing.

[elaina-writes-things]

Hi I have a lucifer 18+request if you’re still on the high. You can make it a dable or headcanons. Whatever you’re most comfortable with.

You’re sitting on the couch reading a 🌶️ book and Lucifer crawls between your legs and tells you to keer reading as he eats you out.

I was gonna take it seriously, I swear. But I just really think Lucifer would act like this, and now here we are.

The content below is NSFW/18+ !!!

--

You loved to read when you were alive. Every home you lived in always had at least one, large bookshelf dedicated to your collection, and that didn't change after your death. You were thankful that, even eternally damned, there were simple pleasures to indulge in, and everyone who knew you could bet on finding you with your nose in a book if they needed your attention.

That was how Lucifer met you. It was also how he found you, waiting outside a restaurant for your first date. And how he found you the morning after you spent your first night together. And...well, you get it.

"If I didn't know any better," the seraphim complained, crawling into bed to settle next to you for the evening, "I'd say you liked spending more time with your books than little old me."

You slipped a bookmark between the pages of your current piece of literature, resting it in your lap, and gave him a sheepish smile.

"I adore you," you promised him, "I just love how wonderful these books are, too. Every turn of the page sweeps me away to an adventure of the mind. I can place myself in the protagonist's shoes from the comfort of my home! I can almost feel every struggle they endure. Every fight, every triumph, every kiss, every —"

"Kiss?" Lucifer perked up, and before you got the chance to respond, he'd snatched up your book and was flicking through the pages. "Ohohoo, my dearest, why didn't you tell me you were reading such salacious things? If you're looking to experience pleasure, by all means, you just need to ask."

Suddenly, the book was thrust back into your hands, and you stiffened as the blonde straddled you.

"Uh, what are you doing?" You asked, cheeks burning.

"Read to me, dove," Lucifer grinned, eyes alight the same way they did when he came up with a new duck-based innovation. "You want to live vicariously through your books? I can give that to you. So, read."

You glanced at the page Lucifer had flipped to and felt like you were going to catch fire. He'd chosen a scene in which the heroine of the book had stolen away with her appointed knight for an evening of passion before she was forced to marry the prince from a rival kingdom.

"Oh, I don't know," you muttered, "this is really — ah!"

Lucifer was still wearing that smarmy little grin as he pulled on your hips, dragging your body towards his, and started undoing the buttons on your pants. Cheeky fucker didn't even have to look, he was just popping them open with a flick of his fingers.

"Go on," he encouraged, settling himself comfortably between your legs after he pulled the fabric down. "Don't tell me you're getting stage fright? Show me what kinds of stories you indulge in so voraciously, darling."

You hid your face between the pages of your book, which only forced you to stare at the words he demanded you recite. When you tried to squirm away from him, only to have two deceptively powerful hands press you firmly to the mattress, you knew there was no getting out of this.

"Finally," the princess sighed, "alone at last, my dear. I am all yours tonight."

"Tonight. This night," said the knight, "but it could be every night...run away with me, princess."

"I want nothing more, beloved," she proclaimed, "but I have responsibilities to my kingdom. This marriage will forge an alliance that will help us for future generations."

The knight's face twisted in pain for only a moment, before it morphed into a calmness as cold as his armor.

"Then tonight, on this night, I'll make it one that you'll never forget."

"How many times can they fit the word 'night' into one chapter," Lucifer muttered, placing a small kiss on your knee. "Skip ahead a couple paragraphs. Get us to the fun part, my dove."

You resisted the urge to close your legs, knowing it would be a fruitless effort with how hungry his majesty looked, and flipped to the next page.

Princess Calliope carefully gathered up her skirts, the soft fabric brushing against her even softer legs. Xander, her knight, knelt in front of her and trailed one gauntlet gently up her calf —

"With his armor on!? There's no way that would feel good for her."

"I mean, he's gonna take it off eventually."

"Skip another couple paragraphs."

The princess shivered under Xander's touch. His large, broad hands squeezing her thighs pulled a gasp from delicately parted lips, and she had to fight not to cover herself as she lay bare to him.

"There are many ways to prepare your body for mine, princess," Xander murmured, "but this one is my favorite."

He lowered his head and placed a series of kisses on each of her thighs, trailing closer and closer to her hot core.

Calliope whimpered when her faithful knight's lips reached her flower. He kissed each side reverently, then used his tongue to part the p-petals, licking a firm st-stripe up the length...o-of...

Your reading stuttered when Lucifer's actions began to mimic Xander's. Now that his commentary wasn't cutting in every thirty seconds, the written experience being actively performed on you was much more erotic than you anticipated, and you reminded yourself to thank him for that little idea later.

"Keep reading," the blonde requested. You bit your lip and tried to ignore his warm breaths on your pussy. The words on the page were suddenly much harder to read.

He kissed each side reverently, then used his tongue to part the petals, licking a firm stripe up the length of her sex until he reached the little, pink bud at the top. Xander kissed it, d-delighting in the squeal he pulled from his beloved, then wrapped his lips around it and sucked g-g-gently while his fing-fingers circled her entrance.

Calliope felt like she was on fire. Her body responded to Xander's in a way she'd never known until tonight. It's like she was a violin, and he was the musician plucking every single one of her strings.

"Why is he plucking violin strings? Is he stupid?"

You groaned, now thoroughly turned on but annoyed by your partner's continuous interruptions.

"I'm just saying that's not how you play a —"

"Do you wanna eat me out like the bitch in the book or not!?"

The short king's red eyes widened, then his expression became unbearably smug. You resisted the urge to toss a pillow at his head.

"Look at you, playing hard to get at the beginning and now practically begging me to get lost between your thighs. I knew this would be fun for you. Maybe if you beg a little more, I'll —"

Pillows were too soft. You threw the book at him instead, relishing in his cry and the thunk that emanated from the collision.

"Next time you wanna do something fun, Luci," you said, getting up and kissing the blooming injury on his forehead, "don't criticize it start to finish."

"I'd argue there wasn't a finish," he pouted, wrapping his arms around you for a snuggle before you could pull away.

"Who's fault is that?"

"I'll make it up to you," Lucifer promised. "Anything you want, you name it."

That piqued your interest, a smug little grin of your own starting to form.

"Anything?"

He nodded excitedly. "Tell me what I can do for you, love. How will I make your dreams come true?"

"You."

"Me?" He echoed.

"And me."

"And you. Me and you," he chirped, practically bouncing as he hugged you tighter.

"And the biggest strap we can find."

What little color existed on his face drained away. Lucifer stared at you, eyes wide and round, then buried his head defeatedly in your shoulder. His blonde hair tickled your jaw, and you placed a gentle kiss to his temple.

"I did promise anything," he mumbled.

[fearandhatred]

ok so what if the reason crowley likes watching aziraphale eat is because nothing he does for himself can give him back the pleasure he felt when creating his stars, so the next closest feeling to that is through experiencing someone else's greatest pleasures. but it will never be enough

text below the cut

hunger is a funny thing; multifaceted, duplicitous there's a hunger to give and a hunger to take the hunger of passion and the hunger of greed

i knew only of the first type of hunger, before time, before sorrow back when there was just the explosions of supernovas, the heat of the cosmos, the planets in my grasp and the world at my feet back when i was the barycenter of the universe and all my steps created consecrated ground the souls at my tabernacled fingertips, helpless, hopeless, defenceless the power to do whatever i wanted to them and choosing only kindness

that was before i knew how it feels to have it all stripped away to go from being larger than life to living in it; from creating to the realisation of having been created, at the mercy of things of my own design to be helpless, hopeless, defenceless, in a world that was never kind to me

that was before i knew the agony of hunger pangs, bone deep and spiritual that carved out my marrows, left me substanceless and corrosive everywhere and nowhere, that nothing i did could satiate that nothing can satiate but grace

there's a hunger to give and a hunger to take and the damned have nothing left to give

but you do.

you take and you take and you take, never left wanting a taking borne not from desperate emptiness, for once, but one of indulgence you gorge yourself with selfish pleasure, glut yourself with food unneeded fulfilment, hunger stacked upon already-there satisfaction and in taking, so also do you give

with each fistful you grabbed of that ox rib i could imagine snatching my stars out of the sky pressing them down between my palms, permanent claiming marks seared into my hands i imagined swallowing them down, eruptions of light and neutrons on my tongue with each sip you take of wine i imagine myself sucking in the universe galaxies and planets orbiting in my stomach, the centre of the world's gravity i imagine breathing in liquid life, the warmth of existence stinging my throat

and for the first time, my hunger is sated by watching you sate yours for now, it's enough for me to just watch

so establish this covenant with me: take your fill of animals, of drink, of everything within reach stuff your heart full, consume the world raw, and i'll do the same with my eyes but after that, tear the flesh off my frame, gnaw on my hollow bones strip me of the little i'm still worth, leave me bare and stranded feast on my body, broken for you do this in remembrance of me, and maybe i'll do the same

because that hunger of creation i can never get back, no matter how much i try so now i just gorge myself on you

[religious-extremist]

I need guidance on something. I find myself committing sin (lying, anger) often - and I want to repent but I feel like it would be a lie to God because I know I will sin again, because I have fallen into these habits. I want to get better and seek God's forgiveness but I absolutely do not want to make false promises to God. I have asked other Christians about this but they all give me similar responses - "Just repent anyway, it's okay if you sin again," or "These sins are so minor, God doesn't care," or other things like this and it feels like being led astray to even consider these possibilities. I am asking you because I feel like an Orthodox Christian sticks more firmly to the Bible and not to modern interpretations of it.

Eagerly awaiting your response, and please pray for me. :)

St. Porphyrios used to say, “Do not fight to expel the darkness from the chamber of your soul. Open a tiny aperture for light to enter, and the darkness will disappear.”

All habitual sins are rooted in the passions: lying and anger are the fruits of pride, which is the seed of corruption. It is necessary to struggle against them and not despair of our salvation. We cannot give up the fight against the desires of the flesh; it is impossible to be a Christian while indulging in the pleasures of sin.

God gives us the weapons we need to fight the passions through the Church; through frequent confession and communion; through prayer and fasting. I recommend you talk to an Orthodox spiritual father, as I am only a layperson, and a terribly sinful and foolish one at that!

The only way to avoid sin is to have perfect prayer, to have perfect stillness of the heart, to hold fast to Christ and keep Him in the center of your thoughts at all times. Have you ever heard of the Jesus prayer and the hesychastic way of life?

St. Macarius of Optina said, “Pray simply. Do not expect to find in your heart any remarkable gift of prayer. Consider yourself unworthy of it. Then you will find peace. Use the empty cold dryness of your prayer as food for your humility.”

I wish to say, his advice can be used to advance in all of the other virtues aside from prayer. Pray for God to keep you from sin, and if you find yourself falling into sin, use the shame of sin as food for your humility.

St. Isaac the Syrian also said, “As salt is needed for all kinds of food, so humility is needed for all kinds of virtues.”

While Elder Ephraim said, “Grass does not sprout in trampled ground; likewise, passions and wickedness do not sprout in a humble soul. As long as we lack humility, God will not stop humbling us through trials until we learn this important and most salvific lesson.”

So you might wonder, how can I gain humility? When you find yourself angry, look inwards and remember your sin against God. Remember the unmerciful servant, the fool who received forgiveness for his debt from the King and then assailed a fellow servant for owing him much less than what he, himself, owed the King. Pray for those who sin against you, and thank God for the persecution you face, because He allows you to face temptations in order to heal your soul of its passions.

“In order to abide in the love of God it is essential for anger and 'hate' to attain their maximum intensity but be directed against the sin that lives in me, against the evil active in me - in me, not in my brother.” St. Silouan exhorted.

Most importantly, no one can attain these virtues unless they are in obedience to a spiritual father. People fall into delusion thinking they can live a spiritual life outside of the Church, but in doing so, they follow the whims of their heart and nourish not their souls but feed the evil passion of pride in their hearts. Disobedience was the first sin committed by man in Paradise, and it is by obedience to a spiritual father that we free ourselves from the harsh judgment of God.

Please forgive me and pray for me, inadequate and late in my answer. You are welcome to send me a message if you wish to speak. It is hard for me to answer these questions adequately without conversation, the answer is so vast and encompasses so many facets of the spiritual life that cannot be explained in a short paragraph by a stupid person like me, so I recall instead what the saints have said.

The spiritual life is mystical, you must participate in the prayers, services, fasts, and sacraments of the Church in order to find answers; it is not something I can give to you with words, but it is an experience of God. “God is the Lord and has revealed Himself to us!” The only way to know God is by divine revelation, not by mere will, and we find God revealed to us through His Church! “Taste and see that the Lord is good!” Indeed, He knocks at your door, only you must answer and meet the Bridegroom yourself.

I am praying for you. May the Panagia be with you! May God have mercy on us, my dear friend,

Prayer for the Granting of all Virtues by Saint Ephraim the Syrian

Grant me, O Son of the Good One, that for which my mind yearns, and join to it that which is pleasing to Thy will.

Grant that I may choose to do good and in no way deviate from Thy will.

Do not permit me to be a wicked and hypocritical disciple who violates Thy commandments.

Protect me from thinking that I can walk along Thy path merely for the sake of appearance and thus by my hypocrisy deceive those who see me, inciting them to proclaim me blessed.

Grant that my heart might please Thy greatness in secret, and that my just life might glorify Thee publicly.

May truth be a mistress to guide Thy worshipper; may it preserve me in chastity both near and far.

Deliver me from the misfortune of knowing Thy law, yet lacking the desire to please Thee.

Vouchsafe me the company of people who are simple, but experienced and wise in the performance of virtues.

My flesh is weak. Fortify it with Thy strength. Help me, break the arrows of the cunning enemy, and number me among the hosts of Thine heirs.

Grant me, O Lord, ever to be among Thy dominion and to do what is pleasing to Thee. And whenever I begin something good, do Thou, O Lord, give me strength to complete it.

I know, O Lord, that I have sinned against Thy will. Clearly do I see that I have transgressed Thy commands. But do Thou, who makest Thy sun to shine on the bad and the good, deign also to shine Thy light in my clouded mind. And sins — those murderers and robbers who have taken up residence inside of me — will be driven out by this Thy light.

The Evil One sees in me no wickedness that did not come from him, for it is because of him that I have become wicked. I am, however, conquered by him through my own free will. The Evil One has entangled me because I myself instructed him to do so.

The slothful and the timid run from Thy yoke; Thy love shames the negligent.

Praise be to Thy goodness, to that mother of all teachers. The blows that they deliver to bring the stubborn to their senses are perhaps quite painful, yet sympathetically do they offer healing to the penitent.

Worthy of veneration are Thy Father and Thy Holy Spirit, Who rejoices at our return!

[seiueina]

"do you like butts?" | ft. rin , shidou, isagi, nagi, !!! suggestive + established relationship + boys are pro players ! + short drabbles + self indulgent

₊˚⊹♡ ITOSHI RIN: "What kind of question is that?" Rin scoffed before looking at you. "It's a genuine question that needs to be answered duh!" You say before ruffling with his hair earning another eye roll from the man. "If you so wish to know. I don't care about them, it's normal to have one and if I'm attracted to someone. It won't be because of their behind. Happy?" He responds looking at your face. He sees you thinking as you tap your chin. "Then what do you find attractive if it isn't my butt?"

"Why're you asking me these questions all of a sudden?" He procks an eyebrow as he side eyes you, you shrug and he groans. "Well, I like competitive women. With a burning soul with passion. Someone who would be equal to me. For you, you and I are equal in skill for soccer. I can train and compete against you and it would feel like I am competing against myself.

"So you only find me attractive because I am good at soccer?" You exclaim, crossing your hands over your chest before turning yourself away from Rin. "I didn't say that." "But it sounded like you did!" "Doll, even if you sucked at soccer, I would help you improve. But from the moment I met you, I knew you were competitive. That's what I like." He says before tucking a piece of a loose strand of hair behind your ear, you slowly turn back to face him. "So really you don't find any part of my body attractive?" You pout and you recieve another eye roll from your boyfriend who slowly came closer to your ear.

"I most definitely find your legs attractive, especially when they're wrapped around my waist." He whispered into you ear before placing a peck on your ear lobes. Leaving you to become a blushing mess.

₊˚⊹♡ SHIDOU RYUSEI: When you go to the gym. It isn't usual for you to wear anything tight of some sort. You find them always getting inbetween your thighs and you constantly find yourself pulling at it mid sets so you always opt for a looser fit. But, you've fallen behind on laundry which brings you to slipping on short black bike shorts that stopped right under the plump of your butt.

Spank.

"Ryusei!" You shout as you turn to find your boyfriend who stood behind you. Staring at you with the biggest grin on Earth. "Sorry, just had to y'know." You scoff before placing your hands on your hips, "Do you like butts or something?" you ask before dusting your behind and walking besides your boyfriend to finish up getting ready. "I like your butt, I mean how could I not? Look at this!!" He follows behind, groping at your butt. You roll your eyes, "Tell me more." You flirt, looking at him from the mirror in which you stood in front of. "Oh babe, you don't want to get me started on that." He says, his eyes becoming hearts as he looks down. "I like the shape of your butt. It's round and plump. The recoil...makes me go insane..." He says as he pokes at your butt until you swat his hands away. "Should wear these types of pants more often." Ryusei says following your every moment to the kitchen, filling up your water bottle. "Are you gonna fill my water bottle or just gawk at my ass?" You chuckle as you see him watching. "Just gonna watch...your movements are too entincing. Can't wait till you come back home.." He says, coming close to you wrapping his hands around your waist. You push his loose pieces of hair behind his ear, "You can come with me.." "I know. But as much as I want to. I know you're going with your friends and I don't like being there with them...so I'll let the guys stare at you today...because I am gonna have this ass all to myself tonight." He says as he continues to grope your bottom and placed scattered kisses over your face and neck.

"Behave yourself while I am gone~" You laugh. placing a hand on his chest before placing a kiss on his lips then grabbing your gym bag, heading out for the gym.

"I can feel the dopamine coming~"

₊˚⊹♡ ISAGI YOICHI: "Yoichi, what do you think of butts?" You spoke randomly, catching him off guard you see him start to blush at your question. "Um..well. Y'know I like your thighs.." He slowly speaks, grazing his hand up your thigh, teasing.

"I think butts are nice...they're soft but nothing can compare to your thighs.." Yoichi says with confidence, looking you up and down. Now leaving you as a blushing mess.

"Yoichi~ don't do that!!" You say, not daring to give him any eye contact, removing his hand from your thigh. "What? You asked me what I thought and I answered.." He says slyly, "Don't get all coy on me..y/N."

"I am not! I just wasn't expecting you to respond in that way!" You say, getting up from the couch as you hurriedly walked to the kitchen to splash water on your face. "Now your turn. What do you think of butts?" He bluntly asks as you patted your face with a kitchen towel.

"I like them..because you can do this!" You exclaim out loud as you caught him off guard by slapping his butt, you let out a cheeky laugh until you saw his grin that was plastered on his face. "y/N get back here!" He chases after you, looping him from the kitchen island.

"Don't be a bad girl." He chuckles before tricking you and grabbing you by the waist and throwing you over his shoulder. "Yep, I stand by this. I rather your thighs than your butt." He says before putting you down.

"What is that supposed to mean?" You ask and before you knew it, you were being cut off with a smack on your bottom. "Yoichi!"

₊˚⊹♡ NAGI SEISHIRO: "I don't care. Butts are butts. I shouldn't need to spend time on thinking if I like a persons butt or not." He slurs out as he takes a sip of his orange juice. "So you don't mind if I don't have a butt?" He sighs, dropping his head into the crook of your neck before using one of his free hands to squeeze one of your cheeks.

"Sei! What're you doing?" You say, startled as you see his game on pause, you could feel his smile laying on the crock of your neck. "You do have a butt. Look I am gripping it." He says before pulling it and ending it with a spank, jolting you forward. Rubbing yourself on his lower half. "Shouldn’t be comparing yourself to others y’know..” He says and you can hear the clicking of the keyboard as he resumes his game. Here and there he'd pepper kisses around your face and neck.

“I am not comparing myself...I just wanted to know if find them attractive..." You whisper, traveling your hands up from his neck into his white hair, twisting it through your digits.

"I find anything attractive about you but you know what I really find attractive?" He asks and you hum, letting him continue. "I find myself rather attracted when I find you under my desk, eager to rip my pants off.." He continues and you unconsciously squeeze his hair in response and you hear a chuckle.

© satoberrie 2023 | should i do other characters?

[sophswritingthings]

OK AS A HISTORY NERD NOW IM INTRIGUED ON MORE OF YOUR THOUGHTS FOR MIZU X !PERFORMER READER

pairing: mizu x fem!street performer!reader

warning(s): none

a/n: allowing me to indulge in my history fixation while writing gay fanfic? oh babe LET ME TELL YOU—

summary: after meeting the mysterious street performer, mizu follows you back to the theater. which, has a library. you spend your time together, what little you have of it, taking and learning about one another’s culture.

word count: 577 words / 3,227 characters

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you lead mizu back to a nearby theater, greeting other secret performers as you walk in. they eye you a bit suspiciously, seeing who is following you. but no words are exchanged.

you take mizu back to a library; walls cascading with books up and down.

she’d never seen anything like it.. such a large library filled with colorful books of english, and, supposedly—american history. and there had to be something on japan, too, because you seemed to know things about her culture well.

“so, why have you traveled from japan, exactly?” you pose the question, grabbing a candle and beginning to riffle through piles of literature. 

she wasn’t telling you she was here to assassinante a man. you’d think her terrifying. heartless. ruthless. cold.

to which, to some extent, she was.

“I’m.. here, visiting family,” she whispered. wasn’t exactly wrong.

you chuckled, “the white man you mentioned? your father?” you whip around to look at her for a moment.

“yes,” she responds rather quickly. “I haven’t met him, before.”

you nod, “japan closed its borders—deported all the white men and women there,” you respond. “it makes sense you’ve never met him. are you.. judged, in some way?”

she scoffed, “I’m sure you have no idea,” she folded her arms. “I am what they call an onryō. a demon.”

your eyes widen, gazing at her as you walked over with a stack of books you looked to be struggling to carry.

“demon?” you murmur, watching as she takes some of the books from your arms. “just for being born of a white man?”

she nods, “yes.” she narrowed her eyes, “it’s not exactly fun.”

you scoff, “I didn’t think it would be—constantly having a bounty of your back for your dead body,” you settle down at a desk, smiling and patting the seat beside you.

she sits down beside you, gazing at the many books.

“well—here in england, those eyes are considered beautiful,” you smiled softly at her. “I think they’re beautiful.”

she’d never heard such kind words before. especially about a part of herself she hated so very much.

“thank you,” she whispered, her voice barley audible.

you chuckled, your cheeks tinted rosy red, “though I suppose I am one for all things weird.”

she laughed along with you, “how so?”

“as I told you—a woman such as myself is not allowed to do much. I am expected to marry at sixteen, settle down with many kids, and never leave my house. I cannot work, I cannot do anything here,” your eyes narrowed, gazing at the book below you, “I just want to perform. to act—it’s my passion. It’s something I love.”

she nodded slowly, “I see,” she muttered. “It’s much different in japan. women can work.. though it’s not like they have many options. and.. performing. It’s one of the many things women do in japan.”

“I know!” you hissed, “performing should not be something that is restricted to men. nothing should be restricted to me; we should all be… equal.”

mizu couldn’t help but agree with you. she felt the same way; seeing as she was here, masking as a man her whole life to be able to do what she wanted.

you talked for hours on end. hours on hours of talking about your culture, about your lives, about what you’d been through. 

you were so similar; yet from completely different parts of this world.

she found that amazing.

she found you amazing.

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a/n: I’m presenting said project tomorrow and my anxiety said no

[ohtheewhorer]

Kinktober Day 6: Mutual Masturbation

Perv!70s!Dale Ferdinand “Longlegs” Kobble x Roommate!Mean!Reader

Summary: You catch Dale masturbating and I guess you’ll join or whatever.

Warnings: 18+ smut, m & f masturbation, cum eating, dirty talk, mommy kink

* i do not own image above

Dale clasps a hand over his mouth as his free hand works over his cock. He couldn’t risk being too loud or you’d be very mad. Your rule is that there will be no noise of any kind by 8 pm unless someone’s dying. In other words, you do not appreciate being disrupted from your sleep so Dale’s late night jam sessions were a thing of the past.

He both feared and admired you, finding himself abiding by any rule you’ve probably made up on the spot simply because you were annoyed with him one day. The dark father seems to like the wicked energy you radiate as well, encouraging interactions of which would make you punish Dale.

Like the time the Dark Father told Dale to steal one of your eyeshadow palettes and you retorted by making Dale piss his pants in front of you.

But Dale couldn’t deny that he gets all hot and bothered with any attention you provide him. Most of the time you’re quite dismissive and short with him and he’s fine with this but when you spew mean words at him—oh, it gets him going.

So it’s no surprise that after you’d told him off for leaving the toilet seat up that he found himself rushing to his bedroom to stick his hands down his pants. He doesn’t pleasure himself often, if any at all but when he does it’s hard to control his volume with how sensitive he is.

He whines a little louder this time, heart racing when he hears it bounce around the thin walls. There was no doubt that you heard it. You’d come in at any second now to berate him. He’s sure of it. Realizing that there’s no point in silencing himself, he indulges stroking himself harder and pulling sounds from his own mouth.

You bang on his door but his moans are so loud they swallow the sound so you have no choice but to enter and lay eyes on the eye-boggling scene before you.

“Oh my god, Dale! Seriously?” You yell, throwing your hand over your eyes.

“I’m sorry, little angel. I couldn’t help myself.” He whines, still working his fat cock.

God, why was it so big? Well, you know exactly why. Just look at the size of him entirely, you’re so tiny in comparison. Your thigh clench together at the thought. Oh, and those perfect, large hands of his…mmm. Maybe you can yell at him another time.

You move your hand away from your eyes watching him in the throes of passion; eyes rolling back and his filler pink lips parted to let out wheezy gasps.

You find yourself, caressing your hands down your body and biting your lips. The throbbing need between your legs more prominent than ever before.

“I’m only going to touch myself because I need the relief, not because I’m liking what I see here.” You get on your knees onto the mattress on the ground, pushing your hand under your skirt and pushing your underwear to the side. You gather the slick that pooled heavily in the gusset of your lace panties, bringing it to your clit and rubbing circles in tandem to Dale’s pumping.

Your moans and groans blend into one like a beautiful symphony. The closer you got the sloppier you got with your play, grinding down on your hand and panting as you imagine that it’s his beautiful porcelain-like face between your legs.

“You’re so beautiful,” Dale rasps. “I want you to be my pretty little doll to play with.”

“I’d rather you be my doll,” You counter. “I’d make you wear pretty dresses for me and fuck you silly in them. Let you call me mommy.” You plunge a finger inside yourself, working yourself up with your own words. Now you definitely need to let that happen sometime. “Dale, m’gonna cum.”

“Oh, fuck!” Dale cries out spilling in his hands and little belly. His orgasm, a mix contribution of you igniting his need to be your doll and the way you sobbed his name. He’s spurting thick hot ropes that shoot a great distance onto his mattress from how hard he comes.

You’re not far behind, falling forward to where your right cheek rests against his bed as you rode your hand and gutturally moan. Your juices gush onto your fingers, giving you added lubrication as you continue to thrust.

When you’ve both calm, you take the initiative to stick your honeyed fingers passed his full lips and he immediately accepts them, swirling his tongue carefully around each finger.

You pet his head adoringly, making him choke on your fingers a little. “You’re lucky you’re so pretty because the next time you wake me up from my sleep, I’m going to make sure you cum for me until you’re dry.”

[puppyjune]

kill her. kill her. kill her.

she looks so beautiful. the bruises. the tears.

but the blood. the blood is holy. divine; the original temptation. once i see scarlet spread across her skin, i can barely stop. the lust, the drive, the carnal desire for brutality.

eyes starting to glaze over, i finally lessen my grip on her neck. so close, edging myself with her life. can i really hold myself back? what if i dont stop?

theres always next time.

why must i be so angry? its all ive known. walking into existence brings me these feelings. part of me wants to grow, but the comfort of that angry impassionate shell is so tempting. i try to step out, brave the new world of emotion. it backfires. over and over, all i know is negativity. oh, but how satisfying that rage is. grab that bat, lay her down whether she wants it or not.

…that may not be "kind", or "empathetic". but what else do i know? its just so easy to do. shes practically begging for it, im actually being nice by abusing her; right?

no no no, i get told that isnt the right way. but if so, why does it feel so good? is this the forbidden fruit? let me bite into her skin and learn what true sin is, carve it into her so she can be enlightened. oh, to be cut. the beauty of those lines, they make shiver with delight.

ah. empathy. that thing. do i really need it? i do? thats fucked. well, lets try a different approach.

brushing away some hair, i kiss her forehead and pull her close. the weight of her head on my body, the way she smiles, it just warms my heart. maybe i can understand what it means to be kind and empathetic. but why does she look at me that way? i must be imagining it. she couldnt possibly want… that. i blush, thinking of how close i came last time; shes probably thinking im blushing from her beauty right now. but all i can think of is the image of her choking herself for my pleasure. the knife on her skin.

i cant stop myself, i need that. violence, god does it make me feel fulfilled. its my one true passion, my vice, the thing that keeps my heart beating and my lust fueled. and why shouldnt i indulge? shes asking for it. obviously. cmon, that was totally what she was thinking, i dont need to ask. its more fun if i dont ask her.

ah, here again. layed out before me, a canvas to play with. i start sweet, checking in after every hit, watching where i hit and how hard, making sure to kiss her marked body.

hit, hit, hit. i look into her eyes, shes starting to squirm, maybe the pain is a bit much? i start to think about asking her if i should tone it down, or maybe just tone it down without asking, play it safe.

oh fuck, shes starting to squirm. this is what i need, the nectar ive been craving. i cant stop myself, i cant hold back. keeping her pinned down, swing after swing of that whip crashes down. my vision blurs, i feel such immense lust i cant think of anything else. how many hits until she fights back, until i have an excuse to really raise the stakes? oh please little pet, try and fight me. i need you to, then i cant be blamed for what happens next. but i get stopped. some part of me pulls me back, telling me to slow down. she gets to live a little longer.

i cant just stop now, i need to get these feelings out. "turn over. now."

good, now i have a fresh canvas to once again paint with pain. over and over, i whip her. its just, not good enough. i already did this, im over it, the rush is gone. i need to kill.

looking over, i see my bat. or specifically, a kendo sword. those bound strips of wood, that slight bend, just adds such a wonderful sprinkle on top of the pain from the swing. shes still down, dazed from the whip.

hit. hit. hit. kill. break her legs. she cant run. she cant resist. one swift hit to the head, bash her face with the bat, then there will be no resistance.

oh, ive done it again. i nearly couldnt stop myself. here i am, having mounted her, bat pressed against her neck, my entire weight and strength being offered for her demise. i need it, i need her to die. i need to kill. the marks on her legs shine against her pale skin. i made sure each leg had a good enough mark to make it difficult to walk, impossible to run. along with every. other. bruise. god, does she look beautiful. i feel true pleasure fill my heart as i look into her eyes. those divine eyes. tears silently rolling down her reddened face, the look of pain only brought by my abuse, the way you can see just how close she came to death. those dull eyes, barely able to comprehend what they see. if i could only have one wish, it would be to watch the life drain from peoples eyes as i use them for my pleasure.